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Shalini has combiner her knowledge of natural ingredients and formulas with the inspiration of a myriad of cultures (the sites, the sounds, the colors of Africa, Asia, Egypt and more) to create her own makeup line. It's called Global Goddess.
I'll be entirely honest. When I first received her products for review, I didn't have very high hopes. "Just another makeup artist line. Like the world needs that. " Uhm. The world does need Global Goddess. And by world, I mean your makeup bag.
To start with, I'm a sucker for good packaging. And this is some goooood packaging. It's gorgeous! The eye shadows and blushes come in black plastic cases, very lightweight & durable, with clear tops adorned with gold Egyptian-esque designs. The Cairo Eyes Liquid Eyeliner comes in an authentic(ish) kohl liner bottle. It's feminine and beautiful and adds a much-needed touch of the exotic to my makeup bag.
Superficiality aside, the products bring their own something special to the table. True standouts include: Chai Cheek Color My shade is Mirik, a lit-from-within peach that has amazing staying power. I-Define Eyeliner in India Ink .This sooty black pencil which goes on smooth, smudges perfectly, then lasts and lasts.The aforementioned Cairo Eyes Liquid Liner . I tried Nefertitti, an extremely wearable plum/mauve shade that magically works with every shade of eye shadow. The short, hard brush makes quick work out of applying the liquid liner.
Photo credit: GlobalGoddessBeauty.com; HomeShoppingNetwork.com


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Kellan Lutz Admits Nearly Being Shut Out of New Moon Premiere
- Photo: VAH/Fame Pictures1 of 8
- Photo: Lester Cohen/WireImage.com2 of 8
- Photo: Greg Tidwell/Pacific Coast News3 of 8
- Photo: Matt Sayles/Invision/AP4 of 8
- Photo: Matt Sayles/Invision/AP5 of 8
- Photo: Sara De Boer/Retna Ltd.6 of 8
- Photo: Sara De Boer/Retna Ltd.7 of 8
More Celeb News
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Kellan Lutz admits he "almost couldn't get into" the "New Moon" after-party at the Hammer Museum in Los Angeles Monday night.
A guard initially declined to let him and a friend in, he says.
"I'm like, 'I'm in the movie!'" Lutz, 24, says on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" Wednesday. "I know my hair is blonde right now."
See photos of Kellan Lutz before his New Moon after-party mishap
Even though he got dissed at the door, the actor -- who recently said he never dated AnnaLynne McCord -- says he has been getting plenty of attention lately as a result of starring in the hit film franchise.
"It's very surreal," Lutz says. "We live in this 'Twilight Zone' bubble in a way. It really hasn't set in. I try and get away. I don't change my life or anything like that, but I try and go away and treat myself."
Check out the love loves of the New Moon stars
It's not always successful.
During a recent spa outing, he says he was relaxing by himself -- naked -- in a spa when a guy walked up.
See Kellan Lutz with no shirt - and other hot boys of summer
"The guy is like, 'You're Kellan Lutz!'" Lutz recalls. "I'm like, 'Yeah.' He's like a big fan, big fan. [He's like], 'You do great work in "Twilight!" Can't wait to see the new movie!' "I'm like, 'Thanks, buddy!'"
The man continued to talk for 10 minutes even though Lutz was sitting in the spa naked.
The worse part, says Lutz: "They aren't that deep of spas."
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My Best mattieeees:
How does you do there?? Its Blair aka SplishSploshaRoo!! Hacking Mista Skittle Moosh page!! This dude is the shizz!! :D Hes also mine <3 Be jealous jello :P He ish my favourite person so ha! :) We luffles the wurd "luffles" XD Dont you go hurting my Skittle Mosh or il go Blair-Ninja on your butt!! :D
Ellozer! I am the fabbb ...Jack! I am Skittlez twin and i Loovvve him. But im Jelose of BLAIR cus Alex loves her so much. Moo. . He just goess on and on and on and on and on and.. Yeah you get the idea.. Anywayish i am hacking his page cus i want to and im his twinish. Lovveee Jackaroo!
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Real Name
Yoshihiro Tajiri
Date of Birth
September 29, 1970
Place of Birth
A big reason why Bobby Lashley was given the TNA World Heavyweight Championship this week is because he is viewed as a marketing asset. The company immediately sent out a press release to inform them that Lashley had become the new champion. TNA is touting his accomplishments as a collegiate athlete, military personnel, mixed martial arts and professional wrestling to the media.
June 20, 2014
While some are under the impression that he is simply portraying a character, Sgt Slaughter was once actually in the military, more precisely the Marine Corps. He even achieved the rank of Sargent during his tenure. That was how wrestling promoters came up with his gimmick and character.
February 15, 2014
TNA star Gunner served in the United States military during the Iraq War.
November 5, 2013
Yujiro Kushida, who regularly teams up with former TNA star Alex Shelley in New Japan, was mentored by former WWE star Tajiri early on in his career.
July 21, 2014
Since his company is folding and he is joining the Great Muta in Wrestle-1, there are talks that Tajiri could be making an appearance in TNA very soon, as the two companies have been working closely together nowadays. Tajiri still has some name value due to his stint in WWE, and he has a connection with characters like Rhyno, Bully Ray, Tommy Dreamer and Devon.
July 6, 2014
Earlier this week, Tajiri and the Great Muta had a joint press conference to announce that Wrestling New Classic, which was ran by Tajiri, was folding and that the performers would be joining Wrestle-1, which is owned by Muta. The move enables Wrestle-1 to have a much deeper roster, while making it easier for the former Wrestling New Classic guys to find immediate work.
June 24, 2014
With his contract status in limbo at the moment, Frankie Kazarian is heading over to Japan to work a match for the Great Muta and his new Wrestle-1 promotion. Kazarian will be teaming with Abyss, who is still under contract to TNA, in a tag team match against Muta and Tajiri, the former WWE star. The event will be taking place on May 4th.
April 23, 2014
Had things gone a different way, then wrestling fans might have never heard of Tajiri. The former WWE and ECW star had initially began training for a career in kickboxing, but changed to professional wrestling after watching several matches from Mexico.
January 20, 2014
Chris Benoit shocked the wrestling world when he was able to win the Royal Rumble and earned himself a shot at the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania. He was successfully able to eliminate the Big Show to win the match.
January 25, 2004
Under a cloud of controversy, Tajiri defeated Dr Wagner Jr to capture the CMLL Light Heavyweight Championship in Tokyo, Japan. However, the promotion in Mexico refuses to acknowledge this reign, as they did not give permission for the title change to happen.
July 19, 1996


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365 Film Challenge | Film #18: Like Crazy
It's a beautifully done film. Seriously. It's fairly simple, but these two actors (Anton Yelchin and Felicity Jones) take this love story and just really sell it. The musical tone of the film is wholly wonderful. And Jennifer Lawrence has a small role in it as well. Watch it.
Was not impressed with the pace and end but overall a good watch.
v______________________________v I love this movie


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meaning, as used in this article:
(a) "Basic public health services" means those services that are necessary to protect the health of the public. The three areas of basic public health services are communicable and reportable disease prevention and control, community health promotion and environmental health protection;
(b) "Bureau" means the bureau for public health in the department of health and human resources;
(c) "Combined local board of health" is one form of organization for a local board of health and means a board of health serving any two or more counties or any county or counties and one or more municipalities within or partially within the county or counties;
(d) "Commissioner" means the commissioner of the bureau for public health, who is the state health officer;
(e) "County board of health" is one form of organization for a local board of health and means a local board of health serving a single county;
(f) "Department" means the West Virginia department of health and human resources;
(g) "Director" or "director of health" means the state health officer. Administratively within the department, the bureau for public health through its commissioner carries out the public health functions of the department, unless otherwise assigned by the secretary;
(h) "Essential public health services" means the core public health activities necessary to promote health and prevent disease, injury and disability for the citizens of the state. The services include:
(1) Monitoring health status to identify community health problems;
(2) Diagnosing and investigating health problems and health hazards in the community;
(3) Informing, educating and empowering people about health issues;
(4) Mobilizing community partnerships to identify and solve health problems;
(5) Developing policies and plans that support individual and community health efforts;
(6) Enforcing laws and rules that protect health and ensure safety;
(7) Uniting people with needed personal health services and assuring the provision of health care when it is otherwise not available;
(8) Promoting a competent public health and personal health care workforce;
(9) Evaluating the effectiveness, accessibility and quality of personal and population-based health services; and
(10) Researching for new insights and innovative solutions to health problems;
(i) "Licensing boards" means those boards charged with regulating an occupation, business or profession and on which the commissioner serves as a member;
(j) "Local board of health," "local board" or "board" means a board of health serving one or more counties or one or more municipalities or a combination thereof;
(k) "Local health department" means the staff of the local board of health;
(l) "Local health officer" means the individual physician with a current West Virginia license to practice medicine who supervises and directs the activities of the local health department services, staff and facilities and is appointed by the local board of health with approval by the commissioner;
(m) "Municipal board of health" is one form of organization for a local board of health and means a board of health serving a single municipality;
(n) "Performance-based standards" means generally accepted, objective standards such as rules or guidelines against which public health performance can be measured;
(o) "Program plan" or "plan of operation" means the annual plan for each local board of health that must be submitted to the commissioner for approval;
(p) "Public water system" means any water supply or system which regularly supplies or offers to supply water for human consumption through pipes or other constructed conveyances, if serving at least an average of twenty-five individuals per day for at least sixty days per year, or which has at least fifteen service connections, and shall include: (1) Any collection, treatment, storage and distribution facilities under the control of the owner or operator of the system and used primarily in connection with the system; and (2) any collection or pretreatment storage facilities not under such control which are used primarily in connection with the system. A public water system does not include a system which meets all of the following conditions: (1) Which consists only of distribution and storage facilities (and does not have any collection and treatment facilities); (2) which obtains all of its water from, but is not owned or operated by, a public water system which otherwise meets the definition; (3) which does not sell water to any person; and (4) which is not a carrier conveying passengers in interstate commerce;
(q) "Secretary" means the secretary of the state department of health and human resources;
(r) "Service area" means the territorial jurisdiction of a local board of health;
(s) "State advisory council on public health" is the advisory body charged by this article with providing advice to the commissioner with respect to the provision of adequate public health services for all areas in the state;
(t) "State board of health" means, and refers to, the secretary, notwithstanding any other provision of this code to the contrary, whenever and wherever in this code there is a reference to the state board of health.


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Carnage on the Mountain
Every year in November, Carnage hosts a weekend of tabletop gaming. In 2014, the seventeenth such occasion, from the afternoon of Friday, November 7th, to the afternoon of Sunday the 9th, convention-goers gather at the Killington Grand Resort Hotel in Killington, Vermont, to play the best and newest in tabletop games, including board games, card games, miniatures, and role-playing games.
News and Developments
For the latest news on the upcoming Carnage, visit the News page. You can also follow us on Facebook, join the Carnage Lounge there, tweet @CarnageCon and maybe circle us over on Google+.
Rooms are currently available at the Killington Grand, both on-site and in adjacent condominium properties. To get the convention rate, you must contact Killington directly. Call 1-800-282-9955 and be sure to say you're with Carnage to book a room at the convention rate. Not specifying you're with Carnage or using their online reservation system will result in booking at a greater cost.


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Woodworker's Journal
John Brock: Faith is for church. Save it for religion. Your home improvement store is a for-profit, capitalist enterprise. Take a discerning eye and a full measure of skepticism with you to either establishment, but include a hand tape and a pair of leather work gloves when you go to the home improvement store. Trust, but verify, is the order of the day. Most of us know that two-by-sixes aren't, 3/4" plywood isn't, and wood studs are rarely straight. Keep in mind that the same unit of wood you are picking through has been picked through by dozens of other well-meaning DIY'ers, leaving the culls on top. BTW - If your hand tape looks new, take your receipt with you so you aren't asked to pay for it a second time.
Greg Williams: Take a tape measure and square, and hand select the boards.
Carol Reed: You may confidently have faith that the dimensions are nominal, meaning measure for actual measurements. Narrow and straight is something the woodworker does once the wood arrives in the shop. Plan quantities accordingly. This is normal no matter the source. That said, you will probably find the quality of wood from the borg to be less than from a lumberyard that serves cabinet shops.
("Borg" is a common online term for "large home improvement store." It derives from a fictional race of cyborgs on Star Trek that absorb everything in their path. - Editor )


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Picture in your mind the facilities management guy or gal in your building: Are you envisioning someone in a pair of overalls and a screwdriver tucked in the back pocket?
If so, who are you going to call when the rack density in the datacenter increases from 2 to 3 kilowatts per rack to 12 kW per rack thanks to IT technologies like virtualization and server consolidation?
If your facilities manager is the screwdriver-in-the-pocket type, don't be surprised when you're told, "You better shut some of these contraptions down!"
[ Green is not enough. IT's emerging challenge is to help businesses reduce energy usage as prices rise. Find out how IT can lead the charge in InfoWorld's special report. ]
Due to the realities of rising energy costs and new energy management systems, the traditional facilities manager is morphing into a tech-savvier operations role, one that is pushing both IT managers and facilities managers into a more consultative relationship. In some cases, facilities management is becoming part of IT.
At a recent Datacenter Users' Group meeting sponsored by Emerson Network Power, 62 percent of the 230 industry experts from Fortune 1000 companies said that collaboration between IT and facilities management has increased over the last 12 months.
Matt Kightlinger, director of solutions at Emerson, believes that driving this convergence is the need for energy efficiency to lead to lower costs. "It is forcing IT and [facilities management] to increase efficiencies from an operations perspective," he says.
But there's been a historic disconnect between IT and facilities, with each making decisions in isolation. "IT buys on performance from IT vendors, so they never get the actual [energy] bill at the end of the month," says David Cappuccio, a Gartner analyst. But the high cost of energy is pushing the two groups together. When the CFO asks IT and facilities about the IT energy budget, each side says the other department is responsible, and that's not an acceptable answer. "Suddenly, both sides are realizing that to create a more efficient infrastructure based on energy, they need to cooperate," he says.
The shift starts in the datacenter
The hot spot for this shift into tech is definitely the datacenter. That is where the business logic for combining IT and facilities management really comes on strong.
Typically, "facilities management" means taking care of the building systems, comfort systems, and power. But facilities management also takes care of the critical energy infrastructure that goes into the datacenter. And that means IT is at least heavily involved with facilities and, in some cases, applies IT techniques itself to managing the energy infrastructure.
The popularity of energy-saving virtualization technology is one reason IT is getting involved in energy infrastructure management. Here's why: The use of virtualization reduces the number of servers needed, decreasing overall energy consumption, but there's now more energy used per server and greater risk to the enterprise if any server fails, since several virtual servers will shut off when the physical server goes.


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Biagio's Osteria
- Address:
88 Ryder's Landing
Stratford, CT 06614Neighborhood:
- Cuisine:
ItalianPrice: $30 and under
Biagio's Osteria
- Dining Style: Casual Elegant
- Website: http://www.biagiososteria.com/
- Phone: 2033759071x
- Hours of Operation:
Lunch: Monday - Friday: 11:00am - 4:00pm; Dinner: Sunday - Friday: 4:00pm - 10:00pm, Saturday: 4:00pm - 11:00pm
- Payment Options: AMEX,Discover,MasterCard,Visa
- Cuisine: Italian
- Executive Chef: Biagio C. Barone
- Dress Code: Smart Casual
- Accepts Walk-Ins: Yes
- Additional Details: Chef's Table, Full Bar, Patio/Outdoor Dining, Private Room, Wheelchair Access, Wine, Wine Bar
- Catering: Please inquire for details.
- Private Party Facilities: Biagio's Osteria has an Exquisite dining venue with professional staff for your special occasion or private business event. A/V outlets and private wine room available as well. Have Chef Biagio create a special menu for your occasion.
- Private Party Contact: Biagio Barone 8773648370
A word from Biagio's Osteria
Rustic Southern Italian kitchen with strong influence from Tuscany. All professional staff with over 30 years experience.Continued
"It is most certainly a gourmet establishment with a menu from top to bottom that is exquisitely creative with tastes and flavors and choices that make selections so joyously difficult--and with a wine list to match food and pocketbook. Consider this the now best Italian restaurant in the state. Three cheers for Biagio the chef."
"Concealed jewel, but easily accessible off the parkway. Esteemed staff that goes about taking care of your every need, especially the maitre d'. Exceptional menu with meals that make you crave for more. The homemade pasta dishes are unequaled to any place in the state. This is an elite restaurant that I will entertain my family and my business clients at. Head chef will go above and beyond his means for satisfaction of customer."
"It is most certainly a gourmet establishment with a menu from top to bottom that is exquisitely creative with tastes and flavors and choices that make selections so joyously difficult--and with a wine list to match food and pocketbook. Consider this the now best Italian restaurant in the state. Three cheers for Biagio the chef."
"Concealed jewel, but easily accessible off the parkway. Esteemed staff that goes about taking care of your every need, especially the maitre d'. Exceptional menu with meals that make you crave for more. The homemade pasta dishes are unequaled to any place in the state. This is an elite restaurant that I will entertain my family and my business clients at. Head chef will go above and beyond his means for satisfaction of customer."
Foodspotting photosSee all photos
Awards voted by OpenTable diners
- Diners' Choice WinnerItalian
Biagio's Osteria - Best Restaurants in Stratford ›
Biagio's Osteria reviews from OpenTable diners
74 reviews since May 27, 2014
- Food4.6Service4.5
- Ambiance4.1Noise LevelModerate
special occasion (45)neighborhood gem (39)fit for foodies (38)romantic (27)notable wine list (22)good for groups (18)great for outdoor dining (13)great for lunch (12)kid-friendly (6)hot spot (6)late-night find (2)great for brunch (1)Show More
- Great PastaALH930VIPDined on 9/19/2014The pasta is made in house. Always a reliable spot for simple italian food. Heavy on the garlic/butter/cheese so request less.
- Great!OpenTable Diner Since 2014Dined on 9/19/2014Food was delicious; presentation beautiful! Service very attentive.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Wonderful restaurantLibrisDined on 9/13/2014Every single thing we had was wonderful. I had the osso bucco and took half of it home which I cannot wait to have for lunch today! They did not rush us. Waiter was great. Owner and chef came to the table to ask how everything was which is always a nice touch. We do not live close by but would certainly come again.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- TrI'd ItaliandaveDined on 9/13/2014Outstanding food and service that you would expect to pay much more for.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Worth the trip!qginVIPDined on 9/13/2014We met friends from CT there and it was a fantastic dinner! We will make the 45 minute trip again. Special attention from the time we came in the door on a busy Saturday night until our last drop of limoncello. The homemade pasta, the bread, the sauces were all delicious!Special Features:
- Great PlaceVeggiedinerDined on 9/10/2014We were a little late meeting friends and they were seated first. They were asked if they wanted a drink while they waited and were served bread with their delicious spread. Service was good, food creative and very good. Highly recommend. At the end of the meal they brought cookies and limoncello on the house!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Amazing food!OpenTable Diner Since 2014Dined on 9/5/2014The food was amazing, everyone in our group loved the food. The waiter also paired our wine well with our food choices. Portion size was enough that you could still have an appetizer or salad and not feel stuffed. Would definitely go back!Special Features:
- Best Service around, unique menuNOSaints21Dined on 8/30/2014Always unique items on the menu with super fresh ingredients. Osso Bucco is highly recommended, but I've never ordered anything I didn't like. We dine at Biagio's as much as possible. Clean restaurant and amazing service. Best neighborhood Italian around, hands down!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- BethanyBethanyDined on 8/23/2014Food and service exceptional. Highly recommend to anyone.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Shock and AwefoodiecriticDined on 8/16/2014My husband and I made a reservation at Biagio at the end of a 3 day trip. We had found our eats thus far to be just ok and not worth the money spent. From the moment we entered Biagio we were impressed with the service, attention to detail and genuineness of the staff. The menu was very inventive while still having typical classics. The presentations were artful and the food was one fresh delicious bite after another. When the check arrived we commented to each other that we had paid double for far less quality and service at other upscale Italian restaurants. Since we are out of towners we won't likely be returning to Biagio anytime soon and that is a tragedy. Go and Enjoy - you'll love it!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Always Great!VictoriaVIPDined on 8/12/2014Always had a wonderful meal here! Food and service are consistently stellar. Will return again.
- Amazing service and foodTotalfoodieVIPDined on 8/12/2014This restaurant is a gem! Perfectly fit for someone looking for an enjoyable meal and great service. The ambiance provides you with a Tuscany feel and an inviting warmth. From the savory delicious appetizers to the mouth watering desserts, this restaurant goes beyond your expectations! I am a foodie and love trying new places. I have eaten all over the world and I have to say this restaurant is on my top 5 in the world!!!! Highly recommend !!!!!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Excellent food and serviceAngie2000Dined on 8/9/2014First making reservation on line was so easy. It was great entering into a warm and friendly environment. The waiters and waitresses were very friendly, courteous and accommodating. The service between courses was very timely. Most importantly the food was good. The owner would stop by on occasions to make sure you were satisfied. I would not hesitate to dine there again.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- SpectacularnandmDined on 8/8/2014A must choice for spectacular dining on all levels...always a great meal...gracious upscale service without being stand off ish . Comprehensive wine selections. Be prepared to want to return often!Special Features:
- Passionate MenuFoodieDined on 8/4/2014Truly wonderful experience! The chef comes out and greets to check on his guests frequently. Best Ossobucco I ever had in my life. Try the home made pastas they are amazing...brings you back to Italy.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Dinner not acceptabledisappointedDined on 8/2/2014First it was a special occasion for my cousin. We ordered the Veal Chop, medium. It came out well done, dry and tastless. I do recommend your restaurant, I've been 6 times in two years. I would like two "free" dinners, but that would of taken too much time.of taken. Disappointed, my bill, was was $245.00 with a 20% tip still to the waiter, total bill was $295.00. I would like two "free" dinner or dinner on the house for my 4 people..out of courtesy. I am a regular loyal customer, would you please accommodate my request, as I am loyal, picked your restaurant, as it is in my top two restaurant that I frequent. I hope you can call me, or email me back. Please understand my honesty. Robert Secondi (203)430-0341 - my cell#Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Second time and still great.GaryDined on 8/2/2014It was our second visit in a month. My wife now labels it her favorite restaurant. Great food, great service, great price. They pay attention to you to ensure all is good with your dining experience.Special Features:
- ctdinerctdinerDined on 7/26/2014Wonderful dinner menu and selection. The food was wonderful and the service very good! Great place to sit back, enjoy a great meal and relax with friends. The timing of service was very good and we never felt rushed. A wonderful evening out...highly recommend!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- DisappointingspudgaryDined on 7/19/2014While the food TASTED great, the experience was not. We were greeted then left standing until another waiter asked if we were being helped. Only after asking our waiter if there were any specials was this information offered. Two of our dinners came with closed mussels, and when the new dinners came (after which our wives had almost finished theirs) I found another closed mussel. (I just set it aside since it was apparent the chef was too busy to check). Although the calamari appetizer was awesome, the smaller ones on our dinners were hard and rubbery. And even though when we reserved we indicated that we were celebrating a birthday and anniversary, not even a congratulation was offered. Very disappointing, we won't be back.
- Highly recommendedDJODinerDined on 7/19/2014We went to Biagio's Osteria because another place we were going to go to had closed. We were going to mini golf up thee road and wanted someplace close by. I am very glad we went. The food was excellent. The service very good. I had the veal meatballs on polenta as an appetizer which was delicious. We both had lobster ravioli as an entree. It was delicious. My only complaint, and it is very minor, is the bread. It was a hard crusted bread that tasted a bit burnt on the crust. I would have preferred a good Italian bread, especially to sop up the leftover sauce from the ravioli. Overall it was an excellent dinner and we will be back.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- cFoodDined on 7/18/2014The food was delicious! Better than most area restaurants, a hidden gem. We had 4 different entrées and all were superb. We will be back.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Good Food but .......RestaurantgalDined on 7/16/2014Very good food. It is Italian and of that type of cuisine we have an overload of restaurants in southern Connecticut but Biagio's is one restaurant that is memorable as far as quality and taste of food is concerned. House wine is not good in my opinion and this is my 4th time returning and trying different wine . If you go order a bottle their list is small but nice. The service was very slow. From the time the waiter took our order for a bottle of wine it was 45 minutes before we were asked about food choices. Small and cute place but if you are hungry tell the waiter and I am sure they will accomodate.Special Features:
- FantasticFoodieDined on 7/15/20145th time at Biagios, never disappoints! Fulvio the manager is the best, he made a great wine selection for us. Try the home made pastas, brought me back to my last trip in Italy.Special Features:
- The Real DealFoodLoverDined on 7/15/2014Ossobuco the best I ever had and the special salad with shaved brussles sprouts over a crispy risotto cake and parmesan olive oil dressing was AMAZING! The short rib appetizer WOW! Even on a bad day this place still rocks!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- A Hidden GemjpwildDined on 7/11/2014Have had multiple visits to this fantastic eatery. Appetizer portions are large enough to share - and we recommend doing so in order to try as many as possible! Unique twists on old favorites. Have yet to order dinner off the menu since the dinner specials are always so tempting. Convenient location, easy to get to and a great place to meet. Service is always outstanding. This has rapidly become our new go to spot whether it be for full meals or just appetizers and drinks.Special Features:
- BNewDined on 7/8/2014Biagio's is a wonderful restaurant, with incredible attention to detail. Presentation is outstanding, plenty of choices of types of food, and every dish is outstanding. It's always a pleasure to visit Biagio's.Special Features:
- excellentpkfromctDined on 7/7/2014A wonderful find. Food and service were exceptional. We will definitely return.I would recommend this to a friend.
- Great MealTrlfazzDined on 7/1/2014We got a gift certificate from a friend, and finally got to use it. We were seated immediately and given water and some bread soon after. I had the spinach crepes and my wife had a fig salad (a special) followed by the stuffed salmon and mushroom ravioli. All was excellent!! Great service, great atmosphere and awesome food. We will be back.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Hidden GemFLGalDined on 7/1/2014This may be a small restaurant hidden in a corner strip mall however it has a HUGE amount of flavors to offer in their foods. I used to go often when I lived in CT & now make sure I stop by at least once when I am back for a visit. Food & service are great!! Been around a long time!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- NEIGHBORHOOD GEMOpenTable Diner Since 2007Dined on 6/28/2014BIAGIO'S IS TUCKED INTO A SMALL PLAZA CALLED RYDER'S LANDING. YOU WOULD NEVER SUSPECT THAT SUCH DELICIOUS FOOD AND SUCH A GREAT PALCE TO EAT WOULD BE THERE. THE FOOD IS WONDERFUL AND THE SERVICE IS FRIENDLY AND HOSPITABLE. IT HAS BECOME A FAVORITE OF MINE. IT IS A LITTLE GEM!Special Features:
- What took me so long?DiningDiva1Dined on 6/24/2014I had heard many good things about this spot but never gave it a try. It dinwas a great surprise ! The service was very European & impeccable . The food was carefully prepared & presented. It was truly a taste of Italy. My only issue would be the tables for two were a bit cramped but everything else more than compensated. I look forward to returning soon!Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- first time thereMrWonderful61Dined on 6/21/2014tables were very close together felt like I was sitting with two other couples. Next time I would ask for a table in the patio room. Food overall was outstanding, but did have to wait a while to get a second drink. Would deffinately go back but I would make sure I was sitting elsewhere in the restaurant.I would recommend this to a friend.
- FoodOpenTable Diner Since 2014Dined on 6/21/2014Best meal I've had on two years. I even had leftovers.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Very good food, and a lovely waiterCTFoodieDined on 6/20/2014My husband and I tried Biagio's for the first time on a Friday night, our anniversary. The food was VERY good; warm bread with olive oil, balsamic, and grated cheese for dipping. Our waiter was kind and attentive. The Caesar salad came in a crispy, rolled tortilla, with a slice of prosciutto and tasty olives, very well presented. The sea bass was excellent! What I did not care for was our greeting. This was supposed to have been a special night. We arrived on time for our 7:30p reservation. Not only was our table not ready, the couple behind us, who had an 8p reservation were called ahead of us to be seated. When our table was finally ready, we were seated in the noisy, middle section of the restaurant. Not romantic.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- Great FoodOpenTable Diner Since 2009Dined on 6/16/2014This is the second time Ive been here, its a great place, great food prepared with careSpecial Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- I Always Get...GardenweaselVIPDined on 6/14/2014The same thing because it's just so delish-the cheese plate appetizer featuring 3 fresh styles of mozzarella (burratta!) & the orrechette with sausage & broccoli rabe. This is preceded by complementary hummus & bruschetta spread with their delicious bread. The atmosphere is a little old school, but I'd still recommend Biagio for excellent Italian food.Special Features:
- Terrific FindfoodisloveDined on 5/31/2014We had lived in area for several years and moved last year. For some reason missed this as an opportunity for terrific dining when we lived in the area, surprising given my husband's love of a great meal. We decided to drive up to meet friends and found Biagio's on Open Table. What a great spot to meet friends. Right off the Merritt but even more gratifying was the food and service. We all had terrific meals, the home made pastas, shrimp and salmon were all prepared and presented well. Service attentive but not overbearing or pretentious. My Italian mother who was an incredible cook and restaurateur would have approved. We will return often now that we have found such a great rendezvous spot.Special Features:
- The following 426 reviews are from the Biagio's Osteria reviews archive.
- Gourmet Delight!!sufishDined on 5/24/2014Outstanding food, service and ambiance. Everyone is extremely helpful and friendly. Thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.
- ConsistenthizzonerDined on 5/24/2014Quality of dining experience has been consistently good over several years. Food taste, preparation, portion size, presentation, menu choices, and table service are all better than average. Can get quite noisy here some evenings especially not nice in main dining area where tables are too close together. Would like a better (quality and variety) wine by-the-glass menu. Ownership cares about their customers. This place is worth seeking out. Don't miss desert.Special Features:
- OutstandingTsm2VIPDined on 5/11/2014Outstanding dinner. We had 2 fantastic meals there this weekend.Special Features:I would recommend this to a friend.


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Carry-Able-Computer - A way more awesome definition for laptop.
Are you looking at Poképorn on your CAC? That's nasty.
by TheGreatKhali April 04, 2011
1. v. An acronym for Computer Aided Conversation,to CAC is to pause in face to face conversation and turn to a computer for a solution to a problem or question. "CACing" can be seen in a positive light, as it can provide a convenient solution to a dispute, but can also be negative because of it's tendency to dissolve conversation as participants go from answering the question at hand to checking their e-mail.
"I have no idea where Bhutan is or what their GDP is...let's CAC it!"
by Ally Reeves and Turadg Aleahmad May 19, 2008


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In Response to Re: How do you enjoy Boston?: [QUOTE]Wait - how many of the people in this story listed as "Bostonians" were actually born and raised in Boston? Why do you have to be born and raised more »


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Midlife Crisis and Transformations
The term Midlife Crisis brings up many images. In America, it brings up deriding images of a person buying a red sports car, daydreams of flings, broken marriages and people acting as a child again.
In reality, a Midlife Crisis represents a deeper possibility for a person to become their dreams. However, those dreams are hard to realize within an un-supportive society and without clear personal understanding of the actual experience. People often end up hurting themselves in the process of trying to change. A person's life carries a lot of momentum from the past that tumbles them about heedlessly upon trying to change to be something new.
Midlife Crisis is an unfortunate label applied to those working through these transitional times of their life. So the first step to understanding this process is to understand what crisis is:
Crisis is a turning point when change must happen to prevent the break down of the former order of things. Crisis is not a time of trouble: unless doing nothing. Crisis is a time for transformation and opportunity.
The truth: Midlife Crisis is really a Midlife Transformation.
The reason I became a healer evolved from the fact few people truly understand and support Midlife Transformations. As a result of my own experience and helping others, I have opened up a healing practice to help guide people within their own midlife transformation process.
Some basic observations about Midlife Transformations.
- It's a time of change. Many people hurt themselves and those they love by resisting change. Holding onto the past will tear a person and family apart during a time of change.Often times the pain of resisting change causes people to revert back to old habits. A midlife crisis is not a sure thing. Human nature desiring comfort and the social pressure resisting change are powerful forces shaping a person's life. The majority of people going through midlife crisis actually fail for these and other reasons.Mid life transformation can be one of the most beautiful and amazing times in a person's life when flowing with change and the support of others. Or it can be a nightmare of confusion mixed to the actions of people actively hindering your path. When facing such a nightmare most people embrace past comforts to resist the transformation and actually re-transform back into an image of their old life.The direction of change isn't always forward, A MidLife Crisis is often experienced stumbling backwards.
- A time to experiment with new perspectives. Since this represents a changing of life. A person moving down this path will not have the years of experience to safely make choices with known outcomes. As a result people make many mistakes as they experiment around with new ideas and actions.
- A time to reconnect to the freedom of a child. Midlife Transformation closely resembles the time of being a child when you had to learn everything newly. People experiencing a midlife crisis will at times act as a child again as they are literally picking up where they left off from their childhood. This often means the resurfacing of many problems and dramas which were buried as a child. As a result sometimes within a midlife transformation a person can also be trying to resolve childhood issues. This just makes the process more confusing at times.
- A time to simplify. With so many changes happening, a person often simplifies their life to help figure out what's important to them. During the process of simplification often times a person will toss away a bit more than they bargain for.
- A time to break out of mis-matched relationships. People often use relationships to crutch their life. The trouble is when changing, a person will discover that the crutches no longer fit or are painful to wear. As a result relationships at times are tossed to the side during this process of change.Often times relationships break during a midlife crisis. Why? Simply because the partner isn't at a point of change themselves, or they are changing in a different direction with different needs. Partners are often are in conflict since they may not want changes to occur. The statement often heard is: "you are not the man I married" This phrase illustrates how drastic a mid life transformation truly is in changing a person. The extra strain of one person needing change, while the other person holds back is enough to break many relationships. Even if the relationship doesn't break, many people end up unhappy when partners don't sufficiently support the requirements of a new balance.
- Society is unsupportive of midlife change. It's not in the interest of society to encourage midlife change. From a very basic view point midlife crisis disrupts people and resources from flowing smoothly. Also people going through mid life transformation have tendencies to want to change society. Society will resist such changes itself: firstly by encouraging people not to change, secondly by helping people to stay the same and finally by alienation of those who disrupt the norms of society.
- A time of Mental, Physical and Spiritual evolution. One myth of the midlife crisis is it's only in the mind. A midlife crisis occurs within a very real physical transition time point in the human body. It's a very similar experience as a teenager switching from a child's body to an adult. Surprisingly western culture doesn't have a term for the physical changes as not everyone experiences it quite the same way or same time point. While it seems to start frequently around 37 to 42 years of age, it can happen sooner or later in life. Also many aspects of the physical changes are subtle changes in hormones, physical condition and attributes. Other aspects might be very apparent in the aches and pains of an aging body.One part of helping a person transverse a midlife crisis is to establish a new set of physical practices to help the body transition. This is a nice opportunity to take up yoga, Qi Gong, change diets, martial arts or even something as simple as a jogging practice to stimulate the transformation process.Another aspect of helping a person transform is to help reveal the missing parts of their life. We are each a combination of Mind, Body and Spirit, yet so many people concentrate on the Mind or Body or Spirit at the exclusion of the other parts. Midlife transformations are usually a time to fill and strengthen the missing parts of a person's life.
- True Mid Life Transformation is a process that spans years. Another misunderstanding about this process is thinking that this is a relatively quick single event of a few months. In fact even the term "Midlife Crisis" gives the impression of a sudden single event. It's not. The transformation process is often a series of events that span several years. Think about how being a teenager was a process that took 5 or 6 years, A Midlife transformation takes a similar time period. Typically I see people working through this period of transformation for 5 to 8 years. The process occurs in a series of transformative waves two to three years in length. Just when a person thinks they are done changing, everything then starts again and another series of events rocks their life.So: A midlife crisis will appear to some as being a brief fling, as people do suppress the change or actually re-transform back into an image of their old life. A large amount of outside pressure exists to make this the case. The power of our mind is very strong and the capability to suppress or even deny change is a very strong human trait.Compared to:
A midlife transformation as a series of life changes to become complete. To be the person you yearn to be.
- Some don't experience a Midlife transformation. A few souls balance and flow through life in such a way to seemingly never go through a midlife transformation.Humanity is a spectrum of experience. Not every one goes through a midlife crisis. The whole process is complicated being dependant upon many variables such as culture, support of friends and family, how a person lives life itself and so many other factors.A midlife transformation isn't a time of judgment or comparing your own experience to others. This is a time of acceptance and learning to flow with your life, body, mind and spirit to live as completely to your own nature as possible. In the American culture where so many are taught to be someone else from childhood, to chase an American dream of wealth: midlife crisis is a relatively common event, as many spend time not being themselves.
Mid Life Summary
I work with people on a case by case basis, since each person is a unique tapestry of needs, past events needing resolution, different future goals, different mixes of partners, supporting past obligations: all mixed together in the chaos of change. As a result, the process of aid is a delicate balance of patience and understanding.
The most important aspect for a person undergoing going a Midlife Transformation is to accept their nature is changing. It's important to approach this time of life not as a crisis but as a time for transformation and opportunity. It's not something that can be rushed or forced into a vision. Rather this is a time of following the needs of mind, body and spirit equally.
It's also important to understand, in change, resides the loss of old comforts and support. Often time's painful moments have to be embraced, experienced and accepted before the final transformation can occur.
Another important tool is to witness your own life. Document and explore your life with a journal, art, music, playing an instrument, dance, poetry and being open to witnessing how others see you. A problem within the midlife transformation is the action of changing places a person within a blind-spot to seeing their own nature. As a result, our shifting outer form is never quite what the mind perceives. Our minds cannot see ourselves purely. Journals, art, music, playing musical instruments, poetry, the observation of others all give critical feedback to help view one's nature and guide the transformation rather than shift blindly to illusions of what we think we are.
If you decide to explore art please remember: the art isn't about creating a masterpiece, it's simply about witnessing yourself. Art is an amazing tool to explore life and find place in the world. These are two qualities of life that people seek within their midlife transformation. Some people hesitate to use art or music at this point since it often seems daunting or it brings up bad experiences from younger years of failed artistic explorations. However, many years have passed and new skills have been added to one's life. The period of a midlife transformation is the perfect time to begin exploring life again with art and music. I must stress here that the goal is not one of a trade or career but for self exploration. Studies have shown with 5 to 10 years of focused practice anyone can get quite good at any skill. The length of time within a mid life transformation supports the drive and time required to develop our inner potential, since it provides both new energy and time for the channeling of such skills.
Finally and most importantly:
We all see the world as a reflection of ourselves.
Just because you are changing doesn't mean the world needs to change. Focus your energy upon yourself and not the world.
The Earth has been around for 4 billion years and isn't going anywhere quickly (Except around the sun at 67,000 mph). Trying to change the world, pretty much ensures you will have no energy left to transform and heal yourself. Trying to change another person means to take upon their nature into you, which effectively derails many mid life transformations. Instead embrace and discover your new nature. The world is truly a reflection of each of us, so changing the world simply means putting energy and time into embracing and transforming yourself completely and fully.
Let the world be a reflection of yourself in acceptance.
For Professional Assistance or Counseling
regarding your mid life transformation
Contact Casey at:
(360) 870-2897
Additional Midlife Crisis Reading Materials
- Audio Files About Midlife Transformation
- Helping Partners in Change
- Introduction to Midlife Transformation
- Midlife and Menopause
- Midlife and SoulMates
- Midlife Crisis Affairs
- MidLife Crisis FAQ
- Movement For Midlife Transformation
- Professional Assistance for Your Crisis
- Quarter Life Crisis at 25
- Rediscovering and Revitalizing your Spirit
- Retirement from MidLife Crisis
- Signs of a Midlife Transformation
- Spiritual Divorce
- Taoism and Midlife Crisis
- Unemployment and Crisis
- Videos for Midlife Crisis
91 Responses to Midlife Crisis and Transformations
@Kim: I can't answer medical questions in a comment since I am not a Medical Doctor.
Much of the mid life crisis process is one where you have to take control of your own answers and begin building a new life. Many different aspects to this based on what is happening in your life at this moment. As a result, I have to talk to most people directly, in order to help them work efficiently and precisely through the situations at hand. Because of this, I only offer more in depth mid life transformation assistance to those who become a client or a student.
@Jill: Be strong, voice out your needs and actions so you can build a new life. To go against what society tries to shrink wrap and limit you into becoming a one of the countless clones of conformity.
Tim says:
I have been in a state of flux for at least a year. I have been searching for an idea of why I am who I am now. The life I built with my wife is good. Yet there is a restlessness within my heart and body I am unable to control. I fear the pain caused to others if I were to just follow where I feel pulled to. I do not want to end my family. I struggle within myself.
@Tim: You can do this and not lose your family.
But it's a difficult time and you must have patience with yourself
It means acting when required, allowing yourself to change, and working with those you love in a way they too can adjust to your new developing sense of self.
The restlessness you feel is the desire to discover your new life. You are right if you rush too fast you lose those around you, but if you don't strive ahead then you lose yourself.
As a result you must find a middle path. A path where you will make mistakes, but not big ones (where you can recover, learn and expand from your mistakes). A path where you will find successes, but small ones that add up over time to a whole new life.
If you need a guide send me an email and I can arrange some online sessions to help you.
Peace in your journey.
Lisa says:
I must be experiencing this. I am the mother to eight children and live with a man I do not know anymore. I have been wishing for death because life is too painful to live. I have always loved my life until now. I do not know where I took a wrong or right turn. I am on the potters wheel… ready to be molded. Just do not know what shape. I do not want to hurt anymore. I have cried more in the last few months than I have my entire 50 years. I want joy and peace. I want to be in a marriage where I know my husband loves me for who I am not what he thinks I should be.
@Lisa: Life is to be lived.
To wish for death means you are ready not to end this life but rather understand it really means you are truly ready to start living a whole new life.
It's time to start a fresh life. Restart life to discover a new life.
I felt the same way in my mid life crisis, and I restarted my life as a whole new life and I would do so again.
If you are feeling suicidal contact one of the help lines right away. This is a time of great hope, if you turn it all around to start fresh: which you can do.
Pattrizzia says:
Many of your signs of mid-life transformation are recognizable by me. A series of life events have made me unrecognizable to myself. My sister died (she went from being an olympic athlete to a street person), my baby brother died 1.5 years later, then my mother died exactly one year to the day of my baby brother. Prior to this, I was traveling the world with the love of my life (and writing in between). I gave him up when my sister took ill and brought her here to live with me until she died. I was plunged into DEATH all around me. Now, my youngest is in college (last year) and this is a major financial and stressful time being a single Mom supporting him. One of my daughters and her give children are living (temporarily) with me. I just want to be free. Structured religion does not help. Those people are very strange (I know — this is not being kind but the root of many evils is truly religion and I've had my share of slaps in the face from them). Point of this email — to say that your site validated a lot of what I am feeling and much of what I am going through. Thank you.
I am glad Personal Tao has been of help in your coming to terms with midlife crisis and transformation.
Be patient with yourself and take small sure sure steps.
In mid life crisis people often leap from religion to religion looking for answers: When the answer is to actually be open to what you truly want to be rather than what others will try to force you into becoming. It's a tricky balance looking for structure while being open to change.
Again be patient and stay true to your inner core, while never forcing others to follow what feels "right"; nor to explain yourself in something they will not understand nor accept (unless they too went thru mid life crisis). We each have our own path to explore. It's something to live to fully understand.
melody says:
I'm 54 and my husband is 63. His younger brother passed away 13 months ago. My husband and his brother were not on speaking terms for a few years.
I noticed that my husband started to change about 6 months after his brother invited us over and this was when his brother broke the news to him that he was dying and only had about 6 months to live. My husband made him alot of promises that he intends to keep. One of these was to take care of his family. My husband spends alot of time with his brothers wife and children because if his great commitment. In fact it is as through he has taken his brothers place but he still comes home at night. He has gotten himself a part time job which is know is really good for him since he has been on disability for a few years now. He tells me that he does not blame me for anything but he has taken all the money that we had saves and he has hidden it. He tells me that he loves me as a friend and the he does not love anyone and that he does not want to be loved. Several times he has told me that his brother was afraid to die.
My husband does not do anything around our house or large yard anymore. I have been doing it for him since I know that he is dealing with so much and trying to deal with the thought of his own mortality along with his part time job. I have been married to my husband for 35+ years. The whole ordeal has been really hard on me BUT, I DO NOT INTEND TO GIVE UP ON HIM. If changing myself for his sake (and for myself to become a better person) means that WE can both get through this I intend to do so.
Please, if you have any ideas to help me help him let me know..
Changing yourself to be who you want to be, and working to keep a relationship alive are not mutually exclusive.
Focus in on improving your lifestyle first. The more you focus on "Him" the faster and further away you will push him away from you. So take the time to work on yourself first. Only when he is ready for you to help him is there is an opportunity to help him.
Martina says:
My husband is currently experiencing this phenomenon–his began as a crisis but he seems to be navigating the transition fairly well now. He has left our home but joins me in counseling from time to time. He seems sincere in his attempts to find himself and we are in touch regularly. I am wondering what a spouse can do to support their significant other through this time in their lives. I struggle with being supportive because I feel rejected (mostly due to things that occurred during the crisis phase) and because I fear that our relationship will not survive. I feel both things: the desire for my husband to realize his true nature and fear that I will lose the person I love forever. I know that I can't and shouldn't want to stand in his way. So how can I be helpful to him?
@Martina: Read the Helping Partners in Change article, you will find listed in the side bar.
Release is the key word. Release your fear, release your partner, release your judgements.
But teaching release, that is where I step in to teach a person patiently how to release, because it isn't always obvious.
Many people refuse help, because they are doing everything they can not to let go. Yet things are already falling apart naturally, this is the natural decay of relationship ending. This is how most people learn the more painful lessons of release thru the mistakes of trial and error…
NO matter which path taken, the learning does take months. This is all because it takes time to emotionally catch up to the realities of the situation you are in.
So patience is key in mid life crisis. Patience to get to a place of release. Once you master release, then it becomes possible to grow and move ahead again.
The trick is be careful not to fall prey to hate or judgement which destroys any chance to a friendship later in life after a mid life crisis breakup.
Martina says:
Thank you for your words. You say to release the relationship. How does one do this in practice?
@Martina: The process of release is actually what I teach individually, since to release with grace, means to make fine / precise adjustments in a person's lifestyle, mindset and life.
It's easy to say release, but how to release is actually is a very indivualize process. What will work for one person will actually cause another person to hang on tighter.
The best I can say without actually having a session with you, is read through the pages I have written here. As you read, just be open to inspiration & ideas for places to release various judgements and blockages in your life.
In the end release is an action not a thought, the more you think about it, the less action you put into motion and the harder it is to release.
The average mid life crisis is release turned into conflict where the conflicts break apart your life as the release.
True mid life transformation that I teach is to release key blockages. This often starts with small precise releases that slowly meld together into realizations and new ways of looking at life that open into opportunities that power a person's growth.
Again this is easy to say, but because of uniqueness in everyone's process hard to generalize and write about on a web site.
I could write about some of the generic patterns I use but to do so, actually causes people to assume the wrong pattern or get angry over what they read or even focus their frustration at me. So no what I have here is just an optimal neutral starting point. It's up to you to find the next steps or get help from a guide.
My materials are written to be as helpful as possible. Getting a starting point is huge, use it with a smile and be gracious with that gift I have written. But more detailed help I only give to people I work with on a case by case process.
People always want more… but in this process "more" doesn't help. In this process you have to let go and start fresh to make it happen… or let the crisis itself break apart your life.
It's go time. It's all on you to choose how.
Traci says:
I think I was meant to find your website, I was actually trying yo find info on the third eye because I had a patient that I worked with that told me that I needed to open/develop my third eye, & to get rid of the fear of having it. This actually happened a few years ago, & I was kind of freaked out about what she said, & now after reading/researching this website I realized that I am experiencing a midlife crisis, & I am afraid to ask for help. I want change so badly I can taste it, but my fears stand in my way because I don't want to hurt anyone, especially my 2 children. I feel my husband is feeling these changes,& is not the nicest person when things are not going his way. I wish I had a supportive husband, which has not been the strongest part of our marriage. It seems with any changes or things that I desire to do or have it is a fight or an obstacle with him, & I don't understand. I want to get along & not have any anger towards one another, but sometimes his negativity gets a hold of me, & I feel it holding me back, & I have had enough. I know I need help & I want it to be a positive & healthy transition for my children & myself!
Bethany says:
Dear Casey
Some 5 years into navigating my husband's mid-life transformation I found your website and video. While I instinctively knew what was going on and attempted to understand the situation and handle this in a sensitive caring way, you have provided such clarity for me, and I'm sure others. While I had read quite a bit about this, at my darkest hour of letting go, you provided the context, compassion, frankness and insight that has helped me find peace. So thank you…for helping me to realize his transformation is not my fault…that I cannot and should not be his parent or teacher, but rather aim to be his friend with as much patience, grace and dignity as possible. While I am ready to face my own co-dependencies and look forward to my own transformation, I wondered if you could share a bit more about what I might expect (from your experience) on what my husband's "new person" might look like. After 28 years of marriage I know we both love each other and look forward to a new and different type of relationship…yet to be defined. He hasn't been able to articulate what he is going through and I would say it's been a fairly extreme "crisis" that has gone on for quite some time although the past year has been the worst. Does the "new person" become a blend of the old and new? Revert back to the old? Totally take on an entirely different persona? Or does it really vary by the individual? Now that I am working through the release stage, I guess my intellectual curiosity has gotten the better of me. Thank you for sharing your gifts with us…
Bethany: what is next for your husband really depends on many many different factors. Even a small change in how you hold yourself can have huge impacts on where he heads in his own process.
As a result I cannot tell you what to expect, because at this stage, literally so many results are possible in your husband's midlife crisis.
Ironically, you have more say than you realize in the mid life crisis, because in who you are, how you choose to grow, does also reflect into his choices… most powerfully when you remove yourself from his life and MLC process. The irony as you now know and accept is you cannot be directly be his teacher nor helper thru his Midlife changes, since if you do. it will end up usually having the exact opposite of what you hoped in the first place.
Generally speaking Release provides the most graceful and relatively safe path in helping a partner in MLC now. Don't overly try to out think or try to know where he will go. Concentrate on your life now. The more you try to know about them, the more you unconsciously shape them also. Instead take the time to know more about yourself first.
Bethany says:
Casey…my sincere thanks for reinforcing the path that I must follow. On to investing in myself. You have been so helpful – thank you!
@Bethany: You are welcomed. Yes people can be very predicable at times also, especially in points of crisis or in MLC. However, unless I understand all the different aspects of your situation, and no way could you post to me the info I require, I cannot say where your partner is heading towards, because what looks like to many people to be even a minor nuances can have profound implications on how a person reacts and then flows to their life.
The best answer is the one I gave you. Since once you release him, what matters is how you hold your own life and grow. And most ironically many times this approach has a long term positive helpful impact to partners also.
helpatmidlife says:
Well I've been going through the midlife transformation for ten months now. At first I never believed it was real but after reading more of the signs and seeing it is real I'm not sure how to move forward with it. I'm turning 35 on my next birthday it started after turning 34. I'm become obessed with my age and getting older and keep thinking back to my twenties and all the choices I didn't make. I feel like time is stating to run out for me to have the dreams I want in life. I mostly just want to escape my family and run away from my life. I' not sure if that makes any sense.
helpatmidlife says:
I look in the mirror and I see wrinkles grey hair signs of aging. I do not look like the young gal I was a decade ago. It's like as you age as a woman you become invisible. You no longer have the power you once did. My hands now look like my mother's hands and well I look like the middle aged woman not that you see at the grocery store. Society now views you as older. It's like I woke up one day and realized that I do not have my whole life ahead of me anymore. In five years I will be forty and my kids will be almost grown .I think why did I waste my youth on low paying jobs and bad choices that I can not go back in fix. I guess I have to move forward but I don't really want to move to the middle years.
@helpatmidlife: What you write about is very common at midlife transformation.
Our society makes people feel old before having lived a life fully. The truth is you are only old if you burn yourself out. In a culture that teaches people to always push at 110% it means many people do burn out. Worse is that Modern culture is a consumer culture, so once done with something, it throws it away. Modern culture throws away older people who get burnt out.
It is possible to re-ramp lifestyle and heal at this time. It's amazing but after people work with me, you can see a difference in how old they look. It's like taking 10 years off a person once you get them to live a lifestyle that is paced properly. More importantly, the body is more proactive in healing during Mid life Transformation. It is re-syncing and rewiring itself dramatically.
As a result if you approach Mid life Transformation with awareness and good lifestyle choices, it is pretty incredible how much you can improve and heal during this time of life.
Lost and Confused says:
My husband and have been together for 18 years and lived together for most of that time. We met at a very young age and didn't really date many other people. We had a child very young who is now 16 and were married 6 years ago. I felt like we were soul mates with a very rare love and I saw us growing old together. We understood each others thoughts and knew what each other liked. The man in front of for the past few months is not my husband. He stopped loving me and now he tells me he has regrets for staying with me.
I was the one who always worked the most and my husband said I negelected him when I was working two jobs and he wants me to feel that rejection. My neglect wasn't intentional. Then I lost my job and we moved out of state, away from all of our family and everything we know 3 years ago. My husband went after his career in the new state and I supported him whole hearted. He is in a very stressful job and I feel it's taking a toll on him but he told me he takes on any over time to avoid me. Where I am always looking to spend time with him.
He told me a few weeks ago he has been talking to another women but only over the phone. He had planned to start a relationshop with her an leave us. I asked him to end it. I was shocked that he would want to leave everything we have over such an emotional affair. He is telling me he hasn't been in love with me for years and that women made him miss what we had. The thing is my husband stopped doing things to show me he loves and all he has to do is try. The spark is still there, just has to be rekindled. I love my husband and my whole world revolves around him, he is the only person I feel has always been there for me until recently. He just wants to run from everything. Wants to get his own apartment, all though we can't afford it. Wants to Date other people but doesnt't want a divorce. Said he isn't looking for sex but a connection. He tells me we will be freinds forever but he has to live his life. We are going to cousleing. His counsler told him he has to decide if he can let go of his resentment.
I am trying my best to be patience through all of this. I don't want to lose my husband but I feel if I try to talk I just push him away. He still wants to spend time with me and go out together but wants to see what he has been missing too.
Everyone he talks to tells him he is making a mistake so he has turned away from them too.
How do I help him? He seems so confused. Will we survive this?
Lost and alone. I need advice.
@Lost and Confused: You help him with patience, you help by deciding what you need to do for yourself. To not force him to fit into your answers. You also need to not force yourself to fit into his answers.
After trying for a given period of time (the amount varies from couple to couple)
If you accept that you no longer fit each other then you release and do you best to be friends.
If you are patient and lucky you might come together into a newer relationship. But its a very tricky path. Most people fail, use force / judgement and then only get pain/conflict in the end as the reward.
More specific advice can only be given to those I work directly with since even the most delicate of advice can shift things into so many different states of relationship.
Shawn says:
After 25 years of verbal abuse, I left my husband. Practically overnight, he began making tremendous changes and begged me to come back. I did return after six months (because of our children) but I don't trust that his changes are permanent and I'm angry that our marriage suffered for so many years, only for him to change so quickly. I find myself no longer attracted to him and am constantly annoyed and find constant fault with him. However, I do love him but I'm not sure that I am not in love with him. I fantasize about life without him but am afraid of making a mistake and of hurting him and the kids. How can I make a decision and will my love/attraction return if I just hang in there?
@Shawn: When a relationship has abuse, then it doesn't go away easily, even when it seems to get better for a short time.
Grow the best you can. Love on it's own isn't enough for a relationship and if the love has been burnt out from abuse… then no it typically doesn't come back.
Lorie says:
My husband is going through a transformation. Two years ago he had an aorta dissection and survived. He got his health back and continued to work as a lab manager in a hospital. Last spring he decided to change his career and in late summer he started a journey to be a financial advisor. He loves financial planning and could have a potential to earn a lot more than at the lab. He struggled with this transition and started realizing that he doesn't like sales, which is a big part of being a financial advisor. Over the last two months he struggled with making a poor decision which sent him into a spiraling depression. He became unmotivated and could barely do his job. Last month his mother died. He is having problems with the unpleasant memories of growing up at home. When he returned from the funeral, he shut down. He could not and still struggles with motivation. He says he feels stuck, that he has failed at his job and made a huge mistake. He is on medical leave right now until mid February to try to get his mind clear and to decide what to do with his life. He is ashamed and embarrassed. I think he needs to go back to his old job so that we don't experience further financial devastation but know that I can't tell him that. He wants to figure out what to do with his life and isn't sure what that is right now. How do I help him? Is going back to his old job until he figures his life out the right path? Is this mid-life crises or just a man that has made a mistake?
Confused says:
I've been married for 15 years. My husband and I are really close and we've never wanted or imagine ourselves wanting or having children. But recently I have been consistently yearning for my own child. At the same time, I'm often feeling depress and lost. I'm 40 yrs old and I think I'm going through midlife transition. Is it midlife crisis that makes me want to have kids?
Confused: Midlife transformation is a time to reconcile life. So yes often times a person will revisit ideas and older ideals and have to think hard about the choices ahead.
It's a side effect of the transformation process. In change we reflect against our life and the decisions of the past and also come to terms with what we want to become for the future.
Lorie: You ask if your husband has made a mistake. If you hold it as a mistake… Then it becomes crisis. If you hold it as a lesson and opportunity to grow… then it becomes a hard path of transformation.
What he should do? Live in a way he can grow and thrive. Is that easy? No it isn't, many people fail because they crumple against the pressure of change. Many mistakes line the path to true growth.
It's how you use the mistakes to learn from that will determine ultimately if the path can become successful or not.
gch says:
Reading this is like turning around and seeing my footprints in the sand I recently walked along.
@GCH: Yes it is pretty amazing how many people travel the mid life change road. It is more amazing how society distracts and hurts people in midlife transformation to make it about crisis rather than growth.
Midlife crisis can be the doorway to the most beautiful changes when people turn into being about a time of transformation.
Lost at 46 says:
I am a 46 year old female married 23 years with 3 wonderful daughters. I feel guilty feeling sad and lost when I should be thankful for having everything. My husband went through his transition a few years ago and came out beautifully. He started running and lost 60 pounds and went from a beer drinking couch Potato to a buff marathon runner. I have stood by him and supported all he has done. But since this I feel lost and inadequate to him. I am busy with my girls and working the business we own together. I have time to "transform" but my problem is I don't know what my new self looks like. I don't know what my dreams are to even know where to head. I feel trapped and bored. Because of this I feel ugly and simply tolerated by him. I don't want to loose him but I know I need to find myself to be a better partner and regain the attractiveness I once had. How do I move forward?
@Lost at 46:
Don't ask yourself what to do to make yourself be better for another. (This path just spirals out of control into a mid life crisis)
Ask yourself… what is it I need to do to enjoy and connect to my own life in a better manner. (This path expands out into mid life transformation)
Ranette says:
I would just like to thank you for your generosity in providing a very gentle presence to people in midlife transitions. I have been accompanying some in the same situation and your site is a rich resource where I can refer them to. I commend your very integrative approach to understanding midlife. Thanks for the gift that you are, Casey.
Thanks Ranette.
Personal Tao is a resource to help people transform with grace. All too many people force midlife crisis to only be about breaking or the pain. Which then means they only get crisis. It really should be all about the transformation.
Mid life while complicated in terms of social interplay is actually not that complicated once a person starts to take smaller steps and stops trying to do everything "right".
Once you get a person to slow down and work with awareness it really is amazing all the new options that will come forward. To turn it all around from being a midlife crisis and then to help a person discover a midlife transformation.
Amy says:
My husband and I are both 34 years old. In December, when I was 6 months pregnant with our 2nd daughter, he told me he felt broken and wasn't in love with me anymore. He moved out for 9 weeks and was a complete monster during that time ( and was having an emotional affair with another woman). After 9 weeks he returned. He wasn't back to himself but was home. Then we had our daughter in April. He was back to his normal self for a while. Told me he loved me and our family and there was nothing he wanted more in life than to be with us. This went on for about 2 months. Then in June he started acting moody and depressed again. He moved out at the end of June saying " he needed to think." I found out that there was a different woman he met and was talking to/texting. Again he said he's not happy or in love with me. I learned from the first time and have completely detached myself. The other night he came home saying his head isn't right and he feels like a complete nut job and he struggles everyday. He says he doesn't want this for his kids and there is no person in this world he loves more than me I just listened and validated. That was a few nights ago and I haven't heard from him again.
Is there hope for us and where is he at in this crisis?
@Amy: Your husbands midlife crisis is going to be a harder longer process for him. You will have to be careful not to get too entangled with his own uncertainity.
I wouldn't focus on the word hope, as much as making sure you are as strong as possible as he takes the time to find himself. From the little you posted I would say he has deeper personal challenges to overcome first. He is looking for something that isn't within your marriage nor children. That you cannot be the person to heal him or help him find his way at this moment.
It is possible he can come back after his midlife crisis, but he is trying to find something, to heal himself while he is in crisis. In this instance if you try to heal him, his state of being while in crisis will ripple back into you breaking yourself.
There is something deeper stirring in his midlife crisis, something he needs to tackle on his own.
Grant says:
Hi Casey, just found your site and would like to offer my gratitude to you for creating this website. There are some fantastic resources to help all the lost people who are looking for answers in life.
Thanks Grant! May your midlife change and transformation be strong and graceful!
Marchelle says:
I am 33 years old and have been going through this crisis for the last 4 and a half to 5 years. Originally I experienced a sense of needing to do more, like I am supposed to fill a higher purpose. This feeling started to consume me so much so that I left my job. My personal life was in turmoil and I spent my time fixing ties with my husband and mostly ignored my desire to become the "more" I felt I needed to be because I just didn't know where to start. Slowly I reverted back to my old self, but now after 4 and half years th feeling has returned. I'm so confused, I believe that I should change but just don't know where to start. My job feels like it is literally sucking the life from me, but how do I just quite? We won't be able to pay our bond or support our family otherwise,but I'm dying…
The challenge of midlife crisis and balancing work can be incredibly tough for many people.
It's a hard challenge to support oneself in transition. We have to make hard choices, but choices that leave options open and enough support to survive.
It often means working in transitional jobs to allow the midlife transformation to continue while supporting those you love.
People in midlife change often feel the calling to a higher purpose and just leave everything… which then destroys them completely from the lack of support.
I teach people how to turn around jobs to be part of the process. So you don't run away from one job to just repeat the patterns of crisis into the next job. (All too many people just drag their issues or crisis from job to job: that isn't an efficient path.)
So pace yourself, yes learn from the job and over time step towards your new life. In a manner that is sustainable.
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