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The Art of Groveling by Gao Lee Ji (translated by Sir Charles Peckerwood)
"The man who grovels makes a much smaller target." (Gao Lee Ji, c. 475 BCE)
There has been an explosion of interest in the humanities in the United States recently, and one of the major contributors to this has been the Business Sections of airport bookstores. Management book sections in particular have become the primary American source of knowledge about Asian cultures. The shelves almost overflow with serious scholarly works on the thought of the Chinese sage K'ung-Tzu (Confucius), the general Sun Tzu, the master dog breeder Shar Pei, and the philosopher Bruce Lee. The public's voracious appetite for Oriental wisdom that can be applied to practical business situations is so great that the book Go Rin No Sho (The Book of the Five Rings), Miyamoto Musashi's esoteric 17th century handbook on Japanese sword fighting has been among the most frequently gifted management books at office holiday parties for over thirty years.
It was therefore with great anticipation that we awaited the release of the new translation by Sir Charles Peckerwood of the fifth century BCE Chinese business classic The Art of Groveling by the immortal Gao Lee Ji (Panopticon Press, 2013, 554 pages). Although little known outside of China, Gao Lee Ji was the first Chinese sage that directly addressed what later became known as "business ethics".
Gao Lee Ji (c.550 BCE – c.476 BCE) was the Prime Minister and Commander of the Armies under the Li Ping Emperor of the state of Wang Chung located in what is now the province of Kwangtung, in southern China. He rose from obscure origins (several contemporary biographies of him survive, all contradictory but all pretty good) to become the de facto ruler of Wang Chung in 509 BCE. At that time, the state of Wang Chung was the most prosperous in China and possessed the largest and most modern army. But due to a series of unpredictable and unavoidable events that could have happened to anybody, by the eighth year of Gao Lee Ji's management the kingdom had been utterly laid waste and conquered and the Emperor himself had been impaled on one of his own banners and his body mounted over the main gate of his capital city.
Gao Lee Ji, surveying these events from his opulent retirement palace in the peaceful city of Ho An, 500 miles to the north, decided to take up his writing brush and over the next 25 years of his comfortable existence he penned miscellaneous anecdotes of his life and the lives of the Sages as well as words of wisdom to guide future generations. These were collected after his death and published in a volume called "The Art of Groveling".
Although some scholars can see the influence of Gao Lee Ji running through all subsequent periods of Chinese history, the manuscript of "The Art of Groveling" was only known through second hand references by other historians and philosophers. It was presumed lost until its unexpected discovery in the luggage of the last Manchu Emperor Pu Yi by the famous modern historian Hu Nu as he was helping load the bags onto a truck in 1923.
This discovery led to a Renaissance of Gao Lee Ji studies in modern China. So powerful was the influence of Gao Lee Ji during the formative period of the Chinese Revolution, that at least one of the Sayings of Chairman Mao that appear in the famous Little Red Book is believed to have actually originated with the great sage:
"If the tree does not bend, it will break. And in order to bend, the tree
Must always know from which way the wind is blowing."
The words of Gao Lee Ji will positively resonate with the business reader. His analects are so fresh and profound that one can expect that they will quickly attain the level of cliché in the American business community.
Here are some representative selections from the pen of the master.
"Responsibility is a cake to be shared by many; credit is a cherry to be eaten by only one."
"There are three things that are worth their weight in gold; a prudent statesman, a cunning general, and a beautiful woman with very low self esteem."
The Sage Gao Lee Ji once said to Fen Shu Lu "The fastest way to improve your results is to lower your standards."
"One's courage increases in proportion to one's distance away from the enemy. In all battles, find the position where your courage is the strongest."
When the Imperial Chamberlain laughed at General Gao Lee Ji after he dropped his Scepter of Authority at the Grand Military Review, the General said to him "The superior man forgives all slights." Then the General told him to think about that as he had him carted off to the beheading grounds.
"A secret hoard of gold in a non-descript house in a distant city can be a hidden blessing."
"Sometimes "it could be worse" is the highest quality to which one can aspire."
"Be careful in the details of all things. Even Confucius was once dismissed by Prince Chung because he had a particularly long nose hair that the Prince could not get out of his mind."
"The ideas of a Court Official of the 3rd Rank are always 70 percent brilliant; of a Court Official of the 2nd Rank 80 percent brilliant, of a Court Official of the 1st rank 90 percent brilliant. The ideas of the Emperor are always 100 percent brilliant."
"One battle plan; many escape plans."
"To ensure good fortune for one's house, a gentleman must frequently honor his ancestors by visiting their tombs, kowtowing three times before the ancestral tablets, and burning fine sticks of incense. If this does not bring good fortune, a gentleman must look for new ancestors to honor."
"A great general obscures his true plans from others, cultivating mysteriousness to the point of invisibility. That way, if something goes wrong, he can claim that he wasn't there."
"Know thy self, know thy enemy. A thousand battles, a thousand opportunities to flee."
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, perhaps an introduction is in order. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, perhaps you are in the wrong profession."
"Fighting with a large army under your command is nowise different from fighting with a small one: whatever the size, make sure they are all between you and the enemy"
"Having good subordinates and learning how to delegate is half the battle. And if what you are delegating is responsibility for the defeat, it can be all the battle."
"In war as in peace, he who would seek promotion must learn to bend over in order to touch the sky."
The Great Sage Hsuang Tzu said to the General Sun Tzu after watching him defeat the combined armies of Lu Shun and Cheng Po "Wow, that was great boss! Great! You must be the greatest general that ever lived!"
"In war, there is no situation too dire or problem too thorny that you can't run away from it."
"If your opponent is of choleric temperament, seek to irritate him. If your opponent is of pacific temperament, seek to pacify him. If your opponent is of calculating temperament, seek to hire him as your accountant."
"To know your Enemy, you must become your Enemy. Once you have become your Enemy, surrender immediately, and declare a great victory!"
"A careful general keeps one foot in the stirrup, even when urinating."
"A man who is destined for true greatness is the man who takes personal responsibility for all things around him; except those things that fail."
"When the Emperor comes to review the field of victory, it is most auspicious to present to him the head of the enemy commander for inspection. If the head of the enemy commander is not available, any suitable looking head will do."
"A good general anticipates all outcomes. A wise general anticipates all ways out."
"If one prevaricates long enough, the very stones of the citadel will turn to dust."
"A good leader doesn't fix what isn't broken. A great leader breaks it in order to fix it and take the credit for it."
"It is not enough to suck up; one must also push down."
"It is only necessary to leave the burning palace the moment before the ceiling comes crashing down."
"It is good to pull oneself up by one's bootstraps. It is even better to pull oneself up by someone else's bootstraps."
"A coward, in victory, struts and brays. A coward, in defeat, changes sides, then struts and brays."
"When the council is about to make a decision after months of fruitless deliberation, it is time to add new members."
"Sublime is the little thrill I feel when an arrow or a responsibility whizzes by just past my ear."
"The gazelle leading at the front is trampled by those behind. The gazelle following at the rear lags and is eaten by tigers. When the herd smells fear and sharply changes direction, it is the gazelle in the very middle who finds that his position has not changed in all of the chaos."
"Regrettably, someone has to stay here and watch the fortress."
"After I crossed the river, I cried real tears when I burned the last bridge between myself and my routed army."
"It is hard to describe how honored I felt when I was told that, as the Emperor Li Ping was being impaled on his banner over the gate of his own fortress, the last thing he did was look up into the sky and scream out my name."
"One can die a thousand deaths and still live in great comfort."
"Time spent coming to know is better spent appearing to know."
"It is not what is important but who thinks it is important that counts."
"When the gates of Fu Lan fell to the invader, the Mayor Ling Po fled with the treasury and thus burdened was overtaken and slain. Ling Po was a fool. The time to flee with the treasury is before the war even begins!"
"It is inappropriate to hide one's light under a bushel. On the other hand, if one can hide one's rival's light under a bushel, why not?"
"The man who said that good bookkeeping was both an art and a science was lying about the science part."
"Beware of getting your tongue caught in the Emperor's shoe strings."
"Hold faithfulness and sincerity as first principles. Lying and vacillation are strong seconds."
"The perfect magistrate is both cruel and just."
"With focus and practice, one can learn to have silently left the room before the valuable vase strikes the ground."
"In justice consistency is all important. A magistrate can be as arbitrary as he wishes, as long as he is consistently arbitrary."
"The truly incorruptible command the highest price."
"In government, I have burned down many a house to hide a stain I made on the carpet.
"A wise general makes sure that his supply line runs through his counting room."
"The people glorify the hero and revile the villain. But the one they imitate is the mediocrity."
"In war, it is better to eat your last groom than your last horse."
"Who says that the leech must work harder than the hippopotamus?"
"I knew that I had achieved perfect harmony between power and responsibility when I had acquired the highest civil and military offices in the land and yet I could spend the entire day discussing whether I should wear the yellow gown with the red shoes or the red gown with the yellow shoes."
"To achieve a life of perfect simplicity, it is only necessary to reach the place where the answer to every question is "As you say, Majesty."
"A truly determined official can hang on by his very lips."
"If the emperor cannot see it, it does not exist."
"More gravity is necessary the higher one rises"
"The floor in front of the throne feels pleasantly cool against my forehead."
"You may call me a worm that grovels on its belly. But say what you will, in the end it is the worm that conquers the man."
"The skillful general chooses his field of battle with deception in mind. It is considered
the height of generalship for the enemy be so fooled as to not turn up."
"The Son of Heaven rails against the supplicant's hollow flattery. Bribery, on the other hand is very well received."
"A pound of gold weighs much more than a ton of assurances."
"When climbing in society, a ladder made of skulls may not be very attractive, but it works quite well."
"When you learn to kill the messenger, all the news turns good."
"The chain of command is like the melting snows of the Himalayas. Blame,
like orders, flow in but one direction..."
"The virtuous army is the embodiment of equanimity. Avoiding artificial distinctions, they sack friend and foe alike"
"When interrogating witnesses, a good magistrate should severely flog the guilty and the innocent alike, just to be fair."
"I do not know the future. But I do know a desirable forecast when I see one."
"When I picked up my brush to write to the Emperor, my rival suddenly felt the back of his neck begin to tingle."
"A wise courtier finds things for the Emperor that he has not lost."
"The best place to dig for your prisoner's valuables is under his fingernails."
:"As long as the peasants like the music, they won't pay any attention to the instruments."
"I send out my tax collectors and the peasants curse and revile them and throw dung at them. Then I flog my tax collectors and give the peasants half their money back and they hail me as their hero."
"When I have 10,000 faithful soldiers at my back, I know that we are all facing in the wrong direction."
"When you see the smoke from the enemy's camp rising from the distant hills, it is time to prepare for battle. When you see it rising from within your own walls, it is probably too late to prepare."
"For most men, true immortality is more fleeting than the desire for true immortality."
"The box that carries the tax receipts from the provinces to the capital always leaks."
"In endeavors involving money, be prudent when asking for assistance. One chopstick may be too few, but three chopsticks may be too many."
"Be careful about looking into things that do not concern you. Many an imperial eunuch began life as a young man who was simply curious about what goes on in the harem."
"I never think about those who laughed at me as I began my rise to ultimate power. Who knows where they are now?"
"It can always be worse. And if it isn't, you can always make it worse."
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Unagidon, if you could be scheduled, I could kick my Dilbert habit. "Rip, rip, rip the Chipmunk off the field."
Gao Li Ji is almost as bad as Sum Ting Wong or Ho Lee Fuk.
Big thumbs up.
Hu Nu indeed. You made this up, u.
A New York City edition was published a decade ago by U Neva No Press.
I've accumulated a massive collection of these based on my 25 years of working for large corporations. At some memorable meetings or conferences, I've been inspired to create up to half a dozen.
You really ought to go public with this, u. Publish! :-) Include a whole biography of Gen. Gao. Must have been a fascinating man. I wonder if deep in the stacks of the Vatican library there isn't an ancient copy of his work. Surely Dan Brown is familiar with it.
I'm afraid both Unagidon and Commonweal will be hearing from lawyers/consul generals just like TV stations are being sued by Asiana airlines over slurs on the pilots names. [ e.g. Tu Low Fli ]
too bad ..with the Commonweal new format and all.. U is anonymous but will Commonweal 'give him up'?? (-: and Ann O seems ready to launch a leaky boat.
If anyone sues me, it should be the US Chamber of Commerce.
Ed --
So what the boat leaks? I'm sure the General will adjust.
Gao Lee Ji sounds almost like a precursor of the young communist soldier Lei Feng who devoted his life to doing anonymous good deeds, recording them in a secret journal since his innate modesty and altruism forbade him from taking credit for such acts of goodness. Fortunately, a fair number of his anonymous acts of kindness were somehow recorded on film, presumably by equally modest and anonymous photogaphers. After his death at the age of 21 (he was killed by a falling telephone pole as he sought to give directions to a truck backing up), the Maoists launched the "Emulate Lei Feng" movement, holding him up as a model citizen (and they still trundle him out when the occasion demands). Unfortunately it seems that in today's China, not only are there many who make fun of him as a put-on by the regime, but perhaps even deny that he ever really existed (this despite his honored tomb; check it out on Wikipedia). But then what can you expect in our cynical and faithless age? There may be even be those who doubt the historical existence of Gao! -- O tempora, O mores, and all that sort of thing.
Lei was all altruism; Gao's maxims sound more self-interested and self promoting, of course. But then he came from what Chinese call the corrupt era of feudalism, while Lei embodied the virtues of selfless modern socialism.
Lei Feng kind of reminds one of Elvis, does he not? People need saints.


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I have been playing the Spec Ops Survival mode map "Resistance" for a while now, and I keep dying when all the juggernauts start coming! what is the best gun to deal with them quickly? Some people say using C4 is the best way, is this true?
Grenade launchers ('noob toobs'), sniper rifles, C4, and other explosives are all pretty useful, but what you need the most is time.
If you can find a place where you can see them at a range, or you can glitch them into staying away from you, you'll survive a lot longer. I've killed quite a few juggernauts in co-op with a friend, and usually I'd be the 'bait' while he laid down somewhere out of the way with a sniper rifle and laid into them. When I could I'd find a place to hide and shoot them with explosive weapons, or, in a pinch, an LMG.
There are some areas where you can let your friend 'die' and they will keep the juggernauts busy while you kill them. The most popular is to block a doorway with your co-op buddy's downed body. You have to revive the buddy every so often so that you don't lose the match, however.
In Modern Warfare 2, I also found that juggernauts would freeze if they were unable to path to me - hiding under a table helped, for instance. They'd just stand there, unable to determine how to get to me, and I'd snipe them in the head over and over again.
If co-op "cheesing" them isn't an option, and/or you've got cash to burn, there are a few weapons and special items that can help:
Flash grenades are the surprise winners here - they can stun a Juggernaut (and in the riot shielder's case, cause him to drop his defenses) so that you can go for headshots without taking damage. Also, since the Juggernaut(s) aren't firing, the effectiveness of your other items is also increased. The only downside is that their head tends to move while they're stunned, making headshots harder.
While costly, the most effective method I've been using are predator missiles.
The nice thing about Juggernauts are that they are dumb.
If I'm on my own, I shoot and scoot. I move around and as they follow me they wander into pre-positioned claymores, dynamically positioned C4 and just good old rifle fire. Once they are nice and bunched up I drop a Predator on them (or if I'm feeling particularly flush, an Air Strike. Expensive, but satisfying).
In co-op, we practice fire and manouver. One person rails into them while the other runs away. Again, after a minute or two of this, one of us drops a predator on them as by then they are normally bunched up.
The fundamental part of both of these is to move in a fashion that you can predict their next path. Don't run away too far or they might split and travel towards you from different angles - a DISASTER.
These tactics also work well with the Juggernaut / Troops combo. Be sure to keep moving and focus on killing the troops - just ignore the juggernauts until the environment is clear. I also try and keep the Juggernauts away from my turrets - they don't seem to do that much damage and they are expensive to replace.
Finally - keep a cool head. Be patient with them and don't panic! :)
1 flash grenade, 1 striker clip, 1 dead juggernaut. Way cheaper than predator, just don't let them get together
As a solo player, in my view a combination of claymores, which are after all cheaper than C4, and leading them around until they are all moving together works best. Depending on how close they are to each other, you may even kill all three before you run out of claymores. Place them just around a corner; don't leave them in plain sight, or the Juggernauts will shoot them.
Use cars with the claymores if there are any on the map - set the claymore so it will blow up the car when tripped. For example, on Resistance, lead them into the centre street, plant a claymore in the road behind the bumper of a car at 45 degrees (i.e. facing the corner formed between the bumper and the sidewalk), then duck into the apartment. Juggernaut walks down pavement, detonates claymore, claymore detonates car. Only doable once, of course.
Once you're out of claymores, find the longest sightline you can, lure them to one end, sprint to the other, lie down and put lead downrange. Alternatively, you may find a Striker will finish all three up close in a single load if none have actually died from the claymore assault course.
Just drop 5-6 C4's right under the chopper and when he hits the ground, blow them. Instant kill. Just make sure he is on the ground first, or else it is a waste.
The best way to kill juggs is with the MP7. One clip to the face and regular/riotshield juggs die, two maybe three clips for those huge juggs that come in the later rounds. If you don't hit them in the head with the whole clip it usually weakens them enough that a knife or two will finish them.
In my experience, I have found that taking your time and letting them follow you, with 1 teammate head-shotting with a sniper too, is the best way to do things.
Basically, in resistance, if you are at the center street, you will find that the juggernaut will drop down right next to a car (the blue one). Once he drops and looks for you, stand on the opposite side of the car and shoot his head. Once you shoot him continuously through the top of the car, he will drop dead! (Through the whole thing he will most likely not shoot you as much as running right at him/her!
I put two claymores on the side of the door for both doors. Maximum 7 on any map. That takes out two, and a predator missile takes out the last.
Or, just go up to it flash and shoot and done - three juggs dead.
So far the best special op soloplay on mw3 is bakara- the insane level one, why? because you have a hiding spot, there are two bldgs that you can hide in their second floor, one is close to where you can get explosives, the other is close to air support. very rarely will an enemy climb the second floor but it's far better than having enemies coming from all directions. As it turns out, juggernauts are not that difficult to kill-- you need machine guns and I mean two of them! buy the sleight hand for fast reloading- normally ppl get killed while reloading, this one does it fast. fire up a flash bang then blast that son of a bitch in the head. now when you have multiples with air support at the same time, what I do is I buy the riot shield squad a level in advance (ie if they are coming on level 11 I buy riot shield squad before level 10) then as soon as I send them down, I also buy a predator drone... I go upstairs to my safe-location, riotshield guys kill the other regular enemies and I send a predator missile to one of the juggernauts as soon as he gets off the chopper, one less juggernaut to kill makes a happy game.
In Resistance no ammo is needed. Just go in the restaurant and box area, lead him to it, and melee him. Run to the other side and he'll shoot, however he will miss often. Be quick.
I normally get squads and predators for them.
A headshot with the Rocket launcher should kill a juggernaut with a single shot.
One MSR 360 sniper shot kills 2 juggernauts.
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I'm not sure if this question is on-topic - if not, feel free to close. Also, if it'd be a better question for another StackExchange site, I can ask it elsewhere.
I was wondering why SQL places the
SELECT clause first.
SELECT [attribute]
FROM [table]
WHERE [condition]
My understanding is that the database engine starts with the
FROM and goes from there -
SELECT is the last thing that is processed.
Is there a specific issue that the designers placed under consideration when making this decision?
Personally, I tend to glaze over the
SELECT and look at the
FROM clause first. It seems more intuitive to me to list the origin first. LINQ, for example, does this.
var table = from [table]
where [condition]
select [attribute];
Isn't this the case even in relational algebra? (I'm using the notation of RA)
\project_{[attribute]}( \select_{[condition]}( [table] ) )
The expression is evaluated inside-out (granted, the notation isn't declarative, it's functional). So why is SQL different?


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Leading by Example: Alumni
Many Shades of Green
Albion College's alumni magazine, Io Triumphe!, recently contacted Albion alumni to ask them about how they are practicing or promoting sustainability in their professional and personal lives. In addition to those who have launched green businesses and provided leadership for environmental initiatives in civic life, we heard from alumni who walk or ride bicycles wherever possible, who grow and preserve their own food, and who have installed green energy solutions and otherwise retrofitted their homes for greater efficiency. We hope you enjoy reading these stories.
Biodiversity is my byword. I am a professor in biological sciences at the University of Alberta. I got my start in ecology working with Dr. Clara Dixon at Albion in 1972. The economy of western Canada is based on natural resources, and for the last 25 years, my students and I have been researching how natural populations of fishes, amphibians, and birds can be conserved in the face of agriculture, energy development, and forestry. I have also served on scientific advisory committees for the province of Alberta, Ducks Unlimited Canada, and Parks Canada. I am a member of the national Committee on the Status of Endangered Wildlife in Canada as a specialist on amphibians and reptiles. Some of my recent projects have concerned the effects of oil and gas wells on prairie songbirds, habitat requirements of water birds and frogs in agricultural landscapes, and construction of tunnels to reduce road mortality of salamanders in Waterton Lakes National Park.
—Cindy Paszkowski, '74
On our home we have a solar panel array providing 40 percent of our home electricity. We also installed a solar thermal system to heat our hot water. Most recently, we added Vortex solar pool heating so our pool is heated by the sun only. We also replaced all light bulbs with high-efficiency bulbs and have replaced our old appliances with high-efficiency models. We added a "power manager" to our fuse box to regulate flow and reduce energy surges. In total, our electric and gas bills have been reduced about 50 percent. One goal of the photovoltaics project is to generate enough energy to run our 1971 VW Super Beetle after we convert it to a 100% electric vehicle. We're having fun thinking of new ways to reduce our footprint! Just this year, our house was recognized by the city of Maumee, Ohio—we won the "green improvement" home award!
—Jodi Haney, '84
The Grand Hotel, which I serve as president, provides modern conveniences to visitors while protecting the environment and maintaining the 19th-century charm for which the hotel is known around the world. A recent initiative installed a water-based air conditioning system that cools hotel rooms while producing hot water for the hotel. The electric bill actually goes down in warm weather because the system is a more efficient heat source than the boiler. Every grass clipping, weed, and flower that is taken from the grounds when the growing season is over is used in a compost pile for the hotel's signature flower beds. Energy-efficient light bulbs are used throughout, and guests have options on the frequency of linen exchange. For these and other efforts, the Grand Hotel was named a Green Lodging Michigan Leader by the Michigan Department of Energy, Labor, and Economic Growth.
—Dan Musser, '86
Educating others about a sustainable world and issues like global climate change has been a strong focus in my life for the past 30 years. I am a professor emerita of biology at Monroe Community College in Rochester, N.Y. From 1980 to 2005 (when I retired) I had the opportunity to teach a biology course titled "The Human Environment" to non-science major students each semester; it was a great way to introduce environmental concepts, interdependency among all living things, and looming issues like global climate change. I also incorporated sustainability concepts in other courses, such as botany. For years, as an active member of the United Church of Christ (UCC), I was frustrated by the lack of leadership from churches on stewardship of the earth. In 2002, I began an interfaith environmental group called "Living in Harmony in God's World" with my pastor. Our primary focus has been education on various environmental issues and networking with other faith communities. We have also encouraged membership in New York's Interfaith Power and Light, part of a national organization committed to helping faith communities reduce their energy footprint.
—Elizabeth Yoki Pixley, '62
Two years ago, my husband and I seized on the opportunity to sell our large home in La Mesa, Calif., to our kids so we could build our 1,200-sq.-ft. retirement "Grammy Flat" on the lower part of the property. Located east of San Diego, we don't suffer the severe winter cold of the northern or eastern states; however, we do have to endure scorching heat in the summertime, with temperatures often reaching 100 degrees or higher for a week or two at a time. Temperatures of 90 degrees or more all summer are the norm. We built our home using structural insulated panels (SIPs) on the roof, walls, and floors. SIPs are 6-inch thick panels made of two pieces of 3/8" oriented strand board separated by foam insulation. They meet or exceed all fire, structural, and earthquake standards. We had a full-house air conditioning and heating system installed but rarely use it.
—Mickey Dodge Madigan Harper, '64
Since 1991 I have been leading the land conservation movement in Washtenaw County. I started the Legacy Land Conservancy, I've been instrumental in six successful land preservation ballot campaigns that have raised over $100 million of public funds, and I've operated local preservation programs. We have protected nearly 4,000 acres so far. All of these efforts are geared toward protecting drinking water sources, wildlife habitat, and prime farmland around Ann Arbor to provide a means of living sustainably in the area. One of my current projects is to transform a publicly-owned 150-acre farm property into an incubator for beginning small farmers that will ultimately provide locally-grown produce for schools, restaurants, and businesses. In addition I've been growing much of my own food and processing it for 15 years, and I maintain a one-acre prairie restoration on my property. I also lead natural history hikes and paddling trips for local non-governmental organizations.
—Barry Lonik, '83
I am the co-founder of Green Earth Technologies (GET), a totally green clean tech company in Celebration, Fla. Based on its philosophy that consumers should not have to give up value or performance in order to advance sustainability, GET combines domestically sourced renewable feed stocks and base oils (from animal and plant sources grown in the U.S.) with proprietary technologies molded around the four ideologies of being green: biodegradable, renewable, recyclable, and environmentally safe. If a label says, "Warning, harmful or fatal if swallowed," then there is a good chance that it is not safe for pets, plants, or our planet either. Our lubricants and cleaning products, all rated as non-hazardous, degrade from 70 percent to 95 percent within nine days, and they are marketed in bottles made with 30 percent post-consumer recyclable plastic.
—Jeff Loch, '84
I am corporate social responsibility manager for REI, a national retail co-op focused on getting people actively engaged in human-powered recreation and stewardship. I work with partners around the co-op and with external stakeholders to develop and implement sustainable business strategies and tactics that drive efficiency, innovation, and environmental benefit in REI's operations and enable the co-op to thrive in a resource-constrained world. My main focuses are strategies around climate change, waste reduction, sustainable forestry, and green building.
—Kirk Myers, '99
Goodwill Industries of Greater Grand Rapids, where I am on staff, has been reusing community donations to put individuals with barriers to employment to work. In addition to reusing community donations, Goodwill in Grand Rapids is also an avid recycler of unsold donations. Every donation that comes through the door is either sold or recycled. Since 2009 Goodwill's recycling program has salvaged over 10 million pounds of textiles and recycled over 7 million pounds of unsold materials. By doing this, Goodwill was able to reduce its volume at the landfill by 40 percent and waste expenses by 34 percent. Every dollar earned from Goodwill's recycling efforts trains and places people with barriers to employment into the greater Grand Rapids workforce.
—Jill Eggebrecht Wallace, '97
Cherokee Creek Boys School is a therapeutic boarding school for middle school boys, ages 11-15, who struggle academically, emotionally, psychologically, and/or socially. We believe that nature is a powerful teacher, and our campus is intentionally located in the woods of the Blue Ridge Mountains in South Carolina. We combine academics, therapy, and recreation to create a learning and healing environment for our students. As the founder, my commitment is to teach boys to become global citizens. All boys discover the value of environmental stewardship through a year-round environmental studies class, participation in our TREKS (weekend wilderness) program, and math and language arts classes that integrate environmental education into their curriculum. We also volunteer in community service projects with the U.S. Forest Service, state parks, Oconee Heritage Museum, Chattooga River Conservancy, and the South Carolina Department of Natural Resources.
—Beth Thompson Black, '71
As an ordained American Baptist pastor, I have been involved in eco-justice issues since 1986, working with the Eco-Justice Working Group of the National Council of Churches, the National Religious Coalition on Creation Care, and Interfaith Power and Light. In 2000, we started a statewide, interfaith network in Connecticut, the Interreligious Eco-Justice Network, and I do climate change presentations around New England, following the principles of The Climate Project founded by Al Gore. I've been doing this work for a long, long time in religious communities in the churches I've served and around the country. Finally, congregations are catching on that care of creation is part of our faith.
—Tom Carr, '80
As vice president of strategic marketing for national homebuilder PulteGroup, I plan communities in the desert southwest. Pulte's Villa Trieste is the first LEED-certified residential community in Las Vegas and an example of a community leading the way in energy efficiency and sustainability. We worked with the U.S. Department of Energy, University of Nevada, Las Vegas, and Nevada Energy as grant and research partners. All homes are built with advanced sustainability features including integrated solar roof tiles, tankless water heaters, low-e windows, high-efficiency air conditioning, and an energy monitoring dashboard that works online or with a smart phone. The result is a home that's more comfortable to live in and has less impact on the environment than a typical home. Based on its sustainable design for Villa Trieste, Pulte Homes was the 2009 recipient of the Outstanding Production Builder Award from the U.S. Green Building Council.
—Ken Johnson, '84
I am currently an environmental education and preventative health volunteer with the Peace Corps in Senegal, West Africa. I have been here since March 2010 and will serve for two years in a small village (600 people, no electricity/running water) in northern Senegal. The Peace Corps is dedicated to fully integrating volunteers into communities and providing aid in a sustainable way through education so that development projects do not end when the volunteer goes home. Part of my job as an environmental education volunteer is to enable sustainable development and environmental health education within Senegal. I have worked closely with the elementary school in my village, promoting environmental awareness and good nutrition with children through a demonstration garden and tree nursery, as well as organizing an environmental club that will in the future be doing environmental lessons in cooperation with the teachers. I also work with the local health hut educating women about maternal/child health and nutrition.
—Sarah Keyes, '09
As an environmental attorney since 1981, I have provided legal counsel to business clients on a full range of environmental issues including: water and air permits, chemical regulation, site remediation, and government enforcement actions. That core practice has expanded into the issues associated with "green" products, climate change, and corporate sustainability. In 2009, I obtained LEED AP accreditation. My focus is on a more aggressive and critical analysis of "green" claims made by manufacturers, suppliers, and marketers. I have challenged the hype surrounding "sustainable" design, by encouraging contracting parties and investors to use contract terms tied to measurable requirements that can be validated by independent third parties. This is a necessary evolution as industry moves from merely appearing environmentally sensitive, toward a world where companies are legally bound to meet specific environmental benchmarks.
—Susan Sadler, '77
In my classroom I try to get my students thinking about staying local and going green. We read Barbara Kingsolver's Animal Dreams in my junior English classes. During that unit, I have them do a local food assignment. We talk about the benefits of eating local, examine statistics about the effects of food being shipped across the country vs. buying it from your neighbor. We read excerpts from Kingsolver's Animal, Vegetable, Miracle and other good articles about the locavore movement. After all of the research, the students create a menu for one day's meals using only local sources. The students struggle with finding ingredients for three meals from a 50-mile radius, but they really get into it.
—Cara Schinkel Arver, '94
In 2007, I was the general manager of the Perry Hotel in Petoskey when we became the first hotel in Michigan to receive the Green Lodging Michigan Leader designation. We also worked with many other hotels along the way to help them gain their designation.
—David Marvin, '97
As an international business law professor at Michigan State University, I teach a course on "Environmental Law and Sustainability for Business," and I include units on sustainable development in all of my other courses. Sustainable economic growth is a key element in the "triple bottom line" of environmental, social, and economic sustainability. For the past four years, the environmental law course has been included in MSU's RISE program (Residential Initiatives in the Study of the Environment). I negotiated getting the Broad College of Business on board as a participant with RISE two years ago. Also, my course is one of the first courses approved for MSU's new sustainability specialization, which became available to students this academic year. In addition, amazing things are happening with the Spartan Global Development Fund, a student-run organization which I advise. We began with four loans on July 4, 2009, reached 179 loans on July 4, 2010, and the number keeps growing. Moreover, my students focus on microloans to women in developing countries. This fund was honored with a 2010 Lewis Quality of Excellence Award at MSU. In short, I have been active in my own classes, my college, and in the broader MSU community. My Web site, www.tradeandsustainability.com, has more information.
—Paulette Stenzel, '72
In my 40 years of oceanographic research in the North Pacific Ocean, I have assisted in assuring the sustainability of some of the largest fisheries in the U.S. I studied the physical oceanography of the Gulf of Alaska to understand how it operates and how the water climate varies. The work informs managers on how to sustain these fisheries. We discovered the largest freshwater system in North America, more than 1.5 times the flow in the Mississippi River. It is fed by intense coastal rainfall and melting glaciers and serves as the major pathway for migrating salmon in the North Pacific. Also, the Exxon Valdez oil spill took place within this freshwater coastal current. I have retired from the University of Alaska and now live on Maui where I am attempting to help sustain the coral reefs here that are critical to Hawaii in so many ways.
—Tom Royer, '63
I live in a rural community that does not have a recycling program. However, my office is 'in town' where the curbside program picks up every other Friday. My daughter is 6 now, and she knows that 1-7 printed on the bottom of a container means that we can recycle that plastic. If she sees something in the trash that should be recycled, we hear about it and must correct the situation. Last week my suitcase carried home two newspapers and three plastic bottles so that they could go in "the bin" instead of in "the can." No one wants to live next to a landfill yet so many people conveniently throw away items that could be recycled. I believe it is my responsibility to do my best, and in this regard that means being a good steward of this planet. We only have one!
—Kimberly Johnson Christner, '91
Shortly after I graduated from Albion with a degree in German for the professions, I moved to Rostock, Germany. One day I came across an interesting job advertisement. Nordex Energy, a company in Norderstedt that produces wind energy turbines, was looking for someone to translate and interpret for the entire American team that was currently residing here. The Americans were here because Nordex is building a brand new production plant for Nordex USA in Jonesboro, Ark. I was thrilled to be a part of something so big, and went about learning all the technical vocabulary and have spent the last months doing my part to support effective intercultural communication between these German and American counterparts. It has been amazing, and it's all for a very green cause!
—Kathryn Wachter Schinkel, '09
My husband, Steven, and I moved to Vermont and founded True Love Farm in 2003. The farm provides organically grown vegetables to more than 200 households each week, participating in three farmer's markets in southwestern Vermont. The farm is committed to sustainable growing practices, an example of which is our use of a wood furnace that fuels both our primary greenhouse as well as our home (a 200-year-old barn converted into living space), which is also supported by solar hot water panels. I recently resigned from my position as dean of advancement for Southern Vermont College to join Steven on the farm full-time. Business is growing, and there feels like endless demand for the farm's extensive line of vegetables and flowers. We frequently host groups of young people for hands-on learning opportunities, including the local high school's "Youth Agriculture Project," and students from Upward Bound at Southern Vermont College. We additionally provide vegetables to a nearby school district, where "meet the farmer" lunches are an annual event.
—Karen Scheibner Trubitt, '87
Often referred to as "The Barn Lady," I write/edit the Michigan Barn Preservation Network's newsletter and devote many hours to encouraging people to give new life to old barns as an advocate for these spirit-renewing structures. As agriculture has changed, America's barns have suffered. Built from the 1700s to the early 20th century, these history-bearers, constructed of virgin timber and stone, have the potential to lead amazing new lives. They can be adapted to modern agriculture, and they are particularly suited to today's organic and small family farms. They can be lifted, moved, dismantled, and rebuilt. They can be adapted to become B&Bs, galleries, studios, restaurants, offices, churches, museums, and homes. As preservationists have argued for years, restoring and reusing historic structures also contributes mightily to sustainable living.
—Jan Corey Arnett, '74
Since retiring from Michigan State University after three decades as a faculty member and administrator, I have served as host of "Greening of the Great Lakes" on WJR-Radio. The weekly program, which explores issues related to environmental, economic, and socio-cultural sustainability, is a collaborative effort between WJR and MSU. Topics range from invasive species to the construction of "green" buildings to the development of energy-efficient automobiles that will reduce our dependency on foreign oil. Unlike the vitriolic "attack" radio so common today, I encourage my guests to share their expertise so that my listeners can make informed, thoughtful decisions about some of the key environmental issues of our day.
—Kirk Heinze, '70
In the early 1980s, the United States Coast Guard (USCG) had a dilemma. It was how to catch ships dumping wastes and petroleum products while at sea, thereby avoiding portage fees at docks. Working at the USCG laboratories in Groton, Conn., I helped them develop a new methodology for chemically separating these pollutants. Then by using special wavelengths of ultraviolet light with visible blocking filters, we could then document the chemical fingerprint of the pollutants photographically. This technique was so refined that oil from any well in the world could be pinpointed because of the wells' different signatures. This breakthrough for the USCG allowed them to take samples from our polluted beaches and seaways for analysis, visualization, and documentation and then board the suspecting dumper ship to take samples for analysis. When the samples matched, the ship's captain was arrested for illegal dumping. The USCG reported success at all their 100 stations in the U.S. in controlling environmental damage to our waterways and beaches by using this newly developed technology.
—Richard Vitek, '56
I leave my car in the driveway as much as possible. I walk two miles back and forth to work. When I have appointments in Boston, I walk two miles to Harvard Square and then take the subway into Boston. My 2000 Hyundai, with California emission standards, has 38,000 miles on it, and I received a $61 low-mileage-return on my car insurance this year. I am president of Trees for Watertown, a citizens' nonprofit that advocates for the planting and care of our street trees. (See our new web site www.TreesForWatertown.org). Right now we have taken on NSTAR, our electric utility company, for coming into town and hacking our trees away from the electrical wires. We are working to change their trimming standards, which are actually applied throughout all the United States. Last year when a town project threatened to remove two 50-ft. trees that stand at the edge of the property where I live (I rent), I represented my landlady and lobbied to preserve them. I was successful in striking a compromise with the town so that the property where they stand was not taken by eminent domain. In the summer those shade trees are my air conditioner, protecting the house from the scorching sun and making it unnecessary for me to run an air conditioner and sometimes even a fan.
—Ruth Thomasian, '66
Upon graduating from Albion College in 1988 as a political science/anthropology major, I found myself in Northern California supporting a group of folks trying to protect our country's last intact redwood forest from being clear-cut. This effort inspired me to move to Washington, D.C. to work on the political side of protecting forests (including this redwood stand that still exists today, thanks to a group of dedicated environmentalists and some legislation that took 10 years to pass). Eventually I founded my own forest protection organization before shifting careers in 1999 to become a financial advisor. The Wall Street Journal recently referred to me as "the go-to guy for socially responsible investing." I now work with many clients dedicated to making the world a cleaner and safer place to live.
—Jon Ellenbogen, '88
We were looking for a more eco-friendly way to manage get-togethers and to switch our two children from using plastic cups to glassware. We were bothered by waste that resulted from mixing up beverages and throwing misplaced drinks away. So, we created our own labels to identify "whose is whose" and started My Drink Label (www.mydrinklabel.com). My Drink Label products are reusable, environmentally friendly, and economical.
—Mark Sherwood, '91, and Saralyn Coupe, '91
Through my landscape design company, ecoChic, my clients and I search for ecologically-sustainable and good-looking garden solutions for their problems. My work incorporates installing rain barrels, drip irrigation, bioswales, use of native and hardy plants, and designing for low inputs/outputs and water quality. Educating the public is important because we are returning to a landscaping ethic not seen since before World War II—as I call it: saving the planet one garden at a time.
—Laura Zigmanth, '84
We're not 'leading' in any big way, but have for years used our bicycles for most local trips, generally 10-15 miles round trip. We are even gaining some notoriety, with a newspaper article calling us the 'elderly couple on bicycles' here in Cleveland.
—Dick, '52, and Martha Burns
As the owner of Maid Brigade of Central New Jersey, I am proud to be a green leader in the cleaning industry. In 2007 the house cleaning service launched its proprietary Green Clean Certified® service to protect the health of the families it serves and its employees as well as reduce damage to our environment caused by the cleaning industry. Many consumers are not aware of the potential health risks associated with common cleaning products and methods, but there is increasing scientific evidence of illnesses caused by chemicals in cleaning products. Children are the most vulnerable to these risks. Maid Brigade is not only the first cleaning service to "go green" but the only cleaning service to dedicate itself to consumer education and advocacy on this topic so that all consumers can make informed purchasing decisions for their families.
—Ellen Workman Crawford, '75
You wouldn't think of disposable health care products as green, but when the product reduces the quantity of product disposed and at the same time improves patient care, it's a win-win. I manage and develop the Ultrasorbs family of disposable absorbent products at Medline Industries, Inc. Ultrasorbs (www.medline.com) reduces product needed to manage moisture, and in turn reduces packaging (plastic and cardboard), raw materials, and fuel used to make and transport these traditional products. More importantly, while reducing waste, Ultrasorbs also manages some of the conditions that cause pressure ulcers (bed sores) to develop in hospitals and nursing homes. Preventing pressure ulcers helps save lives and reduces health care costs—it costs hospitals on average $43,000 to treat one.
—Scott Smith, '00
Based in Berkeley, Calif., I am a business advisor to Earth 2017, a small sustainability consultancy (www.earth2017.com) as well as an advisor to 3rd Rock Systems, a renewable energy firm (www.3rdrock.us). In addition, I am currently the chairman of the board of the Berkeley Chamber of Commerce, a green organization itself, and we play a key role in driving policy engagement around the green economy. We are also a stakeholder in the East Bay Green Corridor, a regional collaboration of local governments, educational and research institutions, and businesses that bring research, thought leadership, policy, entrepreneurship, and practice to this emerging green economy.
—Rod Howard, '83
I've been green since the 1960s! My husband and I only had bicycles for the first two years of our marriage (our last two years at Albion). We did our grocery shopping even back then with cloth bags. I started the Albion Food Coop in the '70s, and it continued to be in existence long after we left Albion. It continued operation until a couple of years ago—over 35 years of folks using their own containers and buying healthy food in bulk. My husband and I were directors of an environmental education center in Appalachia for a time. Recently I started a "ban the plastic bag" project with at-risk kids for our community. Reuse has been my mantra.
—Carol Voigts, '63
Like any true change, my journey of embracing creation was a gradual one. I began working at the L. Perrigo company in the quality control lab shortly after my graduation in 2002. My work helped dramatically change the way technicians identified raw materials in the lab. They went from using classic wet chemistry tests on every sample bag to barely being exposed to the sample itself because it could now be scanned without even being removed from the plastic bag. We reduced the technicians' risk, reduced the need for reagents, and reduced waste to almost zero for approved materials. And if the story ended there it would be a good one, but as it turns out it was only the beginning. After five years as a chemist, I felt a strong internal push to seminary and a life of vocational ministry. I spent the last three years studying the scriptures, and I am certain of this: God loves us and his creation very much. As a Christian, I want to love the things God loves. I want to be on the leading edge of sustainability. We have taken a few steps as a family to this end: one-car family, cloth diapers, a few meatless meals, eating mostly local foods. As a leader of a Christian community, I want to faithfully preach from the scriptures and encourage others to live more sustainably too. I care for creation, not because Al Gore says I should, but because the earth is the Lord's.
—Chad Thoreson, '02
I am currently managing a master-planned resort community, which at its core features an 18-hole Jack Nicklaus Signature Golf Course. The plan calls for a 530-acre mixed use residential, retail, spa, and hotel development, spanning parts of Benton Harbor, St. Joseph, and Benton Charter Township. Partners have invested more than $70 million in the project to date. When we started in 2007, the weeds were as high as my Jeep, and we saw beer bottles, hundreds of tires, etc. The project removed over 117,000 tons of trash, solid waste, and concrete from the site, including 20,000 tons of contaminated soils. That's one football field stacked up 65 feet or the equivalent of a seven-story building. Once you cleared away the trash, there was beautiful land underneath! The success of the cleanup was measured by the nature that returned. Sandhill cranes came to the property for the first time in 2008. By June 2009, rose-pink—a species native to the region—was growing on the property, and sandpipers and ducklings were spotted crossing the ponds in the wetlands. Truly a green, one-of-a kind real estate development!
—Kerry Wright, '02
To me the important "green leaders" are the people who do little things every day. We've installed energy-efficient windows, but it's those little things anyone can do that really add up. We zealously reuse and recycle. Flow restrictors in the shower halve the amount of hot water used. I invested less than $100 in lights, mirrors, and panniers to turn my bike into my primary vehicle 5-6 months per year. And we replaced our pontoon boat, which used only 40 gallons of gas per summer, with kayaks that use none. We use trains when we can for long-distance travel. Greener, healthier, and more fun, too—can't beat that.
—Jan Sperry Baumgras, '73


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Police assist
Sault Police were called to the 600 block of W. Portage Thursday evening to assist Child Protective Services with the removal of three children from a residence. All three children were taken into protective custody under the court order without incident, allowing police to close the books on this matter.
Location, ST | website.com


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I have this server I administer. I have some users that have email accounts on that server and use stuff like horde to read their emails on that server. The server have a limited space and these users are relapse and never empty their trashes or remove unnecessary stuff from their accounts and the server are always getting full of crap.
Running the server periodically I see that mailboxes like
.spam and
.junk under
/mail/myserver.com/theirAccounts are never emptied. I have no terminal access to that server, just FTP. My idea was to put directories like these with
chmod 000, so their web mailers or even the system will unable to store stuff on their trash or on spam folders, discarding them automatically.
Can I do that without risking crashing the system? What more can I do to prevent stuff from accumulating on those directories. Again I remember that I do not have
ssh to that server, so I cannot install
cron or anything to empty these directories periodically.


text: Okay let me chill a bit with the Pokemon characters for a while and let me show you how to draw another character from the Sonic series. I know I already showed you how to draw Sonic and Shadow the Hedgehog, as well as Knuckles, and Neo Metal Sonic. In this next tutorial I will be showing you "how to draw Tails, step by step". Now Miles is a very popular character from the Sonic gaming series. In the game he is referred to as Tails because he is a fox with two tails. He is also yellow in color and in the Sonic the Hedgehog series he is believed to be an eight year old character. Tails made his first debut in 1992 when Sonic 2 was released. And since then he has gained popularity and fame. In the game he assists Sonic as a sidekick and he is also a pretty good mechanic too. One of Tails trademark moves is his ability to use his tail like a propeller enabling him to travel through the sky for a limited time. Because Tails became such a popular character he debuted in three of his own games with the first being "Tails and the Music Maker", then "Tails Adventure" and "Tails' Skypatrol". Tails also appears in the Sonic animated television series "Sonic X as well. Tails is a lovable incredibly cute character that has a deceiving appearance for his skills as a nine year old yellow fox. This lesson will show you how to draw Tails from Sonic the Hedgehog step by step. I hope you have fun with this tutorial as I did making it. I shall return in a bit with more to do so stay tuned kiddies I shall return. Peace out!


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Wilby too powerful for Raiders
TORRINGTON — Taifa Wright had one of those game-winning smiles dominating his face, but even the big grin had to take a back seat to his game-winning hands.
Wilby's lightning-bug senior wide receiver put a damper on Torrington's home opener by hauling in five passes for 171 yards and three touchdowns, including a highlight-reel catch in the back of the end zone despite a pass interference call, as the Wildcats raised their record to 2-0 with a 34-19 win at the Robert H. Frost Complex on Friday night.
"I put it on myself to step up and have a big game," said Wright.
Mission accomplished. Wright was on the receiving end of a couple of long passes from scrambling quarterback Darrien Bell, both similar in nature. Bell was forced out of the pocket while Wright was losing his defenders. The first toss resulted in a 62-yard score and the second strike ended up for a 67-yard TD toss.
But it was the third catch that stuck with you. Wright was interfered with in the back of the end zone, yet somehow was able to shake off the contact and come
See WILBY, Page 6B
down with the ball.
"I waited for the defender's hands to go up, and when the ball came down I caught it," explained Wright.
Wilby also rode the broad shoulders of co-captain David Hills, who picked up the running slack when Jacob Thomas came out after the first quarter with a sore shoulder after piling up 72 yards on just eight carries.
Hills (17 carries, 80 yards) toted the ball 14 times in the second half for 63 yards and a 13-yard TD run while being the major force in allowing the Wildcats to run five minutes off of the clock in the final quarter.
"I knew as the captain that I had to be the leader and get the job done," said Hills.
Another mission accomplished.
Wilby jumped on top on its first possession, going 71 yards in five plays, highlighted by a pair of runs totaling 34 yards by Thomas and capped by Hills' 15-yard run. It was 12-0 on the first of the Bell-to-Wright connections before the Raiders got on the board.
Quarterback Connor Finn fired a pass to Tyler Marens on the left side and the elusive running back bolted 23 yards for the score.
After another Bell-to-Wright TD connection, Wilby took a 20-6 lead into the lockerroom.
Torrington closed to 20-13 on a Marens' 2-yard run in the third period, but the Raiders committed too many mistakes to come all the way back. Torrington fumbled on three straight possessions hindering its hopes.
Wright's highlight catch made it 28-13 before Torrington answered with a nifty play when Finn tossed a ball out to Anthony Pandolfo who in turn connected with Desmond Langs for a 69-yard TD pass, cutting the lead to 28-18.
Hills then took over, and Torrington could not stop the Wildcats and get one more chance.
Despite the mistakes and the loss, it was a step forward for the Raiders, who were at Ansonia's mercy in the opening 52-7 loss.
"We improved," said coach Gaitan Rodriguez. "I challenged them to have a better week of practice and they did. Still, we have to clean things up. We made too many mistakes and Wilby is a good team. Right now we are going through growing pains with only two returning starters. We are getting better, off and on the field."
Marens (20-89) continued to run well for the Raiders.
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6 Terrifying Children's Cartoons from Around the World
If there's one thing we know about kids' movies, it's that some of them can get pretty terrifying. And if there's one thing we know about foreign movies, it's that all of them are confusing and bizarre. Now combine those two things, and you get the following traumatizing scenes from cartoons around the world:
#6. The Animals of Farthing Wood (Britain/France) -- Little Baby Cartoon Animals, Horribly Stabbed to Death
The Animals of Farthing Wood is an early '90s cartoon about a bunch of talking woodland critters who, after their forest is destroyed, make a friendship pact and set out on a grand adventure to find a new home. It took the combined efforts of Britain and France to turn such a harmless-sounding concept into what's possibly the most depressing animated series ever made outside of Japan.
For example, in one episode, the group gains new characters when two members of the party, the field mice, have little mice babies:
"They're all so adorable. I'm not sure which one to consume."
Surely adding kids to the cast will make the show more whimsical and fun, right? Um, no ... because exactly one episode later, this happens:
They couldn't have known they were trespassing on Vlad the Bluejay's territory.
Holy shit -- there's more gore in that scene than in the entire second season of The Walking Dead. Yes, those are the newly born baby mice impaled on a thicket of thorns.
They weren't just killed off subtly off screen: We needed to witness their horrible deaths, for some reason, and then watch their mother crying in sadness and guilt. Why introduce a litter of babies only to have them snatched away an episode later?
"Chill out, lady. They were basically strangers."
And this wasn't a one-time thing -- in another episode, the group is found out while hiding on a farm, and one of them, Mrs. Pheasant, is shot and killed by a human. Oh, but that's not the unusually cruel part yet: After the group has managed to escape, they notice that one of the animals was left behind, and the recently widowed Mr. Pheasant volunteers to go back and get them. If you already know where this is going, you are one sick individual.
"Mummy, I'm a vegetarian now." "Oh, get over yourself, honey."
Yes, he finds his dead wife plucked and cooked and about to be eaten by humans. Mr. Pheasant is so distraught that he is literally blinded by the tears and doesn't see the farmer coming. Long story short, they had a really big dinner that night.
If you look at things from the farmer's perspective, it was an incredibly happy ending.
There are actually three full seasons of this shit, with a running total of 23 on-screen deaths, many of them regular characters.
#5. Wakfu (France) -- The Heroes Become Accidental Cannibals
Wakfu is a French cartoon based on a popular (in France) MMO video game of the same name. It follows a group of heroes who wander across the land having adventures, fighting the forces of evil and occasionally murdering innocent people and eating their remains. By "occasionally," we mean "in one disturbing episode," but that's enough to land them on this list.
The episode starts innocently enough. The heroes are walking through a forest, looking for food, when they come across a little piglet ...
... which they proceed to murder the shit out of and devour. That's actually not the disturbing part.
There it is on the spit.
Granted, the fact that the animators went out of their way to make the pig look as cute as possible before slaughtering it may be disturbing enough for some kids, but it's not what we're here to talk about. It's about to get much, much worse.
After picking the piglet's bones dry and doing some other things we don't completely understand because a) we've never played the game this is based on and b) it's all in French, the heroes end up making their way into a nearby dungeon. At this point, three of the characters wander into a poorly ventilated chamber filled with green fart-air ... and when they emerge, they look like this:
In France, this is probably a metaphor for sexting or something.
It turns out that the dungeon is inhabited by a giant pig monster who somehow turns people into little piglets with wings. Oh, yes, you see where this is going.
The characters get turned back to normal at the end of the episode, of course, but that leaves a question: What about the piglet they just killed and ate? You know, the one they found near the pig-transforming dungeon, who looked exactly like they did when they were turned into pigs?
This one.
Everything seems to indicate that the pig was another adventurer who just happened to be caught in the same trap, came out as a pig and was looking for help. That's why it was smiling when they found it. And just in case you think we are jumping to some conclusion here that isn't in the show, they actually explain the whole thing again during a little credits sequence. First we see a lone swordsman wandering around, minding his own business.
"Once I sell this magic sword, I'll have enough gold to keep the orphanage afloat!"
As he wanders off screen, he is treated to the same gaseous stink as before ...
... and emerges as the little piglet from the beginning of the episode. Scared and confused, he sees something coming toward him ...
Something with inexplicable vampiric teeth.
... which turns out to be our heroes, locked on to his sweet bacon aroma. They chase the poor little bastard back off screen and off to his horrible, terrible demise.
Level up! You get +4 cannibalism!
This is either a re-creation of what happened earlier in the episode or an extra scene showing what happens once the heroes get a taste for human flesh.
#4. The Moomins (Finland) -- The Moomins Are Visited by Death Incarnate
The only things kids under 5 demand out of their TV screens are pretty colors, catchy tunes and characters with annoyingly high-pitched voices. It's that simple. On all those counts, The Moomins pretty much delivers. The classic Finnish stop-motion show stars a race of wide-eyed mouthless semi-anthropomorphic hippos called Moomins.
A consequence of Finland's rampant genetic experimentation.
The colorful storybook valley the Moomins inhabit is populated by all sorts of friendly animals and cheerful children. Everything is happy and pleasant -- but then out of nowhere comes the Groke, and everything goes to shit.
This is what the Teletubbies needed.
The Groke is an almost indescribably terrifying creature that occasionally invades the show for no apparent reason. You never actually see the Groke move: It slips between the seconds, its gaze fixed on your soul, as it emits a low, horrid breathing sound, like a recording of death itself. The worst part? It kills everything it touches. In one episode, we see a butterfly approaching it ...
You know, Finland's famous cyclops butterfly.
... and instantly dropping dead just for breathing the same air.
Technically, the Groke prevented a hurricane in France. But fuck France.
The same happens to the plants and trees surrounding it. The butterfly comes back to life when the Groke leaves at the end of the episode, but we seriously doubt there was a single kid left watching by that point.
Every other character in the show is terrified of the Groke to the point of hysteria. Another episode shows the Moomins panicking and barricading themselves into their house because they know the Groke is coming that night. Desperate, Moominpappa runs to the attic and grabs a shotgun.
"The gun won't hurt it," said Snufkin. "I know," said Moominpappa, "it's for us."
The next morning, when they head out to investigate the spot in the garden where the Groke was, they find it dead and frozen, as if the warmth of a loving God just blew away like leaves in the wind. Then the narrator says, "Oh, what could they do? The terrible Groke would surely return" -- and then the credits roll. That's how the episode ends, with the lingering thought that it's still out there.
"I don't know who you should pray to, for our God shuns you for being so funny-looking."
It's never explained what the Groke is or where it comes from. It seems specifically designed to teach kids about the randomness and inevitability of death (which is apparently more important in Finland than learning the ABC's and shit like that).


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Greg Walters Wins Race #5 With NELMS At SSP
By Ben Deatherage
(Photo Courtesy of Ken O'Neil)
The Northwest Extreme Late Model Series would be on tap for their eighth race of 2014 on Saturday July 19th at Sunset Speedway Park. It would mark the fifth occasion this season that the tour has visited the "Banks Bullring".
Taking over the lead on lap ten was Greg Walters from Banks in his T&G Trucking/American Landscaping/Schram Brothers Excavating/Duncan Automotive #97 Victory Circle. Walters would show the rest of the way in the main event to score his fifth win at SSP in '14 and his ninth straight trip to victory lane, a streak that going back as far as July 4th, 2013, when the series has been in town.
The Reser's Fine Foods/Wayne Martin Floor Covering/Alliance Automotive/Competitive Edge Sign & Design #99 MasterSbilt of Brad Martin from Warren was second while in third would be Vancouver, Washington's Jerry Schram in his Schram Brothers Excavating/Century III Stables/Bodies By Steve-O #16 MasterSbilt entry in third. The rest of the top five would be Bob Trout of Banks in the Mechanical Systems Inc./Greenway Construction #28 Victory Circle in fourth while placing fifth was the All-In Property Investments/Warpaint Motorsports Graphix #67 MasterSbilt of Gresham's Dave Walters.
It would be a clean sweep for Greg Walters as he set fast time and won both his heat race as well as the trophy dash. The winner of the only other heat race was Jerry Schram. The Northwest Extreme Late Model Series will be back in action at Willamette Speedway on Friday July 25th and Saturday 26th for a doubleheader at the historic 1/3-mile clay oval. For more information log on to latemodel.nwextremeseries.com.
Race Summary:
Northwest Extreme Late Model Series Race #8
Saturday July 19th, 2014
Sunset Speedway Park
Banks, Oregon
A Feature: 1. 97-Greg Walters; 2. 99-Brad Martin; 3. 16-Jerry Schram; 4. 28-Bob Trout; 5. 67-Dave Walters; 6. 9-Jacob Myers; 7. 88-John Gamell; 8. 8-Rob Ireland; 9. 8X-Daniel Modaff; 10. 18-Kristi Somers; 11. 76-Jason Johnson; DNS 79-Phil Johnson
Dash: 1. 97-Greg Walters; 2. 99-Brad Martin; 3. 16-Jerry Schram; 4. 28-Bob Trout
Heat 1: 1. 97-Greg Walters; 2. 99-Brad Martin; 3. 67-Dave Walters; 4. 9-Jacob Myers; 5. 79-Phil Johnson; 6. 18-Kristi Somers
Heat 2: 1. 16-Jerry Schram; 2. 76-Jason Johnson; 3. 28-Bob Trout; 4. 88-John Gamell; 5. 8X-Daniel Modaff
Qualifying: 1. 97-Greg Walters; 2. 16-Jerry Schram; 3. 99-Brad Martin; 4. 28-Bob Trout; 5. 67-Dave Walters; 6. 76-Jason Johnson; 7. 18-Kristi Somers; 8. 88-John Gamell; 9. 9-Jacob Myers; 10. 8X-Daniel Modaff; 11. 79-Phil Johnson
Sunset Speedway
Driven by MyRacePassTM
Sunset Speedway | All rights reserved


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Visit Gary Rome Hyundai
1000 Main St., Holyoke, Ma 01040
GR Commercials and Videos
Watch the latest TV commercials with Gary, Jack and the Gary Rome Hyundai Family!
Western MA Hyundai Dealer Serving Springfield and Northampton
Come to see us today; we invite all Western Massachusetts Hyundai fans to take a look at one of our new Hyundai models. We believe that a new Hyundai fits into the life of any automotive customer. From the outdoors enthusiast looking to hike trails at Mount Tom, to the sports fan ready to watch a Blue Sox game at Mackenzie Stadium, we have what you need! Maybe you are a Springfield, MA Hyundai driver looking for a safe vehicle to get you to the grocery store or the Holyoke Mall. Take some time and explore each vehicle to see which Hyundai would be perfect for you in Springfield or Northampton!
Your Western Massachusetts Used Car Dealer with Used Hyundai Vehicles
Come to Gary Rome Hyundai if you love great deals on quality used and certified pre-owned cars, trucks and SUVs. As the preferred used car dealer in Holyoke, we serve customers looking for used and certified pre-owned vehicles in Northampton as well as all over Western Massachusetts. Whatever your needs might be, whether it's an efficient used car to drive around Northampton or a reliable used SUV to drive in Springfield, you'll find a great deal at our Holyoke used car dealership. If we don't have what you want, tell us what you're looking for and we'll find it for you. Visit Gary Rome Hyundai today!
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Whether you plan to buy a new Hyundai for driving around Western Massachusetts or a reliable used car for Springfield, Gary Rome Hyundai has the finance department that can help you with the financial details. If you prefer an auto lease in Holyoke, we can help you figure out what your best option is. You can so check your financial pre-qualification for an auto loan and calculate your payments right on the Gary Rome Hyundai website. Visit us today!
If you don't know where to find us, please view our business hours and directions to get specific driving instructions to our dealership near Springfield, MA in Western Massachusetts.
Gary Rome Hyundai Vehicles: Accent |Azera | Elantra | Genesis | Genesis Coupe | Santa Fe | Sonata | Tucson | Veloster
Gary Rome Hyundai: 1000 Main Street | Holyoke, MA 01040


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Celebrate man's best friend and companion with a cat and dog jigsaw puzzle! Browse adorable outdoor, home and collage scenes of everyone's favorite pets, including every season and holiday, and various shapes and sizes. Perhaps you'd like to piece together a dog looking quite pleased sharing ice cream with his boy or a peaceful cat taking a much-needed catnap over a puzzle? (Sound familiar?) Subjects here span the whimsical illustration and the adorable photograph to the educational breed chart. With such a wide variety of cat and dog jigsaw puzzles, you will definitely find the gift for both the feline and canine-inclined.
We offer quality brands such as Masterpieces, Serendipity, Springbok, Sunsout, White Mountain, Tomax, Cobble Hill, Eurographics, Melissa and Doug and more.


text: WIL2-S (ATCC® CRL-8885™) Organism: Homo sapiens, human / Cell Type:: B lymphoblast / Tissue: spleen / Disease: hereditary spherocytosis General Information Characteristics Culture Method Specifications History Documentation Print Email Share Share this product Facebook Twitter Google+ Permits and Restrictions View Permits Organism Homo sapiens, human Tissue spleen Cell Type B lymphoblast Product Format frozen Morphology lymphoblast Culture Properties suspension Biosafety Level 2 [Cells contain Epstein-Barr virus] Biosafety classification is based on U.S. Public Health Service Guidelines, it is the responsibility of the customer to ensure that their facilities comply with biosafety regulations for their own country. Disease hereditary spherocytosis Age 5 years Gender male Ethnicity Caucasian Applications This cell line is a suitable transfection host. Storage Conditions liquid niotrogen vapor phase Clinical Data 5 yearsCaucasianmale Comments This is a HAT sensitive variant of the WIL2 human B cell line (see also ATCC CRL-8155). Complete Growth Medium The base medium for this cell line is ATCC-formulated RPMI-1640 Medium, Catalog No. 30-2001. To make the complete growth medium, add the following components to the base medium: fetal bovine serum to a final concentration of 10%. Subculturing Cultures can be maintained by addition or replacement of fresh medium. Start cultures at 2 X 105 cells/mL and maintain between 1 X 10 exp5 and 1 X 10 exp6 cells/mL. Medium Renewal: Every 2 to 3 days STR Profile Amelogenin: X,YCSF1PO: 11,12D13S317: 11D16S539: 11,12D5S818: 12,13D7S820: 9,11F13A01: 6,7F13B: 10FESFPS: 11,12LPL: 9,10THO1: 8,9.3TPOX: 8,11vWA: 17,20 Name of Depositor Lovelace Medical Foundation U.S. Patent Number 4,806,476 Disclosure This material is cited in a US or other Patent and may not be used to infringe the claims. Depending on the wishes of the Depositor, ATCC may be required to inform the Patent Depositor of the party to which the material was furnished. Permits These permits may be required for shipping this product: Customers located in the state of Hawaii will need to contact the Hawaii Department of Agriculture to determine if an Import Permit is required. A copy of the permit or documentation that a permit is not required must be sent to ATCC in advance of shipment. Basic Documentation Product Sheet Certificate of Analysis SDS


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Batman Arkham Action Pack [Download] for $9.99 + free shipping
Very good deal from Amazon. Requires Steam.
The Batman Arkham Action Pack Bundle includes the following games:
Batman Arkham Asylum GOTY
Batman Arkham City
7 Comments add a comment
Picked up this deal today! Game activates through Steam.
Got the bundle for $7.49 with promo code OCTOFUN1.
(Please note that the code can only be used once per amazon account!)
I don't play a lot of games, but I love these.
@craigthom: I don't play a lot of games, but when I do, I'm Batman.
It's a great deal. It's just too bad that Arkham City isn't the GOTY version. There's $32 of DLC for this game, so even on a 75% off sale it would be $8. Meanwhile, the GOTY edition is only $30 on Steam, so on a 75% off sale it would be $7.50. I hate it when I find that it's cheaper to buy the GOTY edition than to buy the DLC for the game I already own. It makes me feel like I should have just set my money on fire instead of making the first purchase...I'd still be out the same amount of money, but at least I'd now be known as that crazy money-burning guy on YouTube.
Granted that Arkham Asylum GOTY is also in this bundle, but I already own that one.
@innercliff: Thanks much. How do you activate through steam?
@jesterfx: Buy the game via Amazon and get the game key, download Steam and make an account, when you pull the Steam program up on your computer there should be a "+ Add Game" button on the bottom, click that and chose the "Activate A Product on Steam"... just follow the prompts and enter the Key.
@innercliff: Thanks much! Didn't realize I could get the key and put it into steam. Just saw the download links. Awesome!


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How do I form a sentence pattern for:
The more/less X happens, the more/less Y happens
E.g. The more you stir, the faster the salt dissolves.
The colder the weather, the more time it takes for snow to melt.
How do I form a sentence pattern for:
There are also several other grammar patterns that express "as one thing changes (grows/increases/decreases/etc.) another thing changes with it" (the key is that both things are changing).
These used to be JLPT 2級 patterns, but since they changed it to the new N1-N5 system, I don't know which level they are anymore.
Anyone who took formal courses on Japanese would have learned this pattern: X-eba X hodo Y.


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I've got an Olympus OM-D E-M5 (micro 4/3rds) camera with a few normal lenses (no fisheyes). Right now, I mostly just want to take multi-row images to increase the resolution (and to compensate for the "crop factor" of the camera), but I'm fascinated by full VR panoramas, so may want to do that eventually. I shoot mostly landscape & architecture type of things. Long exposure and HDR are interests. I believe that a common image will be a 3x3 (or slightly larger) mosaic using a 50-80mm (full frame equivalent) lens. A solution that would make it easy to stitch common cases (like 3x3 mosaic) would be very nice.
The standard advice when shopping for a tripod is to buy what you think you'll end up needing, because if you start out with a cheap tripod, you'll get unhappy with it very quickly, and you'll end up spending more in the long run. So, I'm hoping to determine the solution that will work for me in the long run rather than just going with a solution that I'll outgrow right away.
Given that my camera is small & light compared to APS-C or full-frame cameras, I could potentially get by with solutions like NN 3 or RS 1, but I'm not sure if I'd be limited by the rotation control on the upper arm. So, maybe the NN 4, RS 2, or Ultimate M line is appropriate, but it's really hard to tell.
To further complicate things, I use the Peak Design "Capture" camera clip system which functions as an arca-swiss plate, but because the OM-D's tripod socket is offset from the lens axis, I'm going to have to do something to adjust that. Taking off the "Capture" camera clip isn't an option -- I use that constantly, and only take panoramas occasionally. So, I think using the "t-bar" wouldn't be possible for my situation.
Here are some options I've come up with from looking at the Nodal Ninja site:
- Use NN 4 (or 3), and buy some arca-swiss clamp that will screw onto the upper arm of the NN and allow me to slide the camera a bit side-to-side to align the lens axis. I'm not sure how easy it would be to attach a clamp that will both move easily (when changing the NPP) but still hold my camera appropriately
- Use RS 2 (or 1), and buy some camera rail and clamps that will fit in the RS clamp and let me attach the camera appropriately. I don't have any fisheye lenses now, but if I got one in the future, then I could get the lens clamp and use it. Unfortunately, the lenses I have now don't have clamps available (I think).
- Use Ultimate M and either replace the upper arm clamp with something else or figure out some other clamping to align the lens axis
Cost is definitely an issue, but like I said, I don't want to try to save money now and end up being really disappointed.
I'd appreciate any words of wisdom (including "give up, you've over-constrained the problem"). I'm also interested in hearing what other micro 4/3rds people are doing as well.


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Reviewed By: A customer from Campbell River B.C. Canada on 1/4/10
I bought these half way on a tour across Canada in 2006. They worked so well I sent my SPD peddles and shoes home. They are lighter than clipless and work almost as well. They don't work on all flat pedles because of the mounting system, you may want to buy them and have them fitted at a bike shop rather than mail order.


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I know King James as well as other translators and even some commentators did not translate or recognize the passive tenses or aspects correctly. I've read about the Hophal, Niphal, and Pu'al stems and the Qal with Passive voice. As I understand the relationship of the verb becomes even weaker when the verb is imperfect and passive. I'm having trouble finding any verses which relate to God permitting (not causing) things in the passive tense or aspect. Gen 4:11 is the closest I've found. Is there any way to search the Bible for passive tenses or a list of such? Thank you
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migrated from christianity.stackexchange.com Mar 18 '13 at 10:36
This question came from our site for committed Christians, experts in Christianity and those interested in learning more.
The way you would search for passive verb forms would be to purchase a software like Logos, Accordance (For Mac), or Bibleworks. They allow you do to in depth searches for various grammatical forms.
Also, just a point of precision, Passive is a voice, not a tense.
Hmmm... This question is terribly flawed, but it is a common mistake. I don't want to get into a Hebrew lecture here, but here's some basic info to get you started. "Biblical Hebrew has no tenses in the strict sense; it uses a variety of other means to express time relations" (Waltke-OConnor 347). Of course, you're talking more about voice.
Unfortunately, this is a "grammatical" passive. It means the subject receives the action. If God were the subject of a passive verb, he would be receiving the action rather than doing it. You're looking for something to the effect: "God permits evil." The verb "permits" is active because the subject is doing the action. In this case, the action is simply doing nothing.
If you want to find a list of places where God permits evil in the OT, you need to turn to either a biblical or systematic theology. This is a theological research problem not a grammatical problem. Look under hamartiology or theology proper.
Your example of Gen 4:11 isn't a workable example. Sure, it says Cain killed his brother, but it doesn't say explicitly that God permitted it. You may want to take a look at the first chapter of Job. The cycles of obedience-sin-judgment-repentance in Judges could also be helpful as it sets a pattern of God bringing punishment through allowing the Israel to have its own way.


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Bike ride up (and down) a volcano
A bicycle. One of the most beautiful spots on earth. 35 miles. 10,000 feet of climbing. Feelings of pain and exhaustion waiting to happen. If this is your idea of a great vacation then keep on reading.
Ever since picking up road biking a few months ago, I fantasized about doing a multi-day bike tour in the not so distant future. Adventure Cycling and REI (among others) offer a variety of tours with different difficulty levels, lengths and, of course, locations. In order to get in the mood (and training state) for such a trip, I felt it would be good to get a few longer and intense rides under my belt. The combination of great air fares and the fact that I found out that one can actually ride up Haleakalā on Maui, led me into booking a trip to the second-largest of the Hawaiian Islands for mid November. And so I found myself on a beach in Pāʻia in the early morning hours of November 15, in full cycling gear and my Specialized rental bike leaned against a tree nearby—it was time to rock n' roll.
The following is a description of my own experiences while riding up the volcano, however if you are looking for an even more detailed trip report, I encourage you to visit Mike Jacoubowsky's definitive guide for riding up Haleakalā.
Starting Out
The adventure started with tipping my toe into the water of the Pacific Ocean, a nice symbolic ritual and it underlines that this ride starts at 0 elevation. After a few pedal strokes, I left the small town of Pāʻia, the official start of the ride. For quite a while, the sides of the road are lined by farmland on one side and little housing and small businesses on the other. But with every minute, the area gets less and less populated. Due to the amount of rainfall this part of the island gets, there is green all around.
After riding for about 6.5 miles and climbing roughly 1,500 feet, I reached the town of Makawao, more than double the size of Pāʻia, with quite some shops and lunch places along Baldwin Ave. After the intersection with Makawao Road, Baldwin Avenue becomes Olinda Road which greeted me right away with a steep 13% climb of around 300 feet in length (which is probably the steepest section of the whole climb, so be relieved to get that out of the way at the beginning).
At the 8 mile marker, I made a right turn onto Hanamu Road, avoiding to continue riding on I-390 and eventually reaching a dead end. So not missing that turn is quite imperative. From Hanamu Road I connected to I-377 (or Haleakala Hwy) via the short Kealaloa Ave. For the next 4 miles, I admired the lush of green to both sides of the road and great views of West Maui, while I was climbing and climbing and climbing…. Conquering that stretch, the area showed signs of civilization again when I reached settlements that are part of the Kula region. The sign for Haleakala National Park, which I have been waiting for finally manifested at mile marker 14 and about 3,400 feet of elevation, directing me onto Crater Road and further up the mountain.
Crater Road
The next 7 miles were what seemed like a never-ending string of switchbacks, first meandering around nice residential areas but only after 2 miles presented me with wide open space. During that 7 mile section, you are climbing up about 2,300 feet and reaching 5,700 feet after a total of around 21 miles. I reached that point after roughly 3 hours (to put that in perspective, the fastest rider in the 2011 Cycle to the Sun bike race was already enjoying the views from up top for 11 minutes at that time).
A pretty much straight climb to 6,500 feet over about 3.3 miles brought me to a right bend with lots of forest and vegetation before reaching another milestone: The Haleakala National Park entrance (where I paid my $5 entrance fee) at 6,700 feet and a total of just over 24 miles. 11 miles and 3,300 feet of climbing to go. You have either the option to fill up your water bottles at the entrance (water hose at the back of the building) or at the Haleakala National Park Headquarters Visitor Center (restrooms with water fountains on the left side of the building), which is about 1 mile up the road from the park entrance.
Above the Clouds
From here on out, there were 8 more turns (stretched switchbacks) between me and the final stretch to the top. The vegetation grew more and more sparse with every feet of elevation and the views more and more gorgeous (above the line of clouds at this point) as I climbed further towards the summit. 7.7 miles of gruel climbing up to 9,200 feet, with rest stops about every 500 feet finally brought me to that last stretch where you feel real close to the top (the operative word is "feel").
At 9,800 feet your mind might trick you into thinking you are already there (with the parking lot of the Haleakala National Park Visitor Center to the left), but no, there is still a significant stretch to go. Actually it is only about 0.7 miles and a bit over 200 feet of climbing, but having been on the bike for 6 hours and 15 minutes, this felt like a real real hard challenge. Eventually, after a total of 6 hours and 24 minutes, I reached the summit at 10,023 feet, 35 miles away from the beach in Pāʻia where I had started this epic ride.
For about an hour I took in the scenery and surfed the waves of emotions of my accomplishment, it was then time for the equally thrilling downhill ride (for which the regular tourist type has to pay for). Luckily it was not terribly cold at the summit (mid 60s), but nevertheless I put on my arm and leg warmers as well as my wind breaker and long finger gloves and cruised down. The downhill took me about 90 minutes.
Thoughts on the ride
The ride was one of the most strenuous things I have ever attempted and is pretty comparable to hiking up Mount Whitney. Especially after 6,000 feet, the elevation starts to get to you and combined with the fact that you started out from 0 and had covered 20 miles of constant climbing already really affects your performance. At the beginning I had teamed up with another fellow rider, John from Vancouver, B.C., whom I had met in the public parking lot in Pāʻia. Having done a couple of triathlons and Ironmans, I was not really a match for his speed, so we split up after about 1 hour of riding to keep going at my own pace, which was definitely important.
The traffic was surprisingly heavy at the beginning of the ride in the Pāʻia and Makawao area, died down a bit and picked up again fueled by tourists driving up the volcano. In general I found it to be fine, unfortunately with the occasional driver coming a little too close, but luckily it worked out without incident.
As Mike points out in his guide, it is pretty important to pick a nice day for the ride. I had kept a close eye on the forecast when heading to Maui and the day right after I got there turned out to be the best one with sunshine and clear skies pretty much all the way. You certainly want to try to avoid a day with rain or fog.
In terms of food and drinks, I brought multiple energy bars and gels with me, as well as Gatorade powder sticks, which make it real easy to turn regular water into an electrolyte-rich sports drink. There are certainly ways to stock up on food along the way (in Pāʻia or Makawao, as well as the Sunrise Country Market on Crater Rd), but the only time I filled up my 2 25oz Camelbak Podium Big Chill bottles was at the Park Headquarters Visitor Center.
Bike Rental
Instead of bringing my own bike, I ended up renting a Specialized Secteur Comp from Island Biker Maui, which came to a total of $200 for the whole week (which would have included a bike rack, that I did not end up needing since Alamo upgraded me to a minivan). It included a pump, a island biker maui branded water bottle, 2 bottle cages, flat repair tools, a spare tube and a Specialized helmet.
I ended up going with them since I ride a Specialized at home and they turned out to be the cheapest option for a weekly rental. When I did my research, I also found these other options which may or may not suit you better (prices are per December 2011):
- Maui Cyclery (99 Hana Hwy, Paia, HI 96779): Scott Speedster S20 ($45/day, $220/week)
- West Maui Cycles (1087 Limahana Pl, #6, Lahaina, HI 96761): Specialized Performance Road Bike (1 day: $60, 3-6 days: $50/day, $220/week), Auto Bicycle Carrier (1 day: $5, 3-6 days: $3/Day, $15/week)
- Maui Road Bike Rentals by Boss Frog's (locations in Kihei and Lahaina): Fuji Aero 3.0 SST ($50/day, $200/week), bike rack ($15/week)
- Ride data on Garmin Connect
- Ride photos on Flickr
- Mike Jacoubowsky's definitive guide for riding up Haleakalā
- Jeremy vs the Volcano
- Another great ride while on Maui: West Maui Loop