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His favorite cake has rice and Japan. It has cinnamon and Sicily. It has milk and my fears.
His favorite cake has the smell of the first recipe cooked together. When He said that two kilos of chocolate and a packet of crisps for lunch were probably not a good habit. And in that probably I understood how He was sure.
That would be forever for us.


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With a heavy heart I must announce that September's celebrations have come to an end. (Not to worry – only about 2 weeks left until the next celebration, immediately following the Foreign Service exam! SO SOON AHHH!) While I've only worked about 1 day this month, I can't say it hasn't been fun :)
When I left you last, I was preparing to go to Xela and the Xocomil (sho-co-MEEL) waterpark for Melissa's birthday…and it was awesome! I'm fairly obsessed with my sitemates, so I knew it would be a great weekend, but add to the equation little-kid (splashing around on water slides all day) and grown-up fun (tremendous Indian food, burgers, drinks, dancing) and we couldn't go wrong. Xocomil's about an hour outside of Xela, closer to the Pacific coast, so although it started raining about 10 minutes after arriving, it was still hot and we were already wet from the slides anyway! Kate and Melissa's friend Elizabeth and her boyfriend Alvaro were excellent company, especially as Alvaro used to go there as a kid and his reverted childlike excitement was highly contagious! We were forced to end the day around 3pm due to a massive storm and headed back to Xela to celebrate Melissa's birthday like adults lol. And what would any trip to Xela be without a trip to Hiper Paiz/Wal-Mart for necessities? It never ceases to amuse me how it remains a store almost exclusively for the rich here…
I did work a bit in the week that followed – making salads with the fifth- and sixth-graders at the Trigales school, as well as a meeting about a project Stephen and I want to do with our green-bean groups. The plan is to apply for USAID/Peace Corps grants to pay for the process to certify 2 groups in Buenas Prácticas Agrícolas (Good Agricultural Practices). One group is already almost ready to be certified (they were supposed to receive the certification last year but got kind of screwed over by a miscommunication between NGOs), but both need to brought up to speed with capacity trainings and the necessary safety/hygiene equipment. We're hoping to cover the costs of all that, plus the actual certification, with the help of the exporting company that already buys their green beans, and maybe also the muni and Save the Children. Once the groups are certified, the company will pay them more money for the product; income generation is a main part of the PC Sustainable Agriculture project. So now we need to start planning and filling out the grant application, but I'm not really sure what the timeline for that is…welcome to development work in Guatemala!
That Friday I also got a visit from Allie, who traveled for 2 days to hang out with me and avoid possible disturbances in her town during the September 11th elections. Apparently out east where she is, celebrating cowboys shoot their guns in the air, causing problems when the bullets come down… But Cunen was luckily super tranquilo the whole weekend and the best part was: the political parties were forced to stop advertising themselves for the weekend, so I finally got a rest from all the noise! Wait, I take that back; Allie and I were woken up at 5am Monday by bombas and cohetes (kind of like fireworks, but without the nice accompanying lights) announcing that we'll have a new mayor come January. I was surprised he won, as many people in town described him as very egotistic, but I guess the other candidates weren't as strong. One of the losers was hand-selected by an aldea (village of Cunen) that wants to secede, but threats of rioting never took place. And violence in nearby Nebaj and Sacapulas were localized enough that Allie was able to leave Tuesday morning without any problems. Except maybe a rounder stomach from all the cooking and lazing around we did!
Wednesday was another fun celebration: a birthday party for Kate's old host sister :) Maria Isabel turned 7 and she is the cheekiest, cutest little girl. I thought it was very sweet of her mother to invite me, since I don't know the family as well as Kate or even Melissa, and you never turn down an invitation here! She must have had a good time putting together the guest list, though: 3 gringas, an elderly Evangelical pastor and his wife, an ex-mayor who ran again this year and lost, and a bunch of little girls. The situation was so ridiculous that I almost started inappropriately laughing during the pre-meal prayer! But we ended up making good conversation and only lightly touching on the elephant in the room (the recent elections), so that by the time we left, the pastor told us what fun girls we were! Ohhh I love the random experiences here :)
That was followed by Guatemala's 190th Independence Day on Thursday! All of the schools in town participated in the morning parade, which I got to see from my front door as it passed right by my house. My host siblings and their friends and all the other random children I know were adorable, if not the most talented musicians, dancers, or gymnasts. (Did I mention the "rhythmic gymnastics" event one of the secondary schools put on for their anniversary? Let's just say it was highly entertaining, and you know my standards!). Unfortunately the customary afternoon games and pig-catching – I can't even begin to describe how excited I was to see people try to catch a greased-up pig! – were canceled because the current mayor wasn't re-elected and obviously needed to vent his frustration.
Cunen in celebration
my host sister (with the whistle) and her friends dancing in the parade
And FINALLY, this past weekend was Noor's birthday celebration at the lake. We had a great time prepping in Pana for her party on Saturday night in another lake town, Santa Cruz La Laguna. The hostel there is really chill and has really great food and didn't mind when about 20 of us volunteers took over the lounge area for our own use! It was a fantastic night with people I really like; I definitely wasn't ready to leave. But of course I had to and I got back to Cunen yesterday, laden down with more peanut butter :)


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March 2013
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Swift Is a Die Hard
March 2013
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Atlanta Falcons Talk
Talk about the Atlanta Falcons, other NFL teams and more.
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Cap question
March 2013
I have to ask...
HOW THE HELL do the EAGLES have so much cap space....two years ago they bought every high priced guy in (IE dream team) with BIG money....yet they unload them and no cap hits....I want their capologist!
Not saying we need a ton of FA guys....but to be able to unload them with relatively no problem is impressive
March 2013
how much do they have?
March 2013
Mike Vick was gambling on dog fights again. They got all kinds of money now...
March 2013
here are a few of the top:
Bengals: $28.9 million.
Browns: $28.7 million.
Buccaneers: $28.8 million.
Jaguars: $26.6 million.
Eagles: $26.3 million.
Packers: $18.3 million.
i really don't get the Eagles at all.....and the Bengals have just been shrewed.......
Swift Is a Die Hard
March 2013
Eagles cut Nnamdi , restructured Vick.
Two huge reasons why
I'm delusional from our playoff loss against GB . Don't take me seriously until year 2413 .
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Stampin' Up! is celebrating its 25th Anniversary, and with that is bringing back favorite stamp images from the last 25 years and creating 12 new stamp sets which will release-one set each month during 2013. As an added bonus, along with some great classic images from our stamping past, each "Best Of" set will also include a never-before-seen image for your Stamping pleasure!
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Hi All,
I stumbled upon this clip from the British Pathe website yesterday...it has no useful label or tags on it which is why I think its been missed - its very clearly and definitely the ODJB - how wonderful to see them playing!!!!
Ive certainly never seen it or even heard of its existence before, having only ever seen still photos...(apologies if this HAS been posted before)
Anyway - heres it the link
its really amazing
Cheers all
It was 1921, not 1931. By 1931, the OBJB had broken up (though it was to be revived in 1936) and of course a film on this theme made in 1931 would be in sound.
The video is also available at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RgF_zm7YY0 where one of the commenters writes,
"According to H.O.Brunn's 1960 book, "The Story of the Original Dixieland Jazz Band", the date of this film is April 20, 1921 and the location New York Zoological Gardens. Parisian dancer Mlle Evelyn Valee holds the kid and the elephants Betsy and Jewell "enjoyed the music immensely" (they had been circus elephants). Blue-nose apes did a war path, Joe the Chimp wept but the star was Jim the Polar Bear who hid in his cave for the full ensemble, but at the suggestion of Dr Pike shimmied gracefull at a clarinet and trombone duet by Shields and Edwards. Head keeper James Coyle said he'd never seen a bear act this way before. Willis Holly, secretary of the Park Dept remarked "I don't see how this experiment will determine anything of scientific value until the band begins to play some real music. So far I haven't heard any.""


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Connecticut's realtors are throwing their weight behind the effort to allow small businesses to buy into the state's health insurance pool. WNPR's Harriet Jones reports.
About 600 realtors gathered at the Capitol Thursday to lobby legislators about a range of issues. But Bob Kimball, the president of the Connecticut Association of Realtors says one issue at the forefront of everyone's mind has little to do with the housing market – health insurance.
"We're not asking for it to be given to us, we're just asking that we can have the coverage that we can afford to pay."
Most realtors are independent business people and have to buy coverage on the individual market.
"They can get insurance which costs some of our members $1,500 to $2,500 a month, but there's no group plans."
For that reason, the association is supporting two bills this session, one of which would allow small businesses to purchase coverage through the state employee plan. In effect it's an attempt to revive a provision that was stripped from the Sustinet legislation last year. Kimball says realtors are speaking up, and he'd like to see more small business owners get active on the issue.
"There seem to be other organizations that seem to be in the same predicament that we're in but they're not saying too much about it. What we need to have done is to have them come forth and start talking like we are and I think something will happen here."
Kimball says the state seems to be seeing a patchy recovery in the housing market, with some areas ahead of others. But he says short sales and foreclosures are still a looming issue, acting as a brake on the market.
"There's all kind of conjecture out there, but most everybody out there is waiting for the other foot to fall, that there's foreclosures that have not surfaced yet, and will be coming down the pike."
For that reason, realtors are proposing a change to the state's foreclosure rules. The association wants to see judges have discretion to order a foreclosure by market sale, where the owner is allowed 120 days to attempt to sell the home on the open market.
"The person who's being foreclosed upon might benefit by being able to sell the house for more than what the bank's going to take it for. It will keep these investors from buying up these properties cheap and then reselling them. It would stop some blight in some of the neighborhoods if these people were just given a chance to sell the house. And this way here the judge would control it and it would be much more fair and equitable than what we have with what we call short sales at the present time."
Realtors say they're also supporting the Learn Here Live Here bill currently in the legislature that aims to make it easier for young people graduating from college in Connecticut to settle here and buy a home.
For WNPR, I'm Harriet Jones.


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I went to see Where the Wild Things Are over the weekend and had mixed feelings. I think I was expecting something else. I expected to feel nostalgic maybe, or even happy. I felt the opposite. Not because the movie wasn't good- it was very good- but it was disturbing to me and very sad. I wanted a cathartic scene between Max and Carol. I wanted Max to change somehow. I think he was glad to be home- but I also think he's going to flip out again the next chance he gets.
What I really found interesting was that the wild things were not scary because they were monsters. They were scary because they were so child, no, human-like. Their relationships were broken. They were selfish, moody, and prideful. They could love, but at any moment they could snap and eat you, or worse, disappoint you.
Anyways, I really love the feel Spike Jonze was able to portray. It was very dreamy, but not unrealistic. I think the movie was greatly helped by the soundtrack, something I can't stop listening to at work. I thought I would share it with you. Enjoy Karen O And The Kids.
Where the Wild Things Are Soundtrack


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Jagwar Ma - Come and Save Me
Look. There is no getting away from the fact that summer has been and gone. Tonight and tomorrow a blanket of snow is due to hit our shores which will herald the start of winter. So put away your Birkenstock - or espadrilles if you're fashionably concious - and your baggy combat shorts and take your woollen overcoat from the closet.
To remind us of those heady days of summer (Wednesday 28th March 2012) here's one of our favourite songs that was on constant rotation throughout those glorious few hours and one which will always transport us back to that sunny afternoon.
Right, where did we put our snoods?


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Hi guys, I thought I would start by talking about my face routine, which is going to be centered on foundation mostly. I'll talk about my acne in a dedicated post.
Lately I haven't been really wanting to "cake" my face, if that makes sense. If I want to go do some groceries or something like that, I just want to conceal my acne scars and even my tone, without putting tons of products on my face. And it's just more practical, that way I can get ready in 15 minutes, instead of spending I dunno an hour to do a full face of makeup.
So after I cleaned and moisturized my face, I just go in with my concealer, to hide my dark circles and acne scars, and the occasional pimples on my face. I just use a drugstore concealer, the one I use mostly is the Bell one, and I just bought this camouflage cream from Essence, so I'm currently testing it out.
It's very affordable makeup as you can prolly tell. Then I usually go on with a powder to set the concealer, and just even my tone. The powder I'm using right now is also from Essense, it's the mattifying powder in the shade light beige.
Essence products are great and dirt cheap although they might be a bit hard to find. Along with their sister brand Catrice they are some of my favourite brands at the drugstore, and very affordable too. They would give a run for their money to more pricey drugstore brands like Maybelline and L'Oreal.
I may put on some blush, some of my favorite blushes are from Catrice with their defining blush line. But I'm also loving the Essence All in one bronzing highlighter, in the shade Brunette (darker skin).
As the name suggests it is a all in one palette, with a bronzer, blush and highlighter. The bronzer is a bit shimmery, but it's barely visible on the skin and I just think it gives a very natural finish, and with spring here I'm definitely digging the natural vibe as a whole, and going for peach/coral colors.
I may put some eyeshadow on my lids, usually one that is that is similar to my skin color.For that I find that the shade Cappucino from the Sleek Au naturel palette works best for me. It does give a nice wash of color while still looking pretty natural for my skin tone which is fair/light with a yellow undertone.The Au naturel palette is as the name suggests all about that natural look, although you can still smoke it out with some of the darker shades. It's just better to prime your eyelids though since the colors can fade quite quickly, at least on me.
I may skip using mascara,even though I just bought a new one, the Lash Princess volume mascara from Essence (again). But I can't go out without doing my eyebrows. My brows are already full, but they get quite messy, so I always have to set them with something. Currently I'm reaching for two products, the brow liner from Yves Rocher and the Wet n Wild brow kit. In both cases I still have to go with the wax so my brows won't become a mess.
And finally I just add some very light touch of color to the lips, either a nude lipstick like some of the Megalast line from Wet n Wild , or just put on the Cherry lip balm from Yves Rocher, and I'm good to go.
Oh and to just make things less powdery setting your face with a setting spray is a good idea. It also makes your makeup last longer. A really cheap one at the drugstore that I'm using is the Elf makeup mist and set, the mister isn't great so you have to really apply it far from your face, but it does feel like it makes my makeup last longer, while also making everything just look better.
So that's it, you don't have to do a full face on an everyday basis imo, and this routine has really helped me just get out from home faster, especially if I'm on a hurry.


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We're thrilled to host Ramit Sethi, author of New York Times Bestseller, I Will Teach You to Be Rich, for a fireside chat with Google's Rachael O'Meara. You can find his book on Google Books and Google Play here: http://goo.gl/ItbiE8 . Ramit can show the magic of tapping into the power of behavioral psychology. Anyone can learn how to do this. It's helped him help hundreds of thousands of people solve their own financial problems. He also happens to be one of the best damn marketers we know. In the next 60 minutes, we're going to talk about all this in a heart to heart with Ramit, and get to know him a little bit more. We'll cover: In depth look at personal psychology 'experiments' for your career and personal life "Mythconceptions" about personal finance, leveraging social media for your business and success We'll soak up deep insights on positioning and human behavior We'll take questions from the audience and Google moderator afterwards About the Author: As CNN calls him, Ramit is Generation Y's favorite personal finance adviser. His message: Motivation isn't enough. Develop a system, and get over yourself. He blogs a message of tough financial love. Ramit's unusual combination of psychology, analytical testing, and irreverent style led Fortune Magazine to call him the "new finance guru on the block." This summer he was featured in Forbes 2013 Wealth Wizards, opposite Warren Buffet as one of 2013's top financial experts. Ramit appears on national television regularly, and periodically writes for the New York Times. He studied social influence and persuasion at Stanford, and previously co-founded PBworks, a Silicon Valley collaboration startup.
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Envisioning Africa
Racism and Imperialism in Conrad's Heart of Darkness
Publication Year: 2015
For one hundred years, Heart of Darkness has been among the most widely read and taught novels in the English language. Hailed as an incisive indictment of European imperialism in Africa upon its publication in 1899, more recently it has been repeatedly denounced as racist and imperialist. Peter Firchow counters these claims, and his carefully argued response allows the charges of Conrad's alleged bias to be evaluated as objectively as possible. He begins by contrasting the meanings of race, racism, and imperialism in Conrad's day to those of our own time. Firchow then argues that Heart of Darkness is a novel rather than a sociological treatise; only in relation to its aesthetic significance can real social and intellectual-historical meaning be established. Envisioning Africa responds in detail to negative interpretations of the novel by revealing what they distort, misconstrue, or fail to take into account. Firchow uses a framework of imagology to examine how national, ethnic, and racial images are portrayed in the text, differentiating the idea of a national stereotype from that of national character. He believes that what Conrad saw personally in Africa should not be confused with the Africa he describes in the novel; Heart of Darkness is instead an envisioning and a revisioning of Conrad's experiences in the medium of fiction.
Published by: The University Press of Kentucky
Title Page, Copyright Page
Except incidentally and by way of supporting my own argument, I have not in this book taken into explicit account the ample and varied critical history of Joseph Conrad's novel Heart of Darkness. I make no apologies for the omission because this task has already been admirably performed by Anthony Fothergill and Robert Burden. Nevertheless, though I have not systematically reviewed and summarized others' hypotheses and insights, I do wish to acknowledge the great help I have often received ...
Introduction: Race, Ethnicity, Nationality, Empire
"Your proposal delights me," Joseph Conrad wrote on the last day of 1898 to William Blackwood, the publisher of Blackwood's, who had asked Conrad a short time earlier to supply him with a suitable contribution for the one-thousandth issue of his magazine, scheduled toappear the following February. But delighted though he was, Conrad was...
1. Envisioning Africa
Joseph Conrad's African experience was of relatively short duration. Not counting his somewhat muddled preparations in London and Brussels or the slow sea journey to and from the Congo Free State, it actually lasted a little less than six months, from mid-June to early December 1890.1 Psychologically and emotionally it must have seemed a great deal longer, what with the disappointment of not being able to assume command of...
2. A Mere Animal in the Congo
The impact of the African experience on Conrad, both as man and as writer, was, it seems fair to say, out of all proportion to its length. Speaking about it to his oldest and most trusted literary confidant, Edward Garnett, Conrad once said categorically, "[B]efore the Congo I was just a mere animal"1 (Jean-Aubry, Life 1:141). This is almost certainly an exaggeration, but even discounting a little for Conrad's alleged penchant...
3. Envisioning Kurtz
In the "Author's Note" that he wrote in 1917 on the occasion of the republication of Youth in the edition of his collected works, Conrad remarks of Heart of Darkness that, like "Youth," it is a story based on "experience too; but it is experience pushed a little (and only very little) beyond the actual facts of the case for the perfectly legitimate, I believe, purpose of bringing it home to the minds and bosoms of the readers"...
4. Imperial Sham and Reality in the Congo
Though Heart of Darkness has been and continues to be subjected to the minutest critical examination and cross-examination, so far as I know no critic has ever noted Marlow's insistence on distinguishing between two Kurtzes, an "original" one and a "sham." He does this twice. The first instance occurs in the context of defining Kurtz's origins-hence, ...
5. Unspeakable Rites and Speakable Rights
With the obvious exception of Kurtz, not a single one of the Congo Belgians in Conrad's novel is anything more than a stereotype. Even the Accountant at the Outer Station, the only male Belgian character other than Kurtz who can be said to possess any sort of redeeming qualities, is a caricature, an absurd "hairdresser's dummy" who walks about with oiled hair and a green-lined parasol. For the rest, they consist either of...
6. E.J. Glave, Captain Rom, and the Making of Heart of Darkness
Recently Edward James Glave has been mentioned by Sven Lindqvist in connection with Heart of Darkness as an "old Congo hand" who was in a position to know what atrocities were being committed during the mid-1890s in the Congo Free State. As evidence, Lindqvist quotes at some length from the last essay Glave wrote for the...
Conclusion: Exterminating All the Brutes
According to Roger Smith, our modern conception of genocide as the most heinous of all imaginable crimes differs fundamentally from the way prior generations viewed it. "While the slaughter of whole groups has occurred throughout history," he writes, "it is only within the past few centuries that this has produced even a sense of moral horror, much less been thought of as 'criminal'" (28). He goes on to refer to the grisly...
Works Cited
Print-ISBN-13: 9780813121284
Page Count: 288
Publication Year: 2015
OCLC Number: 648577092
MUSE Marc Record: Download for Envisioning Africa


text: Pat sends his love to everyone! Isn't he a great sport for allowing me to put his picture on my blog! Again...doesn't he look great! He had a good day today and slept alot of it. The picture of above is our life group (minus two couples) praying before they left this evening. What an amazing blessing to have couples that you can live life together, study and pray together and most of all laugh together. We were laughing so hard tonight that Pat was trying not to so that he wouldn't hurt! You guys mean so much to our family.


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I know I'm a terrible person but I have an addiction to my ex. She feels terrible too and we always say we need to stop but we end up back to each other. My ex girlfriend says she's dating this guy but before they become officially a couple she says we need to break things off. I'm dating this girl and I know I have a problem. I want to propose to her but once I overcome this addiction. I try ignoring my ex and not responding to her and she does too but somehow I end up contacting her and we end up having sex. I wanted to try moving to the suburbs but my girlfriends job is here and she doesn't want to break away from her family. I don't know what else to try...
I need to stop seeing my ex but I feel addicted to her help?
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Gambing addiction(38 Posts)
Can't sleep as feeling so stressed and worried.
DH has been playing poker for a few years now. When he first got into it he worked really hard to learn as much as he could and took it very seriously, playing in small online tournaments to start and slowly building up a pot of money. He was determined to understand how to play properly and really succeed.
I was initially concerned as I knew nothing about it and was worried about the gambling aspect, but he's always been very open about it. A couple of years ago he had a fairly big win, and paid off some credit card debt of mine. He did it willingly, but since then if I've mentioned a concern over his playing he has said things like 'oh but it's ok if I'm paying off your credit cards isn't it' so I've felt it hard to criticise.
We have gone through a very stressful couple of years with birth of dc2 and redundancy for both of us, combined with house moving stress/failure.
We are about to start a large building project and it is very stressful and worrying. We will be spending all of our (not unsubstantial) savings. However we are desperate for this work as have no space for our family and no chance of moving for the foreseeable future.
I've noticed DHs mood changing the last few months. We have been thorough a rough patch relationship wise. It escalated on Thursday when he got paralytic at a work do and forgot where he lived/lost his wallet so couldn't pay the taxi, was a complete mess. I had an important day on Friday so was really annoyed with him as my Dc ended up waking up so I only got a couple of hours sleep and he couldn't help me at all. On friday he then stayed after work and didn't get home til 8.30, when he was clearly drunk again.
Id been hoping to talk so was livid he could do this again, but it's so out of character I asked him what was going on and if anything was wrong.
Eventually he came out with it, he's managed to run up £4k on his credit card playing at poker clubs. He's been worried about telling me as he thought I would leave him.
This is obviously a blow in light of the work we are about to do.
But more than that I am so worried about the addiction side of things. I don't know how to handle it. He has said that he will not go to clubs at all any more, but still wants to play small tournaments at home in the meantime. He also wants to take on a second job to pay off the debt but this is pretty unrealistic in our current situation as his job is very intensive.
We will eventually be able to pay off the £4k but now I feel I can't trust him to put our family first. I'd like him to stop playing completely until it's all sorted but I realise if this is a true addiction it needs to come from him.
I feel sick about it all as his actions have such an impact on all of us. I'm also worried about his drinking which seems to be a bit of an issue since this (I'm assuming because of the stress). Alcoholism/addictive behaviour runs in his family so it's really concerning.
Has anyone been through this?
I feel so alone, there is noone I can discuss this with as I promised DH not to tell anyone. But he's also getting very defensive if I bring it up
Yes, 28 years ago my boyfriend was addicted to gambling on horses. I tried to help him stop, ranted if he succumbed, tried to control the finances (we were living together). He told me he'd stopped, but was lying - the addiction was too strong.
He committed suicide. He was 23.
He needs professional help - you can't do it for him. Like any addict he will fool himself that he has it under control and that he will win money.
He hasn't and he won't, but until he realises this he will continue to lose money and try to win it back, only to lose more.
I'm so sorry, but until he has sorted this out I believe you need to be apart, for both your sakes.
Best of luck
He needs to go to a gamblers meeting, or if not a group meeting, someone who can give advice, so he can see how it is affecting his life and those around him. Giving up the big stuff and only playing small will NOT work, the wins will not be enough for him when he does win and it will just escalate again.
The drinking will probably be linked, he was winning, paid things off for you, probably felt like he knew what he was doing and the debt was run up by trying to chase loss after loss. He needs to not focus on trying to make his debt into the wins he once had and trying to make easy money, and focus on realistic ways to improve his financial situation. Money rarely comes for nothing!
Really REALLY needs cutting at the bud, not just reducing. If he's fessed up to you that's a really good start.
Clearly you know it isn't him being himself, he needs to talk to someone.
(personal experience)
I don't agree with BMW6 I don't think you need to be apart if you can get him some real help, and he WANTS to stop. (although he probably won't in the first place if he just wants to cut down)
It's hard but love and professional and emotional support can help towards improving his situation and getting back to couple you used to be.
He's been selfish, and obviously it isn't your responsibility. But leaving him at this point may make his shitty situation even shittier, and give him no reason to change :/
He needs professional help, and you need support
Keeping his secrets is the wrong thing to do
He's been worried about telling me as he thought I would leave him.
I had that when he first told me of his addiction. I loved him so much and reassured him that I wouldn't leave him.
He continued gambling and lying to me. If I could go back in time I'd tell him we would seperate while he got professional help, and when he was "fixed" we could try again. I'd also talk openly about it - his family knew, but didn't tell me. I knew, but didn't tell them (or my family). We all enabled him out of love, and lost him as a result.
The enabling is what I'm worried about. And that he still wants to carry on. I told him he should stop completely, at least until the money is repaid but he got upset about it.
I don't know how to broach this with him. Separating at the moment is very hard because of our housing situation. The building work is imminent and it will be chaos. That on its own is going to be very stressful and I literally don't know how we are going to get through this with the gambling worry on top
I don't know who to confide in. I get that he is ashamed about what's happened, but his mum knows he has been playing and expressed concern in the past. I kind of feel like her knowing may make him face up to it more than me. But His DF is v ill (terminal) and I don't feel I can put this extra stress on her
I will suggest he contacts gambling anon and stop completely. I'm scared he won't agree to it though. This has to come from him, I know.
He is seeming very very down and criticising himself a lot. It's scaring me.
Walkng on egg shells and being too scared to bring up these issues is
totally enabling
Him walking around with a hangdog face should not inhibit you. If you think he may harm himself if pushed to do the right thing, then even more reason that he must seek professional help
You cannot manage him, and he clearly cannot manage himself
No I haven't been through this but suspect him thinking he can play at any level and control himself is being deluded. On top of this a drink problem could scupper his existing job let alone affect his ability to start a second.
As a side issue with a young family to consider and redundancy etc still in the recent past I would strongly counsel against using all your savings on a building project. Is it possible to scale back?
His actions have such an impact on our little family. This is why I'm scared to broach.
I know I need to be tough but I haven't been great mentally myself (pnd) and it feels like the walls are closing in on me
How do I insist he does this? Do I literally say he has to leave if not?
Hi, there is support for you too, perhaps try contacting Gamblers Anonomous www.gamblersanonymous.org.uk who can offer you advice as well as your partner?
I don't know about the building project, no chance of scaling back really. Perhaps we could hold back on part of it and at least keep a few grand in the bank. It does feel very risky as for years we've had our savings as a financial buffer, though even with redundancy we both found jobs v quickly so never needed it.
We have been working towards this for such a long time, we need more space desperately, and due to mortgage rules changing we will be unlikely to be able to move until dc2 gets cheaper childcare
Our house situation is part of the reason it's all been so stressful
I agree he needs to go cold turkey. Any kind of playing is normalising this.
We are so close to starting the build I feel such pressure to work out what to do. I wouldn't say his drinking is affecting his work though, it's the culture there that is partly responsible , it's like nothing I've ever seen before. Very unhealthy.
He has agreed to scale back from the work drinking.
God what a mess.
Thanks Suzanne.
I'll try and get a chance to give them a call. I'm desperately trying to not cry at my desk at work right now
I will suggest he contacts gambling anon and stop completely. I'm scared he won't agree to it though. This has to come from him, I know
He is seeming very very down and criticising himself a lot. It's scaring me
You have no other option really but to be pushy. You need to explain to him that what is important in your relationship right now is you two and the child and not his hobby/habit/addiction.
That he HAS to stop, for the sake of all of you. And that you will be there for him, support him but ONLY if he takes the steps of professional help.
He will say it's not a problem that needs that much help, and that you are overreacting and he knows what he needs to do. But insist he sees a professional. There are helplines, chat rooms, one and one and group meetings, so whatever is is style, there is something to start from.
No excuses, he has to make it work. "Cutting down" shouldn't be his priority when your relationship and money is on the line.
As for the debt - 4k - reassure him it can be paid off - he'll be in a rut of thinking "one more win" could wipe the 4k and your the one stopping him.
It's rubbish, and just as much hard work for you as him, which isn't fair. But if you want to stay with him, and get the old him back, the work is hard. But he HAS to see that. If not, losing battle.
Making getting some proper support for you your priority not "if you get a chance"
Making getting some proper support for you your priority not "if you get a chance"
Make getting some proper support for you your priority not "if you get a chance"
sorry, pc being silly
Hi, just wanted to say I have no time to post thoroughly but I have been living with somebody addicted to gambling for 7 years, so just marking my space until I have a spare 5 mins to chat a bit bettr
Thanks all for responding.
Reindeer I look forward to your message later
I think I'm going to have to go home. Trying not to vomit at my desk. Not sure why if it's just stress?
I've been reading other threads about DHs that have gambled and it's panicking me. I don't want to think this night spell the end for us as I love him. But I can't enable him
I've just remembered that during my hospital stay for DC2 (CS) he was pretty much attached to his iPad playing. Even when I was in the hdu after blood loss.
I remember it making me feel so empty inside but I blocked it as I wanted to feel happy about the birth of my child. So I suppressed the feeling
It's just not normal is it
Is there any positivity in the fact he chose to confess rather than me discovering it?
I think there is a lot of value in is confession instead of you discovering. The confession shows he's thinking about his actions and the negative effects they are having, and may be a step in him wanting to get help.. xx
Yes, there is value in him coming clean rather than getting caught before it spiralled completely out of control. Hopefully, this is the extent of the financial trouble.
It bodes well from that POV, but I would be extremely concerned that he thinks he can continue to play and keep control of it. This is the crux, love.
I am married to a man who is a gambling addict.
It has not always been easy but we have managed to make it work. Primarily because he admits he has a problem and works with me rather than against.
This is how we made it work:
We have a joint account and then I have a private one. I check them religiously every day. I question everything. He knows it and expects it and it becomes rare.
All receipts are given to me.
He attends GA when he needs too or if I suggest he should go- lets say something bad has happened and I feel he needs to.
I am in charge of our finances out of necessity rather than any great desire and will always have to be.
I love my husband, we have a great marriage and thankfully his addiction is not the whole of us and him. I was lucky enough to marry a man, who's greatest flaw is this but his good points make up for it so much that it wasn't worth walking away from him. I made a choice. Considering his debts were 178K in total in 6 months by the time of my finding out, we had a lot of work to do, especially in dealing with his childhood issues which led him to arcades and they because his safe place- later online gambling :-(
I can honestly say this won't work out well for the vast number of people married to a gambling addict, but there is hope if sees he has a problem and he want's to help himself, however it did take an awful lot out of me- it was really hard work and it took a long time to forgive what he had done. I view it as he was ill and needed help. I would not do this at the cost of a child though.
He has relapsed twice, come to me twice and luckily the amounts of money were small and even smaller. So it hasn't been perfect but it's been a good 3 years.
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Its the 14 the of August & although we like to use the word 'INDEPENDENCE DAY' for this occasion I have gone for Salvation Day. Salvation in essence means freedom from slavery. That is the issue for the blog today. We are slaves as a nation & as individuals as well. As individuals, we are slaves to traditions, other people's standards of right & wrong, our ego & the urge for self respect. As a nation we are intellectually slaves to the west. We are slaves of our laziness & dislike for hard work. We are slaves to our habit of giving excuses for our shortcomings. Slaves of our urge to procure more & more money. Slaves of religion. Slaves of the world's superpowers. Slaves of our system. And so much more.
Somehow we have to get salvation for ourselves first then our nation. But our ego would never allow that to happen.
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Mike Ludwig of Truthout: Workers in nine major cities are now fighting back against sexual harassment.
The Government Accountability Office approved a proposal to slash funding from the Children's Health Insurance Program for low-income families.
Noam Chomsky is institute professor emeritus in the Department of Linguistics and Philosophy at Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Among his books are Hegemony or Survival and Failed States. His newest book is Who Rules the World? (Metropolitan Books, the American Empire Project, 2016). His website is www.chomsky.info.


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Iowa City,
Over the last decade, second generation antipsychotics have been increasingly utilized.
Since their introduction, however, atypical antipsychotics have been increasingly associated
with significant metabolic complications including hyperlipidemia, insulin
resistance/diabetes mellitus, and obesity. These metabolic complications increase the risk
for cardiovascular disease in populations with an already elevated risk.
The initial goal of the proposed study is to identify early signs of endothelial dysfunction
and vascular disease in those treated with atypical antipsychotics. The identification of
early signs of vascular disease may further link metabolic complications with any
cardiovascular risk. Demonstration of changes in vascular function associated with atypical
antipsychotics represents an important identifiable intermediate of more long-term
cardiovascular risk.
The second goal of the proposed study is to identify genetic factors that may be associated
with the development of cardiovascular disease, which can later serve as a guide to predict
risk. Accurate prediction of risk may facilitate the future development of an empirical,
risk-based, individualized selection process for antipsychotic medications.
Aim 1: To quantify the role of antipsychotic-induced metabolic complications on the
development of vascular disease using measures of endothelial function.
Hypothesis 1: Atypical antipsychotics will lead to greater impairments in endothelial
function, evidenced by decreased flow-mediated dilation from baseline measures and compared
with changes over time in controls. Medication-induced metabolic complications will be
temporally associated with these impairments in endothelial function.
Aim 2: To investigate the role of candidate pharmacogenetic polymorphisms with
cardiovascular and metabolic complications of atypical antipsychotics.
Hypothesis 2: Profiles of polymorphisms at receptors targeted by atypical antipsychotics
will be associated with impaired cardiovascular function and metabolic complications.
Inclusion Criteria:
- 18-50 years of age
- Being started on a first-line, second-generation, antipsychotic associated with
weight gain (risperidone, olanzapine, or quetiapine) for the treatment of an
affective or psychotic disorder -OR- psychiatric controls not taking antipsychotic
medications will also be enrolled
Exclusion Criteria:
- Exclusion criteria will include the presence of any of the following: neoplasm,
active thyroid disease (i.e. not euthyroid), pregnancy or planned pregnancy, diabetes
mellitus, Raynaud's disease, anticoagulant therapy, or inability to provide informed
consent. We will exclude participants who have started valproic acid derivatives in
the preceding 6 months, given its association with insulin resistance and weight
gain. Participants with active substance abuse or dependence will also be excluded.
Principal InvestigatorJess G Fiedorowicz, M.D., Ph.D.University of Iowa
Iowa City, Iowa 52242United StatesThere is no listed contact information for this specific location.Site Status: N/A
| All trademarks are property of their legal owners. | All Rights Reserved
ClinicalConnection.com is a resource that provides information on clinical trials conducted worldwide.
ClinicalConnection.com does not conduct or endorse clinical trials. Please consult your physician before participating.
© All Rights Reserved.
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Content count62
Last visited
About Tonka
Finally read the FAQs
Profile Information
Washington State
Shooting, lots and lots of shooting, USPSA all divisions, 3 gun, some trap and skeet not to good at these
Real Name
Tom Kettells
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What is your favorite load for your PCC?
Tonka replied to MrPostman's topic in Pistol Caliber Carbine - TechnicalYep clay is a nice powder have used it in 45 and 40 as well, just like the other shotgun powders. I have also used WST for 9mm and that works well also
Carry Optic
Tonka replied to cbrussell's topic in USPSA/IPSC ShootingThe hardest thing about red dots that I have found is, are they bright enough for say vegas or Phoenix or can you see them in the sun light off a white piece of steel. The dots are much better now then they used to be but if you can find a few that friends have test them out make sure they are adjustable...good luck
Staging the DA Trigger vs Pull-Through Method
Tonka replied to AzNooB's topic in Handgun TechniquesI do recall this method when I first became a police officer, back in the very early 80's. As years went by we found this to be ok for bullseye shooting but not for anything else. Keep your eye on the front site and just pull through the trigger in a constant pull, do not slap it keep the gun level and follow through. After a while you will be able to do it and keep the same groups
How to speed up transitions or move faster
Tonka replied to gmg's topic in Tips for ImprovementThere is really an art to this. One of my favorite people to watch is Max Michele. If you want he starts to move, depending on the target array, just as his last shot is fired. Then when he arrives at the next location his gun is up and he will fire just as soon as it is legal to do so. He is ready to go when he gets to where he is going. JoJo also does the same. Now although they are both fast and its doubtful we will be that fast you can cut your time down quite a bit by being ready to shoot when you get to where you want to go. Hope this helps
Removing belt
Tonka replied to blacklab's topic in Multi-gun Rules / Stage Design / Match AdministrationAt any USPSA match run with their that would be a DQ read the rule on what a gun bag is and it is not the holster
New 3-Gun Nation Target
Tonka replied to StealthyBlagga's topic in Multi-gun Rules / Stage Design / Match Administration3 gun nations seems to want to slow everything down. They used to have two circles on the target and if you hit the corner of one of the targets outside the circle it would count as a miss. now this it is going to turn into a bulleye match...
Carry Optics in 3 Gun: Post your opinion.
Tonka replied to USCSBarney's topic in Multi-gun Rules / Stage Design / Match AdministrationI have shot USPSA since its beginning and before. The more divisions to my way of thinking the better, I shoot all of them, I get tired of one then switch to another it keeps me interested in the different shooting styles and lets my brain work a bit more trying to figure out the stages from a revolver point of view to the now fun division of PCC.
First shot
Tonka replied to petrojc's topic in Little things I've NoticedClassifiers are a strange monster. I tell others and do the same myself, just shoot that stage like you could shoot it 10 more times the same way. Don't push it let it go. You don't want to be labeled a GM but only be a B class shooter just because you went crazy and shot the classifiers good. Just relax and shoot the way you always do, it will often turn out best
Don't try so hard
Tonka replied to CraigEcash86's topic in Little things I've NoticedI have noticed the same thing, often I would watch the super squad and try and copy what they did, well I found out that what works for them does not work for me, I try and find out what flows for me on a stage. After a while it became easier. Don't try and count the steps just find a way that keeps you flowing in a positive manner
How many of your hits are alphas
Tonka replied to Mikeski's topic in Little things I've Noticedyears ago some wise shooter that I knew said that if your not shooting at least 80-85% alpha your not shooting enough of them. He also stated that if your shooting more than 85% you may be shooting to slow. There are a lot of variables here just some food for thought
New member & 9mm powders
Tonka replied to hobbit99's topic in Miscellaneous BEginnersI shoot a lot of 9mm, from the powders that you have listed my favorite is Silhouette my very least favorite and a powder that I truly hate is Unique. Silhouette has a very soft impulse and works well not only in my pistols but in the PCC also
Is the .45 dead in USPSA?
Tonka replied to SyNaPsE's topic in Miscellaneous BEginnersyes for sure if you look at the last nationals it was dominated by the 45 230 grain. I plan on going back to it as well as the 40 single stack is a monster to shoot
929 for S&W Repair
Tonka replied to NoSteel's topic in Revolver ForumThey may or may not fix this but beware if you have polished up the action they will send you a note stating that the gun is unsafe and they will not work on it unless they replace all the parts that you polished. I asked them why it was unsafe and they told me that it did not meet their standards...
Holster in carry on
Tonka replied to ColoradoShooter's topic in Travel, Locations, Ranges, etc.Yes I just inquired about that with TSA holster are ok but magazines are not
Las Vegas
Tonka replied to konkapot's topic in Travel, Locations, Ranges, etc.check out the pro gun club always something going on with Pete Rensing there


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Reviewed By: Average Joe
Synopsis: Two teens Nick (Michael Cera) and Norah (Kat Dennings) are thrust together by a chance encounter, turned first date. The two endure a night in New York City looking for a rock bank, The Fluffy's (or is it Fluffies?) The two seem to have nothing in common, but their love of similar music and their confusion of teenage life.
Review: Just to mix things up here at The Net Flicker. I'll give a bulleted summary of my reaction to the movie.
- Michael Cera is absolutely hilarious with dry comedy. For him to play someone so socially awkward I'm convinced he's at least partially socially awkward in real life.
- Tris (Alexis Dziena) is really hot, and she is actually a month older than me, despite looking young, so I can say that.
- There's something endearing about the authenticity of the relationship between Nick and Norah. I guess my point is, it makes sense that they would connect.
- The bathroom scene with Norah's best friend Carolina (Ari Graynor) was absolutely disgusting and unnecessary.
- The movie was predictable, though you probably new that before you started watching it.
- I liked the speech about the Beatles and hand holding.
- You have to at least snicker at the Seth Myers and Andy Samberg cameos.
- A couple of parts that I laughed out loud included a handi-napkin, and jokes about Nick's haircut.
- The entire running joke with the chewing gum is stupid.
- Also, let me just say, never, ever, put your foot near my face. It's a sure way to get punched by Average Joe.
Rating: 5.9 (+1 if you are really into Indie Rock, +1 if you're 15-19)
Synopsis: It's a fun, light-hearted film that movies quickly and gains some additional points based on it's solid soundtrack, Cera's dry humor, and a solid view of New York city. The two leads are both talented, but I typically like more demanding movies. It's worth a rent if you're looking for something light or fall into either of the categories that would acquire a "+1" from the rating.


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Dinner, Wednesday - Saturday
Lunch, Sunday
Dinner, Wednesday - Saturday
About North Street Bistro
Intimate 28 seat bistro serving British dishes with European influences on the North Norfolk coast.
Beautiful food, seriously tasty, warm & friendly service and surroundings.
Super meal, friendly atmosphere and good value for money.
So pleased we secured a booking - it was a perfect way to finish our holiday. Couldn't fault it in any way. Can't wait to return. 🤗
Excellent quality, of both food and ambience.
A real find. Obviously well run with a sensible menu and excellent food. A sensible approach to timed reservations which ensures high quality service.
Five star!
Fabulous food , people , team and decor / environment Without doubt the best place to eat in BM
A terrific meal. The crab soup was amazing!
We had such a great evening . Thank you so much Holly for looking after us
A fantastic restaurant with welcoming friendly staff, delicious food and a great ambience. We were late arriving due to traffic and it was no trouble at all for the staff. The two course meal set menu was very good value, fresh and beautifully presented. Highly recommended.
This was one of the best meals/evenings we have had. Food was excellent - flavours superb. Faultless in all respects. So pleased we found the right place.
Visited for the first time and can see why it is so popular. Welcoming staff, interesting seasonal menu, relaxed atmosphere and reasonably priced. Will definitely visit again when next in the area. Deserves to be a great success.
Fantastic we will be back
Gorgeous fresh ingredients and unique flavour combinations. Service was always attentive and atmosphere was great in the high vaulted restaurant. Excellent.
online booking message that only one table for 6-8 people available gives the impression that all other tables are booked. I only wanted a table for 2. Could be worded more carefully to avoid turning people away.
Amazing food and service
Outstanding food as usual!
Our party of six had a most enjoyable evening with agreement to five stars all round
Food excellent, lovely friendly staff. We will be back!
Amazing wonderful food , great friendly service , cannot recommend enough ,,
Fabulous food. Lovely staff and service. Great atmosphere. Highly recommended
The best place to eat in BM Amazing food Holly and Dan are an exceptional team 😊
Loved everything about our visit to north street bistro. The food was exceptional, the mix of flavours outstanding. We will definitely come back on our return to this part of Norfolk. By far the best food we tasted over the four days we were in Norfolk. Thank you so much
Absolutely fantastic!


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