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Do You Live In A Grownup House?
When you're a kid, you believe that life happens with a certain rhythm. Everyone loses their teeth at around the same time. There are milestones, like applying for college or going to the prom, that are shared with your peers. But then, paths diverge. This was brought home to me recently when I took care of a friend's children.
She's married and she has two children, two milestones I haven't yet encountered, which may be the reason that her home feels very grownup. The longer I was there, the more I felt curious to understand what made her home feel so grownup, so finished.
There's the largesse of it — not just that it's a generously sized home but that there is plenty of everything: While I don't advocate clutter or buying to please others, there is a feeling of abundance in having enough of everything — sheets, towels, dishes, throws, food in the pantry. There's a feeling of safety and comfort in knowing that you can weather a weekend or two without laundry or a few nights without doing the dishes and not worry about running out of things. Is your pantry well-stocked, are you able to come home from being away for a few days, skip the trip to the grocery store, and still be able to make a nice meal? What if you got sick? Ask yourself, do I have enough to take care of myself well?
The furniture, much of which has been inherited, is antique and well-made, she has good dishes and nice glasses: There's a point when Ikea is a great resource...and there's a point in your life when it's time to step it up, invest in yourself and buy a couch you don't put together yourself. It takes a while to know when that is, to know when you've settled into yourself and you can look down the road of your life and see some consistency. For most of us, that comes when we marry, or have children, but it can also happen when you finally settle into a career that excites you and that you're committed to for the long haul. Has that shift happened? And, if so, is that life reflected in your home and how you treat yourself? I'm not suggesting you spend money frivolously, but if you love beautiful things, start collecting them (and using them), incorporating them into your life, finding pleasure in their solidity, in using them to create traditions. Ask yourself, what are the things in my home that make me happy?
Things work: If something breaks, it's fixed. There are extra batteries, a full set of screwdrivers, a drill, light bulbs. When the plumbing gets clogged, when a room needs painting, when a chair needs reupholstering or a picture needs hanging, it gets taken care of quickly by people who are trustworthy and good at their job. Ask yourself: Do I have people — whether that's a maid, a handyman, a house or pet sitter or an upholsterer — I can rely on to help me get things done around the house?
There is evidence of life: Photographs, toys, mementos in the bathroom, lopsided clay figures, invitations, birthday cards, a piano — whatever your pleasures in life, let your home reflect them. These are the things in tell the story of your life, where it's been, where it's going. Ask yourself, what would someone say about me if they came into my house without knowing me?
It is comfortable and welcoming: Things are beautiful, yes, but not too precious (a good thing in my friend's house where there are often four or five kids running around). It's easy to pull up a chair. The coffee table's within easy reach. The house looks nice even when things are out of place. It's a house that works for everyday and for guests. Ask yourself, do I feel comfortable having people over, or do I feel like I have to hover over them because my house isn't quite there yet?
94 Comments
I promised myself I would never get that boring. Doesn't matter how old you are (I am 40yo) you should always surround yourself with things that are fun!
I'm currently reading Meghan Daum's "Life Would Be Perfect If I Lived in That House" and it reminds me of this post. The writer sees apartments and houses as ways to mark rites of passage which is how I see living spaces, too.
nice post
This is something I'm still struggling to do--I'm still young but really yearn for an "adult" home. Well-furnished and cohesive, matching linens, dishes, full set of wine glasses, etc. When does this point come for others?
Nice post and beautifully done. I have thought of this for years. Once, when i was about 32 years old...i had a big party. some of the young workers came through and said your home is so grownup. It was such a compliment. When i was in my twenties, i hung out with a crew of friends who loved furniture and they all bought homes by the time they were 28. they spent weekends collecting great, grown up furniture. i bought a condo when i was 38 years old. But i had collected nice furniture and bought other pieces that have lasted the test of time. I still go to ikea but my couches, and beds and chairs and tables are from places like DWR and Room and Board or antiques or vintage...strong and grownup. It feels wonderful to l ive in a grownup house. i advise everyone to try it.
Boring and grown up are not synonymous. You can be tons of fun and exude class and maturity.
I think something happens to a lot of people when they have kids. Their mindsets go from in the now to 18 years from now. Life changes speed and direction. They want to appear in control (though any parent will tell you it's a thin facade) so their kids respect them. They want to set good living examples for them. The outward appearance of our homes reflect who we want to be and who we want our kids to be.
I'm married with a kid and our house isn't grown up AT ALL. I'd like for it to be moreso and we're inching that way very slowly. Doesn't mean everything has to be $$$ (we have a couple of IKEA pieces I love), but just more cohesive/intentional, I think.
Elements I consider essential to a "grownup" looking home: tidiness (to a degree), and art. I agree with Dovieann - boring does not have to be a part of it.
I think we have a "grown up" house in that we can clean up all the toys and you wouldn't know a kid lives here. No doll house in the dining room, no colorful buckets of legos in the living room. Even my little guy's room has an adult sense of style. I'm not sure how long this can last, but we're almost at year two. Before baby we had white silk sofas and antique furniture. Once he was moving at all we had to get a leather sofa and some more sturdy furniture. I agree - your house doesn't have to be boring to be "grown up."
I don't think getting married and having kids is a requirement of having a grown up house, but I have to say that getting married helped because there were two of us to push each other to make tougher decisions (spending more money on a better sofa, for instance). Where some of my friends and I diverge is that their grown up house is designed to be functionally grown up and aesthetically grown up, whereas all my appliances work, I have a full pantry and other hallmarks of a grown up house but I've kept my collection of funny mugs and science fiction collectibles.
This seems a bit off to me. Having a 'grown up' home isn't about having matching linens and a full pantry in case you get sick. Surely it's about having respect for your environment and the people you share it with, knowing what it is you need and being comfortable enough in yourself to have these things and look after them because they mean something to you and not to the woman down the street who thinks she's in a homeless shelter if the glasses don't match. What about people who have better things to do? Are they less grown up somehow?
Back to say, I think all those things of excess come when you have money - not maturity. Yes, I feel like a grown up now that I have an extra set of sheets for guests and a drawer full of batteries - but that has only come because I got married and now have a double income. I knew I needed those things but they weren't priorities when I was trying to make it on my own.
My husband and I are in our late 20s, and we're proud of our "grown up" home. We lived in a total wreck during college and now we're incredibly grateful to own a fully furnished home with high quality furniture. Right now we're redoing the kitchen.
Also, having a big wedding helps immensely. I wouldn't exactly go out and buy 10 place settings of fine china or a full set of crystal bar ware on a whim, but that tends to be the kinds of things you receive as wedding gifts. It's nice to be able to host more formal entertaining from time to time, compared to our BYOB and red cup college days.
This article reaks of "Lifescript" and consumerism to me. I'm sure there are folks (I can't be the only one) who don't want a space larger than we need because we want to be out experiencing life, not making a pretty house with dozens of towels, kitchen gadgets, accoutrement used once a year, or an abundance of throw cushions (or throws). Whatever space you have and by whatever circumstances brought you there, take pride in it, take care of it, and be a kind person. Do the best with what you have and don't be defined by your address or the contents of what's inside. I guess this article rubbed me the wrong way today, sorry.
I do understand that being grown-up shouldn't mean having tons of things, but I also empathize with this post. I would call it less 'grown-up' and more 'domesticated.' Some people value homemaking than others and are more willing to invest time and money in the venture. I aspire to be domesticated myself, although I still don't know how to make everything in my house work right. I'm also not 100% agreed that having all these things indicates you aspire to or belong to a wealthier class. My parents collect pantry items and hold onto extra sheets and towels until they're irretrievably holey precisely for security, precisely because they know what it's like to do without them. Nothing is fancy, and trust me, almost nobody values interior decor less than them, but they have lots of the things they need because they want to be secure and provide for their family.
My partner and I bought a house a month ago. We'd lived together for the last year and a half in an 800 sq ft one-bedroom, one bath. We bought a much larger house (3BR, 1BA) on a double lot with a basement and a greenhouse. It's wonderful. When we had our housewarming party everyone asked where the furniture came from our old place. We'd tucked furniture into the garage and lived in our small space with our curated items; the art I inherited, a 50s table we'd found, the credenza I searched forever for on CL . Moreover, my own art has a place throughout the house. Now, the two of us feel like our home is the size we need for guests and family, we have the furniture and artwork to make it feel cozy and we're so damn happy. So, yes, we live in a grown up house. Shoes come off when you enter, there's food and snacks whenever anyone visits and since we live 'downtown' in our small town, we often have visitors. Again, I am so happy to have created a home for us to share with friends and family.
Are people reading a different post than me?
@artjunk and @ruthtooth, I don't seem to be reading what you're reading.
When the writer talks about having a full pantry and a home that has plenty of everything, she isn't talking about being wealthy enough to do it. She's talking about being self-sufficient. Part of being an adult is being able to take care of yourself and others at anytime you need to. There's always a variety of medication in my medicine cabinet, lots of shelf-stable food in the pantry and clean sheets and towels. That's just called being an adult.
And when she's talking about people who can help you get things done around the house, she's still not talking about wealth. When your dishwasher breaks, don't you call someone to fix it? When your water heater fails, don't you have it replaced? Part of being an adult is knowing who to call to fix these issues. Or even for smaller things, like carpet cleaning. I didn't see it as being a judgment on wealth, only that being an adult means you get things fixed instead of just making do.
@Teakfreak - I don't get what you mean either. No one said anyone had to buy a large house or spend lots of money on "making a pretty house" or... are you casting assumptions on something that didn't say any of those things? We're all "experiencing life"...but I didn't see anything about this post that was unreasonable.
To me a grown-up house is a house that is intentional, well-maintained, and welcoming. Whatever your style is really doesn't matter. And it certainly doesn't have to be boring!
The picture in the post above just seems cold and sterile to me. I think the style reminds me of my friend's parents' house, when we were kids. The two least affectionate people I've ever met. All the matchy-matchiness and perfectly clean in that house still makes me a little bit sad. No kids' artwork on display, not a toy box in sight. My mom had us keep a very clean house, but we could make messes and play with everything. I'd rather have cozy than formal!
Oh how well I know the feeling you describe above of visiting a friends grown up home, those visits always have a way of making my very nice single girl abode seem a little less glam! However you are most right with your suggestion to start collecting and acquiring nicer things even if it is just you living in your home. There is just something that feels so right when you trade up for the finer things in life or in your home decor! Great Post! http://vintagevixenlgs.tumblr.com/
While the post seems well-intentioned and I understand the point the author is trying to get across (a grown-up house should be thoughtful, functional, and should show evidence of excellent care from the homeowner) I don't think the examples they give are the best ones.
"There's a point when Ikea is a great resource...and there's a point in your life when it's time to step it up, invest in yourself and buy a couch you don't put together yourself." I disagree. The author may see the purchase of expensive furniture as a step of growing up, but it's not necessary to contribute to a grown-up house.
"Do I have people — whether that's a maid, a handyman, a house or pet sitter or an upholsterer — I can rely on to help me get things done around the house?" Here's a grown-up tip I've learned - learn how to do 95% of all household repairs yourself, then call the experts. Outsourcing is a massive waste of money, and isn't necessarily a maturity thing (it's an excess of money, one very few people can truly afford)
@robotropolis I agree, for the most part. I think it's funny that some people go to extreme lengths to separate "homemaking" and just "living." For me, having extra sheets and working batteries is just taking care of yourself. It's just ...getting your act together and being competent all around, not just work or home. I'm good at my job, so why shouldn't I also be good at taking care of my own house? Once upon a time, i didn't know how..then I got into a committed relationship and it dawned on me that I was responsible for caring for others. That kind of lightbulb moment really makes you want to quit dawdling and learn how to improve both of your lives.
really thought-provoking article! enjoyed very much...
I agree that people are reading things into this post that are not there. Having extra sheets and batteries is not about lots of money- the extra sheets in my grown-up house come from IKEA. The point it I have them, they are clean, and I know where they are should a guest spend the night. These are things I did not think about in an apartment in my early 20s.
A "Grown Up" livingspace is the difference between camping out in a space and actually "living" in it. It means you furnish a space with the intention of staying there for years, even if you intend to move. "Grown Up" doesn't require perfect sets of everything, however, you avoid trendy items likely to go out of style, in favor of acquiring items which are meant to last and perhaps handed down.
@Pi right on! You expressed my thoughts better than I could. I don't think this post has anything to do with wealth per se, but rather self-sufficiency, and dare I say it... maturity. A coworker of mine has a charming home that is always clean and welcoming. I know her income is not great, but she wears & uses quality vintage & second hand and practices excellent home economy. For me, it's about having clean towels ready for guests, and a stocked pantry during the blizzard. And having the name of a great upholsterer makes me LESS consumerist. Rather than buying cheap sofas from IKEA every few years, I would rather invest in refurbishing the sturdy one I found at an estate sale for $65. It's also about taking care of your things and respecting what you have.
I think the post is right on target. Can't see how people see consumerism in this essay. All the things the post mentions --- having enough sheets, batteries, lights and food ... those things do not have to be super expensive. it's just being cognizant, thinking ahead... acting like a grownup. Ridding yourself of silly things that used to be cute when you were 18 years or thinking of things your parents thought about when you were 18. And believe me having a grownup house doesn't have to feel boring. I've done the opposite and it didn't feel so great after I turned 27. I used to look at my older friends homes - organized, beautiful, homey and say ' this is how i should live.' Though, I once knew a friend,she was in her fifties. And she had this weird collection of trinket dollish doo dads in her home. I was much younger and at first i felt like she didn't want to grow up. Why would she have this in her home? And there were issues. But her New York City apartment was organized, stylish...sans the dollish trinkets. There were books, Glassware...inexpensive frames and art she bought from the street vendors. There were inexpensive dishes for keys, a door mat, enough towels, cold water waiting in the frig, a good coffee maker and she had even took time to hide wires. It felt comfortable and grownup...funky and kind of cool (again sans the dollish trinkets) and I took something from that.
Different things are important to different people - I don't think it's necessarily a matter of getting married or having kids. I am a homebody, and having a "grown up house" was always important to me - I hated living in tiny apartments, sharing walls, not having a place that was "mine," not having space for guests, etc. The second I graduated from school and got a good job I bought my first house and started getting rid of my futons and IKEA pieces and started collecting things that I really loved. Ever since, I've probably had the most "grown up" house of any of my friends - I bought my current home about two years ago and am still in the process of decorating and remodeling it - and it's definitely not boring! I have done everything I can to make it a comfortable and friendly place for friends and family to come visit or stay...I have real dishes and glasses for parties, a guest room with a nice mattress and sheets, and I have a go-to handyman, plumber, electrician, contractor, etc. to keep things running smoothly. And I'm the one who's handing down furniture to some of my married-with-kids friends.
On the flip side, I have a friend who lived in a $1 million house for about 8 years, and never even furnished about half of the rooms. She lined up pictures to be hung when she moved in and unpacked, and they were still leaning against the wall and waiting to be packed up again when she moved out. She would stick an aerobed in an empty room when someone came to stay. So I don't think it's a matter of money - she could easily have afforded to pay someone to hang pictures, decorate, etc., but it just wasn't a priority for her.
Great post!
I'm pretty sure our house is now an adult home. We don't have kids, but our house looks like grown-ups live there. Fun grown-ups, with lots of hobbies and good senses of humor, but grown-ups nonetheless.
For me, the best part about living in a grown-up house is that we can accommodate guests more easily when they come to town. No more scrambling for sheets, pillows, and towels. We're lucky enough to have a spare bedroom with a bed for guests to use. There are things to eat and drink in the kitchen (and in the fully-stocked bar!). Having people stay when you're prepared for it lessens the stress of houseguests so much!
I'm looking at this from a "mature" viewpoint, as someone who has had several "grown-up houses." For many people -- especially in these uncertain economic times -- your "stuff" can really weigh you down. I recently had to relocate for a job...in a more expensive area where I have considerably less living space. I consider myself fortunate that my older son and his fiancee were thrilled to move into my "grown-up" house with my "grown-up" possessions, and I was pretty much free to go. I now live with a lot of IKEA, my books, my ginormous collection of old costume jewelry, the rosewood dining table that was my first "grown-up" piece of furniture, and my mother's dining room chairs. It's a "grown-up" rented condo...because a grown-up lives there.
i think i will have an adult home if i can manage to keep at least one bottle of wine in the wine rack before it disappears. if i bought enough to stock, i would drink enough to stock...
According to this list, I've lived in a grown-up house for a long time, probably in part because I lived in a very unstable set of situations as a kid. Once I was on my own, I wanted the stability of decent stuff and enough of things like linens and such to get through tough times. Even though my husband and I have moved a fair amount over the 30+ years we've been together (including 6 cross-country moves), we've always made our spaces, temporary or otherwise, feel like homes, including stuff on the walls, cats in the house, etc. We are both total homebodies and always have been.
Regarding consumerism... to me, part of transitioning to a grown-up house is getting rid of all the random cheap crap - whether it's badly-made ikea pieces, cheap bookshelves I picked up at Wal-mart because I needed someplace to hang my books, mismatched beer glasses from a college apartment, or whatever - and replacing it with higher-quality items which I can keep for a long time. So yeah, I'll be shopping for stuff, but switching from the mindset of "I need something that will do right now, even if it'll need replaced every six months" to "I want something that will last me forever" should reduce consumption in the long run.
I think people are confusing "grown up" with "having made it". Having a solid and/or antique couch tells the world that you've made it. The same is true for having plenty of towels, "good dishes and nice glasses", a full pantry and "having people" to "get things done". Might as well throw in two kids, a golden retriever, a minivan, and a 401(k) - now you've REALLY made it.
There is nothing wrong with wanting those things, but to me, a grown up house is one that reflects the owner's personality, it can be silly or serious, full of books on rickety bookshelves or marble bathrooms, cheap or expensive furniture - but it has to tell you something about the owner other than their approximate annual income and age. And you can still have the two kids and the golden retriever - gives your house even more personality! I so agree with @ARTJUNK's post - you have to acquire taste not things. Let's add experiences to that - a nice trip is much more rewarding (and grown up) than an expensive couch.
PS: I do consider shopping for Egyptian cotton towels a total waste of time & money but that's just my opinion.
I feel like a better title would have been "Does your home reflect your current lifestyle?"
I hear you kariwk. same circumstances growing up.
I agree with above posters that mentioned that the article isn't about wealth. I have some friends that have sophisticated homes that look put together well on a shopgirl budget (through DIY restoring, stalking sales, utilizing gift cards) and I've been in some homes where the owners keep investing into less expensive trendy items that don't go well together at all, and will likely be thrown out or given away in five years.
Just a quick browse on Pinterest and someone can see how to make their own napkins, curtains, hand soaps, and even stored snacks rather cheaply. Sheets and towels are not something I would buy used, but you can usually find the same high-end department store brands on sale via Amazon. I managed to get Dwell Studio bedding from Anthro on sale once for $19.95!
I sincerely think the article's intent was to start a discussion on how the homes of employed and self-sufficient adults vary from say, college students or those suffering from Peter Pan syndrome.
Gross. I don't think you have to have matching glassware to be a grown up. I have always had matching glassware. I grew up with matching glassware and when I moved out for the first time, I had matching glassware. And I was grown up not at all. Stop being so elitist and concentrate on good design. In which, in my opinion, it is not important that the art match the couch. Or that there be knick knacks cluttering the bathroom. Or that I have a lot of canned goods. And multiple throws. Having a lot of stuff doesn't make you a grown up.
@HHRI - I don't see how you can say "there is nothing wrong with wanting those things" but make such a negative connotation to those things.
You make it seem extremely pretentious to have a decent quality sofa, when it's not pretentious at all. In fact, I think that eschewing the daily priorities of taking care of your own home in order to "experience life" and telling others they're buying into "consumerism" is pretty pretentious. It's kind of like when people email AT and ask where they should put their TV, inevitably one of the first replies is something like "get rid of it" or "why would you want a TV there?" ...gee, I don't know. Maybe that person likes their TV and shouldn't have to deal with others telling them they're living their life wrongly.
PI, I disagree with you. This post is about selling a shallow and specific lifestyle, one in which your home and your possessions tell the world how grown up you are. It has very little to do with actually being grown up (self-sufficient, respectful etc.) and everything to do with the appearance of being grown up. The post begins with the author being impressed that the house is big and full of stuff and this sets the tone rather well. Having a full pantry is something that only some one with a pantry can do (excluding 90% of the worlds population in one fell swoop ), being able to fill a pantry with food is something that can only be done if you have money and access to said food. There are plenty of people around who can't access medicine and can't afford extra clean sheets and towels, who can't even afford any sheets or towels. These people aren't children, they're poor. When she's talking about people who get things done around the house, she is talking about wealth. If you're poor and are lucky enough to have a house it's likely that you don't have a dishwasher but if you somehow do and it breaks, you need both the authority to call them (which you don't usually have if you rent a place from an exploitative landlord) and the money to pay them, which plenty of adults do not. People who 'make do' do not usually do so because they are childish, lazy or indifferent but rather because they're unable to do anything else. Apartment Therapy is all about lifestyles and there's nothing wrong with a post on self-sufficiency and maturity in home design, however I take issue with the idea that the lifestyle outlined above should be held up as a template for all to aspire to and a measure of how grown up a person is.
The problem is the title forces the reader to read the article under the assumption that this is what being a grown up is.
@RuthTooth - I think the post had some built-in assumptions, but you bring up a good point that there are many, many people who can't afford any of these things. Except that's kind of something that goes along with the territory of frequenting an interior design site. This entire site is full of "first world problems" and I wager most of us are lower to upper middle class. I think most of us approached this post from that perspective, where a full pantry didn't mean you were shunning or ignore the poor or homeless, but that you could actually make dinner for friends you invite over in the spur of the moment.
I try to make my home as grown up as possible, with what I have--some Ikea, some inherited furniture, 3 male roommates, 2 dogs and 1 cat. I've learned a lot from people on the web with kids about managing my roommies' clutter, although chores are still an issue.
But I don't expect myself to ever have those perfect easy milestones of a wedding and kids, so I do sometimes wonder how I'm supposed to get a "grown up" house without a wedding registry.
No matter what happens in my life, I have found that a few floral arrangements and a tidy kitchen go a long way towards making my home feel beautiful and myself, balanced.
Two comments.
Grown-up vs ...what? I think the alternative to 'grown-up' might be 'frat-house/dorm-room', when technically you are adult but maybe your decor is random and kludged. (Cinder block and board shelves, beer accessories in plain sight, mismatched roommate bedspreads, posters held up with tape...) In college I had much more important things to do than think of my decor, but still I bought TWO bedspreads and talked my roommate into using the other one so we matched, I made a slip cover for the provided "comfortable" chair, I got throw rugs. Brought in my sound system. No space or money for more, but it made our space much more homey.
So to me, 'grown-up' means decorated with intent. You make choices of what to live with and do what you can to make the environment what you want it to be... I don't see any connection to that idea with most of the musings in the post, which are about specific components that may or may not be on target for someone. Nice china and wine glasses don't mean anything to me, and I have been a grown-up for more years than most readers of this blog have been alive!
Also, I really wish people would stop equating IKEA with trashy temporary living. I think their things are perfectly lovely for the price and for the kind of use my household makes of them. I hate antique sofas, mostly they are uncomfortable and overly styled. If you are into "traditional", maybe antiques are what you should have, but if you love contemporary but are on a tight budget (or have better places to spend your money) IKEA can definitely improve your life. I grant it's not for everyone, but this constant disdain for their products is annoying.
14 years ago, we went grown up. Laura Ashley damasks, nice lamps, the whole bit. I'm no longer in the mood to decorate like my kids' parent. I don't mind being a parent, or apparent, but I don't want to have my house seem like a parent's house. I'll probably be rebellious in the nursing home.
"I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now."
This isn't about stuff, it's about calm. A grown up home is one where the ups and downs of life don't become emergencies because the people who live in the house have experienced ups and downs before so they know to plan for them. That might mean having spare batteries or clean linen to put up a guest at short notice, but it might equally well mean not running a car because you can only just afford it so any major repair is a big expense for you. It definitely means you have the number of a plumber without having to find one in the yellow pages using one hand with your other thumb over a leak (though you probably originally found him in the yellow pages with your thumb over a leak!)
I have guest linen and no car :) we do our own plumbing though...
when I first read grown-up I thought of a house with no children or older children ie. a house where there are not toys or safety things on the door. Where you can have floor plants and a sofa you don't pick out because you think it will be the most awesome at covering spilled whatever :)
A high school friend of mine recently moved to my neighborhood. We hadn't lived close to one another since we were 17 (nearly 10 years ago) and one of the first things she said when she came to my apartment was, "Wow, you have a grown-up apartment!"
I pretty much live paycheck to paycheck as a new professional so I don't own expensive things, but I do have a couch instead of a futon (and the couch didn't come from Ikea – but that's because it was cheaper than the ones at Ikea!) and I have lots of personal art on the walls in frames (some from Ikea :) ) instead of posters taped to the walls. It is more about presentation than price or number of possessions.
I think there is something that feels more permanent about an "adult" space. There is an emphasis on "home" rather than "this is where I sleep between classes/work/parties." You can no longer fit all your possessions in your car when you move (oh man, not looking forward to moving).
I think people are getting caught up in the money aspect of this. I think it's more about value and contemplation of what's in your house and this idea of becoming an adult and having a house that reflects that, in whatever terms it means to you. I also think there is this idea of home being where you spend most of your time that people grow into with starting their own families.
A grown-up home is one that you have once you are grown, psychologically more than just your age. I've been in home full of kids and kid stuff that you could easily see it's a grown up's home-they are the ones in charge, they've got the whole thing going. And then I've been in co-worker's homes-some 30/40 ish people who are intent on having the latest greatest tech gadget and can't find 4 forks in the whole place, have barely half a roll of toilet paper, and are more about where and what they will be doing that weekend away from home. It's not consumerism, it is priorities. A few people get it right in college, more after, and some not till they are 50. And the grown up home can be anywhere-even a trailer.
But once you've gotten there, it's the best. All the posts arguing about the topic remind me of teenagers asserting that they ARE grown up. It's not how many glasses match or whatever, but you know it when you are there.
Interesting. I feel that we have the components of a grown up home - inherited antiques, furniture from high end stores, and guests do remark that we have a beautiful home. And yet, it definitely does not feel grown up to me, probably because we are a bit lazy/clueless about creating a nice homey feel. I still haven't got round to putting back up artwork after painting the walls a year ago, and furniture stays where it lands when arriving in the house because I can't be bothered to think about where it will best fit.
I agree this is about having your act together... I feel grown up about having the house finished, presentable, organized, maintained, etc - the kinds of things most people have to grow into, and some never do.
It's definitely not just about money and looks... the previous owners of our home were far fancier, older and more established, and they had the place looking like a show piece. However, they were clueless and careless about maintenance, and let problems build up for years rather than read a manual or call for repair, etc.
@Usbek de Perse Excellent Bob Dylan reference
When I first started reading this article, I actually assumed it was the opposite.
Many of my single young professional friends without children live in a spacious, uncluttered condo.
Many of my married friends with children have a home with durable furniture for the children and toys everywhere.
A grown up home is what each individual decides it is.
I am 48 years old and am now sizing down to things that I absolutely need only. The extra blankets, extra dishes, extra food, etc., that the writer finds grown-up, now feel overwhelming and unnecessary to me. I guess what feels "grown-up" is subjective.
Pi, Joydreamz, Krikkit - thank you. It's too bad that so many read this piece with a mindset of poverty or a judgmental heart, rather than as a meditation on how being an adult means caring for and providing comfort to others.
Even when my family could barely keep the lights on, we always had a clean, gracious home that was capable of welcoming and ensuring the comfort of the most esteemed guest - and all were.
It's never about money; it's always about generosity.
For me, it was deciding what goes into my home instead of using all the hand-me-down things like my grandmother's ugly brown dishes and leftovers from my parent's home. When you deliberately you have, it seems you own it more. I agree with other posters about caring and comfort of others. My two best friends have dishelved homes with random things in them. When we visit, I always wonder if they were actually expecting us since there isn't any physical sign of welcome. Gladly there is always other signs of welcome but in my 40s I appreciate comfort.
There's something dissonant between what I think the intent of this post is, and the fact that the picture chosen for the post is of a very formal sitting room with decidedly un-life-friendly upholstery, that looks very staged by a realtor.
I'm trying to dissociate the words and picture, but our brains don't work that way and as a result I'm reading words like 'linens' and 'maid' with a very particular taste in my mouth.
In truth, nearly every apartment featured on AT is a better representation of grown-up home than this pic. They are grown up because they are thoughtful, joyful, made for living in, and suited to the very particular lives that their owners have chosen. They invariably include a symbolic commitment to welcoming others- whether it's an ingenious sleeping lift suspended over a dropped ceiling, or simply two matching red cups side by side on two hooks above the 18 inches of counter space.
That's what makes a grown-up home, not 10 matching place settings or a full crystal bar set.
I enjoyed the post. I also like interiors that are on a sophisticated, calm, mature side, well organized and well maintained. But.... having kids are reason????? Oh, no!!! Can not be true, I have two kids, and my house will never be "there" before they get old enough. My house is full of toys, artworks, tents in rooms, "rocket-ships" in living room etc. The dining table is covered with tons of acrylic paint and I am not getting a new one any time soon. The furniture is rather simple, 1) so it can be ruined and 2) because we are putting SO MUCH money to kids' college account and for their current classes and fun activities. My kids are having fun. I sacrifice the look of my house so my kids can actually DEVELOP and so I wouldn't have to panically scream "don't touch that!" everytime. I actually always felt the otherwise: dual income, no kids - more mature house. )))
I come from a "developing" country (India), draw a "middle class" income, and I'm not wealthy by any standard. While I agree with Ruthtooth that this definition of 'grownup' is not relevant for the poor, I do not think this post caters to that kind of audience. Moreover, I do suggest that we should treat the post for what it is = a feature about what a 'grown up home' feels like, and not about what constitutes being "grownup".
For all those who think this feature reeks of consumerism, I'd like to highlight the questions the author poses at the end of each paragraph
Ask yourself, what are the things in my home that make me happy?
Ask yourself, do I have enough to take care of myself well?
Do I have people I can rely on to help me get things done around the house?
Ask yourself, what would someone say about me if they came into my house without knowing me?
Ask yourself, do I feel comfortable having people over?....
"happy", "rely" ,"enough", "comfort" are words that have nothing to do with consumerism. And I know enough poor people (including myself a couple of years ago)to know that if they read this article, this is what they would aspire their homes to be. Its good to have something good to aspire for, and a "grown up home" that makes you happy and proud would top my list.
I am thankful for the roof over my head. It's a happy place, everyone is welcome and there's always room for one more at the dinner table. My dogs love sleeping on the couch. I recyle, and repurpose out of necessity. Most of my belongings came from thrift stores and yard sales. My home, incidentally, though modest is paid for. So is my used car. If I had an extra $20k the last thing I'd spend it on is matching dishes and Egyptian cotton sheets. Probably I'd put some in the bank and donate the rest to a school for art supplies. I am an adult.
I remember being 20 something and visiting a new friends homes for dinner and feeling their places were very grown up . When I visit someone's home I always notice the little touches that I like and think about incorporating them into my home. I am a bit of a home buddy but I don't like to do housework. Therefore, my apartment with my three roommates and two cats is practically furnished. I have an antique dresser in the hallway with extra sheets and pillows all from Target ready for guests to use on our futon in the living room. My dishes don't match, I am too much of a klutz for expensive matching dishes, instead my dishes come from Goodwill. This way I don't worry if a glass, plate or bowl breaks as they often do. I do the household supplies shopping because I don't like running out of things so I make sure we have extras.
I had a grownup place when I got cookware, eatware and things to sit on whereas my first apartment in college had two beach chairs, no cookware, and no other furniture beyond a desk and bed. That's what "grownup" meant to me.
For some people "grownup" means a formal living room like the one depicted in a photograph above. Personally, I would not live in such an environment, would not even be comfortable as a guest in such an environment.
I don't have a matching set of glassware (always intend to buy one, fail). There is a nice set of dishes, but they come from my mother. There are enough towels and sheets for guests, but they do not match. My home is not grown-up. At times it is cluttered and in dire need of straightening. At other times it is pristine and airy. There is not a single piece of furniture in here that is not vintage, with the exception of my son's bed; and except that bed, nothing cost more than 200$ on the outside.
But! My home has wonderful architecture, it's warm and full of beautifully designed and/or handmade things, it reflects my personality and creates a lovely haven for my family. The glassware I have might not match, but it is all hand-blown. My pantry is well-stocked, and I cook delicious meals in the red Le Creuset pot I bought with my first fiction sale. There is wonderful art and pieces of hand-carved wood, a tapestry and vintage blankets, and a small batallion of books. There are fresh flowers in a handblown glass.vase.
I am 35 and do not ever see myself changing. I will eventually buy some "grown-up" pieces of furniture, but I never see myself living 'formally'. But I'm happy with my home.
It seems the real point about living in a grownup house is one of lifestyle. At what point were you able to CHOOSE what sort of furniture or dishes or home decor you wanted? I don't think it matters whether your couch is thrifted, IKEA, or Room & Board. Once you are able to choose what goes in your home, you feel it's more of a grown up's home.
Along with that, some of us may feel our home is more grownup because we have extra lightbulbs or (clean) sheets for a guest bed. And whether you do the repair work yourself, call the landlord, or call an "expert", it means taking care of problems. Quickly? Sometimes, and sometimes the problem gets taken care of when it can be afforded. Perhaps grownup = responsible.
Clearly many younger posters feel the sign of a grownup home is that they are able to eschew hand-me-downs or can entertain two dozen people with matching dishes. As a person "of a certain age," I agree with Sonje. The grownup home I'm still striving for is the one where I have LESS; it's where I have only what I use, what is beautiful to me, and what brings me joy.
Seems to me you can only be grown up if you are wealthy.
I never really thought or even asked myself about whether I lived in a grown-up house or not. I always desired to own a home and then one must define for themselves what "home" to them means. The reality for me was out of reach given the escalating real estate where I grew up. I had to relocate and then timing was a crucial element as well. I've always felt like a grown-up given that I've had to adapt to changing circumstances and many beyond my control. I know for a fact, that I'm less concerned with what other people think about my home, since they don't live there. I also rarely entertain, but that is aslo due to some of the people that I've met and how I feel currently. What I know is that circumstances change and people's homes may not always reflect what they desire or even aspire too. My home is certainly a work in progress, perhaps a lot like me--always growing, changing, adapting and evolving, yet there's stability too. You're home is really the one that you make for yourself.
It's funny how not liking the room in the picture definitely prejudiced my reading of the article. Nothing about white couches or glass table tops says "home that is comfortable for children" to me. And I don't mean giving up all sense of style with toys strewn all over, just having furniture that my kids can also use without worry, since it's their home as well.
I have a "grown-up home" in the sense of being able to offer guests clean sheets and towels. I have a real bed, wine glasses and a bread knife, and I make sure I have diet coke when my mother-in-law comes over, all things my parents still eschew in the name of rejecting bourgeois conventions (or something). But my parents' home has a very personal style and is also "grown-up" in its way. It's about living the way you want to, I think, so no guest can make the call on that.
To me, being a grown up means eschewing what matters to the Joneses and acting on what matters to you. The version of grown up described in this post is different from my version. I think I'm going to eschew this version.
To me "grown up" means there is a natural progression from how I used to decorate say my bedroom as a teenager vs how I decorate it as an adult. There's a huge difference between my old walls plastered in magazines/posters/photos on cork boards to a well done piece of art/mirror/bedroom set showcasing nicely framed photos. It's not about money. It's about presentation. One day using tape to stick up a poster isn't going to 'feel right'.
Mind you as much as I'd like to have a nice AT/magazine style insert home, right now like @NatashaTar my kitchen table is covered in scuffs, paint and markers b/c of kids art work, I have lots of washable chair covers as they are usually attacked by the same items + juice bottle spills. And investing in expensive rugs? Forget it. I'm always looking for another one b/c ours will be destroyed by the end of the year.
I have two young kids. No way I could have a LR like the one pictured. Here's my gigantic expensive painting 3" over the couch! I can have some nice things but that LR doesn't belong to people with kids.
To me, grown-up also involves a place that is functional and clean. I'm not thrilled with our couch in our new place (we need a different couch to fit this space) but to me it feels grown up when things are put away and clean.
This is a beautiful room and I cannot imagine ever having anything like it though not sure why. It makes me feel less an adult to say that. I remember when my children were young and I wondered if I would ever feel like I lived in an adult home (toys everywhere, everything kiddie geared - fun but maybe not adult?). Even now I wonder. To pull a room together completely and make it look adult takes more than I seem to have in skill, but one measure for me is that when I come home, my house feels so right, in spite of its decor flaws. Maybe an adult house is just being a happy adult and living in a home that reflects that. Who knows?
I am afraid that I don't move beyond (out of) an IKEA showroom. Thanks for listing a few things to strive for and for defining adulthood.
I think folks are focusing a little too much on the picture. The picture isn't the point of the article. The article inspired me to run to Walmart and get some spoons because apparently my kids eat spoons and I sadly only had 3. Im a minimalist and my concept of enough differs greatly from say, my mother's or Martha Stewart's. I'll never have a formal dining room set with the china for display as I like simple plain white dishes. But, I like having enough of whatever it is I need and like.
I just turned 30 and although I have wanted a 'grownup' house for a few years now my husband and I have finally agreed on what that means for us. He thought we would have to get rid of our more interesting decorations like our vintage monster movie posters or our large porcelain dragon. I explained that all I really wanted were things like posters in frames, shot glasses in the den and NOT the living room and a color coordinated living room.
I don't even live in a grownup apartment.
I agree with other posters (ruthtooth and teakfreak and others) in such that extra blankets, good cutlery and the like are not what define grown-up.
Having a grown-up home is one that represents you, shows how you have grown and you feel confortable in. This should be independent of how others may have chosen to have their houses. don't let these things define you.
@TEAKFREAK..I thank you for your words as I am moving to an apartment in a very nice town, but what was available was in a 'multi'..which I did NOT want again..and not how I pictured myself, with the lack of leafy green trees..and cozy yard space..in a gracious colonial two family..I've been all horrible about it instead of grateful I did obtain this easily, to be closer to my daughter and family. Your words will make a difference to me now, to not define myself by my address but to take pride in it, whatever circumstances brought me there, financially, but I will always make a cozy home with my painted furniture and kind and welcoming ways...and CREATIVITY ; ) My cat is welcome, hardwood floors..are my tradeoff for no laundry in bldng...Many wonderful thoughts here and common sense living people..: )
This is a very interesting discussion. Some people are focusing on the quality and quantity of objects described in the article, and others are focusing on the nature of those items.
For me, this post comes hours after signing the lease to move into my first non - college-owned apartment and remarking that I finally feel like an adult. However, when our friends come over, which is often, we get a lot of comments about how peaceful our place is. These friends have apartments mostly identical to ours, but something about our space puts them at ease. I'm not the best interior decorator on the block, but we are really intentional about everything we bring into our home and I think that's one thing that is crucial to this article.
The items in a grownup home are chosen items. They were weighed and measured and entered the door for a calculated reason - even if the consideration was "do I need all of these mismatched tupperware pieces from mom? where will I put them? shouldn't I toss the ones without lids?" Or the consideration may be "I really need to keep extra batteries and lightbulbs in my home, they are essential to have."
Our furniture and belongings are a mixture of new and used, discounted and free, but they were all selected to be in our lives. My $1 IKEA water glasses sit on the same shelf the as the gold-leaf antiques from my great-grandmother; both have their purpose and both were brought into my home because I loved them, had a use for them, and had space for them.
It may be defined a lot differently in countries with "stuff" less plentiful. But here I think that that ONE definition of a grownup living space is a curated home.
I don't think that IKEA comment was to say some people don't want to stay with their IKEA furnishings. I think moreso it is that point in life where things feel deliberate. Your couch isn't the one your aunt gave you, or you bought on sale at Target because you couldn't sit on the floor. Its when you can invest in pieces that are yours and not just there.
That said my boyfriend and I have been arguing about this a lot lately. I just turned 21 and signed our mortgage in October and I CRAVE that home feeling. Right now we're debating art. He says, "21 year olds dont have ART on the wall! They have posters! You're pretentious" but really I just want something ours, not torn out of magazines to make due.
Most people I know are either in their last years of college or just got out, so I'm definitely seeing a different transition than the one described in this article. But at my school most older students live in apartments off campus, and some of what is written here still makes sense - a big difference is the sense of permanence, or investment in a space.
The example about extra linens really rang true for me, and I don't mean the luxury of having an extra matching set. For us it was quite honestly the difference between having an extra blanket and pillow for a friend who is staying with us, and having to take one off of someone's bed. My roommates and I all have to fly to get to college, so bringing extra blankets was a luxury we weren't going to do, and didn't until our space started feeling like home. Same thing with towels - this is our first time having more than two towels per person. We even have towels to dry your hands on now! Pretty fancy...
The big sign for me is pictures - grownups have framed pictures, kids just tack/tape them to the wall. *Grins.* We are trying to take baby steps towards this in our new place, and my first step is getting a framed picture of the "family" (people who are currently living in the apartment).
I actually get this post entirely, without meaning anything about the consumerist standpoint. I bought my first home this last fall, and came from what was a very temporary living situation. I don't have a lot of money, but I want the place to feel like me, to feel complete, to feel like 'home' to me and my guests. Even though it's my first condo and not where I intend to spend my life, I want it to feel like it has a sense of permanence and comfort. It's coming together slowly because I don't have lots of money, and only bring home what I love. I put extra spending money I have toward art and I shop resale and sales constantly. I consider 'nice' dishes and glasses to be things that will last, not plastic or otherwise. Random dishware pieces that I buy second had I think are quite nice. I can buy furniture second had that is better quality and cheaper than something I would buy from Target or IKEA, and I love it more. I don't think that these things make me particularly consumerist.
@urbancricket check yourself. that's just mean. I bet @fatskinnygirl has a lot of friends and family who were happy to give her and her spouse presents to create a lovely home. No need to be so accusatory. Jesus Christ.
My younger brother has a beautiful grown-up home- AND he does it on a barista's meager budget. But he buys things carefully and smartly and spends the little money he has so wisely. He cooks lovely meals and makes me feel so at home when I visit. (Makes his own cleaning supplies, tooth paste, buys home supplies at thrift stores, etc) I wish I could have such a grown-up home. I'm so proud of him. You don't need money to be a grown-up, but you certainly need to be mature. I'm getting there, but it takes some smarts.
This post made me remember a funny moment from the past. My house is very personal: full (and I mean full) of antiques, collections, textiles, art. Really, I guess it is my sole hobby, and I spend most of my free time (and money) combing flea markets, sewing, rearranging things, all for the purpose of creating my vision of home. I adore its old-world/arty/bohemian vibe, though I totally understand it's not for everyone. This was brought home (ha, see what I did there) to me when my kid was a teenager, and he pronounced smugly that when HE got his own place, it would be much more modern and minimalist, and that he would get "really NICE furniture, like from Ikea." I didn't know whether to laugh or cry (but I laughed, and still laugh when I think about it now.)
@horror vacui I know what you mean! I have a similar style. I love books and lots of precious-to-me knick-knacks and whatnot. My house is full of things that I find beautiful, though I'm sure to some it seems disorganized and not very well curated. I think that's just a testament to your kid's ability to know what he likes design wise and feel comfortable enough telling you about it, even though it's not your own taste. When I was a teenager I thought ikea was the height of style, even though i'm kinda shamed to admit it.
I understand what this post is getting at. It's a level of planning, optimising, and organisation that I'll never achieve, unfortunately. Friends find me infuriatingly disorganised and childish - we sometimes give a few hours' notice when entertaining. However, the ones who do have the patience to come over are always treated to the best that we can afford.
I do have to agree that I feel a "grown up" home is one with enough linens and food to at least whether a week or two. I also like extra linens and towels so I could go a week or two without needing to do laundry if something more important came up. I never understood the people who keep one set of sheets around and just enough towels for them for two days. Why on earth would you do this to yourself? I want to be able to come home and relax.
I feel like a grown up home to me means that I am comfortable in it, and I expect to stay, and I invite others in because I feel so good about it. I live in an old farmhouse rental, with no children, and I sometimes catch myself looking around and realizing that this is the adult version of me that used to be comfortable with a lack of permanence...and it's funny that I should feel that way, because at age 40 I am still a renter...but I do. I'm not afraid to commit, and not afraid of the implications of permanence. 15 years ago that reeked of boring, no trip to Europe, no nights out seeing good bands. Now, somehow, the exact same things to me mean garden, hosting friends and family, a general different type of internal growth.
We have our linens full of blankets for guests, and a bedroom with an extra bed for friends, and we fix what is broken. To me, this is actually less consumerism than rejecting the ideas above. We happen to have lots of blankets, but a lot of them are from thrift stores, and the furniture is a reflection of many years as an avid thrifter. I don't think that the shift from house to home is really about spending money at all. I think it's about embracing an environment where you I can easily live after coming to terms that I am a more mature version of who I have been in the past.
I think you create a grown-up home when you feel a grown up yourself, which doesn't necessarily happen with a stable relationship and children. To me a grown up home is cohesive and well put together, well stocked and with no obvious embarrassments. I'm not there yet ;-)
I think I'll have a grown-up home when I can stop living with roommates in order to pay the rent, and replace my "make-do" furniture with furniture I've actually chosen. It does add up to a more permanent sense of home and reaching one of those milestones.
We're kind of in-between, but definitely lean towards not-yet-grown-up, even though we're married and now have a child. I guess it's because we're still both in graduate school (read: low income), we rent, and got married right out of college. I'm not complaining, though---I'm cool with it (most of the time). But we definitely feel a big difference when we visit our parents' homes, and it's all the things you listed here---the feeling of plenty, especially. The concept of a spare room, spare linens, spare furniture. I do poke fun at our moms, though; though they're both empty-nesters now, their fridges are always crazy full (much fuller than ours)! I guess old habits die hard.
I really enjoyed this post and it made me feel a little emotional too.
Even though I lived with my boyfriend for 4 years in an apartment we really took care of before getting married, we bought our first house a year ago - a very old and needy one. We spent the last 14 months renovating pretty much everything, making this place our very own. I developed so many new skills along the way, I DO feel much more like a grown up now. I guess this rite of passage DID happen to me, I just hadn't realized it until reading this post (watery eyes). I totally get what the author means, there is a real feeling of abundance and self-sufficience that comes with having tools in the garage to fix our own things, extra buckets of paints in the basement to refresh a vintage piece of furniture on a saturday afternoon and yes, clean sheets/pillows to offer to our tired friends after a party. It's not about where your stuff comes from. It's about not having to call your parents everytime you need something. It's about building a Nest for the long haul. Building a place that really feels like a home. For us, it's also about feeling like we're ready to have kids of our own (watery eyes again).
I gotta say, I always loved having a pretty space to live in and always felt home even when I rented. But it's different this time. I think it's about investing yourself in your space. Giving it a lot of love and warmth, so that it can send it right back.
This would be a nice, cozy book. Someone should go for it. You can invu me and my husband about trying to create a grownup home. LOL. kind of kidding.


text:
Saturday, 04 February 2012 14:39
UFC 143 prelim report
By: Mike Coughlin
Hi all, Mike Coughlin here with your prelims report. Dave and Bryan hate you and have decided you will suffer through me doing this. Or they're busy. Anyways, the show starts in a little over and hour and this is what a fat man calls a placeholder.
Tony sure is fat. Like, moon fat.
Fight One
Stephen WONDERBOY Thompson v. Dan Stittgen
Wonderboy has a rep of crazy kicks and such. Let's see if he delivers. Well, he did, landing a big high kick that was karate-ish. Not karate kid or anything but kind of switching from leg to head kick mid-kick.
Official result: WONDERBOY by KO, R1.
Stittgen was down for a long time.
Fight Two
Rafael Natal v. Michael Kuiper
Round one
Good action with Natal fighting hard for the takedown over and over again. Natal almost got an armbar.
Mike score: Natal 10-9
Round two
Natal looks gassed. He's literally swinging around with back fists, looking foolish. Kuiper is walking him down. Natal gets a takedown with ten seconds. Not a lot in the round really. Despite being gassed and throwing weird ugly strikes, Natal DID land. I'll still go Kuiper.
Mike score: Kuiper 10-9
Round three
Kuiper lands s shot early and is swarming. He's destroying Natal with ground and pound and thus us close to being finished. Half way through the round and Kuiper looks gassed now as Natal gets up and lands a big slam. Natal is in side control and is peppering with elbows. Natal mounts but switches to a head and arm choke. Kuiper should be out but he holds on. Very good round and very close. I'll say Natal.
Mike score: Natal, 10-9, 29-28 overall.
Official result: Natal by judges decision.
Fight three
Matt Riddle v. Henry Martinez
Round one
Martinez is landing a lead right hook often. Riddle seems to not be dealing well with Mattinez's speed. Good round of all standup with an edge to Martinez.
Mike score: Martinez, 10-9
Round two
Martinez counties to land the left and he's really hitting hard. But, I think the fact that he's a natural lightweight hurts him because his power isn't translating. They slug it out and bring the crowd to its feet to close out the round.
Mike score: Martinez, 10-9
Round three
Riddle kicking now with success. Riddle follows that up with a takedown and then takes the back of Martinez. Definitely Riddle's round as he turned it in as Martinez seemed to get tired.
Mike score: Riddle, 10-9
Official result: Riddle d Martinez by judges decision (split)
Fight four
Matt Brown v. Chris Cope
Round one
Well, they kind of fought and it wasn't bad or great. It was there. I'll be honest, someone brought pizza and I got distracted. Look, it's Matt Brown and Chris Cope.
Mike score: Brown, 10-9
Round two
Cope got knocked out BAD. Thankfully the ref, Kim Winslow, decided to lolly gag and casually watch it for awhile before stepping in.
Official result: Matt Brown d. Chris Cope, KO, R2
Fight Five
Alex "Bruce Leroy" Caceres v Edwin Figueroa
Round one
Leroy starts the round off by kicking Edwin in the nuts harder than any man has ever been kicked there. Omg. Herb Dean asked, "How do you feel?" and Edwin looked at him like, "...I JUST GOT KICKED IN THE DICK, YOU IDIOT!!!!" but Edwin is gonna fight. Wow. Edwin lands a huge head kick and Leroy is in trouble!! Ground and pound then a scramble and now Leroy has Edwin's back. Round ends. Awesome.
Mike score: Edwin, 10-9
Round two
Leroy dancing around and sticking and moving to start. Edwin is tiring. And then LEROY KICKS HIM (again) IN THE PENIS!! Herb took away TWO POINTS for that. Wow. Leroy is all over Edwin. Takes him down. Gets his back. Choke attempt. Armbar try. Triangle attempt.
Mike score: Edwin 9-8
Round three
Leroy sticking again. Edwin is gassed. Leroy takes his back while standing. Edwin dives for a knee bar. Leroy defends. Decent round. Wacky fight.
Mike score: Leroy 10-9 ( 27-28, Edwin)
Official result: Edwin Figueroa d Alex "Bruce Leroy" Caceres, split decision
Fight six
Dustin Poirier v Max Holloway
Round one
Max has two different looking wings tatooed on his back. WTF?!? Big takedown by Dustin as he seemed to not like the way the standup was going. Mount. Dustin with an armbar. Oh, that's tight. Switches to triangle. Now a mounted triangle. Holds the triangle and pulls the arm for the armbar and then the tap.
Official result: Dustin Poirier d. Max Holloway, submission, R1
Dave or Bryan are up next. Have a grand night.
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subset: commoncrawl


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Eggnog Semifreddo
Semifreddo, Italian for "half cold," refers to a dessert that's chilled or partially frozen. In this adaptation, traditional Christmas eggnog is transformed from a beverage into a slushy treat you can eat with a spoon. If you don't like rum, substitute vanilla or hazelnut syrup, which you can find with the coffee in most supermarkets.
Yield: 6 servings (serving size: 1/2 cup)
More From Cooking Light
Nutritional Information
Amount per serving
- Calories: 181
- Calories from fat: 15%
- Fat: 3.1g
- Saturated fat: 1.4g
- Monounsaturated fat: 1g
- Polyunsaturated fat: 0.3g
- Protein: 6.2g
- Carbohydrate: 28.6g
- Fiber: 0.1g
- Cholesterol: 76mg
- Iron: 0.3mg
- Sodium: 82mg
- Calcium: 159mg
- 2/3 cup granulated sugar
- 1 teaspoon ground nutmeg
- 2 large eggs
- 2 cups 1% low-fat milk
- 2/3 cup plain low-fat yogurt
- 2 tablespoons dark rum
- 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
- Combine the first 3 ingredients in a medium bowl, and stir with a whisk.
- Cook milk in a heavy saucepan over medium-high heat to 180° or until tiny bubbles form around the edge (do not boil). Gradually add hot milk to egg mixture, stirring constantly with a whisk. Return milk mixture to pan; cook over medium heat until thick (about 8 minutes), stirring constantly. Remove from heat.
- Place pan in a large ice-filled bowl until custard cools to room temperature (about 15 minutes), stirring frequently. Stir in the yogurt, rum, and vanilla; pour mixture into a glass bowl. Cover and place in freezer 8 hours. Remove mixture from freezer; let stand 15 minutes. Place in a food processor; process until smooth. Serve immediately.
My Notes
Only you will be able to view, print, and edit this note.Add Note
Eggnog Semifreddo Recipe at a Glance
- COURSE: Beverages, Beverages, Alcoholic
- CONVENIENCE: Entertaining, Freezable, Make-Ahead
- CUISINE: American
- MAIN INGREDIENT: Eggs
- DIETARY CONSIDERATION: Low Sodium
- COOKING METHOD: Blender
- OCCASION: Winter, Christmas, New Year's
- PUBLICATION: Cooking Light
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Top Holiday Novelty Songs of All Time
When you're sick of listening to "Silent Night," give these novelty tunes a whirl. After all, what are the holidays without a silly song or two?
Best Holiday Novelty Songs of All Time
I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Barking Dogs Jingle Bells
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth
Tom Lehrer's "A Christmas Carol"
The Hanukkah Song
Bob and Doug's "12 Days Of Christmas"
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer
Nuttin' for Christmas
You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch
Santa Baby
We love this song - I introduced it to my daughters last year - and it inspired this comic strip: www.heropotamus.com
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|Pen Refills & Inks
|Erasers Etc
|Pencil Cases & Bags
|New Arrivals
Reviews Written by lin...
|1 to 0 (of 0 )
Great for flagging pages..., March 10, 2012
Great for flagging pages in notes!
Initially, I thought these might be overpriced, but there are LOTS of stickers, they stay stuck until you want them not to, their shape makes them look neat (unlike the rectangular flags I had been using), and the packaging is sleek and attractive -- I love carrying this pack around! My only wish is that Metaphys would make the film stickers in other colors. A lovely graduated blue or red would be fab!
Great for editors! I..., March 10, 2012
Great for editors!
I got these as a gift for my editor and she LOVES that she can make different colored notes for different sorts of comments and that all of those comments are erasable (should she have second thoughts about marking up my brilliant manuscript!). Anyway, she adored them so much that she bought a bunch for her fellow editors. Colorful, cute, and they work great!
Here's the gear that..., March 10, 2012
Here's the gear that fits in mine: cell phone, iTouch, mini Doane notebook, my flat Hobo Int'l wallet, and a pen all fit in the outside pockets. Inside, I zip my planner (it is about 4x6 and a 1/2 inch or so thick) and my glasses case. I need to switch handbags/breifbags/backpacks often, due to a shoulder injury, so having all my important gear in this little bag in a bag makes life so much easier -- and I never accidentally leave the important stuff in the wrong bag. HOORAY!
Maruman Mnemosyne Imagination Notebook - A4 (8.3" X 11.7") - 5 mm X 5 mm Graph - 70 Sheets - Bundle of 2
Super smooth paper. The..., April 9, 2011
Super smooth paper. The grid is not too dark, but perfect for keeping my drawings and notes organized and neat.


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The DEPRESSION EVALUATION SERVICE (DES) conducts studies of depression with antidepressant medication, offering eligible participants a free psychiatric evaluation and treatment of depressive disorders within the context of research studies.posted by Orinda at 11:12 AM on August 23, 2013 [6 favorites]
People see you as a horrible person that everyone should stay away from. Like this, from a recent dating thread:In the thread you are referring to, the overwhelming feedback was that the OP should not become romantically involved with someone who has obvious personal issues to work through. Not because people with personal issues to work through are bad, but because they are personal issues: they cannot be solved by intervention from a friend, or family, or a spouse. There's nothing wrong with this person for having personal issues, it's simply not in the best interest of the OP to get involved with them romantically until they address those issues and learn how to cope with them. Everybody has some "baggage", but not everybody has developed the coping skills yet.
This is truly abnormal behavior on his part. If he's alone, that's a red flag (does the man not have any friends??)
OMG, I don't have any friends??? HOW CAN SOMEONE NOT HAVE ANY FRIENDS??? Awesome: I'm a red flag. I don't think this is an uncommon opinion either. I think it is standard. And the only way to get yourself out of OMG YOU FRIENDLESS HORRIBLE FREAK is to lie about which form of square zero you're starting at. I don't like lying, but I also don't like people seeing me as someone to whom the proper reaction is OMG - RUN.
The problem is it's been that way all my life. I have never had any real friends, and I don't see any indication that it will change soon.The past is past. There's no reason things have to be that way now. A lot of people who were misfits in high school go on to fulfilling social lives in college; a lot of people who were shut-ins in college go on to fulfilling social lives in the working world. Change is possible, and inevitable.
Nobody actually expects you to go places alone. You look like the weird loner, because people go places with their friends. You end up spending money (which due to the above you don't have much of) and feeling like you've wasted it. And when they do, they certainly aren't looking to meet people. When I was out with acquaintances, like at the beach or something, I know none of us were letting randoms join our group. Again, this is default.For what it's worth, I go to things without my friends all the time. Sometimes I just want to go to get a nice fancy cocktail at the bar down the street and read a book in silence. I sincerely doubt anyone looks at people who go to bars or restaurants alone as some kind of malicious freak. If they notice you at all, they think you're just meeting someone later, or you're in town for business.
But visually, there is no difference between a person going to, say, a movie alone because they're:Yes, but also bear in mind that most of the people "judging" you for doing something that has no bearing on them whatsoever are probably just trying to mask their own feelings of inferiority. The majority of the people you will encounter in public will either a) be doing their own thing and not even notice you, or b) notice you and think, "Huh, that guy went to see The Muppet Movie alone on a Friday.. and he's wearing an ugly Hawaiian shirt.. that's sort of unusual, but not worthy enough of my time to think about it for more than ten seconds."
-a cool confident person who just wants to see that movie,
-an entertainment writer.
People might be judging you, but they might judging you positively.


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- Further Integration: The latest update to the MHTF & PLOS Maternal Health Collection
TopicsAfrica antimicrobial drugs antiretroviral treatment cardiovascular health child health china clinical trials developing world diarrhea environment ethics Ghostwriting global burden of disease global health guidelines health costs health information health policy health systems HIV HIV/AIDS influenza LMICs malaria maternal and perinatal health maternal health medical literature medical students Mental Health mortality MSF neglected tropical diseases open access pharmaceutical industry Policy public health reporting research ethics sanitation sub-saharan Africa systematic reviews tuberculosis vaccine water WHO
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Category: General Tagged immunity, infectious diseases, symposium Comments Off
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Category: PLoS Medicine Week by Week Tagged big data, domestic violence, Global Health Systems, global health tools, HIV, HIV testing, infectious diseases, narcotics, pain relief, PLoS Medicine Week by Week, South Africa, sub-saharan Africa, Violence Comments Off
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Category: Media Releases Tagged Clostridium difficile, epidemiology, hospitals, infectious diseases Comments Off
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This week in PLoS Medicine: Decreasing newborn death; H1N1; and more!
Category: General Tagged Canada, Cost-Effective, developing world, H1N1, infectious diseases, influenza, mortality, Neonatal, South East Asia, vaccine Comments Off


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62571 Apartments for Rent
Search Apartments in 62571
"You are doing to the other rental search engines, what Google did to the other web search engines.... Put them to shame! By far the best rental search engine I've used to date." - Tower Hill,IL
Popular Rentals in the 62571 areaMore Like These > >
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Apartment Living in 62571
Finding an apartment in 62571
62571 has great apartment rentals to choose from in a wide variety of different neighborhoods and surrounding cities. You can easily find a pet friendly apartment in 62571 or search for amenities like a fitness center, swimming pool or off-street parking. Make sure that you discover all that 62571 has to offer when looking for an apartment for rent.
Cities Near Tower Hill, IL
There are many great communities and cities nearby Tower Hill, IL to also consider:
Featured Apartment Rentals Near 62571.
- Lake Towers 414 S Morgan St Shelbyville, IL 62565 Phone Number: (217) 774-2167


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Main Content
Your little fan will be all set for Dallas Cowboys game days in this Oopsie Daisy tee and pants set! The top of this two-piece outfit boast a printed Cowboys logo at the chest and adorable sewn-on ribbon details. The pants have a cute stripe pattern and a sewn-on ribbon detail on each leg. She'll be a Dallas fan for life with an outfit like this!
- 100% Cotton T-shirt and pants
- 2-Piece set
- Button and loop closure at back of neck
- Imported
- Officially licensed NFL product
- Pants have an elastic waistband
- Sewn-on ribbon accents
- Two front pockets on shirt
Cowboys Customers also liked:
Special event items are produced by manufacturers only after the outcome of a game or event. These are advanced sale items and will ship immediately after they are received in our warehouse.
Manufacturer direct items are shipped directly from the manufacturer. These items are not available for international or expedited shipping.
Customized items can be personalized with options such as your name, your favorite number, and/or designs. Some options may be limited by league rules.


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Wats, Waterfalls and World Heritage Sites: The Best Cultural Attractions in Laos
From saffron-robed monks receiving alms to golden stupas, explore the best sites and attractions that Laos has to offer.
Wats, Waterfalls and World Heritage Sites: The Best Cultural Attractions in Laos
From saffron-robed monks receiving alms to golden stupas, explore the best sites and attractions that Laos has to offer.
Rose Quartz geode
no it's totally a dragon egg
definitely a dragon egg
my dragon egg
i wonder if geology people get mad at this
Most geology people would probably agree that this is indeed a dragon's egg
I am a geology major and I can confirm that that is indeed a dragon egg
(Source: ggeology)
(Source: danipupani)
animated short: by Emma Allen
Jean Paul Gaultier. Brooklyn Museum of Art.
(Source: juliachesky.com)
genieinabody said: Why do we feel dissatisfied with life? What is cause of unhappiness?
There are no gradations for being alive. One person is not more alive than another. We are all intensely and vibrantly alive. But it's when you mistake your aliveness with your life situation that dissatisfaction occurs.
Your life situation is a combination of linear time, personality, and preferences. You have a past, a present, and a future. You have an individual sense of self that has desires and aversions. Naturally such a life will have its ups and downs. And just as naturally that life will be unfulfilling. No sense of lasting perfection, meaning wholeness, will be found therein.
But your aliveness is your actual life. You can have aliveness without a life situation but you can't have a life situation without an aliveness there to experience it. Aliveness is primary, life situation is secondary.
The cause of happiness is forgetting what is primary, fixating on the secondary, and trying to find something from the secondary that can only be recognized with the re-discovery of the primary.
The nature of aliveness is awareness. Awareness is the feeling that you exist. Even though you sleep every night and lose all sense of your mind and body, you do not fear sleeping as though it were death. Even when it comes time to wake in the morning, sometimes you cling to the covers and wish to go back within. To simply exist is peaceful.
There is no need to spurn the idea of the life situation and try to destroy or run from it. All you need to do is keep it in its own place and cease to seek something from it that only the recognition of your aliveness can give you.
The life situation is a survival tool of the mind. Use it but don't be used by it. Awaken to the timeless aliveness that is only ever here and now. After all, when else are you alive but Now?
Through daily practices like meditation and mindfulness, you learn to dissolve your habits of seeking satisfaction or avoiding dissatisfaction from the transient life situation. Then you will know peace.
Namaste :)
(Source: heartcontainers)


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An Evening with Seth MacFarlane, Creator of Family Guy and American Dad
* Additional fees apply.
All offers for An Evening with Seth MacFarlane have expired.
The last date listed for An Evening with Seth MacFarlane was Saturday February 28, 2009 / 8:00pm.
Currently at Carpenter Performing Arts Center, CSULB:
Magical Musical Big Fish Brings Tim Burton Film to Stage: Exclusive Pre-Sale
- Full Price:
- $32.50 - $77.50
- Our Price:
- $17.50 - $40.00
Adapted from both Tim Burton's celebrated film and the Daniel Wallace novel of the same name, Musical Theatre West reels in the West Coast premiere of the musical Big Fish, the dreamy, touching story of a tall-tale-teller and his son, who wants to know who his father really is. Following a lifetime of spinning made-up yarns of epic adventures, Edward Bloom has entered his final chapter, compelling his son Will to embark on an adventure of his own -- to unravel his real dad from the myths he has created. With music and lyrics by Tony nominee Andrew Lippa (The Addams Family) and a book by acclaimed screenwriter John August (Go, Charlie's Angels), this rollicking fantasy set in the American South is a tribute to the power of dreaming big. With this exclusive pre-sale offer, get access to prime seats before they go on sale to the general public. Learn More
Venue Details
There is no bad seat. Theybonly have seats upto U.Disney's Beauty and the Beast info • Jul 13 2014 star this tip starred
The parking is very disorganized at MTW. Be sure to allow time going in and getting out. On the Atherton side, they are usually line up into the street. It appears there is only one line, but there is normally two. There is just no sign or person to let you know . You may see someone a block away swing their arms, if anything.'S Wonderful info • Apr 21 2014 star this tip starred
Reviews & Ratings
Featured review from Doug
view more less of this review
This event was really good... it lasted just over three hours. It was pretty much Seth telling how he got to where he is. He takes a lot of time for questions and answers and, he even took some requests. He also showed us all an un-released 'Family Guy' episode. I thought this was going to be an episode that wasn't allowed to be released. But, it was a pre-view of an episode that is yet to be released. It was very fun and casual.
star this review starred report as inappropriate
Wow this event was not what I expected. Because it's about Family Guy, a show I love, it's inherently going to be a little funny (not a total disaster). Having said that, a lot of things were disappointing.
First, Seth gets on stage and...continued
star this review starred report as inappropriate
Highlight of our evening: Our Goldstar tix ended up being in the very first row and pretty darn close to center.
We didn't show up expecting a "stand up" routine so it wasn't a big surprise when Seth prefaced his talk with that disclaimer. ...continued
star this review starred report as inappropriate
It was FANFREAKINGTASTIC! He was charming, funny, informative, especially nice, and this is better than I expected. I knew it woul dnot be stand-up since that's not what he's known for, for one. The question and answer served as Improv all on its...continued
He's hip, creative, intellectual, and has made the dysfunctional American family hilarious for millions. As creator and executive producer of the Emmy Award- winning animated series_ Family Guy_ and American Dad, in his pursuit of no-holds-barred humor.


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Why Extant Was Such An Insult To Our Intelligence
Well, it's over. The first (and hopefully only) season of Extant has come to an end. And yes, the idea that Halle Berry's character became pregnant on a solo mission in space wasn't the most promising premise, but did the show have to turn out to be such a turkey? »


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Tornado Videos, Tornado Pictures, and Tornado Articles
Severe Tornado Warning for Texas from November 20 until 24 2011
Texas is going to have a Big Tornado outbreak from November 20 until November 24 and it will be a F5 or Greater. It will be a Very Powerful Tornado is going ...
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The second hard rock comedy music video from Skippy Tornado! Featuring the lead off track from "Stick This In Your iPod", now available on iTunes, Rhapsod...
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Ever wanted to film a tornado and tell somebody what you're doing
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Angry Weather Channel Caller
There's nothing better than someone who calls the Weather Channel after they warned her about a tornado because they made her miss her favorite show.
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The Jordan Zeh Trailor Park Tornado Alert Defense System
Perfect system to prevent lives from being destroyed.
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Silly Gillman meets Mc Chris
From the washed out boston warped tour tornado warning we meet up with MC Chris
Tornado Throws Home Into the Future
Downside: The roof will need to be replaced. Upside: Playstation 12!
Hearing Voices - Episode 2
Simone uses her new abilities to help her friend Dodge recover his stolen rent money. Part 2 of 2.
Hearing Voices - Episode 1
College student Simone finds herself with a strange new ability that changes her life forever. Part 1 of 2.
Bruce Lee: The Musical
If you enjoy, please LIKE, FAVORITE, SHARE and SUBSCRIBE! Believe it or not, NOT inspired by David Henry Hwang's Bruce Lee Musical "Kung Fu!" We've had th...


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The University has signed an agreement with the online ticketing company to occupy two floors of the building located at 155 Fifth Street morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2014/January-2014/Event-Bright-Announcement.html
Content tagged "University News"
Art students sculpt "objets d'art" from old computers donated by OIT morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2012/November-2012/e-Waste-Not-What-nots.html
Quick facts about the 2012 Commencement Ceremony morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2012/May-August-2012/Fact-Sheet-about-the-2012-Commencement.html
More than forty students and faculty members from Arthur A. Dugoni School of Dentistry provided free dental care and eduation at local clinics and schools during an outreach trip to Jamaica this fall. morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2012/October-2012/Dental-Students-Reach-Out-to-Jamaica.html
Four faculty and staff members, six students and four student organizations were honored at the annual recognition event on May 9 morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2014/May-August-2014/Faith-Davies-Awards-recognizes-leadership-in-students-staff-faculty.html
Stacey Nadeau, one of the models featured in Dove's 2005 "Real Beauty" campaign that attempted to change the standards of what a beautiful woman resembles, will be at Pacific to educate young women about self-esteem and body image. morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2012/January-2012/Real-Beauty-Lecture.html
Doblmeier, an acclaimed Emmy-award-winning documentarian, specializes in films about religious believers and their impact on the world. He will speak at Pacific for the annual Colliver Lecture series at 7:30 p.m. Thursday, Feb. 23 in the Alumni House on the Stockton campus morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2012/January-2012/Colliver-Lecture-2012.html
Facts about the Gluten-Free community and a brief look at other Pacificans involved in the movement morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2012/May-August-2012/Other-Gluten-Free-Pacificans.html
Marie M. Tolarova heads the Craniofacial Genetics Lab at Pacific's Arthur A. Dugoni School of Dentistry in San Francisco, where she oversees the only cleft prevention research program in the country morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2014/May-August-2014/Finding-the-genes-behind-smiles-Lifelong-advocate-of-cleft-prevention-spreads-word-about-research.html
First responders and University of the Pacific's emergency management team carried out a simulated emergency on June 12 in Stockton to practice procedures that may be put into action should there be an emergency on campus. morehttp://www.pacific.edu/About-Pacific/Newsroom/2013/May---August-2013/First-responders-Pacific-Alert-Team-Drill-to-Make-Campus-Safer.html


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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Live action movie huh?
Live action movie huh?
I can see the screenplay now..
So they're on this epic dungeon quest, they wipe on the first trash couple of times, run back from graveyard and all of sudden one of them goes "u noobz suck, gtgthx".
And then the hunter will ninja teh lewts and HS out.
Seriously though I'd rather keep my stylized MMO chars in their own little stylized MMO world not on the silver screen.
Who's going to play the pink haired gnome with annoying voice and a mom who doesn't let him raid past 9pm?


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Kai Hendry via www.flickr.com creative commons
This setup makes sense (put nice employees in front of clients = a no-brainer) and works out well for all involved—except you, the sweetheart professional.
For you, the arrangement is stressful and trying and leads to major job dissatisfaction. Here's why:
Nice people are sensitive
Customers are loud, abrasive and impatient. They're rude. There are exceptions, of course, but anyone who's worked even one day in a client-facing position knows that people coming to customer service are usually upset. And for some reason, many clients find it acceptable to take their frustrations out on you, the well-meaning customer service employee, as if you're intentionally out to make their experiences with your company crappy.
The main problem with this is that you internalize the insults and absurd accusations and take it all personally. As a truly nice individual, you absorb this non-personal angry venting and blame yourself for the issue. The more customers you work with, the worse you feel.
Nice people are easily flustered
All you want to do as a nice person is make the client happy. That's a difficult enough endeavor on its own, but when several customers are barking commands at once, your people-pleasing brain starts smoking. All these clients need help, and most of them are mean about it, and you so desperately want to take care of all of them immediately—but the high level of negative input impairs your ability to problem-solve.
And so you bounce around from complaint to complaint, attempting to put out each fire but getting pulled away before it's out by a larger one—and ultimately, you hardly accomplish anything.
At the end of the day, you reflect on all the issues you weren't able to resolve and doubt your capabilities as a professional.
Nice introverts have it even worse
Extroverted people get their strength from speaking with others. Chatting and interacting excites and enlivens them. Introverts, on the other hand, find too much verbal communication tiring. It leaves them mentally exhausted, and they need some alone time to recharge.
It makes sense, then, that if you're an introverted employee in a customer service position—where interacting with other people is the name of the game—you're at an increased disadvantage. Not only is your "niceness" working against you, but you're also operating in an environment that depletes you of energy.
A nice customer service employee leaves work feeling offended and doubtful; you, the nice introverted customer service employee, leave work feeling offended, doubtful and drained.
The exception: when customers are awesome
There are situations in which darling you working in customer service is a beautiful scenario for all parties. For example, let's imagine you work for a charity, and your clients are donors or volunteers. Or maybe you're employed by a Hawaiian resort, where your customers are vacationers.
If the clients are participating in a feel-good activity, or are arriving at the scene already in a fantastic mood, it's likely those conversations are going to go swimmingly. That's a win-win-win for the customer, the employer and you.
Bottom line: know yourself well and navigate the professional world accordingly.
And if you're honestly nice, stay far, far away from most customer service roles.
Cassie Nolan is the blogger behind Alternative Badassery, "A creative guide to being good at life," where she covers career, writing and health topics. She also regularly disseminates awesome on Facebook and Twitter.
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