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Despite the uncertainty of the looming fiscal cliff, there are positive signs on the job front as we head into the New Year. Nearly 26% of companies nationwide say they're preparing to add more full-time employees in 2013. And the trend is holding true for some local businesses as well.
As we get ready to ring in the New Year, the phones are ringing off the hook at Allegiance Staffing in Wetumpka.
Staffing Coordinator Caitlin Haskins said, "Most of the people that call are unemployed. Some are looking for a career change, but most people do not have jobs."
Haskins says they're planning to fill more than one hundred manufacturing jobs starting in January, out of their Wetumpka and Montgomery branches.
"We have a company here in Wetumpka that is going to have a project starting up at the beginning of the year. It's going to last 4 months, and then they have another project starting after that that is going to require even more manpower. And so they are hoping to start up a steady manufacturing flow from there," Haskins added.
That same optimism is being felt across the country as well. Robert Sumichrast, from the Terry College of Business at the University of Georgia, said, "We are going to see employment growth in everything. Business services and professional services will lead the pack. The only thing that is going to be losing jobs will be government."
But as we close in on January 1st, business analysts say, that growth is hinging on decision making in Washington.
"One of the big things that is underpinning our forecast for continued growth is not going over the fiscal cliff," said Sumichrast.
Back in Wetumpka, however, Haskins says neither hiring managers nor job applicants are letting it stop them from turning over a new leaf in the new year.
Haskins said, "2013 is going to be a much better year. We are optimistic. There are new companies that we are working with, so we are hoping for a much better year than 2012."
If you are interested in applying for the 100 plus manufacturing jobs, you can apply at Allegiance Staffing at either their Montgomery Branch at 1231 Suite B, Perry Hill Road or their Wetumpka Branch at 625 Coosa River Parkway.
You can also call their Wetumpka Staffing office at (334) 567-3476 for more information.


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If Sarah Kauss turned back the pages of her journal to August 2010, she'd likely find an entry about a scorching day in the Sonoran Desert. With the sun beating down on her, all she wanted was a cold drink—but the water she carried was lukewarm from the heat. The experience gave her an idea that would change her life.
Two months later, a stylish, reusable bottle with the ability to keep liquid cold for up to 24 hours, otherwise known as the S'well bottle, was born.
Kauss still uses her journal every day, which serves as a reminder of the progress that she's made over the years. With just a flip of a page, she can reflect on the highlights and learn from the hangups of her past, something that provides "a sense of positive momentum" as she moves forward.

subset: commoncrawl


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Are these suspensions the end or just the beginning?
A hazing scandal that has rocked Carmel High School continued to spread Friday, with a fourth senior basketball player kicked off the team.
The student was removed from the team as a result of the continuing police investigation into a Jan. 22 incident in which two freshmen allegedly were assaulted by seniors during a bus ride. It was unclear whether the fourth student's suspension resulted from that incident. Three other seniors were kicked off the team because of the incident, leaving just one senior player to be introduced Friday night at Carmel's final regular-season game against Brebeuf Jesuit, which Carmel won 59-43. Police and school officials would provide no details about what led to the fourth student's suspension.
The revelation followed news Thursday that a 17-year-old said students had assaulted him Jan. 8 in a locker room. A police report obtained by WTHR (Channel 13), The Indianapolis Star's news-gathering partner, said the student who reported the incident told authorities "there were ongoing issues that were occurring in the locker rooms at Carmel High School."
SOURCE: CarmelStar.com | Carmel, Indiana, breaking news, photos, things to do | IndyStar.com | The Indianapolis Star


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Home > Party Themes > Luau > Sale
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Macklemore & Ryan Lewis - "Same Love ft. Mary Lambert"
Last November, I had the absolute privilege of meeting Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. They were having a meet-and-greet at Nice Kicks in Austin, Texas, which was conveniently only a couple of blocks or so away from my dormitory. I hurried there with my friends, and we got to chat with the two talented Seattle-based musicians. Macklemore was and remains a very articulate human being who is deeply invested in social issues. His songs touch upon various themes. Everything from dancing like a fool to consumerism is addressed. I'm glad that he's gaining so much popularity within the past year. I wonder if he remembers the tiny girl dressed in grey and black who tried really hard not to get crushed in the front row at Emo's. He's off touring and doing amazing things now. It's always wonderful to see growth in musicians, and Macklemore is no exception.


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Investing in rural women contributes to food security
Women in agriculture play a vital role as agents of food security and rural economic growth, but often endure poor working conditions and receive limited recognition for their contributions. The International Day of Rural Women takes place each year on October 15 to honour the multiple roles that rural women play worldwide.
Cooperatives for better livelihoods and food security
Producers' cooperatives help rural women in farming, fishing and forestry meet the special challenges they face, including gender inequalities.
Supporting Asia-Pacific agriculture with better data
Access to agricultural land emerged as the number-one source of gender inequality in national gender profiles compiled for the first time ever in Cambodia, Lao People's Democratic Republic and Vietnam.
Ghana: Striving for sustainable agriculture without child labour
Improving social and economic conditions for rural people is one of the keys to tackling child labour. So is reducing the exploitation of girls and boys in agriculture. An FAO study in Ghana looks at the issue.
Protecting the property rights of women and children in Mozambique
Evictions, confiscation of property and discrimination are among the experiences increasingly reported by widows and orphans in Mozambique. An FAO-commissioned report offers recommendations to secure women's and children's rights to property and inheritance.


text:
How new IRS rules affect same-sex married couples
Ah, the freedom to give money to the government -- together. New IRS rules apply to all married same-sex couples, no matter where they live.
This post comes from Brandon Ballenger at partner site Money Talks News.
Uncle Sam says there's nothing wrong with rainbow pride, but he wants to know where that pot of gold is.
The IRS recently announced that its rules for married opposite-sex couples will now apply to all legally married same-sex couples.
"The ruling applies regardless of whether the couple lives in a jurisdiction that recognizes same-sex marriage or a jurisdiction that does not recognize same-sex marriage," the Treasury Department says.
The change resulted from the U.S. Supreme Court's June ruling that struck down parts of the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act. That case directly involved taxes: Because of DOMA, Edith Windsor had to pay $363,000 in taxes when she inherited the estate of her late wife, Thea Spyer, while a heterosexual spouse would have paid nothing.
"Thanks to today's ruling at the Treasury Department, no one will have to experience the pain and indignity that I went through ever again," Windsor said in a statement quoted by The Washington Post.
Here's what the ruling means for same-sex couples:
- "The policy applies only to legally married couples and not to those in registered domestic partnerships, civil unions or similar formal relationships recognized by certain states," the Post says.
- After Sept. 16 (when the policy takes effect), couples will have the option to amend the past three years' tax returns, which could generate a refund.
- Henceforth, same-sex couples will file with "married filing jointly" or "married filing separately" status.
- "The ruling applies to all federal tax provisions where marriage is a factor, including filing status, claiming personal and dependency exemptions, standard deductions, employee benefits, contributing to an IRA, and claiming the earned income tax credit or child tax credit," the Treasury Department says.
- Some people could end up paying more as a result of the new rules. Says USA Today, "Not all same-sex couples will benefit from the decision; some may pay higher income taxes as a result of the 'marriage penalty.'"
Welcome to the married taxpayers club. With all these changes, it's a good idea to start preparing for next tax season.
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text:
A Place of My Own
Published on - January 16th, 2012 (by J.D. Roth)
Two months ago today, I asked my wife for a divorce.
I won't be writing about the personal aspects of the divorce at Get Rich Slowly. In fact, other than some brief background at my personal site, I don't intend to write it about it on the web at all. Kris and I are both emotional wrecks right now; the wounds are fresh and raw for both of us.
That said, I can no longer avoid sharing the truth with GRS readers. Too many of my financial decisions — present and future — are tied to the divorce. I'm hunting for health insurance, for instance, and I'll have to re-evaluate my asset allocation. And ten days ago, I moved to a new apartment.
Living Small
For the past eight years, Kris and I have lived in an 1800-square-foot house on three-fifths of an acre. The place also includes a large garage, a workshop, and a couple of out-buildings. Plus, I've been leasing an office up the street. Despite working to reduce clutter in my life, I have a lot of Stuff. I've written a lot about wanting to simplify, about wanting to live in a smaller space, but I've been reluctant to take the necessary action.
Now, though, I'm moving. And because I'm moving, I feel obligated to practice what I preach. While part of me wants to find another house (Kris is keeping ours), I know it's better to find a smaller space and to adjust my life to fit it. Thus, I've been looking to see how some of my friends manage to live not-so-big lives.
For instance, last fall Tammy — who writes about simplicity at Rowdy Kittens (and who shared a GRS reader story about the benefits of biking) — moved into a tiny house. The entire home is only 130 square feet! She and her husband had me over for dinner recently, and I shot some video of the space:
I loved Tammy and Logan's tiny house. The floor plan is well-designed and functional. Still, I'm not ready to live that small just yet.
Instead, I opted to rent an apartment.
The Apartment
While most folks were spending Thanksgiving week, well, giving thanks, I was hunting for apartments. Some might consider going from house to apartment a step backward. I don't mind. In fact, as I've mentioned before, I actually believe renting can be a great choice for the right person. In this case, I think I'm the right person.
While searching for a place to live, I tried to take a lot of things into account. Price was important, obviously, but so was the age of the place, the layout, and, especially, the location. Over the past five years, I've come to place a premium on walkable neighborhoods, and I know I wanted an apartment with a high walk score.
I found a place I liked in a good location near downtown Portland — the biggest drawback is that it's right next to a donut shop (danger! danger!) — and signed a lease. But then I started to worry that I was paying too much. By comparing notes with other people, I've since decided that while I'm not getting a bargain, my rent is reasonable.
Best of all, the apartment has a walk score of 88 (very walkable) and a transit score of 73 (excellent transit). And because I'm an avid walker, I can reach neighborhoods that the Walk Score app doesn't consider. (As a comparison, our house has a walk score of 49, meaning car-dependent, and a transit score of 32, which means it has some transit.)
I've been in my new place for ten days now, and I like it — but it doesn't feel like home. Still, I'm trying to make the most of these 705 square feet. Instead of just talking about how much I want to cut back on clutter, I've been faced with tough decisions every day. Which books do I keep? Which comics? How many pairs of shoes? How many jackets? Do I really need (or want) my records and record player?
By making judicious choices (and with the help of some new furniture from Ikea), I think I've reached a good balance. My new place contains the things I need — but it's not filled with a lot of clutter and junk. It's my hope that this will continue for the foreseeable future.
Fear of the Future
Now that I have a place to live — and now that I'm mostly unpacked — there are other problems to tackle as a result of the divorce.
For one, how do I handle health insurance? For eighteen years, I've been on Kris' policy. Not anymore. After the divorce is final, I have only a few weeks (or maybe even just a few days) before my coverage with her carrier lapses. I'm the sort of guy who might risk going without health insurance for a few months or years, but Kris won't have it. "We are not getting a divorce until you can prove to me that you have health insurance," she told me the other day.
Meanwhile, what do I do about my office? Does it make sense to continue to rent that space? Should I find someplace closer? More importantly, what about day-to-day stuff like laundry and groceries. Obviously, I'm capable of handling these chores on my own, but due to the division of labor within our marriage, I've always relied on Kris to handle most of these chores. Now I'm going to have to budget for food, plan meals, and buy supplies on my own.
Kris has lots of questions about the future too. She's still in the house, after all. How will she handle the yard work? Who's going to take care of her car? And so on. But she too is capable of handling these things on her own. Besides, we both agree that figuring out the chores is inconsequential to figuring out the big stuff, the emotional stuff.
For now, Kris and I are still in constant contact. We had dinner Friday night, I drove by the house yesterday, and we'll have dinner together tomorrow night. Plus, we still plan to share a vacation to Argentina in a few weeks. If one of us gets into trouble, the other will be there to help. Our marriage may be ending, but our friendship isn't.
This article is about House and Home, Real-Life, Relationships
1Nicole says:16 January 2012 at 5:15 am
I'm so sorry to hear this. Best of luck to both of you going forward.
13jack foley says:16 January 2012 at 6:06 am
Its great that the two of ye have a good friendship going forward.
She speaks volumes about ye both..
575Molly says:22 May 2012 at 7:32 am
I have to agree. Kris is a truly awesome lady who cares about your health and that's how divorce should happen. In a way that both can still care about the welfare of each other, especially since you guys have kids.
I'm sorry to hear about the divorce. Best wishes to both of you guys.
59Janette says:16 January 2012 at 8:43 am
Many 15+ years relations go through a period of separation/ divorce. I always urge legal separation over divorce for at least five year UNLESS there is another person in the picture. There is a period of shake up. It is a growth spurt. About 75% of my friends who separated are together again now. The other ones have moved along to another relationship. Those who started with divorce have never gotten back together.
Having a parent or partner in crisis often starts the relationship flaws coming to light- pushing the "I have so much to do…"
Think about it.
Slow dow, Look at separation and keep the health insurance.
Doesn't sound like it is really over from here.
78elisabeth says:16 January 2012 at 9:19 am
Hi –I agree with Janette and others that you can't know what the future of this relationship will be, and it is great that you are currently working on keeping a friendship if not a marriage. What two people who care for each other need in/from a relationship can change over time, and it's not always necessary to try to use the names and definitions that are the most visible/dominant in the culture. Many years ago Crystal Eastman wrote an essay titled, "Marriage under two roofs" in which she described one ideal situation — which allowed the partners a lot more separate time while still recognizing an essential bond. I have a friend who has been divorced for many years, and yet she knows that her former husband (neither has remarried) would be there is she needs him (like when she was flooded out of her house, he and his brother arrived and spent months helping her rebuild) and she for him.
87Mark says:16 January 2012 at 9:40 am
Wow! My wife and I have been separated for 7 months now. We still love each other but a suicide in our lives changed the way we look at things and what we want in life. I've been thinking about writing to J.D. about how this and it has impacted my financial decisions. I still hold hope that we can end or separation and continue or marriage.J.D.'s note: Mark, a very astute long-time friend today noted that many of my values seemed to shift when my best friend committed suicide three years ago this week. She's right. I can't say that everything that's happened in the past three years is the result of Sparky's death, but that one event has had a tremendous impact on my life and decisions.
546MF says:26 January 2012 at 8:40 am
I agree with Janette and Elisabeth. Give it a little longer with a separation, think, meet and talk, and see what happens.
Here's an Authors @ Google talk on marriage that I recently listened to and found helpful. Perhaps you will as well: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9THu0PZwwk
121Betsy says:16 January 2012 at 12:09 pm
"Having a parent or partner in crisis often starts the relationship flaws coming to light- pushing the "I have so much to do…" "
Having lost both my parents within 9 months, I can relate to this statement. One benefit to having kids in a relationship is that it slows down your reaction time. I agree, take it slow. Great advice on the health insurance, also. It would be a much better deal to pay the wife a premium on her plan than to get an individual plan. Who wants to make the insurance companies richer?
24517 January 2012 at 6:30 am
As a long time follower, and not that I know you personally, but I can't say that I'm totally surprised by this news. You have had huge changes in your life over the last few years, changes in your career, changes in your personal finances, changes in how you live your life and how you spend your time, it only makes sense that all those changes might cause a disconnect or a separation with your significant other.
Change is going to happen over one's lifetime, as I say change is the only constant, but you have had a ton of change in a short period of time and if you guys are not growing and changing in the same directions that can spell trouble.
Best of luck.
216 January 2012 at 5:21 am
Changes happens. It's how we react to them that matters. Best of luck to you and Kris.
3Becky says:16 January 2012 at 5:22 am
I wish you both the best of luck. I know it can be difficult making decisions right now, so the best thing may be to not make any major decisions (as per Dave Ramsey – give it 6 mos. before making major decisions after a life changing event). Just "be" instead of "do". You will end up where you need to be, but maybe not where you intended.
4Kaitlyn says:16 January 2012 at 5:25 am
Good luck to both of you.
5Rail says:16 January 2012 at 5:35 am
My condolences and wishes of best luck to both Kris and JD. My thoughts go out to both of you.
6Amanda says:16 January 2012 at 5:44 am
Hoping for eventual peace and happiness for the both of you.
7Sarah Anderson says:16 January 2012 at 5:47 am
I'm a on and off reader of your blog.
I have to say that I'm a bit surprise about the turn of events for you & Kris. Divorce is never a good thing unless there is violence & potential for physical harm involved, IMHO.
Things & circumstances change over a lifetime & I guess couples have to adjust to these changes which causes friction.
Do hope that both you and Kris can work things through.
57Becka says:16 January 2012 at 8:30 am
Things other than violence or danger can make a marriage untenable. To assert otherwise is a tad judgmental.
198Hermes173 says:16 January 2012 at 8:29 pm
To call another person judgmental is being judgmental.
213imelda says:16 January 2012 at 10:22 pm
Completely, completely wrong.
judgmental: Having or displaying an excessively critical point of view.
We usually say someone is being judgmental when they are criticizing someone without a sufficient understanding of the situation. As in this case.
It is often helpful, and correct, to point out when someone is being judgmental. People love to play holier-than-thou, until it's their turn.
8Jade says:16 January 2012 at 5:48 am
Wow… that was an unpleasant surprise to wake up to. I'm sorry for both of you. Best wishes.
11SB @ One Cent At A Time says:16 January 2012 at 5:56 am
Sorry to hear. All the very best to your future life, both of you. Would miss GRS garden project but looking forward to see some apartment projects in this space as we also are an apartment living souls.
12Adam says:16 January 2012 at 6:02 am
Man that sucks. I've been going through the same myself.
I went through a serious financial crisis after the divorce that I'm still recovering from. It's hard to budget after being used to a two income lifestyle for years. I spent more money because I found I had much more alone time where I got bored. I know you think about your finances all the time, but a divorce can really make you change some of your preconceptions.
Also, my ex and I tried really hard to remain friends also. That can get tricky. We've done the back and forth thing because we really do get along well as friends. Now we are friendly but keep a respectful distance.
Good luck to you both!
14Stephen says:16 January 2012 at 6:07 am
Honestly, I re-read that first sentence more than once before looking to see if it was actually J.D. that was writing the post and not a guest post.
On the one hand, I'm deeply saddened to hear the news. On the other, perhaps a congratulations is in order. Lots of people stay in relationships they shouldn't and maybe this was the case here. While lots of readers may want to know more details, always respect your right to privacy and especially that of Kris.
In either case, I do commend you for posting this and wish you BOTH the best of luck in life.
61Cheryl says:16 January 2012 at 8:46 am
I too, had to reread the first sentance more than once. I read your blog/posts everyday. I don't know you personally but was momentarily sadden by the news. Thank you for sharing. I look forward to facing your future. I wish you and Kris happiness in your new normal.
261Roberta says:17 January 2012 at 8:50 am
Add me to the list of people who did a double take to make sure it was J.D. writing this post. What timing, too… my husband and I just split, and I moved into a place of my own one week ago, so I can really relate to where you're at. My best wishes to you and Kris. That you're remaining friends speaks volumes about both of you.
266Sue says:17 January 2012 at 9:41 am
I'm saddened, too. Condolences to you and Kris, I'm certain this decision was not made lightly and you both will end up as better people a few months from now. I started reading your blog a couple of years ago after my divorce, and it's been such a help and motivator for positive change. Be good to yourselves.
15Tom says:16 January 2012 at 6:11 am
(Ditto on you have my condolences and best of luck)J.D.'s note: Okay, this comment was hilarious, and a good inside GRS joke. I forgot to ask Kris what she thought of it, but I'll be she got a chuckle too.
290tjdebtfree says:17 January 2012 at 11:47 am
This made me LOL! This was my #1 huge pet peeve about my ex – well aside from the excessive spending, cheating, spending, cheating; etc etc etc – the fact that he couldn't/wouldn't do laundry infuriated me every day of my life…I still hate doing laundry to this day!!!
383Katie says:17 January 2012 at 8:12 pm
I suggest finding a laundromat with a fluff and fold or wash and fold service as a trial while you have bigger things to worry about doing your laundry. If you're in a walkable neighborhood there's probably one around, or certainly near any student neighborhood. A good price is 1 – 1.1 $/lb, but I've heard of up to 1.5 $/lb. 10 lb minimums are common and a good place should offer same day service if you drop it off in the morning.
It may not be economical long term, especially if you work out a lot. The balance changes if you don't have a washer dryer in your apartment and the building ones are pricey. It's also a great trick if you're traveling to avoid expensive hotel laundry prices.
512Allie says:20 January 2012 at 11:23 am
I shouldn't laugh, but that was my first thought too!
17honeybee says:16 January 2012 at 6:18 am
You're both in our thoughts. Best of luck to you both.
18Wes says:16 January 2012 at 6:25 am
Sorry to hear it, JD, though not really surprised – while reading some of your travel writing (when you wrote about how much you enjoyed traveling alone), I thought to myself, "I wonder how his marriage can hold up if he's thinking like that?" Regardless, good luck in whatever comes next.
129Ohplease says:16 January 2012 at 1:00 pm
Funny, I was thinking that too.
I am very sorry this has happened.
158Ben says:16 January 2012 at 2:57 pm
Thinking the same thing also. I don't know anybody who takes multiple vacations/work trips alone for weeks at a time without it impacting a marriage.
Nevertheless, I was saddened by this news but hope some good comes out of it.
337margot says:17 January 2012 at 3:26 pm
It's very possible to have a healthy marriage with people in the marriage taking solo trips and each person doing what he or she loves on their own or with friends. I know dozens of examples like this, especially in a town like DC where lots of couples both have exciting, demanding jobs or both people love to travel but might prefer different locations or different travel activities. There are many models of marriage that work well.
416Janette says:18 January 2012 at 7:45 am
Thirty years and going strong. I travel for business and pleasure all the time. My husband enjoys wood working at home. We love it. Lots of things to talk about when I get home!
470Diane says:18 January 2012 at 5:46 pm
Good job, Chris Guillebeau.
19Chickybeth says:16 January 2012 at 6:29 am
Although I wasn't so surprised, I am thinking good thoughts for you both. I hope you both find a place that makes you happy.
20Elizabeth says:16 January 2012 at 6:31 am
J.D., i'm sorry to hear your news. My thoughts are with you and Kris during this difficult transition.
This may sound strange, but as an apartment dweller I suggest putting up pictures on your wall as soon as– maybe some blown up shots from your trips or friends and family? I found that one thing added some personality to my otherwise generic apartment and helped it feel more like home.
Best wishes for you both in the future.
53cc says:16 January 2012 at 8:25 am
my momma read somewhere to put up at least three photos: one with you and your family (maybe parents/siblings) having a good time, one with you and your friends having a good time, and one of someplace you love to go.
condolences to you both; best wishes for the future.
also, you'll come to love an apartment. anything happens at all ever? not your problem, call the landlord.
21BIGSeth says:16 January 2012 at 6:35 am
As it sounds like something you both want, I say "Congrats on the divorce!".
That said, I too recommend going small and slow for the next 6 months or so. Don't make any wild moves with your finances until this wild move levels out.
Thanks for the Walk Score link – 98!
22Angela says:16 January 2012 at 6:36 am
I am very, very sorry to hear this. For regular readers, this is still a surprise though perhaps not a shock, given the subtext of some of your recent posts. I can only join the chorus of well-wishing for you both. Best of luck to each of you during this difficult time.
26Trisha says:16 January 2012 at 6:46 am
It doesn't make good financial sense to continue to rent an office space when you have a good sized apartment. The money you save on rent can go towards your insurance. I am sure there are other considerations, but 700+ sq.ft. is a good amount of space for one person.
I follow the Tiny House blog and there are tiny homes out there for a weekend rental-so you can try it on for "size". Just an FYI for the future.
Life goes on and so do we.Best wishes to you both.
31Deborah+M says:16 January 2012 at 7:03 am
Double-take. Wha' the heck?
Sorry to hear this news, J.D. and Kris.It is true there's been more than a little subtext of issues, but one always assumes that if the couple is able to articulate the issues that they are dealing with them. But I see now, that articulating them can help in other ways… in that you're remaining friends.
I agree with Trisha that for the moment, especially as you're in such a walkable part of Portland, that you should try to work from home, JD. You shouldn't run from one cubbyhole (home) to another (office), for a change of pace. My advice would be to enjoy your new location and get out-and-about in it as much as you can, and put as much as you can of that $500 towards healthcare coverage.
36BIGSeth says:16 January 2012 at 7:18 am
I think right now there might be some value for JD in getting out and about. I also think separating work and home can be a very good thing. In spite of the whole I-blog-in-my-sweatpants image, GRS is a serious endeavour and should be treated as any other business.
51Margo says:16 January 2012 at 8:17 am
I agree – keep the office for 90 days. JD just moved out of his home, is setting up a new one, and the hours away from the apartment could be valuable for sanity's sake. Don't change everything about your life all at once.
70Lynda says:16 January 2012 at 8:57 am
I'd keep the office for 90 days to provide continuity for "this is where I go to work" space. Not sure if you have acquaintances there, or how the building is set up, but having familiar faces around is always a good thing when working alone.
And Good Luck to both of you.
255Davina says:17 January 2012 at 7:57 am
When you work at home you can also write off on your taxes a portion of your rent, utilities and upkeep as a business expense.
468Amanda says:18 January 2012 at 5:29 pm
I just read that you need to be EXTREMELY careful about that, because depending on how/what you write off, you can't actually do anything but work in the space you claim to work in. I'd be very careful about following this advice.
499Megan says:19 January 2012 at 2:22 pm
Ditto on the home office deduction. I heard it's also a red flag for an audit. I've spoken to a few accountants about it, and they have all said that the time you invest in filling out the forms, etc., isn't worth it for just $100.
But back to JD: I'm sorry to hear about your divorce, and I wish you both the best.
27Isela says:16 January 2012 at 6:49 am
It´s a though decision, but hopefully it will end being the best one for both of you.
One therapist told me that if you still care deeply for the other person and want the best for him or her, then that was true love…and that love just evolved into a different level.
Just hang on there and let the grief pass. Change is difficult, but also make us grow and mature.
Un abrazo.
28Dogs or Dollars says:16 January 2012 at 6:51 am
While I was very sad to read that first statement, I can't say I am surprised. As a long time reader, I've caught several references to your desire to change your living arrangement. Kris likes the big house. You don't. Kris seems to be happy with the status quo and you are wanting to shake things up.
It's just sad you can't find a way to change together. Or maybe you can and this is just part of that.
In any case, best of luck to both of you, especially as you navigate these turbulent waters.
40Mary+Kate says:16 January 2012 at 7:30 am
I'm not surprised but I am saddened. I hope that Kris is as happy about this as you are. I hope everything works out for both of you.
29mom of five says:16 January 2012 at 6:52 am
I'm very sorry to hear your news. Condolences to you and Kris.
30Anne says:16 January 2012 at 7:03 am
If this is what comes of self improvement thank goodness I'm still fat and poor.
I won't wish you the best. You had the best life could offer. Tiny houses are not needed to house tiny hearts.
4116 January 2012 at 7:33 am
Well that was rather nasty, don't you think?
Unlike Anne, I know that sometimes life changes and we change, and that sometimes what worked great for 20 years doesn't work anymore. Sometimes it's best to end situations which aren't beneficial to those involved, including divorce.
Only you and Kris know if that applies to you here, and I do wish you the best in this journey. I wish you both the strength to make decisions, the patience to think things through, and the foresight to know if things are right for you (whatever those 'things' may be).
Both of you lean on your friends, and like Becky said (comment #3) just be. Whatever is supposed to happen will, painful as it might be.
45Beth says:16 January 2012 at 7:58 am
It saddens me to see a comment like Anne's and even more so that people "like" it.
46Jane says:16 January 2012 at 8:04 am
While Anne could have worded it much more judiciously and kindly, I certainly understand her sentiment. I don't know J.D., nor Kris, so the question I ask here is not for them but rather one I ask myself as a married woman after reading this blog and watching (in very subtle ways) the progression towards divorce:
What is the point of success, money, or personal enlightenment if it leads you farther away rather than closer to the ones you love most?
73Andrew says:16 January 2012 at 9:12 am
Money, success, and personal enlightenment may have nothing to do with the distance between us and the ones we no longer love, continue to love, or will love in the future.
160Beth says:16 January 2012 at 3:18 pm
I can see both sides of this issue, and it's not up to me to choose one.
I just think it's sad if we only offer understanding and compassion to people when we agree with their actions. I'm not saying people have to agree with those actions, but there's something to be said for not adding more hurt to an already painful situation.
166Carla says:16 January 2012 at 4:02 pm
Why does it *always* have to be so cut and dry; one or the other? It is possible to have both, even if the person we in some ways look up to does not *seem* (from our own narrow eyes) to have it at the moment.
77Andrew says:16 January 2012 at 9:16 am
Anne, given the unpleasantness and lack of charity in your comment, I can only conclude that the "tiny heart" you speak of must be your own.
136Ohplease says:16 January 2012 at 1:23 pm
Andrew, I agree.
Furthermore, we have no idea what motivated the divorce, so lets not jump to conclusions as to why JD and Kris have chosen this option.
Anne's comments are narrow-minded and yes, nasty, but what really bothers me is that at the time I wrote this 47 other people liked them, so I`m with you Beth.
How can one not wish the best to someone who is going through something so devastating? Where is your compassion?
137Donna Freedman says:16 January 2012 at 1:24 pm
People change. Sometimes this can be worked through and sometimes it can't. It is no one's business but his.
No reader is entitled to judge J.D.'s actions. He is doing what he needs to do — and don't for a moment think that this is easy for him.
256Davina says:17 January 2012 at 8:01 am
Back on ya, fat poor woman.
348sharon v says:17 January 2012 at 4:45 pm
Pardon me, Davina, but your comment is out of context, with nothing whatsoever to do with this commentary thread. Why attack someone for being supportive?
32Katie S says:16 January 2012 at 7:04 am
To address the health insurance question, you need to go see a health insurance broker. A broker will shop all the available plans and is paid a commission by the insurance company, not you. (I am dear friends with a broker in my area.) If you do not develop a good relationship or the vibe is wrong from who you went to see, find another one.
95AuntJenny says:16 January 2012 at 9:56 am
A lot of professional organizations offer health insurance to their members at a group rate. Maybe check that out too.
120Sandi_k says:16 January 2012 at 11:49 am
JD, I'm so sorry to hear this. Having been with my DH for more than 20 years, this hits close to home. I agree with other posters that the tone of your posts for the past year have been emphasizing the "me" rather than the "we", so it's not as much of a surprise as you might think.
In regards to the health insurance and divorce, keep in mind that a divorce is considered a "qualifying event", and you should be eligible for COBRA coverage in Kris' policy for 18 months post-divorce – for a hefty sum. It might be your best bet for some continuity, though.
Lastly, I REALLY like the idea of a separation for you two, rather than moving straight to divorce. Taking it slow in the process is not necessarily a bad thing.
294Steve says:17 January 2012 at 12:10 pm
I have never been through a divorce, but my understanding is that you can get COBRA from your former spouse's health plan. I think you pay them directly. It doesn't solve the problem long term, but it does buy you 18 months to find another option.
33Mike Piper says:16 January 2012 at 7:08 am
Wowzer. I hope this goes as well as possible for both of you.
3516 January 2012 at 7:15 am
Please make sure you take care of your self. In all of this hullabaloo there is a large risk for getting lost in all the details. Thank goodness you both have remained friends and i commend you on this.
Best advice is to just slow down and take it easy. Reevaluation is about transformation and change. This doesn't come easy but it does come naturally. One step at a time.
Best of luck and we are all rooting for you.
3716 January 2012 at 7:18 am
I'm really sorry to read this and like a previous poster I did a double take to see who was writing it. But I have to tell you, I'm not that surprised. There have been many clues in your writing over the past year or so that had me wondering about the state of your marriage.
Honestly I really enjoyed when you wrote about your life with Kris and when she wrote about gardening and canning.
Best of luck to both of you.J.D.'s note: I asked Kris tonight if she'd still be willing to contribute posts about gardening and canning. She said "maybe".
475Sandy says:18 January 2012 at 6:39 pm
JD, having gone through a divorce myself in the last couple of years, it's my thought that given the fact that Kris didn't want the divorce, perhaps this isn't the time to be asking her to do things for you in the future, such as contributing to your blog.
Hopefully this doesn't come off as too harsh, but I think it would be more appropriate to separate yourself and let her soak all of this in and deal with it, rather than asking for possible commitments that will keep her tied to you.
I understand that you're both still "friends" but at this point it's better to not rely on her for things that she did for you as your wife.
38saro says:16 January 2012 at 7:27 am
Sorry to hear it but good on both of you for handling it like adults. I wish you both the best.
39my honest answer says:16 January 2012 at 7:30 am
All the best to you both at this difficult time.
43Jill says:16 January 2012 at 7:55 am
So sorry. I, too, did a triple take. Good luck to you both as you face this difficult transition.
44David says:16 January 2012 at 7:56 am
I, too, am sorry to hear this. Allow me though to wonder if there's a higher incidence of divorce between couples who maintain different accounts or who treat their relationships as sort of a business arrangements.
Nothing personal against JD, his persona comes through this blog as a "good guy". But I can't help but wonder if those who go into a relationship with a yours vs. mine approach typically don't have as much chance of sticking together through the rought times. This is the contrast to the more "traditional" approach of melting together your lives in every way, including financials.
And I'm certainly not saying that those who meld together completely don't get divorced (and perhaps it's messier when that do!) Rather, those older couples that I know who have been married for decades all tend to have the traditional approach of everything is "ours". Sure, they may have some play money on the side, but the gist of it is "togetherness".
It's the same argument peoople have with prenuptual agreements. If you're going into it wondering what would happen when you get out, you're alreay allowing for an "out".
Another question I have regarding the "business arrangement" type of relationship is what happens when you get older. Take JD and Kris for example. Let's say they're in their 70′s, and Kris gets a terrible disease that eats through her savings. Would the couple still take a yours vs. mine approach? Or if Kris' disease (let's say cancer, for example) made it so that she could not help with household chores. Would JD do them and take money for his piggy bank for doing the work?
Again, nothing against JD or Kris. I'm just uncertain on how people keep "separate but equal" in a relationship. it didn't work for the American population when it came to rights, and I don't know how it works in a marriage.J.D.'s note: Kris and I want to assure everyone that the separate accounts had nothing to do with this. And, in fact, when it comes to divorce, separate accounts might as well not even exist because everything is treated as shared equally (at least in Oregon).
185skeptic says:16 January 2012 at 6:02 pm
I don't think there is a correlation between separate accounts and divorce.
For every divorced couple that you might claim had too much separateness, I think I could show you a divorced couple that jumped wholeheartedly into the idea of togetherness without actual shared values or other solid foundation to warrant it.
(and the same applies, I think, for prenups)
and I say this from the perspective of having shared finances and no prenup… but that doesn't make us a stronger couple than those who differ, it's just how our personalities approach these things.
24617 January 2012 at 6:44 am
I thought the same thing but didn't post it in my earlier post.
For purposes of divorce, separate accounts don't matter, but I wonder too if having separate accounts leads spouses to think separately about their finances and to further think separately about their life.
I've asked JD about this in the past and about their retirement plans since they divided their shared costs. I never got a clear understanding about this issue and one that I always wondered about. I have a dear friend who has a prenup and keeps her finances separate from her husband and we've discussed this issue. She makes more, they split the shared costs in funky way (in my mind). She is responsible for more of their shared costs so he actually seems to end up with more un-allocated monies that he spends on toys. He does not max out his retirement accounts and since they have no shared plan probably doesn't think he has the money to do so.
I asked her what she is going to do in retirement, a similar question I've posed to JD, she is savings but he is not. I've said, you are not going to let him go hungry are you? She responds that she will pick up the slack, so don't you want him to max out his tax advantaged savings now? She thought that was an interesting question so maybe she would fund his IRA.
I just don't see how a couple can plan for the future with separate accounts? Maybe they can but it seems like it would take a lot more work. I understand why my friend keeps her separate b/c she has a prenup and really has to based on the prenup but if she stays married to him I think this separate planning, or lack of planning, is going to cause more trouble in the long run
297Laura says:17 January 2012 at 12:31 pm
I'm still going through all 280+ comments on this post, but would like to add my $0.02 to the question on how much separate financial arrangements might affect a marriage. I've been married to my DH for nearly 26 years, and from Day One we have kept our money in separate accounts. When we became parents, money that was "ours" vs. his and mine did become more fluid, but we still don't want or need a joint account. While I would never say never to the possibility of a divorce, it doesn't seem likely (or desirable) in our case.
DH and I definitely have different interests and desires to spend our time differently, but it works for us because (a) we're both introverts and (b) while different, they're complimentary. He likes to watch movies in the basement; I like to read. When we sit down to a meal together, he tells me about what he's watching and I tell him about what I'm reading, or we talk about people we know or our jobs or the news. If he couldn't relate at all to what I was doing with my life or vice versa, that would be an indication that perhaps there's not enough common ground to build (or keep) a life together.
DH & I like to talk together. We try to eat together, even if we fix separate meals (which happens often). We have the same sense of humor and our jokes are in the same vein. We like each other's company, even though we'll often spend time on different activities in different parts of the house. On the rare occasions we argue, we cool off separately, then come together to hash it out again, and continue until some resolution takes place (compromise, agree to disagree). We say "I love you" each day, and always before going to sleep at night. And we keep our money separate because we know in that area, we don't get along well. We each have our space so we can breathe but our spaces aren't so far apart from each other to estrange us. I think those things are what keep us together.
34317 January 2012 at 4:20 pm
I think a lot of your points are valid. Even though we have joint accounts, we also have our own checking accounts that we use for day to day spending, i.e. our allowance money, as it would be too difficult for us to work from one account.
But I wonder, and perhaps you'll share, how you manage the joint planning for retirement, for your kids' college expenses, etc. if your finances are totally separate from each other.
Mr. Sam wouldn't be able to max out his 401k or his IRA if our finances were separate, but b/c I make more than he does and b/c our planning is joint and b/c our expenses are handled in a joint fashion he can do so. As a result, he collected close to $6000 in company match last year. If he was on his own that is money that would be left on the table.
375Laura says:17 January 2012 at 7:38 pm
Retirement savings are our employers' 401K plans so those are also separate. We have one child with no plans (or ability, at this point) for more. We both work at Boston-area colleges that grant tuition remission for children of employees if accepted (and DH's college also grants limited tuition remission for certain other colleges), so as long as DS is accepted into one of a handful of local schools, we're using that loophole. He can live at home (which he wants to do) and we can afford fees and books. As long as we continue to be frugal and don't lose our jobs, it should work.
458Nathan says:18 January 2012 at 2:22 pm
I'll be honest, I thought the same thing.
I've always thought the separate accounts advice JD gave was bad. It implies a lack of unity and trust with respect to shared goals, and tends to cultivate the idea that marriage is, in your heart of hearts, not REALLY permanent.
Having separate accounts serves no practical purpose, other than to encourage the idea that you are separate … not a unit, not partners, but two individuals who just happen to live together. You never fight about money, because you never have to talk about money. Such a deeply flawed strategy.
Dave Ramsey has always warned against this. And while I'm not saying that it's impossible to have a lasting marriage with separate accounts, I completely believe that it weakens the bond between husband and wife.
491Holly says:19 January 2012 at 10:50 am
I wholeheartedly agree. I also feel that having 'his' and 'hers' in regards to money can lead to bouts of resentment, jealously, competetiveness (which may or may not be good for a marriage), one person feeling less competent (respect issues), and often a lack of trust.
542Ida says:24 January 2012 at 10:59 pm
I couldn't disagree more. I have been married for 53 years and we have always had a his/hers/ours arrangement. I think that in my case, it helped to strengthen my marriage. We have always considered ourselves a team and have developed and worked toward our goals together–mortgages, 5 children, college, retirement, and now spoiling our 17 grandchildren and 5 great granchildren. The separate accounts is nice now because it makes Christmas and Valentines a little easier since we don't see each others purchases on statements. I got married at a time when single income families were the rule instead of the exception, so most of my friends had to ask their husbands for money. I have always appreciated the respect shown to me by my husband then by giving me money with no strings. Siince I began earning my own money, I like not fighting about how much I spend on lunch with my mah-jong group or how much he spends on lunch with his golf buddies.
However, my point is really that he best money system (or any system really) for a marriage is whichever system works for both partners. Just because the system wouldn't work for you or you can't understand it, doesn't make it wrong.
I also know that what keeps a marriage going and what can take it apart are unique to each marriage. As little as we really know J.D. and Kris, it's disrespectful and shortsighted to speculate in this way.
J.D. and Kris, I'm so sorry for you both and wish you both the best in such a difficult time.
555Bonnie says:31 January 2012 at 7:27 pm
Ida – Most people wouldn't consider your financial structure as "separate finances"
554Bonnie says:31 January 2012 at 7:14 pm
I wondered the same thing, not because keeping separate finances makes couples keep the rest of their lives separate, but because I've noticed that couples who have completely separate finances seem to have those separate finances because they don't want to combine their lives completely. IMO couples who keep completely separate finances either have the idea in the back of their minds that the separate finances will make it simpler if they ever decided to divorce (not that they ever think it's likely to happen when they get married) OR there's something wrong with their marriage that makes them not want to fully combine their lives (often something that may not even be readily apparent to the couple or that they'd even be able to articulate). I guess what I'm saying is that it seems like couples who keep completely separate finances view marriage as 50:50, rather than 100:100 (or 95:95), which can lead to more score-keeping and an unhealthy relationship.
47Karen says:16 January 2012 at 8:05 am
Oh, I read this with a heavy heart. My husband passed away more than two years ago and when I hear of people separating I always see it through my own filter of missing my partner. It's been so hard to adjust to not having that rock-solid relationship with the person who knew me best. But I'm sure it is easier to heal and move on when voluntarily chosen. Best of luck to you both.
48Surani says:16 January 2012 at 8:05 am
So sorry to hear that. I feel like I've known you both for the last 3 years. Best of luck in getting through this and in maintaining a good relationship.
49shash says:16 January 2012 at 8:09 am
I wish the best for Kris. If the subtext of your prior posts did not sound like every other man's justifications (hint: cliche) for leaving a long marriage, I might wish the best for you, but I cannot. Shaking my head with a sigh, over here. I can only hope that Kris is going to have as much support or more than you, who has so many people on the web to pat you on the back and hold your hand.J.D.'s note: Kris is fortunate to have many fantastic friends who are lending her support during this process. We're both grateful for that.
79Barb says:16 January 2012 at 9:23 am
I have to agree with this comment as well as the separate but equal comment. While I would say it asaburbtly as Anne did, my sympathies are all with Kris. This is not a joint decision, it's your decision. You've decided to leave her behind as far as I can see. No sympathy here. Frankly, it sounds like typical middle aged stuff, and I suspect youll regret it in a couple of years.
You, not Kris, have been making I decisions instead of we decisions if this blog is any indication for quite some time. Selfish? You bet.
84Andrew says:16 January 2012 at 9:31 am
You have no evidence to back this up. You are not a mindreader, and yet you presume to state that this is "not Kris' decision?". What a slap in the face to Kris, whom you see as a passive victim.
The fact that J.D. writes about his life in a public forum and Kris does not is irrelevant.
90sasha says:16 January 2012 at 9:43 am
If you read the link JD provided to his other blog – you would see that indeed, this is a JD decision. Kris doesn't want the divorce, JD asked for it.
91Wes says:16 January 2012 at 9:45 am
You should read the post JD links to on his personal site; he makes it very clear that the decision is his and that Kris "disagrees" that it [the divorce] is in their best interests.
103John says:16 January 2012 at 10:43 am
Committment means just that, not one is commited until they decide not to be. All the support should be going out to Kris, not another selfish middle age guy who doesn't go through every last effort to try to make it work. And yes, I don't know you or your situation, but I didn't read a thing about finding a way to make things right.
130Andrew says:16 January 2012 at 1:01 pm
You guys are right–I hadn't read the other stuff available through the link. I'm sorry I didn't look before I leapt!
188Jenna says:16 January 2012 at 6:27 pm
Barb read my mind in regards to feeling more for Kris. Interesting that JD's insights come after he is doing well financially, traveling, working on health, etc. All things that Kris probably encouraged throughout their long marriage. Perhaps we don't know the whole situation but what we do know screams cliche.J.D.'s note: You're making an assumption. My decision came after all these things, but that doesn't mean there's any sort of causal relationship. Yes, I know it seems like there's one on the surface. But there's not.
258Dan says:17 January 2012 at 8:28 am
Jenna's assumptions, J.D., and those of many who think like her, presumably come from a careful reading of the blog in recent months. Your decision to ask for a divorce would have come not long after a vacation you took without Kris (which was the subject of much debate in the blog comments at the time), and in the comments of the "Big House, Little House" post that raised some giant red flags back in June, you yourself conceded: "But I seem to be going through some sort of minor mid-life crisis." No one wants to see himself as a cliche, and indeed not everyone in your position ends up being one, but to those of us who've seen this play out time and time again within our own circles of friends and family, your story looks pretty textbook (and frankly has been paint-by-numbers predictable ever since you sold the blog and entered a new phase of navel-gazing).
To be clear, I don't for a second think that you're saying anything about your reasons for requesting a divorce that you don't, at the moment, wholeheartedly believe. But I would suggest that just as it's possible that a year, or five years, or twenty years from now, you'll feel as justified in having ended the marriage as you do today, it is equally possible that you'll find your current angst was not particularly unique or any different than what some of your harsher critics in this thread see it as.
50Lydia says:16 January 2012 at 8:15 am
I am new to your blog, as of last week, and am sorry to hear of the divorce. Never easy.
I went from a 4 bedroom house into a 1 bedroom apartment with my office in the living room. It was very "cozy". I really loved that apartment, I put a few things in storage at my dad's place (mostly sentimental items – photos, etc.). But other than that, I really didn't take much from the house (which my husband kept). It was great. A fresh start. I never considered moving into an apartment a step back, just a step in the process of life.
Best of luck to you and Kris.
52Kym says:16 January 2012 at 8:20 am
I, too, had to verify that you were writing this, JD. And I have to admit my eyes misted up a little.
I wish true happiness for you both.
54Amanda says:16 January 2012 at 8:26 am
While I am saddened by this news, I am not the least bit surprised. In addition to the more obvious subtexts in recent posts, the first red flag to me was the separate finances. I never bought the argument that "it works for us". Well, I mean I guess it did "work for you", but, to me, separate finances is just an indicator of not being committed "til death do us part".
134Rail says:16 January 2012 at 1:19 pm
Keeping finances separate does not bode disaster for a marrage. My grandparents were married 1940-2008 when my gandmother passed away.They had separate checking and savings accounts since the early 50′s. They always said it was easier to keep track of a checking balance that way, since they didnt have to wonder if one or the other had a check out that wasnt reconsiled.
169Amanda says:16 January 2012 at 4:11 pm
Your grandparent's reasoning sounds very logical and practical. But different from the mindset of JD and Kris keeping their finances completely separate and each paying their fair share of everything. Check reconciling isn't an issue for most people these days, and I"m sure doesn't apply in this case.
282Jen says:17 January 2012 at 10:42 am
I doubt that check reconciliation is no longer a problem. Sure, you can check the balance online, etc., but the checks you see online are only those that have cleared. The online account will NOT tell you about the outstanding checks your spouse wrote.
I imagine if I got married we'd have one joint account for common expenses, but keep our own accounts. And while we'd try hard to keep goo record keeping on the joint account I'm sure there'd still be a few oopsies.
175Rosa says:16 January 2012 at 4:52 pm
Thank you. That bit of magical thinking – follow the script and nothing bad can happen – is bad enough on a regular day, but jumping on a personal post like this to score "I do it better than you!" points is just rude.
300Laura says:17 January 2012 at 12:44 pm
Per my post #296, I respectfully disagree that separate finances necessarily mean lack of full commitment to a marriage. In my case, it means lack of compatibility in one area so we have a way around it. The rest works very well.
429lineargirl says:18 January 2012 at 9:52 am
To me separate finances are one of many ways to work out the difficulties of merging two lives. It's naive to think that there is only one way to be married.
531NZChick says:23 January 2012 at 12:29 am
Sorry to hear the news JD, but best wishes in this hard time for both you & Kris. I believe you have the support you need to get yourselves through this!
Regarding separate finances, my partner & I maintain separate finances, other than those directly related to goals & expenses we are both working towards. For instance we have an expense a/c which we put in a set amount each month which covers food, gas, power & internet (& other misc items). We also have another a/c for work done on our house (joint purchase of house), and then other a/cs for other goals such as our annual beach holiday, other holidays or other joint purchases we wish to save for.
This works really well for us and everything leftover after paying the joint amounts are deemed our own to look after. We offer comments on what we're currently saving for (retirement, new car, new bike, girls only holiday, boys only holiday etc) but don't criticise the others goals. I am a saver so am very happy with this arrangement, whilst he is working his way towards being far more financially savvy than when we met. He will ask for thoughts but will also offer comments if I ask for them.
As other readers have said, people often have different hobbies, some more expensive than others so this also helps us as while I'm not a 'shopper' I still have a fairly chunky hobby that I like to spend money on. I would feel guilty if I spent 'our' money on that sort of thing.
This may not work for everyone but I truly believe that you need to work through these arrangements together to find the one that suits you best, whether that be joint or separate finances.
556Bonnie says:31 January 2012 at 7:37 pm
Nzchick – You don't have separate finances. You have a combined finances mindset, but use various accounts to accomplish those goals. Just because you have separate slush funds for work lunches, hobbies, etc. doesn't mean that you have "separate finances". If you read back on J.D.'s posts about how he & Kris structured their finances, you'll see that they actually had "separate finances" (to the point that he paid her to do his laundry because it was a chore he didn't like to do).
55LisaNewton says:16 January 2012 at 8:27 am
At first, after seeing 45 other comments, I thought you'd already heard enough, but then, because I have been where you are right now (except for the "friendly" divorce part), I can relate.
It was scary for me to move out of a 2,000 square foot home into a much small apartment, but I actually found it very rewarding. It was difficult to choose the difference between "need" vs. "want," but not as hard as you might think. Upon reflection, I found it rather refreshing.
It won't take long for your to find your way, and come up with answers to the questions you know have.
Divorce is never easy, but I wish you both the best.
56Marie says:16 January 2012 at 8:29 am
I think that maybe you didn't need to tell us that "you" asked for the divorce. That could have been left unsaid.J.D.'s note: Kris wants this to be clear, and I feel it's my responsibility to own up to this.
153Betsy says:16 January 2012 at 2:22 pm
A gentleman does not relay that information. Neither would a lady, by the way.
251April Dykman says:17 January 2012 at 7:33 am
Maybe a lady doesn't want tons of advice about how she needs to save her marriage or to not be a quitter (the kind of stuff here in the comments) when the divorce wasn't her choice.
276Ohplease says:17 January 2012 at 10:19 am
A true lady and a true gentleman will not judge someone based on limited knowledge of a situation.
558tboofy says:01 February 2012 at 5:19 pm
Good for you, J.D. I would feel the same as Kris on this. Of course, in my case, my ex's new wife being 6 months pregnant (four month after our divorce was finalized) made it obvious which one of us wanted the divorce.
58Becka says:16 January 2012 at 8:39 am
Oof. I see the more judgmental GRS readers are crawling out today.
I'm very sorry to hear the news, but glad that your friendship is remaining strong, and you're still taking care of each other. I hope you manage to remain good friends. Divorce was the best thing my parents ever did for their friendship.
564greg says:10 February 2012 at 6:55 pm
"judgmental GRS readers",
Jesus Christ was judgmental. He told all who would listen not to sin or kill or commit adultery or steal…… Would you look down on him for being judgmental?
In a word, and I'll only say it in one word because it can simply be said that one word covers it: SELFISH!
566barnetto says:12 February 2012 at 9:26 am
No more so than I would look down on Yama, Hades, or Osiris for being judgmental.
60brooklynchick says:16 January 2012 at 8:44 am
Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. Although we've never spoken, somehow I feel a connection to you. Some might argue it's a fake internet connection, but I like to think it's real if odd.
I am sending both of you my best wishes and light (atheist version of prayers).
I hope this process is minimally painful. I hope you both reach out to friends and family for support.
62Kevin says:16 January 2012 at 8:47 am
So sorry to read this, J.D.. I'm saddened, but not shocked. As others have noted, there have been a few signs, such as the independent travel, and the decision to keep your finances separate.
I really admire your desire to keep things friendly, but I hope you take steps to protect yourself anyway. I've seen divorces that start out amicable, and they can turn adversarial in the blink of an eye, over the smallest things (who gets the cats? What if you don't approve of the new guy she starts dating? What if a relative trash-talks her in front of you?).
Take it slow, J.D., and watch out for yourself. Best of luck.


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42 U.S. Code § 12909 - Single room occupancy dwellings
(a) Use of grants
Grants under this section may be used to provide project-based rental assistance or grants to facilitate the development of single room occupancy dwellings. To the extent practicable, a program under this section shall be carried out in the manner provided for under section 1437f (n) [1] of this title.
(b) Limitation
Recipients under this section shall require the provision to individuals assisted under this section of the following assistance:
(2) Intensive assistance
For any individual with acquired immunodeficiency syndrome or related diseases who requires more care than can be provided in housing assisted under this section, locating a care provider who can appropriately care for the individual and referral of the individual to the care provider.
[1] See References in Text note below.
Source(Pub. L. 101–625, title VIII, § 860,Nov. 28, 1990, 104 Stat. 4381; Pub. L. 102–550, title VI, § 606(j)(7),Oct. 28, 1992, 106 Stat. 3810.)
References in Text
Section 1437f (n) of this title, referred to in subsec. (a), was repealed by Pub. L. 105–276, title V, § 550(a)(7),Oct. 21, 1998, 112 Stat. 2609.
1992—Subsec. (b)(2). Pub. L. 102–550inserted "with acquired immunodeficiency syndrome or related diseases" after "any individual".
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Ridley Scott's 'Robin Hood' To Open Cannes Film Festival
Director Ridley Scott's "Robin Hood," starring Russell Crowe in the role of the famed outlaw, will open the Cannes Film Festival on May 12.
The festival said Friday that the film will not compete for prizes.
Crowe has already teamed up with Scott many times, in "Gladiator," ''A Good Year," ''American Gangster" and "Body of Lies."
By playing Robin Hood on screen, Crowe follows in the footsteps of Errol Flynn, Sean Connery and Kevin Costner. Cate Blanchett plays his love interest, Maid Marian.
The festival runs from May 12 to 23.
Copyright 2014 by Associated Press. All rights reserved.
This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.


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Global Home >
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Associate Students
Applicants who wish to enroll in LIU Global on a non-credit basis may be admitted as Associate students. This is an ideal option for: high school graduates interested in a gap year; adult students interested in studying abroad; college graduates who did not have an opportunity to study abroad; and/or graduate students who want a global experience.
Associate students participate fully in LIU Global, making full use of the resources of the overseas centers, such as faculty advisement, help in making field research contacts, on-going support, and evaluation.
However, since no credit is awarded, nor is financial aid available to such students, tuition is on a reduced basis (approximately half of the current amount). All other expenses such as room and board, books and supplies, travel, etc. remain the same as matriculated students. Please contact the Admissions Office for more information.
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Find mentors who will tell you the truth about how your business is doing.
Know that if you launch your venture with the help of investors, you're giving away a part of your company.
And realize that to get started, you may have to use your own money – and lots of it – before applying for a bank loan.
These are some of the tips that experts gave to an audience of more than 120 current and prospective entrepreneurs Tuesday morning. The event was "Financing Your Great Idea," sponsored by ShopTalk, the Observer's print section and website for small businesses and entrepreneurs, and by Blue Cross and Blue Shield of North Carolina.
The sold-out event featured five panelists, including several small-business banking managers, an inventor who runs her own company, and a local angel investor.
Panelists spoke candidly with the audience about what it takes to get funding for an entrepreneurial venture. Here is some of what they said:
'If you're run over by a truck …'
Dan Gotte, executive director of Charlotte's Inception Micro Angel Fund – the largest angel fund in the Charlotte area – first explained the key differences among angel investors, venture capital funds and lenders.
Banks are loaning money that entrepreneurs eventually have to repay, Gotte said. Angel investors (like the ones you see on ABC's "Shark Tank") are individuals who invest their own money in a business in exchange for equity in the business. Venture capital firms, on the other hand, invest other people's money in exchange for equity, and rarely do so while a business is in infancy.
And what are angel investors' top concerns?
Scalability and sustainability, Gotte said.
Angels want to know when a business will be big enough and successful enough to be sold ("an exit" in investor-speak) for much more than the investors put in.
As for sustainability: "If you're run over by a truck, we want to know the business will continue," Gotte said.
'The ugly truth'
As a mother of nine, Robyn Pellei was chock-full of ideas that would make other parents' lives easier.
But she needed a lot more than personal experience to grow her business, ViveVita, and line of nine products, including washable chair covers and silicon bands for labeling cups, pacifiers and toothbrushes.
It's hard to start a business with a bank loan, Pellei said, which is why many entrepreneurs have to self-fund for a while before applying for a bank loan to expand.
"The ugly truth," she said, "is you're probably going to have to use credit cards and your own savings as resources. In this phase, you're spending your 401(k), … your kids' college savings. And that's how you eventually get to a banker and show, 'Here's what I've done.' "
Another precaution: Be careful with any money you're loaned, Pellei said. "It's one thing for your idea to work. It's another for it to make money, enough money to pay someone back."
Substance, not volume
John Hipp, CEO of NewDominion Bank, said every aspiring entrepreneur needs three key people on the team: a good accountant, lawyer and banker. And when finding the banker, look for one who's experienced and decisive, he said.
Hipp also said to remember that a good idea isn't enough to carry a business; working capital is a critical component.
To secure that capital, know the ins and outs of the market you're entering and how your background (or your team's background) prepares you to perform well.
"I want to know how well you know who your customers are going to be," Hipp said. "How are you going to be able to market to them? How are they going to find what you're offering?"
But keep that business plan concise, he added.
"It's less about the volume of pages than it is about substance," Hipp said.
A 10- to 15-page plan with all the necessary details is preferable to a 100-page plan with lots of graphs and charts.
'Some skin in the game'
Bill Gibson, small business banking manager for Bank of America's North Carolina market, had some tips for entrepreneurs working with a lender.
For one, he said, "make sure you're getting financial advice that's covering your business and you, personally."
And be realistic with your pitch, Gibson added. Show numbers. Study your competitors. Show how you'll compete.
As for operating a 100 percent bank-financed venture? Don't count on it, Gibson said.
"You have to have some skin in the game," Gibson said. Because when an entrepreneur has a personal investment in a business, it's all the more motivation to succeed. And, to a bank, that increases "the probability of being repaid."
Have 'a private cabinet'
Bob Marshall, Wells Fargo's business banking manager for northern Virginia, Washington and Maryland, said aspiring entrepreneurs should be looking for more than just financing. "You're also choosing a banker you feel comfortable with, who you understand and who understands you," Marshall said. "The banker isn't just interviewing you; you're interviewing them."
Marshall also suggests entrepreneurs seek out a group of mentors ("a private cabinet") who aren't afraid "to tell you things nobody else will."
McMillan: 704-358-6045 On Twitter: @cbmcmillan
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After the Museum: The Home Front 2013 at New York's Museum of Arts & Design brings together new works by more than thirty designers and collaboratives from the US to examine the interplay between cultural institutions and the design community, and propose forward-looking approaches to the post-millennial museum. The exhibition encourages audiences to reconsider traditional notions surrounding the structure and role of a design museum through a series of installations, digital initiatives, lectures, and publications.
Interdisciplinary in scope, works will include Project Projects' experimentation with prototyping art collections from major museums to democratize the acquisition of masterworks; The LAB at Rockwell Group's software toolkit for choreographing interactive spaces; and Aaron Anderson and Eric Timothy Carlson's installation of the museum director's office chair in the gallery space. Each element of After the Museum examines the dynamic relationship between design and the museum experience, highlighting its influence on product development, information sharing, and interactive programming.
On view through this Sunday, June 9.


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Published: 15.01.2009
No of pages: 432
Other Editions: Hardback
The Wagner Clan
Jonathan Carr
Through two world wars, Nazi dictatorship and foreign occupation, the Wagner clan - Germany's most famous family - has played host to many of the greatest and ghastliest figures in the arts and politics. Its members have clung to the helm of the prestigious Bayreuth festival and have regularly battled one another like warriors in the music dramas they stage. Their story - with its jealousy, greed, passion and intrigue - is as riveting as any opera.
Drawing on extensive research and interviews with the Wagners, Jonathan Carr has produced the first thorough and balanced history of this extraordinary clan and its circle. Beyond the human drama, though, this gripping portrait shows how the family's history and that of Germany has intertwined, from well before the strenuous birth of Bismarck's Reich in 1871, through defeat, destruction and post-1945 economic rebirth, right up to the present day.
The author takes a fresh look at controversial matters such as Richard Wagner's anti-semitism and the family's role during the so-called 'Third Reich'. He also underlines the decisive roles played in Bayreuth over decades by two British-born members of the clan, Houston Stewart Chamberlain and Winifred Wagner (née Williams), both of them fervent admirers of Adolf Hitler. Inspiring and appalling by turns, the Wagner saga amounts to a matchless mirror of Germany's rise, fall and resurrection over nearly two centuries.
Categorised as:
Music, Stage & Screen
Sub-categories: Classical Music
Places: Germany
Genres & Themes: Nazi Germany; Celebrity; Families; Composers; Politics
Characters: Wagner
Diana Mosley
Jan Dalley
Diana Mosley (née Mitford) had brains, beauty and charm, wealth and social position: she risked everything to follow the dark new creed of fascism when ...
My Century
Gunter Grass
A collection of one hundred inter-linked stories celebrating the twentieth century, by Germany's most eminent contemporary writer. As the sequence of stories unfolds, a ...
The Dead Man in the Bunker
Martin Pollack
In 1947, a man is found shot to death in an old military bunker, in the high mountains near the Brenner Pass that links Italy ...
Wagner Remembered
Stewart Spencer
'Nobody', wrote Samuel Johnson, 'can write the life of a man, but those who have eat and drunk and lived in social intercourse with him ...
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Discover Adionomy, Your Online Radio Advertising Campaign, Fast, Easy and Custom-Made!
Welcome to my webradio. I hope you enjoy listening to my relaxation music. It can help you reduce stress, relax and nurture body, mind and spirit.. These recordings are ideal for relaxation, self healing, meditation, yoga, massage ... http://www.thierrymorati.comListen to this radio station in your mediaplayer


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Orientation in Rome
An orientation program is held at the beginning of each semester in Rome, including a three-day orientation excursion during the second weekend. Attendance throughout the program is required for all JFRC students.
The JFRC's orientation program offers incoming students a sampling of the best that Rome has to offer. This introduction to the Eternal City includes a three-day tour to cities in Italy "off the beaten path," chosen to deepen students' immersion. Cultural workshops and Italian language sessions led by JFRC faculty and staff members help students become well-versed in the native tongue and culture of their new host country. Students gain a clearer image of the life and history of Italy by visiting cultural and historical sites, and gathering together as a community for authentic Italian meals.
Past trips have included walking tours of lesser-known Italian cities such as Gubbio, Orvieto, and Matera. Traditionally, orientation draws to an end as the community comes together for the Mass of the Holy Spirit at Chiesa Sant'Ignazio in the historical center of Rome, followed by a community dinner.
Orientation Specifics
Students who travel as a Loyola group through a group ticketing option will arrive in Rome Wednesday, January 15, 2014. Group-ticketed students will be taken by bus from Leonardo da Vinci airport to the JFRC. Students who travel independently (even if on the same flight as the group) should be prepared to take taxis to the campus and are due in Rome on these same dates and no earlier.
The purpose of the orientation excursion in and around Rome and to regions of Italy further afield is to introduce students to the cultural and linguistic diversity of Italy, to capitalize on specific aspects of the academic program of the Rome Center, and to familiarize the students with their surroundings. An effort is made to help students feel secure and at home in their new environment and to involve them in the cultural, economic, and social life of Rome. Tours, lectures, and activities are also organized throughout the year to continue the learning process and involvement in Italian and European culture.


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Comeau contributed two assists and Graf scored her first goal vs. Colorado
A national champion at Portland in 2005, Cori Alexander oversees Cal's goalkeeping corps
Four different Cal players scored goals in the Pac-12 opener
From Soccer to Biology, Kelsie Dickerson Finds Purpose in Athletics and Academics
The Golden Bears kick off against the Buffaloes Saturday at noon PT
Comeau scored two goals in Friday's 3-0 win over Pacific
Get cooking with Emily Boyd on this Inside the Lair special
Comeau recorded multiple goals for the first time in her career to carry the Bears
Friday's game is set for 1 p.m. on Goldman Field, live on Pac-12 Networks
A goal by Grace Leer in the sixth minute carried the Bears to the W
The Red Raiders scored a golden goal in the final seconds of double overtime
No. 11 Cal hosts No. 7 Texas Tech Friday and No. 24 Santa Clara Sunday


text:
Ibrahim Ferrer (February 20, 1927 – August 6, 2005) was a popular Afro-Cuban singer and musician in Cuba. He performed with many musical groups including the Conjunto Sorpresa, Orquesta Chepin-Choven and Afro-Cuban All Stars. Later in life, Ferrer became a member of the internationally successful Buena Vista Social Club.
Ibrahim Ferrer
This entry is from Wikipedia, the user-contributed encyclopedia. It may not have been reviewed by professional editors and is licensed under an Attribution-ShareAlike Creative Commons License. If you find the biography content factually incorrect, defamatory or highly offensive you can edit this article at Wikipedia. Find out more about our use of this data.
Links & Information
- Wikipedia article on Ibrahim Ferrer
- Last.fm page on Ibrahim Ferrer
- Discogs at discogs.com/artist/152232
- MusicBrainz entry on Ibrahim Ferrer
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BBC Reviews
Buenos Hermanos 2003Reviewed by Maud Hand
'Buenos Hermanos is a fest of boleros delivered with flair by Ferrer who intuitively...


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Visit Campus
If you're interested in Alma College, come visit us! Talk to a professor. Attend a class. Eat lunch in Hamilton Commons. Tour our beautiful campus. We offer a variety of visit options and are excited to help plan your Alma experience.
Weekday Visits
Visiting during the week (almost any Monday through Friday) offers a personalized schedule and campus experience. Most weekday visits include meeting with an admissions representative, taking a tour of campus and enjoying a meal on us. You can also elect to meet with a faculty member or a coach, sit in on a class, attend a campus event or even stay overnight with one of our student hosts.
Students who are interested in nursing are also invited to attend one of our Nursing Information Sessions.
Saturday Visits
Throughout the year, Explore Alma Days provide a glimpse into the Alma College experience in a small group setting. These events begin at 9:45 am and feature a session with faculty, current students and an admissions representative. A campus tour follows, and lunch concludes the day.
Additionally, we invite all Alma College Alumni and their children, siblings, and grandchildren of high school age to join us for a special Legacy Brunch during Homecoming.
Open House Events
In addition to Explore Alma Days, we offer a variety of larger open house events on select Saturdays throughout the year. These events are tailored to fit your college search process. Find out more at our registration page.
Becoming a Scot Day
Becoming a Scot Day (BASD) is an orientation day for all incoming Alma College freshmen! Not only will you register for your fall classes, but you will also learn more about fall move-in, the final steps of financial aid, have your student ID photo taken and meet other Scots in the Class of 2018!
Off Campus Events
Out-of-State & UP Visitors
We know that many of you are traveling a considerable distance to visit campus. Your time and interest is greatly appreciated. We will financially assist you with lodging, food and travel expenses. Please contact your admissions representative for details.


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Kids climb walls for candy, literally
These kids give new meaning to sugar high. They'll literally scale the walls for a sweet treat! For more go to www.jukinvideo.com.
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SHANKSVILLE, Pa. (AP) -- A somber ceremony honoring the heroism of the 40 passengers and crew aboard Flight 93 on Sept. 11 was held Saturday with a reading of their names and the ringing of bells.
Former President Bill Clinton says he and U.S. House Speaker John Boehner will mount a bipartisan effort to raise the remaining $10 million needed to completely fund the Flight 93 National Memorial, and he praised those aboard the plane as heroes who made the ultimate sacrifice.
Clinton likened their efforts to the Battle of the Alamo in Texas and the battle of Thermoplyae in ancient Greece, where defenders of both died to the last man.
He notes that the passengers who overcame the four hijackers were not soldiers, but citizens, who with almost no time acted and gave the U.S. a gift: They saved the capital from attack.
He says they saved lives and denied al-Qaida the symbolic victory of smashing the center of American government.
He says that he hopes that 2,500 years from now, their exploits
Speakers at the dedication of the first phase of the $62 million Flight 93 National Memorial also included Gordon Felt, president of Families of Flight 93. His brother Edward telephoned a friend to report the flight was being hijacked.


text: The Eye of Minds by James Dashner is a great book about a kid named Micheal who enters this virtual word called the Virtnet. In the Virtnet he can hang out with friends, play games and go on quests. However a great danger is arising and Micheal has to stop it. Will he succeed or will the lines between Virtnet and reality be blurred forever. Read The Eye of Minds to find out the answer.


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Center for Dental Informatics (CDI)
Welcome! The Center for Dental Informatics conducts research on computer applications in dental practice, education and research. CDI is part of the Center for Biomedical Informatics/School of Medicine. The Center for Biomedical Informatics offers a postgraduate program in dental informatics leading to an MS or PhD degree.
New to dental informatics? Check out our "What is dental informatics? section.
Are you ...
- ... a student? If so, you might be interested in our research areas, Practicum and Thesis Opportunities, Dental Informatics Internship, and Dental Informatics Postgraduate Program.
- ... a faculty member? If so, you might be interested in our research areas, publications, faculty and staff members, and news items.
- ... just looking for information about dental informatics in general? Check out "What is dental informatics?," research areas, publications and news.
Some highlights about our Center:
- Latest News (10/9/2011): Center for Dental Informatics recruits for Postdoctoral Associate position and MS/PhD/postdoc training positions in dental informatics.
- Titus Schleyer elected to the American College of Medical Informatics.
- We are recruiting for MS/PhD/postdoc candidates for our program. Help shape the future of informatics in healthcare!
- Visit the National Library of Medicine-funded Dental Informatics Online Community to find out how you can network with people interested in dental informatics worldwide.
- Our Publications page provides access to over 65 peer-reviewed papers, one book, and several proceedings and journal issues authored/edited by faculty.
- For individuals interested in dental informatics, we provide internship, practicum and thesis opportunities.
- The NIH-funded postgraduate program in dental informatics is offered through the Department of Biomedical Informatics.
- Access our Guidelines for the Design of Educational Software.


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SPOKANE, Wash. (AP) — Police and state troopers are looking for a car with significant damage that left the scene of a collision on Highway 195 Wednesday night in Spokane.
The crash sent the 54-year-old driver of the other car to a hospital with serious injuries.
Information from: KREM-TV, http://www.krem.com/