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I walked up to the local community college on a whim. It seemed decades since I first realized that any ...
I walked up to the local community college on a whim. It seemed decades since I first realized that any prospective goals I had could only be achieved through a commitment to academia, but for years I'd lacked the vigor to take any steps toward "realizing my potential." So, as I entered the admittance office, I bore a sense of pride that had been all but foreign to me since high school. After the necessary paperwork had been filled out, I was presented with a number of options for possible courses. Only two piqued my interest: one cryptically titled "Cultural Literacy and Criticism"; the other called "Nathaniel Merriweather's Deconstruction of the Modern Eros." I had no idea what "Cultural Literacy" could possibly mean and, having gone to public school, I decided it was probably instituted for aspiring writers. So, under the impression that I'd have more opportunities to utilize my talents as a writer than as a lovemaker, I opted for "Cultural Literacy and Criticism."
Initially, I was plagued with regret. It had come to my attention that Mr. Merriweather was to have a very strange assortment of characters guest lecture before his class, and the resident prelector of cultural literacy, one Dr. Nayr Rebierhcs, was hardly concerned with churning out the next Shakespeare. For the first few days of the course, I was completely in the dark as to what he hoped to achieve by talking about the "science of wit," "litmus tests for cultural relevancy," and "the tragic dictatorship of media-induced opinion." But eventually, things began to fall into perspective. On one particularly enlightening occasion, Dr. Rebierhcs was instructing the class on effective literary devices:
"We shall begin," he said in his usual didactic bravado, "with the most primitive device a critic must keep in his canon: the analogy. We'll start with a very simple example and then move onto more esoteric selections. Darren Aronofsky's Pi is to independent cinema as Will Cullen Hart's Circulatory System is to independent music." The class reacted to this with varying degrees of inquisition, but eventually came to the consensus that the statement was plausible. The doctor's eyes scoured the room, finally settling on mine.
"Mr. Adickes, can you give us an example of analogy?"
I struggled for a few moments and then thought of Mr. Merriweather and his motley crew of "sexperts." I stammered out, "Mike Patton is to sex as Abe Vigoda is... to sex."
Lovage meets every expectation one would have for an "all-star" line-up, had their preconceptions of an "all-star" group been defined in the 80s with the release of Band-Aid's "Do They Know Its Christmas?" Or was "Heal the World" the prototype Dan the Automator followed when assembling the likes of Prince Paul, Kid Koala, Plug 3 of De La Soul, Jennifer Charles of Elysian Fields, and Mike Patton to create a self-parodying album about doing the dirty? Regardless of where the formula originated, someone needs to crack a window 'cause it's gone bad.
The album begins, modestly enough, with an endorsement from Prince Paul, the Automator's partner-in-mediocrity from Handsome Boy Modeling School. This sets the tone (and, incidentally, the tempo) for the remainder of the record. As flourishes of mandolins and a sampled brass section segue into "Pit Stop (Take Me Home)," the album's thematic developments come to a jarring halt thanks solely to the absolutely wretched lyrical content. All but one song was written by Dan the Automator (aka Nathaniel Merriweather), Jennifer Charles, and Mike Patton, and each sounds like something a cocktail waitress would find scrawled on a napkin freshly slipped to her by a roaming businessman. "I think a pussy's your best bet/ Stroke that shiny coat/ Stroking is the antidote/ Stroke that/ It's a start/ Only for the wild heart." I've listened to this album ten times straight and the genius of these lyrics, which find Jennifer Charles graphically chronicling a menage a trois, has managed to elude me.
The music is infinitely more tolerable, though it occasionally becomes as garish as the album's art, which is horrible even by the lenient standards of kitsch. Here are some basic musical ingredients which, if all mixed together, would give you a fair idea of the Automator's musical approximation of "love-making":
Nino Rota: The Godfather sdtk.
James Brown: "It's a Man's World"
Rene Lalou: La Planete Sauvage (psychedelic interludes only)
Enya: Shepherd's Moon
Massive Attack (if wounded): Blue Lines
Samples about venereal disease
Now that doesn't bode very well, does it? The negativity doesn't end there, I'm afraid. My biggest gripe about Lovage is that it finds a number of clearly talented artists constructing the same song continually without variation. Kid Koala, for one, lays down some nice turntable work, but is never allowed to exercise his full potential. If the mood strikes you, songs like "Sex (I'm A)" and "Strangers on a Train" can be mildly affecting. But the sensuousness of many of these tracks relies solely on Charles' heavy breathing and husky voice, and somewhere around the ironically titled "Love that Lovage, Baby," the potency of her moans begins to wear off. Which is why none of this makes any sense: if there's anything Nathaniel Merriweather hates, it's impotence.


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Well, we have finally done it. A black man may well in fact become the next President of these United States!!!!! I wish he weren't such a liberal democrat! I love this photograph.... A man who loves his wife -- What a team!!!! I hope Mr. Obama really meant it when he said last night:
If we are willing to work for it, and fight for it, and believe in it, then I am absolutely certain that generations from now, we will be able to look back and tell our children that this was the moment when we began to provide care for the sick and good jobs to the jobless; this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal; this was the moment when we ended a war and secured our nation and restored our image as the last, best hope on Earth. This was the moment – this was the time – when we came together to remake this great nation so that it may always reflect our very best selves, and our highest ideals. Thank you, God Bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America.
-- Barack Obama, June 3, 2008
I would really be on cloud nine if a black conservative man or woman were running on the Republican ticket. Perhaps in 2012 Condelessa Rice or Alan Keyes will run. By that time hopefully Black America will have awaken from delusion that the Democrats actually have our best interest at heart and entertain the possibility that Republicans may have solutions which would better serve our community. Social welfare programs are not the answer. Remember the old African adage -- Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day-- Teach him to fish and he will eat for a lifetime..... We need to break the cycle of poverty that has plagued our communities for generations. We need to keep families intact in order to accumulate wealth. Single moms can accomplish great things but how much more can be accomplished with two working together like the Barack and Michelle Obama.

subset: commoncrawl


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A few high schools in New York City are starting to push the boundaries of education, and hip-hop is playing a major role. According to a new report from the New York Times, both Mott Haven Community High School and New Visions Charter High School in the Bronx are allowing students to record and write their own music in class to help deal with issues such as anger and grief. This is just the latest instance of hip-hop and education coming together, and if you remember, back in June, Kendrick Lamar visited with a class after a teacher used his To Pimp a Butterfly album as part of a lesson.
The program is called Hip-Hop Therapy and brings kids an alternative way to express their feelings without resorting to violence and fighting. As the above video shows, the students are allowed to express themselves in a way that they can relate to better than the more traditional ways of education. "When I leave my feelings inside, the only way you're going to hear it is if I throw a punch," Ellis McBeth, a student at New Visions, said. "Now I make songs about them. I write verses that cool me down."
Another student, Jason Alcequiez, said that the hip-hop therapy classes have helped him deal with some serious family issues. "I'm not one of those people who would get sentimental about my feelings and talk about my feelings," Alcequiez said. "I'd rather write it out in music." The programs are already seeing success, as Mott Haven now has a full after-school class that brings in 20 students on a regular basis. You can read the full New York Times story here.


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These Two South Florida Event Planners Threw Their Own Wedding, And You Better Believe The Outcome Was Breathtaking
When two event-designing professionals get married, the celebration is sure to impress.
Jessica Vania Chicurel & Nicolas Hansi Rind
Wedding Date: July 9, 2016
Where: The Addison in Boca Raton
What they do: Jessica, 29, is the event manager at The Addison, and Nicolas, 27, is the event decorator with Daniel Events.
When they knew they'd found "the one": Jessica and Nicolas actually broke up. But, through the trying times and with a bit of fate, the couple found their way back to one another—and never left. "We always seemed to be running into one another," Jessica says. "During that time with all of the unexpected run-ins, I just could not get him out of my head."
The engagement: As big fans of the New York Giants, Jessica and Nicolas bought tickets when the team was playing the Dolphins in Miami. After a victorious game, the couple got closer to the field and asked someone to take their photo. This was when Nicolas dropped to one knee. "After eight years together, of course the answer was 'yes,'" Jessica says.
On selecting their venue: "The decision really was a no-brainer," says Jessica of The Addison. While she's worked for the venue for two years, Jessica says she knew she would get married there for much longer.
"During that time with all of the unexpected
run-ins, I just could not get him out of my head."
The Ceremony: "Floating" place card frames were suspended from the banyan trees outside of The Addison, and the arrival table displayed gifts from the bridal shower and custom wood pieces engraved with the couple's names and wedding date. Jessica and Nicolas said their vows under an unevenly draped Chuppah, like Jessica had always envisioned. "It was very romantic and came out a million times more beautiful than I imagined," she says.
The Reception: Jessica describes the wedding theme as "earthy-vintage-chic." She accomplished this by creating an intimate space with rustic charm, and by using a lot of greenery and succulents, cool stone colors, fun vintage furniture, organic elements and beautiful linens. Having low centerpieces was also important, so that guests could remain connected. Specialty cocktail napkins matched the couple's invitations, and table menus read, "Lets Eat" at the top. "I wanted to make it fun and different," Jessica says.
The First Dance: Agreeing on a first dance song was a challenge for Jessica and Nicolas. "Anything I came up with he shot down and vice versa," Jessica says. One night, the couple was having dinner with a friend named Danny who plays in a band called The Resolvers. "Nick and I were bickering about this first dance song yet again and Danny says, 'I think I have the perfect song for you,'" she says. Danny set the couple up with a recording of a song produced by his band but then surprised wedding attendees when the lead singer, Sahara, made an appearance and sang the song live. "It was so special and our guests were blown away," Jessica says.
Danish Delights: After plenty of Pinterest research, Jessica decided to incorporate a rustic doughnut bar as opposed to having cake delivered to the tables. A variety of flavors including maple bacon, Oreo, blueberry crumb, peanut crunch, vanilla and chocolate frosted were displayed on different-height cake stands and wooden platforms. "My guests seemed to really love it," Jessica says. "I was getting messages the next day from friends saying they dreamt about doughnuts all night."
Honoring Tradition: Jessica and Nicolas didn't plan on having a cake at the wedding, but their friends at Earth and Sugar in West Palm Beach decided otherwise. The bakery gifted the couple a vanilla cake with chocolate chips that was displayed with the doughnut bar and
allowed the couple to take those traditional
cake-cutting photos.
Take Away: Another one of the couple's closest friends owns a bakery just north of Orlando called Le Petit Sweet. So, the company made the couple's wedding favors—French macarons. Jessica's favorite flavor, vanilla, and Nicolas' favorite flavor, hazelnut, were placed at each setting in rustic cardboard boxes.
Behind the Veil
• Gown: Watters, bought at Bellissima Bridal in Deerfield Beach
• Planners: Helene Parsons, Zoe Lanham and Allison Dorlac
• Doughnuts: The Addison
• Cake: Earth and Sugar
• DJ: Custom DJ Services
• Stationery: It's My Party
• Flowers/Décor: Daniel Events
• Vintage Furniture Rentals: Refinery Vintage
• Hair & Makeup: Bombshell Makeovers
• Bridesmaids Dresses: Adrianna Papell
• Officiant: Rabbi Jonathan Kaplan
Related articles
3 Fort Lauderdale And Boca Raton Weddings That Are The Definition Of Beautiful
Celebrity Wedding Planner David Tutera, Who's Coming To South Florida, Offers Advice For The Big Day
These Fort Lauderdale, Boca Couples Got Engaged In Magical Settings Both Near And Far. Here Are Their Proposal Photos


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With meter 188.8.131.52.6 with refrain, it is set to the tune PERSONENT HODIE composer unknown, included in Piae Cantiones, 1582, and arranged by English composer Gustav Holst (1874–1934).
Church choir with organ:
Massed choir with orchestra:
Choir with piano:
LyricsThe lyrics are copyright so cannot be reproduced here. But they are currently available on this website. A rough outline is:
1 Long ago, prophets knew ...
Ring, bells, ring, ring, ring!
sing, choirs, sing, sing, sing!
When he comes,
when he comes,
who will make him welcome?
2 God in time, God in man ...
3 Mary, hail! Though afraid ...
4 Journey ends! Where afar
Final chorus ends "We will make him welcome".


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Anyone who believes in the importance of courtesy and good manners is welcome to join the Campaign.
As a charity with all activities carried out by volunteers, membership subscriptions are one of our main sources of funding for our magazines, newsletters, leaflets, web site and courtesy certificates. By joining us you play a valuable role in supporting the campaign.
Membership subscriptions are for one year and include copies of our magazine as well as regular 'courtesy' tips and the use of the campaign logo on your web site and marketing material.
Individual/schools/groups membership
Current annual rates for individual categories of membership are:
- Individual: £20
- Family: £20
- Pensioner: £7.50
- Schools/groups: £20
- Life membership: £200
Please join now online with your credit card.
Alternatively, please download our membership application form and return with the appropriate membership subscription.
You can also set up a standing order to renew your membership automatically.
Corporate membership
Current annual rates for corporate membership are:
- 1 to 10 employees: £25.00
- 11 to 50 employees: £75.00
- 51 to 999 employees: £150.00
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Please join now online with your credit card or call Robert Zarywacz on 07971 176044 to arrange for invoicing.


text: With the headlines on the internet screaming about how an e-commerce is grabbing the complete marketplace it is quite sure that whether you run online an online business or wants to add an e-commerce-business to the existing brick-and-mortar trade, online sales are extremely important. With this speedy e-commerce business trend, all the business owners who have not yet opted for this avenue will certainly find them customers choosing your competitors with online presence over you. So it is... READ MORE


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If your company has a dearth of resources and wants to set up a custom page or application on Facebook, it becomes necessary to look for a technology partner. There is a big difference between custom pages and the wall – everything on the wall shows up automatically in feeds, while content on custom pages needs to have a "Share" button for users to post on their profile. One limitation of the Share button is that a pop-up comes up for the user to post on their profile – if users have disabled pop-ups, it is unlikely that they will be able to share at all. This makes the wall a very powerful tool, but most of the focus of partners is on the custom page because this is what brands want to use as their "face".
In Dec 2009, Facebook published a list of its preferred developer consultant program, and the site promotes this list as a starting point for companies looking to establish a Facebook presence in partnership with a developer. The list is very long, and differentiation between partners low. Several criteria come to mind when picking the right partner.
Facebook is booming, but this boom will last only so long. Many developer consultants have been launched by very young entrepreneurs, and the longevity of these partners is questionable. While researching partners for my company, "going concern" was top of mind for me. I wanted to make sure that we did not invest in a company that may not be around for long. Since barriers to entry are low, so many developers exist and it is very difficult to differentiate among their services, because they all say "we can do whatever you want us to." Hence long-term prospect is key. The best way to assess this is — for how long has the company been around, who are its clients, who are the founders, and how much investment has the company obtained. Pricing (set-up and monthly maintenance), time to launch, internal and external efforts required, challenges, "click" with the company, proprietary interface, ease of use of the interface, details surrounding changes to custom pages and applications, and tracking are some key factors. One factor I explored was location, since it was preferable that the partner be local.
A freelance can set up a custom Facebook page or application for as little as $500 to $1,000. Larger partners may cost from $20K to $75K to $100K+. I attended the IAB social media event in NY to meet several partners and came away with a wealth of information and contacts. I love all IAB events, and have never had a problem getting a free pass from them. I explored the below developers.
Context Optional: This is among one of the top partners for Facebook, and a friend is using them for her company. They can pretty much do anything you want them to, and given the large number of clients they can come up with good examples of pages. Their fees are reasonable as well.
Always Be Social: I set up a presentation with Always Be Social. The sales team seemed friendly and nice, but it just did not seem to be a good fit. They did not have a lot of examples, so it was difficult to assess their value.
Sprout: I quite liked Sprout's presentation at IAB and their Alice in Wonderland dynamic ads. I got along quite well with the sales person as well.
Buddy Media: They were at the top of my list simply because they have a proprietary interface and a lot of experience in retail. While I felt that their ready interface and high price limited the level of creativity and viral component that we could add, given limited resources on our end and short timeline we did not want to expend much effort on launch. They were the best fit.
Brand Networks: I reviewed this partner as well, but do not recall my discussion. This was the case with most partners – they had such similar services that I could not recall details and differences except with a select few.
Vitrue: Every single partner I spoke to cited Vitrue as their biggest competitor, and seemed impressed with their service. I liked them, but had a hard time understanding whether they were a good fit because of few examples. The differentiating factor here is that using their tool you can use apps on the wall and track them. They also offer localization which is used by McDonald's. I just wish they were able to show me more examples and give me enough "meat" to justify using them versus Buddy Media.
Fluid: I really liked Fluid. Their focus is on websites rather than Facebook, and Facebook services are an extension for their site services. They designed the amazing Timberland's customized boots website. They also use Facebook Connect effectively on sites coupled with product reviews.
Wildfire App: This was an okay partner – not much differentiation but willing to negotiate on price.
Involver: I liked Involver, but what stood out to me is their positioning in the marketplace. They tout their technology as their key product, and have been asked by Facebook to design their Homepage. They kept stressing on technology. But they were selling to a marketer, not a technologist, so to me their pitch had the opposite effect. I am all for technology, but what is the use of spending on a custom page when you don't have a strategy to increase fan base. I was looking for a company that had a strong base for marketing rather than just technology. They do have good clients though, so obviously their model works.
Allurent: This is similar to Fluid in that they focus on website tools and offer Facebook tools as an extension for a small fee. They had good tools, but I liked Fluid better.
Brickfish: I don't see Brickfish on Facebook's preferred list even though they have an impressive clientele. I attended their presentation at IAB. They built a very successful app for Coach. Their services are good, but their sales pitch left much to be desired. If they are able to find sales people passionate about their technology and brands they have worked with, it will make a big difference to their pitch. They have received a lot of free PR – Coach presented their work at the WWD Social Media event – Brickfish needs to find a way to leverage this.


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As I settle comfortably in this new-ish co-working space in the city, I browsed through my Twitter feed and just updated myself with the recent happenings in the lives of the people I follow there. As I went further down my feed, a name suddenly popped into my head and I typed it in the search bar. Her Twitter name popped and I clicked it, revealing her feed; a mix of recent books read and reviewed on Goodreads, a few links here and there, including her blog entries from months ago, and some thoughts on the people she used to follow on Tumblr. I clicked on the links to her blog entry and just started reading. I browsed through her blog for other entries and found a few, relatively recent ones. Reading through them was a bit nostalgic. I used to follow her years ago, and she followed my blog as well. I also thought, man, she never changed. And I mean that in a good way. She's always had a way with words. Her writing always sounded so sophisticated, and her choice of words was impeccable and perfectly reflects her personality. That was one of the things I admired about her, other than her unique and distinct taste in all things, that people may label as being 'hipster'.
She seemed to be living a good life. That's nice. That's good. Good for her.
And then, I wondered then what happened to us? We weren't the closest of friends, but what happened?
Well, I know somehow what happened, but a part of me doesn't want to accept it because partly it was my fault that we don't talk anymore. I was too consumed with my insecurity and naivete. And you, I don't know what you were thinking, and I never asked. All I could think of was that you hated how I seemed like a copycat to you. I never intended to be one, I was too naive of so many things then, and I got excited over things that people like as well. Is that being a copycat? Is that something people should take against me? It bothered me so much for a year or so until I completely outgrew the issue and moved on.
I'm still that person. I still get excited over things that my friends get excited about. I don't intend to be a copycat. I don't intend to be competitive over it. I just like a lot of things, and easily get excited over it. Is that wrong? Is that something I need to change?
Over the years I've struggled with those issues, not wanting to be a copycat, not wanting to be competitive, and it doesn't help that I always had poor self-esteem. I always felt other people were better, and that people had it better.
It's only recently when I moved back to my hometown that I've somehow started being okay with myself. I learned to accept all the things that I've gone through, and that all those experiences were essential to my growth. I also started creating things for myself, exploring more interests, and exposing myself to different things.
Although, sometimes, though I hate to admit, I look back at those memories and wince in embarrassment. Yeah, I get embarrassed by my past self, sometimes. I think we all do. But I accept that person because that person is part of me. The ME, now.
I am okay. I am me. There's so much room for improvement, but I accept who I am. I am continuously growing, taking each struggle in my life right now as a learning experience.
Huh. This is funny. Because when I was starting this entry, I wanted it to be about my nostalgia on writing blog entries excessively years ago, without caring at all about what people think, and now it became, that.
Well, this is a new start of me writing blog entries again. Very personal ones, that is, and not caring what people think (okay, maybe a little). BUT, if anything, this was nice. I feel good; having written all those down.
Those memories are from years ago, and I never really addressed it, and now, I am slowly facing them.
Finally, I can let them go without bitterness.
One by one.


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For NASA's Curiosity rover, newly arrived on Mars, digging into the menu of minerals available on the Red Planet will take a robotic arm, a sleeve full of soil and a NASA-made tuning fork coupled with X-rays.
Curiosity, the centerpiece of the Mars Science Laboratory mission, touched down in Mars' Gale Crater Aug. 5. NASA plans to use the rover's Chemistry and Mineralogy (CheMin) experiment to explore the chemical composition of this area and figure out how it was formed — with an eye out for signs that Mars once had conditions suitable for life.
"If we know the mineralogy (of an area), as opposed to just the chemistry, you can talk about the environmental conditions," Ashwin Vasavada, MSL's deputy project scientist, told Space.com.
A typical CheMin analysis takes about 10 hours and will usually take place overnight, when the rover is otherwise at rest. [ Gallery: 1st Mars Photos by Curiosity Rover ]
Work will start in the coming weeks when the rover stretches out its five-jointed, seven-foot arm to sample a bit of Martian soil, then swallows it as the arm places the soil inside an inlet.
Bigger chunks are filtered out through a sieve, leaving a fine powder that falls into a button-size sleeve with a window on one side.
Curiosity will then shine a focused beam of X-rays through the soil.
"As (the rays) shine in the different crystals in the minerals, one photon at a time, the rays scatter out," Vasavada said.
Curiosity will measure these bent, scattered rays with charge-coupled devices (CCDs). These devices are sensitive to light and are commonly used on Earth in cameras and telescope imagers.
Their use in CheMin is quite different, Vasavada explained. The X-rays will shine on the CCD and produce a particular pattern due to the way the light was bent around the crystals.
Every type of mineral has a distinctive set of "rings" seen in X-rays, almost like a fingerprint. NASA, like any good lab, has access to a library of these mineral rings. According to Vasavada, the library is a similar concept to that of fingerprint libraries used by crime scene investigators.
Space news from NBCNews.com
Teen's space mission fueled by social media
Science editor Alan Boyle's blog: "Astronaut Abby" is at the controls of a social-media machine that is launching the 15-year-old from Minnesota to Kazakhstan this month for the liftoff of the International Space Station's next crew.
- Buzz Aldrin's vision for journey to Mars
- Giant black hole may be cooking up meals
- Watch a 'ring of fire' solar eclipse online
- Teen's space mission fueled by social media
"You search your fingerprint library for what minerals and what combinations of minerals match," Vasavada said. "It's the gold-standard way of understanding the mineralogy of a powdered sample."
NASA has used similar techniques on Mars before, but this time it has devised a way to greatly improve the accuracy of the analysis.
Each sample envelope is attached to a metal strut similar to a tuning fork. As the X-rays shine through the envelope, the strut will vibrate at 200 cycles a second to mix up the Martian soil. Shaking the sample increases the number of ways in which the crystals orient toward each other, improving the analysis.
The vibration also makes a noise: "It sounds like a mosquito when you do it," Vasavada said.
Some of the minerals that could show evidence of what NASA calls "biosignatures" — telltale signs of life — include silica, sulphates, carbonates and phosphates.
With each X-ray fingerprint, researchers can get a little closer to figuring out if Gale Crater once had conditions where life could have thrived.
Visit Space.com for complete coverage of NASA's Mars rover Curiosity. Follow Space.com @Spacedotcom, on Facebook and Google+.
- Mars Rover Curiosity: Mars Science Lab Coverage
- Gallery: Mars Rover Curiosity Landing Success
- Curiosity's Deck Littered With Un-Expected Debris | Video
© 2013 Space.com. All rights reserved. More from Space.com.


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Tri-Mountain Men's Contrasting Trim Microfiber Windshirt. What is a windshirt? Simply put, a wind shirt is a thin lightweight pullover or jacket that protects against the wind. Perfect for blustery fall days and it can be layered over a fleece for extra warmth to maintain body heat. Our Tri-Mountain brand combines their well known quality construction with great looking style. Made of extra soft windproof All Season micro fiber polyester, it sports contrasting trim for a fashionable appearance. Fully lined with lightweight polyester, two side seam pockets keep hands out of the wind and carry keys, wallets, or cell phones. A ribbed crossover collar, cuffs, and waistband finish rounding out the up to date look. This classy windshirt is great for hikers and campers or for just looking great any where.
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Note: Above size XL these sizes are on the smaller of the numeric equivalent for each size. i.e. 2XL is 52, 3XL is 56, 4X is 60 etc. If you are on the larger side of a size we suggest you purchase the next size bigger.


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The judges' unanimous ruling in the closely watched case was followed by activists' vows to appeal. Many in Kenya's vibrant gay community had hoped the court would make history by scrapping the British colonial-era laws and inspiring other countries in Africa to do the same.
Activists argue that the laws criminalizing consensual same-sex relations between adults are in breach of the constitution because they deny basic rights. The state should not regulate intimacy between gay couples, they say.
One law punishes "carnal knowledge against the order of nature" and prescribes up to 14 years in prison for people convicted of homosexual acts. Another says "indecent practices between males" can bring up to five years in prison.
The laws create an environment of fear and harassment even if they are not always enforced, activists say. "The issue is violence, discrimination and oppression," one activist, Tirop Salat, said.
The judges, however, said the petitioners had failed to prove how the laws violated their right to health, dignity and privacy and said the laws do not single out gay people. Kenya has no social pressure to legalize homosexuality, they added.
"Acknowledging cohabitation among people of the same sex, where they would ostensibly be able to have same-sex intercourse, would indirectly open the door for (marriage) of people of the same sex," said the judgment read in part by Justice Roselyn Aburili.
Reaction was swift.
"These old colonial laws lead to the LGBT community suffering violence, blackmail, harassment and torture. They devastate people's lives and have no place in a democratic Kenyan society," the Nairobi-based National Gay & Lesbian Human Rights Commission said after the decision was announced.
Lawyer Paul Muite for the commission, the main petitioner in the case, said they would appeal.
At least half of Kenya's LGBT persons in Kenya have suffered physical and verbal assault, the commission says. Most assaults are not reported because people don't have confidence that police will protect them, activists say.
In a separate statement, the organization Stonewall UK called the decision "crushing news" and said some 70 countries around the world still criminalize same-sex relationships.
Thirty-three of those are in Africa, according to Human Rights Watch, which called Friday's ruling "a step backward in the progress Kenya has made toward equality in recent years."
Some in Kenya, however, praised the decision as a strike against what they called "sexual perversion." Gerald Walterfang with the Kenya Christian Professionals Forum said they were delighted with the ruling against a "destructive sexual lifestyle" and called the case "an attempt to sanitize what is illicit."
Kenyan Bishop Alfred Rotich added: "LGBT is an orientation. You cannot legalize something as an orientation. If somebody has an orientation to steal money, we cannot legalize it."
Kenya's courts had recently ruled in favor of LGBT rights.
Last year, an appeals court ruled unlawful the use of forced anal exams to test whether two men had gay sex. In 2015, High Court judges ordered a government agency to register a rights group representing gay people, saying Kenya's constitution recognizes and protects the rights of minorities.
Resistance to gay rights exists at the top of Kenya's politics, however.
Gay rights are "not of any major importance," President Uhuru Kenyatta told CNN in an interview last year . He said the laws criminalizing same-sex relations are supported by "99 percent" of the Kenyan people.
The activist who filed the first petition against the laws in 2016, Eric Gitari, told The Associated Press after Friday's decision that "we are worried that this is going to embolden people who do not like LGBT people in Kenya and give them justification to act arbitrarily in harming people. The apprehension of increased violence is very reasonable. What will happen is that more and more people are going to closet themselves, they are going to live in shame and fear."
Follow Africa news at https://twitter.com/AP_Africa
Copyright 2019 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.


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How to Treat a Urinary Tract Infection
Explore this Article Getting Medical Treatment Relieving Discomfort Preventing UTIs from Returning Article Summary Questions & Answers Related Articles References
There are 19 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
You don't really think much about the importance of your urinary tract when you go to the bathroom. However, when you have a urinary tract infection (UTI), you probably have a hard time thinking about anything else. Since men and women with UTIs need antibiotics, you'll need to get an exam, dipstick urinalysis, and prescription. Then you can use natural methods to relieve the UTI pain at home and prevent it from coming back.
Getting Medical Treatment
1Pay attention to pain when you urinate or to changes in your urine. If bacteria in your urethra and bladder are causing an infection, you'll begin to experience pain or difficulty urinating. You might feel like you frequently need to urinate, but little or no urine comes out. Other signs of a urinary tract infection (UTI) include:[1]
- Burning sensation when you urinate
- Pain or aching in your abdomen
- Cloudy, unusually colored (dark yellow or greenish), or smelly urine
- Feeling tired or sick
2Get emergency medical attention if you have a kidney or prostate infection. If you've had signs of a UTI for several days or weeks without getting treatment, the infection can travel to your kidneys. If you're a man with an untreated UTI, it can spread to your prostate. If you experience these signs of a kidney or prostate infection, go to an urgent care clinic or get emergency medical attention:[2]
- Pain in the sides or low back
- Fever or chills
- Nausea
- Vomiting
- Diarrhea
- Pain when urinating
3Get a medical examination as soon as you can. Contact your doctor if you show any signs of a UTI. The doctor will get your medical history and ask about your symptoms. They'll also collect a sample of urine to test for bacteria in order to diagnose your UTI and determine treatment.[3]
- The doctor may do a rectal exam, if they believe your prostate could be infected.
- The doctor may do a pelvic exam if there is a discharge coming from your vagina that has an odor. This will help them to rule out a cervical infection.[4]
- If you've had several UTIs or a complicated infection, the doctor might order images of your urinary tract to rule out kidney stones or blockages.
4Take the full course of prescription antibiotics. Your doctor will prescribe antibiotics to treat the bacteria causing your UTI. Follow the dosing instructions and don't stop taking the medication even once your symptoms start to improve. It's important to take the full course so the bacteria doesn't return.[5]
- Ask your doctor about any side effects of the antibiotics and whether you should avoid drinking alcohol during treatment.
- If you have a history of vaginitis, ask your doctor about yeast infection prevention with a combination of antibiotics and antifungal medication.
5Call your doctor if you don't notice improvements within 2 days. You should begin feeling relief after taking antibiotics for a day or two, but contact the doctor if you don't. You may need an adjustment to your medication or the infection may be caused by something else and require different treatment.[6]
Relieving Discomfort
1Take over-the-counter (OTC) pain relief for fever and pain. You may want to take OTC pain relief for the first day or two of treatment until the antibiotics take effect. These can make urinating more comfortable and relieve your fever.[7]
- Avoid taking ibuprofen or aspirin if you have a kidney infection, because these can cause complications.
- Do not take pyridium or phenazopyridine until after you have seen your doctor. These oral pain medications are available over-the-counter as treatment for a UTI, but they can color your urine orange and this will invalidate the results of your test.
2Increase your fluid intake. Both during a UTI and after, you need lots of fluids to flush out the infection and to keep you hydrated. Drinking at least 6 to 8 8-ounce (236 ml) glasses of fluids a day. You can drink water, herbal or decaf tea, or water with lemon.[8]
- While cranberry juice has long been thought to treat or prevent UTIs, research has shown that it's an ineffective treatment and there's little evidence that it prevents UTIs.[9]
- Avoid alcohol, sugary drinks, and caffeine, which can irritate your bladder.
3Place a heating pad over your pelvic area. Put the heating pad or a hot water bottle on your lower abdomen, back, or between your thighs. The gentle heat may provide some pain relief.[10]
4Urinate when you feel like you need to. Avoid holding your urine even if it still hurts to urinate. Urinating when you need to will help flush the bacteria out of your urinary tract. Drinking lots of fluids will dilute the urine so it doesn't sting as much when you urinate.[11]
5Soak in a warm vinegar or baking soda bath. Fill a tub with warm water and pour in 1⁄4 cup (59 ml) of white vinegar or 2 ounces (60 ml) of baking soda (if you haven't reached puberty). The vinegar or baking soda water can relieve pain and remove germs near the entrance to the urinary tract.[12]
- If you don't have a tub, you can fill a small sitz bath. Sit in the sitz bath so bottom is submerged in the vinegar or baking soda water. Keep in mind that you'll only need to add a few tablespoons of vinegar or baking soda for a small sitz bath.
Preventing UTIs from Returning
1Urinate frequently to prevent a bladder infection. Make sure that you are taking in enough fluids to urinate frequently and always urinate as soon as you feel like you need to. Urinating flushes germs from your urinary tract system, which can speed up healing time for a UTI or prevent bladder infections in the first place.[13]
- Learn forward slightly when you've finished urinating to ensure that your bladder is completely empty.
2Urinate after sexual intercourse. Because sex can introduce germs to the entrance of your urinary tract, it's important to urinate right after sex. Don't lay in bed and wait to go or bacteria will have a better chance of traveling through your urinary tract.[14]
3Take showers instead of baths. If you've washed yourself and the bathwater becomes dirty, soaking in the bath can introduce bacteria to the entrance of your urinary tract. You should also avoid sitting around in wet bathing suits or a hot tub. When you shower, avoid using heavily fragranced soaps, cleansers, sprays, or douches.[15]
- You should also avoid using scented feminine hygiene problems because these can irritate your urinary tract.
4Wipe from front to back after you use the toilet. Avoid using the same paper to wipe towards the front. Instead, wipe from front to back so you don't introduce germs into the urethral opening. Discard the wiping paper after each wipe. Remember to wash your hands to prevent UTIs and spreading other illnesses.[16]
- If your hands get dirtied with fecal matter, wash them before wiping again (it is fecal bacteria, E. coli that is the culprit in 80 to 95 percent of UTIs).
5Wear loose cotton underwear. To keep the genital area dry, wear cotton underwear that won't trap moisture. Choose underwear that's loose and won't chafe against your genitals. For example, choose loose boxers instead of briefs.[17]
- It's important to change your underwear every day to prevent germs from traveling to your urinary tract.
6Drink 250 mL (1 cup) of cranberry juice 3 times daily. Drinking cranberry juice regularly can help to prevent UTIs in women who have them frequently. You can also take cranberry in the form of a 400 mg tablet once per day.[18]
Community Q&A
QuestionIs it normal to see small blood clots if I have a urinary tract infection?Luba Lee, FNP-BCLuba Lee, FNP-BC is a Board Certified Family Nurse Practitioner (FNP) and educator in Tennessee with over a decade of clinical experience. Luba has certifications in Pediatric Advanced Life Support (PALS), Emergency Medicine, Advanced Cardiac Life Support (ACLS), Team Building, and Critical Care Nursing. She received her Master of Science in Nursing (MSN) from the University of Tennessee in 2006.
Medical Review BoardMedical Review BoardExpert AnswerWhile blood in your urine may mean you have a UTI, it also might be a sign of more significant disease. Follow up with your doctor for a proper evaluation.
QuestionCan I pass it on to my unborn child?Community AnswerIt can't be passed on. A UTI is not an inherited disease or an infectious one.
QuestionCould an itchy vagina mean a UTI?Community AnswerIt could. However, lots of itch, accompanied with milky discharge and occasionally peeling down below, is usually a yeast infection.
QuestionHow do I prevent peeing when I have a urinary tract infection?Community AnswerYou shouldn't! It could cause more problems if you do not urinate.
QuestionIs trimethoprim suitable for a urinary infection?Community AnswerIt worked for me the last time I had a UTI. I was in so much pain and I felt better after a couple of days.
QuestionWhen I take my first dose, do I have to wait for four hours before taking the next dose?Community AnswerYou should always follow the directions on any medication. Not following them could result in medical issues.
QuestionIs there any other way to get rid of infections quicker?Community AnswerDrink peppermint tea with minced garlic and lemon. Garlic is a natural antibiotic. Then drink a glass of water with half a teaspoon of baking soda. Repeat. If after two days there is no relief at all, visit your doctor or ER.
QuestionHow can I tell if I have a UTI or a yeast infection?Community AnswerA UTI will feel more like razor blades are coming out of your urethra. When you have a yeast infection, your whole vaginal area will be irritated. It can burn when you pee if you have a yeast infection, but that's because the area is irritated. A yeast infection will also be accompanied by a thick vaginal discharge and itching.
QuestionCan I buy antibiotics?Community AnswerNo. Antibiotics are typically given on a prescription basis (especially in the USA). This is to prevent abuse and eventual desensitization of germs to the medicines. If you feel that you might need some antibiotics, schedule an appointment with your doctor. He or she will then prescribe some antibiotics to you, or recommend a different treatment.
QuestionIf wiping is so risky, why don't babies and elderly people who wear diapers get contaminated?Community AnswerThey often do. That's why UTIs and bladder infections are common in these populations.
is apple cider vinegar helpful for a UTI?
What medicine do I take for a UTI? What over the counter medicine will help?
- Over-the-counter UTI products are usually test strips or analgesics. While these can help determine if you have a UTI and relieve pain, they won't treat the cause of the infection.
- Avoid drinking diluted baking soda for your UTI since it's not an effective treatment and can cause toxic overdose when misused.[19]
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-tract-infections-utis/
- ↑ https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/urologic-diseases/kidney-infection-pyelonephritis/symptoms-causes
- ↑ https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/urologic-diseases/bladder-infection-uti-in-adults/diagnosis
- ↑ https://www.aafp.org/afp/2006/0115/p293.html
- ↑ https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/urologic-diseases/bladder-infection-uti-in-adults/treatment
- ↑ https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/urologic-diseases/bladder-infection-uti-in-adults/treatment
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-tract-infections-utis/
- ↑ https://obgynwc.com/dos-donts-uti/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24310806
- ↑ https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/urologic-diseases/bladder-infection-uti-in-adults/treatment
- ↑ http://kidshealth.org/en/kids/uti.html
- ↑ http://www.seattlechildrens.org/medical-conditions/symptom-index/urinary-tract-infection-female/
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-tract-infections-utis/
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-tract-infections-utis/
- ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/antibiotic-use/community/for-patients/common-illnesses/uti.html
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-tract-infections-utis/
- ↑ https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/urologic-diseases/bladder-infection-uti-in-adults/treatment
- ↑ https://www.aafp.org/afp/2008/0801/p332.html
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24313600
Article SummaryX
To treat a urinary tract infection, it's important that you visit your doctor so they can diagnose you and prescribe you antibiotics. Make sure you take the full course of antibiotics you're prescribed, even if you start to feel better before you've taken them all. While you're waiting for your infection to subside, try applying a heating pad to your lower abdomen or between your thighs to help alleviate some of the pain. You can also take a bath with warm water and 1/4 cup of white vinegar to relieve pain. To learn how to prevent a urinary tract infection from returning, scroll down.
Article Info
Categories: Featured Articles | Urinary Tract Infections
In other languages:
Italiano: Curare un'Infezione del Tratto Urinario, Español: tratar una infección del tracto urinario, Português: Tratar Infecção da Via Urinária, Deutsch: Harntraktinfektionen behandeln, Français: traiter une infection urinaire, Русский: лечить инфекции мочевыводящих путей, 中文: 治疗尿路感染, Nederlands: Urineweginfectie behandelen, Čeština: Jak léčit zánět močových cest, Bahasa Indonesia: Mengobati Infeksi Saluran Kemih, العربية: علاج عدوى المسالك البولية, Tiếng Việt: Điều trị nhiễm trùng đường tiểu, ไทย: รักษาโรคติดเชื้อทางเดินปัสสาวะ


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Start Over with Job Search
Returning Applicant? Login Now
Live where you work for free!!! No commuting expenses or dealing with rush hour traffic! No rent and minimal utility expenses! We are currently seeking an experienced, outgoing and friendly Maintenance Technician!
The Standby Maintenance Technician is responsible for maintaining and repairing the physical assets of the apartment buildings. The right candidate must possess the ability to complete emergency service requests at an apartment community immediately, and all standard service requests within 24-hours, excluding weekends.
Standby Maintenance Technicians must live on-site in a company-provided apartment, in return for being available to respond to after-hours emergency calls on a rotating basis. This position requires the ability to complete all work orders assigned according to company policies and procedures. Maintenance Technicians are required to have an understanding of hazardous communication, bloodborne pathogens, pool contamination, hand tools, electricity, fire, ladder, and lock-out safety. We are looking for team players who are energetic, friendly, skilled, diligent, and detail-oriented.
Additional job responsibilities:
This position requires you to enter occupied units; therefore employees are required to be honest and trustworthy with a satisfactory background. A valid driver's license and reliable transportation will be required as this position will entail the operation of a personal and potentially a company vehicle.


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Aardman is a company that feels very nostalgic to me. I remember watching A Grand Day Out with my dad as a child and then later The Wrong Trousers and A Close Shave. Me my dad and my big brother all laughing along together and my dad making impersonations of Wallace for days. Moving to Bristol at 22 it was one of the subjects of topic whenever I mentioned the city and as it's a city I very much call home I feel proud of it as much as the other locals do.
I'd never actually visited the studios however so when DFS got in touch and asked if I'd like to come along and see some behind the scenes of their latest ad I was really eager to join them. Aardman and DFS have teamed up to create a number of beautiful animations as their latest TV ads. You may have seen some of them already but we were shown around with the members from DFS that actually feature in the ad launching today. It was also the DFS designers first time of seeing the ad and also seeing the models of themselves that star in them! How amazing would it be to get an Aardman character of yourself??
This is a little 'on set' behind the scenes image. It was so interesting to hear about the process behind making these little animations and all the animations they make at Aardman. The below picture is from some of the mouths used to create the scenes where the characters are talking.
That model is how all the characters start out!
Aardman even created tiny little replicas of the DFS sofas, they literally copied every little detail that DFS use but in miniature. It was really interesting to hear how the real sofas are made and the handmade in the UK element of them. It actually made me realise how handmade and homegrown a company they are. This is a picture of me and Donna from The London Mum with the three DFS designers who had themselves made by Aardman and feature in the ad. If you've not seen them so far they are filmed in a 'Creature Comfort' style where the voiceovers are not scripted and are just natural things that they said. I think it makes for a really lovely style and emphasis the home grown/home made ethos that DFS have.
I loved hearing about how Aardman have someone who will go around Bristol sourcing different pieces of fabric for the clothes and how the mood boards are created. DFS make half of their sofas by hand in the UK so I felt like the process was sort of similar. You can tell just how passionate both companies are about their work and it makes for a really lovely collaboration.
You can see their latest ad below!
In association with DFS


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"Breaking Through the Earth." for One Word 365, 18 March 2014.
"Into Orthodoxy: Into Eternity." for David J Dunn, 4 April 2013.
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"Christmas Heroes." for Momma Be Thy Name, 22 Dec 2011.


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Cape Town Caravan Parks and Camping Sites
34 results for Caravan Parks and/or Camping Sites in Cape Town.
AfriCamps at Pat Busch Mountain Reserve
Bergendal Farm, Bergendal Road, ROBERTSON, 6705, Breede River Valley, Western Cape, South Africa
AfriCamps at Pat Busch Mountain Reserve offers spacious luxury tented accommodation in Robertson. AfriCamps tents sleep up to five guests each in two bedrooms. The main bedroom has a queen size bed and the ...
Bonnievale River Lodge
Angora Road, BONNIEVALE, 6730, Breede River Valley, Western Cape, South Africa
We offer camp sites alongside the Breede River. All sites have electricity and there are hot water ablutions and a communal kitchen. There is a beautiful swimming pool set in the vineyard which is available for all guests to ...
More \ About Bonnievale River Lodge
Dwarsberg Trout Hideaway
RAWSONVILLE, 6845, Breede River Valley, Western Cape, South Africa
The seven campsites on the banks of the river can accommodate groups of 15 to 20 people, per campsite. The exclusive camp sites are equipped with ablution facilities, warm water and five sites have ...
Fynbos Guest Farm
1 Boontjiesrivier Road, WOLSELEY, 6830, Breede River Valley, Western Cape, South Africa
There are nine private, lovely camping and caravanning sites, each with an electrical point and braai area. There is also an ablution block, communal braai area and small fridge as well as two small plunge ...
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Kaleo Guest Farm
Malabar Farm, Koue Bokkeveld, CERES, 6835, Breede River Valley, Western Cape, South Africa
The luxury campsites have a private ablution block, braai and kitchenette area. They are made to cater for maximum of six people per campsite. These sites are ideal for those campers wishing to enjoy the peaceful ...
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AfriCamps at Kam'Bati
Jubileeskraal, SWELLENDAM, 6740, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Each of the five large tents sleeps five guests in two bedrooms. One of the bedrooms has a Queen-size bed and the other bedroom has a Queen-size bed and a single bed. There is one bathroom with a shower per ...
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AfriCamps at Stanford Hills
STANFORD Hills Estate, Weltevreden Farm, STANFORD, 7210, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Each tent sleeps five guests in two bedrooms. The first room has a Queen-size bed and the second room has a Queen-size bed with a single bunk bed above it. There is one bathroom with a shower per ...
Brackenhills Private Nature Reserve
Grootvadersbosch Nature Reserve, HEIDELBERG, 1441, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
The four stylish tented lodges are situated high up in the Langeberg Mountains bordering the beautiful and peaceful Grootvadersbosch forests. Swim in the pools in the river gorge; take a guided forest ...
Cherry Glamping
Groenrug Estate, ELGIN, 7180, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
We offer 12 luxury tents each sleeping two adults and two children. There is a lapa and braai area where you can sit and enjoy magnificent views of the valley. There is a fully equipped kitchen available for your use ...
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Greyton Ecolodge
2 Park Road, GREYTON, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Greyton Ecolodge is a renovated School Hostel. Colourful and spacious, we guarantee no chocolates on the pillows. However we do guarantee hot water, clean rooms, friendly service and the best views in Greyton from your bed ...
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Khomeesdrif Camping Site
Kleinplasie, 5km on the R406, 2km outside RIVIERSONDEREND, 7250, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Khomeesdrif Campsite is situated at the edge of a poplar forest and boasts 30 grassed and shaded sites and a spotless ablution block with solar powered hot showers backed up by gas, flush toilets and is wheelchair ...
Klein Vlei Hermanus
R43, Prawn Flats, HERMANUS, 7200, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Kleinvlei is situated in Hermanus right next to the lagoon with 180 degree panoramic views to the South of the lagoon with its abundance bird life. Klein Vlei Hermanus offers a choice of accommodation including camping ...
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Lang Elsie's Kraal Rest Camp
5 km off the N2, SWELLENDAM, 6740, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Lang Elsie's Kraal Rest Camp in the Bontebok National Park is able to accommodate up to 266 guests in 50 different units. Lang Elsie's Kraal Rest Camp is located approximately six kilometers from Swellendam. Due to the size ...
Opstal Camp Rondawels
DE HOOP Nature Reserve, Bredasdorp, Cape Agulhas, Western Cape, South Africa
These five campsite rondawels are thatched cottages with two beds, outdoor shared showers and toilets. Bbraai area, but no other kitchen facility. These chalets are a great base among the diverse fauna and flora. There are ...
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Platbos Forest Cabins
Baviaanspoort Hills, GANSBAAI, 7220, Cape Overberg, Western Cape, South Africa
Platbos Forest offers self catering accommodation in an indigenous forest found on the Baviaanspoort Hills in Gansbaai. This ancient forest has trees that date back over a 1000 years in age. This exclusive forest camp means ...
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!Khwa ttu
R27, West Coast Road, YZERFONTEIN, Cape West Coast, Western Cape, South Africa
This unique tented camp is set within an idyllic bush land setting. The camp has five comfortable-sized tents, which house 4 beds each. The open-air showers and sheltered toilets are tastefully designed to be in keeping with ...
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Captain's Cabin
Beach Road, YZERFONTEIN, 7351, Cape West Coast, Western Cape, South Africa
Captains Cabin can accommodate up to a maximum of 26 people in seven rooms. Four of the rooms contain double beds and en-suite bathrooms. The other three rooms are dorm-style rooms kitted out with bunk-beds and sleeping ...
More \ About Captain's Cabin
Hardeveld Lodge
Corner of Kambro and Kalossie Streets, NUWERUS, 8201, West Coast, Western Cape, South Africa
Ablutions with hot water shower, barbeque lapa, electricity. Wild flowers during season and guided tours to rare succulent sites and other areas of interest ...
More \ About Hardeveld Lodge
Sandveld Dorpshuys
14 Voortrekker Street, REDELINGHUYS, 8105, Cape West Coast, Western Cape, South Africa
Die Dorpshuys offers a range of accommodation options in Redelinghuys, between Picketburg and Velorenvlei. There are four bed and breakfast rooms, three self catering units and 25 camp sites. There are geese, pigs and ...
More \ About Sandveld Dorpshuys
West Coast Luxury Tents
Fork West Farm, between DWARSKERSBOS and Elands Bay, 7365, Cape West Coast, Western Cape, South Africa
Situated halfway between Dwarskersbos and Elands Bay, West Coast Luxury Tents is on a private beachfront farm that has no public access. The beach is accessible with a 4x4 vehicle and there is a private airstrip for light ...
AfriCamps at Doolhof Wine Estate
Bovlei Road, WELLINGTON, 7654, Cape Winelands, Western Cape, South Africa
AfriCamps at Doolhof Wine Estate offers boutique camping accommodation in a tranquil valley situated between the historic Bainskloof Pass and the Groenberg Mountain Range. The camp is set within the award ...
Buffalo Drift
Ruigtevlei Farm, Ruigtevlei Farm, GOUDA, 6821, Western Cape, South Africa
More glamping than camping, these tents contain a double bed (or bunk beds if youre into that); en-suite bathroom and a kitchenette. With access to your own private stretch of the riverbank you can cool off in the fresh ...
More \ About Buffalo Drift
AfriCamps Klein Karoo
Cango Caves Road, OUDTSHOORN, Karoo, Western Cape 6625, South Africa
AfriCamps tents provide an attractive accommodation option to those who like the freedom of the great outdoors but dont necessary want to rough it. With all the comfort of a permanent structure, proper furniture, bathroom, ...
More \ About AfriCamps Klein Karoo
El Yolo One
Farm Bo Haggas, Willowmore District, KLAARSTROOM, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
El Yolo One is a working Karoo guest farm situated at the foot of the Swartberg mountain range in the Great Karoo. Guests have a choice of self catering or bed & breakfast accommodation with a restaurant on site serving ...
More \ About El Yolo One
Gecko Rock Private Nature Reserve
Nougaspoort, 25km from TOUWS RIVER, Touwsrivier, 6875, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
Gecko Rock Private Nature Reserve offers comfortable accommodation in the Nougaspoort Valley, just 25 km from Touws River, and offers visitors an eco-adventure destination. Our aim at Gecko Rock is to offer our visitors an ...
Matjiesvlei Guest Farm
Matjiesvlei Farm, CALITZDORP, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
We offer you a peaceful, relaxing stay at our camping site, Die Dam Rivier Kamp (the Dam River Camp), situated on the shores of the Gamka River. This is an anglers paradise, with ...
More \ About Matjiesvlei Guest Farm
Meijer's Rust
1 Meijringspoort, DE RUST, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
The upper camp ground is located high in the Swartberg Mountains and is only accessible by 4WD. It has spectacular views over the Kamanassie and Outeniqua Mountains. It has potable water and ablutions with hot water. The ...
More \ About Meijer's Rust
Natures Rest Lapa
N12 Heimars River, OUDTSHOORN, 6629, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
The caravans sleep four guests in a double bed and two single beds. Sleeping bags, cushions and blankets are provided however guests need to bring their own towels ...
More \ About Natures Rest Lapa
Oppi Dam
R328, Schoemanshoek, OUDTSHOORN, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
Oppi Dam has eight luxury campsites, each with their own ablution area, sink, sitting area and braai facilities. There are plenty of electrical power points. There are also two campsites that share an ablution block. These ...
More \ About Oppi Dam
Rooiheuwel Holiday Farm
off the N1 from BEAUFORT WEST towards Cape Town, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
Camping sites are situated under doring bome. In this mountained topography you can refresh yourself with the many options and breakaway opportunities as a family after the humdrum of everyday in a relaxing and safe ...
The Travelling Tortoise Campsites
R341, DE RUST, 6650, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
This is the ideal place for a weary traveler to visit and wind down. Do as the tortoise does wind down slowly. The six camp sites are on level ground at the foot of the mountain. Each site accommodates four guests. It has ...
Wagon Wheel Country Lodge
1km North of BEAUFORT WEST, off the N1, BEAUFORT WEST, Western Cape, South Africa
Caravaners have their own communal bathrooms as well as a swimming pool and braai area. Children can enjoy the backpackers room instead of setting up tents for an overnight stay. The backpackers ...
Witteberg Private Nature Reserve
Farm Elandskloof, LAINGSBURG Municipal District, 6900, Karoo, Western Cape, South Africa
Witteberg Private Nature Reserve offers accommodation in fully furnished and equipped cottages and include bed-linen and bath towels. There is cutlery, crockery and most of the kitchen one ...
Mount Ceder Camping
Mount Ceder, Grootrivier Farm, CEDERBERG, Olifants River Valley, Western Cape, South Africa
Mount Ceder Camping offers three private self catering campsites, each with their own ablution facility that consists of a kitchen area, shower and toilet. No electricity. Gas and solar power only. Solar powered lights, gas ...
More \ About Mount Ceder Camping


text:
Nail Technology
Our Manicuring program covers all aspects of nail preparation & care in 400 hours of technical instruction & practical operations.
Total Hours: 400 hours
Timeline: 20-25 weeks
Cost: $3,343.58
Offered at our Reseda location.
We prepare students for a potential career as:
- Nail Technician
- Product Demonstrator
- Salon Owner/Manager
- Water and oil manicuring & pedicuring
- Application of acrylic, liquid & powder brush-on, nail wraps, nail repair, nail tips, gel nails without UV light
- Acrylic (methacrylate) encapsulated nails, UV-gels & nail art
- Advanced nail technology (electric filing, art stencils & stamps, freehand art & minx)
- Professionalism, job search strategy, personal and business ethics
- Personal grooming, employer-employee relations, customer relations, and communication skills
SCHEDULE #1 (4 months)
Monday 8:30am – 3:00pm
Tuesday 8:30am – 3:00pm
Wednesday 8:30am – 3:00pm
Thursday 8:30am – 3:00pm
Friday 8:30am – 3:00pm
SCHEDULE #2 (4 months)
Monday 6:00pm – 10:00pm
Tuesday 6:00pm – 10:00pm
Wednesday 6:00pm – 10:00pm
Thursday 6:00pm – 10:00pm
Saturday 8:30am – 5:00pm
Schedule may vary by location or demand.
Technical Minimum Specified
- Industry Laws & Regulations
- Health & Safety (training in chemical safety in establishments, material safety data sheets, protection from hazardous chemicals, preventing chemicals-related injuries, communicable diseases)
- Manicures & Pedicures (water and oil, hand/arm/foot/ankle massage)
- Manicurist Chemistry (training in chemical composition and the purpose of nail care preparation)
- Disinfection and Sanitation (procedures to protect the health and safety of the consumer as well as the technician; performing all necessary functions for disinfecting instruments and equipment as specified in Section 979 and 980; disinfection is emphasized throughout the entire training period and must be performed before use of all instruments and equipment)
- Bacteriology, Anatomy, and Physiology
- Additional Training (product knowledge, sales techniques, client suitability, professional ethics, client relations, effective communication)
Practical Minimum Specified
- Disinfection & Sanitation
- Manicures & Pedicures (water & oil manicures, complete pedicures, hand/arm/foot/ankle massage)
- Artificial Nails (acrylics, liquid, gels; powder brush-ons, nail tips, nail wraps, nail repair, nail analysis)
Fee's Break Down
- Tuition $2,600 (400 Hours)
- Equipment $350
- Books $238
- Registration Fee $100
- Tax $55.58
Total $ 3343
Tuition prices subject to change without notice.


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Happy New Year!! Welcome, 2016, and thank you 2015! I've been reflecting on weddings passed, and would like to tip my cap to my two favorites from last year or so. I see wedding photography as a sacred task. The couples I work with are putting some of their most cherished and significant memories in my hands, trusting me to capture those ineffable moments for them. I am honored to be that person.
Jessie & Joey
Jessie and Joey's engagement shoot at the old C&H Sugar factory proved to be a delightfully sweet introduction to the couple, and a perfect intimation of the enchanting celebration yet to come. Engagement sessions are awesome because they give me an opportunity to get to know the couple while they get a chance to become more comfortable in front of the camera before their big day. I must say that these fun-loving, warm hearted lovebirds were naturals though. Even a quick glance at the photographs of their elegant, rustic wedding at the stunningly verdant Nestldown venue clearly illustrates this. Beautiful both inside and out, it's no surprise that this couple's infectiously joyful nuptials stand out—definitely a favorite of mine.
To see more photos of Jessie and Joey's beautiful wedding and learn more about their love story, click the blog link below!
Nadine & Tim – Sneak Peek
My favorite wedding of 2015 was Nadine and Tim's enchantingly romantic and sophisticated celebration at Kennolyn Hilltop Hacienda, a charming Spanish style venue perched on top of the beauteous Santa Cruz Mountains. Married in front of a spectacular flower wall created by the bride's uber-talented florist mother, the wedding was truly chic—a breathtaking combination of lush greenery, stylish decor and a gorgeous bride radiating vintage glamour in her shimmering gown. Here's a sneak peek! Stay tuned for their forthcoming featured blog post.
Stay tuned for Nadine and Tim's forthcoming featured blog post! In the meantime, check out their captivating engagement shoot.
This Bay Area engagement session was a little dangerous—and tons of fun. It started on a Presidio/Marina street and progressed to the old Sutro Baths site and the beach nearby. It was such a blast!
*Click on the title or image below to see the full engagement shoot.


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"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home." Edward R. Murrow
I want to thank the hundreds of flyers who took me up on my offer for the DO NOT CONSENT TO SEARCHES stickers. There are now thousands of those stickers affixed to their new homes, plying the national air space or parked on ramps and in hangars across our United States of America.
Those stickers are nothing more than paper, ink, plastic, and a little glue. But it's the message printed on them, the resolution of those who placed them on their aircraft, which is significant. Sending stickers to those who asked, that was easy. Standing up to the intimidation to voluntarily give up a basic right guaranteed by the U.S. Constitution printed on those stickers, that's hard.
I live near a historical monument here in San Antonio, Texas, that represents the lengths to which people will go to stand up for what they know to be right. And while the site of The Alamo is where a larger and better armed force defeated a much smaller group of liberty-minded fighters, it serves as a personal reminder that freedom isn't free. The autonomy which we enjoy today could be taken from us…if we allow it.
So during this year's Independence Day, however you choose to celebrate it, remember that the only liberties we have are those we are willing to defend. The freedom to fly is worth defending.
Cheers from The Alamo.


text:
For some time, my colleague Tim Winship and I have been warning about future tightening of frequent-flyer programs. Specifically, we've noted that airlines would like to tie benefits more to what you pay for your ticket than how many miles you log. Delta seems to be spearheading the effort, and although no big competitor has followed yet, you can expect "me, too" responses fairly quickly.
Delta's latest move is to tighten qualifications for elite status. Now, in addition to just miles, you have to meet spending thresholds for coveted elite status: Starting in 2025, first-level silver status will require $2,500 in spending annually, along with the previous 25,000 miles or 30 segments of actual flying; gold will require $5,000 in spending/50,000 miles/60 segments; platinum will require $7,500 in spending/75,000 miles/100 segments; diamond will require $12,500 in spending/125,000 miles/140 segments. Delta will waive the dollar requirement if you charge $25,000 a year to a Delta credit card.
For very-frequent flyers, elite status has become the main benefit, not just the miles. Elite status on a giant airline brings some mix of "free" domestic upgrades, improved economy seating, preferred boarding, lower or no baggage fees, and such. The upgrades, in particular, are the holy grail, and the higher your status, the easier you get them.
Previously, Delta lowered the mileage-earning rate on a few little-used special low fares. You can expect more of that, too, but not a lot. Big airline frequent-flyer programs have become cash cows, as airlines sell billions of dollars worth of miles to credit card companies and others to give out to their customers. And carriers can easily cope with the huge numbers of miles by limiting award seats. I expect more tightening of elite programs going forward.
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text:
McClatchy Newspapers
May 1, 2009
A Washington state biosurveillance firm raised the first warning about a possible outbreak of swine flu in Mexico more than two weeks before the World Health Organization offered its initial alert about a public health emergency of international concern.
[efoods]Both federal and international health officials had access to the warning from Veratect Corp. Later e-mails calling attention to the company's subsequent report that the disease was possibly spreading in Mexico were sent to 10 officials of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said Robert Hart, the company's chief executive.
Hart said he wasn't sure why health officials didn't act sooner.
"They have a lot of other responsibilities," Hart said on Thursday. "But every day makes a difference."
CDC officials in Atlanta said they were aware of Veratect's claims and hadn't been working with the company.
"We have nothing to add about their claims," said CDC spokesman Llelwyn Grant, adding that the CDC and other public health agencies had plans in place to deal with a flu pandemic and responded rapidly once they became aware of the Mexican outbreak.
Veratect, based in Kirkland, Wash., uses a technique known as "data mining" to automatically search tens of thousands of Web sites daily for early signs of looming medical problems or civil unrest anywhere in the world. Anything of interest is turned over to a team of 35 analysts to determine its significance and to post on the company's Web site. The company markets access to its Web site to government agencies, businesses and others and has tried unsuccessfully to sell its service to the CDC, the World Health Organization and the Department of Homeland Security.


text: When is the best time to book a cruise in order to get the lowest fares 04/16/2016 When to book to get the best deals and how to get them. Some cruises never sell out, and because of this the cruise lines will have last minute drop and go promotions that are at a very reduced rate. These promotions are great for those that live in the same area that the cruise is going out of. They are usually geared for those that are retired or those that can take vacations at short notice. The downside is the cabins that are usually left are front of the ship or in NOT the most READ MORE


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How can I receive absolute instead of relative time data?
Checkmk's status displays show all time data less than 24 hours old as relative values - eg. "16 hrs". You can change these to absolute time data by using the display options opened with the button at the top left of every window.
How can I query a dashboard without taking the intermediate step via the login page?
Dashboards cannot be queried with the Automation-User. It is however possible for a regular user by using a specially-constructed URL.
You basically open the login page with valid access data, and following the login, allow yourself to be redirected to the dashboard.
If the dashboard's URL is as follows:
python -c 'import urllib ; print(urllib.quote("dashboard.py?name=my_custom_dashboard"))'
Then substitute your environment's appropriate values in place of the CAPITALISED placeholders in the following URL:
An example of a URL could look like this:
This by the way also functions for other URLs, for example, NagVis-Maps. Instead of the dashboard-URL simply use the NagVis-Map's URL.
|CheckMK Appliance
How can I clear the mail queue?
It might happen that there are several mails in the local queue on the appliance - mails which have been created due to a misconfiguration. In this case it might be useful to be able to clear the queue.
The mail queue can be deleted via the page _Manage email_ in the Web Configuration. On this page you can delete the emails one by one if you like.
Additionally, you can delete the emails using SSH. You need to enable root access via SSH and to connect to the device as root user. After login you can execute the _mailq_ command to take a look at the mail queue, and _rm /var/spool/nullmailer/queue/*_ to delete all mails from the queue.
Can the checkmk virt1 be used with Citrix Xen?
Yes. You can directly import the OVA file we provide into your Citrix Xen Host.
Can the checkmk virt1 be used with Microsoft Hyper-V?
It is possible, but not officially supported. However, it is possible to convert the OVA file we provide to a format which can be imported to your Hyper-V server.
Is it possible to access the appliance via SSH?
Yes, you can enable access of different users via SSH. You can find more details in the chapter Remote access via SSH.
Is a dedicated subscription needed for each device?
Not generally. For the subscription level the number of monitored services is relevant.
Where can I find the documentation for the appliance?
When you buy a device you will receive a printed manual with your device. The up-to-date documentation can also be found on our website in the User Manual, or can be downloaded as a PDF from the Appliance Downloads page.
Is the cluster active/passive or is it active/active?
A cluster of two devices is always an active/passive cluster. The active device is holding all of the resources, and the passive device is ready to take over the resources, if the active device fails.
Is it possible to create clusters of more than two devices?
No, the appliance cluster can only have two devices.
Is it possible to extend the RAM of the checkmk rack1?
The checkmk rack1 Mark I and checkmk rack1 Mark II have 4 DIMM sockets for DDR3 RAM. Both can handle up to 32GB ECC unbuffered DDR3-1600MHz RAM.
The checkmk rack4 Mark I has 16 DIMM sockets for DDR4 modules. The device can work with up to 1TB DDR4-2400 ECC RAM.
So technically it is possible to extend the RAM. You are allowed to exchange the built-in memory modules to extend the memory of the devices on your own.
Please ensure that you know what you are doing. We are not responsible for any damage done to the hardware.
Is it possible to configure the IP address via DHCP?
No, this is currently not possible.
Can the appliance support VLANs (IEEE 802.1q)?
As of firmware version 1.3.5 is is possible to configure VLANs using the advanced network configuration.
Is it possible to extend the HDDs of the checkmk rack?
The checkmk rack1 Mark I has two 2.5" front mount slots.
The checkmk rack1 Mark II has 4x 3.5" front mount slots. With the current firmware you can use the first two mount slots.
The checkmk rack4 Mark I has 4x 3.5" front mount slots. With the current firmware you can use the first two mount slots.
You can use custom HDDs/SSDs instead of the delivered ones. The drives are always configured as RAID-1.
Can the checkmk virt1 be used with KVM?
Yes. You basically need to download the OVA file we provide, unpack it and convert the shipped virtual HDDs from the VMDK format to, e.g., the QCOW2 format. You can then copy these virtual hard disk files to the paths where your VM images are stored. Finally, create a VM with the parameters of your choice and use the just converted QCOW2 disk images as harddisks.
You may want to take a look at the "virt1.ovf" file to see which parameters to use for the VM you create in the next steps. Some things are mandatory:
How precisely are the subscription's services counted?
The number of productive monitored services is relevant for the necessary subscription level. This number can be found at top left in the Checkmk interface's Tactical Overview. If it is the case that you operate Checkmk redundantly in an HA-cluster, the services will not be doubly counted. Pure test systems for trialling Checkmk versions, etc., are also not counted. If multiple Checkmk instances are in use, then the sum of the services over all of the instances in your business is the relevant number. Standalone or single HA-Cluster: In your monitoring site, under the host on which your site is running, you can find a service 'OMD MYSITE performance', which has a graph tracking the number of monitored hosts and services. Alternatively, you can search for 'OMD' in the quicksearch to find this service. If the agent on the Checkmk server is older than version 1.2.8. the history of the number of services has to be assumed from the "Check Performance" graph. Distributed Monitoring: The graph already mentioned is available for each site. You can add these graphs to a shared, custom graph to get the total number of services over all sites, and then summarize these. Here is an explanation how summarizing works: Calculating with formulae on custom graphs
Am I permitted to operate the Checkmk Enterprise Edition on multiple servers?
Yes. You are completely free as to the number of Checkmk instances used for configuring your monitoring. Only the total number of monitored services is used to determine the subscription size.
Does the number of hosts being monitored influence the subscription price?
No. The price is determined solely by the total number of monitored services.
How many services must I take into account if I have X hosts to monitor?
For a typical processing centre you can expect to have around 30-70 services per host. But naturally it makes a difference if you, eg. monitor a switch only with PING, or a data base server with 50 Oracle instances.
What limitations does the demo version of Checkmk have?
The demo version of the Checkmk Enterprise Edition is limited to two sites with a maximum of 10 hosts each from version 1.6.0 on. The demo version of the Checkmk Enterpise Edition/ Managed Services Edition for older versions (1.5.0 and lower) is completely identical with the Checkmk Enterprise Edition / Managed Services Edition - except for the fact that about 5% of the check results randomly get the "WARN" state. This means that you can try out all of the features of the Enterprise Edition - even in a distributed setup. It's just not possible to use the demo version in a production environment. The demo version can be updated to a full version later - while your configuration and data is kept. Please keep in mind, that these demo versions and the the Checkmk Raw Edition are completely different topics. Read more about this in the description of our editions or contact us.
Which services count towards the subscription price if I run a combination of CEE and CRE?
All services that are visible on a CEE-site are counted.
Example 1: - Site1 CEE 2000 services - Site 2 CRE 1500 services - Independent sites that do not communicate with each other. => The subscription will be calculated based on the 2000 services on site1.
Example 2: The same sites as in example 1, but additionally the services on Site1 are via Multisite visible on Site2 => The subscription will be calculated based on the 2000 services on site1.
Example 3: The same sites as in example 1, but additionally the services on Site2 are via Multisite visible on Site1 => The subscription will be calculated based on the 2000 services on site1, plus the 1500 services on Site2 – making a total 3500 services.
When do I need a subscription with the 'Managed Services' option?
When I monitor a physical system (hardware) whose functions are provided exclusively for another specific organisation (end customer).
Clarifications: * It is irrelevant whether the monitored systems used by the end customer are my property or the customer's. It is also irrelevant whether a system is located in my or in the customer's processing centre. * The monitoring of pure software services or virtual machines provided by the end customer does not require the MSP-Option. * The monitoring of hardware used by multiple end customers likewise does not require the MSP-Option.
When will my customer require their own Checkmk-Subscription?
When they use the Checkmk-System themselves. A Checkmk-system user is one who rectifies – or who initiates the rectification of – problems identified by Checkmk. Whether the Checkmk is installed on your server or on the end user's (customer's) server is irrelevant. Your end user will require their own subscription when you install, configure and maintain the system for them. Your customer will not require their own subscription when they only receive PDF reports from Checkmk or have access purely for information, but they themselves are not responsible for rectifying problems reported by Checkmk. Your customer may also manage scheduled downtimes and acknowledgments with Checkmk.
Can I receive professional support for the Checkmk Raw Edition?
No. If you desire professional support for Checkmk, then you will need to take out a subscription for the Checkmk Enterprise Edition. Within the support framework, we will of course also be happy to assist you with a migration from the Raw Edition or from another monitoring solution to the Enterprise Edition. Exchanges regarding the Raw Edition can be found in the free Checkmk mailing lists.
For how long are credits valid?
Credits are valid for 12 months from the purchase date, after which time they expire. However, before the expiry date, you can submit requests for tasks to us to the value of your remaining credits. In such a case the credits will not expire, even if the actual execution of the tasks will take longer.
At what times do the training courses start and finish?
All courses start at 10:00 a.m. on the the first day, and at 9:00 a.m. on subsequent days. Course days end at 5:00 p.m, except for the final day which ends at 4:00 p.m.
Do you provide meals during the trainings?
Yes, we provide a small breakfast and lunch for all trainings conducted in our Munich office.
We offer several mailing lists for Checkmk. Join them now to be updated at first hand.
Missing your question? Feel free to contact us directly.Contact us


text:
This section contains 1,193 words
(approx. 3 pages at 400 words per page)
Point of View
The novel is written in the third person. This point of view is reliable and omniscient. The narrator can relate both the events of the novel and the feelings of the characters. This point of view works well for the novel because numerous characters are followed at different stages of the book. Though Chen is the main character, there are times when he takes a subsidiary role and Yu, Peiqin, or Zhang becomes the main character of a particular chapter. The reader is allowed to see the thoughts, emotions and prejudices of the characters, creating a greater dramatic impact and empathy with a wider range of characters within the book.
The author uses a number of different techniques to tell the story. There are long passages of exposition and political and cultural context for the story interspersed with frequent, extended dialogue. Official reports and transcripts are...
This section contains 1,193 words
(approx. 3 pages at 400 words per page)


text:
First Dates (again)
Back for a sixth series, First Dates remains the most revealing natural history show on TV. I mean, who needs Attenborough explaining the mating rituals of flatworms (bottom line: not awfully sexy) when you can watch actual human singletons going about their courtly business over a confit of pork cheek?
This week's couples included Becky and Lewis. Becky was a burlesque performer, while Lewis introduced himself with the dread words 'wannabe funnyman'. The tone was set when he gallantly made the effort to suggest her day job as a property manager 'sounds quite impressive'. 'I do admin for the Institution of Mechanical Engineers,' he offered in return. 'See that is boring,' she replied. Ouch.
They hadn't even reached dessert before Becky was on her phone in the toilets, describing Lewis's shortcomings to a friend. In the post-prandial post-mortem, she told him: 'I just think I need someone a bit more… you know, manly.' Ouch. Again.
Italian designer Paulo fared even worse. True, he didn't exactly help himself by turning up in white jeans – you're not in Milan now, sonny – but you got the impression Ross Poldark could have ridden in with his shirt off and event planner Gemma would still have given him short shrift. After an hour of being torn to shreds during a series of awkward conversational cul-de-sacs, Paulo concluded: 'Doesn't go very well this date, no?' No, Paulo. It doesn't.
'The best thing about Paulo is he allowed me to make fun of him,' concluded Gemma. 'He probably thinks I'm a right cow.' Why, the very idea!
The best hope of romance seemed to be Uma and Ruth – who talked so intently, they failed to notice it was 11.20pm and the restaurant was closing – and Sonia and Ashley.
Despite looking like a tattooed kickboxing champion, Ashley was a scientist, able not only to compliment his date's green eyes, but point out they're 'a genetic mutation'.
A fast worker, Ashley was already contemplating marriage while they were still on their starter. 'We might travel back to Newcastle tonight and stop off in Gretna Green,' he declared, confidently – thus proving that a) romance isn't dead and b) his science is stronger than his geography.
TV extra:
Happy Valley
When Catherine Cawood declares it's been 'a s*** week', you know things are bad. This, after all, is a woman who started this series having to bash a sheep's brains in with a brick – and things went rapidly downhill from there.
While this second run may have stretched credibility (the Calder Valley's murder rate must be rivalling Midsomer by now), Sally Wainwright's drama – and Sarah Lancashire's performance – remain in a class all of their own.
I am worried Catherine's going to be sleeping in that conservatory for the rest of her life, though.
Inside Obama's White House
The opening instalment of this compelling four-part documentary focused on Barack Obama's first 100 days in 'power', when the best hope for genuine political change in a generation was swiftly derailed by the financial crisis, knocking the President's reform programme off course before he'd even taken the Oath of Office.
Watching the Yes We Can candidate run into the brick wall of Washington's rigid No You Can't culture was profoundly depressing and, for viewers staring down the barrel of a possible Trump presidency, not a little heartbreaking.
Published in Waitrose Weekend, March 17 2016
(c) Waitrose Weekend