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Baker, Russell (Wayne)
Russell (Wayne) Baker 1925–
American nonfiction writer.
Baker is a highly regarded, widely read newspaper columnist and humorist. While serving on the Washington bureau of the New York Times during the mid-1950s and early 1960s, Baker earned recognition for his wry commentaries on the federal bureaucracy, many of which formed the basis of An American in Washington (1961). Since 1962, Baker has written the "Observer" column in the Times. The essays in this column satirize such issues as politics, the economy, and popular culture. Baker is especially praised for his insight into the human condition, particularly the daily problems of ordinary people.
Many of Baker's columns have been published in collections: No Cause For Panic (1969), Poor Russell's Almanac (1972; revised, 1982), and So This Is Depravity (1980). In 1979 Baker was awarded the Pulitzer Prize for distinguished commentary for his columns. He is the first humorist to win the award in that category since its inception in 1970. Baker's critically acclaimed autobiography Growing Up (1982) earned him another Pulitzer Prize in 1982. The book chronicles Baker's childhood and family life during the Great Depression. The quiet humor and the lack of melodrama in his portrayal of that era prompted critics to compare Growing Up to the works of Mark Twain. In a style which is understated yet powerful, Baker describes personal hardships with subtle emotion. Growing Up is considered a notable work of Americana. The Rescue of Miss Yaskell and Other Pipe Dreams (1983) is a recent collection of Baker's essays.
(See also Contemporary Authors, Vols. 57-60 and Contemporary Authors New Revision Series, Vol. 11.)
Virginia Kirkus' Service
Russell Baker, a New York Times Washington correspondent, gets a lot off his chest [in An American in Washington] writing about Washington as a tribal entity, filled with bizarre customs. Considerable information is packed into chapters satirizing Society, Bureaucrats, Diplomats, Congress, the Presidency, etc. But the style is difficult, overcrowded with metaphors, and only fairly successful in its humor…. A sketch book, in which the individual scenes are sharper than the end view, and more satisfying in its occasional vignettes and insights. (pp. 765-66).
A review of "An American in Washington," in Virginia Kirkus' Service, Vol. XXIX, No. 16, August 15, 1961, pp. 765-66.
William H. Stringer
The only thing worrisome about [An American in Washington, a] wild Lord Bryce's guide on how Washington's denizens behave, is that someone may regard it as true to life.That said, one can proceed to report that this Coney-Island-mirror view of the waltzings and posings and peccadilloes of Washington's politicians, hostesses, cocktail-party givers, am-bassadors, congressmen, State Department officials, newsmen and the President himself is witty, sardonic, blasé, irreverent, and often funny.
A lot of American humor these days is not soft and chuckling, poking fun at one's self as well as others, in the Will Rogers tradition. Russell Baker of The New York Times has the wit but not the gentleness. His guidebook portrait of a Washington of rogues, name-droppers, obfuscators and belabored bureaucrats reaches from one end of Pennsylvania Avenue to the other, and provides not a dull moment.
Unfortunately, he wrote before the full flavor of the Kennedy administration set in. Much of the Kennedy Washington is thus unmined. And there's this one warning: Washington is more bearable, humane, kindly, even idealistic, than we're told here. This book is, of course, for laughs.
William H. Stringer, "Laughter on Pennsylvania Avenue," in The Christian Science Monitor, October 16, 1961, p. 9.
Sidney Hyman
[Russell Baker] has written a book whose laughter better serves the cause of what is truly serious and solemn than any thundering from a pulpit. The author's finely tuned moral and esthetic instincts have been jarred in equal measure by the disfigurements Washington produces in some men, and by the nation's unwarranted fear of its own capital. However, the reformist counter-attack Mr. Baker mounts in "An American in Washington" resembles a prose-cartoon, and not the Book of Deuteronomy. It is fluently drawn, epigrammatically succinct, and by turning every instance of the ludicrous into a "rule of prudence" makes the ludicrous all the more apparent.
To put the matter directly, "An American in Washington" is offered as a "practical guide to survival" in the nation's capital, and as a contribution to "easing the tensions between the United States of America and the District of Columbia." Why this? Well, says Mr. Baker, most Americans look upon Washington as "an unworthy place where men of mean talents but cunning proclivities conspire to inconvenience people beyond its frontiers." In fact, the widely held notion that the place is "more dangerous than Moscow" helps explain why Presidential hopefuls often promise the country that if elected, "they will work American's vengeance on Washington."
Mr. Baker admits that Washington does indeed have its dangers, and not only for the newly arrived American who thinks he has come to a patch of friendly motherland. Even some of Washington's "most famous men have had knives placed so professionally in their backs that they have learned about it only by reading the next morning's newspapers."...
(The entire section is 685 words.)
John Martin
Russell Baker is perhaps the funniest newspaper columnist there is, and, after Murray Kempton, the finest stylist in contemporary journalism. Regrettably, his lyrical and wildly inventive social satire has until now been limited to appearances in the drab and leaden columns of the New York Times. [No Cause for Panic] not only takes him out of the Times but should put him on the shelves of connoisseurs of first-rate humor.
Ninety-four of Baker's best are reprinted here. They are topical and they are choice.
There is the foreign ambassador puzzled by American football: "Huge men repeatedly flung themselves beast-like upon a much smaller man who was holding the prolate spheroid." An American official replies: "That, Mr. Ambassador, is called playing the game." (pp. 84-5)
And there is the inimitable Baker fantasy: "Spring came to Washington this week. Naturally there was a cocktail reception for her."
What's puzzling about reading Baker is that it's hard to be sure whether he stays with you or you stay with him. I left him rolling through a bowl game: "Gumcrack up over the ball. Flanker guards roll left, splitback in motion to the right … field judge and head linesman ready for the short flare, Simian on the handoff…." (p. 85)
John Martin, in a review of "No Cause for Panic," in America, Vol. 112, No. 3, January 16, 1965, pp. 84-5.
Gerald Gottlieb
Baker's method [in No Cause for Panic] is irony rather than whimsy, sarcasm rather than ranting. His material is the entire United States of America and his talent is of matching size. He is capable of parody, poetry, galloping fantasy, wistful poignancy, and the simple sneer. He holds himself in constant contempt of Congress, and with grisly joy predicts a time when that body, clogged and rusted at last into utter immobility, will be made a branch of the Smithsonian Institution. On the subject of government gobbledygook he writes like a scathing James Joyce working the Washington beat. Testy, inventive, sardonic, he polishes off his book with a glorious gabble of disdain for television. All is suffused with a realistic intelligence, a cold humor, and an even colder irony—not the least of which resides in the title.
Gerald Gottlieb, "They Could Laugh Dying," in Book Week—The Sunday Herald Tribune, May 16, 1965, p. 16.∗
Virginia Kirkus' Service
Baker's squibs and brief forays have an uncommon ability to touch the center of our private perceptions. His subject [in All Things Considered] is the modern U.S. culture as viewed through the eyes of the New York Times—our 100-eyed cultural Argus…. He revamps the plots of Anna Karenina by Henry Miller, Heidi by Terry Southern, Huckleberry Finn by James Baldwin, A Tale of Two Cities by Joseph Heller, Wuthering Heights by Tennessee Williams, and The Iliad by Norman Mailer, and does it amusingly. Most often, while enjoying Baker, one has the sense of being in even when he is talking about the relative intelligence of dolphins, cats and men. He is quite...
(The entire section is 160 words.)
Eliot Fremont-Smith
Russell Baker, The New York Times "Observer" columnist, is one of the two funniest and more enlightening commentators on the Washington scene. (The other is Art Buchwald.) Mr. Baker's latest book ["Our Next President"] … tells "The Incredible Story of What Happened in the 1968 Elections." It is not the first spoof on the upcoming Presidential campaigns, nor will it be the last….
Mr. Baker's new scenario provokes one or two chuckles, but what is interesting about it is that it is so unfunny. The publishers seem to have recognized this, calling it a "nightmare" and a "political horror story" and wrapping the book in funereal black….
As a spoof, however (which would provide an...
(The entire section is 490 words.)
Erwin D. Canham
For a journalist there's nothing, so to speak, like getting ahead of the news. So [in Our Next President] Russell Baker has written the story of the 1968 presidential election in advance. He does it delightfully. And in many respects, he could be right.
In one or two details, the facts have already caught up with Mr. Baker. He did not anticipate George Romney's pullout. He did not anticipate Senator Eugene McCarthy's strong showing. But let us not be picayune. The crystal ball is bound to be clouded here and there.
Mr. Baker is the humor-affairs columnist of the New York Times' editorial page. Being funny three times a week is a devastating assignment. Mr. Baker keeps up with...
(The entire section is 403 words.)
R. Z. Sheppard
In the old fairy tale, the grumpy king runs a contest to find a jester who can make him laugh. Unsuccessful contestants go to the block. The winner gets a new suit of motley and the next-to-impossible job of making the king laugh again. In journalism, the dyspeptic despot is usually played by an editor who starts off saying something like "This page is too damn dull. It needs some humor." Serious words are then circulated among the clever headline writers and droll city-room pinochle players that there is an opening for a funny columnist.
If the editors and readers are lucky, they may get a durable broad-ax wit like Art Buchwald. If they are very lucky, they find someone like Russell Baker…. At his...
(The entire section is 343 words.)
Phil Elderkin
Reading "Poor Russell's Almanac" is a lot like visiting the Internal Revenue Service—with somebody else's tax return!
If you have ever changed a flat tire in the rain, tripped over the flowers on the rug or spilled gravy on your Aunt Agatha's canary, then this book is for you.
Actually, it is not really a book at all but a collection of essays. Russell Baker, the author, is extremely talented at stroking a platitude until it purrs like an epigram.
While Baker tries to pass himself off a genuine character in most interviews, he is really a self-styled one. No man who describes himself as a decaying boy, and still has to duck his head to clear any doorway under six...
(The entire section is 341 words.)
Kirkus Reviews
"Observer" columns from Russell Baker are the perfect light-beer chasers for the hard-stuff of daily news—but few of the short pieces in this pleasant, bland collection [So This Is Depravity] stand up well to the sterner tests of time and hard-cover compilation. The most obvious sufferers from the format, of course, are dated columns on the political scene—lots on Watergate—that are usually common-sensical enough …, yet often over-simplified and a bit preachy. But other pieces that should be less frayed by time—on inflation, language (the "Have a nice day" craze), the sexual revolution, city living (parking, cabs, noise), marriage, parenthood, taxes—also tend to seem rather limp in...
(The entire section is 250 words.)
JOSEPH McLELLAN
You can begin quoting Russell Baker in this collection [So This Is Depravity], as you can begin reading him, almost anywhere. Open at random to "The Humble Dollar" (you will have to track it down; his latest book has no table of contents), and you come up with a small gem:
"The papers keep saying that the dollar is very weak. This is nonsense. The truth is that the dollar is absolutely powerless. I sent one for a pound of cheese the other day and it was thrown out of the store for giving itself airs."
It's all there in that quote: the timeliness, the air of crisis, the sweeping generalization and the quick, absurd illustration that puts everything in context and makes you...
(The entire section is 1161 words.)
Mary Lee Settle
What do you say about a memoir that has made you cry, made you laugh, brought back streets, sounds and hours of your own growing up and helped you look at them with more tenderness? In Russell Baker's "Growing Up," that is what can happen to anyone who has known, in childhood, the rural South, when, as the family sat in their rockers in the evening, "nothing new had been said on that porch in a hundred years." This is not the dirt-poor South of easy fiction. With sensuous grace, incisive recall and an evocation of daily language that is the poetry of the inarticulate, he recreates a place where there is dignity and ambition and an inflexible social and economic hierarchy run by women. (p. 1)
(The entire section is 468 words.)
Richard Lingeman
As we all know from reading the higher fan journalism, funny people are really deeply unhappy. They had childhoods that make Charles Dickens's blacking factory seem like Charles Ryder's golden summer with Sebastian at Oxford.
And so I approached Russell Baker's autobiography, "Growing Up," with high anticipation, expecting a heartening read about someone more miserable than I am. Alas, I was deeply disappointed. To come straight out with it, Russell Baker, who writes funny stuff three times a week for his Observer column in The New York Times, ruined my day. This is not the kind of book one can put down with a contented sigh: "That poor son of a bitch." Instead of being a grim tale of drunken...
(The entire section is 874 words.)
Joe Mysak
[In Growing Up] Russell Baker, the New York Times "Observer" columnist, turns his talent to autobiography. The results are as happy as his fellow Baltimorean H. L. Mencken's were when he ventured into the form in his Days books. Baker has shown his readers some of this material before—notably in 1979, the year he won the Pulitzer Prize—but the story is especially well told here…. This is as much the story of Lucy Baker's struggling against the Depression as it is of her son's growing up, and it is often quite moving. The Bakers' circumstances were somewhat unusual, but the story and the characters are familiar ones. Here are the usual assortment of jobs and ne'er-do-well relatives. There is...
(The entire section is 219 words.)
John Lukacs
[Russell Baker] writes serious funny things usually with the purpose of pointing out absurdities, including economists' prevarications, the pretensions of technology, and government prose that has not noticeably improved during the Reagan monarchy. Whatever the targets of his attacks, Russell Baker is a defender of the greatest heritage of this nation—of which conservatives ought to be more respectful than they often are—the American English language. Within the New York Times Russell Baker compares as a grammarian to the house conservative William Safire somewhat as Red Smith compares to Howard Cosell. But Baker is more than a grammarian. He is a master of the American language.
(The entire section is 598 words.)
Publishers Weekly
As expected, nothing is immune to Baker's unique comedic observations—the MX missile ("Merrily We Pentagon"), New Yorkers' dogs ("Beastly Manhattan"), Marcel Proust ("Things Passed")—in [The Rescue of Miss Yaskell], the title piece being a charming evocation of boyish fantasy. This gathering will entertain first-time readers, refresh the risibilities of fans and do much to elevate the status of the personal essay.
A review of "The Rescue of Miss Yaskell: And Other Pipe Dreams," in Publishers Weekly, Vol. 224, No. 8, August 19, 1983, p. 60.
(The entire section is 82 words.)
A. J. Anderson
Few things soften and grow moldy quicker than collections of stuff written for newspapers. But Baker … [survives] very well when pressed between the covers of a book…. The 100 or so of his columns tied together [in The Rescue of Miss Yaskell and Other Pipe Dreams] have nothing in common except that all are written in an easy, slippered prose. Always observant, Baker is in turn reminiscent, fanciful, serious, thought-provoking, and downright funny. Among his topics are Brideshead Revisited, Leo Buscaglia, and "The Male Weepie." Probably there are things that do not interest him, but they must be few and far between….
Many fans will be glad to recover some of their favorite pieces...
(The entire section is 144 words.)


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On behalf of the Delaware State University Faculty Senate, "Welcome!" Faculty participation in the shared governance of DSU is more important than ever. As the chair of the faculty senate I ask that you stay involved with the vital issues facing the University. In our goal to go paperless, the minutes, proposals, reports, upcoming agenda, etc. are posted for your examination on the Faculty Senate Forum on Blackboard.
If your department has not already, please forward the names of your Faculty Senator(s) and alternate(s) for the current academic year to me (email@example.com [1] ) and the Vice Chair, Myna German (firstname.lastname@example.com [2]). Stephanie Milbourne is the Senate recorder (email@example.com [3]).
Several openings are available on our senate committees. These committees are an excellent opportunity for every faculty member to provide service and leadership to the university, get to know other faculty and staff, and do the valuable work of the faculty senate. Email the me to get involved. Your service counts.
Respectfully submitted,
Jan Blade, Chair, Faculty Senate.
Unless otherwise ordered by the Board of Trustees, authority is hereby delegated to the university faculty to develop and administer the academic and educational policies of the university in accordance with the provisions of the following regulations.
The Faculty shall:
- Establish departmental curricula and courses.
- Develop rules, regulations and discipline for the student body.
- Determine educational academic policies of admission.
- Determine requirements for degrees and recommend candidates for degrees, which shall be conferred by the
President of the University under the authority of the Board of Trustees.
- It shall be the privilege of the faculty:
- To recommend to the Board of Trustees the establishment of any degree to be awarded and the disestablishment of any degree.
- To consider matters of general interest to the university and make recommendations to the President of the University for presentation to the Board of Trustees. (Chapter 2, Section II)
Function: The Faculty Senate is the primary governing body of the faculty. It shall serve as a channel of communication between the faculty and the administration and, through the administration, to the Board of Trustees. It shall seek means to raise the level of all aspects of professional performance. It shall be the instrument by which the faculty carries out its responsibilities under the Charter and Bylaws of the Board of Trustees of Delaware State University. [Article I, Section 2]
Responsibilities : The Faculty Senate is the chief governing body under the authority of the faculty. It shall possess the primary responsibility and authority to review, discuss, and make policy recommendations in such areas as curriculum, standards, research, faculty status, honorary degrees, and student activities related to the academic life of the University. [Article I, Section 3]
Duties and Responsibilities of Faculty Senators:
- Faculty Senators are expected to attend all Faculty Senate meetings.
- Faculty Senators are expected to communicate to their respective departments all actions of the Faculty Senate.
- Faculty Senators are expected to communicate to the full Senate any of their respective departmental concerns.

subset: commoncrawl


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Hi Anton,
I confirmed that a guitar with a piezo bridge and the CTRL-X will pass magnetic signal if the battery dies or is removed. Only the piezo signal will be affected.
Hi Anton,
I confirmed that a guitar with a piezo bridge and the CTRL-X will pass magnetic signal if the battery dies or is removed. Only the piezo signal will be affected.
Thank you!
And what about the possibility of using Graphtech Ghost piezo pickups with L. R. Baggs Ctrl-X preamp? Can you say something about it?
Hi Anton,
The CTRL-X was designed to apply a nominal +3dB of gain to the piezo signal by the presence of the FET transistor at its input. The piezo pickup needs to be of relatively high output(like that of the LR Baggs X-Bridge or T-Bridge signals) so it can be attenuated, if necessary, to match the level of the magnetic pickup(s).
I'm fairly certain the Ghost pickups should be of high enough output for compatibility with the CTRL-X.
Thanx a lot! )
HI Bryan. My 9 volt battery for my older godin LRBaggs 12 string has come unsoldered from the circuit board on the top of the guitar. Where on the board do I raattach the - and +? Thanks, Adrian
Hi Bryan:
I have a Fender flattop with a factory pickup that has died on me. I'm thinking about replacing the Fender component with an Anthem. My questions are these:
1. I used the current rig with an Baggs Para Acoustic DI. I liked it for its ability to add gain, provide EQ and a notch. Will the use of a PADI be possible and/or needed with the Anthem?
2. The current Fender wiring exits the body through a 1/4" jack in the lower bout. I see that the Anthem installation instructions call for a 1/2" hole in the tail block instead. Will I still be able to use the current hole or will I need to drill the tail block?
Olympia, WA
Hi Terry,
1. The Para Acoustic D.I. is not required for interfacing the Anthem to an amp or PA system but it can be just as useful for optimizing gain, dialing in a better tone with its EQ and its signal routing capabilities.
2. Provided the output jack location is sturdy enough, the endpin jack can be mounted on the lower bout. for the endpin jack, however, I'm inclined to suggest you add some reinforcement to the inside of the mounting location.
Thanks for the quick response! That's very helpful. I'm glad I can keep the PADI in the circuit path. It's been very useful. I'll plan on adding some extra material to the inside of the lower bout in order to stiffen it at that point. Maybe something 2" square and 3/16" thick or so, shaped to fit the contour of the lower bout. I can rig up some kind of through-hole clamp to hold it in place while the glue dries.
Mahalo nui loa!
Olympia, WA
This is possibly a dumb question [I'm just a piano player], but our school was given a Babicz Spider acoustic with the "Element" unit mounted in it. Both on the Babicz webpage and here on lrbaggs.com the photos and specs on this unit show a small battery drawer that pops out. My unit doesn't have a battery compartment that I can see. The front has volume, treble, mid, and bass pots as well as a little green "battery" light but I'll be @#$%^& if I can figure out where the battery goes... I unscrewed the thing from its mounting but didn't see any battery or battery connectors. Any help?


text:
At the 4th World Islamic Economic Forum
Kuwait, Kuwait
29 April 2008
Prayers and peace be upon the purest of messengers, our Master Mohammad, the honest Arab Prophet,
I would like to start by thanking His Highness the Emir Sheikh Sabah Al Ahmad Al Jaber Al Sabah for his brotherly invitation to me to participate in this distinguished conference.
Greetings and my appreciation to all the presidents and business and economic leaders who enrich this forum with their gracious presence and valuable contributions.
My thanks are also due to all those in charge of the World Islamic Economic Forum that constitutes a valuable platform to share views and explore solutions to crucial economic issues that affect the lives of our Islamic societies.
Thank you, all. Your Highness, my friend, I know you will allow me to express the deepest appreciation to you and to the people of Kuwait, for your great hospitality and welcome.
This notable gathering is the first World Islamic Economic Forum to be held in the Middle East. It is an honour to be part of this event, and to join all of you today.
My friends,
This is no ordinary international meeting. What you achieve here, and the effort you carry forward, will have an impact on our countries' most profound goals:
- Whether and when our countries will achieve their economic targets - for development, growth, and opportunity, especially for our youth;
- Whether our countries, together, can create the economic community we need, to sustain our people against global financial and energy shocks and other challenges;
- Whether Muslims, not only in Islamic countries, but everywhere in the world, will have access to the economic promise of the 21st century;
And whether our community can achieve its rightful place in the global economy ... not just sharing in prosperity, but in helping to write the economic rules ... giving voice to Islam's values of co-existence, justice, and a better life for all.
This Forum brings together leaders from across the spectrum of Muslim society, to answer these questions and more. Such a gathering recognises the huge role of economic alliances in our era. Across the world, regional and trans-national communities and partnerships are providing platforms for economic success. By working together, member states boost prosperity within their group, and compete more effectively worldwide.
We can be grateful for the many efforts of the Organisation of the Islamic Conference, to spearhead economic cooperation and development. Our countries have made significant advances. Trade among our economies has risen. Most of our economies have seen their GDP rise at rates well above the global average.
Yet we all know it: our countries' unmet potential is still far too large. The 57 member-states of the OIC have a combined GDP that is only one-fourth that of Europe – below, even, the GDP of France. Our share of world trade remains in the single digits – completely unacceptable. Development remains incomplete, and our challenges multiply.
My friends,
We have all the assets needed to change this reality.
Our combined resources and geo-economic position make the Islamic world key to every major economic issue of our time - from creating a green global economy, to energy sustainability, and more.The world Muslim population is almost one-fifth of humanity, and predominantly young, giving us a significant force for productivity and market growth.
With one-quarter of the world's landmass, the Islamic countries are channels to every corner of the global marketplace.
We stand on a long Islamic history of enterprise and learning - and we are empowered by the unity, values, and purpose of Islam.
Now is the time, working together, to marshal these assets. None is more important than our people. Among our countries, we have one of the largest youth cohorts in the world.
They are full of ideas, energy and vitality. Yet there is a perennial shortage of skilled manpower. In the Arab world alone, 70,000 university graduates leave each year - that's nearly one-quarter of our graduates. Of those studying abroad, half do not come home. Not only are we losing their expertise – which is key to the future of business, science, education and other priorities. But we are also losing their local knowledge – a mine of cultural and national understanding, needed to shape development to the needs of our people and ensure success.
We need to break this cycle. Many of our countries have taken bold steps to advance private-sector, trade-led growth, and the jobs and development it creates. But to meet our goals – to truly help our people realise their aspirations – we must also do more to unleash the potential of our creative class. Above all, this means restoring the tradition of innovation in the Muslim world. Our governments, companies, and development leaders must support innovation, with the same deliberate approach that we apply to building infrastructure or attracting investment.
All must engage. We need strong, comprehensive alliances that can draw on the resources and expertise of government, business, education, the media and other key sectors. In Jordan, prominent players, both local and international, have come together to advance a major initiative on innovation in education. Within four years, the return on investment has been phenomenal. New technologies have accelerated, teaching skills have expanded, students have gained knowledge at a world-competitive level. Obviously, the growing pool of talent has near- and long-term benefits for Jordan's business community. But there are immediate benefits to participating companies, as well – from their local reputation for leadership to knowledge transfer with their global counterparts.
As this experience is replicated in other nations, the world Muslim community will see an even greater return on investment. This is a lesson in the value of partnership, both among our countries and among our companies. There are many other areas where our partnership can multiply our impact – in sustainable energy, water resource management, biotechnology. I am sure this forum's participants can identify even more.
My friends,
In these and other areas, our success will create opportunity for our growing populations and demonstrate to young people what can be achieved through knowledge, initiative, and co-existence. Nothing is more important to our future. We can and must begin – not simply to catch up, but to set the pace for all nations.
Centuries ago, Muslim enterprise created worldwide trade. Muslim thinkers pioneered the science of economics. We know how to succeed. The heritage and promise is right here in this room, in our entrepreneurs and experts, forward-looking officials and leaders of civil society.
It is you, and your colleagues across the Muslim world, who will create alternatives for our youth – power not powerlessness; opportunity, not frustration; hope not anger.
It is you who will restore the great Islamic tradition of science, research and innovation, creating an environment that supports and encourages young minds.
And it is you who will create a future of true global progress; one that engages all countries and cultures in mutual respect; one that opens opportunity to all.
I know that over the next few days, this Forum will actively discuss many such issues affecting Islamic countries. I hope each and every one of you will share your knowledge and ideas. Then, I urge you, in days ahead, to carry the dialogue and partnership forward. The action starts with one person, making one phone call, one keyboard click, one meeting, one handshake - one by one, Muslims across the world, making the partnership and potential real. Let that one be you.
Thank you very much.


text:
Talmage, UT 84073
Hi, Blueroof 360.
My name is
and I have a question about Talmage
You can respond by either emailing me at
or call during
My Question Is:
Estimated Monthly Payment$5,051
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- Status: Active
Listing courtesy of Freedom Realty Corp.
STEAMBOAT MOUNTAIN SUBDIVISION-PHASE 5-LOT 8. New Subdivision! Be the first to pick the best lot! A few lots have power available. One lot has a well. All others are off grid. In the scenic foothills of the Uintah Range! Good Pinion and Juniper trees! Classic Utah geology! Near Rock Creek, Upper Stillwater, and Moon Lake! Minutes to the National Forest! Possible seller financing! Directions: Take highway 40 to Duchesne. Turn north at the stoplight. Proceed approximately 10 miles to 2750 north. Turn west and proceed to the 'T.' Turn north to 3000 north. Then west to the Jeep Trail. You are there! Bring your agent. Call ahead. The gate is locked.
Interior Features Include:No Information Available.
Exterior Features Include:
Acreage: 20.2400 Acres
Lot: Additional Land Available, Equestrian Access, Excl. Mineral Rights, Excl. Oil/Gas Rights, Terrain: Flat, Terrain: Grad Slope, Terrain: Hilly, Terrain: Mountain, View: Mountain, View: Valley
Other Features Include:
Subdivision: STEAMBOAT MOUNTAIN 5
Irrigation Not Available
Taxes 1
School District: Duchesne
Information deemed reliable but not guaranteed accurate. Buyer to verify all information.The multiple listing information is provided by Wasatch Front Regional Multiple Listing Service, Inc. from a copyrighted compilation of listings. The compilation of listings and each individual listing are © 2014 Wasatch Front Regional Multiple Listing Service, Inc., All Rights Reserved. The information provided is for consumers, personal, non-commercial use and may not be used for any purpose other than to identify prospective properties consumers may be interested in purchasing.


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By Scott Hunter
September 5, 2012 | LXXII, No. 23
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A young motorcycle rider from Nespelem died today when he failed to make a curve on SR 155 in Coulee Dam.
Jason Chuckulnaskit, 28, hit the guardrail as he headed south just past the high school at Aspen Street at 11:45 Saturday morning.
He was driving a blue 2004 Yamaha YZFR6/S.
The Washington State Patrol is investigating the cause of the accident.
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https://www.dropbox.com/sh/t3ggycyu6tw85ju/o41i_nouZcTEAWARE ONLINE INTRO
This will be my modest attempt at establishing an online teaware site which will hopefully grow to include several potters working in various styles and regions in the world. My goal is to establish relationships with potters working in the genre of teaware, particularly Asian style teaware, and consign or purchase collections of their work for resale. This will enable me to offer work of high quality and artistic merit at very reasonable prices.
I am not certain if I will confine my selections to those potters who live and work in Asia as there are many who live in other parts of the world who produce excellent wares. It just might be easier to manage this if I limit the work to Asian sources. I will leave the door open and see who walks in.
To kick off this new venture, I am proud to offer the work of:
Seong-il lives and works in Boseong, South Korea. Boseong is located in Jeollanam-do province in the southwest of Korea, and, is a large producer of teas. You can see the lovely hills covered in verdant green tea bushes just about everywhere. In the midst of this, Seong-il produces teaware in his studio using stoneware, porcelain, and, onggi clays. He fires primarily in a gas kiln and on occasion, woodfires. He is what I would call a creative potter, stepping out of the traditional mold and creating lyrical yet practical implements for making and drinking tea. His is a rustic, yet, sophisticated style of teaware that makes a statement. I hope you enjoy his work as much as I do.
PURCHASING WORKS: From now until May 25, 2011, I have special pricing for Seong-il's teapots, $99. + shipping. Please ask questions about any of the work.
SHIPPING: Seong-il's work will be either drop-shipped from South Korea directly to the buyer or shipped from Bangkok, Thailand. We ship worldwide. Shipping costs will be actual and will be quoted depending on weight and type of service. All shipping costs will be paid by the buyer.
GUARANTEE: If buyer is not satisfied with a purchase, they will have 5 days to notify me and arrange for a return. Buyer will bear all shipping charges both to them and any return back to me. Item must be returned in original condition. We will make all efforts to pack well and ship promptly.
PAYMENT: Until further notice, all payments will be made through Paypal. Contact me directly for payment instructions. Please PM me on Teachat with any enquiries.


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22 Members of the Class of 2014 Commit to Service
BUFFALO, NY – Twenty two members of the Canisius College Class of 2014 will dedicate the next year to living simply, working for social justice and serving those who live on the margins of society. The students have committed to one year of post-graduation service work in various cities and communities across the country, with such organizations as the Jesuit Volunteer Corps, Mercy Volunteer Corps and AmeriCorps.
"We want our graduates to become sensitive to people on the margins as they go out into the world in a variety of jobs," says Luanne Firestone, associate campus minister. "These unique service experiences open them up to a real human connection with individuals whose lives are completely different than theirs. Perhaps more importantly, we hope that within that distinct reality, our young alumni will learn more about themselves."
Nine young alumni will serve as AmeriCorps members during the coming year.
AmeriCorps tutors and mentors disadvantaged youth; fights illiteracy; helps build affordable housing; works to improve health services; manages or operates after-school programs; and helps communities respond to disasters.
The students who will serve at AmeriCorps Builds Lives through Education (ABLE), in Buffalo, NY; are:
- Maria Aja
- Brad Beiter
- Jessica Bliss
- Brigette Bragg
- Rebecca Goggins
- Nicole Goyette
- Erica Jackson
- Kaitlyn Richert
- Lindsey Lauren Visser
"Before attending Canisius I had never performed community service or volunteer work," says Rebecca Goggins. "But after participation in Campus Ministry's Immersion Week during freshman orientation, my eyes were opened and I realized the person I wanted to be was someone who served others." Goggins will teach students in a Buffalo Charter School. "I now know that the opportunity to work with students from underprivileged backgrounds in a high-risk, urban setting is my calling," she adds.
Twelve young alumni will dedicate the next year to additional service organizations. They are:
- Leah Biddle, Annunciation House, El Paso, TX
- Kaitlyn Buehlmann, Rostro de Cristro, Guayaquil, Ecuador
- Liam Doherty, Urban Catholic Teacher Corps, Boston, MA
- Andrew Genco, Lalanne Service Program, University of Dayton, OH.
- Kathleen Johnson, St. Joseph University Alliance for Catholic Alliance Program, Philadelphia, PA
- Mary Maroney, Cristo Rey Jesuit Alumni Volunteer Corps, Chicago, IL
- Megan Marrano, Lutheran Volunteer Corps, Minneapolis, MN
- Victoria Niedzielski, Mercy Volunteer Corps, Navajo Reservation
- Jazmine Robinson, Boys Hope Girls Hope, Detroit, MI
- Stephanie Schmalz, Amate House, Chicago, IL
- Alexander Vilardo, Alumni Volunteer Corps, Buffalo, NY
- Anna Vuich, Teach for America, San Antonio, TX
"Both in my Canisius classes and during my study abroad experience in Spain, I have become aware of other cultures and the struggles of certain communities," says Anna Vuich, who will teach at a bilingual elementary school. "Naturally I want to help in any way that I can. I believe that during my year of service I will grow tremendously and learn from people whose perspectives are different from my own. I believe such experiences are the only way I will continue to feel complete as a person."
One young alumna, Brittany Dorsey, will serve as a member of the Jesuit Volunteer Corps (JVC). JVC assists in education, advocacy and direct and community service for low-wage earners, homeless, unemployed, refugees, individuals diagnosed with AIDS, elderly, street youth, former gang members, abused individuals, mentally ill, developmentally disabled, and others who strive to find justice in their lives. Dorsey will serve at St. Luke's Clinic in Camden, NJ.
Canisius is one of 28 Jesuit universities in the nation, and the premier private university in Western New York.


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We understand that cost is a vital factor in your college choice. Even more important, however, is the consideration of value received in exchange for that cost. With our commitment to making quality affordable, Wayland transforms college cost into educational investment.
Because of the contributions of so many who believe in Christian higher education, the cost of an education at Wayland is among the lowest of any accredited, private, senior university in the South. The allocation to the University's operating fund by the Baptist General Convention of Texas, gifts from alumni, friends and individual churches, as well as a growing endowment, contribute to the University's ability to reduce the cost of attending Wayland.
In addition to this, the aggressive approach of Wayland's Financial Aid Office has resulted in financial assistance for over 95% of our full-time students. Through institutional, state, and federal programs, Wayland makes available both merit and need-based assistance.
Meet our wonderful staff
|"You are the reason I am here. I love working with students, helping
them find resources to pay for their education, and watching them
grow. God has given me a servant's heart and the opportunity to make
the difference for students attending Wayland. You will also make a
difference for me. Together, we can Seek Your Dream."
Mrs. Karen LaQuey
|"I am responsible for all phases of student loan processing, and am available to counsel students on the responsibilities of borrowers when accepting a loan, as well as when they leave school and enter repayment. I enjoy the Christian atmosphere of our workplace, and I hope that the love of Christ can be seen through us here in the Financial Aid office."
Mrs. Kathy Gwyn
Associate Director / Loan Coordinator
"I was nervous about re-entering the workforce after being a stay-at home Mom for several years. However, God led me to Wayland and I am now beginning my tenth year in the Financial Aid Office. Being a graduate of Texas Woman's University myself and a proud mother of
"I have been with Wayland since 2006. I complete the verification and awarding process for our external students. I work closely with the financial aid counselor at your campus. I believe that higher education is so important for the direction of the future. I have found the people in Financial Aid really care about each student. The reason I like it here is that I feel what we do is so important, by helping the students reach their goals and meet their financial needs."
"I have worked for WBU since April of 2000. I feel that this is where God led me when I was looking for a job. The Christian atmosphere here at Wayland and especially in our office is phenomenal. The students are great and when we can see that we have made a difference in their lives it is the most amazing thing. I have always liked working with young adults and feel this is why God opened the door for me to be at Wayland. "
"I have been with Wayland since August 2001. I have 15 years experience in the banking field, along with experience as small business owner
"I have worked for WBU for more than 10 years in financial aid. I
"I am proud to be a member of the Financial Aid team since December 2012. Having this door opened has been such a blessing. Coming into the Financial Aid office with no experience, I feel it is not only my duty, but a privilege to assist each student anyway feasible. I enjoy the Christian atmosphere at Wayland, both personal and professional. The opportunity to help WBU students achieve their educational goal is special because it is part of God's plan to see His children grow and develop in the most positive ways."
Amber Coleman
"I have been very blessed to have the opportunity to work at Wayland Baptist University. The environment of Wayland is so uplifting and encouraging. Helping people is a passion of mine, and I get to do it every day in the Financial Aid Office."
Kayla Fore
Financial Aid Loan Specialist
"I believe God has made it possible for me to be here working with young adults. I am excited to be able to help make a difference in life."
Tiffany Davis
Administrative Assistant


text:
Lace Festival Romper
Sold Out
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We require this information to understand your needs and provide you with a better service, and in particular for the following reasons:
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Hello, i would like to know if i can use this theme with Adsense, i mean, i need an adsense optimized theme. This theme seems to be awesome Is there any option in the theme config?
Best regards
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text:
Public Health England has been established to protect and improve the nation's health and wellbeing and to reduce inequalities. It will lead on the development of a 21st-century health and wellbeing service, supporting local authorities and the NHS to deliver the greatest possible improvements in public health.
This is a legacy website containing content from the North East Public Health Observatory, now part of Public Health England's Knowledge and Intelligence Team (Northern and Yorkshire). Existing tools and legacy information will continue to be available here, but new information will be published on the Public Health England website and data portal.
Local News and Events
For national news & events, see www.gov.uk/phe
- New Dementia Prevalence Report Published for North East England
- PHINE Analysts Forum
- New Organisation and Contact Details
- Preparation for pregnancy in women with diabetes 2008-2010 Report from the Northern Diabetes in Pregnancy Survey (NorDIP)
- Launched today The Community Mental Health Profiles UPDATE 2013
- Perth, Australia Charter for the Promotion of Mental Health and Wellbeing
North East England Respiratory Profiles 2013
The North East England Respiratory Profiles provides insight into the impact of respiratory diseases in local areas covered by Clinical Commissioning Groups (CCG) in the region. The profiles enable health & social care practitioners and commissioners to compare the patterns of COPD and Asthma in their locality with other CCG areas in England.
Community Mental Health Profiles 2013
The Community Mental Health Profiles is an open access tool showing a profile of key mental health indicators for each Local Authority in England. It is used to help commissioners, providers, also service users at a local, regional, and national level to compare patterns of mental health needs in their area. Data can be explored using a web tool or downloaded as a PDF for each area.
Local Health Profiles 2012
Local health profiles describe the health of the local population and enable comparison of indicators describing health and determinants of health at local, regional and national levels. The 2012 health profiles can be accessed via the Health Profiles website.
European Health Profile Tool
The European Health Profile tool presents health data from the I2SARE project through interactive maps and charts, enabling the comparison of health and socio-economic indicators, health care systems and health care financing of the countries included in the tool.
Latest publications
For national publications, see www.gov.uk/phe


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The formula is simple; identify an everyday life "problem" that impacts a large number of people. Next step, create a product or service that solves the problem and deliver the solution (your product or service) to the people who have the problem. This is entrepreneurship. This is the formula that I was taught while starting companies in Silicon Valley, this is the formula being served up in incubators and accelerators across the globe, this is the formula used by social entrepreneurs to solve some of the world's most pervasive problems.
You may have noticed that this formula is limited. Yes, the summary above is dramatically simplified, however its limitations have more to do with the substance of the formula and less to do with its simplicity.
The problem with the "problem solution paradigm" is that it lives in a vacuum. Solutions rarely target the root cause of an issue. Instead, we live in a world of "fixes" and cover-ups which often augment the problem rather than providing a sustainable solution. Thus what is a created is a problem-based economy that relies on the perpetuation of problems, so they can be solved by market based solutions.
Within this paradigm, we rarely take into account the entire scope of the problem, and the unlimited number of variables that give life to the problem. We think small and create the insignificant.
Silicon Valley has been purveyors of this paradigm through the long tail of new startups and investors. Facebook and the mobile marketplace have created an ecosystem that supports an astonishing breadth of companies fueled by investors expecting many companies to fail but quick and ample returns from those who succeed (startup expert Steve Blank sums it this phenomenon here).
Lets admit it, small problems are easier to solve and therefore are more likely provide a financial return. From this vantage point changing the world looks a whole lot less attractive.
If we as social entrepreneurs are committed to creating a better world above all else, it will take a paradigm shift, and a commitment to shifting paradigms. It will require a departure from problem solving to becoming catalysts for true transformation.
It will take social entrepreneurs that have the vision and audacity to disrupt outdated systems, an unwavering commitment to people and the earth, and the ability to look beyond traditional theories of change.
It will take investors and networks like Omidyar Network with their priming the pump approach to sector driven impact investing. Like Singularity University that asks their students to solve a problem that will positively impact a billion people.
It will take a new long tail that creates global change from the bottom up, using social enterprise and responsible business practices as its vehicle.
It is time to invest in a new formula. A formula where positive social transformation is the output. Think beyond the fixes and cover-ups, and to think about creating sustainable social change.


text: Another song is out, the last one from the 4 song sampler CD to have a video. It's a MaccaSpan homebrew, it's terrific and starts & ends strongest IMHO (the video part that is- the song is strong all along). The song is one of my absolute faves on the album, "Dance 'Til We're High"!!! There are five tracks that feel "of a piece" to me, and they are my faves: Sing The Changes, Sun Is Shining, Dance 'Til We're High, Lifelong Passion (Sail Away) & Is This Love. Here's the vid link:


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Curvature Effects in Lipoprotein Fusion
Lamberg, Antti
Permanent address of the item is: http://URN.fi/URN:NBN:fi:tty-2011091614807
Publication type: Diplomityö
Issue date: 2011-09-07
Language: en
Pages: 56 p.
Examiner: Vattulainen, Ilpo
University: Tampereen teknillinen yliopisto
Faculty: Luonnontieteiden ja ympäristötekniikan tiedekunta – Faculty of Science and Environmental Engineering
Department: Fysiikan laitos – Department of Physics
Degree Programme: Teknis-luonnontieteellinen koulutusohjelma
High and low density lipoproteins (HDL and LDL, respectively) are of tantamount interest to studies on human health, as these cholesterol transporters are highly involved in cardiovascular diseases, the leading cause of death in the industrialized world. While HDL acts to prevent cholesterol from building up in excess, the larger LDL particles may get stuck inside artery walls, fuse with other LDL particles and finally burst out from the wall, causing a stroke. The fusion of simpler systems has been studied for decades, but the details of lipoprotein fusion and the factors promoting fusion remain elusive. In this Thesis we studied the effect of varying surfactant composition to lipid droplet fusion, which form the core of lipoproteins. Pressure profiles have been suggested to give a quantitative picture of how properties of interfaces, such as interfacial tension arise. These profiles have been studied by physicists for a long time, but it was only relatively recently that a biological relevance was postulated and a new interest surged. While experimental techniques are still not refined enough to probe these biological systems because of their extremely small sizes, in the last few years it has become computationally feasible to carry out research in relevant length and time scales. Using pressure profile calculations, we vary the surfactant compositions of HDL/LDL based lipid droplets so as to keep some quantities constant while varying others. From simple systems, it is known that interfacial tension is the most important factor in fusion and phase separation. Using large-scale computers to run a steered molecular dynamics simulation method developed by us, we show that the fusion rates of lipid droplets are greatly affected by their lipid composition and that interfacial tension alone cannot explain this tendency. We explore alternative explanations and their feasibility. /Kir11
Copyright: This publication is copyrighted. You may download, display and print it for Your own personal use. Commercial use is prohibited.


text: Men's Assistant Hockey Coaches Named It was already assured that Hamline's men's hockey team would have a new look when practice starts next week. New head coach Doc DelCastillo has now detailed how new a look his coaching staff will have.DelCastillo announced that Dave Dochniak, Scott Meyer, Tim Ostroot, Kasey Yoder, Sam Eccles and Mitch Ryan will serve as assistant coaches for the 2012-13 season. In addition, Michaela Olson has been named an Administrative Assistant. "I am excited to get on the ice with the guys and with our players," DelCastillo said. "We have a lot of work to do and a short time to do it in. But this staff has a wide variety of experience and ability. That will make the transition easier." Eccles, Ostroot and Yoder have previous HU ties. Eccles served as an assistant with the Pipers last season. Ostroot, who works in the admissions office at the school, spent six seasons as the chief recruiter for then coach Scott Bell (2005-11). He helped find many of the players who would form the nucleus of the team's MIAC championship and NCAA appearances. Yoder played hockey and football for two seasons at Hamline before transferring to Augsburg to concentrate on the latter sport. He spent two seasons working with Duluth Marshall's program and has been coaching in the junior ranks for the past three seasons. Dochniak was the head boys' hockey coach at St. Paul Harding for 13 seasons. He has been the head coach for the Minnesota Blades AAA team since 2003. Meyer, who will coach the goalies, played 89 games at St. Cloud State and then three years professionally in the East Coast and American Hockey Leagues (2001-04). He comes to the Pipers after working in the USHL for the past three seasons. Ryan played for Minnesota-Duluth and St. Cloud State. His hockey coaching pedigree includes time spent working at Orono High School and with the Upper Midwest High School Elite League. Olson served as the Housing and Academic Coordinator at Alexandria (NAHL) while DelCastillo was the head coach there. The Pipers hit the ice for their first official practice Monday, October 15. They open their season with a pair of games at the MIAC Hockey Showcase at Fogerty Arena in Blaine. Hamline will face Gustavus Adolphus on Friday, October 26 at 5:00 p.m. They will play Concordia on Sunday, October 28 at 2:30 p.m.


text: LANSING COMMUNITY COLLEGE CURRICULAR GUIDE Substance Abuse Certificate of Achievement Curriculum Code: 0239 (Effective Fall 1999 - Summer 2004) A substance abuse worker is an individual with specialized knowledge and skills in the area of substance abuse, including its causes, treatment, and prevention strategies. The certificate is designed for individuals who have achieved a degree and wish to focus their skills in the substance abuse area. Two semesters of field work are required. It takes five semesters to complete this curriculum. PREREQUISITES Students should see the "Course Descriptions" section of this catalog or the Course Schedule for course prerequisite information. Basic skills assessment and advising information may be found on page 8 of this catalog. INFORMATION Contact the Human, Health and Public Service Careers Department, Gannon Vocational-Technical Center, Room 175, telephone number (517) 483-1410. REQUIREMENTS TOTAL: 35 CREDITS CODE TITLE CREDIT HOURS HUSE 100 Introduction to Human Services 3 HUSE 101 Personal Dimensions/Human Serv 2 HUSE 112 Introduction/Substance Abuse 3 HUSE 240 Substance Abuse: Spec Pop/Adol 3 HUSE 241 Substance Abuse Prevention 3 HUSE 242 Chemically Dependent Family 3 HUSE 244 Sub Abuse:Treatment, Intrv 3 HUSE 286 Substance Abuse Practicum I (See Note 1) 4 HUSE 288 Substance Abuse Practicum II 4 SOWK 203 Social Work Interviewing 3 WRIT 121 Composition I 4 MINIMUM TOTAL 35 NOTES: 1. There is an application process and guidelines for admission into the field placement component. Students should meet with a program advisor to develop a plan to meet all field work prerequisites. Applications are due by April 1 for admission to Fall field placement. Application packets with current requirements are available beginning in January from the Human, Health and Public Service Careers Department, Gannon Vocational-Technical Center, Room 175. Contact a program advisor for further information. 2. HUSE 100, HUSE 112, HUSE 286, HUSE 288, and SOWK 203 must be completed with a minimum 2.5 or better. All other required HUSE courses must be completed with a minimum 2.0 grade or better. 3. Students should plan to begin this curriculum summer semester. SUGGESTED COURSE SEQUENCE Students should see course descriptions to find out when departments plan to offer courses. Students who for any reason are unable to follow the course sequence suggested below (for example, those who are part-time, have transferred in courses from another school, or have prerequisites to fulfill) should contact an academic advisor or counselor for help with adjustments. I II III IV HUSE 112 HUSE 100 HUSE 240 HUSE 286 WRIT 121 HUSE 101 HUSE 241 HUSE 242 SOWK 203 HUSE 244 V HUSE 288


text:
Lawsuit Questions Bowman's Ties in United HealthCare Case
by Mark Friedman on Monday, Mar. 23, 2009 12:00 am
Editors Picks
Whispers Blogby Arkansas Business Staff
- Hutchinson: Arkansas 'Ready to Go' on ACA Repeal But Concerned About Trade Tax
- Live Video: Watch Gov. Asa Hutchinson's Speech to the Legislature
- On MSNBC, Fox Business, Cotton and Hutchinson Talk Health Care Reform
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- Level the Playing Field (Editorial) 1 day ago
- Simmons to Buy Fort Worth Bank in Third Deal Announced Since November 14 hours ago


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Governor Jeb Bush Headlines the Spring Scholarship Banquet
The annual event raised $313,000 for Mississippi College
In his keynote speech at Mississippi College's annual spring scholarship banquet, Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush managed to sound very much like a presidential candidate without tipping his hand as to whether or not he'll seek the Republican nomination in 2016. Mississippi College President Lee Royce was the latest to pose the question at the March 26th banquet, which raised $313,000 for scholarships to Mississippi College.
"It's best to make a decision at the proper time,'' Bush said at a news conference prior to the March 26 banquet.
The younger brother of former President George W. Bush and son of former President George H. Bush, Jeb Bush served as Florida's 43rd governor from 1999 to 2007. In his remarks at the banquet, Bush made a strong pitch for America to strengthen its schools.
"It's obvious that America needs to ramp up its schools at a time when only one-third of the nation's high school graduates are ready for college or careers,'' Bush said. "That's not a definition of a great country.''
Introducing the prominent Republican to the large crowd at Anderson Hall, Mississippi Governor Phil Bryant noted that Bush has benefitted Mississippi by sharing his ideas about charter schools and other education reforms that proved successful in Florida. Many of those concepts now appear in Bryant's "Education Works'' initiatives before the state Legislature.
Governor Bush also touched on immigration, the future of the Republican party, and his famous political family. Earlier in the day, Bush spoke to hundreds of MC students at Self Hall, home of the Mississippi College School of Business.
"All of his points were interesting topics that need to be addressed in a future election,'' said sophomore Megan Kaye Donahoe.
Speaking to the future of the Republican party, Bush said, "I think we need to be more positive, more hopeful, moreoptimistic, more embracing of the diversity of our country, and we need to listen to people and engage. We can't just be against the president's policies, for example. We have to be for things."
Governor Bush is the latest in a lineup of luminaries headlining the annual scholarship banquet. Other speakers in the series have included former U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, magazine executive Steve Forbes, former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee, and former Vice President Bob Dole. Collectively, the scholarship dinners have raised more than $1.6 million to help academically talented students with financial need receive a Mississippi College education.


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As animals on a true free-range farm, the chickens at Heritage Hen Farm are pretty self-reliant in finding their own food. "This is the original sustainable farming, where the chicken feed on the land and have no cages," Svetlana says, pointing out some of the native herbs the chicken love to eat. With more than 30 native herbs on the property that the chickens dine on, their diet is bolstered by bugs and grubs (chickens love grubs!), fruit trees growing around the property, grow boxes Marty has constructed that have various herbs and plant species taking root ("They love sunflowers, picking them clean," he says) and Whole Food's bulk mix, which is filled with legumes, mixed nuts, berries and seeds. It's stored in cans near the main chicken coop, and when the lid is removed, chickens swarm from all over the property, recognizing the sounds of dinnertime.
"The food they eat directly affects the flavor of the eggs, so we try to give them all-natural, organic foodstuff. And as for protein, they eat all the bugs and grubs they can eat. They're always searching for them," says Svetlana, who is adamant on keeping foreign chemicals and poisons out of her farm. "We use no fertilizer, no pesticide, nothing. Everything is organic and natural."
For the most part, "if you let a chicken be a chicken, they'll be fine," she says. The Simons help keep the ratio of hen to rooster in balance, usually about 12-15 hens per rooster. But the rooster pretty much takes it from there. Its job is constant: to find food, look out for predators, maintain a healthy relationship with the hens and reproduce. With more than 200 crows, roosters are always communicating with their harem, and when they find food, the hens always eat their fill first.
When it comes time to rearing chicks, the hens decide when and how many they want to raise, build a nest, preen their feathers to trigger fertilization (eggs need a constant 101 degrees to incubate) and sit on a determined amount of eggs. They communicate with the developing chicks throughout the process, rotating the eggs and lightly clucking.
Even with the hundreds of chickens running "afowl" (I couldn't help myself) at Heritage Hen Farm, the Simons still cannot keep up with demand for their farm-fresh eggs. They limit the sale to the Delray Beach Green Market, an old-timey milk delivery service called Delivery Dudes (Palm Beach, Delray Beach and Boca Raton) and their own farm store, Trés Frésh, which is open from 5-7 p.m. Monday through Friday. But they are still at capacity.
"We have had to ration our eggs," says Svetlana, who aims to educate others on what goes into farming. "People who have never farmed are so far removed from what goes into raising these animals. They do not understand where this stuff is coming from, how it is raised. But when they taste these eggs, they start to understand."
This drives to the crux of what Heritage Hen Farm is all about: a deeper understanding of the environmental advantages behind localism and the health benefits an all-natural diet promotes. What started as a hobby farm and blossomed into a full-time operation, Heritage Hen Farm is returning farming to a simpler, healthier and more local form. It also sends the message that this not only creates a more humane environment for the animals but also is a much healthier way to eat, is easier on the environment and supports the local economy beyond what is seen on just a few acres nestled in Boynton Beach.
In the end, it really all boils down to taste. Just one farm-fresh egg from Heritage Hen Farm will have you changing your shopping habitats and camping out in front of Trés Frésh in search of a multi-colored dozen.
- Heritage Hen Farm's farm store, Trés Frésh, summer hours are Monday through Friday, 5-7 p.m. Along with farm-fresh eggs, other offerings from Marty and Svetlana include fresh raw honey raised from bee hives kept on property, raw milk; raw cream, raw butter, raw feta and raw kefir to make your own yogurt.
8495 S. Haverhill Rd.
Boynton Beach, FL 33436
*Photography by Diana Ramírez


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iHerb Customer Reviews
Savings of: $1.80 (3% off)
didn't know dark chocolates were bitter in taste
Posted by marzoqi on Mar 12, 2015
even though it's not my usual sweet chocolate, I came to love and I was having a problem looking for a way to eat maca, this product really is good for having these two ingredients(dark choco and maca). the only problem I see is the price, it is pricy for a 40g bar, the price would be acceptable if it was a 50g bar. I recommend this product. Edit: I wonder why the price got up again, I thought 48$ was good .
Great flavour
Posted by 4658758440402681522 on Mar 18, 2015
Pretty expensive but they are delicious. The first time i tried these i didn't like them, it took me a while to get used to the maca flavour but once i did i became obsessed! If they were cheaper i would repurchase again in a heartbeat.
Amazing stuff
Posted by 5453264415586134152 on Feb 16, 2013
I love this company and the high quality and sustainability of all of their products. A bite of these maca bars has become a twice daily ritual for me for nearly a year.
Posted by insynergy on Jun 30, 2013
Vega is my all time fave company... love what Brendan is doing for Vegan athletes. These bars are great and make my morning smoothie fab when thrown in to add "choc chips" :). Only downer is the price but have learnt long ago that quality is worth it
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0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
By drying are you referring to freezing it? Also another question i have is say you needed 2oz starter for a formula would you take out 2 oz starter or would you take out 1 oz starter since it should double in size?Thanks for the response.


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Exclusive from Las Vegas; Top stock analyst says the economy is doing better than you thinkWednesday, October 12th, 2011
If you have watched our coverage of the National Business Aviation Association from Las Vegas, you already know we have one item you won't see anywhere else. Morgan Stanley aerospace analyst and Managing Director Heidi Wood was chosen top stock picker on Wall Street three years in a row (2004-2007), and Tom Horne interviewed her in this video about the future of Cessna, Hawker Beechcraft, and the miserable recession, which she says is truly coming to an end. For a lift and a little good news, click here to see a top stock picker at work.


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Tall Leather Grid-Tufted Headboard
- Overview
Reaching new heights. Our Tall Leather Grid-Tufted Headboard gets its shape from geometric detailing rather than traditional buttons, for a tufted look that's comfortable to lean on at any angle. This tall version is a full two rows of tufting higher than the original.
- Solid and engineered wood frame.
- Front of headboard upholstered in soft leather.
- Wood legs are covered.
- Coordinates with most west elm beds (sold separately).
- Use our Bed Builder Tool to match this headboard with a bed frame.
- Imported.
- Select sizes are online/catalog only.
- Details + Dimensions
- Twin: 40"w x 5"d x 56"h.
- Full: 56"w x 5"d x 56"h.
- Queen: 62"w x 5"d x 56"h.
- King: 78"w x 5"d x 56"h.
Assembled upon delivery via White Glove Service. View assembly instructions.
Spot clean with a damp cloth. Hardware may loosen over time. Periodically, check that all connections are tight.
- Shipping + Return Info
Delivery Information
Quick Ship colors and fabrics receive delivery in 1 – 3 weeks.
Items marked with HD are delivered with our In-Home Delivery
• Shipped via standard ground service
• Delivery is by appointment (Mon-Sat) depending on area
• Our delivery service will call to schedule within a 4-hour window
• Item is delivered to your room of choice
• Includes unpacking, assembly and packaging removal
• Available in the 48 contiguous states only
For our guide to measuring for delivery click here
Shipping Rates
The shipping rate varies depending on your order total and shipping options.
Please note, some furniture, rugs and other large items that are bulky or heavy items have a delivery surcharge listed in parentheses ($) after the item price. These delivery surcharges are in addition to the standard delivery shipping charges. View Shipping Rates and Options
Return Policy
We take great pride in the quality of our merchandise. If for any reason you are not happy with your purchase, you may return the item(s) within 30 days of receiving the order for a full refund of the merchandise cost. After 30 days, we will replace or refund your purchase against manufacturer's defects ONLY. Please note that we cannot accept returns on mattresses, monogrammed/personalized items, special order upholstery items and special order rugs, one-of-a-kind rugs, or on items damaged through normal wear and tear. We also cannot accept returns of final-sale items, which are identified by a price ending in .99 or .97. Delivery fees are non-refundable.
For further assistance please call our customer service department at 1.888.922.4119 or send an email to firstname.lastname@example.com


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Chuck kicks up mashed potatoes with a few of their root vegetable cousins.
Kelsey's pan-fried risotto cakes are a nice substitute for mashed potatoes.
Foolproof crispy fries are guaranteed when you follow these simple steps.
Load up some spuds and throw them in the microwave for a hearty side dish.
Debi slathers her Potato and Pepper Stew on crusty bread for a divine meal.
Alton's Cold-Fashioned Potato Salad marries the art and science of cooking.
Aida makes Mexican potato skins, a mouthwatering twist on an old favorite.
Tyler draws on his Southern heritage to make the ultimate potato salad.
Potluck 2.0: Chef Kevin Gillespie reinvents potato salad -- on the grill.
If you love potato salad, try this extra-special recipe from Giada.
Get Cooking Channel on your TV.


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The place to be....for the Characters, Places & Things
on Television
Intro: The
following is a script for the TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE, a TV show pilot, written exclusively for the TV ACRES.com website. Click
here for show summary
The inside of a large red barn. In the middle of the barn is a
desk, a lap top computer, and a bunch of TV collectibles.
Behind the desk is a hat tree filled with different style hats and
a large plasma TV screen hangs from the ceiling. To the left and
right are bleachers and stalls for the members of the TV ACRES
CLUBHOUSE to sit (a Peanut Gallery for the Millennium). To the
rear of the studio is a large barn door that opens onto a bucolic
farm landscape.
[Music/Theme Song]
TV Acres! TV Acres! TV Acres is the place to be. (Sing it again!)
TV Acres! TV Acres! TV Acres is the place to beeeeeeeee.
ANNOUNCER: Live! from a cornfield near the
majestic city of Cleveland, Ohio...it's... the TV ACRES
[Audience applause]
AL: Hi everybody and welcome to the premiere of
our show. I'm Jerome "Alphonse" Holst, your host. But just call me "Al."
[applause subsides]
TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE is a place
where TV fans can meet and greet and share their love for
television. Helping us oversee the festivities is our
clubhouse mascot, the beautiful
TeyVey-A-Tuba, the
digital diva of
channel surfing who
just happens to live in our CLUBHOUSE TV set...All Hail TeyVey-A-Tuba.
AUDIENCE: [chanting] "Tuba! Tuba! Tuba! Tuba!
[Tey-Vey-A-Tuba - waving her hand and blowing
kisses- appears inside a large
plasma screen behind the main CLUBHOUSE desk where Al
sits and conducts the show]
AL: Now simmer down boys and girls and let me continue.
Each month the TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE will recap
the best of what's happened on primetime TV as well as answer emails from
our fans, highlight a Website of the Month, play a few games, and even take a visit
to our "Collectibles Corner to talk about TV memorabilia from our
favorite TV shows.
We'd like to inaugurate the very first meeting of the TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE
by reciting the official TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE oath. Please rise.
[Al and members of the studio audience solemnly stand to
attention. The words of the CLUBHOUSE oath scrolls by at the bottom
of the CLUBHOUSE TV screen for all to read.]
EVERYBODY: We, the members of the TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE, do
solemnly pledge:
To watch as many hours of TV as
they like and to stay up as late as they want.
To forgive those who blaspheme "television" with
derogatory remarks like the Boob Tube, and the Idiot Box.
To boldly hold on to the remote control despite cries of "You're
always hogging it"
And to defend - to the death - a person's right to watch TV in
their underwear.
AL: But NOT in the Clubhouse.
EVERYBODY: [Begrudgingly] But not in the Clubhouse.
AL: So pledge we all.
EVERYBODY: So
pledge we all.
[Al strikes a gavel on the
AL: Alright, the
first monthly meeting of the TV ACRES Clubhouse is now in
session...but first...a word from our sponsor.
[Audience Applause]
[Al sits down at the
CLUBHOUSE desk and reads the ad copy while photographs
from THE ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW appear on the CLUBHOUSE TV screen.
TeyVey-A-Tuba is gone for the moment.]
AL: This portion of our show is sponsored by Wally's Fillin'
Station in Mayberry. North Carolina, Wally's Fillin' station is a
full service establishment. When you pull into Wally's he'll check the air pressure in your tires,
open the hood and
check your oil and other critical fluid levels, wash you
windshield - front and back - and fill up your gas tank with only
the best premium gasoline on the market. And he will do all of
this with a smile. When Wally's out fishing at Myers Lake, you
will get the same excellent service from his assistants Gomer Pyle
and his cousin, Goober Pyle. So, the next time you're in North
Carolina, y'all drop by Mayberry and chew the fat with Wally,
Gomer, and Goober. And while you're at the filling station grab
yourself a Nectarine Crush or Huckleberry Smash soda pop. As town
barber Floyd Lawson is fond of saying, "Ewwwww! they've got the
best pop in town." That's Wally's Fillin' Station in Mayberry,
North Carolina. One of the many proud sponsors of the TV ACRES
[Back to the program]
AL: Onward and Upward! Each month at this time we'll take the
opportunity to answer some of the questions that arrived via email
to our tvacres.com website. We do this with the help of our
Clubhouse Mascot, the beautiful TeyVey-A-Tuba,
the mystical goddess of Channel Surfing who lives inside our
CLUBHOUSE TV set.
[Tey-Vey-A-Tuba appears on the CLUBHOUSE TV
Screen and waves at the audience members who whistle and applaud.
Tuba will read the emails. Al will answer them]
AUDIENCE: [Chanting] Tuba! Tuba! Tuba!
TUBA: Thanks everybody, Nice to be here. I'm so excited. OK Al, here goes.
swirls her hand in the air as a jumble of floating letters form
the message for the first email which she reads to the audience]
TUBA: Our first email is from Phillip
Mahoney from Toledo, Ohio
who writes:
"I noticed that the dog on the detective drama VERONICA MARS looks different from the
earlier episode, What's up with that?
TUBA: Yeah, Al, What up with that?
AL: Well, Tuba here's the
The dog in question
is called "Backup." Backup is the pet of Veronica Mars
(played by Kristin Bell), a slender, blonde 17-year-old
and part time private eye who attends Neptune High School in
Southern California.
Now, the original Backup (referred to
as 1.0 and seen in the pilot and early episodes) was a white and
brown 2.5 year American bulldog named Gordo trained by Omar von
Muller of All Stars Kennel.
[Tuba splits
the screen to insert a photograph
of Backup No.1]
Unfortunately, the first Backup
was replaced when he didn't live up to the expectation of the
show's creator, Rob Thomas. The replacement Backup was
called Lefty.
[Tuba shows a photograph of Backup No.2]
He made his first appearance in
episode No. 4 "The Wrath of Con" as Veronica, her father, Keith
Mars and Backup the dog visit the campus of San Diego State while
on a case. Lefty's movie credits include the film Alpha Dog
FYI, there is also a Backup 1.5. This is the name given to the stuffed
brown toy dog found in Veronica Mars' bedroom.
Oh they're so cute. But why was the dog called Backup?
AL: Because
her pit bull always backed her up in case of danger.
TUBA: OHHHH. Neat.
AL: So what else do we have in the
email Grabbag, Tuba?
TUBA: Our next email comes from Janice Blakely from Sacramento,
California who writes "Everyone says that my baby boy looks just
like the Gerber Baby. How can my baby be a Gerber Baby?"
AL: This is a popular question at the TV
ACRES website. The answer is found at the www.gerber.com in the
Contact Us - FAQs section under "General Inquiries". Here is what
Gerber has to say:
"All of the babies in our ads are registered, professional
models. The first step to get your baby into our ads would be to
register with a local modeling agency. Be sure to let them know
you are interested in modeling for Gerber."
"All of the babies in our ads are registered, professional
models. The first step to get your baby into our ads would be to
register with a local modeling agency. Be sure to let them know
you are interested in modeling for Gerber."
TUBA: I love it when the Gerber commercials runs on TV.
Don't you, Al?
AL: I prefer Budweiser commercials, myself. So what other
emails do we have?
TUBA: Our last email is from Fred Farkle from Indianapolis,
IN who writes: "Dear Al, I heard you speak about your Clubhouse Mascot, the
beautiful, the desirable, the most excellent honey TeyVey-A-Tuba,
the mystical Goddess of Channel Surfing. Could you tell us more
about her?
AL: Why sure...Hey! what a minute, this is our first show.
How did Mr. Farkle know about you.
TUBA: [Tuba sports a sheepish look on
her face then says] "Oh just answer the question, Al. I can't
wait to hear what you think of me."
AL: Ok I'll play along. Hmmm, now how can I describe a
Goddess and do justice to her.
Well, First of all, TeyVey-A-Tuba (or Tuba" as we like to call
her) rules over the digital pathways that deliver TV signals
everywhere on earth. It's a big job but with the
help of an army of elf-like wranglers called "zappers" who make
sure that the TV signals keep "rollin" to their proper destinations, TV viewers everywhere can
flawlessly switch from one channel to the next to obtain their
favorite TV shows. Helping her in this endeavor is her Chief
Zapper "Clyde".
TUBA: "Hey, Clyde! [Tuba waves excitedly]
AL: When Tuba's not controlling the
transmission, the horizontal and the vertical, she
hangs out at the CLUBHOUSE. And most of the time, she's fun to be
around. But to be honest, on occasion, Tuba can have a bit of a
temper. Like the time she blacked out Super Bowl Sunday at my
house, because I forgot her birthday.
TUBA: It's True. And Al hasn't forgotten my Birthday
AL: So, true. [Applause]
So, to summarize, as THE ADDAMS FAMILY theme songs
proclaims our beautiful Tuba is "neat, sweet, and
petite." Or as the Rice-A-Roni jingle goes Tuba is certainly
a "San Francisco Treat."
Well, Mr. Fred Farkle of
Indianapolis, IN, [Al stares up at Tuba] I hope you're happy with
the way I answered your email request.
TUBA: Zowie, I sure am. I mean, I'm sure Mr. Farkel
is. Thanks, Al.
AL: Ladies and Gentlemen, the beautiful TeyVey-A-Tuba.
She'll be back later in the program to help us recap the News of
the Month.
TUBA: See you later [Tuba blows a kiss to the studio
audience as her image slowly
fades from the CLUBHOUSE screen]
AL: If you'd like to ask TV ACRES a question, then don't forget to send YOUR questions about TV to
Maybe we'll pick yours to answer on next month's program.
Up next...our WEBSITE OF THE MONTH.
[Al spins around three times in his chair, then quickly stops,
grabs a graduation cap from the hat tree next to his desk, plops
it on his head and
fiddles with the tassel]
AL: Welcome to WEBSITE OF THE MONTH, an educational
segment where we like to spotlight a fun, wacky, or weird website
for the members of the Clubhouse. And this month's website is
surely on the weird side or at least "Cutting edge."
Straight from "Quirky Files" this month's website [drum roll]
"Circumcisions on Television"
[Al rolls his chair over to a laptop computer
on his desk, types on the keyboard and pulls up an image of the
website on the CLUBHOUSE TV Screen.]
AL: Yes that's right, the website entitled "Treatment of
Circumcisions on TV" documents occurrences of circumcision
on TV sitcoms and game and talk shows.
Now the first thing I thought when I found this
website was "Wow, what an interesting topic to collect." You know
some people collect stamps, some coins and some comic books, but
Hey! then there are those out there who go for the gusto. Can you
imagine this guy at school during show and tell.
[A thought bubble appears over Al's head.
Inside we see a school room. A teacher speaks]
TEACHER: Now our next student has a most unusual hobby,
children. Let's all move in close and take a
good look at some of his photographs. [Suddenly, kids scream in
horror. The thought bubble bursts]
AL: Anyway, the website is maintained by a guy named Hugh
(no last name available). He points out that circumcision is not only
practiced by the Jews and that not all male Jews are circumcised.
When available, the webmaster provides full excerpts from the
show's scripts to illustrate the topic of circumcision in the
episode. For example, in a pre-Bar Mitzvah interview on THE
SIMPSONS, a reporter asked if Krusty the Clown was circumcised and
he replies, "Yeah, and then some."
These examples of circumcision on TV are part of larger website
that deals with the "The struggle for genital integrity and
struggle against the involuntary genital modification of children of any
sex: Circumcision, Female Genital Mutilation, and Involuntary Sex
So did you like our choice of WEBSITE OF THE MONTH?
[Audience boos and
If you'd like to recommend a Website of the Month, drop up a line. Just
go to our website at www.tvacres.com and click on our email link.
Coming up, our regular feature segment
"Collectible Corner", where we look at TV memorabilia
from our favorite TV shows, but first
let's do a segment...
[Al fiddles with the tassel on his graduation
cap then jerks it off his head tosses it onto the floor.]
...a segment called "Question of the Month"
where we at TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE ask viewers of
our program a question, so we can share their opinion on our next
program. So to kick off our "Question of the Month" we are going to
choose the topic of TIME TRAVEL.
You know, over the years, there have been many cool shows about
time travel. DOCTOR WHO, TIMECOP, TIME TUNNEL. BILL AND TED'S
EXCELLENT ADVENTURES and SEVEN DAYS. Of course, in each of these
shows, the characters had the chance to travel through time and
space, meet famous people, battle villains and maybe if they were
lucky, alter the course of history itself. So our question to our
fans is "If you could time travel. Where and When would you go and
Why?" Interesting question. So, think about it and then send us
your thoughts so we can use them on our next program. Send
you answer/response to
AUDIENCE MEMBER: [yelling] TIME TRAVEL! I'll
tell you what I'd do if I could travel back in time.
AL: Ah! a voice from the wilderness. [Al heads into
the audience with a microphone in hand] So, sir, sounds like you got something to get off your chest, so
fire away. First, what's your name?
AUDIENCE MEMBER: My name is Delvert P.
Stickybottom, from Frickertville, Ohio.
AL: What a quaint name...for a town. So, Delvert,
if you could travel back in time, where would you go and who would
you do? Ahem, Let me correct that..."What" would you do?
DELVERT: Well, Al. Some folks might want to go
back and shot that darn Hitler fellow or zap back in time to Jerusalem to
see that prophet Jesus, but Al, if I could travel back in time,
I'd go back in time and warn the crew
of the SS Minnow not to go on that three hour tour.
AL: Ah yes, the three hour tour. But why Gilligan's
DELVERT: Well, you see, I feel sorry for
Gilligan always getting hit in the head with the Skipper's Hat
show after show, year after year. He can't help it that he's such a
foul up. But most of all I can't stand the idea of healthy
American boy stranded on an island with a couple of attractive
women and not even get to first base with them. The show's
supposed to be a comedy, but damn it's a tragedy when I see that
Ginger and Mary Ann strutting their stuff and not getting any
action. It drives me crazy. I admit it's a bit of a peccadillo with
me, but that's how I feel.
AL. Well, you've certainly put a lot of thought
into this issue.
DELVERT: Well, down on the farm, you get a lot
of time in between milking the cow and plowing the fields
to philosophize on life's mysteries, so to speak.
AL: Well, Delvert, I am really happy you shared
your thoughts with the members of the CLUBHOUSE - no matter how far
out they may seem to some of us.
DELVERT: Thank you, Al. Nice talking to you,
AL: [pointing at Delvert] Ladies and
Gentlemen...Delvert P. Stickybottom from Frickertville, Ohio. Give him a
hand. And don't forget to send up your thoughts on time travel by
email to
Coming up, a visit to "Collectible Corner." But first another
word from our sponsors.
[Al runs back to the desk and reads the ad copy while photographs from the SIMON AND
SIMON TV Show appear on the CLUBHOUSE TV Screen]
AL: This portion of the program is sponsored by Simon and Simon
detective agency. Located at 3461 La Costa Road in San Diego, CA.
Simon brothers, Rick and A.J. offer their clients reasonable
rates, courteous service and confidential investigations. Rick
Simon, the older brother and a Vietnam veteran, is a streetwise P.I. with a rough and tumble attitude. A. J. Simon is a lawyer and
uses brain over brawn to investigate the clues. Although their
styles are different, together the Simon Brothers make a formidable
team that guarantees results. So when you need a detective agency
with diverse skills, and the tenacity to finish what they start,
choose Simon and Simon Investigators "They're More than brothers,
they're best friends." That's Simon and Simon Investigators,
another proud sponsor of the TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE.
[Back to the program]
[Strange fog horn sounds. Al
turns his head abruptly]
AL: What's that I hear? It must be time for
my favorite segment "Collectible Corner."
As you can see, our TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE is filled with all sorts of
TV related memorabilia and collectibles. Up in the rafters we have
a model of the starship USS Enterprise from the sci-fi series STAR
TREK. On the wall hangs a replica of the Winchester used in the
1950s western series THE RIFLEMAN. And on my desk where I create
my monthly program are various toys like a Superman Pez dispenser,
a windup Spongebob Squarepants, a marionette of Howdy Doody and a
Pee Wee Herman pull string doll that says stuff like "I know you
are but what am I?
Well, this week I'd like to show you the latest TV Prop to be added
to our
collection. A telephone. But not just any telephone, You see I
found the phone at a local flea market where the woman selling the
phone told me it was the actual phone used on an episode of THE
TWILIGHT ZONE. The episode where a little boy kept talking to his
grandmother. What's so strange about a little boy talking to his
grandmother? Well, nothing, except, in this case, his grandmother
had been dead for a week. As the boisterous Joan Ann Worley from LAUGH-IN might
say, "SPOOOOKY!"
Well, I had my doubts about the
phone but I paid the price and set in on my
desk here in the CLUBHOUSE. Well. a few days ago, the phone began
to ring. That's right. Phone calls from the beyond - mainly from heaven
but some from that other place down below. So don't be surprised if during
the broadcast the phone starts to ring and [RING! RING!] Speak of
the devil. Well let's check out who or what is on the other end.
AL: Hello TV ACRES CLUBHOUSE. Al Speaking. Whom may I say is calling?
Excuse me, could you speak a little louder? I can't hear you over
all of the wailing and gnashing of teeth.
What's that? It's PUSSY?
[Al looks at the audience]
Apparently, we have a kitty cat on the line.
Oh, I see, Not Pussy, BIG PUSSY. Uh Huh, Oh Big Pussy from THE
SOPRANOS. You were whacked a few seasons ago. I remember now.
Well how are your doing. Uh Huh, I see. Beaten daily with fiery
whips and forced to drink molten lava three time a days.
Well, sorry I asked. That doesn't sound like too much fun.
So Big Pussy, what can I do for you?
Uh Huh, I see,
You're hankering for some good Italian food.
Uh Huh. Spaghetti. Meatballs. Cannoli. Pasta fasul. Oh yeah, I hear ya. You got my mouth watering.
Well, Pussy, I don't know what I can do to help.
What's that? Uh huh, DOMINOS refused to
deliver. Well, I can understand their position and you can forget
that 30 minute or less guarantee. I don't think they deliver to
other dimensions.
What's that?
HIGHWAY TO HEAVEN? Oh, I see, the "Highway to Heaven" guy.
Do *I* know him?
Yes, as a matter of fact, I just talked to him a few days ago on
this very telephone. Uh huh, So you want me to see if he can put a good
word in to his boss the "Big Guy Upstairs" and see if they'll cut
you a break and get some decent food delivered down there.
Well, I can image, it is Hell and the food must be awful. I've
been to Denny's so I can sympathize.
Well, let me see what I can do. I can't promise you anything but
I'll pass the message along.
Say Pussy. You don't mind I call you, Pussy? Good.
Now that you've had a chance to work with Tony Soprano and the
DEVIL Who do you prefer?
You don't want to say, Uh-huh. You
don't want get into any trouble badmouthing Tony. Uh-huh. Because when Tony gets down
there - and that's a given - you don't want to
have to worry about him having your ass for breakfast...literally.
No, I understand completely.
What's that? You've got to go. It's your turn to ritually mutilate a lawyer. Well,
by all means, I don't want to interrupt your important work. I'll
let you go. Bye!
[Al hangs up the phone]
Ladies and Gentlemen, Big Pussy from THE SOPRANOS. Dead, but not
[audience applause]
[Al leaves his desk and runs in front of the audience]
AL: Now, let's get ready to play...
Continued on Next Page >
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