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My all-time favorite true story occured when I tried to help my dad (I bet that for everyone here, our parents are our #1 support customers).
Dad reports following problem: in the last month or so, the mouse started acting strange. Every time he gestures right, the mouse goes left. When he wants to go up, the mouse moves down.
I look it up online, suspecting some virus having fun. Can't find anything.
Dad reports that he got used to the problem, he just has to gesture in the opposite way and then he can use the computer again. Not a great workaround, but it's good enough for him.
At my next visit home, I finally can diagnose the problem live instead of over the phone: Dad was holding the mouse upside down.
True story - lasted for a month before problem was fixed. My fault for not figuring it out sooner.
FairSoftware.net [fairsoftware.net]: where geeks create side-businesses together
But they charged us $600 to chop off dad's hands and reattach them the other way round.
I would say it is best to avoid geek squad.
I once tried to teach a fifty-year-old something about computers.
First of all, instead of watching the screen and listening to what I was telling him, he was taking notes. Detailed notes.
However, the reason I'm writing this isn't that. It's the mouse.
First it took me a while to explain him what it is, how it is used – he did take detailed notes about that, too, including details on left, right and middle click – and then I had to try and make him stop looking at the goddamned mouse while he m
There was an older woman who had trouble understanding the mouse. She had to hold it steady with one hand while clicking the buttons on the mouse with her other hand.
So I showed her how to play solitaire on the computer.
A week later she had mastered the mouse.
It's all about finding the right way for that particular person to learn.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solitaire_(Windows) [wikipedia.org]
Microsoft intended Windows Solitaire "to soothe people intimidated by the operating system", and at a time where many users were still unfamiliar with graphical user interfaces, it proved useful in familiarizing them with the use of a mouse, such as the drag-and-drop technique required for moving cards.
My own personal favorite comes from the days of 5.25" floppy drives, as relayed by my own dad (who worked in IT back then).
A customer called in to complain that the software install that they were doing would always fail when it got to the second disk. The support guy ran through most of the standard procedures, and running out of ideas directed the customer to insert the diagnostics disk that came with the software.
After a short pause, the customer responded "There's no way to squeeze that in there." The support minion promptly discovered that when the customer saw the instruction "Insert disk 2", she was putting in disk 2 without removing disk 1 first.
Interestingly, in the early 90's I started seeing installation tools that said "remove disk 1 and insert disk 2". Either this story got out, or it happened more frequently than I would have thought.
haha, except it's not the user's fault, who is not a professional computer person, unlike the programmer. the answer is much simpler: programmers are unable to communicate.
have you ever the documentation they write? It's usually easier to just try everything in their program and see what happens. That's what I do, and that's what you do. You know it's true.
Mod me down, bitches, you know it's true.
"have you ever the documentation they write?"
No, but I the post you wrote, and it was hilarious!
I changed careers and am now a mortician. These days I get fewer stupid questions from my clients.
Why can't you fix hiiiiiiiiiiiim???
I've had two of those happen this month.
First case:
We got an email saying the internet was down and had been for 15 minutes. We monitor this company's connection with a constant ping (every 5 min or so). If it goes down, we'll know. We didn't get one. Plus we were able to VPN in and get on their servers.
Called the customer up. Turns out www.msn.com was busted and wouldn't load. Google, Yahoo, CNN and BBC worked just fine.
It was very likely they heard a badly suppressed laugh right before I hung up.
Second case:
Another company's internet tanks. We can't ping their public ip, they're down. This happened on a Monday, 10AM.
After dragging AT&T there on a leash so they could swap out some hardware (inside a locked box...), the net started working again, Tuesday, 2PM.
We got an email from them shortly after it came back up, dated Monday, 11AM... "Our internet's down."
I need to print both of those out and frame them.
Users really don't 'get' the internet.
Every once in a while get panicked calls from people in other departments saying "really important web-based product is DOWN! FIX IT NOW! We're losing money".
It has taken us quite a bit of time to train the users to first check if another site is reachable (usually Google.com, since it's so reliable). Our internet connection (the actual link, the router, or some other part) goes down at least 6x as often as the system. It's a rare occurrence now. Our system is highly
I had someone email me requesting help getting email back up. To be fair, when he called a few minutes later wondering why I hadn't responded, he immediately realized his error when I said "You EMAILED me that the email server was down?".
Cases like this:
C: I got an error on my screen
S: What message text was displayed?
C: I don't know, I clicked it away
S: --explode--
That's actually not a rare incident. I don't even wonder how many readers nod their head to this statement because it's been an endless source to their own frustration.
One wonders why. Why do people just click away all messages sent to them by the system? I actually remember an incident where I was called to fix "something with the server". Turned out to be a raid6 system that lost three drives and thus didn't work anymore. Now, I hear you say, how can a raid6 system fail? Raid6 can lose two drives and still work. Three drives dying, power surge maybe? No.
One drive failed, but the hotspare took over. The server beeped, so the beeper was cut off. The server reported dutifully that a drive was blown, which was equally dutifully clicked away without reading it.
Another drive failed, but it still somehow managed to keep going. No beep this time since even the best beepers fail to work when they are not connected. And finally the whole system failed to provide data, or they'd probably have continued 'til a rebuilt would have been impossible.
But the real kicker was that I was being yelled at how we dare to sell a Raid6+spare as a system that prevents data loss. It does, when you don't do your best to ignore every information it gives you about an impending catastrophe.
And this is hardly an isolated case of stupidity. People simply close every warning information they get because "I don't understand it anyway". Without reading it, how do you KNOW whether you understand it?
I dare you to ask that question. It usually results in more yelling, but no really enlightening answers.
Maybe the solution would be something like:
"Warning! The raid system is failing! Please type in the first six letters of the alphabet to close this window. ______"
If a message is important enough, you shouldn't be able to just click it away IMO.
That's actually not a rare incident. I don't even wonder how many readers nod their head to this statement because it's been an endless source to their own frustration.
One wonders why. Why do people just click away all messages sent to them by the system? I actually remember an incident where I was called to fix "something with the server". Turned out to be a raid6 system that lost three drives and thus didn't work anymore. Now, I hear you say, how can a raid6 system fail? Raid6 can lose two drives and still work. Three drives dying, power surge maybe? No.
One drive failed, but the hotspare took over. The server beeped, so the beeper was cut off. The server reported dutifully that a drive was blown, which was equally dutifully clicked away without reading it.
Another drive failed, but it still somehow managed to keep going. No beep this time since even the best beepers fail to work when they are not connected. And finally the whole system failed to provide data, or they'd probably have continued 'til a rebuilt would have been impossible.
But the real kicker was that I was being yelled at how we dare to sell a Raid6+spare as a system that prevents data loss. It does, when you don't do your best to ignore every information it gives you about an impending catastrophe.
And this is hardly an isolated case of stupidity. People simply close every warning information they get because "I don't understand it anyway". Without reading it, how do you KNOW whether you understand it?
I dare you to ask that question. It usually results in more yelling, but no really enlightening answers.
I think there is an explanation for this, or at least a partial one.
Microsoft makes a decent keyboard but other than that, I don't use anything Microsoft on my own machines and this has been the case for about ten or eleven years. I'll often go long periods of time without ever using Windows. If not for my friends who use it and ask me for help with problems from time to time, I might have lost the skillset. Because of that, when I do sit down at a Windows machine, I can easily see the contrast between the way things are done on it and the way things are done on other systems.
One thing about Windows that I find to be a nuisance is that so many non-critical messages will trigger system-modal dialog boxes. The examples of this are too numerous for me to begin to enumerate them here, not to mention it would be a rather boring list, but if you have experience with multiple operating systems then you have probably noticed this too. The problem with this approach is that users quickly grow accustomed to the idea that these messages are not very important and can be safely ignored. It becomes something like the "boy who cried wolf" fable, in that it sets up a situation where the occasional important error message gets ignored. Using Windows XP makes me feel this way; I can only imagine how much more true this is for Vista's UAC system.
I'm not saying that this fully explains your example involving RAID 6, only that it is a particularly egregious example of a much more general tendency.
... I will be rich when I invent a device to stab someone in the face over the internet.
But then you'll have to give support for it.
That will be the best part.
Any chance you could also invent a way to stab people in the face over the telephone while you're at it? And I would add to your list:
6) Complain the network admin/ISP help desk that they can't get to a website [when they can get to other websites, so obviously the network isn't the problem]
7) Don't know the difference between turning off the monitor and restarting the computer
8) Don't know the difference between a modem and a network card
9) Call for tech support from their cell phone when their landline
To the people who....
1) Send me screenshots inside a word document
2) Ask what FTP is when they're supposed to be a server admin
3) Can't run a select statement but are supposed to be the DBA.
4) insist the network is up even though we don't see any packets through an *inline* appliance
5) say the problem is super urgent, but then refuse to try anything you say.
I'll never understand what it is about computers that brings out so much of what must be latent stupidity. In your list, number five really captures it. I can't tell you how common that one is although it sounds like you know from experience.
It seems like no other specialists have that problem on such a routine basis. When someone's doctor says "you have X disease" they generally don't look at him and say "no I don't." When an electrician says that something needs to be rewired, they might get a second opinion but they don't usually argue with the guy. Same deal with mechanics. With almost any other specialist it's understood that if you come to them, it's because you recognize that they know a lot more about medicine, electricity, or auto repair than you do.
What do techies get? They get uncooperative users who come to you for help and when you give it, they argue with you and bicker and drag their feet every step of the way, insisting that such-and-such can't possibly work, until it does work, at which time they complain about how long it took or they give you some bullshit about how they just tried that and it didn't work for them. Of course there are exceptions, but this is the norm and I can't understand why this applies so much more to computing. What I am talking about has nothing to do with the user's technical expertise or anything like that. It's the simple principle that if you know more about computing or networking than I do, there is no point in seeking my help. No technical expertise is required to understand this simple principle.
Anyway, for the non-technically inclined who think that we're a bunch of arrogant elitists, this is an example of why we say users are stupid. It's not because we expect them to become experts or even technically knowledgable, it's because we constantly see users complicate simple things, drop all basic standards of common sense and mutual respect, and otherwise engage in behavior that is in no one's interests, particularly theirs.
There's also the fact that tech. support is usually free. If they were paying for the services (i.e. taking it to Geek Squad) they'd be much less likely to complain about your fixes.
One time in the late 80s I was in the Harvard U. computer sales office (back when people bought computers through their university) just inquiring about prices.
The sales person told me that a very irate professor from Harvard Business School called her up and was yelling about the fact that his new Compaq luggable (suitcase-sized) PC wouldn't turn on.
She asked him if he had plugged it in and he shouted "You're not supposed to plug it in! It's a portable!" She suggested he try it nonetheless and he hung up
I have to tell you that techies often get the "no I don't" kind of response because of all the wrong diagnoses that have been given in the past. I can count many times when I have instructed a technician on what to do, what I have tried, and then get some half-assed "please reboot", or "check the ethernet cable" or whatever. The thing is, it is impossible to tell the smart, slashdot reading help desk personnel from the just-graduated-from-college-and-trying-to-find-a-real-IT-job person.
Let's see... last week I actually noticed my mouse wandering around on the screen where it wasn't supposed to go. Then the computer opened up a Windows Explorer on its own. No shit. So I opened up Notepad, in between wrestling control over my mouse, and wrote "This is my computer, what the heck are you doing on it?"
The response was "Are you employee #XXXXXXXXXX with the email problem?"
My response: "No, I am working at home and wondering why you took control of my computer."
Him: "Sorry, I am trying to help another user."
Me: "Please give me your name, phone number and department so I can check who you are."
Him: "Sorry, Matt Smith, XXX-XXX-XXXX, Support Desk"
Me: "No worries, don't let it happen again."
I let him drop after that. And here I was freaking out that during my "work" from home, at the exact point I happened to be browsing Slashdot on the company laptop, that they were on to me and I was busted. I am probably busted anyway based on the logs...
There's a flip side to that, most admins I've run into presume you are a stupid user and that merely aiming a few steps at your brain, with no explanation about what the steps do or why they are necessary, is sufficient to send you, the miscreant, away so they can get back to playing with the network or sucking on their thumbs or whatever it is admins do to amuse themselves. Whatever problem we have, it is always an imposition on their precious time which never involves teaching us enough so that we won't be in their office in another 6 months when we cannot recall the magic incantations since the problem was never fully explained to us in the first place...leading the sainted admins to crack wise knowing inside jokes about the stupidity they manage to put up with (read: instill) in their users.
>Whatever problem we have, it is always an imposition on their precious time which never involves teaching us enough so that we won't be in their office in another 6 months
Wow, bitter mcuh?
My time is precious. I cant baby every single user. If I do something I cant spend 30 minutes explaining to you the nitty gritty details of what happened, our network infrastructure, etc.
>leading the sainted admins to crack wise knowing inside jokes about the stupidity they manage to put up with (read: instill) in their users.
So youre saying that if you knew the details youd be able to fix everything yourself. So lets say we are having some problems with one of lines and I need to quickly put in a static route on your desktop. Am I going to sit you down and explain to you what a route is and how the route command works. Heck, if I did that then I could expect a lot of random routes put in by "smart" guys like you.
Hey, at the end of the day its a job. You took the job and you need to learn to live with how the business is run. If you want full admin rights and want to be able to get into the routers you are more than welcome to bring this up with your boss. We'd love to hear how all the "elitist" IT people are keeping you down and how your accounting degree from State U along with your WoW addiction makes you much better qualified to do everything.
Perhaps you should just let us do our fucking jobs so we can go home at 5 just like you do. Thanks.
It seems like no other specialists have that problem on such a routine basis. When someone's doctor says "you have X disease" they generally don't look at him and say "no I don't." When an electrician says that something needs to be rewired, they might get a second opinion but they don't usually argue with the guy. Same deal with mechanics. With almost any other specialist it's understood that if you come to them, it's because you recognize that they know a lot more about medicine, electricity, or auto repair than you do.
To be fair, after the Internet, I now question other experts MUCH more often than I used to.
Ok, so I'll probably respect an electricians'/doctors'/mechanics' opinion a lot more, just because they have a lot more practical experience, but I've found bad diagnoses made by good doctors, mechanics usually want to stuff you with used parts, and electricians might make questionable decisions (usually aesthetic or with cabling).
Of the three, I think doctors might be the more similar because they encounter a wide
I disagree with your doctor analogy. You bet doctors have to deal with the same sort of issues we deal with. Yes, even outright denial. Afterall, a doctor is just a technician. He just works with a different type of machine.
The real issue here isnt about IT its that IT is a test. It tests your problem solving skills and your learning skills. It turns out that most people have horrible skills thus all the horror stories.
In my career Ive found that people who do well with technology or have patience tend to be good people in other parts of their lives. Those who are impatient and bad with technology tend to be mouth-breathing dolts everywhere else in their lives too. Ignoring novices, its rare to meet someone who is just "bad at computers." They're usually pretty bad at everything.
What do techies get? They get uncooperative users who come to you for help and when you give it, they argue with you and bicker and drag their feet every step of the way, insisting that such-and-such can't possibly work, until it does work, at which time they complain about how long it took or they give you some bullshit about how they just tried that and it didn't work for them.
I was working as a programmer for a university, and I had someone from the helpdesk put in a trouble ticket to me, complaining tha
I'll never understand what it is about computers that brings out so much of what must be latent stupidity.
Well, it's like people believe that computers run on magic and that the normal rules of physics don't apply to them. Example questions:
I can understand ignorant questions, because a lot of the stuff we do is pretty complex and non-obvious. I just can't understand dumb questions, the ones that show a complete lack of critical thinking.
Let me preface this by saying, I agree. People can be dumb. However, I have found a way to look past it and truly love my IT job. Here's a couple tenets I suggest you consider:
1) If it wasn't for people doing stupid things, IT/helpdesk people wouldn't have jobs. Granted, it can be like babysitting sometimes, but I have come to appreciate the ignorance that some people have simply because they know that they can come to me and I can fix it. That makes me a valuable resource.
2) Smart people don't know easy things about computers. I work for a company that does very low level computer science stuff, we have many PhD types who know their niche of computers inside and out, but if you stray them 10 feet from the path they know they're completely lost. Those guys need me because even though I don't know how to design a microchip or synthesize FPGA code, I do know how to fix their terminal when they've hit Control-Q. (Not to say I'm not a technical guy, but this is the type of stuff that you gotta fix for them sometimes.)
3) Everyone says or does stupid things every day of their life. It's unavoidable. By treating customers/users with respect (even if at the moment you don't feel like they deserve it) it endears you to them. You don't know what's going on in their lives that might have them distracted from the technical aspects of their job.
More than once I've felt 'Aww come on, you should know this!' only to find out that the user has some terrible event going on in their life and they couldn't care less about researching the problem or extending their computer knowledge -- they don't want to be in the office but they have to be, they're up against a deadline, they just want it to work now and they send up a signal flare for the IT guys to come and make everything better.
Enjoy those moments, if you're a typical shy nerd like me it's one of the brighter moments you'll get in your professional life to be the hero to someone whos at their wits end.
Six months of AI programming will make you think there is a God. Six months of tech support and you'll know there isn't.
Six months of each will make you realize that there is a God, and his sense of humor sucks. (I still have scars from doing about six months of AOL tech support.)
Doing tech support it is easy to make fun of the User but please keep in mind some things...
1. Even though you repeat the same advice over and over any particular user will only get it once perhaps twice on average.
2. Most people are not IT Specialists they have other focuses and concerns in their life. Computers are not a big deal. Lets use a car analogy, and the person didn't know if their car is front wheel drive, rear wheel drive, or all wheel drive (I am leaving out 4 wheel drive because there is normally a button that says so). As far as they know it is a car and it gets them to point A and B, the fact that it may be rear wheel drive is irrelevant to them especially if they don't need to drive in snow. However if you are car nut, the fact that someone wouldn't know this fact seems like the person is from a different planet.
3. Even people who are good with IT have gaps or operate on misconceptions. He may be a professor in computer science and knows everything about AI. However he may have never used a Unix system, or done FTP. Here is a challenge for you. If you have never used VMS no matter how good you are at Unix, I bet if you sit in front of the VMS system you will feel like a newbee as all your commands are different and even the full structure is odd.
4. When they do call you, they are embarrassed or fed up. So they will not be in the best of moods. Support is one of those cases when you see people at their worst not their best.
The problem is that most users are stuck on number 5.
Maybe I'm just getting old and losing my sense of humor, but it seems like these "ha ha users are dumb" stories get less and less funny. As the audience for personal computing continues to grow, the number of senile, mentally ill or simply ignorant users will also grow. Mocking them leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
I have had one or two encounters with genuinely ill people in this profession. It's hard to laugh at them.
An elderly gentleman came in to the shop where I once worked and said he had some questions about his battery backup. I was called up to answer them.
I found myself at something of a loss, however, when I heard his questions. It seemed that his UPS was emitting radioactive gas that was making him ill. He knew, he said, that they used fission piles to make them work, and that all this talk of batteries was nonsense. It was clear from the way he spoke of it that both he and I were in on this little secret. What he needed, he said, was some way to check the radioactive output of the UPS. Alternative suggestions as to the cause of his discomfort were dismissed quickly; he clearly knew the source of his illness, but had to find a way to prove it before he could take proper action. I got the distinct impression he had already tried to contact the manufacturer about it.
I did the only thing I could think of: I checked with my boss to see if he knew where a Geiger counter could be found. He didn't, alas, so I gave the customer some contact information for the US NRC. This seemed to satisfy him, and he left. I never saw him again.
Not once did that old man smile. His face was deeply lined and I don't think he had led an easy life. I often wonder what happened to him, and if there was anything else I could have done to help him.
I've had a customer like this as well. He was in the early stages of Alzheimer's. He would often times have problems getting his documents to print, claiming the printer drivers were the problem. Every time I saw his machine, he had at least a dozen identical drivers installed for his printer. I typed up the instructions for what I did to his machine each time I saw it for him. That reduced the number of visits to the shop for his printer problems.
He was great fun to talk with about the old times. He was an engineer that worked on designing some of the first punch card readers. Tragic the way that knowledge can be taken away from someone like that.
If I recall correctly, we only charged him on his first visit, before realizing what the true nature of his problem was.
It sounds to me like you did the right thing. When dealing with someone living in an alternate reality, especially someone who seems otherwise capable of caring for himself (which is the impression I got from your description), it is often best to work with his delusions instead of trying to push through them. Your contact info certainly satisfied him more than any amount of explaining to him why he is wrong, and the respect you showed by not ridiculing him is highly commendable.
We are given neither the t
I did the only thing I could think of: I checked with my boss to see if he knew where a Geiger counter could be found.
o_O That's what I imagine your boss looked like, hearing that from you as you returned from a supposedly peaceful support mission. For a moment, he probably wondered if you would go on with "We also need gas masks, explosives and guns, lots of guns. The fire exit at the back is safe for now - guide women and children there NOW.". Who knows what can emerge from the more distant facilities in this wicked office building.
I took a call from an end user a couple of months ago, informing me she was having trouble changing her password. She was receiving an error message that said "Passwords cannot begin or end with a space."
When she asked me what to do, I focused all of my energy on maintaining calm professionalism and replied "If you're typing a space before the new password - don't; if you're typing a space after the new password - don't."
Her reply?
"Hey that worked! You guys are so smart, I don't know how you can remember all this stuff!"
The real WTF is why the application didn't just trim the spaces off the password once it was entered. And we call users stupid...
The real WTF is why the application didn't just trim the spaces off the password once it was entered.
I utterly, wholly disagree. My company has a fairly complex web app that our customers use for data entry, and we chose a long time ago that we wouldn't guess at what a user means. For example, we have a fixed set of supported date formats they can submit, and anything else throws a syntax error. The reason for this is that it's much better for all involved to set standards for acceptable input and then stick by them than try to act on any weird bit of data sent our way.
Frankly, I would treat a password
One of our senior techs (yes, feel free to laugh, I know I do!) came to tell me he had a virus on his laptop. His cursor was runnign wild, an dplenty of windows kept popping open and apps being launched. He could not figure why, so his best guess was "a really bad virus."
From personal experience, 97% of people who guess "It must be a virus!" have no virus whatsoever (the reverse is also true - 97% of viral issues ar edismissed as "something weird is going on and I don't know why") so I assumed it surely wasn't one. I had him unplug his wireless mouse bluetooth dongle, which ended the problem immediately, so it was clear where the problem was coming from. I guessed bad drivers, and suggested he reinstall. Putting them fresh from the driver disk simply returned the issue.
The following day, while looking for a spare power supply, we stumbled on the answer. The wireless keyboard that came with the mouse he was using had been carelessly thrown in there, with another keyboard on top, mashing down a large part of the wireless keyboard's keys. The laptop was just doing as it was told by the keyboard all along.
8 years ago I had a guy at our company come up to me and tell me he got an email from a girl that said "I love you." He then said, she attached a vbs file to the email and he spent the last 10 minutes trying to get the attachment to work. He said he double clicked on it, ran it from a command prompt and several other ways but couldn't get her "love" program to work for him.
The guy was an IT analyst.
In all fairness, most IT analysts don't know what behavior should be expected from an actual, live woman.
In all fairness, most IT analysts don't know what behavior should be expected from an actual, live woman.
As evidenced by the fact that you didn't know that this "real live woman" was a guy named Boris.
This actually happened to me. I was helping out a customer with some software I had written. I told her to download our latest version from our website and to save it to her desktop. At this time she replied. "Goddamnit, I'm not going to tell you this again! I don't have a desktop computer I have a laptop!". I had to place her on hold while I laughed my ass off.
I've done a bit of support for an electronics company that also made TVs. Back in 2007 one of their newest models was a decent 40" LCD tv, HD ready etc. and fairly cheap. We got a LOT of support calls on that one because of the design of the rear of the TV.
The TV had a physical on/off switch, but the designers had decided to "hide" it between the speaker and display enclosures on the back of it. It was clearly outlined on the diagram on page 5 of the manual, but still we had a ton of calls about this particular model, because people couldn't turn it on. And invariably about half of them would complain that they already hung it on the wall and couldn't reach the bloody switch. Boo fucking hoo - read the manual before assembling your unit.
But - I had one phone call about this TV that still has me smiling ear to ear
Me: "[$Company] support, you're talking to Martin"
Very timid, baby girl voice: "Hiiiiiiii?"
Me: "Ehh
Very timid, baby girl voice: "My name is Pia"
Me: "Hello Pia."
Pia: "I'm four years old!"
Me: "Is your mom or dad around?"
Pia: "My daddy doesn't know how to turn on his TV"
At this point I simply couldn't help but laugh out loud. Then I hear a grown up female voice in the background
Mom: "Just go ahead and laugh, that's what we've been doing all day long"
Me: "Okay, can your dad hear me Pia?"
Pia: "He says he can"
And then I proceded to guide him to where this switch was.
It's one thing to be a stupid user, it's another thing entirely to know that there's something you don't know - at least that's what Socrates [wikipedia.org] believed.
The TV had a physical on/off switch, but the designers had decided to "hide" it between the speaker and display enclosures on the back of it.
And invariably about half of them would complain that they already hung it on the wall and couldn't reach the bloody switch. Boo f*ing hoo - read the manual before assembling your unit.
How is that the customer's fault? Yeah, it would have been good if they had read the instructions, but people miss instructions. And, seriously, a TV shouldn't really *require* instructions. It's a pretty simple device.
It sounds to me that bad design was at fault here (as the first quote indicates). The fact that many people had to call and ask about it only demonstrate this.
A long time ago, I had just configured qmail on a server and was monitoring the "alias" mailbox where "postmaster@domain" ends up, and noticed that someone had replied to the unknown user error message, which reads something like:
Hi, this is the qmail-daemon program at domainname. I tried to deliver your message to username, but couldn't find the destination.
Sorry it didn't work out.
The lady responded very politely Dear Mr Qmail Daemon,..., asking if it had any idea where she could reach her friend.
This article reeks of being written by low-level tech support who think they know more about computers than they actually do.
Obviously antivirus software isn't going to blow an electrical fuse. Obviously the user who thought he'd found a virus in a specific chip on his motherboard was a bit off. A DVD-ROM drive with infected firmware seems unlikely but is certainly within the realm of possibility. The rest are all perfectly plausible.
Someone with a rootkit popping open notepad remotely and typing a message? Viruses that change system sounds? How are those symptoms at all a reason to immediately dismiss the reports?
If there's one thing that grates on my nerves, it's people who work in tech support and therefore think they know everything about computers.
I'd hate to see how the people who wrote this article would respond to a report of the symptoms of a trojan horse/rootkit that I saw firsthand this last weekend. It intercepted all communication with Google (and Yahoo Search) and replaced the first page of results with spam/malware site links. In any browser used on the system, not just IE. MalwareBytes and Avast detected nothing - I had to boot off of a CD and manually move the files somewhere else before Avast detected some (but not all) of them as part of a rootkit.
A DVD-ROM drive with infected firmware seems unlikely but is certainly within the realm of possibility.
And more likely if the user was seeking firmware to made the drive region-free. I've wondered about the viability of such an exploit and whether it could do more than just inject virus code into a data stream read from a DVD or onto a DVD being burned. If it were master or slave on the same ATA cable as a second drive, could it not also alter the data written to or read from that hard drive?
Wasn't there also an old story (GHWB-era?) about the US using trojaned network printers to tap the LAN of a foreign mi
Every time I tell this story, I get looked at like I am lying through my teeth, but I remind them that this happened back in 1998, when Windows 3.11 was still being used, the 56k modem standard was still being written, and outside of a private T1, an ISDN line was your best bet for a fast connection to the Internet.
I was working Tier 1 Tech Support for a Chicago based ISP and a customer called up saying he was having problems getting onto the Internet. I confirm that he is on Windows 95, and having memorized the steps needed to get his computer configured to connect to us, I start walking him through the process. One of the final steps is to reboot Windows for the settings to take hold.
The computer shuts down without issue and starts the power-up cycle when I hear the CD Drive, a strange liquid sound, and immediately hear the sound of frying electronics and the customer swearing like a sailor on shore leave. Turns out, they had an in-house conference in the office that day and they were serving coffee in those paper cones. Since he could not find a holder for it, he opened up his CD tray and rested the coffee in the center void. When the computer rebooted, it closed said CD tray... ingesting the paper cone and the coffee, frying it into uselessness.
Needless to say, he was quite pissed and I was laughing my arse off for days.
I.T. Support for local government isn't as bad as doing AOL support, but some days you really couldn't tell the difference. Now, I'm not making fun of these people - a lot of them were born and raised when computers were not mainstream. For the non-geek, it's natural to be afraid to work with something that you have never used. My relatives are always afraid of hitting the wrong button on the computer and "breaking it", and I have to always reassure them that you really cannot break anything. And if they did, so what? They learn something new, and almost anything can be undone or fixed.
Anyway, my former coworker (I have long since left the position), who had been doing support work as an analyst for years, told me of one story that even I couldn't help laugh at. Some lady from admin called him up frantically panicking because her mouse had reached the end of the mouse pad and she hadn't reached the part of the screen where she wanted the pointer to be. Basically, she thought that once the mouse reached the end of the mouse pad, then game over, and you cannot go any further.
He carefully explained to her that she was allowed to lift the mouse up and move it back towards the center of the mouse pad and continue in the direction she wanted to go.
My first action is always to help people and not make them feel stupid, especially since they already feel embarrassed, but every once in a while, I just wish I could let myself mess with them, and be like "YOU DID WHAT!?!? OH NO, IT'S ALL BROKEN. YOU BROKE THE INTERNET!!" if they ask about moving the mouse around, or clicking on an icon on the screen that they know nothing about. I would never do that, but the thoughts are tempting.
I once worked IT for a company in Miami. One day I was sitting in the data center checking tape status. The super-high priced consultant admin walked in. She sat down in front of a Sun E6500 serial console, logged in, then started doing some work. After a few minutes, she got up, turned off the console, then started to leave. For non-Sun folks, turning off the main console shuts down the machine. I immediately asked, "What did you just do!?" She looked at me and told me she was pushing some NIS files. "You turned off the machine," I said. She looked at me like I was an idiot. "No, I just turned off the terminal."
The short story is that she normally connected from a terminal at her desk. This time she connected from the main console. It took another couple hours to fix what she'd screwed up.. All the while she was insisting that turning off the console wouldn't shutdown the machine.
The central computer unit of my university has become populated by less clueful individuals lately. This summer they decided it was a good idea to move mail handling over to Windows computers running Exchange or whatever they call it. One of the consequences was that spam filtering did not work very well anymore, especially for one professor at my division who was suddenly getting unheard-of amounts of spam. So this day, he came into office checked his correspondance and burst out in the corridor, shouting "Gah, 8000 mails!". Poor soul, I doubt he ever found the real ones in that pile.
I think I know where spam comes from now - Microsoft Exchange.
On night at about 2am, I received a call from one of our field technicians. Quite distraught, he told me his computer was broken and he had a high-profile job in the morning and needed it replaced ASAP. He explained that when he tried to type in his username to login, it was showing garbage on the screen, "all sorts of weird numbers and symbols". He regaled me with the story of how he had taken the laptop apart, checked the contacts on the keyboard ribbon cable, found his keyboard chipset model, and Googled the problem, eventually finding it to be a common issue known as a "K9 Keyboard Chipset error". This guy had done his homework.
Having no way of getting his laptop replaced so quickly by myself, I was forced to call the desktop support manager (who was the epitome of a BOFH). He groggily answered, and the technician told him the issue.
"Do me a favor," said the BOFH.
"OK?" the technician responded.
"Hold down the shift key, and press the Num Lock key. Then login."
"Gentlemen, we will discuss this on Monday," growled the BOFH, before slamming the phone down. Those words are to this day etched in my mind. I don't blame him for being angry, but in my defense, the tech *did* sound like he'd already tried everything. From then on, I became known as NumLock PantsDown. I'll tell Slashdot about the "PantsDown" portion another time.
Before my current job (writing software and supporting software developers for the MFP industry), I did "connectivity support" for the same company. I didn't deal with end users, I dealt with technicians. Many of these guys however were NOT IT techs, the vast majority were old curmudgeony copier techs that were a bit hesitant to enter the wonderful world of connected copiers (keeping in mind this was several years back, and I did deal with small dealerships' techs as well as our branch staff). As such, I have quite a few wonderful tales from my time on the other end of the phone/email/escalation system. Some names of people and companies altered to protect the guilty (but yes, my name is Ben, and I do work for Konica Minolta).
Story 1) The magical wireless RJ45 socket.
*Ring ring*, *ring ring*
Me: "Konica Minolta, Ben speaking."
John: "Hi Ben, it's John from Small Rural Copier Company here. I just hooked up a second hand Di251 at a customer and they said they want it connected to their PC to print. So, we sold them the Pi3502 (print controller), but it's not printing, what could be the problem?"
Me: "I'm gonna need a bit more info John. You've installed the controller and the NIC, and plugged everything in right?"
John: "Yep, I even set an 'IP Address' and installed the 'print driver' like the setup instructions said!"
Me: "Okay, good start. Tell me happens when you try to print."
John: "Nothing at all. The customer opens a document, selects to print it, and after a while it just says it failed to print"
Me: "Right, the most likely cause then is just that it can't communicate for some reason. Can you ping the MFP from the PC?"
John asks how to do that, and I talk him through it
John: "Nope, it says no reply."
Me: "Okay, tell me the IP address of the Pi3502 and the computer."
John does so, and I'm actually a little stunned that they're actually valid, on the same subnet, and everything sounded like it should be okay.
Me: "Hmmm... this might be a faulty NIC in the Pi3502, since we've seen a couple of those on this model, and it is second hand. Could you check if the link light is on?"
John: "Sure, where do I find the link light?"
Me: "The NIC has two LEDs - right on top of where the ethernet cable is plugged in, one should flash from time to time and the other should be on permanently - that's the link light."
John: "Ethernet cable? Is that the blue one that was in the box? I didn't know what to do with that, so I haven't done anything with it, it's still in the box."
Me: "... so, just to get this straight... what cables are currently connected to the Di251?"
John: "Just the power cable."
I then explained the 'finer points' of the concept of networking to John, who eventually became enlightened as to the purpose of an ethernet cable, and managed to get everything working about 10 minutes later
Story 2) How to scan.
*Ring ring*, *ring ring*
Me: "Konica Minolta, Ben speaking."
Peter: "Hi Ben, it's Peter from Moderately Sized City Dealership here. I've never set up scanning before, but the customer wants to use the 'Scan to FTP' function. Can you talk me through setting that up?"
Me: [stifling a groan] "Sure Peter. Do you have the details of the customer's FTP server?"
Peter: "Server? They don't have one of those. Do they need that for scanning?"
Me: "If you want to scan to FTP, you need an FTP server. They could install one on a desktop PC if they don't have a dedicated server though. Talk to their admin and ask if they'll install one somewhere for scanning. There's one on the CD that came with the MFP if they don't have a preference, and I can talk you through the setup of that" (The one on the CD was basically a dead simple little "write only" FTP server specifically designed with scanning in min
I had a user once who was a woman in her mid 50s. Most of her job duties were performed on the computer, so she could get around a little bit (a lot perhaps, considering that she got fired for spending upwards of 10-20 hours per week playing solitaire and shopping online).
Anyhow, she calls me up one day and says that something is wrong with her computer: "It says CHECK SIGNAL CABLE in big red letters!"
So I wander on down and sure enough, the monitor reads CHECK SIGNAL CABLE. Recognizing that the message was from the monitor itself, I started poking around at the back of the machine trying to see if anything was disconnected. After about five minutes and a big self-slap on the forehead I asked, "ummm...is your computer on?"
"Well of course it's on, it says CHECK SIGNAL CABLE."
"Yeah, but I mean the computer itself. You know, the "tower", or the "CPU", or the "hard drive", or whatever you happen to call it." (I wasn't really so snippy)
She suddenly realized what I was talking about, and she proceeded to turn her computer on. We had a good laugh about it and I went back to my hole.
About a week later I get another call: "Something is wrong with my computer. It says CHECK SIGNAL CABLE."
I was speechless at first, and almost thought she was joking. After a moment I calmly asked her if she had turned her actual "computer" on, and not just the monitor. She gave an embarrassed laugh and made some apologies and I told her not to worry about it, everybody "has those days."
Maybe a week or two later I get another call from the same lady: "Something is wrong with my computer, it says CHECK.... oh wait, nevermind."
I hung up the phone and took a moment to reflect on how fragile reality can be.
A week or two later I happen to be walking past this lady's desk and one of the guys from our engineering department is looking at the back of her computer and pulling on wires and whatnot. Being a bit dumbfounded I just decided to keep walking on by.
A few hours later I caught up with the guy from engineering and asked him what was up. Sure enough, the lady had forgotten once again to turn her computer on. What really gets me though is that she called this other guy from a completely different department because she *knew* that calling me would somehow lead to embarrassment. And while she could remember this potential for embarrassment, she could not remember that the solution to this particular problem was to simply turn her computer on.
Anyhow, that's my favorite story. Maybe you had to be there. A close second was when a much younger and more savvy woman called me to fix her mouse which was "too slow". Before I was able to get into the mouse properties in Windows and adjust the speed, she insisted on explaining her hypothesis that this particular mouse was slow because it's cord was very long.
Which brings up an interesting reality. I bet that a large number of the support calls I get are solved by having people re-adjust the location of their wireless mouse receiver, which is rarely described as "my mouse isn't working right" but more often "my computer (or 'the internet') is slow, I have to click on things ten times before they open."
Another large number of calls are solved by having people shake the crap out of their keyboards... a stuck ALT or CTRL key can be hard to diagnose the first time.
Tale #1: Years ago, I owned a tape backup drive with a few extra tapes that I used to make periodic system backups. A friend of mine had a virus infection on his system. He was going to send it to a repair house that was famous for formatting and reinstalling Windows at the slightest hint of a problem. I offered to lend him my drive and a spare tape to backup his data. My father tried to stop me from doing that because, in his opinion, the virus would infect the tape drive hardware and then infect our system. No matter how many times I argued with him about how that was impossible, he insisted that it would happen and he knew better than me. (This from the guy who asked me how to copy files from one disk to another one. "Drag the files to a folder on your desktop. Now put in the second disk. Now drag the files to that disk." "You're a genius!!!")
Tale #2: We had launched a system allowing users to book appointments online. About 10 months after launch, everything was running smoothly when I got a call from a user claiming that our page wouldn't accept her e-mail address. I checked the obvious things (AOL user? Yes. Putting in "@aol.com"? Yes.) and was just firing up the code to check for some weird edge case triggered by her request when she asked: "Do I need to put my e-mail address in the box that says e-mail address?" No you don't. I employ Psychic Programming. Just look at your screen and think about your appointment and it'll book it for you. If it doesn't book, it's because you're not staring hard enough. *rolling eyes*
Tale #3: I got an e-mail from someone reporting a problem. I asked them to send me a screenshot. They replied that they would if I could just send them my e-mail address. Um... If you don't have my e-mail address... how did you JUST E-MAIL ME?!!!!!!! (She explained that she didn't know how to attach a file to a reply but knew how to attach one to a new message. I still don't get it, though, as the actions are completely identical.)
I'm just glad that Tech Support isn't my main job.
I once had a user call because her computer wouldn't boot. I ended up pulling the hard disk and putting it in another machine so I could recover some of her files. When I looked at it, I noticed a bunch of folders on the root of the disk with three letter names: DLL, EXE, INI, SYS, BAT, etc...
The really impressive part is that she had actually managed to move most of the system into these before hitting the files that were in use.
Air is water with holes in it.


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Want to remind yourself or a friend about this program? Fill out this simple form and klru will email you a reminder on the day that it will air.
Dubrovnik And Balkan Side-trips
series: Rick Steves' Europe
air date: 10/21/13 12:30 AM
Nestled inside its mighty ramparts is Dubrovnik, the "Pearl of the Adriatic." From this remarkably preserved medieval fortress city, we venture into less-touristed corners of the former Yugoslavia. In Bosnia, we visit Mostar - war-torn in the 90s, but bursting with promise today. In Montenegro, we sail the fjord-like Bay of Kotor and explore its mysterious, mountainous interior.
WARNING: Email reminders for this program have already been sent out. Your reminder may not reach the intended address in time for this program's airing.
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subset: commoncrawl


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Company Profile
Ranger Up is the premium military brand in the world with accounts on every continent but Antarctica (but we're working on it). In 2007, we launched a Patriotic Brand named Unapologetically American. In 2008, we launched what is now the largest military blog: The Rhino Den. In 2011, we launched the first American Rugby Brand: American Sin Bin. In 2012, we launched a largely inappropriate military cartoon known called The Damn Few as well as a new Vetrepreneurial initiative to give back to our community and build a new generation of military entrepreneurs. We are founded, owned, and operated by military veterans. We do not operate a politically correct work environment. We are huge fans of the Constitution, MMA, Rugby, awesome art and bacon.


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Vanport Room 338, Smith Memorial Student Union, 1875 SW Broadway
In this talk, Mark LeVine, Professor of History at University of California, Irvine, will explore the role of music in the genesis and subsequent dynamics of the Arab Uprisings. He will explore how the years leading up to the uprisings saw musical subcultures develop into countercultures and ultimately revolutionary cultures that provided aesthetic background to the protests and revolts. Levine will discuss the role of new technologies for the uncommodified production and distribution of music on the 'return of the aura' to music, and how artists attempt to continue writing music that can inspire and mobilize people in the streets after the initial mass protest phase of the uprisings is over and the grind of daily struggle for the core goals of the revolutions resume.
Mark LeVine is Professor of modern Middle Eastern history at University of California, Irvine and Distinguished Visiting Professor at the Cente for Middle Eastern Studies at Lund University in Sweden. He is the author and editor of 10 books, including most recently Heavy Metal Islam (Random House 2008), Struggle and Survival in Palestine/Israel (UC Press, 2005), Islam and Popular Culture (forthcoming) and The Five Year Old Who Toppled a Pharaoh (UC Press, forthcoming).
Presented as a part of the Middle East Studies Center's 2013 Summer Institute for Educators: The Arab Uprisings
The Middle East Studies Center at Portland State University promotes understanding of the people, cultures, languages and religions of the Middle East. As a National Resource Center for Middle East Studies under the U.S. Department of Education's Title VI program, the Center serves as a resource on issues pertaining to the Middle East through activities that reach students and scholars, as well as businesses, educators, and the media. The Middle East Studies Center supports academic conferences, workshops, cultural events, lectures, and a resource library.
pdx.edu/middle-east-studies | email@example.com | 503-725-4074


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Coming Back with Wes Moore
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In this three episode series, executive producer by best-selling author and U.S. army veteran Wes Moore, tells the story of his search for answers to some of the most difficult questions facing veterans returning from war. Moore's journey, spurred by the suicide of one of his oldest friends and a fellow officer, takes him into the personal lives of different soldiers as they attempt to reintegrate into society, establish new identities and – for many – find a new mission.
Coming Back with Wes Moore
May 13 - 27, 2014
Tuesdays at 7pm on PBS North
Each episode focuses on a different stage of coming home: "Coming Back," "Fitting In" and "Moving Forward."


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PacRep's SoDA program presents "Isak Dineson: Stories From 'Out of Africa' and More." 2p.m. Sunday, Jan. 20, and 7:30p.m. Monday, Jan. 21, at the Indoor Forest Theatre, Santa Rita and Mountain View, Carmel. Features the work of Isak Dineson, author of "Out of Africa." In addition to excerpts from this well-known biographical work, the program presents selections from her stories and letters, as well as moments in the life of this remarkable writer. Three local actresses — Julie Hughett, Susan Keenan and Anne Mitchell — will portray Dineson. Free; donations welcome to support SoDA scholarship fund. www.schoolofdramaticarts.org.
The Paper Wing Theatre Company presents "Avenue Q." Continues at 8p.m. Fri-Sat through Jan. 19 at the Paper Wing Theater, 320 Hoffman Ave., Monterey. Winner of the Tony "triple crown" for Best Musical, Best Score and Best Book, written by Robert Lopez, Jeff Whitty and Jeff Marx, "Avenue Q" is part flesh, part felt and packed with heart. Features Nicholas Kelly as Princeton, Mindy Kruty as Kate Monster, Jay DeVine as Nicky, Michael T. Aliman as Rod, Jared Hussey as Brian, Kate Faber as Christmas Eve and Kayla Ciudad as Gary Coleman, directed by Koly McBride. $25 general, $22 seniors, students and military, available at www.PaperWing.com. 905-5684.
Paper Wing Theatre presents Jason Robert Brown's "The Last Five Years." Opens at 8p.m. Friday, Jan. 25; continues at 8p.m. Fri-Sat through Feb. 9 at the intimate Gallerie Theatre at Paper Wing Theatre, 320 Hoffman Ave., Monterey. The play explores a five-year relationship between Jamie Wellerstein, a rising novelist, and Cathy Hyatt, a struggling actress. Cathy's story is told in reverse chronological order (beginning the show at the end of the marriage) and Jamie's is told in chronological order. Features Nicholas Kelly and Devon Moody- McSherry, directed and musical direction by Eric N. Johnson. Reservations at 905-5684. www.PaperWing.com.·JAN.25-FEB. 16
Stardust Playhouse presents "Parallel Lives" by Kathy Najimy and Mo Gaffney. Opens at 8p.m. Friday, Jan. 25; continues at 8p.m. Fri-Sat through Feb. 16 at Stardust Playhouse, 2115 N. Fremont St., Suite C, Monterey. Directed by Judie Swartz and featuring Carolyn Janis and Renee Ladle Infelise. With boundless humor, "Parallel Lives" re-examines the ongoing quest to find parity and love in a contest handicapped by capricious gods — or in this case, goddesses. For mature audiences. $15, available at stardustplayouse.com and 402-8940.
PacRep Theatre's SoDAonStage program presents "Legally Blonde The Musical." Two discount previews at 7:30p.m. Thursday, Jan. 31, and Friday, Feb. 1; opens at 7:30p.m. Saturday, Feb. 2; continues at 7:30p.m. Fridays and Saturdays and 2p.m. Sundays through March 3, at the Golden Bough Theatre, Monte Verde between Eighth and Ninth avenues, Carmel. Features Sydney Duncheon as "Elle Woods," 40 performers, two canine performers, and a live rock band under the direction of guitarist Don Dally. Directed by Stephen Moorer, choreography by Lara Wheeler Devlin. General admission single tickets from $7.50 to $28; discounts for seniors over 65, students, children, teachers and active military, available at 622-0100, online at www.PacRep.org or at PacRep Box Office, 11a.m.-4p.m. Tue-Sat. "Two for One" discount on general admission available for Thursday night performances.
Auditions for Stardust Playhouse production of Annie Baker's "Circle Mirror Transformation." Noon-3p.m. Saturday, Jan. 19, and Sunday, Jan. 20, at the Stardust Playhouse 2115 N. Fremont St., Monterey. Needed: one man in 50s-60s; one man in 30s-40s; one woman in teens, early-20s; one woman in her 30s. Directed by Renee Ladle Infelise.402-8940.
MPC Theatre Company auditions for "Les Miserables." Directed by Gary Bolen, vocal direction by Barney Hulse, musical direction by Dr. John Anderson, choreography by Susan Cable. Show dates: Thu-Sun, July 25-Aug. 18. Needed: five principal men plus 10-15 featured and chorus; four principal women, plus 10-15 featured and chorus; two girls (Young Cosette and Young Eponine, ideally age 12 and older to play younger); one boy (Gavroche, ideally age 12 or older to play younger). All must be strong singers and actors (no non-singing roles) and be able to move well. Auditioners should prepare a song in the style of the show that strongly features your range. Auditions: 10a.m.-1p.m. and 2-5p.m. Saturday, Jan. 26, and 1-5p.m. Sunday, Jan. 27, in the MPC Music Hall and Choral Room, 980 Fremont St., Monterey. Auditions are by appointment only, email Gary Bolen at firstname.lastname@example.com. No phone calls or Facebook posts. www.mpctheatre.com.
Monterey Public Library presents Howard Burnham's "Dearest Jane." At 7p.m. Tuesday, Feb. 5, in the Library Community Room, Monterey Public Library, 625 Pacific St., Monterey. A one-man show written and performed by Howard Burnham celebrating the 200th anniversary of the publication of Jane Austen's enduring classic "Pride and Prejudice." For ages 16-up. Free, but reservations required at 646-3949 or by email, firstname.lastname@example.com.
Registration for the 2013 Spring Conservatory open. Programs within each Conservatory vary by minimum age for participation and complexity of material. "Charlotte's Web," with performance opportunities for those 6-17, begins March 19. Registration is open through the first scheduled rehearsal or until programs are full. Rehearsals take place at the Karen Wilson Children's Theatre, 320 Main St., Oldtown Salinas. For more information call ARIEL Theatrical at 775-0976 or www.arieltheatrical.org.
Monterey Recreation Dept.Theater for Kids 3-3:45p.m. Fridays for two six-week sessions, Jan. 11-Feb. 15 and April 5-May 10, for ages 5-7, at the Hilltop Park Center, 871 Jessie Street, Monterey. Instructor Maria Dawson. $78, $60 for Monterey residents. Pre-register at the Monterey Recreation Office, 546 Dutra St., Monterey. 646-3866, www.monterey.org/rec.
The Western Stage seeks volunteers in its technical and front-of-house departments. Call 755-6988 or 755-6981, or see wwww.westernstage.com.
PacRep's School of Dramatic Arts (SoDA) after-school theater classes. For ages 4 through high school, offering acting, singing, dance and performance opportunities. Classes held at the Indoor Forest Theater in Carmel. www.SchoolOfDramaticArts.org. Gracie Poletti, SoDA program director, 622-9175.
MPC Theatre Company is seeking volunteers. Needed: ushers, ticket-takers and concessionaires. In addition to performance-night volunteers, the company is seeking people to distribute fliers and promotional materials throughout the Peninsula. All volunteers receive complimentary tickets to MPC Theatre Company productions. 646-4213 or email@example.com. · ONGOING
Paper Wing Theatre looking for actors interested in auditioning. The Paper Wing Theatre Company, located at 320 Hoffman Ave. at Lighthouse in New Monterey, is looking for actors interested in auditioning, with no experience necessary. Call 521-4512 to make an appointment (leave a message if there is no answer). PaperWingTheatreCo.com.
Hartnell College Theatre Arts Department is accepting students for its series of workshops and classes. Whether you are new to theater or a seasoned performer, there are opportunities to develop skills under the guidance of professional actors and directors. For ages 9-13. 755-6987, 755-6988, www.westernstage.org.


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"iBooks Author is a great tool for creating interactive ebooks. Unfortunately, creating content with iBooks Author isn't always as easy as you might hope it is. Back in June I shared a free 110 page book about using iBooks Author http://www.freetech4teachers.com/2012/06/free-110-page-guide-to-publishing-with.html . However, if video tutorials are more helpful to you I have found twenty six videos that you should look at."
Scooped by
John Evans
onto iPads, MakerEd and More in Education


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Empty vessels make the most noise
This page is about the saying "Empty vessels make the most noise"
Possible meaning:
Stupid people speak loudest.
vessel (noun): a container such as a bowl, usually for holding liquids | If you strike (hit) a full container it makes less noise than if you strike an empty one.
Quick Quiz
"Empty vessels make the most noise" is a saying that really refers to
Contributor: Josef Essberger


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Not much is known about Microsoft's next Xbox, codenamed Durango. It's been long-rumored to use AMD chips for both its CPU and GPU--a point that's been repeated by financial news service Bloomberg. Speaking to an anonymous source, Bloomberg reports that the next Xbox will use a variant of AMD Jaguar technology, and that the switch to x86 architecture (much like PS4) will mean "game discs made for the current Xbox 360 won't be compatible."
Sony's switch to x86 means that PS4 won't be able to play PS3 games either, although it plans on using Gaikai tech in some way to help in the transition.
Although Microsoft has yet to officially talk about the next Xbox--except to apologize over comments about the system being "always online"--The Verge claims that Microsoft is planning a reveal event for May 21st. What The Tech also reiterated that date, whilst also throwing some more tidbits into the rumor mill. BlockheadBrown has a quick summary in Chatty.


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Measuring Materialism in Children's Books
Senior's thesis aims critical eye at kids' lit
- 04-17-2013
- By Jon Reidel
Rachel Franz has read more than her share of books to young children growing up next to a daycare center, babysitting neighborhood children and working as a nanny. It didn't take long for the environmental studies major to notice a disturbing trend: continual reinforcement of materialistic behavior and consumerism.
Born out of concern for the children under her care and the picture books she was reading them, Franz decided to write her senior thesis on the subject with one primary question in mind: "How do children's picture books potentially deter or reinforce materialistic values and consumer culture?" She revealed her findings – among the first to focus on the role of children's literature in shaping material and consumer values – in her 196-page Honors College senior thesis, "Cultivating Little Consumers: How Picture Books Influence Materialism in Children."
"I read three or four books a night as a babysitter and started noticing how much greed there was in children's books and became deeply concerned," says Franz, who is double-minoring in studio arts and green building and community design. "I realized how damaging consumerism is to the environment and tied that to my love of children. This study was an attempt to reconcile the two."
Franz, who based her results on a content analysis of 30 picture books written between 1998 and 2012 from a list of Caldecott Medal Winners, New York Times bestsellers and librarian recommended books, found that picture books reflect, reinforce, and deter consumerism simultaneously with environmental messages serving as the most frequent way to counter consumerism. In the study, a number of picture books featured excessive amounts of toys, sending pro-consumer messages to children ages zero to six while others contained more outdoor-related themes that Franz says serve as a tool for countering consumerism.
Franz will be among more than 300 students presenting their research at the 2013 Student Research Conference on Tuesday, April 23 from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. in the Davis Center.
"The results of this study reveal that picture books have a significant potential to act as both an avenue for becoming consumers and a tool for countering consumerism" says Franz, who has a professional certificate in sustainable business practices from UVM. "In order to help children to become positive, connected, responsible individuals, we must improve the quality and consciousness of the media and their ability to respond to it. Picture books, whose tradition is to inspire imagination and offer refuge, are a fantastic place to start. I know I'll never read a book the same way again."
Coding consumerism
Franz, who cited a study showing a decrease in the number of interactions with the outdoors is resulting in "nature deficit disorder," created a comprehensive and unique coding system that identified 50 indicators across 10 categories representing different ways in which picture books can promote and discourage the consumer socialization of readers. Text and illustrations were coded to measure the occurrence of indicators of consumerism or counter-consumerism across five themes: individual material orientation, interpersonal material orientation, social norms, commercialization and environmental messages.
Some of the 37 pro-consumer indicators included "desire for more stuff," "material goods as a vehicle for approval/gaining friends" and "focus on objects instead of peers in social setting." Among the 13 counter-consumer indicators were "self-acceptance," "sharing," and "positive orientation to the outdoors/inspiration." Overall, the average book contained 5.34 indicators of pro and counter-consumerism. The most frequent number of instances among counter-consumer indicators were "outdoor engagement" and "creative/imaginative engagement," while "standard of living: above average" and "engagement with toys/games" topped the pro-consumer indicators.
The Pete the Cat books, for example, included pro-consumer indicators by showing Pete with a nice car, an expensive guitar, surfboards, and a significant number of toys located in an above-average home. Conversely, "nature immersion" ranked high due to the fact that "outdoor engagement" was found in 76.7 percent of the sample (23 of 30 books), with characters playing on playgrounds, skateboarding, biking or playing in the sand at the beach. Many characters go on walks, while others describe a "more emotional engagement in their natural surroundings" like feeling the wind, smelling the air or imagining riding a bird across the landscape in The Man Who Walked Between the Towers.
"Rachel took on an ambitious capstone research project that required great persistence in the design phase," says Stephanie Kaza, Franz's adviser and director of the Environmental Program. "Her thoughtful and meticulous analysis reveals important findings on the specific nature of consumer messages in children's literature. Perhaps her greatest triumph was sticking it out through the many challenging phases of such a major piece of independent work."
Putting research into practice
Franz is hoping scholars, parents, caregivers and educators use the information to offset other consumer drivers like television, video games and social media. She also hopes her research, which identifies leverage points for shaping consumerism through more careful selection of children's picture books, is expanded to include classic books to examine how these values have changed over time.
"Most books, like our lives, have a combination of both messages," says Franz, who has worked as an executive assistant at a design firm during college. "Parents are the number one source for countering consumerism. I'm hoping this study encourages people to develop critical thinking skills around consumerism and to select books more carefully."


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With so many referendums and what not on the ballots across many states, this is one that got surprisingly little attention.
Puerto Rico passed a referendum to vote for statehood which now gets put in Congress' hands.
If it actually does pass through both houses, that will shake up the Legislative branch with 2 new senators and 5 congresspeople (population is about 3.7 million people near Oregon and Connecticut). Not sure how exactly they would vote political party wise. It would make for an interesting dynamic especially with a big majority of the people there speak only Spanish.
Puerto Ricans opt for statehood in referendum


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With a simple photo, Beyonce has told her version of the beloved children's tale "Goldilocks and the Three Bears."
You know, the urban, modern-day Instagram version.
The "Standing on the Sun" pop diva, 31, shared an adorable photo Wednesday with no caption and not even a glimpse of herself or her family, but the pic got more than 601,000 likes within 24 hours.
PHOTOS: Beyonce and Jay Z through the years
The snapshot simply showed her little family's shoes du jour: Timberlands, specifically the ubiquitous tan lace-up work boot and its many variatons.
Three, to be exact.
Jay Z's are big (flat and manly), Beyonce's are high-heeled (natch) and their baby girl Blue Ivy's Tims are just right. And by right, we mean teeny-tiny and adorable.
Because, come on, what's cuter than baby footwear??
Rapper Jay Z was spotted leaving Gjelina in Venice this week wearing the brand's 6-inch basic waterpoof boot too.
And honestly, we prefer to "heart" photos like this (or family photos or inspirational handwritten notes or day in the life of Bey snaps) more than videos that showcase — ahem — golden fangs.
Randy Travis leaves hospital for physical therapy-facility
'Full House' alum Jodie Sweetin insists she's not in rehab
Jennifer Aniston talks nudism, Katie Couric on 'Chelsea Lately'
Follow Ministry of Gossip @LATcelebs.
PHOTOS: Celebrity portraits by The Times
PHOTOS: Royal visit to New Zealand and Australia
PHOTOS: 2013 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show


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Oscar Pistorius: Court Transcript
Bulls enter administration
Bradford have gone into administration after failing to find new investment and now have just 10 days to avoid being liquidated.
FA hits out at Twitter attacks
Twitter attacks on Ashley Young and Ashley Cole have been branded as "appalling and unacceptable".
Hodgson to turn to youth
Roy Hodgson admits he is plotting an England 'revolution', with it his desire to see a number of promising youngsters drafted into the senior camp.


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Gallery: Famous Fashion Plagiarists
Did you read that article about the magazine editor (Judith Griggs) who stole a blogger's article for her magazine? And then when the blogger asked her what happened, and suggested a donation to her journalism school, Judith Griggs told her that the entire web was public domain, and that the blogger should pay her for editing it? And this exchange ended up on Gawker maybe five minute later? Jesus Christ, this is why print will die. Not because the web is public domain. Because the olds no longer understand how the world works.
Anyhow, I wanted to do a gallery called "Ways I Think Judith Griggs Should Get Told" (with finger snapping, without finger snapping, etc.) but we're a fashion and beauty website. So, in honor of her, here are some celebrities who have ripped off other celebrities' style.[ITPGallery]


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Jimmy Johnson used to spend hours reading mock drafts as part of his draft-day preparations. He used to say that some of the most accurate tidbits of information he got on what other teams were likely to do came from the beat writers that covered those teams.
And that's the reason he used to go so far as to call certain beat writers or journalists in various cities to pick their brains about their teams.
What follows is an wealth of information and opinion Johnson would love to have were he still making picks in this draft. Below you will find a mock draft compiled with the cooperation of two dozen beat writers and columnists that cover the NFL in the 32 NFL cities.
Every team's information is compiled by that team's beat writer or columnist, most of whom got on a conference call Tuesday and conducted a draft as if it were happening in real time.
This is the result. Some interesting things come out of this. Notice Percy Harvin is not picked in the first round. Notice the Dolphins have their choice of several outstanding players with the selection, made by me, perhaps surprising based on how this mock played out.
Anyway, won't keep you any longer. Have at it. And in the comments section, you tell me if the Dolphins would actually pick the player I picked based on his, shall we say, interesting sense of humor as seen in this youtube video below.
1. DETROIT: (8 picks, 2 in first, 2 in third, 2 in sixth.) Needs: QB, DT, OT/G, entire defense. Comment: Leos were last in the league in defense, 30th in rushing. As of today, they have narrowed choice to three players - Matthew Stafford, Jason Smith and Aaron Curry. Scott McEwen, protege of Ron Hughes in Pittsburgh, runs the college operation as he has in the past. Pick: Everything points to Stafford. Lions have one Pro Bowl appearance in the last 51 years by a QB, that being Greg Landry in 1971.
2. ST. LOUIS: (7 picks) Needs: OT, WR. Comment: Cut two seven-time Pro Bowlers in Orlando Pace and Torry Holt for cap reasons. Have lost 27 of last 32 games. No. 2 overall for second year in a row. It's down to 4 players: Matt Sanchez, Eugene Monroe, Jason Smith and Curry. They have just one bona fide OT on roster in Alex Barron. Donnie Avery is their most experienced WR on the roster (53 career catches). It won't be Sanchez. If they have a higher grade on Curry, they'll take him. PICK: Eugene Monroe, OT, Virginia.
3. KANSAS CITY: (7 picks; no second, 2 in seventh) Needs: Pass rusher, LB, Speed WR, OT. Comment: The Chiefs had just 10 sacks last year, will be going to some 3-4 so there's a LB need. They added Zach Thomas, Mike Vrabel and Monty Beisel to get them through this year at LB. PICK: OT Jason Smith, Baylor. If St. Louis goes Smith, they go Monroe.
4. SEATTLE: (10 picks, 4 in seventh) Needs: OLB, OT, QB, WR depth, S. Comment: LT Walter Jones is coming off microfracture surgery. QB Matt Hasselbeck missed nine games last year with a back injury. PICK: Aaron Curry, LB, Georgia Tech. Crabtree is an outside shot. 'Hawks like Jason Smith a bit better than Monroe.
5. CLEVELAND: (5 picks, 2 in 2nd, no 3rd, no 5th, no 7th) Needs: Pass rusher, 3-4 OLB, S, WR, RB. Comment: Mangini wants to overhaul the roster. He wants to trade and collect picks. We believe the Braylon Edwards trade will happen when they go on the clock on draft day. They will trade QB Brady Quinn if they can. The Browns are interested in Matt Sanchez, but the suspicion is they would trade down instead. The PICK: Mark Sanchez, QB, USC. The suspicion is they'll take the WR with the pick they get from the Edwards deal. But guessing Crabtree would not be crazy.
6. CINCINNATI: (11 picks, 2 3rds, 2 in 6th, 3 in 7th) Needs: OT, C, WR, RB depth, pass rusher. Comment: At OT, Levi Jones has been injury prone, Stacy Andrews lost in free agency. They are happy with Anthony Collins at OT. If both top tackles are gone, the PICK: Andre Smith, OT, Alabama. They had him in for a meeting a week ago. Brian Orakpo is a possibility. Michael Crabtree is possible.
7. OAKLAND: (5 picks; no fifth, no sixth) Needs: WR, OT, S. It's always about speed with the Raiders. They have nobody for Russell to throw to. They're happy with run game. PICK: Jeremy Maclin, WR, Missouri. Michael Crabtree, WR, Texas Tech. They may like Maclin and Hayward-Bey. Michael Huff is on the trade block, we think.
8. JACKSONVILLE: (9 picks; 3 in seventh). Needs: WR, DT, S, OT, 3rd CB. Comment: They got Torry Holt, but they're still hurting at WR. Dennis Northcutt and Mike Walker are their other two WRs. DT is a need since they dealt Marcus Stroud. Haven't been able to play the type of D they like – clog the middle. The plan is to take the best player available. PICK: B.J. Raji, DT, Boston College.
9. GREEN BAY: (9 picks; 2 in third, 2 in sixth). Needs: Going 3-4. Could use DE, LB, OT, RB, S, DB. Comment: GM Ted Thompson has traded down 13 times in his first four drafts. In this scenario, they would trade down. PICK: Michael Crabtree, WR, Texas Tech. Their current D-line is: Jolley-Pickett-Jenkins. So Raji or Tyson Jackson are perfect fits. Not sure how they feel about Oher. The other 3 tackles would fit. Malcolm Jenkins would be an outside shot.
10. SAN FRANCISCO: (9 picks, 2 in fifth, 2 in seventh). Needs: OT, edge rusher, WR. Comment: They're content to go with the QBs they have instead of taking one in the first round. They could use a RT. Singletary wants to go strictly to a 3-4 defense. PICK: Michael Oher, OT, Mississippi.
11. BUFFALO: (9 picks, 2 in first, 2 in fourth). Needs: DE, T, TE, LB. Comment:They can get a TE in the second round, and I can't see them taking Pettigrew this early. A wild card would be Cushing. PICK: Brian Orakpo, DE, Texas. If he's gone, take Robert Ayers or Aaron Maybin.
12. DENVER: (10 picks; 2 in first, 2 in third, 1 in fifth, 2 in seventh). Needs: Going 3-4 so NT, OLB, ILB, DE, WR. Comment: We're suspecting defense in the first round for sure. QB is the riddle. If they pick a QB, they've basically admitted they screwed up in trading Cutler. Can't see that. There might be some interest in Quinn. PICK: Tyson Jackson, DE, LSU. Shanahan ran 14 drafts, they have 3 No. 1s from those drafts and only 2 are starters – DJ Williams and Ryan Clady.
13. WASHINGTON: (5 picks; no second, no fourth). Needs: pass rusher, OLB, RT. Comment: After this, they don't pick again until No. 80. They traded second for Jason Taylor. Jason Campbell's contract is up after this year. They would want Sanchez. The would have taken Orakpo or Tyson Jackson. They like the So. Cal linebackers. They have a tendency to take big-school players from SEC. Larry English is possible, but he's from a small school. PICK: Larry English, DE, Northern Illinois. They're not big on Maybin. They would consider a trade-down here.
14. NEW ORLEANS: (4 picks; 1st, 2 fourths, 7th). Needs: S, DE, CB, RB. Comment: They run a standard 4-3, Maybin or E. Brown are outside candidates. PICK: Malcolm Jenkins, FS, Ohio State. If he fits at safety, that's fine with them.
15. HOUSTON: (8 picks; 2 in fourth) Needs: OLB, RB, FS are top three needs. Comment: They will try like crazy to trade back and take Matthews a bit later. PICK: Brian Cushing, LB, Southern Cal. It's Cushing or Matthews unless Jenkins were to fall.
16. SAN DIEGO: (8 picks, no 2nd, three in fourth). Needs: DE, ILB, ROLB, S. Comment: They would like to take Tyson Jackson, DE. If Jackson gone, PICK: Beanie Wells, RB, Ohio State. If Wells gone, take Rey Maualuga. If all three gone, pass. Just kidding. Knowshon Moreno. (Running back is more of a future need that could be addressed now if the right guy is there.)
17. N.Y. JETS: (6 picks; no fifth) Needs: WR, QB, DE, RB. Comment: Kellen Clemens and Brett Ratliff, are the current QBs. The value here is QB Josh Freeman of Kansas State. Pick: Freeman. Illinois CB Vontae Davis is possible.
18. DENVER: (from Chicago) (see picks above). Comment: They need defense. PICK: Clay MATTHEWS, OLB. Other option is Peria Jerry.
19. TAMPA BAY: (8 picks, no second, 3 sevenths) Needs: D-line, CB, WR. Comment: In total overhaul mode, new head coach, new GM, new coordinators, new QB, no Derrick Brooks. Jim Bates is veering from Tampa 2. PICK: Peria Jerry, DT, Mississippi.
20. DETROIT: (from Dallas) (See picks above). Needs: Defense. Comment: The Lions would take Jerry. Lions worst in NFL in rushing defense. Saints converted 11 straight third downs vs. them late last season. Horrible. PICK: Ziggy Hood, DT, Missouri.
21. PHILADELPHIA: (10 picks; no 4th. four in fifth, two in sixth). Needs: RB, Interior OL, TE, WR, DE. Comment: Already traded away a pick for Jason Peters of Buffalo. PICK: Knowshon Moreno, RB, Georgia. Brian Westrbook about to turn 30 has balky knee.
22. MINNESOTA: (6 picks; no 4th, no 6th, 2 in seventh). Needs: RT, WR, CB, DT, C. Comment: RT is Ryan Cook, second round in 2006. WR need a second guy. Winfield is over 30 at corner. Need more bodies there. QB – they seem to be content with Rosenfels and Travaris Jackson. They like all the OTs. PICK: Eben Britton, OT, Arizona, Also: Harvin or Haywood-Bey are possible.
23. NEW ENGLAND: (11 picks; 3 in second, 2 in third; 2 in sixth). Needs: More pass rush, S, CB, LB. Comments: Six picks in the first 97 as rich get richer. Belichick said it's the most flexibility he's ever had. Expect them to move up and down. Defense was 26th on third down. PICK: Robert Ayers, DE, Tennessee. Belichick loves the height weight guys. He also likes the UConn cornerback Darius Butler.
24. ATLANTA: (7 picks, 2 in fifth, no 7th). Needs: OLB, SS, TE, CB. The PICK: Brandon Pettigrew, TE Oklahoma State. They like Larry English. However, in this scenario, Aaron Maybin would be a strong consideration.
25. MIAMI: (9 picks; 2 in second, 2 in seventh). Needs: Starting CB, No. 1 WR, pass rushers. Comment: The Dolphins won't be afraid to take the best player available. CB Will Allen is one starter. They signed mediocre CB Eric Green; They do not have a No. 1 WR in their popgun offense. They want more pass-rush help for 32-year-old Joey Porter, who had 43 percent of their sacks. Everybody's talking about Virginia's LB Clint Sintim because he played with Al Groh, but he's a second-round pick. (If somebody real good falls - Clay Matthews, Rey Maualuga or even Moreno, they'll pick him based on value. Pick: Rey Maualuga, LB, USC. Second choice: Darius Butler, CB, UConn. Third choice: WR Hakeem Nicks. Fourth choice: WR Kenny Britt.
26. BALTIMORE: (6 picks, no 7th). Needs: TE, OT, WR, Comment: Must help young QB Joe Flacco and Cam Cameron will be crying for more help on offense. The PICK: Aaron Maybin, DE, Penn State. Visited them. They could use Pettigrew. Feel free to flip-flop Maybin to Atlanta and Pettigrew to Baltimore in this mock draft.
27. INDIANAPOLIS: (8 picks; 2 in fourth). Needs: WR, DT, OLB, RB, OT. Comment: Marvin Harrison is gone but may still be re-signed if Colts don't find a replacement in the draft. Oh, too bad, they do find a replacement. PICK: Darrius Hayward-Bey, WR, Maryland. A fallback pick would be: Brian Robiskie, WR, Ohio State.
28. BUFFALO: (from Carolina & Philly) (picks see above). PICK: Phil Loadholt, OT, Oklahoma. Fills need for a starting right tackle.
29. N.Y. GIANTS: (10 picks; 2 in second, 2 in third, 2 in fifth). Needs: WR, OT, MLB. Comment: Toomer cut, Plaxico Burress is gone. In this scenario, the PICK: Hakeem Nicks, WR, North Carolina. They checked out Kenny Britt, but he didn't have a great workout.
30. TENNESSEE: (10 picks, 2 in fourth, 2 in sixth, 2 in seventh). Needs: WR, CB, OLB, OT. Comment: Best player available is in play here. Pick: Kenny Britt, WR, Rutgers. A very good option for them would be CB Alphonso Smith. They would pass on Harvin due to off the field issues.
31. ARIZONA: (8 picks, 2 in 7th). Needs: RB, OLB, TE. Comment: Expected to release Edgerrin James, three of their OLBs are over 30 and have had injuries. They've been searching for a TE for 2 decades. PICK: Donald Brown, RB UConn. They're high on Larry English, think he's a great kid and a hard worker.
32. PITTSBURGH: (9 picks, 2 in fifth, 2 in seventh). Needs: OL depth, DL depth, CB depth. Comments: Steelers love picking here and would love to do it every year. PICK: DL Fili Moala, USC. Options are C Alex Mack or C Eric Wood.


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This is long, but well worth it for any Simpsons fan.
It's a loop of all of the family portraits throughout the years. Excellent. <insert Mr. Burns here>
Last edited by PlumberKhan; 06-01-2012 at 09:09 AM.
This one will piss off the Tebowites....
Lots of larfs in the thread but this one hits too close to home.
When the car crashed into our house, the impact threw me about 10 feet. My husband was trapped at first by the car and was inches from having an oak tree trunk through the head. (The idiot broke off a tree and brought it in the house with him. It lodged in the wall by my husband's head.)
The car drove exactly perfectly between our desks. Inches either way, one of us would have been dead. Still creeps me out.
I have a bunch of other pics, but here's one. My desk was against the far wall between the two windows. You can see a bit of what's left of the desk on the leftbrown with black shelf.
On the other hand, this thread is excellent, and also one of the first ones I open when I come online.
Thanks for keeping it going.
We all need our laughs! No going all Michael-Douglas; just read the Funny Pic thread.


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Does any one know how to get a contractors license in Denver, Colorado? This would be great if I could get this info as I'm trying to start a new business.
I'd start there.
My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more.
Walter Matthau
Originally posted by spotts
I'd start there.
You are one amazing man. I NEVER would've thought about THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Forum Rules


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National FFA Week began Saturday, February 16, throughout the U.S. and included activities and events at the national, state, and local level in all 50 U.S. states throughout last week.
Each year, National FFA Week gives the nearly 560,000 FFA members throughout the country, Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands a chance to raise public awareness about FFA and agricultural education and share the importance of American agriculture in general.
South Tama FFA celebrated National FFA Week by hosting a canned food drive which donated over 400 cans to the community food pantry. The local FFA also gave away healthy food items to the high school student body with FFA/Agriculture facts on them to raise awareness. One fact that surprised many students and staff is that FFA does not stand for Future Farmers of American. Since 1988 it is no longer an acronym, it is now the National FFA Organization. The high school participated in Agriculture contests throughout the week. Some of these contests included: calf roping, bale tossing, boot race, milk chugging, and tug of war. The FFA also hosted a faculty breakfast to show their appreciation.
Article Photos
Lucas Shope, President of the STC FFA, serving Cherie Overton, a Special Education teacher, during the faculty breakfast.
-Photos provided
The National FFA Organization provides leadership, personal growth and career success training through agricultural education to 557,318 student members in grades seven through 12 who belong to one of 7,498 local FFA chapters throughout the U.S., Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands.


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There are no events scheduled for today.
Sunday, May 20Today's Hours:
Courier Article by David Locker
Sunday, November 25, 2001
Writers Conference Solved Need for Good Mysteries
A few weeks ago, I attended the Magna Cum Murder Mystery conference sponsored by Ball State University in Muncie, Ind. For three days, I rubbed elbows with some of my favorite mystery writers and observed other authors whom I had not yet read. Watching them in action made me want to read their books, too.
Deadstick by Terence Faherty (Worldwide, 1995).
Terence Faherty, a long-time resident of Indianapolis, was the mystery writer I most wanted to meet. I was standing in line to check into the conference hotel ahead of Jeanne Dams, one of my favorite "cozy" writers, when I looked around to see my Evansville friends Jan Steinmark and Bev Ray standing next to the man himself. It was a little surreal meeting these authors face to face.
I had read all the books in Faherty's Owen Keane series but the first one, "Deadstick." When I picked up and started reading an autographed copy at the conference, I was pleased to find out that it is one of the best in the series.
Faherty has been influenced by Raymond Chandler, and it definitely shows in this book. A complex mystery set near the beginning of WWII, the case involves two brothers, a girl they both loved, a plane crash and a murder.
Owen, a failed seminarian with low self-esteem, is a gifted amateur detective with a compulsion to solve mysteries, both real and metaphysical.
Crack Down by Val McDermid (Harper, 1994).
McDermid, a native of Scotland now living in Manchester, England, was the Guest of Honor at the conference. An impressive lady with short white hair who looked like she could hold her own in any barroom scuffle, she demonstrated a keen sense of humor and a literary intelligence second to no one.
Crack Down is the third novel in the Kate Brannigan series. Kate is a private investigator operating out of Manchester. She lives with Richard, a rock music critic and a gentle, naïve and unworldly character.
Poor Richard makes the mistake of becoming infatuated with a sports car the pair had come across in their investigative work.
Car thieves steal the car outside a shady nightclub, and when Richard comes across it again a few days later, he innocently drives it away without telling anyone.
The police stop him, only to find a large quantity of crack in the trunk and a piece of child pornography on the back seat.
If Kate can't solve the case, Richard faces a stiff prison sentence. McDermid's writing is tough, humorous and very British. The New York Times recently called her "the best that we have" in the mystery field.
Little Miss Evil by Lev Raphael (Walker, 2000).
Lev Raphael was the Conference's Master of Revels, complete with long hair and beard. Extremely bright and quick, he comes across more like a fun-loving academic than an author of crime fiction.
It turns out that he is an ex-academic who writes first-class mysteries set in the academic world. Raphael's series of novels features Nick Hoffman, a lowly Edith Wharton bibliographer and composition instructor who is trying desperately to get tenure at the backstabbing jungle called State University of Michigan.
In this witty novel, the SUM English Department is in even more turmoil than usual when Camille Cypriani, a cross between Anita Brookner and Judith Kranz, is hired to occupy an endowed chair at the university with an annual salary of $175, 000.
The English faculty is sputtering with jealousy, and, at the same time, Nick finds himself the target of threatening notes and threats.
The tension builds to a murder, of course, which Nick tends to attract like Jessica Fletcher herself. Lev Raphael is a real find and deserves to be more widely read.
The Body in the Transept by Jeanne M. Dams (Harper, 1996).
With very few exceptions, the authors at Magna Cum Murder were down-to-earth and unassuming individuals.
Jeanne Dams, another Indiana author we can all be proud of, was no exception. Just like her series character, Dorothy Martin, Dams' head was always adorned with a large and colorful hat, while her eyes peered skeptically out of large eyeglasses.
The Body in the Transept is the first in the Dorothy Martin series. We are introduced to Dorothy, an ex-Indiana resident and recent widow living in a small town in England.
After she finds the dead body of the cathedral's librarian, she meets her future husband, police constable Alan Nesbitt.
She knows that she can probably do a better job of solving the murder than he, because of her many contacts in the village, and she does just that.
The "cozy" mystery doesn't get much respect, but it remains probably the most popular type of mystery of all. It's as soothing as a cup of tea by the old fireplace.
David Locker is a librarian with the Evansville-Vanderburgh Public Library. The opinions expressed in this column are personal and do not reflect policies or official recommendations of EVPL.