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Discussion > Brexit ..Bubbleworlds and Climate psychology
The interesting thing is that Brexiters knew well about the large contingent of Remainers
..but come Friday...... the Remainers were stunned to find there were masses of Brexiters
On Friday's radio all Remainers were angry , whilst Brexiteers seemed calm and rational .
Not all Remainers were like that, nor are all Climate skeptics non-lefties
But There are interesting psychology parallels between typical Global Warming True Beleivers and typical Remainers.
a similar level of anger, certainty beyond evidence , and DENIAL.
The good video on Guido about Social Media Bubbleworlds
Also a good article in the Telegraph This was the day the British people defied their jailers by TIM STANLEY
..It was a Major Triumph for Farage, UKIP and Brexiteers yet they largely resisted ringing the ChurchBells and almost zero celebration has been shown on the BBC ..as if Brexiteers know not to crow over the Remainers.
MY question to people is : Think back to Thursday morning ..what were your predictions for the vote percentages ?
Were you like the Remainers I just heard on the radio who said that they always expected to win, with one woman's guess for it to be 70% for Remain ?
It has been claimed ( and Jonathan Haidt's 'The Righteous Mind is my most coherent source) that people on the Left just can't see what those on the conservative side are talking about. Just cannot understand what we are concerned about or interpret our views as anything other than wrong/evil. Those on the right can see what the other lot are concerned with but have other considerations which weigh with us whereas the Left give undue priority to Caring and Fairness.
In the recent unpleasantness it is clear both sides were talking past each other, but this time I was completely unable to see what the other side was on about. All Project Fear and no positive reason to stay at all, caring and fairness or not.
Oh, and I always thought that there were shy leavers uncounted by the polls and that the polls themselves were searchnig for algorithms to get a convenient result. They have been wrong so often recently one wonders if they are straight.
I should put a link to the Guido article about Social Media Bubble worlds
..note it adds "Guido noticed that during the 2008 Ken v Boris campaign private car owners didn't know anyone who was going to vote for Ken and those who solely relied on public transport were almost the reverse, they didn't know anyone who was going to vote for Boris."
I wasn't too surprised by the result, given the recent surprise of the general election result after a referendum had been promised by Cameron. That is probably the price he paid for spiking UKIP's guns at the election when the alternative might have been another coalition.
Pollsters and genuinely-journalistic media probably should ask themselves some searching questions about how they choose to report much politics. Perhaps it is because they are just unwittingly acting to make certain topics off-limits for consideration in the public sphere, or at least introduce bias. Of course the politicians and their political friends in the media often have this as their primary intention, so they have the least excuse for being surprised.
The most honest admission for not predicting the result came from Labrokes. I think they were quoted as saying "We give odds to make a profit from bettors, not to make accurate predictions. It has been a good result for us."
MY question to people is : Think back to Thursday morning ..what were your predictions for the vote percentages ?
Were you like the Remainers I just heard on the radio who said that they always expected to win, with one woman's guess for it to be 70% for Remain ?
Jun 26, 2016 at 10:32 PM | Registered Commenterstewgreen
Oh, and I always thought that there were shy leavers uncounted by the polls and that the polls themselves were searchnig for algorithms to get a convenient result. They have been wrong so often recently one wonders if they are straight.
Jun 26, 2016 at 10:44 PM | Unregistered Commenterrhoda
I did not follow things at all until the last moment. Until then, I assumed it would be ~70% remain.
But when I heard, a couple of days before that it would be around 52:48 "remain" I guessed that it would actually turn out to be about 52:48 "brexit".
On the basis that the polls have always shown a bias towards predicting left-leaning results - at least since the defeat of Harold Wilson by Edward Heath - 1979(?).
1970, I meant. I think.
I honestly expected a 5% swing to Remain, but was worried it might be higher. My most optimistic view was that the Leave side might garner enough votes to convince the government to start taking their concerns seriously. I feared that people, especially the elderly, would be frightened away from Leaving. The outcome was better than I could have dreamt of. There's a good article in The Times today by Libby Purvis although I don't agree with her overall view she captures the adolescent wailing very well. Depressing to see the determined predictions of disaster from the losing side (including the BBC, of course). We need confidence and the go ahead spirit.
Operation Emotional Blackmail is the new phase the PR machine has moved onto.
"Think of the Children !" Radio 5 Live has repeatedly played the clip of the old woman who after talking to her son has suddenly changed her mind about Brexit and has signed the fake petition.
Wow @MartinA
"I did not follow things at all until the last moment. Until then, I assumed it would be ~70% remain."
..that sounds like the bubbleworld effect.
My pre-referendum thinking was basically REMAIN would rig it using propaganda tricks and just win
Detail : I certainly didn't go for a number. : Predicting stuff is a mugs game, all you can do is consider future scenarios' But I was picking up a few things from the background.
- Most voices I could hear on the BBC and Lefty forums were blind faith for remain, yet on other forums like Biased-BBC.org there was vast support ... Then I could see that Remain was moving into DESPERATION moves culminating in the cynical use of Jo Coxes death to smear Brexiteers as violent rightwingers.... And I thought wow not only is Brexit support vast, it is probably the majority.. So on the election night I was prepared for either scenarios
...But then I was taken in by BBC spin 'Looks like Remain are set for a close win, according to market experts and Farage has conceded.' And thought well the Remain dirty PR tricks have worked.
..So It was a surprise on Friday morning to find Brexit had won...
..Wow the little man/woman has stood up to the bullies and politics has moved forward with the first step towards reform...Like 'truth will out ' and the same reform will happen with green energy policies etc.
Oh an on Operation Emotional Blackmail and this petition plea for 2nd referendum
Can you imagine if the 2014 Scottish referendum had had similar percentages in favour of Independence, that King Salmond and Princess Sturgeon would be giving in ?
No way they'd be sticking there foot down and saying 'the rules are the rules'
I thought Leave had to have a significant majority on Remain to have a chance of winning. I thought the undecided would automatically vote to Remain or not bother. Sure Leave had lost I went to bed at 10.
I think there are people who regret voting Leave and others who didn't vote because they they thought Leave didn't stand a chance. I think there were very few who voted for the EU itself, I think they voted for no disruption. Not a ringing endorsement.
Ultimately I thought it was going to be about 55:45 for Remain. So did 97% of people.
Trusting opinion polls is dangerous for politicians, and the public, especially when the politicians endorse 97% of them.
I think there are people who regret voting Leave…So why on Earth did they vote that way? What sort of logic courses through a mind that thinks, "Well, I don't really want to leave, but I will vote to Leave, as I don't think Leave will win…"? (There again, there is the assumption that such a mind actually thinks; perhaps they just did what they were told to do.)
I ignored the rhetoric and posed myself one, simple question: do I want this country to be ruled by an elected government that can be ousted, or do I want it to be ruled by the unelected elite of a foreign-based power, many of whom are hostile towards us, and who we will never be able to hold accountable or to kick out?
While there was a lot of what I'd call advertising about the EU there was nowhere near enough time for genuine planning. There wasn't a fixed voice for Leave for a start and Labour had a leader in Remain who acted like he'd been blackmailed to perform and an electorate who thought very differently from its London centric MPs. Cameron put people in the position of jumping one way or the other. Had there been a proper consultation about leaving the EU, the reasons for and against would have come out. If, and it's a very big if, the politicians had properly listened they might have been able to rectify a lot of the problems people have with our current situation. Even the problem of creeping federalisation might have been solved.
Cameron went to the EU sure that he and his public would vote to remain, no matter what rubbish he brought back. The EU believed him. He hadn't a clue how much immigration with the knock on effects of poor services and federalisation affected the public. He didn't realise what effect of 40 odd years of losing ground to the EU has had. Apart from a few skanky politicians and greedy bankers, nobody really likes the EU and everyone else has slagged the EU off or blamed it on a regular basis. The EU mind, not the Europeans.
If the question had been do you want to be part of an EU super state the answer would be a resounding 'no'. We would then have had to work out where the boundaries lay. The problem with the 'ever closer union' veto is that it didn't address how the EU tightens its grip, one little change at a time. It has made bigger lurches but didn't need to and counted on pro EU leaders pushing them through. So we'd have been drawn further and further in with no opportunity to stop it. The veto would just never be used.
But none of that happened so a lot of people voted to leave without really knowing what it would look like and a lot of people voted to remain without asking themselves where they'd want their government and civil servants to draw the line or if it would be possible. Pulling away from a black hole would use a lot of energy but it doesn't mean you should give into the pull.
Leaving the EU will be worse than Global Warming Alarmists thought possible.
Everybody else will appreciate the extra money.
The thinking and arguments of the Remainers seems to be well summed up by Pink Floyd's verse, "I have become comfortably numb."
I kept thinking of the rabbit burrow being fed by the farmer in Watership Down.
Having talked to my children who all live in the East Midlands feared, for purely personal reasons*, an exit vote from England, I expected a Remain vote from Wales on nothing more than the money and support the EU gives (redistributes UK money) to Wales. After talking to my brother I expect a remain vote from Scotland possibly with a lower turnout than the rest of the UK. I expected Northern Ireland to vote remain but not split quite the way it was, probably naively having met extreme Unionism in the past.
+As an expat any changes with reciprocal agreements have an instant effect.
As opposed to A Song of Patriotic Prejudice
The English, the English, the English are best,
I wouldn't give tuppence for all of the rest
Flanders and Swann
Here's an interesting possibility.
Gibralter, Scotland and Northern Ireland join forces and remain. England and Wales leave.
There is precedent. Greenland left while Denmark remained
I was talking to my brother in Scotland last night, he suggested the Englamd should cede from the UK and leave the EU, that would be closer to the Greenland model.
England leaves and the rest remain?That would be the outcome which best fits the vote.
yes, England leaves makes sense.


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Oak Creek Police Lieutenant Brian Murphy was shot nine times at close range by neo-Nazi Wade Michael Page at the Wisconsin Sikh temple massacre on Sunday. Despite being gravely injured Murphy waved on officers coming to his aid, motioning for them to help the wounded inside.
Murphy, from New York, was among those shot , as Page opened fire. Twelve people in all were killed and Murphy and his colleague, Sam Lenda, were among those wounded.
Although he is in critical condition at the Froedtert Hospital, in Wauwatosa, he is expected to survive.
Oak Creek Police Chief John Edwards said the Associated Press that as his fellow officers arrived on the scene Murphy waved them on.
He said "As they approached him, he waved them off. He had been shot nine times, one of them very serious in the neck area, and he waved them off and told them to go into the temple and assist those in there."
Despite his pleas officers dragged him to a squad car before continuing into the temple.
Speaking to the New York Daily News newspaper his father James Murphy (78) spoke about his son Brian and Terry, who just retired from the NYPD Intelligence Division.
The proud father, a retired city sanitation worker, said "I raised two brave guys."
The wounded officer's colleagues in Wisconsin say that Murphy still have that New York chutzpah and accent despite being on the ground in Milwaukee for over two decades.
Thomas Bauer, the town's former police chief, told The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel "He's a highly distinguished police officer, highly decorated."
Murphy (51) is expected to survive his injuries but it is expected that the bullet lodged in his neck may have caused some permanent damage.
Dr Gary Seabrook, the director of surgical services at Froedtert Hospital. He said "He clearly was in a blaze of gunfire."
His father said "Brian can't talk because that bullet is in a sensitive spot…He's not out of the woods yet."
However his father is confident his son will make it through. He said "He could walk through walls, that guy…It's terrible he had to take all those bullets, but he was helping people who were in real trouble."
The FBI have identified the lone shooter as 40-year-old Wade Michael Page. He is being described as a frustrated white supremacist who sometimes went by the name "Jack Boot" and has been playing guitar in racist rock bands since serving in the military in the 1990s.
His reasons for targeting this Sikh congregation remain unclear.
On Monday ABC News reported that Page was associated with the white-supremacist group Volksfront. However this group has since denied this condemning his actions and his "demented criminal cowardice".
Here's the CNN report on Wade Michael Page:

subset: commoncrawl


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Degree Options
Degree Options
Students must complete a minimum of 30 credits for the thesis option or 34 credits for the non-thesis option. This includes four core courses in biological, chemical, geological, and physical oceanography, as well as seminar and proposal development. Students in the thesis option will complete a thesis of 6 credits (in addition to the course credits) that is acceptable to the thesis-examining committee, and must pass an oral thesis defense presented to the public. Students in the non-thesis option will also complete a Directed Research project.
Students plan a program of study in conjunction with a faculty guidance committee (FGC). Students entering the program without a master's degree are expected to complete a minimum of 36 credit hours. Students with an M.S. degree in oceanography or related field in physical science from UNH or another university should first demonstrate (through accredited transcript or the qualifying examination) acceptable mastery in the basic core areas. All students must complete at least one course from each of the following categories: Natural Sciences, Methods, Ethics/Policy/Law, and Seminar. Additional credit hours (typically 15) and the foreign language requirement are determined by the FGC. Students present an original research proposal and undergo a qualifying examination to advance to candidacy.
Program Information
Thomas Lippmann
- Associate Professor of Oceanography
- Director, Oceanography Graduate Program
- Ocean Engineering Graduate Program
University of New Hampshire
Center for Coastal & Ocean Mapping
165 Chase Ocean Engineering Lab.
24 Colovos Road
Durham, NH 03824


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7 Mistakes Brides Make When Choosing Their Wedding Flower Colors
The flowers on your wedding day help to show off the event's overall theme and style. That's why it's important to avoid these 7 mistakes many brides make when choosing the blooms for their big day.
Choosing clashing color combos.
"Purple and orange was a trend a few years back and I am so happy it is gone!" says Anastasia Stevenson, "The DIY Wedding Planner". "Bright and bold, clashing colors take the focus away from the bride and other decor in the pictures and isn't a great look overall."
Choosing unnatural colors.
This is a common error with beach weddings, says Stevenson. "There are no turquoise or aqua flowers in nature. I strongly warn brides not to use dyed flowers, which can run and ruin your dress, stain your hands and everything else they drip on. Brides should be loose and flexible with their floral choices, and then they can find the most beautiful blooms available for them."
Going crazy with color.
Sometimes, though, brides can go overboard in their floral color choices, says Julie Gladstone of Bride & Groom. "Stick to a central color scheme and throw in a few accents if they make sense."
Ignoring the venue colors.
Take pictures of your venue and then imagine if your bright pink and orange flower choices will clash with their purple walls, suggests Stevenson. "If you are set on the wedding palette, then choose a venue with neutral walls and floors. Think of the whole design and plan accordingly."
Being too strict.
Flowers are grown, not manufactured, reminds Chandin Geihsler of Studio 3 Floral Design. "Flowers may have yellow centers and tinges of blush on the petals. Obsessing about the right shade of pink may and not working with what nature offers can be stressful and create arrangements that look forced or fake. Your colors may be coral and navy, but mixing in touches of peach, hints of blush and a healthy amount of green creates a natural elegance that a strict color palette just can't accomplish."


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Tampa, FL (PRWEB) September 22, 2016
ClassAction.com attorneys have filed a lawsuit alleging that fertilizer corporation Mosaic may have exposed the millions of Floridians that rely on the Floridan Aquifer to environmental, financial and health risks.
According to the lawsuit, on August 27th, 2016, Mosaic reported a sinkhole found at the company's New Wales fertilizer plant in Mulberry, Florida. Mosaic notified the United States Environmental Protection Agency (USEPA) and Florida Department of Environmental Protection (FDEP) of the issue as required by state and federal regulations, but allegedly did not inform nearby residents and potentially affected populations for over three weeks.
Court documents suggest that the sinkhole--which is approximately 45 feet in diameter--allegedly caused an estimated 215 million gallons of radioactive waste to escape the New Wales facility and contaminate the Floridan Aquifer. The Floridan Aquifer system supplies drinking water to millions of residents throughout the state.
It is as yet unclear to what extent these alleged wastes have travelled through the Aquifer, but water tests noted in court documents indicate that the wastes contain extremely toxic and radioactive contaminants such as radium, radon, uranium, thorium, and lead, as well as other non-radioactive toxins.
According to court documents, the sinkhole was allegedly reported after water levels dropped in a phosphogypsum stack retention pond. Phosphogypsum is a radioactive waste product generated during the processing of phosphate ores. During that process, phosphate is separated from the ore, and used to make fertilizers.
Court documents explain that the byproducts of this process, phosphogypsum and phosphoric acid, are both extremely toxic, radioactive, and harmful to human health. Because of this, the lawsuit explains, there are extremely few secondary uses for phosphogypsum, and the material is stored long-term in mountainous piles known as stacks, which can reach a height of several hundred feet.
According to the lawsuit, the EPA banned most uses of phosphogypsum in 1989, which prompted the stacking of this waste product. Today, court documents note, there are approximately 1 billion tons of phosphogypsum contained in 24 stacks throughout Florida, and 30 million new tons are generated each year.
The class representatives noted in the complaint are Nicholas Bohn, Natasha McCormick and Eric Weckman, all of whom rely on private wells for drinking water.
According to court documents, the lawsuit alleges that the potential contaminants could compromise the safety of drinking water, particularly for residents located near the sinkhole.
ClassAction.com attorneys encourage any other residents potentially impacted by the sinkhole to call 888 987 1307.
Media inquiries can be directed to:
Karine Lim/Erika Nedwell
212 768 6265
Case 8:16-cv-02724-JDW-JSS - Bohn et al v. The Mosaic Company et al


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Today, I had a real good peek into Malaysia's undergound art movement…. That's www.galleriiizu.com – 2 'L's 3 'I's….
Please read this whole post so you know why I'm begging all of you to come next Sunday!
I spent 4 hours there. Can you imagine? It helped that they offered free refreshments, great music in the background, aired short films, had an art auction, and I got to meet so many lively people! Including the founders Izu and Suzanne… so friendly and REAL about what they do… Also…
Rena had her work exhibited – really cool stuff! See more of her work here.
And, I found a use for my hard earned salary… ended up spending RM163... on what?
RM88 – They were auctioning artwork… I won 2 prints of artwork… One huge one from The UseAgain Exhibition, which is a super interesting project – where artists put together artwork from a miscellany of other artwork previously rejected by clients in advertising… and another print by a local artist, Mohd Noor (click here to see it!)
RM20 – A shirt from YuanGarden. Visit their site – admirable – 5 guys building silk screens and selling shirts wherever they can. I will be meeting up to yamcha with them soon.
RM27 – Another shirt from EightyFourCube.
RM28 – A Territory art book thingy featuring more UseAgain Exhibition stuff.
All this really inspires me to make MindValley's new office into something orgasmic.
You can buy goodies that will make your friends will ask "Where did you get that from???" in protruding-vein-envy.
A major art auction at 2p.m – selling prints to fine arts to photographs… at bargain prices! And auctions are so much fun.
A party to celebrate a great 3 weeks of Art Lelong… Party begins at 6p.m where everyone will be bringing their friend's friend's friend.
Very good vibes going all around – I guarantee you will be invigorated to be extra productive in the week to come.
You can expect to be surprised – Especially if you think Malaysia has no youth-culture/ artistic talent…
If you're not convinced, check out what the event is really all about, their website, and the photos I took! Yes, click here to see some quirky photos.


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It Is Again Time for Monarchs
by Ro Wauer
The fall monarch migration through our part of Texas is due any day now. The major portion of the southbound monarchs that pass through our area can be expected by mid- to late September and to continue through most of October. The majority of the migrants will move out of our region into Mexico by the end of October. And this year should be another big year, in spite of previous concerns about impacts to their wintering grounds in Mexico.
Good news about monarchs comes from an article by Mike Quinn, TPWD Invertebrate Biologist, in "The Texas Nature Tracker," a TPWD newsletter. Mike wrote that surveys of wintering monarch colonies by Mexican biologists in the Monarch Butterfly Biosphere Preserve in Michoacan in 2005 revealed numbers "nearly tripled in size, from a record low of 2.19 hectares the previous winter to 5.92 hectares of occupied forest habitat last winter!" He added that "The annual benchmark is represented by the size of the forest area occupied rather than the actual number of insects due to the widely disparate estimates of between 10 and 50 million monarchs per hectare."
The monarch preserve lies at about 10,000 feet elevation, where periodic freezes occur. Last winter was relatively mild and the wintering monarchs were not subject to deadly freezes as they had during the previous winter. That combined with loss of habitat had resulted in some serious declines in the number of over wintering monarchs.
But by mid-March 2006, Texans were seeing above average numbers of northbound migrants, including groups, rather than single monarchs. These spring migrants were "on the final leg of a sojourn" that had "begun half a continent and over a half year ago." Mike pointed out that these migrants, "composed of worn individuals approaching the eighth month of their adult life, and coincides with the insect's lowest annual population level." The spring migrating females that found milkweeds (larval foodplants) layed eggs and continued northward, although the majority of these old-timers soon perished. It was their offspring and their offspring that continued northward into the Great Plains, the Midwest, and further north into Canada.
Mike reported that "by the end of June 2006, the monarchs were still expanding to new locations in Canada with many observers reporting above average numbers of all stages of monarchs!!! All individuals in terms of monarch observations and current weather conditions in the upper Midwest suggest that this might be a banner year for the mighty monarch butterfly!"
Observers interesting in sending their monarch observations can do so either to Texas Monarch Watch, 3000 S. IH-35, Ste. 100, Austin, TX 78704, or directly to Mike Quinn at firstname.lastname@example.com.


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Public Interest, Political Philosophy and the Study of Public Administration
Public interest is a term with a long history in traditional political philosophy. The idea of transforming the interests of many people into some notion of a common good is of course for many people the central task of the whole political process. Thomas Aquinas maintained the "common good" (bonum commune) to be the end of government and law, while Aristotle took the idea of the "common interest" (to koinei sympheron) as the foundation for his distinction between "right" constitutions, in the common interest, and "wrong" constitutions that were merely in the interests of the rulers. The purpose of government is therefore, within many traditional accounts, to give expression to the public interest. As John Locke puts it, "the peace, safety, and the public good of the people" are the ends of political society, and "the well being of the people shall be the supreme law". Jean-Jacques Rousseau took the idea of the "common good" (le bien commun) to be the object of the general will and purpose of government.
However, this begs the question of how one determines what is in the public interest and what is merely, in James Madison's words the will of "interested factions". This is potentially dangerous territory. Eamon De Valera, the founder of the Irish state, famously is said to have stated that he only had to look into his own heart to know what the Irish people were thinking. It is not difficult to conjure up a whole series of more sinister figures from history who similarly may have claimed to be the font and origin of what the people want. However, the fundamental task of a political process (at least in anything approaching a democratic condition) is to find a way of translating all the individual interests in society into some common, public or general good that both encapsulates and transcends each individual expression of interest. Within some versions of democracy public interest is simply the result of the clash of all private interests. It may be enough here to simply count the preferences of people expressed in a fair election and take the majority position (hedged around by various protections for the minority) as establishing the public interest. Other "thicker" forms of democracy require more by way of resolving, measuring and building preferences within process of deliberation and debate.
The fact remains however that no political system can generate a comprehensive series of answers as to what is within the public interest in all the issues that face government. It will remain up to officials – as well as lawyers and judges – to make decisions about where the public interest lies in any matter. The classic British Civil Service, within the Northcote-Trevelyan tradition, would see itself as operating within the political framework of government in pursuit of the public interest.
Certainly the idea of public interest is a central concept throughout the Seven Principles of Public Life, produced by Lord Nolan as guidance for all those involved in public service and it remains a key element for the everyday working of Government for example in the Code of Conduct for Board Members of Public Bodies. The concept of public interest remains central in other areas of civil service business too, most obviously in relation to disclosing information. In addition to important matters such as whistle-blowing, it can been seen too in relation to more mundane information matters such as, for example, what information may be disclosed relating to the appointments process or whether Government funded research may be published more widely. Public interest is also used a working concept to judge whether or not any new policy innovation under the so-called Green Book procedure for evaluating and appraising whether any new policy innovation should be developed.
This sort of reality of government practice has provided a starting point for many accounts of public interest within a framework of the study of Public Administration. The way in which the term is used and the value attached to it have been the subject of many trends and fashions within this academic discipline in the UK and USA. Questions have been asked about what is the proper boundary for describing the "public" in this context. Should it be the community, region, or nation, or is there a plausible idea of a European or even Global public whose interest can be divined? [see EU law; the ECHR] Even within a viewpoint circumscribed by some vague notion of "society" – however that it is defined -, public interest has been seen variously as the commonly held values of society, society's "best interests",, a moral standard for public action, a simple balance of interests, an illusory idea, and other things besides. This leads on to debate about whether and how any version of public interest can be calculated and how it might be advanced through government policy. As the study of Public Administration blends into Political Philosophy there are arguments that an interest must be seen as "justified claim" rather than simply a want or desire, and that the "public" as it is constituted for these purposes must satisfy certain democratic criteria. This leads on to wider questions about the nature and possibilities of political action in a common interest and the moral, ethical and normative nature of such action.
It is at this point, and because of the difficulties in ever coming up with any agreed, usable conception that some public administration scholars have recently turned to law (and to the Constitution in the US context) in order to gain some purchase on this concept. Within (particularly North American) approaches to the discipline of Public Administration there can be seen a recent trend towards an approach that systematically studies public administration by looking at court interpretations, as well as statutes, international treaties and significant constitutional actors. Within this approach combining understandings of public interest with constitutional law, and wider ethical considerations as viewed through contemporary economic and legal analyses, is thought to reinvigorate the discipline and revive the viability of studying the rather troubled idea of public interest.


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At Youth Guidance, we believe that no matter what challenges a young person faces, they are more likely to succeed when they have caring adults in their lives. Our highly-trained staff guides kids to overcome the life and academic challenges facing Chicago's youth. We meet kids where they are — physically and emotionally — to help them focus on their education, make positive choices, and remain on the right path toward life success.
Founded in 1924 today Youth Guidance is a leading provider of outcomes-driven programs serving more than 8,500 youth while touching the lives of more than 14,000 youth, parents, teachers, and community members.
Position Summary
The Assistant Resource Coordinator at Ravenswood Elementary School is a part-time position responsible for assisting the Resource Coordinator with developing school-based programming, events and activities. Lead programming based on parent and student interests/needs, strengthening student social and emotional skills, academic enrichment, community service, leadership, fine and performing arts, and health & wellness.
Essential Duties/Responsibilities
- Serve as team lead/YG point of contact when Resource Coordinator is out of the office
- Make executive decisions to manage the program, deal with schedule changes, handle emergencies, etc. with the best interests of all stakeholders in mind
- Maintain complete record of attendance and services
- Manage billing roster and assist with invoicing process
- Provide administrative and program support for School Programs
- Supervise and support students and staff where directed
- Aid in staff development, including organizing and hosting trainings
- Maintain behavioral expectations for students in keeping with established methods and procedures; mastery of school-based behavior management plan
- Maintain positive and mutually informative relationship with school administration, teachers, staff, parents, students and community stakeholders
- Develop and maintain tools for communicating with grant providers, school, parents, students, community members, and other stakeholders as necessary
- Cultivate community partnerships with individuals and organizations that can provide resources and/or support for programs and initiatives, including volunteers, donations, youth opportunities, grants, etc
- Perform other duties as assigned


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After struggling with warping on larger prints, I decided to try adding a heated bed to my Simple. I am delighted with the results. It has completely eliminated the warping problem and allows me to print at full speed.
Here's what I used. As usual, you use information from the internet at your own risk, and if you are not comfortable with things like voltage and current ratings, get help from someone who is. Electricity at the current levels involved here are a modest fire hazard if adequate safeguards are not in place.
1) MakerFarm 4.5x6" Heated Bed with Prewired Thermistor
I could have individually bought the high temp wire and sleeving and assembled it, but the price difference was very small.
2) 3/16"x 4 x 5 Borosilicate Glass from McMaster Carr
Borosilicate glass is less likely to break when warmed and cooled. I figured the thicker stuff would be less likely to break when I pried things off the bed.
3) A solid state relay to control the bed. The Printrboard has an output that can directly drive a heated bed this size, but there are reports that the Molex connector isn't up to the task and can overheat. Additionally, a short on the bed could damage the Printrboard. The Printrboard is an expensive piece of hardware, so I chose to isolate it from the bed.
Update: I added a heat sink to the SSR. It got fairly hot during long prints, even running at 50% of it's rated current capacity. The heat sink helped a great deal.
In this configuration, the relay is the only load driven by the PrintrBoard's heat bed output. The relay has to be driven by the 12V output, and be able to switch enough DC current and voltage to run the bed with a margin of safety. Also be aware that the control outputs on the solid state relay have a polarity that must be observed. There is good information on wiring up the SSR here. Be aware that unlike typical magnetic relays, SSRs have a polarity on both the driven side and the load side.
4) A large 12V power supply I already own. The power supply that comes with the Simple is not sized to run a heated bed. Since I was using a relay it was easy to power the bed from another supply. Some people are using a modified ATX computer supply, or 12V supplies are available in a variety of capacities. MakerFarm says the bed alone can draw up to 8 amps.
5) 4 medium sized binder paper clips to hold the heated bed and glass to the plywood bed.
6) Permatex Ultra Copper high temperature silicone sealant to secure the thermistor to the heat bed.
An interesting note on the relay: I first chose a mechanical relay. It turns out that the Printrboard's firmware is set up to run a fast PID loop which is well suited to run semiconductors. It causes a mechanical relay to chatter several times per second. Changing it to a mode more suitable for a mechanical relay requires recompiling and flashing the Printrboard firmware. That's a lot of work, and carries a bit of risk, so I chose to buy the solid state relay.
The first part of the process was to secure the thermistor to the underside of the heated bed. I placed the thermistor where I wanted it, taped the wires to hold it in place, and then put a blob of Permatex Ultra Copper over it to hold it down. I was careful not to put any Permatex between the thermistor and bed.
Next, I marked the plywood bed of my printer for cutouts so that the heated bed would fit flush on it. That required cutouts for the bed wires and the thermistor. The circular cutout for the thermistor was done with a Forstner bit. The small cutouts for the wires was done with a hobby knife.
I then found that the full width clips limited my print area a bit - the head would smack one when it went home. I used a bench grinder to cut them in half.
I got good results heating the bed to 55C, with blue tape on the glass. Prints come out perfectly flat and are hard to get off the bed. A friend tells me hairspray works well on the heated glass on his Rostock Max and the parts come off the bed more easily, so I intend to try that soon.
I have been extremely pleased with this so far - it resolved my warping issue entirely, allows me to print at normal speeds, and in theory, I should be able to print ABS now. Total cost was around $65, since I had the power supply already.
Update: Prints ABS great at 90-95C. I have switched to ABS pretty much exclusively now.


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Monday, April 10, 2017
Concert Review: Lawrence Brownlee and Eric Owens at the Folly Theater
Lawrence Brownlee's powerful singing and enthralling emoting impressed me as I sat in the rear balcony of Carnegie Hall two years ago. When I discovered that I could secure front row seats for my cousin's April 6 show at the Folly Theater at an 80% discount, I jumped at the deal offered by the Harriman-Jewell series. I was rewarded for my nominal investment with my favorite show of 2017 to date. Yet it was Brownlee's fellow opera star Eric Owens who I most appreciated during the program of arias, Great American Songbook tunes and gospel selections. Less flashy but more stirring than Brownlee, Owens reduced me to tears as he delivered "Give Me Jesus." Jovial duets on uptempo selections like the ridiculous "Dolores" caused my face to ache from smiling so strenuously. Libby Hanssen reviewed the concert for The Kansas City Star.
I reviewed Kris Kristofferson's return to the Uptown Theater for The Kansas City Star.
I reviewed Judah & the Lion's concert at the Uptown Theater for The Kansas City Star.
I wrote extended concert previews about Radiohead and Chris Brown for The Kansas City Star and Ink magazine.
My latest rounds of weekly music previews for The Kansas City Star and Ink magazine are here and here.
I recently designated Second Hand King and Katy Guillen & the Girls KCUR's Band of the Week.
Donny McCaslin floored me at the Folly Theater on Friday. My notes are at Plastic Sax.
I did some work with Lonnie Brooks in the 1990s. The Chicago blues artist was a warm, generous man. Brooks died last week.
Until I read his obituaries, I didn't know that Arthur Blythe was married to the one-time Kansas City based vocalist and actress Queen Bey.
"I took my roof off at the red light!" I'm not too proud to admit that I can't get enough of Rick Ross' noxious Rather You Than Me. Here's "Trap Trap Trap".
I ordinarily don't have much patience for newly recorded mainstream jazz albums. Heads of State's All in One is an exception. The septuagenarian saxophonist Gary Bartz is in top form.
Raekwon's The Wild may be the strongest album by a Wu-Tang Clan member other than Ghostface of the last five years. Here's "This Is What It Comes To".
F*cked Up's "Year of the Snake" has restored my faith in 23-minute songs. RIYL: MC5, kicking out the jams, Dwarves.
(Original image by There Stands the Glass.)
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It turns out it wasn't as hard as I anticipated to start getting useful information extracted from my born-digital-for-printing-on-dead-trees dissertation. Here's a not-yet-perfect xml serialization (borrowing tags from the TEI) of "instance" information found in the diss narrative:
Each instance is a historical event (or in some cases event series) relating to boundary demarcation or dispute within the empire. Here's a comparison between the original formatting for paper and the xml.
For paper:
<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?>

<idno type="original">INST9</idno>
A Negotiated Boundary between the <placeName
type="ancient">Zamucci</placeName> and the <placeName

Burton 2000, no. 78

Date(s): <date>AD 86</date>

This boundary marker was placed in
accordance with the agreement of both parties (<foreign xml:lang="la">ex
conven/tione utrarumque nationum</foreign>), and therefore may be taken as
evidence of a <hi rend="bold">boundary dispute</hi>.

This single boundary marker from coastal <placeName
type="modern">Libya</placeName> provides the only evidence for the resolution
of a boundary dispute between these two indigenous peoples. The date of the
demarcation, as calculated from the imperial titulature, places the event in
the same year as the reported 'destruction' of the <placeName
type="ancient">Nasamones</placeName> by <placeName type="ancient">Legio III
Augusta</placeName> as a consequence of a tax revolt in which tax collectors
were killed.<note n="286"> Zonaras 11.19. </note> It is not clear whether
the boundary action was related to the conflict, or merely took advantage of
the temporary presence of the legionary legate in what ought to have been
part of the proconsular province. Surviving documentation for proconsuls
during the 80s AD is incomplete, and therefore we cannot say who was
governing <placeName type="ancient">Africa Proconsularis </placeName>at the
time of this demarcation.<note n="287"> Thomasson 1996, 45-48. </note>
Neither party seems to have been related to the <placeName
type="ancient">Nasamones</placeName>; rather, they are thought to be sub-
tribes of the <placeName type="ancient">Macae.</placeName><note
n="288">Mattingly 1994, 27-28, 32, 74, 76.. </note>

One thing that made this a lot easier than it might of been was the way I used styles in Microsoft Word back when I created the original version of the document. Rather than just painting formatting onto my text for headings, paragraphs, strings of characters, and so forth, I created a custom "style" for each type of thing I wanted to paint (e.g., an "instance heading" or a "personal name"). I associated the desired visual formatting with each of these, but the names themselves (since the captured semantic distinctions that I was interested in) provided hooks today for writing this stuff out as sort-of TEI XML.
There's more to do, obviously, but this was a satisfying first step.


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September 21, 2005
U.S. Rep. Greg Walden was honored last week for his work on behalf of the Northwest pear industry.
Walden, R-Ore., received an appreciation plaque on Sept. 14 that was created by Hood River artist Trudi Klinger of Mystic Mud Studios. The award was presented to Walden on the nation's capital steps by Kevin Moffitt, president of the Pear Bureau Northwest.
"Congressman Walden has been a strong and consistent supporter of the Northwest pear industry from the beginning of his legislative career," said Moffitt. "We wanted to recognize and thank him for the many different aspects of support he has shown, which has ranged from export issues to helping get more fresh pears into the nation's school system."
Ralph Smiley, president of the Hood River County Farm Bureau, echoed Moffitt's affirmation of Walden's efforts on behalf of farmers. He said Walden had a good working knowledge of the tree fruit business because he had grown up on a cherry orchard in The Dalles and currently resides in Hood River. Since taking federal office in 1998, Walden has advocated for changes in foreign trade laws and other legislation to benefit American farmers.
"We think the world of him because he's really been working on our behalf most of his life – we just couldn't find a better person for that office" said Smiley.
Walden was primarily given the plaque for voting in favor of the Central American and Dominican Republic Free Trade Agreement (CAFTFA-DR). That legislation, which has been signed into law by President George W. Bush, is intended to "level the playing field" in the import/export market with six nations. Under CAFTA-DR, which has not yet taken effect, most tariffs on U.S. produce – some that top 60 percent of value – will be dropped. Walden believed it was only fair to change the import rules since 99 percent of imports from Costa Rica, El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, Nicaragua and the Dominican Republic arrive in domestic markets duty-free.
The inequity in trade occurred more than 20 years ago in an effort by the U.S. to help the ailing economies of Central America. Since these countries are all now growing in prosperity, Walden joined many other officials in the belief that it was time for U.S. farmers to also be given a break.
Walden contended that CAFTA-DR would grant customs agents more authority for inspections. And violators of environmental regulations would face stronger enforcement actions. He said another benefit of CAFTA-DR was that foreign competitors could no longer create regulations just to close markets to American imports.
"It's just the standard rule of economics, we produce fruit of terrific value and quality and now we can compete on the price," said Walden.
Mark Powers, vice-president of the Northwest Horticulture Council, said Walden has also played a key role in safeguarding orchards from foreign diseases and pests. For example, the federal official lobbied for a ban on Ya Pears from China until a fungal disease could be brought under control.
"Congressman Walden has been a valuable and strong friend of the fruit industry for a number of years and we just felt it was time to thank him for his hard work," said Powers.
Fred Duckwall, president of Duckwall-Pooley Fruit Company in Odell, said Walden always finds time to sit down and visit with local officials who make the trip to Washington, D.C.
"We always appreciate the hospitality, it makes you feel like your government is there to listen to you. He is very unassuming and always makes you feel at home," said Duckwall, who also serves as a Hood River Port Commissioner.
Walden said encouraging the Department of Agriculture to purchase pears for the school lunch program was an "easy sell."
"Kids like them and they are high in nutrition," he said.
In 1999, one of Walden's first actions was to get pears taken out of an export bill that sharply limited the shipping grade and size. Since that time, Walden has looked for every opportunity to help farmers in Oregon make a living in the complex global marketplace.
"I am very honored by this award. With my background, I realize how important the fruit industry is to a healthy economy in this region," Walden said.


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Impressive Timber Office Desk Timber Veneer Furniture Gallery At Corella Office Furniture - Furnishings is an important part of your office. Without tables, chairs and various other office accessories your office feels and look insufficient as compared to the competition. In the age of web we can make and run our own office from residence. It's not necessary for us to rest in a workplace for long hours and work very hard. If you are a consultant then you can comfortably work from your residence. Setting up a workplace in your residence is essential for you to recognize. In establishing you need to think about a great deal of things such as, which area will fit your office ideal? Which color is ideal fit to the sort of work you do? How would you organize the office, select your paint color and embellish baseding on your taste and mood of work. For all this you need to learn the best ways to select a space for the office, prepare and coordinate residence office furniture, select and prepare digital accessories, organize paper and completely use the workdesk area, prepare, lower disturbances in the house, and ultimately, budget plan.
The Impressive Timber Office Desk Timber Veneer Furniture Gallery At Corella Office Furniture above is a picture with the size 600 x 265 and the piece of timber office desk, selects the top collections along with ideal image resolution only for you all, and now this images is usually one of photos collections inside our very best photos gallery in relation to Stylish Timber Office Desk. Lets hope you will as it.
As you already know, The Captivating Office Furnitures has been a popular office design ideas for a few months ago and it has so many benefits. Hopefully, the can help you create a beautiful interior design for your home or apartment.


text: Attorney Profile Brooke Dubbeld Brooke Dubbeld is a native of St. Petersburg, Florida. She received her Bachelor of Science from Florida State University in both Communications and English. Following college graduation she attended New England School of Law in Boston, Massachusetts. She graduated from law school in 2002 and was admitted to the Florida Bar that same year. Prior to joining LeavenLaw she practiced in the areas of workers' compensation, personal injury and general civil litigation throughout the State of Florida. During that time Attorney Dubbeld acted as lead counsel in numerous trials. At her prior firm, Attorney Dubbeld served as the firm's appellate counsel, which required her to not only prepare appellate briefs, but also to argue in front of the First District Court of Appeals on several occasions. She began her practice primarily representing insurance companies and she has acquired extensive knowledge as to how insurance companies handle their claims and now uses that information to fight for the injured. Attorney Dubbeld is also a certified Florida Supreme Court Circuit-Civil Mediator. Education New England School of Law, Boston, Massachusetts (2002) New England Law Review Florida State University, Tallahassee, Florida (1999) Professional Florida Bar, 2002 Florida Supreme Court certified Circuit-Civil Mediator, 2013 Membership St. Petersburg Bar Association Junior League of St. Petersburg Pinellas Florida Association for Women Lawyers Membership Committee


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Sunday, 19 March 2017
Soya Sauce Fried Beehoon
This is a simple fried beehoon breakfast dish. You can find this at coffee shops selling economical fried beehoon and fried noodles. For just $1 you can have a packet of kosong fried beehoon, unless you add extra ' liao ' like luncheon meat, fried egg or veggies. But I always like mine kosong.
Soya Sauce fried beehoon
200gms beehoon, soak in tap water for 20 mins
50 gms taugeh
1 tsp minced garlic
1 knorr ikan bilis cube dissolved in 200ml warm water
2 tbsp light soya sauce
2 tbsp cooking oil or lard
Heat up oil in the wok and add in garlic and fry till lightly brown.
Add in the drained beehoon and fry for a minute.
Throw in the taugeh and give it a toss.
Drizzle the soya sauce at the sides of the wok and continue frying for a minute.
Slowly add in the ikan bilis stock and toss the beehoon with a pair of chopsticks.
Do not add in all the stock or the beehoon will be soggy.
When you think the beehoon is soft enough stop adding the stock.
Combine well and serve fried beehoon with fried sesame seeds on top and sambal chilli on the side.
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I'm a mum of two, who loves to design, create and experiment and learn new things. This blog is about my journey of discovery into arts, crafts and digital design and the processes involved. I'm also hoping to start a business this year so will be documenting my experiences.
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Monthly Archives: June 2013
DIY Recycled Newspaper Mini Basket
True to my personality, I have been distracted and I just couldn't help but want to try a recycled newspaper project that I pinned on my DIY/Crafts Pinterest Board a while ago. Above is the finished project from the tutorial … Continue reading
That was then, this is now!
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Recipe Tea Towel Designs
I have been asked by a local shop to come up with some designs for tea towels and have started on a collection of recipe based tea towel designs incorporating products that are available at the shop. I have yet to … Continue reading
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Ireland has been a country that I have wanted to visited for many years and I am pleased that I was able to have a very relaxing week away in County Kerry in the South West corner of Ireland. It … Continue reading


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The aim of this exercise was to use one image and then using digital processing methods, make two new versions of the image. The first of these has a greater prominence, the second image with less prominence for the subject.
(click on any image to enlarge)
This is the original image. The image has too many distractions with people close to the main subject as well as a distracting background with the people standing.
With slight manipulation, the image now is very flat. Still no cropping so the image still has the main distractions as above. The face is very dark and the histogram looks very flat and dark when viewed in LR CC.
Now with some small adjustments to the highlights and shadows, we can see the main focus of the lady is now full frame. All distractions have been taken away and a slight vignetting has helped focus the eye on the subject and darkened the background. More manipulation could have taken place by removing the bag in Photoshop but I decided this was enough to meet the requirements of the brief.


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Length: 1-2.5 hours
Certification: 2 years
National Certification Provided: CSI/OSHA/AAOS/ACEP.
Continuing Education Hours Provided: None
About CSI's Online Courses:
CSI's online courses are among the highest quality distance learning programs you'll find anywhere. Each interactive course uses cutting-edge Flash technology to provide an exciting learning experience for students. CSI's distance learning courses utilize a simple, user-friendly interface to help ensure that students don't waste time learning how to navigate through each course. Each course is professionally narrated, can be accessed anywhere and anytime, and provides a wealth of administrative features for educators.
How Blended Training Works:
1.Students logon to an CSI course using an access code. These access codes can be purchased individually by students or supplied by their instructor.
2.After completing the course and all of its interactivities, students are allowed to proceed to the course's secure written exam. Students must obtain a minimum score of 80% and will have multiple opportunities to successfully complete the exam.
3.Upon completion of the secure written exam, students are instructed to print out a Course Acknowledgment stating that they have completed the online component of the course and are ready to participate the optional skills practice.
4.Students can bring the certificate to an authorized Educational Center or Instructor for an on-site practice. The American's with Disabilities Act (ADA) wil not allow us to force you to do the manual hands on practice, but it is optional.
5.After completing the skills exam, students are issued an official CSI course completion card.
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Irene Briant: Sum of its Parts - Art Collector
| Courtesy: the artist and Bett Gallery.
|There's a rightness that occurs when things that are otherwise mundane are juxtaposed. Irene Briant explores serendipity and happenstance in this work – searching for the unexpected rightness that eventuates from the marriage of items that are often overlooked.
Up, down, off at a tangent, dead end, turn the corner, slow down, start afresh, proceed in a straight line, change direction. Sounds like life. My life. Anyone's life. The stuff of life, an accumulation of stuff – hoarded, used, discarded, broken, out of fashion, loved and unloved. Collected, selected, laid out here. Things and fragments of things. It's the form that interest me, and the colour. I don't see broken as bad. It's more often intriguing, more indicative of another life having been lived.
|Exhibition opens: 6-8pm Friday 3 July 2015
|Exhibition closes: 24 July 2015
|Location: Bett Gallery, 369 Elizabeth Street North Hobart TAS 7000
|Contact: 03 6231 6511
|Email: firstname.lastname@example.com


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I've got to show you one of the latest (and in my mind - GREATEST!) new floral products to come onto the market in the past year. Bind-IT tape is a great way to secure hand tied bouquets.
This tape doesn't seem to stick to anything - except itself. It stretches and creates a tight, waterproof wrap when wrapped around itself.
Be very careful when unwrapping not to fold the tape onto itself. It clings very quickly and forms a bond that cannot be separated.
This product is a great advantage over the green waxed string used so many years by florists to bind and wrap hand tied designs.
Leave this page and
check out more wedding galleries!


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Chances are . . .
Hattie Morahan and Aaron Staton star as a village teacher and U.S. air force officer whose chance meeting in Northern Ireland during World War II leads to a friendship that blossoms into something deeper.
Welcome to Masterpiece: My Mother and Other Strangers (PBS Distribution), coming to DVD on July 11. Also starring is Owen McDonnell as the teacher's dour but loving husband, along with Eileen O'Higgins, Michael Nevin, Des McAleer, Kate Phillips, Fiona Button and Ciarán Hinds.
During its recent UK broadcast, viewers and critics were deeply moved by this bittersweet tale. "No other recent drama has captured quite so keenly a sense of the complex, hidden, unspoken desires that can roil away beneath even the quietest surface," wrote the reviewer for The Telegraph, who added, "Hattie Morahan is superb."
Shot on the stunningly beautiful Ards Peninsula in Northern Ireland, the film portrays the culture clash when a U.S. bomber base is established near the fictional village of Moybeg in 1943, bringing hundreds of gum-chewing, swing-band-listening American airmen to a remote Ulster farming community, with its winsome women and stolid workingmen.
The action is framed from the point of view of a young boy, Francis Coyne (played by Nevin, with voiceover of Francis as an older man by Hinds). Francis's childhood is populated by strangers. On the one hand, there are the friendly Americans in their Jeeps and airplanes, who treat him like a little brother. Then there is his mother, Rose (Morahan), an upright Englishwoman who married Michael Coyne (McDonnell) and moved to his hometown, Moybeg, where she is raising their three children, teaching in the village school, and tending a grocery shop next to Michael's pub. Despite being a pillar of the community, Rose has never fit in. She speaks more properly than the locals, loves English literature, and has a lively interest in the wider world.
Into this isolated domain comes Captain Ronald Dreyfus (Staton), U.S. Army Air Forces, who encounters Rose during a walk on the heath. When they meet again, he quotes her a line from Tennyson's "The Lady of Shalott"—one of her favorite poems.
Captain Dreyfus is as reserved as Rose is. But in his capacity as base liaison officer, he has occasion to see her frequently: dealing with a fracas between airmen and regulars at the pub, arranging for an army nurse (Phillips) to care for a sick child, and planning a Christmas party for the school.
Both would-be lovers fight against the stronger feelings that are overwhelming them—emotions that are increasingly evident to those around them.
Wary of betraying her husband, Rose feels seized by some otherworldly force, a sentiment she can only recognize from a piece of literature—Emily Brontë's Wuthering Heights—which she quotes from memory: "Be with me always—take any form—drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you!"


text:
Listen to the audio version here
I was known as "the smiley new student with Cerebral Palsy" when I was nine years old. Even though that year was terrible. Even though I often felt awful about myself. It had become expected. Adults always told me, "You have such a positive attitude," with an air of awe and sadness.
On one hand, my life was the only one I had ever known, and I was living mine just as everyone else was living theirs. (None of the other kids got complimented for a content disposition, though.) At the same time, no one knew just how much my smile hid, as I coped with a barrage of ableism. I beamed kindness constantly because it put others at ease. A pleasant expression could engage people. It also absolved them, as I had a habit of grinning reflexively when my feelings were hurt.
At age ten, I self-injured for the first time after a major surgery, and a second time when I was thirteen. I didn't understand why I was doing these things. Only years later, as an adult did I realize that I used self-injury as a means of controlling the pain I felt - both physical and emotional.
During the summer of 2001 through to the winter of 2002, I struggled with what was commonly perceived as the "sin" of self-harming. I rarely let myself consider just how much church itself played a role in fostering the feelings of inadequacy, hopelessness, despair, and self-loathing that would eventually cause me to injure myself as an adult.
Six months after the healing conference, I took part in an outreach at a local park. It was just the kind of thing I usually enjoyed. But I started to feel the fingers of depression trying to pull me back down. I began to doubt.
What if everything I've come to believe isn't true, and nothing is really out there?
What if God isn't real?
These thoughts were crushing for me, particularly after being paraded around and berated for not having enough faith. I had held onto the belief that, even if I did not possess the faith to be healed on earth, my healing would come in heaven. Doubting God meant also doubting the existence of heaven.
It meant that I would be stuck in a body that was an affront to God. Trapped within an eternally anguished mind.
I would never be whole.
I would never have peace.
I self-injured that night, and my anxiety was temporarily allayed by physical pain. I also had tangible proof of my pain, so I could not smile it away.
I wore shirts that exposed my injuries to church, but no one noticed. I had silently hoped they would, while dreading it at the same time.
Instead, I confessed what I had done by email. For a week, I was too ashamed to look anybody in the eye and admit what I had done. I confessed it as a sort of dual-sin, where the real secret was not that I had injured myself intentionally, but that I was doubting my faith.
I was not greeted with anything resembling understanding. I was told by a fellow believer in no uncertain terms that I would go to hell if I didn't believe in Jesus. He also demanded to know where I thought Daniel - the friend I had recently lost to terminal illness - was if heaven didn't exist. These reactions only served to increase my sadness and hopelessness tenfold.
After a week, I told Tara, and to my chagrin, she told Liam. We had been hanging out late at his house with a group of friends, watching a movie. I was still very much in the grips of depression, anxiety and shame. When he gave us a ride home at around two in the morning, I realized what I was in for. I realized he knew.
I didn't feel relieved. I felt ganged up on. I resented Tara for telling him (even though, had the situation been reversed, I would have done the exact same thing). Liam was deeply concerned, but, I thought, missed the point of absolutely everything:
"So, Tara told me what happened…" he ventured cautiously. "Does this mean you want to die?"
"No," I answered feeling more misunderstood than ever. "It's not like that. It's...like a distraction. I got overwhelmed," I confessed in a quiet monotone. "It helped in a weird way, so that I wasn't thinking about how bad I hurt emotionally."
"You know, there's a verse that talks about how our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit. That we don't belong to ourselves but to God. It means that God doesn't want you to do that to yourself. He made you. You are His good work, and by disrespecting your body, you're disrespecting Him."
"Well, I'm not even sure if God's real, so…" I admitted, feeling empty.
Liam prayed for me, but I remained unmoved emotionally, and eventually he sang a worship song. It was just the three of us in his truck, parked in our parents' driveway at 3 AM. The song didn't cure me, but it did make me sure God was still around. And I was able to go forward, resolving not to sin again.
Three months later, I wrote:
Dear God,
I've been wondering a lot about heaven. What it's like. What we'll do there. Everything. The Bible says in the last days, everything You made will be destroyed and a new heaven and a new earth will be made… [It] says everyone will get a new body... I've always wondered if anyone will recognize me without CP?
My desperation to be healed stemmed not from self-hatred, but from a loathing that was taught in part within church walls. In my heart, I knew Cerebral Palsy was an intrinsic part of me. To separate me from it might make me socially acceptable, but it would also make me unrecognizable, even to myself.
It was for this reason, I often felt there was a battle raging inside me. Did I forfeit this specific piece of my identity in the name of faith? Was losing myself worth the price of a heavenly transformation I was not even sure I wanted?
Could I be me - with CP - and be loved anyway?
Eleven months later, I again found my life in turmoil. Personal issues, losses, and not knowing how to deal with how I felt about my disability all added up, and I relapsed.
After the second time, I made a serious effort to attempt to understand why I was doing what I was doing. For the first time, I looked into things I could do when I was feeling triggered. Simply promising myself that I would not do it again was not working - it was obviously more complicated than that. So, I made lists of alternative coping strategies and kept them close at hand.
I also made a decision that seems strange to me today, especially as a way to cope with the anxiety that led me to self-harm: I chose to get baptized.
Liam had been encouraging me to do this for awhile. He said it was a way for me to start fresh. A way to be delivered, once and for all, of my anxiety.
"We were baptized already, when we were two hours old," I explained. "Because weren't expected to survive."
"That wasn't your choice, though. That was your parents' choice. This would be different because it would be another way for you to recommit yourself to God. To be cleansed of the past and all the things that hold you back."
I thought about his offer, and a year to the day after I had hurt myself at age 20, I made the decision that I wanted to be baptized. To do this, I had exactly one meeting with one of the pastors on The Edge's rotating staff - Pastor Paul . This was someone I had never spoken to before. The meeting was quite somber, as he led me through Bible verses and explained the gravity of the choice I was making. I never felt comfortable or confident enough to explain why I was doing what I was doing. I thought that was best to remain between God and me. By now another month had passed, and I was feeling more anxious with each passing day.
My new anxiety?
What if I drowned?
To me, this was not an unfounded fear. At The Edge, they believed in fully submerging a person in a giant tank of water at the front of the church. It was the approximate size and depth of a hot tub. I have never been able to swim, and the idea of someone holding my head under water, even for a second, was terrifying.
The following day, I came to church, with my bathing suit on underneath my decidedly less fancy church clothes, and a set to change into after those I was wearing became soaked.
I gawked at the giant tank, wondering how on in the world I would even get in it. There was no railing, just steps going incrementally higher. The water was too deep for my crutches to even be useful (plus I didn't want them rusting).
Pastor Mark was on duty that day. I had only ever exchanged greetings with him - and this day was no different. There was no discussion about consent or logistics. When the time came for my baptism, he picked me up bodily and lifted me into the tank.
I was mortified.
I had no time to dwell over that, though, because after a few words were exchanged, I felt myself being guided backward and then my head being pushed down. As I desperately held my breath, I heard Pastor Mark say, "We need to get it all the way in there!" while forcing my head down.
It, not you. Even while receiving this sacred rite, I was dehumanized.
I had a moment of panic thinking my worst fear was about to come true.
Needless to say, I survived.
I wrote an email to several close friends afterward. It reads in part: I also want to take this opportunity to apologize to every single one of you. Because I realize that not only did my decision to self-injure hurt all of you, but the decision in and of itself was an extremely selfish one to make.
All these months, I had longed for transformation. I had repeatedly gotten the message that as I was, I was not enough. In truth, that email in its entirety sounds nothing at all like me. It sounds an awful lot like Liam, though. He was charismatic and well-liked. Liam was more than enough all by himself. Without even knowing it, I had lost myself in the hope of being embraced. I had traded myself for the hope of peace.
I experienced that peace for mere days, but self-loathing remained a loyal and unyielding companion.
Days after my baptism, I returned to college. I again felt isolated, having no community of any kind. Still, I did not relapse until I came home for the holiday break in December. By then, I had been depressed for six months, and my reason for harming myself changed. It was not about self-medicating my anxiety - it was about self-punishment.
I felt I deserved to be mistreated because of my disability. I was assaulted daily with ableist words and actions. And my gut instinct when someone hurt me was to reaffirm that hurt by turning it on myself.
I actually carried the object I had used to self-injure with me for a whole day afterward. I didn't use it, but in some unhealthy way, it helped me feel secure. Like I was armed. Even though I was arming myself against me.
Days later, Sally called and invited me over to her house. We ended up talking, and I told her what I had done.
Sally asked to see where I had injured myself, and she gave it a kiss. She prayed for me, and cried for me while I sat on her couch, feeling numb.
"I know you're really against this, but I do think you should talk to someone," she said gently, holding my hand.
"Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. I can't drive, so I have no way to get there. I wouldn't know where to go. I have to go back to school soon. I have no job. I have no money. And even if I had money, it would show up on something at my parents' house, because I'm still on their insurance. If they see anything about it, they'll want to know why I got help...and I just can't talk to them about this. I'm such a disappointment already…"
"I'll drive you. I know where you can go. I'll pay for it," Sally said honestly, tears shining in her eyes.
"No, I can't ask you to do that…" I said.
"You're not asking. I'm offering. Honestly, I can see you're overwhelmed, and I'm telling you I can take care of everything. I can even stay with you in the room while you talk to someone, if you want. All you have to do is say yes."
It took some more convincing, but Sally kept her word and found me an appointment two weeks later. In the meantime, even though she was going to TheOnly conference several states away, she called me to check in.
"How are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm okay… Honestly, I keep thinking that the time I was at your house was a dream. It feels too good to be true."
Sally laughed gently. "Well, I'm pretty sure it's not a dream. I was there, too."
"What if…." I ventured warily. "What if it happens again?"
"Then, I'll be there for you. You won't be alone. Okay?"
A week into 2003, my appointment was looming. My return to college was also mere days away, and I kept thinking something was going to happen to cause these plans to fall through. To me, the possibility of help felt as fragile as a house of cards. I did not want to put too much faith in it working out, but it was literally the only glimmer of hope I had.
That night, Sally showed up, and I left my parents' house. But from the moment I got into her car, my panic started to show itself.
"I don't know if I can do this. Maybe it was a bad idea. I'll probably be okay back at school, you know? It's not bad there."
My mind was conjuring all kinds of scary images: a sterile, white room that smelled like coffee and antiseptic. A clinical voice. That voice telling me there was something really wrong with me. That voice telling me they could help me, but only via some painful procedure. That voice telling me I was beyond help.
Sally just listened. Then she said, "You can do this, and I'm going to be right with you."
"Yeah," I said, feeling short of breath. "Yeah, but I still don't know." The idea of sharing my personal struggles with someone whose job I thought it was to listen and judge them sounded beyond terrifying.
Sally took my hand in one of hers, and held it while she drove. She talked to me some more and stayed very calm. We listened to music and then we stopped at a Dairy Queen on the way, as we had extra time, and I didn't even want to order anything, my anxiety was so rampant. While I normally enjoyed the chocolate chip cookie dough or mocha chip Blizzard, that time I stuck with the standby I always ordered as a little girl: a small vanilla ice cream cone.
I barely tasted it.
The closer we got, the more panicked I felt. I walked inside and waited with Sally in the waiting room. I had brought recent pictures to share with her, and I remember we looked at these while the minutes ticked by.
When we finally were invited back into the office, I was beyond relieved to see that it looked not like a doctor's office but like a living room, carpeted and comfortably furnished with couches and chairs. The counselor (who was a Christian) reminded me of my grandmother. These things made it exponentially easier for me.
While I sat across from the counselor, Sally sat unobtrusively in a chair by the wall. In fact, she never spoke a word at all, but it was beyond comforting to have her there with me. I filled out a piece of paper, checking boxes next to anxiety and depression, to indicate what I needed help with that evening.
Then, I talked with the counselor. I opened up with her about my trauma and she listened. She asked how I had dealt with what had happened, and I told her about the anxiety and depression. How the depression in particular made me feel like nothing I did would ever be enough, and that coupled with the anxiety, it made me want to hurt myself.
"Not to, like, die or anything - just to cope," I reassured her.
She nodded. "That makes sense."
"Oh. It does?"
"Yes," she said.
We spoke some more, and at the end of the session, she prepared to pray with me. "I have some holy oil here that I can anoint you with if you'd like," she offered, showing me the tiny jar.
"...You can if you want," I told her, not wanting to offend this woman who had helped me so much just by listening. Just by telling me my struggles made sense, instead of reaffirming the reactions I had already gotten inferring that injuring myself was outlandish, sinful or selfish.
"I think it's best…" the counselor said quietly, "that I respect your hesitance."
I blinked, surprised that she picked up on my apprehension and backed off, instead of plunging ahead, as those at The Edge were known to do.
Afterward, Sally was about to burst in the car on the way to drop me off:
"Wow. I'm so proud of you."
I squinted at her. "Why?"
"Because you just talked to her. You were calm. You opened up. You were really composed and you answered all her questions. It's not easy to do."
"I felt bad for you, just sitting by the wall the whole time. You weren't bored, were you?"
"No way! It was so cool to just be a fly on the wall and observe."
As we parked, I took the time to look her in the eye. "I don't know if I've said this, or if I ever can say it enough, but thank you. No one has ever done anything like this for me before, and I really, really needed it. I think, just hearing somebody in a professional setting tell me I wasn't overreacting really helped. Somebody listening to me, like what I said mattered. It was like I mattered, and I didn't deserve all the hurt I've gone through...well, it's just made a big difference."
"You don't deserve it. I'm glad to help. I'm glad I could be there."
"Thank you."
"You don't need to keep thanking me."
"Yes, I do."
It's been nearly fourteen years since that night. And it hasn't been easy. There have been multiple times over the years where I have encountered triggers that caused an impulse in me to self-harm. (Particularly during church youth group when a graphic video was shown of someone injuring themselves and the aftermath the next morning. There was no warning about the content of this video.)
Many things have helped me cope in the ensuing years, and though none of them were learned in the church, I feel they are worth sharing. The summer after April comforted me through the onset of my anniversary reaction, I bought a PTSD workbook and began to face what happened for the first time. In the front of the book, it had a place for names and phone numbers for "safe people" to contact in the event that I was triggered by the material in the workbook.
While I never used the safe people while going through the workbook, I did transfer the concept to my recovery for self-harm. I started speaking to specific people and asking them if they would mind if I called them to tell them when I was triggered. I have not needed these people frequently - perhaps once every couple of years - but I do reach out to them. They change as my needs and friendships change.
I also read a book about children who had experienced abuse and trauma. While the book was not particularly well-written, one excerpt stayed with me. In it, the author spoke about a child in therapeutic care who was visiting her family for the weekend. On that visit, the child told her mom that she was having thoughts about hurting a sibling. The little girl's mother panicked and called the therapist, who explained that the little girl had been taught to verbalize her unhealthy thoughts. If the child verbalized them, she would not act them out. Secrecy was where the damaging behavior could thrive, and without it, she was a much healthier person.
Though my situation was very different, I internalized that passage of the book and made it work for me. Today, I contact my safe people to tell them I am triggered and admit to any other unhealthy behavior linked to self-harming, even if I have not hurt myself. These things help to keep me safe.
I share this because self-harm is not widely discussed or understood. I think it's important to share the real issues I faced while attending church.
Countless people have offered to pray for my physical healing, heedless of the message it sent:
That I was broken, worthless and incomplete.
While many people in the faith community made a negative impact, Sally stepped up to help me. This set me on the path of healing that I can proudly say I am still on today.
You may never know what long-term effects your actions will have on those around you.
If a loved one opens up to you and shares that they have self-harmed, you being there for them just may make all the difference.
And if you have struggled with self-harm, know that you are not alone.
There is hope.
Self harm for me, was about many things, but mainly, it was about control. I craved having control over when, where, and for how long I experienced pain, so it was no longer a random onslaught. So it was predictable. So I could say "enough" when it got to be too much.
Today, I know that I exert just as much control over my pain by choosing not to hurt myself. By being vigilant about my triggers, I am being smart and taking care of myself. Every time I offset that urge for a second, or a minute, I am in control. By reaching out to someone, by being honest, I reaffirm that I am worth loving, and that I do not deserve the abuse that I experienced.
While I will always struggle with these impulses, it's what I do with them that matters.
|[Image is: My arm with the word LOVE, flowers and a heart drawn on it. Participating in a To Write Love on Her Arms event in 2010, which raises awareness about self-injury.]
My enemy lives
Within me
Along with my strength
To fight it.
If I can keep
Everything will
Be all right.
If I never think I
Beat it.
If I remember
I have the power,
All will help
Me in deciding
Not to hurt
Instead of
written January 30, 2010
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text:
Whitefish is a small Montana town of about 5000 people. Its beginnings were rooted around the rail system and the city built around the tracks. Today, freight and passenger trains still travel through the town and Whitefish is notable as one of Amtrak's top ten stops.
Of special interest, the Stumptown Museum, located in the historic depot building, includes many railroad artifacts as well as community memorabilia and photographs. In 1990 the Depot was restored by the Historical Society to its original 1927 Glacier National Park chalet-like appearance. Great Northern Locomotive #181, one of only seven of its kind ever built, can be seen at the museum.
Considered by many as one of America's most scenic and breathtaking places in the country, the area is wrapped in the majesty of the Rocky Mountains and offers spectacular views into Glacier National Park.
The Big Mountain Ski Area, one of Montana's best ski areas, and Whitefish Lake make visiting there a true joy.
This small, friendly Montana town offers the best in four-season recreation, while the outstanding restaurants and quaint shops make it a true gem.
Business Listings
Financial Institutions
Food and Beverage
Health and Fitness
Lodging and Camping
Montana Experiences
Museums and Galleries
Places of Worship
Recreation and Outdoors
Tours and Guides
Transportation and Travel
Area Maps


text:
Monday, May 6, 2013
Marin Alsop, music director
John Adams: Shaker Loops
Jennifer Higdon: Concerto 4-3
Time for Three, string trio
New York Premiere
Sergei Prokofiev: Symphony No. 4 (1947 version)
Baltimore and Bethesda, Maryland
Population 619,493 and 60,858
Founded 1729 and 1871
Orchestra Founded 1916
Baltimore—otherwise known as Charm City—is a colorful, diverse city that is Maryland's largest and its economic hub. Known for the Inner Harbor, quirky neighborhoods and the world-renowned Johns Hopkins Hospital and University of Maryland Medical Center, the city is home to the Maryland Science Center and National Aquarium, state-of-the-art stadiums for the Baltimore Orioles and Baltimore Ravens, and the world-class art collections of the Baltimore Museum of Art and the Walters Art Museum. Baltimoreans take immense pride in their city, yet continue to welcome visitors with down-to-earth, small-town spirit and hospitality.
Bethesda is a bustling urban community in Montgomery County, just north of Washington, DC. Downtown is home to 20 art galleries, more than 250 restaurants, two live theaters, music and dance studios and numerous boutiques. The area is renowned for three of the world's leading biomedical research centers—the National Institutes of Health, National Library of Medicine and the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center.
Baltimore Symphony Orchestra
The Baltimore Symphony Orchestra, admired for its pursuit of artistic excellence, has attracted a devoted national and international following while maintaining deep bonds throughout Maryland with innovative education and community outreach initiatives. In addition to the Joseph Meyerhoff Symphony Hall, where the orchestra has performed for 30 years, the BSO is a founding partner and the resident orchestra at the Music Center at Strathmore in Bethesda. With its opening in 2005, the BSO became the nation's only major orchestra with year-round venues in two metropolitan areas.
The BSO made musical history in September 2007, when Maestra Marin Alsop led her inaugural concerts as the Orchestra's twelfth music director, the first woman to head a major American orchestra. The BSO has achieved critical acclaim for its recordings. In 2009, the BSO and Marin Alsop released Bernstein's Mass, which rose to number six on the Classical Billboard Charts and received a Grammy nomination for Best Classical Album.
For more than 80 years, the BSO has maintained a vibrant educational presence throughout Maryland. The 2012-2013 season marks the fifth year of OrchKids™, a year-round program that provides music education to Baltimore's neediest youngsters at no cost. For more information, visit bsomusic.org.


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This is a relatively new composition, merging a photo of group photo of horses greeting each other with a rock and lichen image. I'm happy with the way this one has evolved. It is available for sale in a variety of sizes and finishes (everything from photo paper to canvas or metal) on my new
Fine Art America website. Look in the "Horses" gallery.


text:
Nelson is an ace new Londony graphic novel, the result of a collaboration between the creative minds of 54 UK comic creators.
Stitch London supremo, Deadly Knitshade, shares workspace with three of those responsible for the book at the Fleece Station in Depford. She kindly filled us in on the story:
It's about a gal growing up in London. Her dad was inspired to name her Nel after she was conceived under a billiards table in a London pub.
The book features the Notting Hill Carnival, Dagenham (you can even see the Ford factory in the background of one pic), a lovely London bus garage, St Pauls, some peeks at 60s London shops and styles, and a scene set in the chaos of the July 7th bombings. It's also a glimpse into the suburbs of London's past and present with old school corner shops, Wimpy, cinemas, school playgrounds, and greasy spoons. The ever-present double decker bus trundles through many of the stories too.
All the profits from sales of the book go to housing charity Shelter and to get the money rolling in, Ms Knitshade has created Little Knitted Nel, who will be auctioned off at the public launch party at Gosh! Comics tomorrow night.
Knitted Nel is a one-of-a-kind, complete with purple pants (apparently folk are always asking if Knitshade's knitty characters have knickers and this one does). She's the Nel of 2012 - a year after the novel's close - and so a very special continuation of the story. If you want to bid for lovely Little Knitted Nel, email Gosh firstname.lastname@example.com with the subject heading "I want to bid on Knitted Nel!" and your bid and contact details in the body of the email.
Nelson the graphic novel is available to buy at £18.99 and would make a rather lovely Londony gift. Join the party at Gosh, Berwick Street, Soho on Friday 25 November from 6pm.