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Joe Hallenbeck's PEARL HARBOR: A Line Must Be Drawn!
Hey folks, Harry here... It's scary how accurate Hallenbeck is... but also he has some criticisms about the film that aren't accurate (but he'd have to see the movie to realize that) but his heart is in the right place. This movie isn't the film to rush out to see... I'd say wait 3 weeks and hit a matinee on Sunday. Here is Hallenbeck...
What is up, my Negroes?! Or, is it "are up?" What is it? Well, who gives a fuck!
It's that time of year again, my lil' bitches and like a rabid groundhog, the Mighty Joe Hallenbeck is going to rear his ugly head to cast a shadow over that eye sore known as the Summer Movie Going Season. For the last several years we have been so disappointed in what the 'Wood has had to offer. Sure, some gems like X-MEN and THE 6th SENSE have manage to survive the triteness of the "typical" summer flick, but films like that are few and far in between. Now, we come to the Summer of 2001. . .a time when one would hope the films would begin to turn around from last year's drivel and the previous year's stank. Memorial Day usually kicks off the Summer Movie going Season with the film that, traditionally, is the "EVENT MOVIE OF THE YEAR!" Let's look back at the past "Event" films that have kicked off the summer season:
Mission: Impossible – Uno y Dos.
Star Wars: The Jar Jar Menace
The Flintstones
The Lost World
Shall I continue? No, I didn't think so. I'll allow you a moment to wipe the blood away from your eyes after reading those titles.
So, now we come to Y2K1, with hopes that Mr. Bay and Mr. Bruckheimer will break this evil spell of crapfests. Have they succeeded? Will PEARL HARBOR be the one flick to wipe away that pustule, infected scar tissue known as the Memorial Day "EVENT" Film?
HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW?! I haven't seen the movie nor do I have ANY intentions of doing so! I am not about to waste nine bucks and three hours of my precious time watching an overblown piece of shit, flag-waving, "Bombing-of-Pearl-Harbor" movie by the guys who brought us Armageddon! Oh, and before you say, "But Mighty One, you LOVED Armageddon"…let me just say that I still do and always will. THAT is a mindless piece of fluff entertainment NOT meant to do ANYTHING ELSE but entertain. Granted, a lot of people didn't even find it very entertaining. . .however, a lot did.
The point here is that a subject matter like Pearl Harbor should not be subjected by the slick, glossy filmmaking styles of two charlatans like Bay and Bruckheimer. This subject matter has been attacked a BAJILLION times on film. . .some versions good (FROM HERE TO ETERNITY) some versions so-so (TORA! TORA! TORA!). What B & B (and I ain't referring to Beavis and Butthead. Although. . .) have created here is a hackneyed romance set against a tragic period in American History. They have "Disneyfied" the subject to no avail. The sad thing is, I haven't even seen this movie and I KNOW this is the case. Shit, all you have to do is watch the trailer or the 10,000 TV spots for the flick to see what a supped up, glossy piece of Mickey Mouse shit this is! Disney is cramming so much shit down the movie watching public's throats that it has become YOUR mission to fork over a year's salary and partake in a flick YOU KNOW will BLOW! I, for one, will not be bullied into a film that will suck. My tastes of late have changed dramatically. I know from the first 5 seconds of a trailer if this is a film I want to see. The trailer for Pearl didn't BUY me! Disney couldn't even fuckin sell me on the TRAILER! Who the fuck do they have working on the marketing, CHRIS PULA?!
First off, the only clue you give your audience as to what this film is about is 'Splosions! Lots and lots of BOOM-BOOM! Granted, the majority of the film going public is mentally retarded, but I believe, it's a filmmaker's task to deliver a product that will entertain as well as educate an audience. That is not your intentions at all. You have belittled the audience's intelligence by patronizing to the lowest, cousin pokin' mentality.
Knowing how utterly predictable and wretched this movie is I'm going to put my size 3 inch dick out on the chopping block and dare to review the "MUST SEE" film of the Summer!
So, sit back, grab yer pecker and enjoy a complete BS, but "so sad it is accurate" review of a film I will never see. . .
PLOT: Ben Affleck is a good man and a good American. He wants to fight in the war, but his girl won't let him. However, knowing that her beau is a noble man, she lets him go. In the meantime she falls for his best friend, played by Assface from H20. Ben dies…or so we think. The Japs bomb the shit out of Hawaii. Many people have boo-boos. The relationship between chicky baby and Assface is shaky at best 'cus she still loves Ben. Some dogfight ensues at the end and Ben miraculously saves the day. YAY! HUR-RAY! He's not dead after all. All is not lost. The US Armed forces will gather arms and kick some Rising Sun Ass. The end…or is it? Who knows what happens? Maybe we'll find out in Pearl Harbor II: D-DAY! In that, Ben will be flying the Enola Gay, but some how be transported into the future – to the Present Day. He'll fly west and arrive over Burbank. He'll spot that eyesore known as Disney Studios and drop the bomb. Eisner and his Daisy Chain of wannabe Movie moguls will all be destroyed, along with the master prints of The Santa Clause and all post Katzenberg animated films Disney has produced (of course, the PIXAR stuff will be stored safely up in Northern California).
THE DIRECTION: Subtlety is not one of Michael Bay's strong suits. You'd have a better chance finding a tasty spot on Rosie O'Donnell's inner thigh than you would finding a subtle, gentile moment in a Bay flick. That said, I have thoroughly enjoyed his films in the past. I think THE ROCK is one of the best, straightforward action films ever made. BAD BOYS is also a fun little romp. . .a wee bit too long, but an enjoyable movie never the less. And ARMAGEDDON, well . . .if you don't know how I feel about it, go read my old review. With Pearl Harbor Bay has managed to "HOLLYWOODIZE" a subject matter as tragic and important as this. Like Emmerich and Devlin did last year with THE PATRIOT, Bay trivializes our American History by putting in lame "heroic" moments and glossing up death. If Bay would have directed SCHINDLER'S LIST he would have made the "SHOWER SCENE" look slick – close ups of the gas being released, the women's tears flowing down their faces. The THX Sound System would have been working overtime with the ear piercing screams of the dying Jews. The last soul would have reached up to the heavens and uttered the words, "Why, God? Why?" Oh, and not to mention Zimmer's over the top Operatic score reaching a Crescendo when that last woman's arm drops lifeless to the ground.
Look, Mr. Bay – I think what you have done with your previous films was entertaining. . .headache inducing, but entertaining nevertheless. However, you have NO RIGHT as a filmmaker to tackle such an important subject such as this. This is a major back step in your career. You were mocked and ridiculed before this film, but now you'll be laughed out of the 'Wood. Do yourself a favor and take some time off. Look for a script that is small in scope and intimate in characters. You are NOT James Cameron. You don't have the ability as a filmmaker to balance a sappy romance with a big budget action, special f/x spectacle. Be like my Hallen-cock and think small.
THE WRITTING: Oh, so you mean there WAS a script? Didn't they just take the romance of Titanic, horrendous cliched lines written by Audie Murphy Jr, and add 'splosions to make this WONDERFUL film? I haven't heard dialogue this bad since I saw the immortal CONGO! It's the kind of lines that sound like nails on the chalkboard when delivered. It makes you weep for the future of screenwriting.
BEN: Oh, he's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Dreamy! I can buy him in Smith flicks and even as the good guy in REINDEER GAMES, but here as a Patriotic soldier? He looks more out of place than Keanu Reeves does at a Mensa Meeting! Ben, Hon, stop trying to act cool. You're not. You're not the "hero" type. If you were any kind of actor you would step down from the latest Jack Ryan movie and say to those schmucks at Paramount, "Uh, guys. . .I'm just not right for this Jack Ryan role. Give Alec a shit load of money and have him reprise the role he was born to play." Be a man, damn it!
ASSFACE: Assface is an actor whom I loathe, despise and cannot stand. He is a talent less little phop who must give great head in order to have achieved the roles he has won. He played the bad ass in the wretched FACULTY, Jamie Lee's son in H20, and now commands the lead in Ridley Scott's latest opus, BLACK HAWK DOWN. The one thing I can say about Assface's performance is that he FINALLY got his hair combed by someone in make-up. Other than that, please die. OD on something. Drop out of film acting and go back to your true calling of making Iced Mocha Fraps at Starbucks. One Keanu in this industry is about all that we can handle at a time, so please, Assface, stop making movies. 'Kay? Kiss-kiss!
CHICKY BABY: Some wanker who may be a good actress, but you sure as hell couldn't tell here. Of course, that's the scripts fault. It's not her fault. She just wanted the big paycheck and the chance to work with the "dreamy" Affleck.
CUBA: He's to fuckin cool to be in this flick. Shame on you, dude!
THE BALDWIN THAT CAN ACT: Stick to Mamet. 'Nuff said!
THE MUSIC: Uh, Mr. Zimmer, Ennio called. . .he would like his sheet music back.
THE 'SPLOSIONS: I haven't seen this many explosions fill the screen since that Annabel Chong Movie! 'Splosions are cool, but they don't make up for the lack of story or the wretched dialogue.
Disney should be ashamed of themselves. Of course, being the Whores that they are they think it is perfectly all right, if not "patriotic," to cram this film down the public's throats. Instead of the public making this film the "MUST SEE" movie of the summer, Disney and their marketing machine is TELLING you that IT IS! It was a beautiful time when a film would come out with little fanfare, relying on word of mouth to make it the "IT" film you just HAD to see. That's not the case any more. We are TOLD what to see. We are TOLD what to watch. And, if we don't, we can't be part of the "Water Cooler" club. I didn't watch one second of that Survivor show and I ain't gonna watch one frame of this film. My time would be better spent picking up trash and hoeing weeds off the side of the freeway. Oh, wait a second – I do that anyway. Never mind.
You KNOW this movie will suck. However, you will still go to it, fork over your nine bucks and waste 3 hours of your life. You'll come out of it claiming it was such an abysmal piece of shit that you'll want to take up arms and storm the gates of Disney.
I ask you this: If you know that is a pile of dog shit sitting on the ground would you still pick it up and eat it? NO! If you KNOW fire burns, would you still reach into the flame to test it to see if it burns? NO! You're not a fuckin idiot! You are, I hope, a rational, intelligent human being who is able to make up your own mind and not cater to the whim of a Corporate Whore like McMicro Disney (the ULTIMATE CORPORATION THAT WILL COME ABOUT AFTER THE MAJOR MERGER OF 2008!).
DO NOT SEE THIS FILM! DO NOT let films like this continue to be made! This is NOT "supporting the arts!" Go see MEMENTO! Go see SHREK! Go see THE DISH! Hell, go see THE MUMMY RETURNS if you HAVE to see mindless entertainment! Make a fuckin stand NOW! These whores care only about one thing – MONEY! Do not give them YOURS! Take that $9.00 and rent a few good movies. Rent any of these great classics I've watched recently:
Modern Times – Hell, ANY CHAPLIN flick!
King's Row
Splendor in the Grass
Auntie Mame
The Robe
The House of Usher (Corman/Price)
Rebecca – or ANY Hitchcock FILM!
Cat People (The Lewton version!)
Lost Horizon – or ANY Capra flick!
Rent SOMETHING if you want to watch a movie! Do NOT see this film! AVOID IT! SEND A MESSAGE!
Goddamn it, make this film BOMB! Do NOT perpetuate shit like this! Do not let filmmaker's like Jerry and Michael put their own spin on historical feats like this! Do not let them get away with a crime like this! Stop letting F/X and 'splosions get in the way of telling a decent story! There is only ONE WAY these asswipes will get this message and that's by not adding any more mula to their fat wallets. This Memorial Day, pay your respects to the men and woman who fought to make this country great and also to those who have made this industry last for as long as it has. Pay your respects to filmmakers like Ford, Capra, Wyler or Curtiz. . .those daring filmmakers who fought the war in the 'Wood while our Boys were kicking some ass overseas!
Oh, and for those who think I'm being too harsh on Disney, you should read what I have to write about Warner Bros. That Bitch slapping will come next week with my review of SWORDFISH. . .a movie that has two things going for it – and they're BOTH attached to Halle Berry.
Send your nude photos of your sister to:
My Porn Drawer By Clicking Here,
Joe Hallenbeck
{Editor's Note: This Review Has Been Approved By Pussy}
Readers Talkbackcomments powered by Disqus
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May 24, 2001, 11:49 a.m. CST
A tale told by an idiot
by Wee Willie
full of sound and fury and signifying nothing (sic)
May 24, 2001, 11:54 a.m. CST
by jon-e-blaze
May 24, 2001, 12:02 p.m. CST
Priceless....and pretty much right on the money
by Shawn F.
I saw this film last night. Lame-fucking-o. I think even the hardcore Bay fans will pretty much hate this. And Jerry Fuckheimer, stop doing blow off of Don Simpson's rotting corpse before you choose a project. This review was spot on, and he was lucky enough NOT to have seen it.
May 24, 2001, 12:03 p.m. CST
Welcome back, Joe!
by Pope Buck 1
Hey, Joe? Where you goin' with that gun in your hand? Gonna rub out Bay and Bruckheimer as a public service to humanity! God, it's great to have you back. And I fully agree - why are people announcing so defensively that they ARE going to see it (so there!), when you know damn well they're all going to complain to high heaven about it afterwards?
May 24, 2001, 12:08 p.m. CST
As soon as someone says they like Armageddon they have lost any
by doctorcreep
I have yet to sit all the way through it, or The Rock.
May 24, 2001, 12:10 p.m. CST
Hooray for Hallenbeck!
by Johnny Storm
You rock my world.
May 24, 2001, 12:13 p.m. CST
I didn't read this article.
by pedant
The harder I tried to get my mind around the idea that X-MEN and THE SIXTH SENSE are supposed to be examples of "gems," the more nauseated I felt. It was at that point that I gained enough insight into Hallenbeck's tastes to realize that I stood to gain nothing by reading the rest of the review. Sorry.
May 24, 2001, 12:25 p.m. CST
Not even what this guy wrote is gonna stop the idiots who come t
by Gustavo Cerati
"Duuhhhh...they say it sucks...duuhhh....I
May 24, 2001, 12:30 p.m. CST
thank you
by Lee_R
I really needed a reason not to see this movie. They've been showing the long-ass, BORING trailer for two years now. The music makes me sick, and it would take a monkey wrench crushing my nuts to suppress my laughter if the notion that these filmmakers could make a watchable film ever crossed my mind.
May 24, 2001, 12:35 p.m. CST
by Uga
Absolutely perfect! You want Alec back as Jack Ryan, and you noticed Hartnett finally combed his damn hair! Genius, my brother! Damn, I've even forgiven you for liking "Armageddon!"
May 24, 2001, 12:36 p.m. CST
An article written by an idiot Big Deal.
by Roborob
Has the writter of the article lost a job in Disney? or Has is Mr B. his lost Love? I don't Care either way this rant is moronic. If you havn't seen a film Don't tell others how the acting and FX suck You have only seen the trailer. To Finish I just want to say the list of Films to Rent SUCK I mean chaplin Crap, Harold Loyd was better every time. This article sounds like some losers rantings when he is drunk. I am sure you could have done better.
May 24, 2001, 12:37 p.m. CST
Why is it always "Don't waste your money" or "I cried over the $
by Charles Grady
Are all my fellow film geeks THAT poor? I swaer, every internet review I ever see where the poster didn't like the review, he/she always puts it in terms of "money down the drain." Here again, Hallenback is warning you to "save your nine bucks and three hours of your life." Just my personal opinion, but as a TRUE movie lover, film is the issue, not money. I see 60 or 70 movies a year on the big screen, and I never, no matter how bad the film is, regret the MONEY I spent. I just see the money spent as a necessary fact of life, just as people alot money for gas or the phone bill or a roof over my head. I love the movies and value any moviegoing experience, whether it's GOODFELLAS or BATTLEFIELD EARTH. I know maybe a lot of you are younger or in college and don't have money falling off a tree in your backyard, but the "don't waste your money" argument should be lost on anyone who loves film. That sounds to me like the reaction of an average Joe who views movies as commerce, not art. Come on, AICN'ers always complain when studios put money over artistic integrity, including in some ways this very piece above. We loathe when studio execs see film only in terms of its box-office possibilites, when they judge films not on quality but on how much they pull in a weekend. Don't be guilty of the same thing. If you hate a movie, hate it for artistic reasons, not because you shelled out a particular monetary amount. Jeez, if you're that broke, catch a matinee! It still gets me when people say, "Wait for video." Look, if you catch a matinee it's like, what $4.50? $6, tops? Hell, Blockbuster charges like $4 bucks just to rent a pan-and-scan of the movie, so go see it in a damn theatre the way it was meant to be seen. Moviegoing doesn't HAVE to be a $50 experience, but even if it is, I would think a proud film geek could justify the price and forget about it, then concentrate on what's on the screen, not in his wallet.
May 24, 2001, 12:41 p.m. CST
Size 3 inch dick? I always knew you were compensating for someth
by Batutta
May 24, 2001, 1:16 p.m. CST
welcome back joe
by KAmnell
Don't always agree with you(will probably see PH this Sunday afternoon) or the language you use at times, but it's good to see ya back here. .
May 24, 2001, 1:22 p.m. CST
Charles Grady, I am in total agreement
by Terry_1978
whenever a new movie comes out, I read the reviews, and yes even those that get the crappiest ones known to the species...I still go and see. I want to experience films firsthand, and I take reviews into consideration, but I never come out of a movie whining about how I could have spent that 8 bucks(I live in Indiana, so we're not in the 9 bucks and beyond movie ticket prices yet) on something else. Most of the PH reviews have been negative, but most summer flicks get negative reviews, and ironically, we all flock to the theatres for the same reason...to be entertained, regardless of how accurate the portrayals are, or how good the script is.
May 24, 2001, 1:40 p.m. CST
Take this review off the site
by Ben Affleck
I take exception to this piece of junk review! Suffer in knowing I have an oscarrrrrr (Good Will Hunting script. Booyah!) and eat your words when I take the oscar again for "Sum of All Fears".
May 24, 2001, 1:51 p.m. CST
Bruckheimer/Bay are good when they aren't trying to make you cry
by ar42
Hence... The Rock: good. ("Winners go home and fuck the prom queen!") Armageddon: bad. ("I address you tonight not as the president of the United States, but as a citizen of humanity.") My guess for Pearl Harbor: bad. ("Don't die on me Jack! I love you! More than that other guy!")
May 24, 2001, 1:55 p.m. CST
$9.00 will buy you at least 3 mochas - choose wisely
by Fandude
May 24, 2001, 2 p.m. CST
Il ike movies too much to watch the crappy ones.
by Sgt. Bilko
Saw a clip of this last night on Letterman and just about had a Pokemon seizure. Alec Baldwin and THOSE WHO ARE *BRAVE* ENOUGH stride out of the hanger as two planes fly into the dawn. You could send an inner city child to college for what it took to film this scene. Joe is right. Bad movies suck. Don't see them. I want Disney to take a beating on this.
May 24, 2001, 2:05 p.m. CST
Such Bullosity in this review.
by AnamorphicRulez!
How lame. I think he's jealous of Ben Affleck because he get's to make out with all of these good looking girls in his movies. When you have so much contempt for an actor how can you look at a movie of his objectively? It's not gonna matter because when the DVD comes out for this it's going to Rock(Criterion Edition released recently). Oh yeah remember to demand anamorphic transfers for your DVDs and long live DVD!!!!
May 24, 2001, 2:06 p.m. CST
welcome back joe
by KAmnell
Don't always agree with you(will probably see PH this Sunday afternoon) or the language you use at times, but it's good to see ya back here. .
May 24, 2001, 2:15 p.m. CST
Where was the indignity when The Patriot came out?
by Milktoast
I say Patriot because that is the one that most comes to mind right now as making Hwood summer flick out of history. Slick, dumb and mawkish. Fuck it. Why take Pearl Harbor so seriously (the movie, I mean). Get off the controversy band wagon. It is what it is.
May 24, 2001, 2:16 p.m. CST
RE: Annoying people who bitch...(read for clarity)
by racurnutte
...well, that was an original post, fuckhead! Someone complaining about a blockbuster! I've never heard that before. If you hate these movies so much, why devote so many bytes to a non-review of it? Because it doesn't matter? It must matter to you, or you'd just be quiet about it. Here's the lowdown, Opinion Boy. I agree, in principle, tbat most Hollywood films are junk. But, guess what? So are most independent films. So are most books. So are most albums. That's the whole concept of populist art. When art hits the mainstream, it becomes homogenized. So does milk. Milk has become so popular, that it can't be drunk in its purest form. Who fucking cares? There's bad shit out there, period. I don't really care if it's directed by Michael Bay or Woody Allen (have you seen his last five films? Is Mighty Aphrodite really more socially significant than Bad Boys? hell no), shit is shit is shit, and I'm so sick of hearing self-important people rail on about how bad things have become. Become? Have you paid any attention to the mistakes of the past. Ever hear of the following films? Cleopatra (Liz), The Green Berets, Heaven's Gate, etc. etc. Bad, expensive, moronic movies are a distinguished Hollywood tradition. Something else stupid: "movies used to come from out of nowhere", wah wah. Ever heard of: The Sixth Sense, Forrest Gump, Titanic, Home Alone. These are films that no one paid much heed to, or thought were destined for failure. Does this make them better films? Maybe they are, but not because of the box office receipts. How about brilliant films that came out of nowhere: Silence of the Lambs, Pulp Fiction, Crouching Tiger, Hidden DRagon, Traffic, the list goes on. These are quality films that grossed a lot of money and met with critical fanfare. Should they be banned because they made a lot of money? Would you like Memento if it had grossed 50 million opening weekend? Doubtfully, you just hate populist entertainment. Here's one more thought: art breeds subjectivity, it's the entire point of art, whether it's commercial or underground. If you don't like it, fine, don't like it. Tell people you don't like it. Sing to the hills, "I hate Pearl Harbor!" But don't condescend the 50 million people who will see it, just because you long for the "glory" days of The Valley of the Dolls".
May 24, 2001, 2:19 p.m. CST
That was the most asinine thing I've ever read.
by Twig
But anyone who "reviews" a film w/o seeing it and has the stupidity to actually say so is clearly a couple apples short of an orchard.
May 24, 2001, 2:21 p.m. CST
fuckin' A
by fear of a ted
Preach it brother Joe! Tell it! Lift your hands up to the sky and sing the words that will set you FREEEEE! Nice writin', dude.
May 24, 2001, 2:33 p.m. CST
But I liked "ASSFACE" in Virgin Suicides!
by Southern Crane
Huh-huh. I thought Josh Hartnett did a good job in Virgin Suicides, as a total beef-knob. Maybe that's all he can do, 'cause I haven't seen him in anything else.
May 24, 2001, 2:38 p.m. CST
welcome back
by Azzamckazz
welcome back mr hallenbeck...you're the one and only thing that makes this site worthwhile
May 24, 2001, 2:54 p.m. CST
The movie has no respect for the event it was based on
by Insane Tiki
If it did, it would be a completely different film, closer to "Private Ryan" in it's realistic portrayal of the chaos of war. But, no, let's gloss over some of that "emotion" stuff. Let's just show things blowing up. A love story? Ben Affleck? Good lord, these people just have no respect. And, yes, I've only seen the trailers, but good lord, I wanted to wretch right there in the theater. If the entire movie is as over-the-top and melodramatic as the trailer, I'll be running out of the theater during reel one. Japanese bombers flying over a little league field? Come on! The torn American flag in the water with the drowning/dead sailors? We get it! It was a tragedy! One that, apparently, led to a nation's finest hour... dropping the atomic bomb on millions of Japanese citizens? Woo hoo! America triumphs! That's what they get for sneak attackin' our boys!
May 24, 2001, 3:32 p.m. CST
Stupid People
by Bandito
I must not be xenophobic, I must not be xenophobic, I must not be xenophobic. Okay, I'm not going to be xenophobic, but I am going to make a very sweeping statement here and say that every country in the world is full of morons. Including mine. There are very few people who's opinions are sound, and I am one of them. I have never met, nor heard of any of the others. Corporations own your opinions. When you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach that something you are doing doesn't feel right, then stop doing it.
May 24, 2001, 4:02 p.m. CST
Sure its gonna make more money than a blow salesman...
by MrCere
But most people are going to see the new Fellowship of The Ring movie, Part I of The One Movie. (wink)
May 24, 2001, 5:12 p.m. CST
So, Disney is cramming, "Come see this movie," down our throats.
by themightyra
Is this guy trying to cram down our throats, "Don't watch this movie?" It's role reversal manipulating!! But none the less, I LOVE this guy's sense of humor and choice of adjectives--assface---that made my day. Though I have to agree with him about Hollywood. Oh, and some movies are good for a dim-witted dumb romp through reality distraction...like Armageddon is! so what if it's dumb...it's good if you've been through a hard day...am I right? Hell yes I am!
May 24, 2001, 5:15 p.m. CST
Ha ha, you losers in them big cities have to pay $9 for a frieki
by themightyra
That's why you live in NEW MEXICO, where the theater tickers are $3 a piece...not shitting you!
May 24, 2001, 5:58 p.m. CST
did anyone else notice he spelled writing wrong?
by Dubious
I skimmed the article so I am not sure if he was going for irony. If he didn't then I believe we have a new definition for the term. Spelling writing wrong in a critique of a professionals writing? This is why I love the internet!
May 24, 2001, 6:14 p.m. CST
Exactly! Best review ever, even though he didn't see it. No ne
by The_Lion
May 24, 2001, 6:29 p.m. CST
I think I'll go see Shrek this weekend
by Bad Guy
May 24, 2001, 6:34 p.m. CST
I am NOT a tool
by Ben Affleck
I am an oscar winner. Suck on that! The new Tool album was good by the way.
May 24, 2001, 6:35 p.m. CST
A piece of shit that will make to much money
by Piddle
This review is exactly what I think of this movie. It's awful, spoon-fed hollywood trite. It's the absolute worst kind of cinema. Money shot, after money shot, after money shot. All because it looks cool. Or moves in slow motion. "Look, the hero is running towards his cheating girlfriend. Start to cry...(Ben starts running in slo-mo)..NOW!" I will never see this movie.__________PS. racurnutte, bitching about people who bitch, pure gold, classic.
May 24, 2001, 6:42 p.m. CST
Hey, Hallenbeck--no one cares!
by Lance Rock
And really--the Rosie O'Donnell "inner thigh" comment? What, are you fucking 18 or something? Harry, do us all a favor--spare us these childish rants from your bratty friends.
May 24, 2001, 6:43 p.m. CST
Joe you're my hero!!
by mrhappy
Damn, joe, you're an ugly phat phuk like Harry. But at least you tell 'em like it is. Just when I've almost given up my will to peer pressure from all my cinematically uneducated friends to go watch the crapfests in the theaters, its good to know that there's some sensible people in this world. Joe, you should go kill Eisner by sitting on him and then take over his position.
May 24, 2001, 7:04 p.m. CST
Damn Straight - Stay Home and watch "SECONDS"
by Darth Brooks
Criminy that Rock Hudson flick scares the bejesus out of me EVERY single time. If you worship the GOD named Frankenheimer, get this movie. Damn, and Murray Hamilton too. Leave those amateur filmakers behind and see how the MAN does it.
May 24, 2001, 7:38 p.m. CST
I have to agree with Ben Affleck
by Bad Guy
The new TOOL album is pretty good.
May 24, 2001, 7:40 p.m. CST
Hey Hallenback, I just wanted you to know YOU'RE NOT ALONE! I'm
by Basic Alias
I'm going to see Chopper down at the Bijou in Worcester, MA. Forget Bay and Fuckheimer, Armageddon was one of the most evil movies I've ever seen, yet another attempt to lower our nation's IQ. Personally, I'm hoping Pearl Harbor will be for them what Little Nicky was for Adam Sandler: a box office bomb and a wake-up call that you can't throw money at a bad script and make things all right. Strangely enough, I don't wish ill will on Sandler like I do on B&B, mostly because he just makes dumb movies because he enjoys working with his friends and doesn't seem to know better. Not so these other bastards. They're all about making money with smoke, mirrors and bullshit. And you know, I'm sick of the ego of some studios trying to convince the American public that if an event is important, than a movie about that event is just as great.
May 24, 2001, 7:55 p.m. CST
by Dash101
Its not about the spending of the $9 bucks. Its about giving the $9 to someone who doesnt DESRVE it. Joe, you are right on the money and I couldn't agree with you more. I'm glad you spoke out and Harry, Im glad you posted it. When are we going to realise film is an ART FORM, not just a money making machine!?? WELL SAID JOE, HEAR HEAR!!!
May 24, 2001, 8:19 p.m. CST
I'm with Hallenback...but he liked Bad Boyz?!
by devil0509
I absolutely refuse to support this bullshit slick glossing of human tragedy. Hallenbeck is 100% right about that - but what the fuck...he liked Bad Boyz? He thought the Rock was one of the best action flicks of all time?! Excuse me? The Rock was full or more holes than Hallenback's blow-up doll. Count the planes flying formation (god knows why) on the way to bomb the Rock. 6...no 5...now 6...5 again. Bay's so busy doing the visuals he can't even fucking count. Do right by those who died for our country - avoid this shallow attempt to turn a profit off their loss.
May 24, 2001, 8:47 p.m. CST
Hooray for well placed tirades!
by Sepulchrave
The tone may have been ranty and insane, but all the relevant points were made and coherence didn't suffer. Its only when you cant tell what some frothing hydrophobe is trying to spit that it really matters. Harrys reviews have been far worse. Anyhoo, speaking for all the elitest aesthete, poetry-writin' pink-wearin' preverts (sic) in Yerp (and is do presume to do so, Hah) I could give a shits about a percieved immorality of bombing a military installation, especially after all those atom bombs (civilians anyone?, whose crying over them?) and the Iraqi thing, which is still dragging bloodily on. This movie is more fascist self-justification dressed up as 'tragedy'. I wipe my ass with your flag. But I do it with mine too. Still, its ironic that the new multinationals, of which Bruckenheimer/ Disney ABC are emissary and empire, are still pulling this nationalism shit on the poor blind public, hiding the realities of the present and future with anodyne lies about the past. Would you say that its time for people to crack each others heads open and feast on the goo inside? Yes Kent, I would..
May 24, 2001, 8:48 p.m. CST
now that's entertainment
by Lizzybeth
..the review, that is, not the movie. It's been far too long between Hallenbeck appearences. Somebody chain this guy to a computer and feed him whatever drugs/alcohol he goes for so he can produce more crazy shit for this site.
May 24, 2001, 9:34 p.m. CST
Nice Annabella Chong reference, but who the hell is CHRIS PULA?
by Lenny Nero
I don't mean to seem ignorant. I'm just curious.
May 24, 2001, 9:40 p.m. CST
I always say you can't judge a book by its cover. I'm seeing th
by Lenny Nero
But then again, I see everything.
May 24, 2001, 9:44 p.m. CST
And has everyone forgotten about seeing an MATINEE? $6 max!
by Lenny Nero
Just see a fuckin' matinee! The audiences are usually better anyway. And you'll only have to complain about half the amount of money than originally. Also, what about seeing PEARL HARBOR and then SENAKING into another movie? I'm seeing PH tomorrow at noon, and at 3:30 there's a showing of SHREK. I can take the excess. I'm a film geek, for chrissakes! Day after I got back from Europe last summer I caught up with all the movies by seeing 5 movies in one day at the San Francisco Metreon: Titan A.E. (great great great), MI:2 (second time around I forgave it its weaknesses and gawked at the cool action scenens), Gone in 60 Seconds (not the shitfest you all say it is, but definitely not good), Shaft (good movie with great performance by Jeffrey Wright), and Chicken Run (ahhhh claymation, how I love thee!). So there! See a fuckin' matinee! Sneak! Stop bitching! Nuff said!
May 24, 2001, 10:12 p.m. CST
Hell yeah...
by Fitzy Funk
That was a great editorial. I was thinking about watching a matinee tomorrow, but after studying this article, I've searched my true feelings about the subject and realize there's no reason to go. Just for the record, I dug Bruckheimer Productions a helluva lot more back when he was working with Don Simpson. Say what you will, but they pumped out some fun ones: Top Gun (i appreciate it's camp factor...but did they??), Beverly Hills Cop (but definitely NOT the sequel), Crimson Tide (credit the strong acting Hackman and Washington brought to that one). Hell, I even liked Bay's previous Bad Boys, and loved The Rock, even though I admit I shouldn't. But Bruckheimer's track record without Simpson is as follows: Con Air (extremely mediocre action flick...can Simon West direct a good action film? I guess we'll see with Tomb Raider), Armaggedon (horrendous), Enemy of the State (surprisingly decent!), and then the trifecta of summer shit that he produced last year with Gone in Sixy Seconds (mediocre), Coyote Ugly (ugly..movie), and Remember the Titans (I forgot them). Point is, Bruckheimer is going down the shitter, and he is dragging down Bay, who is actually an amazingly talented but extremely misguided filmmaker, right down with him.
May 24, 2001, 11:01 p.m. CST
Think For Yourselves
by Daytripper69
That was an excellent Review from Hallenbeck. Who the hell is this guy?! Anyways, I was about to watch PH like a good little sheep til THIS review brought me back to my senses. IGNORE THE HYPE, DAMN IT! DON'T GIVE INTO DISNEY'S PUBLICITY MACHINE! DO SOMETHING MORE WORTHWHILE WITH YOUR TIME AND MONEY!
May 24, 2001, 11:06 p.m. CST
Better than I expected but still not very good
by FunkyChicken
Strange experience watching Pearl Harbor (I don't feel right calling it Pearl harbor cause I don't think it earns the name). Anyhow, I never cared much about the 3 main characters and thought the love story was weak and oversimplified. Everything in this movie looks too perfect and feels forced. This probably detracted from my becoming involved in it along with the fact that there really wasn't a whole lot going on. The attack was somewhat disturbing mainly due to ILM's excellent work. The Romance really feels thrown into this movie like they just needed a love story to bookend an attack on Pearl Harbor. Considering this movie is 3 hours long I don't feel I got much out of it. Luckily I got in for free so it only cost me 3 hours of my life. I have seen worse movies but something about this movie disturbs me. I think it is that Hollywood is going to make lots and lots of money on this tragic event and unlike another movie from a few years ago this movie doesn't have it's heart in the right place.
May 24, 2001, 11:12 p.m. CST
Most people
by Merkin Muffley
Don't know who Michael Bay is, nor do they care. Outside of our film obsessive world, he is hardly a brand-name. People just want to be entertained for a few hours.
May 25, 2001, 12:12 a.m. CST
I'd pay $9 to lick Rosie O'Donnell's inner thighs any day!
by Junior D-Girl
She's extremely tasty boys and juicy too. As for this Hallenbeck ugly fatso LOSER, get a life you creep. If that's really your picture I pity you. Get your act together, lose some weight, get a job and grow up for God's sake. Harry you can stay fat because you're funny and jolly like Santa Claus. But Joe you gotta go. Now I will follow the above link to read about your alleged crimes against Disney. Ciao for now kids. PS, I plan on seeing this movie Friday night with my sister d-girls, and yeah we know it's shmaltzy crap but we think Kate's hot. :)
May 25, 2001, 12:47 a.m. CST
by The Founder
I agree that complaining about spending money on a movie is petty. I go to the movies alot and most of the times I'm pleased with the movie. I actually have a good nose that can smell sh*t coming to a theater near you. I'm usually never wrong about a film after seeing the trailer, but I ain't perfect because I've been suckered a few times, with the worst being "Lost in Space" and "Species( boy I didn't smell those two coming, New Line and MGM must have sprayed those trailers with perfume)call me petty on these two, cause I was pissed on the money I lost(i was also younger and in college and had less money, so that may be more of the reason). Since I earn a good living now I will be seeing PH, and if I don't like it i'm still confident that the FX and battle sequences will be worth it as well as the LOTR trailer(with my luck it won't show in the showing I pick)so it won't be the end of the world if it's as bad as some of the reviews say. DON'T FORGET! PICK UP "ALICIA KEYS" ALBUM ON JUNE 12TH!!
May 25, 2001, 12:54 a.m. CST
Can Someone Please Email Me Or Post Here Why ARMAGEDDON Was So
by The Founder
I'm sorry guys, but I liked Armageddon. Sure it had some plot holes, but was it really as bad as you all say.Everytime theirs some big debate or we discuss B&B everyone comes down on this movie like a ton of bricks falling on a baby. Anyway someone explain the awfulness of this film to me bt posting here or e-mailing me at firstname.lastname@example.com Thank You.
May 25, 2001, 2:26 a.m. CST
Alternatives to "Pearl Harbor" -- "The Road Home"
by Art House
Fortunately, three other movies are opening this weekend and one movie has a great story for people of all ages. If you live in Los Angeles or New York City, you can go see a film called "The Road Home" starring Zhang Ziyi (Jen in "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon"). "The Road Home" has a MPAA rating of "G" so the whole family can enjoy the movie. If you are lucky enough to have a local theater showing "The Road Home," I recommend you go see this beautifully filmed love story and skip the "Pearl Harbor" hype. Here's hoping Sony will release "The Road Home" nationwide.
May 25, 2001, 2:59 a.m. CST
Armaggedon was bad because...
by carterburke
The movie was a collection of footage assembled to resemble a real film. On top of that it assumed the viewer hadn't seen any movies before! This picture is insulting on many levels. Blech.
May 25, 2001, 4:32 a.m. CST
by TectorGorch
I enjoyed this piece of writing. It was entertaining in a bitchy film student kind of way. Thanks for posting this bit of splendid grumpiness to brighten my morning. I spent yesterday morning in the hospital with a stress induced panic attack...had I seen this first I might have saved the trip. Again, Thank you for being entertaining.
May 25, 2001, 5:34 a.m. CST
dam this is the best review i've every read on this site!
by mooncake
May 25, 2001, 5:57 a.m. CST
by PKD
The review in one of Toronto's paper's hit it right on why not to see this movie. Japanese attack Pearl Harbor and we are subjected to scenes of humanity - pain, struggle, death, heroism - but when the Americans retaliate - it is shot form the sky without a seeing a single Japanese casualty. Hypocrisy has never looked so good!!
May 25, 2001, 6:02 a.m. CST
Someone please help me.......
by Mel Garga
I need to know if the LOTR trailer will be on this garbage. If you know, feel free to drop me a line. By the way, if anyone is interested in a bunch of reviews for PH, go to drudgereport.com ......this is how I personally discovered AICN and the wonderful world of Harry. Anyways, drudge has links to several reviews from major reviewers. (Ebert, AP, NY Times, NY POST, Variety, etc.) Not one, I repeat, not one of the reviews was anywhere near positive. This thing is getting panned. It is the next Battlefield Earth and will definitely win a razzy award or whatever the award is that proclaims the year's worst.
May 25, 2001, 6:25 a.m. CST
I did not here this shit over the Patriot
by spike fan
When Mad Mel Gibson was hacking people up just cause they were Britsh which made them evil or the fact it has Brits burning people in Church's or ignores the Slavery issue which since Gibsons charachter in real life was die hard SLaver is silly. NOPE ALL we got was the usual bollocks of its just a Movie do not take it to hart same goes for U571. Yet cause its an American film about American deaths its different what a bunch of hypocritical BULLSHIT
May 25, 2001, 6:32 a.m. CST
junior D-girl changed my mind!
by devil0509
I'm so excited and turned on by her sensuous writing that I think I will support Disney's shallow profiting off a historic tragedy in the hopes that junior d-girl and her sister d-girls will be there. They sound like hot little bisexual chicks and maybe if I sit really near them and look cool I can get into some funky me and a bunch of chicks orgy thing.
May 25, 2001, 6:50 a.m. CST
Chris Pula?
by Darth Brooks
He's the marketing director (if that's possible) of Warner Bros. Here's what he had to say about Harry in 1997: "Now anybody with a computer is a newspaper," Warner Bros. marketing chief Chris Pula told Variety. "One guy on the Internet could start enough of a stir that causes a reactionary shift in whole marketing program ... It's not fair that someone should review a screening that is not anything but the finished print."
May 25, 2001, 7:42 a.m. CST
Pearl Harbor review quote
by JAGUART
"Its a movie made by shameless hacks with too much money and way too much self-esteem" -Joanna Connors, Film Critic, CLEVELAND PLAIN DEALER
May 25, 2001, 7:53 a.m. CST
not all U.S. intelligence has been lost....
by Gustavo Cerati
The new TOOL album debuted at #1, selling an estimated 555,000 copies! Good for you gringos!!
May 25, 2001, 8:05 a.m. CST
by ethanhunt
May 25, 2001, 8:17 a.m. CST
Sixth Sense wasn't an original.
by Hagrid1
Most film freaks could figure out the twist ending of the movie if they ever watched a good Twilight Zone or even read Weird War Tales comic books growing up. Not that it wasn't a noble attempt to return to the genre, but it wasn't a mindblowing original either. (And X-Men, in my opinion, although a fun ass movie, was still too damn short).
May 25, 2001, 8:22 a.m. CST
Subliminal Clouds!
by JAGUART
In a pre-Japanese stike scene where a squadron of Zeros are flying over an amber wheat field filled with baby-carriages, if you look real hard you can see an image of Mickey Mouse himself formed in the clouds, ears and all! Its true I tell you!
May 25, 2001, 8:36 a.m. CST
bitter fuck!
by ethanhunt
you shouldnt be such a bitter bastard! come down off the high horse!!!!!!! and really the bashing of episode 1, get over it, if its such a bad movie, how come you clowns are still talking about it!! a bunch of twats witha load in your pants, thats what you fags sound like, go watch your charlie chaplin movies dick, have fun! let the rest of us form our own opinion! and really all your slang, ex:'wood! get over yourself you fuck!
May 25, 2001, 9:29 a.m. CST
by Chiz
Anabel Chong....hehehehe that singaporean slut! Rancid skanks aside, this review/sounding off is spot on. Affleck is attractive however and i find myself questioning my sexuality.
May 25, 2001, 9:47 a.m. CST
I guess Disney didn't have the money...
by PJoseph73
to pay for AICN to come hang out on the set and get some free goofy hats. They should know better. pJ
May 25, 2001, 10 a.m. CST
gonna skip this one...here's why...
by BarkingShins
After reading a great many reviews (one and a half stars from Ebert
May 25, 2001, 10:13 a.m. CST
amen Lenny Nero
by General Idea
Good call. I think I'll lay my 6 bucks down for something else & sneak into Pearl Harbor until I get too annoyed to stay. Why can't some of you pompous asses take a pill. Take Hallenbeck's tirade for what it's worth. He didn't see it, he's complaining about the reputation that they've made for themselves, and for all intents, what a steaming pile of feces this movie would inevitably become. If it were any good, he'd look ridiculous by now, but I haven't seen hardly ANYONE actually praise it. I don't watch/not watch films solely based on someone else's opinion. But I have sat through enough slop from these guys that I've made up my own mind about them. Even the one film I generally liked, The Rock, had so much silly dialogue I couldn't sit still. "Ya like Elton John? Well it's you! You're the rocket man!" Bwahahah! Bay/Bruckheimer should stick to fluffy simple-minded action like Con Air and Armageddon. At least we know what to expect from them by now... Oh and ComicArtist, last I checked the Marlins are ahead of the Mets in the standings, so keep dreamin'....
May 25, 2001, 11:44 a.m. CST
by Monkey Lord
As much as I expect Pearl Harbor to suck, I leave it at that... for the very reason that I EXPECT it to suck. I do not KNOW that it will suck... because knowledge is imparted through experience (i.e. phenomena that is acknowledged by the mind via our physical senses). Otherwise, you're speculating. Such as the gentleman above. He knows ZILCH about pearl harbor until he sees it. His lack of judgement and temperence is disturbing, and I'm surprised Harry put the article up in the first place.
May 25, 2001, 12:38 p.m. CST
You go, Joe! I agree with thee, 110%!!!! People if you have a
by Smugbug
Rent stacks of DVD, videos this weekend instead, catch up on some reading - or even as Mister Hallenbeck has said, go see Memento, Shrek - two very good movies. Let's encourage H-town to make more of these movies, and less of Pearl Harbor. I know I'm going to watch my copy of The Rock tonight. That's the type of movie Mr. Bay should stick to - that's all he's capable of.....
May 25, 2001, 12:55 p.m. CST
BTW: I'm watching my Flash Gordon DVD AGAIN tonight - at least
by Smugbug
making people think that it's a dramatic portrayal of US war history. Yeah, right. And Don Simpson never did blow......
May 25, 2001, 1:01 p.m. CST
King of All Bitter Assholes
by iamroman
Back when I read Hallenbeck's review of Episode I, I wondered to myself how Harry could allow such a bitter, brainless, crude, and utterly embarassing pile of shit article on his site. I figured either A) He's a really good friend of Harry's or B) He gives AMAZING head. Then it hit me: Hallenbeck is the ultimate representation of every bitter, life-hating asshole who posts in these talkbacks. He speaks for every degenerate who, being pissed off at his shitty workday at Taco Bell and getting banned for soliciting child porn on the EverQuest servers AGAIN, decides to take his frustrations out on every new movie made (especially anything involving Lucasfilm), in defense of a "golden age of cinema" that barely existed in the first place. And maybe he does it a little TOO well, which is why I suspect he may be just a fictional alter ego of Harry's after all. Anyways, shit like this is the reason I hardly read these talkbacks any more. The notion that I should actually respect the opinion of the crowd who praised that piece of shit RUSHMORE as a "smart, charming, hilarious gem of a film" makes me laugh.
May 25, 2001, 4:59 p.m. CST
What do you *really* think?
by bodvar
I must say that there's little to question in this review. It's an interesting notion, this "don't feed the trash-vomiting beast", but many if not most of us will eventually see your dreaded flick, like it or not. When I heard who wrote the screenplay, I began to smell a rat, and Disney's better at making movies about "lonesome cougars" and eerily animated Volkswagens than addressing history, but you take the things as they come. I *do* wonder, though...first, in the statement "You
May 25, 2001, 7:37 p.m. CST
To The Founder: "Armageddon" was a bad movie because of one spe
by LlGHTST0RMER
...the part immediately following the "Bruckheimer Films" logo and up to the film's closing credits. If there's a bright center to the universe of cinema, that is the film that it's farthest from.
May 26, 2001, 8:37 a.m. CST
Insane Tiki is right - Pearl harbor "legacy"
by ObiBen
I find it disturbing that all the film tag lines refer to a "new era", "America's finest hour". (You even see posters with the caption VICTORY at the top). Indeed, the "sneak attack" of Pearl Harbour (What? Did the White House expect a phone call & friendly chit-chat in the morning?) led to a major event that changed the human experience forever. Like Insane Tiki rightly pointed out, the retaliation to this "act of infamy" was the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Maybe the US phoned in just before, so introducing the world to the Nuclear Holocaust is not as infamous as the Pearl Harbour attack... Anyway, I wonder if someday a stupid love triangle plot involving pretty, fake people will be tacked on a film called "Hiroshima".
May 26, 2001, 3:40 p.m. CST
Already done, my friend ObiBen
by Sepulchrave
Except the Asians drpped the bomb on the states and everyone squealed in righteous indignation. It was called Independance Day, in which a locust race of slant-eyed aliens who devour resources are beaten by a wise cracking african american and a quirky New York Jew, throw in a WASP president and his and a fat likeable gay for comic relief and there you have it, american in a nutshell and not one asian in sight. Everybody knows that the Chinese are this huge threat to 'our way of life' and environmental disasters (Kyoto summit aside) and the Japs are stonefaced corporate robots with weird obtuse manners. We're obviously completely incompatible. lets blow up their spaceship and cheer.
May 26, 2001, 10 p.m. CST
Do you think Pearl Harbor has heart like
by Beebop
..Titanic? Titanic had two characters you cared about...can you care for the Pearl Harbor characters?
May 27, 2001, 11:14 a.m. CST
You are obviously a Disney plant.
by Smurfette
How can you unabashedly pump out these blatant Disney press releases and pawn them off as your own opinion. You're all a bunch of sell-outs. I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm clicking over to Film Threat, where integrity is not a bad word.
May 27, 2001, 3:29 p.m. CST
by DropKickMurphy
This was one funny ass guy.
May 27, 2001, 4:53 p.m. CST
Post your shit on Film Threat, you player haters.
by Cabron
You want to run down AICN, why don't you do it on the Film Threat site? Oh. I know why... Cause nobody ever reads it. I read that article in Hallenbeck. Don't hate the player, hate the game. Harry carved out his niche, and the other fanboy geeks are crying to mommy. Deal with it. That emotion you have is not a rush of integrity, it's jealousy. Chris Gore makes himself look petty and bitter whenever he posts AICN hater shit on his site. I would tell him to try and get his own TV deal instead of hating on Harry's, but he already did, and it went bust. Karma, motherfucker. Karma.
May 27, 2001, 11:26 p.m. CST
I hope you know I was being facecious(sp?)
by Smurfette
Joe is so obviously not a plant, as he ripped Mickey a new ass, that I thought I might point out Film Threat's flawed argument that AICN has evolved into a Studio schill site.
May 28, 2001, 6:43 a.m. CST
Boy! Am I glad...
by StephenG
...I live in London sometimes. At least I get a warning about the movies before they get here. When I lived in the LA area one might as well not bother going to the movies for all the promo crap you'd get piled on whenever you did! I put forth that there should be two prices one pays for going to the theater: the higher price for the film WITHOUT 20 minutes of blaring trailers, and the lower price WITH. This way you could choose whether you want your intelligence marginally insulted, or criminally so. It's not a surprise even with the fore-warning about Pearl Harbor that: 1. It's "Titanic", but with "lots of sinking ships" (as Ben put it) and an even lamer love story slapped on top of it; 2. The Japanese role is soft-pedaled as much as possible without people throwing eggs at the screen in revolted outrage; 3. It should have been a mini-series for TV with surround sound for all the substance involved; 4. Disney should go back to being serious about making films for children and cartoons, and stop trying to do a complete Jack Boot March over the rest of the industry, as if it's the only way to remain in the biz. Give me Tora! Tora! Tora! any day.
May 28, 2001, 10:20 a.m. CST
Joe, YOU ARE A STUPID FUCK
by Vindibudd
OKay? Lemme tell you what, this movie was not the greatest movie ever made. But: IT DID NOT SUCK NEARLY REMOTELY AS BAD AS YOU FUCKING SPOILED ROTTEN JERK-OFFS ARE SAYING. You people that write such vitriol about this film have ZERO respect and you need to grow the FUCK up. You would think from these damn critics that this was the biggest disaster since Waterworld, but I will tell you that this movie, though not a Saving Private Ryan by any means, is still a decent flick. I hope it makes $600 million just to spite you bitches that have no clue about what a film such as this would mean to the veterans and their families of this war. You bastards that rip this thing apart make me want to vomit. Hell, you give vomit a bad name. If you don't like it then fine, but don't shit all over the memory of those that died that day. It is their blood that let's your spoiled asses sit and bitch at your computers, cowards. So those that have not seen it, I urge you to go and see some of the great moments in our history as portrayed by such great performances as was given by Cuba Gooding, Jr. This is about the triumph of the American spirit. Too bad these Marxist maggots out there hate the human spirit. Damn bitches.
May 28, 2001, 6:41 p.m. CST
by alcester
I read a bunch of reviews, not to mention watching that dumbass movie critic on CNN trash this movie, most of the reviews were terrible but i still wanted to see this movie. so i went expecting the worst and guess what, i found myself really enjoying this film, it reminded me of those old 40's and 50's war movies.The diolouge was kind of corny, but i really liked the characters and the story. and of course the attack scene was awesome. I think there must of been some sort of conspiricy among the critics to trash this movie, ITS A GREAT MOVIE!
May 28, 2001, 9:24 p.m. CST
by Mr-Bigg
Glad your back...........
May 29, 2001, 12:53 a.m. CST
by 24frames
Well, from the reviews I have been reading about this movie, it doesn't seem worth watching. But I have another reason. My Grandfather died at Pearl Harbor. Yes, his remains are at the bottom somewhere. And I find this slick, flag waving, comic book violence, explosion ridden film disgusting. This was a real event, where real men died a terrible, meaningless death. I guess this comes from a generation whose closest experience to war is watching video game bombs fly into Iraqi airvents.(yes, I am a member of this generation). But I shudder when I think of Ben Affleck, or Cuba whatever are portraying the every man. Portraying the men dead at the bottom of that bay. I do like the WW2 films, and think there are very good ones. But this movie seems more about making good explosions with a historic signifigence. Tact seems to be in short supply these days. It seems the humanity is slowly drifting away from these movies about ww2. I think the previous generations did a much better job, mainly b/c they were all touched by it somehow. But hey what does that matter in the face of profits. I am sure that all those men fired their guns defiatly at those sneaky Japs, yelled and screamed mightely. Pounded their chests and squared their shoulders. I am sure they didn't shit themselves as their friends were blown apart next to them. Or start to cry when they realized that they were going to die violently at 18. Or even sitting at the bottom of the bay in a sunken ship, trapped, pounding, clawing at the hull, praying that they wont die in that metal coffin. Thanks, MR. Bruckheimer, and Bay, and Affleck, and Gooding, and all you others. My Grandpa would appreciate your accurate portrayal of the day that will live in infamy.
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posted 5 years ago
I really like to buy these for my dogs when they need to be kept busy for a while. My guys get really excited when these come out. I only use them on occasion due to the mess they make and to try and limit the GI upset that would probably happen if fed in excess. If you have a gulper you might want to supervise while feeding these because they will break into smaller pieces as the hoof comes apart.
Pros: keeps dogs' attention for a good long while
Cons: can break into some small pieces
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Great natural product
posted 6 years ago
This is a great long lasting chew for the LARGE, young dog cutting teeth. Should not be left with the dog unsupervised due to some small pieces that can break off and become a choking hazard.
Pros: Long lasting
Cons: Starts to smell if left for too long
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CNN's Eatocracy blog recently told the unfortunate tale of a "sender-backer."
"A what?" you ask.
A sender-backer, as in a cretinous man who makes a habit of cadging free meals from restaurants by sending back mostly eaten entrees. The CNN reporter who wrote the post had the (mis)fortune of sitting next to this man in a New York restaurant. After the guy sent back his steak, he explained the technique to his date. After sending back a small remaining portion of his dish, most waiters will ask if he'd prefer a replacement entree or having the item removed from the bill. He always chooses the latter.
People like this are doubly odious. One, because most restaurants operate on paper-thin profit margins and they can't afford to entertain jerks. Two, because he makes a bad name for the rest of us who send food back for good reason.
Most people I know never send food back. Even my wife demurs, preferring not to make a fuss because she'd never want to be mistaken for anyone remotely like our friend the sender-backer. She'd rather push around an inedible entree than be seen as a pushy broad.
Me, I'm a firm believer in sending food back — but in the right way.
When and how to send food back depends very much on the situation. Let's look at a few scenarios:
1. There's a foreign object in your food. It happens, even in the best restaurants. I have found all the usual items, as well as a sharp piece of metal wire from a twist tie in a salad, and a live worm crawling about the greenery that accompanied a bowl of pho.
I have also personally worked in kitchens where dishes come back — and not only with errant hairs. I've had to respond to buckshot in venison and, believe it or not, a men's wristwatch in a salad. The latter we traced to the produce delivery guy; the cooking student in charge of the salad station got a stern talking-to about being more careful when cleaning lettuce.
If you find something that doesn't belong in your food, call the waiter and — without question— ask to have your dish replaced. If you've already eaten most of it or feel too disgusted to eat anything more, alert the waiter, politely refuse replacement and let them decide how to handle the complaint.
2. Your food is over- or undercooked. Some steakhouses ask you to saw through the center of your steak to make sure it is cooked to your liking. If not, it's still a good idea to make a cut somewhere deep inside the steak to check.
If the steak is undercooked by a degree of doneness or more, you can ask to have the same piece of meat cooked further.
If it is overcooked, you can ask for a fresh steak.
With other kinds of protein, it's a good idea to first find out how the chef prepares it. Some like to serve medium-rare salmon or pink pork chops. If that's not for you, make sure you discuss your preferences with your waiter when you order.
So what about other foods that can be over- or undercooked — burnt pizza crust, say, or cold-centered eggrolls? Return them: You shouldn't have to pay for, or eat, food that isn't prepared correctly.
3. Your food is, for reasons particular to you, inedible. If you've got an allergy or a condition, such as celiac disease, that prevents you from eating certain foods, then it goes without saying that you should alert the waiter before ordering.
But what if your entree arrives and, without warning, is spicy enough to merit a "three chiles" rating on a Thai menu? Or what if you order a light-sounding pasta that comes swimming in an unannounced cream sauce?
I think, in these situations, you have every reason to send your dish back and expect a replacement. If you've made a good-faith effort to find out about a dish and discover it's extreme in a way you can't stomach, the restaurant needs to do a better job of describing it.
4. Your food is clumsily or poorly prepared. So the bottom half of the hamburger bun arrives so saturated with juice that it falls apart. The mixed greens, right from the bag, have those squiggly wilted bits that look like algae. The shrimp haven't been deveined. Here's where things start to get tricky.
You should definitely draw your server's attention to the problem if it bothers you enough that you don't enjoy the food, but let him or her offer to replace it. Or not: This is the litmus test.
If you're at a well-run restaurant that maintains certain standards, then they should admit they've let you, and themselves, down. Mistakes happen, and everyone will be happier when standards are upheld.
If you're at a restaurant, however, where the bar is set low and no replacement is offered, then you should suck it up and strike the restaurant from your list.
5. You just don't like the food. The sauce is a little salty. The chicken lacks flavor. There's a spice in there you don't appreciate. Should you return any dishes for these reasons?
No, but if the waiter asks how you like the food, be honest.
I recently ate at the restaurant John Dory Oyster Bar in New York. I started with two small plates and ended with a soup called "lobster panade" for my entree.
The waiter had warned me the soup was thin and didn't have any lobster meat, and the dish proved him a man of his word.
It was a russet broth made from the deeply roasted shells, with a caramelized — almost burnt — flavor lurking inside. I didn't find it appealing.
When the waiter came to ask how it was, I responded, "Fine." I wasn't going to lie and praise it, but I wasn't going to make a fuss and complain. Fine was an honest response.
"Just fine?" he asked, astutely picking up the clues. "We can always get you something else."
I insisted I was copacetic. Then he said something really smart. "Just flag me down if you change your mind."
After five minutes of pushing the soup around, I called the waiter over and ordered chorizo-stuffed squid. I loved this dish. "Are you going to finish the soup?" he asked. When I said "no," he quietly cleared it away.
The bill came, and the waiter told me he didn't charge me for the soup. "You didn't like it, so you shouldn't have to pay for it," he insisted.
This, people, is the definition of good service.
That said, I was ready to pay for the soup.
All you can expect a restaurant to do is replace a dish you return. Do not expect them to take it off the bill, or offer free dessert or drinks. If that happens, then appreciate the hospitality and reward the restaurant with your continued business.
But once you start expecting freebies, then you're no different from Mr. Sender-Backer.
February 21st, 2011
8:48 am
……I once had a meal at The Palm here in Atlanta – my kids (college age) were with me and the steak I was served was way not to "Palm" standards – even my kids commented that I ought to send it back. However, it was one of those nights/days where nothing had gone right for me, so I just said no, it is OK. I think I was using some sort of a "free entree" deal anyway, so I really was not out anything and thus,k did not want to make a big deal out of it.
However, near the end of the meal the wait person came over and acknowledged that my meal was not well prepared – I told them that was OK, I could handle it. The person repsonded, " Sir, this is The Palm – you will not be charged and we will provide a free dessert, too". I tried to protest since it was going to be free anyway, but they persisted and said that they would just comp another entree, too, not just the one they had misprepared.
Needless to say, I have returned to The Palm many times – Bone's could learn a thing or two from Willie and his crew….
February 21st, 2011
9:10 am
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Katie Smith and acookandherbook, John Kessler. John Kessler said: "Waiter, there's a watch in my salad." http://bit.ly/eITGkj [...]
February 21st, 2011
9:18 am
Typically, I'm like the first poster – I really don't send back meals that often. But, my reasoning is quite different.
There's been far too much discussion on blogs and forums by servers/kitchen staff about the "send back" that's really opened my eyes. If something is wrong, or not quite to my liking, I RARELY send something back. I will either pretend to eat it and make up some excuse as to why I didn't finish it (if asked by the server) or, I'll send it back and not ask for anything else to replace it.
It's shameful, yes, but I can't trust that my "send back" will return to me without any additional component added that I may not have been expected, if you know what I mean. I would prefer to just do without (and yes, sometimes still pay for it) than to worry that I've run up on a server who's had a bad day or thinks I'm being too picky or complaining and decided to augment my dish somehow.
It doesn't happen that often – rarely, in point of fact. And I'm certainly not saying that ALL servers/kitchen staff are prone to the additional augment of send-backs. I'm sure that's not the case. It's probably a very small percentage that would even consider it and even fewer that would carry through.
I just don't take the chance.
February 21st, 2011
9:25 am
I frequently get my Chinese take out fix from a little hole in the wall in Cumming, owned by a very nice couple. However, they've been overwhelmed by the demand for the food, and sometimes things get a little hectic.
I was in there not long ago at about 6:30. Placed my order, she said it would be about an hour. You can see right into the kitchen, and there were a lot of tickets ahead of mine. When I came back at 7:30, she was having to apologize to call in's that they could not fill their order tonight. They already had enough tickets that they would be cooking until at least 9:30, and they close at 9.
Got home, found an order of crab rangoon in the bag, marked "free". I went back a few days later for lunch, and thanked her for it. She said, "I know your daughter likes it, and you've been great about waiting for your food, so we wanted to do something nice.
Guess where I'm getting my Chinese food tonight? Yep, same place. And I would go there even if it wasn't the best Chinese food anywhere near here, just for the service.
February 21st, 2011
9:31 am
Worst send-back I ever had to do was at Wendy's. Did the drive through, ordered several sandwiches. Got home, got them out of the bag, and the third one down was a chicken sandwich that we did not order…that had several bites already taken out of it.
Yes, they'd stuck a half eaten chicken sandwich in the bag. Went back, and one of the line guys sees me walking up, walks over, picks up his sandwich, says, "oh, that's where that went". Then he picks it up, walks back to his station, opens it, takes a bite, lays it on the counter, and goes back to work.
He'd been eating on the line, and had apparently forgotten what he was doing, wrapped his own sandwich, and stuck it in my bag.
Managers only response was to say, "we didn't charge you for that, did we?" He never said a word to the guy who'd gone right back to eating while he was working on the line.
No apology, no nothing. I emailed corporate, and got back a generic thank you for your input note…not exactly a good response to a screw up like that.
Fortunately, the health department was a bit more receptive.
February 21st, 2011
9:55 am
[...] "Waiter, there's a watch in my salad." [...]
February 21st, 2011
10:00 am
I have never asked for a freebie. I have asked for a do over multiple times. I always tell my server what I think including too salty or under and overcooked. As a customer I think I have a responsibility to let the kitchen/chef know how they are coming across. I have found foreign objects in my food before, plastic and worms (sushi), stuff happens! From my 50 years of cooking, I realize all my dishes aren't going to be perfect. Without exception, everything I have ever complained about in a restaurant was taken care of. I also research the places I eat before I go on this thing called the internet. It seems to cut to the chase so I know what to expect before I go. While the employees and owners make some of the reviews, they can't do them all and I go to eat by consensus. Works for me.
February 21st, 2011
10:20 am
The worst "sender backers" I witnessed was a couple sitting at the table next to me at Ruth Chris's. They sent their steak back not once, not twice, but THREE times – each time eating about half of the steak before sending it back. On the third round, they had the server wrap up the steak to take home with them. I heard them ask for free drinks while they waited on their 3rd steak to be cooked. At the end of the meal they asked that the meal be comped because they had such a problem with the steaks. You could tell that the manager and server were onto the scam they were running but didn't want to make a scene in front of the entire restaurant by escorting them out. The only unfortunate thing was that we shared the same server and had pretty bad service becuase he was so preoccupied with helping the scammers sitting next to us.
February 21st, 2011
10:28 am
[...] here to see the original: How and When to Send Food Back | Food and More with John Kessler Uncategorized delivery-guy, foreign-object, salad, sharp-piece, the-greenery, twist-tie, [...]
February 21st, 2011
10:29 am
John, it seems to me that if a dish is sent back mostly eaten, (over half gone), it must have been enjoyed to some extent. Do restaurants really take items off the bill if they've been mostly eaten? Say it ain't so, Joe!
February 21st, 2011
10:40 am
Being a former server, I too, have had this happen numerous times only to know that this was a scam. Once I had a group of ladies come in and order salads…when I dropped the check off at the table (as were accustomed to do so when they were 3/4 of the way finished b/c it was lunch) one of the ladies said "This salad didn't taste right, can you please take it off of the bill". I went and got my manager, he obliged but made note of said woman…needless to say, a few weeks later she was back (with a different server), my manager remembered her when she tried the same thing…he said "I'm on to you, either you pay for it or I will call the APD for theft of services…and you aren't welcome here anymore".
At this same restaurant (which is now defunct), I had a couple come in for lunch and order our lunch fajita combo. They also ordered several rounds of margaritas, complaining all the while that there "wasn't enough tequila". I tried my best to cater to their whims to no avail, when I asked if they would care for anything else…the one lady said…"These fajitas taste like alpo". I knew this too was a scam and I went onto explain to her that if her fajitas did in fact taste like "alpo" why would she consume the whole plate only to complain about it and the end of her meal? Furthermore, our doors were closing for good in a few weeks so her continued patronage was of no ccncern to us. I went and told the manager on duty and he came and explained the same thing…if it tasted like "alpo" why not send it back to begin with? He told her he would comp the fajitas. Luckily, my manager was kind enough to comp the whole meal for me so that I can receive a very healthy tip since I had to deal with all of the crazy.
But seriously, how does she know what "alpo" tastes like? Does she eat dog food regularly?
February 21st, 2011
11:38 am
Serial sender-backers belong in the same club as the picture-takers hoping to get extra attention, free stuff…..
February 21st, 2011
11:40 am
I don't think I've ever sent anything back. Maybe I'm lucky or maybe my standards are low.
But, many years ago I was at a steakhouse in Miami with BF, BF's brother, and brother's girlfriend. Brother and girlfriend sent back the steaks that were at least 2/3 eaten and demanded they be removed from the bill. The server complied without a fuss. I was mortified. It was so obviously a scam. And they did it so smoothly, without any prior discussion, it was clear they were well-practiced in this stunt. I never showed my face in that restaurant again and luckily I didn't marry into that family.
So, sender-backers, do what you will but don't drag your innocent table-mates into your scam. It's akin to sticking up a convenience store while we wait in the car thinking you've run in for a pack of cigarettes.
February 21st, 2011
1:06 pm
Had to send a steak back at Ruth's Chris once… they gave me a ribeye instead of a filet… and it was still bleeding when I ordered medium – clear difference on both accounts. Our overall experience there that night was close to disastrous but I STILL hate to be a sender-backer, even when it is justified!
And no… I was not the person mentioned above who tried to get free stuff =) We paid for everything haha.
HOWEVER… true story… when my sister was in nursing school, her vegetarian friend sent a salad back when they accidentally put meat on it. A few days later she was ill with aches and a very sore throat, and doctor diagnosed her with some STD (I don't remember which one – chlamydia?) in her throat! She happened to have the leftovers in her fridge, and took them to the lab at school. Well, a person at the restaurant had "you-know-whatted" in her salad when she sent it back! AHHH!
So… that is why I about NEVER send anything back, especially at a lower-end or chain restaurant.
February 21st, 2011
1:31 pm
Looks like installment number one of educating the Atlanta diner. First you called out atl chefs, which I agreed with, now you have begun a long process of educating an incredibly diverse dining public. I look forward to more.
Don't forget guests that send food back because they don't know what they're ordering! FYI, boys and girls, carpaccio is served raw!
February 21st, 2011
1:34 pm
But let me ask wait staff readers: does it make a difference if the person asks nicely vs insultingly? (e.g., "This tastes like Alpo.")
February 21st, 2011
2:06 pm
ATLDiner, your last paragraph is exactly why I didn't send back the pizza with the burned crust last Sunday at a local chain. The kids running the ovens looked stoned and stupid, and I just sucked it up. However, I did place an anonymous call to the owner the next day.
February 21st, 2011
2:25 pm
I call BS on the spooge salad. That would have been national news. As far as sending something back I have to disagree with John. I do not think its right to send anything back because you do not like the taste. If it is prepared up to the proper standard and you still do not like it then that is on you. Too salty, too spicy? Thats all relative and they should not have to eat the cost because of it. I have also seen people complain about having to cut open a steak to show it is not cooked right. How else can they see? Most people seem to not understand what exactly a medium-rare steak is.
February 22nd, 2011
9:03 am
We went to the local "Short"Horn chain which usually serves a decent meal. We were seated in Mr. Jackass Server's section. He LOVES to be "The Man in Charge" and is frankly way tooo much for my husband and I. I ordered the ribeye, my usual cut of choice, and so did my husband. When the steaks arrived it looked a bit different than my husband's steak but being hungry I started in on it only to notice that it was not a ribeye but a New York cut., I flagged Mr. Server down and explained to him. He sat himself right down in the booth next to me and proceeded to explain that it was indeed a ribeye, just cut from the New York end of the ribeye. What a crock. He walked away quite confident that he "educated" another dumbass custumer. Thankfully the manager came by later to ask how our dinner was and when I told him the yarn about the "ribeye cut from the New York side" he comped my dinner. We do go back but will wait for a seat in someone else's section.
February 22nd, 2011
9:51 am
I have been a professional waiter for 20-some years. I can't speak for the Applebees/Chili's/chain restaurants, but I work in (mostly) very high-end restaurants and while we might WANT desperately to spit in your food or simply smack you upside the head for being a pain in the ass- there's a little thing called professional pride, and that's why we don't. If a reputable restaurant with a decent chef screws up your food, we want to know about it. I've had diners tell me "fine" when it's clearly not fine- I can see your rare tuna is pale pink, or your medium steak is brown. Mistakes and accidents happen. TELL US. We want to fix it, especially if it's our fault. Don't make me send in a manager to beat it out of you because you are being polite, just tell me; "This is over/undercooked." I'll fall all over myself to make it right. And please don't take wrongly cooked food out on me, either. There's a reason that I asked you five questions about your steak temperature….so I could get you exactly what you want. I used to carry paint chips at one steakhouse so I could show the customers exactly what colors to expect in the center of their food. I didn't cook it, I'll try to fix it, and I'll do fifteen times more work getting you what you want, so the 12% tip is kind of mean.
A good restaurant ALWAYS wants to know what they did wrong. Always.
And to the "oh, I am allergic to green peppers, I can't eat this" people- no, you aren't. You just don't want to a. appear picky to your table companions, or b. want to pick out the peppers yourself. With a real food allergy, it's literally the first thing out of your mouth to the waiter. "Hi, Greg, I am your customer and I am allergic to shellfish." You don't "forget" a food allergy.
February 22nd, 2011
9:52 am
I also call BS on the Chlamydia salad- that would have been a HUGE lawsuit and made the news.
February 22nd, 2011
9:55 am
I don't know why the blog thinks I have already posted the comment that's not appearing.
I have been a professional waiter for 20-some years. I can't speak for the Applebees/Chili's/chain restaurants, but I work in (mostly) very high-end restaurants and while we might WANT desperately to spit in your food or simply smack you upside the head for being a pain in the posterior- there's a little thing called professional pride, and that's why we don't. If a reputable restaurant with a decent chef screws up your food, we want to know about it. I've had diners tell me "fine" when it's clearly not fine- I can see your rare tuna is pale pink, or your medium steak is brown. Mistakes and accidents happen. TELL US. We want to fix it, especially if it's our fault. Don't make me send in a manager to beat it out of you because you are being polite, just tell me; "This is over/undercooked." I'll fall all over myself to make it right. And please don't take wrongly cooked food out on me, either. There's a reason that I asked you five questions about your steak temperature….so I could get you exactly what you want. I used to carry paint chips at one steakhouse so I could show the customers exactly what colors to expect in the center of their food. I didn't cook it, I'll try to fix it, and I'll do fifteen times more work getting you what you want, so the 12% tip is kind of mean.
A good restaurant ALWAYS wants to know what they did wrong. Always.
And to the "oh, I am allergic to green peppers, I can't eat this" people- no, you aren't. You just don't want to a. appear picky to your table companions, or b. want to pick out the peppers yourself. With a real food allergy, it's literally the first thing out of your mouth to the waiter. "Hi, Greg, I am your customer and I am allergic to shellfish." You don't "forget" a food allergy.
February 22nd, 2011
2:36 pm
To Rebellious, it isn't that we "forget" food allergies, we sometimes don't expect our food to come with an allergen that isn't specified on the menu. I'm allergic to bananas, not something I think much about because I am never going to order banana pudding. However, I have received them as garnish on French toast and ice cream and have had to do a send back.
February 22nd, 2011
3:30 pm
Michigander: I'm with Rebellious Rose. You should always mention your allergies up front. You never know whether there might be bananas or some other ingredient included in the marinade, or in the bread basket or as a garnish for a dessert. The server takes a lot of time learning all of the potential allergens in each dish in order to protect you, so just let him/her know what you can't eat and it won't come anywhere near your plate.
I also call BS on the spooge salad. No way that happened without it being all over the news. Typical urban legend.
February 23rd, 2011
2:25 pm
I agree with John. I don't send anything back just because it fails some minor quality test. However, if the preparation is such that it makes the dish totally inedible, then back it will go. I also am in perfect agreement with John that it is totally up to the establishment to determine how to make a wrong, right. If the determination is up to my standards, then off the list that place goes. As for one of the posters that did the send back at Wendy's – Really?!? Lol! Foodchecks at fast food establishments should be done BEFORE leaving the drive through or exiting the place. The manager could have denied the return and suggested that you ate the sandwich PRIOR to returning it to the restaurant. Great post John, keep up the good work and bravo to the server who noted professional integrity, let me add plain ole human dignity!
February 23rd, 2011
10:19 pm
I'm with Michigander. I'm also allergic to bananas and mention it to my server when it seems reasonable. But I once received a burrito described as a "flour tortilla filled with ground beef in a piquant sauce" whose special ingredient was bananas. Really? It might have occurred to me in LA or HI but this was a storefront Mexican joint next to the WalMart in Jasper, AL. The manager comped the meal but there's really no excuse for being that vague about allergens on a menu.
February 24th, 2011
10:45 pm
My friend and I had dinner at an Outback last week. She found a piece of a plastic tong in her salad. We told the waitresss and a manager came over and had the salad replaced and said that her meal would be free. when I got the check, another manager came over and said that both of our meals would be free.
February 25th, 2011
10:30 am
When my son was in college in Charlotte, he took a job at a newly opened Olive Garden as a go-fer. He was not waiting my table. I ordered a chicken-something pasta dish and when I began to eat it I noticed the chicken wouldn't slice with the butter knife I was given. I asked for a sharper knife and when I sliced the breast open I realized it had been cooked in its plastic freezer bag! I summoned my server and she immediately swooped up my plate without a word and took it to the kitchen. My entree was replaced, but for some reason I was no longer hungry. I have never eaten at Olive Garden anywhere since!


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Discount Ended: Nikon D600 w/24-85 for $2000
The big Nikon D600 with 24-85mm discount ended. It had been offered for a few days for $2000 which is the price of the body only. This blog-post is a general deal-ended alert since this was a big discount.
If you have a near-term interest in the D600 now, Adorama is offering the refurbished D600 body only for $1670.


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Comfort Zone Chops Lip Saver and Artificial Embouchure
Chops is an "artificial embouchure" that acts just as the natural embouchure does—as a fulcrum. It protects the inner bottom lip from the sharp bottom front teeth, allowing a brass or woodwind musician to play effortlessly and pain-free. Made of a special thermoplastic material, Chops allows the player to mold the artificial embouchure to his or her own teeth, ensuring a custom fit. Chops is designed to fit adult males, adult females and teen males. Teen or Petite Females and Children (boys and girls) should use the Chops Junior for the best fit.Chops and Chops Junior work by stretching the soft, vibration-absorbing skin in the natural embouchure of the bottom lip over the artificial one, causing this same soft skin to become harder. The sound emitted from the clarinet or saxophone will then be produced by the clear vibration of the reed, and not absorbed or disrupted by the skin. The less vibration absorbed by the skin, the better the tone. The secondary function of Chops and Chops Junior is to stop the cause of pain. How can a musician concentrate on his or her music if the inner bottom lip has to be babied due to soreness? When beginners first learn to play, their inner bottom lip is very tender and their teeth can be sharp, causing pain that inhibits their practicing. Couple this pain with discouraging squeaks due to a weak embouchure, and playing can become a chore instead of a joy. With no real practice time, the embouchure will never develop properly and the inner bottom lip will not strengthen. With Chops and Chops Junior, the embouchure can develop and the inner bottom lip will strengthen better against a smooth surface, rather than against sharp teeth. Students can now gain practice time as their embouchure develops, making the music teacher, parents and the student happy. The advancing player will practice and perform longer, and with less pain and discomfort, allowing them to continue to improve.If your inner bottom lip is sore and you wish to enhance your tone, then you've come to the right place. For those of you from the "No Pain—No Gain" school, please do not purchase this product—you will be "sorely" disappointed!
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*Free Ground shipping applies to Standard Ground shipping only to the lower 48 United States. Very large and oversize packages which are required to ship via freight may require additional shipping charges. See product description page or shopping cart. Other restrictions may apply. Online rental transaction excluded from this offer.


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Found July 21, 2013 on Indians Baseball Insider:
PLAYERS: Justin Masterson
TEAMS: Cleveland Indians, Minnesota Twins, Seattle Mariners
TEAMS: Cleveland Indians, Minnesota Twins, Seattle Mariners
MINNEAPOLIS – The Cleveland Indians topped the Minnesota Twins with a 7-1 victory on Sunday, spotlighted by a seven-inning no-hit bid from starter Justin Masterson. Masterson (10-7, 3.62) manned the mound in opposition of against Twins' lefty Scott Diamond (5-8, 5.29). The right-hander was one of two All-Stars representing the Indians last week while Diamond's previous outing was cut short due to rain. Masterson mowed down the Twins' lineup for seven innings as the Indians worked to craft him some run support. That support started in the second inning as first baseman Mark Reynolds drew a one-out walk and advanced to second on a fielder's choice that allowed left fielder Michael Brantley to reach first. The Indians loaded the bases as right fielder Ryan Raburn singled to left and third baseman Mike Aviles hit a sacrifice fly to score Reynolds. Two more touched the dish for the Indians in the following inning as shortstop Asdrubal Cabrera reached on a f...
Original Story: http://www.indiansbaseballinsider.com...
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Ideal for styling all types of hair, especially thicker
1 inch Tourmaline-treated ceramic plates for maximum negative ions and far infrared heat
Material: Ceramic Plates, Plastic, Metal Components
Brand: Corioliss
Origin: Imported
Corioliss, the darling of beauty blogs, has all the right stuff for transforming the hair you've got into the hair you want. Choose your weapons: from pro-grade, frizz-fighting straighteners like the ProStyle titanium flat Iron, to 1800-watt hair dryers in basic black or leopard print, the C1 blue leopard design styling iron, and Corioliss' amazing curling wands. Not to mention plenty of options that target specific hair types. Jennifer Aniston aside, few women are born with perfect hair — but with Corioliss, who needs to know?


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Decent Homes for All
Un libro in lingua di Nick Gallent edito da ROUTLEDGE, 2005
- € 39,00
- Il prezzo è variabile in funzione del cambio della valuta d'origine
Informazioni bibliografiche
- Titolo del Libro in lingua: Decent Homes for All
- Autore : Nick Gallent
- Editore: ROUTLEDGE
- Data di Pubblicazione: 01 Maggio '05
Are you concerned about the state of current housing provision? Worried about further decline in the years ahead? Decent Homes for All addresses fundamental questions about the current housing crisis; examining its history and evolution.
The first text on the housing-planning interface, it explores the relationship between planning and housing supply, focusing on housing supply, the quality and form of residential development, affordability and sustainability and the changing nature of planning itself. The questions covered include:
This comprehensive narrative provides students, planners and researchers with a valuable account of the evolving relationship between planning and housing to aid contextual understanding and suggest how current issues might evolve in the future.


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Interview: 'The Case Against 8′ filmmakers on trying not to get emotional
Ryan White and Ben Cotner discuss the making of "The Case Against 8," a documentary about the fight against Proposition 8," and how work is never done.
Freda Kelly finally dishes about working for the Beatles
The Beatles' longtime fan club secretary Freda Kelly spent years keeping stum about her job. Now she opens up, and only has good things to say.