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my dau is divorced at her instigation. her spouse was happily married. the children blame her for the break up of their home, are very angry and really do not want anything to do with her. They have called her names, and raged at her causing incredible pain.
are their others out there experiencing similiar trials? is their a support group of some kind. it seems to me that i meet so many divorced parents whose children have blamed them for their marriage and forced a separation which sometimes goes on for decades.
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I have been divorced from my 1st Husband for almost 18 years now. He was abusive, a drug dealer and an addict. I was from an alcoholic home with domestice violence so this is probably why and how I ended up here. As a codependent I could not set boundaries and put up with a lot. He got us all thrown in jail in 1989 and our kids taken from us for a short period of time till my Mother stepped in and got them. The kids were too young toremember much of what happened (ages 2 & 5)
I had 2 children, a girl & a boy. I left him when they were 10 & 7. My daughter loves her Father and has always resented me for leaving him. My son doesn't blame me for anything, he sees through his Fathers BS and doesn't play the "Mother Blame" Game like my daughter does. Her Father has gone down hill now for years and it is because of his drug addiction and bad lifestyle, not because I "Left Him' and ruined his everything. He tries to play wounded bear and my daughter buys into it. No child support ever or financial help unless it was coerced with an attorney's help.
Now that I am in a 12 Step Program. I see very clearly what has happened here and I try to mind my own business and not react to and the BS that has been sent my way from my daughter and ex. I love my daughter. but she is also codependent and over reacts and looks to lay blame on me for him. She denies it but I know it is true. I see the patterns.
I remarried too soon and my current husband is an alcoholic. He is not in recovery, but he is non practising. I go to my meetings and try to live my life One Day at a Time, not over reacting or have expectations of others. Changed Attitudes can change your life greatly. Al Anon has been very good for me and I am wondering if any of these other parents on this forum could relate to what I am talking about.
Substance Abuse causes so much heart ache and trouble for people. It is my hope that someday my daughter will understand why I left and that I love her and know that if she ever becomes a parent herself, she may be faced with hard choices too......
I left 14 months ago. I have 5 daughters - 2 adult , 2 teens & 8yr old. My oldest adult child supports me and my decision to leave (she said "I'm surprised you stayed as long as you did") my next daughter is angry and asks me to leave her alone. I'm fighting for custody and access in court dog the other 3. Its heart wrenching that they choose no contact with me
It might be helpful is the leaver would consult a forum like this - and understand completely the downside of their initiating divorce. The destruction of a family should not be taken lightly and has enormous consequences for all members. In my case, my wife has never told her nursing home bound mother about her divorcing me, but it was OK for my mother, dying of cancer, to learn of this. behavior like this does little to foster healthy relationships with children or other family
The leaver should be prepared to deal with the fallout - after all, they created the mess. My wife left me after 34 years, and immediately started a new "relationship" with a guy who has beaten both of his wives, is still married to the second one, and has a criminal conviction. She has been insistent that our 4 kids, now all adults, meet and accept him as her new partner. She suggested they all join the two of them at her home for New Years weekend, when she and the guy planned to room together. She was angry and accusative when they all refused. They are all embarrased by the choices she is making, while she accused them of being "immature, blaming her for the divorce and trying to sabotage her happiness". Youngsters have no choice but the accept this kind of behavior, but adult kids are free to reject her and her recklessness, which they have done. It's very hard to watch, especially since I was totally opposed to this divorce and still have feelings for her. So - a leaver shouldn't expect any sympathy, given the pain the have inflicted.
I am going through the same thing. I have been separated 2yrs and live an hr away from my kids but I drive that about 3 days a week because I miss them terribly! I am living with my bf and they have not met him. I have a 20, 18, and 16yr old. My 16yr old is very angry! I had an affair 2yrs ago (not with the bf). It was the biggest mistake of my life! I have always been a good mom and I want my children's forgiveness, but my husband always says things around them that he shouldn't. I need a support group of some kind. I'm depressed and I just want to stay in bed all the time! I would love to talk to other people going through the same things.
Going through it right now
I sit here and read these stores and feel sick to my stomach. I can identify and walking the tightrope of life and death as I find it hard to carry on without the kids I raised - My son left home after I asked him why he didnt wish me a HB when 5pm rolled around on my bday. He is 19 and was sittng there playing xbox. He and I got into a fight and he started yelling things I had never heard. I said fine then you can leave to dads then f you feel I am so horrible.
Yrs ago my 17 yr old was caught in bed with booze and pot and her BF while I was out. Her father lived in a condo about 4 miles from this home. We got into a fight and she hit me. She called the police and my ex came and picked up both kids. My son was 15 or 16 at the time. My son came home. My ex stood in my driveway one day saying she will be home by the weeks end. That wkend turned into wks, months then yrs. She never returned. I coudlnt bring myself to walk in her room without breaking down. It was like she was dead. She never came to see me but was always with her friends or BF right down the st from me. She would hang out at the coffee shop in the same plaza I had my business. But would not come to see me. Eventually when she did decide to stop in to see me she was rude, short tempered and insulting about everything I said or did. I would cry and she would run back to her father.
The wkend she was caught smoking pot and in bed with her BF across the hall from her brother in my home when she lived here - she went to live with her dad. Despite the divorce agreement, he did not notify me in advance he was leaving to go to Italy with some girl. He never even took me to the movies so I knew it had been going on linger than he let me know. Probably during our separation. ONCE DAY before he left and he was gong to leave my daughter in his posh digs without supervision after a wk of her being busted in my house.
So the yrs tick off. She graduates HS. She was rude to my family when they were here. My ex side of the family did not fly in to attend. Im sure they sent her tons of money and so forth as they always do. In fact my ex was late for her ceremony. I tried to stay friends as per his request after mediation but he became hateful and at one point tried to take both kids from me.
My son remained with me. He went through drug experimentation and I tried to get my ex to help me with it. He was suspended from school for giving another kid Ambien to get high. I took him to counseling and had him drug counseled. He had mood swings from childhood some of it was due to panic disorder he had since infancy - then turned to depression and anger issues.
Well he told me he would never leave me like my daughter and ex did. He told me he hated his dads new FIANCE and my daughter bitched about how he was such a control freak about where she went and with whom and how that she ended up crying. She had been living in an apt at a good college but lost her scholarship so her dad was only too happy to force her to move in with his new fiance and her. her weight jumped up and her bf of 3 yrs cheated on her.
Meanwhile my son lived with little hard core rules here in my home except to clean up and call me to lmk where he is. My ex got married the wkend b4 my BD and made my son BEST MAN and my daughter was in his fiances wedding p arty. My son started talking more like his dad when he came home. While I went to bat to help my son pick out colleges and encourage him to move to FL and attend there, his father was screaming NO he cant. Meanwhile, the economy presses on where I apply to new jobs almost 8 hrs a day in every state possible. I live in a house he and I own. he was supposed to buy this house from me but instead went over my head for that agreed discussion and bought one in an exclusive area with his wife. he cut off my son's support the wk he graduated knowing neither of us had jobs and had great difficulty finding one - despite my having a BS - but I had not worked in 20+yrs because i stayed home as per his request to raise the kids.
The following wkend was my bday. My daughter had come for a stop by which is RARE and as usual, was an hour and a half late but I was told not to argue this with her or she would push me more away. So had to suck up her already ongoing late show ups. So we had been talking about baby hood and I pulled out pictures to giggle over and she refused to look at them telling me I would get EMOTIONAL and start crying like a big baby.
i was not going to be pushes around like an idiot so i continued to look at them and pulled aside duplicates for her to keep and gave her pics of her dad when he was younger that his own mom gave me for his new wife to have. When he left me he said he would get the baby pictures at some point but never did. I simply figured oh hey - here is a nice gesture to give his wife. my daughter tarted screaming Ill bet her would effing love that! GREAT dea mom! Stop being fascetious calling her his WIFE! I burst into tears and told her that I would not be spoken to like this and there was no reason to treat me rudely. Her 21st bday was the following wk 2 days after mine and I knew after this she would ignore me again for months. And she has. when she was younger me, her and my moms bdays were all in a row and we celebrated them together. I told her we had better cut this visit short in order to not allow her to speak to me like this when I had done nothing to warrant that kind of outburst of hatred from her. She tried to backpaddle but I was still distraught about her fathers recent wedding. i had not even talked to them about it - but it still hurt.
I recall going to my exes house yrs ago with my son to discuss a problem with the thee of us and I walk into his rental home and a woman was throwing garbage bags around the house as if she was mad. THe decor had changed since the month prior when I stopped by. Turns out it was his fiance. He never told me and did not warn me prior to my walking in there. He was sitting there yelling at my son about character and respect - which was ironic given what I saw. We got up and left. Not before he called me the C word.
So after my ex husbands wedding my son failed to return the Sunday he said he would. He was gone fri-monday and I was frantic by Monday. He decided to say he told me he was going to a friends house Monday and would not be home and I MUST have forgot - because I am old of course.
That wk he began talking like his dad and trying to get serious about college and his father and I were to sit down with my son and discuss it with him. Of course he would not return my calls. So once again, he pulled his child support the day he graduated from HS and I had no means to feed my son. Nice maneuver. He knew I have been looking for a job anywhere and it was not working as it is not for many newly poor americans. But he said he did not have to pay anymore. I mean the WK my son graduated. My son started acting differently and spending more time at his dads. New shoes. New expensive sunglasses. Wads of money.
So the bday comes. He never gave me a card or said lets take a walk. NOTHING. He said he thought I might be in a bad mood. I was shocked. We got into a fight and he left and moved in with his dad, his sister and his fathers NEVER BEEN MARRIED CHILDLESS WIFE. Wks have gone by and my ex finallly decides to tell me he is not coming back and he wont be going to school in FL like he wanted to. He will be living there and does not want to live with me anymore.
My son and I have been together since he was an infant. His father traveled all the time. He was as close to me as a son could get. Someone has told him his dad is the way to be and your mother is an embarrassment and to walk away from her. My son once hugged me and said he would never abanadon me the way my ex and my daughter did. My son and I did a lot together - small things like get coffee. I supported him in his many bands, stuck up for him when his father was cruel to him. I held him when his 1st gf left him sobbing in my arms at age 18. I took care of him when he was sick. I would text him every day telling him I loved him and to be careful. I would ask him if he was okay.
Now nothing.
My ex wont let me speak to him and says he does not want to talk to me. He screams into the phone that I created this SH*TSTORM but I have not.
He managed to encourage hatred in my kids. I am now poor and have no money though I try relentlessly for employment. I want to die. My family is out of state and have not cared about me or my lfe.
I miss my kds. I cant see them and my husband (EX) is a manipulative person who had the goal of enjoying them once I did the hard work - he can kcik back and not have to change diapers or listen to screming kids or playdates.
I am devastated and seriously - this is the first site I found where someone knows how much of a death this feels like. I needed to know I am not alone. God please give us all the strength to not hurt ths bad.
no Cindi you are not alone. I pretty much walked away from stuff. I signed over the house that was almost paid for and I might add took out my 401k money to save the house while we were seperated because he wouldn't give me any money. I left the hot tub and other things. They were just things and I wanted to get thru the divorce with the least turmoil as possible. I had met another man and it's all my fault why we are not a family anymore. "How can you just walk away" "from this? from dad?" I was asked this repeatedly until it was final. Now, I hear nothing from my son and my daughter just contacts me when she wants or needs something. I often ask myself, "Am I the only one out there that has ever had an affair and has to deal with this trauma forever?" Surely to goodness when these 2 kids get married and has that marrital bless -or non-bliss, they will get out of the box and understand???? Surely??? Why haven't they ever asked if I'm happy? They have all told me how they feel but, do you think they have asked how I feel? The only thing that I'm told from my ex from time to time is........ This is what you wanted and I'll never understand how you just walked away.
After 21 years of marriage. I divorced my kids dad. I have 2 kids. I also gave my life to them. It was all about my kids. Since the divorce my 22 year old son won't talk to me. He's not proud of me because of me divorcing his dad. My daughter has been compliant. It's definatly a rough road and I cry almost daily. Everyone says it will get better and my son will come around. It's been 4 years this summer............ Still no contact. I have sent him text messages from time to time to try to make him understand I still love him and when he is ready I'll be there............. No response. Very depressing, very frustrated,,,,, very hard to deal with.
i too have lost 2 daughters. it has been 10 years. they were angry and said terrible things to me before the divorce because of their father but it has continued through the years. there are few people who understand it. most believe it is only my fault, that i brought it about divorcing their fatheraas my daughters do. i cry almost daily. i tried for years to hang on but in the past year i've givven up because the price has taken a toll on me to the point i feel suicidal. my whole life was about my children and it is all gone. i have 2 grandchildren i will never know. i no longer want to go on.
I am sorry to hear that you are being hurt like this. You are living my greatest fear. I am glad that you have remarried and have that support as well. I hope your kids will come around.
I am sorry to hear about this situation. You have just described my greatest fear, and one of the things keeping me from filing for a divorce. I love my children dearly; I do not know how much longer I can live with their mother. My wife is a very controlling woman (who has threatened my life - legitimate threats, not just kidding) and I am fairly confident that she will do something like this when I leave.
I hope that Mayflower Mom's experience will eventually be your daughter's as well, and also mine -- at least the part about the kid(s) finding the truth independently. Parental Alienation is cruel to the children. I know, as the child of divorced parents.
The only "advice" i can offer (if I may be so bold) is to tell your daughter to remain civil and not to speak badly about the children's father. Eventually, the children should figure things out on their own. That is my hope in my own situation. The emotional pain of the though of my children "hating" me is almost too much, especially for our oldest son.
I suspect that the children are trying to find someone to blame. People like to assign blame for everything bad, and children are even more prone to do that. Often they will blame themselves for a divorce. I did. Other times they will blame the parent who is no longer "there". Divorce is hard on kids.
I am glad to see that you are there for your daughter. My parents (mom and step-dad) are 1000 miles away. I hope that they will be as supportive as you are.
I initiated the divorce from my husband and am closer than ever with my son. My ex told lies about me, but my son realized it was "sour grapes" and his dad was just trying to save face after being left. He is close to both of us. My friend, on the other hand, has kids who blame him for "abandoning" them--a term their mother coined. Needless to say, he did nothing of the sort--put all of them through Ivy league schools and saw them and supported them all the time. However, both his wife and my ex tried to put a wedge between the "leaving" parent and the kids as "payback." I told my friend he has obviously given his kids the idea that they have a right to "straighten him out" and "rage at" him--he admitted that this kind of abuse was common in their household and taught to the kids by both him and his wife. So there you go--have you ever considered that you or your mate "taught" your kids that it's their right to tell you how to live? That their "incredible" pain is more legitimate than yours? Note that you have likely refrained from telling your kids the real truth about your problem with their other parent--and you were right! However, you do get to say--and I recommend this--to them, "you do not know ANYthing about what my relationship with your X was and I am amazed that you would think it is your place to try and lecture me." Children do NOT lecture adults and certainly not about their parents' private relationship. My son has commented often that he knows he does not know what happened and frankly is glad to not know because it was not his business. He was greatly saddened at the time but tells people often he is glad his parents have good lives now and are happy. Plenty of parents engage in "Parental Alienation" -- they are the scum of the earth.
I know where you are coming from, my children treat me the same way, they say that they are never gonna forgive me for breaking up the family which I hate. I am so depressed about this and feel like I'm the only one that is going thru this.
I know exactly what you mean, I am going thru the same thing with my kids. I divorced their dad, they are teens and blame me for breaking the family up. They say terrible things to me, will not see me or talk to me. I have remarried and they say they will never come around, they will not even give my husband a chance, they day terrible things about him too. They say i'm a sorry mom, we used to be sooo close and now they have alienated me.. It breaks my heart everyday!!! They tell me all the time that its my fault their dad struggles with money even though i pay him child support. I'm glad to see that i am not alone out there.
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Juelz Santana - Soft
Artist: Juelz Santana
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Album: God Will'n'
Avg Rating: 2.3 ( 12 total votes )
Think Juelz Santana's coming too hard? The Harlem rhymesayer begs to differ—according to his latest mixtape single, it's his competition that's too Soft. The artist's first DJBooth feature since January 2010's Home Run, this street-ready selection sees the Dipset affiliate examining both the positive and negative sides of the titular adjective, luxuriating in the texture of the leather seats in his whip while excoriating sucker emcees for their lack of backbone. Joining the headliner over Young Shun's synth-percussion boardwork, Ricky Rozay, Meek Mill and Fabolous provide aggressive, braggadocious guest bars. Feeling it? You can expect more bangers where this came from on forthcoming street album God Will'n, scheduled for digital release on the 14th.
Listen to More: Juelz Santana, Rick Ross, Fabolous, Meek Mill , Downloads, Hitmaker, Street Banger
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Mr. Fry may be very clever, but my guess is he would be quite poor at dressage.
For my part, I have failed Red Cross Beginner's swimming lessons twice and, if my memory could shake the block, I probably have failed three times, but can't admit it to myself. So I fancy myself as a bit of an expert in that field. And I want the medal! X


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"If you can't you must, and if you must you can."
― Anthony Robbins
This week is all about YOU.
I want you to take 20 seconds and share your most important goal with our community in the comments at the end of this post.
Plus we have a cool new comment systems we're testing that we hope will help more people jump into the discussion and connect with each other. Please try it out!
Hopefully, you've already had time to complete our 100% free Goal Setting & Action Workbook. But either way, I know you have at least one goal you could list.
Live Your Legend is not a resource to read about ideas.
Live Your Legend is a community whose sole purpose is to inspire you to take action to do the work that most matters to you and to the world. And then to provide you the tools to make it possible.
If you don't take action on those ideas and tools, then everything we do here is for nothing.
So today is about accountability.
Studies in psychology and persuasion constantly prove the same thing: The more we talk about things and the more we commit to others, the more likely it is that we'll make them reality.
Robert Cialdini, author of Influence, calls it Commitment & Consistency, and we all succumb to it every single day. From Cialdini's Wikipedia: If people commit, orally or in writing, to an idea or goal, they are more likely to honor that commitment because of establishing that idea or goal as being congruent with their self-image.
If We Must, We Can.
Tony Robbins has always said, "If you can't you must, and if you must you can." Think about the power in the statement. If we know we must do something, we do not question if it's possible. We skip right past that step and start thinking of how to make it a reality.
On and to add to the fun, I am publishing a video interview with Tony's ex-General Manager in the next week or so where we'll dig deep into musts, momentum and accountability. Stay tuned!
For now it's time to get clear on what is a MUST for each of us.
If 2013 is the year everything changes (and indeed it is), then please join us in sharing at least one of your musts in the comments. Bonus points for telling us why it's a must, and for commenting on one other reader's goal as well.
To get the party started, here are my biggest plans for 2013, separated by personal and business, although the two tend to feel more and more the same these days.
As I do every week during my weekly planning, I'll start with my personal mission and purpose:
Mission: To be an explorer. Make discoveries and put a dent in the world! Live a happy, generous, grateful, calm, unrushed and passionate life, with extraordinary relationships and better the lives of others. No regrets.
Purpose: To let my passion, energy and love for life be a guiding light to teach and inspire those around me to live the life they deserve and live to their highest standards.
Building & Helping the Live Your Legend Community – My 2013 Goals:
1. Launch a real-time fully-exposed case study on how to take a physical product from idea, to market testing, to manufacturing and to selling — all by using today's online tools. This is going to be our biggest project EVER, and we are going to take you along for every step of the ride. Keep an ear out for the launch of the new site to track this project as well as what the physical product will actually be. I could not sleep this weekend because I was so excited for it.
The goal is to provide a very detailed road map for breathing life into your own idea and how to do it in a very low-risk way. We believe that with the right environment, anyone can be inspired to turn their ideas into action and reality. We want to provide that environment and the process to make it possible.
Imagine what would start to happen if we could reframe failure so that the only way to fail is if you never start. Where success is defined by whether you take a shot at your dream or not. Just wait until you see what we have in store — and we are going to want you involved in a very big way!
2. Launch two more live classes for our How to Connect with Anyone interactive course and community. The next opening will be around February 20th. There will be very limited spots and last time they sold out in under three days, so keep an eye out and be sure to sign up for the pre-launch group here!
3. Begin to partner with some of the biggest, most respected and influential people in the world to inspire others to do work that makes them come alive. The first person on my list to get on board is Taylor Swift (and this is not just because I'm a big fan of her story and music). The influence she has on the coming generation is more powerful than most anyone in the world. Imagine if that power could be focused on further helping kids pursue their dreams. I don't know how I'll do this, but I believe it will happen. If anyone knows Taylor, please let me know!
4. Do a full redesign of Live Your Legend to better focus our message, our ability to help all of you and add in a large free community network portion so all you can better connect.
5. Publish The Ultimate Guide to Creating Your Ideal Mastermind Group – a comprehensive beautifully-designed 52-page interactive workbook to show you how to surround yourself with the people who won't let you fail. That's coming in a few weeks thanks to our newest team member, Liz Seda, who I'll tell you plenty more about soon. This tool will also be 100% free.
6. Host a large Live Your Legend LIVE event like we did at Samovar last year. But bigger and better…
7. Launch the Live Your Legend LIVE Field Kit – a series of documents and tools that will serve as a complete guide for anyone to host a LYL LIVE meetup or event anywhere in the world. I know a lot of you have asked for this and I hope we'll have it done soon!
8. Create a fully redesigned version of our Live Off Your Passion career course, complete with membership site, HD videos, interactive community and step-by-step modules — very similar to how we've structured How to Connect with Anyone.
9. Create a comprehensive resource for exactly what to do before, during and after you quit your job to live your legend. This will include everything from how to pick the right health care package, what to do with your 401k, what budget and expenses to expect and ton of other stuff. I constantly get asked about this and it's about time I leverage what my partners and I have learned in the investment and entrepreneurship world to offer you the resource I wish I had when I quit.
10. Create a service and/or more tailored tool or coaching program to help those making the very daunting transition from hating their job to doing work that matters. It will cover the items above (and lot's more) in a more personalized way. I'm not exactly sure how we'll do this, but I know there's a way, and we want to help as best we can. There's too much I've learned from running an investment partnership for nearly five years that you all should get to hear about.
11. Host a contest to choose a handful of people and projects to mentor and support as you pursue what matters most to you. Think The Voice TV show, but for changing the world. Going to be SO fun!
12. Build and solidify a team at Live Your Legend that makes all of this possible. I'm excited to say that I can no longer run Live Your Legend on my own. I'll be announcing some big additions to our team soon.
And a few things from the personal side:
1. Explore Thailand, Croatia and Greece with my wife and family, and hopefully get out fly fishing with my dad on the Kamchatka Peninsula in eastern Russia.
2. Take a weekly breakdancing class with my wife. The perfect date/workout/adventure combination!
3. Learn to surf. Ideally through a surf camp in Mexico or Costa Rica.
4. Run a 50 mile footrace. Still on the fence on this one.
So that's a taste of what I have in mind…
As you can probably tell, I think 2013 is going to be HUGE for all of us. And in case you're wondering, YES, writing out the above makes me a tad terrified, but knowing that I have all of you in my corner is what makes it even remotely possible. And that makes me crazy excited!
No one does anything alone.
Together anything is possible.
Now it's your turn.
What's your most important goal of 2013? Tell us your biggest MUST in the comments!
Just one sentence is all we ask for. Get accountable to what matters. Let us know your plans so we can find a way to help.
And for bonus points leave a response of encouragement for someone else too!
Time for some magic,
- Scott
P.S. Email readers please click here to comment
Here's something I think will be a huge help for many of your goals…
Over a year ago, one my of my closest web friends and entrepreneurs, Corbett Barr, told me he had this huge and terrifying dream of creating a resource and community for teaching people how to build honest online businesses around their passion. Each week since then we've traded ideas as he built upon this vision.
And after months of private beta-testing, his dream, his MUST, is finally live and it has blown my mind. The name of this new site is Fizzle and as of this morning at 9am it's finally open to the public.
- Fizzle is online business training (everything from core business concepts to tech/how-to to product comparisons and more)
- From experts including the Fizzle Team (Corbett Barr, Chase Reeves and Caleb Wojcik) and special guests (including Leo Babauta, Pat Flynn, Brett Kelly and more).
- In easy to watch videos broken into bite-sized chunks
- Built for you to learn at your own pace all alongside a supportive, vibrant community
- For one low monthly price
Oh and I also did a super fun 5-hour video shoot with them on the basics of How to Connect with Anyone, which just went live yesterday!
Fizzle is so new that they don't even have an affiliate program set up yet. That means I will be getting exactly zero dollars for promoting it today. But that doesn't matter to me because this is the best online training I've seen and you all have to hear about it!
The full Fizzle course library can be found on the main Fizzle page here.
They're also offering a special 50% first month discount for 24 hours starting today at 9am today.
Congrats to Corbett and his team for building such a needed resource. Can't wait to hear what you guys think!
Ok now please leave a one-sentence comment and tell us your big goal for 2013!
P.P.S. Oh and the final round of World Domination Summit tickets go on sale starting right now. By far my favorite event for meeting fellow entrepreneurs and world changers all year. They sell out fast. Grab a ticket here.
186 Responses to "Ask the Reader: What One Goal Is a MUST for You in 2013? (Plus the surprising plans for LYL)"
My biggest "must" for 2013 is to build myself a following of a few thousand people.
I'm amazing at making products (particularly software/web-apps) but I've never been so amazing at finding people to use them. This year is about learning how to engage people and to create products that they really want. Through learning to build a following, I'll be learning how to find and engage an audience.
Best of luck yourself this year, Scott
share a link!
Have you ever though of teaching others? I might be interested to follow on that)
I would also like to learn. I have some ideas for apps but don't know how to implement them.
Be gigging once every week (at least) with my new band, Claude Canvas. Make an album greater and even more passionate than my last one http://steggers.bandcamp.com/ (listen to tracks 2, 4 and 11 for representation, the whole thing is free). To live with the burning passionate creative fire I have within me and not suppress it. To live is if I was 19 again and stop regretting the last 10 years, but focus on the next.
Loving the recognition of the 'passionate creative fire'. good luck!
Launch my course and coaching program with a re-brand to work with other people to quit making excuses and start taking action. Stay tuned!
Get my business rocking!
Double the size of my local cleaning business!
Kim: That sounds like a terrific goal! I wish you well in your endeavor this year, and know it's small buisness owners like yourself who keep our economy from going under! God luck!
I am finally admitting that what I have always wanted to do is write. My goals for 2013 are to complete the three novels I have in rough draft and publish them. Draft a new novel during the month of November. One novel must be completed by the end of February so that I can take advantage of a book review offer.
Good luck with your writing.
The revision process is almost as hard as the writing. Stick with it, you can do it!
Let us know ones you done with ur novel, v also eager to read it :). Good luck dear frnd.
Change the story inside my head from struggling single mom to strong person with capacities and skills to build my fledgling service, healingoutdoors.org. To go deep into ecopsychology training in order to share those tools with others.
I love that you say "change the story." So amazing how influential the stories we tell ourselves are. I like the strong person story, she is shining right through the page.
What a great service to offer! I'm sure there are so many people who would benefit from that
I like it "change d story", best of luck.
Complete my Business Process Bootcamp Pilot ('From Whacky Races to Formula One') with 3 customers, by end August 2013
Specific! Keepin' it real. Good work! Keep it up
…oh, and publish my book! (Just finished first draft)
I *must* start a movement to change how companies and people interview. Corporate and personal success will come to those who embrace a "solution provider" mindset and away from the old-school 'hiring manager/candidate' mindset.
I *must* move to Colorado by October.
BTW, I can't get rid of your pop-up so I couldn't submit my comment in IE9, I had to open Firefox.
My 2013 Goal (besides running a Spartan race and Marathon): Make huge strides with my blog, relaunching it in a few months and starting the path down the road to working for myself
Write 12 Kindle books, aiming for 1 each month.
Wow nice! Specific, I like it.
Thank you
Good stuff. Do you have topics picked for your books?
Please see above
Ambitious, Jamie. What is the subject of your books?
One of them is related to my blog and will be one of the last ones. The rest are a mixture of fiction and non-fiction. A couple of diet/fitness ones I want to write because of so much crap I see getting thrown about. Those aren't meant to be money makers, just to get stuff off my chest lol. I want to write a fiction series with underlying self-help themes. Again, it's just stuff I want to speak about that have changed my life and I want to write them as a fictional story. I'm currently trying to plan these out.
That's a very good idea!
It reminds me of "The Ultimate Gift" book, have you seen it?
I LOVE the Ultimate Gift. Read it every year around the holidays. The movie is really good too!
I've not, but I searched for it on Wiki. It's nothing as fancy as that TBH. Just the fact I can write a decent amount of words in 30 days + edit it. I'm just using the 12 books thing because I'm a little OCD and it helps keep things in order lol
Very nice – good luck!
Create a non-profit community resource hub connecting passionate people with volunteer work they love
A fantastic idea Candice. I wish you all the best.
Yes! I would totally use that. The ones out there that I've found just haven't really worked that well for me…
Excellent, Candice. I run the local fibro/cfs support community and I am just starting to try to understand how we could get volunteers interested in helping with our community. There is such a huge need.
Nice one Candice, its what society needs. People giving back and making our community a community.
That's great! I started something similar last year but it hasn't taken off quite yet. I'd love to hear about your ideas.
Sounds wonderful! I would love to hear how you started/launched it!
We started out as a group of likeminded individuals mainly from the office where I used to work. We taught English to kids (beneficiaries of an Non-Government Organization) every Sunday. That's how we started.
I live in the Philippines and there are a number of NGO's here. Some of them have the financial resources but do not have the right manpower to effectively implement some of their programs. So I aim to fill that need (hopefully create an entire brigade all over the country, albeit slowly). I dream big, don't I? LOL.
I have a few projects lined up. It's not official yet. And there's going to be some difficulty because I'm moving to a different island soon. But I'll do what I can.
What about you? What's your aim?
Don't you guys want to make it worldwide?
Sounds like a great idea!
Good idea Candice, wish you all d best dear frnd and may God bless U.
Earn money from creating entertainment online (youtube videos, music, etc.)
That sounds awesome leeorr. Any ideas about what you want to create? Do you have anything ready to share ? Best of luck!
Thanks! Nothing to share yet, but I'm thinking of 3-5 minute comic musical videos.
Comic musical videos are always fun. I don't even watch musical videos anymore because they all are the same. So adding some humor will definitely make it more enjoyable and unique. Are these videos for your own music or for other people? Best of luck.
I don't really mean "music videos" for the most part… more like short musicals (i.e. there would exist a narritive, a few short songs (originals or parodies), etc…). At least thats part of the vision, I'll see how it goes..
That sounds really interesting and unique. Best of luck!
Apply to medical school! Find out how to start a non-profit business for homeless, go on my first missions trip with my church to the Yucatan p. in Mexico, go on an unpaid internship to Washington, D.C. to explore the Obamacare Administration, go to London to learn differences in International Medicine. Whew, for me thats alot but Im going to check in more here and really use the tools and Im sure it's going to happen, especially with you guys!!!
And Phillip, Im going to not dwell on the last ten years either! Now is what we make it!!
If I was to choose a single goal, that is an absolute must, then it has to this:
To build a core of 100 or more people, who have completed 2Have2Be2Do Life design system, shared their results and committed long-term.
This is a must, because the system needs further testing, polishing and would also enable me to help and advice these core people along the way.
Simply put, it has to be done and I will do this in 2013, no matter what
Sounds great! Good luck!
Sounds very good, best wishes friend.
My goals are to get back to 180lbs with a maximum of 11% body fat. Eat healthy, more fruits and vegetables. Finalize my blog and start inspiring people!
They sound similar to my goals! However, I'm currently sat here with a huge bar of chocolate! Good luck. We can do it!
My goal is to focus on one thing, care about it, stick around and make it count. I've got my thing, no for the sticking around part. Thx for the shout out Double D-more. You're a real gent. ^CR
WOW! This year is going to be incredible!
Can't wait for so much of that.
I absolutely HAVE to be earning at least a part-time income from working for myself (hopefully design work for bloggers) because I need to become independent, but also because I do not want to become one of those people who complains everyday about their job. That simply cannot be my future.
I hope you call us out on these in 12 months!
Thats great to hear! I might actually be looking to have a simple logo design done! add me on facebook Bardia Rezaei
Best of luck with 2013, earning a living from your passion is a great one! I know exactly what you mean about people who complain about their job, so negative when there is a whole world waiting to be explored!
Last year I had goals that were put on the back burner, because I fell ill and was diagnosed with Stage IV Neuroendocrine (NET)/Carcinoid Cancer.
My goal for 2013 is to ramp up and realize the dream I've had for many years–to publish a book and to make the rest of my "living" as an inspirational speaker. I'll start by committing to no less than a weekly blogpost on my blog, "Beyond Life's Challenges" (must learn more about how to use wordpress better).
Thank you for your encouragement and leadership, Scott.
Coral, live strong!
Thanks so much, Kaka XVII!! I plan on it!
Make big strides towards a trip to Antarctica in the next two years! This encompasses a lot of specific financial goals and self-discipline.
My last kids head off to college this fall. I'm hoping that by August I can figure out what something to do or be. I've been searching for years and have no clue.
So my big Must is to maybe find a big Must… /shrug
Kelly, I have been searching for years too. I am hoping that live your legend tools can assist me in that search!
My biggest goal is to grow my community of people thriving to make a drastic change in their life and be happier than they ever dreamt of! Thanks Scott for this inspiring post, as usually!
Keep it up with that goal! Goals like those are what inspire others to change, and become who they have dreamed of becoming!
Make a killer thesis
What's your topic?
I MUST leave my current job by the end of 2013. I don't know what I'll be doing instead, but I MUST be doing something different.
Best of luck Allison. I know leaving a job can be tough. I left my job two years ago and I've been living off passive income ever since then. It's tough but it's definitely possible. Do you have any ideas about what you want to do next? All the best!
Thanks! Well I only have a vague idea at this point of what I'd like to be doing. One thing I'm sure of though is that I want to always have multiple streams of income to rely on. I don't want to chain myself to one thing. I am still working through the specifics of what that will involve. What did you do to leave your job and create some passive income?
Hey Allison. Having multiple streams of income is definitely the right way to approach this. I started out by doing affiliate marketing and online lead generations. I also had a few offline projects as well that were joint venture.
The best way to do this is to simply start. There are a lot of resources out there that can help you (living your legend and smart passive income being a few of them). You will never know what to do until you actually start doing it.
Aim to get just $5/month. If you can get to that then you can get to $10/month, $100/month, $1000/month etc. But it starts with taking the first step. So don't delay. Best of luck!
I'm with you on this! I don't know what I will be doing either but I know I need a change. Let's take this year to figure it out and get it done. Best of luck to you!
Yeah this year has to be the one! No more 'I'll do it later" or "I'll apply for that position tomorrow". We can do this Katie!
yes friend, my goal also almost the same, anyway I made my mind to leave d current job this year. If not, then I am sure I cannot put any dent in this world. V MUST b doing something good & something different.
My "must" is similar to Allisons, but a bit simpler… I MUST find a job. I graduated from college 13 years ago and am still looking for full time work. I just need to find anything, whether it's something I'm passionate about (or even care about for more than a paycheck) is irrelevant at this point. I'm looking at being homeless within a month, so any full time job that can pay the bills is my must…
Been there, done that, couldn't afford the t-shirt. I've been laid off twice in the last four years. It's nearing time to take any old job just to avoid being unemployed, because unemployment makes it harder to get hired.
Same thing here, and also feeling lost about what I will do to make up that income plus more!
Yeah, its really hard to know where to start, but I'm learning that just beginning is best. Even is its not a sure bet for future income, it may lead you something that will be.
Goals for 2013 off the top of my head: complete LYL E-course! Stop working at the jobs that I am not passionate about, complete Crossfit Level 1 training, decide if I want/need to go to Grad school, work/trade for Crossfit membership, plan a trip, take time off, hold a free standing handstand for a minute. YAY 2013!
Just do it, Lara… after you pick your top five goals.
Yeay go Laura! Our 2013 goals are really similar!! I totally hear you!
Set the stage for an indefinite trip around the world in 2014. Hell yes
That sounds awesome Kevin! That's something I definitely want to do myself. I've always wondered what the specific cost of doing that would be. Somehow I think it's a lot more doable than when I imagine it in my head haha. Have you looked into how this could be feasible for you?
Definitely would be great adventure. Best of luck!
Hey! I had the same questions about an epic, round the world trip. There are several bloggers that have answered it! Here is one of my favorites: http://alittleadrift.com/2009/10/rtw-budget-travel-around-the-world/
Thanks Lauren!
Finish court reporting school and begin my internship.
Lead a team on a Habitat for Humanity build in Mongolia in July…..just need to find the team.
Power to us all as we achieve our goals.
And power to you Scott for getting us moving.
Fantastic goal, John!
Super goal, I am sure u wl achieve something big. Best wishes.
Have my freelance company become self sustained, This way I can work on personal videos, own a loft, and travel! (Oh, and to be able to pay my student loans) lol
Currently in the same boat as you, Tiffany. But definitely not study loans, instead I need to think about an action plan to make my idea come into reality.
Lower my BMI – ultimately to a healthy range.
Bring easy to implement, effective tips and tools based on neuro-psychology (sounds intimidating, actually really cool stuff) to the internet so thousands can improve their lives!
Looking forward to see those Practical tips, Dr.Carrie. After all I am a person that loves to learn more about the mind.
Finally find my passion and start a business with it.
You will definitely find it! So stay hungry and stay foolish, Ben.
Complete graduate school, receive my DDS, and find a job that allows my inner voice to be expressed, while providing the best possible care for my patients.
Form 15 friendships with peoples that's passionate and positive
I always wanted to form more ideal, real friendships with peoples since I do not have any friends, neither talk with peoples face to face. So this will be like , top priority of this year.
Earn $35,000
Well I am going to earn this amount from working at home. I do not know how I am going to achieve it, but I know that I will achieve it. Just in case, I am a web designer. But of course I am still walking on the road of improving my ability.
The reason I want to earn that amount of money is due that I want to help my mother get out of debt, and I want to start living with my own income, instead of living off parents income.
Be pure vegetarian
I am already a vegetarian, but sometimes I get off-track etc. Lets say occasionally bit then again, at the current present moment going full time vegetarian may not be the ideal choice, due of funds and such. And besides that I am merely a student.
Be more connected with my sub conscious
I have always wanted to know more about my mind. Because I have been researching on different topics related to mind such as, lucid dreaming, day dreaming, visualization etc.
Be more aware and conscious
Same principles from sub conscious mind.
Be compassionate
Another thing that I am going to do this year.I am kind of looking forward to the result of this one
Frequent Computer Breaks
Definitely need this one, hahaha.
Exercises 3-5 times a week
Again, definitely need this one as well. After all moving your body makes you feel more alive :D.
That's my intentions of this year, and I am going, I MEAN REALLY FOCUS on this intentions in this year. After all this is one of the most ambitious year for me, due that I went to many transitional events, kicked out old beliefs, learned more about myself (still am). SO yeah….to all of you reading this, life is a journey so don't settle for just one time, but rather adventure life to the fullest. Be like a kid that's exploring his backyard
It seems I double posted by accident, might as well try to delete this one since it's a guest post, hahaha! Wow, see what excitements do to peoples, haha.
I am here to share in the work leading to the achievement and promotion of the betterness goals most people really, really desire in the hearts and minds. These are the goals that are best achieved through principles of kindness, sharing and positive, ethical innovation that create real and very large alternatives to violence, inequity and that address complex macro issues like anthropogenic climate change.
I am that change because I am a betterness explorer, designer and cultivator.
Further, i support the goals of my community strategy:
"We the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America." – The Preamble to the US Constitution
A common defense can mean safety for more people. It does not require armaments to make us safer. Betterness means more engaged minds focused on civilization innovation.
When we meditate on such words of guidance and help from the generation ahead of us—and work at being part of the authorship of a better future at the same time—our reflections can then more readily visualize, articulate and deploy the betterness nuances that further perfect civilization. A more perfect civilization comes from capabilities and activities that add more harmony to our relationship with each other, nature and the faith of our choosing.
We have to be good enough.
We have to being willing to jump into the fray. We have to do it all again one more time.., even when it would be easier to do less, or the energy or the resources don't seem to be in front of us first.
I have to. I can.
Form 15 friendships with peoples that's passionate and positive
I always wanted to form more ideal, real friendships with peoples since I do not have any friends, neither talk with peoples face to face. So this will be like , top priority of this year. And this will let me step out of my comfort zone and start meeting new peoples.
Earn $35,000
Well I am going to earn this amount from working at home. I do not know how I am going to achieve it, but I know that I will achieve it. Just in case, I am a web designer. But of course I am still walking on the road of improving my ability.
The reason I want to earn that amount of money is due that I want to help my mother get out of debt, and I want to start living with my own income, instead of living off parents income.
Be pure vegetarian
I am already a vegetarian, but sometimes I get off-track etc. Lets say occasionally bit then again, at the current present moment going full time vegetarian may not be the ideal choice, due of funds and such. And besides that I am merely a student.
Be more connected with my sub conscious
I have always wanted to know more about my mind. Because I have been researching on different topics related to mind such as, lucid dreaming, day dreaming, visualization etc.
Be more aware and conscious
Same principles from sub conscious mind.
Be compassionate
Another thing that I am going to do this year.I am kind of looking forward to the result of this one
Frequent Computer Breaks
Definitely need this one, hahaha.
Exercises 3-5 times a week
Again, definitely need this one as well. After all moving your body makes you feel more alive :D.
That's my intentions of this year, and I am going, I MEAN REALLY FOCUS on this intentions in this year. After all this is one of the most ambitious year for me, due that I went to many transitional events, kicked out old beliefs, learned more about myself (still am). SO yeah….to all of you reading this, life is a journey so don't settle for just one time, but rather adventure life to the fullest. Be like a kid that's exploring his backyard
looks like we have the same top priority this year
wish you success with it!
Awesome! You too!
Shift from working for some large corporations dream, to creating and working for my own.
My 2013 goal is to connect with more people who are on the personal development journey. Like-minded people that I can have deep and inspiring conversations with, even if it is only over skype! Perhaps I need to move where the people are..
Hi Elise! What an awesome goal! I'm very much into personal development myself. You can add me on skype if you like: mich.monkey83 Would love to have deep and inspiring conversations with you
That's one awesome goal, Elise. Since me myself, needs to connect with passionate and positive peoples that's exploring their journey to happiness :D.
Same intention here
Go out and explore the place where you are, there are chances you find such a person nearby, too!
In 2013 I want to gain the tools, mentorship and
resources (financial and otherwise) needed to help me launch Feeding Forward into a successful and profitable company that will end both hunger and food waste in America (and eventually abroad as well). I am blessed to have already found what I love and am passionate about — my hope is that it will enable me to make the largest social impact possible and rally others to the cause as well.
Nice one, there are opportunities to be able to make a good business that supports yourself, gives help, and cuts waste. All the best.
I want to figure out where in Canada I want to live, finally – to settle there. I also want to recognize my greatest work-passion – to be really clear about it and to pursue that single mindedly towards making a good living from that passion. I want to think bigger and I would like to help others more – quietly, though. I want to live off-grid – likely in an 'Earthship.' Having said all this, I believe that we have destinies here on planet earth that are unfolding as we speak, and we just need to relax into 'what is', trusting that things are already working out and that we are learning what we need to despite the messy-looking lives that most of us have, and inwardly (or outwardly) complain about, holding out for something that looks more pulled together even while we are living it.
Awesome! Hubby and I are looking to help on an Earthship community in the Ogden, UT area. The leader is still working on permits, which are a bear.
That's great that you are getting into Earthships. I see that as so the way to go. Yes, the permits and codes can be the main issues. Good luck with that.
I must lose 20 more lbs (even though I already lost 150+) so I can become the best runner I can be.
Keep going! You're nearly there!
Thanks Michelle!
my goal is to learn how to learn
(learning the best technique for learning, reading,note taking, memorize, organisation, time managment).
I think it's the best investment that I can make for the future
To earn money from my new business from a TOTAL STRANGER by my birthday July 25th…
Hey Scott if you are wanting to learn how to surf, consider joining us on the Under30CEO Microfinance Surfcamp to Nicaragua!
So inspired by everyone else's fabulous goals. For me the main goal this year (which I am already doing) is to adopt a completely gluten-free, dairy-free and egg-free diet as I have just been diagnosed with Hashimoto's Disease, and my doctor has advised that this diet will reverse all my symptoms. Have started already and am experiencing so many benefits already: more energy, clearer skin, losing weight and feeling healthier. Think 2013 is going to be a great year!
All the best for your health, Michelle! With the diet change, it may become very difficult at times, keep your reason in mind and go forward!
And try to stick only to this change until it settles (one habit at a time! @ZenHabits)
My goals are:
1. to find my passion – the work i love doing and create a strategy to start earning money from it.
2. to start exercising on a regular basis
Finish a marathon. I'm gonna prove to myself this year that I can do what I set my mind to.
You can do that man. Train the mind and the body will follow. Get a plan, follow it, believe in it and it will happen.
Create an email newsletter for affiliate marketers advertising software and tools that they can actually use.
Do 100 "Hopes & Dreams in 2013!" homeshows for my Premier Designs jewelry business–by doing so I will find out 1,000 dreams of women all over SoCal and be able to support these dreams through my life coaching.
Scott, I LOVE your #9 idea. Go for it!
I will be generating revenue from a new business offering support to single women over 40 in living happily ever after.
Wow. That was powerful.
Figure out what it is that I really want to do with my life and start on the path to get there!
Dream without any limits, write down all your wishes for the future! Then you may probably see a trend there. Or at one moment you will just stumble upon one thing and feel that it is really yours.
Grow my career coaching business by focusing on serving others.
Be genuine, vulnerable, and authentic. Don't wory about being perfect…be real.
I love everything about being an entrepreneur and creating my own income. My goal for 2013 is to increase my business in all facets so that I am helping to improve many other lives in addition to my own.
To lose 20 pounds by the end of the year so I can be at my ideal weight of 200 pounds by the end of 2013 and keep it off with excercise and a change to the foods I eat (processed foods, be gone)!
Quit my current job for rather than just quitting, doing something with real and meaningful purposes, feeling great, proud and useful about it! "Take bigger risks"
Wow, everyone is so inspiring! I'm new to the program so my goals are to sift out my passion(s) from the huge list of interests I have and throw myself 100% into it. I want to quit my job by the end of the year.
My goals for 2013 are to make time to actually think about what I am passionate about for I am interested in a lot of things but I do not know what I really wanted to do and finish the LYL E-course!
I fired my boss and it feels great! My dreams are bigger than my fears and I am ready to do something bigger in life.. I believe to have found my way. I will keep you posted and would love to share this opportunity with others.
To quit my dayjob (I've already done that, tomorrow is my last day!) and to then really persue my goal of becoming a (payed) actress/filmmaker.
Be the change I want to see in this world. Starting with Project Experiences not Gifts..
Thats an awesome idea, do you have a link or website where you have ideas or previous experiences?
Thanks Ryan ! Not yet but hopefully I'll get something up and running soon
Contribute financially to my family so that my wife can quit her job and live her legend.
My main Must is to inform, encourage and to live and lead by example for my family, friends, community and country. In ways we can live a more sustainable lifestyle, promote and create renewable energy sources, use the resources around us, try and influence profit driven companies to have a more community approach, get the government behind community projects, and drive out poverty in my country New Zealand.
I will do this by living what I say, continued education, being an active voice and presence in my community and like minded groups/organisations, nagging officials and politicians, empowering and educating the youth on all their options on the way they can influence and live.
I didn't use to think it is possible to really make a difference, but that has all changed. I feel with passion you your self change and therefore anything is possible.
I am no corporate worker but believe that multi national companies have a place in our world creating opportunities for plenty, I believe their greed has no place. I am no hippie spiritualist either but believe society needs to break down barriers and be at least accommodating of everyone who means well, extend a hand and look after mother earth. Although I admire them both.
I am your run of the mill wage earning citizen, who believes that everyone can prosper by looking at our different societies, cultures, religions etc, and negotiating which are the lesser evils that can be tolerated and mitigated, and then taking the best qualities, ideals, ways of living and focusing on these.
I have my thoughts, opinions and beliefs that have stirred my passion, created a mission and proposed a challenge.
I am not 100% clear on how to do this, but that adds to the excitement.
2013 is here and so am I.
Ryan, thank you for sharing. I'm inspired by your words, and will incorporate some of them into my own goals for 2013. I think it is absolutely true that you can change the world just by doing what you're doing now, but in a way that you live authentically and lead by example by never compromising your values and encouraging others to do the same.
Inspiring Ryan ! I too believe in being the change we want to see in this world. If we can reach even one person then we have made a difference. Goodluck with all your plans…
This year I want to find friends. This is the one thing I can't not do any longer. I want to connect in person with like-minded, inspiring people. Also, find people who can be my mentors and people who I can help with my skills and knowledge.
I go to WDS2013 from Europe, to meet all these wonderful people. Bought my ticket in October And since I am going to the US, I also want to fulfill my long-time, almost irrational dream of visiting San-Francisco. Feel myself terribly insecure whether I will have enough money for the trip, how to navigate in the US, where to stay…
Anybody going from WDS to San-Francisco who can give me a lift?
Start a business (I've just left my job after 7 fairly uninspiring years). Travel and volunteer in Africa (using my coaching skills). De-clutter my life (across a number of areas!). Be kind.
I love the last statement. I think kindness is life changing (both for the giver and the receiver of the act). All the best!
Scott, thank you for this avenue.
I live in the Philippines and over the past few years, I've received multiple text messages from people asking me if I knew someone who was willing to donate blood. Dengue fever is the most usual cause of this need. And this illness causes the platelet count of the afflicted to plummet, thus causing haemorrhage. The person would need to be intravenously hydrated and in worst case scenarios, given fresh blood.
I intend to make a database or repository of information of people who are willing to donate blood when necessary. It should include details like blood type, location, age, etc. I'm not sure how to go about it yet.
Any suggestions? Maybe we could do this worldwide. I'm sure there are others in different countries and continents who have the same challenge.
Talk with her. It may not seem like a big goal to you, but it is for me.
God are you in luck on personal goal #3… Before heading out on your surf trip to Jaws or Teahupo'o, make sure you spend some time at Uncle Shooter's Surf Camp in Santa Monica. Free lodging, board rental, and waves!
I hear that's a damn good camp!
Land a resident DJ gig
Fix writing. We can find a better, faster way to writing careers than toiling over countless unread drafts!
1. Apply for jobs in Latin America this fall and ship off in 2014.
2. Do a front and middle splits!
-To get a new job that matters to me as well as to the world at the end or middle of this year & also to get expertise in Violin that I am practicing now by hard work- it's my main Goals of 2013 that I MUST do, and I can surely achieve more and something big in the coming year since it will motivate me to pursue and do more.
Start a side gig (which will develop into something bigger) teaching a 6-week fitness course designed, not to put people through workouts and keep them as clients who are dependent on me, but to give people the knowledge and tools to independently take their fitness into their own hands.
Great video. Thanks for the insight.
To change my life and the lives of others by educating myself in integrative nutrition and the mind-body -soul approach to overal lhealth and wellness and to share that passion so that others will experience increased health and overall well being.
- Share my personal weight loss story of a total of 142 pounds and begin educating those around me on the importance of balanced living, healthy eating, great exercise habits and daily gratitude and affirmation.
- Connect/collaborate with upcoming influencers and designers on key projects
- Do at least 15 photoshoots by year end.
I must be creative. Beyond that I'm a bit lost. Currently I paint and draw as a hobby, it would be nice to make art my livelihood but I have a hard time seeing how that's possible. I have much to do to develope my artistic skills anyway. However I've learned that to be successful in the business of art it's almost more important that you be good at marketing yourself than be able to create good art. I don't have much stomach for marketing.
One thing I wonder about is in Scott's blog posts the idea that you need to find a way to help people is the way to find what you "must" do. I'm not much of a people person so I'm not sure I fit in with this concept. I really just want to become self employed, (preferably as an artist). The company I work for does good things for humanity but it is a coorporation with your typical coorporate BS and I've been there for 20+ years and am just burnt out. Not sure what to do about it though.
Speaking of TED talks, I just watched Simon Sinek's TED talk about leadership and the concept of the Golden Circle. Now, I want to identify my Why and build outward from there.
A 'MUST' for 2013,
1. Read through the 'Live your Legend' newsletters more often, thoroughly and REFLECT.
2. MUST find funding for my PhD studies.
Stop looking at the 'if' and 'but'. Embrace the opportunity. Stay fearless.
3. Travel through Tamil Nadu and Kerala to meet people with similar career and life interests as me.
4. Keep a journal of all the upcoming adventures in the year.
Hey LYL-ers! Read some of the comments below and they are simply amazing!! (Candice, Karen H, Kevin Miller, Allison, Erin Waterman..just to name a few) So glad to know that there are many people out there with passions and are pursuing them! You are I.N.S.P.I.R.I.N.G.! Hats off to you guys!
Now I find that the biggest thing holding a person back is our selves. That keeps us from achieving the impossible and keeping us in mediocrity. Each one of us are extraordinary beyond measure but due to fear/worries of all sorts we dare not take that step. That first step. So, for accountability purposes I'm putting my MUST goals for the year here. For 2013 I'm going to conquer my self and live my life.
Being a full-time student I've always restricted myself to not "go out there and do things" (due to meeting deadlines, preparation for upcoming exams, funds etc) Any reason under the sun has kept me from DOING things so I've really missed out on what life has to offer. But no more, every week I'm going to do one thing I wouldn't normally do.
It can be something as simple as catching up with random people more than just once a week (to build more meaningful relationships) to going on a random backpacking trip to discover Europe. Anything that keeps my life colourful and moving to inspire others to live their lives on a daily basis!
Starting a creative collective to help social causes engage people in brilliant new ways!
My most important goal is to find and choose a career path that I am passionate about and to dedicate my time and energy to gain the required social, technical skills to be one of the best at it
I want to change this world we live in, and make a legitimate healthcare system not a "sickcare" system!
Work for a world-class institution dedicated to saving wildlife and the environment.
To complete my research on "how to reduce the road accident deaths in India". More than 1 lac people are dying in India because of road accidents as per various studies, so I strongly believe that it's necessary to do something in this regard.
Running the Tough Mudder to raise money for the A21 campaign. Oh yeah, and I am not a runner or an athlete…yet.
Biggest goal: Launch my coaching business and change people's lives so I can make enough money to support myself and my brother with it.
I am a bit late to this game but I wanted to contribute to my local community in a way that I can leave my job eventually and focus on this full time. To do this I determined that I will offer services around social media, web presence, and internet marketing for small local businesses. I launched my website, established the LLC, and now I am moving toward getting my first customer which were parts of my LYL Goal Setting and Action Workbook. My goal is to generate enough revenue this year, through this business, to pay for my VA.
Oh I forgot to add the meaning behind what I am doing for local businesses. I want to bring back that personal connection that local businesses used to have with their customers and show them that this is the way to compete with the major players. It is sad to see so many local business closing daily and owners losing that dream they worked so hard to live. I know this because my father was one of them.
Pay down debt and simplify my life so my husband and I can each spend no more than 1,000 hours per year working for money.
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Dear friends:
One of the hints Jesus gave us concerning the signs of His return is that it will be "as in the days of Lot" (Luke 17:28).
Lot lived in Sodom, at the time of Abraham, some 4,000 years ago. What was it like in Sodom in the days of Lot? Ezekiel tells us that the people there had "pride, fullness of food, and abundance of idleness" (Ezekiel 16:49). But the most well-known condition was that sexual immorality was rampant. Does that sound like now?
It is just like that today, but more than I ever realized. I am not talking about just homosexuality and San Francisco, although that is bad enough.
For years, I have known that sexual morality in the world and in the U.S. had plummeted, but I never dreamed how much until it was recently pointed out to me that a new, widespread phenomenon is that large crowds of girls -- I said girls -- are having wild sex parties, with many in attendance. It must be bachelorette parties, sorority parties, or something similar.
I can hardly believe that dozens of young, attractive, wholesome-looking girls gather at these parties with male strippers, having all manner of sex with them right there in public in front of everyone, with everyone screaming and clapping with delight! As the music plays, the naked, handsome young guys roam throughout the room, going from girl to girl, with the girls eagerly waiting their turn to have sex with them. It is like a Roman orgy. I have not exactly led a sheltered life and am not a prude, but this is shocking to me beyond imagination.
Generally, females are supposed to be the guardians of a culture's morality, so this trend seems to be a paradigm shift, and is ominous.
You wonder if any of the girls are married. No doubt some are. What do their husbands think? Do they know where they are? Or are these all singles? If married. are they this hot at home, or is it just because they are away from home and at the parties, where they think they are free to have sex with different men?
I am not including a link because you don't want to know. You don't want those images planted in your mind. I have had to plead the blood of Jesus over my own mind, to cleanse it.
Because of all this and more, will the fire of Sodom soon fall upon the world? Many believe so.
I think about those surprised citizens of Sodom who were killed when the sudden destruction of God's fiery judgment came upon them, and in seconds they were dead, cast out into eternity, forever, without God.
Lot and Sodom were in the Old Testament. But the New Testament describes a similar event connected with the end of the age: "When they say, 'peace and safety!' then sudden destruction comes upon them... and they shall not escape" (1 Thessalonians 5:3).
God sent angels to provide an escape for Lot and His family just before the destruction came. I believe that represents the rapture, which will also deliver God's chosen ones before the coming sudden destruction, which some believe will be a simultaneous event.
I believe this is described in the Old Testament way back in Isaiah 26:
Many scholars believe we are very near this event.
- Awake and sing, you who dwell in dust; For your dew is like the dew of herbs,
- And the earth shall cast out the dead. (Resurrection.)
- Come, my people, enter your chambers, And shut your doors behind you;
- Hide yourself, as it were, for a little moment, Until the indignation is past.
- For behold, the Lord comes out of His place To punish the inhabitants of the earth for their iniquity;
- (vs. 19-21).


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Season's Greetings! We've put together a little Holiday Mix featuring new recordings from Blue-Eyed Son, Goldenboy, Old Monk, From Bubblegum To Sky, and Twisty (Tsugumi of Old Monk). It's a free download on soundcloud or bandcamp.
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Upcoming shows
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With the buzz of traffic and honking horns just a mere 40 feet away, students fly through the air testing their acrobatic moves.
For Kristen Tsaklis, leaping off a board 30 feet up in the air, was also a way to face a life-long fear. She is afraid of heights.
"I dont know why people do this stuff," Tsaklis, 26, said right after taking "a hop" off the plywood board and swinging into the world of trapeze. "I kind of wanted to overcome the fear but its still terrifying."
The leap was part of training classes offered by The Flying Trapeze School operated out of Bayfront Park. The school, which began operating six years ago, is owned by professional flying trapeze artists. The school began when Timothy Schmand, Bayfront Park's executive director, approached the trapeze artists and asked if they would be interested in starting a school right in the center of the park.
Instructors say their main goal is to spread their love for the art of flying in a safe environment.
"I like seeing people for the first time the best,'' said Cindy Scanlon, one of the trapeze instructors. "You get to see them go through everything -- their excitement, their fear. The instruction is so much more detailed here. Its just been my best flying experience."
Trapeze is a circus art that was invented by Jules Leotard in 1859. He created a bar above his father's swimming pool in Toulouse, France and trapeze is now a renowned circus art performed all over the world by famous traveling circuses like Cirque du Soleil and the Ringling Bros.
The school offers classes for all ages and is open for parties, office and family functions. Students learn how to hang from their legs, tumble off the bar and trust the idea of being caught by a "catcher."
"It's a super experience," said catching instructor Lockwood Pirie.
To learn more about the school and the classes offered visit www.theflyingtrapeze.net


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From Paula's Home Cooking/Paula's Party
5 stars based on 220 Reviews
Servings: 6 to 8 servings
Prep Time: 30 minutes
Cook Time: 40 minutes
Difficulty: Easy
1 18 1/4-ounce package yellow cake mix
1 egg
8 tablespoons butter, melted
1 15-ounce can of pumpkin
1 8-ounce package cream cheese, softened
3 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
8 tablespoons butter, melted
1 16-ounce box powdered sugar
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon nutmeg
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
To make the cake, combine all of the ingredients and mix well. Pat the mixture into a lightly greased 13x9-inch baking pan.
Prepare filling:
In a large bowl, beat the cream cheese and pumpkin until smooth. Add the eggs, vanilla, and butter and beat together.
Next, add the powdered sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and mix well.
Spread pumpkin mixture over cake batter and bake for 40 to 50 minutes. Make sure not to over bake as the center should be a little gooey.
Serve with fresh whipped cream.


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Peach Ice Cream
From EatingWell: July/August 1994
If you plan to serve this ice cream directly from the ice cream maker, add an extra cup of chopped peaches to the mix just before stir-freezing. A crisp almond-flavored cookie served alongside would complement the subtle hint of almond in the ice cream
Makes: 6 servings, 3/4 cups each
Active Time:
Total Time:
Nutrition Profile
Low calorie | Low cholesterol | Low saturated fat | Low sodium | Heart healthy | Healthy weight | Gluten free |View Our Nutrition Guidelines »
- 3 cups sliced peeled peaches, (6-8 medium peaches)
- 2 tablespoons lemon juice
- 1 1/2 cups Marshmallow Fluff
- 1 cup low-fat milk
- 2 teaspoons amaretto, or 1/2 teaspoon almond extract
- Puree peaches with lemon juice in a food processor. Transfer to a bowl. Add Marshmallow Fluff and mix with a whisk until as smooth as possible. (The mixture will be a little lumpy; lumps will break down during stir-freezing.) Add milk and amaretto or almond extract and mix well. If necessary, chill until cold.
- Pour into the canister of an ice cream maker and freeze according to the manufacturer's instructions.
Per serving: 235 calories; 1 g fat (0 g sat, 0 g mono); 2 mg cholesterol; 55 g carbohydrates; 3 g protein; 1 g fiber; 63 mg sodium; 232 mg potassium.
Carbohydrate Servings: 3 1/2
Exchanges: 1/2 fruit, 3 other carbohydrate
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Recipe Categories
- Health & Diet Considerations
- Low cholesterol
- Low saturated fat
- Low sodium
- Heart healthy
- Healthy weight
- Gluten free
- Low calorie
- Servings
- 6
- Preparation/ Technique
- Freeze
- Ice Cream Maker
- Season
- Summer
- Holiday
- Father's Day
- July 4th
- Labor Day
- Style/Theme
- Birthday
- Entertaining, casual
- Kid-friendly
- Type of Dish
- Desserts, frozen
- Desserts, fruit
- Ethnic/Regional
- American
- Ease of Preparation
- Easy
- Total Time
- 1 hour or less
- Publication
- July/August 1994