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< Asspen
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"Jared Has Aides/Script" | "Asspen/Script" | "Freak Strike/Script" |
- Stan Marsh
- Kyle Broflovski
- Eric Cartman
- Butters Stotch
- Sharon Marsh
- Randy Marsh
- Sheila Broflovski
- Gerald Broflovski
- Ike Broflovski
- Linda Stotch
- Stephen Stotch
- Phil
- Josh
- Thumper
- Tad Mikowski and Two Friends
- Heather
- A Teenage Girl
- Resort Announcer
- Mechanic
- Voguing Skiers
- Police Officers
- Creatures for Breasts
- Singers
[Butters' house, night, kitchen. Linda is serving drinks. The Marshes and the Broflovskis are at table. Sheila holds Ike on her lap] | |
Sharon | Thanks for having us all over for dinner, Chris and Linda. |
Sheila: | Yes, it was fabulous! |
Linda: | Oh, we're just really happy that your boys have become such good friends with our little Butters! |
Stephen: | Yeah. We figure that if our boys are goona be great friends, we should all get to be friends, too. |
Linda: | Friends, by default. [giggles] |
Randy: | Well, our boys do seem to be spending a lot of time together lately. I think ever since their friend Kenny died they've been looking for someone to fill the void. |
Stephen: | Well, our son is a perfect void-filler. It's nice that he finally has your sons to be his best buddies! |
[Butters' house, living room. The four boys sit on the sofa looking at television, except Butters is asleep at one end] | |
Cartman: | [alerting the other two] Look you guys, Butters is asleep. |
Stan: | He's such a douchebag |
Cartman: | Hey! Have you guys ever seen this trick? [drops down] When someone's sleeping, you can take a glass of warm water, [takes a glass of water and brings it to Butters' hand] and you put their hand in it... [dunks Butters' hand in it] |
Stan: | [watches as Cartman climbs the sofa] Yeah, and then what? |
Cartman: | And then, you pee on it! [drops his pants and pees on Butters' hand] heheh-heheheheheheheh. |
Kyle: | No, dude, you're supposed to put their hand in warm water and it makes them pee. |
Cartman: | [still peeing] Oh, really? ...Oh well, heh, heheheheh, heh |
[Butters' house, kitchen. Conversation goes on] | |
Chris: | And we were thinking, since they've all become such close friends, how great it would be for us to all go together to Aspen for a ski weekend. |
Gerald: | A-Aspen? Uuuh, we, we can't really afford that. |
Chris: | No, you see, Linda and I found this ad where you can get two night free at a condo in Aspen if you attend a time-share presentation.. |
Randy: | They let you stay for free? |
Chris: | Yes! And all we have to do is attend a thirty-minute meeting! |
Sheila: | Well that sounds like a good deal. |
Randy: | Sounds good to me; let's go this weekend! |
Sheila: | Oh, boy! Skiing in Aspen! I can't wait! [an '80s tune begins to play. A shot of the boys in the living room, then the adults pour in from the kitchen] |
Stephen: | Hey boys! We're all going to Aspen for the weekend! |
Stan, Kyle, Cartman: | All right! [Butters stirs awake] |
Butters: | Wow, a ski trip with my new best buddies! [feels some tension as he stretches] Oh, I'm all sticky. [wipes his hands on the sofa and cushions] |
[The Rocky Mountains, day. Chris Stotch drives all three families and Cartman off to Aspen] | |
Stephen: | Here we are, everyone. [Before them lies a valley with many buildings in it. Next to the station wagon is a sign reading "WELCOME TO ASPEN"] |
[They proceed into town, a tourist mecca, passing all sorts of high-priced tony stores. The scene freezes, and the new title comes up: "South Park in Aspen", then the scene continues. The adults are in happy awe as a woman walks by with her two poodles in front of a jewelry store. The next shot is of the four boys looking out marveling at the sights. They pass a man snorting cocaine in plain view in front of Bernie's. Next shot is of a resort in which a skier finishes his ski run. The entrance is shown: "Aspen Heaven: A Time-Share Community." The station wagon stops in front of a condominium complex and everyone gets out, making their way to the entrance. Fade out.] | |
[Fade in, next morning. The adults sit around a coffee table while the kids sit at the dining table eating breakfast behnd them. The adults are getting dressed for the day] | |
Sheila: | Oh, this is gonna be so much fun; I haven't skied in years! |
Chris: | Where are Butters and Eric? |
Stan: | They're still asleep. |
Chris: | Butters? Eric? Come on! We gotta get to the powder! [a knock on the door, and Linda rises to answer it. Two men enter] |
Phil: | [brunet] Hello, folks, I'm Phil and this is Josh [a blond]. We're with the Aspen Time-Share Company. [the other parents gather 'round] |
The Parents: | Hello. |
Josh: | You folks enjoying the condo? |
Sheila: | It's lovely. Thank you. |
[The dining table] | |
Cartman: | You guys, you guys! You're not gonna believe this, this is so funny! |
Kyle: | What |
Cartman: | So last night, while Butters was asleep, I gave him a Hitler. |
Stan: | What's a Hitler? |
Cartman: | You know, when somebody is sleeping and you put your finger up your butt and then, wipe it on their upper lip to give them a little Hitler mustache? You've never Hitlered anyone? |
Stan: | No, I never have. |
Cartman: | Shh-shh, here he comes. |
Butters: | Goooood mornin', fellas! All set to go skiin'?! [Cartman starts laughing] A-huh, u-uh, uh what's so funny? |
Cartman: | [knowingly] Nothing, Butters. Right, guys?! |
[The front door] | |
Phil: | Well, we can't wait to show you what Aspen Time-Share is offering investors. Shall we do our thirty-minute meeting? |
Randy: | Oh, do we have to do it right now? |
Josh: | Well, best to do it and get it out of the way. |
Chris: | Okay. [Phil and Josh leave, Sheila steps forward, and the adults begin to exit] |
Sheila: | Boys, we have to go to this time-share presentation real quick, but you go meet your ski instructor on the bunny hill. |
The Boys: | Okay. |
Chris: | We'll meet you boys on the slopes. [exits and closes the door] |
Butters: | Hey, do you guys smell that? |
Stan: | Smell what? |
Butters: | Ehh, it kind of smells stinky in this condo. [Cartman chuckles] |
Cartman: | I don't smell anything. Do you guys? [bursts out laughing. Stan and Kyle just look at him as Butters looks up, wondering...] |
[Music fades in. Exterior shots of the resort are shown .The bunny slope is shown. Lifts go up and down as kids practice skiing moves. The four boys and Ike are shown waiting for their instructor.] | |
Butters: | Do you guys smell that? It smells bad out here, too. I'm starting to think this whole town smells like doodoo. |
Cartman: | Yeah, well, that why they call is Asspen. [laughs at his cleverness. A skier skis up to them] |
Thumper: | All right, little dudes, [sets his skis aside] great to see you out here. My name is Thumper, and I'm gonna be your cool ski instructor. [gives the boys two thumbs up] |
Cartman: | [to Stan] His name is Thumper? |
Thumper: | We're gonna take it slow, take it easy, make sure everybody has a goood time. 'Cause what is skiing about? Having a good...? [puts his left hand to his ear, hoping for an answer. The boys just look at him] Time, that's right. Now, just a few safety things to keep in mind: First of all, look straight ahead when you ski. You look down, you're gonna fall, you're gonna have a bad time. Also, be aware of skiers around you. You run into another skier, your skis are gonna cross, gonna have a bad time. |
Butters: | So where's the part where we have a good time? |
Thumper: | Hey, little dude, you got some crap right here. [motions to the nose, where Butters does indeed have crap] |
Butters: | Wuh, that's my face, sir. |
Thumper: | Alright, we're gonna do this without any poles until we know our two primary feet positions. To go slow, we wedge our skis together [he puts his indices and thumbs together; front ski tips touch], in the shape of a slice of pizza. Then to go faster, we put 'em parallel, like... French fries. [begins to drift forward] You see that? [wedges the skis] Pizza, [lines up the skis] French fries, [wedges the skis] Pizza, [lines up the skis] French fries. [moves farther away each time] |
Butters: | Ah-hey, this is gonna be just like eatin' at Shakey's, huh fellas? |
Thumper: | Okay, let's have the little dude at the end try first! What's your name? |
Ike: | Iiiiike! |
Thumper: | Okay, Mike, ski down to me! [Ike looks down the hill, but doesn't move] |
Kyle: | Go on, Ike. |
Ike: | [begins to practice the positions] Pee-za, Fron fries. Pee-za, Fron fries. Fron friiiies. [skis out of control] Peeee-zaaa [skis for a lodge and right through its wall.] |
Thumper: | Okay, you see what he did?! He French-fried when he should've pizza'd. You French-fry when you pizza, you're gonna have a bad time! |
[The meeting, meanwhile. Phil and Josh are presenting the time-share plan] | |
Phil: | And so, we think we can convince you to buy one of our combos that's opening right here in Phase 4. |
Josh: | That sounds like a GREAT investment opportunity! |
Gerald: | I-I'm sorry, but none of us can really afford to own our own vacation condo. |
Randy: | Yeah, and to be honest, we're just doing this meeting because of the two nights free deal. |
Phil: | Oh, I know, that's what everybody says - "Not me, I can't afford it." But what if I told you you could own one of our properties for only eight thousand dollars! |
Josh: | Wow! |
Sheila: | For only eight thousand dollars we can buy a condo here? |
Phil: | Well you see, "time-share" means you buy the condo with about twenty other people like yourselves [exits screen left and immediately enters screen right] You [puts his hands together] "share" the condo with other investors and pick the [points to his watch] "time" you want to stay. |
Josh: | [makes a fist with his right hand] Share, [makes a fist with his left hand] time. [joins his fists together] Time share. |
Randy: | So then it's not really ours. |
Phil: | Sure it is, one twenty-fourth and a half yours! You see, time-share has made it possible for even working-class people like you to say, "I've got a little place in Aspen." |
Josh: | Try it. Try saying it. "I've got a little place in Aspen." |
The Parents: | I've got a little place in Aspen. |
Phil: | Rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? Say guys, how'd you like to tell that hot secretary "I've got a nice little place in Aspen?" Hahaha! Just kidding, wives. |
Randy: | [looks at his watch] Listen uh, it's been thirty minutes. We'd like to go hit the slopes now? |
Phil: | Woll uh, you still gotta come to the time-share luncheon. We did give you a free condo for the weekend. |
Gerald: | Well your ad said we only had to attend a thirty-minute meeting. |
Phil: | Right, but this isn't that meeting. The luncheon is that meeting. [the parents just look at him] Don't worry, you're gonna have a great free meal at the luncheon. |
[Bunny slope, later.] | |
Kyle: | [practicing his moves] ...French fries... pizza... french fries... [does the pizza moves and sees Cartman fallen on his back] come on, Cartman. |
Cartman: | Ugh, no more., [Kyle skis on. Stan is skiing as well, and another skier comes up to him, showering him with snow] |
Tad: | Looks like you think you're a pretty good skier, huh, kid? |
Stan: | Well I'm... catchin' on pretty fast, I guess. |
Tad: | I've been skiing for twenty-two years. Think you could beat me? |
Stan: | Uhh... no. |
Tad: | What's your name, hot shot? [two of his friends join him] |
Stan: | Stan. Marsh. |
Tad: | Stan Marsh [laughs] Stan DARSH is more like it. |
Skier: | Haaaa, Darsh! [his pole is slapped by the first skier's] |
Tad: | Alright, how about a race, then? You and me. |
Stan: | Dude, I'm just learning. |
Tad: | OooooOOOOooo! [starts moving and squawking like a chicken, ending up facing Stan] Looks to me like you're not a "hot shot" after all. |
Stan: | I never said I was. |
Tad: | Oooooooo! |
Tad's friends: | Oooooooo! |
Tad: | You may think you've got what it takes, but as long as I'm around, you'll always be number two! [the two other skiers left] See ya later, Darsh! [laughs, kicks some snow into Stan's face, and skis away] |
[The meeting at Aspen Heaven, later. Phil and Josh are still extolling the time-share plan] | |
Phil: | And THAT is why owning a piece of an Aspen condo is not only possible,... |
Josh: | It's downright smart! |
Gerald: | Aha. [waiters come in with platters of food] |
Phil: | Op, here it is! As promised, a fabulous free lunch! |
Gerald: | Wow, filet mignon' and lobster! |
Sharon: | [apreciatively] Not bad. [Sheila and the others begin to eat] |
Josh: | It's nice to feel rich, isn't it. |
Sheila: | Oh, you know, this is really great. |
Chris: | It sure it. [the waiters whisk the plates away] |
Randy, Gerald: | What? |
Randy: | Wait... |
Phil: | You see? That's the great thing about time-share. You get a little taste of luxuries you can't afford. |
Josh: | And then share it with the people that come tomorrow. |
Randy: | All right, look, we've been here for over three hours |
Gerald: | Yeah. Can we go now, please? |
Phil: | Of course you can. Go hit those slopes! [softly] If you could just please show me the backs of your table place cards real quick? [the others pick up their cards and look] Oh my God! You got the red sticker! |
Josh: | They got the red sticker?! |
Phil: | They got the red sticker! |
Stephen: | What's the red sticker? |
Josh: | Uh, well, well, that means if you come up to the condo sales office you'll receive one of three great prizes. |
Randy: | No, no-no-no-no. We, we did your meeting and we did your lunch, we're finished, okay. |
Phil: | Okay, okay, fine, I mean... [his voice gradually drops to a whisper] It would only take a second, but, I mean, you know, what did we do for you except, give you a free condo for the weekend. Huh. Seems like you could just... could just come up... and see what prize you had... [Josh begins to cry] |
Stephen: | O-all right! |
[The bunny slope, even later. Kyle and Stan are skiing down faster now, mastering the basic pizza-French fries technique] | |
Stan: | ...pizza... french fries... french fries... pizza... |
Kyle: | ...french fries...pizza...pizza...pizza-french fries...[loses control and jerks forward, then flips over and lands next to Ike, who's half-buried in the snow. Kyle looks over and gets up quickly. He dusts himself off as Stan catches up] I wonder where our parents are. |
Stan: | Who cares? I'm having more fun on my own. |
Tad: | [arrives, with his friends close behind] well well well, if it isn't Stan Darsh! |
Stan: | [winces and covers his face with his right hand] Oh no. |
Tad: | Say Darsh, you don't mind if I take Heather out for some fondue tonight, do ya? |
Stan: | Heather? [a woman skis up and stands next to the skier] |
Heather: | Sorry, Stan, it's just that when it comes to skiing, Tad has all the right moves. |
Tad: | I just might show her my moves tonight, if you know what I mean. [giggles] |
Heather: | You aren't mad, are you, Stan? I mean, a girl's gotta look out for her best interests. |
Stan: | [just looks at them] ...who are you people?! |
Tad: | Still don't wanna race me? I told you he was chicken, Heather. Stan Marsh the Darsh! [laughs disdainfully] |
Stan: | All right dude, if I race you will you leave me alone? |
Tad and friends: | Oooooooo! |
Tad: | Alright, fine. You and me at the summit, now! |
Stan: | Okay. |
Tad's friends: | Race! Race! |
[Ski run, moments later. A view from the bottom shows a long run, and the resort's main buildings off to the right near the finish line] | |
Announcer: | Ladies and Gentlemen, Aspen Mountain presents another ex-TREME racing showdown. [the gathering crowd cheers] Seven-time World Aspen champion Tad Mikowski versus eight-year-old Stan Marsh! |
Tad: | Hah! You're going down, little boy! |
Stan: | Yeah, prob'ly |
Butters: | Do you think Stan has a chance? [the countdown begins. The chutes open and Tad takes off. Stan moves along allowing, sticking to the basic moves] Uh go Stan! [Tad flies down the hill, banking and weaving throughout. Stan appears a few seconds later, going down carefully] |
Stan: | Fries... fries... |
A skier: | [Tad zooms past him] He's got it! Tad's gonna win it! [as the crowd cheers, Tad clears the last few hills and then goes through the finish line. He comes to a stop and people gather around him] |
Tad: | [raising his arms in victory] Yeah! Yeeah! Yeah! You lose, Darsh! [kisses Heather, who reacts. They lock lips. Stan finally crosses the finish line, in the wedge position] Yeah! [Butters, Kyle and Ike walk up to Stan] |
Butters: | U-u-uh, Stan, yo-you gave it your best shot, and that all Jesus asks of you. |
Stan: | [drops his poles] Dude, I'm just happy this whole stupid thing is all over with. [a group of young adults walk by carrying Tad high in the air. The group stops, the boys turn around to see] |
Tad: | [looking down at Stan] No hard feelings, right Darsh?! [starts laughing.. The group moves away. The boys turn left as their eyes follow the group] Yeah! |
Teen Girl: | Stan, [theh boys turn to see her] for what it's worth, I think you were really brave. |
Stan: | Thanks. Who are you? |
Teen Girl: | Hey, all the cool teens are gonna be at the youth center tonight for a dance. I hope you'll come because you're just so... we-hell, you're just so.. well, that's all. [turns around and walks off] |
[The valley, day. There are three long lines of people waiting to ski. The parents finally make it out of the meeting] | |
Gerald: | Finally, we get to go skiing! |
Randy: | Oh my God, look how long the lift lines are. |
Gerald: | Yeah, I guess these passes the time-share salesman gave us will come in handy. |
Lift Operator: | Can I help you? |
Stephen: | Yes, we have the special passes to use the exclusive lift from the time-share company? |
Lift Operator: | Ooooh, go right on ahead, folks. |
Sheila: | Thank you. [the parents move forward and position themsleves for the lift, which comes down presently. The parents get on and the lift goes up the slope again] |
Randy: | Well, this certainly is nice. |
Gerald: | Yeah, we may not have gotten to ski earlier, but with this lift we'll get more runs in than anybody. |
Stephen: | Have fun waiting in line, suckers! Woohoohoo! |
Linda: | Oh, Chris. [Randy giggles, then looks up] |
Chris: | Hey look, this trailer goes right into a building. [the lift turns, drops them off, and moves back out.] |
[Aspen Heaven meeting room, again.] | |
Phil: | Welcome back, folks! |
Josh: | We've got a special offer we can't wait to tell you about! |
Randy: | Oh, God-damnit! |
[Aspen Youth Center. Teens enter from all sides. The boys go in as well.] | |
Kyle: | Dude, it's been twelve hours. Where the hell are our parents?! |
[Aspen Youth Center, inside. The boys find themselves on a dance floor listening to a live band] | |
Teen Girl: | I'm glad you guys came. Do you like our youth center? |
Stan: | I' seems fine. |
Voguing Skier: | Yeah, too bad we're getting shut down. That hot-shot skier Tad's father is gonna bulldoze the building |
Voguing Skier 2: | Where are all us kids supposed to go? |
Stan: | Don't care. [the boys go further onto the dance floor] |
Kyle: | What do you wanna do now? |
Stan: | I dunno. |
Butters: | Let's dance. [begins to dance. Cartman watches with dismay. Butters does a bunch of dancve movies, including the Moonwalk and some break-dancing] |
Cartman: | Butters, I hate you with every inch of my body. [the music is stopped and a voice is heard] |
Announcer: | Alright, Aspen-heh. As a special treat tonight we're proud to have the winner of today's race, Tad Mikowski. [moves off and the crowd begins to cheer as Tad approaches the mic] |
Tad: | Yeah! |
Stan: | Oh,. God. [buries his face in his hand again.] |
Tad: | Hey everyone. [the crowd quiets down] I'd like to sing a little song, if I may. |
The Ladies: | [swooning] Ooooooooo. |
Stan: | Gah, let's go you guys. [turns around and leads the others towards the door...] |
Tad: | This is a song I wrote about... Stan Marsh. [Stan stops in his tracks] Staaaaan... Daaaaarsh... Stan. Darsh. Darshy Daaarsh Stan Daaarsh Stan Darsh, Stan-darsh Stan Daaaaarsh Daaarsh Stan Darsh... |
Stan: | Dude, what the hell is your problem?! |
Tad and friends: | OooOOOOOOoooooo! |
Stan: | I raced you, You won! |
Tad: | A rematch? Oh, Darsh. You're even dumber than I thought. |
Teen Boy: | He'll ski you anytime, anywhere |
Teens: | Yeah! |
Teen Girl: | [talking to Tad, referring to Stan] But this time, if he wins, you get your dad to not close our youth center |
Stan: | What? |
Tad: | Alright then, let's make it interesting. Tomorrow afternoon. On the K-13. [points at a window. The camera pans to the window, and a lone huge peak is shown. Tow teens look and are horrified] |
A Teen Boy: | [steps into view] The K-13? But that's the most dangerous run in all of America. [steps away] |
Tad: | Hell, I'm not chicken! Are you, Darsh?! [starts squawking like a chicken] |
Stan: | I'll be there, you queen! |
Tad: | Oh, yeah?! |
Stan: | Yeah! |
Tad: | Oh, Darsh, you're even dumber than I thought... Again! See ya tomorrow. |
[The Youth Center, outside. The boys exit the center] | |
Butters: | Uh you're not really gonna go down that K-13 run, are ya, Stan? |
Stan: | Dude, I have to! |
Kyle: | [shoves Stan a bit and faces him] Stan, you can't let that Tad guy get to you. Screw him, dude. |
Stan: | Dude, he's got Heather! |
Kyle: | You don't even know Heather! |
Stan: | I know I know I-, ugh. Look I can't explain it but I have to do this. I'm not gonna die. I mean, how bad can the K-13 be? |
Mechanic: | [appears out of nowhere] The K-13? You don't wanna go down that run. That run has got a history. Thirty-five people have died goin' down it, and some say you can still see their ghosts up there. It was on that very ski run that a group of students were killed by a wolf-boy who escaped from a mental institution. You see, that ski run was once a burial ground to a tribe of vampire Wichicaw Indians who ate the flesh of children with no eyes. Yah-, a lot of history on that ski run. [the boys just look at him] |
Stan: | ...Thank you. |
Mechanic: | Yah. [moves off] |
Kyle: | Look, Stan. When Kenny died I learned how important friends are. I'm not gonna lose another friend. |
Stan: | This isn't about you, Kyle, I have to do this, okay? I have to! |
[Aspen Heaven, next day. The parents are still meeting with Phil and Josh] | |
Phil: | ...And so you see it's the investment opportunity that keeps on giving. |
Gerald: | How many times do we have to tell you this? We don't want to buy shares in a condo! |
Josh: | And we certainly don't want to pressure you. |
Gerald: | Pressure us?! You kept us all day yesterday and then had a chair lift bring us back! |
Phil: | Heh-ey, you can leave anytime you want. Of course, that is, if you don't want the super-secret fun prize for attending the slide show. |
Randy: | [Rises from his chair angrily] No, we don't want the super-secret fun prize alright?! We just wanna ski! Come on, everybody! [leads the others towards the door] |
Josh: | I know! Have you ever considered going in on a time share? |
Phil: | That's only a couple thousand each, Josh! |
Randy: | Don't listen to 'em, let's just go! |
[Aspen Heaven, the hallway. The parents walk down the hall] | |
Gerald: | My God, can you believe those people?! |
Stephen: | I hope you don't blame me for all that. I mean, the ad ...did... just say a thirty-minute presentation. |
Randy: | Let's just get out of here. [opens a door across the hall. The parents find themselves in a room exactly like the one they left across the hall] |
Phil: | Folks, I'm glad you're back, because we forgot to mention, time-share condos are still deeded properties! |
Parents: | Aaagh!! [they turn around and walk out... er, in] |
Phil: | Oooo, you folks really lucked out this time. You're visitor number one thousand! |
Josh: | That means you can listen to our special offer for privileged members only! |
Stan: | That does it! I'm calling the police! [takes out the cell phone and begins dialing. One of the salesmen groans softly] |
[Bunny slope, day. Beginners practice their moves. A girl stands next to Thumper; he sets her up and sends her on her way] | |
Stan: | [approachs] Mr. Ski Instructor, I need a lot of training, fast. I'm gonna race down the K-13. |
Thumper: | K-13?! But you're just a beginner! You ski outta your league, you're gonna have a bad time. |
Stan: | I have to do this, okay? I have to! |
Thumper: | Alright, well, if you gotta get good at somethin' really fast, there's only one way to do it. Come on! |
[A song begins to play. Thumper is giving Stan some quick instructions and then Stan starts skiing. Thumper looks on, encouraging] | |
Singer (and backup singers): | The day is approaching to give it your best |
[Aspen Heaven meeting room, day. Two officers are present with the two salesmen and the six parents] | |
Randy: | All the ad said was that we had to attend a thirty-minute meeting, right, and- and it's been a day and a half! These guys won't let us leave! |
Phl: | That's not true, officers, we said they could leave at any time. |
Thin Cop: | All right, let me see if I got this straight. You two gentlemen are offering part-time limited liability [suddenly animated] ownership in one of your fabulous condos for the one-time price of eight thousand dollars?! |
Phil: | That's right! |
Fat Cop: | Sounds to me like if anybody should be arrested it should be you people for passin' up such a great deal! |
Thin Cop: | That's right, you're practically stealing condos at that price. "Book 'em, Danno!" [laughs. The parents look on, chagrined] |
Randy: | Oh, Jesus. |
Linda: | No! No! |
Gerald: | The police work for time-share, too? [the police draw their guns and aim at the parents] |
Phil: | [somewhat menacing, moves forward] The police, the mayor, the president of the United States. Perhaps now you see the severity of your situation. I think we shall all sit down... [backs up] and listen to the presentation. |
Josh: | [draws his own gun and aims] Sit! [the parents go to the table and sit on the chair] |
Phil: | Now, you're probably asking yourselves... "Can my time-share condo turn into a profit?" |
Josh: | "What kind of cash flow can I realize from my investment?" |
Phil: | The answer might astonish you. For over ten years investors have seen their- |
[Aspen Heaven ski run, finish line area, day] | |
Announcer: | The powder is fresh and the stage is set for Tad versus Stan on the K-13! |
[K-13 peak. Tad and Stan are ready to ski] | |
Tad: | This time you're not just gonna lose, you're gonna die! |
[Finish line area. The other boys and Ike are presnt, with their instructor behind them] | |
Kyle: | I can't lose another friend. First Kenny and now Stan? All I'm gonna have left are you two douches. [Cartman gives him an angry look] |
Announcer: | Ready. Set. Go! [the crowd cheers and Tad takes off. Stan begins to ski] |
Stan: | Pizza... pizza... pizza... |
Man In Yellow Jacket: | Tad's got the lead. |
Butters: | Come on, Stan! [Tad is shown zipping down the hill, Stan is still at the summit making his way down] |
Tad: | [stops near a tree] Haha. [pulls out a small saw hidden in the back side of his jacket] This should slow down Darsh a bit! [goes to the tree and starts sawing it off at the base. Stan has gone down the mountain some more] |
Announcer: | [the crowd cheers the skiers on] And it looks like Tad is way out in front. |
Tad: | [finishes sawing the tree in two and laughs] Now, I'll win for sure! |
Kyle: | Awgh, dude, I can't look. [closes his eyes and covers them with his hands Tad is shown zipping further down the hill, Stan has left the summit] |
Tad: | [stops and looks up the hill, then leaves. He returns with a bucket of sand and pours it out] Let's see what some sand does to your speed, Darsh! [leaves. Stan continues his run. Tad returns with more sand and pours it out] He doesn't stand a chance, now! [Stan reaches the fallen tree and climbs over it, then continues his run. Tad pours out even more sand] I'm gonna beat 'em! [tosses the bucket away and leaves] |
Announcer: | [as the crowd cheers] The race is half over and Tad is still out in the lead! [Stan is moving along nicely. Tad stops further down and pushes a large cage of hamsters onto the slope] |
Tad: | Heh, when Darsh skis by here, I'll let all these hamsters go. That should distract him just long enough for me to win the race! |
Teen girl: | [walks in] Oh, Tad. |
Tad: | ...What are you doing up here? |
Teen girl: | Oh nothing. I just thought I could distract you. With these. [lifts up her jacket and top. Tad look and is unable to move as he groans at what he sees. Stan moves along in the background and passes Tad, who remains spellbound. Stan reaches the finish line and breaks it. The boys and the crowd cheer the victory and approach Stan. Another song begins to play] |
Kyle: | Good job, dude! |
Stan: | Thanks. [Tad reaches the finish line to see the celebration start without him. He takes off his goggles and throws them to the ground in anger] |
Announcer: | You did it, Stan! [Tad approaches Heather, who gives him the cold shoulder and walks away. Tad is crestfallen] |
Teen girl: | Thanks a lot, Stan. Now we're gonna be able to keep the youth center. [the crowd cheers louder, and the mechanic stops by] |
Mechanic: | Well, that does it. Looks like the spirits of the Wakichaw Indians can finally rest in peace. [three spirits rise from K-13 thanking Stan for setting them free.] |
Heather: | [walks up to Stan] Stan, I was wrong about you. Would you like to go out again? [Stan looks at her incredulously] |
Teen girl: | Go ahead, Stan. She's everything you ever wanted. [the parents arrive] |
Sheila: | There you are, boys! |
Kyle: | Mom, Dad! |
Stan: | Where the hell have you guys been?! |
Stephen: | Uh, we got a little held up at the time-share sales office. |
Randy: | Yeah, but the good news is we finally came to our senses and bought some shares in a condo. So we all get to come to Aspen for two weeks every year! |
The Boys: | [disappointed] Awwwwww! |
Stephen: | What's the matter? Didn't you boys like skiing? [the song is stopped abruptly] |
Stan: | No! We can't keep track of when you pizza and when you French-fries and when the hot-shot asshole skier takes your girl or if you're supposed to race him the first time or train first to beat him on the really difficult mountain so you can save the dorky but hot girl's youth center. Skiing sucks! [turns right and leads the other boys away] |
Kyle: | Yeah, what a stupid sport! [the parents turn left and follow the boys away] |
Thumper: | [looks at the teen girl] I heard that you were the one responsible for making Tad lose the race. Thanks. |
Teen Girl: | Yeah. Well he really flipped when he saw these. [lifts up her jacket and top again and two creatures appear where her breasts should be] |
Left Creature: | [softly, slowly] Quaid... |
Right Creature: | [softly, slowly] Start the reactor... |
[End of Asspen.] |
| |||||
Story Elements |
"Montage" • "Stan Darsh" • "The Safety Dance" • "Take on Me" • "Don't You Forget About Me" • Thumper • Phil and Josh • Tad Mikowski • K-13 | ||||
Media |
Images • Script • Watch Episode | ||||
Release |


text: IKEA Concept Car A Bad Swedish Joke?Ben Wojdyla3/23/09 10:00amFiled to: Over The Back FenceIKEA LekoIkeaLEKOIKEA Leko ConceptLeko ConceptLeko ConvertibleIKEA Leko ConvertibleLeko CabrioletIKEA Leko CabrioletTop231EditPromoteShare to KinjaToggle Conversation toolsGo to permalinkAn IKEA car sounds like a joke or marketing stunt, but the quirky Swedish furniture maker's got a website touting the just-moments-before-April 1st unveiling of the IKEA Leko Concept. Yeah, we get it.AdvertisementWe're introduced to the car by the car's supposed designer, Christophe Grozs, who extols the virtues of this new environmentally friendly concept car from IKEA. Our French is pretty rusty, but according to the introduction, the car is a modular design which can operate as a coupe or as a convertible, and has the full backing of the World Wildlife Fund France, whatever that means.No further details are offered, and other information about the car is scarce, so we'll just have to sit back and make jokes about home assembly and poorly veneered fiberboard until we get the complete story at the end of the month. [Leko Website via VWVortex]Reply23 repliesLeave a reply

subset: commoncrawl


text:
In a large saucepan, over medium heat, add the olive oil. Season the duck pieces with salt and pepper. When the oil is hot, sear the duck, fat side down for about 4 to 6 minutes. Turn over the duck and continue to sear for 4 minutes. Remove the duck from the pan and set aside. Add the onions and celery to the pan. Season the vegetables with salt and cayenne. Saute the vegetables until wilted, about 4 minutes. Add the sausage and continue to saute for 4 minutes. Stir in the beans, bay leaves, and garlic. Add the duck stock, water and fresh thyme. Place the duck pieces back into the pan. Bring the liquid to a boil and skim off any cloudy scum that has risen to the service. Reduce the heat to a simmer and cook, uncovered for 2 hours, stirring occasionally or until the meat and beans are tender. Season the shrimp with salt and pepper. Add the shrimp to the pot and continue to cook for 8 to 10 minutes, or until the shrimp turn pink and curl their tails in completely. Reseason if necessary and stir in the green onions and parsley. Ladle into serving bowls and serve with crusty bread.
Celebrate the holiday with fun springtime sweets like this adorable bunny cake.


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Certificate Program in Community Building and Urban Education Post-Master's Certificate Program in Institutional Research (PMCIR) Certificate in Instructional Systems Technology (IST)
Program Office: IUPUI, Education/Social Work 2114D, (317) 274-1652.
This program is offered on the Indianapolis campus. The Graduate Certificate Program in Community Building and Urban Education is an interdisciplinary offering provided by faculty representing various schools within IUPUI. It is an inquiry-based, 18 credit hour professional development opportunity designed for the following groups: teachers, counselors, school/ program/business administrators, policy makers, youth development and parks/recreational professionals, and professionals in urban planning, criminal justice, community development fields, and health and human service agencies.
The program is a highly interactive and reflective experience where participants are mentored by practitioners from multiple professions. Mentor and peer interactions have been designed to nurture collaborations and enhance understandings about community and urban school issues. The certificate meets the specific needs of those intending to pursue positions beyond the entry level that require additional certification and/or experience and who are interested in mobilizing a community to meet the diverse needs of its youth.
Required Courses EDUC F505 Interprofessional Collaboration Seminar (3 cr.) EDUC T550 Cultural/Community Forces and the Schools (3 cr.) EDUC T531 Organizational Change in Culturally and Linguistically Diverse Schools (3 cr.) EDUC A560 Political Perspectives of Education (3 cr.) EDUC T590 Independent Study in Urban Multicultural Education (1-3 cr.)
Elective Courses EDUC J637 Curriculum Development Process (3 cr.) SPEA P540 Community and Neighborhood Development Planning (3 cr.) SPEA J550 Mentoring Juveniles as a Form of After-Care (3 cr.) NURS H544 Community Development and Organization for Health (3 cr.) SOC S610 Urban Sociology (3 cr.) ANTH E380 Urban Anthropology (3 cr.) Other electives may be taken with prior approval from advisor.
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Program Office: IUB, Education 4228, (812) 856-8362.
This program is designed for professionals in higher education who already possess a master's or doctoral degree and seek to develop an understanding of the purposes and conduct of research to guide decision making in institutions of higher education. Developed under the sponsorship of the Association for Institutional Research and the National Center for Education Statistics, the PMCIR program provides foundational knowledge about, technical skills in, and guided professional practice of institutional research. Students currently enrolled in a doctoral program may also enroll in this program.
The program consists of 24 credit hours of course work. Full-time students are expected to complete the program in a calendar year. Students must complete a yearlong internship in a university or agency office that utilizes institutional research and complete a culminating experience that includes attendance at a summer workshop focused on using national higher education databases that is conducted by the National Center for Education Statistics and the National Science Foundation or an alternate project approved by the director. A part-time completion option is available for individuals who concurrently work in relevant administrative positions within a higher education institution or related organization.
Fall Semester C665 Higher Education Administration (3 cr.) One course selected from: C670 Problems in Financing Higher Education (3 cr.) C654 Higher Education in the United States (3 cr.) C750 Organizational Theory (3 cr.) U548 Student Development Theory and Research (3 cr.) U549 Environmental Theory and Assessment in Higher Education (3 cr.) U550 Three 1 credit modules in methods and technology of institutional research (3 cr.) C790 Proseminar (1 cr.)
Spring Semester Two courses selected from: C695 Academic Problems in Higher Education (3 cr.) C750 Topical courses (3 cr.) Other graduate courses in higher education approved by the program (3 cr.) U550 Three 1 credit modules in methods and technology of institutional research (3 cr.) C790 Proseminar (1 cr.)
Summer C750 NCES/NSF National Data and Policy Seminar (3 cr.) C790 Capstone Portfolio (1 cr.)
Certificate in Instructional Systems Technology (IST)
Program Office: IUB, Education 2276, (812) 856-8450
This program is designed to enhance skills in and knowledge of instructional technology. The program may be used as a springboard to further career goals, to receive additional training in a career, or to prepare for a master's or Ph.D. program in instructional technology. This certificate program provides a unique opportunity to experience instructional technology at a leading program. Students who complete the program receive a certificate from the School of Education in addition to the course credits on their Indiana University transcript.
Note: The Certificate in Instructional Systems Technology is not a state teaching license nor an endorsement on a teaching license. The master's program requires a separate application; completion of the certificate program does not guarantee admission.
Certificate Requirements
A student must complete five courses (15 credit hours) to fulfill the requirements of the IST certificate program, including four required courses and one elective course.
Required Courses for the Certificate Program
R511 Instructional Technology Foundations (3 cr.) R521 Instructional Design and Development (3 cr.) R561 Evaluation and Change in the Instructional Development Process (3 cr.)
And one of the following production courses (based on prior production experience): R541 Instructional Development and Production Process I (3 cr.) (prerequisite: R521) R547 Computer-Mediated Learning (3 cr.) (prerequisite: R541 or equivalent experience)
Elective Courses for the Certificate Program
Students must complete one elective from the following list: R519 Effective Writing for Instructional Technology (3 cr.) R547 Computer-Mediated Learning (3 cr.) (prerequisite: R541 or equivalent experience) R626 Instructional Strategies and Tactics (prerequisite : R521)
Admission Requirements
Last updated: 28 March 2017 04 18 58


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With Instructables you can share what you make with the world, and tap into an ever-growing community of creative experts.
Dyeing dry noodles for art collages, stringing awesome necklaces, or sorting by color is a breeze! Go back to kindergarten with this easy project. *Note: This new recipe ...
License: None (All Rights Reserved)
Colored noodles, for eating!by caturday_projects
Home made pasta shapesby Computothought
glow noodlesby mikeasaurus


text:
The Gamecocks (4-0, 2-0 Southeastern Conference) won on defense, holding the Commodores (3-1, 1-1) to 77 yards.
South Carolina is 4-0 for the first time in coach Steve Spurrier's seven years with the team.
But it was frustrating for the coach. Quarterback Stephen Garcia threw four interceptions.
Garcia did throw his third touchdown pass, as many as defensive end Melvin Ingram has now scored this season. Ingram recovered a teammate's fumble in the end zone to go with two sacks, a tackle for an 8-yard loss and swatted away a pass.
Garcia's problems caused Spurrier to throw his headset in the first quarter and his playcalling sheet in the second. By the time Garcia threw his fourth pick in the end zone in the fourth quarter, the Head Ball Coach could do nothing more than slowly shake his head as Garcia spoke to him.
Spurrier put backup Connor Shaw into the game in the fourth quarter, his first action since getting the nod to start this year's opener, then being benched after an ineffective first quarter. Spurrier took no chances, running Lattimore on six of Shaw's first eight plays. The other two snaps were designed quarterback runs.
Lattimored finished 77 yards rushing and 73 receiving.
Ace Sanders led South Carolina with four catches for 75 yards. All-SEC receiver Alshon Jeffery had just two receptions for 34 yards.
Garcia did throw a 52-yard touchdown pass to Lattimore in the waning moments of the second quarter that put South Carolina ahead 14-3. But the sophomore running back did most of the work, dodging tackles and picking up a nice block from receiver Nick Jones for the score. Lattimore also scored on a 22-yard run in the third quarter.
South Carolina's defense had struggled for the first three games, allowing 372 yards a contest. But they harassed Vanderbilt quarterback Larry Smith all night, finally knocking him out of the game in the third quarter.
Smith was 12-of-16 passing, but they were almost all short throws. He threw for 44 yards and was sacked six times. Backup Jordan Rodgers, whose older brother is Green Bay Packers star Aaron Rodgers, completed his first two passes, but only gained 2 yards.
Zac Stacy was Vanderbilt's leading rusher with 18 yards on seven carries, while Jonathan Krause caught nine passes for 55 yards.
South Carolina freshman defensive end Jadeveon Clowney forced two fumbles. One of them came after he leaped over a blocker and grabbed Smith's arms, forcing the ball from the Vanderbilt quarterback's hands in the third quarter.
Casey Hayward had two of the Commodores' four interceptions. They have now picked off 14 passes in four games this season. The team record for a season is 24.


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I'm a musician, producer, and founder of Global Music Project.org (promotes artists and produces events that unite people through music and cultural awareness). I'm also the head of Music2Deal.com (community for the music industry) for the USA.
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text:
Donaji & the Magical Poncho
This is the story of a fearless girl and her encounter with the wicked cold wind god
4.33 / 5.00 6,355 Views* I have a trailer for numa numa hentai II in 3D on my home page: purecarnage.com will submit soon to the portal :D
It's Numa Numa, and it's Hentai!!! And not just other people's hentai drawings,
this is all my artwork, no rips. Not safe for the internet, so not safe for kids. Rated XXX, you are warned.
Why Numa Numa Hentai? I am glad you asked. I have a few back burner animations I am going back to finish. This one was started in the beginning of the numa numa craze, then I got busy and after many months decided wtf, let's finish it anyways and give it to the net. This explains the style change half-way through,I go from watcom tablet to hand-drawn line art, I did the line-art to finish the animation because I simply like it better then the watcom tablet.
My goal is also to be in a wide range of NewGrounds catagories so this coveres A
dult, Hentai and Numa Numa all with one sick stone, so if you don't like anime h
entai because you're a pussy, you won't like this animation.
If you are a freak, and I know you are... all the action is halfway through the animation and errupts in a climatic ending.
I am tired of this fucking retarded shit on newgrounds...I mean I'm just sittin here with my vibrator and I run into this crap. Maybe I should become a lesbian so I wont even look for it. I was so horny before I watched this. If you are reading this post, dont watch this submission. I guess I'll go to bed now, or maybe pornhub first. If anybody finds some good lesbian or straight porn on newgrounds, TELL ME PLEASE!!!
what in the name of holy fuck just happened on my screen?!
LMFAO, this is funny and disturbing at the same time! 5 stars, it deserves it.


text:
Shorelands Guest Resort
Photos of Shorelands Guest Resort
TripAdvisor Reviews Shorelands Guest Resort Kennebunk
Travel Blogs from Kennebunk
Saying good by
... then it has gotten progressively better as we traveled south. I can't explain this but the trees were not changing in Canada except near the border. As we get further into Maine it has been more colorful. I didn't download the pictures from the camera before it went back with CW. So I missed the pictures of Kip and the few I took of Acadia. Carolyn flys out early so we say our goodbyes. It has been a few quicks weeks making our own memories. I'm lonely already. 179 ...
Cumberland Fair - Cindy Clark
... was disappointing. On the other side of the harness track are more commercial booths and the mini horses and pulling arena. The maple barn is always a favorite because you can see the whole maple process unfold. The last thing on the path before the campground is an old farm equipment exhibit.
Everyone who has been to a county fair will tell you, the food is the best part! The first booth we visited was a ...
Dalsza czesc roadtripa
Ostatnio nie za bardzo mialem internet zeby cos wrzucac, wiec po krotce bylismy w oceanarium w Filadelfii, mieli tam rekiny i duze hipopotamy, wynajelismy samochod zeby pojechac do six flags i Atlantic city, w six flags bylo super, nie bylo kolejek na rozne kolejki gorskie a maja ich tam duzo, teraz zmierzamy do Atlantic city, potem zostanie nam jeszcze Washington i nowy ...
Lobsters and Lighthouses in Maine
... back and admire the awesome view before us which amazingly we had all to ourselves!
This would certainly be a sunset up there with the best on this trip.
After a great night's rest in our cosy motel, it was back on the road as we started our drive up towards our last National Park, Acadia!
This days driving really bought home how beautiful Maine is. We ...
Portland…and back to New Hampshire
... 8217;t until 8:30pm – we turned onto the gravel road of Puggy Huddle Lane in the tiny mountain community of Randolph. Population 325. Situated on the property of Larry and Yvonne Jenkins, our little mountain cottage was tucked away so well in the White Mountains, you would never have found it unless you were looking for it. Gorgeous views of the Presidential Range were right outside our windows, and with the fireplace on and a message ...


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Salsberry Peak According to the summit register, Salsberry Peak attracts few visitors. It is rather a small peak and lacks a trail; routefinding isn't straightforward. But Dinah and I found one good reason to climb it: it's among the most colorful peaks we've done. Andy Zdon's Desert Summits offers a brief route description: after parking on Highway 178, cross the desert flats and head to Montgomery Spring. From the spring, ascend the saddle north of the summit. It was unusually cold when we set off across the flats, just a few degrees above zero. In my excitement to get going I made a beginner's mistake of heading to the wrong peak. Fortunately it put us off course only slightly and after crossing the flats I corrected our direction. (After summiting, we mostly retraced our steps back, shaving off a little distance. The map depicts our return route.) We found our way to the wash leading to Montgomery Spring but the wash wasn't to our liking. After a steep dry falls prevented us from continuing up the wash, we climbed the ridge on our right. It made more sense to stay high where both travel and navigation were much easier. Still, ridges and ravines precluded a benign and direct approach to the saddle. When we were forced to drop down, the wash running north of and parallel to Montgomery Springs looked gentler so we took it. When we could, we popped up onto ridges where we could take a bearing. As we neared the saddle the rock colours really exploded. Jagged maroon rocks competed with pale-yellow sandstone for our attention. Routefinding relaxed so I was able to sit back (figuratively speaking) and enjoy the stunning scenery. The hike along the summit ridge was no less interesting. Colorful rock outcrops lined the crest. Perhaps one of those rock points was the actual summit, but we made our way to the south end of the ridge where we found a summit register. Last entry: March 2012. |
Entering Death Valley. Salsberry Peak is on the far right.
Crossing the flats. Salsberry Peak is partially seen on the far left.
We were enthralled with Death Valley's landscape
Salsberry Peak ahead
Charleston Peak lies east (mouse over)
Getting closer to the peak
Dropping down to the wash that leads to Montgomery Springs
Dinah scrambles up a dry falls in the wash
My turn
Around this corner we found a dry falls too steep to climb.
We backed up and found a way up the ridge on our right.
Looking back at the wash
The wash on the left leads to Montgomery Spring
Heading to the saddle, we tried to stay on ridges where travel was easier
Looking back
As we neared the saddle the rocks become more vivid
Hiking up to the saddle
A strange gathering of two crows and a hawk
On the colorful saddle
Looking up Salsberry from the saddle
Epaulet Peak lies west (mouse over for a close-up)
Even a cloudy day couldn't subdue the colours (click for a larger image)
Ascending the notch in the cliff band didn't look good because of loose rock on the steep
slope above it (mouse over). Easier to follow a sheep track wending left below the cliff band.
Hiking up the sheep track
On the summit ridge
Dropping through a notch on the ridge
At the end of the ridge we'll find the summit register
Looking back
Dinah makes her way to the summit
Posing on the summit
Sheephead Mountain in the Ibex Hills to the north (mouse over for a close-up)
Heading back
Last look at Salsberry Peak from the car (mouse over for a close-up)
Salsberry Peak 1:24,000 Topo (6.0 mi, 4239 ft, 1503 ft)


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Supernova Systems Inc v. Great American Broadband Inc et al
Supernova Systems Inc
Great American Broadband Inc, Robert L Schmidt and Subodh Nayar
Case Number:
September 10, 2010
Indiana Northern District Court
Fort Wayne Office
Referring Judge:
Roger B Cosbey
Presiding Judge:
Rudy Lozano
Nature of Suit:
Cause of Action:
Jury Demanded By:
Available Case Documents
The following documents for this case are available for you to view or download:
Date Filed | # | Document Text |
March 12, 2012 | 89 | OPINION AND ORDER GRANTING 81 MOTION to Amend/Correct 8 Amended Complaint for Leave to File Second Amended Complaint by Plaintiff Supernova Systems Inc. Clerk DIRECTED to show the proposed Amended Complaint attached as Exhibit B to the Motion as filed. Discovery period reopened until 5/1/2012 for the limited purpose of conducting discovery on the factual matters set forth in the amendment. Signed by Magistrate Judge Roger B Cosbey on 3/12/12. (cer) |
February 9, 2012 | 80 | OPINION AND ORDER granting 53 Motion for Partial Summary Judgment; Count 1 of amended complaint is DISMISSED; Count 2 remains for trial. Telephone Scheduling Conference set for 2/23/2012 10:00 AM before Magistrate Judge Roger B Cosbey for purpose of setting a 3 day bench trial and a final pre trial conf. Signed by Magistrate Judge Roger B Cosbey on 2/9/12. (lrm) |
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text:
Parish Council Members |
Father Christopher Rozdilski: Pastor Phone: (517)351-4627 Email: firstname.lastname@example.com Parish Council Chair: John Johnson Phone: (517)646-8786 Email: firstname.lastname@example.com Parish Council Vice-Chair: Don Dimitroff Phone: (517)321-1266 Email: email@example.com Parish Council Secretary: Cathy Estrada Phone: (517)256-3733 Parish Council Treasurer: Maria Daly Phone: (517)487-9511 Email: firstname.lastname@example.com Parish Council Member: David Long Phone: (517)351-1224 Email: firstname.lastname@example.com |
Brotherhood of St. George |
President: Andrew Shauver Phone: (517) 482-8541 Email: firstname.lastname@example.com |
Sisterhood of St. Helen |
Ecclesiastic Leaders - A Loving & Caring Couple Fr. Christopher & Matushka Sarah Phone: 351-4627 Altar Servers - Committed to serving our Lord Choir -Beautiful Voices / Dedicated Group Choir Director: Dr. Ted Lopushinski Jr. FOCA Youth Group - Our Future Leaders Leader : Shruti Gross Sunday School -Committed to teaching our young the Lord's Way. Coordinator: Jennifer Beck Phone: 651-6668 |


text:
APPLES: Core apples and peel top half. (Use melon baller to core). Place in baking dish, open end up, with approximately 1/2 inch of water surrounding. Sprinkle sugar inside and on top of the apple. Bake approximately 1 hour at 400F, until tender. Cool and serve warm or room temperature (if done in advance, refrigerate until an hour or more before serving). To serve, place room temperature (or hot) apple on plate and pour raspberry sauce over. Sprinkle with toffee pieces.
RASPBERRY CREAM SAUCE: Puree fruit in blender and put through sieve to remove seeds. Combine with sugar, zest and cream. Thin with a little water or a fruity wine if necessary. Seal and refrigerate (for up to two days) until serving.
TOFFEE: Preheat oven to 425F. Line baking sheet with parchment paper. Sprinkle sugar in thin layer. Bake for 10 minutes or until golden brown. Remove from oven and allow to cool completely on baking sheet. When cool break into pieces and remove from sheet.
<!-- no copyright -->
Celebrate the holiday with fun springtime sweets like this adorable bunny cake.


text:
A decade where the best selling albums came from K-Tel and Ronco - The same people who brought us such labour-saving devices as the Fishin' Magician and the Buttonmatic....The Seventies were about having a good time all of the time. People were too busy having sex, getting drunk and/or stoned, eating fish and chips, smoking Woodbine and posing in front of their bedroom mirrors with tennis racquets to worry about the underlying problems.... From Klackers and Curly-Wurly's to The Sex Pistols and Anarchy In The UK via Glitter, Glam and Disco: The seventies remain our favourite era and given half a chance and a bottle of Old Spice we'd be back there again before you could say "Shang-A-Lang"---nostalgiacentral.com1970s Memorabilia Keywords: patent patents print prints gift inventions invent invention shop shopping unique christmas gifts ads advertisement advertisements collectible collectable collectibles collectables memorabilia collecting collector history decade during from the 1970's 1971 1972 1973 1974 1975 1976 1977 1978 1979 70s groovy in seventies decor
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United States
ULM is a public school located in Monroe, Louisiana. With more than 8,645 students enrolled, ULM ranks in the top 100 for one of the best Regional Universities in the South. The FBS program joined the Sun Belt Conference in 2006. The Warhawks have 16 men ... more
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Ruby Dial
National Bank of Canada
Audra Dial
Kilpatrick Townsend & Stockton LLP


text:
THE WORLD HAS BEEN INVADED BY ALIENS! It's up to a nerdy, lazy high school kid to save it!
3.83 / 5.00 7,361 ViewsLog in to save your medals! Don't have an account? Create one for free!
Deus Shift is a competitive, two player strategy game. With nine unique units, and tons of possible strategies, outsmart your opponent and defeat their heart while defending your own.
I've started a Deus Shift Tournament! Sign up/read details here: http://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/topic/1329558
*NOTE:* Deus Shift is not a casual game. You will enjoy the game a lot more if you take the time to learn it (by playing the tutorial) before jumping in. The beginner AI will destroy you if you don't know how to play.
1/11/13 (1.81) - Added the ability to share and browse records of other players.
1/11/13 (1.80) - The AI will now never take more than one minute. It has been optimized some, and if it takes a minute, it goes with the best plan it's thought of and trashes all other plans (this means the AI might not be as good on older computers).
1/5/13 (1.79) - added medals and highscore api. Unfortunately, medals and highscores made before this update will not be displayed.
Way too challenging. This is a flash game. The vast majority of flash game players want to play something for a few minutes then move on. Not spend hours learning everything about it.
Very challenging but fun. Cauldron + Specter is a deadly combination if you can keep it alive. By the same note, if you see an enemy specter, KILL IT FAST.


text:
Video: Sean Price Opens Up A Rap Clinic Serge Fleury | July 16, 2012 5,520 0 Like Tweet Send applications our way, so we can help spread them out to people that desperately need them. Read More Category: Videos Tag: Duckdown, red bull, Sean Price
Video: RedBull's EmSee National Championship / Big K.R.I.T. Performance Serge Fleury | June 1, 2012 4,812 0 Like Tweet Shoutout to the good people over at 2DopeBoyz for this one. Red Bull EmSee is an invitation-only battle series designed to find the best freestyle rappers in the country and give them a national platform to show their skills and earn acclaim. Read More Category: Videos Tag: Big K.R.I.T, red bull
Is Kid CuDi Really Turning His Back On Hip Hop? ReallyP | February 23, 2012 6,121 0 Like Tweet Read More Category: News Tag: Dot Da Genius, Grammy, Kid Cudi, Michael Jackson, red bull, WZRD
Ghostface Killah "Purified Thoughts" Produced By Red Bull Big Tune Winner Frank Dukes Sam | October 25, 2010 6,948 3 Like Tweet Read More Category: Downloads, illness, New Releases Tag: Frank Dukes, Ghostface Killah, Purified Thoughts, red bull
RZA On His Jedi Master Ish Sam | August 5, 2010 6,231 0 Like Tweet Read More Category: illness, News, Videos Tag: Kanye West, nas, Quentin Tarantino, red bull, Rza, Splash! Festival, Wu Tang
Red Bull BC One 2009 Comes To New York (Break Dance Competition) iHipHop Admin | September 24, 2009 43,191 0 Like Tweet Read More Category: contest, Events Tag: break dancing, compition, hip hop dancing, red bull


text:
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August 2016 Issue
Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, Tucson, Arizona
Members Present:
C. Ronald Baird, President
Charlie J. Harris, Jr., President-Elect
Thomas M. Burke, Vice-President
Douglas A. Copeland, Past President
Keith A. Birkes, Secretary
Erik Bergmanis
Susanne B. Bradley
P. John Brady
Hon. Richard C. Bresnahan
Thomas J. Casey
Dana Tippin Cutler
Brian Francka
Carol Chazen Friedman
Mike Greenwell
Richard F. Halliburton
Bruce F. Hilton
John S. Johnston
Aaron D. Jones
Jennifer M. Joyce
Hon. John F. Kintz
William J. Lasley
Mark H. Levison
Max E. Mitchell
Matthew M. Mocherman
Douglass F. Noland
John A. Ruth
Allan D. Seidel
Howard A. Shalowitz
Walter R. Simpson
Wallace Squibb
H.A. Skip Walther
Eric J. Wulff
Present by Phone:
Vincent F. Igoe, Jr.
Thomas M. Lang
Daniel A. Raniere
Patrick B. Starke
Lynn Ann Vogel
James C. Wirken
William R. Bay
Alan B. Gallas
H. Lynn Henry
Edward J. Hershewe
W. Edward Reeves
Also Present:
Chris Janku
Hon. William Ray Price, Jr.
Robert Stoeckl
Hon. Richard B. Teitelman
1. Minutes:
It was moved and seconded that the minutes of the meeting of the Board of Governors of November 17, 2006 and of the Executive Committee meetings of November 17, December 15 and December 18 be approved. The motion was approved.
2. Finance Committee Report:
Mr. Bergmanis reported that the Bar ended the year in a better position
than originally anticipated, with revenues coming in more than expected and disbursements less than budgeted. A narrative summary of the end-of-the-year financial status and statements of receipts and disbursements were distributed to members. It was moved and seconded that the report be approved. The motion was approved.
3. Legislation:
Mr. Birkes directed the attention of Board members to the report containing a list of sponsors for previously approved Bar-drafted legislation. He reported that most of the proposals now have sponsors. All will be introduced in this legislative session. No action was required.
4. Committee Reports:
A. Client Security Fund Committee
Mr. Janku reported that the Client Security Fund payments of $69,258.40 authorized at the November board meeting are proceeding as planned. He also reported that the committee held a meeting in December and is recommending the payment of an additional 19 claims totaling $32,334.92. Four claims were denied at that meeting. He also reported that the Fund received approximately $10,000 in restitution during 2006. It was moved and seconded to approve the additional fund payments as proposed. The motion was approved.
B. Lawyers Assistance Program
Tom Casey directed Board members to a MOLAP Utilization Report contained in their packet, pointing out that 143 cases were opened in 2006 and indicating that the report provides a breakdown of the cases. He commended Jim Brady on his efforts in managing the MOLAP programs. No action was required.
C. Special Committee on the Public Defender System
Mr. Copeland reported that efforts are underway to help provide caseload relief for the Public Defender System. He reported that a Senate Interim Committee was appointed after the 2006 session to look at caseload solutions and that committee is expected to issue its report in the next few weeks. He anticipates that the Senate Interim Committee will not recommend additional FTEs for the Public Defender System. Instead the committee may recommend removing misdemeanor cases from the Public Defender System and contracting with the private bar to handle these matters. He noted that the adding of additional full time staff had been the original approach recommended of the Task Force.
He reported that the Governor does not support the creation of new FTEs in any area of state government. There was some discussion about whether the Bar should publicly oppose this approach and the short-term versus long term ramifications of such action. Additional questions were raised about whether any efforts are underway to change the use, allocation and efficiencies of resources within Public Defender System.
Mr. Copeland also noted that efforts continue to reclassify some offenses, so they do not carry the potential of "loss of liberty" as an additional approach to relieve caseload pressure on the Public Defender System. He indicated that a report on these issues will be circulated to the Board after the Senate Interim Committee recommendations are released, and he will further update the Board at the May meeting.
D. Special Committee on Unbundled Legal Services
Mr. Stoeckl reported for Committee Chair Alan Gallas, providing an update on the work of the committee. He reported that the committee had met on multiple occasions and that a written report is forthcoming. They are awaiting the component focusing on malpractice issues. The report is expected to conclude that the unbundled legal services is an emerging area, that will require rule changes, mainly focused on providing more concrete guidance to lawyers who wish to provide services in this manner. The special committee is working in cooperation with the Supreme Court of Missouri and its Pro Se Commission on the development of rules, several of which are currently under review by the Court's Civil Rules Committee.
E. Special Committee on Online Legal Research.
Messrs. Baird and Birkes reported on efforts to identify and contract with a vendor to provide online legal research as a new member benefit. Mr. Baird noted that after further investigation, the Special Committee is recommending Fastcase as the provider. A contract has been negotiated and reviewed and is included in the meeting materials. Mr. Baird further noted that the initial contract is for two year, with options that extend to a six year term. Cases will go all the way back to 1886. Missouri Bar deskbooks will be incorporated, and it is anticipated that the new member benefit will be up and running on June 1, 2007.
Mr. Birkes reported that the online research would be provided at no
charge to eligible members. He reported that the cost for the program will be approximately $125,000 annually and that the Finance Committee recommends funding the first three years of online legal research using approximately $300,000 that was part of a major medical stabilization fund turned back over to The Missouri Bar 10 years ago, when the Bar discontinued endorsement of the program. He reported that the Insurance Programs Committee has for the past decade been trying to identify a way to use the money to provide some member benefit related to major medical insurance, but the amount was too low in the major medical environment for any meaningful use. It appears this use of the money would be a good way to benefit a large number of Missouri Bar members.
It was moved, and seconded to approve and authorize staff to finalize and contract on the online legal research as proposed and to approve the use of the major medical stabilization fund for the online research services. The motion passed.
5. Appointments:
A. Current Appointments
There were no current appointments for Board consideration.
B. May Appointments
(1) Fee Dispute Resolution Committee
Mr. Birkes reported that the terms of Ms. Karen Woodall and Mr. J. Fred Waltz are expiring and neither is eligible for reappointment. He directed Board members to a list of current membership on that committee included in their packets and reported that the Board will be asked to approve replacements for both members at the meeting in May.
6. Officers Report:
A. Executive Director's Report.
(1) Missouri Bar Headquarters Annex Building Renovation
Mr. Birkes reported that the windows are being replaced in the Annex Building to improve energy efficiency. The renovation is being paid for by the Trustees of The Missouri Bar, the entity that owns the Bar's real property assets. The renovation will benefit The Missouri Bar without incurring any cost.
(2) Mid-Year Seminar.
Mr. Birkes reported that this year's Mid-Year Seminar had the adequate number of registrants necessary to cover direct meeting expenses.
(3) Spring Committee Meetings.
Mr. Birkes reported that the Spring Committee Meetings are scheduled for May 11. Board members will receive information and details.
(4) New Immigration Law Committee
Mr. Birkes reported that 82 Missouri Bar members responded to notices in ESQ. regarding the proposed formation of an Immigration Law Committee and indicating that they would like to belong to such a committee. The Board had authorized the staff to query the membership, responding to a request from membership. It was moved and seconded that The Missouri Bar establish a new Immigration Law Committee. The motion passed.
(5) Annual Reports for the Complaint Resolution and Fee Dispute Resolution Programs of The Missouri Bar
Mr. Birkes called attention to the Annual Reports of both the Complaint Resolution Program and the Fee Dispute Resolution programs of The Missouri Bar.
B. Vice-President's Report.
(1) Location for 2009 Missouri Bar Annual Meeting
Mr. Burke reported that dates for the Annual Meeting were not available at the Renaissance Grand Hotel in 2009, requiring the Bar to look at other locations. He noted that the Adam's Mark Hotel offered excellent facilities, but it was concluded that it would not be appropriate for The Missouri Bar to meet at that location. Two hotel options were left with adequate space needed for the meeting – the Millennium and the Hilton Ballpark. The Hilton Ballpark is adding 6,000 square foot of meeting space in 2007 and we will move forward to contract with that location for the 2009 meeting. He noted that the hotel is directly across from Busch Stadium and will be adjacent to the expected development associated with the "Ballpark Village."
(2) 2009 Mid-Year Meeting Venues
Mr. Burke reported that a number of different areas are under consideration as the venue for the 2009 Mid-Year Meeting, including Mexico. He encouraged members of the Board to communicate any ideas for locations.
(3) Anticipated Initiatives
Mr. Burke discussed some of the initiatives he expects to undertake during his term as president. He indicated that he will continue to focus and maintain continuity between efforts that require long term action, including: civics education, judicial independence, pay issues, Non-Partisan Court plan, Public Defender System, expanded diversity within the Bar.
C. President-Elect's Report
(1) 2008 Initiatives/Focus
Mr. Harris discussed the areas and issues that he expects will be a major focus during his term as president in 2008. He foresees a variety of issues related to the judicial evaluation survey. Issue related to what, if any, role the Bar should play in addressing attacks on the judiciary, especially from groups outside of Missouri, a continuing focus on the development of LPAP and addressing the ongoing problems facing the Public Defender System. He noted that he is in a unique situation as the first African American president of The Missouri Bar to address issues of diversity. He plans to address the issue on a number of different fronts, including getting out into the smaller communities within the state, so members of the Bar will have an chance to get to know him, and hopefully, break down barriers.
He reported that African American and Hispanic lawyers throughout the state have been contacting him and he looks forward to a special opportunity to impact the diversity issue.
D. President's Report.
(1) Judicial Compensation/Funding.
Mr. Baird reported that the Citizen's Commission met in late November and recommended a modest salary increase for judges. He alerted the Board that there are several efforts underway within the General Assembly introducing resolutions to override the Commission recommendation, which goes into effect on February 1, unless vetoed by a 2/3 vote of the General Assembly. Indications are that the resolutions have support in the House; however, they do not have a high level of support in the Senate. The raises are expected to survive and go into effect. He commended the efforts of Wood Cozad and his work in this area. He reported that this will be an ongoing effort.
He reminded members of the Board that it is very effective for members of the Bar to get to know their local legislators and inform the legislators about their support and interest in this issue.
He also pointed out that The Missouri Bar must continue to consider and discuss how the Bar can directly, and in many cases, indirectly respond to unfair criticism of judges, noting that in some cases where a unified Bar cannot respond, a local or specialty bar can.
(2) Civic Education
Mr. Baird reported that civic education initiative continues. He noted that programs developed for Constitution Day and Bill of Right Day both went very well. He also reported that these programs need to be expanded and that it is an ongoing process that meets a very real need in our community. He reported that the Civic Education Committee plans to meet later in the month and plans are underway to stage a civic education summit, where other organizations outside of the legal profession will be invited and efforts will be developed to leverage the communication of the messages.
(3) Judicial Evaluation Survey
Mr. Baird reported that Chief Justice Wolff, during his State of the Judiciary Address, asked the Missouri Bar to look at way to expand the survey. He reminded the Board that a committee was already in place for the Judicial Evaluation Survey.
Plans are to expand the committee to include appointees from BAMSL and KCMBA and to include lay members. Questions were raised about how to get input from members of the Bar who are from the minority community.
It was noted that judges have not been members of this committee, but that efforts are made to get their input. The last time a review was conducted, a survey was sent to all of the judges in the state.
Concerns were raised that the current distribution system presents one of the biggest problems with the evaluation and needs to be focused on. Other concerns were raised about potential bias issues. Mr. Baird noted that several other states have an expanded system and more extensive process and that this committee will look at systems in Colorado and Arizona, states having an extensive judicial evaluation surveys with broader levels of input from within and outside of the legal profession as well as broader distribution to citizens of the state.
It was proposed that the committee be expanded in the following ways:
• The Missouri Bar would appoint 3 lawyers and two lay members
• BAMSL would appoint 3 lawyers and two lay members
• KCMBA would appoint 3 lawyers and two lay members
Mr. Baird proposed appointing Dale Doerhoff as chair, Dana Tippin Cutler and President-Elect Charlie Harris as the three lawyers appointed by The Missouri Bar. Lay members will be added.
It is anticipated that results may be available by the Annual Meeting in September.
A motion was made and seconded to expand the Judicial Evaluation Survey Committee as proposed. The motion passed.
(4) Springfield Annual Meeting.
Mr. Baird reported that work is underway to develop the Annual Meeting in Springfield. He reported that the Annual Meeting Planning Committee is planning to meet near the end of the month to begin CLE program development.
There being no further business, the meeting was adjourned.
Respectfully submitted,
Keith A. Birkes, Secretary
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text:
Spider-Man HC BTS 2.jpg
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Size of this preview: 302 × 479 pixels. Other resolution: 151 × 240 pixels.
- This is a photo from the filming set. It is believed that the copyright holder has granted permission for use in works such as the Marvel Cinematic Universe Wiki under the fair use provision of United States copyright law.
Appears on these pages
A gallery of images of Peter Parker, who is also the superhero Spider-Man.
Spider-Man: Homecoming/Gallery
A gallery of images from, or related to, the film Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Spider-Man Suit/Gallery
A gallery of images of the Spider-Man Suit.
File history
Click on a date/time to view the file as it appeared at that time.
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text: constabless definition March 20, 2017 AZ Dictionary Link to this page noun: The partner of a constable. The wife of a constable. women constable; the partner of a constable. How would you define constabless? All the definitions on AZdictionary were written by people just like you. Now's your chance to add your own! Your Full Name Your definition Post Definition


text:
Incubation: Time is Running Out (Windows)
ESRB Rating Genre Perspective Pacing Setting |
Critic Score
100 point score based on reviews from various critics. 3.8
User Score
5 point score based on user ratings. |
Available for Trade | ||||
User | Platform | Comments | Condition | |
Micro Net (1) | Windows | None | Not Specified | |
Wanted for Trade |
User | Platform | Comments | Desired Condition | |
richard ellicott | Windows | Anyone have the addon pack for this? Bluebyte are now bust and I have only managed to dl the normal game. I have searched for the oxed edition in english, but now have given up so if anyone would trade for somthing, via ftp or burn, i'd appreciate it. please mail me |
Box/Packaging: Excess Defects Original Media: Good Manual: Excess Defects Catalog: Excess Defects Reference Card: Excess Defects Additional Items: Excess Defects (more info) | |
sweet oblivion | Windows | None | Not Specified | |
Karol Jędrzejczyk (4) | Windows | None | Not Specified | |
Jakub Bjaček (149) | Windows | None | Not Specified | |
André Costa (3) | Windows | None | Not Specified |
MobyGames allows you to track the games you own and track the games you want.
Some of the list features include describing the condition of the game, packaging
materials, media, arbitrary comments, trading features and list access
control. So go ahead and start tracking your collection or start trading games
with fellow Moby Users.
To make a trade, contact the user via email. You can get a users email address by clicking on their screen name. Trades are handled independently of MobyGames, use at your own risk. MobyGames specifically disclaims any warranties, including, but not limited to, the implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose.


text:
- Adjustable comfort seat
- Graduated foot wells
- 2 Flush mount rod holders
- Rear round hatch
- Large bow and stern well for storage
- Front, rear and side carry handles
- Front and rear bungees
- Molded-in cup holders
Tandem or Single? | Single |
Length | 124 in - 315 cm |
Width | 31 in - 79 cm |
Height | 13.25 in - 33.7 cm |
Capacity | 300 lbs - 136 kg |
Weight | 47.4 lbs - 21.5 kg |
Customer Reviews (2)
- First kayakReview by Blacksheep6
Quality - Stable little kayakReview by DanP928
Another plus is the comfort of the seat, my butt still felt great even after an all-day trip. I would advise a cheap cushion or towel to prevent the seat from getting hot in the sun when parked. If you're looking for a good, low-priced kayak with great stability then buy this one. (Posted on 6/13/2016)
Write Your Own Review
Q1: Can I buy a spray skirt for my Kayak? If so, where?
A1: Only sit-in kayaks can accept spray skirts, but not all of them do. It all depends on the size of the cockpit and the shape of the lip. Some cockpit dimensions are shown on the product detail page. If you don't see your cockpit dimensions, you can use a tape measure and check the width and length of your cockpit including the lip. To purchase spray skirts, please visit www.sealsskirts.com.
Q2: Regarding the «weight capacity» to a specific kayak, is there a general rule that applies whether it should suit me or not?
A2: The weight capacity stated on the kayak documentation represent the maximum weight the kayak can hold to be fully usable. For a more comfortable ride, always look for a kayak that has a weight capacity approximately 30 to 40lbs above your actual weight. It's even more important for sit-on top kayaks as the closer you are to the weight limit, the deeper will the line of floatation be, resulting in more water coming into the kayak from the scupper holes.
Q3: Where do I find the Serial/Warranty #?
A3: Your kayak's serial number is located behind the seat or on the rear left hand side (when looking at your kayak from the front). Please use this number in order to register your kayak on the Registration section of our website.
Q4: What is the best way to store my kayak?
A4: The ideal way to store a kayak is to sit it on a flat surface. If your kayak remains outdoors, you should keep it covered and out of direct sunlight. Do not leave any straps tightly clinched around your kayak for long periods, especially in warm weather. This could distort the shape of the kayak. For an easy storage and access to your kayak, we recommend to take a look at the different options in the Accessories section of our website.
Q5: I would like to put a rudder system on my kayak, is it possible?
A5: None of our kayaks comes with a rudder system. Even if there are third party rudder system available on the market, we do not recommend the use of any specific one. The installation of a rudder system is done at your own risk. Please note that any permanent alteration of your kayak hull will result in the cancellation of the warranty.


text:
Build a version
The fluent_contents module offers a widget engine to display various content on a Django page.
This engine operates similary like Django CMS, FeinCMS or django-portlets, however, it can be used for any project, or CMS system.
Page contents can be constructed with multiple "content items". You can define your own content items, or use one the available content items out of the box. Standard web sites could use the bundled default content items. Other advanced designs (such as a web site with a magazine-like design, having many blocks at a page) can be implemented quickly by defining content items for the various "style elements" at the page.
Web editors are able to place the "content items" at the page, hence they can fill the content of advanced layouts easily and directly in the Django admin. This also applies to pages which have a "free form" or "presentation slide" design, this module allows the end-user to manage and configure the designed elements at the page.
By default, the following content items are available:
Standard content:
- Text content - write rich text in a WYSIWYG editor (provided by django-wysiwyg).
- Markup - write content with reStructuredText, Markdown or Textile (provided by docutils, Markdown or textile).
- Forms - display forms created with django-form-designer.
Online content:
- Google Docs viewer - display a PDF or DOCX file on a page, using the Google Docs Viewer service.
- OEmbed support - embed content from YouTube, Vimeo, SlideShare, Twitter, and more.
- Twitter feed - display a Twitter timeline, or realtime search timeline.
For programmers:
- Code - display code snippets with highlighting (provided by Pygments).
- Gist - display Gist snippets from Github.
- IFrame - display an <iframe> on the page.
- Raw HTML content - include jQuery snippets, or "embed codes" by other services.
- Commentsarea - display comments on a page (provided by django.contrib.comments).
- Disqusarea - display DISQUS comments on a page (provided by django-disqus).
- Form-designer link - display a django-form-designer form on a page.
For more details, see the documentation at Read The Docs.
The PlaceholderField is nicely integrated in the Django admin interface:
Secondly, it's possible to build a CMS Page interface with the PlaceholderEditorAdmin, which displays each content placeholder in a tab:
Last Built
7 months, 3 weeks ago passed
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text:
Jakarta, Indonesia
Executive recruitment company Monroe Consulting Group Indonesia is recruiting on behalf of one of the world's leading pharmaceutical and healthcare companies. Our respected client is seeking a tax and statutory professional with a background in auditing, preferably with experience with one of the Big 4 Audit Firms, for the job of Tax and Statutory Analyst (Manager), to be based in Jakarta, Indonesia.
Key job responsibilities include:
- Provide first line financial leadership and ensure legal, regulatory and tax compliance for specific financial reporting team, working closely with Indonesia (Local Operating Companies) and BPO (Business Process Outsource) to achieve objectives
- Ensure the provision of accurate and compliant financial and tax reporting services to internal and external authorities
- Prepare GAAP adjustments and complete drafting statutory accounts, compile information required to draft statutory disclosures, co-ordinate completion of tax disclosures by KPMG, supporting PwC audit and resolve queries raised
- Oversee the Group's Tax reporting process, including organising deliverables and timetable with KPMG and PwC, calculating material GAAP adjustments and review of the tax calculations prepared by KPMG
- Co-ordinate corporate tax and transfer pricing compliance processes on behalf of Company's Indonesian markets including,
- Analyse tax sensitive account codes to determine tax treatment
- Source data required for the tax return not derived from the General Ledger or Fixed Asset register (e.g. information required to calculate R&D tax credit).
- Resolve queries raised by audit firm during tax return process and perform review of draft tax return.
- Estimate forecast profitability for the purposes of estimating interim tax payments
- Monitor the tax accounts and reconcile balances back to tax authority records and submitted tax returns
- Prepare withholding tax clearances and other ad hoc tax filings required
- Monitor tax risks and review quarterly risk questionnaire
- Review of draft Indirect Tax and statistical returns on behalf of company including Sales, purchase and miscellaneous transaction review including invoice sampling Resolution of exception items; Correction of errors found, including any consequent GL postings; Trend analysis; Clear and complete documentation of the above
- Carry out historical review of legal entity profitability to ensure compliance with company transfer pricing policies, liaising with Global Tax on exceptions and material markets
- Co-ordination of tax and TP audits, liaising with FD in market and Global Tax to provide support in responding to queries and resolving tax disputes
- Ensuring Indonesia document retention requirements relating to statutory reports, taxes and TP are met
- Manage escalations from customers, senior stakeholders and external authorities
- Manage the statutory audit process for the BSC and ICSS teams liaising with the outsource provider, the market FDs and internal and external audit
- Other support and analysis activities as required to support the needs of Global Tax and/or Market Finance Partners/FDs.
- Work closely with the risk management function to ensure services provided are complaint and risks are managed
Job Requirements
- Bachelor's degree, preferably majoring in tax, finance or accounting
- External auditor for at least 3 years (preferably from PWC, KPMG, Deloitte, or EY)
- Very good understanding of Indonesian GAAP (PSAK)
- Statutory audit background
- An understanding of the wider principles of Corporate Tax, Indirect Taxes and Transfer Pricing
- Experience of Audit/ Tax accounting and/or Transfer Pricing in a manufacturing & distribution business
- English – both written and spoken
- Business and financial acumen with experience in financial analysis and reporting
- Ability to coordinate various people among different function within the company
If you feel that you cameet the qualification and up to the challenge, please send your complete application (application letter, resume, expected salary and any related supporting documents) and current color photograph at size 4 x 6 cm by clicking button bellow
Anda perlu masuk untuk melamar pekerjaan ini
Kesimpulan Review
- Pros
- Jam kerja yang fleksibel sehingga dapat dikondisikan sesuai dengan karyawan, jenjang karir yang diberikan sangat jelas dan terbuka untuk seluruh karyawan.
- jam kerja yang ditetapkan di perusahaan ini cukup fleksibel dan tidak mengikat karyawan. Selain itu, budaya perusahaan juga sangat mendukung pekerjaan yang ada.
- Cons
- Perusahaan kurang memberikan kegiatan pelatihan dan pengembangan kepada karyawan sehingga karyawan belum memiliki kualitas yang begitu baik. Karyawan juga sulit mengerti pekerjaan yang diberikan oleh perusahaan.
- Dalam segi pengadaan traning masih kurang dan harus ditingkatkan agar perkembangan karyawan tidak terhambat dan kinerja karyawan pun akan terus meningkat.
Jl TB Simatupang, Kav. 36 Jakarta, Sovreign Plaza Building, 16th Floor


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Thank you so much! I've only just seen this xoxo
Hey, i only saw your message today. Thanks for the bday wishes and wish you a happy 2017!
Lol! Thank you! A little late. Merry Christmas! If you're ever on Facebook I'm there as Sherrie Livingston. A very Happy New Year! Sherrie / Lilybelle
Thanks Ken I hope you had a great day too.
Thank you, Ken. Very sweet of you.
Thank you so much, I appreciate your help and to you, a wonderful evening too.
Thank you! my collection is small and lacking niche, but nevertheless, I am proud of it. yours is wonderful too!
thank you so much! apologies for the much delayed reply, I have been quite busy since forever
Thanks Ken....I just saw this message I am sorry for the late reply. Stay scented.
New Member
Basenotes Junkie
Super Member


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Supervisor Human Resources-Facility
If you are a current PVH Associate, please click this link to apply through your Workday account.
Design Your Future at PVH
Supervisor Human Resources-Facility
Position Summary: Assists the Human Resource Manager with maintaining a pulse on associate morale, timely processing of worker's compensation claims, labor and employee relations/investigations, onboarding of new associates in addition to monitoring Company/Human Resource policy compliance. Basic knowledge of employment law is required. Shift schedule must be flexible.
Primary Responsibilities/Accountabilities of the Job:
Partner with Ops management to hold associates accountable and provide policy/procedure enforcement support. Maintain warehouse and office bulletin boards ensuring legal compliance. Conduct thorough investigations and make recommendations for disciplinary action when necessary/appropriate. Assist with conflict resolutions. Assist with coordinating/executing associate relations activities. Assist with pre-assessment program for applicants. Administer our proximity card security badge system. Assist in keeping associates informed of all changes in personnel policies. Stay current with changes in employment law. Work with HR Manager to coordinate/execute the following programs: Safety and Workers Compensation, FMLA, LOA, attendance, vacations, bereavement, disciplinary actions and others as designated. Maintain working relationship with Union stewards/officials and adheres to terms of labor contract by monitoring day-to-day implementation of policies concerning wages, hours and working conditions. Assist with coordination of activities and events to accomplish Corporate Objectives (Associate Development, Diversity and Community Service). Other duties as assigned The ability to work in a constant state of alertness
It is the policy of PVH Corp. to ensure equal employment opportunities to all qualified persons without regard to race, gender, religion, age, national origin, citizenship status, disability, qualified veteran status, marital status, or sexual orientation.
Continue exploring our current job opportunities and take the next step towards designing your future.
Meet Some of PVH's Employees
Nicholas C.
Director of Production & Content, PVH
Nicholas and his team continually develop innovative projects to shine a spotlight on and grow PVH's large portfolio of brands.
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Sorry! This item is unavailable.
Grey Ceramic Hand Painted Rock Stone Flower Herb Garden Plant Pot Container.
I have for sale a novelty ceramic plant pot, which was hand painted by myself. It is in the shape of a large piece of grey rock or stone. This one has a lovely smiling face, the back part of the rock looks like it has been hollowed out. This pot has no drainage holes in the bottom, so it could be used indoors or out. This would make a fun and novel addition to anyone's home or garden, or perhaps add a plant and give it as a gift.
The size approx: Height 12cms x Width 18cms. Inside pot diameter: 13cms x 6cms.
If you wish to purchase more than one item from my shop, please contact me and I will combine the p&p. If not, pay in full and I will refund you back the difference. Thank you.
Local collection is welcome.
For postal prices to the Highlands of Scotland, the Isle of Man, the Shetlands and outside of the UK, please contact me.
Please feel free to ask me any questions about any of my items. Thanks for looking.
Shipping & delivery
This item will be posted to you by Allsorts Of Ceramics within 1 day of receiving payment.
Shipping destination | Cost | Additional items |
United Kingdom | £4.00 |
Returns Policy
You have 14 days, from receipt, to notify the seller if you wish to cancel your order or exchange an item.
Unless faulty, the following types of items are non-refundable: items that are personalised, bespoke or made-to-order to your specific requirements; items which deteriorate quickly (e.g. food), personal items sold with a hygiene seal (cosmetics, underwear) in instances where the seal is broken.