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It's just boys being boys, but is it really? Monday September 26th the New York Rangers met the Philadelphia Flyers in a classic NHL rival matchup. Games between these two teams are always downright rough, but this first meeting of the pre-season seemed to have a bit more dirt than usual. I was aware only a short time into the game that Philly wasn't here for a friendly rival pre-season game, when an early boarding call was made against them. Tom Sestito racked up 20 minutes in penalties for taking a boarding penalty for his dirty hit from behind on Andre Deveaux, after which a brawl ensued. While hockey is known to be a bloody sport the league has been cracking down on high hits, and hits where the man is helpless, or without the puck, due to the massive head injuries that have plagued the league, and ended the careers of many players in the last few years.
During the first scuffle of the game, Sean Avery of the Rangers, and a huge supporter of the LGBT community, had it out on the ice with Wayne Simmonds of the Flyers. Trading punches and barbs at one another. During this exchange, it is said by Avery that Simmonds called him a "fucking faggot." Avery took some heat this past year for posting a pro same sex marriage video in his Ranger's jersey, to support the same sex marriage law that was up in New York. While the interaction was caught on video and clearly Simmonds can be seen mouthing the words, but because there was no audio, the NHL has declined to take action against Simmonds for what they call "lack of proof".
Someone who has since come out against this decision in the league is the Toronto Maple Leafs General Manager Brian Burke, father of the late Brendan Burke, a pioneer for acceptance of gays in hockey. Brian a gay man himself was a sounding board for all the things in hockey that were wrong, as far as policies and procedures that weren't in place to protect players should they choose to come out. After Brendan's death in a car accident his father Brian is carrying on his legacy. As a fan who has attended at least ten Ranger games in my life, I can attest to the fact that the use of the word faggot is thrown around quite a bit in the stands and the sport itself isn't exactly a safe haven for gays, but it's never been a threatening one either. People will mostly chalk this up to boys being boys, heat of the moment competition mentality, but other professional sport leagues have adopted rules and policies recently to protect LGBT players and fans from discrimination and hate speech. A perfect example of this is the fine of $100,000 against NBA player Kobe Bryant after his use of a gay slur on the basketball court during a game. Even the NFL has recently jumped on board and adopted new rules for the conduct of its players regarding inclusion and acceptance.
Are we seeing a softer side of professional sports? In some cases yes and unfortunately in the incident of Sean Avery, it seems the NHL just hasn't caught up yet with what most of us already know, its 2011 and I'm quite sure there are a lot of gay hockey players. Just as you would protect a black hockey player from discrimination, a gay player deserves the same safety and respect afforded all other players, both on the ice and in the locker room. Sean Avery is known to be a bit of an instigator and has gotten under the skin of many a normally calm player, but does that warrant the use of such a derogatory term? Hell no! As a huge New York Rangers fan and hockey in general, I was very offended and upset over what happened both between Sean Avery and Wayne Simmonds, and the way many of the Philadelphia Flyers conducted themselves on the ice the other night. It was a disgrace to the game and its one that has to be addressed. If we ever want to move forward and be progressive in a sport that prides itself on loyalty, teamwork and discipline then we need to address the pink elephant in the room.
For more information on this incident CLICK HERE and you can read more about Brian Burke's comments HERE.
Leisha Hailey is probably best known for her role as bisexual journalist Alice Pieszecki on Showtime's former series The L-Word. The show followed a group of close knit lesbian friends through their trials and tribulations of…well, being gay in LA. The character Alice was usually the comic relief, but she had an outspoken, stand up for what is right side to her. When reading the story of Leisha getting escorted off a Southwestern plane in an apparent homophobic incident, I couldn't help but wonder…what would Alice do? Probably the exact same thing as Leisha did.
Leisha took to her Twitter feed to vent about the incident. As I read my Facebook news feed quoting the tweets, I reserved my opinion at first. I didn't think I could have a fair opinion for not having witnessed it first hand. According to reports, Leisha and her girlfriend/Uh Huh Her band mate Camila Grey shared a kiss. Soon after, a flight attendant approached them to relay the message that they are a family airline and their behavior was unacceptable. They felt they were being discriminated against and became verbally heated with the flight attendant. This was when they were apparently escorted off.
After the dust settled a bit, Leisha and Camila issued a formal statement, which I think was brilliantly done.
They explain that they were not initially told by the flight attendant why they were being approached, just that they needed to be aware that Southwestern Airlines is a family oriented airline. This is a key factor because it implies that Leisha and Camila's type of family is not welcome on Southwestern Airlines. Or at least not welcome to show affection towards each other.
Their statement is ripe with words that show the utmost respect, compassion, and humanity that their fans know they possess. They take complete responsibility for the profane language with the flight attendant. And they are not asking anyone to boycott Southwestern, as Leisha did in her original tweets. Of course many people are taking that stance on their own. But it seems that Leisha and Camila have taken some time to assess the situation more clearly. They merely want the airline to learn from this situation. They clarify that they were in no way out of line or excessive in their affections. This may come down to how one defines "excessive" but I believe if they are specifically saying it wasn't, then it wasn't. Their kiss was probably no more than any heterosexual couple would share in a public place. If the fact that it was two women makes anyone uncomfortable, that is not for the airline to condone. I'm willing to bet that no one would notice, let alone complain, about a heterosexual couple kissing. And that is the biggest issue here. Leisha and Camila's intent is to bring awareness and promote acceptance. As the saying goes, visibility matters. And this is precisely why. Attaching a sense of normalcy to same sex couples can show people that it's not gross or weird, it's just two people showing affection for each other.
Southwest Airlines followed up with a statement saying that Leisha and Camila were escorted off for profane language. But, the fact that they got booted for profane language, not kissing, is besides the point. The kissing incident led to the discriminatory comment by the flight attendant, which led to the profane language.
The gay community has achieved great strides in the last several years. But we've also taken a few steps back. It seems as if all of the small victories have incited the opposition to become more adamant in their stance against us. Many will say that's just their right to exercise their views, as we do ours. But the difference is simple. We are striving for acceptance, equality and to live as openly honest as everyone else. They want to judge and condemn. They use veiled acceptance words like, "I'm fine with gays, I just don't want their lifestyle shoved in my face". And that means being "disgusted" when they see two men hold hands, kissing, embracing, acting too flamboyant for their liking…in other words, just being himself. Newsflash, that is not being fine with gays. That's ignorance and prejudice. No one is trying to push their lifestyle on anyone. We simply want to live OUR lives as openly as you live YOURS. That is what Leisha and Camila encountered on the Southwestern flight. The freedom to be themselves taken away by others who couldn't handle a little affection between a couple who just happened to be two women.
We'd like to thank Leisha Hailey and Camila Grey for bringing this story to light. It needs to be heard. We thank them for standing up for themselves because we know each step they take forward helps us take two. We thank them for their openness and visibility that helps those not sure feel more comfortable in their own skin. We thank them for being positive role models…because in a world full of bullies, we could use all the good we can get. Thank you.


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had to write it somewhere..
didn't joined tcs,when everybody at my home was telling to do so..just for mba..
3 shocks in less than 6 hours..
jmet--was expecting 82 got 74 and 3000 rank
xat-- ar/dm-- 30.75, va/lr--25.25, qa/di-- -1.75(negative)
iift--missed by 0.75
fms--350 no chances of a call..
only hopes now is IRMA
Just praying for two things...
1) i need a job as soon as possible..i will come back strongly next year..
2) god change these results on 12th...
if not for me, at least for UNDERDOG AND DREAM TEAM PEOPLE...I really can't believe it....
p.s-- sorry for posting on this thread......
Yup, you are right OED says same. and here I also want to clear doubt about appliance and gadget. I have installed version of OED and in "wordfinder" when you type gadget it shows one line " A kitchen full of electrical gadgets". gadget is more associated with "modern" hence we say "modern gadgets" not "modern appliances", I think TIME copy pasted that line in question paper.
really these two questions were "wolfs in sheep's clothing ".

subset: commoncrawl


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CU: Home • A to Z • Campus Map
For the second straight year, CU-Boulder is ranked No. 1 in the nation for graduates serving as Peace Corps volunteers with 112 undergraduate alumni currently serving around the world.
"Our No. 1 Peace Corps ranking for volunteer service is tangible evidence of something we have always known: our students and graduates are service-oriented and down-to-earth, working tirelessly to benefit communities around the globe," said Chancellor Philip P. DiStefano. "It emphasizes how CU-Boulder's civically engaged students go on to become service-oriented citizens at home and abroad."
Peace Corps Director Aaron S. Williams will give a short presentation at the University of Colorado Boulder on Wednesday, Jan. 25, to share stories of CU alumni who are currently serving overseas and discuss the importance of the Peace Corps in the world today.
The presentation will begin at 1:30 p.m. in Old Main Chapel and is free and open to the public.
Nominated by President Barack Obama and confirmed by the U.S. Senate in 2009, Williams is the 18th director of the Peace Corps and the fourth director to have served as a Peace Corps volunteer.
People who made New Year's resolutions to eat healthier or lose weight might also want to brush up on their math skills.
In a new study, marketing professor Donald Lichtenstein found that nutrition labels on packaged food products in the United States can lead even the most health-conscious consumers astray, if they don't "do the math."
Colorado business leaders' optimism has resumed going into the first quarter of 2012 after a dip in confidence last quarter, according to the most recent quarterly Leeds Business Confidence Index, or LBCI, released today by the University of Colorado Boulder's Leeds School of Business.
Colorado will continue on the road to recovery and add jobs in 2012 following a positive year in 2011, according to economist Richard Wobbekind of the University of Colorado Boulder's Leeds School of Business.
The University of Colorado Boulder Leeds School of Business will present its annual Colorado Business Economic Outlook Forum on Monday, Dec. 5, at 1 p.m. at the Grand Hyatt Hotel in Denver.
Consumers should take the time to prepare themselves by researching prices and quality before they hit the stores or Internet this holiday shopping season, according to University of Colorado Boulder Professor Donald Lichtenstein.
Richard Collins, professor of law at the CU-Boulder Law School, is an expert in constitutional law. He can be reached at 303-492-5493 or firstname.lastname@example.com.
Ralph Ellison spent four decades writing but never finishing a novel to follow "Invisible Man," which was a meteoric success in 1952 and remains an American classic. Ellison's unfinished second novel was published this year, and a CU-Boulder associate professor is one of two editors who brought the legendary author's work to fruition.
Corn and potato crops may soon provide information to farmers about when the plants need water and how much should be delivered, due to a CU-Boulder invention. A tiny sensor clipped to plant leaves charts their moisture content, a key measure of water deficiency and accompanying stress. Data from the leaves is sent wirelessly over the Internet to computers linked to irrigation equipment, ensuring timely watering, reducing excessive water and energy use, and potentially saving farmers millions of dollars a year.
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Kendrick professes his love for Queen Bey
Do you ever miss her? Your first love?
one thing that i'll never forget you saying to me is that "shes my first love, i dont know if i'll ever be over her" and that was when i knew. I knew that what we had would never be as special. And no matter how much I love you and everything i do for you will never mean as much as if it wouldve been your first love. Just knowing that i am deeply in love with you and to feel as though you are just tolerating me is like a knife in the middle of my soul. In my head i just think that the more i do to show you how much i care, maybe you'll just forget about her and love me like you once loved her. I envy her because of that. I am completely jealous of her because i know that she has a piece of your heart that i will never get. In a way she owns you. I believe that people are destined to be together, and maybe thats what you two are. Its been over a year and all the pictures you guys took are still on facebook, and you and i, we have none. Its like no one is even aware we are together. In the back of my mine i think you dont want to broadcast it because she might see. I feel like when you look at me, you're hoping that I was her.
But im not. I can only be me. I can only be the person that will jump through hoops just to get you to realize my feelings for you. I didnt think it was possible to want for someone else more than myself. When i refer to anything I use "us, or we" to start off my sentence. When i pray, i pray for you, i pray for us. It just hurts to get it through my head that you will never feel the same. Being someones second love, is like only getting a half of a slice of pizza. It just leaves you wanting more. I hate to know how any girl after me will feel when you wont even give her as much as youve given me.
Every blog needs this!
I always knew there was some truth behind this scene, Will's emotion felt too real for it to be scripted. & looking back at this scene & seeing him now, my goodness is that man a BEAUTIFUL father
"How come he don't want me, man?"
From what I've heard, Will Smith's father actually left him. This wasn't entirely scripted. Will went off on his own rant, and the hug at the end was genuine.
His character was just supposed to shrug off his dad leaving again and he starts to but then Will goes off script. That whole speech is coming entirely from him. The hug at the end is also genuine, actor to actor not character to character.
this whole thing makes me all shaky. will smith you're the man.
"ima blow this motherfucker up if i dont get my motherfucking change!"
DEAD!!!!!!!!! lmfao


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Farmland value projected to be flat, or decrease in 2014
While cropland values in Ohio increased in 2012 and 2013, they are expected to remain flat or even decline in 2014, an economist from Ohio State University's College of Food, Agricultural, and Environmental Sciences (CFAES) said.
Ohio cropland value rose 12 percent this year, with bare cropland averaging $5,600 an acre, said Barry Ward, production business management leader for Ohio State University Extension. OSU Extension is the outreach arm of the college.
Ward, citing statistics from the Ohio Field Office of the National Agricultural Statistics Service, said he expects the trend to remain flat or even reverse next year, with the key factors - crop profitability and interest rates – both showing indications of "unfriendly" moves in 2014. This, as crop profits are projected to be lower or possibly negative while interest rates have moved higher since last year, he said.
"Projected budgets for Ohio's primary crops for 2014 show the potential for little to no profits," Ward said. "Cash rental rates will move based on where they are in relation to the current market.
"Rents at the low end of the market may have some upside potential yet as they catch up. Rents at the high end of the market will be sticky as operators may be reluctant to ask for relief after one year of low prices for fear of losing part of their land base."
Ward spoke Nov. 25 during the college's kickoff of its 2013-2014 Agricultural Policy and Outlook series. The event initiates a series of local meetings to be held statewide through the end of the year. Dates and times for the meetings can be found at http://go.osu.edu/2014outlook.
The event featured presentations from experts from the college's Department of Agricultural, Environmental and Development Economics (AEDE), who discussed issues the food and agricultural community should expect in 2014, including policy changes and market behavior with respect to farm, food and energy resources, and the environment.
Producers and landowners may want to consider flexible cash leases as a way to manage risk of volatile crop and input markets, said Ward, who is also an AEDE assistant extension professor.
Fertilizer will continue to be the most volatile crop input cost, Ward said, noting that "cost management of this important input may be the difference in being a low cost or high cost producer."
"Fertilizer prices are lower compared to last year at this same time and many producers are asking themselves if this is the right time to buy," he said. "While it is hard to know exactly what direction and when prices will move, it is smart to keep up‐to‐date on important fertilizer products fundamentals."
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Made of high quality 304 stainless steel, the Quickveyor is one of the strongest trailers on the market. It's belt ... Read More
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heath ledger (4 april 1979 - 22 january 2008)
"I never had money, and I was very happy without it. When I die, my money's not gonna come with me. My movies will live on – for people to judge what I was as a person. I just want to stay curious."
I miss him.


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Have video you want to share of Seymour football?
Upload highlights of the team and or players here.
Daniel Hinson with a tackle on a punt fake game on 9-13-2013 against Heritage
Daniel Hinson tackle with a loss game on 9-13-2013 against Heritage
Daniel Hinson with 2 tackles game on 9-13-2013 against Heritage
Daniel Hinson with a sack and turn over game on 9-13-2013 against Heritage.
JJ Jerman - 2015 Top K/P Combo Prospect from Seymour HS, TN.This FG charting session consisted of 10 kicks total - 7 shot with continuous video from 35-50yds, and 3 more shot continuous from 50yds each. All FGs were off the ground without a block.... more
Check out the MaxPreps Top Defensive & Special Team Plays 2009
Friday 5 with Steve Montoya
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Highlights. Running Back and Corner Back #6
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Week 5 Highlights of the 2008 Football Season
07 Highlights. 61 tackles 8.5 Sacks as a Junior


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Shining Life Children's Trust
Shining Life Children's Trust
Shining Life Children's Trust (also known as Dylana Jeevanthe Children's Trust) works to improve the lives of disadvantaged children in Sri Lanka. Our focus is on the family. Through working with families and the communities in which they live we aim to build a sustainable and brighter future for the children.We believe that real and sustainable development is a process in which people change their own lives by their own efforts. To achieve this we work in partnership with local Sri Lankan organisations.Shining Life Children's Trust is staffed entirely by volunteers ensuring that over 98% of your donation goes directly to our work in Sri Lanka.
Kandy, Sri Lanka
12 Mar 2013
Opportunity has expired
International Community Development Volunteer
Are you looking for an inspiring and transformative experience in 2013? If so, then the Shining Life Volunteer Programme is the place to seize it!
Kandy, Sri Lanka
Applicants are required to hold the relevant Visas/Work Permits
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Shining Life provides the volunteers with comprehensive training and support before, during and after the placement. This is carefully designed so that all those involved in the Shining Life Volunteer Programme – the volunteers, their placement community and their own communities in the UK and Ireland– can extract maximum benefit from the programme, in accordance with the volunteers' own education, volunteering and development experiences.
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The Stan Smith Vulc takes one of the most iconic adidas sneakers and makes it skate-ready with a durable upper, recessed eyelets, and a grippy vector traction outsole. The shoes also feature a subtle drop in the EVA midsole to make them lighter and more comfortable to skate in, and they come with extra laces. This particular model boasts a white leather upper with royal blue accents at the tongue and heel tab. The adidas Stan Smith Vulc white/royal is now available at Sneaker Politics for $70 USD.
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This is what the sun looked like.
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This is what the sun looked like.
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Andrew Haigh's Weekend
2 notes
David Fincher's Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
Asghar Farhadi's A Separation (Jodaeiye Nader az Simin)
1 note
Michael Fassbender in Steve McQueen's Shame
17 notes
Makoto Togashi in Shion Sono's Guilty Of Romance (Koi no tsumi)
4 notes
Elizabeth Olsen and John Hawkes in Sean Durkin's Martha Marcy May Marlene
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Ryan Gosling and Albert Brooks in Nicolas Winding Refn's Drive
Michael Shannon in Jeff Nichol's Take Shelter
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Thomas Doret in Jean-Pierre & Luc Dardenne's Le gamin au vélo (Kid with a bike)
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I doubt they're burying any lines anywhere. This is an aerial venture from what I can tell. If they are burying any its not much.On that note I haven't seen much action either anywhere. Considering I was told the area I'm in was supposed to be strung by end of july/august its pretty disappointing. Maybe they meant 2013 hah
Yes, those flags say buried communication cable, who knows whose they are though. As I said, I expect this is just construction prep, likely for the roadwork going on along there - but as the pole in the background is a crossing-point, it's also plausible that they're running as many lines to the Lasalle CO as it can handle before building out from another location. Probably not, but since we don't know their infrastructure plan, I'll keep on hoping.
Vianet has been the one doing alot of underground work as well as some eastlink. Prob to save themselves some money from having to deal with a-holes from sudbury hydro.
Well well, while driving down ND this morning I saw a Vistacare truck stringing fibre in front of pioneer manor. What do you know, start doing other areas before completing the last area. Figures
Whoops, must correct an error - according to this post those Agilis tags are the city's fibre and Bell's are the orange ones. Which makes sense, as I tried following the blue run to see where it went, and it disappeared at a larger pole on the corner of the taxation centre's lot. If the fibreOP lines are the ones wrapped with orange where they cross the poles, then they run around the corner and down Lasalle.The truck was still in front of Pioneer Manor around 4 today, so whatever they're doing there must be a big job. Patience is thinning.
steel supporting cable was run along hawthorne today by vistcare. Starting to penetrate the adanac area.


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2014 London International Mime Festival: Fet A Ma: Cru at Southbank Centre
From to
An acrobatic duet circus-theatre piece featuring Pau Portabella and Marta Torrents, exploring man's inner fragility and vulnerability through physicality, acrobatics and humour.
Practical Information
From to
Southbank Centre
Belvedere Road, London, SE1 8XX
Adult Ticket from £17.00 (USD27.24) - View Prices
Book a taxi on +44 (0)844 556 0706 or with London's biggest car service app
Venue Details & Map
Southbank Centre
- Address
Belvedere RoadLondonSE1 8XX
- Telephone:
- 0844 847 9910
- Public transport:
- Underground and Rail Stations: Waterloo, Embankment, Charing Cross, Waterloo East. Buses stop on Waterloo Bridge, on York Road, on Belvedere Road and on Stamford Street.


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This is Why You Don't Have to Find Your Purpose
Did you know you're always living your purpose even if you feel like you haven't found it yet?
Purpose doesn't need to be discovered. Purpose just desires your Awareness.
Awareness that everything you do is part of a divine plan.


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Looking for cranks that have a 19mm spindle and 170 or 175 mm crank arm
Added a product review for Demolition Rogue Rear Hub 8/24/2014 10:59 AM
Ehh,its not the best for a intermediate rider
The Good: Light,somewhat reliable
The Bad: Axel Bolts,And Driver
I Had This For About 1 year,and not even hard riding ,then i started to advance up to being better,as i progressed i started seeing signs of it going,where i am at now with it ,the driver pawls are messed up,im riding my bike and i hear a creaking noise coming from the hub,has to be the pawls .so idk its an alright hub but i would Get Something Else Other Than This If You Go Hard On Your Bike.
This product has 12 reviews
Added reply in a thread Looking for cranks 7/8/2014 2:59 AM
Left Side Compatible ?
Added reply in a thread Looking for cranks 7/4/2014 1:17 AM
are they black ?im not looking for any spline drive
Added a new photo album My Bike 7/2/2014 1:39 AM
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Started new thread Looking for cranks 7/2/2014 1:37 AM
This forum thread has 8 replies
Started new thread Anyone Rides In Pa 6/10/2014 5:53 PM
Near Tobyhanna,Long Pond,Mt Pocono,Stroudsberg? etc? need new riding buddies
This forum thread has 2 replies
Added reply in a thread Who's riding in Pennsylvania and/or new jersey 6/10/2014 5:52 PM
Live Near Mount Pocono
Added reply in a thread Building a new Wheel 6/10/2014 5:39 PM
I Could Get it 27 Bucks Cheaper On Danscomp
Started new thread Building a new Wheel 6/10/2014 2:36 PM
So Im getting a Demolition Bulimia V2 Front Hub And A Demolition Zero Rim,What Spokes Should I get Laced To it,And Why ? I Was thinking of getting titanium spokes..
This forum thread has 5 replies
Updated bike check Fully Custom Eastern 6/10/2014 2:24 PM
Updated bike check Fully Custom Eastern 6/10/2014 2:24 PM
Updated bike check Fully Custom Eastern 1/6/2014 12:01 AM
Updated bike check Fully Custom Eastern 1/6/2014 12:01 AM
Updated bike check Fully Custom Eastern 12/6/2013 12:36 AM
Added a new video 180 11/24/2013 8:32 PM
This Was My First 180 that was caught on camera
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Added a comment to justin.martin.545's bike check 11/24/2013 6:47 PM
Mad Clean
This setup has 5 comments.


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Ready to Depart at SVMI
Turning into M16 towards runway 36L for the flight to Caracas.
Arrival from Maiquetía
With more than five hours delayed, this former Air Europa´s A-340 is taxing slowly to the T-1 terminal just arrived from Damascus and almost ready to continue its flight to Caracas. I hope to see ... (more)
Charter flight from Venezuela.
Dedicated to my friend Juan De Gouveia Blanco for his help.


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Nike Hyperdunk+2012 Sport Pack Premium Men's Basketball Shoes
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Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow! Go to shows! Go to shows! Go to shows! OK, so one of those makes the other a bit difficult, but we know you have it in you. Grab a shovel, some snow boots, whatever it takes to make way for some great music this week (plus, we hear the forecast is beginning to ... More >>
Editor's Note: The end of 2012 is upon us, so we thought we'd put a cap on things by sharing some of our personal favorite shows, albums, events and general shenanigans. Join us as we indulge in some navel-gazing! Despite what you may presume from the headline, I don't intend for this to be an "Oh ... More >>
8 p.m. Thursday, December 13. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Avenue.
And now a Public Service Announcement from RFT Music: It's wintertime, folks, and you know what that means: It's cold! And as we all know, in the cold, everything dies. The trees, the bugs, at least one ill-prepared bird I found in my side yard -- and most important for the purposes of this post: t ... More >>
Well I don't know about you, but I was certainly not impressed by so-called "Tropical Storm" Isaac. Yeah, it rained a little, but the way people were talking about it made it seem like we would all be awash over the weekend -- my neighbor even asked me on Friday if I had enough groceries and batteri ... More >>
9 p.m. Thursday, August 16. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Avenue.
You can actually comfortably go outside today! The temperatures are supposed to be in the 80s. It's been so damn oppressively damn hot this whole damn summer that this respite, however brief, is newsworthy on even a music blog. My massively overtaxed air conditioner is assuredly on its last leg, but ... More >>
9 p.m. Friday, February 12. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Avenue.
Friday, March 27 *Crocodiles, Cafe Ventana *Umphrey's McGee/The Uglysuit, Pageant *Raven Moon, Focal Point *Tok, Schlafly Tap Room *Strawfoot, Deluxe *The Feed/Funky Butt Brass Band, The Gramophone *Wiley and the Checkmates, Beale on Broadway *Dogtown Allstars, Broadway Oyster Bar *Doogie Armstrong, ... More >>
9 p.m. Saturday, March 28. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Avenue.
Here are some of the new shows announced this week at venues around St. Louis! Pops * The AP Tour featuring Family Force 5/The Maine/3OH!3, Wednesday, April 15 Family Arena * Avenged Sevenfold/Buckcherry/Papa Roach/Saving Abel, Tuesday, February 17 Scottrade Center *Billy Joel and Elton John, ... More >>
Bobby Bare Jr. covers up with his ace Pixies and Breeders tribute act.
Tuesday, April 18, at 9 p.m. Blueberry Hill's Duck Room (6504 Delmar Boulevard, University City)
A little comic, a little poetic, totally Clem Snide
Reconstruction Site (Epitaph)
Cronyism! Nepotism! Backstabbing! Secrecy! So that's why they call it "community radio"!
Saturday, August 9; Off Broadway
spinART proves that little labels aren't necessarily doomed
William S. Burroughs


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Recs lunch or early dinner near San Mateo Fairgrounds
- c
- chocolatetartguy Oct 19, 2006 01:12 AM
If no one has any suggestions, we'll just go to Val's for burgers on the way home. We could do worse, but can you do better?
Go to Shanghai East on 25th at El Camino and get some xiao long bao.
Earlier post: http://www.chowhound.com/topics/show/...
Taxi's Hamburgers, El Camino Real and 29th?, San Mateo
Crepevine, Burlingame Ave between Primrose and Park, Burlingame
Steelhead Brewery, Lorton Ave (off Burlingame Ave), Burlingame
Jeffrey's Hamburgers, 2nd and B, downtown San Mateo
plus tons of other ethnic (Chinese, Japanese, Thai, Mexican, Peruvian, etc etc) on B Street in downtown SM between 1st and 4th.
re: Eugene Park
Any kind of recommendations would be appreciated. Will be at an antique show all day and will be ready to eat.
For old-fashioned Italian, just on the other (west) side of El Camino is Luceti's with good quality food and full bar. Warm, casual ambience.
If the antique show leaves you famished, you must try Pancho Villa Taqueria in downtown San Mateo. Drive north on Delaware Ave., left on 4th Ave., right on B Street. It's the second storefront on the right.
My husband and I call this place "our second kitchen". They serve up delicious, filling burritos and dinner plates for cheap. We're there at least twice a week.


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Food is comfort. We make it easy for you to enjoy a delicious meal without even leaving the hotel. Whether you are into health food, snacks, or gourmet food all the way, we've got something to tickle your palate. Stay in and use our in-room dining service, check out the onsite restaurant, or unwind with after-dinner drinks at the bar.
Join us for dinner and enjoy the excitement of Japanese cuisine at the Sakura Restaurant and fresh Sushi Bar. The restaurant opens at 4PM with sushi service and the Teppanyaki dining area opens at 5PM. Sakura Flagstaff Sushi offers one of the most unique dining experiences in Flagstaff and has been voted one of the 'Best Restaurants of the Southwest" by Food and Wine Magazine. At Flagstaff's original Sushi Bar, you can sit and watch the highly trained chefs produce incredible works of edible art. Or sit at a Teppan table for lunch or dinner and watch amazed as our talented chefs dazzle you demonstrating the fine art of Teppan Style cooking. Ask them to do "The Ring of Fire!"
*Please note that we are only open for dinner; however, contact the hotel in advance if you are interested in booking a party of 10 or more for lunch.
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Enjoy breakfast, lunch and dinner at the Woodlands Café. The open atrium-style restaurant is sunny and bright, perfect for a casual dining experience in a relaxed atmosphere. Menu items range from classic breakfast omelets to a variety of sandwiches to crispy salads - or maybe you prefer a juicy steak. Whatever your taste, you'll always have an excellent meal at the Woodlands Café. With such a variety, you can see why the Woodlands Hotel is top rated when it comes to great dining in Flagstaff, AZ.
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Finding Treatment Category Archive
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Addiction Treatment: How Can We Make Things Better? A Q&A with Maia Szalavitz, Part IV
Thursday, April 25th, 2013
When it comes to addiction treatment, too often there is a disconnect between what people with an addiction need â and what they get. Combine that with the stigma, desperation and fear that accompany the disease of addiction, time and again, present seemingly insurmountable odds for the addicted person to overcome. In this, the final installment in a four-part series of my Q&A with award-winning journalist Maia Szalavitz, Ms. Szalavitz weighs in on âAddiction Treatment: How Can We Make Things Better?â
JERRY OTERO: Most of the media stories about addiction are often tied to something sensational, like a celebrity death. What will motivate journalists to pay more attention to this issue and, in turn, create more awareness and education among their readers/viewers? What kinds of stories would you like to see?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: Hard to say how to get more attention to this (if I knew how, Iâd do it!), but I would like to see reporters who cover this area question their own ingrained beliefs and not just assume that traditional treatment is the only way to recovery, that police are any kind of experts on the effects of drugs, that treatment providers are impartial experts (use academic sources who know the data; you wouldnât go to a pharmaceutical company for unbiased perspective on its own products) or that current policies are the most effective way to deal with problem.
JERRY OTERO: What's your biggest wish for change in the addictions field?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: That addiction be seen as a health problem and truly treated that way, with evidence-based treatment in which the traditional harsh approach would be as unacceptable as it would be for doctors to treat cancer patients as immoral malingerers.
JERRY OTERO: Anything parents can do to bring about this change?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: Advocate for evidence-based treatment and policy change that recognizes that addiction problems cannot be solved by the criminal justice system and treat people with addiction with compassion.
This concludes our Q&A with Maia Szalavitz. I want to thank Ms. Szalavitz for sharing her insights with our readers, and for weighing in on topics that are important for parents and other caregivers.
Are you a parent or caregiver of a teen or young adult struggling with a substance abuse problem? Please visit the online community at The Partnership at Drugfree.org's Time To Get Help.
Maia Szalavitz is a health writer at TIME.com and writes about addiction-related issues for The Fix.com . Find her on Twitter at @maiasz. She is co-author of Born for Love: Why Empathy is Essential â and Endangered, (Morrow, 2010), The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog and Other Stories from a Child Psychiatristâs Notebook: What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love and Healing (Basic, 2007), and Recovery Options: The Complete Guide: How You and Your Loved Ones Can Understand and Treat Alcohol and Other Drug Problems (John S. Wiley, 2000) and the author of Help at Any Cost: How the Troubled-Teen Industry Cons Parents and Hurts Kids (Riverhead, 2006).
Posted by Jerry / Filed under Addiction, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Drugs, Finding Treatment, Substance Abuse, Treatment, Writing About Addiction / Comments: 1
Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
Opioids (heroin and prescription pain relievers) are powerful drugs that act on specific receptors in the brain that are important in regulating pain. While prescription opioids can be highly beneficial if used as prescribed, as a class of drug, they have a high potential for abuse. In fact, the National Institute on Drug Abuse estimated that 1.9 million people in the U.S. were addicted to prescription opioid pain relievers in 2010 and 359,000 were addicted to heroin.
Medication-assisted treatment for opiate dependence generally refers to the use of the medications buprenorphine, methadone or naltrexone to treat opiate dependence, in combination with counseling and recovery support services. Â
In this, Part 3 of a 4-part series of my Q&A with award winning journalist Maia Szalavitz, Ms. Szalavitz shares her views on the dominance and effectiveness of traditional AA/12 Step based rehab programs, as well as the changes she has seen in the addiction field with a special emphasis on medication-assisted treatment for those struggling with opioid dependency.
JERRY OTERO: Whatâs been the biggest change in the addictions and treatment field since your book, Recovery Options publication in 2000? What are the implications for teenagers?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: The biggest change is the widespread use of buprenorphine for opioid addiction treatment and the acceptance of the need for maintenance medication in some cases by abstinence-focused providers like Hazelden. There has also been a decline in harsh and confrontational treatment, but unfortunately, some is still out there.
I wish there had been more changes though:Â itâs still hard to get care that doesnât present the idea that the 12-steps are the best way and that really meets peopleâs needs.
Teen treatment is unfortunately still very problematic, particularly in programs that sell themselves as âtroubled teenâ programs, i.e., emotional growth boarding schools, boot camps, therapeutic boarding schools, behavior modification programs and wilderness programs. None of these have any controlled evidence supporting their effectiveness for addictions or other teen drug problems and yet lots of teens with drug problems are sent to them. These programs tend to use tough, harsh tactics that are known to be harmful.
JERRY OTERO: What are your thoughts on medicated-assisted treatment (such as methadone, suboxone, vivitrol) for patients with opioid addictions? What are things parents should know about this treatment for their older teens/young adults?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: For opioid addiction, medication-assisted treatment is the safest and best option, the one most likely to preserve life and health. Itâs trickiest to determine when it should be used with young people: obviously, itâs preferable not to have to be on lifelong maintenance of anything, whether blood pressure medication or buprenorphine. So, young people should be aiming for abstinence at first, but maintenance should not be ruled out or seen as failure and parents should not pressure kids who are doing well on maintenance to come off, simply because they feel that drug-free is better.
Stay tuned next week for Part lV of our Q&A âHow Can We Makes Things Better?â
To learn more about prescription medicine abuse, please visit The Partnership at Drugfree.org's The Medicine Abuse Project.
And look for The Partnership at Drugfree.orgâs free Medication-Assisted Treatment e-book coming out next month.
Maia Szalavitz is a health writer at TIME.com and writes about addiction-related issues for The Fix.com. Find her on Twitter at @maiasz. She is co-author of Born for Love: Why Empathy is Essential â and Endangered, (Morrow, 2010), The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog and Other Stories from a Child Psychiatristâs Notebook: What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love and Healing (Basic, 2007), and Recovery Options: The Complete Guide: How You and Your Loved Ones Can Understand and Treat Alcohol and Other Drug Problems (John S. Wiley, 2000) and the author of Help at Any Cost: How the Troubled-Teen Industry Cons Parents and Hurts Kids (Riverhead, 2006).
Posted by Jerry / Filed under 12-Step, Addiction, Books about addiction, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Finding Treatment, getting help, Heroin, Medication-Assisted Treatment, Substance Abuse, Treatment, Twelve Step, Uncategorized, Writing About Addiction / Comments: more
Tuesday, April 9th, 2013
JERRY OTERO: What do parents need to know about the differences between girls and boys when dealing with substance abuse issues?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: Mainly that everyone has individual needs and some of them relate to gender, like the fact that girls may be more likely to be depressed or that they may feel uncomfortable discussing issues of sexuality in mixed gender groups. Mostly, itâs critical for everyone to be thoroughly evaluated before treatment is sought so that an independent assessment of these needs can be done by someone who doesnât have a particular treatment in mind. Note: independent assessment should be done by a psychiatrist or psychologist, not an educational consultant who refers people to residential care.
JERRY OTERO: What should parents be cautious of when looking for the right treatment for their child? What about programs that "whip kids into shape?" And, is there a difference between boot camps and wilderness programs?
MAIA SZALAVITZ: Any treatment that wants to cut off or control communication between parent and child (outside of obvious abusive parents) for longer than a week or two should be viewed with extreme skepticism. There is no therapeutic reason for this: love and support from family help treatment, they do not hinder it.
Any program that tells parents to expect bizarre complaints or reports of abuse and ignore them should be avoided. A program that goes on about children being manipulative liars is not safe because health complaints will be ignored and this can and has been deadly.
Programs that require 12-step work for teensâ admissions of addiction and powerlessnessâ are not the best; programs which suggest and support them are fine.
Programs that use physical punishment or restraint or isolation should be avoided; you canât whip someone with heart disease into a cure, nor can you do this with addiction.
Wilderness programs are different from boot camps in that the harsh treatment takes place in the woods or wilds rather than in a more military style but both have had serious abuses and there is no evidence supporting the idea that they are better than safer alternatives. If a child likes the woods, a voluntary Outward Bound program may be healing, but forcing someone into camping and hiking isnât addiction treatment. If a child goes to a wilderness camp for normal teens, he also will be believed when he has a health complaint â but in âtroubled teenâ programs the complaints are dismissed so callously that it has lead to dozens of deaths. Theyâre also either unregulated or not well regulated.
JERRY OTERO: Thank you so much, for your insights, Maia.
Readers, for more information about adolescent and young-adult alcohol and other drug abuse treatment and how to find the most appropriate care for your child and family, download The Partnership at Drugfree.org's Treatment e-book. This e-book will provide helpful and realistic information and advice to aid you in steering your child â and your family â toward recovery. Here, you will learn what alcohol and drug abuse treatment is, how to find the right type of treatment for your child, how to pay for treatment and the importance of taking care of yourself and your family.
Stay tuned next week for Part III of our Q&AâChanges in the Field, including Medication-Assisted Treatementâ
Maia Szalavitz is a health writer at TIME.com and writes about addiction-related issues for The Fix.com . Find her on Twitter at @maiasz. She is co-author of Born for Love: Why Empathy is Essential â and Endangered, (Morrow, 2010), The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog and Other Stories from a Child Psychiatristâs Notebook: What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love and Healing (Basic, 2007), and Recovery Options: The Complete Guide: How You and Your Loved Ones Can Understand and Treat Alcohol and Other Drug Problems (John S. Wiley, 2000) and the author of Help at Any Cost: How the Troubled-Teen Industry Cons Parents and Hurts Kids (Riverhead, 2006).
Posted by Jerry / Filed under 12-Step, Addiction, Assessment, Finding Treatment, getting help, Treatment, Uncategorized / Comments: more
Friday, February 15th, 2013
Like so many, my family has been touched by addiction. Our heads constantly spun for years as we tried to find the way to fix the addicts we love so dearly. Cuisinart-head is a term borrowed from a family addictions consultant â it perfectly described my momâs mentality in the midst of my brother Chrisâs addiction. Her head swirled with the familiar stew of questions parents of addicts will know all too well:
Meds. Rehabs. The detox world tour. How can a mother desperate to help her son possibly make sense of all of this? Well, Mom tried. A discussion with one person would lead to another contact, and mom filled five notebooks with information. Chris may have gone through 12 facilities, but mom kept extensive notes on 25. She logged the 30 medications he was on over seven years and their associated side effects, along with notes from 28 providers she trusted. She called on any resource â published authors, researchers, psychiatrists, parents of other addicted children.
Mom was the super-case manager, addicted to Chrisâs addiction and the quest to find the right program, therapist, coach, approach that would save him. And Chris stood still, waiting for the next placement, or professional to meet with, seemingly unaware or unimpressed by Momâs frantic efforts to keep him alive. We want to expect different behavior from an addict in response to an outpouring of loving effort, but those who have experienced this ride know that that rarely happens. Cuisinart-head canât move an unwilling addict.
Addiction often causes this dynamic â a family consumed with information and plans for the addict and the addict unwilling/uninterested/unmotivated to change his or her behavior. For mom, research distracted her from her anger toward Chris, disappointment in his choices and frustration that he couldnât just âstop using and return toward a normal life.â Instead of confronting uncomfortable emotions, it was easier to obsess over how to solve the problem. This thought stew can become at least a coping mechanism if not an outright addiction unto itself.
Sadly but unsurprisingly, Momâs mental âspinningâ didnât solve Chrisâs addiction. It made her feel as though she was âdoing something,â and it did generate options but also created a lot of anxiety and second-guessing. Momâs hyper-focus on the details obscured the real loss she mourned: her dreams for her sonâs future. But we now know that distress over a loved one's future as a non-addict can consume the familyâs present with little result.
Thankfully, our story has a happy ending, and my brother is leading a productive, happy life in recovery.
Families often ask âWhat did it?â and the truth is there are probably a lot of factors â Chris was older, âsick and tired of being sick and tired,â financial support was cut off, his last treatment center was a good match with a strong young personâs AA community and focus on yoga and meditation.
Mom no longer spends her time in Cuisinart-head spells trying to fix him. A couple of years into the madness, my mom stepped back and realized this process could continue for years and went into individual therapy. She had a place with an impartial observer to share her fears for Chrisâ future, discuss her anger toward him and relay her concerns for my fatherâs health, which had been impacted throughout Chrisâ journey. Â My momâs therapist gave her the confidence to remain clear-headed in crisis and helped her manage her emotions in a healthy way, which improved her interactions with Chris and thoughts related to his care.
For those who struggle with Cuisinart-head now, I would encourage you to prioritize your physical and emotional health. My momâs research and calls werenât incorrect actions, but in isolation, they created an unhealthy obsession and belief that she could fix Chrisâ addiction by finding the perfect option for him. In her case, a therapist was able to provide guidance and a space for her to discuss what happens if none of her efforts worked.
I hope that you can find some hope in our story and that you call on resources in your local area. Share your story below, talk with a therapist or coach, attend Al-Anon or another peer support group, call The Partnership at Drugfree.org toll-free Parent Helpline (1-855-DRUGFREE) â seek out guidance from others to stop the spinning.
Posted by Arden O'Connor / Filed under Addiction, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Family members, Family Therapy, Finding Treatment, getting help, parenting, Patience, Recovery, Uncategorized / Comments: more
Monday, January 28th, 2013
Earlier this month a few of us attended a Lunch ânâ Learn event at CASAColumbia with Maia Szalavitz, a neuroscience journalist who covers health, science and public policy. She discussed the theme of her book, Help at Any Cost: How the Troubled-Teen Industry Cons Parents and Hurts Kids (Riverhead, 2006), an exposé of the âtough loveâ business.
The talk prompted us to revisit and share what we at The Partnership at Drugfree.org know about boot camps and wilderness programs for troubled and/or addicted teens.
First, it is important to note that boot camps and wilderness programs are not included among the levels of care defined by the American Society of Addiction Medicine. Although you may have heard success stories or read about the benefits of boot camps, we strongly suggest you look very carefully into any boot camp or wilderness program before sending your teen for substance abuse treatment.
According to a government report, these programs are not subjected to federal oversight, and there have been thousands of reports of neglect and abuse at privately owned and operated boot camps and wilderness programs for troubled youth.
Ms. Szalavitz explained that a person with the disease of addiction is already in a lot of pain. To get better, that person doesn't need more pain and abuse, but rather a kind and supportive approach to treatment. One that's comprehensive, respectfully addressing the individual's physical, emotional and social issues. One that makes the person feel better.
We suggest that if you are seriously considering a boot camp or wilderness program, you check with the Better Business Bureau for any complaints against the program. You should also call the program and ask a lot of questions, including:
1) What specific substance abuse and mental health licensing and accreditation does the program have? (If the providers are not licensed, do NOT send your child to the program.)
Remember, addiction is a serious health issue and requires appropriate treatment by licensed professionals so that addicted persons can learn how to manage drug and alcohol problems, how to handle relapse and how to live a life free of drugs and alcohol.
For more questions to ask programs when looking for treatment for your child, here are some helpful resources:
To find the best assistance option for your child with an alcohol or drug problem, see our Treatment e-book.
To connect with other parents about your childâs drug and alcohol problem, join our online support community at TimeToGetHelp.drugfree.org.
To speak to a trained specialist, call our toll-free helpline at 1-855-DRUGFREE (1-855-378-4373).
Have you sent or considered sending your child to a boot camp or wilderness program? Comment below to share your thoughts or experiences.
Posted by Intervene Staff / Filed under Addiction, Books about addiction, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Finding Treatment, parenting, Scare tactics, tough love, Treatment, Uncategorized / Comments: more
Wednesday, May 2nd, 2012
Our libraries and book stores are filled with books on addiction and treatment centers have materialized in cities across the globe; addiction has touched the lives of most people.
Therapistsâ phones are ringing off the hook because addiction is causing incredible pain in many families across the nation. Books, treatment centers and doctors all have a role to play in the process of recovery. The disheartening truth is that all the education in the world will not eliminate the obsession of the user. Self knowledge alone will not keep us clean nor will it help the family member to find solace in their quest for healing.
However, most these avenues of treatment will introduce the client to the 12-Step programs. In my first blog I talked about the programs of Alanon and Naranon. These programs are essential for family members and friends of the addict. I want to emphasize to parents the importance of embracing the 12-Steps into your own lives.
Intervention and rehab centers are important components in the treatment of addiction and can be important stepping stones in the pursuit of finding freedom from addiction, but they do not equal recovery. They are external support systems; the steps will be the channel to internalize this important information. There is a saying in the 12-Step arena that the therapeutic value of one addict helping another is without parallel.
Today, there are hundreds of 12-Step programs based on the original 12-Step concept launched by Alcoholics Anonymous in 1935. The steps are basically the same for each of these programs, except for the first step, which begins with, âWe are powerless overâ¦.â
You can fill in the blank with âdrugs,â âalcohol,â âfood,â âgambling,â etc. I use the word âaddictionâ when referring to this step, because it encompasses all unhealthy obsessions.
The experience of working and living the steps can be as varied as those seeking recovery, and belief in a theistic god or God Itself is not a requirement. Spiritual principles work for the agnostic as well as atheist. The process simply asks us to believe in something, some Higher Power that we will be willing to let guide us on this journey of healing.
Sponsorship is highly suggested in all 12-Step programs. When asking someone to be your sponsor, you look for someone who reflects in life what you are seeking. This person will guide you through the step processâsomeone you can call in a time of confusion, someone who you trust spiritually.
Each of the steps contains certain spiritual principles. Some 12-Step literature emphasizes the HOW of the program. This acronym refers to three basic principles: Honesty, Open-mindedness, and Willingness. There is a deliberate order and harmony in the way that each principle is placed, practiced, and ultimately lived within the 12-Step process. As we work these steps, our lives begin to change. We are transformed by these principles from the âinside out,â and as our spirits heal and grow our material lives are positively changed.
The serenity that is spoken of so highly in 12-Step fellowships flows outward, attracting others who seek it out. We write out each step, identifying what the step means to us and how it applies to our lives today. This process is like when a Zen master gives his student a Koan to figure out, and solve in their life. The most famous example of these playful, mystical riddles would surely be, âWhat is the sound of one hand clapping?â The student then meditates on this phrase (or step) to come up with what this means personally and spiritually in their present life.
Since our spiritual journey involves constant change, we continue to grow by working the steps over and over again, each time on a different issue and at a deeper level. The journey of the steps mirrors our lives, and their meanings change with us over time. The principles that occur as we work and live the steps are quite simply directions. Like points on a compass, they tell us where to go, directing our lives into a place of wholeness and fulfillment. I believe this profound personality change has to be ongoing. To assure our transformation continues, I suggest to the people I sponsor to keep their practice of the steps ongoing. The steps save our lives, and then they change our lives. We, in turn, show the next person how we did it. Ideally, this process of spiritual growth never ends.
When addiction enters our lives, either through our own use or that of a family member, it can cause enormous confusion and pain and turn life as we know it upside down. The spiritual path of the 12-Steps is not always easy, but the willingness to practice the steps will begin to soften our attitude toward addiction. Compassion and understanding will begin to fill the void that anger and resentment used to occupy.
As we begin to witness our lives and those around us change, we come to see that our greatest challenges are often the introduction to a deeper compassion, engendering our view of life with a new sense of vision.
Posted by Tom Catton / Filed under Acceptance, Addiction, Finding Treatment, Hope, Recovery, Self-reflection, Taking Care of Yourself, Treatment / Comments: more
Monday, March 26th, 2012
âIâm Tom, a grateful recovering addict.â
I have identified myself in this way in meetings and conventions for over 40 years. My intention is to put a new interpretation on the insidious disease of addiction. We all know the nightmares that accompany addiction. I invite you to move beyond the traditional ways addiction is looked upon, revealing the seemingly hopeless disease of addiction as an enlightening dilemma. I hope to introduce you to the revolutionary belief that for some individuals a life fraught with sickening addiction can quite possibly become a misunderstood gift and a blessing in disguise.
Currently there are countless studies and books written on the field of addiction and the vast and growing research on what is now termed âaddictionology.â Though it is a fascinating area of contemporary and compassion-based health care, it is also encompassed within the realm of clinical rehabilitation centers, some of which are rife with discouraging statistics and sterile data. I speak from my heart and own experience. Â I was once a hopeless addict whose life has been interrupted by a Higher Power. Â My life was transformed by surrendering to the principles of The 12-Steps, which has led to a life that is devoted to the practice of meditation and service to others.
Addiction touches everyone. When an individual, his or her family member, or a close friend struggles with the malady, it eventually affects the lives of every member of society. In every country around the world, people have found a way out of their addiction. On a daily basis there are millions of people attending 12-Step meetings in almost every country on this planet. Be assured you are not alone.
The idea that the disease of addiction can only be treated by a spiritual transformation has been the motivating idea from the beginning. In the early 1930s, a hopeless alcoholic sought help from Carl Jung, a well known psychiatrist. The patient had resigned himself to the tormented reality that he suffered from the chronic inability to stop drinking. In those days, such people often ended up in jail or a mental institution and many lost everything that had been dear to them, including family, friends, careers and ultimately life itself. Addiction was viewed as a lapse in morality and had not yet been recognized as a medical disease.
This man came to Dr. Jung and asked for help. The psychiatrist frankly told him that although he was unable to help him, he hadâon a few rare occasionsâseen someone in the grips of alcoholism go through a profound personality change brought on by an intense spiritual experience. This visit to Dr. Jung set the foundation for other drunks to stay sober by helping each other and in turn practicing the spiritually-driven 12-Steps of recovery. The steps were designed to achieve the ongoing spiritual experiences that brought on the deep personality changes in our lives. One could argue that the steps were âgivenâ to addicts by a higher spiritual realm, and Jung was as much a conduit as a cornerstone for the recovery movement. In his later years, Jung would be asked if he believed in God. Without hesitation Jung answered, âI know there is a God.â Yet the experience of working and living the steps can be as varied as those seeking recovery, and belief in a theistic god or God Itself is not a requirement. Spiritual principles work for the agnostic as well as atheist. The process simply asks us to believe in something, some Higher Power that we will be willing to let guide us on this journey of healing.
I would not dismiss anyoneâs pain caused by the disease of addiction. Â If you are a family member or a close friend, let the experience be a calling card for your own spiritual practice. The programs of Alanon and Naranon can be your refuge, a sanctuary where you find understanding. Â You may suddenly realize youâre not alone in this pain. This can be the beginning of a great adventure within, bringing to your attention that addiction is just one of many countless challenges we are called upon to face in life.
Kahil Gibran put it so eloquently in his book, âThe Prophetâ: Â âYour Children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Lifeâs longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you yet they belong not to you.â
Gibran was speaking the language of Alanon and Naranon long before their inception. Â We must learn to detach and to love unconditionally. Once we start practicing spiritual principles we learn we canât manipulate life to fit the conditions we believe will ensure our happiness. Instead we tend to each moment without judgment or criticism; acceptance of what is becomes our offering.
The 12-Step programs have been proclaimed as one of the most powerful spiritual movements of the twentieth century. Â These programs provide support and guidance to offer hope where all hope was lost. Â May loving kindness fill your hearts.
Posted by Tom Catton / Filed under Acceptance, Addiction, Finding Treatment, Forgiveness, Recovery, Self-reflection, Taking Care of Yourself, Treatment / Comments: more
Wednesday, November 9th, 2011
When someone â including a teenager â gets treatment for alcohol and substance abuse, it is standard practice to identify some of the reasons why they started using and the benefits they feel they get from these substances.  This helps them reduce shame and best identify their triggers and areas to focus on. Among the research, most reasons for using alcohol fall into a few broad categories such as mood or personality enhancement, social reasons, and coping reasons. Reviewing personal motivations for using alcohol is often an âah-haâ experience for the person seeking help but it needs to be handled with care as there is the potential in such a discussion to make alcohol use seem more appealing.
Nowhere is this concern greater than when attempting to prevent alcohol use in teens as many parents have a justified fear that such a discussion will promote alcohol use in kids who may not have otherwise been aware of the potential short-term âbenefitsâ of alcohol. This fear has often caused parents and caregivers to avoid the topic, focus only on the consequences of drinking or minimize the reasons why people drink â especially with younger children. While reinforcing the consequences of underage drinking is always recommended, understanding teenâs motivations can also be useful to parents as a point for both prevention and early intervention of teenage drinking. Below are a few tips on using teen motivations to intervene and connect with your children.
A useful strategy is to ask teens about what they âexpectâ to get from drinking. Along with perceived risk, your teenâs alcohol use can be predicted by the expectation that one will feel a certain way when they drink. These expectations are reinforced by the media and by your teenâs peers. Expectations are essentially motivating (I want to relax and I will drink because I expect that it will help me relax). The first step is to identify what your teens think about drinkingâs benefits or what drinking may give them. If you can identify the reasons they think people drink (or they drink), it is a point of intervention.
Tailor Your Strategy: Based on the motivations or expectations your teen mentions reports there are several options to continue the conversation.
1. Â Identify myths about the effects of alcohol: Teens may think that alcohol will help them achieve a particular outcome when in fact the opposite is true in the research. For example, if a teen says he drinks to relax, you can counter that alcohol only has temporary relaxing qualities (and only in moderation) and drinking actually reduces sleep quality which then causes stress. When teens understand that alcohol in fact may not actually give them what they want â they might think twice about drinking for a specific reason.
2. Once you have identified your childâs reason for drinking, encourage him or her to find other activities that will achieve the same outcome without alcohol. This is called âcounter conditioning.â So using the above example you can identify other ways that are significantly more effective than alcohol in helping them relax (e.g. exercise, music, yoga). This is important because you will be teaching your teen a valuable coping skill that might prevent them from developing problems later on in life.
3. Lastly, point out that much of the âeffectâ they get from alcohol is simply based on what they expect they will get when they drink. This is especially effective for the âI want to have funâ motivation. My favorite way to talk about this is to discuss the numerous experiments done on placebo alcohol â yes â thatâs right, studies where there was fake beer or tonic water alone and people thought it was actual alcohol. Individuals in these studies reported everything from being more social/sexual to being more confident to even having memory loss. In other words â you get what you expect. So simply being primed and thinking positively will give you what you need without the alcohol. These results are not unique to alcohol either â the placebo effect whether it be through fake surgery or a pill is extremely powerful. Studies even show that people who receive placebos have actual changes in their brain chemistry based simply on the expectation that they are getting what they need to achieve their goals. More importantly, some studies also reveal that people taking a placebo attribute their changes to themselves and not an external substance.
What I have found when I discuss alcohol motivations with teens is that they appreciate hearing a more rounded view of drinking. Teens are smart â they understand that people drink for a reason and if we ignore the reasons for drinking we are going to lose credibility with our teens. Discussions about expectancies and motivation typically also bring up much broader discussions of internal vs. external control. When I was working with college students who were referred to me for binge or excessive drinking â I would ask them to âpretendâ they were drunk the next time they went to a party. It was a powerful experience for them to just hold a tonic water and pretend that it was a real drink. It helped them recognize the internal power they have over their actions and to feel more confident and secure. When teens begin to realize that they are in control of their actions they can begin to master the world around them to achieve their goals without a pill or drink.
Related Links:
Posted by Frederick Muench, PhD / Filed under Addiction, Confronting Teens, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Finding Treatment, getting help, parenting, Scare tactics, Substance Abuse / Comments: more
Friday, March 11th, 2011
I saw and experienced more than I was able to handle as a child. My father was an alcoholic which resulted in chaos in our family including physical and verbal abuse in my parents' marriage. By the time I was a teenager I was lonely, hurt, and angry. All of which I believe played a huge role in why I developed poor decision making skills and no self-worth I couldn't count on my father to play an active part in my life which left me with a void that I didn't know how to fill.
I was five-years-old when my parents divorced. My mother was a hard-working single mom who worked an insane amount of hours in order to support the family. This left me with a lot of unsupervised time by myself. I lacked structure and activities. I never received any encouragement to try out for sports or after school activities, and because of this, Â I never really thought that I could do it. I think that without a parent's support and encouragement it's hard for a teen to magically set up structure for themselves. Had I experienced the gentle nudges of my parents to get out there and spread my wings and try new things, I think I would have been able to learn how to build confidence, friendships, team work and good decision-making skills.
But that was not my reality. Reality was that I fell in with the wrong crowd. I made some bad choices with friends and ultimately became a follower. Since I didn't have much to keep me busy after school or on the weekends, I found myself looking for stimulation in all the wrong places. As I met more people who partied, the amount of drugs and alcohol that I had access to grew. Before I knew it, all I cared about was how I was going to get high. I blamed my mom because she was the one who was there. The drugs were finally filling the void that my parents left. I figured that one day I would grow up and put all the partying behind me. Before that could happen I found myself in a place where I couldn't stop using on my own.
My mom was angry and let me know how much I was letting her down but I didn't know how to stop and I couldn't picture my life without the drugs. I became mean and sneaky to protect my using at any cost. Ultimately, we lost all trust in each other. I was angry at her because it seemed as if, before my using inconvenienced her life, I was not important to her. She wanted so badly for me to change my behavior and I wanted so badly for our family life to have turned out differently. But neither of us knew how to fix it and I couldn't get past playing the victim.
The one thing about my mom was that she did not give up. If it wasn't for that fight in her I don't know if I would have ever gotten sober on my own. I desperately needed treatment to fight my addiction, but also to help me process all the baggage that I had been carrying around for years. Professionals were able to help us heal together. They were able to help my mom learn how to set boundaries, how to push me when I needed it, communicate with an angry teenager and become my biggest cheerleader.
We didn't take the route that most mothers and daughters take in life, but we are proof that addiction doesn't have to tear a family apart forever.
Posted by Lauren King / Filed under Addiction, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Family History, Finding Treatment, Recovery, Substance Abuse, Taking Care of Yourself, Treatment, Warning Signs / Comments: more
Wednesday, October 20th, 2010
It is difficult to recognize what acceptance is in this context. I went through this with my family for the past two decades â going back and forth about what it mean to accept that my child has a problem with drugs.
The initial reaction to drug abuse is often resistance and disgust. Parents and teens can dance a pattern of cause, effect and reaction; again and again, not realizing what they are dealing with until it is too late. In doing this, we lose opportunities for early intervention [download the Intervention e-Book]. We are too eager to believe our kidâs half-hearted contritionâs and resume the illusion of ânormalcy.â
Thatâs the trap. It is important to notice behavior in a teen and consider drug tests (Note: While home drug tests can be unreliable, having a doctor perform a drug test can be a helpful tool; Although be aware that teens find all sorts of ways to beat these tests and even professional tests can be inaccurate) to determine if a positive result should lead to intervention. If the result is oxyâs, heroin, meth, or anything like that, then, YES! Accept it and map out some solutions. And in the process, donât forget to take care of yourself.
Unfortunately, our communities offer too little assistance and are quick to toss young addicts in jail for their petty drug-related crimes. Drug addiction in anyoneâs family is a big cross to bear and helping an addict is not an easy path. Acceptance helps.
Acceptance and courage are old attributes. In life, we all get a chance to test these qualities; like the farmer watching his crops flood alongside an overflowing river. His first reaction is denial! After accepting the urgency of the condition, the farmer would build sandbag levees. That is acceptance and transformation of agony into courage and action. A parent building the levees of preparation for intervention or treatment for a teen bitten by addiction is like stepping into a vision that recovery and redemption are entirely possible. Acceptance in that context does not mean condoning drug addiction.
A parent can be tempted to believe that their child has ruined his life, but that person still needs to be accepted and feel hope. Addiction has a path of its own, and can trump what you do, so be prepared.
Have a plan without feeling a need to force it (download the Treatment e-Book). Look hard into the condition you are faced with. Be intentional, but donât try and be God. When an opportunity arises, you will be ready to take action.
Even with all the money or support in the world, it simply is not a parentâs sole responsibility to solve this problem for their child; your loved one has to choose recovery and believe they can succeed. At the end of the day, we are often left feeling powerless, but that doesnât equal âgiving upâ or ârejecting an ugly conditionâ; it is a stark recognition of what one does not control. That is what acceptance feels like.
Posted by Bill Ford / Filed under Addiction, Dealing with an Addicted Child, Denial, Finding Treatment, Recovery & Relapse, Substance Abuse, Taking Care of Yourself / Comments: more
Welcome to Intervene. We are a community of experts, parents and caring adults concerned about our teensâ alcohol and drug use and have come together to share our insights, inspiration, guidance and help.
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text:
Strike King 1/2 oz Tour Grade Spinnerbait
Product Information:
The Strike King ® 1/2 oz Tour Grade Spinnerbait uses simple materials and design at achieve success in the water. Its skirt is designed with authentic coloring, and its tail adds to its realistic swimming profile. The tandem willow blades are painted with natural coloring to imitate like-like flashes in the water. Gamakatsu ® hooks and smooth swivel blades give this spinnerbait some of the most realistic action available.
- Weight forward head to help it through heavy cover
- Painted willow blades flash natural colors
- Built with Gamakatsu ® hooks
- Spin Eze ® ball bearing swivel blades
- Perfect Skirt ™ with Magic Tails ™
- Vibra-Max ™ stainless steel wire
- Weight: 1/2 oz
- Strike King
Country of Origin: Costa RicaWeb ID: 12586649
Customer Reviews:
Rated 4.3 out of 5�by 13 reviewers.
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Rated 2 out of 5�by Tripjacks333 Blades get hung up The blade hangs up on the hook. It a smaller bottom blade May 28, 2014
Rated 5 out of 5�by Bfisher Strike King 1/2 oz Tour Grade Spinnerbait Trailer hook is good for short strikes. Good quality made to last. Strike king makes some of the best spinnerbaits out there. February 11, 2014
Rated 5 out of 5�by rbrackettj This product works well This product works well. The colors are realistic. It seems to be of good quality. September 8, 2013
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text:
Nmap Development
mailing list archives
On Mon, Sep 02, 2013 at 12:26:24PM -0400, Jaromir Koncicky wrote:
I made a patch which adds this functionality: if one resolved address fails, next one is tried.
You can find it there: https://bugzilla.redhat.com/show_bug.cgi?id=978964#c6
I am not very familiar with the code, so I'd like to consult how to do
this better. I don't think the way I made it is ideal and would like
to make it more acceptable.
Thanks for the patch.
I agree with Thomas Hozza's comments at
You can't use global state in the resolver. What you will want to do is
store all the potential addresses of the target in ncat_main.c. Then in
ncat_connect, call nsock_connect_{tcp,ssl,sctp,udp} with the first
address. Then, in connect_handler, if the connection timed out, do
another nsock_connect_{tcp,ssl,sctp,udp} on the next address.
The changes aren't trivial, and I'm also not sure they are completely
specified--for example, what should happen if a port is closed on IPv6
but open on IPv4? Is "connection refused" the same as "timed out" for
the purposes of attempting to reconnect? Suppose it does, you have a
script that relies on this behavior--then what happens if someone
manages to open the IPv6 port and intercept your connection?
David Fifield
Sent through the dev mailing list
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text:
Dr. Bruce A. Silverman, MD
Nephrology, Nephrology Specialists
- 8400 N Run Medical Dr Ste 200
Mechanicsville, VA 23116
- 3 Office Locations
- Email a Friend
- (804) 559-6980
Dr. Bruce A. Silverman has been practicing medicine for 32 years. Dr. Silverman graduated from the Virginia Commonwealth University SOM in 1982. He practices medicine in Mechanicsville, VA and 2 other locations and specializes in Nephrology. Dr. Silverman is affiliated with Parham Doctors Hospital, Bon Secours Memorial Regional Medical Center, Henrico Doctors Hospital and St Marys Hospital.
Gender: Male
Years in Practice: 32 Years
Languages Spoken: English
Medical School: Virginia Commonwealth University SOM
Graduation Date: 1982
Hospital Affiliations: Parham Doctors Hospital, Bon Secours Memorial Regional Medical Center, Henrico Doctors Hospital, St Marys Hospital
Specialties: Nephrology
*This physician has multiple office locations. See Appointments for details.
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WebMD does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See additional information.