text:
|Anakin Skywalker
|Biographical information
Uncertain because his begetting lacked this
He stuck a fork in the outlet
|Physical description
Emo-like Human
Male (unconfirmed)
|Hair color
|Eye color
Filled with tears
Right arm has cybz
|Chronological and political information
|Known masters
|Known apprentices
- Dooku: "I sense many whines in you, Young Skywalker, but you don't use them."
- Anakin: "You'll find I'm full of surprises."
- — Dooku and Anakin, in battle
Anakin Skywalker, also "Mannequin", Annie, Ani, Waaanikin, The Emo One, The Chosen One Who Cries or Allah Gold (AKA The peaceful is willing to) was a legendary, very tall, very whiny hippie Jedi. He was the biggest crybaby the Jedi had ever seen in 25,000+ years. His tears ran like a mighty river down his pudgy, scarred face. Anakin never had a father... and not even in an emo "father of mine, where have you been" way. His
monster mother, Shmi Skywalker, had relations with the Force, or maybe that one ugly Muun, Darth Plagueis, who could influence the midi-chlorian sperm cells to create... life. Anakin Skywalker became a powerful Jedi Knight, a whiny neurotic, a self-satisfied git, and the unlikely lover of Padmé Amidala. One thing Anakin Skywalker was not, however, was Darth Vader. They were completely different people! Honestly. Darth Vader was a bad-ass Sith Lord who inspired generations. Anakin Skywalker... well, just wasn't. So if you're looking for a Darth Vader article, follow the link. This is only about the pussy from the prequels. He was kind of cool in the clone wars but quickly became a whiny ass again.
The Phantom TearsEdit
- "Will..." *sniff* "I ever see you again, Mommy?"
- ―Anakin, leaving his mama, as the tears begin to fall
George LucasThe Maker first created Anakin Skywalker way, way back when, at the dawn of time. His mother, Shmi Skywalker, was an honest, hardworking slave on the desert world of Tatooine. Let's face it, she had to be honest and hardworking, because she was none too pretty to look at. Shmi made the dubious claim that Anakin had no father. Right. Some speculate that she must have had a crazy wild night with some dude she later called "the Force," but little did she know that was his porn name. Weeks later she felt something in her belly, and it wasn't gas; actually, it was Ani's first tantrum. Shmi raised the young Anakin while she was traded among a series of owners, including Gardulla the Hutt and eventually the junk-dealer Watto, the pan-ethnic jewish merchantToydarian and desperately horny guy who ran a shop in Mos Espa. He was single and had loads of cash, but couldn't marry anyone (or anything) so he bought a woman... with a kid, Anakin Skywalker. Not bad of a deal, or so he thought.[1] Anakin and his mother toiled away at Watto's Place, earning nothing but their room and board and crappy meals. Anakin earned his keep by repairing old machinery. Well, it's not as if he had any other talents. He certainly couldn't act.
Purely by chance, Anakin was discovered by Darkman, er... Qui-Gon Jinn, who was passing by Tatooine after having escaped the Mafia on Nabooboo. The meeting was entirely a coincidence, but Qui-Gon mistakenly believed that the young boy was mystically gifted and that meeting him was "the will of the Force" or something. Qui-Gon was always saying things like that. Anakin had Qui-Gon immediately pegged for a sucker and dragged him and his traveling companions, including Jar Jar Binks, a postgraduate Obi-Wan Kenobi, and a girl called "Padmé", back home to meet his mom. He also grabbed Padmé and dragged her into his room to show her the droid he had built... which was... C-3PO? C-3PO's attempt at comic relief fell flat, and Padmé wandered off, leaving Anakin to cry a river of tears. Later, after a long, dreary dinner, Qui-Gon decided to bring Anakin back to the
Westboro Baptist Church Jedi Temple on Coruscant to become a Jedi.
Unfortunately, they had no money to buy slaves (otherwise they would have stocked up on hot Twi'lek girls). So they had to bet a bunch of money on podraces. This podrace took approximately eight years from start to finish. Anakin was a barely competent racer and relied mostly on luck and plot convenience... and even so, he'd never even finished a race, let alone won. More often than not, the superstar Dug podracer Sebulba came in first; either him or Dick Dastardly. Jabba the Hutt himself oversaw the races, and he invited Gardulla to watch (best not to speculate how their evening turned out). The race began, and Sebulba immediately zoomed out into the lead, but Anakin slowly caught up, because the script said he would. Truth be told, Ben Quadinaros should have won, but with a flick of his pen, George Lucas sabotaged his racer, leaving Anakin to cross the finish line number one. The mysterious and deadly Darth Fodesinbeed Annodue did the announcing and color commentary for the race, which was really, really annoying.
Before Qui-Gon left Tatooine with his newly bought slave-boy, he tested Anakin's blood for a midi-chlorian count and was stunned at the results. He needed a second opinion, so he asked Vegeta what his scouter said. Vegeta shouted, "IT'S... quite high, actually." Thus convinced that Anakin was the Chosen One or something, Qui-Gon brought Anakin to Coruscant. A party broke out all across Tatooine when they heard the news bratty Annie was leaving. The party lasted three days. Even the Hutts joined in. A true celebration indeed. (In fact, after the Battle of Endor, when Palpatine died, they just recycled the HoloNet footage from Ani's departure.) They called it Boonta Eve, which in some ancient language means "Kid Gone!"[2]
Little Ani was brought to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. The Jedi Council's reaction to the young boy was decidedly negative. Yoda was not amused with the little fat boy with a Snickers bar in one hand and a tear falling down his pudgy face. Mace Windu, the bald man sitting next to Yoda, was unimpressed. None of the Jedi wanted to train him. Mace Windu said he was "too old," meaning "too white," and Yoda couldn't stand him, and Beldar Conehead hated his tiny head, and Fiona the Ogre was too busy pleasuring Yoda to even notice. Yoda told Gin, er... Jinn that "This boy is not the Chosen One, but a whiny bitch filled with fear." So, unfortunately, it fell upon Obi-Wan Kenobi to train Anakin as his Padawan. This marked the first time Obi-Wan shouted "Noooooooo!"
Obi-Wan tried to tell Qui-Gon, "The boy is dangerous, and his tears will get in the way of everything he does." Little Ani told Jinn, in a cutesy way, that he didn't want to be a problem.[2] Qui-Gon, however, ignored the advice of every other Jedi in the galaxy and left to bring Queen Amidala (who he still didn't realize was Padmé) back to Nabooboo and fight off the robots of the Trade Federation. He also brought Jar Jar Binks along, hoping to throw him quietly out an airlock on the trip over. It is worth mentioning here that prepubescent Anakin had started perving on Padmé ever since he dragged her into his room to show off his droid. He started pestering her with faux-cute come-ons, like "Are you an angel?" and "Can we live together?" and "Can I please suck on your boobies?" Padmé, however, did not return the creepy boy's affections and thus become a sex criminal. The group arrived at Nabooboo. Unfortunately, the battle became needlessly complicated. Anakin somehow wound up in a crappy old Naboo N-1 starfighter with R2-D2 in the astromech droid slot. Then, after a panic attack and half an hour of sobbing, he used his experience playing Nintendo Wii to single-handedly destroy the droid control ship. Unfortunately, back on the planet, Qui-Gon had been challenged to a duel by Darth Maul, who PWNed the old hippie good. With his dying words, Qui-Gon told Kenobi to train the boy. Well? Did he? He did... unfortunately. Little did Obi-Wan know that Qui-Gon was actually saying "Train him," as in the Coruscant slang term for "throw-him-in-front-of-a-mutha-effing-train".[2]
Growing up in kids' booksEdit
- "Master Obi-Wan didn't let me go to the Fall Out Boy concert, so I spent the day cutting"
- ―Anakin SkywalkerThroughout his adolescence, Anakin had a series of adventures that didn't really lead anywhere. This is because George Lucas deemed him valuable to a certain "junior reader" demographic and pumped out many such books. He constructed his first lightsaber in the caves of Ilum, faced an imaginary Force vision of Darth Maul, kicked its ass, and woke up with a pretty blue lightsaber blade. Apparently, this was one of those morality mini-games. If he'd joined forces with Maul, he'd have gotten a red blade. If he'd leapt into Maul's arms and made passionate love to him, he'd have gotten a purple blade.
Anakin's adventures as a Padawan alongside Obi-Wan were repetitive and mostly pointless. He was friends with Ferus Olin and Siri Tachi... then not friends with them, then friends again, then felt betrayed by them, then betrayed them back, then fought with them, then passed notes back and forth to them in class. It was all very, very emo. He went to Hoth, to Falleen, to Korriban, protected a senator here, tracked down a rogue Jedi there, negotiated a border dispute, blah blah blah. There was one interesting mission where he and Obi-Wan attempted to track down a missing Jedi named Vergere, who had last been spotted on the planet Zonama Sekot. They never found her, but Anakin did get a sweet biological starship out of the deal... which died because he forgot to water it properly. Oh, and Anakin used the Force to kill a guy in a hideous, hideous way. No foreshadowing there. He later got arrested for crying too much and cried during his three days in jail. He was let out due to his whining. Even Cad Bane hated him.
Attack of the TearsEdit
- "We've been assigned to protect Padmé Amidala after a terrorist attack on her life."
"Padmé? Ooh, boobs! Do you think she still likes me?"
"Anakin, did you hear me? Someone's trying to kill her!"
"Should I wear something that shows of my killer abs?"
- ―Obi-Wan and Anakin
In 22 BBY Senator Padmé Amidala (no longer Queen), a.k.a. Panda Bear, was the target of an attempted assassination by Zam Wesell. The Jedi Council assigned Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker as her personal protection to escort her back home. Anakin had become a tall, whiny emotional horny teenager and didn't care in the slightest that someone was attempting to kill Padmé, only that he could see her again and score, now that he was legal age. Before meeting Padmé that day, Anakin spent many hours "cleaning the pipes." Obi-Wan and Anakin rode up in the elevator to Padmé's apartment, and Anakin could not hide his raging boner from his Jedi Master... who probably misinterpreted it... but when the elevator doors opened, Anakin was met by the ultimate boner-killer, Jar Jar Binks, who gave him a big hug and started shouting things like "mooie mooie" and "me so smilin," and Anakin had a perfect opportunity to kill him right then and there, but he didn't because he was a wimp.
Finally, Anakin was confronted by Padmé, his unrequited love who was ten years older than him or whatever... and Anakin began sputtering. "Ooh, lady, beautiful, smell good, boobies, pretty, fishnets, touch rub woman pooter happy!" Padmé replied, "Um, yes, well, nice to see you again." Anakin nodded shyly and replied, "I pleasure myself to your picture." Then there was a very long, awkward pause, and they started talking about the assassination attempt[3].
Their plan to catch the killer was simple: wait for somebody to kill Padmé, then run after the killer really fast, and then they'd know who it was. Zam Wesell made another attempt to kill her that night, this time with a couple of poison worms dropped in her window by a floaty-poison-worm-dropping droid. Eh. Did I mention Zam Wesell was a shapeshifter? She never actually used any shape-shifting abilities in any of her assassination attempts, though. Obi-Wan and Anakin waited for the worms to crawl onto Padmé's face before saving her, because there was more dramatic tension that way. Then they had a bizarre chase scene all over Coruscant trying to catch Zam. Obi-Wan jumped out Padmé's window (which was hundreds of stories in the air) and managed to catch the floaty droid somehow, while Anakin stole Senator Simon Greyshade's airspeeder. What a dick.
After a long, drawn-out, utterly implausible chase through the buildings and traffic of Coruscant, Obi-Wan and Anakin caught Zam Wesell in a weird high-class cantina called the Outlander Club filled with glittered-covered prostitutes. Anakin cleverly bested Zam by cutting off her hand with his lightsaber! Ha! Bet she never saw that one coming. Because it was really kind of vindictive and unnecessary. Anyway, it turned out Zam had been working for the awesome, badass MANDALORIAN!! bounty hunter Jango Fett (who showed up and killed her with a saberdart before she could rat on him).
Obi-Wan Kenobi went on a detective hunt for Jango, but Anakin was such a whiny emo wimp that he got scared and ran off to Nabooboo with Padmé to "keep her safe." R2-D2 was sent along with Anakin and Padmé to act as her "Virgin Alarm." The two awkward young adults spent a lot of time doing nothing on Nabooboo, sharing uninspired dialogue, meeting Padmé's parents, rolling around in a field of wheat and pretending it was accidental, going to state fairs and laughing while winning kewpie dolls, etc. Anakin made extra sure that no one would sneak into Padmé's bedroom and rifle through the panties and lingerie in her armoire by carefully cataloging the contents every night and every morning to see if any were missing, and also rubbing the soft fabric on his face to see if there were any variations in temperature that would indicate an intruder had touched them.
Eventually, in a scene that crackled with passion, or possibly just static electricity from the clothes dryer, Anakin and Padmé met in a dark room next to a fireplace, snuggled together on a couch, and Anakin revealed every deep, dark, perverted fantasy he'd ever had about the Senator who was ten years older than he was. Padmé nodded nervously and thanked God that she was keeping an audio recording of all this, just in case she ever had to have Anakin arrested later on. They shared their first creepy kiss, but then Padmé cock-blocked him just for the heck of it. The midi-chlorians in Anakin's testicles began to turn blue, and his attempts to get Padmé in the sack became more and more desperate. He even tried going on an insane tirade about how much he hated sand, hoping she'd somehow take pity on him, but even that didn't work. So finally, Anakin gave up and ran off to Tatooine to cry to his mommy.
Unfortunately, when Anakin arrived at Tatooine, he discovered his mommy had been raped and murdered by Sand People, so he got all mad and fussy and committed the most whiny genocide in the history of the galaxy, slaughtering Sand People by the dozen, including women and children. Even worse, some believe he may have made some of the Sand People arrange themselves in naked pyramids while he pointed at their wangs. Then he showed up at Padmé's doorstep, drunk and rambling about how he'd committing a mass murder, thinking maybe this was the one thing that would convince her to be his girlfriend, but no dice. More frustrated than ever at not being able to get laid, Anakin ran off to Geonosis to fight in the Clone Wars.
Unfortunately, Anakin was a moron and landed his ship next to a weird robot factory that looked like something out of Mega Man 3. Anakin, Padmé, C-3PO, and R2-D2 played through the factory levels, but unfortunately, they ran out of extra lives and got captured by Jango Fett and Count Dookie and sent to the Geonosis Arena, where the losers go. Only the whiny, bitchy pleading of Ani spared the group from immediate execution.
Out of the blue, Padmé told Ani she loved her... uh, him. Turns out that Panda Bear didn't care for the emotional brat at first, but soon realized that there was more than just tears to Ani. They were about to start humping like rabbits, but Ani was jealous that he didn't bang-bang Aayla Secura... Oh what a shame. But if he had done it with her, not only would the fanboys want to be an emotional, horny bratty teenager, they would fall in love with the man who swept the sexy hot Twi'lek off her feet. I bet you want to sweep Aayla Secura off her feet, too? Eh? Well, too bad, she's married. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... erm... Anyway.[4]
Count Dookie couldn't take it! He took out his ultimate weapon and cut off Ani's arm!!!. That was a bad mistake. For Ani, the tears rolled down his face, and in a matter of minutes... The planet of Geonosis was engulfed in a massive flood. Mace Windu showed up next, impressing everyone with his baldness, and told that motherfracking whiny bitch to shut up. And did he? He did...Thank God. It was then when Ani and Pandabear, along with her toy droid C-3PO, a.k.a. See-Three-Pee-O.o, and R2-D2, went back to Nabooboo yet again. Crybaby Ani and Panda Bear got married, and so did the droids... Wait? What?[3]
Several seasons of Epic Fail, and TearsEdit
Anakin then spent several years fighting side by side with Obi-Wan Kenobi in the Clone Wars. For some reason, nobody ever noticed that he and Padmé were married, because it was a super-secret marriage performed by a droid from Las Vegas. The Jedi Council gave Anakin his very own Padawan, Ahsoka Tano, on the advice of Yoda himself, and together, the two formed the Whiny Bitch Club. Ahsoka, or No Soup-a With-a Buffet, who was also a whiny emotional bitch (thanks God for this great pairing!), fought alongside with Anakin, and the two of them shared a very creepy relationship of awkward jokes, murder, underage sex, and karaoke.
Let me explain about The Clone Wars. No, there is too much, and it all sucks. Let me sum up. Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Ahsoka spent years fighting Dooku, General Grievous, and Asajj Ventress, but nobody ever actually managed to kill anybody else, except for dozens of minor characters who kept dying all around them. Also, Anakin went to the fantasy world of Mortis, where he met The Father, The Daughter, and The Son, and learned he was in fact The Chosen One, whatever the hell that means. They also fought Nightsisters, peacenik New Mandalorians and the semi-tough Death Watch.
Anakin soon discovered he was bad with women, and somehow found
love care and moral support with his "Master" Obi-Wan Kenobi (a heterosexual Jedi who happened to have a drinking problem, but didn't enjoy "pink stuff"), who he kindly referred to as "Oh Big One" Kenobi. In order to hide his "rose side," Anakin pretended to be macho and played up his sham marriage to Panda Bear, although, let's face it, whenever they had sex, Anakin was thinking of Obi-Wan, while Padmé was thinking of Mon Mothma. Finally, in the lonely fields of the Clone Clone Wars (some party in Outer Rim, some say all night long rave parties), Anakin found love with "Oh Big One". Ani never quit trying to "recruit" Kenobi to the "rose side".
There was also the horny No Soup-a With-a Buffet, Ahsoka Tano, who he kept on running into before he could engage with his wife or his master. It's a shame she got a lightsaber shoved up her ass before she could have quadruple... (um, yeah, you get the picture) with "Oh Big One" and Panda Bear. The two Jedi became great whiny bitches, and together they will destroy your planet!!... erm... Sith Mega-Super-Overlords, with their tears. Pssh. Though, of course that won't happen because Ashoka, yes Ashoka, died early and horribly, which made Ani more of a friggin' crybaby. Though he had a hot wife to go back to for comfort, wink wink.[5]
Revenge of the TearsEdit
- ―Anakin, burning without limbs
It was just another typical day in the Clone Wars, when all of a sudden the Battle of Coruscant broke out. General Grievous invaded Coruscant and kidnapped Palpatine, who had secretly planned it all along, which doesn't make much sense, but anyway, Anakin and Obi-Wan jumped in their tiny little Eta-2 interceptors and flew off to rescue the Supreme Chancellor. Suddenly, Anakin and Obi-Wan realized they were no longer computer animation but actual flesh and blood! (Everything else was still computer animation.) Realizing that he was once again being portrayed by Hayden Christiansen, Anakin cranked up his whining again, which had subsided somewhat during the Matt Lanter years.
Anakin triumphantly... er, crashed his starfighter in General Grievous's flagship. Then he and Obi-Wan made their way into Count Dooku's command tower. Dooku appeared and challenged the two Jedi to a duel. "You can't win," explained Dooku. "I'm a main character and immune to death." Anakin smirked and said, "Look again, Dooku! We're not CGI anymore. That means we're back in the movies, and I can actually kill you." "Oh, shit," said Dooku, and the fight began. Dooku managed to defeat Obi-Wan, but Anakin was suddenly filled with the Force and the irresistible power of plot convenience and defeated Dooku, slicing off his hands and rendering him helpless.
Palpatine cackled and said, "Good. Kill him." Anakin was confused for a moment, saying, "Wait, wait, that's not the Jedi way. Are you sure?" "Oh, yeah, yeah," said Palpatine. "I mean, for one thing, it'll be a great public image boost for me. We can make a movie about it and stuff. And besides, doesn't it feel good to be out of that Clone Wars show where nobody can die? Let's just kill him to celebrate." So Anakin shrugged and cut Dooku's head off. It didn't feel as cool and cathartic as he was hoping, but hey, he hadn't seen a head bounce around since Jango Fett, and every little bit helps.
So Anakin set Palpatine free, carried his master Obi-Wan on his shoulders, and set off to find an escape pod or something. Obi-Wan woke up to find himself staring at Anakin's butt. No, seriously, that's canon. Check the novelization. Matthew Stover has a weird sense of humor. And it definitely furthers the "rose side" bits of this article, which were not written by Enochf, but who kept them in because you don't go around deleting other users' shit; you work around it. Anyway, Anakin then triumphantly... got himself captured by General Grievous and had to be rescued by R2-D2. He made everyone swear not to mention that part of the rescue to the news media when they got back. He was able to defeat Grievous, but not kill him, because killing off two major characters in a single battle would be overkill, and would consequently give Obi-Wan little to do in the second act except stare at Anakin's butt some more. So Grievous escaped, and Dooku's flagship exploded and began descending into the atmosphere of Coruscant. Fortunately, Anakin had some leftover skill points in Piloting from his younger days and managed to crash-land in a curiously uninhabited portion of the giant city-planet.
Well, that was exciting. Now things got very, very boring in Anakin's life. He had an emotional reunion with his sweet, loving, sexy wife Panda Bear, who informed him that she was pregnant, and the most likely candidates for the baby daddy were Bail Organa, Watto, Fang Zar, Mon Mothma... or, dun-dun-dun, Anakin. "That's wonderful," said Anakin, through gritted teeth, muttering under his breath, "Why did those stupid midi-chlorians have to break the condom, why, why, why?"
From that point on, Anakin had problems. A lot of problems. As you can see, he had already led an emotional life. First, his mommy died... I mentioned that, right? Then he discovered his sweet, loving, sexy wife, who he was mildly attracted to, was pregnant. And one night he experienced his most emo Force vision of all, discovering his wife was prophesied to die in childbirth! Anakin had to save his wife, so the two of them could have much relations, or else Anakin's tears would flow like a mighty river.
Palpatine somehow got word of this. First he suggested killing the baby, because he always suggested killing people as the first solution to any problem. Then he played on the whiny emotional horny Anakin's fears and told him about Darth Plagueis, who might kinda sorta be able to create life with the Force or something. He promised that the Dark Side could safe Padmé's life, and Anakin and Padmé could even keep their own doctor. When all this was happening, Obi-Wan should have slapped him, but that would only have made matters worse, much worse. If he laid one finger on his pudgy face, well... WAAAAAAaaaa!!... erm... well... he once killed Count Dookie for a Milky Way bar.
Anakin was obviously a Dark Jedi (EMO). He was so emo that he was cutting his veins in his face, hence his scar. Fortunately, that's all false. The Expanded Universe can't really decide where the hell Anakin got his scar. Anyway, Anakin spent several days whining about the Jedi Council, whining about his wife, whining about politics, whining about the Dark Side, and the plot just dragged to a screeching halt.
In 19 BBY, Little Ani was a major pain in the ass. Not only did he fail to keep a Padawan, he failed himself. Turns out that the Council hated Ani even more. Also, his sexy wife was dying from childbirth. His former master, Yogurt, and that bald black guy said that if Ani doesn't straighten out, they would destroy his planet. But there was no hope for that emotional horny teenager... No hope. Even his appointment to the Jedi Council proved to be useless. The crazy confused old Supreme Chancellor said that Ani can be the eyes, nose, ears, penis, ass... of the Republic if he can stop crying dammit!! Did that work? No. Eventually, that crazy old man revealed to Ani he was a Sith and started saying things like "Gooooooood" and "I feeeeeeeel your anger" and "Come on, join me. You can live in my penthouse." Anakin thought and thought and thought, until his little brain, assuming the emotional prick had a brain, couldn't think any longer.[6] Finally, he decided to tattle on Palpatine to his Jedi Council masters. "Um, so, um, Jedi Council? Um, I was, like, talking? With Palpatine? And he said he was a Sith? And, um, that's bad? Because Sith are bad? And he's gonna get in trouble? So you Jedi guys should totally send him to detention and stuff."
The badass Mace PWN Windy told the crybaby to remain in the Council, so he can deal with that old man. Then it turned out the "old man" did a cool flip through the air and stabbed three Jedi Masters with his ultimate weapon. Didn't see that one coming, huh? Palpatine could still do the cool CGI Sith stuff like in the Clone Wars show. The bald man and old man engaged in a duel with their ultimate weapons. Who was bigger? Erm... I mean, who won? Well, come on. That bald man kicked the old man to the ground. "AND YOU STAY DOWN YOU CRAZY OLD MAN, YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME IS THE LORD!" When this all happened, the crybaby ignored the bald man. Completely ignored him. Eventually, back in the Council room, little Ani got horny and chose to keep it real. He wanted to turn to the big bad blackness of the DARK SIDE to save his Panda Bear. When all this was happening, little Ani shed a single tear from his pudgy face. His emotions told himself to go help save sexy Panda Bear, go save that old man, go learn that one Darth Plagueis power thingy, turn to the dark side, get me a Milky Way bar, go, go, GO NOW ANI!! And so he did. Little emotional horny, bratty Ani sliced off the bald man's ultimate weapon... And then... POWAH!!! UNLIMITED POWAH!!! The crazy old man blasted Force lightning powers on the bald man. He died momentarily. Ani's ultimate weapon dropped and well, Ani cried. Yup. That old man stood up and now pronounced Ani to be... Darth Vader.[6] (Totally not true. Details later.)
Palpatine's first orders to his new Sith apprentice were... "Go out and kill Dooku!" "But he's already dead." "Oh, right. Then kill Grievous!" "Obi-Wan got him." "Um... kill that Ahsoka brat?" "Pretty sure she's dead, too." "Oh, good grief. Well, I don't know, go to the Jedi Temple and just kill a bunch of kids or something. Jeez." See what I mean about killing people being his first option? So Anakin killed a bunch of children with his lightsaber, and the whole story ignited a fiery debate about outlawing lightsabers because of all the poor children, but then Obi-Wan and Yoda watched the footage on LiveLeaks, and Obi-Wan decided the time had come to kill Anakin and Palpatine. Obi-Wan wanted to kill Palpatine, but Yoda slapped him and said, "You wimp, you couldn't even beat Dooku. You get Anakin. I'll get the Emperor."
((((edit point))))
So it come to pass and soon he fought his master in the fiery world of Mufasa because the old man threaten to destroy his planet. Anakin lost... He cried, and cried, and cried when Obi-Wan sliced off his legs and one arm. He cried so much that one old confused man had to go comfort him while Obi-Wan left to steal his sexy wife, who later died. Damn, why do the hot ones get killed? But, come on... How could a whiny, emotional tall horny teenager turn into the most badass Sith Man Lord ever, Darth Vader? Well, he didn't. So suck it.
But this was just the cover story for his long history surrounding "the Dark Side" or among friends, the "Rose Side"... Well, he dueled Obi-Wan Kenobi in the fiery world of Mufasa, because he was unwilling to be gay some time before he was roasted by lava. During this duel, Ani finally found his courage and he stopped whining. Unfortunately his whines made him worthy foe (his enemies were rolling on the floor laughing, when he started to speak) and so he had lost his limbs. As for Ani, the whiner, the rumors that he turned into Darth Vader, the Super-Hyper-Ultra-Mega-Sith-Lord are all complete lies. Kenobi left and stole his ultimate weapon, and his sexy wife while the newborn Vader cried. DID I SAY VADER??... I mean Ani.[6]
Skywalker's hidden love was revealed when he tried a new cosmetic change with lava. "Oh Big One" said he loved him, and all, but you know, the guy was all charred... It was a platonic thing, blah, blah, blah. His sexy wife died in Kenobi's arms... and she had two sons... I mean... One Son and One Daughter, that looks more like a man. Eventually the long lost friend of whiny Ani, Darth Darth Binks, went to some remote planet, turned his name to "Anakina" and is now a stripper in some lowlife joint with an amazing show called "Doing the Limbo with Limbs". We don't know what happened next, but there's a good guess he ended up in some studio pretending to be an actor in some "space-opera" movie...[6]
The story about Vader being Anakin are just lies to irritate the Dark Lord... He does wear leather, what was he to expect?[1]
So "Oh Big One" tried his luck with Bail Organa, and Yoda, with bad results. He ended up with a kid on his hands... He decided exile in Tatooine was better... The Booze problem started then... Please read his entry to know what we mean.[3]
This is classified Darthipedia information, please forget all this. You never read this. Yes! We're waving our hands![7]
After the TRANSFORMATIONEdit
Amazingly, Palpy the old guy had the balls to dress up Annie in the real Darth Vader's suit. When he realized his hot, sexy wife Panda Bear was dead, he cried and cried and cried. Finally, Palpy got so pissed off about having to pat the guy on the back every five minutes and say, "There, there, it's OK" that he took the emo hippie to see his now identical twin - the BADASS DARTH VADER!! When Annie realized he wasn't the only Darth Vader out there, he cried even harder. Now the real Darth Vader, being the badass he is, just couldn't take the crying. So, he took out his ultimate weapon and - yay! - tried to kill the brat. But poor Ani was crying so hard, Vader's ultimate weapon short-circuited each time Vader tried to hit him. Finally, the badass got REALLY mad and just Force Choked the little crybaby. This made Ani cry even harder, but not for long. When it was over, Darth Voldemort, Palpy's identical twin who's always with him (even when Palpy was "getting it on" with Diane Vader) was so happy he gave Vader the whole Imperial Fleet!!!!! as a gift. Vader, still mad, took the Fleet and the Death Star and totally PWN PWN PWN PWN PWNed Tatooine and all the other planets around it.
Behind the scenesEdit
- George said so.[8]
- Darth Vader refused to comment on Lucas choice for his past.
- Yes, No Soup-a had relations with this crybaby. It was very wet and loud.
- Rick McCallum liked Lucas saying so, and he supported it.
- Fans hate "little Ani", "Ani" or Anakin, or Chosen One... FACT!
Notes and referencesEdit
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Because George Lucas said so.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Tears
- ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Tears
- ↑ Every Fanboy, Fangirl, Karen Traviss, Mandalorian, the little old lady down the street's dream.
- ↑ That craptastic kiddy show, created by Georgy
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 6.3 Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Tears
- ↑ Reasons why u fail
- ↑ Location of George Lucas Saying So


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Born in Bradford in 1930, Harold and his younger brother Neville, like so many northern activists, began their climbing careers by exploring the local Yorkshire crags and quarries. Inspired by fellow Bradfordian, the legendary Arthur Dolphin, they soon began to look to the mountain areas of the Lake District, North Wales, Scotland and notably Ireland, where the challenges of the hardest routes of the era were accepted and first ascents began to fall.
As a leading light of the loose affiliation of Bradford born climbers known as 'The Bradford Lads' Harold began to rack up the number of first ascents in the Lake District with routes like North Crag Eliminate, Grendal, Anarchist and Sostenuto amongst his classic collection.
Despite mainly climbing within his Bradford circle, there was a friendly rivalry and cooperation with climbers from other clubs like the Manchester Rock and Ice club-of Brown and Whillans fame- and the rival Alpha Club. Activists from all over the north would arrive each weekend- wage slaves on Monday-Free men on Sunday- to share the same dosses, barns and huts in the main climbing arenas. Swopping tales of gnarly first ascents, irate shotgun wielding landowners and hinting at recently discovered unclimbed crags of rich potential!
In the early 1950's, Harold and brother Neville became the first British climbers to explore the great unclimbed cliffs of The Poisoned Glen, in Donegal in the far west of Ireland. At the time, Donegal really was the back of beyond and it took a great deal of planning and effort to just get there. However, their reward was several first ascents on the beetling 1000' cliffs. Their activity piquing the interest of top British climbers like Chris Bonington and Allen Austin who came over and made their own mark on the cliffs.
Towards the end of the fifties- Harold who had trained as a teacher and was by now working as an outdoor instructor in a Peak District outdoor activities centre- took on the authorship of the Fell and Rock Club's first climbing guidebook to Buttermere and the Far Eastern Fells. A daunting undertaking for someone who usually had to hitch-hike between some of the remotest crags in the Lake District in all weathers and often had to solo the climbs due to a lack of willing partners.
Throughout the fifties and sixties, as working class British climbers began to find the ways and means to extend their orbit to the continent, his explorations included trips to the Alps, the USA and Spain. It was while climbing in the Alps with amongst others the legendary Scottish climber Jimmy Marshall, that he met tragedy when a member of the party was killed during an abseil descent and on another occasion, he returned from a successful ascent to discover that Bradford hero and inspiration, Arthur Dolphin had been killed on a neighbouring mountain. His attendance with a handful of fellow English climbers at Dolphin's funeral was movingly described in his autobiography, The Ordinary Route'.
In the early sixties he had secured a position as warden and chief instructor at The Towers Outdoor Pursuits Centre in Capel Curig within the Snowdonia National Park and had married his lifetime partner, Maureen with whom he had worked at an outdoor centre in the High Peak. He was to remain in North Wales for the rest of his life. Despite his demanding full time position, his spare time was still spent climbing and exploring the cliffs of north Wales, with first ascents like Traditional Route and Plato's Cave falling to his advances. During this period he had continued to write articles and essays for magazines and journals. Usually works of rare quality and insight, for within a sport which boasts a disproportionate number of cerebral participants, Harold was a true intellectual, refined scholar and a first rate mind. Someone for whom the Greek classics and works of politics and philosophy were devoured as enthusiastically as the latest climbing guidebooks.
During this period in the late sixties and early seventies, Harold was working on the Climber's Club guidebook to Lliwedd. He became the first guidebook writer to pen guides for both the Fell and Rock and the Climber's Club. His guide published in 1971 was-he liked to boast-the slowest selling guide in guidebook history, taking 30 years to sell out! However, for the uninitiated, the grim, vegetated 1000' Welsh cliff did see it's heyday in the Edwardian era and had long since been considered an esoteric venue. The previous authors, Archer Thomson in 1909 and Menlove Edwards in 1936 had both committed suicide by poisoning. Happily Harold survived 'the curse of Lliwedd' and lived on into old age.
In this period he authored the highly influential' 'Education in the Mountain Centres' A work which emphasised the positive value of teaching young people to appreciate and value the natural environment whilst using its natural resources as an arena for learning outdoor skills and appreciating it's fragile beauty. A message which was remarkably prescient at the time.
By the end of the 70's he had jointly edited 'The Mountain Spirit'- with US climber and academic, Michael Tobias. The work was an anthology of writings based on philosophical and spiritual interpretations which writers throughout the ages had placed on the global mountain environment.
After retiring from his role at The Towers he and Maureen threw themselves into rebuilding their smallholding home high above the market town of Llanrwst. A beautiful elevated abode which looked out over the spectacular Northern Snowdonia mountains. With more free time on his hands, he continued to write-finishing his autobiography 'The Ordinary Route' - published by Ernest Press in 1997- and explore the crags of north Wales. By the mid nineties-and now in his mid sixties- he began a climbing love affair with the sprawling south Snowdonia mountain of Arenig Fawr. A peak which had never had a chronicled climbing history and more interestingly, a mountain which had inspired a unique Edwardian art movement- 'The Arenig School'-led by leading lights, Augustus John and James Dickson Innes.
Over a short period he established around two dozen first ascents on the cliffs of Arenig and continued to establish new routes on previously unclimbed cliffs in remote parts of Snowdonia.
After undergoing a hip operation in his early seventies, his climbing career began to wind down although he still got out into the hills regularly. With the demands of keeping on top of a smallholding becoming more of a thankless chore than pleasure, he and Maureen retired from the country life and settled in the historic north Wales coastal town of Conwy.
A lifelong political anarchist and environmentalist, Harold's attraction to the movements were based on an intellectual affinity to progressive ideals and a natural distaste for top down governance. He had penned a number of articles over the years for political journals based on his beliefs. As the new century progressed, his outdoor essays and articles became rarer and were generally limited to club journals.
Born Bradford 1930- Died Bangor, N Wales 2015.

subset: commoncrawl


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Monday, March 7, 2011
The Lollipop Ladies #15 and Just Add Ink #58......
One of my wonderfully talented blogging friends has just been selected as a new Candy Stripe over at The Lollipop Ladies. Congratulations Trish! To help celebrate I just had to join in for the first time with this weeks challenge, Ba-humbugs, black & white with stripes.
Here's the inspiration photo -
And my card -
I had a bit of trouble with the stripes. If you look REALLY closely you can see that I have embossed some lines /"stripes" underneath the ribbon using my bone folder. Is that pushing it too much??? LOL
I'm also entering this card into this weeks Just Add Ink - Just add Amanda or Danielle challenge. This was purely an accident. It wasn't until I had finished my card that I realised it looked a bit like Danielle's style so I went searching her blog and found this card -
Doesn't it look like a direct CASE? Just goes to show how much we actually keep in the back of our minds without even realising! LOL
Thanks for stopping by!
13 lovely comments:
Love it Sandra! Thats hard case realising afterwards that it was a case of Amandas.. Ive had that too.
Love your card and that bow is gorgeous.
- March 7, 2011 at 4:28 PM
- Jo said...
Perfect. It is very much a 'Danielle' card. Thanks for playing along at JAI this week.
- March 7, 2011 at 4:30 PM
- Debi said...
pretty card Sandra- I love that colour combo x
- March 7, 2011 at 4:38 PM
- *Spring Blossom* said...
Hi Sandra thanks for the mention!! Your card is just beautiful AND a perfect match for DD card.
So glad that you joined in at the Lollipop ladies :)
- March 7, 2011 at 6:00 PM
- Christine Blain said...
WOW Sandra - this is beautiful!!
- March 7, 2011 at 6:16 PM
- Patrice said...
Sandra how lovely are you for supporting Trish in her new venture over at Lollipop Ladies. I'm so excited for her too!
Love your card, and it is the perfect DD CASE you are so right!
I've got lots to catch up on after my absence so will be back a bit later ....
- March 7, 2011 at 6:18 PM
- Bronwyn Eastley said...
- March 7, 2011 at 8:21 PM
- aussiescrapper said...
Wow I love your gorgeous card, simple and elegant, I love how you layered the cardstock, thanks so much for playing with us at Lollipop ladies. Melxx
- March 8, 2011 at 9:24 AM
- Nikki Spencer said...
So elegant CAS and perfect for the Lollipop challenge too...lovely case sandra.
- March 8, 2011 at 1:48 PM
- Rachel Moore said...
Really elegant would make a great wedding card. it is very danielle
- March 9, 2011 at 9:01 PM
- Marcia said...
Very classic, superbly elegant. Thank you for joining in at Lollipop Ladies this fortnight.
- March 12, 2011 at 7:02 PM
- Becci Sundberg said...
Just beautiful. So simple and stunning.
Thanks for playing along with us at The Lollipop Ladies
- March 15, 2011 at 8:07 AM
- Sammi said...
oooh.. this is GORGEOUS!!
Thanks for joining in at The Lollipop Ladies!!
- March 15, 2011 at 9:45 PM


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JK Handicraft Industries Present The Range Of Handmade Bedspread And Quilts. Our Bedspreads Are Made Out Of 100% Cotton And Very Beautifully Embroidered. We Have Several Designs In Bedspread And Quilts.
You may also like: Block Print Rug
ou may also like: Vintage Kutchi Dress
You may also like: Decorative Garden Umbrella
For more information please www.kraftvendor.com


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Playing tracks by
Danny T + OH SNAP!, MATTHEW LE FACE & MATT NASH, JUPITER ACE FT GENEVA LANE, Michael Calfan, Andrew Bennet and more.
Welcome to NITRA GLYSRIN UFG11 #357 for Radio FG. From the outside it looks quite innocuous - I mean what harm could a few tunes blended carefully together under controlled conditions do? Don't ever be fooled by appearances. And be careful how you test this out. Ascanio Sombrero had his fair share of flying glass after dipping a hot wire into his volatile chemical experiment and in this respect, not much has changed since 1846. I can only warn you to handle this with the utmost care as you press play and light the touch paper. When the bad ass beat hammer blow strikes, take cover and prepare for detonation. Even if this supersonic shockwave passes in a flash of light almost too fast to hear, every degree that it causes your temperature to rise makes the dance floor explosion inescapable. Enjoy.


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If you've been playing Skyforge, the first major update since open beta began is now live. Crucible of the Gods is a large update, and not just in content. File size wise my PC is currently in the middle of a 3.85 GB download so get downloading now if you want to play.
In addition to the previously reported additions of raids, anomalies, and other end game content, Crucible of the Gods also introduces a Prestige Scaling system that allows you to play with friends of varying Prestige, a slew of UI updates, Pantheon content, and a major list of bug fixes.
Where most MMORPGs scale higher level players down to lower levels, Skyforge's Prestige Scaling system works the other way around. The lowest level Prestige players in the group will be boosted to higher levels of health and damage while in the group. The group will be confined to "Normal" difficulty content though.
Check out the rather lengthy patch notes here, you'll have time to read them while downloading.
3 Readers CommentedJoin discussion
I am thoroughly disappointed with this game so far. I've given it about 30 hours, but I think I'm done, tbh. Out of all of the action MMOs currently available, this one has the least fluid combat system. I do like the sense of progression within the game, I just can't stand the very clunky combat system, and having quests send me back to repeat the same missions 4-5 over. It isn't likely that a developer would make any huge changes to a game's core mechanics in open beta stage, but I'm hoping this game improves by launch. It has a lot of promise, and it's nice to see a game that doesn't rush you to endgame.
I am loving skyforge, there are some things I would like to see change. But overall the game is good. I haven't played much mmos lately that all just seem to be crap or they take forever to get out in the US, I think it will do better than most mmos out but not super great.


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2017: Aziz Damani
2016: Tornado Bee
2015: Tornado Bee
2014: Tornado Bee
2013: Tornado Bee
2012: Tornado
2011: Patidar Samaj
KAMPALA. In 2016, Tornado Bee became the first club to win four straight championships in the Jazz Safari National Cricket League.
However, their run was ended by Aziz Damani who won the title last year on the first time of asking. Damani was officially crowned as the 2017 champions during the League Awards' ceremony at Lugogo Oval on Sunday.
It only felt a dream come true for Damani Club CEO Siva Koti Reddy who started the team in 2015. "We are very happy," he said after lifting the trophy with captain Ghulam Hunzai on a rather cold evening after their UCA Super Cup match with 2017 Division Two kings Premier.
On the same evening, Kutchi Tigers' Raghvani Shantilal was crowned as Player of Series thanks to his best batsman figures of 554 runs in 13 innings. Each year, the trophy cabinet grown bigger for Damani. Koti's interest grew in the game after their franchise won the 2015 Night Cricket Championship.
They won the 2016 Kishore Pabari Memorial T20 Cup, 2016 Division Two and the 2017 Super Cup, meaning their topflight success is no fluke. Also, the ladies' side Aziz Damani-Masaka SS also lifted the Women's Division Two championship.
But Damani now wants to erase Tornado Bee's records. "Definitely, the target is to win the Championship for both men and women," Siva stated after confirming three new signings.
"Tornado Bee won four in a row but we want to win the next four."
If anything, the signings of budding wicket-keeper Fred Achelam and left-arm seamer Charles Waiswa as well as in-form spinner Henry Ssenyondo from Challengers imply the huge intent by the yellow brigade.
Achelam replaces Arnold Otwani who left for Charity Trust Fund, was the best wicket-keeper last season with 20 dismissals.
KAMPALA. A busy schedule looms for the Cricket Cranes and Uganda Cricket Association (UCA) have opted to take the bull by its horns in preparation for the International Cricket Council (ICC) World Cricket League (WCL) Division IV in Malaysia as well as the Africa Twenty20 Cup in Rwanda.
To get the preparations started, a provisional squad of 17 will tour Qatar and India for invaluable match practice and exposure as they try to execute what they have been doing in training, thanks to UCA's partnership with Cricket Sanjay Farm's Swetal Desai.
On the backdrop of Roger Mukasa and Charles Waiswa's involvement with the Nairobi Provincial Cricket Association (NPCA) Select Team that toured India last year, Desai was overwhelmingly impressed by the pair's talent and pledged to support the development of cricket in Uganda.
UCA chairman Bashir Ansasiira travelled to India for a special meeting with Desai on December 26 last year and the two high caliber personalities fixed the tour for next month (February 17-23).
Team's potential
Cricket Cranes Team Manager Jackson Kavuma, who alongside CEO Justine Ligyalingi and Operations Manager Martin Ondeko finalised the tour arrangements, said the purpose of this tour was not only to test the team's potential.
"We are indebted to Cricket Sanjay Farm and Desai who are going to facilitate a bigger portion of our budget," said Kavuma.
"The purpose of the tour is to also unleash cricketing skills in the remote part of South Gujarat and it will also hopefully open new dimensions for Uganda cricket."
Before heading to India, coach Steve Tikolo and his men will camp in Qatar for a series of T20 and 50-over rubbers against the national side that is littered with classy players from India, Pakistan and Afghanistan.
Batsmen: Roger Mukasa, Hamu Kayondo, Zephaniah Arinaitwe, Simon Ssesaazi, Shahzad Kamal, Lloyd Patternot
All Rounders: Deus Muhumuza, Brian Masaba, Frank Nsubuga, Kenneth Waiswa, Irfan Afridi Riazat Shah
Wicket-Keeper: Fred Achelam
Spinner: Henry Ssenyondo
Pace Bowlers/Seamers: Charles Waiswa, Trevor Bukenya, Bilal Hassan
Reserves: Emmanuel Isaneez, Steven Wabwose.
By INNOCENT NDAWULA
What: National Cricket Academy
When: January 21-31
Venue: Lugogo Cricket Oval
Numbers: 25 participants
KAMPALA. Two days into the first-ever Uganda Cricket Association (UCA) National Boys Cricket Academy, the coaches in charge Steve Tikolo, Franco Otieno and David Obuya are overwhelmed by the talent exhibited thus far.
Lugogo Cricket Oval has been a bee-hive of activity with the 25 players in the academy making the field a beautiful spectacle alongside the men and women's national sides – the Cricket Cranes and Lady Cricket Cranes respectively.
"Every time I see you Ugandans playing cricket, I see a group of talented individuals," said Obuya, who also worked with Baby Cricket Cranes (national boys U-19 side) during the International Cricket Council (ICC) Africa U-19 World Cup Qualifier in Nairobi, Kenya last May.
"We are going to work on several aspects of their game to help them become better. Obviously talent is not their problem. But execution of shots, bowling to plans and better game reading. We want to empower them with a better understanding of the game and etiquette."
UCA Development Officer Henry Okecho highlighted the importance of the training and also revealed that the 'respected' Kenyan tacticians were the most suitable to run this core programme for the association.
"It is a 10-day residential programme with sessions in the morning (9am to 12pm) and afternoon (3 to 6pm)," disclosed Okecho.
"In my opinion it is long overdue as we had planned it for December 2017. There is no doubt that this programme will help us build our stocks for both the U-19 and National teams. Our plan is to set up an U-23 program that would take up most of these players and help prepare them for international competition. This program also acts as a bridge between junior and senior cricket."
Notable players invited for the International Cricket Council (ICC), Bankstown Cricket Club (Australia) and the National Council of Sports (NCS) sponsored academy are national team trainees Steven Wabwose and Frank Akankwasa.
Soroti: Emma Twijukye, Aaron Okwi, Pius Oyena,
Jinja: Eddy Agaba, Steven Wabwose, Calvin Watuwa,
Robinson Obuya, Joel Elelu, Marvin Kitamirike, Pius Oluka. Kampala: Perry Wazombe, Cosmas Kyewuta, Juma Miyaji, Ashraf Ssenkubuge, Frank Akankwasa, Simon Okecho, Gerald Mubiru, Ronald Opio, Ramanthan Ochimi, Fort Portal: Pascal Murungi, Samuel Ntimba, Isaac Ategeka, Alfred Alijuna, Moses Ahura Masaka: Ronald Lutaaya
By INNOCENT NDAWULA & DARREN ALLAN KYEYUNE
With over 30 schools currently taking part in the Girls' Schools Cricket Week Qualifiers, Uganda Cricket Association (UCA) have boosted further their preparations ahead of the tourney.
UCA Development Manager Henry Okecho and Operations Manager Martin Ondeko literally empowered 40 girls' schools by giving them brand new cricket equipment sets to each.
"We encourage you not to misuse the equipment. We want you to use it well to enhance the skills of your students so that they can be able to compete better," said Okecho, who also thanked Bankstown Cricket Club in Australia for continuing to give UCA good equipment for 13 years to-date, during the hand over at Lugogo.
Each of the schools that was represented by their games and cricket masters received four pairs of batting pads, four pairs of batting gloves, six helmets, four thigh guards, one pair of wicket-keeping gloves and one pair of wicket-keeping pads. The best 12 schools from the qualifiers will take part in the Girls Cricket Week from April 29 to May 4.
Kololo, Gayaza High, K. C Budo, Ndejje, Seeta High, Mukono Parents, Kyambogo College,City High, Nalinya Lwantale, Green Hill Academy, St Lawrence Sonde, Masaka, Bwala, Kako, Blessed Sacrament, Exodus, St Gerald, Lords Meade, Jinja SSS, Busoga High, St James, Good Heart, Busedde, Pmm Girls, Honest Hill, Olila High, Halcony High, Soroti Mun, Light SSS, Kyebambe, Nyakasura School, Kasese SSS, Kilembe SSS, Mt Rwenzori, St Theresa, Mt Rwenzori, Bwera SSS, Mutwanyana High, Rock High, Tororo Town College.
By INNOCENT NDAWULA
Mukesh Shukla's 11th hour inclusion onto the coveted list of candidates to take-over as chairman of Uganda Cricket Association (UCA) has had tongues wagging in the fraternity.
An earlier deadline of February 10 had ruled out the former vice chairman but after his club Kampala Institute of Cricket Clubs (KICC) 'nominated' him, the businessman took advantage of the 'non-binding deadline' ahead of the elective assembly due tomorrow at Kati Kati Restaurant, Lugogo.
Shukla's late entry raised the number of contestants to the top job to three with Nile's Bashir 'Badu' Ansasira and Tornado's Paul Luswata Nsibuuka already in the fray whereas Eric Kamara (Wanderers) and incumbent Jeremy Kibuukamusoke (Tornado Bee) are vying for UCA secretary.
After complying with the National Council of Sports (NCS) sports regulations of 2014, UCA CEO Justine Ligyalingi revealed that other posts have been quashed and the mandate will be with the new chairman to appoint working committee heads including but not restricted to Finance, Disciplinary, Marketing and Games.
Outgoing chairman Richard Mwami, despite being eligible for another term, says he will not be standing pushing each camp to seize the occasion.
"It is about bringing fundamental change and not just a change of guards," said Shukla, also the vice chairman of NRM Entrepreneurs League in Kampala Central.
"There is also a basic area of concern which is financial transparency. We also have one ground and yet we should be with five from the strategic planning I did as vice chairman in 2009 under Dr Kato Sebbaale."
But for Alvin Bagaya, who is from Ansasira's camp, it is about giving the power of elections back to the people. "Many things have happened the wrong way lately," said Bagaya.
"But if Badu is elected then it will be all systems go again. His plan is not out this world and if you have read his manifesto, it is very practical. His passion for the game is also unrivalled and the electorate seems to favour our candidate."
Robert Kisubi, who is the campaigning manager of Nsibuuka, however believes many of the younger guys are rushing to takeover and advises that they should wait for their time.
"Our club always votes for the best candidate who is by a coincidence a Tornado this year," said Kisubi.
"He understands the game well, captained Uganda and is from a cricketing family of the Luswatas. From his world as a banker to financial consultant, Nsibuuka's corporate governance will be key. He is his own man, the ambassador our game needs."
Candidates for chairman
Ansasira 'Badu' Bashir - Nile CC,
Paul Luswata Nsibuuka – Tornaddo
Mukesh Shukla – KICC
Candidates for secretary
Eric Kamara – Wanderers
Jeremy Kibuukamusoke – Tornado Bee
* Each of the 8 voting clubs will have a board member
By Innocent Ndawula
Mary Nanderenga Makumbi spotting a black and white dress and looking every bit a ladies representative to the Uganda Cricket Association board was unopposed at the polls held at the Uganda Olympics Committee hostel at Lugogo on 10th February 2017.
Women's cricket that was for long playing a back ground role to the men's game that was regarded with greater favour and approval by the general public has now come to the fore with their having a say at the board that runs cricket affairs in Uganda and Nanderenga will be the force that binds their hopes and dreams into a solid course of action through 2017-2018.
In a game which still refers to women at the awards as best batsman the words of Thomas Bach the IOC president in 2015 ring true "Gender equality cannot be achieved by women alone. To achieve real change, a genuine team effort is needed. Gender equality can only be achieved if men and boys take full responsibility, working side by side with women and girls, to redress the dynamics that hinder progress."; and that was the case at the IOC hostel as the men's representatives turned out in droves with a very significant presence in Mr. William Kibuukamusoke of Tornado Bees Cricket Club.
Nanderenga will do well to learn from Mr. Kibuukamusoke – one of the strongest promoters of the local women's game- together with Mr. Sam Walusimbi her former coach and manager both pillars of the game in Ugandan cricket who understand more than many about the function and use with the least amount of waste and most economy.
Resources will not be abundant as this the case in Ugandan sport but how she chooses to manage alliances and what is available in terms of negotiation and maneuvering through the lean times will ensure a solid performance in office; and if anyone goes by the sturdy attitude and ability to rise from the adversity of a bad innings for her teams in her earlier playing days, her irrepressible attitude to matters should hold her in good standing to deliver.
Quick glimpse at the manifersto;
Who is Mary Nanderenga in Uganda cricket?
Missy as she is fondly known in the local cricketing circles as a player was born in 1984 on August 7th, she was a product of the schools development programme through Kololo S.S which was the postliminary for her excellence at Under 19 and senior women's level of cricket. Under the guidance of celebrated coach Sam Walusimbi at Wanderers Women's Cricket Club, Mary built a gleaming art of wicket keeping and gritty cool headed batting.
She was part of the touring Ugandan side at the East African Women's Championship achieving her highest score 24(37) against Rwanda at the Ngara Sports Club ground, a patient 10(36) to guide the side home against Kenya in the first clash of the round robin tournament at Esatleigh High School to win by 5 wickets but memorably a crucial 12(55) in a low scoring tie against old rivals Kenya in the final of the championship on 20th December 2008 at the Ruaraka Sports Club ground which Uganda won by 9 runs.
Mary was part of the Africa Championship winning national side of January 2011 taking two crucial catches against old rivals Kenya though she struggled through the tournament with and injury to a finger.
PREPARED BY: Alvin Bagaya
Chief Writer for UgCricket.com


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Voices of youth
How UNICEF is upholding young people's right to a voice in the Philippines and around the world
At a workshop in Manila, six groups of young people are working on media projects about children's rights. One group presents a stop motion animation, illustrating the issue of children caught in conflict.
A boy made of clay appears waving against a collage background of sun, trees and clouds. Without warning, a missile shoots in from the right and blows him into pieces. The animation shifts to night time, with toy soldiers firing at each other. Miraculously, the boy reassembles himself and starts waving again. The video ends with the message "If only children were made of clay... but they're not. Uphold children's right to protection."
UNICEF's work, both in the Philippines and internationally, is based on upholding children's rights, including the right to a voice. Every child has the right to a voice in the things that affect them and for their views to be taken seriously. However, many children do not get heard. Their feelings, their views, their worries, their ideas are ignored.
"Unless we listen to children, it is not possible to help them," UNICEF UK Trustee and children's rights consultant Gerison Lansdown comments. "How can we know when children are being abused, whether they have had breakfast, whether they understand their lessons, why they are living on the streets, why they are crying, if we refuse to listen? It is only by understanding more about how children experience the world that we can help to ensure their rights are realised."
This issue is particularly relevant in 2009. Twenty years ago, the world made a set of promises to all children when it adopted the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC). While great progress has been made since then, children's rights are still being denied and much remains to be done. As the champion of the CRC, UNICEF is working to help every child realise their rights, including the right to be heard.
Word on the street
Here in the Philippines, UNICEF has been helping fund a five-year project to uphold young people's right to a voice. Kabataan News Network (KNN) works with around 160 young journalists from ten regions across the Philippines. It produces segments for a regular show, Kabataan X-Press, which explores issues that concern young people, such as teenage prostitution and juvenile justice and also showcases print, radio and video pieces on its website, Kabataannews.com.
Kabataan means 'youth' in Tagalog, the main local language of the Philippines. KNN trains young people to produce news reports using video, radio, print and photography. The young journalists are not just given technical training, they're also taught about children's rights. To mark the 20th anniversary of the CRC this November, KNN asked young people from 32 youth media organisations from across the Philippines to produce pieces in different media, illustrating children's rights.
Ros Padua is Project Coordinator for KNN. "We wanted to focus not just on what children's rights are but on their impact, on what has happened to the Philippines since it signed the Convention" she comments. "Most of the young people on this project are 20 or younger. They were born around the same time as the CRC. A lot of good things have happened in that time but there are still a lot of things that we can improve. So we wanted to ask their help, to determine what more can be done."
Learning in a box
Another of the Manila groups has made a short film about the right to an education. In it, a street child draws a school on a flattened cardboard box. She then assembles the box and crawls into it, followed by a number of other children. The video ends with a call for people to unite to uphold the right to an education.
Guillermo Ocampo, 21, from Baguio has dreamed of being a reporter since he was a child, so the project was a great opportunity for him. "We were given the topic of the right to an education," he said. "While thinking about the story, we had the idea of a child that wants to go to school but doesn't have the resources. When I was a kid, I liked to play with a box and imagine things with it. And the video shows that when one child has created a school with the box, other kids would like to go there too."
"Here in the Philippines, even though there are lots of students starting school, few of them finish," he continues. "In our video, we show that for every 100 children who start Grade One, only 30 will finish high school. So even though we know that every child has the right to go to school, not all of them are getting the chance to finish."
Guillermo says the main thing he learned through the project was that, while many people support the idea of children's rights, they often don't know what they can do to help uphold them. "Even though some people are aware of these rights, they don't know how to act or do something about it," he says. "So most of the pieces in this workshop are public service announcements. Through them, we urge people to take action and let them know where they can join."
It's clear that young people not only have the right to a voice, they have important things to say that adults need to listen to. With UNICEF's support, more young people will have their voices heard as the world marks the 20th anniversary of the Convention on their rights.
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Welcome, welcome to Writing Prompt Wednesday!!
I don't have a cool story for last week's prompt to share so let's just get straight into this week's writing inspiration!
Today's Prompt:
Two people are arguing in an elevator. One of them is holding a bag of oranges.
Write about why the bag of oranges is significant.
My story:
"Did you buy the biggest bag of oranges they had?"
"Are you seriously mad at me right now because I bought a bag of oranges?"
I turned and faced Jeremy for the first time since we had gotten on the elevator. He was so beautiful with his shaggy hair mussed from the wind outside and his three-day old stubble on his square jaw. It hurt to look him in his eyes, though. It wasn't about the oranges. It was about who he bought the oranges for. Marguerite. Marguerite Beauchamp was our new neighbor from across the hall. A gorgeous, long-legged French girl with long locks of chestnut colored hair that never seemed to move, as if it were capable of defying all laws of motion. Marguerite was sick with a cold and had mentioned to us as we were standing behind her, waiting to dump our garbage down the shoot, that she really wanted a glass of freshly-squeezed orange juice. Three hours later, my fiance is holding a bag of oranges so big that I wondered if he had stolen them from the zoo. There was no way that he purchased this enormous bag at Wal-Mart because he had a craving for orange juice. He had a craving for Marguerite Beauchamp......
Okay, there's my story for the week. Let's see what you guys come up with! Leave me your story in the comments or email me (firstname.lastname@example.com)! Also, send me ideas for writing prompts! You just might get your story or your idea featured next week!


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Every once and a while I get a request for a blog topic. Today I am indulging myself to fulfill a recent request. One of my regulars at Mile High Run Club, (very strong athlete and badass lady!), requested I write about what it's like to coach and pace my own roster, teach full time at the studio, and still get in my own training and goals. While at first I thought this might be an unrelatable but perhaps interesting topic, the more I thought about it the more relatable it seemed. So many of my athletes juggle very long hours at work, private lives that sometimes involve families, the stress and fast-pace pressure of living in NYC, while tackling their own goals. So while my life/career is probably very different from yours, perhaps some tricks and priorities in my life will help you figure out out to better balance your journey with running.
Let me start by saying I am not a professional athlete. I have never been one. So my drive in my own training has never been fueled by a sponsor, collegiate team, pro team, etc. The only pressure or goals I have are those I've put on myself. My guess is that's how most runners operate – self-motivated and training and racing because they love this sport!
To say getting in my training is challenging would be an understatement. Like many folks, my line of work has me on my feet all the time! I am standing, walking or running for anywhere from 4-10 hours per day. This makes "recovery" a tough thing. While there are lots of benefits to not sitting on one's bum all day, I have to be mindful about wearing supportive shoes as much as possible, and sitting whenever given the opportunity – the train, between classes, whenever I can. If you are a teacher, nurse, doctor, or in the restaurant or film/tv industry, you probably live on your feet too!
Then there's my hours – fitness industry folks work some of the hardest hours out there. We coach before most people go to work (hello, 4am wakeup!), and after folks are finished with work (I've been known many times to get home for dinner around 10pm), and it's truly a 7-day a week business. It's a job that can not only take over, but completely control your life. You only get time off when you protect a day and fight to protect it, and even then I am usually responding to emails, texts and calls from my private clients. So sleep, meals and training are a challenge.
The awesome thing about coaching full time is that I am constantly inspired and motivated by the people I am working with almost every hour of every day! My fellow coaches, team mates, clients – I have a ton of inspiration around me! So I rarely have the opportunity to lose focus when I am training. That's a huge asset.
I was asked how I get my miles, goals and races accomplished – especially when clocking miles paces my own athletes. This is a tough one. Really tough. Despite my best abilities, I'm a human and not a machine – so I need to be careful and can only clock so many miles per day. There have been years where I opted to train and race for ultras, partly because it was of interest, but mostly because it jelled best with all the pacing I had on my plate. Back-to-back 20-mile days are only beneficial for ultra marathoners. However, this year I have really gotten back to some speedier and more ambitious goals for myself, and so I have decided to be more protective of my running time. It means not being everything to everyone. Learning to say no. And thinking of my own health. It's a balance.
I have learned to always prepare and pack food for the day. I usually have fruit or veggies in my bag, along with some trail mix. I always have a water bottle with me. This minimizes the chance of dehydration or going hours without fuel. I will sometimes try to go to bed really early if I am wiped out – even if it means skipping social events. I write my training down in my calendar with everything else that day and hold it to the same level of importance as work, appointments and errands. I am rarely in shoes that aren't my Mizunos. My feet are my career. I need them healthy and happy. I also replace my shoes pretty darn frequently. It's worth it. If a goal race is worth it, I will sometimes sacrifice work opportunities or sleep to get in my time at the gym or park. I never want to be resentful of my work, or feel like I didn't put in the training necessary for doing my best on race day. Hopefully as you juggle your plate, you can find tricks that work for you.


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Most comment on the acquisition of Virgin Media by Liberty Global has focused on the obvious: "It will create the world's biggest cable operator." "Richard Branson will get a nice lump sum." "Malone and Murdoch can slug it out in a new market." "To be successful Liberty will have to sell more bundles and upsell more TV and broadband." Ho hum…
The question all the other players in the UK's pay-TV, broadband and mobile markets need an answer to though, is will the new company behave differently? How will it change as a competitor?
To understand this, it is worth looking at the profile and personality of the Liberty Global business. What sort of company is it now? How does it operate? What are the capabilities of the new business?
Many of the clues for what the UK market can expect are evident in the merger presentation. Virgin Media has been better than Liberty Global at selling bundles – and especially at selling mobile services. Virgin was perceptive in getting in as an MVNO early and striking a good deal with its network operator partner. Early subscriber acquisition (based on innovative pricing) was a huge factor in its success. Liberty's MVNO business in Europe, meanwhile, is much less well-developed. Virgin Media has also been better at selling to business customers, generating 16% of revenues from business customers, compared with Liberty Global's 6%.
By buying Virgin Media, Liberty Global can leverage the UK provider's experience to drive up the revenue it is earning from its continental European assets. And that's why it makes sense to put the HQ in the UK too, as the staff with that critical expertise are all nearby.
Virgin Media does not get any of those benefits. What it might get is improved network availability in European markets, and thereby the potential to enhance the solutions and commercial offers it can make to UK companies with a strong European presence.
The scale of the new Liberty Global group should enable it to secure better equipment deals with suppliers. Its scale is not game changing; but it will help the bottom line.
Don't expect to see a vast amount of new investment in UK networks though. In the merger presentation it was pointed out that Virgin Media was moving into a less capex intensive phase. And the proportion of revenue Liberty Global has been spending on capex is lower than the proportion spent by Virgin Media. And the group is focusing on driving up operating cash flow – that is not compatible with a large scale capital spending spree.
Liberty has additionally gone on record as saying it does not plan to go up against BSkyB in terms of premium content creation – which again would be an expensive activity.
Finally, Liberty Global cites as a benefit the rising prices for broadband in the UK - so there is no obvious appeal in starting a price war.
Virgin Media looks a stronger competitor for BT, BSkyB, Telefonica O2 and the other big UK telecoms operators, but it will still need to buy the same wholesale services, and it does not look like its retail strategy will change too much.
The real benefit for Virgin Media shareholders is a good acquisition price – one that comes at a substantial premium to stock market valuations at the time the deal was announced.
So what does the Liberty acquisition of Virgin Media mean for UK telecom? Not much.


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What To Consider When Purchasing A Cable Modem
It is advisable to purchase a cable modem and save a lot of dollars over the years. Some companies may make you believe it is worth to rent their modems. Unfortunately, they are just interested to take your money. You should never allow them to do so. It is advisable to purchase your cable modem router combo and take control of your internet. Moreover, you will be saving some money in the process.
Why buy a modem?
Your internet provider will come to your home and set everything, including a router and modem. What is the benefit of purchasing your own? In any case, modem rental is not very expensive – just for $10 per month. Is there a great deal? What you should note that; it is possible to get a good modem for about $100. Thus, if you are renting, it does not make any economic sense. Other than saving money, you will be getting much out of the internet connection. The provider can take advantage of speeds they offer.
What to consider when purchasing a modem
It is advisable to purchase your own modem. The following are some things to consider when buying a new modem online:
Compatibility with the cable provider
Nearly all modems will work with any cable provider; there are some exceptions. The majority of cable internet providers have pages that provide a list of modems which work with their services. Remember that not every provider makes it very easy to find such information. If you cannot, you should carry out an online search and check forums.
Fast enough
DOCSIS is the standard used by internet cable firms to send information. If you purchase a modem which is DOCSIS 3.0 compatible, you are bound to get great performance. An average modem is likely to provide download speeds of about 340 Mbps and the upload speeds of 120 Mbps. This means that higher-end modems provide great download speeds.
Check ethernet port speed
It is possible you are running a router separately from the modem. It does not matter how fast the router is, if you have got a slow ethernet port, then you are going to slow down your connection. To have an internet connection to the computer, its signal should travel from the cable lines through the modem to the router and then to your computer or mobile devices.
Modem/router combo
It is advisable to purchase a modem router combo that serves both purposes just from a single box. The good thing about this combo is that it is easy to setup, less clutter, and few wires involved.


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Class of 2009 – Loughead Brothers
The biographical information below was compiled by Alan Renga, Assistant Archivist, for the 2009 International Hall of Fame Gala. For more information on the Museum's Library and Archives, click here.
They were the founders of one of the most successful American aerospace companies, which produced some of the most innovative and groundbreaking aircraft the world has seen. Presenting the Loughead brothers!
The Lockheed story begins with the Loughead brothers, Allan, Malcolm and Victor, who all became fascinated with aviation after witnessing several glider demonstrations while growing up in San Francisco. The lesser known Victor (who was actually a half brother) was educated as an engineer and published two early technical works on aviation by 1910. Victor's interest in aviation compelled Allan to learn how to fly. Malcolm had already gained fame for developing a reliable hydraulic automotive brake. Malcolm and Allan set up the Alco Hydro-Aeroplane Company in San Francisco and built their Model G, which was an original design, but commercially unsuccessful. For the next two years the brothers had a few adventures, from gold prospecting to fighting in the Mexican Revolution. During the Panama-Pacific International Exposition in San Francisco they charged the crowds for flights in their Model G and made enough money to start the Loughead Aircraft Manufacturing Company in 1916 which was located in Santa Barbara.
Their first project in Santa Barbara would be very ambitious: the F-1, the world's largest sea plane which could carry 10 passengers. The brothers hired Jack Northrop (a fellow SDASM Hall of Fame honoree), a 20-year-old draftsman, to work on the project. The F-1 finally flew in 1918 and the brothers soon received a request to build flying boats for the Navy. After World War I, the company devoted its energies to the S-1, a single-seat biplane for civilian use that never was economically successful. Financially strained, Loughead Aircraft closed in 1921.
Malcolm Loughead quit the aviation industry, moved to Detroit and became successful with a hydraulic-brake system he developed for cars. Tired of his name being mispronounced "Log-head," Malcolm officially changed the spelling to Lockheed to match its pronunciation. He called his new company the Lockheed Hydraulic Brake Company. In the meantime, Allan became a real estate salesman until 1926 when he reunited with Jack Northrop and started the Lockheed Aircraft Corporation- specifically incorporating the "Lockheed" spelling to associate themselves with Malcolm's successful brake company. Their first aircraft was Lockheed Vega, an incredibly successful high-speed monoplane. With a range of one thousand miles, a cruising speed of 185 miles per hour and capacity for six people, the Vega quickly became a popular choice for many of the world's top aviators, including Amelia Earhart and Wiley Post.
Jack Northrop left Lockheed in 1928 to start his own successful aircraft business and in 1929 Lockheed was sold to the Detroit Aircraft Corporation and Allan Loughead resigned from the company. Like his brother, he would legally changed his name to Allan Lockheed in 1934. He went on to form two other aircraft manufacturing companies in the 1930s. Both were unsuccessful. After WWII, he continued his career as a real estate salesman while occasionally serving as an aviation consultant. His love of flying never diminished, though, and Allan Lockheed kept an informal relationship with the Lockheed Air Corporation until his death in 1969.
Even though the Brothers were no longer directly involved in Lockheed, the company would thrive the next few decades, Lockheed would produce such famous airplanes as the Electra, the P-38, L049 Constellation and the L-1011 Tristar. In 1995 Lockheed merged with merged with Martin Marietta to form Lockheed Martin.
If it wasn't for the Loughead Brothers early interest in aviation and their willingness to follow through on their dreams, Lockheed aircraft never would have come into existence. If this were the case, aerospace history would be much different and some of the most innovative and significant aircraft in history never would have been built. For their contributions to aviation technology, the San Diego Air & Space Museum takes great pleasure inducting the Loughead Brothers into its International Aerospace Hall of Fame.


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* DriveTime is not able to make safety recall repairs, so vehicles may be subject to open recalls. Visit http://www.safercar.gov/ for more information about recalls.


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SYRACUSE — Last week, Brent Axe revealed that today would be his final day hosting his afternoon sports talk show, On the Block, on The Score 1260 (WSKO). Originally mum about his plans, Axe has revealed he has accepted a new position as "Community Sports Engagement Specialist" with syracuse.com.
Axe has been blogging about sports on syracuse.com since 2007, before he joined his current radio station in 2008. Today, he used that blog as the platform to announce his promotion to the full-time position with the Syracuse Media Group, the new name of the parent organization that's currently restructuring the way things are done behind the scenes at syracuse.com and the Post-Standard.
Here's how Axe explained his new title:
What is a "community sports engagement specialist?"
Well, that's the fun part.
We are all going to find out together.
Syracuse.com has bascially given me the digital version of a blank slate.
In the post, Axe goes on to explain he'll continue to write his blog, including recaps of SU football and basketball games. But he'll also be engaging more with readers in the comment section below those articles, and he'll be producing podcasts, videos, chat sessions and any other kind of future "interactive" technology we haven't heard about yet.
"That said, radio is in my blood," Axe continued. "It always will be. I wasn't unhappy in the radio business. I may even return one day down the road. But once the chance to do this came about, I just couldn't say no. I couldn't be afraid to try something as different, challenging, and exciting as I think this new gig will be."
Axe's final show on The Score 1260 will be today, in the usual timeslot 2-6pm. The program is also simulcast online at thescore1260.com and on the Time Warner Cable Sports Channel.
When Axe first announced his plans to leave radio last week, Cumulus Media Operations Manager Tom Mitchell told CNYRadio.com that he intends to replace Axe with another local host, but no decisions have been made yet.
Although The Score 1260 is affiliated with Yahoo! Sports Network, and will be switching to CBS Sports Radio Network in 2013, the station overrides the network to provide local programming weekdays from 10am until 6pm, along with some additional hours of local programming on weekends. The station also carries live coverage of various local teams, including the AHL's Syracuse Crunch and minor league baseball's Syracuse Chiefs.


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Norma Ann Thomas Anderson, age 76 of Dickson, TN died on December 10, 2015 at NHC in Dickson. Visitation will be held on Sunday, December 13, 2015 from 4-8pm. A funeral service is scheduled for Monday, December 14, 2015 at 11am at the Taylor Funeral Home. Place of rest will be in the Parker-Fowlkes Cemetery.
She was born August 7, 1939 in Dickson County, TN. She was a daughter of the late Paul Hully Thomas and Lillian Lucille Lunn Thomas. She worked as an LPN at Baptist Hospital in Nashville, TN for over 25 years. She attended services at the Fairview Baptist Church. In addition to her parents, she is preceded in death by her brother, John Edward Thomas.
Mrs. Anderson is survived by her husband of more than 60 years, James Sol Anderson of Dickson, TN; sons, Tim (Jandra) Anderson of Dickson, and Freddy (Connie Kramer) Anderson of Nashville; daughter, Angie (George) Rawlins of Clarksville; grandchildren, Emily Peach, Eric Anderson, Adam Kimbro, Kayla Partin, Tia Anderson, Marcus Anderson; great grandchildren, Layla Peach, Dillon Peach, Owen Anderson, Evan Anderson.
Taylor Funeral Home, Inc. has endeavored to provide the most up-to-date information for the families we serve. We trust that you will find the information listed on this website to be of value to you.


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Anaheim Public Utilities is extending underground electrical circuits to provide additional capacity to Central and South Anaheim for improved reliability. This project consists of installing 6.6 miles of underground power lines (3.25 miles of 69KV and 3.35 miles of 12KV) which also provides much needed operational flexibility of the electric system.
December 2017 – Construction Starts
March 2019 – Construction Complete
Jason Rilloraza, email@example.com


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- Home
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Our Launch Internship Program takes a step-by-step approach to helping you build the foundation for your career. We're committed to developing the skills and technical competencies that will contribute most to your professional advancement.
First, you'll attend training sessions that introduce you to our business, our culture and our advanced technology and tools. You'll learn more about your role as a Launch intern and focus on developing your skills and competencies.
After your training, you'll work on projects with a variety of teams to gain insight into the operations of a global organization. You'll also learn about our different service lines and how they fit in our structure.
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Eligible applicants are from underrepresented groups in the profession and are accounting and/or related business majors who are two or more years from final graduation. Contact your college placement or career service office to find out when EY is scheduled to interview on your campus. And get the inside scoop on the interview process and tips for success at Interview Insider.


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500 BLOCK OF CR 3680 – A woman came home and found her dog dead. She suspected foul play.
100 BLOCK OF DEER FIELD – Estranged spouses got into an argument.
300 BLOCK OF CR 1160 – A man said he is being harassed by animal control.
200 BLOCK OF LYNCH ROAD – A woman reported that pills were missing from a medicine bottle.


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can life can any better than piña colada beside the ocean? Best of all, great photos to scrap :)
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
A new layout and a new team!
can life can any better than piña colada beside the ocean? Best of all, great photos to scrap :)
10 comments:
Well done on the 2 Crafty team.. and this layout is stunning!ReplyDelete
Gosh this is beautiful.....so sort of soft, flowing and romantic [with a touch of spice for those there dancin' ladies!!!!].....biggest of congrats on the 2Crafty gig....suits you down to the ground.....& glad you enjoyed my short bokeh video. Bet you take the idea & do something smashing with it!!!! Course, that could be seen as a challenge, too;)ReplyDelete
Gorgeous layout like always!ReplyDelete
Brilliant as always Lisa! I am glad you had a great time and congratulations on the 2Crafty DT! Can't wait to see how you will play with the chippies!ReplyDelete
Wow Lisa, so soft and you always manage to make your soft colors not looking too sweat! great layout!ReplyDelete
Beautiful Lisa! Congratulations on your 2 Crafty design team position.ReplyDelete
Очень классная страничка!!! Столько деталек. очень интересно смотреть!!! мне нравится цветовая палитра!!! здорово!ReplyDelete
Beautiful! Love the colouring. Congratulations on the new position. Perfect match for you. Am looking forward to seeing more of your divine creations as a member of the DT.:)ReplyDelete
Perfect fit for you! LOVE this page! The colors are magical!ReplyDelete