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By Erin Bruehl, USTA.com
Same event. Same opponent. Same round. New location.
For the second consecutive year, the U.S. Fed Cup team will face defending champion Italy in the first round of the annual Fed Cup competition, but in 2014 it will be in a new venue.
Cleveland was selected to host the 2014 Fed Cup by BNP Paribas First Round between the U.S. and Italy, with the tie being held at the Public Auditorium, Feb. 8-9. This will be the first time Ohio has ever hosted Fed Cup, though the state hosted 10 Davis Cup ties between 1960 and 1979. The Public Auditorium is no stranger to tennis competition, either, having hosted the 1973 Davis Cup Final, where the U.S. lost to Australia.
U.S. Fed Cup Captain Mary Joe Fernandez and her family currently reside in Cleveland, and she said she could not be happier to see the competition come to town as the U.S. looks to win a record 18th Fed Cup title – and first since 2000.
"I am thrilled that Fed Cup is headed to Cleveland for the first time," said Fernandez. "Italy is a tough team with a strong record in Fed Cup, and playing them is always challenging and exciting for us. Living in Cleveland, I am happy that Ohio will get to see some high-quality tennis, and I expect tennis fans to fill the stands to cheer on Team USA."
"The City of Cleveland is proud to host the 2014 Fed Cup between the U.S. and Italy," said Mayor Frank G. Jackson. "Cleveland has a rich history of hosting sporting events of this caliber and we are certain that the USTA, the athletes and spectators will have an outstanding experience at the event and around our great city."
Italy, which has won four Fed Cup championships since 2006, recently defeated Russia, 4-0, in the 2013 finale. The Italians defeated the Americans, 3-2, in the 2013 first round in Rimini, Italy, and topped 2011-12 champion Czech Republic in the semifinals.
After falling to Italy in the opening round, the U.S. – behind wins from Serena and Venus Williams – defeated Sweden in a World Group Play-off in Delray Beach, Fla., to retain its status in the prestigious World Group for 2014. Overall, the U.S. is 37-4 all-time in Fed Cup ties at home.
Overall, the U.S. leads its matchup with Italy, 9-3, but the Italians have won the last three meetings, including the 2009 and 2010 Fed Cup finals. Players for this tie will be named no later than 10 days prior to the start of the competition.
Tickets for the best-of-five match series will go on sale Dec. 6 with a USTA Member presale beginning Dec. 4.
Copyright 2017 by United States Tennis Association. All Rights Reserved.
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Silver Springs is a 2nd generation campground nestled in 170 acres of beautiful countryside. We have 300 sites and offer many amenities for the entire family to enjoy.
Wisconsin Accommodation: Campgrounds/RV Parks Located on the Eagle River Chain Of Lakes
Lake Joy is a family owned & managed campground that provides a clean, relaxing, friendly environment for family & friends to enjoy together. We are proud of our private, spring fed lake which has swimming, boating & some of the best fishing in SW WI
A Quiet Place w/lots of space. 199sites. Spacious grassed sites. Shaded sites w/gravel pads,Indoor Heated Pool, on the Rock River w/Fishing Pier and Pond, Game Room, Flush Toilets, Coin Showers, Hiking Trails, Wildlife. City Sewer/Water/Elect.
Indian Trails is a family campground providing a clean, fun environment to create family memories to last a lifetime. Enjoy the indoor pool, Canoe & Kayak River trips, Adventure 18 Hole Mini Golf, 15 acre Fishing Lake, and Hiking Trails. 333 Sites
The only campground in Wisconsin Dells with a waterpark included FREE with your stay! Yogi Bear Water Playground with 25 interactive water activities & four waterslides. Activity pool with 25' Waterslide, Water Basketball, & Hot Tub.
A magical camping retreat on 188 beautifuly wooded acres just 5 miles from the heart of Wisconsin Dells and all of its amusement parks and shopping. Spacious RV & tent sites and rental units., each with a picnic table and fire ring.
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Wisconsin Accommodation: Campgrounds/RV Parks
Jellystone Park of Fort Atkinson is a highly rated, award winning family campground and resort located in southern Wisconsin. With 569 sites and 13 cabins distributed over 80 acres, we are sure to accommodate your family for a weekend of fun.
Find a campground or rv park in Wisconsin for your wilderness retreat and weekend getaway. Enjoy the outdoors and pitch a tent at one of our campsites, or park your motorhome at one of our RV parks in key>. Camping is great for family vacations, traveling on a budget, and getting back in touch with nature. Browse our campgrounds and plan your Wisconsin camping trip today!

subset: commoncrawl


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General Forms
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PARTICIPANTS: Complete the following forms
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COACHES: Complete the following forms
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If needed, the Student-Athlete may visit the Athletic Training Room for treatment (Mon-Fri 12-4 p.m.), on the following conditions:
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Well said, much better than how I put it. ^ BTW with golden week coming up your prediction of a break will finally come true lol.
I still have a feeling that oda might pull a surprise contestant out of his ass, maybe. I am very excited for this next chapter. I expect bellamy, and bartolomeo to kick ass, and maybe a surprise guy as well. (!GIN!)


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Kylie Jenner Goes Makeup Free During a Day Out With Tyga
- 11:40 AM, Feb 20
Austin Mahone Interview and Performance on Much Music's NEW.MUSIC.LIVE.
Photo credit: Dominic Chan / WENN
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Sooooooooooooo, I haven't been active in a while.
May I just say that the previous chapter's ending was awesome!
It's definitely one of the most badass poses Luffy has been drawn, ever!
And now, Law shows his true power!
I love this manga. :)
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Sooooooooooooo, I haven't been active in a while.
May I just say that the previous chapter's ending was awesome!
It's definitely one of the most badass poses Luffy has been drawn, ever!
And now, Law shows his true power!
I love this manga. :)
I wasn't arguing against Luffy's strength, but acknowledging that he is physically stronger than Law. Law simply has the tactical advantage of manipulating his surroundings.
See my explanation to xioaxioa for supposedly proving me wrong and your black-less haki punch.
By dismantled I meant Monet was cut in half by Zoro, Vergo was cut in half by Law, and my third reference was Caesar being pummeled by Luffy, though not finished yet.
Forget sandtrap/ Honeytrap, Monet is the ultimate snow trap. Main point being, Once she did that encasing him in layers of "snow forts" thing already, more than likely most fighters would lose to her at that point.
Nah, my fault. Although she's definitely strong in a sense, (see it more like Smoker's strength, or like the ocean's strength), And she received orders I believe, directly from Joker, think it's like some mental lapse to always see her as either lackey of CC, or Law's future crewmate. Brain was just confused when mentioning Joker's 3 associates.Quote:
By dismantled I meant Monet was cut in half by Zoro, Vergo was cut in half by Law, and my third reference was Caesar being pummeled by Luffy, though not finished yet.
I wasn't arguing against Luffy's strength, but acknowledging that he is physically stronger than Law. Law simply has the tactical advantage of manipulating his surroundings.
(Should probably read this + below as somewhat combined responses to both questions. Realized I might've used the '/' a little bit too much in this post. For future reference, and this post Mostly use it to mean similar or the same meaning words or terms, that I put into as well in case slightly different wording might help some1 understand my point. I tend to especially use it when the point might be a little more complicated, which is why I used it here. )
I understood. My point was explaining that Luffy's physical strength is a bit more intertwined with his haki and his body then might be considered before. When I say his body(I mentioned it a bit better probably in my post for Gear 4th), I mean technically Luffy's rubber body gives him the advantage over pretty much 95% of the OPU, as a starting point, not to mention the crazy upbringing from his Gramps. I'll explain. Unlike metal/ steel / or diamond, or even zoans, Rubber, as per the many methods mentioned(in many discussions including primarily the Gear 4th discussion), Rubber especially 'Oda's rubber' seems possible of (what's the best term) "conditioning itself" thru Luffy's force of will(not technically haki, literally force of will); besides as a starting point rubber is already far beyond even the toughest 'human skin, and body' you can find even in the OPU. (Know some1 might mention diamond/ steel/ seastone / or other metals, but they are more about being impenetrable in the first place. Rubber can be easily pierced but it's still a 'tough material' that Oda 's has made to constantly "refine/ purify/ enhance/ toughen itself without outside elements like the other elements mentioned above.)
Add to that his improved Gear 2nd, haki CoA that we haven't even seen the uppermost limits of(but know that it helped him actually struggle thru a battle mostly underwater, something so far he's been the 1st and only df-user shown to do this so far), and the fact that unlike with Law's 'teleportation, Luffy's speed equals added mass/ power/ in other words improving his strength/ effectiveness/ power/ results of his strikes before and or after adding haki will substantially improve now. Even using BB's comment in ID as a reference( when while still not knowing pretty much anything about haki, BB said Luffy's haki had substantially/ marginally/ largely grown/ w.e. word/ term he used denoting not just a slim improvement) and we see that from Luffy not knowing haki, the only thing that he could have improved was his own physical strength, and or become more certain/ confident- thus improving will/ haki?
Main point to get from that last half is that haki maybe once awakened, is more interconnected/ tied into physical strength growth, experience growth/ toughness growth/ energy/ endurance growth then can be predicted. And Luffy's Physical strength, which so far the fact that we've been given no actual indication of Law, Kidd, or Apoo's physical strength, even after seeing them fight( with Law it's been about 3 times or 'fights') just leans more towards, there being more than just a slight physical strength differential between Luffy and the rest of those I mentioned. Basically to connect these 2 thoughts; If haki and physical strength are so strongly tied together, or even just more like borderline tied together, (Of the supernovas not including Urogue) Luffy probably the physical strength leader, who also quite decently trained his haki as well, and was improving his haki somehow before knowing he had it, might have a bigger edge, just 2 years ago and possibly even more so now in the ' tough enough haki' category.
Think you're seeing it more as previous Gear 2nd. There have been marked improvements in it's speed as denoted from CC's explosive, burning attacks mostly at all encompassing point blank range without any warning, attacks being dodged without any problem by a Luffy not trying his hardest.( some attacks from the equivalent of CC's minor teleportation- like speed ability, which more than likely the Pre-TS Luffy would not have been able to dodge, thus my point.) Then add CoO and I give Luffy the edge in terms of speed. Also with us not knowing the limits of his CoC, could be possible to read mind, thus his opponents (Law's in this instance) next position and Law's plan of attack ahead of time, giving a killer edge still reasonably above Law.Quote:
How so? Law has teleportation damn you (though Luffy does have Gear 2). I'll say that they would be even if anything.
I really think people from this chapter alone, has mistakenly theorized that after conquering Vergo's haki, it would take admiral level to match and stop Law's ability from cutting people. What has been explained I think by arisart is more than likely either way;
1. Joker either underestimated the entire generations haki in comparisons to what they could achieve within 2 years,
2. in comparison to what Vergo's haki was, or
3. Law took a reasonable shortcut in focusing everything on a single line enhancing the cutting ability of the sword while Vergo went broad with utilizing his haki however impressive, but ironically making the exact same mistake he accused Smoker of making.
The point of all this being either any of these by themselves or a couple are true:
1 Law's stronger than Joker estimated,2 Law's stronger in comparison to Vergo than Joker estimated,3 Vergo's haki is weaker than Joker anticipated after doing nothing,4 Vergo's haki has less of an edge over Law than Joker thought, or 5 Law pursued a more tactical solution to overcome the possibly very superior haki. Leading to the point that None of these prohibit Luffy from being equally or more underestimated, nor does it prohibit Luffy from stopping/ catching with properly haki coated ligaments/ deflecting/ redirecting/parrying/ or just plain dodging/ evading Law's sword strikes, unlike what Vergo did.
Pretty sure it was you, or maybe Zero in that 100 + comments forum discussion about 10 weeks ago(counting breaks, not necessarily numbering. 1st time I remember it being mentioned), although think you just mentioned a combination attack, I took it a bit farther to be a combined form because in the most ironic form this would weaken Shinokuni the right amount for people to believably survive.Quote:
Ok first, I also mentioned Shinokune having easy access to the lab now, but like you said it was cut and I am wondering what degree that will have; is PH going to come crashing back down, or is Law going to leave it like this. He did say a few chapters back that he was going to make the lab unsafe, and if the underground corridor of Room 66 is the only safe place, maybe he intended to destroy PH afterall. (Also, I don't believe I was the one who mentioned the Caesar/Shinokuni mutation, though I appreciate the attempt at crediting me.)
Screw you, I'm not reading all of that. I'll just skim it. Instead, this lil bit: Counting Luffy's future victory over CC, The arc's big bads have all been defeated by Supernova's only.
In the opening to Gigant battle 2 it showed Law using his room as a sort of force field against Magellan's poison. While it is completely non cannon, maybe Law can use that to keep the gas out now that he cut the building in half. Personally, I doubt it, Law probably only cut the C section in half, so as long as he continues to the R section he should be fine. But still, I couldn't resist bringing it up (and really, he probably cut in half more then just C).
So, xioaxioa, who's going to take out Buffalo and Baby 5 then? Supernovas again or possibly involve a tandom of Sanji and Zoro? Or are they simply going to gather the pieces of their comrades and head back to Dressrosa?
Personally I think that Baby 5 and Buffalo might not get there in time and both the straw hats and Law would have left. Then the'll just collect Vergo and Monet (Caesar will have been taken by Law) and get back to Dressrosa. Then when we get to the Dofla arc Sanji can battle Vergo again (Monet, no idea).
Aggeroff, the idea of Buffalo and Baby 5 is possible, but if Shinokuni is going to cover the entire island, exactly how do they plan on actually stepping foot on the island let alone picking up Monet and Vergo who, unless someone saves them, are likely to be petrified by the time their cohorts arrive. Thus, I believe that Buffalo and Baby 5 have to arrive prior to the crew and associates leaving PH.


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Publications Tagged: land warfare
- Added March 01, 1995
- The Army in the Information Age. Authored by General Gordon R. Sullivan, Lieutenant Colonel Anthony M. Coroalles.
- They provide insights into three critical areas: the operational environment; the emergence of simultaneity as a unifying concept in Information Age warfare; and, changes that must take place in the planning environment. The authors suggest that the challenge today is to determine what array of capabilities may be needed to perform a broader range of requirements.


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Psalm 142
David prays for preservation from his persecutors.
1 I cried unto the Lord with my voice; with my voice unto the Lord did I make my supplication.
2 I poured out my complaint before him; I shewed before him my trouble.
3 When my spirit was
4 I looked on my right hand, and beheld, but there was no man that would know me: refuge failed me; no man
5 I cried unto thee, O Lord: I said, Thou art my refuge and my portion in the land of the living.
6 Attend unto my cry; for I am brought very low: deliver me from my persecutors; for they are stronger than I.
7 Bring my


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A short list:
- Civil War reenacting
- Doomsday prepping
- Hackerspace membership
- Treehouses
- Owls
- Mushrooming
- Model trains
in which I try to say something true
A short list:
Each year when I sign my tax returns, I remind myself that I am signing a Declaration of Interdependence. That's what taxes are: an acknowledgment that we live together and are responsible to share the costs of living in a civil, clean, efficient, and overwhelmingly safe society. We are dependent and interdependent on one another, no matter how much we might wish it to be different.
Yesterday's bombings at the Boston Marathon are a stark reminder of the precariousness of our own security and the randomness with which tragedy can strike. We can never know when or how we might need the help of our neighbors, whether it's a student loan to go to college, an unemployment check to help stave off poverty after a layoff, an EMT to apply a tourniquet to a leg, or an FBI to track down the bastard(s) that bombed a marathon.
So, to everyone who pays taxes (and everyone pays taxes), thank you.
I am here to announce that after 34 years, I have created the most perfect weekday breakfast. It is easy to prepare and pack to the office and delicious: Trader Joe's gluten-free granola with yogurt and a banana and three slices of bacon prepared over the weekend using the Bacon Method.
You're welcome.
Everyone knows that each American gets one exclamation point to use at the beginning of each year. These exclamation points carry over, so if you are an especially droll person, you might enter middle age with twenty-five or thirty in the bank. Most people find a need to use their yearly allotment each year.
What is less well known is that certain classes of people get special dispensation to use more than one exclamation point each year. This includes Spanish-speakers (they get an extra to invert and place at the beginning of their one exclaimed sentence each year), LOLCAT creators, people with Tourette's, and cake decorators.
Man, I needed this.
So, it occurs to me that some people on this planet may not yet know about my legendary nephew, Gunther.
The McCarters are having a huge yard sale this Saturday. Our church is letting us use their gym, so it will be rain or shine from 8-2 on Saturday, September 8 at 2005 Douglass Boulevard in the Douglass Loop area of the Highlands in Louisville.
At the sale, you can find:
Here's some photos of some of the things that will be for sale. Please join us Saturday morning!
Lucy passed away this weekend. We found out she had inoperable cancer in July. We had one month to spoil her. She spoiled us for nine years.
I adopted Lucy from the Lexington Humane Society. If you like this essay or if you loved Lucy (or both), please consider donating a small amount to the Lexington Humane Society so that they can help other people find epic dogs like mine.
If you don't want to read 10,000 words about my dog, check out this video and slideshow. To the extent they do not say enough, that's what the essay's for.
Lucy wasn't eating.
She stood over her full bowl, turned her head, and looked at me over her shoulder. She wagged her tail.
She hadn't eaten in more than twenty-four hours. This was not like Lucy. Since I brought her home from the pound in July of 2003, Lucy's gastronomic adventures have become some of the most often and most fondly recounted McCarter family legends.
A fifty-pound, border collie mix, Lucy is black with a spot of white fur on her chest. Her feet and nose are brindled and the hair around her ears is crimped. I took her to the Woodland Park dog swim in Lexington during law school and 75% of all of the dogs were some version of black, collie-mix mutt. Lucy is an American classic. She is also just the right size and has just the right disposition to stand on her hind legs and grab food off an unattended countertop.
She has helped herself on at least two occasions to trays of cooling brownies. Chocolate can kill dogs, but it never phased Lucy. You might think that having delicious brownies stolen and your dog's health potentially compromised by chocolate exposure would inspire a vigilant and rigorous habit of not leaving food on the countertop. You would be wrong. It took us years to get this right. Now, though, our countertops are completely devoid of any food. Not because we are clean people, but because nothing is safe from Lucy when it is on a countertop.
Not long after we got Lucy, we returned home to find a half-eaten jar of chunky peanut butter on the kitchen floor. It was about the only thing Lucy has ever half-eaten in her life.
It was a forty ounce plastic jar of Jif—the big boy. Lucy had chewed the red plastic lid off of the top. After gaining access to the jar by brute resolve, Lucy was now presented with a delicious engineering problem: the jar was just wide enough to allow her to fit her snout into the jar, but only so much. So, while we were away Lucy licked deeper and deeper into the peanut butter. She licked until her snout could not fit any tighter into the jar and her tongue could not extend any deeper. A domed, crusted wall of peanut chunks remained; the dome perfectly described the limits of my dog's tongue. I wish I had taken a picture. No artifact would more perfectly capture Lucy's maniacal dedication to a goal.
When we first got Lucy, we did not own a trash can with a lid. Two days later, we did. Occasionally, she would still manage to nibble a piece of the plastic bag enough to tip the can over while we were gone. Those were good days for her.
She once ate a tub of butter. Her stomach was tight and she needed to lie down, but I could tell she considered the effort worth some temporary discomfort.
She also tried to eat a quesadilla maker. She chipped away at the hard plastic to reach the hardened cheese that had dripped into the machine's inaccessible crevices. We returned from running errands and found a completely clean and completely destroyed appliance in the kitchen floor.
Lucy ate my sister's wedding cake. Not before the wedding, thank God, but a year later. My mom had placed the frozen leftovers that couples are supposed to eat on their one-year anniversary on the stove to thaw. While we were away, Lucy nosed her way into the foil-wrapped cake and licked her way through the layers of cake and icing. Instead of grabbing the cake and devouring it on the floor, she left the foil shell intact and on the countertop.
When we returned, I let Lucy out into my parents' backyard. She wandered around a bit and then threw up a massive volume of white vomit. We didn't discover why she was so sick until a few minutes later when my Mom picked up the cake on the stove. It now weighed precisely the weight of the foil that had wrapped the cake my dog was now licking in the yard.
* * *
That my vomit-licking dog was not eating the cup of dried dog food in front of her was a problem. Erin and I began researching "loss of appetite in dogs" online and became concerned that Lucy had a twisted stomach. Surely, the only thing that would keep Lucy from eating was being physically incapable of eating. So, on July 17, 2012 I took her to our vet on my way to the office. I had a mediation beginning at 9:00 a.m. I dropped Lucy off when the clinic opened at 7:30. At 8:15, my vet called me. I took notes:
"mass effect where the liver and spleen normally sit"
"tumor that's growing"
"free fluid and blood in abdomen"
"hemangio sarcoma"
I'm sorry, doctor: can you spell that?
"blood-born tumors"
"she had an acute bleed sometime in the past; why her stomach is tight"
"irregularity to the tumor; can't take one lobe of the liver out"
"this is not good for her; very generalized; not anything that can be done surgically"
My dog is going to die. Soon.
I'm sure vets have a lot of practice talking with grown men who are sobbing on the other end of the phone. Dr. McCoy was very patient.
She explained that she was going to do a red blood cell count test and repeat it in a few hours to determine whether Lucy was currently suffering from an acute bleed or whether she was stable enough to take home. The way I understand it, hemangio sarcomas cause bleeds. If Lucy was still losing a lot of blood into her abdomen, she would need to be put down.
* * *
I have learned a lot about myself during the process of grieving for and caring for my sick dog. The first thing I learned is that I am weak.
When my vet explained to me that Lucy may need to be put to sleep sooner rather than later, part of me hoped for sooner. Part of me hoped that I would not have to pick up my dog and take her home and live with her and love her knowing that our days together were numbered and that she was doomed. Part of me hoped that my memories of Lucy's boundless vigor would not also include memories of sickness, weakness, discomfort. I did not want to see Lucy stumble. And, I desperately hoped to avoid ever needing to decide that it was "time."
People began to show up in the office for the 9:00 mediation. I put the Kleenex box back in the drawer. Erin was waiting an update from me. I couldn't call her and compose myself in time for the mediation. Plus, I wanted to wait for the results from the next red blood cell count test before calling. I wanted to know what I needed to tell her.
Erin texted me at 9:24. "Heard from vet?"
"Not yet. In mediation."
The mediation fell apart around 11:00 and Dr. McCoy called not long after that to tell me that Lucy's red blood cell count was stable and that she could go home with me. I called Erin on the way to the vet's office.
"Lucy has cancer and the vet expects she might live two months. There's nothing they can do. I'm going to pick her up right now. I'm sorry to have to tell you this way." I had to say it all very fast. I could barely say it all before I couldn't say anything else.
Erin wanted me to ask Dr. McCoy two questions:
"Is she in pain?"
"She doesn't seem to be, but I can give you Tramadol for when she is."
"Can she still go on hikes?"
"I wouldn't."
Also, no more frisbee. Lucy had been catching frisbee eight days before her diagnosis.
Dr. McCoy told me to boil chicken breasts for Lucy and mix it with rice and vegetables. She told me Lucy and I could take short walks around the block. And, she told me what to watch for. White or pale gums would indicate another acute bleed. Watch for if she is acutely down or having trouble breathing.
"Is her belly going to get more distended or will the steroids reduce that?"
"Her belly is going to get more distended."
This is what I feared. She will become sicker before my eyes.
* * *
These are the stories of how my dog lived and how she died. They are the stories of how I loved her and how I grieve her.
I'm writing these stories before she dies because I know myself. I know that when she dies, the memory of her passing will be so painful I won't want to remember it and that any memory of her larger-than-life feats and the unceasing joy with which she lived will open a still-empty place in my chest. Something hard and metallic will get caught in my throat. Any memory will be bittersweet and wrapped in gauze. After Lucy dies, I will not confront the pain. I will move on. Now, I can't avoid the pain. Now, the rawness of my fear and persistent metallic taste in my mouth feels appropriate. Feeling any other way would feel a betrayal of the fierce exuberance with which she lived. Now is the time to write these stories. Because I know I am weak enough to want to forget.
I have lost three cats as an adult: Blue, Crooktail, and Marvin. I know from losing them that my warm memories will still be tainted years later by the bitter sense that all of them died before they should have and in ways unfitting to the way they lived. I expect that if I don't write this now, I never will. So, I have to do it now even though every moment that my fingers are on the keys is a moment that my fingers are not in Lucy's fur.
* * *
When I first learned Lucy was going to die, my instincts and habits migrated immediately towards minimizing my personal grief and pain. I knew, immediately, how devastating each moment at home would be, how crushingly sweet each opportunity to pet her, feed her, walk her would be, part of me wanted to not be able to take her home. Part of me wanted the doctor to report that Lucy continued to bleed heavily in her abdomen and needed to be put to sleep that day.
While I believe everyone experiences grief deeply, we will also respond to that grief differently. For me, my natural instinct is to flee from it. This experience has been a process of me watching myself attempt to turn away and forcing myself to return. I am trying to live at the center of this fear, the place where my throat gets tight and hard.
But, describing the pain as having a "center" strikes me as too facile a description and too generous towards my own motivations. The map of this pain is not a circle, but rather a number of circles. It's multifocal, and I have not planted myself heroically inside the middle of the pain, but rather I wander in search of a less painful place. As I away from "doing the right thing" for Lucy (being present, caring for her, arranging her death), I wander toward the pain of regret and shame. Lucy and I both are trying to find the most comfortable positions in a damned painful situation.
Some people are better at grief, at pain, than others. I am about as good at frisbee as I am bad about grief. I took a test once to determine my Enneagram character type. I am the "pleasure seeking" type, the "epicure". One of the defining characteristics of an epicure is the extreme lengths to which he or she will go to avoid pain. I spent most of my twenties drinking and smoking myself away from pain, self-doubt, and an enduring sense that I am fundamentally deficient. The hardest part about a sudden sobriety was the return of those feelings, which were now combined with feelings of dread and failure and the fear that I had squandered all the opportunities my parents, teachers, and country had provided me.
The truth is that we cannot escape the pain. And, we shouldn't try to. Grieving well means choosing a pain we can live with. I don't mean this to sound noble. I'm trapped. If I could find an escape or a less painful place, I would. This grief has stripped from me, finally and again, the illusion of control. I want to run, but there is nowhere to run that is less awful than where I am right now.
I am ashamed that I ever sought to avoid the grief that Lucy deserves by hoping—partly—that she would need to be put to sleep the day of her diagnosis.
When Dr. McCoy explained that they offered in-home euthanasia, my psyche immediately recoiled at the idea, "I do not want a spot in my house to be 'the spot where Lucy died.'" The thought was too horrible to even contemplate.
Thank God I was able to take Lucy home with me. Living with this grief and caring for Lucy while she is sick has made me a better person.
Now, I hope that we will be able to put Lucy to sleep at home. It will crush us, but it will be the best, most comfortable way for her to go. Our vet is only available on weekdays and may not be available even then for in-home euthanasia if they are short-staffed at the clinic. So, I have arranged for Dr. Lauralee Rubsch, a vet with a mobile practice, to be "on call" when the time comes. I can't tell you how comforting it is to know that we have this plan in place.
I understand that my obligation is not to my comfort, but to Lucy's. My habitual selfishness is my continual shame.
The vet has offered to take Lucy to the crematorium. Or, she said, I could take her.
"Whichever you prefer."
It never occurred to me that a man might prefer to take his animal to get cremated himself. Now, I'm thinking that I actually would prefer to take her myself. It seems like it's my responsibility, my obligation. Somehow, dropping her off in a stranger's mobile vet unit to be transported to a crematorium would be falling short of my obligation to my dog. Failing to do everything I can for her myself—both now and after she dies—would fail to fully honor Lucy's contribution to my life.
When our cat, Crooktail, died in Palau, I took him to the vet's office and had them bury him in the jungle behind their clinic. I am still disappointed in myself for failing to bury him in our backyard. The love you give to a pet is not just the lighthearted camaraderie, not just the adventures, the snuggles. The love you give to a pet is also the burden of grief you bear for them. With Crooktail, I feel like I tried to get all of the easy, fun stuff and wriggled out of the hard stuff. With Lucy, I refuse to wriggle out. I'm becoming better at living with the grief and becoming more dedicated to honoring her life by being present for the process of her death.
Now, I don't want to avoid the grief. Rather, I want my grief to evolve, to grow, to become a grief worthy of my fearless dog.
* * *
Lucy has lived in three places in her life: Lexington, Boulder, and now Louisville. There is no question that the happiest year of her life was the year she spent in Boulder. She stayed there with a friend of mine while Erin and I lived in Palau. Jessica had two dogs, a house just outside of Boulder, and a job that allowed her to take the dogs on long walks almost daily long walks in the Colorado hills.
Jessica came to Lexington to pick Lucy up before we left for Palau. Lucy hopped right up into the back seat of the car with her friends, Jolie and Sadie. Lucy is always ready for an adventure.
I returned a year later and went directly to the 2008 Democratic National Convention in Denver. Four days and one nomination for President later, Jessica came to Denver and picked me up to reunite me with my dog.
"Um, Ben," Jessica said as we drove through the outskirts of Denver. "Lucy has put on some weight."
"Brad let her eat as much as she wanted."
"Oh." I paused. I considered the full implications of this statement. "Wow."
Lucy is a pound dog. She lives with a scarcity mentality. Left to her own devices, she eats until she makes herself sick, gets sick, eats the sick, and then eats some more.
I always kept Lucy trim because I didn't want her carrying any more weight than she needed to. Lucy is a frisbee dog and she can't help not soaring through the air to catch the frisbee. I worry about her hips and the wear that this jumping must cause.
When Lucy bounded out Jessica's door, I thought Jessica had taken a small black bear cub as a pet. Lucy's hair was long and she was carrying 15 more pounds on her frame. It had been one great year for Lucy dog. Eating as much as she could, hiking, swimming, hanging with two other dogs. No dog could hope for more.
Should I feel sad or ashamed that the best year of my dog's life was the year in which I was absent from it? I don't. Instead, I feel eternally grateful to Jessica for giving Lucy the life she deserved and satisfied with myself that I helped that happen by getting Lucy from the pound the summer before my first year of law school.
I suspect that Lucy's heaven will look remarkably similar to the Boulder she already knows. It will smell of pine and her bowl and her belly will always be full.
* * *
I got Lucy in the summer of 2003. I was doing some superficial renovations to a house my parents had bought in Lexington for my sister and me to live in. I was beginning law school and she was fresh out of college. I had just moved from DC where I had plopped down for a year after traveling after college to five countries for a year on a Watson Fellowship. I was excited to have a place to settle down. And, settling down meant having a dog. Nothing was a more powerful symbol in my mind of being settled than having a dog.
I wasn't renting. I wasn't traveling. I was home.
A few weeks before I got Lucy, my extended family gathered in Maui for Camp Jasper. In Maui, the Hana Highway wends its way along the coastline to dozens of waterfalls, swimming holes, and diving rocks. Early one morning, I loaded into my cousin Brent's rented Jeep and he and his wife, Julie and I headed toward Hana. We stopped at a sandwich shop at the start of the trip and picked up sandwiches, yes, but also one of the owner's dogs, Lani. The owner explained that each of her dogs knew the road and all of the attractions along the way. Lani was a canine tour guide. Sure enough, as we parked at various attractions, Lani hopped out of the Jeep first and ran to the trailhead leading to the falls, pool, or overlook. She waited for us there. She knew where to go no matter where we parked.
I wanted a dog like this. I wanted a dog that was ready for adventure. Smart enough to keep up and fast enough for frisbee. I got all of this when I got Lucy.
I picked up Lucy from the Lexington Humane Society. She had been dropped off in the Night Drop box a month earlier. The workers named her "Lucky." I thought it was lame to have a pound dog named "Lucky", so I dropped the "k". Lucky had been described on petfinder.com as a border collie mix. When I got to the pound, they gave me a ball and Lucky and I went out into the small side yard. I threw the ball, she sprinted after it, grabbed it off the bounce, and brought it back to me.
She did not drop it. She stood there, head down, her jaw mashing the tennis ball. Mash. Mash. Mash.
We [mash] could [mash] work [mash]on [mash] that. Mash. Mash. Mash.
Alright. Let's go.
Lucy, née Lucky, hopped up into the shotgun side of my red '97 Toyota pickup truck and we were off.
When we got home, Lucy bounded out of the truck and into the backyard. Three seconds later, she was neck deep in the 4'x3' water feature that sat—neglected, stagnant, and foul—in the back of the yard. A week earlier, I had pulled a broken glass bong out of the bottom of the pool. The bong wasn't mine, but the dog that now had her front paws on the side of the pond and was scrabbling out and grinning widely most certainly was.
We were home.
* * *
I had done a lot of reading about adopting a dog and dog ownership before picking Lucy up from the pound. So, I knew that I needed to show Lucy a) that I was boss and b) that she should pay attention to me. One of the ways I was supposed to do this was by tying Lucy's leash to my belt and going about my business around the house. This would communicate to her that she should follow me around.
I have participated in a lot of unnecessary bullshit in my life—the SATs, traffic court, law school—but tethering my dog, my working dog that understands and responds to complete sentences, that knows where every cat in our neighborhood lives, that twice returned to my car parked miles away from where we got separated in the woods, tethering my dog to me completely, absolutely unnecessary.
Tethering her to me was like throwing Br'er Rabbit directly into the briar patch.
This is what is so hard about losing Lucy: for the last 9 years I have never been alone in a room; she has been my constant companion.
She has also been my partner in the only magic trick I know.
A well-trained dog is like a magic trick. I always felt like my relationship with Lucy was a kind of sorcery. Here is a force—an incredibly fast, agile, and tough force—that exists outside of my body but over which I could exert some (occasionally minimal) control over.
Lucy is a frisbee dog to her core. It is what she was born to do. When I was looking to adopt a dog, I knew I wanted a dog that would play frisbee with me, which meant I was looking for some variety of collie, setter, heeler, or shepherd. I got a little of each with Lucy.
In college, I played Ultimate Frisbee and disc golf. I am not an athletic guy, but I can throw a frisbee. If you plotted my athletic skills in various sports on a bell chart, my frisbee skills would be just to the right of my similarly useless and oddly formidable ping-pong skills.
No way I was going to get a dog that couldn't play frisbee.
I probably read more about "how to teach your dog frisbee" than I did "how to not fail out of law school" in the summer before my 1L year. So, when I brought Lucy home, I knew the first step was to feed her out of the frisbee. Next, I began rolling the frisbee across the floor. Lucy would chase after it like a ball. After that, I placed the frisbee in her mouth and took it out. Repeat. Repeat again. Then, we quickly graduated to catching short (one foot) tosses. The final step was teaching Lucy to circle around my legs before retrieving a thrown ball. Lucy learned to circle counter-clockwise because I'm right-handed. I'm not sure the direction matters. But, when she circles my legs, Lucy is placed behind me, so she can track the frisbee as I release it.
Lucy learned to catch a frisbee in less than two weeks. It was not hard. I think probably she would have learned in less if I hadn't spent so much time rolling the frisbee across the floor, putting the frisbee in her mouth.
"That's for sure, dad."
Lucy learned to catch a hard plastic, lightweight frisbee from PetSmart. We then moved on to catching 175-gram hard plastic Ultimate frisbees. Don't do this: your dog will catch the frisbee. If your dog is like Lucy, your dog will catch basically anything you throw to her. But, a frisbee that hard and large will hurt your dog's mouth. Lucy often bit her tongue and would come back, smiling, with a slightly bloody, slightly muddy disc in her mouth, ready for another throw.
Instead, buy the Jawz brand frisbee. These frisbees are great to throw—they're heavier than the cheap, plastic frisbees, but not as heavy as an Ultimate disc. They're smaller in diameter than an ultimate disc, as well. More like a frisbee golf disc in size, but made out of a durable, but soft urethane. We buy the Uglies (cosmetic defects) because they're cheaper. These frisbees are heavier than hard plastic disks, so they fly farther and cut better through any wind. Lucy loves these discs and I'm ashamed I didn't learn of their existence sooner. She lost one of her little front teeth at some point. I'm sure it was on one of these hard plastic frisbees. I'm also sure she hasn't missed it a bit. Or, at least, considers the trade a fair exchange.
Lucy never learned the command "drop it" very well. I mean, I know she understands what "drop it" means, she just decided that she didn't like it very much. So, early in our friendship, we compromised by me bringing two frisbees, two balls, two somethings to throw and I stopped having to say "drop it". She always wants the one in my hand more than the one in her mouth, so she is more than happy to drop the frisbee at my feet as she rounded my legs, ready for another throw.
It still seems like magic that I could throw a disc as hard as I could, watch it silhouetted in an orange sky, watch it fade to the left, and watch my dog—small and getting smaller—float across the ground, leap into the air, grab the frisbee with her certain teeth, land, turn, and begin to float back to me.
Just magic.
I am going to miss that magic so much.
* * *
One of the hardest aspects of living with Lucy's diagnosis of hemangio sarcoma is the vet's prohibition on any exertion. No hiking. No running. And definitely no frisbee. Lucy's condition is delicate.
I haven't read too much on hemangio sarcoma. I know it is a blood-born tumor. I know the tumors are on her liver and spleen. I know it's not operable. And, I know that these tumors cause internal bleeding. Ultimately, it will be this bleeding that kills her. Even now, her belly is getting tight and a little more swollen each day with fluid. I have stopped feeding her twice a day and instead feed her smaller portions four times a day. Her belly can't hold as much food because of the internal pressure. The vet made it clear that vigorous activity would likely cause another acute bleed and lead to her demise. So, in this time between diagnosis and death, Lucy can't do the things she most loves doing.
Eight days before the diagnosis, Lucy, Pugsley, Erin and I went to the middle school down the street from our house and Lucy and I tossed frisbee for 15 or 20 minutes. When I was in law school, Lucy and I would go toss frisbee—nonstop—for an hour and a half. She didn't want to be in the house and I didn't want to be in a law book, so it worked out well for both of us.
Now, though, we're taking walks. I'm allowed to toss ball to Lucy, gently, in the house. Lucy is really only happy when she's working. It is what she lives for. I have thought in the past that Lucy might actually kill herself with pure exuberance; part of me knows that's how she would want to go. Part of me thinks she'd rather me arrange for in-home euthanasia, take her to the park, toss a bunch of frisbees, and bring her home panting. I don't have the guts to do it.
* * *
This evening, we were walking back from the middle school and a small rabbit bounded across Lucy's path. I did not allow her to give chase; hunting rabbits definitely is "vigorous activity." Lucy has chased many rabbits. Earlier today, in fact, she cornered a rabbit in our backyard. The rabbit was tucked unmoving behind a fencepost, so Lucy was unable to kill it. But, when I called for her to come in she was sitting—belly down, paws forward, intent—on a stakeout. I made her come in. Puglsey went out. He went to within two inches of where the rabbit was hiding, failed to notice the rabbit. Instead, he paused, sniffed, hiked his legs, peed, scampered back up the deck steps, and plopped himself back onto his couch.
Lucy's lifetime record against rabbits is 2–1,352. For years, I thought that when Lucy took off across a field after a rabbit she was just inviting the rabbits run up the score. Then, on a run in Lexington's Arboretum, Lucy disappeared into the woods, hot on the trail of a rabbit.
"Here we go again," I thought.
Lucy's hunt usually meant me waiting around for her, calling her, and, occasionally, having to go find her in the woods. Not this time.
I kept running and was about 100 yards up a hill when she emerged from the woods, a large, walnut-brown jackrabbit draped from her jaws. As she approached, I realized that I didn't really know what I should do with the rabbit. So, I did nothing. Lucy reluctantly dropped him after I told her to and we left her trophy laying in the grass, his left eye staring up at the blue sky.
Lucy may have had an atrocious win–loss record against rabbits, but that one victory was all she needed. Word spread fast in the rabbit community, I'm sure, that this dog was an actual threat. This dog, unlike so many other dogs, was for real.
That was Lucy's first kill. Her second came on August 9, 2012. Lucy and I were out on our nightly trip to Highlands Middle School's field. As Lucy sniffed along the fenceline and ate some grass, I wandered into the field through the hot, dark air. Once I get a little bit away from Lucy, she will generally trot over, figure out where we're heading next, and scout ahead for me. But, last night, as I walked away from Lucy, I saw her dark shadow trotting towards home, not me. I yelled for her and she stopped, took a few steps toward me, and then started walking towards home again. I thought that she was just really, really tired, so I started walking after her. It wasn't until we got to the end of the field and I bent to put hook her leash onto her collar before I saw that Lucy was carrying a small rabbit in her jaws. It was totally dead. She had caught a rabbit and now it was time to go home.
That Lucy caught another rabbit, even just a small one, made me very happy because since we have begun our nightly walks we encounter rabbits every night and every night Lucy wants to give chase. But, she remembers how fast they are. She feels how slow she is. We feel sad. Getting one last rabbit helped us both feel young again. That we need death to make death feel a little less inevitable, even for a moment, should trouble me more deeply than it does.
* * *
Killing that jackrabbit in Lexington has to be one of the best days in Lucy's life. There were a lot of very good days. Some have become part of McCarter lore and I write them here so we will not forget.
There was the day we went out to Erin's dad's farm. Lucy really should have lived on a farm. I do feel a bit bad that I was not able to give her that every day, but, one of the benefits of adopting a dog from the pound is that you can look at your dog laying in front of the TV or wandering around in a fenced yard and think to yourself, "She really should be on a farm, but you know what? This beats the pound."
Erin's dad lives in a valley called "North Fork" in Greenup County where he raises cattle. Greg hopped on a four-wheeler and Erin and I loaded into a Grasshopper, a sort of utility four-wheeler with a payload in the back. We spent the afternoon riding up and down the hills around Greg's farm. Lucy saw her first cow and immediately went into herding mode—hunching down, staying low, unblinking.
At one of the cattle ponds, Lucy got to retrieve sticks. She swims like an otter. I threw a stick into the middle of the pond. She swam to an area near the center of the concentric ripples made by the stick, but grabbed another stick floating in the water. She turned and began swimming towards shore, her head barely above the water. She was swimming much slower than usual—struggling. A few moments later, Erin and I understood why: a tree trunk surfaced behind Lucy. The stick Lucy had grabbed was clearly a branch near the top of the tree. It took her about two minutes, but she dragged the goddamn tree to shore. She was so pleased with herself. We were so pleased with her.
When we got back to Greg's house, Lucy and I went to the barn where Greg had stored circular hay bales three high. She and I climbed up and ran around on top of them, hopping from one to another, scrambling in between them. Down below, Erin and her dad surveyed the new calf. As evening settled in, Greg rewarded Lucy by letting her eat a bunch of cattle feed, which I understand is made of molasses and corn an all sorts of other delicious deliciousness. It smells almost like corn whiskey mash. Lucy ate her fill, we thanked Greg for a great day, and Lucy climbed into the back of my station wagon. I turned on the headlights. Lucy's breath smelled like cow feed. My car soon smelled like cow feed. As we turned into downtown Russell, the smell was overpowering. We rolled down the windows.
A few minutes later, we parked in front of Erin's little house and stumbled through the front door. Erin and I were in the kitchen when we began to smell cattle feed again. I walked into the living room and four neat, perfectly circular, perfectly brown cow patties dotted Erin's white rug. Lucy went out back. And, after I cleaned up the barf in the living room, I went out to my station wagon where two more cow patties rested in the back of the station wagon. Well, that explains the smell.
Cow feed expands in the stomach, I learned. Lucy had eaten a lot of cow feed. What a legendary day.
Lucy lives the McCarter creed: anything worth doing is worth doing to excess. This was clear from the first day I met her and she dove into a shallow, putrid pond in my backyard. It became clear to my friends when we canoed in Kentucky's Red River Gorge for my bachelor party. Lucy ran and swam the seven mile stretch, but did so by running down the bank, doubling back, checking on our progress, running down the bank, doubling back, checking our progress, and running back down the bank again. She must have run thirty miles that day. I'm not even kidding. That was the only day in her life that she was tuckered out. She was so tired and sore at the end of that day, that she didn't even hang out by the fire that night to eat burned marshmallows Instead, she curled up next to my suitcase and growled at anyone who came close to her. She was so tired she was defenseless.
* * *
Lucy is my dog and I am her human. We know this. Not long after Erin and I moved to Louisville, I dropped Lucy off at my folks' place on my way to West Virginia for the weekend. When I came back 48 hours later, my dad said, "When you left this morning, Lucy went into my closet and laid down. I couldn't get her to come out and stay with me. Then I realized that your shoes were in there. I picked up your shoes and moved them into the study; she stayed there for the next two days." More recently, this has happened with a pair of jeans and socks. Choosing my smelly socks: what else could a dog do to say, "I'm your dog. You're my human."
Lucy is my dog and I am her human. Lucy is a major character in conversations at the McCarter house. If you don't have pets, or if you have pets but don't vocalize their inner dialogue, you probably stopped reading a long time ago. So, readers who have made it this far will understand that Lucy has a voice. Her voice, for whatever reason, sounds a lot like Napoleon Dynamite.
Losing Lucy will be losing the opportunity to talk through her. Make jokes with her. About her. She's one of the funniest members of our household. She speaks in declarative sentences and, like Napoleon Dynamite, poses naive questions with obvious answers. Those questions are almost statements.
"Um, guys, do you know the cat is on the counter again?
"Are you guys going to eat all of that steak?"
It is not an accident that much of Lucy's dialogue is composed of questions. Lucy is inquisitive. You don't become a dog that understands complete sentences without being curious about the ways of humans and being a quick study. She learned to "take it nice" in two minutes. She knew "go to your crate" in two seconds. Despite close contact with us for over nine years, I think we are still somewhat of an enigma to her. How could it be any different? We spend most of our time staring at screens.
* * *
Lucy and I have not played as much frisbee since we moved to Louisville. Lucy's life in Louisville has not been what it should have been. She's lived in a house with a too-small yard with a too-high fence and a too-busy dad.
But, Lucy's hips have also shown more age in recent years. It's hard to take my dog to go play frisbee when I know
So, we typically play a combination of frisbee and ball to minimize the amount of time she spends soaring through the air.
I am desperately thankful we played frisbee on July 10, 2012. We would learn a week later that she had cancer. We didn't know anything was wrong with Lucy on that day except that she was getting old. Still, when you have an old dog, you know that each frisbee session might be her last. Or, at least, you understand that the number of times you'll get to do this together are numbered. Erin and I cherish these times.
* * *
As much as Lucy is my dog, she's also Erin's dog. Erin and I have been together for nine years. We started dating just before I got Lucy. There's never been an "us" that didn't also include Lucy. That's not true for any other animal that we own. Her cat, Marvin, died in 2008. Together, we got all of our other pets through happenstance or bad judgment or both.
It is freaking me out that we are losing a part of "us". Erin thinks Lucy is funny. We will certainly laugh less without her around.
Lucy was at our engagement. No one else was. We took the video of Lucy catching a frisbee just a few minutes after Erin said "yes" on the top of Max Patch above Hot Springs, North Carolina. As Erin and I hugged, the ring snug on her finger, Lucy rolled in something very smelly on the side of the hill. She was so pleased with herself. We were not pleased (it would be a long ride back to the cabin), but we were engaged.
Lucy rolls in things often enough that we now have a "Shower Song" that I sing to her whenever we are taking a shower together. I will not sing it for you, but the words go something like this, depending on what I suspect she rolled in:
Gonna get clean, clean, clean,
'Cause you rolled in shit, dog shit,
Gonna get clean, clean, clean in the shower [in the shower!]
Gonna get clean, clean, clean in the shower.
She seems to like the "Shower Song". She tolerates it, anyway. She knows her dad is not a poet.
* * *
There are some things, besides showers, Lucy doesn't like:
Looking over this list, it occurs to me that Lucy really doesn't like a lot of things on this earth. Lucy's "circle of trust" is exceedingly small and I have lived my entire time with her on the inside of it. For a being like Dharma, landing—inexplicably—outside the circle meant weathering years of Lucy's suspicious badgering. For a being like me, landing—inexplicably—inside the circle meant years of singleminded devotion. Lucy has exerted every fiber of muscle, every firing of a neuron to knowing me, understanding me, trying to please and protect me.
* * *
Lucy is sleeping on the floor now. Before she got sick, she has always preferred to sleep at my feet in the bed.
I think she's sleeping in the floor for three reasons:
So, I have begun sleeping on the floor now, too. In 2002–2003, I lived in D.C. in a room too small for a bed; I'm pretty good at it. Not long after we started sleeping on the floor, I woke up in the middle of the night and Lucy had moved and curled up right next to me. The moment was so sweet for me; Lucy had never moved closer to me in the middle of the night. She will either start and stay at my feet or start there and settle down in her bed on the floor at some point. I started rubbing her belly and almost immediately she got perturbed with my fussiness and moved away.
It was totally worth it.
* * *
I am getting better at living with a sick dog and living with my grief. I am crying less. I can talk with my vet without crying. Much. I am starting to anticipate Lucy's changing tastes and changing appetite. It breaks my heart that she no longer likes peanut butter. This was always an easy pleasure (and an easy way to give medicine). I keep boiled chicken on hand, but have migrated to the Merrick brand of canned dog foods. Merrick meals offer great varieties of meats and veggies. If it's not a "Wild Buffalo Grill" day, it can be a "New Zealand Summer" day. If it's a "Mediterranean Banquet" day, Lucy is eating lamb, brown rice, chick peas, spinach, and golden delicious apples. I am considering keeping a few cans for myself in the McCarter bomb shelter.
It is so good to be able to "spoil" Lucy with these delicacies.
More than anything, I don't want Lucy to suffer. I especially don't want her to know that she is dying. We are giving her steroids to hopefully slow the tumor growth and Pepsid to suppress nausea. After the diagnosis, we overspoiled Lucy and she got diarrhea bad enough that we went to the animal emergency room on Sunday morning. We thought it might be the end. The vet tested her red blood cell count. He assured us she was stable, prescribed an anti-diarrheal paste, and sent us home. Before we left, he explained how common hemangio sarcoma is. He explained how it worked and explained that of all the ways for dogs to go, this one was one of the best. It is the most similar to just falling asleep.
He was very kind.
* * *
Lucy lays on her side a lot now. Like I said, it's the position she feels most comfortable in, I think. She is resting next to me right now (Friday night, August 4) after a late evening walk. "Hey buddy," I say to her. She looks up and thumps her tail a few times for me. These days, that tail thump makes my heart leap for joy and crushes me at the same time.
I just want that tail to keep thumping.
Because we are not allowed to do anything else, Lucy and I are going on walks. We slap on her prong collar and the retractable leash and set out in the early morning or late at night; we prowl the alleys around our house. She stops often to pee. She stops often to smell. We take our time. This is not common. We are usually in a hurry to get to the middle school to play frisbee. Lucy is usually trying to stay in front of Pugsley. (She cannot not be in front. Erin used to mess with Lucy and run just barely in front of her on runs. It drove Lucy nuts.)
It was a full moon last night. It was almost full, and just as orange-yellow, tonight. Last night, we walked to the middle school and laid down in the grass. We hadn't done that for a long time.
We were still. We thought deep thoughts. I have not been myself.
* * *
Besides walks, here are the things we are enjoying these days:
* * *
I am trying to tell whether Lucy feels rotten. Well, it is clear that she feels rotten: she has a hard time going up and down stairs with her additional weight and she has a hard time getting comfortable when she's laying down. What I'm trying to tell is whether she knows she is dying. I've spent a lot of time looking into Lucy's eyes in the last four weeks and I don't see that knowledge in them.
But it could just be that Lucy's eyes are a kind of Rorschach test. I could just be seeing just what I want to see. I desperately want her to not understand. I want her to feel slower, feel bloated, but not know that she will soon be the rabbit in the dog's mouth. When the euthanist comes, I want to look at her for the last time without her also knowing it will be the last time. That's purely selfish. That's just me feeling pretty damn confident I couldn't bear that. I am crying as I type this. I look over and Lucy is looking at me.
"Hi!" I say, smiling through the tears.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Lucy's tail just keeps beating. This gives me hope. We go for a walk.
If Lucy knows, she's not telling me she knows. Because I'm her human. She knows that I know that I couldn't bear it if she knew.
* * *
I am afraid we are getting close to the end. It's August 10 and Lucy hasn't eaten much today. Her belly is quite large. I was only able to give her medicine this morning by hiding it in peanut butter (which she won't eat) and plastering that to the side of a Rocko's Rewards treat that I bought from Lenore at the Douglass Loop Farmers Market. I will say this: Lucy turned down boiled chicken, she turned down cubed buffalo. She cannot resist a Rocko's treat, even if it is partially covered in nasty, mediciny peanut butter. I'm not sure what Lenore's doing to those treats, but they are a gift. Being able to find some vehicle with which to deliver to your dog a pain-relieving pill is a true comfort.
* * *
The end came on August 12, 2012. When I got home from church, Lucy did not greet me at the door. She was laying next to my chair in the living room. Her tail was thump, thump, thumping away, but she was not moving. Her belly was so tight. Tight like the time she ate too much cattle feed. Tight like the time she ate a loaf of multigrain bread.
Thump, thump, thump.
It was time.
I called the vet. I called Erin. She had to drive back from Lexington. While we waited for their arrivals, Lucy and I listened to music. She let me pet her, fuss over her, cry over her.
She drank some water.
It was time.
The vet, Dr. Lauralee Rubsch, was a pro. Lucy's departure went as well as this sort of thing can go.
We petted her, cried over her, kissed on her. We told her what a good dog she was. How we loved her desperately, forever.
It was time.
"Go be free," Dr. Rubsch whispered. Perfect words.
Lucy was gone. Somewhere, she was running. The air around her was filled with the smell of fresh pine and wild game. Her heart was thumping against her sturdy chest.
Somehow, my heart kept thumping.
The night before Lucy died, she and I walked over to the field at Highlands Middle School. Lucy did not run. She didn't stray far from me. We laid down in the field and looked up. That night was the height of the Perseids, the annual meteor shower bonanza.
We rested.
We watched the cold, ancient stones burn across the sky.
We are dust, heat, and light. All of us.
Of the three, Lucy was mostly light.


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Wednesday November 18,2015 : SNEIDERMAN TAKES AIM AT YAHOO DFS
Determined to rid the State of DFS which he categorises as illegal gambling.
New York Attorney General Eric Sneiderman has turned his sights on Yahoo's daily fantasy sports (DFS) offer including the company in its investigation on FanDuel and DraftKings.
In response, Yahoo said it will continue to service New York State daily fantasy sports players as it believes it offers "a lawful product for our Daily Fantasy Sports users" but will continue to monitor industry trends and events closely.
In related news, New York State Senator Michael Ranzenhofer introduced bill S06092 earlier this week in support of daily fantasy sports. The bill proposes exempting all forms of fantasy sports games from being classed as a contest of chance but is unlikely to be heard in the current session.
"Time and time again, New York has stood in the way, whether by over-regulation or outright banning, of activities that are legal and enjoyed in most states across the country," Ranzenhofer said. "This bill further protects the rights of businesses and individuals who wish to engage in this type of commerce in the state of New York."
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PokerStars.CZ has launched in the Czech Republic, becoming the first licensed online casino and poker operator under the Czech Republics new gaming regulation. This follows on from the approval by the Czech State Supervision of Gambling and Lotteries Department.
Luckia Games in Partnership with NYX Gaming Group -
NYX will provide Luckia with its open gaming system, NYX OGS, and open platform system, NYX OPS, to support the growth of its established Spanish operation.
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First Woman to Win a WPT Playground Championship -
Besting a field of 380, in the C$3,500 buy-in event, Zajmovic beat Jean-Francois Bouchard in heads up play, pocketed the C$261,000 first prize and a seat in the season ending WPT Tournament of Champions.
NHL Odds: Oilers-Blackhawks at the United Cente -
Fans at the United Center will be treated to a potential Western Conference playoff preview this Saturday when the upstart Edmonton Oilers visit the Chicago Blackhawks. The puck drops at 7 PM ET on WGN.
2017 Partypoker.net WPT Playground main event Results -
Although she entered the heads up against Jean-Francois Bouchard with a chip deficit, Zajmovic was able to get herself back in the game with some skillful and disciplined playing, eventually overtaking the leader and finally leveraging her chip advantage into a decisive win.
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The Miss Cleveland Pageant was held on June 12. Thomas Sitterud was the master of ceremonies for the evening. The contestants were introduced and competed in categories according to their ages. The judges for the event were Heather Atwood, Lisa Johnson and Emily Huntington. In the Tiny Tot category Brooklyn O'Neil performed a dance/gymnastics routine to Lollypop. Maycin Sitterud and Kaybree Jensen also performed dances.
In the Little Miss category Jabry Sharp performed a dance to Move It.
In the princess category Kylee Cunningham performed a dance and Madison Mann performed a dance for her talent.
In the Junior Miss category, Kaili Merrell performed a lyrical dance.
There were two contestants in the Miss Cleveland division. Bayler Griffin performed the song, Hallelujah and Chyanne Carter performed a humorous skit she wrote herself.
The contestants were escorted by their fathers, brothers or a friend for the evening wear/party dress portion of the competition. Each contestant was asked an on-stage question. "If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?"
Brooklyn O'Neil said she would go camping, because it's fun. Kaybree Jensen said she would go camping because it's fun. Maycin Sitterud said she would like to go to Africa to see the elephants.
Jabry Sharp said she would like to go to Hawaii and see the beach.
Kylie Cunningham would like to go to Italy because she has family there.
Madisyn Mann said she would like to see the great wall of China.
Kaili Merrell said she would like to tour Europe.
Bayler Griffin hopes to go to California to surf and to meet hot guys who can teach her how to surf.
Chyanne Carter would like to go to Venice to see the art the city has to offer.
After the categories were complete the royalty for 2013 performed for the audience and made their final walks. Kaitlyn Saling the 2013 Miss Cleveland sang, "On my Own."
The winners were announced: Tiny Tot: Maycin Sitterud, Junior Miss, Kaili Merrell, Princess-Madisyn Mann; Miss Cleveland-Bayler Griffin; Little Miss-Jabry Sharp and Miss Congeniality-Chyanne Carter.
Thomas Sitterud thanked everyone for coming and for the decorations and pageant committee members work in putting the pageant together.


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GDR: WCQ Gm 2 - Blackhawks @ Canucks
Cam Davie
April 15 2011 09:26AM
"HEEEEEY! Danny! We gotta score some goals. Time for our impressing of a washing machine."
"Yeah, I know. Cycle, cycle, cycle."
(Photo by Jeff Vinnick/NHLI via Getty Images)
Game Day Recon: Western Conference Quarterfinal Game 2 - Blackhawks @ Canucks
Roberto Luongo and the Vancouver Canucks played a nearly perfect game on Wednesday to come away with the victory and the early series lead. But they did that both times the Canucks and Blackhawks previously met in the playoffs. So the question for Game 2 is:
Can the Vancouver Canucks take a 2-0 series lead for the first time in three tries against the Chicago Blackhawks?
Broadcast Info
Game Time: 7:00 PM PT
The Intel
(before the intel)
*** Congrats to the folks at Blackhawks Down Low for winning the Blogging for Charity auction. They won the services of some truly fantastic bloggers to write for them for the duration of the Blackhawks' playoff run. Our boys Thom and Mike were OH SO CLOSE to a winning bid, but the folks at BHDL outbid us at the last second. Good on them though, since all the money is going to charity. We've linked to them in our Links section below.
(ok, let's move on to the intel)
The Canucks' performance in Game 1 was perfectly indicative of how I outlined the comparison between the two teams. Sure the Blackhawks are good. And they were good in Game 1. But the Canucks are better, and they were better in Game 1. For the Canucks, it started with Roberto Luongo and his stellar play for his second career playoff shutout. But the Canucks also set the tone physically from very early on, and kept it up for the full sixty minutes. Sure, the Canucks had a lull in the second period... but don't they always? Yes. Yes, they always do. They clearly don't like skating the extra 30 feet to get to the bench.
The Blackhawks lack of physical play was quite evident throughout the game. Not only are the Blackhawks missing a couple of players because of injury, but they were sure missing the gritty players that were so key in beating the Canucks the last two post-seasons. While Troy Brouwer came back, still nursing a sore shoulder, he was mostly ineffective and didn't register a hit. Dave Bolland is still out and won't be back for game 2. Now the Blackhawks will be without Tomas Kopecky for Game 2 as well. It's expected that Fernando Pisani will draw in to the lineup for Kopecky. Pisani is a decent sub for Kopecky, as Pisano averages over 1 hit per game, had 2G 1A in 3 games against VAN, and is 51.5% in the faceoff circle - all better numbers than Kopecky. But Pisani only played 60 games this season, missing 15 of 22 games because of injury and was scratched for the other 7.
As for the Canucks, they were solid top to bottom. Not one player had a bad night and some players had terrific efforts. Luongo, Kesler, Hansen, Edler, and Hamhuis all had superb games. The Sedins were good but not their usual dominant self. If the Canucks want to finally win game 2 in a series against the Blackhawks, they need to duplicate if not surpass their physical play from Game 1. They must know full well that Chicago will come out hitting and crashing the net, two things they didn't do nearly enough in Game 1. The Sedins need to play more, especially if the Blackhawks don't come out hitting everything that moves. Their lack of ice time was likely due to a lack of powerplay opportunities, but Vigneault can't use that as a reason to "balance" the ice time. The Sedins can shift the pace of the game and can lock up key minutes in the offensive zones. That was one area where the Blackhawks started to cause some real pressure in the 2nd and 3rd periods. The Blackhawks had noticeably more time in the offensive zone than the Canucks did. I have to think that if the Sedins were out more often and got their patented cycle working, they could have wrapped up that game a lot earlier.
The Three Keys
Here are the three keys for the Vancouver Canucks tonight:
1. Keep up the physical play on Patrick Kane. He was bullied all night, mostly by Hamhuis and it kept Kane out of the game for the most part. Given that Kane's initial linemates (Smith and Frolik) aren't exactly huge offensive threats, isolating Kane and eliminating him for offensive opportunities will be key. It turns the Blackhawks into a one-line team, from the standpoint of being a true offensive threat. It also forced Quenneville to start moving his lines around, moving Kane with Toews and Sharp and bumping Hossa down. Keep up the isolation on Kane and force Quenneville to go into line juggling mode.
2. Quit line matching. The Canucks have the horses and the deep defense to play against the Blackhawks in any scenario at all positions. The Canucks need to be the ones setting the tone and force Quenneville to get the matchups HE wants. Quenneville is a matchup guru, but the Canucks are deeper and have more scoring balance through their 4 lines.
3. Work both creases. The Canucks need to keep up their aggressive play in the Blackhawks crease area, and continue to keep the Blackhawks from going big-ass-Byfuglien in front of Luongo. The Canucks were pretty good at both during game 1 but could be better. And if they want to finally go up 2-0 on the Blackhawks, they need to be even more prickish than they were in Game 1.
The Links
Here are your top 5 links for today's game:
1. Tale of the Tape: Blackhawks @ Canucks (Canucks.com)
2. Just shut up and play the game — it's working for Max Lapierre (The Province)
3. Blackhawks aim to flip the switch … but can they? (Vancouver Sun)
4. Canucks expect Chicago's best in Game 2 (CBC Sports)
5. Roberto Luongo Is, Like, Seriously Good (Blackhawks Down Low) << SEE WHAT THE ENEMY HAS TO SAY! ***
April 15 2011, 01:39PM
Seriously they call their website Blackhawks Down Low, why not just drop the word "Low" or better yet add a couple prepositions, Blackhawks "on the" Down Low. Really the only down low for the Blackhawks is their position in the standings.


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Narrow Gauge Figure 8 Set
- Color:
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Qty: 1
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- Coal Loader
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- Recommended for ages 3 and up
Material: Plastic, Wood
Brand: TOMY


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"Because I say so."
Sorry, Mom, your answer to our childhood questions won't work anymore. From fridge care to cooking and doing dishes and laundry, the experts at Reviewed.com get into the Mother's Day spirit and debunk the lies that have ruled your domestic life for years.
REVIEWED.COM: Lies your mother told you about cooking
REVIEWED.COM: Lies your mother told you about doing the laundry
REVIEWED.COM: Lies your mother told you about doing the dishes
Here are some facts:
1. Alcohol loses its potency during cooking.
Lie. A study by the University of Idaho and the U.S. Department of Agriculture's Nutrient Data Laboratory has revealed that up to 85% of original alcohol content can linger after cooking. To remove all traces of alcohol, food must be cooked for more than 3 hours.
2. You should only eat well-done pork.
Wrong! Though it was a real rule until very recently, the USDA now recommends that pork be cooked to an internal temperature of 145°F, which is low enough for a nice medium doneness.
3. Adding oil to pasta prevents sticking.
Yes, fine, true. But you don't necessarily want that. Oil makes the pasta so slippery that all of the delicious sauce can't adhere to it. Omit the oil and just stir your pasta. Then, once it's done, ladle in a little sauce to avoid clumps.
1. More detergent is better.
Sorry to those who have been wasting precious money on extra-large detergent dumps. Most modern washing machines use a mechanism called "load sense," which weighs your load of clothes and estimates its volume to calculate how much water to dispense. Pour too much detergent? Get ready for soapy residue.
2. Hair spray is good at removing ink from clothes.
Yes, but there's a better way. It's the alcohol in hair spray that removes the stains. You'd have better luck pouring vodka directly on ink stains.
3. Dry cleaning is dry.
This is so intuitive! It's in the name! It's also wrong. The process uses no water, but it actually uses quite a bit of fluids — usually tetrachloroethene or perchloroethylene (aka PERC).
1. You should pre-wash everything.
Lie. Current dishwasher detergents use enzymes that react with food particles, literally eating them away. Reviewed.com neither scrapes the plates beforehand nor pre-washes them in its lab tests, and most dishwashers easily remove meat, egg and milk stains that we've baked on and left there for 24 hours. So there. Laziness: 1. Mom: 0. Just keep in mind that your dishwasher is not a garbage disposal.
2. You shouldn't wash plastics.
Half-true. If your Tupperware or plastic silverware says "dishwasher-safe," then you're good. And make sure you're loading them on the top rack, as far from the machine's heating element as possible.
3. You can put knives in the dishwasher.
If you want your knives to actually do their job, don't put them in the dishwasher. It exposes knives to high heat, detergent and contact with other utensils, which can all dull the blade. To keep the edge keen, make sure you're washing it by hand, then immediately drying with a towel.
Contributing: Lindsay Deutsch, USA TODAY Network


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Baby Bathing
How to play Baby Bathing
Click the tap to fill the bath. Drag the baby into the bath. Click the brush to select a different colour for the bath, and select the crayon to colour the rug. Use soaps and shampoos from the cupboard to wash the baby. When the baby is ready, take it out of the bath, make it smell nice and brush and/or blow-dry its hair. Click the hanger to try on the different outfits.
This bubbly baby loves to bathe, to splash around in the bath and to get ready for a festive day.
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After some more testing on the beta, I have changed some of my thoughts on glyphs and talent choices. Like I mentioned at the top of my guide, this is not near finished and I am working as fast as I can on changing/rewriting things.
I am so pleased that you found my guide and even commented, you are the person who led me to make a priest and I am thankful for that. Secondly, I would like to thank you for showing me some of the flaws in my "talent" guide. As a writer yourself, you should know that sometimes you do not think of things at first that would render something else you wrote incorrect or flawed in any way. So thanks for pointing that out! Also, thanks for letting me know that some of my logic was wrong and that I needed to show more evidence to prove some of my points. I am working on my "stat weights" section right now and hopefully it will be up soon ( I am not very good at math, so it is taking me some time...). But Thanks again!


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New WoD models
Blizzard recently updated the World of Warcraft: Warlords of Draenor model viewer, with the female gnome and male tauren model. Blizzard writes
"Our character artists strived to recapture the charm of the classic models while taking advantage of the expressiveness of their fluid new animations to bring new life to these beloved characters. We hope you like the new looks as much as we enjoyed making them."
Looking pretty good if you ask me. What do you think about the upcoming WoW expansion? Will you buy and play it?
Link to the WoW model viewer:


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Style # 202078
Suiting done right! With a sharp collarless neckline, chic ruffled hem and body-contouring cut, this bebe blazer jacket is sure to chic up your 9 to 5. Fully lined. Double hook clasp at center. Pair them with a contrasting skirt and classic black pumps or go off-duty in metallic sandals and denim. Sleeve length: 25"/64 cm with opening: 10"/25 cm. Center back to hem: 21"/53 cm.
- 48% cotton, 45% leatherette, 7% elastane
- Machine wash
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BOSTON – Massachusetts saw 566 completed foreclosures in August, the lowest monthly level to date in 2012, The Warren Group said last week.
August also marked the third consecutive month of year-over-year, foreclosure-deed decreases. It was also the fewest number of completed foreclosures in any month since February 2011, when there were 521 foreclosure deeds statewide.
Foreclosure deeds dropped 40 percent, from 947, in August 2011. In total, 5,975 foreclosure deeds have been filed in Massachusetts in 2012. That figure represented an 8.4 percent increase compared to 5,511 deeds recorded during the same period last year.
Year over year, foreclosure petitions rose slightly in August, increasing 4.2 percent to 1,456 from 1,397 in August 2011. Petitions have increased every month so far this year, except in July when starts dropped 16.8 percent year over year. A total of 12,079 foreclosure petitions have been initiated so far this year, up 46 percent from 8,253 petitions filed the same period last year, The Warren Group said. •
Monday, February 20
Yesterday at 2:45 PM
Yesterday at 11:47 AM
Thursday, February 23


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|Posted by Lynn on October 03, 2002 at 21:21:23:
We are having a new home built, (in Redmond, OR) and with the contractor had originally decided on copper pipes. The plumber mistakenly has installed blue and red pipes so far and I am trying to find out if we should just go with this instead of copper. I found on the red QEST PEX so they are evidently a PEX product. The plumber told our contractor that they were made by RTI. I feel that we should stick with the PEX for this area the more I read about this. What is your opinion? Thanks so much.
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Round table on using modern technologies to raise efficiency and security of Customs Transit procedures (Geneva, 13 June 2013)
The United Nations Economic Commission for Europe (UNECE) organizes a round table on using modern technologies to raise efficiency and security of Customs Transit procedures. This round table will take place at Room V, Palais des Nations, Geneva, on 13 June 2013, and is organized in the framework of the 134th session of the UNECE Working Party on Customs Questions affecting Transport (WP.30) (11-14 June 2013).
The Working Party prepares, reviews, modifies and administers a large number of United Nations Conventions and Agreements in the field of Border Crossing facilitation and Customs Transit procedures. One of these Conventions is the Customs Convention on the International Transport of Goods under Cover of TIR Carnets (TIR Convention, 1975), one of the most successful international transport Conventions and the only universal Customs transit system in existence.
The round table aims at improving the awareness and knowledge about modern technologies that can be used in Customs Transit Systems. Modern technologies can facilitate border crossing procedures while increasing security.
Given the importance of the debate at the round table your personal participation would be most appreciated. We believe that the event will offer a unique opportunity to meet government officials, private sector, NGO's and academia representatives and those who are the decisions makers for the modernization of the TIR Convention.
The round table is open to representatives of the transport industry.
The round table will include presentations by experts from various international organizations, NGO's, private companies as well as by representatives of countries.
More details can be found in the provisional programme.
Should you require more information, please contact the UNECE secretariat:
Telephone: +41 (0) 22 917 15 31
Fax: +41 (0) 22 917 00 39
Presentation 1
Presentation 2
Presentation 3
Presentation 4
Presentation 5
Presentation 6
Presentation 7
Presentation 8
Presentation 9
Presentation 10
Presentation 11


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Attention GDD Colorado massive!!! After the sell-out Steve Aoki show in Boulder we've teamed up alongside RedEye Presents and Got Bass to bring back to back nights to Colorado with two of the fastest rising stars in dubstep and heavy bass: Calvertron and Figure on Wednesday, May 4th in Fort Collins and Thursday, May 5th in Denver. Calvertron has reinvented himself from his fidget house days by taking on an entirely new sound. Dubstep, drum n bass, and wonky basslines fuse to dominate the Beatport charts and leave fans screaming for more. Figure on the other hand has cemented himself as one of the leaders in the drumstep and heavy bass scene, churning out new releases every few weeks that have earned the raving support from heavy hitters on all sides with Skrillex, Datsik, Diplo, and Reid Speed rinsing his tunes in their sets over the past few months.
(If you needed any more proof these guys are smashing the game, take a look at Beatport right now and you'll see Figure has the #1, #3, and #5 spot in the drum n bass charts while Calvertron has the #2, #4, #7 spots in the Dubstep charts. Not too shabby. For any basshead, these are not shows to be missed.)
• Figure – Aliens (Original Mix)
Wednesday May 4th @ The Aggie Theatre (Fort Collins, CO)
+ support from Seth Abrumz, DJ Guam, and Rob Bass
Adv: $12 // Door: $15 // 16+ to enter
Thursday May 5th @ Cervantes Other Side (Denver, CO)
+ support from Vinnie Maniscalco, Digital Connection, and Fluffy G
Adv: $13 // Door: $15 // 16+ to enter


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First Summer SOAR
by gwilson on Jun.20, 2009, under Uncategorized
The first of three Summer Orientation And Registration (SOAR) sessions is coming up this week. Over 120 incoming freshmen will come to campus Thursday for two days of introduction to McMurry's freshman culture, meeting with faculty associated with their chosen majors, and signing up for courses. About 10% of those students will be Biology Department majors. For them, the decisions on course selection will be among three typical freshman sequences: Anatomy & Physiology I for Nursing and Life Science majors; Botany (and possibly Unicellular Organisms) for Biology majors, and Introduction to Scientific Research (and possibly Unicellular Organisms) for BIMS majors.
Those with an interest in a pre-professional field (medicine, dentistry, physical therapy, pharmacy, etc.) will sign up for a new pre-health professions seminar to introduce them to the expectations of professional schools and give them practical experience in doing those things that make a student competitive for the admissions process. Our incoming BIMS students will take Introduction to Scientific Research (ISR) to hone their critical thinking skills as they learn to look at the world, ask important questions, and design experiments to find answers. It is a new world for those whose high school science courses were pretty much "same old, same old" approaches to science. As I've explained in earlier posts, BIMS is a refreshingly new approach to teaching science that whets the appetite and engages the mind to learn how life works in new and lasting ways.
More on SOAR in the weeks to come.