text:
Monday, September 20, 2010
One of our own needs us. I have given her some advice on an email, but she would like very much YOUR feedback, and to know if you guys have done such things. (We all have right!!). My main message to her is 'what's done is done,' and that this man pushed her to such a place of pain that she was not responsible for her actions. She became as bad as him (we all do) and at the end of the day she actually did the wife a favour by telling her. My concern is that the wife is not genuine though, and is not really divorcing him at all. Please help her by leaving some comments of encouragement below, as only you all can.
"Hello my fellow sisters -- I am in a dilemma over something I've done, and I would really appreciate your honest feedback.
After a year and a half, I anonymously contacted the soon-to-be-ex-wife of my MM (using an old email address) and told her that he was having an affair and that she should "hire an investigator because he may be bi-sexual too" (this I suspect based on insecurities he had revealed to me about himself). The wife wrote me back that "we are already divorcing" and that she "has never trusted him but couldn't prove anything" and then asked me to help her with the divorce by sending her proof. She promised to keep my identity confidential. I told her I'd think about it, and never contacted her again. She never contacted me again either.
My dilemma is this: I knew contacting her was wrong and was "bad karma" but I didn't care at the time. I just HAD to know if they were really divorcing (like he told me) and what the story was. Now that I know, I do not feel any better. I feel HORRIBLE. I am a worse betrayer than he ever was. I betrayed his "very personal insecurities" that he disclosed to me (about his "issues as a man"). And I am ashamed to say that I am more concerned about the bad karma than about any damage I did to him. Or her.
Also, what if he finds out it was me? I think I used that email with him at one time. I am not a bad person, I really am a good person, which is why I can't understand why I couldn't stop myself from doing what I did. Am I terrible? Should I tell him what I did? There's no excuse for doing that, in my opinion. Please tell me your opinions, and if you've ever felt this way or did this too.
Thank you, Sisters.
20 comments:
Can I ask "why did you feel the need to contact his ex"? Did he do something to you to betray you??? If he was indeed divorcing her, why would you risk revealing yourself??
Anyone who is involved with a MM knows that the majority of them will lie and say " yeah my wife and are divorcing" and the majority knows that is usually just BS.....however in your case it proved to be true....
Are you and MM still together? If so then maybe after the divorce is final then I would come clean to him. If you not together then IMO there is no reason to reveal what you did........don't beat yourself on what you did.....just try and stay away from MM in the future it will save a lot of heartache....
- September 20, 2010 at 3:37 AM
I would not feel bad for snooping----look what he is doing to you! He is lying to you, lying to his wife, and I don't blame you for wanting to find out the truth, if there is any such thing in an affair.
I would just let it go. And if you can, please walk away. Good luck to you!
- September 20, 2010 at 3:53 AM
when in doubt, don't. What good would telling him do anyway ? Don't worry about the Karma Train over this. If he finds out it was you, what is the worst that could happen? He leaves you? That would be his loss and besides he is the one dest...ined to get on the Karma Train. Don't send the wife any proof. That is her job. You don't owe her and aren't working for her. Schedule a self-indulgent middle of the week lunch, cocktails and shoe shopping date with some girlfriends and forget about it. What's done is done.
- September 20, 2010 at 4:05 AM
Oh Baby Girl...We all get so caught up in this thing called life. What's Right What"s Wrong. Ask 20 people the very same question and there opinions will all differ.
So what i send you is unconditional love as a human being..Oh and one question Why are you so afraid of Karma when all i see is it showing you the way...?
P.S My opinion on sharing with any other being is to expect whatsoever passes from my lips to there ears is also being herd by the universe infinite..
Big Hugs
- September 20, 2010 at 4:46 AM
My experience has been that they don't leave the "comfort" of their relationship (marriage). They have found a way to co-exist and have no reason to change.
Your decision to spill the truth was unfortunately harder on you than anyone.She may or may not have known.He sure as hell felt no guilt over his time with you.
In the end,you need to look after you.No one else is going to do it.Karma pays up and down (meaning we're never sure if we're paying for a past life or paving the road for the next one) so move on.I agree "whats done is done". This is a lesson learned (however you look at it) and know that you still have all the choices you will ever want moving forward.
Much love and support from Canada.
- September 20, 2010 at 7:38 AM
What is done is done. I often had the urge to come clean to the wife to get an idea of how things really were so I understand that. It seems as though you are still with the MM. You need to look out for you. Would telling him what you did do anything for you? My guess is not. It seems that you are beating yourself up where you did what you thought was right. I wouldn't send her proof, in the end you would more than likely end up the one that is ostracized not the MM.
Unfortunately there are no rights or wrongs in such a situation. Whatever you decide, whether to tell him or not, whether to stay with him or not, I wish you peace.
- September 22, 2010 at 11:38 AM
In response to my post...Thank-you, Ladies, for all your good thoughts and advice. I know I shouldn't beat myself up. (I guess I'm a masochist...why else would I get involved with an MM, right?) It helps to read your words of support. I need to be kinder to myself, and I will strive to be from now on. Sarah, thank-you for all your help, both on an individual basis, and by sharing your book and this blog. Being the "other woman" is a lonely way to live life, and this network you've provided us, is a gift. I will stay in touch with this blog for on-going support and look forward to sharing my support as well.
Just so you all know, since you were wondering...my MM and I do not see each other anymore, but he still calls and texts to "Say Hi" and "wish me a good week." He's probably trying to keep his foot in the door, I know, but I can't bring myself to cut it off completely (and neither can he, obviously). I'm hoping that as my self-esteem improves and my spirituality grows (I'm reading a lot of books on that), that the situation will resolve on its own, with me taking the higher road from now on. I hate to be mean to anyone, even him.
Thanks again, Everyone! You've helped me! XO E.
- September 24, 2010 at 9:27 AM
The amount of lying in this triad sounds pretty disgusting. This does not sound positive for anyone involved. I'm all for finding healthy relationships in life but this sounds like three times the opposite. Get out, give up the revenge game, and try again with a better fit.
- Deep V.
- September 25, 2010 at 1:30 AM
If you really want to be MARRIED then you don't qualify to be a MISTRESS. Why should a relationship be all about if or if not he (or she) gets a divorce. In the grand tradition of mistressing being in a shadow marriage is the key. People need to ask themselves if they are really mistresses or just having an affair.
- September 25, 2010 at 11:57 AM
Ladies...after all my thank-yous, (and I meant every one) and all my good intentions, I committed the final, lowest act. I am sorry, but my anger and hurt override all feelings of guilt. This bastard was supposed to call me (since we still "keep in touch as friends") on Friday. He didn't. He texted me this morning and told me that he was "golfing with his brothers" who happen to live not far away from me. He wasn't. He was golfing with an old girlfriend from 20 years ago (I found out). I've absolutely had it. I could not stand it another minute--that he was getting away with this. His wife is hard enough. Another girlfriend? That's too much. I contacted both the wife AND the girlfriend and sent them a hotel reservation and an email he sent me from last year' where he asked me to meet him out of town. Ladies...I know I'm going to get your scorn and I deserve it. But I am so angry, there are no words. And it's because THIS IS MY OWN FAULT!! I knew he was a rat in the beginning. Why did I allow it to contiinue? I am a mean person for doing what I did. But in a way, I feel that at least the truth is out. If I just made a heap of trouble for myself, I guess I'll have to deal with it. But I could not stand the thought of him getting away with it any longer.
- September 26, 2010 at 2:13 PM
Well, I heard back from the "new/old girlfriend" and she was non-plussed about what I had to say about him. She said they were "just friends" and she intends it to stay that way. She said she's "sorry for my hurt" and hopefully I can find some "resolution" and "lose my resentment." I am glad that I told the truth of things, but it always feels like there's one more thing to say or one more letter to write. I just want to chalk this whole thing up to a very painful (and possibly, very humiliating) lesson and forget about it. How can I do that? Any words of advice? How can I FINALLY let go without thinking about what may come next?
- September 27, 2010 at 3:10 AM
Ladies, in your experience, does the MM usually have more than one mistress or "close female friend" at a time? This "new/old girlfriend" that I emailed yesterday (see previous note) was very supportive of him and said I was "resentful." She said they were "very close friends" and I'm just wondering if he could be playing her too and still have others as well.
- September 27, 2010 at 4:07 AM
E. They can certainly juggle many women at one time. They have no respect for women, so no guilt. If one woman rejects them they just replace her with another. THEY DO NOT like being alone. They HAVE to be the star of the show.
They lie to everyone in order to keep the peace, get a piece AND keep everyone quiet.
- September 27, 2010 at 12:15 PM
Thanks, Raven. I hope the "new/old girlfriend" who called me "resentful" knows what it feels like too, someday.
Sarah...I've deleted my Facebook account. Since the MM, his wife, and his "new/old girlfriend" are also on there, it's too tempting and painful to keep snooping to see what he's up to. I'll never move on that way. I also blocked his phone number and email, just in case he ever tries to contact me again (which I doubt...he's got a "new" one now). Anyway, locking the doors is the only way I can move on. I'll keep in touch with you and the Sisters thru this blog. Thanks for everything!!!
- September 28, 2010 at 8:43 AM
My best friend just advised me to find a lawyer. She said that since I contacted the wife and new girlfriend and sent them both emails, that I could be prosecuted or at least dragged into court during their divorce hearing/trial. I'm shaking and ready to cry. What have I done...just for a brief moment of sweet revenge?
- September 28, 2010 at 11:20 AM
Sister E,
All you have done is tell the truth. You were in a position of extreme pain and hurt which manifests itself as anger of course. You have set yourself free and you have actually set his wife free to live in the truth, and who cares about the other girl anyway, whatever the truth about her/him is.
I wouldnt worry about the lawyer part hun. That looks like you are making all this more important than it is to you.... She already told you that she was already divorcing him tough, so its not 'your fault' anyway.
This man chose to break his vows and chose to have an affair with you. Yes you could have said no, we all could, but it turned into something bigger than you. It always does.
Hopefully you will not get involved with any MMs ever again. A lot of your sisters - and of course me- will never either. I mean, who really wants to be THAT unhappy eh!!
Keep in contact with us please, and try to look after YOU now ok
Sarah J x
- September 29, 2010 at 5:40 PM
I'm surprised that the wife took you at your word and didn't ignore your emails and pretend she had never read them or write you off as a nutjob who was lying about her husband.
When I was preparing to end my affair, out of self-preservation (I was worried he would try to get me fired) I tried to "out" my MM by emailing and texting people close to him, but to this day, it appears to have been a waste of time. Whatever his in-laws may have been whispering among themselves when he wasn't there, they never even told him that there were some odd rumors going around about his activities. This shows me what a dysfunctional system his wife grew up in and how she learned to ignore anything remotely unpleasant. So, I don't believe that if I had stood outside her house with a sign that said "HELLO KATHY, I'VE BEEN SLEEPING WITH YOUR HUSBAND FOR THREE YEARS. HAVE A NICE DAY" she would have acknowledged that it had occurred.
At least the two of them aren't ruining anyone else's lives anymore They deserve each other.
- November 20, 2010 at 6:46 PM
Hi everyone. I was involved with a married man for 16 years.. It was like we were married but he never stayed over, always went home to his wife. We went overseas together, away with our friends together, his friends would ring him at my house never his because we were a couple. I never asked him to leave his wife and he always said he wouldn't, although we did talk about me buying a new house or winning the lottery and buying a new house and him moving in. He gave me a birthday dinner with 6 of our friends, he talked to one of them about an upcoming weekend away we were having and told him to book the house, the next day he left my house at 11pm and apparently went to a cafe with his mates - since found out it was his new girlfriend. He never came back. I rang him and he said he was going to talk to me and Isaid what you dont want to be with me anymore? He said I would get over it! He left me for a very very large and unattractive girl 16 years his junior. He tells everyone he is so happy and they are having sex in the back of his car because she lives athome with her parents. He STAYS over at her house when her parents are away and they go away nearly every weekend so that they have a bed to have sex in. He says he is in love with her and he is so damn happy. I am finding it very hard to get over him. I feel devastated betrayed humiliated etc etc etc. He will be 60 in feb 2011. She is 43. I want him to hurt. I want my revenge. He keeps his home life and wife very secret and doesnt allow anyone or anything to penetrate it. He and his wife sleep inthe same bed but do not have sex. He is the king of liars. How do i get back athim. Why is he so damn happy, Is it ok to let his wife know? He is getting engaged to his new girlfriend and he has just slotted her into my life and friends. I have not had any contact with him for 3months. Please tell me why ishe so damn happy and smug and how I can get back at him?
- January 15, 2011 at 5:39 AM
Dear Betrayed
See this as a lucky ESCAPE. Now you don't have to live this life any longer, a life that steals you of your life. Let the other woman choose to if she wants to, but you are better than that. Where do you live, Betrayed, are you in the States?
Keep the faith and stay strong.
Sarah x
- January 22, 2011 at 4:38 AM
Hello Betrayed,
Trust me, I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL!!!
I DID get what I felt was "just revenge" (I emailed his wife and sent her some incriminating emails and also emailed his new girlfriend) and although I wouldn't do things differently now, (because I do feel that he needed to be exposed for the dirtbag that he is), your feelings of anger and hate will not magically disppear with any actions of revenge you take. I still felt the same anger after I did those things, and even more, and did not feel "magically better." It's now 4 months since it all went down, and I'm slowly but steadily getting better. I know beyond any doubt that I am better off without him! In the end, if you continue to hold on to hateful feelings, you will suffer, not him. He will just move on to another poor woman, etc. etc. My regret from my situation (my story is the one that started this thread) is that I allowed my self-esteem to get so low that I settled for him in the first place. I sensed from the very beginning, what he was, and chose to ignore it. You do not have to do anything TO him. Life will take care of him. He will never find happiness and contentment. He will always go from woman to woman, unsatisfied. Sarah is right, at least you are out of it now. He is someone else's problem. Shed him like soiled clothes and step into the sunlight. Trust that Life has better waiting for you, because She does!
God Bless.
Sister E. XO
- January 29, 2011 at 11:13 AM


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Saturday, August 27, 2011
Dishes for all tastes
4 comments:
- Ms. Becky said...
ooh Ella. that plate of food looks so delicious. I want some cloudberry jam. I've never heard of it. but the name alone makes me want it! what a beautiful name for a berry. and a jam. and it's such a gorgeous color too. your blog is one of my favorites because I'm introduced to these lovely things -food, flowers, traditions - that are unfamiliar to me yet very interesting. happy day to you Ella.
- August 27, 2011 at 7:15 PM
- JMW said...
What a wonderful festival to come upon while riding your bike! The food looks delicious, especially the Camembert with cloudberry jam!
- August 29, 2011 at 11:18 AM
Thank you for reminding me at the cloudberry. I searched this berry in the net, because I didn't know it. You have already written about these berries in your blog. I found an article in german on Wikipedia. It sounds interesting. Perhaps I'll try to cultivate one in my garden if I get some seeds. I'll ask a friend in Finnland for the seeds...
- August 30, 2011 at 4:19 AM
- Deidra said...
I love that little anecdote about the woman who now has a way to visit her friends. There is such symbolism in the building of a bridge!
- September 4, 2011 at 2:40 PM


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For information on current road closures, please visit the Tasmania Police website: http://www.police.tas.gov.au/community-alerts/


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Friday: Saw Think Like A Man… which was one of the best romantic comedies I've seen in awhile. Kevin Hart is hilarious! Kept me laughing from beginning to end!
Saturday: Shopping, Grace's Chinese Take-out, and the beginning of our April showers.
Sunday: Went to the early morning church service. Watched Mission Impossible 3: Ghost Protocol which was a decent movie, but not as great as everyone made it out to be. April showers… ALL day. Sigh…


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Fifteen years ago this month, Utah State University Press published my book "Unfortunate Emigrants": Narratives of the Donner Party. This is a collection of previously unanthologized Donner Party primary sources, some well known, some less so, and a few "new" ones, which I had struggled to locate in my own research. I edited them, annotated them, wrote introductions and biographical sketches, found portraits and a cartographer, and with the help of USU Press's editorial staff (thanks, John!), put together what I considered a respectable contribution to Donner Party scholarship.
My, how things have changed! In 1996 Internet was in its infancy, home computers were far less common, and there was no Google God, no Wikipedia, no instant access to a world of information in palm of your hand. Many of the documents that had been so hard to find can now be found online for free at places like Hathi Trust, Project Gutenberg, and Google Books; sites like Abebooks (my favorite), Alibris, and eBay make it possible to find original editions; and there are a number of print-on-demand outfits that can provide facsimile reprints relatively inexpensively.
The state of Donner scholarship has changed, too. In 1996, Joseph A. King's Winter of Entrapment (1992) was the latest word on the Donner Party, and a number of people so were taken with its revisionist claims that they ignored its bias and innumerable errors. Unfortunate Emigrants was, in small part, a response to King's book, but in a relatively understated way. Back then, Winter of Entrapment was the only significant history of the Donner Party since George R. Stewart's Ordeal by Hunger (1936; rev. 1961), but now we have Ethan Rarick's Desperate Passage (2008) and Daniel James Brown's The Indifferent Stars Above (2009) and can kiss both Stewart and King good-bye.
Unfortunate Emigrants is in print (as print-on-demand) and still sells a dozen or so copies each year. I still consider it a worthwhile compilation, but in the intervening 15 years we've learned much more about the Donner Party, and there are documents I'd like to add, to say nothing of typos to fix, errors to correct, and passages to rephrase. The state of scholarly publication is pretty precarious and a second edition is out of the question for the foreseeable future, but someday...
Sunday, July 31, 2011
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text: Yesterday was my last meeting with Devi and Aal in 2011. Another photo session again in front of Times Bookstore because the sparkling lights amazed Devi. My holiday in my hometown is going to be as usual : b-o-r-i-n-g as hell. Seriously in critical need of a vacation trip so I can post a bunch of great pictures here *sigh*.


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Monday Madness: Favorite Series or Season Finale
This week on Monday Madness, it's time to vote for your favorite TV finales! This poll is for season and series finales of both cable and broadcast shows. But this week there's a twist – for the first seven days, you can nominate your favorite finales and I'll add them to the poll! I'm doing this because I got so few nominations, and I didn't want to limit the poll to just my favorites.
This poll will be open for TWO weeks, and you can choose up to 10 of your favorite finales. Be sure to spread the word so your favorites will make it into the top 10! And as shows finish up their runs this year, you can nominate them for a spot on the poll!
Want more of a say in what makes it onto the poll each week? Be sure to follow me on Twitter, since I usually ask for nominations for the next Monday Madness the weekend before the new poll.
Without further ado, here's the poll for this AND next week's Monday Madness! Voting ends around 1AM May 21th.
Update: this poll has closed. I planned to do a results post like I do with other Monday Madness polls, but I realized any pictures I posted would be full of spoilers (or else very boring). So I decided to skip that part this time.
What's your favorite series or season finale? (Choose up to 10)
- Castle - season 4 finale "Always" (22%, 529 Votes)
- Castle - season 3 finale "Knockout" (13%, 322 Votes)
- Once Upon a Time - season 1 finale "A Land Without Magic" (9%, 223 Votes)
- Leverage - season 2 finale "The Maltese Falcon Job" (7%, 161 Votes)
- Leverage - season 4 finale - "The Last Dam Job" (5%, 130 Votes)
- Angel - series finale "Not Fade Away" (3%, 73 Votes)
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer - season 5 finale "The Gift" (3%, 68 Votes)
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer - season 2 finale "Becoming: Part 2" (3%, 62 Votes)
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer - series finale "Chosen" (3%, 61 Votes)
- Sherlock - season 2 finale "The Reichenbach Fall" (2%, 60 Votes)
- NCIS - season 6 finale "Aliyah" (2%, 55 Votes)
- Bones - season 4 finale "The End in the Beginning" (2%, 51 Votes)
- White Collar - season 1 finale "Out of the Box" (2%, 46 Votes)
- Chuck - season 2 finale "Chuck Versus the Ring" (2%, 45 Votes)
- Bones - season 3 finale "The Pain in the Heart" (2%, 42 Votes)
- House - season 4 finale "Wilson's Heart" (2%, 42 Votes)
- Supernatural - season 3 finale "No Rest for the Wicked" (2%, 41 Votes)
- Supernatural - season 5 finale "Swan Song" (2%, 40 Votes)
- How I Met Your Mother - season 1 finale "Come On" (2%, 39 Votes)
- Community - season 2 finale "For a Few Paintballs More" (2%, 37 Votes)
- Smallville - series finale "Finale" (1%, 36 Votes)
- Dollhouse - series finale "Epitaph Two: Return" (1%, 35 Votes)
- Warehouse 13 - season 1 finale "MacPherson" (1%, 32 Votes)
- Burn Notice - season 4 finale "Last Stand" (1%, 25 Votes)
- The Office - season 3 finale "The Job" (1%, 23 Votes)
- NCIS - season 2 finale "Twilight" (1%, 22 Votes)
- Newhart - series finale "The Last Newhart" (1%, 19 Votes)
- The Mentalist - season 3 finale "Strawberries and Cream" (1%, 14 Votes)
- The Finder - series finale "The Boy with the Bucket" (0%, 12 Votes)
- Numb3rs - series finale "Cause and Effect" (0%, 10 Votes)
- Robin Hood - season 2 finale "We Are Robin Hood" (0%, 10 Votes)
- The Mentalist - season 2 finale "Red Sky in the Morning" (0%, 9 Votes)
- St. Elsewhere - series finale "The Last One" (0%, 8 Votes)
- Community - season 3 finale - "Introduction to Finality" (0%, 8 Votes)
- Dallas - season 2 finale "A House Divided" (Who Shot J.R.?) (0%, 7 Votes)
- Numb3rs - season 5 finale "Angels and Devils" (0%, 6 Votes)
- GCB - series finale "Liplocks and Revelations" (0%, 2 Votes)
- Dynasty - season 5 finale "Royal Wedding" (0%, 2 Votes)
Total Voters: 965
Leave a Reply
16 Responses to Monday Madness: Favorite Series or Season Finale
A Land Without Magic was the best season finale ever!!! Once Upon a Time has quickly become my fave show! Love it and can't get enough!
LOVED the scene at the end! So glad to see my fave fictional couple FINALLY reunite!
Ugh, why is the Robin Hood season 2 finale up there? I hated that! It just made me sad 🙁
Show was awesome can't wait till season 2
I would like to nominate "GCB" season 1 finale "Liplocks and Revelations" also "Leverage" Season 4, "The Last Dam Job" I hate that GCB has been cancelled.
Season's 2 & 4 of LEVERAGE are my picks.. love them both.. couldn't choose which i would like the best. 🙂
The Leverage season finale's for 2 and 4 are definitely my favorites.
Leverage Season 4 The last dam job is the best for me 🙂
Leverage is the ONLY TV show I will not miss!It is the best show out there hands down.Thet have the Best Cast and Writers out there. Leverage is the only TV series that I own the whole series so far and I will buy Season 4 when it comes out June and will have my DVR set to record Season 5 when it starts.Thanks to TNT for airing this show,
Once Upon A Time and this years Castle were my 2 favorite! OUAT really set the bar high for all shows wanting to know what a fantastic finale is. I also loved the Leverage finales! It's a fantastic show that just doesn't get their due.
Leverage Finales always Rock!
All things Leverage are great!!!
My choice is the finale of season 2 of "Leverage", a very tense moment
Leverage always has the best season finale's!!!!!
Castle, Numb3rs, OUAT, my faves… With a few choice othets.
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A blog of me. sometimes I misspell stuff. it's pretty cool. Show your mom.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Stuff I do
This is a little story me and my friends were (are?) making about zombies taking over. This is a short story about me saving my friend Cameron in the middle of the desert surrounded by zombies.
This is what I do in Phisics. And Math. My friend Josh sits right behind me in both classes and he is REALLY easy to draw. Contrerary to popular beliefe I don't hate him lol
More of Josh. Thats him riding the llama. And him in the car.
I did this guy awhile ago. Thought it was cool. but I'm still not sure about what his feet look like. . .
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Michael V Schroeder
BYU Animation Major. Going into storyboarding, concept art, and 3D modeling.
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Jessica Cerniak
Department Faculty
Associate Professor
- Online
- Department
- Master of Arts in Psychology
- Institution
The Chicago School of Professional Psychology
- Biography
Dr. Jessica Cerniak's training as a clinical psychologist led her to study and work in various parts of the country and, more recently, internationally. She first earned a Bachelor's degree in Psychology and Communication Studies at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor. Dr. Cerniak then relocated to California and earned a Master's degree in Clinical Psychology, with an emphasis in Marriage and Family Therapy, at Pepperdine University. As part of that program, her training focused on Narrative therapy and work with culturally diverse children, adolescents, and families in school settings. Dr. Cerniak then transferred to the University of Denver where she completed a master's and doctoral degree in clinical psychology with concentrations in psychological assessment and child and adolescent treatment. She returned to Chicago to complete her APA-accredited predoctoral internship training at Advocate Illinois Masonic Medical Center. More recently, Dr. Cerniak completed a certificate in Global Education for the 21st Century at the UN Mandated University for Peace in Costa Rica, as well as a certificate in Maternal Mental Health through PSI and 2020mom.org.
Dr. Cerniak is a licensed clinical psychologist whose experience includes providing individual, group, and family therapy in a wide range of settings, such as elementary, middle-school, high school and college counseling centers; private practice; community mental health centers; and various hospital units, including emergency rooms and inpatient and partial hospitalization programs. She first joined TCSPP in 2006. Initially working as the associate director and then director of training for the Clinical PsyD program in Chicago, Dr. Cerniak transitioned into a core faculty Associate Professor position in the MAP program in 2011. In addition to teaching and conducting research, she is active in her local community, co-chairing and representing health professionals as a voting member on a county board focused on maternal, child and adolescent health, and she volunteers at local schools. Dr. Cerniak also is an active member of the CPA/SVPA Grassroots Stakeholder Team, and she serves as a peer reviewer for the Online Learning Journal as well as for the Society for the Teaching of Psychology (APA Division 2).
- Education History
Degree Institution Psy.D. Clinical Psychology University of Denver, Denver, CO M.A. Clinical Psychology University of Denver, Denver, CO M.A. Clinical Psychology with an Emphasis in Marriage & Family Therapy Pepperdine University, Malibu, CA B.A. Psychology & Communication Studies University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, MI
- Professional Memberships
Role Organization Member American Psychological Association (APA) Member Society for the Teaching of Psychology (APA Division 2) Registrant National Register of Health Service Psychologists Member California Psychological Association (CPA) Mentor Million Women Mentors
- Licenses
Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Illinois
- Community Involvement
Role Organization Co-Chair, Health Professional Representative, and Voting Board Member County Maternal, Child, and Adolescent Health Advisory Board Review Board Member, Peer and Ad Hoc Online Learning Journal (OLJ) CPA Grassroots Stakeholder Team Member California Psychological Association Volunteer Spanish immersion reading program Faculty Mentor Society for the Teaching of Psychology - APA Division 2 Former Peer Faculty Mentor National Center for Teaching and Learning, The Chicago School of Professional Psychology
- Areas of Expertise
Area Expertise Child & Adolescent Development Adolescence Social Development Marriage & Family Family Therapy Psychology Subdisciplines - Clinical Psychology Therapeutic/Theoretical Orientation Constructivist/Narrative Theory Family Systems Theory
- Presentations
Title Location Date Teaching lifespan psychology online American Psychological Association Convention, San Francisco, CA 8/2018 Students' successful completion of graduate psychology programs. 30th Annual Conference on Distance Teaching and Learning, Madison, WI 8/2014 The 21st century classroom: Using social media. Los Angeles County Psychological Association, Los Angeles, CA 10/2013 Training to train: Learning the role and responsibilities of an academic director of training. National Council of Schools and Programs of Professional Psychology (NCSPP), San Juan, Puerto Rico 1/2011 Putting the puzzle together: The path to a successful internship match National Council of Schools and Programs of Professional Psychology (NCSPP), San Juan, Puerto Rico 1/2011
- Publications
Cerniak, J. (2018). Leveraging the features of learning management systems (LMSs) in psychology courses. In R. J. Harnish, K. R. Bridges, D. N. Sattler, M. L. Signorella, & M. Munson (Ed.) The use of technology in teaching and learning (pp. 128-141). Retrieved from the Society for the Teaching of Psychology (APA Division 2) website https://teachpsych.org/ebooks/useoftech: .
Newhouse, N., & Cerniak, J. (2016). Student success factors in graduate psychology programs. Online Learning Journal, 20 (1), 70-92.
- Professional Skills
life span psychology, online learning at the graduate level, social media in the classroom, clinical training, clinical psychology, introduction to diversity and psychology


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Buried or Frozen: How Animals Survive Winter
"Boys, I need your help." It was a cold winter evening and I was walking the boys home from daycare. "What do you need Mami?" "I need a topic for Wild City," I replied. As much as winter can be wonderful in the city, I was fresh out of ideas. "Why don't you write about… Read More »


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Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
Innocent expressions of Love
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Raising Boys we would want to marry
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Are Friendships Forever?
Autherine @ www.resolutionsforwomen.org.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
For the Love of a Pissy Cat
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Rethinking Good Study Habits
"Varying the type of material studied in a single sitting — alternating, for example, among vocabulary, reading and speaking in a new language — seems to leave a deeper impression on the brain than does concentrating on just one skill at a time. " This is a new theory put forth to disprove all the others that we have been relying on to help our children learn. http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/07/health/views/07mind.html. Soon there will be another article disproving this one. I find that there is some value in most studies, and the more tools that we have to help our children learn the better they will perform in school. Every child learns differently, so read with a cautious eye and employ the method that will best suit your child.
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Monday, September 6, 2010
Dads - Both sons and daughters need you.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Dangers of Psychosis Drugs for the Young
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Boys: Knives, Lipstick and Pumps
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Devean and Ja'van: Your Life Mattered
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- What drives a mom to kill? (cnn.com)
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Pick safer school supplies with EWG's back-to-school guide | Environmental Working Group
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- Variety in short supply on school-supply lists (dispatch.com)
- Crayola going greener with 15-acre Pa. solar farm (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Lost the car key found the key to my happiness
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
But Will it Make You Happy
All the material things make me happy in the short term. It is instant gratification. Buying a nice dress that I don't really need, looking at a bigger house, the concept of a great big screen TV....all gives us that feeling of excitement. That feeling is often mixed with a sense in the pit of our stomachs that this new toy is too expensive or that the money would be more wisely invested in the retirement fund or the kids college fund. I am far from perfect at this; we all chase what we perceive as happiness. However, we can all try to identify what really makes us happy in our souls and channel our energy towards that purpose. Most often we will find that it is not a thing that money can buy. Playing in the backyard with the kids, walking on the beach or even looking at a beautiful photo of the beach, a peaceful afternoon nap, writing a free blog, catching up with an old friend, watching the kids discover something new, are all things that make me blissfully happy.
Nervously anticipating Kindergarten
Is 5 too young to ride the school bus? Not sure, so I will be driving him until we both get comfortable, which may be in a week or never. I have created a family calendar to keep track of all the activities. Already, there has been two mornings of pre-kindergarten camp, which we missed b/c mommy didn't rsvp on time, a parent orientation night, a meet the teacher night and two more "practice" days b/f the big first day. Apparently, the school is nervous about this too. I somehow felt comforted when I read his supplies list and saw that the major item was crayons - maybe, things aren't moving too fast, after all.
Smile for the camera - all together now.
What a great achievement it is to get all the boys to look at the camera at the same time! I take credit for the photo of just the boys (after many tries) and thanks to the very patient photographer at the Kennedy Space Center for the group photo. The photo was overpriced but we were so grateful to finally get a group shot that we purchased it.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Divinely Inspired
Friday, August 6, 2010
Are we all connected?
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Uplifted by Great Service!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Song that takes you to your Happy Place
What is your song?
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Potty training as a measure of success
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
A second chance at childhood fun
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Flying high but slowing down
Old Friends
5 Reasons to Be Thankful
1. Happy and healthy kids
2. Wonderful friends that are just like family.
3. A job in these tough economic times.
4. The ability to have a positive outlook on life.
5. The Gift of God.
What are you thankful for this year?
A taste of single motherhood
- enlist the assistance of friends and family
- create a schedule and stick to it as much as possible
- get a good night's sleep, you need your energy
- arrange play dates, preferably at your house
- try to cook for at least 3 days and pack lunches in advance
- order guilt-free meals for deliverykeep secret weapons (new toy, favorite snack) handy in case of an emergency tantrum
- make a "to do" list and focus on the important things, everything else can wait
- If you need to pick up a few things at the supermarket, enlist a friend or sitter to watch the kids; nothing can send a parent over the hedge faster than a child in the supermarket.
- So what if your little prince pours an entire bottle of baby oil on the floor, or the baby throws up on you on your way out the door? The unexpected happens, just take a deep breath and go with the flow.
At the end of the three weeks, and lots of help from friends and family I survived. I have to admit that I am no super mommy but I at least both kids are alive and well. I hope not to repeat this experience anytime soon but now I know that if I had to do it, we would all survive, just like the millions of hand working single moms out there.
Traveling with kids can be peaceful and stress-free
I recently read an article about the challenges of flying with young children and was not surprised to hear that parents experience high levels of stress and anxiety from the experience; however, I was amazed at how much anger and resentment other passengers directed at the traveling parents. Some readers commented that parents were "selfish" to travel with young kids and that the kids should be "drugged" with Benadryl. Those were the nicer comments. Several airlines are now considering placing families with young children in the rear of the plane and there have been several stories of parents being forced to leave the plane because of a crying baby. No one is more stressed by a crying baby or a toddler in the midst of a tantrum than the parents. Our family recently survived a 2 day, 12 hour road trip in the car with a 3 year old and a 1 year old. We also survived a seven hour (delayed flight) trip to the Caribbean. I decided to resist the urge to focus this blog on the controversy surrounding travel with young kids, and instead focus on helpful ways to have a peaceful and stress-free trip with the kids.
As both trips were manageable, but not entirely stress free (one roll on the floor tantrum in the middle of the airport, several "are we there yet", and "yelling and fighting in the back seat"), I asked a few friends with kids to offer suggestions. Below are the top ten suggestions.
• Buy a brand new toy and hide it until you get on the airplane or in the car. A new toy should buy you about 2 hours of quiet time.
• Even if the young child is potty trained, try using a pull-up for long trips. This will lessen the anxiety for both parent and child. No emergency stops on the side of the road or needing to go to the bathroom just when the flight attendant is blocking the isle with the drink cart.
• Give just enough juice and water to keep the kids hydrated. The last thing you need on a long trip is a child on a sugar high.
• For kids that are of TV/Movie age, pack a portable DVD player with at least 2 of their favorite movies.
• Bring their favorite snacks. Kids may not want those delicious snack packs offered by the airline
• Kids are weary of new surroundings, so bring a favorite toy, book, blanket, or stuffed animal – anything to make them feel at home.
• If possible, try to get seated in the same row on an airplane. If you have a toddler, seat her on the inside so that she will not be tempted to run up and down the aisle.
• If you are flying, take advantage of early boarding so that you will have time to get your bags stored and child settled.
• Whether you are traveling by car or air, travel light. No need to bring a case of diapers when you can pick up more at the local supermarket. Several airports/destination cities will have a place where you can rent a car seat and a stroller.
• If possible, drive or fly at nap-time. Wouldn't it be fantastic if your child could sleep through the flight or road trip?
If despite your best efforts, a tantrum ensues, the child gets an earache from the cabin pressure, or something unexpected occurs, take a deep breath, don't panic, and try to address the child's immediate need. Drown out the little voice telling you that everyone is looking at you and judging you as a parent. Hugs, kisses, reassurance and maybe the promise of a favorite treat at the end of the trip can turn a frown into a smile.
Have a good traveling tip? Help out your fellow parents by posting it below.
Vacations: Free yourself to live in the moment
I am back from an extremely relaxing five days on vacation. We left a few days early to escape the path of Hurricane Hanna but didn't leave without taking my oldest son in the ocean to ride the waves. There is nothing better than listening to him squeal with joy as we get hit by wave after wave. As I allowed my hair to get wet so that I could enjoy the moment, I began to reflect on all the things that I do on vacation in order to live in the moment. There are two rituals that I tend to live by. I skip the makeup (I cheat occasionally with eyeliner) and I keep my hair in a ponytail or a similar no hassle hairdo. You would be surprised at how much time this frees up to engage in other pursuits. Here are a few others that I love.
- Downsize. Eliminate everything that is time consuming. No high-maintenance hairstyle, or long make-up ritual and definitely do not pack any clothes that will require ironing.
- Shop at stores unique to your vacation destination. You can always visit the Gap and Target when you return home.
- Try a new restaurant or a new cuisine. Save the trip to the Cheesecake Factory or Red Lobster until you return home.
- Break the rules. Sleep late, let the kids stay up an extra hour, partake of that dessert you wouldn't dream of eating back home.
- Toss the car keys. Walk, bike, jog and meet a few new people along the way.
- Risk embarrassment. Limbo dancing or karaoke anyone?
- Break a habit. Stay away from the cell phone, laptop, CNN, blackberry and focus on your travel companions, new friends or new venture.
- Experience something new. Always wanted to play golf, scuba dive, finally learn how to swim? Go for it!
It is often difficult to free ourselves from the walls that are built around us or those we build ourselves, but a week or two away is a fine time to try. A few years ago, I would have admired the ocean from afar because I told myself that I couldn't go into water where I couldn't see my toes, or I wouldn't get in because I didn't want to get my hair wet. Over the years, I have learned that vacations aren't just "same thing, different city" but a chance to relax, release and sometimes even reinvent ourselves.
A vacation for the Soul
I am so used to my daily routine of getting the kids ready for school and our nanny share, sometimes having a bite for breakfast, speeding through traffic to get to work on time, working a full day, picking up the kids, doing evening chores, having playtime with the kids, getting them ready for bed, and getting up and doing it all over again, that I didn't even realize that I was not exhaling. As I write this, I am sitting at a table in our little cottage looking out at the beautiful grounds. I have many of the same responsibilities, but for the next five days, I have time to stop and enjoy my time with the kids and inhale the ocean air.
For anyone who is thinking about skipping the vacation this year, remember that a change of scenery awakens the soul and it allows the mind to embrace new possibilities. When your mind is uncluttered and your soul is at peace, you are free to contemplate how to get that promotion at work, how to carve out more time for the family, how to finally find the time to unclutter your house, how to get your financial house in order and how to engage in spiritual activities that feed the soul. I can't wait to dip my feet in the water again tomorrow.


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Dead Fish
Only dead fish go with the flow
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If there is a colour/style/size combination not available on the site, just send an email - most things are do-able...


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Purrfect Pals
230 McRae Road NE
Arlington, WA 98223
http://www.purrfectpals.org[/one_third] [two_third_last] [show-map id='9′] [/two_third_last]
Purrfect Pals:
Purrfect Pals was born from the tireless dedication of a woman who has committed her life to cats: Kathy Centala. Kathy founded Purrfect Pals in 1988, originally as a boarding facility for cats which also helped the occasional homeless cat. Quickly Kathy found herself taking in more and more orphaned cats, overwhelming her small Brier, Washington home.
In the early 1990s Kathy moved Purrfect Pals to a spacious 5 acre spread in rural Arlington, Washington. By converting her new home into a shelter, Kathy was able to provide a comfortable sanctuary to hundreds of cats. And best of all for Kathy, she gets to sleep with 20 cats every night!
Because of our rural location, Purrfect Pals has pioneered off-site adoption events and placement of cats in partner pet stores. In the early years we placed just a few dozen cats every year, but now we've grown to the point where we place more than 2,500 cats every year through our shelter and more than 20 off-site locations across Puget Sound. [divider style="medium"] [one_half]
About Puuurfect Pals:
To learn more about this shelter adoption program, spay and neuter clinic, surrendering a cat, volunteering, fostering or any other questions you may have, please give them a call or send them an email!
Please note that if you need to surrender your cat to Purrfect Pals, you must make an appointment by phone first. Due to limited space, they need to plan for cats' arrivals and cannot take any cat at their shelter without an appointment. [/one_half] [one_half_last]
No kill shelter:This shelter will not euthanize any cat.
Senior cats:These cats are already mature and they know their personality.
Spayed and neutered:All cats have been spayed and neutered.


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Firstly, before I get to the review, I am in a very emotional state after finishing this series. I can't believe it's over and I am not ready to say goodbye to Mara Dyer and the boy she'll love to ruins.
Secondly, I can confidently say that this is one of the best book series that I have read to date. Michelle Hodkin is exceptionally clever and I bow down to her literary talent.
In Retribution, Mara teams up with Jamie and Stella. Not only are they are embarking on quest for answers to the experiments conducted on them, but Mara is looking for Noah who she hasn't seen since the collapse.
Running into old acquaintances, Lukumi and the now maniacal Jude, Mara finds herself having to choose between life or death in order protect Noah.
It wasn't until around 200 pages in when we were finally past it feeling like the X-Men and Jamie being the poor man's answer to Charles Xavier, that the pacing started to pick up. From then on, it was back to being the addictive series that I just couldn't put down.
With help from Mara's brother, Daniel, the team (Mara, Jamie and Stella) discover deep and dark secrets regarding the manifestation of their abilities and the woman responsible, Dr. Kells. Might I just add that I adore Mara and Daniel's sibling bond which is why I sobbed like a baby when Mara was saying her goodbyes.
Actually, the moment when Mara was forced to choose to die in order to protect Noah broke me. It was written so beautifully, especially when Noah is told that he was meant to be the hero and "slay the dragon, but he fell in love with it" instead. The dragon, being Mara whose shadow affliction interferes with the prophecy that Noah is destined for greatness. I thought it was superb how all those flashbacks with Mara's grandmother tied together with her current state and Noah which in the process explained a lot. I like how Retribution gave us answers.
There are plenty of revelations in Retribution. You can never predict what will happen, but you can be sure that you'll be an emotional wreck when it does. There's twists and turns and there was never a moment when I was a hundred percent sure that I knew what would happen next. From Mara channeling her inner Jesus and resurrecting to Noah putting a gun to his head. I couldn't safely say that I knew either of them would survive, but I'm glad they did. I think I would've been in mourning for years if Noah Shaw had died.
Hodkin is a genuis. Looking back, now that I've completed the series, it is interesting and frustrating to see how all the little details fit together like a jigsaw. One detail that I loved in particular was the fact that the initials of Mara's full name, Mara Amitra Dyer, spell out MAD and Noah's initials, Noah Elliot Simon Shaw, spells out NESS. Put them together and bam, you get MADNESS! Which is pretty much sums up the series. Madness. But a perfect madness.
It's going to take me a long time to get over this series. It took me by surprise how quickly I came to invest and care for these characters and I had a heavy heart as I finished the final page, closing the book and bidding them farewell. The ending, in my opinion, did it justice. It wrapped everything up nicely with lives still intact.
I'd like to thank Michelle Hodkin for this masterpiece of a series that emotionally ruined me and for setting my standards impossibly high in guys. Seriously, if I don't marry Noah Shaw I will sue. He is the fictional love of my life.


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How an iPad Point of Sale (POS) System Can Benefit Your BusinessStart with a tablet, add multifunctional apps, and more profits can be yours.
iPad point of sale (POS) systems are taking over from traditional POS among many smaller retailers and restaurants — and small businesses that make the switch are ringing up a ream of advantages.
Among retailers of various sizes, only 20 percent have implemented mobile POS, but another 56 percent plan to step to these systems over the next three years, according to a 2016 study by Boston Retail Partners. Mobile POS systems currently on the market run on operating systems that include Apple's iOS, Microsoft Windows and Android.
The whole mobile POS shebang really started, though, back in April of 2010, when Apple rolled out the first iPad. Many stores and restaurants still prefer Apple's tablet, often connecting it to hardware such as credit card readers and cash drawers.
Some bigger businesses such as Nordstrom and Barneys embraced iPad or iPod touch POS early on, too, and lots of enterprises expect to join in over the next few years. Small businesses, however, have been POS pioneers.
The iPad is a great platform for mobile POS because of its spacious touchscreen, easy user interface and impressive computing capabilities, said Richard Crone, founder and CEO of Crone Consulting and a recognized expert on mobile strategy. The abundance of business apps for iPad is another big plus.
Here are five ways in which an iPad POS can boost your business.
The POS system becomes more than just a POS
Traditional standalone POS systems can handle cash register functions, but that's it, Crone noted. In contrast, iPad POS software can integrate with apps for accounting, inventory management, payroll, mobile payments and even customer relationship management (CRM) and enterprise resource planning (ERP), for instance. Tons of add-on apps are available from third-party software vendors.
As you build and streamline your business, you can keep adding more apps.
iPad POS systems are fantastic line busters
iPad POS systems eliminate the cash register line as a choke point, Crone noted. Instead of standing behind a counter all day, your retail sales associates can be out on the floor doing what you've really hired them to do: interact with and sell to customers.
An associate might suggest accessories or services for an item the customer is looking at — or subtly upsell the customer to a higher-end alternative, for example.
The IHL Group, a global research and advisory firm for the retail and hospitality industries, found that when associates are properly trained and work side by side with customers on transactions, the increase in sales can be as much as 25 percent. "[More] often than not [consumers] feel they are working on a project together rather than being 'sold,'" wrote Greg Busek, an IHL analyst.
According to Crone, some stores are now taking a cue from The Apple Store and redesigning their floor plans to take advantage of the iPad's mobility.
Customer loyalty is a cinch
Customer loyalty software is often built into POS apps, letting you easily gather customer information during transactions and then send out thank you notes and other promotional emails. This software can also deliver instant discounts at checkout.
Transactions and couponing get even easier with the addition of mobile payment apps. These apps allow customers to complete the payment process in the store or restaurant from their own mobile devices, saving even more time for employees.
You can bring your business with you
iPad POS systems also boost managerial productivity. Many small business managers are not nine-to-fivers. If there are still tasks to accomplish at closing time, you can take your iPad home with you to work at your leisure at the kitchen table rather than toiling away after hours in the back office.
Cloud-enabled POS apps can be accessed from any other web-capable device, too, such as an Android phone or Windows PC. When you're on the road, why not review the latest inventory data and place supply orders from your laptop while sipping your morning coffee in your hotel room?
iPad POS systems can add new intelligence to innovation
Managers can analyze the sales reports and customer information collected on the iPad to create new and more effective merchandising and marketing programs, Crone pointed out.
Phoenix-based Zoyo Yogurt, for example, discovered that only 20 percent of the customers at its frozen yogurt restaurant were "regulars," and that many of those who weren't from the neighborhood visited the shop to celebrate a special occasion, such as a raise at work or a good grade at school.
To help drive more return trips, Zoyo coined a new tagline, "What are you celebrating today at Zoyo?"
What will you learn from your iPad POS system?


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Random Thautz for the week 2008-12-07
By Andy On December 7, 2008 · Leave a Comment · In life, tweets
- Everybody loves a brown eye girl on Mondays http://tr.im/1oii #
- Sitting in a mtg enjoying Caffeine #
- RT @warrenellis: I don't care if it's World AIDS Day, I still don't want AIDS. #
- @jgderuvo Terry Hatcher is just another example why people who "pretend" for a living shouldn't be listened to for political advice in reply to jgderuvo #
- I haven't finished my exterior xmas decorations… it's snowing now. I need to… dammit… er… fu-la-la-la #
- @8101harris Thanks for the link! Unfortunately, I already have the hard/high lights hung and I can't justify paying for the rest in reply to 8101harris #
- RT @chrisbrogan is giving away a $500 Kmart Gift Card on his blog – simply tweet or comment to enter http://urlbrief.com/27bb3f #
- RT @recordedbooks: Next 5 that tweet me get a link to download chap 1 audio of Leslie Connor's Waiting for Normal plus 2 student worksheets. #
- @warrenellis hello in reply to warrenellis #
- @diarstein Don't stay away from your 'puter for long. It gets lonely and starts talking to other 'puters when you are gone. in reply to diarstein #
- @greggrunberg It's in the bottom of a box with a bunch of old books, in a misbegotten tangle with 4 other unidenfitied cables… in reply to greggrunberg #
- Why aren't you reading Freak Angels by @warrenellis ? http://tr.im/1qtv #
- @greggrunberg Oh, just give up on the Cube and buy a Wii – it plays all of your GC games & sets you up for new ones in reply to greggrunberg #
- RT @recordedbooks: Free chap 1 of Waiting for Normal audiobook. A great read/listen! (rt as you please!) http://tr.im/1qyf #
- Way to go, @ningwang1 RT @CNETNews: Ning puts the handcuffs on porno networks http://tinyurl.com/5n5wcq #
- @andyconley is a dork in reply to andyconley #
- Way to go, @ningyang1 RT @CNETNews: Ning puts the handcuffs on porno networks http://tinyurl.com/5n5wcq #
- I'm better now #
- New blog post: My day before Thanksgiving http://tinyurl.com/5h8oc5 #
- A look@ 2008 from a guy in 1968 who thaut pilgrims lived in 1928 http://tr.im/1s5o pretty much nailed it… minus ninjas & Michael Jackson #
- RT @TheBloggess: http://tinyurl.com/69mk95 Chainsaw bayonet. Because pumpkins are that fucking dangerous. #
- @ginawinkler I'd rather you give birth to twins with no drugs than me having multiple cavities filled, too in reply to ginawinkler #
- @warrenellis So… another night as normal? in reply to warrenellis #
- How to act by James Franco… really opened my eyes to the art of the actor http://tr.im/1stb #
- Ya know, children's tv isn't that bad… http://tinyurl.com/6l7n86 RT @ungestion #
- @jgderuvo Obama uses a ZUNE? That says more about him than most political writeups in reply to jgderuvo #
- Why you should always check your kid's homework http://tr.im/1u5w #
- Request to record "The Librarian: Curse of the Judas Chalice" Sunday on TNT just approved by my Tivo! WOOHOO -gettin' me some Bob Newhart #
- RT @warrenellis: is friday is too early is FREAKANGELS is free: http://www.freakangels.com/?p=68 #
- It's a Wonderful Internet http://tr.im/1wm8 RT: @MichaelTurk #
- The geek hierarchy: http://is.gd/aRK RT @MichaelTurk: #
- I'm a goofygoober! #
- We're ALL goofygoobers! #
- Wow, if high school history had been like this, I might remember more… or not http://tr.im/1x1y #
- @warrenellis BRAIN CUSTARD in reply to warrenellis #
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Anencephaly is a condition that hinders normal brain and skull bone development, according to Genetics Home Reference. During the first couple of weeks of embryonic development, the neural tube that develops into the central nervous system may fail to close, resulting in anencephaly.
When the neural tube fails to close properly during embryonic development, it exposes the central nervous system to the amniotic fluid in the womb, leading to the degeneration of the system tissue, explains Genetics Home Reference. Consequently, anencephaly patients lack the cerebrum and cerebellum, which are responsible for hearing, thinking, vision, movement coordination and emotion. The exposure also hinders the formation of the skull bones. These malformations cause severe nervous system conditions, which may lead to fetal death and miscarriage.
The risk factors of anencephaly can either be genetic or environmental, notes Genetics Home Reference. Changes in the genes, such as methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase that aid in processing vitamin folate, may result in vitamin deficiency that predisposes the neural tube to anencephaly. Vitamin folate deficiency may also be caused by lack of folic acid in the diet of a woman who is yet to get pregnant. Other conditions such as diabetes mellitus and obesity may also expose the fetus to anencephaly.


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After a major PR effort built around public apologies, high-profile efforts to embrace new food safety standards, compensation to victims and other efforts to repair the breach with consumers, Jack in the Box began sorting out the marketing strategy that would lead to its revival. Within four years, Advertisng Age was reporting Jack was "back." Last week, it basked in its 24th consecutive quarter of same-store sales growth.
Thankfully, few marketers face the rebuilding job that confronted Jack in the Box. But it forced the chain's marketing executives to embrace ideas that might not have survived in calmer corporate times. Chief among them was the decision to reclaim its "Jack" symbol, a discarded clown figure aimed at kids, and give him new life as the irreverent "CEO" of the company-a spokesman that delivers food quality messages while poking fun at the biggies of the burger business.
Management commitment to the crucial details of running a quality operation was essential to this Jack in the Box story, but the advertising was, and is, still a key ingredient in the new face the marketer presents to its target customers. That might not have happened without the 1993 crisis to fuel change and some calculated marketing risk-taking.
As Jack in the Box Chairman Bob Nugent put it: "While [the food contamination disaster] was a tragic thing, a lot of good things came out of it. Also what came out was the [corporate culture] that exists today that otherwise wouldn't have existed."


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Industry News
Gold 'N Hot Professional Styling Tools
Gold 'N Hot Takes User Advice
Gold 'N Hot professional styling tools from Belson have been leaders in the ethnic and multi-textured styling market since the brand's debut 25 years ago. The company recently tapped its loyal users for ideas to improve the popular appliances.
Improvements have begun with the gold-plated, spring-grip and marcel curling irons with new stainless steel barrels for better heat conductivity, a more user-friendly temperature control and a more durable and flexible cord.
For more information, visit www.belson.com.


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Day 7 – 10/05/2003 (Saturday) Duns to Wallington
There are no maps or elevation profiles for today's journey. There was also very little cycling involved.
I needed to be at Heathrow by 11 o'clock on Sunday the 11th to collect Mrs johnm55 after her trip to Canada. (I also needed to be back at work at 8 o'clock on Monday the 12th). Cycling back home to Wallington unfortunately wasn't an option. I could have probably thought up an excuse for not being back at work, but not picking Mrs johnm55 up at the airport…. I don't like to think of the possible consequences.
As I had stayed the night with my sister and her husband, we loaded the bike back into the pick-up for the trip back to Duns to say cheerio to mum. My sister then took me down to Berwick to catch the train back to London. I put the bike in the guard's van and settled down to make the return journey in fewer hours than it had taken me days to cycle up.
The East Coast Mainline follows roughly the same route as my bike trip, so as we flashed past various places I had been on the bike I took some photos through the window of the train.
The Tyne Bridges
The Angel of the North
York Minster – it is there honest
Having ate, drank and dozed my way back to London, I wheeled the bike out of King's Cross Station onto the Euston Road ready to ride back home to Wallington. But… after a week of cycling on quiet back roads with about three cars per hour passing me, I decided that dicing with death and London traffic could wait for another day. So I wheeled the bike back to the station and onto the Thameslink train to East Croydon
The Galaxy on the train
I did have to cycle back from East Croydon, but I was up to that by the time I arrived.
The next morning I was up bright and early to make sure that I was at Heathrow in time to pick up a jet-lagged wife back from Toronto. We both had a good week.


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28.50 AC (TRACT 2) located in a country rural location
Ideal for your Homestead, Farm or your Dream Home.
Ideal for horses or cattle
Spring fed creek
Approximately 1380 feet of State Highway paved road frontage
Totally fenced & gated
Terrain is level to a easy roll & hilly
Mountain views
No restrictions
800 to 1000 elevation
Plenty of wildlife with great hunting
Surrounded by more farm land
Green Belt exemption
Utilities available (NOT installed) and several areas to build on.
This tract of land has a lot of potential for:
Development, Horse Property, Dream Home or to Investment.
Approx 3 miles from Standing Stone State Park (visit web site – know for horse trails) & Dale Hollow Lake.
More acreage available.
Standing Stone Hwy Hilham, TN 38568
Price to Sell at $85,500
For more information contact:
Debra Dodd


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Before leaving Paris I got a lot of repair patches of Macon&Lesquoy, two amazing French designers that produce, amongst other things, these embroidered patches with which to customize and to embellish all wears. They do also fantastic embroidered broaches as this cute golden wretch above. By the way, even an anonymous t-shirt can become unique and original!
The design of these cute patches is fantastic: simply, ironic and chic. There's plenty of cute design, able to satisfy each one tastes. In the pics around this post, you can see my selection: a rainbow (of course), a cloud, a smocking gun, a pint of beer, a bigfoot and also the Beatles in their yellow-submarine version. If before knowing Macon&Lesquoy, to have a hole in my wears was a little drama, now it is a chance! Check their creations at www.maconetlesquoy.com!


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|Click here for Action Asthma.
|asthma allergies
asthma information for children
|facts about asthma
The online asthma resource find out what cause asthma.. information, experts, medication, education, learn about and find facts about this condition, how it affects kids, children, infants, how to control, manage and prevent it. Prevention of allergies is important we provide treatments, news, medicine research, self management plan, and help with relieving this condition where you experience breathing difficulty. asthma inhaler Find out about a peak flow meter, inhaler and monitoring.
A common condition where there is long-term inflammation or swelling of the airways in the lungs. asthma inhaler - As a result of the inflammation, the airways are hyper-reactive (twitchy or irritable) andthey narrow easily in response to a wide range of triggers asthma inhaler.
Airways narrowing is usually caused by a combination of muscle spasm in the walls of the airways, and inflammation leading to swelling and excessive secretion of mucus.
There are four main symptoms, any of which may suggest to a doctor that a person has the condition: COUGH, CHEST TIGHTNESS, WHEEZING and SHORTNESS OF BREATH.
Worsening symptoms? You should consult your doctor or nurse if you notice any of the following:
A variety of things can trigger symptoms in some children and adults but not all. Different people are affected differently. asthma inhaler - One or two days after the cold starts, they may develop coughing, wheezing, chest tightness and shortness of breath. These symptoms may last for several days, such as being woken at night by shortness of breath or coughing.
Increased shortness of breath on waking in the morning
treatments, symptoms, information, manage asthma
A falling peak flow and big differences between your morning and evening readings
Shortness of breath on exertion
Activity limited by this condition
Sometimes exercise brings on breathlessness and this may be worse on cold, dry days, or after a change in the weather. Even normal, active childhood play may cause symptoms. In children and younger people, coming into contact with house dust, pollen, cats, dogs or cigarette smoke may cause symptoms. Most people with this condition find that they are worse in smoky atmospheres.
Peanuts can make some people with this condition cough and wheeze. For some, milk, orange drinks, fizzy drinks and even alcoholic drinks may produce symptoms of this condition. Generally, things that you eat are much less likely to bring on an attack than things that you breathe.


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Theatre, Script Rehearsals & TradingThe Drama Major is well underway and the Sunday performance is coming together nicely. Our specialist drama teacher, Gerald, is working with very talented actors to piece together the origins of theatre through the ages.
Student Host Robin has had an unfortunate encounter with the Sword of Damocles
A spectator's perspective of the rehearsals from the stalls.
One of our talented actors deep in character
Script rehearsal was in motion for our Film Making Major. The students will soon put their detailed organisational planning into practice in front of the camera.
The class ended with a in-depth group discussion on the key learning outcomes that should be applied in trading and across the business domain.


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The Sex Pistols showed up in Vegas over the weekend to play and party, seemingly ignorant of the brutal lawsuit allegations -- and we were there.
Johnny and his pistols were firing all night at Carey Hart's new club Wasted Space at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino.
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Read Die viertorige Stadt. Roman. by Doris Lessing Free Online
Book Title: Die viertorige Stadt. Roman.
The author of the book: Doris Lessing
Edition: Dtv
Date of issue: May 1st 1989
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Language: English
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Dorris Lessing's classic series of autobiographical novels is the fictional counterpart to Under My Skin. In these five novels, first published in the 1950's and 60s, Doris Lessing transformed her fascinating life into fiction, creating her most complex and compelling character, Martha Quest.
Author Biography: Doris Lessing was born Doris May Taylor in Persia (now Iran) on October 22, 1919. Both of her parents were British: Her father, who had been crippled in World War I, was a clerk in the Imperial Bank of Persia; her mother had been a nurse. In 1925, lured by the promise of getting rich through maize farming, the family moved to the British colony in Southern Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe). Her mother installed Doris in a covenant school, and then later in an all-girls high school in the capital of Salisbury, from which she soon dropped out. She was 13, and it was the end of her formal education.
Lessing's life has been a challenge to her belief that people cannot resist the currents of their time, as she fought against the cultural and biological imperatives that fated her to sink without a murmur into marriage and motherhood. Lessing believes that she was freer than most people because she became a writer. For her, writing is a process of "setting a distance," taking the "raw, the individual, the uncriticized, the unexamined, into the realm of the general."
Lessing's fiction is deeply autobiographical, much of it emerging out of her experiences in Africa. Drawing upon her childhood memories and her serious engagement with politics and social concerns, Lessing has written about the clash of cultures, the gross injustices of racial inequality, the struggleamong opposing elements within an individual's own personality, and the conflict between the individual conscience and the collective good.
Over the years, Lessing has attempted to accommodate what she admires in the novels of the 19th century — their "climate of ethical judgment" — to the demands of 20th-century ideas about consciousness and time. After writing the Children of Violence series (1952-1959), a formally conventional bildungsroman (novel of education) about the growth in consciousness of her heroine, Martha Quest, Lessing broke new ground with The Golden Notebook (1962), a daring narrative experiment in which the multiple selves of a contemporary woman are rendered in astonishing depth and detail. Anna Wolf, like Lessing herself, strives for ruthless honesty as she aims to free herself from the chaos, emotional numbness and hypocrisy afflicting her generation.
In the 1970s and 1980s, Lessing began to explore more fully the quasi-mystical insight Anna Wolf seems to reach by the end of The Golden Notebook. Her "inner-space fiction" deals with cosmic fantasies Briefing for a Descent into Hell, 1971), dreamscapes and other dimensions (Memoirs of a Survivor, 1974), and science-fiction probings of higher planes of existence (Canopus in Argos: Archives, 1979-1983). These reflect Lessing's interest, since the 1960s, in Idries Shah, whose writings on Sufi mysticism stress the evolution of consciousness and the belief that individual liberation can come about only if people understand the link between their own fates and the fate of society.
Lessing's other novels include The Good Terrorist (1985) and The Fifth Child (1988); she also published two novels under the pseudonym Jane Somers (The Diary of a Good Neighbor, 1983, and If the Old Could., 1984). In addition, she has written several nonfiction works, including books about cats, a love since childhood. Under My Skin: Volume One of My Autobiography, to 1949 was recently joined by Walking in the Shade: 1949 to 1962, both published by HarperCollins.
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Read information about the authorBoth of her parents were British: her father, who had been crippled in World War I, was a clerk in the Imperial Bank of Persia; her mother had been a nurse. In 1925, lured by the promise of getting rich through maize farming, the family moved to the British colony in Southern Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe). Like other women writers from southern African who did not graduate from high school (such as Olive Schreiner and Nadine Gordimer), Lessing made herself into a self-educated intellectual.
In 1937 she moved to Salisbury, where she worked as a telephone operator for a year. At nineteen, she married Frank Wisdom, and had two children. A few years later, feeling trapped in a persona that she feared would destroy her, she left her family, remaining in Salisbury. Soon she was drawn to the like-minded members of the Left Book Club, a group of Communists "who read everything, and who did not think it remarkable to read." Gottfried Lessing was a central member of the group; shortly after she joined, they married and had a son.
During the postwar years, Lessing became increasingly disillusioned with the Communist movement, which she left altogether in 1954. By 1949, Lessing had moved to London with her young son. That year, she also published her first novel, The Grass Is Singing, and began her career as a professional writer.
In June 1995 she received an Honorary Degree from Harvard University. Also in 1995, she visited South Africa to see her daughter and grandchildren, and to promote her autobiography. It was her first visit since being forcibly removed in 1956 for her political views. Ironically, she is welcomed now as a writer acclaimed for the very topics for which she was banished 40 years ago.
In 2001 she was awarded the Prince of Asturias Prize in Literature, one of Spain's most important distinctions, for her brilliant literary works in defense of freedom and Third World causes. She also received the David Cohen British Literature Prize.
She was on the shortlist for the first Man Booker International Prize in 2005. In 2007 she was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature.
(Extracted from the pamphlet: A Reader's Guide to The Golden Notebook & Under My Skin, HarperPerennial, 1995. Full text available on www.dorislessing.org).
Reviews of the Die viertorige Stadt. Roman.
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Fun book for children and their parents
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Spitfires struggle in 8-2 loss to Knights
LONDON Seven games into the season and the Windsor Spitfires look like a team that's run out of gas.
The Spitfires struggled all night to keep pace with the London Knights Friday and fell 8-2 before 9,046 at Budweiser Gardens.
"That's two fast teams we've played," said Spitfires head coach Bob Boughner, whose team was shutout at home by Guelph Thursday.
"(London's) probably one of the most talented teams, on paper, in our league and that was simply a lesson in how to play hockey. We have to get better as a team."
In the last two games, the Spitfires have been outscored 13-2 and been outshot a total of 87-45.
"It's been rough," Spitfires forward Jordan Maletta said. "We're not getting shots on net.
"We're trying to make the pretty play and if you see most goals in this league, they're not like that. They're just going hard to the net."
In just over a five-minute span, the Knights took control of the game with three goals as Josh Anderson, Brett Welychka and Alex Broadhurst scored to put the home team up 3-0 after 20 minutes.
"We have to be better," Spitfires forward Kerby Rychel said. "They're pretty much the most skilled team in the league and if you play like that, that's what can happen.
"Being down three against a team like that, you just can't let that happen. They controlled the whole game."
Maletta gave the Spitfires a brief spark of hope cutting the lead to 3-1 in first five minutes of the second period, but the Spitfires gained no momentum from the goal.
Windsor produced just 10 shots in the first 40 minutes and Max Domi countered Maletta's goal to restore London's three-goal lead after 40 minutes.
"We can't make a 10-foot pass and we seem to be gripping our sticks tight," Boughner said. "We talk every night about outworking the opposition, outhitting them and outshooting them and we didn't do any of that."
A parade to the penalty box is also hampering the Spitfires, who have allowed a league-leading 42 power-play chances to the opposition this season including five to the Knights Friday.
"We're leading the league in minors and that's going to bite us," Maletta said. "We just have to play our game and keep it simple."
Things got no better in the third period for Windsor as London's Matt Rupert centred a pass and had it bounce in off Spitfires defenceman Nick Ebert before Domi wired his second of the game over the glove of Windsor goalie Jaroslav Pavelka to give London a five-goal lead.
"We had a lot of skating the last week and had our legs going," Welychka said. "We know we're a strong team and what we're capable of with this offence."
Rychel got one back on a Windsor power play, but the Knights answered with goals by Matt Rupert and Broadhurst to finish the scoring.
"Obviously, that wasn't our best effort," said Rychel, whose team fell to 3-3-0-1 on the season. "We're still .500 and we're not playing our best hockey, so we just have to come ready Monday."
The Spitfires are back in action Monday when the Sarnia Sting come to the WFCU Centre. Game time is 2:05 p.m.
firstname.lastname@example.com or Twitter @winstarparker
Friday Result
Knights 8 Spitfires 2
Windsor 0 1 1 – 2
London 3 1 4 – 8
First period: 1. London, Anderson 1 (Domi, Horvat) 7:01, 2. London, Welychka 4 (M.Rupert, R.Rupert) 10:34, 3. London, Broadhurst 3 (Maatta, Griffith) 12:27. Penalties: Bilcke W (fighting), Restoule L (fighting) :57, Domi L (interference) 3:48, Sieloff W (unsportsmanlike conduct), Domi L (unsportsmanlike conduct) 17:23, Ho-Sang W (tripping) 17:57.
Second period: 4. Windsor, Maletta 3 (Ho-Sang, Clark) 4:04, 5. London, Domi 2 (Welychka, Anderson) 13:20. Penalties: Vail W (roughing) :17, Ebert W (holding) 11:05, Ho-Sang W (hooking) 13:55.
Third period: 6. London, M.Rupert 3 (Ferry, R.Rupert) 5:22, 7. London, Domi 3 (Raine, Zadorov) 8:51, 8. Windsor, Rychel 2 (Ebert, Ho-Sang) 12:57 (pp), 9. London, 15:06 (pp), 10. London, M.Rupert4 (Anderson, Horvat) 15:06 (pp), 11. London, Broadhurst 4 (Tierney, Griffith) 17:43. Penalties: M.Rupert L (slashing) 5:28, Clark W (unsportsmanlike conduct), Griffith L (unsportsmanlike conduct) 11:58, Domi L (high sticking) 12:49, Rychel W (roughing) 13:36.
Game stats – SOG – Windsor 4 6 12 – 22 London 13 15 15 – 43 Goal (shots-saves) – Windsor: Pavelka (L,3-3-0-0) (43-35). London: Bailie (W,3-2-0-0) (22-20). Power play (goals-chances) – Windsor 1-3. London 1-5. Referees: Bob Langdon (7) and Ryan Hutchison (20). Linesmen: Chad Drown (51) and Kevin Hastings (61). Three stars: 1. Max Domi (L), 2. Mat Rupert (L) and 3. Josh Anderson (L). Att: 9,046.


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In Defense of the Marines
Last week, a video was posted on YouTube of some soldiers urinating on Taliban corpses. Here is a clip from ABC News. I posted that link, as opposed to the actual video on YouTube itself because I thought it instructive to see the way it was presented by ABC.
The video shows four young men, probably all in their twenties, or younger, and I remembered being twenty, and in the army:
and, I wonder what I would have done. I'd like to think that I'd have done the honorable thing; but, when you put it in the context of being "in country" for seven months, losing seven comrades and suffering additional non-lethal casualties, I honestly don't know.
My eighteen years in the Army was most notable for finding a prostatic nodule in a 40yo while doing an over-forty physical exam, which required a rectal exam. It was an exam he would not have otherwise had, and would have likely went on to develop metastatic disease. So, that is the only life I may have saved, that I know of, and that alone, made my eighteen years worthwhile. Nothing heroic, no charging up a hill or throwing myself on a grenade or weaving through crossfire to a fallen soldier, nothing like what we are asking of these young men and the thousands of other men and women serving today.
I have an acquaintance who was in Iraq and heavily involved in combat. He doesn't talk about it, but when I'd ask him how he did it, he mentions " I'd just put on my military face…" and that's pretty much all he'd say.
These men live in brutal conditions, in a constant-threat environment, existing in the reality of kill or be killed that we cannot even imagine.
I would not presume to judge these young men. I will leave that to their conscience and developing maturity.
I do not like that ABC made no attempt to consider their actions in the context of the theater of war in which it occurred–shame on them. We do not send saints to war, we send men; men who are all too human; we send them to make war so that we, ahome and asleep in our beds, might be free.