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Pizza and Beer
The dynamic duo, the misfits of mayhem, the Lewis and Clark of Saturday afternoons. Pizza and beer are two entirely separate items that are entirely inseparable. They are also perhaps America's only redeeming factors.
A Brief History Of Pizza
Pizza was invented by a woman named Kearstin (her last name was never recorded. Kearstin was approximately 13 years old when she discovered how to create "pizza". Everyone was reluctant to try it at first but finally, Kearstin convinced her older brother to try it. Muhamid LOVED the taste of pizza and insisted on every on in town to try it. Eventually all the townfolk had a taste of this delicious food called "pizza" and Kearstin became a celebrity over night. Everyone was demanding this pizza and Kearstin charged Two-cents per slice (remember this was 1927). She eventually opened up a pizza stand and worked six hours a day. When Kearstin became old and gray, her grandson Chris P. Bacon, decided to open a restaurant that served ONLY pizza. And that my friend is how Pizza hut was created. So now every time you go to Pizza Hut, and bite into that slice of delicious pizza you can think of Kearstin. It's just a damn shame that Pizza Hut now serves pasta, cookies, deserts and hot wings now. She died in vain.
A Brief History Of Beer
Beer dates back to Biblical times, and Noah was the first recorded alcoholic. Beyond that nobody really cares where it came from because it's just so damn good. Beer is a scientifically proved prophylactic, and helps socializing by making everybody as dumb as each other. Christian monks were, at one point, so good at brewing beer that they built castles out of it, much like bees do with honey.
The art form of beer is now mostly degraded, and the level of brewing expertise in a nation is directly proportional to their proximity to Belgium (Feel free to assume that every Belgian person knows how to brew beer) - a nation so advanced in beerology that rumors have it they once brewed a beer out of nails and scorpions. (This is now sold in New Zealand under the moniker "Lion Red".)
Proper Pizza Etiquette
We know you probably like ordering yours with cum splattered under the cheese and baked, but before you order for others - make sure they're into that kind of pizza faggotry.
Good safe orders, if you're the loser gent that has no stash and has to get the munchies. Shouldn't make fun of that. That's a scholar and a gentelman who doesn't have dope of their own but brings food. America voted Bill Clinton into office based on that fact.
The safest pizza orders are always plain, extra cheese and pepperoni. If you're ordering pizza with pinapples and cilantro on it you better be in a bath house or expect to get an ass beating.
New York Style and Cleveland, a thicker crust version of New York, are tge only acceptable styles. Again, if you're ordering deep dish, don't be surprised that you're getting your ass kicked.
Always remember KISS Keep it simple stupid, not the shitty band. There's a reason plain, extra cheese and pepperoni are called the classics.
Pizza Royal 007
- Sunblush tomato sause
- Smoked salmon
- Venison medallions
- Cognac-marinated lobster
- Champagne-soaked caviar
- 24-karat gold
- Price: $2,800
Uses Of Pizza And Beer
- Eat.
- Drink.
- Detergent.
- Chick magnet.
- Unclogs your poophole.
As A Drama-Generating Technique
- Drink beer and then drunk dial/drunk post
- Post pictures of pizza in vegan communities
- Post pictures of pepperoni pizza in Jewish communities
- Make pizza oven related jokes in Jewish communities
- Make jokes about how pizza can feed a family of four in black communities
Advanced beer
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- Beeripedia
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- Bitches and whores
- Gimme Pizza
- EverQuest II
|Featured article June 15, 2006
|Preceded by
|Pizza and Beer
|Succeeded by


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Topic Page: Kermode, Frank, 1919-2010
Frank Kermode was an English literary critic. Born in 1919 on the Isle of Man, he taught at Reading, Newcastle, Manchester, Bristol, University College London and Cambridge, where he was King Edward VII Professor of English. Knighted in 1991, he died in 2010. While Kermode practiced a distinct form of literary criticism, philosophically and theoretically informed, it is hard to pin this down to a school or single set of ideas. On the one hand, Kermode was a crucial institutional influence in introducing "literary theory" to Britain and to the Anglophone world, through a now famous seminar series he ran in London and as editor of the Modern Masters series which introduced many key theoretical figures in accessible ways: on the other, he was critical of the "excesses" of much French theory. Again, while Kermode's work is critical of highly politicized readings of literature, it is not formalist or overly scholastic. Moreover, Kermode's criticism covers the whole span of English literature, from work on Beowulf and its translations, an early study of Wallace Stevens (whose poetry and thought remained a touchtone for Kermode) to books on and an edition of Shakespeare, to work on contemporary fiction.
However, perhaps what characterizes Kermode's work most of all, and makes it "theoretical" in the largest sense, is a sense of the difficulty involved in reading and understanding literature. Kermode's work does not evade the problems of hermeneutics, that is, the problems raised by the very nature of interpretation. Instead, it explores them not, usually, in the abstract - as some theorists do - but in relation to a very wide selection of literary and nonliterary works (with Robert Alter, for example, he helped pioneer approaching the Christian Bible as a literary text). Influenced by work in theological and philosophical studies of interpretation, Kermode suggests that our readings of texts are much more complex affairs than we usually allow. For example, he argues that in encountering a literary text, we are immediately distracted from literal interpretations by the "inherent proclivity of the mind for metaphor; the pressure exerted by context…; and the pressure of authoritative institutions of interpretation" (Alter 1992: 88). That is to say that our senses of metaphor and ways of finding similarities, which are often quite random in relation to the texts we read but are inextricably part of our interpretative process, influence how we understand texts. How we see "the relation of any given moment in a text to the texts that immediately and proximately surround it" (Alter 1992: 88) also shapes how we understand both that text and the larger text of which is it a part. And, finally, because interpreters "usually belong to an institution, such as a guild" (or, one might add, a university, newspaper, or website) they are led, sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously, into following received (and authoritative) interpretations of texts. These factors, which are implicit in any act of interpretation, shape how we come to understand literary texts.
Because of this, too, Kermode's work is concerned by the relationship between fictions (in the widest sense, including poetry) and reality. He argued that our understanding of the past, and of the world, are intertwined with the same forces that shape our interpretation of fictions. For Kermode, our making sense of reality is both shaped by and shapes our interpretations of fictions: yet our interpretation of fictions is itself a shaping force. He wrote: "World and book … are hopelessly plural, endlessly disappointing; we stand alone before them, aware of their arbitrariness and impenetrability, knowing that they may be narratives only because of our impudent intervention, and susceptible of interpretation only because of our hermetic tricks" (145).
Kermode's concern with interpretation coincided with his interest in literary value and the canon. While well aware of the nonliterary forces that make texts "canonical," Kermode was also clear that there is such a thing as literary value, even if it is impossible to define.
These ideas come together in perhaps his most famous book, The Sense of an Ending: Studies in the Theory of Fiction, which aims to outline a general theory of fictions, with a central interest in the issue of closure, the way in which fictions end. Beginning by examining fictions and beliefs about eschatology (the end of the world), he suggests that these are our own fears of death writ large, and that - just as we make up stories about the apocalypse - so we use fiction to make sense of our own lives and deaths. We need "fictive concords with origins and ends, such as give meaning to lives and to poems" (1966: 7). With this idea in mind, he goes on to distinguish between "chronos," the mere passing of time, and "kairos," moments of time that make up decision and are existentially significant. The book then turns to modernism, and argues that it represents a new version of fictionalized apocalyptic time.
Frank Kermode wrote that it is "not expected of critics as it is of poets that they should help us to make sense of our lives; they are bound only to the attempt the lesser feat of making sense of the ways in which we try to make sense of our lives" (1966: 3). Although this sounds typically self-abnegating - criticism as the handmaid of literature - on reflection, it can be seen another way: making sense of how we make sense is, after all, the task of reason.
Although Kermode founded no school or theoretical movement, his careful reading and judgment, and his role as a teacher, have been highly influential on a leading generation of British critics. His work is clearly an influence on Jacqueline Rose, and more recently this influence can be seen in critics like Mark Currie.
SEE ALSO: Narratology and Structuralism; Rose, Jacqueline
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subset: commoncrawl


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Sara Abera established, as a sole owner, the company Sara Garment Designers and Manufacturers (SGDM) in 1989, to design and supply high fashion, ladies dresses and accessories, to companies and individuals, as well as children's clothes. Currently, SGDM's clientele include: the cabin crew of Ethiopian Airlines and female staff of the Hilton Hotel. In the past, SGDM supplied uniforms to DHL, MIDROC Gold, Sheraton Addis, etc
Upon the establishment of SGDM, Sara came across the wonderful, traditionally hand-woven Ethiopian fabric called Tibeb; she was so fascinated by it that she set a target in her life, to present it to the rest of the world, as part of the rich cultural heritage of Ethiopia. The way to achieve that was through the establishment of a company that can produce this and other types of hand-woven fabrics, under controlled conditions thus, not only improving its quality but implementing designs and colour combinations that will be acceptable to clients, worldwide!!
Sara's dream materialised in March 2007, when she and a number of trusted friends/relatives, established Muya Ethiopia PLC (on a 6,000.00 sq. metres compound in the North of Addis Ababa) a company dealing with the production of handicrafts: mainly, traditionally hand-woven fabrics and various accessories, as well as pottery.
In 2007, Muya Ethiopia PLC, became a member of the International Fair Trade Association (IFAT)! Since its establishment, Muya Ethiopia PLC has participated in a number of trade fairs in New York / Atlanta - USA, Montreal / Toronto - Canada, Frankfurt - Germany and soon will present its products in Cape-Town - South Africa.
At home, Muya Ethiopia PLC is offering its expertise to UNESCO; it trained women prisoners the art of weaving at Wolliso Prison (120 km South of Addis Ababa) in 2007 and, currently at Debre Birhan Prison (110 km North of Addis Ababa).
In 2006, Muya Ethiopia was chosen to participate in the PACT (Program for building African Capacity for Trade)
Yeshi Taa, Chair Person
PO Box 613
Addis Ababa, Ethiopia
Tel: +251 (11) 1234015
Fax: +251 (11) 1234016
Mobile: (0911) 203580


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How to know if your child is gifted?
A child is talented in a field if he/she is enjoying the experience and doesn't require coaxing to do it. If parents are knowledgeable in the field, they can assess the skill level themselves. Or else, they can approach an expert for help.
What are the signs of giftedness in children? What are the defining characteristics of giftedness? Late-talking children and twice exceptional children are also discussed. read more
All children are talented, you need to help them to show their bright side
You, who 'll make them a star!
Sorry, not all children are talented. Only a select few children are gifted, the rest are average, even below average.
Technically, giftedness is usually defined as an IQ above 125 on a standard IQ measurement test. There are, of course, different ways of thinking about giftedness and children can be exceptionally gifted or talented in one area without having an overall high IQ. The reason for special education for gifted children was originally (in 1960s and 1970s) developed because the idea was that just as children on the low level of the IQ scale needed special types of education to make their maximum potential, kids on the high end of the scale also needed a different educational setting. The real concern initially was to help kids with exceptional ability who were failing in school. Of course, many programs for "gifted and talented" have ended up being filled with high achieving students who would probably do well in any educational setting. I'd also have to say that there are many gifted students who would do well in any educational setting too. I do think that many of the gifted children who really need special services don't get them.
If they are really good at something, they are gifted or intelligent. I love observing gifted children. They always amaze me.
I don't think you want to know. Each child born into this world is a unique blessing and gift. Each child will flourish with love, a safe environment and nurturing. They will become the best that they can be with continual support and care. Whether they are "gifted" or not according to some criteria developed in a study is irrelevant compared to the everyday performance in life. Doing their best, presenting a good example to others and being a supportive member of their place of being is more important that being labelled as gifted. You will know whether or not your child is performing well above their peers by just observing their situation. They may be gifted in one area and not in another. Teach them to respect themselves, their world and others around them and love learning. Teach them to enjoy their bright mind and honor their special talents in whatever area they excel in. Respect their gift of excelling in an area and let them lead their way. I really find that labeling a child as gifted in an area can be detrimental to overall development of the whole child. Help them to be balanced, caring and aware of the needs of others. If they are truly gifted, their innate qualities will flourish regardless of any labellings. Nurture them, encourage them and love them. Let them experience as much as possible and guide them to be caring citizens of our world. If they have a God given gift, it will flourish as they unfold in their development. You will know by their performance.
and have tolerance for those who do not achieve the same as they do in the area of growth that shows proficient
development. Make each day a gift and do not worry about labels.
Gifted children ask a lot of questions - they are curious about how things work, and the why's and wherefore's of the world. They are often individualists, even thought by their peers to be weirdos. They are often quiet and thoughtful, and often have unusually good vocabularies, and seem to reason things out better than some of their less-endowed friends of the same age. That's my impression of the gifted children I know.
One or two people answering this question have said that it doesn't matter whether children are gifted, etc. etc., but, whilst that might be the case, it wasn't what was asked,as the question was. "how do you know?" and not "does it matter".
I always tell clever children that they are fortunate enough to have a special gift of intelligence above the average, and that they should use their gift for the benefit of mankind.
by Grace Marguerite Williams 6 months ago
What are THE TEN things that gifted children DO that average children DON'T or CAN'T? How are gifted children more mature than average children of corresponding ages? Why gifted children will reach higher success levels as adults than average children will ever reach?
by arizonataylor 2 months ago
Should highly gifted children skip grades?Academically, I see the value. I wonder about the social aspect of skipping a grade.
by Susan Reid 7 years ago
Would you write something about gifted and talented children please?
by Grace Marguerite Williams 6 months ago
There are children who are so aware at their young ages. They have a perception that some adults do not have. These children are often quite prodigious. They are usually the A students, even though they may not be A students, they have an intellectual curiosity...
by Eileen 8 years ago
Do you think gifted children are born 'gifted' or just given opportunities?These days we hear of many child prodigies but I was wondering are they really born intelligent or are they just more exposed to better toys, computers...etc?
by HeatherH104 6 years ago
Does anyone have a child with a GIEP? If so, how did you get it and is your child being challenged?
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