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The insights and comments from our readers on the issue of forgiveness and letting go are clearly from the heart. In my simple view, forgiveness is an act of caring for myself. When you've been hurt by someone, it can take an almost superhuman effort to move forward. But I've learned that if I dwell on that past event, I'm surrendering and giving over my serenity and peace of mind. That's not a wise thing to do.
Of course, we want to others to embrace accountability and repentance, but we can't make that happen. And if amends aren't forthcoming, it's best for us to move on. As the scripture says, "Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words, go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet."
As you can see, I'm struggling with this concept. Please weigh in with your perspective on this difficult topic.
Edward T. Creagan, M.D.
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in short from my personal journey as a believer to not forgive is to deny the power of Christ Jesus death on the cross and His resurrection.
This is very touchy. I really learned my new lesson, and I hope that I CAN use this in my real life!
You Cannot Change the past, but You can Change, How You think about it!
Anger and vengence only does damage to the angry, vengeful person, it boils the brain chemistry, and makes all decisions impulsive, in Thought, Word, and Deed!
You do not have to forgive, Face to Face, but only in your mind, just keep forgiving the person over and over, Rise above everyone else, become Magnanamous, Forgive Him, or Her, and also most important, Forgive yourself, for any part you may have had in contributing toward the event, and keep forgiving, over, and over, until in your mind, you can pass the person on the street, and say good morning, with none of the old emotions, leave them behind, and begin your new happy life!
You Deserve to enjoyn a Calm Serene, Relaxed Future, and You can Do it, you are better than most people, You are Magnanamous, and can look down on those that have hurt or harmed you, or your loved one, and be graceful, and forgive them, and don't forget to forgive yourself!
Enjoy you new life!
This process does not Manage Anger, but Removes it , and Anger is the most dangerous emotion, that we have, "Anger only does damage to the angry person"
Thanks for the words of wisdom!
Forgiveness is a daily process. It starts with recognizing your part in the situation without blame, shame or guilt. Stick to the facts of the matter and realize there are two sides. Forgiving yourself for your part starts the process as a whole.
Forgiving the other person as well as yourself comes in layers. This is why it is important to forgive daily or whenever feelings of resentment, anger, anxiousness or rage come up. Whatever excersise you choose must be practiced whenever these feeling emerge. Feelings come up and out to be healed, if we fuel them with more negative thoughts they will grow, if we tame them with the act of forgiveness they eventually dissipate into compassion & love. The act or situation may never leave your memory but the emotion behind it dissipates and we find profound wisdome, inner peace & tranquility. Most importantly, it is your commitment to yourself to forgive daily. Your commitment to your peace, as well as compassionaly allowing others to figure out their own journey. We all hear that peace starts from within, a very true statement. Unfortunately there is not an instant resolution of forgiveness rather one of a most amazing & rewarding path that becomes a part of our lives instead of a task. it gets easier as we practice and go along. It will still be painful at times but a quicker resolution when practiced daily. In writing this I have found forgiveness in a situation that came up for me. Daily practice.. Compassion, Love &
I was going through a difficult crisis some years ago in which I had been terribly wronged and hurt by my spouse's infidelity. Someone whose advice I sought told me a story about forgiveness.
The story: "Suppose your lifelong best friend, Joe, and you go into business together. For over twenty year, the business goes well and your friendship with Joe continues to thrive. Then, with no warning, Joe and your wife disappear together, taking all of the money from the business. All that you truly valued is gone. And, you, of course, do not forgive Joe and spend the next 10 years deeply resenting him. Then, one day you run into someone who you know to be a friend of Joe. So, you ask him, "How is Joe doing?" He replies that, "Oh, you must not have heard. Joe died 9 years ago."
On hearing this, it immediately opened my mind to the idea that we refuse to forgive others because we think that somehow our refusal is punishing those people. But, Joe had been dead for 9 years so he certainly could not have been punished by the refusal to forgive him. The more I thought I realized that most people don't even know we haven't forgiven them. In very close relationships, it is more complex but even then, I have found that forgiving others releases me. It frees me from the hold I have been giving to the person whom I have refused to forgive. Forgiving another, no matter what the circumstances, is truly a gift to myself.
I used this in a homily.
This is some of the finest wisdom that I have ever encountered!
May all forgive me of my for my lack of wisdom.
My husband recently had (and may still be having) an emotional affair with the ame woman he had an emotional affair with 18 years ago. I really have no idea if the affair just started up again or never stopped during all that time. I found suggestive/flirtatious text messages, dates, sudden interests that my husband had never had before right before Christmas. The text messages were intimate, and discussed our marriage relationship. It has been almost 6 months now and I still cannot forgive him. WHile asking him numerous times for information, he became more verbally abusive, spitting in my face, callling ME a whore ( ironic since I've been faithful for 35 years and HE'S the one who had the affair), a stupid bitch, he's picked up the ottoman and acted like he's going to throw it at me, put his fist up against my nose, shoved me down...I could go on, but he stops just short of actual hurting me physically....all because I ask him questions about why he went to her and why he couldn't come to me! I forgave the first time, I cannot seem to forgive this time. IT is affecting my health, lost weight, low white blood count, insomnia, and such anger and vengefulness that I never knew was even in me. NEither will be forthcoming with info and have deleted all texts that incriminated them. I can't find forgiveness in myself and I have tried so hard. I think our marriage is unsalvageable.
Forgiveness is so necessary and yet, so difficult! I have been divorced for 14 years. I left my abusive husband when my dau was in the womb. It was the hardest thing I ever did, because I was still in love with my husband. But he was angry and controlling, and everything seemed to be my fault. I had to leave to save my own and my children's lives. Forgiveness is my greatest challenge, 14 yrs later. He remarried and everything seems so "perfect" now. I know I did the right thing for my children's sanity, yet I still struggle with the impact it had on my children's lives. My son is 19 now, and moved in with dad at 14. (all through high school). Ever since that day, I have had a very limited and awkward relationship with him. This pains me DEEPLY. I wonder if I will ever mean anything to the young man I birthed. I feel like I was replaced by the new wife. I know it seems obsurd, but this is how it feels. I know she is a good stepmom to my children. Yet I feel she has no concept of the situation in which I left. Regardless, I really only want a relationship with my son and yet, it seems to becoming more and more remote.....
I recently found out that the wife I married to for almost 10 years cheated on me with another man about seven months ago. It involved both emotional and physical intimacy. We have two kids together and I am struggling to overcome the hate and anger in me. I know I was a factor that contributed to what she did but by not insisting on working on our problem to bringing in the third party, just make me so devastated. I trusted her completly and never questioned her until i stumbled upon their messages.
I want to try to work out our marriage but it seems like she is adamant about how she was treated over the past 10 years. i cant see her remorse in it though she had apologized and admitted that her action was wrong. I am trying to forgive but is it way more painful that I think. Only time now will tell.
I need help forgiving a co-worker whom had a major part in the loss of my job. I feel hurt,vengeful and would like but find it hard when I can't find a job partly due to the economy and alot to do with how I was fired. I do take responsibilty in my part in this matter but totally fucked over by this person. They have no idea how stressful that it's been not being able to pay my bills.You find out whom your true friends are and I've learned alot about myself but if I had some financial stability, it'd be alot easier to forgive this person and move on. To forgive is very powerful and need advice to regain my power and forgive this person.
I am so bitter about losing my job and the unfairness that came with it. It has totally turned my life upside down. Instead of getting ready for retirement, I have to start over. My side of the story never got told. I do not know how to let go of this bitterness. I did not deserve to lose my job.....I was in full blown menapause, and hated everything and everybody...
I hate this person and I can't forgive, I must want to because I'm told it's the only way I can move on but I just can't because the hate and revenge feelings are to strong. I can't be the only person who feels this way, my mind gos over and over thinking of ways to hurt this person ( who by the way to anyone that reads this it is not an ex partner or even friend but a long term boss), I am just afraid of my own emotions and what I have let this person do to me how it has affected my life and the people in my life, I no I shall self destruct if I'm not able to find a solution :(
It's wondreufl to have you on our side, haha!
This forum needed shnkaig up and you've just done that. Great post!
You write so hoesnlty about this. Thanks for sharing!
This piece was a lifejckaet that saved me from drowning.
I have unintentionally caused pain to my love due to which he broke up with me. I have admitted my mistakes and apologized many times, but the response is still negative. He does not want me in his life. I regret making those mistakes and now I have forgiven him and myself (I think) but the love is still lost. Not sure how to come out of it.
I have read many posts and need to say my piece. Forgiveness is so important, but can only come from the heart when we accept ourselves and our responsibility for our happiness. This is tied closely to our expectations of others and many people do not articulate what they expect from their partner, either to themselves, let alone the partner. Mentioned below someone mentioned their husband didn't protect them, but does the husband know this? I have seen so many family relationships disintegrate and both sides telling everyone else what they expect but not the other family member. Please, learn to talk, to all those you cherish, and when they put a foot wrong, ask why. Some people are oblivious to causing offense, and devastated when they find out they have upset someone. If you can do some of that, then the forgiveness will become easier. Equally, learn to forgive yourself first. And when you do, the will be a lightness of being!
Thoughts on forgiveness being a gift you give yourself.
Most of our forgiveness issues are centered around those with whom we have close relationships....therefore lack of forgiveness impacts our lives profoundly, because we experience stress around those people, thinking about those people and even when someone brings up their name. I made up a word for forgiveness, "forpentence", because when I came to understand, at a heart level, that I had to not only forgive(that was not as much of an issue), but more importantly, I had to feel the effect of the pain I had cause the other person. This was not in any teaching I had read. All I had heard was, you must forgive, but that did not seem to change how I felt. One day I had an encounter with the unforgiven and within ten minutes I realized the unforgiven was ME. This was experienced at a deep emotional level and my heart became soft and gentleness filled my soul and I forgave....past, present and future. The relationship had been "purified" in a way that altered the course of my life. Forgiveness, for me, is about forpentence...going to the one with whom we have unresolved pain, and recognizing we are the one who must do the work. The person with whom I had the encounter was not able bring his issues to the table, however our relationship changed and we had a bond that allowed us to be friends until he passed away. We do not have to like the behavior to accept the person. It produces the freedom to in
I'm not offering advice. I'm asking for it, and sharing what I've learned. Forgiveness is often addressed in terms of dealing with hurts caused by the actions of those you love. But how about this? Often, the one we need to forgive is NOT a loved one. They are often someone that we despise. Not an I love yet hate you relationship, simply an I despise you situation. Who do I despise? The co-worker who sloughs off her work on me and leaves work knowing that I will stay until it is done. My anger stems from a combination of sadness and grief. Say what? Yes, I grieve my loss of family time. I am sad that I am unable to detach from the work environment. I seem unable to leave it undone knowing it will cause problems if it is not done timely. When a person I love hurt me, I had a desire to forgive that person. I've been pretty successful in doing so, even though old hurts do re-emerge from timt to time. Forgiveness takes work. It starts with a decision (to forgive) and continues as a process. Forgiving someone that I don't like promises to be even harder than forgiving someone I love. Why do I need to forgive her (co-worker)? My life will be better. My anger is simply a tool that she uses against me. She plays the sympathy card with people. "I've got a pacemaker, I've got a brain tumor, I've had pituitary cancer, my husband left me, my cat died, blah, blah," It leaves me cold. I feel anger that my family, my time my life may be slipping out the door. How do I forgive
Sometimes, I feel like I mean nothing to my friends. I might drive 100 miles for them, steal for them, cheat for them and what do I receive? Nothing.Last night, when I was forced to be separated from them at a concert I had to run to the restroom because I nearly broke down on the spot. Sometimes, I might even question if they are the right people to be around at all. But in the end, when looking back at all the GOOD things we have done-first shopping trip ever, birthdays, travels- I know I'm grateful for every moment. I've had some of my greatest milestones in their presence and help like my first dance with a guy, and I know there will be more up the road. I'm still very frustrated about last night, not just for the money wasted but the disappointment.I almost feel like confronting them this time instead. But at 17 I know I don't know everything, and whatever I might say tomorrow could affect me for the rest of life. Maybe there are no regrets, just lessons learned but some lessons are harder than others. I don't know. In the end all I sincerely do want is just what's best, FORGIVENESS. It's going to take a little while to get there but for every bit of bad there's been a ton of good. The act of leaving this comment alone is relieving the stress. I can sleep a little better now. Whatever happens, happens even if it doesn't seem meant to be. For now I am trying my very hardest to put on a sunny outlook and look on the bright side.
Forgiveness and Grieving
Grieving is a process through which we come to terms with the pain & loss we feel People use resentment & anger as a sheild to push back the sorrow pain the shame we feel. Shame is often overlooked when dealing with ones hurts and needs to forgive.Shame exposes our inner most self, we feel vulnerable. We are most vulnerable when we think we need the esteem of others to be validated as a person.Scott Peck inhis book, "The Road Less Traveled" makes the distinction between one who is esteemed based & at the mercy of others, and one who accepts & love his/her self. Loving ones self is nor narcissim; narcsicists really don't love theirselves). Self love is accepting and respecting the self one is. Doing this frees to grieve & release ourselves from whoever and whatever has wronged us. Stuck? Unable to forgive? a good therapist can help!
I spent five years in therapy working through my abusive childhood; at one point I couldn't believe what I was recalling. If not for the confirmation of one of my siblings, and that of a neighbor, I would have thought I was crazy!
The greatest lesson my therapist taught me: "The healing is not complete until the forgiveness is done."
We forgive to heal ourselves, if it leads others to healing so be it - -if not, we aren't responsable for the otherperson(s)choice to stay ill. We forgive to free & heal ourselves. That is good.
By the way, until I forgave my parent
When we don't forgive, we harbor resentments and grudges that effect our nervous and endocrine systems. The so called "flight or flight hormones wreck havoc on our bodies and we live in a constant state of low intensity war. This lifestyle weakens our immune systems, making us vulnefrable to a host of disease processes. It can cause amisreable life or an untimely death.
There are a host of reasons folks do not forgive, and in my work and life experience I have noted what acall hte BIG 3.
Reason 1. We confuse forgiveness with saying its O.K. Forgiveness is anything but that. Forgiveness is letting go of an emotional anchor. Forgiving does not condone, or approve of a conduct. It does release YOU from bondage toward the one who has wronged you. You are ste free and you may well decide to have no further association with a particular person because they are toxic, addicted, or untrustworthy, and thats O.K.
Often what keeps us from forgiving is the second of the BIG 3- Resentment. The energy of resentment is wanting something we aren't going to get -and unsatisfied demand. The truth is that in many situations we may never receive the love, apology, recompense or contriteness we want, nor will we ver be able to retaliate in a manner that brings us satisfaction. We have to let go and put all the unrequited wants, desires for vengence and pain behind us. This brings us to thelast of the BIG 3 unwillingness to grieve. Grief is a process of letting go (continued)
I just read a few comments posted by women, it allowed me to refelct on how my wife might be feeling and struggling with. We have been together for over 12 years. I will admit it took me 2 years to finally get help, i stopped drinking and I have controled my anger, and I have never been abusive. But I am plagued with what I have done, my past feels as if the Grim Repper is following me. I more than anything would like my wife to forgive me, not only is it painful to see it consume her but painful for me to know she's having a hard time forgiving me. I thank God that I am a changed person and greatful that I am a better person. I would love nothing more than to live the rest of our lives happy and in love. For all to know, I AM TRULY SORRY FOR THE HURT, PAIN, ANGER THAT I HAVE CAUSED, JULIE PLEASE FORGIVE ME! Love Your Husband
Forgiving yourself and others starts with accepting the truth of who you are. It drops the barrier between you and your heart. If you can't face that truth about you, you likely can not accept that you deserve to be forgiven.
After almost 20 yrs and a long journey i find while I jave in some aspects forgiven my husband for years of verbal and at times physical abuse it has not released itself from my mind. I struggle when there r still times he lacks empathy and xompassio.. I find myself dissappointed. We have been through 10+ years of counseling. I have been at the bottom of the barrell and back to the top. I refuse to loose my self steem again. How do I move on...god has blessed me beyond belief...3 beautiful daughters....a beautiful home....the goodness the country provides...a wonderful job and church....but manu times I look at my husband and think how can i ever get past the pain to love u like I know any human needs to b loved. Like my parents love each other....I can't imagine living another 20 yes with him nor without him. He knows how i feel as well....:(
I find that compassion leads to forgiveness - almost automatically. True compassion - the recognition of pain and suffering in another - opens the heart to forgiveness. If we remember that "there but for fortune (or the Grace of God) go I" we can tap into our compassion and realize that sometimes we are caused pain when the action has nothing truly to do with us. We don't need to accept or trivialize the pain, or even understand from where it came; just the awareness that we all have pain and suffer can open that door.
Everyone is going to experience relationships that hurt them. The best solution is to make those emotional losses unimportant. The most vulnerable are those who have too few relationaships. If you have an ample number of relationships that work for you, then those that do not are not important and easy to forget and forgive if nessary. This may mean that you have to give your time to those that need it, and fret not for those that don't.
If I did not forgive the person who hurt me I would have been in an emotional hell ,but I chose to forgive him and move on
I was married for twenty three years and I thought that I was at my pinnacle of my life when my world came crashing down.
My husband told me that he never wanted me that he knew that I could have helped him get where he wanted to go in life house car and a decent way to earn a living,We had it all and he treated me like the very dust on the ground I was hurt deeply so I left him with every thing and started over at the age of 40.
To make a long story short i trusted God to be my comfort and he lifted me up so I could have forgiven my ex and turned around and nursed him when he was dying i took care of him till he died and even buried him
So please every one out there PLEASE forgive because it is the only way out of an emotional prison.Live ,love and be blessed
Forginess is like the truth that set one free from his or her past. till i was 31 i hard this ill-feeling for my late father who abundan my mother when she was pregnant with me, it was like i was chain at any time i hear his name or his name came to mind. the resentment toword my father was so hard i could not let go. this resulted in a behavoir that i describe as extreem reserved, and an awefull hate for every man on earth. I could not relate well and could not make much freinds,again any form of wrong against was met with wild antagonistic behavior. this continue till i understood and cought the revelation 'shake of the dust from off your feet at back of his house'- i cant carry the guilt of my father no more, i had to shake it off. yes and that was it, i am free now i have even named my second born atfer him, although i do not carry his name myself. its (forgiveness) one gift that i could give him.
i am struggling to forgive my husband. We have been married for 7 years. he has been faithful but not loyal. when his family would come against me, he never stood up for me. he always made excuses of why they did what they did and said the things they said. until finally o the day came when I exploded on him and his family and even his 2 kids. eventhough it wasn't their fault, I wanted his attention. all this years all i wanted was for him to 'protect' me. and he didn't.
This has been so stressful for me. I love my family and I know they would not purposely harm anyone. He feels differently. I know that we all were at fault for being overly intoxicated, that was the main factor. He says they attacked him and I remember bits and pieces of what happened and it didn't happen the way he said. I told him he needs to forgive so we can move forward. I forgave him for all the hurt and pain he put me through but he only cares about himself. He has not seen his child who is the main one suffering. He has also hurt me by being dishonest and sneaky before the incident. He never excepts responsibility for his actions and he is making my life miserable. He is living his life but angry that my siblings have moved on from the situation. I'm the one taking the fall for the situation and I did nothing. My siblings claim he deserved what happened and my sister had bruises. I am not perfect so please don't judge me. I am a God fearing woman and I know we all have to be accountable for our actions. I prayed for forgiveness from God and I am at peace. I pray that my boyfriend can forgive as well. I just want to move on from this nightmare.
I was deeply hurt emotionality by my boyfriend. He abandoned me when I was pregnant over five years ago. His excuse was we were not married nor a couple so he didn't feel the need to stand by my side. I forgave him and we ended up starting a relationship. Here is the problem, my family never forgot the pain I went through so it was really hard for them to except him because they felt he was going to hurt me again and that he was very selfish. However, the still welcomed him and he became apart of the family. My siblings still had underline issues with him. We all would go hang out together on many occasions. One particular night I am ashamed to say (but I need to be honest and get it out) drinking was involved and my sister and my boyfriend got into a physical altercation. My sister hit him in the head with a high heel shoe. My brother tried to stop the incident and my boyfriend tried to protect my sister as well as stop the mess. My boyfriend ended up driving drunk and crashed my truck. I was supposed to be in the truck but thank God I was not in the truck. My boyfriend was injured but he is okay now. he has a scar on his head above his eyebrow. He was so angry and wants revenge in the way of bodily harm. when he got out of the hospital he took me through so much to where I thought I would have a break down. I was not responsible but he didn't want to look at me. We love each other but he doesnt want me to talk to my family around him or even go anywhere with them.
Praying for the person who offended me & asking God, our heavenly Father, for my healing has helped to let go of much anger and resentments and bitterness.
I have been deeply wounded by many -- a dad who sexually, physically and emotionally abused me, a Mom who didn't protect me from the abuse, a family who denied the truth, friends who couldn't let go of their own judgments placing blame on me for their own actions. This is not a perfect world.
And yet faith, love, forgiveness and hope are a few of the gifts I have received from our good God who sacrificed his own Son on the cross so that I might have forgiveness! An awesome gift I have pondered for many years. I would not have done the same.
What a blessing to have that example of love, so different from my birth family. I benefit today from the love of my family of choice, my Christian friends and family who accept and love me for who I am -- God's precious, beloved child, such a treasure to Him he sent Jesus to heaven to prepare a place for me and all believers!
I wear a cross with Jesus shedding tears, running down his face feeling with and for me. What an exquisite representation of the cruelty I face and the loving empathy he offers.
Join the only real family and find an eternal support group! Ask God for forgiveness for your messes and mistakes and let him begin that miraculous inner transformation to be more like Jesus Christ.
You will never regret your action.
I believe that forgiveness can be learned at any point in life. Forgiveness can be shown in how you live your life. I am trying to take it one day at a time.
Two things to consider. (1) Forgiveness is a process, not a singular moment. The decision to forgive is the first step of a process that might take a very long time. (2) Decisional forgiveness is that first step, the choice to forgive and let go. Emotional forgiveness is the end result of the process, when you actually feel the benefit of forgiveness.
We often use unforgiveness to keep ourselves safely distanced from hurt. That's not necessarily a wrong thing, but long-held unforgiveness can have painful consequences, emotionally and physically. By exercising decisional forgiveness, we put ourselves back in the "driver's seat" of the process of forgiving, and then can move toward emotional forgiveness at our own pace.
Jesus has been cited in the conversation. When Peter asked Jesus how often we are to forgive, Jesus told him 70 times 7. In Jesus' time and culture, that was like saying, "as long, or as often, as it takes."
I thank you all for your insight on forgiveness. I must be very honest, I actually did not know the true meaning of forgiveness. As I sat down for dinner, my husband apologized over and over and asked for my forgiveness. I never responded. I didnt repond because I truly didnt know how to forgive. So, I decided to google forgiveness and stumbled on this page. It was meant. I now realize that if I can just forgive, these angry feelings and vengeful feelings will go away. Im going to make an attempt to forgive him, not because he asked, but because I want to be FREE! I deserve it!
Forgiveness seems to come down to 'giving' rights back to the one I feel so angry toward--rather than 'giving' another injury, only this time to HIM, I elect to 'acknowledge his right to choose' his own behaviors without imposing my judgments on his choices. I was furious he behaved badly because we treated him well when he was a boy; his dad and I doted on him, as did his brothers. He was everybody's Golden Boy. That was then and this is now; it doesn't mean I get to judge [read: control] how he treats his son. I think I'd have handled it differently [read: better]. Fact is, he gets to raise his own children.
More important, I wasn't there -- my information is second-hand and was provided by someone very angry with Chris at the time. I'm weary of being angry, don't want to live like this, and choose not to hold onto my strong disapproval that was gained from, possibly, a biased source. Even if it were so, he still gets to raise his own children without guidance from me.
So I'm releasing him and me from the Hell I created with painful anger; am seeing a professional well equipped to teach me better coping skills; and hope to be better prepared the next time that capital A Anger rears its head.
When trust is violated and you begin to see what is happening..she denied what her actions were saying. I thought she was my friend. She had my secrects, thoughts, ideas and she used them against me, and she has a boyfriend and other men in her life she did not have to do this to me...I know I am not the first woman to be betrayed by her friend but I am having trouble forgiving her...he just happens to be there...anyone man I would have been involved with.. it would have been him.She has to have them all. I just didn't see that in her. As I look back (20/20rule) I see things. Maybe I should realize that she is sick and definitely needs forgiveness and understanding but I am having a very hard time finding peace with this. Neither one will ever admit to this...she is just so transparent with the guilty actions. I try to keep positive thoughts in my mind but sometimes I go back and the hurt is there again. My heart is truly hurt.
When I was a newlywed, my two sisters were still in grade school and junior high. My mother left them and father for a different marriage. My youngest sister was devastated, and now nearing 60 years old, still cannot forgive my mother, who has been dead a year. She is so bitter and constantly fighting depression. Our middle sister moved on long ago, and neither of us knows how to help our "little sis." I know that forgiveness has to be a decision that only the hurt individual can make. She's carried this heartache for over 50 years! When will she put this burden down? Mother, who died with Alzheimer's, was plagued with what she did and was constantly asking the question, "Was I a good mother?" I said to mother, "Not always, Mom, but no one is perfect. You did the best you could."
I am working on forgiving my husband's family for sneaking into the hospital 8 days before my father in law died and having him change his trust in the ICU. I had known and loved these people for over 30 years.
The hurt and anger this has caused has certainly taken a toll on me and my family. My husband had prostate cancer, and I believe stress had a hand in it. The worst part is, we still have to have dealings with them, and I have to learn how to keep them out of my life and not let bitterness destroy me.
As a Christian, I have certainly not always behaved in a Christ-like manner concerning them. But, I am learning that when I speak badly of them, I am only making myself look bad, and Proverbs says that if I feed my enemy, I will be heaping burning coals on his head. So, I am making it my mission to try and forgive them, and not speak of them. Then, they have no power over me, or my life.
to the man who said this Dr was being unprofessional by posting a Christian comment-.. the bible validates science( not the other way around) and God is the author of forgiveness and loveand it has been scientifically proven that applying the truth of the Word of God brings healing, considering that most doctors will tell you 80% of all disease is 'psychosomatic'or spiritually rooted.If that offends you, go live i na non Christian country.
The story of Jesus is really the story of forgiveness. When we are caught up in our earthly lives, it can be a monumental task to overcome the hurt. Believing in an immortal spirit makes it easier.
There are times when I try to suppress the hurt by ignoring the situation and moving on with my life. Pride is deceitful to the truth! You may have heard the old say: Pride comes before destruction. It's true, it's self-destruction that is. Anytime we think about the situation (or pops into your mind). That's your conscious letting you know it's time to forgive.
Some view forgiveness as a weakness; yet, it's actually a strength. Forgiveness is a selfish act. When thinking about forgiveness, you are asking yourself to release any grudges, guilt, shame or hurt from your life. Sometimes we place more attention on how others will respond to the act of our forgiveness. The reality is that we cannot "control" how others think of us. Truthfully, the other person has already formed negative thoughts/impression about us anyway. It's important to focus on how forgiveness will bring healing to you. If the other person decides at that same moment to heal then that's an added bonus. However, you are not responsible for their thoughts and behavior-only yours. Forgive and then you can truly move on with life liberated.
If you can agree with what Jesus said on the cross,"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do", it will help with forgiveness. If you prefer scientific evidence,if can be found in Simon Baron-Cohen's book, "Zero Degrees Of Empathy",which sets out to explain differences in brain circuitry.
It may also help to be grateful that the Director has not cast you in the role of villain in the divine drama,and that, even though it is very difficult,there is an oppurtunity here for spiritual evolution, and you may eventually find that you are also grateful to your oppressor for helping you, if you are on a quest to "Know Thyself"
Do good unto those who would hurt you, pray for those who would use you. Turn the other cheek. The Christ was very special, how can we every apply that stuff when someone hurts us? This same guy turned over the tables and threw the money changers out of the temple in anger. We don't have to be nice to everyone. For the little things we need to forgive and move on with others. For some of the stuff I have read we can forgive ourselves for being justifibaly angry and commiting to move on. I could never forgive someone for hurting a child, it is just too evil. I could look at them in a different light. They are animals. Animals could attack your baby and you would be angry but you could maybe see they were just acting like animals. Some people have not reached "human" intelligence even though they have the same bodies as those who have it. These people need to be in a cage and others need to be protected from them. If they do really, really bad stuff then they should be "put down."
You don't have to be around people that are evil. It is OK to stay away, and forgive them for being animals and not knowing what they are doing, but you don't have to put yourself around those animals in the future.
Its an analogy but I think it is the seed of getting to find a way to understand the blatant evil in the world. There is a book called Rays of the Dawn by Dr. Thurman Fleet that has a whole chapter on Forgiveness that was helpful to me.
thank you very much!!!!
It's hard to forgive without some love or caring feelings ever between people. I would ask your mother why would she ever say such hurtful things that aren't true. What is going on in her depressed mind? It has nothing to do with you. She is just a tormented person lashing out at whoever is in her life. Forgive her for that and know she is the one who is wasting your relationship. My father never asked forgiveness because he just told me he thought I must know how sorry he was, and that he was so ashamed he couldn't even bring himself to talk about it. He doesn't have many years left now and we could have had a real relationship if he had been brave. My payback was to barely see him for the rest of his life. He only admitted how he felt after I told him how I needed him to apologize and that I forgave him. I wish I had done it 25 years ago but I think most people never get the courage. When you are ready, it is a great gift to give yourself. He was angry at first for me finally talking about it over the phone but after I told him I forgave him something happened. He forgave himself. I was always afraid of his anger but now I realize he was only angry at himself.
When someone has told you you are no good for nothing and never will be and that person is the one who bore you then what do you do with that? That spoken over me has turned out to be prophetic. What did I ever do to deserve that?
Our family was/is a Christian compassionate loving naive closeknit group composed of a tough father nurturing mom and 7 children. I am the middle sister of the 7. Our 2 youngest brothers were sexually abused for years by our oldest sister's husband of 35 yrs. The abuse went on without our knowledge. My brothers changed overnight when it started. We didn't understand the change. Prior to the horrific abuse, they were sweet, helpful and playful 8 and 13 year olds. As the abuse started and continued, they became withdrawn anxious sad angry. 2 years ago our family took action by confronting the brother-in-law. It was a time of living hell due to the fact that the bro-in-law refused to tell the truth but replaced the truth with lies and accusations of our brothers. Forgiveness has been very difficult given the fact that he refuses to meet with us or share any sorrow or remorse for his inhumane abuse. As a family we have stuck with our brothers through the whole process of disclosure and continue to support them. My sister and her husband have left the family due to our requesting the bro-in-law not return. She left with him and hasn't returned. Our family has had self-therapy, talking frequently throughout the week. At first, the conversations were full of rage. That has been replaced by an understanding that the abuser can do no harm to anyone anymore b/c the sheriff has been notified, keeping tabs on him. We look to Jesus for healing hope forgiveness. Divine Work and Praise Him!
The most hurtful thing my "mother" ever said to me was "I've forgiven myself for the things that have happened."
There is a time and a place for everything. We all indeed have the same human and spiritual needs. Our needs must be met in order though. When I was a child, I didn't care about my GPA as much as I craved my mother's attention. As a father now, I begin to understand my own father and mother. As the course of life develops one day at a time, so does our awareness of our true needs. So what are those needs then? Well surely phisiological, for we cannot sustain biological life without food, water and oxygen. But to live and to survive are not the same thing. For once we are aware of our existance through daily survival we desire more. So what is that more? LOVE. What is love? Well to shorten it, love is the ultimate good, freely given with no ulterior motive of any kind except to bring forth true goodness to you and others. ALL TRUE LOVE LEADS TO THE SOURCE OF SUCH CONCEPT. Why do we all (most anyways) desire to have a girlfriend/boyfriend and eventually to marry? Sure there are some who say "I don't need to sign a paper to show you I love you." They are right. But to make a promise to that one who you love that you will remain faithful, that you will support her in tough times, that you are not going to bail out on him when he needs you the most... that transcends more than a signature. No one has greater love than (s)he who gives it all for all. But that in itself is a journey, a journey of love (life). He who truly loves can forgive it all, for love endures, hopes a
I struggle very hard with the concept of forgiveness and yet understand that it is only through forgiveness that there will be any peace. I have been angry for many years at something someone both did to me and something I did to myself and had to pay high consequences. In trying to understand it, I think I need to learn that people are only people and we have to be very careful who we trust and if we trust the wrong people, there is that sense of betrayal, but maybe we shouldn't have trusted them in the first place. So I go back to that place of being disappointed in them and disappointed in myself for trusting them, but they are only people and they come from their own faulty perspectives and biases, so maybe that is what I need to learn and understand. But what I do know is that the state of unforgiveness is hurting me far more than it is hurting them, so we do forgive as an act of compassion for ourselves. Maybe we can only see and shake our heads at their parts in it and how sick they were then go on to make things better for ourselves. No one has a right to tell us we are second best, because we are not. Somehow forgiveness of them seems to give us the strength to go on. It is critical to have compassion for ourselves and not continue to hurt ourselves which someone else might have started.
Thank you from me too Colleen, a very helpful insight.
Thank you, Colleen. Yours is the most helpful answer I have seen on forgiveness.
Easier said than done! When you have horrible images and thoughts run through your mind of a wife and several lovers doing what you considered special to the two of you one doesn't just drop it. Sorry, folks, it just ain't that easy. Want to, trying hard to but can't seem to make it. I believe some things are not ever forgotten and therefor never gotten over. The only hope we have is to try to manage the thoughts and try to get active and involved and busy as as all get out with other things so the thoughts and images don't control us. . . and that is still very hard to do. One other thing is for the offending spouse to pour out an over abundance of love and caring. If you have a good today you don't have to ponder on the awful past.
I have learned a life applying lesson from my counselor:
Forgiveness is a thought, not a behavior. Our egos feel insulted and we must forgive that insult. Who we must forgive is not the major concern. Instead, it is WHAT event has happened during the day that directs us toward anger or being upset. When your ego stops to dwell on some wrong done to you, you will feel injured. How many mistakes were "unimportant" until we stopped to decide they deserved much more of our attention? It's then that we feel injured. Look at the situation and then let it go. It may be another person you have to forgive, it may be yourself. Develop a belief that grievances are unworthy of you, that there is place in your life to forgive others. Forgiveness is an open door to love and peace that allows other in, but shuts itself on unfair judgments and false pride. Forgiveness is the alternative to being angry and judgmental. When you forgive you achieve the gift of love, happiness and peace.
I was cruelly treated if not deliberately provoked, abandoned and left to assume major responsibilities that should have been shared by by someone whom I admired, loved and trusted. It turned out that I was a joke to her, someone to manipulate for her own convenience, until she wsa done with me. Or so it sometimes seems. Perhaps the real story is that she became angry with me and acted very harshly towards me. Either way, she was dishonest and hurtful at the end and did not care at all about my feelings. I was devastated. I have been angry and resentful at times. Forgiveness is hard when it seems undeserved. I can forgive only after I understand, and with the passage of time. But when I forgive, sincerely forgive rather than merely saying it, then I can move forward. From this nightmare I have learned lessons of a lifetime. And I really loved and respected this person, and learned so much during the time we were together. I was disappointed and surprised, and I will draw the lessons I can, make the changes I should, learn to forgive her sincerely, and move forward. What else can you do, what's a man to do, if not this?
Forgiveness and 'Letting Go' seem to go hand in hand - ultimately it's a choice we make within ourselves.
Sometime, it feels 'comfortable' to hold onto the grudge (i.e. unforgivening attitude) we have, it's one way that we still remain in contact with the person we have bitter thoughts and feelings towards.
Ultimately though, I've learned, it really is best to let go and forgive - in my case, I've had to forgive family that don't even realize they've 'done me wrong' - my reaction is disappointment towards them and sadness that they are the one's missing out on a relationship with me and my family.
It's not always easy to have that attitude and bitterness and disappointment (and yes anger) slip in there at times towards the way I perceive the injustice done towards me and my family, but it's then when those dark and mean thoughts come into my head and heart that I have to drive them out with the CHOICE to forgive and let go - it's a process much like working out, you've got to keep doing it to get better at it and become healthier.
Think of this as 'Oprah Style' - "YOU CAN DOOOO IIIIIttt!!!!" :)
I have tried my best to forgive someone that I trusted with my heart and soul from the time I was 17yrs. old until I was 40. That person turned out to be a liar and a cheater not only cheating on me once but numorus times according to a mutual friend. Always through a smile. We had a daughter together and I never caught on. He had my complete love and trust. Then I began to notice he "dumped" our daughter off at his parents house over and over again while I was at work...as a nurse. That is when I got a sick, sad feeling that something was wrong. One day while putting away laundry I found her photo. I wanted to die and I also wanted to do something painful to him. But I didn't...I just cried. He acted like he cared... but he really didn't. He just treated me like I was not real and couldn't possibly feel pain. I finally locked him out and divorded him. He also treated our daughter like she felt no pain either. I have never received a simple "I'm sorry for the way I treated you both" I guess the trick is to believe he was no more than a dumb animal that peed on the floor and forgive him. That is not stretching it. Yes I would agree I would feel a hell of a lot better if he ask me to forgive him, but I am not very good at pretending. I guess I could say he was an animal for what he did but animals don't act so cruel....if they must "kill" they make it quick and as painless as possible. A message to those that should ask for some sort of forg
After reading the comments from betrayed spouses/partners, I think I see some patterns that I've had to fight in my own marriage. Did we and are we still making that person and relationship our "god" rather than first having a strong relationship with the one true God? Yes, we're praying but are we praying to first open our eyes and change me? Seriously, who are you without that person? And let's be frank, you knew long before anyone else what was happening but were you unwilling to give up your lifestyle for exposing the truth? What role did we play? Were we totally wrapped up in our children and made them first instead of the marriage? Just some thoughts.
Your pain is real. I have had it before, have it now, and will probably have it again.
Its the pain of betrayal.
I am learning how to forgive myself as part of the process of letting go and moving on. It is certainly not easy and requires me to go into my pain to see the light.
But that requires becoming responsible for my own health and well-being - and not being the victim. I have to see what my role was under the circumstances. I knew exactly the times when I should've left - when I found out she was lying the first time, the second time, the third time - why did I stay?
Ego reasons. She's beautiful.
Fear reasons. I'll be alone.
Desire reasons. I want to be loved......
But lying is not love.
And she is a lesson for me. When I learn this lesson, the path will disappear and the pain will dissolve.
Until then it is here, and it is real. There are great books about letting go of people who betray us - a thousand names for it - codependency.... is a big one...
I like the suggestions in these blog responses about not wallowing in the circumstances and following the steps of forgiveness.
Look up the Karpman Drama Triangle.
Love yourself first.
And remember - she has her own path to follow before she can be kind and loving in a real way.
You are a lesson for her. She just hasn't learned it yet.
Dee posted a comment similar to what I would say. There is a lot of information on forgiving others...some on forgiving self for errors....yet many times, it is forgiving self for "allowing" what the other person did...and it's hard to find help for that.
Dr. Creagan is unprofessional by quoting "scripture" as a reason one should forgive and such a statement is does not reflect well on the unbiased science the Mayo Clinic reputation has been built upon. Surely the benefits of forgiveness can be both qualitively and quantitively measured in Wiccans , Buddhists, Atheists, Nonbelivers as well as those simply dissinterested in religion. The act of forgiveness for the benefits of ones own mental health are not necessarily tied to any religious belief (although they may be a tenet of some). Perhaps Dr. Creagan's prescription for anxiety is good ol' fashioned Baptism. When your readers access the Mayo Clinic site they expect unbiased science as the answer to their queries. Please be more professional than to make these types of statements.
Hi, I had been going out with my girl friend for 3 years before we broke up when I found out that she had cheated on me twice during the period. I had always been there for her, she was suffering from depression due to her parent's divorce (she and I are only 20 years old). I took her to psychiatrists, therapists, and paid for all of it myself. When I realized what she had done I tried to commit suicide and was in the hospital for a couple of days. She never visited or even called to see how I was doing. Later I also found out that she had been making fun of me behind my back and it has all just shocked me. I have been going for therapy since this was my first serious relationship and it really affected me a lot. I am still unable to rationalize it to myself as to why she would have acted in this way. When I confronted her later she said she didn't know. That she is selfish and she feels bad but never actually apologized. I am really trying to forgive her but I feel so hurt, betrayed and deceived that I don't really know how to forgive her. Anyone have any advice for me please?
for Paula, write you husband a letter. It's a way of letting go for you. I've tried it and it works.
Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and hopeing the other person dies. I don't believe we can totally forgive without gods help.
I agree with your comment, we can try and do our best to lovingly confront the person but if they are unwilling to be honest about their actions it is best to forgive for your own sake and move on with your life and give those beloved people to God.
All of this forgiveness talk just seems to foster wrongdoing. If I am a malicious actor, and there is no negative consequence as a result of my malicious actions from the person I wronged, then there is no incentive to stop my malicious behavior.
Appreciate the spirit re forgivness. Forgiving myself first, by allowing this pain is a concept i have been thinking through. I have difficulity b/c I know I am not at fault for his cheating. I am not at fault for his lying, denying. My question then is: if i realize I am not at fault, why should I forgive myself 1st?
Forgiveness is a gift I give myself. If I forgive the person who hurt me I am set free from anger& retribution. It doesn't matter that that person did not ask for forgiveness or deserve it. It was for me and I am free!!
This is for r, yes, sometimes we do lose our cool and say things that shouldn't necessarily be said. Your friend has got your messages, but probably needs time to digest, forgive and forget what you said to her. So just give her time and she will come right back on track.
I have been hurt by a friend that was very very important to me I always went out of my way to be there for her i lived 600 miles away ,but when my children had events she could never come ,i moved away 18 years ago and she has visited me 3 times in all those years and i cant count the # of times i have been to see her,anyway when she didnt come to my sons graduation it hurt me really bad ,while the other night i told her that i couldnt make her daughters wedding because i made other plans with my family and i had a little to much to drink and said that no one cared to come to my kids things so why should i go to anyone eles kids events and i think i hurt her feeling i called and left a message that i was sorry and emailed her and told her i was sorry but she is not responding to my attempts, do i just let go or keep trying ?
is it sometimes the case that a person needs to forgive themselves first for the pain and suffering they've allowed themselves to participate in before they can then move on to forgive others?
My husband of 24 years, was having affairs, for how long I do not know. He denied, & denied, however I knew the truth because I voice recorded it all. Sadly he passed away in Feburary, now I find myself seeking forgivness. I, in all my years of life have never had the painstaking experience of the intensity of true forgivness. For me this is huge ! With his death I find no clousure. I find nothing that justifies his behavior. I was in the process of divorce when he passed in his sleep. Now I am seeking to forgive him so I will be able to move forward w/ my life. For me, it is much more difficult to forgive when one can not talk w/ the offender. Rather, it is like a huge silence, w/ no communication or body language. It is just silent! This is very difficult! I work on this in the morning through the night. I realize feeling negative will not help me through this, however, occasionally, I feel it will never cease. I work on this with prayer, belief that God will heal me in His own time. And I do realize it has been only 3 months, and time hopefully will help me to accept his infidelity. I question do I accept or forgive? Or are both interwined?
Lack of Forgiveness, what does it give us? By not forgiving it creates bondage in slavery under Satan's terms, not Gods, we become non effective in hearing Gods word, it clouds our judgment, it separates us from the Holy Spirit and effective communication from God, it is a tough cross to bare because as it hangs on us each every new act of not forgiving creates another nail in our flesh from Satan's hammer. When we go to pull those out it hurts, each time we begin to pull rather than endure the pain of removal it becomes easier to leave the nails in and just take it, soon we become numb to its destruction, each nail going in easier and easier each time. This creates things like, denial, bigotry, hatred, separation from God and his effectiveness in his creation of us. As he states in Genesis 50:17-21 (paraphrased) In asking forgiveness: "Before he died your Father instructed us to tell you to forgive us for the great evil we did to you. We servants of the God of your Father beg you to forgive us."
In giving Forgiveness: "Don't be afraid of me. Am I God, to judge and punish you? As far as I am concerned, God turned into good what you meant for evil, for he brought me to this high position I have today, so that I could save the lives of many people. No do not be afraid. indeed I will take care of you and your families, and he spoke this with kindness." Joseph did not let slavery interrupt what Gods intentions were. Nor should we. Slavery or Freedom, it is you
I struggled with that one for a long time. I was raised by an alcoholic, abusive father who screamed at me on a regular basis. After years of reading, counsel, and church attendance, I finally found the grace of forgiveness. There is a process to this. There are steps which are not necessarily congruent.
1. Feel the anger and let it be an empowering source. Let it be a motivating source of positive change. Martine Luther King translated it into changing race relations in an entire country; Mother Teresa let anger push her to providing compassion for the dying, and Mahatma Ghandi morped an entire nation into peace using his anger as a foundation.
2. Join support groups. But find one whose members move on to change and goal setting, rather than letting circumstances rule their lives.
3. Pray for those whose actions are hurtful. This releases the victim and the perpetrator.
4. Let their negative actions serve as lessons to us.
5. Be patient. Forgiveness can be mixed with real pain.
Barbara A
Been married for 25 years now. I have every reason to believe that my husband was sleeping around with our housemaid and his mother's housemaid after 8 years of our marriage.I had seen both of them laughing and joking about me coz they didnt know that I was in the hallway.Dont see in what right could a housemaid laugh with her boss about his wife unless..!!!With an earlier maid, when he came back from a trip, he handed me two nighties (same but different colours) and asked me to take one & give the maid the other one!When I confronted him, he always made me to be someone crazy who imagined things and walked out of the house to avoid any further discussion. I used to cry myself to death, shout and fight with him.After his mother's death, four years ago, he doesnt have any place to run away to.Has changed, I believe, but wont admit to these "housely affairs".I am so negatively obssessed that I havent had a maid in my house for a very long time now.He is another person now, looks into every need of mine.I can see how much he loves me without him telling me,through his actions of wanting to please me all the time.But he will never admit that he ever had these affairs.But I know he has.He never rejects it firmly, but he neither accepts.But those incidences run in my mind every week or two like nightmares, especially before my period.I cant let go.I need help.We r like 2 love birds and then suddenly those 16yr old memories become so vivid and I remind him again of it.
Like the first lady my husband of 36 years had an affair. I didnt find out about for several years. The hurt is no less because time has passed. In fact it is worse because at my age the option of starting over is not there. I dont' love him like I used to and I will never forgive him, I can't. I have learned to find happiness in things that don't involve him. Forgiveness and trust must be earned and he has proven himself untrustworthy. I have lost all respect for him and we fight quite frequently, however I will stay in the marriage because of what we have built, two children, 3 grandchildren and a beautiful home. My councelor who was not much help - gave me one piece of advice. Pretend that I am living with my brother that I don't particularly like. We share the same house but that is all.
I have found it very hard to completely forgive. I know I have some, but not entirely. My husband of 36 years had an 8 month affair, told me he was IN love with the other woman, but still loved me. (Said he said those things to make me hate him, cause he figured I would divorce him anyway). It took it's toll on me emotionally and physically. My husband ended the affair, reaffirmed his love for me, continues to apologize and do all he can to repent. But my hurt is so deep, because I trusted him completely and though our marriage was special. I have suffered deep depression, panic & anxiety attacks, and even night terrors. I know if I can completely forgive him this will pass. But I am so afraid of believing and trusting him, because I know it will never be the same. I still love him, but not in the same way I did before. I know God has forgiven him & I should too. I just wish I could learn to, so that the hurt wouldn't be so deep anymore. Counseling has not helped a great deal, nor antidepressants. I pray someone can help me figure it out. I pray others do not allow themselves to go through all I have, insecurites, self-doubt, new low self-esteem, fear of feeling safe with our relationship & our future. I know forgiveness would help me get out of this deep pain, but I just haven't figured out how to yet. Maybe, because he cannot make me understand why he did it. I want to quit hurting so bad.
I don't want to imply an lack of respect for the bloggers who have mentioned God or Jesus when taking about forgivness, but I know that some people are turned off by references to God and Jesus. This is for those people. You may be very angry over a hurt. Give yourself permission to be angry--for awhile. Then look at all the energy that your anger is wasting with no benefit to you. Examine what you did that played a part in the hurt. Then make a plan. Let the hurt go! Right the wrong by making it better for the next person. I was emotionally abused by my 1st husband. I did alot of therapy and examined my life and why I ended up in a marriage like that and why I stayed for 21 years. I forgave myself for allowing that to continue so long. I did not stay angry at my ex. I let it go and made a new life for my self and shared my story with other women. This little blog makes it sound easy but it is not. Healing never goes in a straight line, but staying angry just makes you bitter.
Got Divorced 11 years agao and still cabt forgive me ex-husband after talking full custody of my who was five at the the time and having nothing to do with my other son who was 12 not by him had a girlfreind hooked me on drugs lost my 12 year old to my parents wasnt there for my children but now its different I see my children but there is no respect no communication with my ex and he has another girlfreind the other one is soon to be hes 3rd ex-wife I still love him but I know I have to lrt go and move on but I cant cause I cant forgive him in the meantime i have been suffering emotionally physically with depression abd abger issues . what do i do to be happy.
Maybe the proper word is "recuse", this means disqualifying oneself to judge. This frees oneself and also does not burden one with the obligations generally associated with forgiveness. (The offender may not even acknowledge they have committed a wrong.) Forgiveness requires the offender to admit the wrong, ask to be forgiven, provide compensation, etc.
I am stressed out. Taking my dog out of Costa Rica, the strict red tape from the government cannot be handled by the vets who is supposed to prepare the necessary documents for export. lnstead, they lost the papers.
The airline's local staff don't check thoroughly the pet restrictions before selling airtickets.
Forgiveness is the way to treat stress?? Not this time. I am about to lose my dog if they are so irresponsible and unprofessionally incapable.
Are you kidding? I am about to lose my dog if they are not capable helping me.
For all those who search for forgiveness or any other thing in life.All we have to do is look inward. If you have asked Jesus to live inside you. Forgiveness will be waiting for you but first you have to forgive yourself.Here is a quote Like two golden birds perched on the selfsame tree,intimate friends,the ego and the self dwell in the same body.The former eats the sweet and sour fruits of the tree of life,while the latter looks on in detachment. If you don't have detachment you won't find forgiveness. God Bless
In the Lord's Prayer we ask God to forgive us as we forgive others. To me, that is very powerful - I must forgive if I expect God to forgive me. It isn't easy, and yes, sometimes it is ongoing, but it can be done. If there is a person who repetitively hurts you, it is best to get away from that situation if you can. If not, then you need to practice repetive forgiveness. You are not condoning their actions, just forgiving them for being a jerk and freeing yourself from the anger. It reminds me of the story of the TWO WOLVES
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson
about a battle that goes on inside people. He said,
"My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.
"One is Evil - It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow,
regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment,
inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
"The other is Good - It is joy, peace, love,
hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence,
empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and
then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
If you can't forgive, you are feeding the wrong wolf!
I think there's a big, and very important, difference between "forgiving" and "letting go." It seems to me that forgiving someone who does not acknowledge having done anything wrong and has no repentance is an insult to both parties. It also seems to me that we could be usurping the authority of the Creator in doing so. On the other hand, a person can truly "let go" of the past and move forward, refusing to be limited by what has happened. To let go is affirming to oneself and also respects the freedom of the other party to engage in his/her own internal process and relationship with the Eternal -- and leaves authority in the hands of the Creator. That's how I see and experience things.
I am a huge fan of the BOUNDARIES books (Drs. Cloud & Townsend) which have helped me work through forgiveness. Ultimately, I need to "forgive as I have been forgiven." No one is perfect, that includes myself.
I had been searching for forgiveness for years and couldn't find it anywhere. Alll I could find was depression and a messed up mind. Finally I took the splinter out of my own eye, asked God for forgiveness in prayer and "Bingo," there it was. It was the most freeing experience I ever had. As soon as I got it, I coud give it. In my case I was able to girwjvqjve the forgiveness to myself. Keep up the good work with your blogs. I can't help but think you must be helping a lot of people sort things out.
True forgiveness comes from God. It has the power to change not only the person who forgives, but also the one who is forgiven. I had to forgive and let go of past anger to unblock my spirit and allow God to work in me. It is not possible to forgive truely without God's help! Because you "absorb" some of the pain that you would have inflicted in your anger, you suffer in forgiveness, and in a sense die. This is when Christ can really work in and through you. It is always worth while to choose life over bitterness and resentment!
Forgiveness is a very difficult thing to do under any circumstance. I recently read the moving book, "Amish Grace," which is about how Amish families were able to forgive the 2006 school shooter who killed 5 children, seriously wounded numerous others and then took his own life. I almost think it would be easier, however, to forgive someone who is dead and who committed a senseless, random violent act, than to forgive someone who is very much alive, who is a daily presence in your life and who committed a very personal attack. How do you forgive someone when the other person is not repentant, and when you're forced to repeatedly interact with this person who continues to hurt you and mock you openly at every opportunity? It is so easy to become consumed with rage and bitterness. But you're right to say that surrendering your own peace of mind is not wise. Personally, my only strategy is prayer -- every time thoughts of anger and resentment enter my mind, I ask God to remove the anger, to create in me a clean heart and to renew a right spirit within me. And I repeat this prayer over and over again as needed.
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I just got an idea in my mind...Is it just me, or does Ichigo seem a little over-rated? I mean, take this into account...
The only fights he ever won w/o breaking a sweat were against three Lieutenants, Isane Kotetsu, Marechiyo Omaeda, and Chojiro Sasakibe. Chojiro is a lazy fat bastard, who never fights, EVER(I seriously wonder how such a fat lard-ass got into the Corvette of the Gotei 13 Divisions). Isane comes from the 4th Division, which has the weakest physical attackers in the Gotei 13. Chojiro is...Well...He used a rapier against a freakin' Uber-cleaver. How did he think that would turn out?
He got his ass handed to him by Byakuya, Aizen, Yammy, Renji, Grimmjow(twice), and Ulquiorra, his Inner Hollow nearly took him over for good, he was killed, twice, by the same guy(Ulquiorra), and he barely managed a victory against Grimmjow, who wasn't even in the top 5 Espada, and that was when he(ichigo) had Hollowfied. Hell, Aizen even managed to cut him almost completely in half(easily my favorite moment in Vol.20, hands down).
Which brings me to his so-called "victories". He managed to beat Renji okay, after breaking Renji's only real means of offense, and with an OMFG Hax Random Getsuuga Tenshou(I seriously think Zangetsu was watching this fight the whole time, and decided not to let himself suffer any further embarrassment and fired that attack off).
Next, we have Byakuya. Here is where his overrated-ness really shines. Not only did Hollow Ichigo(who will henceforth be referred to as Shirosaki) interfere and utterly pwn Byakuya, but Ichigo didn't even technically win. Byakuya SURRENDERED.
A couple hundred ass-whuppings later, Ichigo faces off against Grimmjow for the 3rd and final time, just barely scraping out a win. Almost instantly after, Ichigo gets pwned again, this time by Nnoitra Jiruga and his Fraccion with the wierd Zanpakuto, effectively canceling out his earlier win.
And finally, in his grandest display of Fail, and I mean EVER(seriously, he'll have a hard time topping this), is his second fight with Ulquiorra Cifer, the Cuatro Espada.
He begins okay enough, but only because he literally pulls out all the stops FROM THE VERY BEGINNING. Anyone who plays any type of RPG, and manages to make it to the Final Boss, knows that this is NOT A GOOD THING TO DO. I mean, think about it. How many of these bosses have a couple more forms, one after the other? But I digress...
So, Ichigo comes in swinging, Ulquiorra gets shaken up. Ichigo opens up his big fat mouth and says that Ulquiora is slightly becoming more human, which pisses off The Most Badass Emo In Existence. Ulquiorra doesn't even release, he just flares up his Reiatsu, and gains a noticeable advantage. Then, when Ichigo manages to cut him(once, barely, on the cheek), he releases, and begins to totally, completely, and utterly RAPE Ichigo(not literally of course, this ins't a Yaoi manga, thank God).
Then Ulquiorra kills Ichigo, who is brought back to life by Shirosaki imitating Zangetsu's sentiments from the Ichigo/Renji bout I mentioned before. Ichigo now has the powers of a Hollow God, only without any of the sanity/mental capacity. He simply decides to return Ulquiorra's favor of waking him up with the world's most painful handshake(ripping Ulquiorra's arm off). Then, Ichigo goes and blasts Ulquiorra not only TO Hell, but CLEAN THROUGH ALL 7 CIRCLES(an exaggeration, but I like to imagine this kind of thing...for kicks, I like to imagine Ulquiorra waving at the chained form of Satan as he goes soaring past(Ulquiorra, not the devil).
Then, in what can only be explained as the ultimate Product Malfunction, the mask breaks, thus returning Ichigo to normal(save one insane orange mullet). At this point, Kubo decides to use his own Bankai and use its power of HAXXXORZ to kill off Ulquiorra, while making Ichigo lament over his 'victory', stating how 'this wasn't how he wanted to win'. You're lucky to have won at all!!!
Next, in a rather lackluster show, Ichigo proceeds to fight Yammy, in a nearly perfect recap of their first bout. Ichigo goes Bankai, lands one decent blow, then gets pwned once more, only to be saved at the last moment by two people fans were recently wondering "where are they now?".
In conclusion, Ichigo is not only overrated, but he is pretty damn weak when you think about it.
Ready, Set, Discuss!

subset: commoncrawl


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The Big Issue Lunch
Event Details:
Join us for an afternoon of fine food at The Big Lunch in Adelaide on Sunday, July 14, and help raise money for The Big Issue.
Returning for a third year, The Big Lunch will treat guests to the ultimate food experience, prepared by celebrity chef Simon Bryant, former MasterChef Contestant Callum Hann and Hilton Adelaide Executive Chef Dennis Leslie.
Diners will be seated at long tables stretching the length of our Market, with most of the produce sourced from market stallholders.
Following sell-out events in 2011 and 2012, The Big Lunch has raised almost $50,000 for The Big Issue's work in SA.
Tickets cost $130 per person or $1200 for a table of 10.
Book tix here.


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619 is out, at mangapanda
Mangastream version here
Very good!
619 is out, at mangapanda
Mangastream version here
Last edited by stefanhendriks; 02-05-2013 at 01:17 PM. Reason: Added mangastream version
1st acts like Naruto. I can't say I'm surprised. Okay, so that explain why one should "kill" your kin or something to activate the mangekyu. How Kakashi obtains his is still a mystery though.
sig made by me
Great chapter! I love seeing the personalities of the previous hokage
The whole explanation of the Sharingan's evolution by turning heartbreak into hatred (and also funneling chakra into the eye and thus increasing its power) was a little goofy. I'm still deciding whether I like it or not... on one hand, it's almost NICE to know that people like Obito and Sasuke are undergoing rapid character changes due in part to mental instability (thus actually making it more believable)... on the other hand it sort of undermines the character development such as it was, and replaces it with a really awkward explanation.
It almost feels a little like phrenology.
I like Hashirama's disposition being like Naruto's; maybe now people can start realizing that Naruto's personality doesn't really hold him back in terms of becoming a respectable Hokage.
I'm glad it's confirmed that Itachi was the spy within Akatsuki. I just wish this had been revealed earlier, around the time that Itachi/Jiraiya died.
http://www.mangapanda.com/naruto/605/4), so obviously it's enough to have an Uchiha-brain near by and one eye, and if the other eye happens to be around, it is affected as well without the negative side effects.
Makes you wonder if it might be an option to transplant Uchiha-eyes to other shinobi to prevent all this from the start.
Haha the chat between the hokages was quite funny^^
● This .. I did not expect .. when Orochimaru first used Edo Tensei to bring Shodai and Niidai to fight Sandai, they acted COMPLETELY different then what I saw in this chapter. Its like the two brothers from before and from todays chapter are different people. Kishis excuse ? "Im not blocking theyre personalities bla bla". Somehow Im not buying it .. Kishi seems to be pulling ideas on the fly now.
● Guess what, Hashirama is basically grown-up Naruto with long black hair and Mokuton. I expected Naruto to remain original in his persona but now its confirmed that Kishi has character templates and stereotypes that he recycles. Now I even expect Rikudo Sage to turn out just like Naruto.
● Whats up with Orochimaru ? I cant read his intentions at all, its like he turned into a narrator, a neutral character that just sees over the continuation of plot. The character changes are too drastic in my opinion ..
● Sarutobi didnt really say anything we didnt already know about Itachi, but atleast Tobirama officialy explained that uchihas are in fact a SERIOUSLY over-sensitive bunch that has it in theyre genes to go crazy over heart-break. Explains pretty much everything about uchihas.
● Sasuke heard about the incident from Tobi, Danzou and even Itachi himself but only now that Sarutobi told him he finally accepts that it is really the truth. Seems like Sasuke still has a lot of respect and trust for Sarutobi ..
● Oh and I almost forgot, Tobirama rules !! He has the brains, authority, bad-ass attitude and simply bosses everything around. Love it !
Naruto, Bleach, One Piece, Fairy Tail, Claymore, Ao No Exorcist, Katekyo Hitman Reborn, Gamaran, Toriko, Vinland Saga, Gantz, Wolf Guy, Deadman Wonderland, Vagabond, Blade of The Immortal, Battle Royale, Zettman
I really liked see this conversation, excellent way to introduce the personalities of the first 2 Hokages. Haha, and I love Hashirama's reaction to Tsunade being in charge. I know a few people who would agree with him.
Aggravate, Anger, and Piss off
Naruto, Bleach, One Piece, Fairy Tail, Claymore, Ao No Exorcist, Katekyo Hitman Reborn, Gamaran, Toriko, Vinland Saga, Gantz, Wolf Guy, Deadman Wonderland, Vagabond, Blade of The Immortal, Battle Royale, Zettman


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Skip to comments.Watch this guy explore Detroit's abandoned Packard Plant on a dirt bike.
Posted on 01/21/2014 10:00:39 AM PST by nascarnation
Packard gave up on its automotive plant in Detroit in 1956, but the 3,500,000-square-foot complex of reinforced concrete remains - if only as remains. It is perhaps just as famous for being ruins as it was when it built cars, still attracting plenty of attention from entrepreneurs, paintballers, vandals and urban spelunkers.
Creative types love them some Packard Plant, too, evidenced by the short film produced by Cantini Pictures when they wanted to test out a homemade motorcycle and an aerial drone. The result is a few minutes of "motocross meets the monument."
Check it out in the video below. And in case it isn't obvious, you probably shouldn't try this at home... nor at the Packard plant. For a more traditional history with lots of photos, a piece in the Detroit Free Press can fill you in.
(Excerpt) Read more at autoblog.com ...
I'm moving to Detroit. Only a matter of time. The only things missing from this vid are paintguns.
"What a dump."
Sad state of disrepair and decay.
Best of luck. Maybe you can start a restoration revival of that once great place called Detroit.
Riding on that roof looks pretty scary. No telling when you'll find a weak spot.
The sad thing about the Packard plant is that it had working businesses in it not much more than a decade ago. Scumbags on the city council saw a quick buck and let a chinese salvage company come in and start tearing out wiring and other useful metals.
I remember seeing an interview with a guy who was restoring classic cars in part of the building at the time. He said they were working like any other day and the lights went out. He went to find out what the deal was and a found that the city had cut the power so the salvage crew could get started.
Absolutely, maybe they could include this event in the X-games....
No, but I'd love to blog about it, if I could find a way to make money doing so. Some might object. ;)
Interesting background link in the article.
The people who have been in charge of Detroit for the past thirty years should be caught, tried and hanged for what they did to the citizens of that city.
BTW the property has been sold.
Sad picture. Detroit factory workers begin dismantling Packard assembly line ...
Ping For Later Enjoyment!
From your link...
Fernando Palazuelo, of Peru, now owns the site which spans more than 40 acres on Detroits east side.
The third-place bidder in a Wayne County auction, Palazuelo paid $405,000 after two other bids fell through.
Amazing pic, like they were tearing out the line right after the final car passed by.
That is, I believe, the place where they built the Packard Merlin that powered my father's P-51.
When his squadron went on sorties across the North Sea to Norway in the winter of 1944-45, they were told that if the engine failed, no one would come to look for them, because they'd be dead before the search planes got off the ground.
The Packard workers did their job well. If they had not, I would not be here. Sad to see this place in such a state of decay.
Just don't excerpt!!
I'm fascinated with Detroit - the history and glory days. There has to be a way back.
a certain irony riding the Honda 2 stroke, through a collapsed American automotive plant.....
just sayin'
The Way Back Machine?
Yes I believe you are correct.
Many years after the fact I worked in the labs where the Allison V1710 engines were tested during WW2.
I will say they ran the living sh!t out of each engine before shipping it to make sure there were no premature failures.
Agree, but also ironic that so many of Honda's cars and bikes are now built here in the US.
Lol...yeah, that's it.
I'll have to check it out later. Won't load on my smart phone.
"The first two Packard-built Merlins to be completed were demonstrated on test stands at a special ceremony at the Packard plant in Detroit on August 2, 1941.
Full production began in 1942 and by the end of World War II, 55,873 Merlins had been produced in the U.S.A. The Army Air Forces used the engine almost exclusively in the famed P-51 "Mustang", for it provided greatly improved high-altitude performance over the Allison V-1710 engine used in earlier series of the airplane. The V-1650 Merlin also replaced the V-1710 in the "F" series of the P-40. The British also used Packard-built Merlin's during the last three years of the war in their "Spitfire", "Mosquito", and "Lancaster" airplanes."
Things have a long way to go but things are changing in Detroit and other cities would be well advised to keep an eye on what is happening there.
Things like allowing private companies to compete with public services. When it comes to direct personal freedoms I doubt you could find a freer big city in the country. There is now a pro gun police chief who is doing the heavy lifting and there has been a significant drop in the violent crime rate.
There is a lot of Canadian investment going on in Detroit and big financial players are transferring a lot of people to Detroit from NY.
First car I can remember well..at age 6..my dad's new 1953 Packard Caribbean coupe..the swan hood ornament was gorgeous..and he had those curb feelers on the fenders...I loved to play with them when the car was in the driveway.
A buddy and I had "big plans", years ago, to go buy a bunch of houses that were selling for $1 in Detroit. We were dreaming of being a two-person revitalization team.
Enjoy the audio of this P-51 fly by with the Merlin engine humming along.
I love the smell of high octane av gas in the morning..
seeing all the graffiti in there, it might be good to use the buddy system when entering.
They were literally tearing up the floor as the last car cleared the line?? I hope it's in a museum somewhere.
I read that the owner of the Ambassador Bridge is doing an effective job of tying up the land purchase for the new bridge to Windsor. True?
"And in case it isn't obvious, you probably shouldn't try this at home."
Why not? My home is well over 3.5 million square feet.
I'll bet that makes the Noo Yawkers deliriously happy. /s
40 years of liberal control
The last Packards that were built in Detroit were made in 1956. The car in the picture is, I believe, a 1954 Clipper.
Neat post!!
PACKARD MOTOR CAR COMPANY is a registered Arizona Corporation and is the registered owner of the Packard Name Trademark for automobiles and parts. The Company licenses various companies to use the Packard name, and the Company also manufactures and markets Packard branded automobile parts.
I understand China is also buying into Detroit. (Re; FOX Business News)
Detroit sits astride the busiest trade corridor on the continent and its crossing is the second busiest freight crossing on the continent after Laredo.
That's not going to change and its something conservatives should want to gain control of.
My personal opinion on this new model of Packard is...YUCK.
I hate the look of almost every car out in the past 35 years or so. The one of a handful in this period that I do like is the Ford Mustang. Also the VW Bug, until the most recent year or two when they've flattened them out, as opposed to the classic VW "bubble" shape the retros originally had.
I'm not sure I'd go in there without my own personal team of Navy Seals, LOL.
That's a 4-stroker my FRiend.
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By Biz Buzz Blog
Square Books in Oxford has been named the Publishers Weekly Bookstore of the Year.
Here's an excerpt from the story: "As Grove Atlantic publisher Morgan Entrekin noted in a letter to the awards committee, "I am somewhat surprised to find myself writing a letter recommending that Square Books be selected as Bookstore of the Year primarily because I cannot believe it has not been selected before. Square Books is one of the greatest bookstores in America."
Click here for more at Biz Buzz Blog.


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By PHIL FAUVERGuest Writer
The county commissioners met in their Sept. 28 meeing, Commissioner Gary Kofford was out-of-state and not present. Jeff Horrocks, acting as chairman opened the meeting.
The first item in the Consent Agenda was the ratification of the signature on the contract for elevator work by Kone Elevator Repair Company. They ratified the signature on agreements with Questar for natural gas service for the Huntington airport and the food bank. The County Commission approved the hiring of Tina Bradley as a part-time assistant librarian for the Cleveland Library, working 16 hours per week, and to hire Debbie Murray as a part-time janitor for the Huntington Library, working 7.5 hours per week. They also approved the hiring of Tennyson Fauver, Connor Benson, Lane Gardner, McKay West and Sam Smith as part-time lifeguards working 19 3/4 hours per week. None of the above will receive benefits with their employment.
The commission approved the closing of the Board of Equalization for 2010. Brenda Tuttle reported: The notices were sent out in July of 2010, and people have had sufficient time to protest the value disclosed on their tax notice.
The commission approved the Board of Equalization property value adjustments reported by the County Assessor Kris Bell. The commission also approved the Veteran, the Circuit Breaker and the Blind Abatements for property taxes. Tuttle said there were abatements available for people in the above categories that can reduce their property taxes. The biggest is a Circuit Breaker program funded partially by the state and the County. This is based on your income and if you are age 65 or a widow or widower. Another program is the Blind Abatement if you are legally blind. There is a $11,500 value that you can apply for to reduce your taxes. The Veterans Exemption, to apply for that you have to be at least 10 percent disabled through the Veterans Administration to qualify for the exemption. The total amount of the abatements is $76,565. The county will be reimbursed by the state for the circuit breaker program in the amount of $39,913.
The consideration of county participation in the Wilberg Grazing Allotment Landfill Mitigation Project sponsored by San Rafael Conservation District was tabled until the commission receives a memo of understanding between the parties. There is a Personal Property Tax Exemption for businesses under $3,800. Based on legislation of two years ago. If your business is under $3,800. You don't have to pay taxes on personal property. That is not a tax on income that is tax on personal property value. The commission approved the personal property tax exemption.
Phil Fauver asked why there are no signs along Highway 10 indicating where off the highway towns are, such as Elmo, Cleveland, Lawrence and Moore. The only signs are signs that indicate to the driver that he/she is coming to a road. After turning on the road and traveling a quarter to half mile there are signs telling the driver the number of miles to the town or towns. If a visitor is traveling down highway 10, they would believe without having a map that there are no off the highway towns along the highway 10. Why does the Utah Department of Transportation and Emery County Road Department not want signs along highway 10 to indicate where our small towns are. The Emery County Travel Bureau should also be interested in seeing that there are signs indicating where off-highway towns are to attract more tourists. Commissioner Pitchforth and Commissioner Horrocks said they would check with Bevan Wilson of the Utah Department of Transportation to find out why there are no signs along highway 10.
Commissioner Horrocks reported on activities he had observed in the county. The Lila Canyon Road should be completed in about three weeks so that trucks can haul coal down that road. At the mine they have about 30 to 40,000 tons of coal on the ground ready to be shipped as soon as the road is finished. The county would like to see that coal shipped as soon as possible because it means mineral lease money coming into the County. "We recently met in Price with the new Bureau of Land Management director Juan Palma. We took him in a caravan to Buckhorn Well area to show him what our plans were. We discussed the information kiosks that we plan to install there. We then traveled to the wedge overlook. He appeared to be extremely impressed with the canyon. We then stopped at the Buckhorn panel and stopped at the swinging bridge. Ray Petersen of the public lands Council helped explain what we were doing with these public lands. Palma said he liked what we were doing and would continue to support us where he could," said Horrocks.
"At the airport the old house has been removed. The old office and one of the hangars has been removed. The runway has been fogged and painted. The tarmac has had the cracks repaired and has been fogged. The airport is now ready to use. The stem walls for the new home at the airport are in and the new home is expected to arrive Monday. We are waiting for Rocky Mountain Power to bring in the power for that home," said Horrocks.
Back Country Flyers, a group of airplane enthusiasts will fly into Huntington Airport Oct. 1 and stay Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Last year there were about 35 planes that participated. This year they anticipate as many as 60 planes will be flying in and out of the Huntington Airport. The young eagles will fly into the airport this weekend. The Castle Valley Composite Squadron cadets of the local Civil Air Patrol will be training on the marshaling of aircraft. Which means the cadets will be responsible for each aircraft when it lands or when the aircraft is being pulled out onto the runway. They will be responsible for all aircraft traffic at the airport. Anyone interested in flying or interested in airplanes is invited to come to the airport and see the planes some of them will be vintage aircraft and some may be experimental aircraft.
We had a ribbon-cutting for a new business in Huntington, called the Foot Zone. We had a ribbon-cutting yesterday in Green River for the Green River Medical Center. This was for their new addition and the remodel of the building. That project did come in on time and on budget.
A reminder: Burn dates on this side of the county start on Sept. 25 and will, end Oct. 24. The Green River burn dates start Oct. 2 and end Oct. 31. Remember that a burning permit is required from each city or town so they will have a record of who is burning and where. This will allow them to have their fire department ready to respond if needed. The food bank is currently under construction and is progressing very well. The stem wall and the footers concrete has been poured. The asphalt around the building will be laid Oct. 15. The metal building will arrive Oct. 15 and the contractor indicates that he will be able to install it in two weeks.
Commissioner Pitchforth reported the Emery County care center open house will be Oct. 13 at 10:30 a.m. There will be a ribbon-cutting program at that time. The open house will run from 11 a.m. till 2 p.m. to allow people to see and enjoy this new facility.
"Our senior luncheon was well attended and I thank Commissioner Kofford, Commissioner Horrocks, along with Kent Wilson and his wife Julie for devoting their time to make this Lamb Fry luncheon a success. I also want to thank the senior citizens center directors that helped by bringing food. But a special thanks to Jim Pierce and his daughter Melanie. They worked hard in getting this luncheon organized. Thanks to Jay Von Frandsen who willingly stepped in to supply the entertainment. He has started a new band named Haywire.
"Ferron City did such a great job on their Peach Days celebration. The flag ceremony was very emotional. The whole celebration was well organized and very enjoyable.
"Green River melon days celebration and parade was an exciting event. The other commissioners and myself were there two days. Green River really knows how to put on a celebration and they did a great job. I encourage everyone to get out and vote in this election. I encourage them to really look at the candidates and where they stand on the issues, such as public lands.
Steve Barton reported that two weeks ago there were about 500 participants that came to Emery County to run in the Little Grand Canyon marathon down through the swinging bridge. Last weekend the Recreation District held its fall Festival at the wedge overlook. Marathons and bike rides are becoming more popular in our County. The Travel Bureau advertises these events.
This year we had several participants from outside of the United States.
JR Nelson said, I noticed non-county people taking advantage of the facilities at the swimming pool. Many of these people were here to climb boulders and they swim at the swimming pool and shower at the swimming pool. I met a wonderful couple from Austria and that had come to Joe's Valley to go bouldering. In the bouldering guide book, Joe's Valley is considered the premier spot to go bouldering.