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|This article needs additional citations for verification. (March 2014)
Illustration of Laparoscopy
|OPS-301 code
Laparoscopy (from Ancient Greek λαπάρα (lapara), meaning "flank, side", and σκοπέω (skopeo), meaning "to see") is an operation performed in the abdomen or pelvis through small incisions (usually 0.5–1.5 cm) with the aid of a camera. It can either be used to inspect and diagnose a condition or to perform surgery.
There are two types of laparoscope: (1) a telescopic rod lens system, that is usually connected to a video camera (single chip or three chip), or (2) a digital laparoscope where a miniature digital video camera is placed at the end of the laparoscope, eliminating the rod lens system. The mechanism mentioned in the second type is mainly used to improve the image quality of flexible endoscopes replacing traditional fiberscopes. Nevertheless, laparoscopes are rigid endoscopes. The rigidness is required in clinical practice. The rod lens based laparoscopes are highly dominant in practice, due to their fine optical resolution (50 µm typically, dependant on the aperture size used in the objective lens), and the image quality can be better than the digital cameras if necessary. The second type is very rare in the laparoscope market and hospitals.
The laparoscope allows doctors to perform both minor and complex surgeries with a few small cuts in the abdomen.[1]
There are a number of advantages to the patient with laparoscopic surgery versus an open procedure. These include reduced pain due to smaller incisions and hemorrhaging, and shorter recovery time.
Gynecological diagnosis[edit]
In gynecology, diagnostic laparoscopy may be used to inspect the outside of the uterus, ovaries and fallopian tubes, for example in the diagnosis of female infertility. Usually, there is one incision near the navel and a second near to the pubic hairline.[1]
For gynecological diagnosis, a special type of laparoscope can be used, called a fertiloscope. A fertiloscope is modified to make it suitable for trans-vaginal application.
A dye test may be performed to detect any blockage in the reproductive tract, wherein a dark blue dye is passed up through the cervix and is followed with the laparoscope through its passage out into the fallopian tubes to the ovaries.[1]
Pediatric laparoscopy[edit]
Although laparoscopy in adult age group is widely accepted, its use in the pediatric age group is questionable. The efficacy of laparoscopy is inferior to open surgery in situations such as pyloromyotomy for infantile hypertrophic pyloric stenosis. Although laparoscopic appendectomy results in fewer wounds than open surgery, the former is also associated with more intra-abdominal abscesses.
Tactile sensing[edit]
During a laparoscopic surgery the video camera becomes a surgeon's eyes, since the surgeon uses the image from the video camera positioned inside the patient's body to perform the procedure. Visual feedback is either similar or often superior to open procedures. The greatest limitation to these minimally invasive approaches is the impairment (in the case of traditional laparoscopy) or complete lack of tactile sensation (in the case of robotic laparoscopy) normally used to assist in surgical dissection and decision making. Despite of multiple attempts, no tactile imaging device or probe is currently commercially available for laparoscopic surgery.[2][3][4][5] Figure on the right presents one of the advanced solutions, which is in the development phase.[6]
- ^ a b c MedlinePlus > Laparoscopy Update Date: 8/21/2009. Updated by: James Lee, MD
- ^ Talasaz A, Patel RV. Integration of force reflection with tactile sensing for minimally invasive robotics-assisted tumor localization. IEEE Trans Haptics. 2013; 6(2): 217-28.
- ^ Hollenstein M1, Bugnard G, Joos R, Kropf S, Villiger P, Mazza E. Towards laparoscopic tissue aspiration. Med Image Anal. 2013; 17(8): 1037-45.
- ^ Beccani M, Di Natali C, Sliker LJ, Schoen JA, Rentschler ME, Valdastri P. Wireless tissue palpation for intraoperative detection of lumps in the soft tissue. IEEE Trans Biomed Eng. 2014; 61(2): 353-61.
- ^ Pacchierotti C, Prattichizzo D, Kuchenbecker K. Cutaneous Feedback of Fingertip Deformation and Vibration for Palpation in Robotic Surgery. IEEE Trans Biomed Eng 2015 Jul 13. [Epub ahead of print]
- ^ Egorov V, Sarvazyan AP. Method and probe for providing tactile feedback in laparoscopic surgery. USA Provisional Patent Application, No. 62199899; July 31, 2015.


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|By PR Newswire
Article Rating:
|January 24, 2014 11:01 AM EST
LOS ANGELES, Jan. 24, 2014 /PRNewswire-iReach/ -- Richard Spooner, one of America's top riders, is raising money through Crowdfunding to raise money to purchase his next top Grand Prix horse. Nicknamed the 'Master of Faster', Richard Spooner is currently ranked 46th on the Longines World Rankings, which makes him the sixth best US ranked rider in the world. With over 100 Grand Prix victories, Spooner has been the Pacific Coast Horse Show Association Grand Prix Rider of the year twelve times.
(Photo: http://photos.prnewswire.com/prnh/20140124/MN52048)
Currently based out of Pradelles en Val, France, Spooner counts some of his most memorable career highlights as competing on the United States Equestrian team in 2009 winning two Super League Nations Cup Gold Medals in Rome Italy, and St. Gallen Switzerland. Last year he won the highly-coveted Global Champions Tour Grand Prix of Monaco with his top horse Cristallo. Spooner and Cristallo also represented Team USA in the Furusiyya Nations Cup event at Hickstead, where Team USA finished second overall, next to Team Germany.
Richard Spooner wins the Nexen Cup at Spruce Meadows
Through the crowdfunding platform, RocketHub, Spooner will attempt to raise money to acquire his next top international mount through a source of revenue that has proved successful for new ventures, game developers and movie producers. Describing his intentions on the RocketHub website, Richard states that he "will select the horse from prospects he has located in Europe after a trial, and a full vetting. Once purchased, Richard Spooner will compete with this horse both nationally, in the United States, and internationally, Europe, Canada, and other countries. The goal is to acquire a horse that will soon be competing at the Grand Prix level."
RocketHub is the world's crowdfunding machine. RocketHub is an international, pioneering, open community that has helped thousands of artists, scientists, entrepreneurs, and social leaders raise millions of dollars. – See more at: http://blog.rockethub.com/#sthash.nvXS7msO.dpuf
So what is Crowdfunding?
Crowdfunding, alternately termed crowd financing, equity crowdfunding, crowd equity, crowd-sourced fundraising, is the collective effort of individuals who network and pool their money, usually via the Internet, to support efforts initiated by other people or organizations. Crowdfunding is used in support of a wide variety of activities, including disaster relief, citizen journalism, support of artists by fans, political campaigns, start-up company funding, motion picture promotion, free software development, inventions development, scientific research, and civic projects.
Top game developing companies such as Ouya, inXile Entertainment and Obsidian Entertainment raised an impressive $16.78 Million collectively, in crowdfunded capital. Game developers and technology start-ups have been the most popular and successful companies to use crowdfunding but non-for-profit organizations have also used the new-age capital source to also raise money for much-needed causes.
If you would like to fund Richard Spooner's Project through RocketHub Join the fun. For as little as $10 you can join Richard and Kaylen Spooner in their new adventure to find Richard his next top horse!
Media Contact: Richard Spooner, Richard Spooner, 818-726-5727, [email protected]
News distributed by PR Newswire iReach: https://ireach.prnewswire.com
SOURCE Richard Spooner
Containers have changed the mind of IT in DevOps. They enable developers to work with dev, test, stage and production environments identically. Containers provide the right abstraction for microservices and many cloud platforms have integrated them into deployment pipelines. DevOps and Containers together help companies to achieve their business goals faster and more effectively.
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The buzz continues for cloud, data analytics and the Internet of Things (IoT) and their collective impact across all industries. But a new conversation is emerging - how do companies use industry disruption and technology enablers to lead in markets undergoing change, uncertainty and ambiguity? Organizations of all sizes need to evolve and transform, often under massive pressure, as industry lines blur and merge and traditional business models are assaulted and turned upside down. In this new da...
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The web app is agile. The REST API is agile. The testing and planning are agile. But alas, data infrastructures certainly are not. Once an application matures, changing the shape or indexing scheme of data often forces at best a top down planning exercise and at worst includes schema changes that force downtime. The time has come for a new approach that fundamentally advances the agility of distributed data infrastructures. Come learn about a new solution to the problems faced by software organ...
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Choose from our best hostels in Brasov, Romania
Villa Park
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Best hostel in Brasov!! We absolutely loved it here and re-booked our stay for 6 times, ending up staying a week instead of one day. It is so clean you can literally eat from the floor (they even cook all the cutlery in vinegar every two days, just saying). It has a home feeling, very More
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My stay in Kismet Dao Hostel was very pleasant. The bedrooms are very spacious, and it is situated in a quiet area, at 15 min on foot from the city center. The staff is very likeable, and the atmosphere among the guests is very good. The beds were comfortable too. It has a meeting room More
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Best location in town and great facilities. It was a bit empty when we where there (Sep) but still had a nice atmosphere. Wifi was really really good, worth being mentioned here. =) More
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excellent staff, friendly and with brilliant local info. Very clean. Bathroom facilities clean but shared with no real drying area and strict rules made showering and changing difficult. Lacking a communal area to meet other tourists/travellers. Ok place for a bed for the night. More
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Old Town Brasov Hostel
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- 4th Sep 2015
Staff was ok, not great. Was clean.. Plastic on the mattresses,so was a nightmare to sleep. More
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- 24th Aug 2015
Great hostel really well located, the girls of the staff are very cool and friendly. You have a patio if you want to smoke, free wifi in the room, lockers, don't have to pay extra for leaving your bags or such as in other places. There's also a kitchen and breakfast included, consisting of More
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Things aren't so rosy in the US capital.
Caps' Perreault denies report he asked for trade
Washington forward Mathieu Perreault has responded to a story in La Presse, refuting the claim he asked for a trade out of the nation's capital.
"All I want is a little bit more ice time and I talked to Adm Oates and George [McPhee] today about it,"Perreault told the Washington Times. "All I want is to play. I wanna be here. I don't wanna go anywhere.
"If you guys read the article in French it doesn't say that I asked for a trade. Never."
Nothing in it for the Perrault comments. Johansen probably has little chance of being moved as well. Oates wants to get the team winning first I'm sure, then making sure he gives rookies ice time.


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Bringing International music ensembles to smaller communities throughout the Midwest. Learn more >>
Blending far-ranging musical influences with authenticity and conviction.
Find out where the World Fest musicians are playing next.
See the list of events >>
Oi, Amigos! / Hello, my friends!
It has been many days since we arrived home after the second part of Arts Midwest Tour. I am still putting things in place, but I feel that's absolutely necessary to talk about this wonderful experience that me and my friends have lived in the program.
Maybe my English skills are not enough to explain how this program was important for us, but I'm not worried, because my Portuguese skills would not be enough, too!!
Actually, it is impossible to describe in words the richness of this experience.
Arts Midwest World Fest • 2908 Hennepin Avenue, Suite 200 • Minneapolis, MN 55408 • 612.341.0755
Major funding for Arts Midwest World Fest is generously provided by:
See the complete list of supporters | Community Tools


text: Found ArtSadie SteinFiled to: earringJewelryArchaeologyJerusalemexcavationIsraelAncient worldRomeAnient rome11/10/08 6:45pmEditDeleteInvite manuallyPromoteDismissUndismissBlock for jezebelHideShare to KinjaGo to permalinkA 2,000 year old gold earring was just found beneath a parking lot near Jerusalem's Old City. And it's nice: "A large pearl inlaid in gold with two drop pieces, each with an emerald and pearl set in gold," which would obviously have belonged to someone of status. Because Jerusalem was sacked so many times, and most precious metals were melted down or sold, such intact finds are rare — especially Roman ones. The piece is valuable not merely for its beauty but because it "brings attention to the life of women in antiquity." [LiveScience]82ReplyLeave a reply


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Former men's basketball standout Dikembe Mutombo was among a group of nine speakers slated for Georgetown University's 2010 commencement, announced on Tuesday.
April 28, 2010
WASHINGTON - Former men's basketball standout Dikembe Mutombo was among a group of nine speakers slated for Georgetown University's 2010 commencement, announced on Tuesday.
Also speaking at the May 20-23 commencement exercises are CBS Face the Nation moderator Bob Schieffer, Republic of Liberia President Ellen Johnson Sirleaf and U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission chair Mary Schapiro, as well as parasitologist Dr. David Molyneux; Pulitzer Prize-winning author Edward P. Jones; Dr. Reed Tuckson, executive vice president of United Health Group; CEO Shelia C. Johnson; and British Supreme Court Justice and Baroness Brenda Hale. Gen. George Casey, Army chief of staff and himself a former Georgetown football player, will speak at the Reserve Office Training Corps (ROTC) Commissioning Ceremony.
Georgetown holds individual commencement ceremonies for each undergraduate and professional school after a series of awards ceremonies and celebrations on campus that begin with Senior Convocation on May 22.
Mutombo will receive a Doctor of Humane Letters.
"Our commencement speakers are exceptional individuals who represent a wide spectrum of backgrounds and perspectives," said Georgetown President John J. DeGioia. "They've devoted themselves to addressing critical issues around the world, and they represent the many opportunities that await our graduates."
Mutombo (SLL'91) played 18 seasons in the National Basketball Association and has long made it a priority to improve the health, education and quality of life for the people of his native Congo. In 1997, he founded the Dikembe Mutombo Foundation, dedicated to improving the health, education and quality of life for people in the republic. The foundation provides comprehensive health care at the Biamba Marie Mutombo Hospital, and promotes health care, disease prevention, health policy, health research and increased access to health care education.
Mutombo was the recipient of Georgetown's seventh annual John Thompson Legacy of a Dream Award in honor of his work to better the lives of others in February. His other awards include being named a Young Global Leader by the World Economic Forum, and receiving the Ernie Davis Humanitarian Award, NAACP Phoenix Award and the U.S. President's Service Award.
A two-time All-BIG EAST selection, Mutombo averaged 15.2 points, 12.2 rebounds and 4.7 blocks as a senior in 1991, when he was named First Team All-BIG EAST and earned Third Team All-American honors. Mutombo was selected to Georgetown's "All Century Team" and still ranks among the all-time leaders in blocked shots (3rd, 354) and rebounds (12th,8.6 per game).
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No police inquiry for Harman
Leader of the Commons will not face inquiry over failure to declare a donation she indirectly received from property developer David Abrahams
Preachers from overseas 'may bring problems'
Mixed response to Jacqui Smith's new counter-terrorism proposals as chair of Minab shows caution over importing imams
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Smith invites moderate imams into UK to help Muslim communities fight extremism
UK news p4
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Tough New York welfare scheme for UK
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Brown competes with the Pope - and the shadow of Blair
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UK news p8
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Inquest witnesses tell of shock as boat went out in heavy seas
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Brown, like Wilson, knows what's going on
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Goa witness alleges police harassment
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Hello dear, I've got a leak. Can you give me a tow?
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UK news p13
Heavy drinkers may develop Alzheimer's earlier
New study shows drinking and smoking can speed up the onset of the disease
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90,000 pages of manuscripts, field notes, photographs and sketches will be available free to all
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UK news p14
Weaknesses in tackling wildlife crime revealed
Speight left two suicide notes, inquest told
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Police excavating the care home where more than 100 people claim they were abused have discovered two pits behind the boys' dormitory
UK news p15
T5 baggage heading back to Heathrow after trip to Milan
After 24-hour road trip to Italy, hundreds of suitcases yet to be reunited with owners admits BA
By all accounts, that bolshie, leftwing Hollywood actor Tim Robbins wowed a US broadcasters' convention in Las Vegas the other night with his criticisms of the American media


text:
Cutaneous tuberculosis in Indian children: the importance of screening for involvement of internal organs
Article first published online: 18 MAY 2004
DOI: 10.1111/j.1468-3083.2004.00970.x
Journal of the European Academy of Dermatology and Venereology
Volume 18, Issue 5, pages 546–551, September 2004
Additional Information
How to Cite
Pandhi, D., Reddy, B., Chowdhary, S. and Khurana, N. (2004), Cutaneous tuberculosis in Indian children: the importance of screening for involvement of internal organs. Journal of the European Academy of Dermatology and Venereology, 18: 546–551. doi: 10.1111/j.1468-3083.2004.00970.x
Publication History
- Issue published online: 2 JUL 2004
- Article first published online: 18 MAY 2004
- Received: 15 May 2003, accepted 19 May 2004
- Abstract
- Article
- References
- Cited By
- antitubercular therapy;
- cutaneous tuberculosis;
- lichen scrofulosorum;
- paediatric;
- scrofuloderma;
- verrucosa cutis
Aims and objectives Resurgence of skin tuberculosis especially with drug-resistant strains has been well documented in recent years, but this problem has not received much attention in the paediatric age group. Hence, we carried out the present study to analyse the clinical and therapeutic aspects of cutaneous tuberculosis in children.
Materials and methods A detailed clinical examination, investigations, such as haemogram, serology for HIV, Mantoux test, chest X-ray, cytology, culture and histopathology were carried out in all children. They were treated with antitubercular therapy (WHO regimen), and the clinical response was followed up.
Results Of 142 patients with cutaneous tuberculosis, 68 were children (40 females, 28 males). These children were aged from 9 months to 14 years. The duration of the disease varied from 1 month to 6 years. Family history of tuberculosis was present in 28 (41.2%) of the patients. Scrofuloderma was the most common presentation encountered in 30 (44.1%) patients with preferential involvement of the cervical (56.2%) and inguinal (20%) regions. Fifteen (22.1%) patients had lupus vulgaris, of which the keratotic type was the most common (46.7%), 16 had lichen scrofulosorum, three had tuberculosis verrucosa cutis, and four had more than one type of tuberculosis. Involvement of the lung in 14 (20.6%), bone in seven (10.2%), and both in four (5.9%) was found. Histopathology corroborated the clinical diagnosis in 54 (80.6%), culture was positive in six (8.8%). Fifty (73.5%) patients completed the treatment with an excellent response, no multidrug resistant cases were seen.
Conclusions Cutaneous tuberculosis in children continues to be an important cause of morbidity, there is a high likelihood of internal involvement, especially in patients with scrofuloderma. A search is required for more sensitive, economic diagnostic tools. Response to treatment at 4 weeks often helps in substantiating the diagnosis of tuberculosis in doubtful cases.


text:
Be Prepared for Your Adventures Afield and Water
Same size main compartment as CQ I with the addition of two large roomy side pockets measure 10"x 7"x 3" sewn to the main pouch.
Made of top of the line fleece. Other fabric, colors can be order
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Rep. Alcee Hastings (Florida)
Although I was not there the day that Dr. King delivered his historic "I Have a Dream" speech on the National Mall, the impact of his message still resonated in me as it did in persons of color all across this nation. Our country has changed much since that historic event, but unfortunately we still find ourselves struggling for equality and justice. The Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial serves as a reminder to us all that we have the ability to make a difference in this world and that this fight is not yet over.
(Photo: www.alceehastings.house.gov)
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text:
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text:
266 Views 1 Reply Latest reply: Jan 2, 2013 6:18 PM by Matt Clifton
Matt Clifton Jan 2, 2013 6:18 PM
Re: I cannot find the Airplay icon on my imac or ipad in response to mhoehn
There's no Airplay icon on a Mac unless you're running 10.8 and have a supported recent Mac.
On an iPad, open any video in the Videos app and start playing it - you should see the Airplay icon at the bottom right. Or, go to the springboard (double-tap the Home key) and scroll it all the way to the left, where you see the music buttons. The Airplay Mirroring button is there.


text:
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Astonishingly BAdass's blog
on 01.05.2013
Get in my podcast: Tales of Sandboxerus!
Good day once again Destructoid. I am Astonishingly BAdass, and I'm here to ask you a question; Is a man not entitled to the sweat from his br... no wait, sorry, wrong script. This is the one for my underwater kingdom of nutbags and think-wrongs.
No, instead, I come to you with a proposition. I have been toying with the idea for some time, and I believe the Destructoid community would make a good home for it. A new game related podcast!
Yes, another one.
But wait, there's more! This would not be a podcast which would talk about games. This would be a podcast where you enter the game, come face to face with the fiercest adversarys, explore the most dangerous lands, and probably end up dead.
What I propose is an audio version of a Dungeons and Dragons-esque role playing game, recorded for an audience, where three or so players and myself as dungeon master embark on an epic quest filled with the protaganists, antagonists and NPC's of video games. The world will be a mish-mash of many different game worlds; Vice City crossed with Morrowind, Olympus, the Halo, Racoon City and City 17 for example.
Any confident and mic-owning community members who would like to get involved, please comment below, because I reckon this could be fun!
on 12.28.2012
I am the God of a Shrunken Universe!
Due to popular (and fictional) demand, I have once again been called away from my luxury two bedroom apartment in de_dust2 to further guide the uninitiated in the ways of the online shooter enthusiast. In
part one
, we discussed how you can preen your feathers and enact the mating call of the average Counter-Strike enthusiast to help you blend in with your new adopted family of cursing adolescents. Exclusive to Destructoid, I can now reveal an excerpt from my upcoming memoirs, detailing my integration into a fledgling clan.
See part one of my travel log to find out how to get on with fellow players like one of these!
The one they called Spooky laughed as I crouched over the fallen counter terrorist, miming the traditional and homo-erotic dance of victory practiced by online gamers for many years. His thick north England accented voice bellowed with laughter as I turned and shot his pal Barber in the face, as Barber let out another sigh of disbelief at his all too sudden failure. �HAX!� Barber responded from beyond the grave (as is tradition).
The smallest and youngest of this group, Jake, who happened to be a fellow terrorist, cried out in elation as he felled Freedom, whom I suspect to be the mate of Spooky. She quietly sighed before calling Jake a bastard, which only spurred Jake�s near climactic glee beyond safe boundaries.
My success in integrating myself within this small, possibly vulnerable pack was down to two things alone; one, being good at the game. Two, the �well pervy� voice I am forced to put on, as I still live at home and am forced to speak quietly when playing late at night, a voice which comes across more Christopher Walken than soft spoken Jude Law. The latter served to amuse this quartet of players, whilst the former confirmed by belonging with them.
The next day, a server was rented, a clan web page formed, a badge concocted, and a name was born, a name which to this day, I neither care for nor understand. For we are �Hunters of Gunmen�, which I�m told by Freedom is good because the initials will be H.O.G, which is also the name of some sort of real life military group. As an extra surprise, despite having no knowledge of what was to happen, I had also been made an admin of this server. I was ecstatic. Had it really worked? Was I truly integrated to the point where the primitive inhabitants of this world were happy to grant me power over the very existence of their mortal plane? Did they really trust me with the power to release the Sword of Damoclese upon any foolish enough to abuse the customs and traditions of their people, along with all the Team Fortress 2 noises which can be played by admins for no good reason? To warp time and space if the map we were playing on displeased me? It seemed, finally, after two months in the jungle, the office and the dusty Middle-Eastern village, the stabilisers were off, and I was hurtling through the park on a shiny red metaphorical BMX.
This is pretty much my new job
At the time of writing, I have only wielded the power to play TF2 noises at the inhabitants of my new realm. This has received a mixed reaction. Aside from my new God-like powers, a much greater benefit has been realised; security. I know now that there is always a server where I am in control, where I can guide the locals who visit our territory/server away from their homophobic and racist slurs by killing or banning them. A place where I can no longer be banned from for simply killing the guy who owns the server more than he would like. A place where everybody knows my name, whether they like it or not. And a place where the fools I have duped into being Steam friends regularly procrastinate, ready for the plucking. Online gaming to the new adventurer is a dark, dangerous, hormonal and sweaty place on the surface. Penetrate the perspiring outer shell of this loud and outspoken species of online FPS enthusiasts, and you can find inner harmony, a second home, and power over life and death.
on 11.29.2012
How To Make Friends and Frag People
We all love having friends. Who doesn�t? Whether it be consuming toxic liquids together to decrease intelligence, skipping stones by the lake, or a good old fashioned friendly mugging, we as humans have constantly found ways to enhance our time on this Earth through shared experiences with those we care for and admire. As the twenty-first century dawned, a new way to meet and befriend people quickly took shape; online competitive gaming.
To an outsider, this brave new world may look vast, ugly and intimidating. Well fear no longer, because just for you, Professor Astonishingly Badass is here to gently coax you in to a world of gunfire, laughter and smiles. You lucky people.
In my studies, I have traversed the deep chasms of online multiplayer, hitchhiked through Steam, taken a seaplane to Xbox Live, and spelunked my way even to the scary underworld of Playstation branded fun. I have collected the notes in my journal and formed an easy to read �Handbook for the Online Gaming Curious�; a volume devoted to ensure you fare well amongst the apparent savages of these lands, and don�t end up tied to a plank and spit roasted. Please note: these several pointers have been written for newcomers to online gaming (or �n00b� as it is known in the local tongue), to ensure that you blend right in to this colourful, occasionally greyish brown world.
Don�t the natives colourful matching attire intimidate you. You�re the boss here!
1. Complain frequently of Team Imbalance
If Team Deathmatch is your poison, then this first step is a must. When first starting out in your adventure, it is worth bearing in mind that you are ill equipped for the road ahead. No matter how many times you�ve completed the single player version of your chosen game, you will not have the skills required to survive for long in this cutthroat land. To blend in straight away, you must immediately question the fairness of the teams when your team is losing and the other is winning. It is obviously not your fault that the group you have been assigned to could be considered to be less skilled than the other eight random folks who happen to have also stumbled upon your chosen server. You can tackle this injustice easily.
1. Continuously write comments to the effect of �IMBALANCE,� �TEAM SHUFFLE VOTE GUYS� and �WHY YOU FUCKING VOTE NO? IMBALANCE! LOL�. Whether your efforts are successful or not, it is important to voice your concern to the natives, as they value your feedback.
2. Repeat Step 1 constantly. Don�t give up.
3. Also, make sure to attempt to call a Team Shuffle Vote as much as your chosen game will allow you to, assuming the game has this option.
Follow these steps, and results are guaranteed. These results may vary however.
2. Compliment a skilled opponent on his use of alternative software within the game
Sometimes, life defeats you. Other times, it�s a guy on the Counter-Terrorist side with an AWP who is quite proficient with his chosen sniper rifle. Lord knows he may have worked hard during the opening few rounds to obtain his chosen weapon, so now you have to play the cards you have been dealt. Why should you be adjusting your tactics just to appease the laws of the universe and the aforementioned Counter-Terrorist sniper with the username �L33TSniper420�. Luckily, God has given you a voice, and you must use your voice to air your concerns about the legitimacy of your dominant opponent�s apparent skill with his chosen weapon. In my time with the natives, I discovered a popular chant which you may use to your advantage:
(plural of hack)
: The collective term for alternative software used to artificially enhance the aiming capabilities of a player in a competitive online shooter. Derived from the Native Indian
, a term used to describe the invention of the musket.
This utterance should be shouted through the microphone, or typed in the chatbox, to alert your fellow players that you suspect foul play is at hand. Very often, this may not be the case, but when you�re out in the jungle, you can never be cautious enough.
3. The �RAGEQUIT (LOL)�
A term which gained momentum with the 2008 video game �Left 4 Dead,� used to describe the actions of someone who foresees imminent defeat, and rather than face the music, will take flight away from the fight before allowing their opponents the satisfaction of triumphing over them. This is a move which should only be used when all your tools have been expended. The opposing team refuses to acknowledge your potential, disputes your accusations of aim-assisting software, and wants to continue stamping your face into the metaphorical dirt, so why hang around? There are other fights to join, potential victories to be had, so cut your losses, tuck your tail firmly between your legs, and hit that Quit Game button with your head held high. You can be the bigger man here, don�t let L33TSnipers have his way with you!
4. Use alternative software within the game to enhance your own abilities.
In any walk of life, people love a winner. Don�t fall for that old clich� of �people love an underdog�. That�s bollocks. People want to bask in the glow of someone who has inexplicably killed twelve opponents in one round with a (normally) highly inaccurate machine gun, cutting through them like a knife through butter, despite the obvious handicap of them being on the other side of the level, a wall or any other bullet-penetrable barrier you can conceive. Aim assisting software is a God-send for the weary traveller who does not have time to master the different routes through levels, likely choke points, or the benefits of certain weapons over others. The modern man or woman demands results fast, and hacking the game to pieces will deliver those results faster than you can reload a sidearm. There may be those who accuse you weakly of somehow cheating, but you can rest easily in the knowledge they are merely jealous of your initiative, and are probably cheating anyway.
Use of �Hax� will also make your game appear more colourful, Like that movie Tron!
5. Spend extra attention on female players
In my time in the jungle, in rare instances, myself and my teammates would be confronted with a rare opportunity; meeting a female in this barren wasteland. I myself mistakenly kept myself to myself and carried on playing. Much to my dismay, I found I had committed a faux par. My comrades, as well as my opponents, immediately sprang into action, as if they had been training for this moment all their lives. The mating call of the male online gamer may confuse and alienate those from the outside world, but I can only assume that the female player did indeed send pictures of her breasts to �UberGamer95� and �UKCS: JokerACMilanRfags� as requested. You may not see this opportunity arise in all your travels, but as soon as a female emerges from the vegetation, follow the suit of your fellow players, unless, like AC Milan Football Club, you wish to be branded a �fag�. Which leads me on to my next advice�
6. Question the sexuality of your fellow players and discriminate against your chosen sexuality for them.
We as civilised human beings have long thrown away the shackles of an oppressive regime of abuse against those outside of a mixed gender relationship. We treat each other as equals, no matter what their choice of night time companion is. The natives of the gaming world, as a whole, have not reached this stage of development yet. In fact, it does not even matter if their chosen target of criticism is of the gay persuasion. This �insult� can be levelled at near enough anyone, be they stronger or weaker on the battlefield, straight or gay, male or female (see section 5), or black or white. As soon as you successfully release your torrent of accusations, a new pecking order will be established, and you, as the hetrosexual male gamer you may or may not be, will sit comfortably at the top! (Or at least above the poor sod you just called a �bummer�)
7. When all else fails, crouch crouch crouch
The online gamer is a varied species. They may not all speak the same language, but one tool of communication is universal; the �Teabagging�. A movement long thought to be well overdue of dying out which persists to this very day, the act of teabagging (miming dipping parts of your possibly male genitalia into the face of a fallen opponent) is a language spoken by everyone. By standing over your fallen prey and continuously pressing Ctrl or the left thumbstick button, you�re planting your flag, sounding the trumpet of victory over the opponent stupid enough to get in the way of your bullets. Stand tall reader (and then squat, and then stand tall, and then squat), you are now inducted into the tribe!
We hope you have enjoyed this Astonishingly Badass publication. For more like this, why not read
Why Japanese Games Suck
DmC: WtF?
on 11.15.2012
Three years later: An obituary for Left 4 Dead 2
The night was suddenly too quiet. After the last of the horde had fallen to the ground in a pile of blood and intestines, the four survivors had plenty of time to collect their thoughts. Chris used the time to scout the ground around the hundreds of fresh bodies that now littered the swamp, finding a pipe bomb and some pills. Aidan reloaded, took out his axe (a trusty side weapon he was never without) and switched back to his hunting rifle, before switching back to the axe, and then back to the rifle again. Mark took to jumping between two small earthy mounds that stuck out of the stagnant water, back and forth and back and forth, waiting for the others, while Lara stood by and insulted him ferociously. After twenty seconds, it started to dawn on them each in turn that nothing had attacked them for at least a minute, and that they should probably press on.
It was nearly three years ago that Left 4 Dead 2 was released. I was a twenty-one year old student of English Literature living 150 miles from home in a shabby student house in the arse end of Canterbury. My studies were suffering hugely, due to sheer volume of incoming work and projects, as well as a growing indifference towards the subject matter on my part. Late every night, when my housemates had long gone to bed, I would stay up and try to catch up, not working too much during the day so as to keep the impression amongst them that I was doing pretty well. I wasn�t. Every time I received an assignment back, a disappointing sub-fifty percent score would glare at me in big red letters from the page. I was mere weeks away from giving up.
It didn�t help that my best friend of the two previous years, a law student by the name of Mark, had decided to drop his course and proceed with a medical career instead. He was back in Surrey, retaking A-Levels in order to get into his preferred university, only to return to Canterbury twice more for mere social visits. I will always admire him for his decision. It takes balls to discard two years of your life for a new direction, but he did it and is reaping the rewards.
And thus, I found myself in a new house, far from the university, living with three students who appeared to be having a whale of a time with student life in general. These were the only three people I had any regular contact with for the final year, aside from the two guys who worked in the X-Electrical store near the cathedral, who would be subjected to my daily visits. I barely spoke to them, but we eventually were on first name basis.
Was I lonely? Initially, very much so. Housemate number one was a vibrant, passionate man from Birmingham who, like me, loved video games, and was someone with whom I could spend time with whenever he was kicking about. But, unlike me, he had places to be and people to see, and was usually too busy to indulge me in yet more Gears of War 2 horde mode. I didn�t begrudge him his additional life, merely envied him.
Housemate number two was a highly popular girl who spent most of her time out of the house. We got on fine, and had many a chat in the kitchen over coffee, but our friendship didn�t extend much beyond this.
And finally, Housemate three was a man with whom I shared a begrudged friendship. We tolerated each other merely for the convenience of our friends in common, but make no mistake; we hated each other. Not for any malicious reason. It was mere incompatibility. He lives in Canada now and has a moustache.
Finally, the silence was broken. The shrill cry of the hunter, followed very quickly by the crack as he landed with full force on Mark, made the other three jump in their seats. Under the flailing claws and sprays of blood, Mark laughed briefly. �Fuck, haha, get it off!� Aidan was nearest and was drawing his axe when the cow-like whail of the Charger sounded. In a blur, Aidan disappeared, the horrific monstrosity carrying him a good hundred metres away before ploughing him into a tree. �Oh crap!� Lara shouted into her microphone, as the high pitched maniacal laugh of the Jockey filled hers and Chris�s headsets. The jockey had snuck up from behind and jumped Lara, leaving only Chris to repel this highly co-ordinated attack from their four opponents.
The summer of 2009 was largely uneventful. E3 rolled round, with Left 4 Dead 2 being showcased. My interest was briefly caught, but dissipated as scepticism of such a quick sequel to a game released less than a year ago grew. I did buy my first gaming PC, and was interested in delving into online multiplayer after having my appetite whetted by Gears of War�s Team Deathmatch. Initially, I bought Crysis and The Orange Box, and had a good time with both of those. Team Fortress 2 was fun, but in its early incarnation, held little appeal for too many return visits. By the time November had come, I had nothing left to play on PC, and very little on my sole console of the time, the Xbox 360, was calling to me.
And so it was with few other gaming options that I resorted to Valve�s sequel to a game I had only watched over Marks shoulder the previous year (It had been he who had encouraged me to either replace or upgrade my clunky old Windows XP PC with 2.4ghz processing power and 1gb of RAM.) I handed over �34.99, and made my way home. It was the third time I had registered a product on Steam, proceeded only by The Orange Box and Audiosurf. After a short wait, I booted the game up, having contacted Mark to see if he wished to join me. He did.
Chris had to act fast. First, he dealt with the boomer that had rounded a tree not too far from him. One shot of his auto shotgun and it was gone in a mist of red. Next, he punted the jockey from Lara�s head before the little bastard could ride her further away. The two then both right clicked the midget-infected into oblivion. Unfortunately, this meant that Aidan and Mark were now incapacitated, and their life bars at the bottom of the screen told the two standing survivors that their chances of survival were slim.
Four hours after first booting up the game, and I finally exited my room. I was dehydrated, slightly hungry, and needed a cigarette. But it was totally worth it. In a way, I also felt slightly bad. Only that morning, I had shelled out as much money as I would normally spend in two weeks on a game that I had now completed but for one final campaign. As someone of limited finances, it was a rare occasion I would buy a game brand new and at launch, and now that policy seemed justified. Sure, myself and Mark would play the campaigns again on the harder difficulties, but how long could that last?
Instinctively, they split up. Lara went to help Mark, who was shouting into his mic that the hunter victim should always be prioritised, whilst Aidan remained silent. Chris shot the Charger four times in the back, and revived his fallen teammate. �Ta very much� he said. �Lara, do you still have that Molotov?�
Lara was still helping Mark up off the floor. �Yep. Why? Oh!�
The horribly familiar music of a tank attack had crept in, with the four survivors too distracted to notice. Not far away, a human-controlled tank would be running full pelt at the survivors. Judging by the further incidental music, he would not be alone.
With Mark and Aidan in bad shape, it didn�t look too promising. �Well, I�m pretty sure one of them is defintley hacking, but other than that, they won�t get too far when they�re survivors� �Mark stated with confidence.
�Yeah, those two idiots keep running off and leaving the other two. Just pick the back ones off first and we�ll be fine� Aidan stated with authority he may or may not have possessed. But suddenly, both his and Mark�s HUD�s showed a very welcome sight; their two teammates were using their medkits on their injured comrades. With time to spare before the tank was upon them, Lara pulled out the Molotov, Chris the pipe bomb he had found earlier, and they all opened fire. Two minutes later, they had made it to the saferoom.
It was nearly a year and a half later once I had stopped playing Left 4 Dead 2. In that time, I had formed a Steam group with membership in the triple figures for those myself and my clan mates deemed to be a good teammate/opponent for the versus mode which we most commonly frequented. But most importantly, I had picked up some good friends along the way. I became good friends with Chris, a childhood friend of Mark�s, with whom I�d likely have had no interaction with but for this game. There was Andy/Apache, a young and handsome Yorkshireman who I would frequently tease about being handsome and from Yorkshire, and of course, the ever impatient and hilarious Lara, whom myself and Mark discovered to be female a great length of time after she had become a regular on our team, much to our surprise. She would later become a partner of mine in several overly ambitious projects which, in all honesty, never reached fruition, but which we had great fun doing.
Our eventual clan logo
And so, whilst 2009/10 seemed to be an endless sea of lectures, seminars and casual acquaintances mixed in with disappointment, indifference and shame, it eventually was rescued by a game with a simple concept; �Live together; or die alone�. A game that brought me closer to four awesome people, a game which ensured myself and Mark, my good friend of the two years previous, stayed in contact. A game which helped me cope with a depressing situation, right up the point where I finally passed my degree (just) despite a lot of warning signs to the contrary. A game that not only entertained me and allowed a feeling of escapism, but made me feel needed by my new found friends. I can say with some confidence that Left 4 Dead 2 saved my degree, saved my year, and even had a hand in shaping me into the person I am today. Roll on Left 4 Dead 3!
on 11.11.2012
Our First Post: Skullf***ed by Pleasure
Badass First Post, Badass First Episode
L. Writes:
I would like to say hello and thank you to all who have taken the time to click their way into this blog. My name is Aidan O�Dwyer, known as L. on Steam and Left 4 Dead 2 and as jebussaves88 on my previous account here. In my previous incarnation, I wrote posts relating to a backlog I was working my way through, which were viewed by few probably due to the somewhat uninteresting nature of a blog written by some guy about some games he�s played with little insight into the person himself. But not to worry, I have taken jebussaves88 round the back of the shed and shot him. He won�t be bothering you anymore.
I write to you from this new account, a new start for not just myself, but four others. Yes, we are legion, for we are many. First off is myself; I�m a 24 year old Registration Officer (someone who facilitates civil marriages) from the south of England. I enjoy competitive online FPS�s, racing games and co-op games, but generally have a soft spot for all games other than real time strategy.
I am joined by StrYdA (real name Mark). A 23 year old Surrey based student of medicine, his main enthuse is for real time strategy, but like me, he is highly partial to a spot of first person shooting and co-operative gameplay, as well as fantasy games in general.
Third amongst us is an old school friend of Marks and another student of medicine, Chris (AKA Killerkris) whose tastes largely are similar to Mark�s although he at times finds himself happier with a single player experience.
Our resident girl is Rhyn (AKA Lara) a care assistant from Suffolk, whom myself and StrYdA met online through Left 4 Dead 2�s online multiplayer. We have no idea what she looks like, but we do know she has a scooter named Trevor, loves Doctor Who (for the most part) and is also an avid fiction writer.
Finally, Apache (real name Andrew), an admin for some sort of green hippy company whose name I should probably ask. We haven�t been in contact with Andrew too much lately, as we have all drifted away from Left 4 Dead 2. This is something I�m hoping this blog will fix.
The first episode can be found above. Much of the content is centred around myself, Rhyn and later StrYdA playing Borderlands 2. I have also included a short section in the middle which is myself quickly reviewing some video games whilst drinking wine. I hope to be joined by the others for this section, which hopefully will extend to more than just product reviews.
Finally, I would like to extend my invitation to you, the Destructoid community, to help make this video series better. What could we do more of? What could we do better? What should we completely abandon? How much gaffer tape should we put over StrYdA�s mouth to stop us from killing him? All questions I hope you will answer for us.
Additionally, if you would like to take part, then I throw open the doors to anyone amongst you to join our Steam group (The Astonishingly Badass) and get in touch with us. Heck, maybe we could make a video together!
Finally, I would like to draw your attention to a shameless ploy I concocted to get some more attention. I am giving away
on PC. All you have to do is leave a comment below, either giving us some feedback, or perhaps suggesting your own idea for an advertisement campaign modified with heavy swearing. UK entrants will receive the full packaged game as shown in the video, whereas viewers from abroad will simply receive a message from this account with the Steam code from within. Best suggestion/ fucking advertisement wins!
Thank you watching/reading, and good mental health!
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since 12:09 PM on 11.08.2012
Hello Destructoid,
You have traversed the depths of the C-Blogs and found your way here; a shabby cabin at the piss-end of nowehere, littered with discarded wine bottles and cigarette ends. You peer through the darkness to see five faint outlines in front of you. One sits composed and dignified in a desk chair by a badly damaged table, reading a textbook on human anatomy. He pays no attention to your arrival, and continues to read through unknown means in the darkness. To your left, in the corner, a shockingly handsome man in a plaid shirt sits behind a desk, smiles at you warmly, and refuses to break eye contact. To your right, on a stool, a surly woman in a nurses outfit cradles a cigarette in her outstrecthed claw, glaring at you with scorn that even the dark cannot disguise. The fourth figure sits on the floor, smiling dimly and fiddling with the laces of his white trainers and the dangly bits of his brown hoodie whilst puzzling over a particularly tricky section in his colouring book.
Finally, at the back of the room, you finally spot a familiar face, framed by scruffy hair and uneven sideburns. The man you recognise as jebussaves88 stands before you, nursing a half empty glass of Rioja, and yet this is not the man you once knew...
Welcome to the blog of the Astonishingly Badass clan, a group who met in the distant past of 2009 in the Versus mode of Left 4 Dead 2. Whilst our numbers were once strong, we five still stand united with two objectives; save humanity from not having enough of us in their lives, and to make silly gaming related videos. We feel Destructoid would be a good home for our upcoming video series "The Astonishingly Badass Show", as well as any future blogging content we may conjure up.
jebussaves88 is dead; long live {BA}
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- Type: White wine
- Varietal:Sauvignon Blanc
- Country: Chile
- Winery: De Martino
- Designation: 347 Vineyards
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As a winemaking family, our land has always been of the utmost importance to us; not just because it allows us to produce excellent wines, b... (more...)ut because we must protect and take care of it for future generations. That´s why we look to generate the least possible impact on it and to repay in some way everything which it has given to us. Based on this principle, we made sustainability central to our business. The Legado range is the result of a desire to express the typical character of Chile's most outstanding producing valleys.
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A brilliant yellow color with green undertones immediately communicates the sensation of freshness. It is refreshing on the nose with notes ... (more...)of citrus and tropical fruits and an herbaceous quality. On the palate, it is fresh with an intense acidity. Fruity notes reappear on the lingering finish.$13.00 Out of stock
De Martino 347 Vineyards Sauvignon Blanc - 2010(WE-127356)
* Expert NoteJanuary 12, 2012
A little hard at first, with match stick aromas. After that blows off, there's green fruit notes carrying the nose. Full in the mouth, with acidic cut and spunky flavors of nectarine and orange. Finishes round, with citrus and passion fruit.
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The Farmington School District is laying out a plan for improvements at district schools. The board got a first look Monday at a four-year plan for making a series of improvements identified in a facilities plan completed late last year. The proposal includes several improvements for 2011.
It looks like the Farmington School Board isn't quite done with the report compiled from the district's investigation of board member Tim Burke. At least, this board isn't. With three new members on the board, there was talk Monday of taking a closer look at the report. New board chair Tera Lee asked that each board member get a copy of the final report to allow further consideration. "I do not feel like I can make an educated decision about whether or not to move forward until I see that report," Lee said.
Tim Burke is getting the pay cut he asked for two years ago. Board members voted 4-2 Monday to cut the salaries paid to school board members. The move cuts the board chair's salary from $5,250 to $4,500 and board members' salaries from $4,200 to $3,600.
The Farmington School Board will welcome some fresh faces tonight with the swearing in of new members Tera Lee, Brian Treakle and Melissa Sauser. The new members will get right to work with a meeting that includes budget projections, an update on the district's strategic plan and the presentation of superintendent Brad Meeks' annual performance evaluation. Tonight's agenda also includes a presentation on a four-year plan for facility improvement projects. The board has talked for several weeks about improvements identified in a recently completed facilities plan.
Two months ago, Tanna Howie wasn't sure what her next step in life was going to be. The 2010 Farmington High School graduate had hoped to attend the Art Institute in Minneapolis this year, but when the finances didn't work out, she was left without a clear direction. So, she waited, she prayed and she hoped to figure out what she was supposed to do with her life. Now, all of a sudden that next step is turning into an intercontinental leap of faith.
A lot of Dakota County land has disappeared under new homes over the past 10 years, but there is still plenty of open space out there for residents to explore. And the amount of land dedicated specifically to outdoor recreation is growing all the time. According to the county's 2010 indicators report, there are 48 square miles of protected open space spread among city and county parks, wildlife refuges, the Minnesota Zoo and land protected under the county's farmland and natural areas preservation efforts.
With most of the final bills in hand, it appears the investigation of Tim Burke will cost the Farmington School District at least $13,370. That total includes bills from two law firms involved in the investigation. Outgoing school board chair Veronica Walter said last week Minnetonka Attorney Jim Martin planned to charge the district $10,000 for his part of the investigation. That is the number attorney Mick Waldspurger, who hired Martin and brought the report to the board, had identified as a likely maximum cost. The total is less than Martin's original bill.
As the 2011 legislative session kicks off this week, Pat Garofalo is getting used to being a whole lot more popular around the capitol. Garofalo, the Farmington Republican who on Tuesday kicked off his fourth term in the state House of Representatives, said people started paying more attention to what he had to say once he was named chair of the state's K-12 education finance committee. "As soon as I was named chairman, suddenly my jokes became funnier, I was better looking and I was much smarter," Garofalo said.
If there are criminal charges filed against Farmington School Board member Tim Burke, they won't come from the Dakota County Attorney's office. The county attorney's office has opted not to charge Burke, who a report compiled as part of a school district investigation alleges may have broken some laws with some of his conduct since he was elected two years ago. Charges could still come from at the city level, but there are still plenty of questions to answer before they do. The school board referred the information to the county attorney following a Dec.
The Farmington School District has postponed a meeting originally scheduled for Wednesday night to discuss a recently completed facilities study and options available to pay for some of the recommended projects. The meeting was originally scheduled for 7 p.m.


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