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Help with your brand color selection
Choosing colors for your brand shouldn't be about your favorite color, but rather what you want your logo to say about your company. Here's a crash course on color psychology and what the 100 most valuable brands in the world are doing.
How do companies pick logo colors?
People pick their logo colors for a wide variety of arbitrary reasons. Some choose their favorite color. Others like the color of their first car because of what it represented at the time. I originally picked purple as The Logo Factory's official color because it was my (now) wife's favorite, purple and teal was a trendy color scheme at the time and red, my favorite, seemed a little garish for what I wanted to portray. Others take a toss-the-dice approach, hoping to stumble upon a color scheme that looks "nice" on a webpage. All fine and dandy, but colors mean things and if used effectively as part of a design philosophy, can add an entire new level of effectiveness to your logo and the brand that surrounds it.
How important are colors anyway?
The most valuable brands
We can take a look at the 100 most valuable brands in the world are doing and how they use color in their logos. These companies spend millions (often billions) on marketing and brand development and they KNOW a little something about the colors they're using. There's reasons why the most valuable brands in the world use mostly primary and secondary colors, a restricted palette of one or two colors, and (mostly) limit their colors to the bars at the head of this post. It all has to do with color psychology. Accordingly, here's some diagrams that takes a look at some of that psychology, the stats of the top 100 brands and examples of logos, broken down nicely into their various color schemes:
What can we learn? A (slight) majority of the top brands are monochrome – they only use one color. The most utilized color is a shade of blue, followed (ironically) very closely by black. The color that gets the least use is purple. By a long shot. Now that we know that, let's take a look at the psychology of various colors – descending order from most popular to least – and look at how they're used by other famous corporations and brands.
Blue logos:
What blue means: Trusted. Conservative. Staid. Dependable. Honesty. Calm. Secure. Cool.
Notable: Most popular corporate color. Used frequently for online businesses & financial institutions. Masculine color.
Black logos:
What black means: Sophisticated. Luxurious. Formality. Style. Elegance. Expensive. Authoritative.
Notable: Black is used by "high-end" brands as main or paired with another color. Black is somber, serious. Most logos are actually designed in black & white first.
Red logos:
What red means: Bold. Passion. Strength. Attention. Love. Exciting. Action. Aggressive.
Notable: Red works equally well on black and white backgrounds. Can mean stop, danger and hot. An exclamation color. Pinks (tints of red) are generally considered feminine colors.
Yellow logos:
What yellow means: Logical. Optimistic. Progressive. Confident. Playful. Creative.
Notable: Yellow is (generally) too bright a color to stand on its own and will require a secondary outline, background or bordering color. Universal caution color. Represents clarity.
Orange logos:
What orange means: Happy. Energetic. Sociable. Friendly. Affordable. Enthusiastic. Sunny.
Notable: Orange is thought to stimulate appetite. Orange is used in some warning labels. Used frequently in retail. Often a "call to action."
Green logos:
What green means: Nature. Wealth. Fresh. Life. Harmony. Environment. Growth. New.
Notable: Green means "go." Used frequently to represent eco-friendly companies and products. Thought to be a calming color.
Purple logos:
What purple means: Royalty. Mystery. Pomp. Ceremony. Creative. Unique. Majesty.
Notable: Once the most expensive color to reproduce (it was made from hard-to-find sea weed) purple is often viewed as "elitist." Appeals to children and often used in candy and toy packaging.
Multi-colored logos:
What rainbow colors mean: Fun. Easy-going. Child-like. Internet. Multi-disciplinary. Authority.
Notable: Multi-colored and "rainbow" colored logos are a relatively new phenomenon due to the web and more economical four color printing. Represents a color-branding challenge.


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You may remember that I purchased a raspberry cardigan from Ann Taylor the other day. It was a final sale item ($12!) that I wasn't particularly in love with but knew it would be perfect for a DIY idea I had. I had originally planned on adding chiffon cascading flowers but the color I had didn't match so I used this knit instead. What do you think?
Can't have a New Year posting without resolutions and wish list items!
- Spend more quality time with the family DOING something. We have a tendency to be a relax in front of TV type of family and I'd really like us to bond over more activity type items.
- Be more deliberate in my shopping. Items purchased should either be super deals or something I REALLY want. No more lukewarm purchases!
- More DIY! Elevate skills from novice to intermediate.
- Related to #3, create a garment from draping rather than a pattern. Just bought a new pinnable dress form to try this and am super excited for its arrival.
- Shop in my own closet and try different combinations for new outfits.

subset: commoncrawl


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If you have read The Rules you will know that European Posterior Man-Satchels are strictly forbidden, ref Rule #28. Well to that I say Balls! While I am happy to stuff numerous items in my jersey pockets the convenience of a saddle bag is immense.
So with that said, I present you the contents and options of mine!
I recently switched over to a Topeak Wedge Pack 2, I picked it up the Sports Chalet fire sale and I have been very impressed. The rail mounted click system is very easy to use and it allows you to just slide it onto the mount and forget it. It also has a more elegant look than others that have straps the wrap around the seat post.
Additionally you can buy the mount separately and then move you bag from bike to bike without having to buy more bags! It also comes with a yellow waterproof case, not something I need in Southern California but worth mentioning.
So onto the purpose of the post. The contents. Realistically you should carry the basics that can get you back on the road. For most people that's a spare tube. I actually carry two. Want to know why, just ask Norman Stadler!
So two tubes it is then! Onwards. Next is the humble Tire Lever! First thing never ever buy non folding tires. Steel Beading is a pain in the backside. Folding tires are much easier to fit and you only need one lever, sometimes you can even do it with your fingers. Personally I like Pedro's; they big and do not break, bright yellow so you can see them when you put them down and well-made without sharp edges to rough up your wheels or slit you new tube!
Next CO2, yes there is two of them too (damn I nearly used all types of "to") and of course the head that you fit onto the valve, personally I have a Genuine Innovations Air Chuck Elite. I like it as it a pseudo on/off and you can see when it is doing something. Also it is tiny! I tape my cartridges together to give me a pretend handle and it works pretty well.
Mini Tool, my mini tool is mini, it has 6 allen keys, that's it, I have had to use this tool twice and once was helping Becca lower her seat.. If I break a chain, which I have done, I have one quick link.
Now as everyone knows you always get flats on the back wheel and that's the dirty end of the bike! So to avoid ruining gloves or my kit in general. So to avoid that I carry tow pairs of latex gloves, one per tube!
Finally cash, cos you know, coke!
These are the basics that travel with my bike wherever it goes! As you can see everything is wrapped or taped together, this is to stop any rattling.
Now I do stuff my jersey with a couple of other items. I have a Skratch aLokSak for my phone. I also throw in an Anker lipstick charger and micro Lightening cable, it's 6" long. My ANT+ dongle, plugged into my phone. Headphones and Ibuprofen, and more cash.
I also have a mini pump. It's made by Lyzene, the model is now discontinued but you get the idea. I haven't used it much but when I have needed it it's been great, this goes in my jersey pocket. For longer rides I also have a Lyzene Caddy Sack-M, inside this I have a third inner tube and CO2 and extra gloves. It's neat and tidy and fits in a jersey pocket without any issues.
So like any Boy Scout I am pretty well prepared, are you?


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Develop a compiler to translate trained Keras models to embedded c/c++
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As Port Engineer with Crescent Towing/Mobile, Dale's always been the "go to" guy for getting things done. "When we got on the bus there were shipyard workers, managers, senior executives, waitresses, folks from accounting." he recalled about the Service Day last August when C/TS employees departed from Mobile, Ala. to help their friends and coworkers in the Darrow, La. area. "People you wouldn't normally imagine doing this type of work. But we were going to help our family."
Dale's service group, one of ten that day, was assigned to Jim Denny's home. "I've known Jim for close to 30 years,' Dale remembered, 'We worked together and seeing all their hard work and memories ruined was pretty humbling. They built this house and you could even see where Jim's Dad had written measurements on the studs once we got to tearing out the damage"
They worked all day cutting out sheetrock and insulation, stripping out the bottom floor, hauling out, as Dale put it "bags full of crap." But that wasn't enough for Dale. When they returned to Mobile, he was already planning a return trip to the Denny's. Several, in fact.
"We were able to get some things donated from a hardware guy I know. Shovels, wheelbarrows, hammers, tools and Perry Gagliano picked up a car trailer. The second trip over we had insulation, electrical receptacles and plywood flooring, as well."
That second trip also included Dale's 14-year old daughter, Dena. "She really wanted to help so we put her to work pulling nails and washing dirty furniture that had floated off. She and Jim's wife, Candy, really hit it off."
Before the next trip to hang insulation and sheet rock, Dale made a couple of phone calls. "I called Bobby Turner at Cooper-Wilkins and A.J. Tritt at Crescent. A.J. had lost everything during Hurricane Katrina. Bobby and his wife, Angie, came and A.J. and Brian Karl from Crescent/NOLA came to help. Four hard workers with two phone calls. We have a lot of great people in this company. They're the ones who deserve the credit."
Jim and Candy Denny agree. "My family and I would like to thank everyone for their generosity and hard work put forth in the clean up of our flooded home.' said Jim. 'They did not hesitate to jump into that muddy mess. The Cooper Family and their Team have touched our lives. "We are Cooper" has put us on the road to recovery."
"If I ever wondered why my husband has worked for the same company for 25 years,' added Candy, 'that question was answered in August of 2016. One thing that becomes crystal clear when you are faced with this kind of devastation is who you can count on. The crew from Cooper came rolling in like a breath of fresh air. A million thanks to everyone on the Cooper team- especially Dale, his crew, and his precious daughter Dena".
What's next for Dale? "You know, you work hard to have something so you can, hopefully, relax in your later years and then suddenly it's gone. But with good people we can make things happen. That's the way we are. I wish I could be there every day until it's made right. For now, I'm just waiting on a phone call. Call me and I'll be there."
We Are Cooper/T. Smith!


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Followers of Jesus, Followers of Men and Followers of Wolves!
Only One will Inherit Eternal Life!
We are living in The End Times and There is Only One Gospel!
Anything with a word added in front of it is not the Gospel:Prosperity Gospel, Word Faith Gospel, Liberation Gospel, Emergent Gospel, Seeker Sensitive Gospel
"I marvel that you are turning away so soon from Him who called you in the grace of Christ, to a different gospel, which is not another; but there are some who trouble you and want to pervert the gospel of Christ. But even if we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel to you than what we have preached to you, let him be accursed. As we have said before, so now I say again, if anyone preaches any other gospel to you than what you have received, let him be accursed." Galatians 1:6-9
Another Gospel?
Does it take on the name of Jesus? Yes
Does it use the name of Jesus? Yes
Is it's followers the followers of Jesus? No
They were the followers of men!
"For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ." Galatians 1:10
What is The Gospel?"For since, in the wisdom of God, the world through wisdom did not know God, it pleased God through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe. For Jews request a sign, and Greeks seek after wisdom; but we preach Christ crucified, to the Jews a stumbling block and to the Greeks foolishness, but to those who are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God." 1 Corinthians 1:21-24
"And I, brethren, when I came to you, did not come with excellence of speech or of wisdom declaring to you the testimony of God. For I determined not to know anything among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified." 1 Corinthians 2:1-2
It's All About God!
Is the Gospel all about you and getting your best life now or is the Gospel all about God?It's all about God! It's all for the Glory of God! When we suffer, we do so to the Glory of God! When we rejoice, we do so in the Glory of God! When we are persecuted, we are either persecuted in the Cross that we are called to carry or we are persecuted because of our choice to live in sin not as punishment but as a consequence.
Who is this Book about? Is it all about you? Is it all about the preacher on television? Is all about the multi million dollar mega church that's run like a Wal Mart catering to your every need?No It's all about God!
"Therefore say to the house of Israel, 'Thus says the Lord God: "I do not do this for your sake, O house of Israel, but for My holy name's sake, which you have profaned among the nations wherever you went. And I will sanctify My great name, which has been profaned among the nations, which you have profaned in their midst; and the nations shall know that I am the Lord," says the Lord God, "when I am hallowed in you before their eyes. For I will take you from among the nations, gather you out of all countries, and bring you into your own land. Then I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you shall be clean; I will cleanse you from all your filthiness and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them. Then you shall dwell in the land that I gave to your fathers; you shall be My people, and I will be your God. I will deliver you from all your uncleannesses. I will call for the grain and multiply it, and bring no famine upon you. And I will multiply the fruit of your trees and the increase of your fields, so that you need never again bear the reproach of famine among the nations." Ezekial 36:22-30
God The Center of The Universe! Ephesians 1:3-14
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence, having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself, that in the dispensation of the fullness of the times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both which are in heaven and which are on earth—in Him. In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will, that we who first trusted in Christ should be to the praise of His glory. In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory."
You are not the center of the universe! God is! And if you make yourself the center of the universe or anything else: You are an Idolater! You have created another God whether that be yourself, some thing or someone else.
The End is Near? Matthew 24:3-8
"Now as He sat on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to Him privately, saying, "Tell us, when will these things be? And what will be the sign of Your coming, and of the end of the age?" And Jesus answered and said to them: "Take heed that no one deceives you." Matthew 24:3-4
Who will deceive us? Buddist, Muslims, Hidus, Athiest? No! It will be people who profess Jesus is the Christ or Messiah!
"For many will come in My name, saying, 'I am the Christ,' and will deceive many." Matthew 24:5
Jesus also Warned us in Matthew 7:15: "Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly they are ravenous wolves."
"And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilences, and earthquakes in various places. All these are the beginning of sorrows." Matthew 24:6-8
We have all of this now. Israel and Iran are threatening each other with war. Just in the past few years, we've had wars in both Iraq and Afghanistan. Earthquakes are on the increase worldwide causing disastrous tsunamis.
Since the death of Christ, famines worldwide have been constantly on the rise.
1996 North Korean famine. Scholars estimate 600,000 died of starvation (other estimates range from 200,000 to 3.5 million)
1998 Sudan famine caused by war and drought 70,000 dead
1998–2000 Famine in Ethiopia. The situation worsened by Eritrean-Ethiopian War
1998–2004 Second Congo War. 3.8 million dead, mostly from starvation and disease
2000–2009 Zimbabwe's food crisis caused by Mugabe's land reform policies
2003 Famine in Sudan/Darfur
2005 Malawi food crisis
2005–06 Niger food crisis
2006 Horn of Africa food crisis (Somalia, Djibouti, Ethiopia and Kenya)
2008 Myanmar food crisis. Cyclone Nargis devastated Burma's major rice-producing region.
2008 North Korean food crisis
2008 Horn of Africa food crisis (Somalia, Ethiopia and Kenya)
2008 Afghanistan food crisis
2008 Bangladesh food crisis
2008 East Africa food crisis
2008 Tajikistan food crisis
2009 Kenya food crisis 10 million Kenyans face starvation.
2010 Sahell food crisis
2011 Horn of Africa (Somalia and neighboring countries)
Famines, Pestilences and Persecutions
As Food Prices go up as they are doing now: Worldwide Famine is inevitable.
According to the UN, these are the reasons for rising food prices.
Changing weather conditions
The rise in oil prices
Increase in farming of biofuels instead food crops
Increase in the consumption of meat in growing economies such as China
Food riots in some countries are increasing and if something is not done soon many will starve to death.
"We are seeing a new face of hunger. We are seeing more urban hunger than ever before. We are seeing food on the shelves but people being unable to afford it." Josette Sheean, Director of the UN World Food Program
Pestilences – Aids, Cancer, Bird Flu, Swine Flu.
34 million people have hiv aids and nearly 2 million people died last year with more people being infected daily.
In the U.S. Alone 11,958,000 people have Cancer. It is approximated that 31% of the world population suffer from cancer and these numbers are expected to climb to 50%.
Swine Flu, Bird Flu, Staff Infections all highly contagious are all evolving to states where anti-biotics are no longer effective.
"Then they will deliver you up to tribulation and kill you, and you will be hated by all nations for My name's sake. And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another. Then many false prophets will rise up and deceive many. And because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold. But he who endures to the end shall be saved. And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in all the world as a witness to all the nations, and then the end will come." Matthew 24:9-14
According to Voice of The Martyrs, Intolerance toward Christians continued to grow in 2011. In Nigeria 40+ Christians were killed while attending a Christmas Service.
The Government of Iran has declared war on the Christian faith, imprisoning Pastors, clossing churches and putting believers to death.
In Egypt, Iraq, Malaysia, the Philippines and Saudi Arabia, Christians are viewed and treated as second-class citizens. In these countries, believers are being imprisoned, experiencing torture and sexual abuse to try to make them convert to Islam. Christian's homes are also being burned, many believers have been physically attacked and murdered.
In Indonesia, incidents of Christian persecution nearly doubled from 2010 to 2011, and an Islamic extremist group is threatening to have five Christian churches demolished.
In Ethiopia, a group of 500 Muslims burned down a church that stood for over 60 years on land owned by Christians.
This will happen to true believers in America surely as prayer is being taken out of schools and everything with the name of God on public property will be taken down.
Wolves on the Prowl!
Right now many in America follow "Another Gospel" a Gospel with a name in front of it such as the Prosperity Gospel. We build massive mega churches / entertainment centers that cater to every materialistic desire that a believer could have. The preachers tell the people what they want to hear from the pulpit. Many no longer preach against sin or holiness, judgment and repentance instead we've chosen to cater to itching ears to create man made ministries of the flesh.
"For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables." 2 Timothy 4:3-4
"But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." 2 Timothy 3:1-7
"Yes, and all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. But evil men and impostors will grow worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived." 2 Timothy 3:12-13
A Self/Man centered gospel turns God into man's Servant instead of man's Lord. Man through God can get and receive everything he wants, every material blessing, every desire of his heart all in the name of Jesus.
Jesus is reduced down to nothing more than a Sugar Daddy or a Santa Clause type figure.
Things like repentance are ignored as God now becomes a blessing machine.
This is false as Repent is the very thing that Jesus, Paul, The Old Testament Prophets, The Apostles and John the Baptist preached first of all.
Following Christ begins with repentance! Following Christ causes one to deny his self as center of the universe and places God as center of the universe. The love of money is gone, as is the love and desire for the things of this world.
"Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever." 1 John 2:15-17
The Gospel is and always has been: Come to the Cross, Repent, Believe & Deny Yourself.We live for Eternity not temporary material blessings.
"Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21
"If anyone teaches otherwise and does not consent to wholesome words, even the words of our Lord Jesus Christ, and to the doctrine which accords with godliness, he is proud, knowing nothing, but is obsessed with disputes and arguments over words, from which come envy, strife, reviling, evil suspicions, useless wranglings of men of corrupt minds and destitute of the truth, who suppose that godliness is a means of gain. From such withdraw yourself. Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it iscertain we can carry nothing out. And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows." 1 Timothy 6:3-10
How to Spot a Wolf!
The True Gospel leads people to Jesus Christ and to an Eternity with him in Heaven not to cater to the desires of you heart and flesh. A True Christian wants to glorify God not cater to self!
"Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it." Matthew 7:13-14
A Wolf will always Try to Convince you that The Road isn't that Narrow and many are being deceived!
You Will Know Them by Their Fruits
"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thorn bushes or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Therefore by their fruits you will know them." Matthew 7:15-20
False Teachers always appear as Sheep & Angels not Wolves & Devils.If you don't see any, it's because you're looking for the wrong thing.
False Teachers seldom preach self denial, repentance and especially holliness.The devil can imitate a great many things but he can never be holy.
Questions to ask:
Does their teachings appeal to the flesh?
Do they preach the Narrow way?
Do they preach against Sin and encourage Repentance?
Do you hear Humility in their preaching or do you hear pride and arrogance?
Does this person appear Worldly and Carnal, catering to materialism and the desires of the flesh?
At the End of this Life Followers of Wolves and Followers of Men will Hear: "I Never Knew You"
"Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, 'Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?' And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!'" Matthew 7:21-23
Once you've been given the Truth, you can do one of 3 things with it: Accept it, Reject it or Conform it. Rejecting it results in eternal damnation and you get to chase satisfaction your entire life all the while living in the Illusion of Your Best Life Now.
Conforming it results in the same only you've made yourself much more comfortable because you believe you've accepted the Truth but in reality you've only conformed it to your world of greed, pride, materialism or something else. Accepting it is a Narrow Path and only a few find it. It's not easy but you realize that nothing compares to knowing The One True God who created you for His Glory!
"But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them asrubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness, which is from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith; that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if, by any means, I may attain to the resurrection from the dead." Philippians 3:7-11
Slaves to your own Flesh!
We can become slaves to men, slaves to false doctrine all while professing the Name of Jesus. We can also be slaves to our own flesh:
Slavery to Self:
"Do you not know that to whom you present yourselves slaves to obey, you are that one's slaves whom you obey, whether of sin leading to death, or of obedience leading to righteousness? But God be thanked that though you were slaves of sin, yet you obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine to which you were delivered. And having been set free from sin, you became slaves of righteousness. I speak in human terms because of the weakness of your flesh. For just as you presented your members as slaves of uncleanness, and of lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves of righteousness for holiness.
For when you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. What fruit did you have then in the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. But now having been set free from sin, and having become slaves of God, you have your fruit to holiness, and the end, everlasting life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:16-22
We must ask ourselves: Are we followers of Christ or are we followers of man!The truth is many of us profess Christ but we are slaves to the very flesh that we walk in.
"Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Do you not know yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you are disqualified." 2 Corinthians 13:5
"Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure." Phillipians 2:12-13


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The photograph above, taken in October
1998, shows the spot where the barracks of the Plaszow concentration
camp once stood. The Camp Commandant, Amon Goeth, lived in a
house that is out of camera range in this picture; it is located
to the right and behind a hill so that it cannot be seen from
this spot. The camp was surrounded by houses on three sides and
on the fourth side was a major road.
To reach the site of the former Plaszow
camp, 10 kilometers from the city center of Krakow, we drove
up a hill on a rutted one-lane dirt road, thinly covered with
small white granite rocks. The road reminded me of a road up
to a cemetery that I had visited in my youth, and I soon learned
that this was also the site of a Jewish cemetery before the Nazis
made it into a labor camp. The granite quarries near this location
were at that time owned by a Jew, but the Nazis confiscated the
property, without compensation, for their labor camp. There was
a Jewish mortuary chapel near the cemetery, which the Nazis converted
into a stable. This was not the first time that a Jewish place
of worship was used by the Nazis as a stable.
The location of the Plaszow camp on the
site of two Jewish cemeteries afforded building materials for
the Nazis in the construction of the camp. Although crushed granite
from the quarry was readily available, the Nazis desecrated Jewish
graves by ripping out the tombstones, then using slabs of the
broken grave stones to pave the camp roads, like stepping stones
in a garden, as pictured in the movie Schindler's List.
The construction of the Plaszow camp
began in June 1942. A guidebook which I purchased at the Eagle
Pharmacy museum in Podgorze, not far from the Plaszow camp, states:
"According to the Heydrich plan the Plaszow camp and its
sub camps were meant to constitute a stage in the concentration
of the Jews deported to the East. The camp was built on the area
of two cemeteries at Jerozolimska and Abrahama street. The location
of the camp -- near the Plaszow railroad station -- made the
access to communication tracks relatively easy." The "Heydrich
plan" was a reference to the conference which SS officer
Reinhard Heydrich led on January 20, 1942 at Wannsee, a suburb
of Berlin. This is where plans were made for the "Final
Solution of the Jewish Question."
By July 1944, the Russians had advanced
into Poland, as the Germans retreated. Majdanek was the first
Nazi camp to be liberated by the Russians on July 23, 1944; it
was now necessary for the German occupation government to begin
the liquidation of the Plaszow camp. The bodies of 8,000 prisoners,
who had died in the camp, were dug up and burned, according to
the author of the novel, Schindler's List. The barracks were
dismantled and sent to other camps along with the camp records.
The Plaszow prisoners were transferred to other camps, the last
transport leaving on Jan. 12, 1945 just three days before the
Red Army liberated Krakow.
According to my tour guide, the Germans
fought a fierce battle with the Russians in the city of Krakow.
It was so cold that the Vistula river was frozen over. Dead German
soldiers littered the streets of Krakow when the battle was finished.
According to the tour guide, their bodies were buried by the
citizens of Krakow.
Schindler's factory in Krakow, which
was a sub-camp of the Plaszow camp, had to be liquidated along
with the concentration camp as the Germans retreated. To save
his Jewish workers from being sent to other camps, Schindler
bribed Nazi officials to let him set up a new factory sub-camp
in Brinnlitz near his home town of Zwittau in Moravia, a province
of the former country of Czechoslovakia. At that time, Moravia
was a protectorate of Germany.
In the movie Schindler's List, Oskar
Schindler was allowed to select 1,100 Jews for his new factory,
after bribing the Nazis with diamonds, ham and liquor. The male
prisoners of Plaszow were sent to Gross-Rosen, a concentration
camp that was also built near a quarry; it had 103 sub-camps
and Schindler's factory became the 104th. Gross-Rosen is now
in Poland, but at that time, it was in the Greater German Reich.
The female prisoners at Plaszow were sent to Auschwitz II or
Birkenau, including Schindler's Jews, because they had to wait
until Schindler's new sub-camp was built.
By 1944, the whole Plaszow camp had become
a hotbed of corruption with black market trading in stolen goods
by the inmates and by the Commandant, Amon Goeth. The prisoners
were selling the bread, provided by the Nazis for the camp, to
Polish civilians outside the camp and the price had finally reached
diamonds as currency, according to the novel Schindler's List.
When Oskar Schindler was granted permission
to draw up a list of 1,100 slave workers for his new Brinnlitz
factory in what is now the Czech Republic, a Jewish prisoner
named Marcel Goldberg was put in charge of the names, according
to the novel. Goldberg asked for bribes from those who wanted
on the list and the price was paid in "stolen treasures,"
mostly diamonds. There was a jewelry factory at Plaszow where
the prisoners had an an opportunity to steal diamonds. At the
end of the list, Goldberg put his own name. There were 800 men
and 300 women on Schindler's List; some had also gotten on the
list by making threats to Goldberg, according to the novel. Oskar
Schindler didn't know all the names of his 1200 factory workers,
and had never spoken to most of them.
At the age of 29, Mini Reinhardt became
Schindler's secretary in October 1944; she had previously been
working in a labor camp near Krakow. In an interview with the
Israeli daily newspaper Ha'aretz in December 2007, Reinhardt
said "I only typed the list. I did what I was told."
According to her interview with a Ha'aretz
reporter, Reinhardt was born in Vienna in 1915, but at the age
of 21 married a Jew from Krakow and moved to the Polish city.
The couple had a son in June 1939, but three months later the
war broke out. Son Sascha was smuggled with his grandmother to
Hungary, where he survived the war, but her husband was shot
while trying to escape from the Krakow ghetto and she was sent
to a labor camp.
Reinhardt told the Ha'aretz reporter
that it was a "gamble" when she decided to join Schindler
at his new factory near his home town.
The following quote is from the Ha'aretz
The gamble almost proved fatal, when
the Nazis sent the train with the 1,100 workers to the Auschwitz
death camp, where she spent 10 days that she described as "straight
from the hell of Dante."
But Schindler went out of his way
to persuade the camp authorities to release his workers to his
new ammunition factory, threatening to accuse them with Nazi
authorities in Berlin of "sabotaging the war effort."
Reinhardt rejected speculation by
some that his motivations were opportunistic, being driven initially
by money while his eventual rescue operation was an attempt to
better himself as it became clear the Germans were about to lose
the war.
"He wasn't an angel," she
told Ha'aretz, pointing out he was a member of the SS and at
nights had drinks with the highest ranks of the Nazi force.
But, she added, "I saw a man
who constantly risked his life for what he did. He was a Mensch.
He must have had a heart of gold."
The photo below shows what is left of
the barbed wire fence which formerly surrounded the Plaszow camp.
The tour guide told me that there were houses built right up
to this fence when the camp was in operation. The camp was built
right next to the village of Plaszow which was on the Ostbahn
railroad line running through Krakow.


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text:
do FFox without SSE2 ?
Discussion of third-party/unofficial Firefox/Thunderbird/SeaMonkey builds.
12 posts • Page 1 of 1
Hi ! Please help with a dual question here,
1. Is Firefox - official build - installable and usable
on a AMD 32-bit X86 processor that doesn't have SSE2,
viz. Athlon XP ?
2. If, unfortunately, the answer to above be negative,
are there 3rd-party/unofficial builds that do support my machine,
and where can I find them ?
answer for question 1: official firefox releases still work on CPUs w/out SSE2 - just tried out Firefox 40 stable release and then Firefox 41 beta 3 a few weeks ago on an old Compaq computer with AMD Athlon XP 3200+ 2.2Ghz CPU and those Firefox versions still run okay. that may change with the firefox releases sometime next year where they may not run correctly on CPUs w/out SSE2
answer for question 2: answer is NO. you will not find any 3rd party unofficial firefox builds w/out SSE2 support. you will have to upgrade your computer (aka. replace the motherboard that can accept newer & faster CPUs that include SSE2 support such as Intel Pentium 4 hyperthread, AMD Athlon 64 / Sempron 64 or faster
That is not entirely correct. I tried Firefox 40 on an Athlon XP 3200+ based computer running Windows 7, and it was unusable. Even with an empty profile and displaying a blank page, Firefox periodically used 100% CPU and became unresponsive.
There was a hint that it could have something to do with Sync. But that should not apply to an empty profile with no Sync set up at all.
And that's not correct as well. You can find a Pale Moon third-party build for computers without SSE2 on http://www.romanstefko.com/pale-moon-sse/
I have run this version on the Athlon XP 3200+ based computer mentioned above and it worked fine. There are only a few drawbacks related to the fact that it is Pale Moon. Its author decided not to keep up with the Firefox development so he uses a rather old code base. Even if he is informed about annoying bugs, updates to Pale Moon can take quite some time.
Example: Current versions of Pale Moon crash on http://web.whatsapp.com/ . The reason was already identified a month ago but still no update.
Another nuisance is the Sync feature. Pale Moon uses an older version of Sync with its own central server. This server is repeatedly offline, and it can take up to several weeks until the problems are fixed.
But apart from that, you will get a fast browser for your old machine if you use Pale Moon there. Another alternative (even faster) is K-meleon: http://kmeleonbrowser.org/
Drawback there: It is complicated to install add-ons, and most Firefox add-ons do not work at all with K-Meleon.
Kind regards,
You can use official edition directly, which is more faster and stable than any other 3rd-party build without SSE2 build.
Best Regards,
Firefox official edition does not run any more on an Athlon XP 3200+.
Since version 38, Firefox periodically uses 100% CPU and becomes unresponsive. This happens even with an empty profile and no page loaded. I guess that there is some program module which cannot run on processors without SSE2. Thanks to Intel, today all compilers are configured by default to build programs which require SSE2. You will have to manually switch that option off in the makefiles. As there is no programmer in the world using non-SSE2 computers any more, they will not actively do that.
Kind regards,
Just curious: Will there be a possibility to add a German locale to PCXfirefox? That would be great indeed.
Thank you
pcxFirefox is compatible with official edition, so you can use the official language locale pack directly.
Best Regards,
doing Firefox w/out SSE2 is no longer possible starting with Firefox 49 as that version was created using Microsoft Visual Studio 2015 Update 2, which requires SSE2 support and kills support for "legacy" CPUs like Intel Pentium 3s & earlier and AMD K7 based CPUs (AthlonXP/Sempron K7) & older.
But Firefox 48.0.x are the last ones to seemingly support CPUs below Intel Pentium 4 & AMD K8 (Athlon 64/Sempron 64).
Indeed - Firefox 49 officially kills support for CPUs w/out SSE2 as noted in the release notes:
You missed the Firefox 45 ESR option as it is currently supported with updates and does still run on CPU's that does not support SSE2.
Anyways this thread is over a year old and the OP never did post again.
Seems that he has either passed away or got a brand new computer with SSE2 support now and does not care any more
As there is no support for non-SSE2 CPUs by Windows any more (beginning with 8.1, Windows requires a newer processor) it also becomes more and more impossible to still run those machines these days.
Kind regards,
"more and more impossible" is illogical. "More difficult" is not. My system has a Pentium II running at 266Mhz with Windows XP. Very useful and reliable. (I am composing this reply on it) Yes, I have other, faster machines.
Thanks for the links to the 'FireFox' variants. I shall try them.
(When this machine dies it will probably get replaced with a Raspberry Pi)
Thanks but locking this due to old age.
Ancient Amateur Astronomer
Win-7-HP/Intel® DualCore-2.0GHz/500G HDD/4 Gig Ram/550Watt PSU/350WattUPS/Firefox-20.0-57.0-61.0-62.0/T-bird-22.214.171.124/SnagIt-v10.0.1/MWP-7.11.0.
(Always choose the "Custom" Install.)
12 posts • Page 1 of 1
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text: Hi, I'm going to print a passport photo from a photo printing shop. In photoshop I've placed 4 35mm x 45mm pictures in a 4'x6' document. My question is what DPI did these places support is it 300 or 600? Its for my gf who isn't happy with the ones taken in the photo booth.


text:
Thursday, November 13, 2008
rough drawings
I've been trying to develope a technique for storyboarding where I draw rough, but it's clean enough that I don't have to go back and clean it up. This is sort of how I've been drawing. It's really fun, and makes you a lot better at drawing, because you can't "find" the drawing in the clean up, you have to make really strong decisions from the beginning.
Posted by rad sechrist at 1:54 PM
3 comments:
- flaviano said...
i had the same thought. anyway great drawings also on the previous post!
- November 20, 2008 at 9:38 AM
- Jason Scheier said...
nice drawings man!
- November 26, 2008 at 12:02 AM
- Alex said...
very interesting idea!
- November 27, 2008 at 9:22 PM
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text:
St. John's celebrated its 112th anniversary on Monday, January 18, 2016.
At the same time, we also bade farewell to Mr. Mustafa Kamal, the former PK HEM now promoted as PK Tadbir and Kurikulum in SMK Taman Desa.
The guest-of-honour for the birthday celebration was Mr. Michael Simon, President of the Malaysian Federation of La Sallian Alumni Associations.
As early as 7am, invited guests began arriving at the Board of Governors room to sign the visitors' book.
At 7.45am, the guests were ushered to the assembly area, accompanied by the bagpipes. After the Negaraku and state anthem, a series of speeches followed, starting with the School Captain.
Next to speak was Dr. M. Puvanendran, Principal of St. John's. He was then followed by Mr. Mustafa Kamal who addressed St. John's for the last time.
Last to take the podium was Mr. Michael Simon, the guest-of-honour for the birthday celebration. In his speech, Mr. Michael placed forth a challenge to Tuan Megat Mizan Nicholas Denney, the Chairman of the Board of Governors, to reinstate St. John's as an English-medium school to arrest the slide in English proficiency among students.
The school was then brought down memory lane with a presentation on the 112 illustrious years under the various Directors, put up by the prefects.
The grand finale of the event was the cutting of the cake. This year, every class brought a cake to the celebration and the cakes were cut after the singing of the birthday song.
It was indeed an exciting day for all Johannians, and it was good to see a number of old boys attending the birthday celebration this year.
Here's to a great year in St. John's.
Happy birthday, St. John's, and may God bless you always!


text:
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Useful Contacts
Wessex Christian Fellowship
Answer Phone Only
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text:
Friday, April 30, 2010
Caught With My Pants Down
I enjoyed a post over at Jinksy's the other day. It was an amusing poem about a Hippo, which put me in mind of an encounter of my own I'd once had with one
My first trip to Kenya was on our honeymoon, when, after a week in the Seychelles, we spent a further two weeks travelling on safari, through the beautiful plains of the Masai Mara.
We covered vast distances in a beaten up mini-van, driven by our wise, and ever patient guide, Lawrence. We did not drive in a convoy, nor did he have any radio contact to summon help should we need it. This was long before the days of mobile phones, and we were literally on our own between lodges. Lawrence kept a loaded rifle with him at all times, which he assured us was only as a precaution. As we were in a protected game reserve, I have no idea if this practise was actually legal, perhaps it was.
An experienced guide, he had a set route to take us over, including enough basic comfort stops to keep us hydrated, fed and able to relieve ourselves. Did I say "basic"? It often turned out the latter facility proved far less inviting than the lure of going it alone, behind the brush, at least there you could still breathe un-fetid air whilst your pants were down.
The Flamenco's in Lake Nakeru are a wonderful sight, thousands upon thousands of birds feed and thrive in and around it's waters, but this day I found myself slightly distracted from the enjoyment, being as how I'd urgently found myself in the need of a pee.
Trouble was, there was little, if any, cover, and although the lake was sparsely populated by humans, modesty still prevented me from squatting to a "back-turned" audience comprising of my new husband, our guide, and the elderly couple we had in tow.
Ever the gentleman, hubby had a word in Lawrence's ear, and he promptly loaded us back to the van, where he drove a few miles up-river, to a suitable growth of vegetation where I could take cover.
Ah, the relief!
Barely mid-way through, I raise my head – and – oh, for the love of God, find myself virtually nose-to-nose with an enormous Hippopotamus. Now, Hippo's may look cute from a distance, but they are deadly to cross. Fiercely territorial at the best of times, this one also had her baby by her side, and she had her maw opened wide at me, exposing a ferocious array of bone-crunching teeth.
I prepared to meet my maker.
An ear-splitting shot rang out over my head. Immediately behind my bum-exposed back, stood Lawrence, rifle locked and levelled, he was focused stock still, staring down the sights into the wide jaws of this giant, posturing mother. Frozen where I squat, knickers around my ankles, I hardly dared breathe.
Lawrence shifted to point his rifle to the sky, releasing a second shot. It worked. Lumbering around, she slowly crashed through the underbrush, baby in tow, heading back to the the lake.
He later confided his rifle would have probably proved a pitiful match should she have decided to attack. Besides, by then he was clean out of bullets!
Despite this narrow escape, before returning home, we made ourselves a promise to return to Africa one day, perhaps next time to take our future children along with us. A couple of years back, we fulfilled that promise, and took our four off-spring on Safari there, to re-trace our footsteps.
An exceptional man touched our lives over the course of that last trip, one we shall never forget.
Whilst there, our children were both thrilled and delighted to uncover the original old guest book, at the library in "Tree Tops", which I'd long ago mistakenly signed, then crossed out, in my maiden name. Underneath, I'd entered my brand new, married one.
It felt strange to see that, after all those years. The past merged into the present, I felt as if I were meeting my twenty-nine year old self again.
The future, which had seemed so certain then, was to map out so very differently from the one I'd had planned. I felt an impossible urge to reach down through the years, to seek out and to reassure my younger self, tell her to keep hanging on in there and believing, because despite ALL of what was yet still to come, it has eventually come out alright(ish) in the end.
63 comments:
- Charlene said...
WOW that is a great story.
- April 30, 2010 at 6:01 PM
- Leslie: said...
Riveting! Cannot imagine the shock of looking up at those teeth. Good thing Lawrence was there. whew!
- April 30, 2010 at 6:03 PM
- Chantel said...
The more I learn about you, the more I wish you were my neighbor.
Simple as that.
- April 30, 2010 at 6:08 PM
- Akelamalu said...
What a heartstopping moment that must have been!
I love it that you returned and found the guestbook you signed as a newlywed - how romantic. :)
Wasn't Tree Tops where the Queen learned of her father's (the king) death and her succession to the throne?
- April 30, 2010 at 6:28 PM
- Michelle H. said...
Great story and a wonderful trip through your photos of Kenya. The memories you have: excitement, romance, danger. It almost feels like a movie.
- April 30, 2010 at 6:40 PM
- YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...
you lived my dream..sigh*
- April 30, 2010 at 6:56 PM
- TechnoBabe said...
A hippopotamus would be enough to cause you have to squat again!! The honeymoon sounds wonderful though and what a great present to your family to take all children with you on a safari.
- April 30, 2010 at 8:35 PM
- Sniffles and Smiles said...
What an incredible story! You have lived such a full life! I'm in awe! So much writing material! And these photos are absolutely fantastic! This is a fabulous post...I would not have missed it for the world! Love, Janine XO
- April 30, 2010 at 9:24 PM
- Milton said...
Great tale :). Bit of a heart stopping moment that - pants down and face-to-face with Mummy hippo! Fabby pix and I loved the tale about the tour guide. You're a really good story teller.
Milt x
- April 30, 2010 at 10:17 PM
- billy pilgrim said...
wow, i haven't seen reggie perrin's mother-in-law in ages.
- April 30, 2010 at 10:54 PM
Be careful where you "mark your territory" others may have already staked their claim.
- May 1, 2010 at 12:33 AM
- Scott from Oregon said...
I just had the rhinovirus, so I can totally relate!!
- May 1, 2010 at 5:20 AM
- Shrinky said...
Cheers Charlene, it was quite an adventure (smile).
Hi Leslie, later that week, whilst we were sipping cocktails back at the lodge one evening, four guides ran to their Jeep brandishing their rifles, they were part of a search party looking for two missing tourists who had decided to take a "do-it-alone" safari. We found out the following morning they had been killed, mauled and half eaten!
Chantel, I would be happy to swap you over for mine, anyday (hugs)!
Yes Ake, it was! Princess Elizabeth was staying there when she received the news her father had died, and she was to be queen. It's an amazing place, nestled and built into the trees, above a watering hole. We stayed up all night watching the animals come to drink below - and were lucky enough to spot a white rhino. On our return visit, we were told there were no longer any white rhino's left in the area, they had been moved in an effort to conserve the species.
I guess the older we get, Michelle, the more memories and adventures we experience along the way. But given the choice, I think I'd still stick with youth, any day (wink)!
Ah Jackie, just wait til Anthony Banderos finds you, he'll whisk you there in no time!
Yeah TechnoBabe, it was pretty special to make that second pilgrimage back there (smile).
I've been very blessed, Janine, but not all my adventures have ended quite so well, believe me!
Aw, thanks Milton, and for taking the time to read about Kikoo, he was a pretty amazing guy, wasn't he?
Hey Billy, they brought out a new series of that this year, with Matin Clunes in the starring role - has it reached your shores yet? Despite all the fears it would be a poor imitation of the original, it turned out realy well!
Scott, I have no idea what rhinovirus is, but it sounds awful - I trust you are fully recovered by now?
- May 1, 2010 at 11:19 AM
- Fen said...
HA HA thrilling and scary at the same time, awesome story. I've never been to Africa, I hope to some day.
- May 1, 2010 at 12:23 PM
- Paul C said...
Riveting story like out of the movies...
- May 1, 2010 at 1:28 PM
- Shrinky said...
Hi Fen, I did a fair amount of travelling before the children came along, including a wonderful visit to your own continent, which I fell head-over-heels in love with! But I still haven't been to India, Russia or to China yet - they are on my check-list, I do still hope to make it there, one day..
Hello Paul, it feels it happened another lifetime ago, now (sigh).
- May 1, 2010 at 2:59 PM
- Skunkfeathers said...
I'd a thought that the "pause that refreshes" would have had a sudden onset of "needs repeating" coming mug to mug widda tweaked hippo.
But then, I chase tornadic thunderstorms, and occasionally encounter an "open maw" of my own.
At any rate, a great story, and other than one 'relieving' moment, a great memory.
- May 1, 2010 at 11:07 PM
- laughingwolf said...
lucky indeed!
more people are killed each year by hippos than by lions and elephants combined!
- May 1, 2010 at 11:52 PM
- Postman said...
Now THERE'S a story for the grandkids. Clever last line, too...
- May 2, 2010 at 1:00 AM
- Nancy said...
Lovely photos and an amazing story!
- May 2, 2010 at 5:08 AM
- Shrinky said...
Hi Skunk, oh wow, you a storm-chaser? Crikey, that must really be something to get the old heart pumping!
Is that so, Laughingwolf? I had no idea - yikes! Guess I was even luckier than I realised, then..
Cheers Postman, funny thing is, I'd all but forgotten about the encounter, up until I saw Jinsky's post!
Thanks Nancy, I'm glad I am still here to tell you the tale (smile).
- May 2, 2010 at 1:00 PM
- Sling said...
Your photos are absolutely amazing!
The tale of your Hippo encounter seems humorous now,but Holy Crap!..Hippos are the most dangerous animals to humans in Africa..It must have been terrifying.
- May 2, 2010 at 7:40 PM
- Sniffles and Smiles said...
Just had to stop by one more time while this post is still up! Such spectacular photos! I have to enjoy them one more time! Love you so much! One of these days, I'm gonna get to your side of the pond again...and you and I will cause some serious trouble in town ;-) Love you,Janine XO
- May 2, 2010 at 9:57 PM
ah-hum (clearing throat) You skipped over my comment. Have you pulled your pants up yet?
- May 3, 2010 at 12:01 AM
- secret agent woman said...
I vividly remember having to take a potty break by the river on the Serengeti, keeping a wary eye on the hipppos and crocs. It's an adventure, all rught!
- May 3, 2010 at 3:26 AM
- SJ said...
I wonder what the hippo has to say about that encounter.
- May 3, 2010 at 5:52 AM
- Shrinky said...
Sling, ignorance, in this case, was bliss - I knew I was in trouble, but had no idea just how much (grin)!
OMG, Janine, now wouldn't that be something? Do you really think you will? How long is it since you were last here? I'd love for you to come and visit the fam (grin)! Just holler!
Oh Chewy-Pie, I am so sorry, what on earth was I thinking - I'd never overlook you on purpose, but this you know (huggles), I hereby stand corrected! And, um, I gave up on pants years ago - wink..
Hi there Secret Agent, wouldn't it be funny if we were there on the same safari together, at the time? Stranger things have happened!
SJ, what ever he wants to is fine by me, I'm not about to debate anything he says..!
- May 3, 2010 at 8:53 AM
- Land of shimp said...
I think TechnoBabe got it right, at least you were in the correct position to have that encounter, as that is likely the position you'd need to assume anyway.
I know a fair number of people who have been to Africa, to the last, they all have a story about Hippos and peeing. No kidding. Evidently if you are on safari and desperately wish to see a Hippo? Cop a squat. Works like a charm, from what I can tell.
Another friend taught me the "Scary, scary Hippos!" song she used to sing, every night as she tried to find her way to the "pee tent" (and doesn't that sound charming).
I asked her if it ever occurred to her that singing the Scary Hippo song was what was attracting them ;-)
Glad you survived your Hippo encounter, and yes, they are massive, and not all that adorable up close. Evidently they can be quite lethal. I'm glad you lived to pee another day!
- May 3, 2010 at 4:36 PM
- R. Ramesh said...
wow..awesome blog..congrats friend:)
- May 3, 2010 at 4:40 PM
- Hilary said...
Yikes, Shrinky! What a great story and wonderful photos. I'm sure glad though that we're not hearing about this hippopotamus posthumously. (Say that three times fast!)
- May 3, 2010 at 6:43 PM
- simon said...
great post.. yes life rarely turns out how we plan it....
- May 4, 2010 at 7:03 AM
- Shrinky said...
Hello R. Ramesh, how nice of you to pop by, thank you for your lovely comment!
Ha! Yes Hilary, that's quite a mouthful.. and um, you are not half as glad as I am (grin)!
Hi Simon, at least it keeps it interesting, eh?
- May 4, 2010 at 8:41 AM
- Suldog said...
Wonderful tale, Shrinky. And great photos to go with it.
Did you ever read my account of having eaten a hippopotamus? Perhaps it was the one who terrorized you, and you can take some solace in the fact that she got her comeuppance.
- May 4, 2010 at 9:32 PM
- Shrinky said...
Oh Jim, that post is just too funny for words, I'm still laughing - thanks for the link. I am sure more readers would apprecieate a viewing, it's too good not to re-post!
- May 5, 2010 at 9:05 AM
- slommler said...
Beautiful story! I just can't imagine how you would feel looking into that wide maw! I wouldn't have to pee any longer; I know that! What a terrifying encounter and then to have someone shooting around you! Oh my!!!
And how wonderful that you could literally share this experience with your children. Very cool!
Congrats on your POTW
- May 5, 2010 at 11:04 AM
- järnebrand said...
Hippos look kinda cute from a distance, I think, but I would be terrified if I faced one up close... No hippos here in Sweden except for in zoos though... :)
Loved your post. Gorgeous pics!
Hugs/ Jo.
- May 5, 2010 at 12:25 PM
- Brian Miller said...
oh what an amazing story....i would love to go on safari...the close up with the hippo was a bit much but...smiles
congrats ont he POTW!
- May 5, 2010 at 12:49 PM
- Jingle said...
awesome lines.
I wish I can go on the safari.
I used to watch kids do it on PBS TV show.
- May 5, 2010 at 1:36 PM
- Shrinky said...
Slommier, it did realise a dream to re-visit there with our children (smile). Post of the Week? Oh my, I had no idea!
Hi Jo, no, we have no hippo's in our river, either (thank goodness)! Thank you.
Haha, Brian, I think the encounter with a hippo is optional (wink)!
Hi Jingle, thanks for stopping by. I hope you may make it there still, one day, eh?
- May 5, 2010 at 1:56 PM
- Cricket said...
Great post and congratulations on the potw.
I've spent 90% of my life within 50 miles of Boston, and 50% of that within walking distance of my house. It's always fascinating to hear the stories of people who do not live that way.
On the other hand, I've never been threatened by an angry hippo - good or bad, I guess, depending on how you look at it.
I suppose that having this happen while you were already squatting, pants down, might have spared you another indignity of sorts ;-)
- May 5, 2010 at 2:43 PM
- R. said...
I'm guessing when you returned to Africa and retraced your steps, there must have been the now grown Hippo (ie the former cub), hiding behind the bushes, pointing you to his/her friend, saying "You won't believe what happened the last time I saw her! She scared mommy away!", the other one must be nodding saying "WOW!"
Great Post!
- May 5, 2010 at 4:10 PM
- Denise said...
What a fantastic story, along with some amazing photographs. Enjoyed your post very much, thank you!
- May 5, 2010 at 4:17 PM
- Land of shimp said...
Stopping back by to say congratulations on the post of the week mention over at Hilary's blog, Shrinky!
And to kick blogger in the shins, because it ate my first comment this morning.
- May 5, 2010 at 5:17 PM
- billy pilgrim said...
i haven't seen the new series. it was c.j. that cracked me up in the old series.
- May 5, 2010 at 6:04 PM
- PhilipH said...
Quality AND quantity would be my take on this exceptionally engaging post.
Superb photos and words to match.
- May 5, 2010 at 7:24 PM
- Daryl said...
Congrats on the POTW mention from Hilary
- May 5, 2010 at 7:30 PM
- deb said...
congrats on the POTW,
this is such an incredible and moving story.
I'm so struck by the adventure... so nice to "meet" you and look forward to reading more here.
- May 5, 2010 at 11:44 PM
- Matt Conlon said...
Love hippos. One of my first dates with my now wife many years ago, we sat at my place and watched a hippo national geographic. Any creature that can bite an allegator in half is worthy of respect in my book.
- May 6, 2010 at 2:04 AM
- Jingle said...
thanks for the beautiful job!
please visit me via the link for new meme or awards.
thank you for following!
- May 6, 2010 at 3:30 AM
- Life with Kaishon said...
This post was so interesting. Each paragraph and picture opened a new surprise. Well written for certain.
- May 6, 2010 at 5:02 AM
- LadyFi said...
Amazing photos - and wow! What a story!
- May 6, 2010 at 5:07 AM
- Joanna Jenkins said...
I. LOVE. THIS. POST! Awesome job--so well told. My knees were shaking for you.
- May 6, 2010 at 5:12 AM
- Joanna Jenkins said...
PS Congrats on Hilary's Post Of The Week Mention! Woo-hoo! Well done.
- May 6, 2010 at 5:16 AM
Oh my gosh! Its a good thing you'd already gone pee or you would have piddled in your unders! lol
- May 6, 2010 at 8:03 AM
- Shrinky said...
Billy, they updated the series to set it in present day, and Jack Dee (from memory, I think it was him) played the CJ character - I'm sure you could catch a clip on youtube..?
Hi Phillip, how lovely to see you again! Aw, such kind words, thank you my friend.
- May 6, 2010 at 11:04 AM
- Shrinky said...
Cricket, I rather envy folk who live and work in the place they were raised, the sense of belonging and deep roots must be wonderful - whenever I visit with a dear friend of mine, I see all the support, close family, and friends she has known all her life, and think she is truly blessed!
R, oh, what a wonderful thought, too funny (still laughing), such a thought! Thanks for stopping by.
Hi Denise, nice to see you in here! It's strange how you forget somethings - it had clean slipped off my mind up until I read Jinksy's post.
Oh Shimp, I HATE when that happens - thanks for taking the trouble to come back and try again!
Cheers Daryl, thanks for popping over.
Hi Deb, how nice to make your acquaintance, thanks for coming by (smile).
Gee Matt, that sounds one hell of a romantic first date (giggle). Can they really snap an aligator in half? Sheesh!
- May 6, 2010 at 11:17 AM
- Shrinky said...
Hi Jingle, you are very welcome.
Hello, welcome back, Life with Kaishon, good to see you again!
Hello LadyFi, you are very kind (smile) - thanks for the encouraging words.
Welcome home, Joanna, hope you had a great trip? Yeah, it sure was a heart stopping moment or two..
Blue Zoo, I'm surprised I didn't crap myself, too!
- May 6, 2010 at 11:26 AM
- imbeingheldhostage said...
You tell such a great adventure story!
I'm over here a lot Shrinky, but in my limited time I usually read and run-- sometimes I read and come back to finish. I'm reading about Kikoo now :-) Didn't want you to think I had turned lurker.
- May 7, 2010 at 10:03 AM
- Steve Gravano said...
What a great adventure story and to be able to visit a second time is a blessing. Love the photos too!
- May 8, 2010 at 3:29 PM
- Shrinky said...
aw, life is like that, imbeingheldhostage, it happens that way for all us at times! It's great to see you again, I've kind of been dragging my heels too, with my blog visits as of late (cringe)..
Hey Steve, how nice to make your acquaintance! Yes, the second visit realised a dream for us (smile).
- May 8, 2010 at 4:43 PM
- Anna said...
Shrinky this is very inspiring story, and boy the encounter with the hippo. My husband and me, we said we will be back to Greece after our honeymoon, but it didn't happen yet, and with Matthew I don't think it will happen for another 10 years. But I would love to travel to Africa like you did, may be I can convince him, lol, which may be impossible, lol. Anna :)
- May 12, 2010 at 3:03 AM
- B.T.Bear (esq.) said...
pants down! hehehehe!
Wat a good post!
- May 13, 2010 at 1:25 AM
- Shrinky said...
Oh Anna, I am sure you will return one day, when your Matthew is old enough to remember it (we waited until our youngest was 11 for this pilgrimage). You have oodles of time on your side!
Aw Bob, I might have guessed that would catch your funny bone (giggle)!
- May 13, 2010 at 8:19 AM


text:
side b, 224 kbps, 47:38, 78 mb
(direct downloads)
some more (kevin ayers, david bedford, lol coxhill, mike oldfield, mick fincher, ollie halsall, archie leggett, chris spedding, robert wyatt, brian eno... [just kidding...]): may i?
many wondrtful sonic gems!
great blog
Nice to hear from you. Lovely tape. Gunnar / Neglected Stairways || Austin Texas
I've never heard of June Campbell, but since Lol Coxhill is ringing some tubular bells, I don't hesitate to thank you for this - and am rather curious what this will sound like...
Thanks also for some previous shares - I will link to your site and hope that it's OK for you.
oh those filthy rotten spammers!
don't let them bring you down - erase, and that's it!
Wow!!! Totally beautiful and surprising. Thank you! Really made my day.
This isn't what is claimed (and I've tried both versions). It's this
recorded at a cafe in Deya in '78 (hence the cafe chatter and Spanish speaking).
But you've scanned a very convincing looking cassette cover for the ICES '72 recordings. A mis-upload perhaps?
Oh, yes, and check out
lady june is up and downloadable again: but please read the comments: this might not be what it says....


text:
Should I tell an alcoholic they are in denial?
What is the psychological state of denial?
"Denial" is a term that we use in modern language quite often. People "deny" or prohibit themselves from certain actions. You can be "in denial" of your true behaviors or feelings. Or we can make an event smaller in our head in order to feel better about it. But what is denial? And when are people in denial?
Psychologists use the word DENIAL to describe the state of mind some people use to cope with reality. Theorists such as Anna and Sigmund Freud believed that we use denial to protect the immature ego self from feelings of guilt, anxiety or inferiority. In the most basic sense (and what's important for our discussion here), denial is the insistence that a known fact is false, even in the face of overwhelming evidence that the fact is true. And further, denial is the refusal to acknowledge what has, is, or will happen.
How do you know an alcoholic is in denial?
The general existence of denial is fairly easy to confirm, even for non-specialists or people untrained in psychology. In fact, most alcoholics will reject the fact that they have a problem with drinking at all. As alcoholics further develop dependence on alcohol, they also progress from inattention to willful blindness of problem drinking, a defense system that allows them to ignore the problem. Instead, alcoholics tend to blame problems related to drinking on something or someone else.
Signs of alcoholism denial
- annoyance with criticism about drinking
- blaming other people or situations for personal problems related to drinking
- expressions of guilt about drinking
- inability to honestly answer questions about the amount of drinking
- inability to honestly answer questions about frequency of drinking
- rejection that more than five drinks (for men) or four drinks (for women) in one day is too much
Denial is also a social force
Recognizing and accepting an alcohol problem is the first step toward getting better. But denial of alcoholism symptoms is fairly common. For example, even when people experience withdrawal symptoms from alcohol, they nearly always deny that they have a drinking problem. This defense mechanism ultimately leaves it up to co-workers, friends, or relatives to recognize symptoms and to encouraging alcoholism treatment. This can be tricky.
Anthropologists suggest that the ability to look the other way, while potentially destructive, is also critically important to forming and nourishing close relationships. Sometimes, it is wise to manage a difficult person or personal situation by ignoring a problem but other times silence can bother our conscience.
When should I confront an alcoholic about problem drinking?
Unfortunately, there is no common denominator for addressing a person in denial of alcoholism about problem drinking. This is because each situation is different, each potential alcoholic and friends/family/colleagues are different. But your decision will probably be based on a few factors:
- how much you care for the person
- how close you feel to the person
- how confident you are that a drinking problem exists (ability to give examples)
- how comfortable you feel with conflict
- your communication skills
Ultimately, ONLY YOU can know when to inform someone about problem drinking. Your conscience will guide you. And so will best practices for alcoholism interventions. Click here to learn more about alcoholic intervention techniques. And leave your messages, questions or comments below. We are here to help.
Reference sources: Patient education about alcoholism diagnosis, University of Maryland Medical Center
NYTimes Varieties of Denial, 2007
Leave a Reply
I have to say that alcoholism is something that can not only destroy the person but will also put the famiily and friends through a lot of pain.
I believe that a person in denial is difficult to reach… and, it is impossible to help someone who does not want to be helped.
Telling someone that they are in denial might plant a seed, but normally it will go in one ear and out the other.
For those that do come out of denial, they can stop alcoholism.
Thanks for the article!
My husband is a binge drinker. I can say that quite confidently as I did the research on his behaviour, and he definately is a binge drinker.
We only got married 2 and a half months ago. About 2 months before our wedding I confided in his best friend, as the binges were happening quite often. His best friend assured me that it was pre-wedding stress, and that he was sure it would not carry on after we get married. I then left it alone, but was relieved that his best friend knew how I felt about it, so that maybe he would not encourage drinking anymore.
My husband's problem is that once a drop of alcohol touches his mouth, he will not stop drinking until he is left at the bar all alone. When he gets home, he's usually shlurrrrring his schppeech and absolutely wasted. When I get mad at him, he gets very aggressive, not physical, but aggessive to the point that I am scared of him and the way he talks to me and the things he says. And I always end up crying myself to sleep. And then the next day, I'm the one that suffers from sleep deprivation and puffy eyes and the obvious hurt in my heart.
Once, he "fell" and cut his eyelid and was bruised all round his eye. He swears it was a fall, but I don't think he even remembers. There is still a scar on his eyelid today.
A couple weeks ago, he arrived home at 4am, wasted as usual, and with a fat "botox" bottom lip. He admitted that he did not really remember but he's sure it must have been a fall. When he came over to my side of the bed to talk to me and I said "leave me alone, i'm sleeping". His response was "well F$@# Y@% then". The next day when I told him what he said to me, He did not remember and said he was very sorry.
Two weeks later, last Saturday, he went out at 3pm and got home at 1:30am. He walked into our bedroom with an empty bottle of Dom Perignon in one hand and a LIT CIGARETTE in the other! In my room while I am trying to sleep! I kicked him out the room and told him he is disgusting, he got all agressively mad again and I cried myself to sleep again. In the morning IT was feeling sorry for ITSELF as usual and did not want to talk about the problem. When I told him what he walked into the bedroom with, he didn't remember and was greatly sorry for his stupid actions. We were going to meet friends that day, and he said "If you mention anything to anyone, or even mention "drinking" "drunk" or "alcoholic" I will get in the car and leave and you will have to ask someone for a ride home."
On the Monday night, I decided to just do it, talk about his problem and what he plans on doing about it. At first he was like "I don't want to talk about this" and then I said "oh yes, we are talking about this" I said "You have a problem and you need to stop drinking alcohol because you cannot control what alcohol does to you. You allow the alcohol to control you and that is not ok. Don't worry, it's not your fault, it's in the fibre of your being. That's just how you were born and you need to recognise this before it kills you". He got angry and said "Why do you tell people I'm an alcoholic?!" I said "I never told anyone that, because you're not an alcoholic". He said "So then what were you just saying?!" I said "Alcoholics are dependent on alcohol, which means that they cannot function without it and they drink everyday. You are not an alcoholic, but when you do drink, it is a big problem". He said "Well then why is everyone saying that I'm an alcoholic?! Because you told 'Chris' (that time I told his best friend that he has a problem) and now everyone knows 'cause he opened his big mouth and now everyone thinks I'm an alcoholic!!!!" And then he just got very angry and shouting that I decided to leave the room and that was the end of that.
I can't just leave it because it will happen again! I don't know what else to do?! I tried talking to his mother once and she was just as much in denial as he is, I think she was offended that I could even think that anything is wrong with him. And I can't talk to his father 'cause everytime we see him, the two of them just get wasted together (genetic perhaps).
My brother is a recovering alcoholic, I could ask him to talk to him, but then he's just gonna get mad at me again 'cause then I'll be in a "now you told your brother too!" situation and he'll still deny that he has a problem so why should an 'alcoholic' be talking to him if he (believes) he has no problem…
I just don't know what to do anymore… I'm desperate! I even offered to go to AA with him. I even told him that he doesn't have to say anything and that I would say that I am the one with the problem. But then again, why would he go to Alcoholics Anonymous if he is not an alcoholic!
I just don't know what to do anymore… My husband is stuck in DA NILE river, and crocodiles are trying to kill him and there's nothing I can do about it, but watch…
Sorry for the very long story, feels good to get it out. If you read the whole thing, THANK YOU! That's support enough!
Feel bad now, forgot to mention that my husband is the best person in the whole world when he is sober. Everyone loves him. He's polite, kind, loving and just an all-round great guy. And I love him to death, through sickness and health… literally!
That's why I'm hurting so much to see him like that!
Hello Worried. I feel for you. You need immediate help as a couple to get through this.
It seems like your husband does need to stop drinking, but if he's not willing to stop, are you ready to cope with it or are you ready to start another life without him?
Seek help yourself from Al Anon, and perhaps with a counselor. The answers will become cear with time. You are not alone.
Please help. My husband has been a binge drinker for a very long time. I have been with him for 10 years and married 6. The drink has always come first in our relationship. If he ever goes out without me I don't expect him to return until hours and hours later, he too is the last one who will leave the pub. I've tried threatening to leave him, and left to live with my mom he will then come round saying his sorry & I forgive him and he promises it will not ever happen again and he really believes he can control his drink. He locked me out once in the snow and didn't answer the door despite me trying to smash the window he was that drunk when I returned home the following morning the bed sheets were in the wash with sick on them. He has gone to pee on my clothes in the wardrobe before as he thought it was a toilet and I have had texts from friends telling me how drunk he is. When he goes out I've said to him before that I'm scared and he promises even swears on my life that he will not get drunk but he always lets me down. I've filmed him before and he was shocked the next day when I shown it to him. His family mom/day are both alcoholics and he hates it but I', scared he will turn into them. They encourage drinking so really doesn't help when he sees his mom he will be drunk. As above he is lovely apart from this. I am currently pregnant and have been in hospital for 5 days I was so ill I thought I was dying as I have hyperemesis severe sickness – he knows all this and only 4 days after I came out (still really ill) he went to a cricket game was out all day. I texted him (the first text I sent him as I didn't want to bother him) about 3.00 pm and he had been out since 7.30am as I had a letter saying I would need another needle because of my blood type and I texted asking if he would have a blood test he instantly called me shouting "no" down the phone he was horrible and could barely speak. I cried and asked him to sober up. he said he would and that he wasn't drunk and he promised me. He then came home out of his face and because my mom was with me at the time he was saying he wasn't even drunk even thou he could barely stand and speak my mom got angry and said "yes you are out your face" and he just turned saying he's not having it, he said the most hurtful things to me and wanted to finish with me which upset me that much I really thought it would harm the baby as I was hysterical after what I had been through it was like a nightmare, he wanted to drive the car so I snatched them out his hand and he was pushing me out the way. To be pregnant and to go thru so much I couldn't believe it was happening to me. The next day he apologised as usual, said this time is different which I hear all the time and that it won't happen again but how do I believe that when he has let me down so many times. He is now getting nasty when he is drunk and he lies to me all the time. I could carry on forever with the problems that his drinking has caused. He said that he won't drink thru the rest of my pregnancy (6mths) and only a week later he was already asking me when he should go out for a drink but I'm petrified that he will hurt me again and he is using the excuse that he wants to prove to me he can do it. I said what about you saying you won't and he said he will not do it. I begged him to get help, at first he said he would and now he said no way he was not got a problem and he will point blank not see anyone. What do I do please help.
Hi Jemma. I hear that you are scared and heart broken. Your husband needs to be ready and willing to stop drinking FOR LIFE in order to make the changes that he promises. You may want to schedule an intervention with an alcoholic psychologist, and be prepared to leave him in order to take care of yourself and your child. During an intervention, you address the alcoholic behavior and its impact on you, and ask your husband to seek treatment. If he doesn't want to stop drinking and seek alcoholism treatment, you should be ready to move on and take care of yourself. Do you know where to find a psychologist or social worker who can help you during this time? And are there Al-Anon meetings where you are?
He really thinks that because he doesn't drink everyday and only occasionally not even every week, that he hasn't got a problem. But when he does drink he just can't stop he is adamant that he can but I've only been let down on all the times before and I thought our marriage which is great (apart from this) was worth more to him. He just lets me down and I don't want my baby to be let down. His friends are big drinkers too and my husband feels that he has to keep up and that I'm the bad one I understand he must think I'm the alien when his own parents encourage it and they drink everyday and I'm scared he might turn out like that. I know he won't ever stop the drink especially for life I'm scared to ask him to do that because I know what he will choose and I love him so much he is the only boyfriend/husband I have had so it is so hard but then I ask do I want to live with fear of my own husband having a day out with his friends. My mother said to me to just let it be, she said you wouldn't have to worry about him cheating as no one would go near him in that state. I think she is telling me that so I don't get too stressed in this pregnancy and they wouldn't want me to be a single parent. He has never been violet towards me but could this happen? At times I've thought am I possessive not wanting him going out because sometimes people have said "well he don't do it often, he loves you you can see it" Which I believe he does. He said that he couldn't cope with me being ill and he planned all along to get drunk and when I asked him why he told me that he wouldn't he said "I just told you what you wanted to hear" I never thought he was like that. I live near Birmingham (Tamworth). Thank you so much for your reply.
Worried Wife: My brother is an alcoholic who sounds similar to your husband. He's a binge drinker. He and his wife have been married for just over a year. His wife is incredibly tolerant and patient with him and seems like a really nice person. I feel very badly for her, and I'm furious with my brother. I think he's a coward for refusing to get help, and he's treating his wife like dog sh*t. Problem is this is their marriage and I don't feel it's my place to constantly ask her for updates, as if she were my spy. I can't say I'm close to my brother, but I also don't want to see him die because of this (he's already been severely injured as a result of his being drunk). He gets incredibly defensive when the topic comes up – he's berated my mother numerous times just for bringing it up. Worried Wife, my advice is to leave your husband until he at least agrees to get help. "I'm tired of this bullsh*t" is a perfectly acceptable way to feel. Act on it.
Worried Wife: One more thing, you should NOT go to an AA meeting and lie about being an alcoholic. It's not fair to the people there who are honestly seeking help, and you would be putting yourself in a bad position when it comes to your husband.
Right now, your husband is an alcoholic. He isn't receptive to your attempts to help him, so you may want to tell him to call you when he's ready to face his problem. Until then, I think you should leave him, and tell him why you're leaving him. That's my opinion.
Jemma: Spare your child a life with an alcoholic father by leaving your husband. Tell him to call you when he's ready to accept he has a problem. Your husband sounds like a total jerk who treats you like a dog. Until he can muster some respect for you and at least accept his problem, tell him to forget having a relationship with you.
Life is short too to be heartbroken all the time!
My husband is an alcoholic and when he drinks he's abusive and mean,and i still love him,even when he say:He does not love me anylonger but he wants to be my best friend!!!! and i always going to be missed and loved by him.
His libido is over,he isn't potent any longer.
Hello,i'm so confused,he's going mad or i'm going mad?
I want to talk to his mother about it as we are living overseas( his job)and i want to leave ASAP as i can't take anylonger.She should have a share of it,as she was married to an alcoholic husband too(his father),and she's one to blame for his problem as she's being economical mean to him!,She have had broken lotss of promises.
take care
thank you for your time
I cried myself to sleep everynite since he moved to another room.
Hi Mariae, It sounds like you are really stranded and alone in this situation. I'd' suggest that you leave his mother out of it, and seek help for yourself! You need to find the courage to do what is best for you, and that may mean leaving. But, talk with someone (like a counselor or psychologist) and get a plan together. Do you need some help finding someone who can talk to you via the internet?
Yesss pls,ASAP!!,i'm following his foot prints,becoming a hermit and depessed with the situation.
thank you for you time
take care
OK, Mariae. First, if you have health insurance, call to find out about mental health providers the insurance company will cover. Then, look for a therapist in either of these directories.
1. The Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies (ABCT): http://www.abct.org/Members/?m=FindTherapist&fa=FT_Form&nolm=1
2. American Psychological Association: http://locator.apa.org/
Let me know if this is a good start. If you need more information, I'll look into more specific regional or country based counselors for you. Just let me know.
Firstly i think my situation is a little different.
My Husband admits he is an alcoholic, so luckily one step down.
However that since he has admitted it and stopped drinking, i think?
his moods are obviously rather erratic and he gets into bad moods and tries to start arguments, perhaps looking for an excuse to drink? who knows? However he absolutely denies that he is in a mood and tries to pin the argument on me? he has only not been drinking for just over a week and refuses to seek help and admit that his drinking affects his moods whether drunk or not.
Its like a huge elephant in the room and he just wont talk about it. Says he is doing something about it and i am imagining his moods.
I have lived with an addict before and i know the signs, my sister is an alcoholic.
He is an extremely intelligent man and treats me like i am being stupid, i am not stupid, (just by the way)
How do I avoid these constant arguments and stress. Its making me ill and cant be good for my child either.
A little background:
We got married a year ago, I lived in South Africa and moved to the UK with my Child to live with him 6 months ago. It has been a very stressful move away from my friends and family.
I am all alone in a foreign country with a Husband who is an alcoholic.
Hello worried. You are not alone. I suggest that you read and contact some of the resources outlined in this NHS document about caring for an alcoholic.
And post back here any time you like with questions or just with more worries. You are not alone!
great blog! this was a really great blog to read! 🙂
My boyfriend is an alcoholic. There has been a break through.
This may seem harsh, but I've cut an alcoholic in denial out of my life.
I've seen him once in 10 years, but he has frequently called me.
I've offered plenty of advice on how he could get jobs and repair the havoc his alcoholism has created over the years, and watched him really slide in the last 10 years.
His calls had become longer and longer, and less and less sensible.
Then one evening, he exploded at me because I told him that I didn't want him to find me a girlfriend (I'm going through a tough divorce, and really don't want one, something I had told him a number of times before). He was offensive.
Three days later he left a message that was critical of a woman who works for me, within earshot of her (fortunately, I erased it before she heard it). He sounded drunk in the message.
I had to warn her not to talk about herself, work or me to him, because it would get back to me, and that I would also do the same.
He kept calling, and after a few weeks, I took his call. I told him that I was really upset by what he had said the last time we spoke. He said that he didn't know what he said – he had no memory of it, because he had been drinking for pain management purposes (just like the doctor ordered). I told him he was blackout drunk, and implied that he had to stop drinking. He didn't get the message.
I also told him that the message he left about my employee could have caused a problem, but I had been able to prevent that, fortunately. He continued to call to see how she was doing (he knows her) until I told him not to ask about her again.
He stopped calling for 8 months, but then kept calling the employee, who was also avoiding her, and then he started calling me again, leaving long-winded messages
Finally, today, because my employee said that he would keep asking her what was going on, I wrote him a letter telling him how I could no longer talk to him any more until he stopped drinking, because not only was he offensive, he was also getting in my way of my making a living.
I doubt that he'll get treatment, and he'll probably simply be furious. I had thought about calling him to tell him this, but figured that my message would be met with denial and anger, and didn't want to get into an argument over this.
He has a wife who is sharp and carrying the family financially, and I figure that she should be the one to address this with him, rather than me. I have numerous other problems, and can't fix someone who has already been told that his drinking has caused a problem, and won't quit (I've heard enough to know that he is still drinking).;
But now I'll be the bad guy. Unfortunately, sometimes you have to move on from destructive people who are in denial.