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- Shipping & Delivery
- Privacy & Security
- Returns & Replacements
- Ordering
- Digital Downloads and Printable Invitations
- Invitations & Custom-Made Products
- Made to order items: Scheduling & Manufacturing Dates
- Payment, Pricing & Promotions
- Product Descriptions
- Copyright
Shipping times apply to orders after they are despatched. They do not apply to your order between ordering and despatch. Production and packing times are not included in estimated shipping time. We definitely prioritise Express Post orders, but choosing Express Post does not guarantee same day despatch.
Please allow 2 working days for despatch (if you order after 5pm, the order is counted as arriving at 9am the next morning. Weekends are not counted as working days). Some items are made to order, and may need to be manufactured or re-stocked. All made to order items will state that they are made to order in the product description. Please allow 2-5 working days for made to order products to be despatched. Same day delivery is not guaranteed unless we have spoken and confirmed this with you prior to your order.
Regular mail:
This service usually takes 2 or more working days from when your order is despatched . Generally, locations close or in major cities are delivered within a few days, while remote locations will take longer. This type of mail is not recommended for urgent orders. We recommend adding tracking and insurance for guaranteed delivery. Responsibility will not be accepted for lost orders that have not chosen tracking and insurance.
Express Post:
Most likely you will receive the goods on the next working day if you fall within the next business day delivery network. Please visit www.auspost.com.au to check if your location falls within this network. Remote locations and destinations that fall outside the next business day delivery network will take longer for delivery. This service is trackable and very reliable and is insured up to $50.00. This service is recommended for urgent small orders.
I endeavour to make shipping prices as affordable as possible. Most orders include tracking, but do not include insurance. When you place an order, please email us if you need insurance. We use Australia Post for all our shipping. All orders are packed sufficiently to prevent damage and can be returned for an exchange (within 7 days of receiving the order) should they arrive damaged.
Delivery of orders are made by Australia Post and not Lava Stationery. Special delivery requests such as "leave at the front door" will not be met unless you have a prior arrangement with the post deliverer yourselves. Requests that we deem unsafe and open to theft will also not be met. The best way to ensure prompt and safe delivery is to give us an address where someone will personally accept the delivery. For example, make sure someone is at home or give your work address or a PO Box address. The customer assumes all responsibility for the delivery address that they provide. PLEASE ENSURE YOU ENTER A CORRECT ADDRESS WHEN ORDERING. If you are using a work address please ensure you put the company name and level. More information is always better than less. PO Boxes are a safe and reliable way to ensure you package is looked after.
However consistent delivery times are in Australia, there are many variables that influence shipping. Therefore, the shipping times we quote cannot be guaranteed. Lava Stationery does not accept responsibility for losses due to delays in shipping and lost parcels by Australia Post if you haven't selected "extra cover".
Our FREE SHIPPING option for DIY orders over $200 is sent via regular mail. If you need your order sent via Express Post, please select the Express Post options. If you would like extra cover on your regular mail, please email us and we will invoice you for the extra cover amount only.
International orders can be sent via Registered Post International (which does not have tracking), or EXPRESS Post International (which does have tracking). Registered Post International can take 7-10 business days to arrive in most overseas countries. Express Post International can take between 3-7 business days.
Personal Information:
Lava Stationery understands how annoying it is to have your details given away to third parties. Therefore, we treat all of your information as private and confidential. We do not pass any of it on to third parties. We will only contact our customers to confirm orders and shipping, or to reply to emails instigated by the customer. We also will not bombard you with promotional offers and discounts. If you want to be advised of these things, please sign up to our newsletter.
We offer the highest level of encryption and security possible, with a rapidssl, verified by equifax, 256 bit encryption SSL certificate. This means you can relax, knowing that communication between your web browser and our web site is secure. Please make sure you see a lock and a green https:// in the address bar when you order. This ensures that your information is secure!
Pictures on our web site:
The names, location and timing of events we use on the invitations on our web site are fictional and in no way reflect anyone living or dead. If such instances occur where these details reflect your personal situation or someone you know, it is purely coincidental.
External Links:
All external links provided by Lava Stationery are a guide only. I post links that I deem relevant to the web site. However, I cannot take responsibility for content posted on web sites that do not belong to us. These sites are able to change their content at any point in time. If I find that external content becomes inappropriate, I will do my best to remove the links as soon as possible. Please contact us if you have a problem with any links that I have posted.
Testimonials are published with from written testimonials only, and do not include any personal information about the author aside from the first name & state in which they live, eg. "Sarah, NSW". You are also able to request a pseudonym for your testimonial if you wish. All testimonials are 100% genuine and come from real customers that have conducted business with Lava Stationery.
General refund policy:
Lava Stationery offers a *7 day refund policy with the exception of all sale, custom, printed and handmade stationery and some pre-cut stationery such as made-to-order pockets. Please choose carefully as we do not offer refunds for over ordering stationery, incorrect ordering or a simple change of mind. Items that are listed as "custom order," "made to order" or "ordered on demand" in their product descriptions are not returnable. Refunds are given as a credit with our website for future purchases unless otherwise arranged. No refunds will be given on printed and handmade stationery. If the customer orders goods incorrectly (ie, correct on the invoice but not suitable for the customer) and the goods have been despatched, the refund is given as a credit on the system, which is valid for 12 months. Please contact us if you need to return any goods. Returns need to be authorised by Lava Stationery before goods are sent back. We will give you instructions on how to return goods once the return is authorised.
Mistakes made when ordering:
Lava Stationery endeavours to send out all goods correctly, exactly as they are on the invoice. Once a customer receives the goods, it is their responsibility to check that all the goods are correct. We must be notified within 7 days of goods being received to rectify any mistakes we have made at our expense. However if a mistake has been made by Lava Stationery and the customer has not advised us of this mistake within 7 days, we will consider the order completed and are not held responsible for replacing the goods.
Order cancellations:
Orders may be cancelled prior to despatch, as long as it is NOT a custom or printed order. Once items are despatched, the order cannot be cancelled and will go through the regular returns process.
Minimum orders:
There are no minimum orders for most popular ready-made products, unless specified otherwise. Other products (such as pockets & die-cuts) are sold in packs of 25 or require a minimum of 50 due to minimums set by the manufacturers.
Unfortunately due to the many requests we receive, I am not able to send out free samples. If you require samples in order to choose the correct colour or to make sure it is the correct texture, please purchase what is available from the "samples" menu option.
Stock Information:
All stock on the web site is listed as "In Stock" to provide back ordering facilities. Some items may not be in stock at the time of ordering. If an item is not in stock, it will need to be back ordered. Customers are notified in their shopping cart if the stock they have purchased needs to be back-ordered and have the right to cancel goods that have been placed on backorder within an hour of placing the order (unless it has already gone into production). Backordered timeframes given to our customers are as accurate as they can be. We rely on these timeframes given to us by our suppliers. No responsibility is taken by Lava Stationery in the unlikely case of blown out lead times. If you need something urgently or plan on purchasing bulk quantities, please contact us to see how much of it we have in stock. If you place an order with some items in stock and other items on backorder, Lava waits for all items to arrive before sending the order out. If you want the "in stock" items to be sent first, then a second delivery fee will apply.
What printable DIY means
All of the printable stationery designs are supplied as finished, non-editable computer files for you to print yourself at home, take to your local professional printer, or simply send via email to friends & family. Lava doesn't ship a printed product. Lava will make the design for you and all you need to do is print, cut & assemble. Your download will require printing & cutting (as well as scoring or hole-punching if you purchase the folding card or tags). Envelopes not included. This is not an instant download for editing at home. Lava will edit the design and send you a final printable copy once the design is approved. All printable designs include a matching backside, with a small logo down the bottom with 'Invitation by Lava Stationery'. Having a guillotine on hand is highly recommended for a crisp clean cut. Some printing stores will have their own cutting service.
Monitor Colours
Colours on screen will always appear brighter than the printed version. Due to different monitor calibrations the colours may change slightly from screen to print. Final print quality will depend on the type of printer and paper used. We recommend that you do a colour check during the proofing stage to ensure you are happy with the colours before the final documents are sent.
Real Metallic Foil?
All designs with metallic foil or glitter are a SIMULATED version of foil & glitter (unless specified). They are high-res graphics that will not print out as actual foil or glitter. Real foil can only be achieved with a hot foil printing press or special reactive foil in conjunction with use of a laminator. If you would like real foil, please contact Lava for a custom printing quote.
What format are the files in?
You can request JPEG or PDF print files.
If you select "JPEG" as the file version, Lava will send you a JPEG without bleed lines / crop marks. This option is best for printing at a photo store or online. You can also use JPEGs to send via email if you don't want to print at all.
If you select "PDF - 1 Up" as the file version, Lava will send you a PDF file with crop/bleed marks. This option is best for professional printers who need bleed/crop marks to trim your file to the correct size.
If you select "PDF - 2+ Up (A4)" as the file version, Lava will send you the PDF files with built-in guidelines for you to personally cut or guillotine. This option is best for at-home printing. Each item will be sent to you on an A4 page. Invitations will be 2up, Additional Information cards will be 2up, RSVP cards will be 2up, 3up or 4up depending on size, Envelope liners will be 1up, Wedding Favour Tags will be 12up, Belly Bands will be 3Up or 4up (depending on thickness) and Folded Thank You Cards will be 1Up only.
PDF files will need to be viewed in Preview (if on a Mac), Adobe Reader or Adobe Acrobat Professional (you can download Reader for free if you don't already have it.) You will need to view files on a computer and not a phone or tablet. Lava recommends for a more accurate view you open the file in full in acrobat rather than looking at it within your email.
Printing with Vista Print
It turns out that Vista Print do NOT conform to industry standard printing sizes. Even though their web site allows you to select 4"x6" or 5"x7" from the dropdown menu, they are not true sizes.
The full bleed size for a 5"x7" flat print is: 7.28" x 4.72" / 185 x 120 mm
The trimmed document size for a 5"x7" flat print is: 7.17" x 4.61" / 182 x 117 mm
The full bleed size for a 4"x6" flat print is: 5.59" x 4.33" / 142 x 110 mm
The trimmed document size for a 4"x6" flat print is: 5.47" x 4.21" / 139 x 107 mm
Not all my designs can be changed to Vista Print compatible sizes, but I can try. Please let me know if you are going to print through Vista Print & I will advise of the additional cost to change the size.
What paper should I use for printing at home?
Lava recommends using a quality thick paper stock for wedding stationery: white, off white or kraft. Not coloured. A very minimum of 240 gsm is best. If you're printing at home check your printer's manual first for the maximum paper thickness it can take. If you are putting pre-cut card into your printer, make sure your printer can print with borderless printing.
This is for personal use only. Sale of this item does not transfer copyright. This item may not be edited or altered; purchasing this listing does not entitle the buyer to resale as their own. No commercial use. If these invitations are showcased on a blog or magazine, please credit Lava Stationery appropriately.
Proofs & Guest List Information:
Printing of guests names and addresses are required to be in a particular format that we provide. Instructions on how to use this format will be emailed to you. All text provided by the customer must be spell-checked and double-checked by the customer. Lava Stationery does not take responsibility for incorrect spelling or grammar with guest names, addresses, times or other details of your event provided by you. Everything must be typed as you wish for it to appear. When the final copy is proofed, Lava Stationery will print exactly what you have proofed onto the goods. If you wish to add extra names or changes to your guest list, then a new guest list must be sent. If reprints are requested there will be additional costs advised by us. Errors that are signed off through the proofing process are reprinted at the clients expense regardless of how the error occurred. It is the customer's responsibility to check all copies are correct.
Production times and Delivery:
The approximate delivery date as specified on your purchase order is dependant on receipt of the signed copy within 7 days of being sent, prompt payments to Lava Stationery and timely delivery of text, information and approval by clients. A minimum of 2 weeks is required for production after the final mock up has been approved and receipt of the correct guest names. Names for place cards, order of service and bombonierre must be supplied a minimum of four weeks prior to the event date. All mock-ups required for production must be returned to us in a timely fashion. Production will not commence until mock-ups have been received. Lava Stationery will not be held responsible for any delays as a result of late of mock-up returns. Production sometimes will commence due to tight scheduling and the client will be informed of this prior to production commencing. Delivery charges are not included. Final delivery prices however will be determined on completion of the job and are dependent on dimensions, weight and location of where the package is to be sent.
Lava Stationery shall not be liable to the customer or deemed to be in breach of contract by reason of any delay in performance, or failure to perform any of Lava Stationery obligations in relation to the goods, if the delay or failure was due to any cause beyond Lava Stationery's control including without prejudice to the generality of the forgoing, difficulties in obtaining raw materials, labour, public holidays, manufacturer delays, war or threat of war, breakdown in machinery.
A 50% deposit of the total quoted price is required on placing an order, or payment in full can also be made. The final balance for all items to be paid prior to delivery of invitations. Any credits or debits due will be refunded or collected on delivery of final products. Payments can be made by credit card, Paypal or bank transfer. Larger deposits may be requested if the nature of the invitations require offset printing or expensive production materials.
Characteristics of Handmade Products:
Variations betweens items are characteristic of the hand-made nature of Lava Stationery products. Fabric invitations may have a difference in pattern variations and sash/embellishment placement may differ on each invitation so that the design can be maximised. Pattern variations also may occur in designer papers. Lava Stationery accepts no responsibility for goods damaged as a result of neglect or poor storage. This includes direct sunlight, dampness, heat, spillages and undue care during transportation.
Any monies paid under an order shall not be returnable in the event of a cancellation by the customer and shall be retained by Lava Stationery to offset the costs and losses arising as a result of a cancellation, regardless of the reason for cancellation. Reasons such as "the event has been called off" are also included as part of the cancellation policy. Quantities cannot be reduced by more than 15%.
Other conditions of sale:
Many components utilised in Lava Stationery products are exclusive designer items that are in limited supply. Lava Stationery therefore reserves the right to replace any component with a similar alternative item should one become unavailable and the client will be informed if such an occasion arises. It is also a condition of sale that Lava Stationery logo or website details are printed on the back of all invitations and that pictures of this work (during and after production) may be posted on social media. Receipt of deposit or signature signifies your acceptance of all the terms and conditions on this page as well as what is emailed to you via PDF.
All made-to-order products such as non-standard coloured envelopes, die-cuts, folding cards, petal cards, boxes and pocketfolds are made within 1-3 business days of ordering. Please allow up to 5 working days for despatch. If it will take longer than 6 business days to despatch your order, you will be notified via email or phone. Lava tries to get these items made ASAP after you order, therefore these items cannot be cancelled once ordered. Please choose carefully when ordering made-to-order items.
All prices are subject to change without notification. Lava Stationery is not registered with GST, therefore all items are GST free. Payment methods accepted currently include Paypal, Credit Card (secure 256bit encryption via the eWAY payment gateway) and Direct Deposit. EFT is the preferred method of payment for invitation orders. All invitation, ceremony and reception stationery made by Lava incur a 2% surcharge on Paypal or Credit Card purchases due to the additional labour involved. This surcharge does not apply to DIY orders. Customers that are not members of Paypal can also purchase via credit card through Paypal. Items paid by via Direct Deposit will not be despatched until the payment is cleared.
All products described on this web site are as accurate as possible. Monitor displays may skew the colour and scale of a product. Responsibility is not taken by Lava Stationery for incorrect choice of product due to these factors.
Copyright © 2015 Lava Stationery. All rights reserved. Unauthorised reproduction of any content on this website including the stationery or product graphics in any form whatsoever is an infringement of the copyright law and is forbidden. All images are original and have been created by Lava Stationery, unless otherwise marked.


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Looking back on the draft in March, it is easy to see where I chose out of necessity rather than the best player available on the board. This is my first time to play in a league with Quality Starts and OBP. I tried to chase reliable bats early, but there are some valuable pitchers that I missed in the process.
I passed on Gerrit Cole for Jose Reyes in round four. I thought that Jose Reyes would be more valuable at SS this year, but his injuries and .315 OBP are not worth a fourth round pick, especially with only 8 Net Stolen Bases. Reyes does not look like a good bet to earn seventh-round value this year and definitely not fourth-round value.
Another bust that I drafted is Jorge Soler in the sixth round. Yes, he is on the DL, but his 19 RBI and 20 Runs are not worth that pick. I could have drafted Kris Bryant or Nelson Cruz instead of Soler, and either player would be a bigger help to my team. I was targeting a young OF, but Cruz's power would've helped my team in Total Bases and RBI. Soler is ranked 894th in the league. I definitely whiffed in the sixth round.
Rounds 7 and 9 brought two more picks of panic. Sonny Gray slipped past my radar in round 7 in favor of Jason Heyward. Heyward's .320 OBP and 23 RBI rank 120th overall in our league while Gray ranks at the tenth most valuable player in We Talk Fantasy Sports. Gulp, I made another huge mistake, especially after having to take Jake Arrieta in the 8th round. (120th overall) I tried to add to my bullpen in the ninth round, but Steve Cishek busted plenty of teams this year. I went from a 30-saves closer to A.J. Ramos' set-up man at best. Gray and James Shields have outperformed both of my players, but luckily I own each in another league.
Andrew McCutchen, as a first round pick, has not lived up to his MVP stats this year. Yes, he is valuable, but he is only the 71st best player in the league, which is thoroughly disappointing as the fifth pick overall. Paul Goldschmidt would have added more power to my lineup and some Net SB.
Every pick in my draft was not a reach. Some valuable players that are part of my team are Chris Archer, Josh Donaldson, Manny Machado, Dallas Keuchel , and Andrew Miller.
Some of the arms that I drafted have provided the best value so far. I waited until the 14th round to draft Archer, and he is ranked 13th overall in the league. His 116 K's and 2.18 ERA help my team on a weekly basis. Keuchel, taken in the 20th round, is ranked 16th overall, and he leads my staff with 11 Quality Starts. His 2.35 ERA and 0.98 WHIP in 107.1 IP have boosted my team in the pitching categories, and he is probably the best pick that I took in the draft. Miller, even though he is on the DL, is ranked 52nd overall with 17 saves. His 43 K's in 26.1 IP gave my team a lift during April and May. Miller was available in the 18th round, and he leads my team in saves, which is not necessarily a good fact (more than Greg Holland, Cishek, and Brett Cecil).
Francisco Liriano and Shelby Miller have offered good value so far, even though their statistics should regress. They have already earned their 16th and 17th round selections, and they have given 20 QS's and a low ERA and WHIP to my starting staff.
The arms are not the only place that I found value, some bats fell my way when I did not overdraft them like Soler and Reyes. Josh Donaldson, a no-brainer pick in the second round, leads the team with 154 Total Bases and 46 RBI's, which is good for the 7th best player in the league. Unfortunately, Donaldson does not have much help from Soler, Reyes, and Heyward. My offense is one of the worst in the league, even though I focused on bats with the first four picks. Freddie Freeman has offered reasonable value, as the 23rd best player in the league, with 132 TB's and 41 RBI's.
Manny Machado's recent hot streak propelled him to the 11th most valuable player in the league with 139 TB's. .361 OBP, 10 NSB and 48 runs. He has earned his 11th round pick, and he has many more good years ahead if he can stay healthy.
Manny Machado's recent hot streak propelled him to the 11th most valuable player in the league with 139 TB's. .361 OBP, 10 NSB and 48 runs. He has earned his 11th round pick, and he has many more good years ahead if he can stay healthy.

subset: commoncrawl


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Artist description:
Tutorial for Kukitto ^:^ ...1st or 2nd speed... Sorry its kinda fast but I hope its still clear -_-" ...ANOTHER THING : facial expression is important to distinguish what type of boy it is (ex: cute guys usually have innocent smile...)
Flash Draw Created Mar 27, 2009 470 x 338px Unless noted Copyright 2009 ForgottenArtist.
We encourage you to submit a comment and let the artist know what you think of this drawing. Please log in or join to post a comment.
Post a comment
Awesome tutorial!!! love it! helped alot!
it helped me a lot..thanks..5\5+fav
this is a cool tutorial! :D its nice and quick xP
i miss the flash drawings :)
i wanna draw the first versio XD i icant draw guys that wel so im studying this *stares*
awesome picture love it like always love your work :D
during the "hair" section i was all, "ooh, that ones hibari! and tsuna! and dino! and gokudera!" X'D
Im favoriting this it helps alot ty ty ty :D
thanks 4 the tutorial! it helps a lot! u draw guys really good! 5h and fave =]


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Nature's Best Low Carb Isopure Isolate Whey Protein Powder - Dutch Chocolate, 3 Lbs
- Availability:
- In Stock - Shipping from Dubai Warehouse
- Shipping:
- Free (Within UAE)
Pack in powerfully pure protein, without packing on the carbs. Our 100% whey protein isolate powders amp you up, without any unwanted weight. Just pick your level: Zero Carb or Low-Carb (which also has ZERO sugar), both with 25 grams of protein per scoop. It's 100% whey protein isolate loaded with vitamins, minerals and nutrients to keep you going strong—and always without gluten, lactose, or any impurities. Made with our complete micro filtration process to be the only completely clear milk protein when dissolved in water. Available in a range of delicious flavors to mix up some seriously delicious and dynamic recipes. Note: Zero/Low Carb Isopure powders have a vitamin/mineral premix which is not soluble; they will be cloudy when dissolved.
Directions : For Zero Carb Isopure: For a rich, thick shake, mix 2 scoopfuls (65g) with 12 fluid ounces of water in a shaker or blender. If a shaker or blender is not convenient, Isopure can be stirred into solution with a spoon.
Notice : Use this product as a food supplement only. Do not use for weight reduction.
|Ion Exchange Whey (Milk) Protein Isolate, Microfiltered Whey (Milk) Protein Isolate, Vitamin/Mineral/Amino Acid Blend (Taurine, Potassium(as Potassium Chloride), Chloride(as Potassium And Sodium Chloride), Calcium(as Dicalcium Phosphate Dihydrate), Phosphorus(as Dicalcium Phosphate Dihydrate), L-Glutamine, Magnesium(as Magnesium Oxide), Vitamin C(as Ascorbic Acid), Vitamin E(as DL-Alpha Tocopheryl Acetate), Niacin, Zinc(as Zinc Sulfate Dihydrate), Vitamin A(as Palmitate), Pantothenic Acid(as D-Calcium Pantothenate), Vitamin B6(as Pyridoxine Hydrochloride), Copper(as Amino Acid Chelate), Manganese(as Manganese Sulfate Dihydrate), Riboflavin, Thiamin(as Thiamin Hydrochloride), Folic Acid, Biotin, Iodide(as Potassium Iodide), Chromium(as Amino Acid Chelate), Vitamin K, Molybdenum(as Amino Acid Chelate), Selenium(as Amino Acid Chelate), Vitamin B12), Soy Lecithin, Cocoa, Xanthan Gum, Natural And Artificial Flavor, Sucralose
|This Product Is Produced In A Facility With Soy, Dairy, Egg And Wheat Ingredients, Peanuts And Tree Nuts.
Warnings: Accidental overdose of iron containing products is a leading cause of fatal poisoning in children under 6. Keep this product out of reach of children. In case of accidental overdose, call a physician or poison control center immediately.
* These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
You may return most new, unopened items within 30 days of delivery for a full refund. We'll also pay the return shipping costs if the return is a result of our error (you received an incorrect or defective item, etc.).
You should expect to receive your refund within four weeks of giving your package to the return shipper, however, in many cases you will receive a refund more quickly. This time period includes the transit time for us to receive your return from the shipper (5 to 10 business days), the time it takes us to process your return once we receive it (3 to 5 business days), and the time it takes your bank to process our refund request (5 to 10 business days).
If you need to return an item, simply login to your account, view the order using the "Complete Orders" link under the My Account menu and click the Return Item(s) button. We'll notify you via e-mail of your refund once we've received and processed the returned item.
We can ship to virtually any address in the world. Note that there are restrictions on some products, and some products cannot be shipped to international destinations.
When you place an order, we will estimate shipping and delivery dates for you based on the availability of your items and the shipping options you choose. Depending on the shipping provider you choose, shipping date estimates may appear on the shipping quotes page.
Please also note that the shipping rates for many items we sell are weight-based. The weight of any such item can be found on its detail page. To reflect the policies of the shipping companies we use, all weights will be rounded up to the next full pound.


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Strand Voyages
From: European Cruise Guide
After 26 years, Strand Voyages (a longtime leader in freighter travel) has phased out passenger bookings on tramp steamers, containerships, bulk carriers, and other cargo vessels. It recommends that freighter travelers contact The Cruise People Ltd.
Strand Voyages continues to represent THV Patricia, the flagship of Trinity House (the UK's General Lighthouse Authority), which services offshore lighthouses, lightships, and navigational buoys and handles maritime emergencies along the coasts of England, Wales, and the Channel Islands.
Cruise line's Web site:
Photo copyright © Strand Travel. Used by permission.
| Europe for Visitors - Home |
| Contact information, disclosures, audience |
Copyright © 1996-2020 Durant and Cheryl Imboden. All rights reserved.


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Brian Leatart
- Yield
- Makes 8 servings
- 3 tablespoons butter
- 4 medium leeks (white and pale green parts only), halved lengthwise, rinsed, chopped (about 5 cups)
- 1/2 cup (or more) whole milk
- 12 garlic cloves, coarsely chopped (about 1/2 cup)
- 3 3/4 pounds russet potatoes, peeled, cut into 1-inch pieces
- 3/4 cup mascarpone cheese* (about 6 ounces)
- Melt butter in large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Add leeks and stir to coat. Cover and cook until leeks are golden brown, stirring every 5 minutes, about 20 minutes total. Season to taste with salt and pepper. (Can be prepared 1 day ahead. Cover and refrigerate. Rewarm over medium heat before using.)
- Combine 1/2 cup milk and garlic in medium saucepan. Bring to simmer over medium-low heat. Reduce heat to very low, cover, and cook until garlic is soft, about 10 minutes. Remove from heat. Using back of fork, mash milk-garlic mixture to paste. Set aside.
- Cook potatoes in large pot of boiling salted water until tender, about 25 minutes. Drain well. Return potatoes to same pot; mash until almost smooth. Add mascarpone and milk-garlic mixture; mash until smooth. Season with salt and pepper. (Can be made 2 hours ahead. Let stand uncovered at room temperature. Rewarm over medium-low heat, stirring and thinning with milk by 1/4 cupfuls if dry.) Top with leeks.
- *Italian cream cheese; sold at many supermarkets and at Italian markets. If unavailable, blend 3/4 cup cream cheese with 3 tablespoons whipping cream and 1 1/2 tablespoons sour cream.
Related Video
Nutritional Info
- Calories316
- Carbohydrates46 g(15%)
- Fat12 g(19%)
- Protein7 g(14%)
- Saturated Fat7 g(36%)
- Sodium102 mg(4%)
- Polyunsaturated Fat1 g
- Fiber3 g(14%)
- Monounsaturated Fat3 g
- Cholesterol36 mg(12%)


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Fast, Fun Facts About the Trucking Industry
- A fully-loaded truck can weigh up to 80,000 lb. or more – most cars only weigh about 3,000 lb.
- Trucks need the length of a football field to come to a full stop
- More than 9 million people are employed in the trucking industry – that's one out of every 14 U.S. jobs
- There are 3.2 million tractor-trailer drivers in the United States
- 78% of all freight carried in America goes by truck
- There are over 400,000 trucking companies in the U.S.
- In 2000, America's professional drivers drove 200 billion miles – enough for 1,000 round trips to the sun
- There are more than 36 million trucks in service in the U.S.
- 61% of trucking hauls are 100 miles or shorter
- Businesses choose trucks for 82¢ out of every dollar they spend on shipping
- In the 5-year period from 1998 through 2002, the size of the U.S. trucking market increased in value by 18.9% to a staggering $468.2 billion
Three-fourths of American communities depend solely on trucking for delivery of
goods and services


text: toggle menuMENU Health and Wellbeing Strategy Consultation The Tower Hamlets Health and Wellbeing Board has to set out how it will improve the health and wellbeing of people living in Tower Hamlets. This will be the "Tower Hamlets Health and Wellbeing Strategy". During June and early July we asked residents, staff and community forums/groups to tell us what they thought of health and wellbeing in the borough. We asked questions like: What helps you to stay healthy? What stops you from staying healthy? What do you think your community could do more of to help improve health and wellbeing in the borough? The Board has used your feedback along with discussions with local forums and community groups to develop an outline of the new Health and Wellbeing Strategy. This includes what we should be focusing on, what we want to happen and what we need to work on to do that. We'd like your views on what's been developed so far. Your views will help to re-shape the final draft and importantly the delivery plan that will be drafted to support the implementation of our ambitions. Please view our outline strategy. We've developed an online survey so you can tell us what you think. This survey can be completed by individuals (residents and staff) or as a local community group/forum/representative body. The survey will close on 31 August. Access the survey: www.surveymonkey.com/s/FNHRBSB.


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Canon offers a dozen digital camera models, from the most basic to the most advanced. We reviewed two 2-megapixel Canon models. The Canon PowerShot A200 offers video (without sound) and a fixed focal length for $250. The PowerShot S330 has a 3X optical zoom and sound recording. The A200's lens is a little less sharp than the S330's, but its images show less blooming in high-contrast areas.
The A200 has a surprisingly full set of features for an entry-level camera. A selectable three-point auto-focus frees you from using the focus lock every time your subject is off-center, and an infrared beam helps the camera focus in low-light conditions. For twilight and night pictures, it offers slow sync, with a slow exposure time to capture backgrounds before the flash fires. You can also shoot silent movies at two quality levels or in continuous mode.
Put the A200 into Stitch Assist mode to line up panoramic images with the proper overlap. (And because the tripod mount is correctly located under the optical axis of the lenswhich is unusualpanoramic shots should mesh without distortion.) Canon's PhotoStitch software will then turn those pictures into perfect panoramic shots. Creative users can select Photo Effect mode with options for vivid, low sharpening, sepia, or black and white.
A fixed-focal-length lens generally provides sharper images with less distortion. The A200 is an exception, however; its lens is actually a little less sharp than the S330's zoom lens, but its images show less bloom in high-contrast areas. You won't notice those fine differences in 4-by-6 or 5-by-7 prints, so the A200 is still a good choice for the point-and-shoot crowd. It takes decent shots and has enough features to stave off the need for an upgrade.


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Pulse producers will see some changes in the way peas and lentils are graded starting in the new crop year August 1, 2019.
The Canadian Grain Commission release says all varieties of peas and lentils (both registered and unregistered) delivered on or before July 31, 2019, will be eligible for No. 1 Canada, the highest grade established by regulation.
Meantime, any deliveries of unregistered varieties of peas and lentils starting on August 1, 2019, will only be eligible for No. 3 Canada, the lowest grade established by regulation.


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Hogan Administration Announces New Electronic Bidding System for Highway Contractors
Plan Saves Contractors $800,000 Per Year; Eliminates Antiquated Paper System and Saves Time, Fuel and Paper
December 21, 2016
HANOVER, MD – The Hogan Administration today announced that the Maryland Department of Transportation (MDOT) will use an electronic system for contractors to submit bids on transportation projects. Beginning in early 2017, MDOT will use Info Tech's Bid Express, a web-based service for electronic bidding (e-bidding) which will save money for contractors and for the state.
"By bringing our highway project bidding into the 21st century, contractors can securely submit bids from any computer, download contract documents, immediately receive any addenda to the advertisement, and collectively save $800,000 every year," said Governor Hogan. "The contracting industry has been asking for e-bidding for many years, and we are pleased this will allow them to spend more time being productive and less time navigating red tape."
The Board of Public Works (BPW) today approved the state's participation with Bid Express, the service already used by approximately 40 transportation departments and thousands of contractors. MDOT previously required contractors to deliver a hard copy bid package to MDOT's State Highway Administration's (SHA) offices in Hanover. Any minor error could result in disqualification of a bid. For the state, the new system is secure, bids include bond verifications, are instantly tabulated, results are ranked, and reports can be exported. By using Bid Express, SHA also saves five days in the process and $68,000 a year because they will no longer need to send documents to Maryland Correctional Enterprises for data entry.
"Thanks to Governor Hogan making e-bidding a reality in Maryland, the contracting community will benefit tremendously," said Jim Russ, president of the Maryland Transportation Builders and Materials Association. "Time spent driving can now be productive. E-bidding saves time, gas and money."
"Each bid costs my company between $750 and $1,000 for document assembly, printing, gas, travel expenses and associated wages to execute this archaic process," said Todd Becker, Senior Vice President of Wagman Heavy Civil, Inc. "The savings using Bid Express are significant, and we are glad Maryland is moving forward."
The Invitation for Bids and contract documents will still be available for free on eMaryland Marketplace (eMM). There are roughly 275 bids on SHA contracts annually. Of those, approximately 150 already subscribe to Bid Express in other states through Info Tech, Inc., an outside third-party company. Any contractor, subcontractor, Minority Business Enterprise (MBE), Disadvantaged Business Enterprise (DBE) and Small Business Enterprise (SBE), supplier or vendor will have access to Bid Express to review current contracts, contract numbers and descriptions and due dates at no cost. SHA will fully implement e-bidding by summer 2017.
Erin Henson
Gary Witherspoon
MDOT Public Affairs


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HP OfficeJet V40 on Windows XP Home. Vista laptop. Let's share the printer. Should be easy enough.
Surprisingly, it is. Especially once you remember to put both machines in the same workgroup. Vista's default workgroup is WORKGROUP and XP Home's default workgroup is MSHOME.
I shared the printer on XP and gave it a name ("Margaret?"). I accessed the share on the Vista machine, connected to the printer and Vista installed the drivers and tells me that the printer is ready to go. Splendid.
So, test page time. The test page says it's printed, it appears in the print spooler, says it's printed and disappears from the spooler. But here's the small caveat: when I get upstairs to the printer, nothing has been printed. Yet there are no error messages or error events on either the Vista machine or the XP Home machine. To the contrary, the Vista print spooler reports the page printed fine.
The print job just vanishes into the ether. Spooky. Sorry, wow.
Fortunately, Google came to my help and pointed me in the direction of this post at Consider It Fixed: Printer Sharing Problem in Windows Vista. He reports on a solution found on the Windows Help forum which also takes you to this post on the Windows Users Group Network.
Those posts gives these steps and fixed my problem of disappearing print jobs. It also fixes "Access Denied" problems when you try to install a printer on Vista shared from an XP machine. Read all the instruction first.
- Add your printer (in my case an Hewlett Packard OfficeJet V40) as a local printer on your Vista machine. Open Control Panel/Printers/Add a Printer/Add a Local Printer and "Use the existing port LPT1:". Then select the make and model of your printer, etc. Do not set up the new printer as a network printer yet.
- After Vista has finished installing the driver, right-click your new printer and open the "Properties" window. Select the "Ports" tab and click "Add Port."
- Make sure that Local Port is selected from the list and then select "New Port". When the "Enter a Port Name" field comes up, manually add a new Local Port as follows: \\computer_name\shared_printer_name as the port name.
For example, if the computer name for the Windows XP PC sharing the printer is "SlimmPC" and the shared printer is "v40" enter \\SlimmPC\v40 then select "OK".
- Now return to the port list and select the newly created port as the active port for the printer.
- To test the printer, open Word and print to the newly created printer.
- If that works, go to some of the above web posts and add your appreciation in a comment or mark the posts as helpful.


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LOS ANGELES – Diversity is not just a nice thing to have but "will be imperative in the future" for companies to stay relevant in the changing global business environment, the leader of an international nonprofit organization told a recent symposium in Los Angeles.
"Looking at the share of global GDP projection, it is clear that the center of gravity is shifting to non-OECD (Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development) countries," and companies "need to work in these diverse environments," said Toshihiro Nakamura, cofounder and CEO of Kopernik, an online marketplace of simple innovative technologies designed especially for developing countries.
Nakamura was among the people invited to speak at the symposium held March 22 by the Global Organization for Leadership and Diversity. It was the fifth symposium alternately held in the city and in Tokyo by the NPO, established by former banking executive Hiroko Tatebe to help foster women as leaders and bring diversity to business and professional circles.
A former United Nations worker who was frustrated that no real changes were being made to people's lives despite the large amount of financial aid being provided to developing countries, Nakamura said he founded his NPO to take a different approach: working closely with those facing challenging lives, mainly women who are holding households together, and always getting feedback on whether the solutions really worked.
As an example, Nakamura spoke of a highly efficient cooking stove that he felt sure would be a hit product.
However, the stove only received modest reviews by users because it required firewood to be chopped smaller, further increasing the already heavy workloads of women.
Consequently, another type of stove that did not require more chopping was designed and got a positive review, he said.
With his experience of providing small items that "make a big difference in people's lives," mainly in developing countries, such as solar-powered lamps for households that reduce fuel costs and cut emissions of harmful substances, Nakamura stressed the importance of diversity and "understanding the unique environment" surrounding the challenges in each country.
On the issue of female corporate leaders, Elizabeth Stephenson, an executive of McKinsey & Co., gave some numbers that she said reflects the current situation of women in the U.S. workforce.
While women account for 53 percent of people who start at entry-level positions in large American corporations, only 3 percent of CEOs at U.S. companies on the Fortune 500 list are female, she told the audience.
"Why does it matter?" Stephenson asked, noting that 25 percent of U.S. economic growth is attributable to women entering the workforce since the 1970s.
Over the past 10 years, 85 percent of jobs created on a net basis were high-skilled jobs, and if the female ratio in the workforce continues at the same dropout ratio, there will be a gap of 40 million high-skilled jobs that are not going to be filled globally, she warned.
As such, having women in key corporate positions provides "prosperity and opportunity for the whole economy," Stephenson said, adding that there needs to be a good program to help bring more women to the top of the corporate ladder.
Aida M. Alvarez, former administrator of the U.S. Small Business Administration under President Bill Clinton, referred to the example of such a program by Walmart, of which she has been a board member for about seven years.
The retailer's female executive leadership council tries to identify high-potential women worldwide, she said, adding that Walmart's CEO meets with the council every month and the board talks about different talents out there.
Hiromi Kunii, general manager of the Diversity and Inclusion Office at Bank of Tokyo-Mitsubishi UFJ's human resources division, spoke of a program introduced at the lender to train women for higher-level jobs.
With women making up as much as 60 percent of the workforce in the banking industry, BTMU realized that utilizing female talent is critical and initiated the training program in 2006.
The project includes having female role models from within and outside the bank come talk to inspire women, Kunii said.
Today, thanks to the program, "a lot of women are in middle management but not yet senior management," said Kunii, who expects that to happen within several years.
At least the bank has come a long way from the days when, as a young employee, she was told by a customer, "I cannot give you confidential information because you are a woman," Kunii said.
The importance of diversity in business was also stressed by Renee White Fraser, president and CEO of Los Angeles-based ad agency Fraser Communications, who called attention to the $650 billion spending power of minorities in the United States alone.
Businesses would be "remiss not to try to figure out the best way to get to the marketplace," she said, emphasizing that "a diverse employer, especially at the executive level, is effective."


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DC Comics licensing of the pulp hero Doc Savage was years in the making, but once the publisher nabbed the legendary pulp icon, things started moving much quicker. From November's "Batman/Doc Savage" special through his upcoming solo series, Doc is making waves in the publishers lineup, and appropriately the big story set to establish both that hero and a host of other pulpy action stars is called "First Wave."
Today, DC released the first color pages for the six-issue series by Brian Azzarello and Rags Morales via their The Source blog. The pages show both the opening sequence teased in recent issues of DC books in black and white and a few other pages shown in unfinished form earlier this year. Azzarello revealed to the blog, "It's exciting to be part of this. Everybody involved has really worked their tails off building this world, and as it rolls out in the next few months, you can expect more than a few surprises. The most important thing for us as creators is to make readers care about the characters. I think they'll find themselves caring in ways they haven't before. It should be fun."
You can see all the preview pages from "First Wave" #1 with solicitations text by clicking here or clicking any of the images below.


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SANFORD—Sanford junior varsity softball player Nicole Richard collected 23 hits in 39 at bats for a team-leading .589 batting average during the past season.
The second highest hitter on the team was Kelsey Doiron with a .500 average (18-for-36) followed by Taylor Worell with a .478 mark (22-for-46) and Kristen Guillemette with a .459 average (17-for-37). Shaina Beaudoin was fifth with a .457 average (16-for-35) and Sarah Scully was sixth with a .460 mark (23-for 50).
Seventh in batting was Christine Tovey with a .441 average (15-for-34) followed by Jamie Bougie who was 11-for-25 for a .440 average.
Next was Emily Marquis who batted .439 (18-for-41) followed by Derryen Plante who batted .420 (21-for-50). Kendra Legere was 11th with a .357 average (5-for-14) and Faith Crosby was next with .347 mark (8-for-23).
Others who batted over .200 included Crystal Cote (.285), Maria Clark (.272), Alaina Eldredge (.264) and Stevie Forget (.250).
Tovey led the team in home runs with four followed by Plante with two and Scully with one.
Leading in triples was Plante with five, followed by Scully with four and Beaudoin, Bougie, and Worell with two apiece.
Doiron led in doubles with five followed by Beaudoin with four and Guillemette with three.
Scully led in RBIs with 11 followed by Plante and Tovey with eight apiece, Bougie with seven, and Cote and Marquis with six apiece.
Plante led in steals with 25 followed by Worell with 19, Doiron with 16, Marquis and Guillemette with 15 apiece, Scully and Tovey with 11 each and Crosby with 10.
In the all-important on-base percentage department, Richard led with a .692 mark followed by Doiron (.638), Guillemette (.621) and Plante (.620). Worell was next (.586), followed by Beaudoin and Legere (.571),Bougie (.560),and Tovey (.558).
Richard top hitter on SHS JVsoftball team
SANFORD—Sanford junior varsity softball player Nicole Richard collected 23 hits in 39 at bats for a team-leading .589 batting average during the past season.


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(I originally wrote this in 1997. I had it up on the old version of the furrs.org website before I took it down and replaced it with the current WordPress-based version. )
Ever been a substitute teacher? I have.
It was the spring of 1989. I was studying toward a Master of Public Administration degree at Virginia Tech, the large state university located in my home town of Blacksburg, Virginia. Having finished my undergraduate studies at the University of Georgia in three quick years and immediately gone on toward a master's degree, I was in a position when I signed up for substitute teaching to work alongside teachers I'd gotten C-'s from just four years earlier.
Or so I'd thought when I signed up to be a substitute teacher. The money wasn't bad, $45.00 per day, and I hoped to get work three or four days a week, which would have worked nicely for me since almost all of my classes in graduate school were held in the evening. It struck me as a good deal: since I had SOME KIND of college degree, I was considered qualified to ride herd over schoolkids in some cases only four years younger than I was myself, and said herd-riding would involve essentially no work and a fine opportunity to engage in power-trips.
Unfortunately, since I didn't have a teaching degree, I wasn't a hot commodity in the minds of the assistant principals who handled calling substitute teachers. If I'd had a teaching degree, I could have worked five days a week and gotten paid more. As it was, since I only had a basic Bachelor of Arts in English degree, I only got called to work on those days when all the teachers in Montgomery County were out of town at conferences.
In other words, I only got called three times all year. Four, if you count the time I got called by two schools on the same day. By the time I started getting calls, I'd given up on getting a lot of sub work and was instead gainfully employed as a student worker at the university library, collecting periodicals and sending them off to be bound. It was nearly as mindless as sub work turned out to be and I could show up for work in shorts and a Hawaiian shirt, so all in all I wasn't too disappointed.
My first experience as a substitute teacher was at the rural high school in the southern part of Montgomery County, Auburn High. Auburn High was in fact a combination middle school/high school, and when I was called for my first- ever assignment, I wound up presiding over a gamut of driver's ed, sex ed, and a fistfight between two overweight teenage girls.
It was a cold, wintry day, the sort of day better spent sleeping until noon, and when I was wakened from a sound sleep by the school's assistant principal, I uttered a groggy "yes" before it could penetrate into my mind who I was going to be replacing: "the Coach."
Yes, I was got to play Coach all day, handing out mimeographed exercise sheets on weighty subjects like parallel parking (in drivers' ed) and masturbation (not in drivers' ed). The Coach had several classes of driver's ed, two periods of hall monitor duty, and one period of sex ed/health with an extremely giggly bunch of eighth-grade boys. Augh!
The worst aspect of my first substitute teaching shift was my utter failure to understand authority. When the kids ignored their normal seating chart and sat near their friends and began to horse around, I made empty threats in hopes of getting them to shut up and stop hitting each other. I was the classic harried substitute.
The second worst part was the eighth grade sex ed class. The boys weren't difficult, but they certainly were giggly and full of nervous energy, and when I opened the folder and found that I was to give them a test on masturbation and pregnancy and other bodily functions, I realized why they'd been laughing maniacally ever since they came into the room.
Fortunately, the assistant principal wandered in "just to check on things" just as things were about to get out of control. I've never seen a roomful of people get so quiet so fast.
The third worst part was the fistfight. The class I had immediately after lunch was another driver's ed class, held in a small classroom in which every seat was taken. This meant that I had nowhere to move troublemakers; I couldn't tell someone to sit by themselves on the far side of the room. The small room also made for a lot of noise, as every squeak, grunt, or cough echoed around the walls. Unfortunately, two of the students, sweaty adolescent females in jeans and dirty denim jackets, chose to sit next to each other specifically so they could continue a running argument on which one of them was the bigger slut (their word). Not ten minutes into the class, as I was at my utter frazzled wit's end trying to get the kids to shut up and just do their goddamn exercise sheet on parallel parking (I had begun an internal, unvoiced monologue about the whole mess, one in which I cursed like a sailor) the girls suddenly stood up and began clawing and shrieking at each other.
At that point, I snapped. I shouldered my way between them (which was an odoriferous experience), shoved them apart, glared at them, and then turned and headed for the door, snapping "you come with me." I didn't even look back to see if they were following; fortunately, they understood the tone of my voice to mean what it in fact meant (that I was ready to start breaking things, including people) and didn't cause any further problems. By the time I got downstairs to the office, my trembling anger had worn off somewhat and I remembered to be startled when I looked around and found them close on my heels, following me in to the assistant principal's office, where I left them and returned to the classroom. I had no further trouble from that class.
That was also the high point of my day: realizing that if you act like you're used to being obeyed, the students will generally act accordingly.
It wasn't a completely bad day; the period I spent with the 11th and 12th grade gym class (in Virginia at that time, gym was optional beyond 10th grade), trading stories about college life and sports with them as they rode bicycles around the locker room, was kind of fun.
I had an even better time during the period I spent sitting in the teacher's lounge having sexual fantasies about some of the other teachers. It was strange, after years of spending lunchtime at Blacksburg High School discussing what color underwear our math teacher had on each day (if you get the impression that she was young and cute and we spent a lot of time dropping pencils in front of her, you're right), to finally be sitting in a lounge with young, attractive teachers who'd reach under their blouse and adjust their bras without a second thought. Unfortunately, none of them propositioned me. C'est la vie.
I didn't get called to substitute teach again (which, after that hellish day, was okay by me) for a month or two, and that time, I was asked to replace a geography teacher at the somewhat less rural high school in the county seat, Christiansburg.
I'd been to Christiansburg High many times before, as a student, due to a bizarre implementation of gifted-and-talented funding in Montgomery County. When I was in high school, all the gifted-and-talented students from Blacksburg High School got bused over to Christiansburg High School once or twice per school year in order to spend the day watching art films in the CHS auditorium. Oddly, the school system only involved thirty or so BHS kids in what I called "Art Film Day," but let the entire student body of CHS in. Since the average BHS student was the kid of some professor at Virginia Tech, while the average CHS student was a farmer's kid, one would think that it would make more sense to show the films at BHS to the entire student body and let the 30 or so bright kids from CHS come over, but no, it had to be done in the county seat. Of course, that dodges the question of what good showing us the same art films year after year was supposed to do for us, but when you found out that the gifted-and-talented programs were being run by a 70-year-old woman who did the job more or less to have something to do, it made more sense.
Anyway, when I showed up to substitute teach that day, it wasn't nearly as bad. The CHS students didn't do things like throwing each other down the stairwells, and that alone would have made for a less difficult day than the day I spent at Auburn, but surprisingly (I hadn't entirely outgrown my Blacksburg-centric prejudices) some of them were actually intelligent. Since I was subbing for an 9th grade geography teacher, my classes weren't really of the salacious sort — masturbation appeared nowhere in the content — and kids didn't get the giggles from the quizzes I handed out. Mostly, they read books, did homework, or talked quietly with me about sports at the University of Georgia.
Unfortunately, the teachers at CHS weren't anywhere near as cute as the teachers at Auburn, and hardly any of them used the teacher's lounge anyway, preferring to camp out in their departmental lounges. That is, those few teachers who hadn't gone off to Richmond for a conference — those teachers who did stick around and showed up for work that day — generally commented that they had better things to do than go down to Richmond for a conference that would be less involved with new teaching methods and more to do with drinking heavily in hotel bars and screwing that hot little number from the English department or that new guy in the math department. I hoped, of course, that I'd be called back to substitute again on a day when the hot little English teacher wasn't in Richmond getting screwed by drunk chemistry teachers after drinks in the hotel bar, but, well, no such luck.
In fact, I was only called one final time to substitute that school year, and that was a day in mid-spring when once again everyone had gone out of town and I was called by two high schools.
It was a sunny, warm Friday. I'd spent the entire night before sitting up at one of the computers in the Public Administration department annex writing an essentially content-free paper on some aspect of government administration which was due at 9:00 that morning; I had nothing to do the rest of the day, having gotten in all my hours at the library earlier in the week, so I planned to turn the paper in and simply report home and go to bed. Arriving home at 6:30 a.m., I turned on the shower, let it run to get hot, and had just stepped in when the phone rang. It was Christiansburg High School's assistant principal, asking if I could work that day since all the teachers were out at some conference.
Now, at this point, as I said, I hadn't been to bed. I'd been up since around 7:00 the previous morning and was heading for 24 hours without sleep. However, I'd passed the point of tiredness and was running totally on caffeine and pure nervous energy. So I said "yes." It was money, after all, and I had nothing better to do than sit in a chair at the front of a classroom and gibber noiselessly at my shoes while the students looked on uncomprehendingly.
Seconds after I got off the phone with the CHS assistant principal, the phone rang again. It was the assistant principal, Mrs. Tate, from my alma mater, Blacksburg High School, looking for substitutes. I'd been hoping and praying all year for a chance to substitute at BHS, mostly to see the shock and alarm on the faces of my former teachers as I walked in wearing a tie, picked up a clipboard, and headed off to take charge of thirty or so impressionable young minds. Consequently, I told her yes as well and immediately called the CHS assistant principal back and invented some lie about how I couldn't substitute after all. Then I got back into the shower, bouncing about with a deranged sort of wiredness that was half exhaustion, half caffeine, and half excitement at the idea of finally subbing at BHS.
Fortunately, my job that day involved replacing the art teacher, a field I was completely and totally incompetent to provide instruction in, so I got to spend a halcyon day waving my hand vacantly at the kids' projects and then nailing myself to the stool in the front of the room so I wouldn't slump and fall off.
That day was everything I'd imagined. When my former teachers, most of whom were still working there, saw me wandering down the corridor looking blankly serious and carrying a clipboard and attendance book, their reactions ranged from stunned alarm to wild glee. The worst example of wild glee was Mrs. Carr, the woman my friends and I had spent four years referring to as "Goody Carr," after the short story _Young Goodman Brown_ that all 9th graders in the USA were forced to read. Mrs. Carr and I had never gotten along, not just because of the way in which I'd refused to do any of my homework in 9th grade honors English but also because of the way I used to toss imaginary objects to friends on the other side of the room all the time during 11th grade honors English. When the poor woman saw the guy who'd made two years of her life total hell wandering in to substitute teach, it's no wonder she came right up to me and told me that she hoped the kids made my life a living hell.
Unfortunately, the hot little number in the math department whom I'd spent the best years of my life fantasizing about (along with every other boy in the class — it was no coincidence that the boys averaged a half a grade point lower in her classes than the girls) was not one of the people who indicated that they were pleased to see me there. In fact, when I wandered by the math department to say Hi and see what her reaction was, it was evident that she had to think for a second to remember who I was. You'd think that she'd remember the guy who never did his trigonometry or calculus homework and who consistently had the lowest grades in the entire class, but apparently she'd succeeded in banishing those ugly memories. It was depressing.
The kids mostly were well-behaved. All of the classes that day that I "taught" involved an awful lot of beating-up-on involving some defenseless lumps of clay. I didn't detect an awful lot of artistic talent, but then again, I was doing well to have a pulse by the time lunchtime came around. I never came close to falling asleep … gallons of black coffee saw to that, but I was about as fried as anyone other than a long-haul trucker running on benzedrine and Waylon Jennings could possibly be.
For some reason, I got asked for the hall pass a lot that day. Apparently the restrooms at Blacksburg High School were a lot more fun than I'd remembered them to be; the kids practically kept a revolving door going all morning going to and coming from the john.
I guess it's no wonder that, early that afternoon, when I saw one bored kid staring vacantly off into space instead of working on his art project or throwing aluminum paint trays around like Frisbees on the outside patio like all the other kids, I simply walked up to him, handed him the hall pass and said "Have fun."
The kid looked up at me and then down at the hall pass again and said "Thanks, Mr. Furr," and hustled toward the door.
I walked back up to the front of the room and sat down on the stool and half-dozed for thirty seconds or so before I realized what I'd done. For all I knew the kid had seized the initiative to hit the bricks and start keying cars in the parking lot or smoking pot in the bathroom (two diversions I remembered spectating at when I was his age) and when he was caught, he'd say "Well, Mr. Furr just gave me this pass and told me to have fun."
Five minutes later, though, he returned, handed me the pass, thanked me enthusiastically, and went back to his seat, where he remained in fine spirits the rest of the period. I never did figure out what motivated me to just give him the pass unsolicited or why it cheered him up so much to have me do so.
When the day finally ended, I was still relatively alert; I wasn't feeling the sick nausea of fatigue which I'd expected to be suffering from by that point. In fact, I was still so wired from the seventh cup of coffee and the excitement of getting to substitute teach at BHS that I decided to go check in at my college department rather than going home and going to bed.
As Arnold Schwarzenegger would say, "big mistake."
I arrived at the Public Administration department at about 3:55 p.m., just in time to find the department head, Dr. Goodsell, going loudly berserk. Our weekly 4 pm roundtable, which that week featured a guy from the Netherlands there to speak about the Dutch public health system, had managed to draw precisely zero students. No one had come to hear the guy speak. Dr. Goodsell was making the rounds of the department grabbing any warm bodies he could find and shoving them into the classroom. I wandered in sleepily, intent on checking my mailbox to see if I had any incoming graded papers or assignments to deal with, and found myself turned rapidly around and frog-marched to a seat at the table right next to the speaker. When the speaker was given the all clear to start a couple of minutes later, the room had six people in it: Dr. Goodsell, the speaker, another one of my professors — Dr. Wamsley, me, and two other graduate students who likewise showed up at the wrong place at the wrong time.
It didn't help that the speaker addressed us in a nigh-incomprehensible whisper, or that he spoke with all the style and magnetism of Calvin Coolidge, but I was already pretty far gone by the time I took my seat and it just got worse from then on. The caffeine had worn off just about the time I walked through the door and the last thing I needed was to be cooped up for an hour with God's own gift to boredom giving a lecture on a subject I neither knew anything about nor cared anything about in a stuffy, hot classroom on a very warm day.
I fell asleep for the first time about five minutes into the lecture. Fortunately, I did not snore, slump over, or begin to drool conspicuously. I simply let my eyes close, as if in deep thought, and then found myself being firmly, but surreptitiously elbowed in the side by Dr. Wamsley after a couple of minutes of blissful oblivion. Ten minutes later, it was my turn to return the favor, as Dr. Wamsley nodded off and began a quiet series of whistling snores. He woke me up again around 4:25 and I woke him up again around half past. Then things got really bad, as both of us fell asleep and woke up with a start that the speaker, off in his own little world, actually noticed. Dr. Goodsell was staring holes right through the both of us but there was nothing we could do. When the speaker finally wound up around 5:10 p.m., the two of us hadn't heard more than a third of what he'd said and remembered even less.
I stumbled, groggy and dazed, out of the room, slapped my face with cold water a couple of times, and made it home less by actual driving than by some form of instinctive homing sense which told my insensible form what turns to take.
It was the end of a very long day.
Unfortunately, I was never again called for substitute teaching. I didn't submit my paperwork for the next school year because I was off in Vinton, Virginia by that time doing my master's internship with the town government, and they kind of expected me to be at work each day. Nonetheless, I'll always remember my three days of substitute teaching — and pray I never have to do anything like that again.


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Wednesday, May 11, 2011
So prison DOES work: Criminals who spend longer behind bars are less likely to reoffend
Prisoners who spend longer behind bars are less likely to return to crime when they are let out, a report revealed last night. Reoffending rates fell sharply when criminals were sentenced to up to four years instead of just one or two, a Ministry of Justice study found.
The report will reignite the row about whether 'prison works'. Defenders of tougher sentences said the study - the first of its kind - showed prison had a powerful 'deterrent effect'.
Dr David Green, director of the Civitas think-tank said: 'This seems to show that for people who merit prison, the longer you keep them there the better. As well as protecting the public while they are there, there is also a deterrent effect on release.
However, the report also provides backing for Justice Secretary Kenneth Clarke, who has criticised the failure of prisons to rehabilitate inmates jailed for short periods.
The report found the highest reoffending rates were among inmates given sentences of up to 12 months and who do not have access to prison rehabilitation programmes.
Last night Mr Clarke said it was a 'national scandal' that nearly half of all offenders reoffend within a year of release. He said: 'Prisons need to be places of hard work, not idleness, and both prison and non-custodial sentences need to do much more to properly address the serious underlying causes of crime such as drugs and mental illness.'
The report compared offending by 'like for like' criminals jailed for similar offences.
Nearly 60 per cent of those sentenced to less than a year behind bars in 2008 committed another crime within a year of release. That compared to a 51 per cent of those given community service. Criminals handed terms of between one year and two had reoffending rates of 43 per cent. But the likelihood of committing further crimes was seven per cent lower for those handed longer terms of up to four years.
Mr Clarke has promised a 'rehabilitation revolution' aimed at cutting reoffending and he wants to expand the use of community service. But critics have branded him 'soft on crime' and attacked moves to reduce the prison population by 3,000 by 2015.
Blair Gibbs, the head of crime and justice at the Policy Exchange think-tank, said: 'These figures - although only a partial picture - do confirm that the longer the prison sentence the lower the reoffending rate after release.
British employment tribunal jackpots face axe: Plan to limit discrimination at work claims
Excessive payouts in sex, age or race discrimination cases could be reined in under Government plans. Employment minister Ed Davey will today float plans to end the tribunal jackpot system, which can see businesses crippled by penalties running to hundreds of thousands of pounds.
And, in a major review of workplace law, he will outline plans to slash the amount of time employers have to consult staff before making them redundant.
But, in a move likely to alarm businesses, the Lib Dem minister will announce that the right to request flexible working and shared parental leave will be brought in by 2015 – much earlier than thought.
Just two months ago, his boss, Business Secretary Vince Cable, indicated that the plan had been shelved. Mr Cable has already announced plans to make it much harder for workers to claim compensation for unfair dismissal in employment tribunals.
Now ministers are to extend the restrictions to claims for workplace discrimination on the basis of employees' race, sex, disability or sexuality.
Mr Davey will announce plans to reconsider awards that 'encourage people to take weak, speculative or vexatious cases in the hope of a large payout'. Payouts are presently unlimited. The biggest was £729,347 in a disability discrimination case. For sex discrimination the top award was £442,266, and the most successful race discrimination claimant won £374,922.
Last year saw a 36 per cent increase in claims for age discrimination, 40 per cent up for race, 18 per cent up for discrimination on sexual orientation, and 20 per cent for religion or religious belief.
The average payout for race discrimination is £18,600, £19,500 for sex discrimination, £52,100 for disability discrimination, £4,900 for religious discrimination, £20,400 for sexual orientation discrimination and £10,900 for age discrimination.
Just one mistake by a small company can see them having to make a huge payout – putting their future under threat. The proposals could risk a battle with the unions. But the Coalition argues that disgruntled staff and their lawyers are exploiting the lax rules to make exorbitant claims.
Mr Davey will say: 'The areas we are reviewing are priorities for employers. We want to make it easier for businesses to take on staff and grow. 'We will be looking carefully at the arguments for reform. Fairness for individuals will not be compromised – but where we can make legislation easier to understand, improve efficiency and reduce unnecessary bureaucracy, we will.'
Plans could include imposing a limit on payouts, or making employees pay a fee before bringing a tribunal claim. The review will also look at reducing the length of consultation over collective redundancy, which currently has to last a minimum of 90 days.
Mr Davey will say this can hinder firms' 'ability to restructure effectively and retain a flexible workforce', leading employers to 'worry about how long they need to keep paying staff after it has become clear that they need to let them go'.
The review will look at rules which protect employees' terms and conditions when a business is transferred from one owner to another.
And Mr Davey wants to introduce rules to make work more flexible. His plans to extend the right to request flexible working and introduce shared parental leave would make it easier to work while bringing up a family.
Munro Review: British social workers 'to face random checks'
It's a start
Social workers will face random checks under major Government plans to improve England's failing child protection system. A review published today will recommend unannounced inspections of social services units in an attempt to prevent a repeat of the Baby P tragedy.
The report by Prof Eileen Munro will also call for swathes of paperwork currently completed by social workers to be axed to give staff more time with families and vulnerable children.
Experienced social workers will also be kept on the front line – instead of being given back office jobs – to take a lead on the most demanding cases and supervise junior staff.
The overhaul comes in a wake of a series of high-profile child deaths in recent years. This includes the killing of Baby P – Peter Connelly – who was tortured to death in Haringey, north London, despite being seen by 28 different social workers, doctors and police officers.
In today's report, Prof Munro, an expert in social policy at the London School of Economics, will criticise the amount of central bureaucracy in the system, saying staff spend too much time "ticking boxes" rather than working in the community.
Existing guidance that social workers must follow is now 55 times longer than it was in the mid-70s, her report says. "Too often questions are asked if rules and procedures have been met but not whether this has helped children. Everyone in the profession can think of meetings and forms that don't actually make a child safer," said Prof Munro.
Her report will call for unannounced inspections of social services units by Ofsted to prevent departments spending weeks preparing for visits. Ofsted will also be stripped of the power to scrutinise official reports into the suspicious deaths of children because its approach is too formulaic.
Greater scrutiny will be made of so-called serious case reviews by making them open to the public for the first time, she will say, although they will also be monitored by a new expert panel.
Her review came as Theresa May, the Home Secretary, confirmed on Monday that the policing body responsible for protecting children is to merge with the new National Crime Agency. But in a key concession, the Government insisted the Child Exploitation and Online Protection agency (Ceop) agency would retain its own identity following concerns that child safety could be put at risk.
Jim Gamble, Ceop's previous head, resigned in protest over the planned move last year warning it was not in the "best interest" of vulnerable children.
Concerns were also raised by Gerry and Kate McCann, the parents of missing Madeleine McCann, and Sara Payne, the mother of murdered eight-year-old schoolgirl Sarah.
Despite the merger, Ceop will now retain its name, operational control and a separate budget and governance structure.
Something Rotten in Denmark (And elsewhere)
Surprisingly, on net, last week was not a good one for the Free World. Despite the signal accomplishment of liquidating Osama bin Laden, Western civilization suffered serious reverses on several fronts.
What these reverses all have in common is a deference to the doctrine our enemies' call "shariah," in a manner they perceive to be acts of "submission." Such behavior is exceedingly dangerous, as it invites our foes to redouble their efforts to make us, in the words of the Koran, "feel subdued."
For instance, consider the aftermath of SEAL Team 6's extraordinary take-down of bin Laden. What ensued was nothing less than a debacle as President Obama's political appointees kept changing their accounts of what had happened. As one wag put it, "Osama bin Laden died and we got 72 versions."
The subtext was of an administration effort desperately trying not to give offense to our adversaries. Yet, they and our friends could only have felt reaffirmed in their already dim view of what passes for American leadership under Mr. Obama.
Then, there was the unctuous effort to dispose of bin Laden's body in strict "conformance to Islamic practice." The fastidious cleansing and wrapping of the body, the 40-minute ceremony and the burial at sea conjure up images of an America treating one of its most psychopathic enemies as a legitimate, even revered figure. Islam scholar Andrew Bostom raises the question whether such rites actually included shariah-conforming denunciations of Christians and Jews? Either way, this exercise was a pathetic act of appeasement.
Next, the President announced that he had decided not to release the dead jihadist's photo. As with the handling of bin Laden's burial, the justification given was concern that the picture's dissemination would only inspire more violence against us and our forces overseas. The truth of the matter is that the more we signal our fear of the violence of shariah-adherent Muslims, the more certain it is to be visited upon us.
Meanwhile, on Tuesday an appeals court in Denmark convicted one of Western civilization's most courageous defenders - Lars Hedegaard, president of the International Free Press Society. His crime? He gave offense to Muslims. Yes, that's right, a Danish judicial panel effectively enforced shariah blasphemy law. In the process, the court violated one of the most cardinal pillars of freedom: the right to free speech.
If allowed to stand, the ruling in the Hedegaard case will be used to abridge fundamental civil rights throughout Europe, and possibly far beyond. Yet, there has been remarkably little outcry about the defendant's plight - most especially from journalists who have as much to lose as anybody.
In this instance, as in the foregoing ones, the West is acting out of fear, lest our conduct become grounds for fresh violence. This is an enduring legacy of, among other things, the manufactured outrage and mayhem over the Danish cartoons a few years back. It gives ominous new meaning to the expression "Something is rotten in Denmark."
Unfortunately, our own judicial processes seem increasingly susceptible to Islamist intimidation, as well. Recently, counter-terrorism expert Patrick Poole published at Pajamas Media excerpts from an interview with an anonymous source high in the Obama Justice Department. These included an allegation that political appointees in that department had "quashed" a request by prosecutors to pursue individuals and organizations listed as unindicted co-conspirators in the nation's largest terrorism financing trial: United States v. the Holy Land Foundation.
According to Poole's insider, the problem was that the administration stood to be embarrassed if this prosecution went forward. After all, the defendants associated with Muslim Brotherhood fronts like the Council on American Islamic Relations (CAIR) would assuredly have tried to use their close ties with government officials and agencies to avoid the convictions and punishments meted out to the first five Holy Land conspirators.
The plot thickened last week. Shortly before Attorney General Eric Holder was scheduled to testify on Capitol Hill, the prosecutor in the Holy Land case, U.S. Attorney Jim Jacks, told the Dallas Morning News that there was no political interference from "the Attorney General or the White House" leading to a decision not to prosecute CAIR. This directly contradicts not only Patrick Poole's source but also House Homeland Security Committee Chairman Peter King (R-NY), who insisted that both prosecutors and FBI agents involved in the case had told him they had "vehement objections" to the "declination to prosecute" memo that came out of Washington.
Congressman Louie Gohmert (R-TX), himself a former judge and chief justice in the Texas court system, pointedly challenged the Attorney General during the latter's appearance before the House Judiciary Committee on Tuesday. Rep. Gohmert noted that it is a matter of record that Mr. Jacks had filed compelling briefs at both the federal district and appellate levels - and was upheld by both courts - in his position that there were sufficient grounds to treat CAIR and others as co-conspirators with the Muslim Brotherhood and Hamas. The AG claimed unconvincingly to be unfamiliar with the particulars.
We need to stand up against shariah, not submit to it - at home or abroad. We must demonstrate that we are, to use bin Laden's term, the "stronger horse," by touting our victories and power, and not convey the opposite impression by obscuring or apologizing for them. And we must see the paperwork that precipitated the declination to prosecute CAIR and its Muslim Brotherhood friends - and then get on with putting them out of business.
Political correctness is most pervasive in universities and colleges but I rarely report the incidents concerned here as I have a separate blog for educational matters.
American "liberals" often deny being Leftists and say that they are very different from the Communist rulers of other countries. The only real difference, however, is how much power they have. In America, their power is limited by democracy. To see what they WOULD be like with more power, look at where they ARE already very powerful: in America's educational system -- particularly in the universities and colleges. They show there the same respect for free-speech and political diversity that Stalin did: None. So look to the colleges to see what the whole country would be like if "liberals" had their way. It would be a dictatorship.
For more postings from me, see TONGUE-TIED, GREENIE WATCH, EDUCATION WATCH INTERNATIONAL, FOOD & HEALTH SKEPTIC, GUN WATCH, AUSTRALIAN POLITICS, DISSECTING LEFTISM, IMMIGRATION WATCH INTERNATIONAL and EYE ON BRITAIN (Note that EYE ON BRITAIN has regular posts on the reality of socialized medicine). My Home Pages are here or here or here or Email me (John Ray) here. For readers in China or for times when blogger.com is playing up, there is a mirror of this site here.
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Northern Virginia Montessori Institute is now accepting applications for the 2010-2011 course of study. Applications and registration materials may be obtained by contacting Northern Virginia Montessori Institute at Belmont Greene, 20300 Bowfonds Street, Ashburn, VA 20147. Interested students must submit an application form, official academic transcripts, three letters of recommendation and the application fee. NVMI welcomes all inquiries, and accepts applications throughout the year.
Admission to NVMI will not be denied based on age, race, gender, religion, national origin, disability, or sexual orientation.