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I have recently bought a D90 and am very happy with it. However, there is one function that I cannot get it to do. It must be possible in such a sophisticated camera but I am baffled by the manuals (pathetic, I know!)
Very simply, I would like occasionally to use only the centre focus point. There must be a way to select this, but I cannot see it. HELP!!
It also occurs to me that it ought to be possible to set the Fn button to select this as a shortcut - is this possible?
Many thanks in advance for the answer to this one.


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Your baby has something to say! Let him do it on this great looking baby Tee, with one of our millions of designs that you've personalized. This shirt is made from 5.3 oz, 100% cotton jersey. It has short sleeves and a hemmed bottom. Imported.

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text:
So you got married right out of high school?
PE: Yes, about, well we graduated in May and we got married the 26th of July. I went to work on a road job in between Flagstaff out toward Mormon Lake. They was rebuilding that road. And so I bought one of these big tents like the Army used to have and I built a floor and siding, put that tent up, and I called her and told her to come on! My dad brought her in a pickup and he brought a bed and a little bit of woodstove. And we lived in that tent, because I was working right there. I was oiling on a shovel. This big shovel load of trucks, but I was oiling.
All my life I lived where there was plenty of beef, plenty of pigs, plenty of deer, plenty of wild turkeys, plenty of ducks, and we always had plenty. (Laughs) She wasn't real up to date on cooking, but she knew how to open them tin cans! So we'd have a tin can of corn and beets and string beans. But I never said a word. I was tickled to have her, you know.
The boss, or the fellow that was the operator on the shovel, he had a trailer house and him and his wife lived in it. And they were going into Flagstaff on a weekend to buy groceries and asked us if we'd like to go. I said, "You bet!"
So we went to Flagstaff. We got into the store. I edged her over to the meat counter. I said, "Would it be all right if we buy a little of this?" So we got some steak and that.
Okay, that was on a Sunday because we was working 6 days a week. Monday, come noon the operator left the shovel and went to his trailer for lunch. His shovel would be killed, no motor running because there was places I had to oil and grease while it was dead. Then I had to have that middle motor started to start the big engine and have that going when he come back from lunch. And then I could go to lunch. But I'm going to lunch today because I've got steak.
When I got to our tent, she was sitting out by a big pine tree crying. "What's the matter, Honey?"
"Well, I was cooking that steak on that stove, and it started smoking. And it run me out of the tent and I forgot to take the steak off the stove. When I got back in, the steak was burned up."
But I said, "That's all right. That's okay. Lets have another can of corn." (Laughs)
So the next Sunday, all the bunch of these guys that worked there down at Mormon Lake where the resort and stuff is at Mormon Lake? They had horses there to rent. All these guys wanted to go ride horses, so her and I went. And she had never rode horses. This feller that owned the horses, he was trying to put everybody, because some of these guys had kids and wives and all that. He'd used about every horse he had, but he said, "I believe that you're the only one the bunch that sabes these horses." And he said, "I've got a big Thoroughbred there that come off the racetrack, but he was in a wreck and he ain't right up here. You can't run him. If you do, he'll just go nutty, you know." But he said, "I believe you can handle him."
So he put her on a pretty dandy little horse. I didn't know but these guys, when they wasn't renting out these horses they'd go down there and run races, you know. When she started out the gate, I knew the minute that that horse was going to leave there. I hollered, I said, "Pull him up!" But away he went!
JM: Oh! First time on a horse! Oh!
PE: I thought, oh Dear! Just so she don't fall off! But I stepped up on this ol' racehorse that I ain't supposed to run, but down the road we went. When I caught up with her I reached over and got the bits, and here we are just like this. I pulled him in and she stayed on! But one of the other guys got up. One of them traded horses with her and gave her a more gentle horse. So we got by that deal.
Then it wasn't long after that, I took her up on the mountain. We were going up on Mount Ord and it had been raining all night. We had a camp up there at Ditch Camp, and we went left out of there the next morning, our youngest boy Flynn was there with us. He was just a tyke. She started up. She went up kind of a bank like that, and this horse slid on that mud and fell over on her. Her first horse was a runaway and the next one fell with her. She is not a bad rider and she gets by with horses, but for no more than she rode, she's a good rider.
We had a little, young horse here. How many kids did you have? You had five kids on that horse, you and Debbie? Here they come on this little young horse with five kids on it. I thought, "Oh golly."
BE: That was a good horse.
PE: Got by so, it's all right.
JM: How many kids did you have?
PE: Okay, we had three sons and our middle son was in the 2nd grade. He come home from school and he told his mother, he said "I've got a headache." So she said, "You go in there and lay down." So he did.
Was it a week later when he come the next time?
BE: Yes
PE: So we took him to the doctor and the doctor, and then did he send us to St. Johns? Or did we go to?
BE: He sent us to St. Johns.
PE: And this doctor in St. Johns told us, he said, "I have an appointment for that boy in Phoenix tomorrow. You be there with him."
So we took him to Phoenix and through these professional doctors they found that he had a malignant brain tumor. They put him in the hospital and they told us, they said, "We can burn him with x-ray and it may prolong his life 30 to 60 days, but it is going to be very painful to him. So they operated and they said they had never in medical history removed a brain tumor at the base of the brain where this was. And he never even come out of the operation. So, we lost him when he was 7 years old.
Then we have our older boy Wes, and Flynn, and they both live here by us.
JM: That's tough. You were talking about working out there at Mormon Lake. What did you do afterward?
PE: Oh, that was just. I cut these fingers off in a deal, so they took me in and sewed them on. And they wouldn't let me go to work for 30 days because they was smashed. So we come back to Show Low and I got a job. Was that when we went to Bourdon Ranch?
BE: Yes
PE: And we lived there a couple of years and our youngest boy, Flynn was born while we were there.
Then I got a job in town here. Harv Ellsworth had a cement block plant and insulation deal, so I asked him what about a job. He had a house there we could rent. So we moved back into town and I went to work for him building cement blocks and insulating. His boy, Ardell was just younger than I was, but he was the main one. So Harv would go to places like Farmington, New Mexico and over into Colorado and line up these insulation jobs. And then we would load the big truck and go and stay for a week just insulating. When we wasn't insulating, we was back building cement block again.
Then I went to work for the County. I was driving truck for the County for what, six, eight months, something like that.
Then this job became available for the Highway Department. Arlie Maxwell was the boss out here and so I asked him about this vacancy. And he said, "You bet! Get your lunch bucket and come.!"
So I went to work for the Highway Department and then they took over the road between Show Low and Heber. It was just a dirt road. But they put a crusher out there and crushed a lot of material. And they built a house. They had a piece of property in Aripine. They drilled a well and had a house, and he told me, "If you'll move out there, I'll put you on a blade." So that raised my wages quite a bit. So then, I ran a blade between Heber and Show Low.
Our oldest boy, Wesley, the Heber high school bus would come by our place, and he'd catch it and go to Snowflake to the 5th grade. But he had a grandmother and a grandfather there, if it was too much snow and the bus wasn't going to run, he stayed with his grandmother and grandfather. Anyway, that was while we was at Aripine.
JM: What was Aripine about? Just for people like that that worked for the Highway or something?
PE: At first, Aripine mainly consisted of two dude ranches. The Turleys had the boys at one place and the girls at another. They got these from New York, she come, wherever. They called them dudes, and that's what they were, you know. They come out and their parents paid a big price for them to spend the summer at one of these dude ranches. And that was basically what Aripine was.
And then up further this old man a little. And they gave him the job of postmaster for Aripine. Well, we'd get a little mail once in awhile at Aripine. But basically, I was working for the Highway Department.
Then, when our youngest son, Flynn, was going to have to go to the first grade, we moved back to our home in Show Low and put him in school. My boss left me on a blade up on the mountain toward Big Lake and on that road. So, I would blade on that road in the summertime and then in the wintertime, push snow. I had one of the biggest blades they had with a big ol' wing on it. That snow, I could throw it.
JM: It's hard to believe it used to snow so much.
PE: (Laughs) Ah, yeah, in '67 there was 73 inches in that one snowstorm in Show Low. You could not see from one building, you couldn't see across the street. They just had 2 or 3 holes that you could drive and one-way each way. But that was a tough snowstorm. And then it quit snowing. It snowed for 10 days. It started snowing on the 10th day of December and it started quitting on the 20th.
We had cattle down here that we knew was in bad trouble. Through the State, they went to bringing these big Army bombers loaded with hay, and they'd fly over where these cattle was and kick out a bale of hay for some of them. They done a lot of that out on the Reservation to the Indians.
I know Christmas Day, I was on a pair of snowshoes down there and found about six or eight cattle and got them over to where. We had a, we had found out that there was a big Cat on a truck headed to New Mexico and he was in Taylor. So Larry Whipple and I got in touch with this fellow and asked him if he would unload there where that road goes to Lone Pine.
Then I got on the Cat with fellow and we unloaded it off the truck, off the main road right there where you go over to where the dump is. Him and I went over and I showed him how to go off this old road and go down in to the bottom of the creek, which is down there at Lone Pine. And there a big bunch of our cattle was down in this creek bottom. And they was eating these willows, and some of them were eating willows that big!
But we pushed a trail to them and back up. And then we pushed a feeding ground, probably a full acre, and another trail right off into the creek where they could go to the creek and drink. Every day we took a ton of hay down and fed these cattle. Every day. (Laughs) But, '67 was quite a!
You probably read that piece that they wrote up about me out at the Church ranch, about this ol' cow that.
JM: Yes!
PE: You know, somebody wrote that up, but I . . .
JM: I know!
PE: But that ol' cow is not exaggerated. That's exactly! Eb Lewis and several of them guys, Reed Hatch was taking care of the ranch out there. This snow of '67 when we'd find these cattle in these thickets where they'd get when the snow was deep, but anyway, these guys had been packing hay up to her. And she'd run out there.
JM: She was mad huh?
PE: Ol' Eb Lewis told Reed, he said, "I'll tell you what! She's a tiger. She'll get you too!"
And I said, "Oh, for land sake!"
He said, "Pete, go get her!"
And them guys said, "We're going to go watch this!"
So we got up there. It wasn't far where the blade had made a road out of the snow, and it was just a trail tromp to her. So these guys all got behind. Boy, they're going to watch this. I walked up there and that old cow's back there in the thicket. Here she comes! Just . . .
I'm not lying to you. I reached and rubbed her head right there.
JM: When she stopped, huh?
PE: I said, "What's the matter ol' gal? These guys been bothering you? My Land, I can't believe you acting that way." I backed up about 5 to 6 feet and I said, "Well, come on."
She ran up there again.
I said, "They ain't going to hurt you. They're going to help you."
About the third time, we was out there far enough she could see the road bladed, and here she come. She'd been in that thicket for 10 days, you know. Of course, they'd packed hay to her. But over where the road come off the hill toward the corral, Reed and them guys down there. I just put my elbow over on her hip.
I said, "Is this that ol' mean cow, Reed, you wanted?"
He said, "I can't believe it. I know this; you're the only one that could have done it.
Well, I thought, there was nothing to it.
Anyway, you know.
JM: How long did you have to do that? How long was the snow?
PE: Oh, after a little later, when you could get to a corral to load cattle, I brought 7 cattle up here and fed them right up here. And I own some property right over here, right across from where that car deal is? I owned that piece of property and I put them cattle in there and I fed them every day there. But we still lost several head of cattle.
And then in the month, like I say, Christmas Day I was gathering cattle. And January it never snowed one flake of snow in January. If it had of done, our road would have still been covered up. And every fence where that snow melted, smashed down. We rebuilt fences all over the place.
JM: It was a heavy wet snow then.
PE: Heavy wet snow. But it was quite an experience of taking care of people and traffic and everything. We kept the road open from St. Johns into here. East people couldn't go through Flagstaff. They'd come in here and we kept the road open down to Salt River and on out. This was the main route for quite a few people traveling.
Later on, Arlie Maxwell was taken out of being the Supervisor and Gearald Johnson was put in Supervisor. He always, him and I run blades together. But when Gearald was put in Supervisor I became his lead-out man, so I took care of the other men and jobs and stuff. Then, after Gearald went out, they made me the supervisor of Show Low.
JM: Did you work with Chet Adams, or?
PE: Chet was a very good hand for me. Chet worked for me at the Highway Department and Chet was very good. I had a good crew, the best crew at the State. They were other of these portions in the State, they'd have a seal coat job or something and they, "Get that Show Low crew to come and do it for you." Good truck drivers, good operators and everything. So I had a good crew.
JM: Who else worked with you?
PE: Chet Adams, Herman Rodgers, Garth Nikolaus, Jay Birdno. I had about 8 men and they were good, good operators. Oh, Van Holyoak and Ted Brewer.
It was in December, because it was a pretty cold day and the wind was blowing out of the north, although it wasn't snowing. But these cattle was up here in a pasture far enough up here that it was way past time. They should have been. We go clear down by Lone Pine Dam in the wintertime with out cattle, and that's where we was headed out of this pasture out here just north of the airport.
But anyway, we had all got together there, and as we generally do, split up who's going to ride this direction and which. Larry Whipple and I was riding together and we were over on the east side of the pasture. We didn't go together very long until he split off and said he would be over a little bit to the right of me. So, as I was riding alone, and like I say, the wind was blowing out of the north and it was a cold day. And I just happened to come upon this big buck deer, and he was laying on the south side of a cedar tree in the sun, and apparently asleep because he had his head throwed way back.
I sat there and I thought, "Why can't never walk up on something like this when its hunting season?"
This ol' buck never moved, and like I say, I had the wind in my favor. I thought, I think I'll just scare you, ol' boy. So I pulled my gloves off and I tucked them down in front of my saddle, and I reached over and I undone my lasso rope. I was very careful. I made a loop and he still hadn't moved. There was just a little bush between him and me, and I thought, "I'll just ease up there a little and I might get a little closer before. I know this, the minute he hears me, he'll come straight up. And when he does, I'm going to charge him.
So I made a little move, and sure enough, the ol' buck throwed his head up like that, and then he come straight up. He jumped pretty high and I hollered just as loud as I could. Yippee! And down through the trees we went.
And the cedars were not real thick, but they were plenty thick enough, it wasn't. The further we went the less cedars there was, and one thing I noticed. When he went under a cedar tree, if he went under on the left side, he came out on the right side. I guess, its what an animal does for protection to gain on whoever is following them. But he only done that about twice until, when he went under the left side of the tree, I went on the right side and I was closer to him than he had anticipated. And about the second one of them, I'm within roping distance. I caught him around both horns.
When I did, he just turned back toward me, and he ducked his head and here he come run at me! I thought, "Man, ol' feller! I guess you're all shook up. I had to spur my horse up to get out of his way, but anyway. I would jerk him a little and then he'd run at me a little. But anyway, we played.
All of a sudden I thought, "I wonder what I'm doing with my rope around a big buck deer down here by myself? I've got to turn him loose, and I'm not going to cut my rope!"
So, then I got to thinking on down, it's not very far down there, there's a road that goes into a water tank, and I think I'll take him down there and tie him up. And so although we're going to be all day moving these cattle, maybe this evening I can bring somebody down here to prove that I roped a deer. It isn't every day that anybody ropes a buck deer.
So he'd run me awhile and then I'd run him awhile, and down through the trees we went. When I got down to where this water tank was, they have a fence around it that we could put cattle in there and shut the gate and hold them if we needed to. And although this fence had been there for years, there was a big roll of wire there. And it was smooth wire. So I pulled him up under a big cedar tree. Pulled him right up under it and I went around the tree, and I took my rope off the horn of my saddle and tied it on a limb up here in this tree. Then I got off and went over where this roll of wire was. I broke off a piece probably 12 to 15 feet long, and I came back over to him.
I stood there a minute and I thought, "You know, its going to be all day moving cattle. I do not know whether I can get here this evening and that old deer is going to fight himself all day long. I going to turn him loose."
He's still pulling back on the rope and up under the tree pretty good. I worked up to him and I got a hold of him just like I would a bulldogging steer. I bulldogged a lot of cattle. When I got a hold of him and I pulled the rope off the right horn and then, I pulled it off the left. And I thought the minute I turn him loose, he'll whirl and run to get away from me. So I never thought any more about any danger in turning him loose. I pulled the rope off and just stepped back, and he never whirled to run, he backed up about 6 or 7 feet and stopped and ducked his head and here he come!
He come right up to me and his horns were wide enough that they went right around me. But the eye guards, the horns that are right in the middle, they're the ones that hit me on the leg. I had Levis and I also had a pair of warm garments underneath my Levis. This horn on the right side split my Levis and this garment deal here . . .
BE: Long johns
PE: and into my leg. It even bled some. This horn hit this leg just head on. And all it ever done was just turn green. He hit it pretty hard. But I've still got him by the head. I've still got to turn him loose! So, I wallered him around until, just like you would a bulldoggin' steer. I got his head down on the ground and I thought, "Now, I'm going to give him a push right there, and then I'm going this way!"
JM: You're kind of on the ground too, aren't you? Because he's got you . . .
PE: Well, like I say, I was going to wiggle around to get to where I could give him a shove away from me. And I did. And I made it away from him. But he still never broke and run. He just backed up and ducked his head. So I went on around to my horse. I got on my horse. I rode up to the back of that cedar tree where my rope was tied. I undone my rope and I coiled it up. I come right back around he's still standing there with his head down.
I said, "Now, ol' feller! I'm back in the driver's seat again!"
He just ducked his head and run right at my horse. I had to pull up and jerk a new feet. I knew he could cut my horse, as sharp as them horns! So I jerked out of his way, and I said, " Well, feller, maybe you're in the drivers seat then! Tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to just leave you alone if you'll leave me alone. I'm going to ride off!"
And when I rode off and turned back to where I could see, that deer was still standing there humped up under the branches of that cedar tree. He was looking for somebody to hook.
So, I rode on and finished gathering cattle. When I met the other boys, I told them. I said, "I roped a buck deer."
"Oh, baloney."
"Well," I said, "I did! And he hooked me."
Larry Whipple said, "Well, he never had them pants ripped a while ago."
So I explained to them that I roped this deer and what I did with him. Like I say, and my wife can verify when I come home, them Levis were split and this leg was cut."
JM: And I can imagine what she was thinking.
PE: So, anyway, that's kind of the story of roping a buck deer.
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Since 1947
(based on 29 reviews)
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Reviewed by 29 customers
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Works like a charm...keeps the soap dry.
By Kathy
from Chicago suburb
About Me Midrange Shopper
Comments about Bathroom Soap Dish:
Great for use in bathroom for hand soap. Keeps soap from getting messy. Very well made...I would buy again.
Bottom LineYes, I would recommend this to a friend
Was this review helpful? Yes / No
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By PATRICK
from PHENIX CITY, ALABAMA
About Me Budget Shopper
Good idea!
By dizzygram
from Evansville,IN
This is a great little product. It does what it is supposed to do. I wish it wasn't sp bulky and I wish it came in pastel colors instead of just whiteThe thing I don't like about it is that it is too wobbly on the base. Thr suction cup holds well enough but the dish swivels and wobbles all over the place. I don't like that.I am going to try to stableize it with a little super glue. Good luck to me!I believe there is room for improvement on this product so I am giving it 4 stars.
Good idea
By Rick
from Nashville
I bought two of these. The suction cup on the one in the bathroom never would hold to the porcelain sink. The suction cup on the kitchen stainless-steel sink held for about 5 months. Now both of them are all but non-functional; they just slide around when you try to put the soap in them and pour water all over everywhere. Put a better suction cup on them and they'd be great. They drain the water from the soap very well. Unfortunately, I'll probably have to throw them both away.
Bottom LineNo, I would not recommend this to a friend
Works well, looks pretty, and practical
By Cuzmare
from Northport ME
Used for soap dish. Water drains into sink rather than softening and spoiling the bar of soap.
(1 of 1 customers found this review helpful)
I like it!!!!!
By JDI
from San Jose, CA
I love this gadget. It has solved a very long on going problem of sponges being left in the sink or in dirty water. This keep the sponge in it's own place and water just drips away right into the sink! Perfect and healthy. Awesome...just awesome!
(3 of 3 customers found this review helpful)
By good clean fun
from Nb ct
I have become a comment reader before a shop on line. this little soap dish is so great. I have a resest square to hold soap in that gets so filmy I couldn't stand using bar soaps anymore. I went to pump soaps and if you have kids your using so much more soap. because the kids just keep pumping. Since I replaced the pump soap with this little soap dish. Guess what no playing with a pump. not only that but easy to clean. Easy to suction back to sink, just great.
(3 of 4 customers found this review helpful)
By Pat
from Newport News, VA
The concept is great, but in practice, it just doesn't work! Because the suction cup doesn't work, it fell into the sink every time we tried to use it. Our counter is granite, so is very smooth and I thought sure it would be perfect.
Perfect & just what I wanted it to do
By Just Me
from Buffalo, NY
Since we have a member that is handicapped this soap holder keeps the soap in place and not slippery to grab.
(2 of 2 customers found this review helpful)
Cool and functional
By Marc with clean hands
from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Good product.It should tilt a little more.Picture does not match the product, yet I have an older one that does tilt more. It is a cool and functional soap dish regardless.


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Shehryar is a Principal at Deloitte Consulting LLP and leads the Mobile and Web team within Deloitte Digital. Tasked with keeping a pulse on current and future trends of mobile and emerging technology, he focuses on helping clients use mobile to drive organizational transformation. Shehryar identifies industries and opportunities where mobile can truly impact both user and business goals.
Shehryar has spent his 18-year consulting career advising clients in industries ranging from retail, technology, healthcare, to government. His time at Übermind, acquired by Deloitte Consulting LLP in 2012, was the early highlight of his professional life. He matured professionally alongside the company, progressing from architect and senior architect to, ultimately, President and CEO.
Shehryar grew up playing field hockey and soccer, and the PC (although he wanted a Mac) that his parents gave him in eighth grade inspired the future course of his career. He attended Allegheny College, a small liberal arts school in Pennsylvania, where he graduated with a Bachelor of Sciences degree in Computer Science. While writing his award-winning senior thesis on the NeXTSTEP platform, Shehryar fell in love with the technology - an event that further shaped his career.
Shehryar currently lives in Seattle with his wife and their two sons, who share their dad's love of Legos and soccer.
"Your success lies in your ability to surround yourself with an amazing team of individuals and inspire them to do their best work."
Connect with Shehryar
As used in this document, "Deloitte" means Deloitte & Touche LLP, a subsidiary of Deloitte LLP. Please see www.deloitte.com/us/about for a detailed description of the legal structure of Deloitte LLP and its subsidiaries. Certain services may not be available to attest clients under the rules and regulations of public accounting.
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Radically styled 2015 Lexus RC F is as fast as it looks
Lexus' new RC F coupe is a gorgeous ride. And while styling is subjective, its speed is absolute.
Lexus' new RC F coupe is a gorgeous ride. And while styling is subjective, its speed is absolute.
We spent some time with the next big Google phone and found out some surprising things.
The Air 2 is a smart refinement of last year's model, with a bevy of enhancements and the welcome addition of Touch ID.
Whether you're serious about security or simply want to spy on a mischievous pet, these clever cameras are vying for a spot in your home.
CNET editor Sharon Profis takes Apple Pay, Google Wallet, and PayPal for a test drive and compares the options.
Samsung's ultra-HD powerhouse takes on the iPhone 6 Plus and LG G3 with some of industry's most competitive specs.
A quick-draining battery is a common complaint from mobile users. What you might not know is that some apps you've downloaded are draining battery power even when you're not using them. In this Tech Minute, CNET's Kara Tsuboi reports on helpful apps that can help diagnose the battery hogs.
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- $4.99 3-Day Shipping. Any Size Order! -
HOME Philadelphia 76ers Gear Philadelphia 76ers Mens Philadelphia 76ers Mens Hats Philadelphia 76ers Mens Hats Mens $20 to $40 (68 items) Product ID: 1109218
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When it comes to showing off your Philadelphia 76ers pride, you would never ever settle for a plain jane cap. Instead, you'd rather top off your look with a sweet snapback like this adidas Stripes hat! With 3D embroidered "Philadelphia" lettering over team-colored stripes, a team logo and "NBA Basketball" lettering, this hat is full of team spirit. It also features a contrast-colored flat bill and an NBA logo above the plastic snap strap. An awesome 76ers look is guaranteed with this hat!
- 80% Acrylic/20% Wool
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HOME MLB St. Louis Cardinals Gear St. Louis Cardinals Mens St. Louis Cardinals Mens Golf & More (20 items) Product ID: 1061365
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Make sure you're ready to cheer for every great play that comes to life when the Detroit Tigers and San Francisco Giants take the field to earn the right to be called the 2012 World Series Champions with this polo from Cutter & Buck. It features a bold 2012 World Series logo embroidered at the left chest.
- 100% Polyester fabric
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- Placket with three buttons
- Quality embroidery
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The Abominable Snowman is back — except this time he's more ferociously friendly than ever. This Yeti tee from Neff features a quirky animation of the silly monster giving a "thumbs up" next to matching brand lettering that'll prove Yeti to be an entertaining pal to party with.
- 100% Pre-shrunk cotton
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- Reinforced taped collar seam
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Woodleaf man faces multiple charges
A Woodleaf man in jail on $15,000 bond faces multiple charges by the Rowan County Sheriff's Office.
Matthew Bates Perrell, 25, was arrested Saturday and charged with first-degree burglary, larceny, injury to personal property, felony larceny and breaking or entering into motor vehicles.
The Sheriff's Office said Bates broke into a house in Woodleaf on Saturday, as well as a Nissan Pathfinder and Honda Civic. He is scheduled to appear in court Tuesday.


text: Having come from dpreview's D7000 forum I can say my reporting of the D7100 review here didn't go over well. At issue seems to be WDC's contention that the D7100 starts to exhibit noise sooner than other cameras. I have noticed on examples I've seen, an improvement in visible noise over the D7000, at least at higher isos. Even at 400 iso the difference between the two while very slight might be in favor of the 7100. In any event some of the more technical forum members pronounced the WDC reviewer incompetent. I'd be interested in some opinions here on the validity, and methodology of the WDC tests. Thanks, fotoswami


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Situated along the Mississippi River, Baton Rouge is home to the Louisiana State University Tigers, Southern University Jaguars and the full-service Holiday Inn® Hotel Baton Rouge - South. The hotel's I-12 locale is just 11 miles from Baton Rouge Metropolitan Airport (BTR) and seven miles from downtown, offering convenience for business and leisure guests.
From exciting museums to family entertainment, endless options await this
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From exciting museums to family entertainment, endless options await this hotel's patrons in Baton Rouge, LA. Since we're near LSU and SU, fans can easily catch a game or explore the many campus attractions. Teams visiting All Star Lanes, Cypress Mounds or Oak Villa Ball Complexes, find this hotel's location ideal.
Surrounded by Scott Construction, Community Coffee, ExxonMobil and the Women's Hospital, we have everything you need for a productive business trip, including free Wi-Fi access and a Business Center. If you're planning a meeting or reception in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, this hotel's facilities include 13 flexible rooms with enough space for up to 350 people.
Southern hospitality and modern features combine to make this hotel the perfect choice in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. The hotel's restaurant, Cafe Galvez, serves both a breakfast and lunch buffet and an a la carte dinner menu. Enjoy year-round swimming with indoor and outdoor pools and a Fitness Center to help your maintain your workout routine. Make your reservations today!
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MARMOT Boys' Ether Hoodie
Item: 13222303 Product Description >
Regular Price: $58.00 SALE $29.98
MARMOT Boys' Ether HoodieWind resistant, water repellent, and breathable, Marmot's Ether Hoodie lets boys survive variable weather. When the weather changes, pack this Marmot hoodie into its pocket and keep moving.
- Ultralight construction with polyester ripstop fabric and DWR (durable water repellent) finish
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- Packs into its pocket for easy transport
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Fiber Content: 100% polyester ripstop
Country of Origin: Imported
MARMOT Boys' Ether Hoodie
EMS_Sale Yes Packability Highly compact Insulation Type N/A Removable Liner No Back Length 20.5 in. (52.1 cm) Insulation N/A Ventilation Underarm mesh Waterproof Material N/A Weight 5.3 oz. (150.3 g) Waterproof No Activity/BreathabilityLev Moderate Hood Type Yes, fixed Construction N/A Fleece Weight N/A Insulation Rating N/A


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Around the Garden
Get More Curb Appeal with Encore Azaleas
Curb appeal, the term that realtors use to refer to the allure of a front yard and entryway, is important when selling a house. But it is about more than marketing. It's about creating a landscape style that reflects your personal panache and welcomes visitors to your home.
Container Planting Encore Azaleas
Smaller-sized Encore Azaleas are perfect for mobile container gardens while larger varieties help sustain lasting beauty wherever you place them. For added interest, pair your Encore Azaleas with other seasonal color in the form of annuals, perennials or grasses...
Make a move
Fall is an ideal time to transplant Encore® Azaleas. Follow these steps to transplant properly.


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Sorry Guys and Gals but finally had enough, have now deleted all images apart from ones that are still in current site competitions. As no one in change of this site seems bothered to do anything about this sad little Man or Woman who have to rate their own images highly but continually down rate other peoples images with 1* or lower without giving any reason as to why, then I can no longer be a contributing member of the normal gallery pages, I shall be entering competition that I like and popping in now and then to see how you are all doing.
Happy snapping All Aidy


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CommunityWhite Pages | Marketplace | Local Business Search | Articles | Artists | Bands | Small Businesses | Crime | Events | Movies | Neighborhoods | Schools | Weather | Zip Codes | Local Landmarks | Dallas Airport Flight Tracking | Attractions | Bars and Nightclubs | Events | News | Opinion | Restaurants | Travel
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Dallas is the third largest city in Texas and the ninth largest in the United States. The city has a memorable slogan. "Live Large, Think Big." Dallas offers a richly diverse culinary scene, luxury accommodations, professional sports, and a variety of shopping opportunities.
The museums in Dallas reflect the think-big attitude. The Dallas Museum of Art, for example, has collections covering everything from ancient Mediterranean and Asian art to works by modern greats like Pablo Picasso and Jackson Pollock. Permanent collections of African, European, and American art and other special exhibitions are on display.
The Dallas World Aquarium boasts a 22,000-gallon tunnel with a panoramic view of underwater reef life is the centerpiece of this popular aquarium, which also runs a preservation program involving young green sea turtles.
Dallas is known for a variety of styles of cuisine, so you can exercise your passion for food at any time. But, give in to your Texas side and enjoy the Mexican, Tex-Mex, and even the barbecue foods you find here. There's a magnificent five-star restaurant called The Mansion on Turtle Creek. Located in Owl Creek, The Mansion serves New American Cuisine. Dallas is reported to have more restaurants per capita than New York City.
As far as popular music goes, tourists can go to the Deep Ellum section of town and bask in the history of the blues dating back to the 1920s. Robert Johnson and Bessie Smith played there in their days. The area is more upscale now and home to bars, pubs, loft studios and artists enclaves.
Dallas has its share of sports teams as well. These include the Dallas Desperadoes for arena football, the Dallas Mavericks for the NBA, and the Dallas Stars for the NHL.
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Naughty Asian teen lesbians are enjoying some time off before they go back to school from swim class. There is a small infirmary off the locker room that they have found and are using to fool around in. They think they won??t be found out but the security cams run in there too. So, if the guards decide to check them, which hardly ever happens they will be seen and theuir secret will be out!
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Is your teen on the track to a meaningful future? Are you finding out what a joy it can be to help make the most of how God has wired him or her?
Many of us want to help our teens dream big, fulfilling, God-honoring dreams. But how do we do that?
The first step is to understand the great experiment known as your teen. In all of human history, there's never been another person with your teen's exact mix of God-given personality, talents, interests and spiritual gifts. As the two of you get to know that unique wiring through self-tests like the ones in the book Wired by God, you'll start to see which kinds of dreams might make a good fit.
Here are some questions you can use anytime to find out how God has wired your young person:
And this one from Doug Fields, a youth pastor: "If you could design a specific way to serve God and knew you wouldn't fail, what would you do?"
Remember that your purpose is to listen and learn, to better understand and appreciate your teen's uniqueness. This is not the time for lectures and advice. Figuratively speaking, you need to have big ears and a small mouth, tough skin and a tender heart.
Another way to learn by questioning is to talk with others in your teen's life: teachers, youth group leaders, coaches, school counselors, Scout leaders, Sunday school teachers, parents of close friends. Ask what they've observed about your child's likes and dislikes, interests and passions, abilities and aptitudes.
Often these people will confirm your own observations. Sometimes, though, they'll describe a side of your teen that you hadn't noticed — or offer an insight you'd overlooked.
Here's a way to help your teen pinpoint his or her interests and natural abilities. It's based on "The Vision Quest," a tool developed by Tim Sanford, a counselor at Focus on the Family who works with a lot of young people.
Give your teen these instructions:
On a piece of paper, list the things you've done since the fourth grade. We're talking about academics, sports, social events, the arts, student government, hobbies, interaction with family and friends, personal adventures, youth activities, socials, special events, camps, worship, leadership, volunteer work, mission trips, "helping out," clubs, service projects, job duties, volunteer or assigned tasks, and chores.
You don't have to compile your whole list at once. Allow two or three weeks, adding to it as new memories come to mind. If you don't know whether to include something in the list, go ahead and put it down anyway.
Now give each activity a "positive" or a "negative" rating. How did it turn out? How did it affect you?
After several days, pull your worksheet out and think again about the events to which you gave a negative value. Look for patterns. For example, if events connected with mechanical things (fixing the car, building something, helping with props at the school play) consistently ended in disaster, you're probably not the mechanical type.
Now move to the positive side of the worksheet. Ask yourself the questions below as you look over those events.
A spiritual gift isn't a natural ability with which you're born. It's not an office, position or job you hold.
Spiritual gifts are abilities that allow you to perform specific tasks beyond the realm of human skill. They're given to believers in Jesus Christ only, and they're given as gifts — not as a result of your maturity level, prayer or education.
Whether all spiritual gifts mentioned in the Bible are still available today is a controversial issue. But it's generally agreed that every Christian has at least one spiritual gift. It's up to your teen to discover, develop and exercise his or hers. You can help.
Tell your teen that understanding one's spiritual gifting has several phases. He can begin by praying to understand the gift(s) the Holy Spirit has already placed inside him. Explain that you don't ask for a gift, you ask to be made aware of it.
Next, encourage your teen to learn by doing. Help her get involved in situations where she has to depend on God's Spirit to get something done. Let her work on projects inside and outside your church, getting ongoing, honest feedback from spiritually mature friends and leaders. Suggest that she ask your youth pastor, a coach or a teacher who knows her well what gifts that person sees in her.
There's no "complete" list of spiritual gifts, but partial lists are found six times in the New Testament. You may want to read these passages with your teen:
This discovery process offers two benefits for both you and your teen. First, it's one of the greatest "treasure hunts" you could ever embark upon. Second, it lets you steer your teen toward experiences that reveal and cultivate gifts that can be used for a lifetime.
Your teen's brain has two separate but connected halves known as the left and right hemispheres. Each controls different ways of thinking and perceiving. Your teen uses both sides of her brain but has a preference for one over the other.
When you do something that's in line with your brain preference, it doesn't take a huge effort. But a task that requires using the other side of your brain makes it work 50 to 100 percent harder.
The left side of the brain handles sequential, logical, rational thought. Memorizing, spelling, vocabulary, language and mathematical formulas come easily to it. So do following rules and making decisions based on logic, proof, and facts.
The right side of the brain, meanwhile, is in charge of creativity and feelings. While the left side takes bits of information and arranges them in a logical order, the right side entertains random thought patterns.
What does all this mean for your teen's future? It means she'd better take her brain preference into account as she considers the kind of work she'll do and where she'll do it.
Whether she's at work or in school, her brain will want to stay on the side where it functions most naturally. Forcing herself to use the "other" side of her brain all the time can lead to headaches, fatigue, burnout and frequent illnesses - not to mention procrastination, frustration, mistakes, poor concentration, moodiness, memory problems and a pretty low view of herself.
As your teen thinks about what classes to take, remember that subjects like these may be easier for left-brained people: math (algebra, statistics or calculus), history, civics, reading, technical writing, research, electrical engineering, public speaking, debate team, typing, accounting and bookkeeping.
In which career fields do you find more left-brained people? Corporate presidents, chief financial officers, lawyers, physicians, accountants, bookkeepers, auditors, dentists, electrical and electronic engineers, assembly-line workers, managers and supervisors of all types, operating room and intensive care nurses, mechanics and machinists.
On the other hand - or hemisphere - which subjects in school may be easier for right-brained people? Math (geometry, trigonometry), biology, music, creative writing, foreign languages, drama, dance, choreography, chemistry, physics, art, design, philosophy, sociology and cultural anthropology.
In which career fields do you find more right-brained people? Consultants of all types, philosophers, emergency room physicians, psychiatrists, artists, writers, entertainers, musicians, composers, elementary and high school teachers and coaches, actors, dancers, designers, interior decorators, counselors, chaplains, public relations and marketing people, pediatricians and pediatric nurses.
Being extroverted or introverted isn't a matter of whether your teen "likes people" or "doesn't like people." It's about where he goes to get energy and where he focuses most of his concentration. Introverts find energy in their inner world of ideas, so they require less from the outside world. Extroverts find their energy in things and people; pulled by this outer life of action and interaction, they spend less time with thoughts and concepts.
Can you have both "innie" and "outie" traits? Sure.
Is it better to be an innie or an outie? Neither. Both have their strengths and weaknesses.
If your teen is more of an extrovert, he tends to like action and gets along well in social settings. He's likely to be an optimist. He gets bored or impatient with slow jobs and slow people, enjoys talking on the phone, and is generally confident and relaxed. He tends to work well under pressure, like when he takes tests.
What jobs do extroverts tend to like? Look for those that provide lots of activity, variety and stimulating input. Your teen probably will do best where he has plenty of interaction with people, many things going on at the same time, and deadlines to meet. Extroverts also enjoy jobs that let them turn ideas into reality.
In which career fields do we find more-extroverted people? Here are some: marketing, restaurant managers and workers, actors, salespeople and sales managers, dental hygienists, bank and office managers, religious and personal service workers, hairdressers and cosmetologists, self-employed business people, and teachers.
If your teen is more introverted, she tends to focus her energies inward; she's energized by times when she can be alone to ponder her thoughts, let her mind wander. She needs time to reflect before taking action. She's always asking questions (though not always out loud), tends to be more negative than positive in her outlook, and may get tagged as a pessimist. She tends not to work so well under the pressure of exams.
What kinds of jobs work well for introverts? Consider those that would allow your teen to work alone for much of the time, and where the stimulation level is low. She'll probably do best where she can have her own quiet space and work at her own pace. She may prefer an environment with fewer deadlines, one that lets her think up ideas and overcome the challenges that stand in the way of their becoming reality.
In which career fields do we find more-introverted people? Electrical and electronic engineers, chemists and other scientists, librarians, archivists and curators, mechanics and other repair people, lawyers, computer programmers, physicians, health technicians, priests and monks, and college professors.
Helping families thrive with the support of friends like you.
Adapted from Wired by God: Empowering Your Teen for a Life of Passion and Purpose by Joe White with Larry Weeden, Copyright © 2004, Tyndale House Publishers. Used by permission.
Thanks to counselor Tim Sanford for his contributions to this article.
Experts have defined three sensory systems through which people tend to "take in" the world: visual (seeing), auditory (hearing) and kinesthetic (touch, taste, smell). Your teen has a sensory preference, too. It has a big influence on whether he's succeeding or struggling in school — and on the kind of career that may fit him in the future.
Sensory preference refers to the type of sensory input that registers most quickly in one's brain. Unimpaired, we're able to use all the senses. But each of us tends to rely on sight, sound or touch for more of our "data collecting" than on our other senses. We feel most comfortable and understood when we get data through our preferred system — visual, auditory or kinesthetic.
Which of the three senses is best? None. All have their place. We can become competent in any of the three senses — but we still have a natural preference for one.
Collecting information through your preferred system comes easily and energy efficiently. That's why you tend to gravitate toward, and return to, environments that reward your sensory preference.
Being visual doesn't mean you need to become a photographer; being auditory doesn't mean you should be a professional musician; being kinesthetic doesn't mean you must throw footballs or potter's clay for a living. But knowing what type of sensory stimuli gets your attention most quickly can help you focus on activities and situations that match your preference. It can also help you to understand why you feel more comfortable in some environments and less comfortable in others.
Auditory people tend to prefer careers that let them use their ability to listen and talk. In which fields do we find them? Here are some examples: musicians, singers, instrumentalists, psychotherapists, counselors, speech therapists, talk-show hosts, public speakers, radio broadcasters, telephone communicators, and foreign language translators.
Visual people tend to gravitate toward careers that allow them to use their sensitivity to appearance — both in absorbing information and in expressing themselves. They usually excel at tasks that require "eagle eyes."
In which career fields do we find visual people? Here are some examples: airline pilots, firefighters, sharpshooters, marksmen, TV or movie entertainers, designers, models, sign-language translators, and air traffic controllers.
Kinesthetic people tend to select careers that allow them to express themselves in physical ways and in tasks that require "the right touch."
In which career fields do we find kinesthetic people? Here are examples: athletes, dancers, surgeons, therapists (physical, occupational, or massage), computer programmers, artists (painting, pottery, sculpting), sign-language translators, mechanics, machinists, chefs, and cooks.
Experts say it's best to structure your life so that about 70 percent of your waking hours are spent in areas where your preferences naturally lie. Life is much more than a career, of course, but since a job takes up a large part of those waking hours — working and thinking about work — your teen will be much happier if her career fits her preferences.
Even within a career field, it's good to look for a niche that fits your teen best.
Even within a career field, it's good to look for a niche that fits your teen best. For instance, pediatrics is normally better for a right-brained nurse, while the intensive care unit usually will be a better fit for a left-brained nurse.
If your teen chooses a career that doesn't match her brain preference, she'll need to make up for it in other areas of her life. If right-brained Kevin's job requires him to manage, schedule and make decisions, he'll want to allow plenty of time for walks in the park, journal writing and singing on the church worship team. These activities will give relief from the brain strain he feels at work.
If your teen is left-brained and extroverted, look into careers that involve negotiating, leadership, goal setting and decision making, management, mechanics or repair.
If your teen is right-brained and extroverted, consider careers that involve troubleshooting, entrepreneuring, self-directed activity (consultant, small business owner, truck driver), marketing, public relations, teaching or counseling.
If your teen is left-brained and introverted, explore fields that involve researching, diagnosing, accounting, bookkeeping, engineering and following detailed instructions accurately.
And if your teen is right-brained and introverted, check out occupations that involve computer programming, acting, music, composing, guiding, counseling, pastoral activities, self-directed work situations (resource specialist or consulting), or designing new things.
Here are three steps counselor Tim Sanford recommends to a teen piecing together her personal puzzle:
Following these three steps will help your teen develop mentally, physically, socially and spiritually (see Luke 2:52) into the person God has designed him or her to become.
Many young people have yet to zero in on a specific dream for the future. One of the simplest — and most effective — ways to help is to encourage them to try a wide variety of activities:
Some of these efforts won't go so well, but that's okay. Your child may learn which interests not to pursue — an invaluable lesson. Other efforts will show promise, meriting further study and practice. Sooner or later, one may prove to be the most enjoyable and natural fit in the world.
Thanks to Dr. Arlene Taylor and counselor Tim Sanford for their contributions to this article.
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God — this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is — his good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans 12:1-2, NIV).
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God — this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is — his good, pleasing and perfect will (Romans 12:1-2, NIV).
The most important skill you can teach your teen is the renewing of his mind. The mistake many parents make is to try to renew their teen's mind for him. Renewing the mind is a day-to-day process of thinking biblically. You might remember in our last issue we talked about how to choose God's reality as the Bible defines it rather than alternate and counterfeit versions of reality. The car commercial that promises significance through horsepower and luxury is presenting a "truth claim" that is counter to the truth claims of the Bible.
The world is full of counterfeit truth claims, but you can teach your teen to live according to God's reality. When the mind is renewed, God's will and reality become clearer. You may be thinking, But how do I teach my teen the skill of renewing the mind?
To get started, you should first prepare your teen.
Begin by making sure your teen has the right set of expectations. Some people approach God's Word with the wrong set of expectations.
For example, does the Bible promise that if you follow all the commandments, you will have no struggles in life? Of course not. But it's not uncommon for a person to read the Bible with this kind of faulty expectation.
When your daughter opens the Bible, what should she expect? Teach her to look for who God is and what His world is really all about.
Next, help her understand that reading the Bible is having a conversation with God. As she reads, she can look for things that apply to her own circumstances and place in life.
The next step in helping your teen to renew their mind is to give them a biblical perspective.
Put God's Word into the context of your teen's everyday life. Many parents make the mistake of assuming their teen's world is the same as their own world.
Start by looking closely at your teen's world. Walk in his shoes. Listen to the messages he gets when he walks into the classroom every day where a biblical worldview is challenged.
Consider the effect of video games he plays or TV he watches. Your first challenge is to step back and evaluate the messages your son is getting throughout the day.
Next, help your son gain a biblical perspective on these messages. Ask:
Speak about God's truth in contrast to the other messages. You might say: "The Bible says you and I are going to live forever, and we have a unique opportunity every day to do things that will last into eternity. What do you think we could do today that would last forever?" Or, "When God looks at you, what does He see?"
In addition to helping your teen gain a biblical perspective, you should also teach them about spending personal time with God.
Help your teen carve out regular, daily time with God to study the Bible and pray.
When I was a new Christian at the age of 17, a Young Life leader said to me, "If you read your Bible every day, God will tell you all kinds of things that will help you know how to live your life!" Boy, that got my attention.
Encourage (don't nag) your teen to commit to a specific time every day. Have him pick the time and spot.
In my own parenting, this challenge led my wife and me to talk with our 14-year-old son about canceling all the video game time for the rest of the school year to make room in his life for prayer. Commitment takes sacrifice.
Here's another suggestion:
Start out small (perhaps 10 or 15 minutes to begin). Divide the time into three simple activities:
Learning from God's Word is a corporate activity. Your teen should learn from God's Word with other people, starting with you.
Listen to Dr. Dobson or another radio teacher on a regular basis, discuss Sunday's sermon at the dinner table on Tuesday or attend a family camp this summer.
Psychologists say your teen's peer group is important to his development as a person.
Find rich environments where your teen can learn from God's Word with his peer group. Often that will be a Bible-focused youth group, but it also might be a Bible study you start in your home, or a conference teens attend together. Continually evaluate the quality of the teaching and converse with your teen about what he is learning.
Finally, in helping your teen to begin renewing their mind, emphasize the importance of the quest for truth.
Discovering what it means to live out our faith is a lifelong journey as we integrate what we believe with every area of life.
God will be with us, which is the most important part of the quest.
Teach your teen that God desires to reveal His truth to us. God is personal. He talks to us all the time: through creation, through others, and most clearly through His Word.
We can trust God's Word, expecting that He will do what He promises: speak to us, lead us, provide for us, give us everything we need for life and godliness in Christ Jesus.
Share your own quest with your teen so he knows the power of your story. Learning to think like a Christian requires renewing the mind. Teaching your teen how to do this and live according to God's will — and why that's important — might be the best gift you can give.Learn the art of asking great questions. Jesus asked so many good questions. In fact, He often answered a question with a question!Start by carving out time for you and your teen to talk. Engage your teen with life questions that apply directly to your teen's circumstances. For example, you might ask, "Have you ever read anything in the Bible that might apply to that?" or "Have you looked at Proverbs to see what God might have to say about that?"
What you can't do is ask a question that has an obvious answer or that implies you already know what the right answer is, kind of a "warmer, warmer" sort of hunt for the answer. Make the question a legitimate one so your son finds the answer on his own.
Of course, there are no hard and fast rules. Recently my son accompanied me on a business trip where we had a heart-to-heart talk. I was ready with life questions to get us talking. Before I started rattling off the questions, I asked God what He thought I should focus on. His answer surprised me: "Ask him what was his favorite part of the day."
When we say someone serves as a role model, we mean the individual is someone others admire or try to emulate. For teenagers this often means the person is someone they want to be like — whether it's because of the person's lifestyle, athletic prowess or the attitudes the person shows.
Some of those role models are celebrities out of your teen's reach (athletes and movie stars), while others are in his or her own circle of influence (youth ministers, teachers and other parents). What do those people have that make them attractive to your teen?
Why do teens look up to the other adults in their lives? Whether or not we like it, parents are sometimes considered the enemy. Teenagers might see their moms and dads as judgmental and unconcerned about their lives. Two qualities, therefore, are crucial to being a role model.
Being a role model to your teenager may seem like an impossible undertaking. But realize that your young person needs someone just like you — someone who loves him or her and who can point in the right direction.
Copyright © 2005 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
OK, let's be honest. One of the biggest challenges facing parents is training your teen to consider the needs of others over their own needs and desires; to serve instead of being served; to give instead of getting.
While I would consider my 15-year-old son a considerate and kind person who strives to meet the needs of others, when I look at my own struggle with overcoming self, I know that my son has a long learning curve before him. I also have the same learning curve trying to teach him how to live a selfless life.
To move from a place of selfish to a place of selfless is the challenge of a lifetime. And yet that is exactly what God calls us to do. Moreover, God's word promises that this is the place where we will find the greatest significance and purpose for our lives.
When teaching your teen what it means to live a selfless life, consider the following:
Several years ago two psychologists conducted a study of seminary students to see who would stop and help a man in distress. The study, of course, was inspired by the story of the Good Samaritan.
You remember the story in Luke 10: Jesus had commended a young man in answering correctly that the whole Law could be summed up in the command to love the Lord your God with all your heart…and your neighbor as yourself.
Next, the young man, wanting to justify himself, asked Jesus, "Who is my neighbor?" At that, Jesus tells the story of the Good Samaritan.
So, based on the truth in this story, the psychologists set up a scenario that asked seminary students deliver a short talk on a biblical theme, then walk over to a nearby building to present it. On the way over, each student ran into a man slumped down, coughing and groaning, clearly in distress. Who would stop to help the man?
To try and predict who would stop, the psychologists studied the seminary students' motivation for entering the ministry, and their beliefs about helping others. They also primed them by reviewing the story of the Good Samaritan before they crossed the road. However, psychologists discovered that none of these factors indicated with any accuracy who would help the man.
However, there was one factor they discovered was an accurate predictor: time.
Each seminary student, prior to crossing the road, would receive one of two directions. The experimenter would look at his watch then say either, "You're late. They were expecting you a couple of minutes ago. We'd better get moving" or "It will be a few minutes before they're ready for you, but you might as well head over now."
Wow. Do you catch that? The determining factor in whether the distressed man received help was whether or not the student had time to do it.
Action Point
Take a hard look at your schedule and the routines in your life and your family's life. To create room for selfless living, cut out some things. Allow a margin for working on behalf of others. You may not see the man in distress right now, but you can be sure that if you make room for him now, not only will you see him later, you will also have time to stop for him.
Helping families thrive with the support of friends like you.
I told my son the story of what happened to me in ninth grade. There was a particularly awkward and painfully shy boy in my P.E. class who was often the target of merciless teasing, bordering on harassment.
I didn't participate, but like many of the other students, I got used to standing by and seeing it happen.
One day, things went too far. One thug in the class started pushing this boy, then for no apparent reason except for sheer cruelty, he punched the boy in the nose. Before anyone knew what was happening, blood came gushing out this boy's nose. Everyone scattered.
Even today I can hear the question the principal asked me later that day as I sat in his office explaining what happened: "Why didn't you do something to stop it?"
That question, of course, changed what I did in every circumstance from that day forward. And it serves as a great picture for my son, when I ask him, "What would you do?"
Why do we act on behalf of the neglected, outcast and wounded? Because God does. And He calls us to do the same.
To revisit the story of the Good Samaritan, do you remember what the young man's question was? "Who is my neighbor?" As was often the case, Jesus didn't answer the man's question, but rather dealt with the underlying issue. Instead, Jesus told him what a good neighbor is. Then, in effect, he said, "Go and be a good neighbor to everyone you meet who is neglected, outcast, or wounded."
Engage your son or daughter about what he or she sees and experiences at school. Rehearse what standing up for a person who is the target of teasing might look like. Help your teen to consider what it might cost to stand up, then to be prepared to pay that price on behalf of this person.
Last Christmas, as a family, we pooled some of the money we had set aside for presents and used it to impact others.
Samaritan's Purse Ministry gave us the opportunity to purchase practical presents like a chicken, or a goat, or a month of education for a child. Or, for a few hundred dollars, we could purchase a child slave out of slavery in a third world country, and give him or her a chance for freedom.
What a powerful experience it was for our family to sacrifice a little bit to have a role in setting a child free from slavery!
From this experience, my family engaged in discussions about God's character and heart to set us free.
Imparting a Christian worldview is, at the core, about getting to know God better. As you journey with your teen learning to live a selfless life, if you make the target knowing God, you will be better able to see the world as God does.
Copyright 2005 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
Today, more than ever it seems, teenagers are at no loss for involvement in activities. Family, school, church, friends, neighborhood sports leagues and clubs. But can anyone — even an energetic teenager — do it all?
It's tempting to look at young people as having unlimited energy reserves, but they don't. Concerned parents want to know how to help their stressed-out, over-worked, too active kids. And with good reason: Stress, lack of sleep and constant emotional and physical overexertion can wear on teens, just as it does on adults.
Maybe you're asking yourself what many parents have asked: What can I do about my teenager having too many activities that can lead to burn out? How do I deal with emotional distance as a result of fatigue? How can I help my teen who is just plain stressed out from being on the go too much?
You're not alone. Other parents want to know how to help their kids slow down, too. Noticing there's a problem and asking for help is a good place to start.
Q. My teenager is involved in so many activities: school, babysitting, church, sports. She just can't say no to people, and I'm afraid she's a candidate for burnout. How can I help her find a healthy balance in her life?
A. Kids learn by example, and most parents are over-committed themselves. You may have passed this "trait" down without even realizing it. Remember, every time we say yes to something, we must necessarily say no to something else, whether we want to or not. I guarantee it.
Keep this principle in mind: Choose your no's carefully. Before saying yes, stop and identify exactly what you will be saying no to. It's usually life's less tangible things — down time, sleep, family, quiet time with God — that get pushed aside. Those are the items we say no to most frequently.
Before making a new commitment, consider what might be sacrificed. Then ask yourself, "What will be the cost of saying no to (X)?" "Can I afford to say no to (X)?" "Is (X) wise to say no to?" Be honest with yourself and ask God to reveal the best option. Base your decision on your ability or willingness to say no to (X) rather than your desire to say "yes" to something new. It's harder than you might think. Most choices will not be between the bad and the good; they'll be between the good and the better.
Telling someone yes is easy. That's why so many adults — and teens — are overcommitted and bordering upon burnout. Also, insecurity can drive us into "performance" mode and make us reluctant to say no to others out of fear of rejection. Your daughter needs reassurance that her value lies in who she is, not how many hoops she jumps through for the people she wants to please.
One more note for parents: If you're overcommitted, you may need to say no to some good things in order to say yes to the best thing . . . your teenager.
Q. My son seems burned out, but when I ask him, all I hear is "I dunno." How can I get past that invisible wall?
A. I understand your frustration. His response is just another clue that you may be right about his being burned out. When pushed beyond their limits, teens can lose perspective on their own busyness. That's why your sensitivity to his state is crucial to healing.
First, assist him in evaluating his life. Simply reviewing his schedule may help illustrate that a problem exists. Then ask him about — and observe personally — sleeping patterns, study habits, relational demands, etc. Once you agree a problem exists, you can begin to develop solutions together.
In his "burned out" condition, it would be natural for conflicts to bubble up. If issues surface here, deal with them before trying to pull him out of the more general rut of burnout. Then brainstorm some options for healthier overall balance. Can he cut back on work? Adjust class schedules? Delay a project? Get some help with relational issues? Be sure to reserve time for fun, relaxation and "recharging the batteries" so to speak.
This process should develop a sense of hope and direction in your teen, as well as accountability. Monitor and encourage him, but also make him responsible for following through on the changes discussed. If you don't see improvement, it may be time to consult a professional counselor (or your family physician to rule out medical problems).
As a caring parent, you can lift your teen out of the burnout ditch by
Q. As a youth pastor, I see many teens who are stressed out from being too busy. Is there a way I can help them?
A. Sure. First, plan a "Stress Release Weekend." No schedule. No agenda. Pick a relaxing place and simple meals. The ultimate goal is to "detox" from the pressures of daily life.
Second, plan a "Day Alone with God" at a retreat center, park, lake — any place where the teens can spread out, have privacy and avoid distraction. (You may want to get each teen a copy of How to Spend a Day In Prayer by Lorne Sanny.) The focus of this time is not to keep busy praying. Rather, use that dialogue (which includes quietly listening to God) as a way of slowing down and regaining perspective on life.
Finally, be sensitive to the amount of youth group responsibility you assign to any one teen. It's easy to overload a reliable youngster without realizing it — simply because you know you can count on them to do the job right. You can lighten the load.


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Second-ranked South Carolina and 20th ranked Tennessee's baseball game was halted in the top of the 12th inning with the score tied at 2-2 due to rain in Columbia, S.C. The game will resume on Saturday at 4 p.m. with Saturday's originally scheduled contest to follow the conclusion of the first game.
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