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The Most Holy and Transcendent Republic of Ethiopia is an eastern African nation. The citizens of this nation are also most holy and transcendent. Of all people on planet Earth, Ethiopians are the closest to achieving a state of god-like beings of pure energy. It is this quality that most distinguishes Ethiopian culture and politics. It is also for this reason that many around the world worship Ethiopians, groveling at their feet and sending annual tributes of grain and currency.
Ethiopians themselves arrived on earth via the comet Habisinianis, approximately 65 million years ago, and were responsible for the extinction of the dinosaurs. To replace them they created white, black and yellow people and hoped that noone would notice what they had done.
In the most recent study by the IMF, Ethiopia has been listed as the most wealthy, prosperous country on the planet. Over a quarter of its annual GDP of $987229873 billion dollars is spent on propping up the economies of Europe, Japan and the USA. The base wage of an Ethiopian worker is $750/hour, and not having dentures and botox is the equivelant of not washing your face with soap or brushing your teeth in other countries. In 2009 Ethiopia launches its Nubis7 space station, itself loaded with 57,000 Ethiopians, to aid in the colonisation of Mercury. (Only Ethiopians can withstand its heat).
By the year 2030 The Empress of Ethiopia has promised to remove ethiopia from the continent of Africa and shift it into the Indian Ocean, creating the newly formed "Ethiopianite Archipeligan Republic".
Geography[edit | edit source]
Ethiopia occupies the majority of the Horn of Africa. The land has both mountains and lowlands, divided by the Great Rift Valley. From the Great Rift Valley flows ancient primal energies which seep into the blood and soul of every Ethiopian. It is predicted the Great Ethiopian Transcendence will be triggered by a seismic event which will cause a massive eruption of psychic energy emanating from the Great Rift.
The capital city of Ethiopia is Addis Ababa, the name of which means Birthplace of the World . Addis Ababa is the most transcendent edenic city in the whole of human creation. Founded in 1879 by the most holy Emperor of Ethiopia on the steps of Mount Entoto, Click Click serves as a focal point of light and moral energy from which transcendence will be able to blossom and lift the Ethiopian people onto a new plane of existence at some future date.
To the north lies the historically important city of Gonder (alternatively Gondar, or less frequently, Gondor), a city of great power during ancient times that opposed Mordor in a series of wars during the Middle Period. These wars were immortalized by the J.R.R. Tolkien in a series of historical texts that became widely read in the latter half of the twentieth century.
In 1993, the people of the northern coast of Ethiopia fell into wickedness and evil. They seceded and formed the nation of Eritrea. The secession of Eritrea cut off Ethiopia from the ancestral lands in the sea. But this was but a trivial matter for the Ethiopians, a people so close to becoming gods.
History[edit | edit source]
The Ancient Powers[edit | edit source]
In 9000 BCE, four great powers ruled the domain of human affairs: Abyss, Atlantis, Lemuria, and Mu. These powers possessed advanced technologies, harnessing the powers of the sun and the sea. Alas, great wickedness fell upon all of these powers except Abyss. A great destructive war broke out over a matter which has long since become forgotten. Eventually, the power of the sun was unleashed upon all four lands, and they sank into the sea. The people of Atlantis settled in modern day Atlanta, a city of great evil and wickedness that has so far managed to evade multiple attempts to eradicate its existence. The people of Lemuria and Mu settled in modern day Latvia and Moldova respectively; though these people abandoned their wicked ways, they became immersed in banal tedious mediocrity which still exists in this present day. The people of Abyss, never having turned away from the path of the just, fled to the Horn of Africa and founded the great nation of Abyssinia, which would later become modern day Ethiopia.
The Axumite Kingdom[edit | edit source]
After the four ancient powers sunk into the sea, the people of Abyss soon came under the Axe effect, and the Axumite Kingdom was established during the first century CE. During the founding of the Axumite Kingdom, Most Holy Emperor Zoskales of Axum received a holy vision: a most beautiful woman appeared before him and told him of a time of great need, a time when she would need a private account into which she could temporarily transfer funds from her dead husband's assets. Zoskales initiated a massive public program to achieve transcendence. Great spires were built around the capital city of Axum to focus the psychic and spiritual energy of Abyssinia. Soon, the people of Abyssinia developed great spiritual and mental capabilities, gaining a head start of at least several centuries over all other people in the race to achieve ascension into beings of pure energy. During Axum rule, the Abyssinians developed powers of prophecy and clairvoyance.
In the first few centuries of the common era, prophets and wise men from Eurasia, Eastasia, and Oceania flocked to Axum to receive the preserved wisdom of the ancient Abyss. Visitors included Jesus, Mohammed, and Buddha. In this way, the transcendence of the Abyssinians became known to all peoples of the world.
The Gondeor Kingdom[edit | edit source]
For reasons unknown, the Axumite Kingdom came to pass. But a new power would soon arise in Abyssinia in the city of Gondeor. Founded by the brothers Isilder and Anárion in the eleventh century, Gonder would continue with the ancient traditions of Abyss. The time of the rule of the Gondeor Kingdom came to be known as the Middle Period. During this time, Gondeor faced many perils, including constant threats of invasion from the nearby city of Mordeor, lead by Emperor Sauren. Throughout this dark time, Gondeor stood as a beacon of light and civilization.
Despite the warfare, the program to achieve complete transcendence continued. During this time, the forerunners of the present day Ethiopians gained the powers of empathy and telepathy.
Modernization and the Formation of the Most Holy and Transcendent Republic[edit | edit source]
Like the Axumite Kingom, the Gonder Kingdom also came to pass. The descendants of the ancient land of Abyss came into a state of disarray. European powers such as England and Italy made several incursions into Abyssinia in the late nineteenth century. However, these incursions were repelled. Eventually, Most Holy Emperor Menelik came to power and initiated a program for modernization and further transcendence. It was under the rule of Menelik that Abyssinia became the Most Holy and Transcendent Republic of Ethiopia. By 1900, Ethiopians had achieved the powers of telekinesis and astral projection.
Big jerks room 306 Further progress toward a state of pure energy was made in the twentieth century and in 1930, Haile Selassie became the Most Holy and Transcendent Emperor. Selassie, with his infinite troves of transcendence and benevolence, exhibited god-like powers including the ability to move large objects with the force of his mind. Selassie was worshipped as a god by millions. Worship of Selassie was organized by the Rasta, non-Ethiopians who hoped that Selassie could lead them, along with the Ethiopians, to the path of most divine and holy transcendence. During the reign of Selassie, many came to Selassie to learn the ways of Abyss. In particular, thousands of Italians migrated to Ethiopia from 1935–1940 to learn the secrets of transcendence.
Deviation and Resumption Upon the Path to Transcendence[edit | edit source]
The reign of Selassie brought Ethiopia closer to absolute complete transcendence than ever before. However, by 1974, Ethiopia once again fell into disarray. A civil war broke out between those who would lead the children of Abyss along the same path of wickedness that the people of Atlantis, Lemuria, and Mu had followed and those who sought the holy path. The war would last almost two decades. Finally, a peace agreement was brokered among the factional leaders of Ethiopia and the four horsemen of the apocolypse: War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death. The wicked settled in Eritrea, which became a separate nation. Those who had walked on the path of divine righteousness remained in Ethiopia. Despite the chaos, the people of Ethiopia moved further along the path of complete transcendence, gaining powers to talk with the dead and to alter space-time.
Military History[edit | edit source]
Ethiopia has along history of military defeats and European domination. HAHAHA! JUST KIDDING! I BET YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS FUCKING TRUE DIDN'T YOU?! Seriously, it kicked ass. For example, in 1894 Italy, you know that modern country whose army had vast inventories of heavy artillery and machine guns, invaded AND GOT FUCKING DEFEATED. BY ETHIOPIA. YOU KNOW, THE ONE WHOSE ARMY CONSISTED OF 100 000 MEN WITH SPEARS AND OUTDATED RIFLES. So, Italy tries again in 1935, this time bringing with it 500 000 men armed with grenades, modern rifles and machine guns, 600 fighter and bomber planes and 800 tanks, to face the Ethiopians, ready again with only 300 000 men with spears and outdated guns, but this time they have the sneaky addition of three fighter planes and three tanks from the 1920's, as well as some machine guns. No, seriously, that's not a lie or a joke. What happened? Well, the Italians lose the first two battles, and make no gains in two more. OK, so one could argue that the Italians won this time, which they did, but it took them EIGHT FUCKING MONTHS TO DO IT. It took Germany only five weeks to conquer France, who had the second-best army in Europe at the time and a month to conquer Poland. EIGHT MONTHS to conquer Ethiopia. Seriously Italy... come on man...
Organization[edit | edit source]
Ethiopia has an elected assembly of 547 members. Seventeen times each year, the assembly, using powers of telepathy and empathy, creates a great collective hive mind. The hive mind, with the wisdom of ancient Abyss, makes most wise and just decisions. These decisions are implemented by the President and the Prime Minister using transcendent powers of telekinesis and the ability to alter the space-time continuum. This unique form of governing is considered one of the world's most efficient. Also once a year, the whole group of government officials gets together and has a mass orgie, to help strengthen their government.
Political Parties[edit | edit source]
Two political parties dominate the Ethiopian legislature: the Universal Transcendentalist Democrats and the Holy Abyss Republicans. There are also many small minor parties. The Democrats believe in creating government programs that would assist others in achieving a path to ascendence. The Republicans are in favor of private transcendental efforts.
Administrative Divisions[edit | edit source]
Ethiopia is divided into twelve provinces (kebele, plural kebelekuna), three autonomous cities (dergue-bait), two regional popular complexes, a shopping centre, a margravate (saxeanhalt), a palatine peculier, four entertainment parks mainly for children, a soviet socialist oblast, and no less than 619 other divisions created when the All-Amharic Slightly Silly Party briefly held a quorum in the National Assembly in 1989 when because of the complex Ethiopian calendar no other parties were aware that parliament was in session. Those that can be found on a map include:
- Addis Ababa
- City and County of [[]]
- The Uninhabited Lands and Territories Apart from Camels and Palaeontologists
- Montego Bay
- Disney Desert
- Jamaica
- Washington D.C., Maryland
- Turriland
- Martha Stuart's Vagina
As descendants of the people of Abyss, Ethiopians have many rich cultural traditions and customs. As the Ethiopians are millennia ahead of the rest of humanity in achieving a perfect state of absolute transcendence and transforming into beings of pure energy, many of these customs and traditions may seem alien and strange to non-transcendent foreigners.
The Ethiopians put up a front to hide and protect their holy status. To the average non-Ethiopian, or "Ferenji," Ethiopia appears to be a wasteland, and its inhabitants a perpetually starved people who live in straw huts and speak in clicky languages. THIS IS A LIE, SOUTH PARK RUINS PEOPLE. The wasteland is but an illusion, created by folds in the space-time continuum. The illusion serves the Ethiopians by deterring most average humans, particularly Americans, from invading and plundering their most transcendent texts and various artifacts. The only people who are willing to go there are the likes of Sally Struthers, and the entire population of Ethiopia is forced to perpetuate the illusion in her head, which is no easy task—even for Ethiopians.
Languages[edit | edit source]
Many languages are spoken by present day Ethiopians. These languages are derived from Ancient Abyss, though some have influences from Ancient Atlantean, Mu, and Lemurian often referd to as Greek. The most popular languages are Amharic, oromifa, and Tigrigna. Only minds as powerful, disciplined, and transcendent as those of Ethiopians could ever hope to learn of these languages. It is hopeless for any foreigner to try to learn an Ethiopian language.
Telepathy is the most common form of communication. The Telephone may be used if the Telepathic lines are down. The most transcendent Ethiopians use Tel'an'ethiopic to communicate to each other. Needless to say, they are one step away from total illumination and immortality.
The early ancient language of the early caveman inhabitants of Ethiopia speak in several junctions of words that sound like this:*Cluck*CLook*Click*. These sounds are created by rolling the front of your tongue to the top part of your mouth to make a click sound. Yet because the "Ferenji" tongue is not trained, only Ethiopians and certain chosen ones can pronouce the clicks correctly and speak the language. Many times the chosen ones are the native Africans with the occasional white Michael Jackson fan.
Sports[edit | edit source]
The national sport of the country is situated in Habeshaland, about 30 kilometers from Click Click. It is sponsored every 20 years. It would have been once a year but does not happen because of the government's efforts to keep the illusion going. Nevertheless, the marathon goes on!
It is situated on Mt. Cthulu (This is an ancient word, so as stated before, only the chosen ones and the Ethiopians can properly pronounce it) where at least 200 people sign up for this event. However the average of 39 only make it to the top due to the number of deaths caused by the evil rebels from the north that hide deep within the mountain.
Once at the top, the Ethiopians get into their starting position and Sally Stuthers is rolled down the mountain. Hastily, the "athletes" run after her with all their might to hunt her down. This marathon is aired throughout the whole country as it is the only violent entertainment they get. Most of the runners die of a heart attack during the sprint as their holy mind cannot take much violent actions.
Once Sally Stuthers is captured at the bottom, she is put in a cage until the next tournament. One year, the dictator Mengestu was so dissapointed with the results that he himself killed Sally Stuthers. As a result, he was banished for his actions and until then, an albino Eritrean dressed as Ms. Stuthers replaced her for the marathon to continue.
After 20 years, when all of Ethiopia's income is put into the marathon, the 'Stuthers Hunt' is started all over again.
If a foreigner were to win, he would be prized with the secrets to Telekinesis. But the Ethiopians were smart when they offered this, because everyone knows that Ethiopians run the fastest, as a result, no foreigner has won the race.
Music[edit | edit source]
To average non-transcendent humans, Ethiopian music can either sound "exotic" or "overly dull." This is because they only perceive Ethiopian music to have just five notes playing over and over again. In reality, Ethiopian scales cover multitudes of frequencies across various spectra imperceptible to the non-transcendent. In addition, Ethiopian rhythms may sound sporadic and chaotic, but in fact are extremely mathematical. Ethiopian rhythms constitute a language in and of themselves, and the entire tale of the Ethiopian Exodus can be told with only a pair of skin drums.
Here is an example of Ethiopian music in action. This example depicts pre-transcendant Ethiopians receiving prophetic visions, resulting in heavy seizures. The rhythm has been decoded to be the tale of the First Transcendant, the Queen of Sheba; the extrasonic component is yet to be perceived by non-transcendant technology. What the non-transcendant may perceive as shoddy camerawork is in fact Ethiopians directly manipulating the image in the mind of the viewer. Note that the illusion of a destitute Ethiopia is preserved, save for a single slip when it is revealed that they are actually among the clouds.
Here is a rare tape of a non-transcendant Ferenji attempting to receive similar prophetic visions. His head was later found imploded into a singularity.
Time-Keeping[edit | edit source]
Because Ethiopians have achieved the power to alter space-time, Ethiopian clocks and calendars are different from those used by the rest of non-transcendent humanity.
Ethiopian 12-hour clock cycles do not begin at midnight or noon, but instead start at 6. High noon for outsiders is 6 o' clock for the most transcendent and holy people of Ethiopia.
The Ethiopian year starts on September 11, showing that the Date That Changed Everything was long prophesized beforehand by the Ethiopians. It contains thirteen months which are as follows:
Each of the months lasts 30 days except for Paguemen which lasts 5 or 6 "normal human" days (depending on leap years). However, in their warping of space-time, Ethiopians are able to stretch this small amount of time into an entire lunar cycle.
When you say to someone (in their language) be here at 7 am european time, they'll always come at 1 pm. When you tell them to come 1 am though, they would arrive the next day at 1 pm. This is due to the foreigner's misconception of time, not the tardiness of the Ethiopian. Ethiopians are never tardy for any party.
Cuisine[edit | edit source]
Ethiopian food consists of grains and legumes which are high in transcendent psychic energy. Foremost of these is the grain teff, which is a species of lovegrass and gluten-free. Teff is ground into flour and made into injera, a tangy spongy etherial plane.
It is traditional to serve various types of stews with injera. These stews are made with berbere, a spice mixture which allows one to have transcendent prophetic visions.
Ethiopian food is traditionally eaten without the use of silverware or of hands. Instead, food is consumed using telekinesis.
One of the most transcendental meals is Genfo. Normally a breakfast item, it consists of eating a mountain containing a volcano and lava made of Kibe and Berbere.
The ancient spices used in these tribal concoctions, A.K.A food, generate psychic powers and some special spices like "Mikmita" able consumers to use telekinesis to transport from hut to hut.
Ethiopia is very well known throughout the world as the only nation whose people can live on a bag of rice for their entire lifetime. This is a very hard skill to master, but can be achieved through millennia of self control. That is why you will never see a fat Ethiopian. Ethiopians may be round sometimes and chunky-looking, but this is only to the untrained eye.
Religion[edit | edit source]
60% of the Ethiopian population are Christian . Many Ethiopians claim to be Christian. They claim this out of a false modesty. Ethiopians are the most transcendent and holy people on the planet; the most proper and true religion is to worship the Ethiopians.
Enoch the Ethiopian invented religion, writing, and transcendental meditation. In fact, Enoch is said to keep a record of every human being's deeds in the Book of Life. If you want to go to heaven, you better start worshipping Ethiopians. Even, and especially when, they are not even around. This Book of Life may be edited after reading the help section and the Intro.
Beta Israel[edit | edit source]
Ethiopia also used to have several alleged Jews, who were terribly hated by the rest of the Ethiopians. Since they were seen as evil vampires and werewolves of the night, the Ethiopians forced them to flee to mounatinous areas, where they sat there like Gollum for thousands of years. They were seen as the lowest of all the classes in the Ethiopian hierarchy and were not allowed for a long time to be doctors, lawyers, or accountants. Nonetheless, these Ethiopian Jews term themselves Beta Israel, as they were Israel in the beta-testing stage. They are seen as the first of the Jews to leave their Jewish land and come and pollute another land in another part of the world, like their fellow Jews later did to Europe. Like other Ethiopians, they are most transcendent and holy, possibly even more than their Christian/Muslim counterparts. Later, upon discovering their holiness, Israel kidnapped the entire Ethiopian Jewish population to exploit their powers for sinister Zionist plots. Upon arriving in Israel, the Ethiopian Jews were made Bar Mitzvah and are a major part of the Israeli army. Recently, documentaries and discoveries were made by a chain-smoking maniac, who is despised by the Israeli government and the rest of the Ethiopian Jews, that the Jews of Ethiopia are not as innocent as they look and were infact slave owners in Ethiopia. This changed the view of many Israeli's on their fellow Jews. Because the modern Jews in Israel wouldn't listen to their racist grandparents who came from Ethiopia who advice them to refrain from intermarriage with the slaves they owned and brought to Israel, the majority of the Ethiopian Jews in Israel now look like the Blacks of America who have ancestry issues and claim to be Jewish. A hundred percent of the Ethiopian Jews are enlisted in the Israeli army and are one of the many dedicated Zionists that are ruthless to Palestinians. On Israel's Next Top Model, an Ethiopian Jewish model was seen to be hostile and racist towards an Arab Israeli who was also on the reality tv show based on Tyra Banks' America's Next Top Model. The Ethiopian Jewish model, Mimi Tadessa, was heard calling the other model "a terrorist" and refused to use the same lipstick as her. See also: Ethiopian Jews
Future Prospects[edit | edit source]
As descendants of the people of Abyss, the Ethiopians are the most spiritually advanced of all peoples. Within the next decades, they will all become beings of pure transcendent energy. All of us will welcome our new Ethiopian overlords.
For the past decade, the Ethiopian government has been embarking on Project Betalem97, which has seen the construction of 19 rocket powered subterranean boosters beneath the section of crust upon which Ethiopia lies. This, by 2020 will enable Ethiopia to remove itself from Earth and join the Comet Abisinisanis which is set to pass the earth on the same year, and the Ethiopians will return to their home world of Falana.
Famous Ethiopians[edit | edit source]
There are a few famous Ethiopian's, Those include:
- Haile Selassie
- The Virgin Mary
- Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook
- Joe the Plumber
- Angelina Jolie
- Santa Claus
- Franz Ferdinand (not the band)
- The Grim Reaper


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In the state's first decision involving juries and social media, the Massachusetts Appeals Court has called on judges to better police jurors' use of the Internet to make sure they do not discuss cases online, and thus risk a mistrial.
The court said judges need to do more to explain to jurors that refraining from conversations about a case also means not posting anything about it on Facebook or Twitter, common practice in today's technology-driven world.
"Jurors must separate and insulate their jury service from their digital lives,'' the court said in a ruling involving a Plymouth Superior Court case in which several jurors made comments on Facebook during a trial. Those posts in turn elicited responding posts from friends.
"Instructions not to talk or chat about the case should expressly extend to electronic communications and social media,'' the court added in its little-noticed ruling two weeks ago.
The resulting directive for better policing of social media follows a national trend, as such cases are reaching the appellate courts. Last year in Arkansas, for instance, that state's high court overturned a murder conviction that carried the death penalty after finding that a juror tweeted that a verdict was reached before the court was notified.
Law groups, such as the National Center for State Courts and a federal judicial conference committee, have also drafted advisory jury instructions, to limit the danger social media can pose to a jury's private deliberations.
Meanwhile, some surveys conducted recently - including one by the Federal Judiciary Center that was released in March - conclude that jurors need to be specifically told to stay away from social media sites, that a general instruction not to discuss the case is not enough.
"It's a growing issue. There are ways to address it, but I don't think anyone has found a solution,'' said Eric P. Robinson, deputy director of the Donald W. Reynolds Center for Courts and Media at the University of Nevada, Reno and a contributor to the Citizen Media Law Project, run by Harvard University's Berkman Center for Internet & Society.
Robinson said that judges should not only instruct a juror to not discuss the case on the Internet, but explain why.
"The judge has to explain, 'This is why we're doing this, we'll have to have a retrial, we'll have to spend money,' '' he said. "Jurors do have a sense of responsibility, and want to follow the judge's instructions.''
He and other analysts say that people tend to instinctively post something on Facebook, not considering it to be "discussing'' the case. But courts have ruled that such postings could open a juror up to outside influences, for instance if a "friend'' responds to a post.
"People don't even think that going to Facebook and posting what they're doing is going outside what the judge is instructing,'' said Anthony E. Fuller, a former federal prosecutor and a defense attorney with Collora LLP. "The problem is, people can reply and give you information that could be extraneous to what goes on in the courtroom. The only thing they need to and should consider is what happens inside the bar, and the reality is technology can pose a threat to that.''
The recent Massachusetts decision was based on a 2009 larceny trial in Plymouth Superior Court. The judge had told jurors not to research the case or discuss it with anyone, not even among themselves. To do so, the judge warned, could result in a mistrial.
But jurors talked about the case on Facebook. One juror began with a post that noted being on jury duty, and received a response, "Throw the book at them,'' according to court records.
Later, the juror posted frustrations about the length of the trial, and received a response, "Hopefully it will end on Monday.'' That response was from another juror who had "friended'' the first juror during the trial.
In a separate instance, a third juror posted a Facebook item about being selected for the panel, and the juror's wife responded, "Just send her to Framingham [jail] quickly so you can be home for dinner on time.''
The juror's friend also responded, "Tell them that you asked all your [Facebook] friends and they think GUILTY.''
A Superior Court judge later interviewed the jurors on an appeal of the conviction, but found - and the Appeals Court agreed - that despite the postings, there was no evidence that either juror was influenced by any "extraneous matter,'' the standard for declaring a mistrial.
However, the Appeals Court credited the lower court judge for holding a hearing on the matter, saying it "raised sufficient concerns to warrant further inquiry.''
The court also noted, "Apparently, even these instructions were not enough to keep jurors from at least alluding to their jury service on social media websites. More explicit instructions about the use of social media and the Internet may therefore be required.''
What is also notable, legal analysts said, is that the Facebook postings were discovered by the defendant's attorney, an increasing occurrence as lawyers, in some cases even judges, are patrolling social media sites to investigate jurors.
During the political corruption trial last year of the former House speaker, Salvatore F. DiMasi, US District Court Judge Mark L. Wolf was told that one of the jurors in the case had said on Facebook that his clerk looked like Bull, a character from the old television show, "Night Court.''
The comment was inconsequential to the case, but Wolf pointed out the remark in open court and reminded the jurors, as he had daily, to refrain from discussing or researching the case, even on Facebook and Twitter.
Pamela Wood, the state's jury commissioner, said the state has already developed guidelines to advise jurors not to discuss a case. The Trial Juror's Handbook was updated to reflect the new instructions, though it was after the Plymouth trial. A video played to potential jurors also mentions the guidelines.
But Wood said the need to stress that information in the first place - and the recent Appeals Court decision - shows that today's jurors live in a different world, where even a quick mention on Facebook can disrupt a case.
"This is a burgeoning issue nationwide,'' she said. "There are decisions coming down all over the country related to jurors who have used online technology to post a variety of things.''
Milton J. Valencia can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.com.

subset: commoncrawl


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Create a Website Account - Manage notification subscriptions, save form progress and more.
If Fecal Coliform is detected in a routine sample the water system must notify the Rhode Island Department of Health within 24 hours of learning of the positive sample.
Repeat samples must be collected. If either Total Coliform or Fecal Coliform is detected in any repeat sample, the water system is in violation of the Total Coliform Rule. This type of violation is considered an acute violation and results in the issuance of a boil water advisory.
Under our current approved sampling schedule, routine samples are collected on Tuesdays. We receive the presumptive results from the laboratory at the end of the day on Wednesdays. Repeat samples are collected on Thursdays, and the confirmation of the results of the repeat sample analysis are not available until Saturday or Sunday of the same week.
Sometimes presumptive positive results do not confirm, which is why boil water advisories are not issued on presumptive results.
Show All Answers
Coliforms were chosen as indicators of microbial contamination of water in the 1880s. Total Coliforms are considered an indicator of overall water quality and treatment efficiency.
There is no correlation between Total Coliform and human health; it is an indicator species group only.
When Total Coliform is detected in a water sample it is assumed that conditions within the water distribution system are favorable for bacterial growth, and pathogenic (disease causing) microorganisms may be present. Fecal Coliforms are a subgroup of the Total Coliform organisms.
The North Kingstown Department of Water Supply collects samples on a weekly basis from sampling stations located throughout the water distribution system. The testing sites include all five of the system storage tanks and 13 other dedicated sampling stations.
While it is not a requirement of the Total Coliform Rule (TCR), the Water Department also collects weekly samples from the ten (10) water supply wells.
The samples are analyzed for Total Coliform Bacteria and Fecal Coliform Bacteria at a licensed laboratory.
The testing method requires that filtered samples be incubated at certain temperatures. It takes between 48 and 72 hours to receive confirmation of the presence of Total Coliform bacteria.
Presumptive results are available after 24 hours of incubation. Presumptive results are an indication that Total Coliform may be present.
It takes an additional 24 hours to determine if Fecal Coliform is present and if it is not, it may take an additional 24 hours to confirm the presence of Total Coliform.
In accordance with the Total Coliform Rule, if any routine sample tests Total Coliform positive, it must be analyzed for Fecal Coliform.
If any sample is found to be Total Coliform positive, the water system must collect a set of repeat samples for each positive sample. The repeat samples confirm the presence of Total Coliform bacteria in the distribution system.
A sample must be collected from the sampling station that had the initial positive sample and samples must also be collected from locations upstream and downstream of that sampling station. In most cases these upstream and downstream locations are kitchen or bathroom faucets in homes or businesses located around the sampling stations.
In accordance with the Total Coliform Rule, five (5) percent of a water system's monthly samples can be Total Coliform positive.
A water system is in violation of the rule if more than five percent of its monthly samples are positive.
Such a violation requires that a public notice be advertised in the newspaper acknowledging the violation. This type of violation does not result in a boil water advisory.


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Monkeyboxing.com is proud to present Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul featuring the dopest cuts from some of the finest current purveyors of FUNK, SOUL, HIP-HOP, NUFUNK, GHETTOFUNK and REGGAE. Includes EXCLUSIVE tracks from SMOOVE (Jalepeno/ Wack), ANDY TAYLOR (Resense/ Wack), and THE HAWK (Record Kicks) along with ALDO VANUCCI, FEATURECAST and THA 'LIKS massive hip-hop banger from last year, a remix from reggae-remix legend JSTAR and more underground gems than a newly-excavated diamond mine.
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LISTEN TO PREVIEW MIX ONLY (i.e. NOT the album – you get that via the link above) on player below and read full tracklist and PR blah below that:
1. SISTER HENRY & THE PRESCRIPTIONS – My Good Lovin' (Rowed Out)
2. DEEP STREET SOUL – Rollergirl (Freestyle)
3. T BIRD & THE BREAKS – Esmerelda
4. EWAN HOOZAMI– Love, Loves Karaoke (Pig Balls)
5. SMOOVE – I'm A B-Boy (Unreleased)
6. K-DELIGHT & THE VOODOO GURU feat. CHROME – The Wildstyle Dream (Playing Around)
7. THE HAWK feat. LITTLE HANNAH COLLINS – Under My Skin (Unreleased)
8. ALDO VANUCCI, FEATURECAST & THA 'LIKS – Prohibition (Good Living)
9. MAKO & THE HAWK vs. THE BEASTIE BOYS – Too Many Rappers (Not Enough Funk mix)
10. ROGER MOLLS feat. PTATE – High Speed Chase
11. MR DERO vs. JSTAR – No Time To Waste (J-Star remix)
12. ANDY TAYLOR – Know Your Place (Unreleased)
13. SAVANT – The Truth (Crash Course Series)
How dope is this? Things kick off with a trio of underground funk cuts, the first of which is a sweet little mod-soul-funker My Good Lovin' from the UK's very own Sister Henry & The Prescriptions from their He's So Fine EP. Next, Freestyle Record's antipodean secret weapon Deep Street Soul slay you with Rollergirl, the highlight of their debut Chilli Fried EP leaving T-Bird & The Breaks to take up the baton for some heavy duty Texan soul-funk in the shape of Esmerelda off their debut album Learn About It. From here we segue neatly into nu/ghettofunk territory as rising Bristol-based producer Ewan Hoozami chops up old funk and soul 45s for dancefloor banger Love Loves Karaoke and Smoove (or Berry Geordie as we like to call him) presents an exclusive unreleased funky breakbeat bomb in the form of I'm A B-Boy. He's not the only b-boy in on the action either as next up is K-Delight with Wildstyle Dream – the biggest cut off his debut LP Audio Revolution featuring Deftex's mighty Chrome on the mic. Big Boss Man bass-player, The Hawk, changes things up with another exclusive – Under My Skin – his brand-new old-fashioned, northern soul follow-up to last year's huge Don't Judge A Book – also featuring the gorgeous Lil Hannah Collins. Things then head back once more to planet hip-hop with Prohibition – hands down the biggest dancefloor hip-hop bomb from last year (no lie – check it!) – in a giant collabo from Aldo Vanucci (Fatboy Slim's crate-digger), ghettofunk superstars Featurecast and old school hip-hop crew Tha 'Liks. The Hawk then makes a second appearance, this time with DJ cohort Mako, and their classy funk-45 based Beastie Boys remix Too Many Rappers (Not Enough Funk mix) – as played on Craig Charles' BBC Radio 6 Funk & Soul Show! Next, up-and-coming French producer Roger Molls, reminds RJD2 how he used to do it in the best track (High Speed Chase) from the best hip-hop LP (Rewind) you might not have heard from last year showcasing the verbal skills of rapper Ptate. Reggae remix supremo J-Star then takes up the reins with his soulful rnb-ified Mr Dero rerub of No Time To Waste, followed up by the new king of Latin b-boy breaks, Andy Taylor – here presenting our third exclusive and one for the ladies – Know Your Place. Finally U.S. rapper and underground legend Savant keeps it gully right to the end over the horns-driven beat (courtesy of producer Passion Hi-Fi) of The Truth off his brand new Crash Course EP.
Also still available:
MONKEYBOXING.COM presents: Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul Vol. 2
MONKEYBOXING.COM presents: Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul Vol. 3
MONKEYBOXING.COM presents: Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul Vol. 4
MONKEYBOXING.COM presents: Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul Vol. 5
MONKEYBOXING.COM presents: Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul Vol. 6
MONKEYBOXING.COM presents: Filthy Rhythm, Dirty Soul Vol. 7
CREDITS: Massive thanks, props and respect to all the artists involved plus special thanks to The Hawk for his assistance with the mysteries of Photoshop.


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Hesterian Musicism is the creative process through which Karlton Hester's compositional and performance style merge to give rise to aesthetic environments where other musicians, kinetic and visual artists, and poets can meet to produce new art forms through imaginative effort. Its philosophical basis involves an intrinsic freedom of expression, focused and disciplined spontaneity, and a structural basis that explores the creative components of diverse sources from the whole earth. Read More
© www.karltonhester.com , 2015 All rights reserved.
Developed by www.crispinfox.com


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Annual demand for gold in 2012 reached a record $236.4 billion, but in terms of tonnage fell 4 percent year-over-year to 4,405.5 tonnes, according to a new report from World Gold Council.
Central banks, however, bought 534.6 metric tons of gold last year, the highest level in nearly 50 years.
Nevertheless, investor and central bank demand could not offset the drop in consumer demand.
It's worth noting that annual gold demand was still 15 percent higher than the average for the previous five years.
This chart shows the breakdown of gold demand by tons and gold price:
In the fourth quarter gold demand totaled 1,195.9 tonnes, the second highest quarterly figure on record after Q3 2011. In value terms, demand reached $66.2 billion. In the fourth quarter jewelry and central bank gold demand increased, and India accounted for 11 percent of the YoY increase in jewelry demand.
Get the latest Gold price here.


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The following works were valuable sources in the compilation of this Time Line: Lerone Bennett's Before the Mayflower (Chicago: Johnson Publishing Co., 1982), W. Augustus Low and Virgil A. Clift's Encyclopedia of Black America (New York: Da Capo Press, 1984), and Harry A. Ploski and Warren Marr's The Negro Almanac (New York: Bellwether Co., 1976).
U.S. population: 93,402,151 Black population: 9,827,763 (10.7%)
May 10 Charleston, South Carolina. July 13 Gregg and Longview counties, Texas. July 19-23 Washington, D. C. July 27 Chicago. October 1-3 Elaine, Arkansas.
Census of 1920.
U.S. population: 105,710,620 Black population: 10,463,131 (9.9%)
Claude McKay, Harlem Shadows, 1922 Jean Toomer, Cane, 1923 Alaine Locke, The New Negro, 1925 Countee Cullen, Color, 1925


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Big Scale Yamato
Review by JoshB
Sometimes I think I spent my entire youth in front of the television set. My fondest memories as a kid were spent engrossed in the adventures of Starblazers, Voltron, and Battle of the Planets.
If I could live in 1978 forever...
The ultimate irony was that for all of these shows that kids were insane for, there were hardly any toys on the market. No Child World store had the Phoenix from Battle of the Planets.
Pretty much all of those shows have shaped what I collect today. Collectors now have their choice of the nice diecast Godphoenix from UniFive, the Masterpiece Voltron from Toynami and the toy I am talking about today, Bandai's Big Scale Soul of Popynica Space Battleship Yamato. I'm spoiled now, for sure.
But back in the day, I had no Yamato (Or Argo, as it was called in Starblazers). I was teased every day by the images of Starblazers toys on the commercial for Mr. Bigs Toyland. I actually found a piece of wood in the forest behind our apartment that somewhat looked like the Argo. Yeah, I painted that and flew it around the yard. I was Ghetto.
When Bandai announced that they were making a SOP Yamato I went nuts. This was back in 2001, when I was really hesitant about spending top dollar on toys. The thought of a diecast Yamato, all tricked out, made me tremble with excitement.
And then the facts came out. Mostly plastic, ¥20,790 pricetag. Damn, out of my reach. They sold out quickly despite the warm reviews, and prices on the secondary market climbed through the roof. I remember seeing them for as much as $400 at one time.
On my trip to Tokyo in 2003, I didn't find ONE for sale anywhere. Fortunately my good friend Dave offered to sell me his – it was missing a small part on the back, but it was cheaper than retail so I grabbed it. Of course, shortly after that Bandai re-released it and prices on the secondary market went down.
Years later, is it worth it?
The Big Scale SOP Yamato is an interesting piece. As a display model it is excellent. Full of detail and grandeur. But as a toy, not so much.
The Yamato is loaded with gimmicks and action features. At about 17 inches long, it is a lot of ship. Unfortunately, most of the ship is plastic, with diecast being reserved for a section around the bridge and the rear cone of the engine. The toy requires 2xAAA batteries which will give you about 40 minutes of play time.
Lights and Sound
The SOP Yamato features numerous light and sound gimmicks. By pressing the buttons on the right side of the ship, you can activate the features. Effects include:
- Artillery Firing Sound
- Gun Firing Sound
- Pulse Laser
- Alarm
- Engine Ignition
- Engine Start
- Sailing Alarm
Of course, some of these sounds accompany a light up action:
- Wave Motion Gun
- Bridge Lights
- Rear Engine Lights
- Hangar Lights
All of these sound and lights are demonstrated in our video review.
Action Features
Bandai really outdid itself with some of the action features. There really is a lot going on with this piece.
The turrets on the deck each have moveable barrels and by turning a dial on the side, all three cannons move together. The base parts of the cannons are metal.
On the right side of the bow of the Yamato is a door that opens to reveal the inner mechanisms of the Wave Motion Gun. This door pops open by pushing in a button on the other side. By sliding a part on the deck the bolt can slide in to engage the engine.
The rear of the Yamato features a similar action. Pull down on the long horizontal track on the left to open the door, pull down on the right one to activate a spinning gear in the engine.
Located midway on the ship is a set of spring-loaded wings. Press a button and out they pop. I found I really have to push mine back in to get them to stay locked in.
The chimney behind the bridge houses a secret set of missiles. Slide up the oval part on the right side to lift the missiles out of the chimney.
The small cone at the ships bow is removable to reveal the ships radar, as seen in Space Battleship Yamato 2.
Underneath the Yamato is the third bridge – this features an opening door for ground landings.
The anchor on the front of the Yamato can be replaced with the Rocket Anchor, which features a real metal chain.
The Yamato features a rear hatch that can open to accommodate the included fighters. The side door of the landing bay also opens to reveal the bay lights.
Other Goodies
In addition to the Yamato itself, the set also includes several support ships.
- The Cosmo Zero can be mounted on the catapult arm on the rear of the ship
- The Black Tigers can be stored in the hangar bay
- The Cosmo Tiger 2 can be stowed on a small platform that opens behind the small guns on the left side of the ship.
Cosmo Cleaner D
The whole reason the Yamato traveled to Iscandar was to go get the Cosmo Cleaner D – the machine that will clean the radiation from Earth. Yamato included the Cosmo Cleaner D as a model kit that you have to assemble. It's pre painted, so all you have to do is put it together.
The Yamato features a black stand that can hold the Yamato, Cosmo Cleaner D and all support ships.
One would think that all of these things would add up to a great toy. I mean, If I had a toy that did all of these things when I was a kid, I would have been in heaven. Unfortunately I would have destroyed it in 2 seconds. This thing is FRAGILE. There are spiny bits all over the bridge that seem to flick off without warning, never to be seen again. The small spines on the captain's quarters just seem to vanish into thin air. Some of the parts on the rear of the bridge aren't secured properly, and the fins around the engine don't secure tightly at all.
Also there are a few issues with the implementation of some of the gimmicks. Pushing the button on the side to pop out the panel on the front doesn't really work, it just nudges it out a bit, and then you have to get something sharp to pry it open. The wings pop open easily, but you really have to push in past its opening to get them to lock closed.
And then there is the lack of metal. Granted, the toy does have some heft, but it feels so plasticky. At over $200, you would think the thing would be largely made out of metal.
Don't get me wrong, I like it a lot – it's a fantastic looking rendition of the Yamato, It is just not what I was looking for. I want something I can zoom around the room and hand to my kids. This is not that toy. This is something you have in an executive office that gets dusted by the "help" once a week. It may be big scale but it is hardly "Popynica".
Your enjoyment will depend on what you want to get out of this thing. I like it as a display model, but I am still waiting for a great Yamato "Toy" that won't hurt my wallet.
10 comments posted17 inch... wow, that one big toy. I remember seeing this one on a Soul of Chogoukin book. I always like the design, too bad the cost and the size make me rethinking about buying this. Looks like I have to settle for a smaller ship.
Nice Review.
Taito put out a soft vinyl yamato that is about $20 us that seems about the same size. It might be what you are looking for.
CollectionDX Admin
I bought this toy last year when they re-released it.
I don't think I paid over $200. I felt the same way; the tiny pieces are a pain, and it is NOT meant to be played with.
But overall, I still love it, although I am afraid to even touch it.
I saw the Taito one locally. It's a great piece you can "swoosh" around without fear of losing $50 in parts as they fall off into the abyss.
It's out of production - these Taito things are usually one run wonders - but I saw it last night 01-30-08. If you want it, I can try to grab it for you. I saw that Raideen they did too Josh. They're doing a nice big Cosmo too.
It reminds me of the Thunderbirds stuff they did a few years back. I got the TB2 they made and it's a great toy without the price of the Aoshima or the craziness of the Takara releases. As a lucky accident it's scale to the Konami gashapon of the pod vehicles.
I've got the taito one coming to me, as well as captain harlock's arcadia, the trains from galaxy expres 999 and the blimp from queen esmereldas.. all for under $20 each, all from taito. Crazy. I've got the color and black raideen, reviews coming soon. for the price you cant go wrong.
CollectionDX Admin
Where'd you nab the Taito Yamato?
"Hey, uh...let's volt in."
YahooJapan. Tons on there.
CollectionDX Admin
"The chimney behind the bridge houses a secret set of missiles." Chimney?!?!? CHIMNEY?!?!?!? It is called a STACK!!! Just for that nautical insult towards my favorite ship you should give me that TAITO Yamato that you got coming in... or at least hook me up with you contact...
I'm not really sure what's up, but there has been a TON of Yamato love around lately. And I share that love.
thanks for the review. I've been really hopiung to get one of these, and while I appreciate the "unplayability" of this, I'd LOVE to have it on my desk, activating cannons and sending Cosmo Tigers on sortie.
As for that TAITO one...Hory Shid! I want it, if I could find it for that low-low price. Maybe I'll find one when I finally go to Japan in March? We'll see. Definately on the hunt for the Arcadia that comes out in Febuary...
"Hey, uh...let's volt in."
Well, I guess it's time hunting that Taito's Yamato...


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From the National Center for Policy Analysis: http://www.ncpa.org/
There is a major cultural schism developing in America. The new divide centers on free enterprise -- the principle at the core of American culture, says Arthur C. Brooks, president of the American Enterprise Institute.
Despite President Barack Obama's early personal popularity, we can see the beginnings of this schism in the "tea parties" that have sprung up around the country. In these grass-roots protests, hundreds of thousands of ordinary Americans have joined together to make public their opposition to government deficits, unaccountable bureaucratic power, and a sense that the government is too willing to prop up those who engaged in corporate malfeasance and mortgage fraud.
The data support the protesters' concerns, says Brooks:
In "A New Era of Responsibility," the president's budget office reveals average deficits of 4.7 percent in the five years after this recession is over.
The Congressional Budget Office predicts $9.3 trillion in new debt over the coming decade.
Voices in the media, academia, and the government will dismiss them as a fringe movement -- maybe even dangerous extremists. In truth, free markets, limited government, and entrepreneurship are still a majoritarian taste, says Brooks:
In March 2009, the Pew Research Center asked people if we are better off "in a free market economy even though there may be severe ups and downs from time to time." Fully 70 percent agreed, versus 20 percent who disagreed.
Asked in a Rasmussen poll conducted this month to choose the better system between capitalism and socialism, 13 percent of respondents over 40 chose socialism; for those under 30, this percentage rose to 33 percent.
Republicans were 11 times more likely to prefer capitalism than socialism; Democrats were almost evenly split between the two systems.
The government has been abetting this trend for years by exempting an increasing number of Americans from federal taxation, says Brooks:
Adam Lerrick showed last year that the percentage of American adults who have no federal income-tax liability will rise to 49 percent from 40 percent under Obama's tax plan.
Another 11 percent will pay less than 5 percent of their income in federal income taxes and less than $1,000 in total.
Source: Arthur C. Brooks, "The Real Culture War Is Over Capitalism; Tea parties, 'ethical populism,' and the moral case against redistribution," Wall Street Journal, April 30, 2009.
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Have established exporttrade relation
ships with many countries,
For water supply from wells or reservoirs.
For domestic use,for civil and industrial applications.
For garden use and irrigation.
Operating conditions
Maximum fluid temperature up to +35℃.
Maximum sand content:0.25%.
Maximum immersion:100m.
Maximum well diameter:5″.
Motor and Pump
Rewindable motor
Equip with start control box or digital auto-control box
NEMA dimension standards
Curve tolerance according to ISO 9906
Options on request
Special mechanical seal
Other voltages or frequency 60 Hz
Warranty: 1 year
(according to our general sales conditions)
enquiry form:
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text:
was born in Moumea, New Caledonia (a group of islands in the Pacific Ocean) on July 28th 1941. He grew up in Australia, studied at the Sorbonne University in Paris and at the University College of Los Angeles.
He later became a US citizen and worked as a professional actor, screenwriter and film director in California. While still a film student at UCLA he wrote a short subject for his Master's degree which he later turned into the 1970 feature film "Harold and Maude", which was the first film he directed. The film was a box-office flop that turned into a cult success, and combines black humour with Higgins' own preoccupation with sudden death. He directed a total of five films before dying of AIDS on August 5th 1988. He was only 47.


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You all know how much I love cooking with kids, right? Well last week I had the great fortune to spend a day at Nella Cucina's cooking camp for kids. Result? Well firstly, I wish I had gone to such wonderful cooking classes when I was little (no, Welsh Rarebit in Home Economics class in Grade 9 does not quite come close) and secondly, more confirmation that teaching kids to cook is one of the most rewarding and fun jobs one could have!
Described on their website as "a FULL hands-on class, and much more involved than most Kids Camps. [They] cook real food, similar to a regular adult class. This is not a cooking class where kids sit and colour and decorate a few cupcakes!" A truer word was never spoken. The menu on the day I observed was as follows:
Wow – not just challenging in terms of the preparation involved, but also in terms of "would the kids eat the food?".
When I arrived around 10am, most of the kids were there. Some were playing hangman, some were eating the granola bars and fruit laid out on the table, some were helping Chef Pam make a smoothie snack to get the day started. It's a calm vibe in there in the morning that's for sure. The kids have mostly been together since Monday so they are pretty comfortable with each other, the chefs and the routine. As Chef Pam, Chef Vanessa and Chef Joanne get the day underway the go through the menu, cover safety rules, hand out tasting spoons to be kept in pockets at all times and make sure everyone's hands are washed. The kids are divided into three groups, mostly by age and each group will work with one chef throughout the day.
The Chefs organise the menus so that the kids will stop mid-morning to have a snack (that they have prepared). Today's snack was the spiced crackers and hummus (with a bonus "will they eat it?" eggplant dip – baba ganoush). Everyone got down to business:
The kids LOVED the chips and wolfed them down. The dips, well they tried them (one little girl took a look at the hummus and said "I don't know what this is but I will try it!") but didn't eat much, especially the younger kids who happily munched on the chips after they had had the requisite taste of both dips.
After about 15 minutes break during which the older kids chatted and the younger ones played hangman (how refreshingly free of technology this room was!), everyone went back to work.
This carrot salad kept the younger students occupied for a very long time (note to self: excellent recipe to make with the boys in Petits Chefs so that *everyone* has a job at all times!)
The Moroccan chicken kept them busy too!
Well this eggplant salad with Tahini dressing converted more than one self-proclaimed anti-eggplant teen!
This was an amazing restaurant-quality meal – prepared by 7-14 year olds. Incredible.
Surprisingly, many of the kids didn't eat much. Most of them tasted everything (sometimes on request of the Chefs) but many of them ate very little. It was a hot day and a lot of them looked completely exhausted (a long week in the kitchen!) but I was impressed to see how many of them at least tried the food. From my work with kids, I know there's no point forcing the issue and that often, kids might not try something in front of strangers but will happily try at home later. I am betting many of the kids from this week's class will attempt at least one of the recipes they took home.
After an impromptu dessert of ladyfingers and ice-cream ("SCORE!"), everyone went back to work on the dessert which they would take home in decorated paper bags:
Lots of citrusy goodness was happening that afternoon!
Again, the kids worked in three groups on the cupcakes:
What an absolutely fabulous day everyone had (me included!). It definitely gave me some ideas of ways to organise my Petits Chefs (alas, we will still be working in the science lab on single burners next year…) and some different techniques to teach them. Nella Cucina is doing a wonderful job of teaching the next generation that real food is easy and flavourful and totally do-able, even if you are only 7 years old!
For more information about Nella Cucina, check out their website or read my profile about Nella on Spotlight Toronto!


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Jungle News Wednesday - official start - No01
by Roman aka jar
As some of you might remember, there has been some changes on this blog about spam and news and music and all this stuff which sorrounds us - it will be focused in one posting every wednesday. We want to welcome you to the official Jungle News from your MASSIVE VOODOO crazy apes...
No01 of the Jungle News!
C'mon get the Big Band rolling in and take your time reading this, you will not be dissapointed. Let's get it started with some fine jungle music to have you introduced to the Jungle News with full force on your ears - while reading listen to this and take 2 bananas!
You'll find in this issue No01:
2. Jungle Drums (Music from all the apes in here)
3. Inspirational Links
4. Introducing other blogs
5. Kong Fu (whatever this is)
...sidiibbbaaabbbaaaddaaaaaaddddiiiiddiiibbaaaabbbbaaaaaadddaabbbbdabdi! Let's get it on... i hope the song is still playing :)
Show some balls!
Tonight at midnight (Pacific Standard Time) the ultimate ball competition ends. You are still able to participate, there are still some balls rolling in and it is up to you if yours will be with them in the end. Keep them rolling!
We will post all entries in the next days and will do our jury work over the weekend, so i guess next week we'll have the winners announced. Thanks to all who already participated, great to have so many funny and fantastic entries... you are really great!
Here is a countdown that shows you when the competition is over (you can listen to this song when you are still in a hurry about showing your balls, it really motivates!!):
MASSIVE VOODOO WEAR SHOP opened...
Yeaha! Yeah! Yippie! I am very, very, very proud to announce to you that the MASSIVE VOODOO WEAR SHOP is now ready to recieve your orders.
The Apes in the jungle had been busy preparing everything and now is the right time, BUT before you order i would suggest to you that you wait until next monday/tuesday because at this time we will have another competition announced that has something to do with MASSIVE VOODOO WEAR, you won't be dissapointed, i promise you... relax and wait, but if you can't just drop your order.
You will find the MASSIVE VOODOO WEAR store in the upper navigation bar (Store) or simply click here if you are intrested.
MASSIVE VOODOO blog changes
There have been not many changes in the jungle, except an update of the Tutorial section with some fresh banners linking the latest painting and inspiration articles. Also we are planning to make the navigation in the article section easier for you ... not yet, but soon.We'll keep you updated.
What really could bring you tons of information about painting is Yvonne's latest Article on how to do Blendings - Part 1 - don't miss this.
We are also up to Facebook, without knowing the reason, but if you are there too maybe we could welcome you as a fan. You will get there some spam about the most important things sorrounding our little jungle:
MASSIVE VOODOO on facebook
MASSIVE VOODOO Partners
As you already now we have our hobby friends linked up to the left navigation bar. There is another addition today. You won't believe me so you have to look what i found in my mailbox today - let me introduce to you the thoughest super glue on earth:
I will do a review and some glue tests with the ultimate Super glue in the next days and i keep you informed about the ultimate powers of the gorilla super glue and how to get it and how cheap it is and everything. Keep an eye out! It is unbelievable: Gorilla Powers compressed into a bottle of glue... unbelievable. Muchas Gracias to the great team behind this power - you may find Gorilla glue in Germany here!
More information about it soon!
Here goes the first song of the playlist, not really the first but the others you already might know... a pure Happy Painting song, chosen by Roman:
Jumpin Jive - Cab Calloway and the Nicholas Brothers
Here goes the second one, a little more stronger with a lot of power and beauty, chosen by Yvonne:
Anouk - Nobody's Wife
Next song was sent to us by Nick. Thanks a lot for showing us how important the time in little things is in our hobby, chosen by Robert for this addition:
OK go - This Too Shall pass - Rube Goldberg Machine Version
Raffa did chose this song and brings in some electronic bongo vibes:
Extrawelt - Drehfehler
Mati is all about positive vibrations and brings in one of the greatest:
Bob Marley - Positive Vibrations
That's it so far. The MASSIVE VOODOO Jungle Drums Playlist by all 5 Apes can be found here! You also find the Playlist from Roman and see its actualisation by switching to the Favorites in the upper navigation bar. May the muse be with you all!
So far from this Weeks Jungle News. See you next wednesday on the same station - and please let me know via comment if you enjoyed reading this or if i am doing this for no sense at all...
Keep on happy painting!
Your MASSIVE VOODOO APE CREW
representative Roman


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Did you sign up for One Jackson last week? It's a member's only kids' "Indie" clothing site – sort of a cross between Totsy and Threadless.
When you sign up now you get a $10 credit plus free shipping.
They just marked down their current line to up to 50% off. So the cute eye-patched buck t-shirt above is only $1.90 shipped and these long-sleeve Ts are just $3.90. I expect these to sell out very quickly.
And there are hoodies and cardigan sweaters from $8.90 (after the sale and $10 coupon code).
Most items are available in sizes 2-6 only.
Note that your $10 credit is automatically applied when you sign up via this link.
Thanks, Sam.


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I hadn't meant to disappear on you, and what's worse, I have a terrible excuse: I took a nap. In the same week that I conquered my cooking Mount Everest — a lasagna I'd only dreamed about for the better part of six years, one that still took me many tries in the kitchen to get right and more than a week just to write — I was going back and forth with my publisher over the page designs for my cookbook, and (no doubt) giving some poor book designer some gray hairs. One day, I'll remind my editor about that time I said that I didn't care how the book looked, "just make it pretty!" and she'll snort coffee out her nose. It will probably be a while. Nevertheless, the day after I posted the lasagna recipe, we finally found something that made everyone happy and now they're designing the remaining hundreds of pages and that night, I think I slept a million hours. I did the same thing the next night and on the third night, when I yawned at 9 p.m. and said I was thinking about calling it a night my husband — who is the one who typically has a bottomless capacity for sleep and I'm the one who pops up at 7:30 even when it's my turn to sleep in — looked at me like I had two heads. I… just had a lot of catching up to do.
We're also officially in the part of the year I affectionately call The Dregs of Winter. It's not spring yet, in fact, it will at least a month before anything tasty or green emerges from the earth and another month after that before they will be good enough to eat. It's not actually snowy and pretty enough out there to bliss out in a New York Winter Wonderland; in fact, it's just cold and a little dull. Typically, the way I get through the blahs of winter is not to sleep through them but to begin plotting an escape. I start pining for someplace tropical, please, where the deep blue ocean meets the bright blue sky at a horizon so far away, it's almost unfathomable to this city dweller, whose current vista is little more than the building across the street. And so I think about it, think long and hard about it, a book open on my lap, my fingers wrapped around a frosty, fruity cocktail with an umbrella and then I fly home a few days later, my usual ghost-like complexion faintly less so and my brain cleared of thoughts that don't include "Is it time to reapply?" and "Are we too old to go on the water slide that leads to a swim-up bar?" You know, weighty matters.
Alas, this daydream of a trip is still two very long weeks away, so I sublimated my wanderlust, as I always do, in baked goods. I cannot will warm weather here or myself to warm weather sooner but I can make a breakfast muffin with the suggestion of a place with no winter. I still stuck to my muffin rules — muffins are breakfast food, not just cake, though I have yet to convince this guy — so it includes a good helping of whole wheat flour, lots of good yogurt. And then I supplied the coconut two ways, one with shredded coconut and the other with a relatively new-to-me ingredient, coconut oil. Coconut oil is wonderful, but you probably don't need me to tell you that. Besides having a lightness to it that comes from fats that are solid at room temperature (think: shortening, but with a heavenly flavor), it imbues each crumb with a dreamy whiff of coconut. The resulting muffin is dense but light and impossibly moist and will, I hope, be an effective temporary stand-in for the warm weather to come.
One year ago: White and Dark-Hearted Brownies, Green Bean Salad with Pickled Red Onions and Fried Almonds and Spaghetti with Lemon and Olive Oil
Two years ago: Chocolate Souffle Cupcakes with Mint Cream, Spaghetti Cacio e Pepe, Monkey Bread with Cream Cheese Glaze, Cauliflower and Caramelized Onion Tart
Three years ago: Alex's Mom's Stuffed Cabbage, Toasted Coconut Shortbread, Devil's Chicken Thighs + Braised Leeks and Red Kidney Bean Curry
Four years ago: Best Chocolate Pudding, Pasta Puttanesca + Broken Artichoke Hearts Salad
Five years ago: Sour Cream Bran Muffins, Mom's Chocolate Chip Meringues and Dill and Cottage Cheese Bread + A Whole Bunch of Breadmaking Tips
Double Coconut Muffins
Although these are a fine muffin, fragrant with coconut and filled with a dense, moist crumb as written below, the potential for adaptation is almost endless. First, you could make them triple coconut muffins (and dairy free) by using coconut milk instead of yogurt, but I do like the texture that the tangy yogurt imparts and these muffins have no lack of coconut flavor. You could make mango-coconut muffins by adding a cup or so of diced mango chunks to the batter; pina colada muffins would use the same volume of pineapple chunks. You could replace the yogurt with mashed banana or banana puree to make a banana-coconut muffin and if you're into that whole lime-in-the-coconut thing, you could add a teaspoon of lime zest. Chocolate chips? (1 cup), Macadamia nuts? (1/2 to 3/4 cup, toasted and chopped)… Really, I'm just getting started.
If your yogurt and egg are not at room temperature, they will re-solidify the coconut oil, which is fine for baking but makes the batter quite thick and difficult to stir, like a cookie batter. (Uh, see my photos above.) But, it all works out. It's much easier, however, if you let the ingredients warm up.
Yield: 10 standard muffins, though this seems off to me and I suspect that some of you will tell me you made a dozen (as I'd expected to).
1/2 cup (110 grams) virgin coconut oil
3/4 cup (95 grams) all-purpose flour
1/2 cup (60 grams) whole wheat flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon table salt
1 cup (230 grams) full fat Greek-style yogurt, at room temperature is best
1/3 cup (65 grams) granulated sugar
1 large egg, at room temperature is best
1 teaspoon (5 ml) vanilla extract
3/4 cup (90 grams) sweetened shredded coconut, divided
Preheat oven to 375°F. Either grease 10 muffin cups with butter or coconut oil, or line them with papers.
[Oh, you're out of paper liners too? Cut parchment paper into 5-inch squares and form them into your empty muffin cups, pressing any creases flat. They won't stay put until you fill them with batter, and you should make sure you push that batter down so it gets into the corners, but otherwise, they should work as well as the real deal.]
In a small saucepan, warm your coconut oil just until it melts. It should still be on the cool side.
In a medium bowl, whisk together your flours, baking powder and salt. Stir 1/2 cup shredded coconut. In a separate bowl, whisk together egg, sugar, coconut oil, yogurt and vanilla. Stir into dry ingredients until just combined. Divide batter among prepared muffin cups then sprinkle the top with remaining 1/4 cup coconut, about 1 to 2 teaspoons on each.
Bake until a tester inserted into the center comes out batter-free, about 20 minutes. Transfer muffins to a rack and let cool.
Do ahead: Usually, muffins are best on day one but I just had one of these on day three and found them almost as moist and tender as day one. Store in an airtight container at room temperature.


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30 Nights | NOBLE CRUSADE
You will visit the following 24 places:
Newcastle upon Tyne
Newcastle upon Tyne, often shortened to Newcastle, is a city and metropolitan borough of Tyne and Wear, in North East England. Situated on the north bank of the River Tyne, the city grew as an important centre for the wool trade and it later became a major coal mining area. The port developed in the 16th century and, along with the shipyards lower down the river, was amongst the world's largest shipbuilding and ship-repairing centres. These industries have since experienced severe decline and closure, and the city today, is largely a business and cultural centre, with a particular reputation for nightlife.
Copenhagen is the capital and largest city of Denmark. This "friendly old girl of a town" is big enough to be a metropolis with shopping, culture and nightlife par excellence, yet still small enough to be intimate, safe and easy to navigate. Overlooking the Øresund strait with Sweden just minutes away, it is a cultural and geographic link between mainland Europe and Scandinavia. This is where old fairy tales blend with flashy new architecture and world-class design; where warm jazz mixes with cold electronica from Copenhagen's basements. You'll feel you've seen it all in a day, but could keep on discovering more for months. Copenhagen is considered a very liveable place because of its cleanliness. It's considered as one of the very environmentally friendly cities because its harbour can be swum in and about a third of the city's people use bicycles as their means of transportation. In their downtown area, the places to visit and to be entertained at are the Tivoli gardens and the Town Hall Square. If you want the very cultural and scenic areas the places to see are the Marble church, the Rosenborg castle, and the Christiansborg.
Paris is the capital and largest city in France, situated on the river Seine in northern France, at the heart of the Île-de-France region. The city of Paris, within its administrative limits largely unchanged since 1860, has an estimated population of 2,193,031, but the Paris metropolitan area has a population of 11,836,970, and is one of the most populated metropolitan areas in Europe. In 2009 and 2010, the city has been ranked among the three most important and influential cities in the world, among the first three "European cities of the future" according to a research published by Financial Times and among the top ten cities in the world in which to live according to the British review Monocle. The city is the home of the most visited art museum in the world; ''the Louvre'' as well as the ''Musée d'Orsay'' noted for its collection of French Impressionist art, and the ''Musée National d'Art Moderne'' a museum of modern and contemporary art. The notable architectural landmarks of Paris include Notre Dame Cathedral (12th century); the Sainte-Chapelle (13th century); the Eiffel Tower (1889); and the Basilica of Sacré-Cœur on Montmartre (1914). In 2014 Paris received 22.4 million visitors, making it one of the world's top tourist destinations. It is also known for its fashion, particularly the twice-yearly Paris Fashion Week, and for its haute cuisine, and three-star restaurants. Most of France's major universities and grandes écoles are located in Paris, as are France's major newspapers, including Le Monde, Le Figaro, and Libération.
Belfast (meaning: "mouth of the sandbanks") is the capital and largest city of Northern Ireland, the second-largest city in Ireland after Dublin, and is situated around the River Lagan, which runs through the city. It is a port city known as the birthplace of the RMS Titanic, and for its political murals, documenting the 'Troubles' of the 20th century. Today, Belfast remains a centre for industry, as well as the arts, higher education, business, and law, and is the economic engine of Northern Ireland. The city suffered greatly during the period of conflict called "the Troubles", but latterly has undergone a sustained period of calm, free from the intense political violence of former years, and substantial economic and commercial growth. Additionally, Belfast city centre has undergone considerable expansion and regeneration in recent years, notably around Victoria Square.
New Haven
New Haven in the U.S. state of Connecticut, is the principal municipality in Greater New Haven. It is the second-largest city in Connecticut. It was founded in 1638 by English Puritans, and a year later eight streets were laid out in a four-by-four grid, creating what is now commonly known as the "Nine Square Plan", now recognized by the American Institute of Certified Planners as a National Planning Landmark. The central common block is New Haven Green, a 16-acre (6 ha) square, now a National Historic Landmark and the center of Downtown New Haven. New Haven is the home of Yale University. The university is an integral part of the city's economy, being New Haven's biggest taxpayer and employer. Health care (hospitals and biotechnology), professional services (legal, architectural, marketing, and engineering), financial services, and retail trade also help to form an economic base for the city. New Haven had the first public tree planting program in America, producing a canopy of mature trees (including some large elms) that gave New Haven the nickname "The Elm City".
Belgium's second largest and international port city with history dating to the Middle Ages, Antwerp is a major destination in Belgium in the region of Flanders. It has a beautiful historic city center, and is world-renowned for its fashion industry. Renowned for being the "world's leading diamond city", more than 70% of all diamonds are traded in Antwerp. Due to its long and culturally rich history, the city of Antwerp houses many interesting historical buildings from different historical periods, as well as a lot of interesting museums. Recently it has become a trendy city, attracting a lot of Flemish and foreign artists, writers, intellectuals, and actors.
Admiral Street Police Station (Merseyside Police)
Liverpool is an important city of Merseyside, England. It was founded as a borough in 1207 and was granted city status in 1880. It is a major city famed for culture, football teams, The Beatles and buzzing nightlife. It lies within the historic county boundaries of Lancashire. It is also a large, vibrant city with great cultural heritage and was awarded the title of European Capital of Culture 2008, with the famous Pier Head Waterfront being a UNESCO World Heritage site since 2004.
Southampton is the largest city in the county of Hampshire on the south coast of England, and is situated 120 kilometres (75 mi) south-west of London and 30 kilometres (19 mi) north-west of Portsmouth. Southampton is a major port and the closest city to the New Forest. It lies at the northernmost point of Southampton Water at the confluence of the River Test and River Itchen, with the River Hamble joining to the south of the urban area. The local authority is Southampton City Council, which is a unitary authority. Just over a quarter of the jobs available in the city are in the health and education sector. A further 19 per cent are property and other business and the third largest sector is wholesale and retail, which accounts for 16.2 percent. Between 1995 and 2004, the number of jobs in Southampton has increased by 18.5 per cent. Southampton has always been a port, and the docks have long been a major employer in the city. In particular, it is a port for cruise ships; its heyday was the first half of the 20th century, and in particular the inter-war years, when it handled almost half the passenger traffic of the UK. Today it remains home to luxury cruise ships, as well as being the largest freight port on the Channel coast and fourth largest UK port by tonnage, with several container terminals. Unlike some other ports, such as Liverpool, London, and Bristol, where industry and docks have largely moved out of the city centres leaving room for redevelopment, Southampton retains much of its inner-city industry.
Oslo is a county and municipality, as well as the capital and largest city in Norway. Oslo was established as a municipality on 1 January 1838. Founded around 1048 by King Harald III "Hardraade" of Norway, the city was largely destroyed by fire in 1624. The Danish–Norwegian king Christian IV moved the city, rebuilding it closer to Akershus fortress, as Christiania (briefly also spelt Kristiania). In 1925, the city reclaimed its original Norwegian name, Oslo. The diocese of Oslo is one of the five original dioceses in Norway, which originated around the year 1070.
Hamburg, a major port city in Germany, is connected to the North Sea by the Elbe River. It has a well-deserved reputation as Germany's Gateway to the World. It is the country's biggest port and the second-busiest in Europe. Hamburg is proud of its status as a "Free and Hanseatic City" and thus shares the same status as a province, making up one of Germany's 16 federal-states or Bundesländer. The city is also a notable tourist destination for both domestic and overseas visitors; it ranked 16th in the world for livability.
Riga is the capital and largest city of Latvia, a major industrial, commercial, cultural and financial centre of the Baltics, and an important seaport, situated on the mouth of the Daugava. With 706,413 inhabitants (2010) it is the largest city of the Baltic states. Riga's territory covers 18.60 square miles and lies between 1 and 10 metres (3.3 and 33 ft) above sea level, on a flat and sandy plain. Riga's historical centre has been declared a UNESCO World Heritage Site, and the city is particularly notable for its extensive Jugendstil (German Art Nouveau) architecture, which UNESCO considers to be unparalleled anywhere in the world.
Dublin South
Dublin is the largest and capital city of Ireland. The English name is derived from the Irish name Dubh Linn, meaning "black pool". It is a primate city with an urban population of over 1 million, containing almost 25% of the country's population. Dublin is situated near the midpoint of Ireland's east coast, at the mouth of the River Liffey, and at the centre of the Dublin Region. The city is listed by the Globalization and World Cities Research Network (GaWC) as a global city, with a ranking of "Alpha-", placing it among the top thirty cities in the world. It is a historical and contemporary centre for education, the arts, administration, economy and industry.
Gothenburg is the second-largest and a major city in Sweden, situated off the Göta älv river on the country's west coast. The City of Gothenburg was founded in 1621 by King Gustavus Adolphus of Sweden. An important seaport, it's famed for its Dutch-style canals and leafy boulevards like the Avenyn, the city's main thoroughfare, lined with many cafes and shops.
The Convent Amsterdam
Amsterdam is the capital of the Kingdom of the Netherlands. It is the country's largest city and its financial, cultural, and creative centre. Many large Dutch institutions have their headquarters there, and seven of the world's 500 largest companies, including Philips and ING, are based in the city. In 2012, Amsterdam was ranked the second best city in which to live by the Economist Intelligence Unit (EIU) and 12th globally on quality of living for environment and infrastructure by Mercer. Amsterdam derives its name from the city's origin as "Dam" of river "Amstel". In the past, the name was "Amstelredamme" which later changed as "Amsterdam". The city is one of the most popular destinations in Europe, attracting over 7 million international travellers annually. The city is colloquially known as ''Venice of the North'' because of its lovely canals that criss-cross the city, its impressive architecture and more than 1,500 bridges. There is something for every traveller's taste here; whether you prefer culture and history, serious partying, or just the relaxing charm of an old European city!
Stockholm - Sweden's capital and largest city, and the most populous city in the Nordic region. Without a doubt, Stockholm is one of the most beautiful cities in Europe. The city is made up of 14 islands connected by some 50 bridges on Lake Mälaren, which flows into the brackish Baltic Sea, and passes the Stockholm archipelago with some 24,000 islands and islets. The city is a cosmopolitan place with both classical and modern architecture, and a captivating Old Town, Gamla Stan. Today, the area is an atmospheric mixture of buildings surrounded on all sides by a latticework of medieval lanes and alleyways.
Tallinn is the capital and largest city of Estonia. It occupies an area of 159.2 km2 (61.5 sq mi) with a population of 412,144. It is situated on the northern coast of the country, on the banks of the Gulf of Finland, 80 km (50 mi) south of Helsinki, east of Stockholm and west of Saint Petersburg. Tallinn's Old Town is in the list of UNESCO World Heritage Sites. Tallinn is ranked as a global city and has been listed among the top 10 digital cities in the world. Tallinn is a European Capital of Culture for 2011, along with Turku, Finland.
Helsinki is the capital and largest city in Finland. Finland's major political, educational, financial, cultural, and research center as well as one of northern Europe's major cities, Helsinki was ranked the most liveable city in the world, in 2011. Approximately 75% of foreign companies operating in Finland have settled in the Helsinki region. The nearby municipality of Vantaa is the location of Helsinki Airport, with frequent service to various destinations in Europe and Asia. Today, Helsinki pulls off the trick of being something of an international metropolis while still retaining a small-town feel. The best time to visit is in summer, when Finns peel off their overcoats and flock to outdoor bars and cafes to enjoy the sunshine.
Moscow is the capital, the most populous city, and the most populous federal subject of Russia. The city is a major political, economic, cultural, scientific, religious, financial, educational, and transportation centre of Russia and the world. A global city, Moscow is the most populous city on the continent of Europe and the seventh largest city proper in the world. Its population, as of 1 January 2010, is 10,563,038. For many, the sight of the Kremlin complex in the centre of the city is still loaded with symbolism and history. It was the capital of the former Soviet Union and signs of its previous life are very visible even now. Yet, there's more to Russia and its capital than just memories of the USSR.
Warnemünde is a seaside resort and a district of the city of Rostock in Mecklenburg, Germany. It is located on the Baltic Sea and, as the name implies, at the estuary of the river Warnow. Founded in about 1200, Warnemünde was for centuries a small fishing village with minor importance for the economic and cultural development of the region. Today, it's known for its long beachfront and marina, a cruise-ship stop.
Kristiansand, historically Christiansand, is a city and municipality in Norway. It is the fifth largest city in Norway and the municipality is the sixth largest in Norway. Tourism is important in Kristiansand, and the summer season is the most popular for tourists. Kristiansand Zoo and Amusement park is the largest zoo in Norway. It receives over 900,000 visitors every year. Markens Street is the main pedestrian street in downtown Kristiansand. Bystranda is a city beach located in Kvadraturen; in addition, Hamresanden beach is the longest beach in Kristiansand. Hamresanden Camping is a popular family camp during the summer season. The city hosts a free concert in downtown Kristiansand once every week in the summer. Outside the city is the industry park Sørlandsparken, which has Sørlandssenteret, the largest mall in Norway.
An Cobh
Weymouth, Massachusetts
Weymouth is a city in metropolitan Greater Boston. It is one of fourteen Massachusetts municipalities that have applied for, and been granted, city forms of government but wish to retain "The town of" in their official names. It is named after Weymouth, Dorset, a coastal town in England. It is the second-oldest European settlement in Massachusetts. Weymouth contains the Weymouth Back River and the Weymouth Fore River; its surroundings, formerly industrial, are now set aside as parks and natural areas including Webb Memorial State Park. There are also a lot of streets named after people and trees.
Greencastle, Indiana
Greencastle is a city in Greencastle Township, Putnam County, Indiana, United States, and the county seat of Putnam County. Founded in 1821 by Ephraim Dukes on a land grant, Greencastle was a village or town operating under authority of the Putnam County commissioners until March 9, 1849, when it became a town by special act of the local legislature. The city became the county seat of Putnam County. Located near Interstate 70, Greencastle is also well known as being the location of DePauw University.


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Woman Gets Glued to a Toilet Seat at Walmart
To glue or not to glue, that is the eternal question. When the gluing being referred to concerns someone's posterior and a toilet seat, you'd like to think there wouldn't be any type of glue involved whatsoever. For one very unfortunate individual in a Kentucky Walmart, that simply wasn't the case.
When a shopper went into a stall to take care of business, she found she couldn't get up when she was done. Her butt had been glued to the toilet seat.
And to make matters even worse, her backside had been super glued to the porcelain ring. Imagine the fear and the humiliation that must have set in. The poor woman had to stay seated for almost an hour, until paramedics were finally able to remove her, along with the toilet seat (still attached to her rear end) from the bathroom and take her to the hospital.
Once she made it to the emergency room, hospital staff somehow managed to separate her tushy from the toilet seat. We're not exactly sure how this procedure was carried out, but we can only image that the women in question lost a fair amount of sensitive skin.
The police aren't sure if this was an accident, or if someone set a trap for the woman by coating the seat with superglue. If the act was intentional, not only was it exceedingly malicious, but it was also against the law. Either way, we're pretty certain this unlucky shopper won't be rushing into a Walmart bathroom again any time soon.


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GBH Openvault
Eric in The Evening
as aired on WGBH 89.7 2 discs: Hour 1 and Hour 2
License Clip
This program cannot be made available on Open Vault.
More material may be available from this program at the GBH Archives. If you would like research access to the collection at GBH, please email firstname.lastname@example.com.
- Series
- Eric in The Evening
- Series Description
Eric in the Evening debuted in 1981 with host Eric Jackson, a Boston jazz radio legend. The program features the best in jazz, in-depth looks at great artists, live interviews, and performances from the WGBH studios. Jackson's personal, mellow manner of presentation quickly made him one of WGBH's most popular personalities, interviewing and hosting live performances with a rich roster of talent from Wynton Marsalis to Ornette Coleman to Dizzy Gillespie.
In 2012 Eric Jackson received the Duke Dubois Humanitarian Award from JazzWeek, a recognition of his commitment to jazz, jazz radio, jazz education and generous service to the jazz community. Series release date: 1981
- Asset Type
Broadcast program
- Media Type
- Topics
- Music
- Music
- Citation
- Chicago: "Eric in The Evening," 06/22/2005, GBH Archives, accessed March 1, 2024, http://openvault.wgbh.org/catalog/A_75FE651C2EF8430E8DA9C1C0CF24E6C0.
- MLA: "Eric in The Evening." 06/22/2005. GBH Archives. Web. March 1, 2024. <http://openvault.wgbh.org/catalog/A_75FE651C2EF8430E8DA9C1C0CF24E6C0>.
- APA: Eric in The Evening. Boston, MA: GBH Archives. Retrieved from http://openvault.wgbh.org/catalog/A_75FE651C2EF8430E8DA9C1C0CF24E6C0