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Take notice. Pay attention. Be aware.
That's the third of the 5 Ways to Wellbeing, and it's one I write about constantly.
So far in this series we've looked at connecting and being active. Still to come: Keep Learning and Give.
But today we have
naming of parts taking notice.
(That was a poetry joke. There's another one later – see if you spot it. And did you notice what I just did there?)
Why taking notice is important
What you pay attention to shapes your brain, and your brain shapes your experience.
I say "brain" and I mean "brain". It shapes your mind as well, of course, but your brain physically changes when you consistently pay attention. Whether it's a practice of meditation (which is a deliberate way of paying attention in order to shape your experience), or whether it's a daily habit of complaining, what you take notice of is what constructs your world.
And what you don't take notice of is what controls you.
You have several brains (despite what your friends may occasionally say), and one of them is kind of like a crocodile's. It can identify, by a primitive kind of pattern-matching, which of the three "Fs" a situation calls for: fighting, fleeing or mating. Beyond this level it gets a bit lost. Just as trolls count "one, two, three, many", the crocodile brain goes "fight, run, mate, too complicated".
If you don't pay attention to it, the crocodile will control you.
Another of your brains is a bit like a rabbit's. It lives in a kind of eternal now, in a mist of ever-changing emotions, each of which is total reality for as long as it lasts.
It has a bit more range than the croc: it can do sadness as well as fear and anger, but it still relies on primitive pattern-matching to decide whether this person I see before me is someone to nurture or to be nurtured by, to run from or to attack, to eat or to have sex with.
If you don't pay attention to it, the rabbit will control you.
You have a brain in your gut, as well, because digestion is a complex matter and needs its own brain. It's linked in with the brain in your head, to the crocodile and the rabbit, and signals them using both nerves and body chemistry. The crocodile and the rabbit experience these signals about the state of the digestion as moods and desires, some of which have no obvious connection with food.
If you don't pay attention to it, the gut will control you.
There's another brain outside your head, too. It's called your culture. It remembers lots of things (not always very accurately), but it's not that great at conscious thought. Despite this, it constantly helps you to decide what to do, because it's not only outside your head, it's also inside your head, speaking in the voices of the people who raised you. (More and more these days that includes people who you only saw or heard on the television.)
If you don't pay attention to it, the crowd will control you.
photo credit: JD Hancock
Taking notice changes your life
The only brain you have that thinks consciously is the heavily-grooved, small-melon-sized, grey squishy thing wrapped round the rabbit, which is wrapped round the crocodile. Even then, it's mainly the front part that is really conscious and makes decisions, and only some of the (usually) left side that does rationality and words. Relative to the rest of the brains, your rational, conscious part is heavily outweighed.
Fortunately, you don't have to be big when you're smart.
The rabbit and the crocodile can only pattern-match, and then act based on the match that comes up. But the conscious mind can reflect on causes, consequences, alternative explanations. It can question whether that match really was a match. It can insert a small, but growing pause for thought between the pattern-match and the reaction, between the idea and the reality, between the motion and the act, between the emotion and the response.
That means that the croc, the bunny, the gut and the crowd aren't in control any more. They have a voice, they even have a vote, but they can be overruled by the Speaker.
How to take notice
The New Economics Foundation has some good advice on taking notice.
Be curious. Catch sight of the beautiful. Remark on the unusual. Notice the changing seasons. Savour the moment, whether you are walking to work, eating lunch or talking to friends. Be aware of the world around you and what you are feeling. Reflecting on your experience will help you appreciate what matters to you.
Here are seven specific suggestions.
- When you see something beautiful, interesting, unusual or odd, say something about it (to yourself, if necessary).
- Keep a journal and record things you notice.
- Take photographs. Start a daily photographic log. It can transform your seeing.
- Keep a mood diary. Record anything that might affect your mood – exercise, food, weather, medication, circumstances – and your mood rating on a 1-10 scale. Read over it once a month or so and draw conclusions.
- Blog about personal development! (It works for me. I'm always thinking about the significance of things I see, do and experience, because I know I'll need something to write about.)
- Take up a meditation practice which involves paying attention. At its simplest, spend 10 minutes a day noticing your breathing.
- Each day, choose a routine thing, a part of your day that's become "background", and foreground it. Ask why you do that, who put that there, what that's all about. Do observational comedy on it!
How are you going to cultivate a habit of taking notice, paying attention, reflecting and being aware?
Do you want to be amazing? Become an Amazing Member and get immediate access to member-only resources like the How to be Happy ebook.
(I naturally won't pass your email address on to anyone else.)


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Pedestrians and pedestrian safety are in the news, and Arlington is on the case.
Last month, Transportation for America released Dangerous by Design, its annual study of pedestrian fatalities in America's urban centers. According to the study, more than 47,000 pedestrians were killed in the United States in the last decade, the equivalent of a jumbo jet full of passengers crashing about once a month. The study indicated an overwhelming proportion of pedestrian fatalities occur on roads lacking safe sidewalks, crosswalks, and signals. In addition, Americans older than 65, children, and minorities are killed or injured in disproportionate numbers.
This study relates to a recent report by NPR that looks at the growth of the senior population and the need for making cities accessible through safer roads and sidewalks.
And the senior population isn't the only group at a disadvantage when it comes to sidewalk and road safety. The disabled population is as much at risk when it comes to safety and of course, accessibility. According to the Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation, many cities aren't "accessible" for people using wheelchairs. The Foundation looked at 100 of the largest cities in the United States and ranked them based on "criteria that provides a snapshot of not just accessibility, but livability for people using wheelchairs." They came up with a list of twenty cities that offer hospitable environments for people in wheelchairs. Arlington County, Virginia is one of the twenty cities on that list.
Arlington County succeeds as a pedestrian friendly community because of its commitment to instilling positive values and best practices as well as pedestrian advocacy efforts. One such effort is the County's Pedestrian Advisory Committee. The Committee is made up of volunteers who keep the County focused on making Arlington a better place to walk. They advise the County Board and the County Manager on the implementation of the Pedestrian Transportation Plan and other pertinent matters the Committee deems important, and they advocate for the needs of pedestrians in Arlington.
The Committee holds regular meetings at Courthouse Plaza, open to the public. The next Pedestrian Advisory Committee meeting is TONIGHT --Wednesday, June 8 at 7:00 p.m. To learn more about the Pedestrian Advisory Committee or why Arlington County has been designated a walk friendly community, visit WalkArlington.com.

subset: commoncrawl


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At 'The Onion,' Of Course, It's Just Tuesday
Before you believe much of anything today -- April 1 -- read about the Top 100 April Fools Jokes of All Time.
« March 2003 | Main | May 2003 »
Before you believe much of anything today -- April 1 -- read about the Top 100 April Fools Jokes of All Time.
The Alliance for Downtown New York will be installing free wireless internet access in parks all over lower Manhattan, the NYTimes reports today.
Starting May 1, you'll be able to get free bandwidth at City Hall Park, Bowling Green, South Street Seaport, Liberty Plaza, Rector Park, and the Vietnam Veteran's Plaza. Byrant Park is already "wired." The paper also reports that someone is providing wireless access in Tompkins Square Park and Madison Square Park -- near the Ziff Davis offices, by the way. From the Times:
NYC Wireless has mapped 141 such hot spots in the New York City area, where individuals or companies make their networks available for public use. Another nonprofit organization, the Public Internet Project, mapped more than 13,000 places in Manhattan alone where signals from home or office wireless networks can be detected and used by a computer user.
Edwin Starr passed away the other day. He was a soul shouter with a killer band and only three hits, but my oh my what hits:
One of my reference books describes "War", from 1970, as "cataclysmic," which is as good a description as any. Where Marvin Gaye talked about how "only love can conquer hate," and the Temptations sang their complex and wordy "Ball of Confusion," and Crosby Stills Nash & Young decried "Four dead in Ohio," Starr cut to the chase. The chorus was as simple as can be: "War! Huh! What is it good for? Absolutely nothin'!"
The chart underneath it swung from snare clicks to punching horns to snarling guitars. It was impossible to ignore the song as it came pouring out of the radio -- as impossible as it is to imagine such a song being programmed on any major station today.
If that were all Edwin Starr did, he's be worth remembering. But there was also "Twenty Five Miles." It's the story of a guy counting down the 25 miles he's walking to see his baby again, but it inexplicably fades out as the singer's got 5 more miles to go. Why? Was the song too long for radio? What happened? Did he ever get there? Was she waiting for him?
If I ever get to front a soul band, with the horns and the chick backup singers and the whole deal, I'm going to find me a chart for "Twenty Five Miles," and that's what I'll sing. I might even make up the last five.
1. Can you burn a scarecrow in effigy?
2. Do observant Jews ride piggyback?
Peggy Noonan has a pretty fair column today about unashamed patriotism, but she gets tangled up.
In the late 1960s a lot of young people and liberals thought you were a dope to love your country, "to wave the flag." But that is also the precise moment that American flag lapel pins first became popular. When a local businessman wore one of them, it was as if he were wearing a sign that said "I support my country, and if you don't like it, that's too bad."
Twenty five years ago at CBS News a major network star said to a newsroom friend of mine, who still wore his pin, "I wish I could wear one of those." But, he explained, it might be "misinterpreted." My friend thought, but did not say: Yes, it would be interpreted in a way that suggested you love your country. How terrible.
It's a very nice column, and it puts its finger on something important. But Noonan elides something else important: how and why that CBSer thought that a flag pin would be "mis-interpreted."
In many ways over the last umpteen years -- probably starting with the Vietnam protests, but I'm of an age where it might have started earlier and I didn't notice -- the flag has been co-opted as a symbol of the Right. More accurate: the Left rejected it as part of its anti-war rhetoric, and the Right was more than happy to take the symbol and run with it.
Rather than a patriotic symbol, the flag too often is used as a symbol to advance a partisan agenda. David Letterman got it right once: he noticed that as the election got closer, Dubya would put more and more flags on his rostrum; as a response and a gag, Letterman started putting flags behind him, more and more, until his stage was full of them. All the while, he was running clips that showed how the Republicans were quite literally covering themselves with the flag, more each day.
Call me a cynic, but I'm enough of a journalist and enough of a history student to know that when someone starts waving flags, it's time to start listening. When someone insists that you wave flags, it's time to start fighting.
I love my country. I wore a flag pin after 9-11 because it was the only appropriate gesture I could think of. I won't wear one now because I think the politicians running my country are wrong in just so many ways.
If wearing a flag pin can raise that kind of issue, the guy from CBS is right to not wear one.
And if someone can call him unpatriotic because he doesn't wear one -- and if the allegation can be met with anything else but a snort -- that's only evidence that he's right.
April is always tough, between taxes, Passover, Holy Week, and the hangover and cleanup from the same. We now resume our regular posting.
After digging and thinking for four years, journalism students at the University of Illinois Champaign-Urbana think they've figured out the identity of Watergate figure Deep Throat.
If you had that weasel Pat Buchanan in the office pool, like Dateline NBC did, you're wrong. If you had John Dean, you're warmer, but not quite on the mark.
This has been a Washington parlor game for going on 30 years. Woodward and Bernstein themselves say they won't tell until Deep Throat dies. But these students have assembled what looks like a pretty good guess.
This page contains all entries posted to Over the Edge in April 2003. They are listed from oldest to newest.
March 2003 is the previous archive.
May 2003 is the next archive.
Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.


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I'm the opposite of moderate, immaculately polished with the spirit of a hustler and the swagger of a college kid.
www.facebook.com/Mic... - 390 followers
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Gianna Heeled Suede Short Boots 13 13
Great fall boot! I ordered these boots on sale as a back-to-school treat for myself. I am a 10 and sized up to an 11 based on reviews. They fit well, though a bit long in the toe. I bought the Orange Poppy and LOVE the color but ultimately exchanged for the camel as it is more versatile. The suede is beautiful and they feel comfortable for walking around town or the office. I had no problems with the zipper at all. September 14, 2014
Nice cross seasonal boot Even though I haven't really taken them on a long walk yet, they seemed to pretty comfy in a test drive stroll around the house. Yes, order up if you are between sizes, especially for larger sizes. I did not find them narrow at all- though I have long narrow feet. Nicely constructed, rich suede- though I found the camel actually lighter than appeared in photo. Excellent value when on sale- worth the price if you need them now. September 9, 2014
The Color Makes Them A Keeper As far as style goes, they are nothing really unique, but I bought them for the color - teal - which is gorgeous! Can wear with summer skirts /dresses, but will also work into fall to spice up my jeans and leggings. Not the most comfy boots I have ever worn, I am even a little worried they will hurt if I wear them for extended periods, but oh well, we suffer for fashion, right? They definitely run narrow (all my shoes are medium width), do order up one size if you like some wiggle room, have bunions, or want to wear a thicker sock. August 29, 2014
But the color... Boots are comfortable, I don't notice the narrownesss but they're slightly short, so the 1/2-size up recommendation in the description is good. But the color (I got the blue) is not at all as shown--much greener and paler than the rich turquoise blue shown in the photo. Not yet sure whether I'll keep them. If I'd paid full price they'd definitely go back. August 22, 2014
get compliments all the time On the sale price, these boots are well worth it. I got the boots in orange and they add a fun pop to otherwise boring jeans-and-sweater outfits. People complement me on them just about every time I wear them. I see other reviewers thought the fit was narrow. For me, the fit around the foot is normal, but they did feel slightly tight around the ankle at first. That slight tightness (not uncomfortable,for me anyway) went away after a few wears. August 18, 2014
Love these boots! The cement color is divine. I appreciate the information that they ran small and ordered a half size up. Just right. These boots can be dressed up or down. great buy on sale July 26, 2014
Product:30727-Gianna Heeled Suede Short Boots


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BURNSVILLE, Minn. (AP) -- Family and friends of a missing University of Minnesota student continue to look for the 20-year-old woman while police are warning that public participation in a search could compromise a possible crime scene.
The family of Anarae Schunk says the greatest potential contamination of any possible evidence is time. The Star Tribune says Schunk's family is asking for "all hands on deck to bring her home safely."
Schunk has been missing since early Sunday after she was seen with her ex-boyfriend, Anthony Lee Nelson, at Nina's Grill in Burnsville. Nelson is charged with fatally shooting Palagor Obang Jobi in the parking lot after they'd gotten in a fight because Nelson was angry that he was talking to his girlfriend. That woman, Ashley Conrade, is charged with harboring Nelson at her townhouse until his arrest Tuesday.
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NORFOLK -- Some air conditioning units break down in this extreme heat, and you can bet it has repair orders piling up.
Brian Hice says the mild winter slowed down work down for them as far as heating repairs, but says things have certainly turned around and he's now working long hours. He was out in the heat Friday fixing broken A/C units.
At one Hampton home, he was able to diagnose the problem right away. He said a capacitor was blown and ultimately led to just having warm air blowing around.
"A lot of times that happens - brownouts. Every A/C in the neighborhood is running, the voltage drops down. It's called a brownout. The capacitor can't handle it," described Hice.
At Paul Suzlberger's house, the air conditioning went out about 4:30 Thursday afternoon.
"It was rough sleeping in here, really rough. It got hot. Oh yeah, no air moving at all except the fans," Suzlberger said. "When I was younger, when you're young, you can put up with it."


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If you look on the iTunes homepage, there is a tab that says, "Free on iTunes". Click on that and scroll to the "Featured TV Shows" tab. Under that is the episode.
I'm guessing it's free in honor of the Olympics because the episode is when Rose and the Doctor travel to 2012 to see the Olympics.
We forgot to mention this. We're sorry. We're so sorry.
Free for a limited time only courtesy of BBC America! CLICKY!!!
(via somethingsmartrighthere)
I approve.


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I want to dimension an arc by its arc length using Inventor 2009. When I select the arc and right click the only dimension options available are diameter and radius. How can I expand these options, or is there another way to dimension by arc length?
Solved! Go to Solution.
Solved! by JDMather. See the answer in context.
smg5101 wrote:
... or is there another way to dimension by arc length?
Are you in ipt sketch or in idw or dwg?
You could update to later release.
In sketch - see attached.
Never mind - I can't fine my example file from back then.
It involved creating a parameter to control arc length in sketch, based on the formula for circumference of a circle.
I am in the sketch mode of a .ipt file.
Check this thread
Currently Inventor 2013 supports to create arc length dimension directly, please see the attached image "ArcLength".
For the old release, we could use the formula like Arc Length=PI*Radius*Angle/180, please see the attached image "Formula".
Hope it helpful for you!


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Virginia Tech Football: Report Card Grades for the Hokies' Win Against Miami
Source: Bleacher Report NCAAF - Oct 9, 2011 at 8:01 PM
If you heard a loud roar yesterday around 7 p.m. Eastern time, it was probably from the crowd at Lane Stadium watching the Hokies take down Miami at home to keep their hopes of reaching another ACC championship game within reach.It's hard to explain, really, how an offense can play so bad one week and then look incredible the next. The credit has to go to the coaching staff and to the players to rebound like they did. That being said, there are still a few concerns, mostly because of injuries for the Hokies moving forward.Here's how the Hokies graded out against their win over Miami.Begin Slideshow


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Genre: Historical Romance
Ian McCains assignment for General Sam Houston is to find out the real identity of San Antonio Rose. Is she really trying to help the Texans gain their
San Antonio Rose is Emerada de la Rosa, bent on avenging the murder of her family by Santa Ana. She gives Houston warnings about the Mexicans movements. She also saves Ians life several times, at considerable risk to
Sweeping from war-torn Texas to
Reviewed By: Evelyn Feiner
Publisher: Leisure
Published: September 1999


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The practice of yoga is often associated with flexibility. It is common to think that you should practice yoga to increase your range of movement and motion. The physical practice of Yoga is certainly great for increasing flexibility, but truly is just a gateway to so much more. Yoga is the path to Love.
I love when I have breakthroughs in yoga; they are really breakthroughs in life. What generally starts as a physical breakthrough soon translates into emotional, intellectual and spiritual breakthroughs.
While practicing Ashtanga yoga, I had an amazing breakthrough in downward facing dog. This pose is one of the first that you will learn in many styles of yoga. From the outside it appears that your hands are shoulders distance apart and your feet are hips distance apart while you press evenly though your hands and fingers and lift your hips high while pressing your feet down low to create length in the spine. As if that isn't enough, there is a whole inner spiral going on with your thighs and outward spiral with the shoulders moving down and back and be sure to breath.
The best part is that downward facing dog is designed to be a resting pose. After 15 years of practicing yoga, yesterday it clicked. If I really push my femurs into the socket and engage the joint, I can create an anchor to safely move deeper into lengthening my hamstrings. Suddenly, it made perfect sense. Not only, could I move deeper into the muscles, but engaging the joints brings freshly-oxygenated blood there to strengthen and rejuvenate the tissue. I could actually feel this process happening.
It is the solid connection between a table top and table legs that allow it to withstand loads of weight and pressure without breaking. If the screws are loose, the whole assembly will crash under the slightest of pressure. The same is true of your personal relationships. It is the heart connection that creates the stability, trust, structure and longevity. Showing up in spirit will allow your relationship to stand the test of time. To just show up in body alone, is the equivalent of a table top balanced on 4 legs or downward dog without solid joint engagement. It may appear like a table, but will crumble when the wind blows. It may appear like downward facing dog, but you are shortchanging your potential.
If I can make amazing breakthroughs in yoga after practicing daily for 15 years, I challenge you to make breakthroughs in your personal relationships today. Just as downward facing dog is a resting pose, your personal relationship is where you connect to stretch, anything else is a struggle against the most natural feeling in the world~ Love. So ask yourself, if you have been showing up completely engaged to yoga on your mat and yoga off your mat. Notice where you can improve the quality of your practice today.
Allow your body to be your teacher. The way you move is the way you live. Being Happy Healthy and Fit means knowing the best time to be fully engaged is right here, right Now.


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After reading the book series, scouring it for little nuances and countless views of the movies i was left like most of you wanting more. i didn't want to just write fan fiction though, i'm not S.M. i didn't want to try to expound on her dream of how Twilight developed and concluded. so what to do? how bout something new that still FELT like Twilight. something that paid it tribute but was completely new.
After about a year of writing i finished my first series, "Waking…Continue
Added by kt bradley on June 11, 2013 at 9:59pm — 1 Comment
Have you ever thought about what would would have happpened if twilight instead of being a movie it was a tv show. Who would play bella and edward? The other question is what would have happened if Taylor Lautner wasn't in the movie would the character Jacob still be as popular as he is now. Some people say they like the books better and that when they made the movie they left out some important facts that were…Continue
Added by Angel20395 on June 8, 2012 at 11:12pm — 2 Comments
-Aro...look at her she has almost no blood- asked the men in the right side
-Marcus,i know what i'm doing...Demetri, Felix, get this cute poppy out of here
I start screaming, seconds later i was in a dark room and those pale mans…Continue
Added by Reborn (Marie) on March 4, 2012 at 1:30pm — 1 Comment
Chapter 2: Voracious Desire of Salvation…Continue
Added by Reborn (Marie) on March 4, 2012 at 12:00pm — 1 Comment
I didn´t enjoy the travel cause i spent the half of it sleeping, but when we arrive to Leonardo Da Vinci Airport i had that feeling of that this trip would not be okay, but i didn´t pay attention to it, i was in Italy and i was decided to make this birthday, the best of all. But the destiny had another plans.
-Mom, where are…Continue
Added by Reborn (Marie) on March 4, 2012 at 9:08am — No Comments
Ok i always wanted to make a book and now i have an idea, it have the characters of twilight, but the main character is Agathe.... enjoy it!!
Chapter 1: Travel
-Agathe...- Said my mom after a very bored night- Can i go in?
-Yeah- i said -of…Continue
Added by Reborn (Marie) on March 3, 2012 at 12:58pm — No Comments
Added by Maya Rose on July 19, 2011 at 7:30am — No Comments
It seems that dreams create stories, but dreaming that one day you will be a writer seems to be so far away or at least for me. I have been writing my stories since December 2008. One book turned into five, then a dream turned into a trilogy, and another dream truned into two books. So if you can count, that is ten books, that someday I hope to finish the strories and have them publish. My first series I have to finish first, but because so much goes into this series with them being from the…Continue
Added by Heather Marie T on June 25, 2011 at 8:30pm — 1 Comment
Im really bummed to know that after the breaking dawn movies are over. . . there will be no more twilight.
I mean, WE TWILIGHTERs want more right?
i hope Stephenie…Continue
Added by Ma. Daphne Crystal C. Umali on April 24, 2011 at 7:30am — 2 Comments
It was the morning after I found out we have to leave. I…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on November 9, 2010 at 2:25pm — 3 Comments
Chapter 12
Nic's pov
I know who she is.…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on November 2, 2010 at 1:30pm — 1 Comment
(sorry this chapter has a lot of switching points of views but I want you to be able to see it from all angles. So you can get to see how they all think. You never know there could be a surprise in here for you.)…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on October 3, 2010 at 6:00am — 3 Comments
"look Jake I'm sorry I didn't mean it" Seth said for the, like…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on October 1, 2010 at 12:41pm — 6 Comments
* Nicole's pov
I don't know why but when we got of the plane I…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on October 1, 2010 at 8:01am — 5 Comments
Adams pov
It surprised me when Nicole held my hand to the airport…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on September 28, 2010 at 11:39am — 3 Comments
I woke up to the sweet sound of birds singing outside my window,…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on September 26, 2010 at 10:18am — 4 Comments
Chapter 1.
*buzz buzz buzz* AAARGH…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on September 25, 2010 at 7:38am — 6 Comments
I could tell Mollie was afraid of the answer, her facial expression…Continue
Added by Jessiica Cooper :D on September 25, 2010 at 7:34am — 8 Comments
Strangers in the Night
I wiped my hair with a towl and took a hair drier out of cupboard. I dried my hair so they haven't been totally wet. Then I went to my bedroom.
I left my folding door, that led to the terrace, open, so I would get some air to my small bedroom. Then I wrapped into a blanket and turned off the light.
When I was lying in the dark, I got a feeling that something bad will happen. That thought gave me the shudders and I couldn't fall…Continue
Added by K. E. B. on August 4, 2010 at 6:00am — 5 Comments
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My half-Asian husband forwarded me this article written by a Chinese mother about why they are superior to Western-style mothers.
It is fascinating to read and I see so much of this in how my husband was raised. But I also see her depiction of the Western parent – ME!
Here are excerpts from the article. I beg you to take the time to read the entire thing!! It is really worth your time! (You HAVE to read the story about her daughter and the piano and it's toward the end.)
"A lot of people wonder how Chinese parents raise such stereotypically successful kids. They wonder what these parents do to produce so many math whizzes and music prodigies, what it's like inside the family, and whether they could do it too. Well, I can tell them, because I've done it. Here are some things my daughters, Sophia and Louisa, were never allowed to do:
• attend a sleepover
• have a playdate
• be in a school play
• complain about not being in a school play
• watch TV or play computer games
• choose their own extracurricular activities
• get any grade less than an A
• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama
• play any instrument other than the piano or violin
• not play the piano or violin…."
"Despite our squeamishness about cultural stereotypes, there are tons of studies out there showing marked and quantifiable differences between Chinese and Westerners when it comes to parenting. In one study of 50 Western American mothers and 48 Chinese immigrant mothers, almost 70% of the Western mothers said either that "stressing academic success is not good for children" or that "parents need to foster the idea that learning is fun." By contrast, roughly 0% of the Chinese mothers felt the same way. Instead, the vast majority of the Chinese mothers said that they believe their children can be "the best" students, that "academic achievement reflects successful parenting," and that if children did not excel at school then there was "a problem" and parents "were not doing their job." Other studies indicate that compared to Western parents, Chinese parents spend approximately 10 times as long every day drilling academic activities with their children. By contrast, Western kids are more likely to participate in sports teams."
"What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you're good at it. To get good at anything you have to work, and children on their own never want to work, which is why it is crucial to override their preferences. This often requires fortitude on the part of the parents because the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning, which is where Western parents tend to give up. But if done properly, the Chinese strategy produces a virtuous circle. Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence; rote repetition is underrated in America. Once a child starts to excel at something—whether it's math, piano, pitching or ballet—he or she gets praise, admiration and satisfaction. This builds confidence and makes the once not-fun activity fun. This in turn makes it easier for the parent to get the child to work even more."
The author says that she sees three major differences in the Chinese view of rearing kids and the Western view.
1. Western parents are very concerned about their children's self-esteem.
2. Chinese parents believe that their kids owe them everything.
3. Chinese parents believe that they know what is best for their children and that overrides all of their children's own desires and preferences.
I am all about their egos and wanting them to be happy whole people. Don't get me wrong, I want and expect them to have As (I know what their IQs are! They had better get As!) However, it is important to me that they are happy and feel good about themselves.
I would have absolutely sided with Jed on the piano example. Maybe the child just wasn't mature enough to do it. That mom was hardcore! That's just not me. But does that mean Western kids will be failures? Should we not worry about their egos so much? Or is that how kids get into drugs and such when they feel badly about themselves? (See I immediately go to they are going to do drugs or have sex and get pregnant.)
OK, so what do you guys think? Do the "Chinese" mothers have the right idea? Are Western parents going about this all wrong? What role should their ego play? How much should you push? How much choice do they have?
If you are not a crazy strict parent, can you become one? Is that going against your own grain? Will that somehow backfire — like you're working against the personality that God intended you to have with your kids?
January 10th, 2011
12:38 am
I think so level of balance is a good thing. Western mothers do tend to worry too much about children's self-esteem, praising every little thing and trying to smooth over any area where the child isn't doing well instead of urging the child to work harder.
Western mothers also seem to think they owe their kids a lot. We owe our kids love and a stable family but I don't think we owe them the opportunity to try every activity that is available, nor do we owe them the latest fads and electronics.
However, I do think Chinese mothers do put a little too much pressure on their children. I remember reading a study about suicide rates among teens in China. Chinese mothers do produce academically talented kids but where is the creativity and thinking out of the box that is needed to create solutions for the future?
I think balance is the key. Don't worry about their self-esteem to the extreme. Don't let them influence your decisions too much. Expect their best effort and praise the effort instead of praising innate intelligence. Don't emphasize academics to the exclusion of all else, leave room for a few, well-chosen activities.
January 10th, 2011
12:48 am
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January 10th, 2011
1:05 am
I also think you have to find a balance and you have to take your child's personality and strengths and weaknesses into account. I agree with the Chinese mothers that it shouldn't ALL be about self esteem, but I do think some of it should foster self esteem. I remember a dear friend of mine, who I used to teach with, came back to start teaching at my old school after two years in Beijing. She said that every morning before the children arrive, a huge blackboard is posted at the entrance ranking every child in every grade from the best to the worst. Everyone sees this board and the kids, of course, have all sorts of issues with pride, parental approval and social acceptance tied up in it. Would I want that in my child's school? NO! Not everyone is blessed with the same amount of innate intelligence, so I don't know why Donny the 5th grader who is a "slow learner" should be humiliated because Chloe the 5th grader is "gifted." However, I do think as parents we need to be fairly rigid and firm regarding our expectations. If you have a slow learner, your expectations will be different than those of a gifted or exceptionally intelligent child.
I think a huge problem with Western parents is that so many of them have little to no involvement with their child's education. They literally expect the school to take care of it all. This transcends every economic category and social level. Very few parents in the Western world really make their kids "tow a line" and those who do are often ridiculed for it. I see no problem in letting your kid know what he's doing well and what he needs to work on to succeed. This can be done without humiliation or harming of self esteem.
Personally I think the biggest harm to self esteem is when a kid is told that he's doing a great job forever at something, and then he comes to a situation where he's asked to perform a task with a bunch of others. He fails at the task because no one wanted to damage his precious self esteem and let him know he was NEVER doing a good job at it! Talk about a humiliating memory! Gently let your kids know when they need help and improvement -it doesn't have to be mean or damaging. My 4 year old is doing GREAT with writing his letters and starting to read, but that doesn't mean I need to tell him, "GOOD JOB" when he thinks he spelled "tree" but instead wrote 14 different kinds of letters. Instead, I tell him -"Hey-you're doing a really fantastic job writing letters, but we need to work on spelling. The letters you wrote don't spell 'tree' but they are written very neatly and nicely." There's definitely a balance to find -I just wish more Western parents would involve themselves in SOME way!
January 10th, 2011
1:21 am
[...] Please be sure to read the blog below all about how Chinese mother are superior to Western mothers. … [...]
January 10th, 2011
1:33 am
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Heather Wintz. Heather Wintz said: Why Chinese mothers are superior (could also be titled why Western …: That mom was hardcore! That's just not m… http://bit.ly/g0kb4R [...]
January 10th, 2011
4:41 am
[...] in USABC NewsWoman Argues That Shaming Children is 'Superior' ParentingNew York MagazineWhy Chinese mothers are superior (could also be entitled why Western mothers …Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)Village Voice (blog) -Shanghaiist -Washington Postall [...]
January 10th, 2011
4:43 am
Let's remember that we can't generalize an entire race of people.
I'm a Chinese-American (both my parents immigrated from China; I was born in the USA) and my mother was NOTHING like this crazy mother who raised her kids like that.
She is a MONSTER!
The way she raised her kids is OUTRAGEOUS and not the mainstream Chinese or Asian way.
She is clearly an extremist and it is mothers like her who cause kids to commit suicide when they don't succeed.
January 10th, 2011
4:46 am
When I was younger I tend to disagree with the way my parents treated me when it comes to this. I was not alone though, some friends(chinese) also used to voice their disatisfaction about how their moms keep pushing them to do better at school or to pursued only a certain degree when it comes to college. Anyway, fast forward a decade later after high school, whatever complains we have back then are now replaced by us holding a good jobs and having a great life. And we thanked our parents for keep pushing us otherwise we wouldn't have been where we are!
January 10th, 2011
5:03 am
As a Chinese person (Chinese-American) I can tell you that I am very outraged by this woman's book — the essay is excerpted from her book. Why am I outraged?
Two reasons:
1) Advocating this type of parenting style is just wrong. So very wrong! It is so very harmful to the
kids. It is mothers like her who create very successful but very UNHAPPY individuals. And what
is the point if you are unhappy? It is mothers like her who cause straight-A over-achieving kids to
commit suicide when they don't succeed at something.
2) She is saying that her parenting style is the mainstream Chinese way and that mothers like
her are the norm among Chinese mothers, and that is so not the case at all. Her parenting style
is not the mainstream Chinese way and as a mother she is not the norm among Chinese
mothers but an extremist. I know as I'm Chinese and my mother and none of my Chinese
cousins or friends had a mother like her. None! And my grandmothers were not like that to my
parents. My parents immigrated to the US from China when they were in their late
20s and I was born in the US. THIS WOMAN IS OBVIOUSLY AT THE MOST EXTREME END
People believe in stereotypes all the time and sadly this woman's book will help spread
the sterotype that Chinese mothers are unbelievably strict pushy cruel anti-fun anti-freedom
anti-individualism mothers, which is totally not true at all.
January 10th, 2011
7:06 am
George Lee, I agree that this is a generalization of Chinese moms and not all Chinese moms are like that. But, this couldn't have been true-r if she's originally from Singapore or Malaysia(going by her last name,Chua, and that she speaks Hokkien). I only said so for I'm a Malaysian-chinese myself, and most of the malaysian or singaporean-chinese friends or parents I know are close to what she is like.
January 10th, 2011
7:42 am
@George -thanks! I meant to include in my original post that I know some Chinese mothers and I know some grown children of Chinese mothers and they aren't like this! There are parents of every race and ethnicity who create extremely rigid lives and expectations for their kids. The list of what this woman never allowed her children to do just makes me think of her, not as a Chinese mother, but as a B**CH!
January 10th, 2011
8:10 am
If you consider having the highest suicide rate among any ethnic group "successful" then yeah, I guess Asian kids are successful. But many of them are depressed and miserable despite their Ivy League degrees because of the cultural and familial expectations they are burdened with.
I'd rather have my child be happy in a modest job than miserable with a Ph.D.
January 10th, 2011
8:13 am
I'd have to agree that "Western" mothers are a little lax vs. Chinese regarding education. We need to do SOMETHING about the sorry state of education here in GA. I am all for separating kids out by ability level so the teachers can actually teach vs. babysit because little Johnny has an IEP and really shouldn't be in the class anyway. I do think Chinese mothers go too far to the extreme though. I agree on the previous comments stressing balance, with maybe a little lean in her direction for strictness and educational achievement. The other things she won't let them do (plays, sleepovers) just produce a child with little to no social skills.
January 10th, 2011
8:44 am
[...] in USABC NewsWoman Argues That Shaming Children is 'Superior' ParentingNew York MagazineWhy Chinese mothers are superior (could also be entitled why Western mothers …Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)Village Voice (blog) -Seattle Post Intelligencer [...]
January 10th, 2011
9:09 am
@ mary:
I'd rather have my child be happy in a modest job than miserable with a Ph.D.
I agree! Yes, this is true. BUT if you cannot be happy because you are constantly behind in your bills as you do not have a job that will pay enough for you to live comfortably…is that happy? I am not talking extravagant lifestyles. It IS tricky to find a balance. We talk about this with our kids all the time. What do we NEED to be happy?
I think most children do need to have a little push, in the right direction…not in a mean way. Some adults need more than a push…they need a kick in the pants….they complain all the time but never do anything about it. Pride in accomplishing your goals is admirable too.
I am noticing more often that many parents do not provide clear expectations.
Here are some examples:
You will eat what Mommy or Daddy fixes and not your own private meal.
You will brush your teeth each day before and after school.
You will open your book bag and give me any notes from your teacher, as soon as you get home.
You will have your homework done by _____ ( set time for elementary schoolers).
You will have a B average in order to get your driver's license and drive a car.
You will have a curfew.
You will have a part time job during the summer, in HS and not finance your life on my credit card nor hang out and relax the entire summer.
You will keep your HOPE scholarship and if you do not, you will move back home and go to the local college.
You will pay room and board, if you move back home after college to get on your feet…you will also
help out with chores we, as adults, have to do.
Often, when chaos occurs…parents act like they have no clue as to how this happened. HUH?
Yes, there is always the possibility of unpredictable chaos but a lot of chaos could be eliminated with a little planning….but planning takes work and is not always fun.
Perhaps the Chinese Mothers are better planners and more diligent in executing the plan?
January 10th, 2011
9:21 am
IMHO it is a bad idea to generalize in any situation. I don't think the education in Georgia is in a "sorry state" at all. I'm sure in some places it is worse than others, but I teach in Fayette Co. and we consistently make high scores on CRCT, SAT, ect. and we aren't the only county doing that honestly. I guess it all depends on expectations from school boards, parents and people with a vested interest. Sorry to be on my soapbox-but that always hits a nerve with me. True, some children should not be in a regular classroom. I think we have gone a little too far with inclusion, but some children with IEPs actually do quite well in a regular classroom. Most of them try very hard to emulate their high achieving classmates. It is also good for the high achievers, the ones for which everything comes easy, to see that not everyone is like them. What a great lesson in humility and acceptance. On topic: I agree that balance is the key. The lady that wrote that book sounds like an extremist and I feel so sorry for the children who grow up in a home like that, just as I feel sorry for the children who grow up in a home with little or no parental support. It looks like both are a recipe for disaster, but I guess that's a generalization as well. Some children defy the odds no matter what!
January 10th, 2011
9:28 am
The competitive nature of our culture demands parental development of their child's self-esteem, team-work and social interaction with peers as well as adults.
While I favor more drilling and rote learning in the core curriculum of reading, writing, mathematics and science, extracurricular activities of all types are also needed for rounding and preparation for adult life in the US. Today in this country learning other languages is a must. Most Chinese students are raised to excel academically and in the performance arts. Orientals excel at individual excellence and self-discipline.
We also have a socially stratified society that guarantees in each generation a well-prepared group of young adults who were fortunate enough to be born to parents who thrive in the upper middle class. Their childhoods more closely follow the oriental norm with the unique American balance of activities that develop social skills. These children grow up to become the leadership class. This same class stratification provides in each generation different levels of motivation and achievement among youth entering adulthood. This provides us with mid- and lower-level workers–the followers. The tragedy in our culture as that most available employment now requires better core curriculum skills.
My daughter-in-law, with my son's involvement and support, parents in a manner that seems appropriately balanced: No sleepovers, sports or other extracurricular activities unless grades are B or better, TV or games only after homework is done and then for a limited amount of time (all homework assignments posted on the internet, so she can check them. (All special projects have to be chosen and 90% completed by the child; parents responsible for providing materials, time, work area, how-to demonstrations, and moral support.)
Last but not least, she and my son sacrifice to pay for private schooling that provides more practice and drilling with a balanced emphasis on creativity and extracurricular activities.
Can the public schools achieve the same balance? Only if parents support the schools by making sure kids get the same balance at home.
January 10th, 2011
9:30 am
The author of this article has clearly never met my wife's parents (East Indian) or mine (Jewish/"Western"). As a child, my wife was berated for not getting A's, not allowed to date until college, forced to play the violin, etc. etc. everything that this wonderful "Chinese mother" is supposed to do.
My poor wife, who happens to be brilliant, left home an emotional mess and has been in therapy for the last 15 years with no end in sight. She is very insecure, unable to finish her PhD or hold a job that realizes her intellectual potential and her parenting philosophy is to do the opposite of whatever her immigrant parents did to raise her.
I was raised by parents who may not fit the (ugly) stereotype of "Western" parents but they were much more reasonable. I had a normal childhood, watched TV and played video games in moderation, and got them taken away when I messed up. I was given boundaries, but allowed to make choices within those boundaries and accept the consequences more and more as I got older. I was given a fair amount of independence and lots and lots of praise and encouragement. My parents never blamed me for the grades themselves, just for the effort and conduct scores. (As it happens, I mostly got good grades anyway, but they did the same for my siblings who did not always do so well academically). I was allowed to pursue a musical instrument of my choice, or no instrument. I was given a shiny new one if I practiced and stuck to it, but not forced to sign up for orchestra, marching band, jazz band, concert band. That was my choice. I gave up on sports that I sucked at and continued with sports I was good at. And I was pretty happy. As an adult I'm doing just fine, thank you very much.
Thank God I did not have an "ideal Chinese mother." I just had two parents who loved me, supported me, set boundaries for me, taught me the importance of education, and were strict, but did not impose martial law in our house.
We should be able to discuss good parenting values without ascribing them to ethnic groups, regardless of whether positive or negative parenting traits are more prevalent in certain ethnic groups or immigrant status groups. The "Superior Chinese Mother" trope is meant to sell papers and books. It's not serious social science or even productive or useful popular discussion.
January 10th, 2011
9:41 am
my oldest daughter just could not learn to read. after kindegarten she was put into a 'readiness' class, for those kids who didnt have the skills required to enter 1st grade. i am an avid reader and it was very frustrating to me that i just couldnt teach her to read. i tried everything i could find on the subject. my older son seemed to be born knowing to read, so that made it doubly frustrating to me. all of a sudden, it seemed like over night-daughter could read like a champ. obviously she just had to reach that point in her mind maturity and then she was fine. i understand pushing your child to a certain point, and i think its great that this kid finally 'giot it' on the piano piece. but my god. what tactics. i want my kids to have good self esteem but i never have told them what they did was great when it wasnt. there is a balance. as i was reading i wondered at the stats on older chinese kids and mental illness of some kind. interesting to see posts regarding the suicide rate of chinese kids. i think this is sad. i do agree that we make things too easy for our kids and i agree that there is more emphasis on play than on studies. that is statistically proven when we compare our kids to other countries. but i think this woman hits the abuse line pretty hard.
January 10th, 2011
10:00 am
"We need to do SOMETHING about the sorry state of education here in GA."
The problem with the schools in GA is that we are catering to everyone but the US citizens. We have enticed everyone to come to our schools and yet we have tossed the largest segment aside. Asian children are setting the standards with their rigid upbringing, and then we tell the American kids they are stupid and lazy and educators ignore them. We spend time trying to teach the illegal immigrants Spanish and cater to their every whim even if their parents don't pay taxes.
It's a disgrace and an injustice what we have done to our taxpaying American parents and their children. You have the be the brightest or illegal to get attention in Georgia!
January 10th, 2011
10:11 am
I was raised in the US by Chinese parents and although the article is spot-on regarding their priorities (straight A's, hours of piano practice, etc), it makes it seem like the Chinese parents don't let their kids be who they want. That is so untrue!
My parents made it clear that I could do whatever I liked, so long as I got good grades, did my chores, and my piano teacher said I wasn't slacking off. Along with hard work and diligence, Asian kids also get good at time management! Even with studying and practice, I had plenty of time for "useless" activities like watching TV, reading fantasy books, hanging out with friends, etc.
I think it's a perfectly fine way to raise a child. It's important for parents to set high standards for their children. Kids are capable of far more than we expect.
January 10th, 2011
10:31 am
… teach the illegal immigrants English
January 10th, 2011
10:56 am
True Middle….my opinion is that the children should already have to speak English before being allowed in the school system. I also believe only American citizens should be taught. Get rid of the illegals and the anchor babies and focus on American children. My views may not be popular, but if we got rid of that, that would free up a ton of money that is being wasted. Free & reduced lunches? Show me pay stubs. You get public assistance? Show me a clean drug test. Receive government benefits and keep popping out kids? Get sterilized or an IUD or long term birth control.
Newblogger- I work for the school system in my county; it's a hot mess. Agreed it is mostly the result of the idiot school board and superintendent. Hopefully that will change soon. If you go back to separating by ability level, the teachers can teach more effectively. The above average kids can excel, the mid-level kids can be taught the concepts, and the special ed. children can get more attention as they need it, instead of trying to teach to the lowest level. That also solves some behavioral issues, as the kids can be challenged at their level and are not bored as the poor teacher tries to teach little Billy to grasp the concept of the subject being taught.
January 10th, 2011
11:02 am
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January 10th, 2011
11:43 am
@justmy2cents….I am with you :
Free & reduced lunches? Show me pay stubs. You get public assistance? Show me a clean drug test. Receive government benefits and keep popping out kids? Get sterilized or an IUD or long term birth control.
The free and reduced lunches put me on my soapbox. Those who are INSIDE the schools see the abuse. Just like my son sees the abuse at the pharmacy on prescriptions.
What is up with the GA proposed tax on food purchases in the works….4%? I am actually fine with it as it is akin to the fair tax but, once again, those who do not pay for food I assume will not pay the tax either? Guess they can get eaten up with the cigarette tax? I know, that was an assumption.
January 10th, 2011
12:14 pm
Just to be clear, Mrs. Chua is not practicing Asian parenting from Asia. She is an American-born Chinese who seems to have distorted everything her parents have tried to teach her through the prism of Western culture.
In Asia, there is an expectation for children to respect their parents. It's reinforced by popular television, movies, music and literature. I can't tell you how many times I've watched a film where the most heartwarming moment comes when a child proclaims he will do everything to better himself and please his parents.
In Western cultures, the overriding concept seems to be "you give respect only when you get respect." In this kind of culture, popular media often depicts mischievous children one-upping their clueless parents. Trying to practice "Asian" parenting here either leads to depressed and rebellious children or overly meek and social awkward children.
Asian parenting leads to rebelliousness in Western cultures because there is no Asian cultural reinforcement. When an Asian parent yells at a child, the child will never think to constantly better himself and work harder, because a Western child will most likely think "What right does my parent have to yell at me?" You get respect only if you give respect.
It also tends to lead to meek children because if a child does try to stick to what he thinks is an Asian ideal, he becomes overly deferential to teachers and parents. It becomes a social barrier in a society where kids may sometimes treat adults as equals.
January 10th, 2011
12:17 pm
The primary essence of this article — i.e., we put excessive, and detrimental, emphasis on our kids' "self-esteem" — has been advocated for the last 25 years now. But thanks to the slothful Teachers here — who disguise their non-teaching by floating feel-good pedagogy, instead of content-full real academia — is why these proven traditional techniques will NEVER be mainstreamed in America's schools. Of course, our media will also not effectively advocate "Asian" academia because time and time again our brutal Unions have proved their potency in advocating boycotts. Moreover, the media (which ensures its own kids are educated in private schools that adhere to Asian & traditional pedagogy) recognizes that we indeed need a Dumbed-Down society in order to sell anything from $200 sneakers to inner-city impoverished kids, to a trillion-dollar bogus war to suburban teens. Advertisement revenues and access to govt. sources is what keeps this dumbing-down going…
Note: Today most Asian kids are educated in our feel-good public schools; hence the critical comments of many Asian students, who are parroting their lazy teachers' hollow din.
January 10th, 2011
12:33 pm
Yes, this woman is way over the top.
Yes, she is way over the top even for Chinese mothers.
But look around my fellow countrymen.
Who are our country's over-achievers in today's schools? Asian-Americans. Not just Chinese, but Koreans and Indians.
Who are our country's doctors and lawyers and scientists? Asian-Americans.
Yes, not all are Asians and some of the school over-achievers and doctors and lawyers and scientists are white (European-American).
But the Asian-Americans are way way way over represented.
Now, this woman is a child abuser, no doubt about it.
And while she may say that she's a typical Chinese mother, I know she an't.
But excluding the fact that this Asian-American mother is a crazy abusive b*^&h, let's look at the big picture — Asian-Americans got something in their culture that use European-Americans don't.
Now I can't generlize for all European-Americans, just as this woman can't be seen as all Asian-Americans, but on average, who are the over-achievers?
Not just Chinese, but Koreans and Indians too.
People say Asian Americans are the "model minority" but that is not giving them enough credit because they are a "model for everybody."
And I'm your average white European-American guy.
I'm not putting down my fellow European-Americans, or any other Americans that aren't Asian.
What I'm saying is that on average there is something to be learned and copied from the Asian Americans.
And not just Chinese, but Koreans and Indians too.
They come to the US with nothing and go so very far. Nobody better represents the "American Dream" then Asian Americans.
And I'm saying this as a European-American (ie. white American).
January 10th, 2011
12:47 pm
I would like to also add that Jewish-Americans are known to be just like Asian-Americans — very successful and there is a lot of family support and pressure to be successful.
And if you look around, Jewish-Americans are way way way over represented as over-achievers in school and as doctors and lawyers and scientists.
Just like Asian-Americans.
So there is something that Jewish-Americans and Asian-Americans have in their culture.
And I'm saying this as a Christian-American and as a European-American (white).
What is it about Jews and Asians that make them so successful?
They are minorities in our mostly Christian and European (white people) country, yet they, on average, excell way above your average Christian-European-American.
We can learn something from Jewish-Americans and Asian-Americans.
January 10th, 2011
12:48 pm
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January 10th, 2011
12:54 pm
While I agree with most of the posters that these examples are over the top, I'm surprised that no one has mentioned what I immediately thought – Western parents don't expect good grades? Growing up I had definite expectations on my academics. Perhaps my parents didn't go nuts about Bs, but they were definitely insistent on my being successful, including getting consitently good grades. Going to college was never a question. I have the exact same expectations for DD – maybe even more so since college degrees are almost a dime a dozen now.
Whether we like her tactics or not, I think there is a seed of good here for all parents, and that is to ask yourself whether you're willing to put in the effort it takes to help your child be as successful as s/he can be. If that means making up tests to build retention skills or drilling spelling words or letting a child work it out on his/her own – it's a choice we all have to make.
January 10th, 2011
2:07 pm
Indeed, Jewish parents also practise the Asian startegies that result in their kids' over-representation in Ivy League schools, and Nobel Prize winning. YET, it is disturbing that MOST advocates of the new-wave failing practices that wreck our public schools are advocated by Jewish Professors and Jewish-led teacher unions (Weingarten, Shanker, et al). Like the fools who lecture on Israel (but are resented by most Israelis "over there"), these charlatans are destroying society.
January 10th, 2011
6:31 pm
@justmy2cents: I totally agree. In my class of 25, I have 8 gifted, 2 special ed. and 8 EIP (early intervention-just a little behind). I am encouraged (strongly) to teach "up" and not dumb it down for anyone. My special ed. and EIP children get some extra help so I don't teach down to them. No one at my school does. They are encouraged to rise to the occasion. We set the bar high and expect them to do their best to meet it. I hope your school system rises up out of their "hot mess" for all involved. I feel very fortunate to teach where I do and I know not all school systems are as diligent. Maybe it's the school board, the superintendent, the parents, I don't know. I have taught in a school system (many years ago) that it would seem time had forgotten. No one really cared and anything you did was o.k. Sad! Wish they could all be on board!
January 10th, 2011
6:35 pm
I am a Chinese mom and i fully understand Amy Chua even though i think she was too hard on her kids.Most Chinese Moms would not allow their daughters ( in high school) sleepover outside,they talk to her kids if they can't get As seriously.My daughter moved to America when she was 12 years old and she could not speak English then, but she studied hard and she got accepted by one of the best univeristies ( one of top 20s).
American students are given too much freedom from their parents and the society.In China ,there is no gun shooting in campus, but in here this is like a daily event. The kids need to be led/educated, the parents should get more involved .
January 10th, 2011
7:19 pm
I think this article was meant to be satire. Surely no one is taking any of it seriously. Wait, let me write an article about how all American soccer moms are required to wear the same color scrunchy.
The most motivated student I've ever had in my years of teaching was a Chinese female. The most unmotivated was a Chinese male. Go figure, you can't judge a race based on one or two people.
January 10th, 2011
11:15 pm
January 11th, 2011
11:53 am
Which half of your husband is Asian?
January 11th, 2011
1:15 pm
[...] Tiger MotherAnnArbor.comAmy Chua on Chinese Mothers: Parenting Genius or Dictatorship?Babble (blog)Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)all 101 news [...]
January 12th, 2011
3:36 am
I would just like to point out that there are other Asians in the world besides Korean and Indian.
January 12th, 2011
11:36 am
Chinese moms are as diverse as Western moms… so are their parenting styles. Can we just name the style Ms. Chua described as Ms. Chua's style?
January 12th, 2011
5:49 pm
The article is extremely opinioned! I am a Chinese mom myself and know many Chinese families in various communities/cities across US, none of us treat our kids like a dictator as described in the article! Most of us try to blend the Chinese and US culture together to complement each other. Amy's examples are extremes even for Chinese in China. It is possible that there are cases like her, but definitely not representing Chinese moms.
This article is very misleading to the world and I am very sad about this consequence! Do NOT believe in it!! Talk to a Chinese mom/dad and find out yourself!
I am also very disappointed at WSJ publishing this article, very poor due diligence!
January 12th, 2011
7:13 pm
[...] is that a heartfelt analysis of the American institution of motherhood proves that Chua's outrageous claims fall flat in every regard. What the Ivy Tower legal author fails to understand is that faith, [...]
January 13th, 2011
3:17 pm
This chaps my backside. There is NO perfect parent in this world. We all make mistakes.
I think by denying your child of basic childhood memories, sleepovers, school activities, etc., that makes a very boring adult. One who is NOT adventurous, willing to try new things, etc….
Kids should be allowed to be kids. They are only kids for such a short time, and we insist they grow up as fast as possible.
My daughter is going to be 20 next month, and what I wouldn't give for just one more day of her innocent childhood…..
January 13th, 2011
3:19 pm
Remember – we aren't raising children, we are raising adults!!!!
January 14th, 2011
8:04 am
There are 1+ billion Chinese in the world. If only 0.1% fit the stereotype, that would be 1 million piano-maestro, straight-A, MD-PhDs research scientists.
I always felt bad for the Asian-American kids who were average and did not fit the stereotypes. They are the ones who lose out because teachers don't pay them attention assuming they are smart, and the other kids hate them for it.
January 14th, 2011
12:37 pm
As an Asian-American growing up in America and now a mother of three, I am distressed by this stereotype. Setting that aside, I think the main goal of this woman is sell A LOT of books. Does anyone not see the parallel between the marketing of this book to "French Women Don't Get Fat"? Both books set up the premise that certain women are superior at certain things and generate much controversy and outrage. In both cases, the two issues that are thorns in women's sides are body image and parenting.


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Kahala Condo Rental Photos and Description
Condo, Studio + Convertible bed(s), 1 Bath, (Sleeps 2-4)
Enjoy your vacation in Hawaii in this beautiful and spacious studio with gorgeous turquoise ocean view. Indulge in luxurious amenities like a romantic king size canopy bed, a huge 47' LCD TV, a well equipped kitchenette with granite counter tops, a rock vessel sink in the bathroom, iPod dock, and much more...
Entirely renovated in 2009, this unique Hawaiian unit has been tastefully decorated with a tropical and modern flair, and with your comfort in mind. The studio comfortably accommodates 2 to 4 people in a king size bed and the sofa that converts to two twin size beds.
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Contact us as we have two other gorgeous studios in the same building.
Go to our website for more details and direct on line reservation.
Keywords: Condominium
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Guestbook comments from the owner
Thank you very much for a beautiful stay!
It was our first time to Hawaii, and our stay here made it even more enjoyable!


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For immediate release: August 24, 2012
Contact: Office of Public Affairs, (518) 436-2983
Ramp Closures for I-90 On- and Off-Ramp at NY Route 33
Work Scheduled Monday and Tuesday
BUFFALO -- The eastbound I-90 on- and off-ramps at NY Route 33 (Exit 51) will be closed for pavement rehabilitation starting at 9 p.m. Monday, August 27, and Tuesday, August 28, each night, the New York State Thruway Authority announced.
Ramp Closure for Week of August 27
Monday, August 27 – 9 p.m. to 6 a.m. Tuesday, August 28
- Eastbound off-ramp (Exit 51W) NY Route 33 (Buffalo)
- Eastbound on-ramp from eastbound NY Route 33
Tuesday, August 28 – 9 p.m. to 6 a.m. - Wednesday, August 29
- Eastbound off-ramp (Exit 51W) NY Route 33 (Buffalo)
- Eastbound on-ramp from eastbound NY Route 33
All work is weather dependent and subject to change.
Electronic message signs and Highway Advisory Radio (1610 AM) will be activated to notify motorists of the ramp closures and any resulting delays.
The Thruway Authority appreciates motorists' patience during this time.


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Audi has unveiled a new commercial for the Audi Q5 Quattro. The ad features a bunch of guys riding their mountain bikes in an effort to teach all of us a thing or two about the capability of the Audi SUV. Apparently, the Q5 can run through the woods and trail through all of the rough terrain they have to offer, just like the killer mountain bikes. Want some visual confirmation? Check out the video and see for yourself
The Audi Q5 is rolling off the production line in three engine variants – one gasoline engine and two TDI units. All of the engines are direct-injection models with a turbocharger – characterized by outstanding performance, hefty propulsive power and cultivated running while at the same time offering impressive fuel efficiency. The most powerful engine in the line-up is the 3.0 TDI engine that delivers 240 HP and 500 NM of torque. This version can sprint from 0 to 60 mph in 6.5 seconds, and can hit a top speed of 225 km/h (139.81 mph).


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Photos by Tom Casino/SHOWTIME -- Vic Darchinyan talked a big game in the days leading up to his world championship showdown with Dimitri Kirilov on Saturday, but can he back up those challenging and threatening words after his last two outings? Dimitri The Baby Kirilov (29-3-1, 9 KOs) will defend his International Boxing Federation (IBF) junior bantamweight against title against former IBF flyweight champion and knockout artist Vic Raging Bull Darchinyan (29-1-1, 23 KOs) live this Saturday on SHOWTIME CHAMPIONSHIP BOXING at 9 p.m. ET/PT (delayed on the west coast.).
In the co-feature, U.S. Olympian and undefeated prospect Andre The Matrix Dirrell (15-0, 10 KOs) will put his flawless record on the line against fellow unbeaten Mike The Persecutor Paschall (17-0-1, 4 KOs) in a 10-round super middleweight brawl.
The telecast will originate from the Emerald Queen Casino in Tacoma, Wash., and is promoted by Gotham Boxing, Inc.
Heres what the fighters had to say just two days before they battle in the ring:
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Hi- I'm looking for hiking partner(s). I think going to Jotunheimen National Park, and walk there 7-8 days. Begin any time from mid August, I have flexible schedule.Let me know if you are interested !Alex
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Dell Small Biz is offering some limited time savings on this Logitech Z623 2.1 THX Certified Speaker System!
If you're looking for bold sound in a small package for your computer then you've come to the right place. Logitech has you covered for a true sound experience without the bulk and length setup times of traditional systems. This Z623 system is a 2.1-Channel system with good enough sound to act like a 5.1-Channel system and powered by up to 200 watts at a time. It will spark all of your favorite content to life while providing a deep bass experience thanks to the powerful subwoofer it comes with. It's also designed for easy listening anywhere in the room with a 360 degree sound stage from the satellites and that makes their placement and setup even easier!
This awesome speaker system has never sold for so low. $50 in instant savings and free S&H make them just $99.99


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On Thu, 24 Jan 2008, Jeff Schiller wrote: > > http://www.w3.org/TR/html5/#the-img has an issue highlighted: "Should > we restrict the URI to pointing to an image? What's an image? Is PDF an > image? (Safari supports PDFs in <img> elements.) How about SVG? (Opera > supports those). WMFs? XPMs? HTML?" > > My belief is that we should not restrict the URI or specify the format. So should UAs support text/plain and text/html resources in <img> elements? -- Ian Hickson U+1047E )\._.,--....,'``. fL http://ln.hixie.ch/ U+263A /, _.. \ _\ ;`._ ,. Things that are impossible just take longer. `._.-(,_..'--(,_..'`-.;.'Received on Wednesday, 30 July 2008 02:14:40 GMT
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.2.0+W3C-0.50 : Wednesday, 9 May 2012 00:16:19 GMT


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Sign up for Yardbarker's daily Top 10 newsletter, the Morning Bark! Customize to get news on your favorite sports and teams.
Found November 28, 2012 on Grits Blitz:
PLAYERS: Michael Turner, Dirk Koetter
TEAMS: Atlanta Falcons
TEAMS: Atlanta Falcons
We've called for more Jacquizz for a while and last week our calls were answered. As the Falcons get deeper into the season, the brass is realizing more and more that Michael Turner is not a great fit for the offense Dirk Koetter is running and that he's getting up there in "football" years and Michael Cunningham covered it today in DOL's blog. If we look back at the last three games, Jacquizz has been gaining playing time every game as he went from playing 41% of the snaps against the Saints to 47% against the Cards to 51% against the Bucs. Turner on the other hand went from 45% against the Saints and Cards down to 38% against the Bucs. Snelling has seen a little more playing time as he went from 15% against the Saints to 25% against the Cards back down to 20% against the Bucs. It's obvious that Jacquizz gives the Falcons something that the other two RBs on the roster don't have and that's the wow factor. The ability to stop on a dime and make a guy miss in the open field. He's also more versatile and the Falcons are able to make better use of him in the passing game. Let's hope Dirk Koetter finds the right ways to use all our running backs and that Jacquizz is in the game more when it matters. All you have to do is watch the 4th quarter of the Tampa Bay game to see how important and impactful he can be in our offense.
Original Story: http://www.gritsblitz.com/2012-articl...
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Airport worker to be punished for egging
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Atlanta Falcons: Week 13 NFL Power Rankings (#6)
New Orleans Saints at Atlanta Falcons point spread, line and preview
Falcons pick off Brees 5 times, beat Saints 23-13
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Agatha was a short-lived tropical storm
that did not affect land.
A nearly stationary trough of low pressure
became established from the eastern Pacific east-northeastward
across Central America and portions of the Caribbean Sea during mid
May. This pattern resulted in a large area of moist southwest
monsoon-type flow over the region. A poorly-defined westward-moving
tropical wave became convectively active over the eastern Caribbean
Sea on 13 May, and crossed Central America on the 17th
accompanied by cloudiness and thunderstorms. Once the wave reached
the eastern Pacific and interacted with the trough, the convection
associated with the wave gradually became organized and on 20 May,
the system began to show signs of cyclonic rotation. As the wave
continued westward, the thunderstorm activity became concentrated
to the southwest of a developing low-level circulation center. It
is estimated that Tropical Depression One-E formed at 0000 UTC 22
May about 500 n mi south-southeast of Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. The
depression moved slowly toward the northwest and under very light
shear, the cyclone intensified and became Tropical Storm Agatha by
1200 UTC on that day. It is estimated that the cyclone reached its
peak intensity of 50 knots at 0000 UTC 23 May. Thereafter, cooler
sea surface temperatures and stable air caused the cyclone to
weaken gradually, and it degenerated to a remnant low by 1200 UTC
24 May. The low drifted aimlessly and dissipated by 0000 UTC 26
May. The "best track" chart of the tropical cyclone's path is given
in Figure 1, with the wind and pressure histories shown in
Figure 2 and Figure 3,
respectively. The best track positions and intensities are
listed in Table 1.
Observations in Agatha (Figure 2 and Figure 3)
include satellite-based Dvorak
technique intensity estimates from the Tropical Analysis and Forecast Branch
(TAFB), the Satellite Analysis Branch (SAB) and the U. S. Air Force Weather
Agency (AFWA). Microwave satellite imagery from NOAA polar-orbiting
satellites, the NASA Tropical Rainfall Measuring Mission (TRMM), the NASA
QuikSCAT, and Defense Meteorological Satellite Program (DMSP) satellites
were also useful in tracking Agatha. It is interesting that SSM/I and TRMM
images of Agatha from around 1400 UTC 22 May through 0230 UTC 23 May
revealed a ring of precipitation that resembled an eyewall as indicated in
link figure="4"/>.
The presence of the convective ring suggests that Agatha's peak
intensity was probably higher than indicated by the Dvorak estimates,
although no technique exists to estimate tropical cyclone intensity from
such microwaves features. The peak intensity of Agatha is estimated to be 50
kt but this estimate is particularly uncertain.
There were no reports of damage or
casualties associated with Agatha.
Agatha was a short-lived tropical cyclone
and there were only a few forecasts to verify. The average official
track errors (with the number of cases in parentheses) for Agatha
were 26 (8), 46 (6), 67 (4), and 111 (2), n mi for the 12, 24, 36,
and 48 h forecasts, respectively. These errors are lower than the
average official track errors for the 10-yr period 1994-2003 of 38,
70, 100, and 127 n mi, respectively).
Average official intensity errors were 8,
13, 11, and 5 kt for the 12, 24, 36, and 48 h forecasts,
respectively. These average official intensity errors over the
10-yr period 1994-2003 of 6, 11 , 15, and 17 kt, respectively.
Figure 1:
Best track positions for
Tropical Storm Agatha, 22-24 May 2004.
Figure 1:
Selected wind observations and
best track maximum sustained surface wind speed curve for Tropical
Storm Agatha, 22-24 May 2004.
Figure 3:
Selected pressure observations
and best track minimum central pressure curve for Tropical Storm
Agatha, 22-24 May 2004.
Figure 4:
Microwave data for Agatha at 0235
UTC showing a ring of convection resembling an eyewall.


text:
Alfresco's original all-weather refrigerator unit is still one of the most innovative designs on the market. True restaurant-inspired design keeps cold items organized and convenient. The unique marinating drawers are great for holding meat before it goes on the grill or are perfect for keeping salads and toppings fresh.
All-welded commercial stainless steel construction
4 cu. ft. door section with adjustable wire shelves
Dual marinating drawers with removable s/s food pans
Compact, commercial compressor system
Shipping Weight: 350 lbs
Shipping Method: Motor Freight


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Virginia Treatment Center for Children and the Commonwealth Institute for Child and Family Studies; department of Psychiatry of the Medical College of Virginia in Richmond
Virginia Commonwealth University School of Social Work
Virginia Treatment Center for Children
The Medical College of Virginia
1991 by The American Psychiatric Association, Inc.
Survey data were collected from 45 states on the extent to which transfer of custody was required for families to obtain intensive services for children with serious emotional disturbances. In 28 of the states (62 percent), at least one agency serving children reported using transfer of custody as a requisite for obtaining services. Corrections and social service agencies were most likely to require transfer of custody, followed by youth services and mental health agencies. Most agencies that required transfer of custody lacked statutes or regulations governing two of the three types of transfers used. States that required transfer of custody tended to be less populated and to have a lower per capita income than states that did not. The major factor contributing to use of transfer of custody, the authors conclude, is the absence of an adequate system of services designed specifically for children with serious emotional disturbances.
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Purchase Online access to this article for 24 hours
PsychiatryOnline subscription options offer access to the
DSM-5 library, books,
journals, CME, and patient resources. This all-in-one virtual library provides psychiatrists
and mental health professionals with key resources for diagnosis, treatment, research,
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Zillow CEO: "63 Homes Are Viewed on Mobile Every Second" – Real Estate for Sale in Santa Monica
This morning, Zillow CEO Spencer Rascoff joined Carl Quintanilla and David Faber on CNBC's "Squawk on the Street" to discuss Zillow's record second quarter results and weigh in on the state of housing.
Rascoff explained how the company's acquisition of RentJuice has influenced Zillow's expanding rental business as well as how Zillow Mobile Apps are driving Zillow's growth. Watch the video here or click on the image below.
See more:
Zillow Blog – Real Estate Market Stats, Celebrity Real Estate, and Zillow News


text:
Hear the Colts and Chiefs in Round One of Playoffs
For the second year in a row, Andrew Luck and Chuck Pagano have led the Indianapolis Colts to the post season, and we are carrying all of the action.
For the second year in a row, Andrew Luck and Chuck Pagano have led the Indianapolis Colts to the post season, and we are carrying all of the action.
So, LOTS of things happened last weekend and this week in the NFL. Good thing I'm here to sort it all out and tell you what you missed this week in the world of football.
Sometimes this job really sucks – for example, when I am forced to stop reporting on the evils of our depraved society and write a few words about a tight-bodied Indianapolis Colts cheerleader.
The Indianapolis Colts are back on 103GBF again this season. QB Andrew Luck will attempt to get Indy into the playoffs for the 2nd year in a row in his 2nd full NFL season.
There's lots of fresh, new faces on the roster
Indianapolis Colts first-year head coach Chuck Pagano has been diagnosed with a treatable form of leukemia, according to sources.
The sources said Pagano waited until the Colts' bye week last week to be checked out after experiencing extreme fatigue and bruising, starting in training camp
I always get a kick out of seeing professional athletes doing funny stuff...when they're not too tough to be goofy for a little bit. And it's even better when it's an athlete that you know and like, and one that plays for YOUR team.
It's the final week of pre-season football and the Colts finish up at home against the Cincinnati Bengals tonight, one day before the league deadline to trim rosters down to 53 men.
Catch Colts pre season action as Indy goes for 2-0 against the Steelers Sunday night.
Join Bob Lamey for the countdown to kickoff starting at 6pm here on your home for Colts Football…103GBF!
Once again, 103GBF is proud to be the home for Indianapolis Colts football in Evansville.
After suffering through a dismal season last year, well you know the story... 2012-2013 brings a season of rebuilding
Quarterback Andrew Luck is within hours of reporting to training camp along with his Colts teammates. It has been an eventful spring, which started with the Combines and ends this week with some practice before reporting to Anderson University on Saturday
Even though we're not 100% sure who will be taking snaps this season, we do know it won't be any of the QB's on the Colts roster last year. If things work out right in the draft, Stanford's Andrew Luck will be leading the Colts this season.
When you count all the changes the Indianapolis Colts have made recently, perhaps the least noticeable will be the team's new gear.


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on new arrivals at both stores!
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The Secret Cellar
Ask about our special back room with
over 600 carefully cellared premium wines.
Over 1500 Beers
Bottled beers from all over the world. Many of them
specialty craft beers and unique microbrews.
Over 2500 Wines
We stock over 2500 wines, probably the
largest selection in the Ann Arbor area.
When is a beer that's ordinarily just really good, really GREAT? When the beer is 312 Urban Wheat Ale, and it's summer time, and we have it at a special price. Read More →
Just In: The Chocolate Manifesto, a sophisticated and insanely chocolatey stout from Canada's Flying Monkeys Craft Brewery Read More →
What's so ruthless about Ruthless Rye? It's ruthlessly delicious! And on special right now. Read More →
As the "Next Silicon Valley", Ann Arbor has a lot of the same things the Bay Area has to offer – like Anchor Beer – but at a better price! Read More →
We just got in our favorites from the Francis Coppola Diamond Collection. What could we possibly say about them that the producer hasn't already said? Read More →


text:
Each season, more and more bloggers flock to fashion weeks around the world to give their followers an inside look at what goes on at the shows and share their favorite discoveries of the seasons. We checked in with four California-based bloggers to find out which collections they love, how to best get photographed outside the venues and what their favorite crazy fashion week moments are this season.
SF Unzipped
Revealing San Francisco's secret love of fashion, beauty and shopping


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text:
The local flu outbreak so far is showing no signs of easing. In fact, 119 new cases have been reported just this week in Erie County. That brings the total number of confirmed cases to 406.
Char Berringer, R.N. of the Erie County Health Department said, "At this point, we don't have indications that we have peaked. We won't know until we have seen a decline. We have not seen a decline in the weekly numbers at this point."
So far, 43 victims have been admitted to local hospitals. And one death has been attributed to the flu.
Eight local long term care facilities report at least one confirmed case of the flu.


text:
The following five apps will help people in same-sex relationships to find love…or maybe just a hookup. Here are our five favorite gay and lesbian dating apps.
BOYFRIENDTWIN is a hilarious Tumblr that shares photos of gay couples who look like they could be related. Check out the best pictures of these guys here.
Actress Sara Gilbert reveals co-star Johnny Galecki kept her gay sexuality a secret for years. Gilbert talks about it in full detail on 'The Talk'. Watch here.
"I believe that exposing children to these health risks without clear evidence of benefits that outweigh these serious risks is not appropriate." — Governor Chris Christie
Macklemore rocked the stage on Good Morning America today, but when a lesbian couple got engaged onstage, quoting 'Same Love', is when things really got crazy.
Members of the LGBT community are boycotting the Ender's Game movie due to the well-established anti-gay marriage views of the book's author, Orson Scott Card.
Aaryn Gries was fired from "Big Brother" and "Zephyr Talent" model agency after using offensive language that was broadcasted on live television.
Alec Baldwin makes homophobic comments on Twitter directed at the UK Daily News reported who accused his wife of tweeting during James Gandolfini's funeral.
It seems as though gay porn and homophobia go hand in hand.
"Fixing" gay marriage? Don't go there, Nintendo…
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you are welcome
hey how are you?:)
weekend is coming, any plan for your weekend?
havent back yet? :)
I'm a model & talent agent in beijing,looking for dancers ,singers ,bands ,actors , models and so on .If you are interested,please send me your photos and contact to email@example.com .Thank you
nice page..
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