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Med School
Joined: 19 Dec 2010
Posts: 20
Posted: Mon Dec 20, 2010 10:40 am
Post subject: study tips
Hey guys!
I know a couple of people that have just finished their first year in Medicine (at different Unis) and both have said that the volume is so huge and it is hard to stay on top of it.
I just thought I'd ask some of the Med Students on this forum how do they study? Quite frankly, I'm really looking forward to it, and know I'll delve right into it. But do you guys have tips or strategies to remember the content that you learn from week to week? What methods do you put into place to retain the info for the long term (because I know some unis have semester exams but others have end of year exams)?
Thanks so much in advance, I'm looking forward to reading what you guys do.
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Joined: 01 Apr 2008
Posts: 259
Location: Perth, WA
Posted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 1:38 am
Post subject:
1. keep good notes, and keep them incredibly well organised and indexed. It will take you maybe 20 minutes a week to sort them out, but trust me.... for first year, they're a life saver.
Mind you.... I've just finished second year, and have just thrown EVERY note I've written away.
2. Listen in lectures. It seems obvious, but you'll be blown away how many people show up, and tune out. If you listen, you'll take away gems that will help you study, and will help iron out the problem areas.
3. Have a life. Studying medicine should be fun... not just hard work. I think the best test, is to see whether you're still capable of spending time with people and NOT talking about medicine. if you can't, then you're studying too hard.
Good luck!! its a great ride so far
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Joined: 19 Dec 2010
Posts: 20
Posted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 11:11 pm
Post subject:
Thanks for your tips Lovebite. Can I ask, in your own experience, what has been the best way you have found to keep your notes organised? As you mentioned you are throwing away all your notes, I assume you handwrote them?
Did you at all keep your notes electronically as well?
I have heard that some students use a program like OneNote to edit their lecture notes. Have you had any success with this?
PS: why are you throwing away your notes? Such valuable valuable pieces of paper!! lol
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Joined: 01 Apr 2008
Posts: 259
Location: Perth, WA
Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 6:03 am
Post subject:
Look, there is no perfect system.... its all about fidning what works for you.
I handwrote all of my notes, but thats because for me, I find the process of writing them to be more beneficial if I use a pen and paper.
I bought loads of folders with plastic sleeves.
Other people used one note, and seemed to like it. I guess it depends on whether you really want to keep them all for the long term.
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Joined: 11 Jan 2011
Posts: 12
Posted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 11:39 pm
Post subject:
Great advice!
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Joined: 09 Apr 2014
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We've seen some particularly inept ways to wrap up martial arts films, but the 1982 magical kung fu flick Ninja In The Dragon's Den takes bad movie endings to zeniths that have not been replicated in the last 30 years.
In the finale above, the protagonists square off against an evil master who walks on stilts and spars by palming a cannonball. This is puzzling, but barely worth mentioning in the grand scheme of things.
No, the true action comes at 3:30, when the douchebag heroes unveil their secret weapon, whereupon the movie convulses to a conclusion. The scene is safe for work (but not your mental health).
For what it's worth, the film's intro is a training montage you can dance to. Via, of course, Youtube insanity archivist Mr. Sardonicus.

subset: commoncrawl


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HILLSVILLE — Shoppers by the thousands are expected to descend on the Hillsville gun show and flea market, as well as the Sylvatus flea market and numerous yard sales, this weekend.
Roads in the vicinity are expected to be clogged with shoppers galore, so the Virginia Department of Transportation issued the following traffic advisory.
Travelers heading to the annual Labor Day weekend flea market should be prepared for considerable traffic delays.
The town's popular event will be held Aug. 31 through Sept. 3.
VDOT officials said in a news release that people not attending the flea market and gun show are encouraged to avoid the area altogether.
"Thousands of visitors are expected to converge on a one-mile section of Route 58 Business in Hillsville," the news release said. "As a result, sidewalks will be crowded with pedestrians and bumper-to-bumper traffic will be moving at a crawl throughout the area. Drivers should use extra caution, watch for police directing traffic and pay attention to electronic message boards in the area."
VDOT said that these routes are available to those approaching the Hillsville area:
Interstate 77 — Exit 14 (Hillsville/Galax)
Those planning to attend the flea market are encouraged to take I-77 and use Exit 14 (Hillsville/Galax) onto U.S. 58 Business.
Congestion is expected on I-77 in this area and police may be directing traffic at the Exit 14 and U.S. 58 Business interchange to promote safe travel.
Traffic will be directed onto Virginia 714 (Old Galax Pike) to help alleviate congestion.
Motorists should watch for stopped vehicles in this area. Westbound U.S. 58 Business traffic will be reduced to one lane approaching the I-77 interchange from Old Galax Pike.
U.S. 58 Bypass (western interchange with 58 Business)
Motorists using the U.S. 58 Bypass' western interchange to exit onto 58 Business should use extreme caution and watch for heavy traffic congestion.
Those not attending the event and traveling westbound on the bypass should use the left lane to avoid exiting vehicles.
Drivers are advised not to park on the U.S. 58 Bypass or on the ramps onto 58 Business. "No Parking" signs will be posted around the interchange.
U.S 52 event traffic can use Howlett Street or West Grayson Street.
Northbound U.S. 52 traffic will not be permitted to turn left onto westbound U.S. 58 Business.
Southbound 52 traffic will not be allowed to make right-on-red turns onto westbound 58 Business.
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Many readers are lamenting the disappearance of bookstores and dire predictions of the collapse of the print book.
But those of you who love the feel and smell and look of print books on your bookshelves: take heart. The print book has a future.
The solution is already at hand: print-on-demand books (POD). It is a publishing model that can keep the print-book industry alive, but which completely undercuts the current book industry model, which is:
* From your expensive Manhattan offices, try to guess which manuscript, among all those sent to you by hordes of agents, will have a chance to return your investment;
* decide to print only those books, and reject the rest (even including great books that you guess "won't sell");
* offer the author an advance against sales -- then hope the book will sell enough to recoup what you paid him;
* invest gadzillions of dollars into a substantial print run on that book;
* send out a hired sales force to approach all the bookstores and retail outlets to carry it;
* ship the book to distributors like Ingram and Baker & Taylor, and to the big chain warehouses, where the copies are stocked;
* wait for the chains to send them to all their stores, guessing how many copies each might need;
* advertise heavily and expensively for those titles you think have the best shot, while ignoring the rest (and hoping that one or two of them "break out" and become surprise bestsellers);
* wait a month or six weeks to see how well it sells in the stores;
* if it doesn't sell, watch as the bookstores then ship all the unsold copies back to the publisher, and/or...
* stick the unsold copies on "remainder" tables, coast to coast, where they are sold at a fraction of retail to bargain-hunters.
This is an incredibly slow, cumbersome, and wasteful process in the digital age. It rejects, up front, a lot of books of merit because publishers think they won't be profitable, while accepting a lot of books that prove not to be profitable, anyway. It requires huge investments in resources, throughout the enormously expensive book pipeline, costs that jack up the price of books to the point where print-book sales are falling off a cliff, now (see the preceding link). It requires the customer to leave his comfortable home, burn ever-more-expensive gasoline, fight traffic, and to drive to some store, perhaps many miles away; then find parking in some mall lot; then wander the aisles looking for it...often only to find that the store may not carry the title, or may have run out. Then drive home.
In contrast, here's the POD (print on demand) model, used by Amazon's "Createspace" program and others:
* Accept pretty much any book manuscript, letting customers -- not the book industry, the reviewers, and the bookstore owners -- decide whether there's a market for it.
* Have the author send in his manuscript and book cover formatted digitally, so that you can then file it on your big computer.
* Wait for customer orders to come in.
* When they do, push a button, and a fully bound book pops out of a fancy machine, looking every bit as good as anything produced in NYC.
* Mail the book to the customer.
* Offer the author all rights to his work, and much higher royalties to participate than NY publishers do, because this process is so comparatively inexpensive that you can afford to.
Now, consider how many steps, how much time, and how many resources this model saves.
POD will be the salvation of the print-book industry, in my humble opinion. As bookstores close, the current publishing industry model, described above -- which depends entirely on bookstore outlets to hawk their wares -- will collapse, too. It's simply too cumbersome and inefficient in the digital age.
And for those of you who lament the disappearance of bookstores, you know what? POD will offer you more books than ever: not just new titles, but also backlist titles. If you're a thriller fan, like me, you can take heart in knowing that Alistair MacLean and Mickey Spillane will never go "out of print," because they'll live on a computer, waiting for their fans to order them. FOREVER.
When the big, traditional publishers wise up, they'll realize that they can monetize their backlist and out-of-print titles this way, and make untold millions. They are sitting on goldmines of past inventory, which they can't afford to market under the current business model -- but which are easy to release and market as ebooks and POD books.
Oh yes: Everything I just said goes double for ebooks. Which is why Amazon is killing the competition with its Kindle Direct Publishing, and why even J.K. Rowling has made the jump to ebook self-publishing.
THAT is the future of publishing, friends. Yes, books, whether ebooks or "pbooks," have a great future -- and so do authors like me.


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Tails 1.0: A bootable Linux distro that protects your privacy
Surf anonymously without requiring a degree in computer security.
Whatever your primary OS, Linux distro Tails 1.0 offers a plethora of security features to help you work online without worrying about privacy issues.
These days, it seems as though anyone who uses the Internet is a tasty morsel for insatiable data thieves. Marketers, governments, criminals and random snoops won't be satisfied until they can snarf whatever information they want about us at any time.
If you want to dodge ad trackers, have sensitive sources to protect or you just want to conduct your normal online activities without being spied on, then The Amnesiac Incognito Live System (better known as Tails) could help.
Tails, which just came out in its 1.0 version, is a live 32-bit Debian Linux-based operating system that runs from a USB flash drive, CD/DVD or SD card. (A live system is a complete, bootable OS on removable media.)
+ ALSO ON NETWORK WORLD 10 nerdiest Linux gadgets +
Tails' default desktop is the popular GNOME Linux desktop.
Tails runs like any other live Linux OS -- with an added safety feature: It erases your session from your computer's memory at shutdown so there are no leftover traces. It runs on most Windows, Linux and Mac computers, with some exceptions (see below).
Sometimes a 1.0 software release is a major milestone. In this case, though, there are no dramatic changes from previous releases; Tails development has been steady -- it has been releasing new (and stable) versions every 12 weeks.
[Want more more tips on how to keep your info secure? Check out "The paranoid's survival guide, part 1: How to protect your personal data."]
System requirements
Tails is just under a gigabyte in size, needs at least 1GB RAM and requires a computer with an x86 processor. That describes pretty much any mainstream PC with an Intel or AMD CPU. You need only download and copy it to a USB drive, CD/DVD or SD card.
A CD/DVD is the most secure medium to use because it is read-only; on the other hand, a USB drive or SD card is a lot faster, and you can set up an encrypted persistent storage volume to save settings and documents. Be sure to verify your download with the signing key; just follow the instructions on the download page.
If you want to try Tails out, though, you need to be aware of some possible hurdles.
To start with, Windows 8.x presents special problems for booting removable media. To meet Microsoft's Windows 8 certification requirement, hardware vendors must ship Windows 8 PCs with Secure Boot enabled. This effectively locks out all other operating systems and any boot media not approved by the vendor. Every computer vendor handles this differently, with different types of BIOS and different settings, so you'll have to consult your computer's documentation to see how to do it on your computer -- or if you even can.
In addition, it takes a bit of fiddling to start Tails on a Mac system. The website's Known Issues page has links to instructions for running Tails on Macs. It also lists some specific systems and USB drives that don't work with Tails. And, of course, it doesn't make much sense to run Tails on a virtual machine because the host system will give you away.
(If you can't get Tails to boot on your Windows or Mac PC, many of the security applications included in Tails can be installed individually on Windows and OS X systems.)
Once you've got it going, you'll find that Tails' default desktop is the popular GNOME Linux desktop. If you (or your users) aren't comfortable with GNOME, Tails can masquerade as the more familiar Windows XP.
Two types of security
Online security has always been difficult to achieve because the Internet is built on open protocols and wasn't designed for anonymity or encryption. It's easy for anyone with access to the routers, servers and wires that handle Internet traffic to track a user's activities and eavesdrop. Ordinary system and network administration tools, such as packet sniffers and network debuggers, can see and record your location, the sites you visit, the contents of emails, instant messaging conversations and file transfers, and capture cleartext passwords.
Tails offers two types of protection: anonymity and encryption.
Anonymity is the more difficult of the two. If you want anonymity, you need to foil traffic analysis -- analysis of the trackable metadata that Internet routers require. Tails does this by routing your Internet travels through a service called Tor (which stands for The Onion Router).
Tor, which was invented by the U.S. Naval Research Laboratory for protecting government communications, is a distributed, anonymous global network of routers that steers your Internet workings through a twisty chain of encrypted TCP connections. Each link in the chain knows only about the links that it connects to: the previous links and next hops. No single relay knows your whole data path. Tor also gets around any Internet fences or roadblocks. It is available for anyone to use and is maintained by a global community of volunteers.
Tor network diagram courtesy Wikimedia Commons, CCA 3.0
As cool as this is, it has some weaknesses. It's slower than unprotected Web surfing, which is an inevitable consequence of taking a devious path to your online destinations. This is mitigated to a degree because Tor keeps you on the same route for 10 minutes, and then randomizes you to a new one.
In addition, Tor might not foil traffic analysis by any entity, such as a government, that has the resources to capture and analyze traffic globally. And keep in mind that, while Tor is beneficial for everyday Web surfing and online shopping because it foils traffic analysis and user profiling, as soon as you log into anything, you've given up your identity to whatever degree the site protects, or shares, user data.
But the biggest technical weakness in Tor is exit nodes. Tails has a warnings page with a diagram showing how this works. In a nutshell, eventually your packets have to leave the Tor network on the last hop to your destination, and anyone running an exit node can easily snoop on your session. In fact, a researcher did this back in 2007 and collected an impressive amount of sensitive information.
There is a cure for this, and that is to encrypt your data.
Tails addresses the problem of encryption by bundling a nice set of tools. Tails' default browser is Iceweasel, a rebranded version of Firefox that has been configured to use Tor, Adblock Plus and HTTPS Everywhere, an application that forces HTTPS protocol on all websites that support it. Tails also includes the KeePassX password manager and the excellent Linux Unified Key Setup (LUKS) utility for encrypting hard disks and USB drives.
You also get Nautilus Wipe, which securely deletes files; Open PGP, which signs and encrypts documents and emails; and Off-the-Record Messaging, which encrypts instant messaging sessions. The Claws Mail email client and Pidgin IM chat client both come with encryption already configured; Pidgin automatically creates a new fake user every time you start Tails.
Other applications
Tails includes a number of additional useful applications, including a virtual keyboard for dodging hardware keyloggers, and additional advertiser protection via Adblock Plus and NoScript. You also get a good set of productivity software: the OpenOffice productivity suite; graphics, audio and video software; and some nice accessibility tools, such as Orca and Dasher.
A significant omission is Adobe Flash, which Tails doesn't support because it is considered a giant privacy risk. So you won't be able to watch Flash videos on YouTube, though you can watch HTML5 movies. Unfortunately, this also means that other sites that are Flash-heavy will be unusable on Tails.
You can install new Linux applications (and Tails updates) if you run Tails from a USB drive or SD card by using the included Synaptic software manager.
You'll need the administrator password to install or remove software, but the operating system usually disables the password by default as a security measure, to reduce the chance of malware making changes on your system. So you'll have to enable it from the More Options screen when you first start up Tails.
Privacy on the Internet is very difficult to accomplish. The Tails advantage is putting it all together in a polished, easy-to-use package. The Tails About page lists a number of similar projects, though in my opinion, Tails is the best maintained and most dependable.
Your Internetworking will, by necessity, be restricted. Not by Tails -- as the main technical barrier Tails presents is the inability to surf Flash-heavy websites along with somewhat slower speeds. But you should get acceptable performance with ordinary Web surfing, and with streaming music and movies.
However, meaningful security takes work. Your own online behavior is important as well, because using Tails isn't proof against user foolishness.
Many users might have a bit of a learning curve with Tails, especially if they're not familiar with the software included with it. You'll have to take extra steps to set up good email and file encryption, and anyone you exchange emails or encrypted files with will also have to work with some special configurations.
Fortunately, the Tails documentation is quite good; you can read it online, and the local copy that comes with Tails is conveniently bookmarked in Iceweasel. And if you're concerned about privacy, it will be worth it.
Carla Schroder has been system and network administrating on mixed Linux, Windows, and Mac networks since 386 processors roamed the Earth, has written three splendid computer books (Linux Cookbook, Linux Networking Cookbook, Book of Audacity), and hundreds of computer how-to articles for various online publications.
This article, Tails 1.0: A bootable Linux distro that protects your privacy, was originally published at Computerworld.com.
Read more about linux and unix in Computerworld's Linux and Unix Topic Center.
This story, "Tails 1.0: A bootable Linux distro that protects your privacy" was originally published by Computerworld.


text:
Anybody can find fault. Fault doesn't seem to get lost very often, and it usually doesn't really hide that well either. Sooner or later, fault always comes marching out, demanding to be recognized by someone, anyone, guilty or innocent.
But there sure are a lot of people who devote their lives to seeking out something that never was lost to begin with. Why are so many people absolutely thrilled to find those faults and be the first (or even among the hundreds) to point out those faults so that everyone knows that they spotted them and recognized them.
Like get a life, dude. (Or dudette!)
You don't need a degree or any special training or even to be above average in intelligence (or anything else) to find those faults that weren't really hiding. These internet trolls that seem to delight in exposing each and every flaw and then dissecting it with minute attention to detail seriously have some issues. Above all, they remind me of chickens.
I'm not being a smart alec about that. Seriously, they do act like chickens. I realize that most of America has never been intimately acquainted with chickens. For many people, their closest exposure has been at a petting zoo or even just a news clip on television. In reality, there's nothing cute about a flock of chickens, especially if they have decided that they don't like one of their flock mates.
It's horrifying to see what they will do then. They will literally, over a period of time, peck that chicken to death, while also driving it away from food and water and otherwise making their lives as miserable as possible. It isn't all of the chickens in the flock that do this, just a handful out of the group participating in this "troll" behavior is enough to result in the pecked chicken's death.
Hence the expression of "henpecked" that we have often heard used to refer to a husband who is being micromanaged by his wife to an oppressive degree.
Sure, there are lots of theories about why these chickens will do this. Usually, overcrowding and other stress factors will get the behavior started. It can happen in free range chickens, but it's far less common. As a country person would say, "once in a blue moon." In confined and crowded conditions, even when the chickens have the recommended space and ability to go outdoors into the sunshine, it can really get started though. The more stress and crowding, the more the behavior shows up.
Maybe mankind is just like a flock of chickens. We're getting more crowded and stressed, and we're seeing more outbreaks of "troll" behavior. On occasion, this behavior accelerates and becomes violent rather than just verbal (or written) attacks. When this happens, the usual cry is to restrict access to potential weapons.
Gun control isn't going to change the behavior, folks. Chickens commit homicide regularly, and have never figured out how to use firearms. I have a gun and have had guns most of my life, yet I have not committed murder, nor even shot at anyone.
I have worked armed positions in my lifetime. I've also been threatened with a gun on more than one occasion, although not while working. Usually, the threat was by a police officer of some kind. Was the threat warranted? No, I wasn't armed, wasn't threatening the officer, was not committing a crime, and usually had no idea what was going on or why I had a gun in my face. Each time, it turned out to be some kind of mistake, quickly resolved, and I was not handcuffed or arrested.
I must have some caveman DNA floating around and connected to my violent genes. My weapon of choice has always been throwing rocks. I'm pretty good at chucking them too or was before I got hurt. Southern Mississippi, however, is starved for rocks. Our rocks have to be imported from elsewhere. I guess that's why I haven't done any rock chucking in a long time.
But I digress…
This troll behavior is an indicator of a deeper problem or fault in our society, one that we need to address. It's just as real as any tectonic plate's fault on our planet's crust, and indicative of an equally deep flaw in our society. Fault in this sense is a very real concept regarding what is happening today. This fault is an early sign of henpecking that can and eventually will turn homicidal in some individuals. Granted, not all of these individuals will ever become physically violent in person. Many of them may be too intimidated in person to even say "boo!" to a stranger, let alone become verbally confrontational. Even so, they feel that they have the right to do so, often in very unpleasant ways, on the internet.
I'm not sure that the spirit of the right to free speech includes the right to say things just to hurt other people, whether it is merely an emotional hurt or any other kind of hurt, even if it is commentary based on truth. I certainly do not think that condoning troll behavior and allowing them to surf the cyber world in search of fault which they can then use as their war cry as they begin yet another flaming attack on some unwitting soul.
Do I think I would turn homicidal? Not with the current level of stress and crowding, but I know that even I have certain points where I may well rationalize violent behavior if I am honest about myself. Remember, the word stress is just another word for stimuli. Breaking into my house when I am home is going to qualify as a stress. So is attacking a family member. Heck, even attacking my dogs is a stressor! I also tend to get rather confrontational if I feel my home turf (aka house and yard) is being intruded upon, something I came to grips with last year when a neighbor's dog tried to claim our backyard as his personal turf.
We have to find new ways of adapting to living in smaller spaces, to working closely with others, to living closely with them. We have to identify individuals that have reached that magic red line that defines when they are going to become violent, and then come up with appropriate intervention. All of that without causing new stress by stripping away personal freedoms and rights.
It's a tall order, but the end result is worthwhile. It means creating a society that encourages supportive and nurturing behavior rather than glorifying confrontational and violent behavior. It means doing away, worldwide, with the concept of war too. It means creating a worldwide society that encourages growth, on each and every level, as well as celebrating diversity and individualism.
Yeah, I know—it sounds like Utopia.
It really is Utopia, I suppose. It's not impossible though. Gene Roddenberry dreamed of it with his Star Trek world. I'm not the only dreamer. The world just needs a lot more dreamers, a lot more people who are willing to ostracize and discourage those who want to be trolls, and willing to encourage people to be something they all possess the ability to be.
With a heart.
Maybe we need to remind everyone of our mothers' old adage while we're at it.
"If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
Don't forget to visit our new location for this blog at www.exogenynetwork.com!


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A report issued this week by the state Auditor General David W. Martin said Okaloosa County�s use of bed tax revenue to pay for beach patrols, lifeguards and a beach shuttle bus is not allowed under state law.
A report issued this week by the state Auditor General David W. Martin said Okaloosa County�s use of bed tax revenue to pay for beach patrols, lifeguards and a beach shuttle bus is not allowed under state law.
Read a copy of the report. >>
Martin also recommended that the county restore the tax revenue spent on those services from May 2010 to May 2012 to its bed tax account.
During that period, the county paid $1.9 million to fund a portion of lifeguard and beach patrol services provided by the Destin Fire Department and Okaloosa County Beach Safety. The county also spent $564,000 to fund a portion of the beach shuttle service.
The Auditor General said the county should return the nearly $2.5 million to its tourist development fund.
Some county officials disagree.
County Administrator Jim Curry said that recommendation is one that the county �may somewhat dispute� in its official response to the report.
�The recommendation was based on a 1990 Attorney General Opinion. It�s 22 years old,� Curry said. �I just feel like a more appropriate course of action would be to seek a new, updated Attorney General Opinion specific to the county or to seek legislative remedy, perhaps.�
The Auditor General�s report said state statutes that govern bed taxes, or tourist development taxes, do not �expressly authorize� the use of that revenue for lifeguarding, beach patrol and beach shuttle service.
The report also said the Attorney General Opinion from July 1990 concluded that bed taxes may not be used to fund any �general governmental functions owed to the public at large.�
Curry said the county has based that use of bed tax revenue on three legal opinions that support it as appropriate.
County commissioners also have determined that those uses of the tax money are directly related to promoting local tourism.
Commissioner Nathan Boyles questioned whether the Auditor General was qualified to offer legal opinions.
�With respect to Mr. Martin � I note that behind his name are the initials CPA, and I think that makes him more than qualified to conduct financial audits,� Boyles said. �I�m less convinced that makes him qualified to render legal opinions with regard to statutory interpretation.�
Boyles said the Auditor General�s use of the 1990 Attorney General Opinion �overlooks changes in the statutes� that have occurred in the past 22 years.
He said the county has used its bed tax money on items that are of �greatest importance� to the community and the tourism industry.
�One of the items that has been identified of critical importance is beach safety,� Boyles said. �I think that is the underlying reason those allocations have been made, and I think that�s a good and important justification.�
The Auditor General�s report, which was released Tuesday, issued a wide-reaching critique of county commissioners� oversight of the Tourist Development Council and the county�s use of bed tax revenue.
In addition to county spending, fraud prevention, travel expenses and accounting procedures, the report admonished the county for various conflicts of interests.
The Auditor General found that the county �purchased goods and services from companies or organizations that were affiliated with members of the (board of county commissioners), the TDC, or a TDC subcommittee, contrary to law.�
The report listed three purchases, made through one of the TDC�s advertising firms, which occurred between May 2010 and May 2012.
The county paid $27,066 to the Crestview Area Chamber of Commerce for sponsorships of the Triple B Festival in Crestview. At the time, County Commissioner Wayne Harris was the executive director of the Crestview chamber.
Harris, who remains in that position, said in a written statement that those sponsorships of the festival did not benefit him or his family.
�I did not personally or materially benefit either directly or indirectly, nor did any of my family,� Harris said in an email to the Daily News. �The Crestview community did gain from the largest (Triple B) ever and the increase in revenues was of great value to the region.�
In another instance, the county paid $17,500 for two companies to promote and advertise local volleyball tournaments. At the time, a TDC member was an owner or director of the two companies.
The third purchase noted in the report involved the county paying $2,200 for a company to provide aerial advertising. A TDC marketing subcommittee member was, at the time, the president of the company.
The report did not name the TDC member of subcommittee member.
County commissioners are scheduled to approve their response to the Auditor General on Jan. 8. The AGO�s final report could be issued in February.
Curry said the Auditor General also plans to return to the county within 18 months to determine if its recommendations have been enacted.
�We take them very, very seriously,� Curry said. �These are best practices that they�re coming back with and we want to try and fulfill all of those.�
Contact Daily News Staff Writer Kari Barlow at 850-315-4438 or email@example.com. Follow her on Twitter @KariBnwfdn.


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|August 2019
|Home | Sunday, August 11, 2019
|Novel Writing
|Dates: December 1, 2018 - September 23, 2019, Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday
Location: WriterHouse
|The WriterHouse located at 508 Dale Ave. in Charlottesville, Va...Is offering a nine-month class on Writing, Revising, and Pitching your Novel getting it out of the drawer and off to market...With instructor Randall Klein, it all starts Monday January 14, 2019...(more)
|Memoir Writing
|Dates: December 18, 2018 - December 5, 2019, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Location: WriterHouse
|Memoir in a Year...The WriterHouse located at 508 Dale Ave in Charlottesville, Va will be offering a year-long class on Drafting and Revising your book with instructor Lisa Ellison...This year-long class begins Thursday January 24, 2019 thru Thursday December 5, 2019...Applications...(more)
|One-to-One Mentoring
|Dates: January 1, 2019 - December 31, 2019, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Location: Big Brothers and Big Sisters
|Big Brother and Big Sister is expanding it's mentoring program...Results have shown that one-to-one mentoring is making a big difference to children living in our community, and as the need for mentoring continues to grow, Big Brothers and Big Sisters has...(more)
|Education @ Live Arts
|Dates: March 1, 2019 - December 31, 2019, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Location: Live Arts
|Give the Gift of Theater Education, It's the gifting season and this year give yourself or someone you love a Live Arts class, workshop, or summer camp... Live Arts is located at 123 East Water St. in Downtown Charlottesville, Va...Whether your...(more)
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The Oakland Raiders will release tight end Kevin Boss in a salary-cap move after he spent only one season with the team, a league source said Monday.
It is expected to be announced Tuesday, with more move likely including the release of linebacker Kamerion Wimbley, league sources said.
Boss, 28, was due a $2 million roster bonus Friday and has a $2 million base salary for next season. He signed a four-year, $16 million deal with the Raiders last August, including $8 million guaranteed, in leaving the New York Giants.
He caught 28 passes for 368 yards and three touchdowns with Oakland.
The Raiders also announced they have made one-year contract tender offers to restricted free agent defensive lineman Desmond Bryant and three exclusive rights free agents: defensive end Mason Brodine, cornerback Bryan McCann and fullback Marcel Reece. The team also confirmed it has restructured the contract of linebacker Aaron Curry.


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October is here
Friday, October 2, 2009
...and I'm not so happy about it! I am a summer baby, born in July, and I love warm weather! I don't like it HOT, but I like it warm, and definitely not cold! Snow?! Forget about it! I want no parts of it! So, as I sit here wishing that time would slow down, life goes on.
It's pretty quiet here on my blog as of late, as I'm sure you've noticed. We're STILL busy with football with practice 3 times a week, and a game either on Friday or Saturday. Tomorrow is our 5th game and I'm hoping we win! Unfortunately, we've lost all of our games, but I hope that that changes tomorrow! The only two touchdowns were scored by my son, though, so of course we're happy about that! (My son plays Running Back, is on the kickoff team, and also plays on Defense as the Backup Linebacker. So he's pretty much in the game all the time!) I'm extremely proud of him and I hope that he keeps perfecting his skills so that he can accomplish his dream, which is to be an NFL football player. He's 13 now, and is currently 5'8" (same size as me!!!) and weighs 150 lbs. He is a big boy but he always has been! He was 9 lbs. even when he was born!
I also have a birthday party for a coworker to go to tomorrow. The party actually starts at 5 but since we have to be at the field at least an hour and a half before the game, we have to be there at 6:30, with the game starting at 8. I expect it to be over around 10, and then depending on how tired I (we) are afterwards, I'll decide then if we'll go to the party. My coworker's birthday was today and 3 of us went to lunch at a local Argentine chicken place (which is awesome!) and that was pretty nice, but I'd love to go to the party and have a few Yager-bombs! (I've been known to have a few drinks a couple of times a year!)
Tomorrow I plan on getting up semi-early (although I do love to sleep in!) and get some household duties taken care of. I'm having an electrical issue and last week I had to move my living room furniture around to lessen the load on certain circuits that keep shorting out. I'm actually looking for another place right now, because there's been a leak in my roof, coming into my bedroom window (it's indented about a foot from my wall) that my landlord hasn't fixed since April when I told her about it. I also called her about this electric issue and have yet to hear back from her about it. So, rather than continuing to pay an outrageous electric bill ($300+ a month) because my windows are so old (they're still the old metal, sliding kind) and my heat is electric, I'm just going to move. We're also still having issues in regards to what I briefly mentioned here back in July, and I'm tired of living here and having my children deal with constant problems.
On Sunday there's an Open House for a house for rent that I'm going to try to check out. The house is an older farm-type house, the former home of Mary Risteau, the first woman elected to the House of Delegates. The house was built in the 1700s and is gorgeous! It has 28 acres, 2100 sq. ft. My only concerns are who is responsible for cutting the grass, since I obviously don't own a tractor, and the electrical system as well as insulation. (I don't want to be stuck in the same situation as I am now!) The house was dropped from $1650 to $1250 and has 4 bedrooms. It's really time to move! I've lived in my current residence for about 6 years and I'm ready!
As you may or may not know, I am a government contractor. Well, September 30th is the end of the fiscal year for the government, so it's been busy at work. Our contract also ended on that date, but luckily it was extended until the end of March next year. Not sure what will happen then, but since I'm the secretary, I'll know before most others, so I'll hopefully have enough time to start looking for another job, if necessary. I'm also in the union, and they negotiated a contract for us starting October 1st that allows us all to have a 10% raise. This is in addition to the regularly scheduled raise, so I'm pretty excited about that! I'm hoping to trade in my car by the end of this month. It's starting to overheat if I idle too long. It's a 1997 Hyundai Elantra, and I've had it for a little over 3 years, and it's served it's purpose with me. There's a few minor repairs that I need to have taken care of, then I'm trading it in. If I can, I'd like to get a Nissan Altima, a newer model. I've always loved those!
I have some reviews and giveaways that I will be posting within the next couple of days, and I am debating on having a Christmas Extravaganza, but with working and the kids, I'm not sure if it will work out, but I'm still thinking about it! I also plan on baking a TON starting the end of November, so that will take up some of my time for the holidays! I'll keep you updated on the Christmas Extravaganza!
As far as football, I love it, but the end is near. Our last game is on Halloween. (YES! Halloween!) So I have to see if my daughter can go trick-or-treating with someone else, just so she'll get candy. I wish I had a bigger house because I'd have a Halloween party for the kids and their friends! My parents did that in our house back in West Virginia, in the attic, and it was soo fun! Recently, my friends and I were talking about that on Facebook. I'll never forget that!
I also won tickets for Six Flags America here in Largo, Maryland, from MyCokeRewards.com, and I have to use them SOON! It's hard to plan it with football games being rearranged but I'm hoping to take the kids down there within the next couple of weeks. Fright Fest is coming up, and none of us have been to that, so that would be great!
On October 16th, a good friend of mine is having back surgery. It's a risky surgery and I'm a little worried for him. Please lift him up in prayer. His girlfriend, one of my BFFs, had a rollup door fall on her head (luckily it didn't kill her!!!) and she's been having problems with her neck obviously, so they're both kind of bad off right now. She's in a neck brace, so they asked me to drive them down there the morning of the surgery, and take her home, since she can't drive with the brace. I'm happy to help them out as they've fed us at their home so many times in the past couple of years, it's a small thing I can do to give back to them. I requested off of work for that day, so I could be there for them and make sure he is okay before I take him home. I'm actually kind of hoping to get the house I mentioned above so they can move in with us and I can help them, and vice versa, if necessary, because not only is she out of work because of this injury and on Worker's Compensation, but she's laid off from her job as of today. He, obviously, can't work due to his back pain. I love them both so much and hope that they'll be okay.
As always, thanks for stopping by and reading my blog, entering my giveaways, and being my friends! Hope all is well with you and yours!


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Next ACA crisis: Small biz costs?
Think the canceled health policies hurt the Obamacare cause? There's another political time bomb lurking that could explode not too long before next year's elections: rate hikes for small businesses.
Like the canceled individual health plans, it's another example of a trade-off that health care experts have long known about, as the new rules for health insurance prices create winners and losers. But most Americans won't become aware of it until some small-business employees learn that their premiums are going up because of a law called — oops — the Affordable Care Act.
Story Continued Below
Some will learn the opposite, that their premiums are going down because of the law. But as we saw with the canceled individual health plans, it's the losers who will get most of the attention.
And the timing will be terrible for Democrats: A lot of those small businesses will have to start dealing with their new premiums in October — just in time for Republicans to make it an issue in their midterm election campaigns.
( PHOTOS: 12 Democrats criticizing the Obamacare rollout)
There are no widely accepted estimates for how many people could be affected, but even if it's a relative minority, it won't matter politically — because Democrats will once again have to defend the administration's claims that the majority of Americans who have employer-based insurance won't be affected by Obamacare.
"The biggest shocker for the small-business community is going to hit in October, which is interesting because it will be prime time for the election," said Jessica Waltman, a top lobbyist at the National Association of Health Underwriters.
Here's why: Next year, small-business health plans — those that cover 50 or fewer workers — will have to comply with a wide range of new rules, particularly the ones that say the businesses can't be charged more if their workers have health problems. Their premiums will vary based only on the workers' ages, whether they have individual or family coverage, what part of the country they live in, and whether they use tobacco — and older workers won't be able to be charged more than three times as much as younger ones.
( Also on POLITICO: GOP pushed on health care law)
Those changes will be helpful to small businesses with older workers and employees with health problems, but they also mean that small firms with younger, healthier workers will have to pay more than they used to. The new small-business plans will also have to cover the same set of minimum benefits that individual health plans will have to provide, including pediatric care and mental health and substance abuse services.
"If you can't use health [to set premiums] anymore, some people will move down and other people will move up," said Gary Claxton, director of the Health Care Marketplace Project at the Kaiser Family Foundation. "If you're a group of three 21-year-old men, you'll pay more, because a group of three 64-year-olds somewhere else will be paying less."
A lot of small businesses pushed off those changes this year by renewing their old, pre-Obamacare health plans early, extending them into next year. A common tactic, according to insurers and brokers, was to reset their plans with a Dec. 1 renewal date, which allowed them to hold onto the old benefits and rules as long as possible.
( WATCH: Kentucky residents react to Obamacare roll-out)
Next year, though, many of those small businesses will have to upgrade to health plans that comply with the new Obamacare rules. Unlike the canceled health insurance policies that largely hit this fall, those changes will be spread throughout the year.
But there will be a cluster of December renewals, industry officials say, and those small businesses will get the first look at their new premiums in October — right at the height of an election that's increasingly being framed as a referendum on the impact of Obamacare.
"You're going to have Joe the Plumber times a thousand around the country saying, 'I got screwed,'" said a health insurance industry official who asked not to be identified in order to speak candidly.
( PHOTOS: 25 unforgettable Obamacare quotes)
That could be a big political problem for the Obama administration, which has taken pains to present the law as a badly needed source of relief for small businesses. It sets up health insurance marketplaces for small businesses, called SHOP exchanges, around the country to provide them with more choices and better bargaining clout, and it provides tax credits for the smallest firms.
The issue is too far down the road to get a lot of attention from the administration now, since it has plenty of more immediate concerns, especially with the start of Obamacare coverage Jan. 1 and the need to make sure no one has a gap in coverage.
But an administration official said the Obama team will be watching the small-business situation closely as the time for those renewals approaches. "I think that's something we're going to take a hard look at and see if there are things that can be tweaked" if there is a lot of disruption, the official said.


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Painted Clowns
Painted Clowns
I'm drinking at a bar called the Dirty Horse on Hollywood Boulevard. Well, that's not the real name but I never got a look at the sign and that name seems right.
It fits the place, with its plastic pitchers of beer, painted clowns on black velvet, bowls of peanuts and the fast talking, baseball hat wearing guy at the end of the bar who clutches a clipboard and swears he can hook you up with tickets to a taping of "Yes, Dear."
"Better be nice to me," he says, swishing back a double shot of smug. "These Leno tickets go fast."
That's the nature of the place, a bar - where as you can probably imagine - a half-pretty girl in a three-quarters dark room gets served a pretty stiff drink. And the drinks are cheap. I'm drinking martinis for the simple reason that they work fast and I'm on a bit of schedule. I've been on the road working for all but four days of the past six weeks and I'm wound up tight. I keep thinking about my perpetually overheating Taurus, the way the mechanic's gloved hand slowly loosens the radiator cap, lets the steam out.
At some point, the line between Mickey Rourke and me blurs. I'm buying drinks for everyone in my section of the now crowded bar. "For all my friends!" I slur. I spill the contents of my purse onto the floor, lip gloss, receipts, coins. By the end of the night, I have no cash, none. I know this because the next day I go to put a coin in the meter and notice I have not one cent to call my own.
In the interest of making sure the cliché train doesn't miss a single stop, I make out with my ex-boyfriend, who is my designated driver and seated on the stool next to mine. It is later reported to me that without warning, I burst into tears and had an impassioned discussion about not much in said ex's ear.
Hold that thought.
Several months before the Dirty Horse, I was out with a guy my girlfriend dubbed Sexy Pete. Pete's in the music industry, dresses well, appears to take his workout regime very seriously and would never let you pay for dinner. Sexy Pete has been around. Normally, I'd never go out with a guy who exudes more sex appeal that mensch appeal, but my friend talked me into it.
"Now that you're 30,things are different. In your 30's, you don't worry so much. You just have fun," she explained.
Not to shock you, but it turns out Sexy Pete just "wasn't into a relationship right now." Still, we went out a couple times before that last date, which ended up with me back at his place, very late at night. We talked on his couch. It got late, then early. He fell asleep and I was stuck there, not knowing whether to extricate myself from Sexy Pete's sleepy grip or stay.
I thought to myself, "I'm in the apartment of a guy who couldn't care less about me. He barely speaks. He has no interest in a relationship; a sentiment I finally understand has no hidden meaning for men. This is about to get really sad if I don't leave now."
Out I went. Pete, with all the enthusiasm of a catatonic patient at a hospital square dance, muttered, "Don't leave."
The door was already half shut and it closed. I was out on an unfamiliar street in last night's boots and skirt. I spotted my car in the harsh light of early morning and the old Taurus had a brand new ticket.
This is what I call a Karma Ticket, the kind you get when you are where you shouldn't be. It never fails. You may also be familiar with the Nobility Ticket, the kind you get when you couldn't move your car because you were working and didn't want to lose your flow, listening to a friend discuss her divorce or otherwise doing good in the world. You feel good when you pay these and almost want to write in the memo line of your check, "Fee for being such a good person."
Because I'm 30, I don't cram the Karma Ticket in the glove compartment and forget about it until it doubles. I pay it.
Now back to painted clowns.
I wake up after my evening at the Dark Horse.
In my 20's, I would have had a series of concerns, sort of a self-administered shame questionnaire: Why did I do that? Should I still be dating that ex? What does it all mean? Why do I have to be such a jackass?
It's about slack now. Just like my friend predicted, I don't worry so much. I'm old enough to know what it costs to get wrapped up with a guy like Sexy Pete, which doesn't mean I don't get close, but it's three dates and out. I don't need to interpret what's wrong with him or with me. I just move on with the mollifying impact of slack easing the way.
I call the ex and we go over the highlights of the Dark Horse. It was the most fun I've had in a long time.
Here's the thing, if you spend the night where you shouldn't or get crazy on martinis once a year, there's no need to judge yourself. When it comes down to it, a few painted clowns doesn't make your life a circus.


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curse 241 – the connection
stevesabella The Artists Curse 0 Minutes
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Published by stevesabella
Steve Sabella is an award-winning artist and author based in Berlin. He holds an MA in photographic studies from the University of Westminster (London), and an additional MA in art business from Sotheby's Institute of Art (London). His first monograph, published by Hatje Cantz and the Akademie der Künste (Berlin), spans almost twenty years of his art. Sabella has exhibited internationally, and his work is held in several museums, institutions, and private collections. His life and art practice have also been the subject of several documentaries. For a full biography see - https://theartistscurse.com/contact/ View all posts by stevesabella


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Report: New Florida laws hurt minority vote
ORLANDO, Fla. A new reports shows changes in Florida's voting laws disproportionately affected minority voters during campaign 2012, CBS Radio News correspondent Peter King reports.
The University of Florida report says the cutback of early voting days disproportionately affected African Americans, who tend to vote early. Politics professor Daniel Smith says that led to long lines "disproportionately filled with racial and ethnic minorities" on Election Day.
Attorney Lee Rowland of New York University's Brennan Center for Justice also thought the new law was more political than practical.
"The incredibly long lines we saw in Florida were part of the legacy of the movement to restrict voting," she said.
Rowland says Florida lawmakers now have the chance to turn the page. "The Florida legislature's actions didn't just harm the voters of Florida, but distinctly made Florida a national laughing stock," she said.
Republican Gov. Rick Scott originally defended the GOP-backed law, but lines on Election Day gave ammunition to critics and comedians.
Now, Scott says he wants to restore those early voting days. He also wants more flexibility and a shorter ballot, which is what his opponents have demanded all along.


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10 May 2013 at 10.59am | Comment on this article
The young musicians of the Southbank Sinfonia recently had the chance to experience what it's like to perform alongside The Royal Opera and Royal Ballet.
Led by Royal Opera House conductors Barry Wordsworth and Paul Wynne Griffiths, the orchestra was coached through some of the best-known works in the opera and ballet repertory.
The Southbank Sinfonia is a leading orchestral academy, based in London, designed to give young musicians a springboard into the profession. Their visit to the Royal Opera House was part of Side by Side, a skills development programme that includes coaching sessions, mock auditions and a variety of performance opportunities. The orchestra is one of the Royal Opera House's partner organizations, alongside the BBC and the National Opera Studio.
'Everything about the ROH is grand,' said French Horn player Letty Stott. 'From the weird and wonderful sets to the view from the pit stretching way up to the balconies and the breadth of the musical repertory.'
The day concluded with a performance that featured members of The Royal Ballet and the Jette Parker Young Artists Programme.
'To perform with live musicians as well as witness the communication between conductor Barry Wordsworth and the dancers was very special,' continued Letty. 'A fusion of the finest singers, dancers and musicians is hard to come by, and I feel privileged to have been given a glimpse. For me, this is what is so unique about the ROH and why it deserves its grand reputation.'
Conductor Paul Wynne Griffiths emphasized the importance of the Side by Side programme in the development of young musicians:
'To be confined to a theatre pit for either opera or ballet is probably new for the players, and we at ROH enjoy introducing them to and guiding them through the experience.'
Forthcoming events at the Royal Opera House featuring the musicians of the Southbank Sinfonia include the Peter Hulsen Orchestral Song Award on Tuesday 14 May. Members of the orchestra also regularly take part in our free lunchtime recitals.


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Arlington, Virginia (CNN) -- Jordan Turner looks down at the scrap paper on the table in front of him.
The instructions sound simple enough: On one side, write a negative word associated with grief; on the other, a positive word.
Words have always come easily to the lanky 15-year-old, who hours earlier walked into a Washington-area hotel conference room full of unfamiliar faces and easily fell into conversation with teens and adults alike.
"Where are you from?" asks one teen.
Tacoma, Washington, he says.
"You been here before?" another asks.
No. This is my first time.
Nobody asks Jordan the next question, the one that would explain why he's in this room with more than two dozen teens about his age.
Nobody has to ask. They all know. Not the details, necessarily. But they know the reason: Somebody in the military -- a father, a mother, a brother or a sister -- is dead.
That is, after all, the only reason any of them are here at grief camp.
For some, it's the first time they'll openly talk about what happened -- the first time they'll feel safe enough to admit they feel helpless, alone in their pain. For others, it will be a second, third, fourth ... even a seventh time.
Sitting in this group, Jordan stares at the blank piece of scrap paper: How do you sum up grief in one word?
Others around the room are struggling, too.
At a nearby table, a teenage boy plays with a pen, thinking of a word that explains how he feels about his father's death in Balad, Iraq, how it forced him to grow up fast. Across the room, a girl looks up at the ceiling, trying to find a word that describes her feelings about how her father was killed six months earlier in a roadside bomb blast in Afghanistan.
Slowly, in blue ink, Jordan writes: FRUSTRATED.
That word, he will say later, captures everything about the questions he still has more than four months after a rocket struck his brother, Army Pfc. Neil Turner, in the chest.
The other half of the assignment is more painful, more problematic.
What was positive about what happened to Neil, Jordan thought. What good came out of his death?
New generation, stark reality
These teens have never really known a world without a war on terror.
They were too young to understand what it meant when hijacked planes smashed into the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and a Pennsylvania field on a clear September day in 2001.
They have grown up with cycles of long deployments that sent parents and siblings repeatedly off to war.
They are part of a new generation, living with a stark reality: Nearly 6,500 military personnel have been killed in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Home and Away: Iraq and Afghanistan war casualties
Roughly 5,000 children have lost a parent, and more than 5,200 have lost a sibling, according to estimates.
The youngest will grow up only knowing their lost loved one through stories told by family and friends; the older ones will try to come to terms with their loss while coming of age, navigating that awkward period between childhood and adulthood.
For Jordan and other first-timers at grief camp, such a loss has forever altered a time in their lives when they should be looking forward to the possibilities rather than looking back at what could have been.
Every year, the nonprofit Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors brings together hundreds of children of fallen service members to attend the Good Grief Camp. The camp coincides with TAPS' National Military Survivor Seminar for spouses and parents.
This year, more than 2,000 people, including 500 children, are in attendance. Among them are 120 teens between the ages of 13 and 19, broken into age groups such as the one Jordan is attending.
Each child and teen at the camp is paired with an adult mentor, primarily active-duty service members who can provide an ear and a shoulder.
In this environment, Jordan and the others will find a kinship among a group no one ever wants to belong to -- and one that is growing in its ranks.
"So why are you all here?" asks Vicki Jay, a counselor who will spend four days coaxing and cajoling Jordan's group through lessons aimed at constructively coping with loss.
"Fun," yells one 16-year-old boy.
Some of the teens giggle.
"Get out of school for the week," says another.
More teens giggle.
OK, OK, other than to get out of school, Jay asks.
Therapy, says one. New friendships, says another.
Jordan sits quietly. So do 15-year-old Ashlyn McCain and 16-year-old Tyler Gandy, also first-timers.
None of them have any idea what to say. They could say they were forced to go, that their mothers signed them up and that they really don't want to be here.
But that's not what you say when you're a teenager in unfamiliar surroundings. What you say is absolutely nothing.
Then comes the answer from one of the veterans of the group, a slight, 15-year-old blonde from Killeen, Texas, who talks loud and laughs louder.
"It helps you a lot, knowing you're not alone. I try to tell a lot of people about it. I want people to know about him," Hannah Tjaden says of her dad. "They just look at me weird. They don't really listen. Here we can share, so we don't punch a wall or something."
Anger is something Hannah knows a little bit about.
Her 48-year-old father, Army Sgt. 1st Class Christoffer Tjaden, died in January 2009 at Fort Hood, Texas, of complications from a traumatic brain injury he received in Iraq during a roadside bomb blast in 2006.
After he returned from Iraq, she was mad at him. He wasn't the same dad. She knew he suffered from a brain injury, though as a young girl she didn't really understand it. So she told people he died of a heart attack.
Only after his death did she really learn about TBI. It changed the way she felt, and she only wished she could have told him while he was alive.
Hannah's frank answer shifts the tone in the room.
"It gets better with time," says one teen, reflecting on lessons learned at an earlier camp.
"Don't keep it bottled up," says another.
'Just be present'
Air Force Tech Sgt. Rosie Smoots, 36, had reservations even as she volunteered as a mentor at grief camp. She wasn't sure what she was getting herself into with the four-day commitment.
She had heard about it from a comrade, who talked excitedly about the time spent with the children of fallen military service members.
Smoots liked what she heard, but she wasn't sure what she could offer. She had been exposed to death and grief, but not like this -- not with a child of a fallen soldier.
"Just be present," she was advised during a training session for prospective mentors. "Be there."
Be present. What did that really mean?
Teens in the group who'd been here before were paired with their previous mentors. Others were paired with mentors because of shared backgrounds or the nature of their loss. A handful of first-timers got to choose their mentor at the start of camp.
"Want to be my mentor?" Jordan asked Air Force Tech Sgt. Lesette Fraser, a 31-year-old computer expert from Atlanta.
The two had fallen into an easy conversation over an icebreaker game of Jenga and then later Uno. Both, it turned out, were gear heads with a passion for computers.
On the other side of the room, Army Staff Sgt. Lauren Veronie of Willis, Texas, surveyed Tyler, whose dark eyes and hair hinted at his Samoan heritage.
Veronie, 27, played the euphonium, a hornlike instrument that sort of resembles a tuba, in the Army Field Band. She had heard one of the teens was in band, and she thought their mutual interest might be a good, initial connection.
"Are you in band?" she asked.
Tyler's answer: yes. He played the oboe and the clarinet.
The two clicked.
Then there was Ashlyn, whose wide eyes and wider smile belied the pain underneath. She didn't have a mentor.
"Is there anybody who does not have a mentee?" one of the group leaders yelled over the din of chattering teens.
Rosie Smoots, the reluctant first-time mentor, raised her hand.
To an outsider, the two couldn't have been more different.
Smoots is black. Ashlyn is white.
Smoots lives in the nation's capital, while Ashlyn lives in rural North Pole, Alaska. Ashlyn wants to learn to moose hunt, while Smoots has only seen a moose on television.
But there was more: Smoots had never lost somebody close in combat; Ashlyn's father -- Sgt. 1st Class Johnathan McCain -- was killed in a roadside bomb blast in southern Afghanistan's volatile Kandahar province.
What could they possibly have to say to each other?
The moment everything changed
After everyone is paired up, Jay tells the teens to identify themselves and let the group know who they're here to honor.
Ashlyn and Jordan shift uncomfortably in their chairs, while Tyler studies the faces in the room.
The most veteran of the group, 16-year-old Billy Ruocco of Newbury, Massachusetts, goes first. It's his seventh year, and he's here because of his father -- Marine Maj. John Ruocco.
He doesn't tell the group what most returning teens and mentors already know -- that his father took his own life in 2005 after coming home from Iraq. It was the same deployment that claimed the life of his fellow helicopter pilot, Lt. Col. David Greene -- the father of Billy's good friend, 16-year-old Wes Greene of Branford, Connecticut.
Wes is next. It's his fifth year at the camp. His father was killed in July 2004 when an insurgent got off a "one in a million shot" and hit the Cobra pilot in the head while he was providing aid to troops caught up in a firefight in Ramadi, Iraq.
Billy and Wes didn't know each other when their fathers flew together. It was a friendship borne of grief; it grew out of a passion for sports, jokes and girls.
They were united by other things, too. Neither had a father to teach them to drive, to shave. For that, they turned to male relatives, friends and the Internet.
Wes says he learned to tie a tie through instructions he found online, while Billy turned to his brother and friends for advice about girls.
In the hotel conference room, the boys' easy banter and self-confidence catch the attention of Ashlyn. She's envious.
When it's her turn, Ashlyn identifies herself and tells the group she's here because her dad was killed on November 13. She doesn't tell them the rest of the story, the one she will later share with Smoots.
It was a cold Sunday in Alaska when Ashlyn opened the front door to two men in uniform.
Her mom, Leanne, was upstairs on the computer, waiting for her husband to log on and chat from his Afghan outpost, when she caught a glimpse out the window of the two men heading toward their house.
She called to Ashlyn not to open the door. But it was too late. The teen swung the door open -- and knew instantly why the men were there.
"There's only one reason two men in uniform come to your door," Ashlyn says.
It was the death notification.
In that moment everything changed. There was her life before her dad was killed, and the one that came after.
"It's never going to be the same," she says, blinking back tears.
Ashlyn dreams of being an actress, maybe taking to the stage as Belle in the musical adaptation of Disney's "Beauty and the Beast."
"I love the character," she says. "She doesn't judge. She accepted the Beast. She loved him even though he looked like a Beast."
Ashlyn was supposed to see the musical with her mother and other siblings. Then her father was killed.
The first day she returned to school after her father's funeral was hard.
"I walked down the hallway and all I heard was people whispering 'That's the girl whose dad died.' 'That's the girl whose dad got killed,' " she recalls.
Ashlyn says she's OK. At least, that's what she tells people. But really, she's not.
Prodded, she will admit she slips into character for the tough moments, acting like the girl before -- the one who never knew the constant, hollow ache brought about by a father killed in combat, by a dad who was never coming home.
That character, that girl, smiles and says everything is OK.
Ashlyn watches Billy and Wes, and wonders: Will I ever be able to be like that again?
The next day, she and Smoots purposely take seats next to the boys.
'It's a sign'
A sweltering sun is baking Washington as Tyler and his mentor, Veronie, walk through the National Mall.
It's Memorial Day weekend, and tourists pack the sidewalks from one end of the Mall to the other. Some mill around the Lincoln Memorial, while others visit war monuments or museums.
It's outing day at camp, and the teens are in need of a break after a day and a half inside a hotel conference room doing "grief work."
But there's a catch. As part of the trip, the teens are to take three pictures of something, anything that captures their journey with grief.
There isn't much at the National Mall that Tyler hasn't seen.
Every year, twice a year, since his father died in Balad in 2010, the teen has made the trip with his mother and brothers to pay respect to his dad, Army Staff Sgt. Loleni W. Gandy, who is buried at Arlington National Cemetery.
The trips, which are made on the anniversary of Gandy's death and his birthday, stem from the family's Samoan heritage -- a culture steeped in the celebration of the bonds of family.
Tyler isn't sure what to do with the assignment. He doesn't want to talk about his dad.
"I don't really know what happened to him," Tyler says, sitting in an air-conditioned museum cafe.
There were conflicting stories.
First, the family was told he died alone in his room of an unknown medical issue. Then, they were told he died of a heart attack, and they received letters from comrades who said they were with him at the time.
"You want to say, 'Which is it?' " Tyler says, the frustration in his voice apparent. "You don't know what to believe."
Tyler is looking forward to college, to becoming a doctor who specializes in research -- not the bloody "surgery stuff." And he has it all planned out: When he goes to college, he wants to buy his own place and move his mother in with him. It isn't ideal, he admits. But he sees it as his duty.
He doesn't believe his mother will remarry. When his parents married, it was for life and longer, he says.
"I'm not sad for my dad. My family is very religious. We believe he is in a better place," Tyler says.
Later, though, he will admit to an overwhelming sense of sadness. He will talk about growing up fast so he could help his mother with chores around the house, with paperwork.
He won't share any of this with the other teens. But in Veronie, Tyler has found a confidante, somebody to share the hard moments he won't discuss in public, that he won't tell his mother or brothers for fear it will upset them.
And in Veronie, he found somebody to have fun with.
At the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History's bug exhibit, Tyler and Veronie squeal over a giant beetle gnawing on a slice of apple. They laugh as they hold a fuzzy, green caterpillar that twists and turns in the palm of their hands.
Later, inside the Butterfly Pavilion, Tyler studies the delicate creatures.
There's something about them, about their color, their wingspan that catches his attention. They're just, well, so peaceful.
Then, as Tyler raises his camera to take a picture of a monarch resting on a flower, a brilliant blue butterfly lands on his finger.
It's a quiet moment for the teen, who studies the delicate creature perched on his left index finger.
And just as suddenly as it landed, the butterfly is gone.
Veronie snaps a photo, capturing the moment. Only later would the two realize she had taken a picture that captured part of Tyler's journey with grief.
Later, as Tyler is reunited with his mother, Veronie shares the photo with her.
"See, there's Dad," she tells her son, her eyes filling with tears.
Hating 'I'm sorry'
Marine Lt. Col. Matthew Sterni has been paired with Billy Ruocco every year at camp since 2007 after spotting the familiar last name on a name tag.
It's not a common one. Could this be the child of Marine Maj. John Ruocco? The same Ruocco he had flown with? The answer: yes.
It was that connection that saw Sterni, 41, able to share with Billy stories of Ruocco's selflessness and heroism in Iraq, flying into hot zones to aid troops under fire.
After so many years, there are few surprises between Sterni and Billy about what happened and what it did to the boy who grappled with the stigma of suicide.
Today, at grief camp, the two talk about Billy's desire to go to college, perhaps a military academy. They talk about Billy's prowess in lacrosse.
Billy returns again and again to the camp, he says, because in this room, among this group, he is not alone. He has his mentor, and his longtime friend Wes.
Billy and Wes don't overtly reach out to newcomers. Sure, they talk with first-timers. But they don't pry -- unless someone wants to open up.
"We all know why we're here," Billy says.
Even now, years later, the two teens struggle with their fathers' deaths.
"I hate it when people find out about my dad and they say, 'I'm sorry.' You want to ask, 'Why are you sorry?' " Wes says.
What he would rather hear, Wes says, is something along the lines of, "Thank you for your father's sacrifice."
It's a sentiment that is echoed through the room.
Since Ashlyn's father was killed, she admits to pulling away from friends, especially those who don't know what to say. Or those, she says, who say the wrong thing: I know what you're going through.
"How could they know?" she asks. "Was their dad killed in Afghanistan?"
She also hates it when people say, "I'm sorry." "You can't respond to that. What do you say to that?"
When she hears of Wes' preferred condolence, she breaks into a wide smile -- an affirmation that somebody here knows what she's talking about.
On the last day of camp, in a huge ballroom, the teens and other children are reunited with their families for the closing event -- a slide show.
There are tears and smiles, crying and laughter as photos of loved ones flash across the screen.
They are snapshots of life: weddings, anniversaries and births. They are photos of whole families, before death left a gaping hole.
Jordan sits with his mentor across the room from his two brothers, his mother and his father, waiting for Neil's picture.
The last time the family saw Neil was a month before his death. He was home on a two-week leave, an R&R break given to every soldier in the midst of a 12-month deployment in Afghanistan.
It was Thanksgiving, and the family was whole.
They said goodbye on December 7, putting Neil on a plane for the journey back to an outpost near the Pakistan border.
His father, Leland, tried to talk with his eldest son about what he had seen, what he experienced in Afghanistan. But Neil refused to discuss it.
Only later, at the end of grief camp, will Leland learn Neil shared stories of violence, of a running gunbattle that lasted hours, with 19-year-old Max.
"He didn't want you to worry," Max will gently tell his father.
Max got word of Neil's killing from his father while working at a computer and video game store, where he was earning money for college.
Jordan and his younger brother, Tucker, were home from school when soldiers showed up at the door.
After Neil's death, Max withdrew, saying little. ("I didn't want to impose myself on other people," he explains.) He quit his job, a place he says will forever remind him of Neil's death.
Jordan, the once talkative teen, also became quiet.
Neither wanted to go to camp when they learned their mother signed them up. They didn't know she asked Neil's commanders to let his squad leader return home to mentor one of her sons.
When the Army granted the request, it was decided the squad leader would be paired with Max, the oldest. The sergeant also spent time with Jordan and the rest of the family, offering precious details of Neil's life in a faraway land.
Jordan tries not to cry in front of his mom and dad; he says he doesn't want to upset them.
Even now, watching the slide show in this hotel ballroom, with this group of people, he refuses to let go as Neil's picture appears on the screen. The tears will come later during what he calls "odd moments" -- like when he hears his mother tell strangers about what happened.
He still doesn't understand everything about Neil's death, which the military calls a "training accident."
Neil was at his outpost in Afghanistan, standing in front of a comrade showing him how to use a rocket launcher, when the soldier accidentally armed it and fired, hitting Neil in the chest.
The soldier has been charged in connection with Neil's death, and the case is making its way through the military judicial system.
Even when it is over, Jordan isn't sure he'll have all the answers he wants. But he might already have some of the ones he needs.
Earlier in camp, Jordan struggled to come up with a positive word about grief.
As the assignment was made, Vicki Jay, the grief counselor, took a huge sheet of construction paper and ordered the group to tear it into smaller pieces so everyone had something to write on.
On one side, she told them to write a negative word associated with grief. On the other, a positive word.
After writing "FRUSTRATED," Jordan flipped the scrap over and stared at the blank side for a long time before writing "Blessed." He quickly crossed it out. Then he wrote it again.
He didn't understand the assignment, why he had to come up with these words.
But he did believe he was blessed -- blessed to have known and loved his brother.
He and his brothers are blessed in another way, too. Out of the devastating loss, there has been something unexpected. The survivors benefits, the lump sum paid to families of fallen troops, ensures that Jordan, Max and Tucker can go to college.
"It's a terrible way to learn you are going to college," Jordan says.
After everybody in Jordan's group finished writing down their words, Jay had the group reassemble the torn pieces and then tape them together.
Jordan studied the reassembled paper and looked at his mentor, Lesette Fraser, quizzically.
The tech sergeant leaned in: "No matter how hard you try to put it back together, it's always going to look different than it was."
Jordan understood. It was always going to be different now.
The debrief
For the teens and their families, the end of the slide show marks the end of camp. The mentors, though, stay behind for one last meeting.
Smoots, Ashlyn's mentor, sits in a room with the other adults, drained. She had lost sleep during the camp, tossing and turning at night as she thought about Ashlyn. She prayed, asking for guidance for the right words to say.
Fraser is quiet, too. She thinks about Jordan, who pledged to stay in touch and swore he would return to camp next year only if she did.
"What you did this weekend was important," Jay says gently. "These kids are going to be my age one day, talking about what you did for them."
One by one, the mentors share what they learned, what they experienced.
Veronie thinks of Tyler. And then she thinks of her brother in the Army, serving in Iraq. She had never deployed to a war zone, though she had played her euphonium for the families and in the communities of fallen soldiers.
"I feel so much more connected, so much more aware of the sacrifice," she says.
Smoots opens her mouth to speak and is overtaken by sobs. "I'm sorry, I can't," she says.
Urged on by the group, she starts again.
It was the night of the "bash," a huge party for those at the grief camp -- complete with music, dancing, an obstacle course, a cupcake decorating contest and tossing around footballs.
Ashlyn, Smoots says, raced through the obstacle course with her older sister.
"She was so happy. She was laughing, really laughing. And I stood there watching her," she says.
"All I could think is that if I could freeze-frame it in my mind, that's the moment I want to remember. It was almost like she forgot for a minute what brought her here. She just got to be a kid."


text:
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If you can spread this info among gliding enthusiasts in your countries it will surely help the idea.
Don't delay send your support today.


text:
Phillies manager Charlie Manuel had his first press conference since the season ended today at Citizens Bank Park, hitting on a number of topics. Here is some of what he had to say:
On his weight loss: "I tried on some of my sports coats and they were big on me. They dwarfed me."
On the lineup: "When I look at our lineup, I hope I will be able to move my lineup around a little bit. I look at Polanco as a top of the lineup hitter in the two hole. He makes good contact, he puts the fat part of the bat on the ball as good as anybody on the team. He plays situational baseball and can move the runners. I look at Shane, and he's the type of hitter sometimes that gives us some options. He will hit seven, six somewhere down in there. If you look at the players who we picked up we have some depth … We always talk about giving Rollins and Utley and even Polanco a rest every now and then. It depends on who we have on the field. That will dictate the lineup. I'm excited about our bench. We have versatility and can do some things."
Adding Roy Halladay: "He's the best pitcher in baseball right now. Cliff Lee may be a tad behind him. Of course, it would have been nice to have Halladay, Lee, Hamels, I'd be looking good. I might be buying more expensive furniture than me and the missus have been buying lately. Baseball is baseball .. I have my own opinions and suggestions, but like everyone else, I have a boss. The Phillies, over the last 2 or 3 years, have made good decisions. You get into a situation where you have to make decisions. I trust them. What we got is what we will play with until we see something we need to improve on."
Did you campaign to keep Lee?: "I know what goes on and how things wind down. As far as that, I just voiced my opinion. Like I said, I'm not the guy making the final decision. At the same time, I look at it that I'm excited at our pitching staff going into this season. The pitching staff going into this season is a lot better than it was going into last year. That's an upgrade, so we're ready to go."
Adding to bench: "I think our bench is much better. I think we can do a lot more things. Castro is not a guy who hits for a high average. He's a contact hitter. He can handle the bat, he can bunt consistently, he can move the runners. He can play defense. When you put all those things together, our bench, we definitely got better. We got better in our backup catcher in Schneider. I like that acquisition, it's very good … Polanco is a very good third baseman, very adequate. It's a position that you need to have quick reaction. He's got that. I've seen him play there before. He should be real good. Our starting lineup and our offense should be much better."
On the bullpen: "Lidge and Madson will play a huge part in our bullpen. We have to get them back and get them 100 percent. We picked up two guys in Baez and Contreras and both of these guys I know. We have two guys if they're sore, or stiff or have a headache, they'll pitch and I know they'll pitch. They are mentally tough guys. They are not going to go to the trainer or the doctor. That makes me feel good. Both of them can pitch two innings and they will take the ball whenever I want to give it to them … We've got to get JC Romero and we can always use two lefthanders in this league. We have to get the bullpen stabilized coming out of spring training. We always have somebody [unexpected] who picks it up and does a pretty good job for us. That always happens and that can happen this year. I consider our bullpen very productive if we can get Lidge back.
On Halladay going deep into games: "I haven't talked to him at all. I left him a message at Christmas and told him he didn't have to call back if he was caught up in things. I don't need to talk to Haladay. I'm just going to give him the ball every five days and tell him to go get 'em … He likes to pitch. He likes to throw his game. He's my kind of pitcher."
On the World Series: "If you go back and look and followed us playing the Rockies and the Dodgers, we played real good. We didn't really play as good as we can against the Yankees. It might have been because of their bullpen and their pitching. We ran into a situation in the World Series with how it went, the Yankees were a well-balanced team with their offense. At the end, Rivera did what he's been doing all these years. We can play better and we can pitch better offensively and defensively. I felt like in the ones they beat us, they were like a step ahead of us. We were always chasing them and trying to catch up. They were always ahead of us … It was who got the breaks and they got the good breaks. We can beat them. At the end of the World Series last year when I talked to our team, I told them that I feel like we owe the Yankees one … They got us."
On the pitching staff: "Our pitching is really cleared up. We have six guys and with some of the guys we've invited. We will put Contreras in there to get him some length, but he will probably fall into the bullpen. We want to put him as a starter in spring training to build him up." Manuel said the team has about 8-9 potential starters heading into spring training, some will fall to the bullpen, others will go to the minors.
On J.A. Happ: "He should feel real good about himself. He sits right there in the rotation. He's going to pitch on a regular basis. He has to pitch himself out of that. He will have to hold his own … Last season was not a fluke. He was a big reason why we got there and won some games. He's going to be a big part of our rotation."
On Cole Hamels: "Scott Sheridan said Hamels has been working out very well this winter. He's been doing a lot of work. Going into spring training, we will definitely from my standpoint, get Cole in spring training to catch his curveball earlier and do more with it. He can throw a curveball. Consistency is the biggest thing with it. I've always told him, 'I used to tell you to throw more curveballs. You used to get by' … I didn't really push him. If he gets more consistent, he'll get lefthanded hitters out better. That will make his changeup and his fastball better when he comes inside. Lefthanded hitters have good success off him. That's one of the big things about his pitching. The big thing is he has to improve his curveball. It doesn't matter to me if it's his curveball or if he comes up with a slider."
On the winter: "I played a lot of golf, did some fishing. Kept to myself … After about a week you want to come back to the ballpark. I was ready to start the season. My winter, I enjoyed it. At the same time, I'm very anxious to get back to work to get the season started."
On the Yankees: "We can play with the Yankees. We could have beaten the Yankees but we didn't … That give us more determination and everything. We definitely want to get back to the World Series. I know that. I know we want to go back to the World Series and win it. It's hard to go two years in a row to win the World Series. We got there but didn't get it done. This year, we're going to key on that. We're going to keep our same philosophy."
On his health and weight loss: "I feel very good. I worked out at Golds Gym in Winter Haven. I used to spend an hour and a half or two hours a day, on the treadmill, the bike. I would do weights, a lot of repetition instead of heavy weights. I feel very good. I feel a lot better than I did when I weighed 286. I looked at a picture and my stomach was over my belt. I had a pretty big gut. I definitely have more energy, my knees feel a heck of a lot better. I can move quicker and still hit a golf ball pretty good too. The other day I weighed 228.
On talking to Cliff Lee after the trade: "Right after he was traded, I called him. He wanted to stay with us. He was definitely disappointed. He liked everything about us. He liked Philadelphia. He liked the fans. He liked our team. He said we had a good attitude and wanted to win. He didn't have nothing but good to say about us. It was real tough [call to make]."