['In the middle of the night I heard some weird noises coming from my basement. I grabbed my flashlight and baseball bat and tip-toed down there.', 'Should have grabbed the gun.', 'To my utter shock I saw the biggest rat I ever seen. I swear it was two feet long. I shrieked like a banshee and bolted outside.']
I would have shot that thing dead and then burned it. Then ate it for dinner.
Last night I heard strange noises coming from my basement. I creeped down the stairs with a flashlight. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw a humongous rat in the corner!