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Analysis: Sony looks to PS4 to reverse its fortunes
February 20, 2013 | By Chris Morris
25 comments
The reveal was just the beginning.
Sony's unveiling of the PlayStation 4 Wednesday was the start of a long, carefully planned marketing campaign that will culminate in its release this holiday season. And while the company might be focusing gamer attentions on the new hardware, the touchscreen controller and several big name games, what's really at stake is a whole lot bigger.
The PlayStation is a cornerstone of Sony's ongoing rebuild -- along with the mobile and digital imaging. And if the PS4 has sales that are as disappointing as the PS3, it could be devastating.
"In many parts of the world, [Sony] is bordering on irrelevance compared to where it was 12 years ago," says P.J. McNealy, CEO and founder of Digital World Research. "There's still a core market segment that loves the brand, but that market share is shrinking. They need to raise their base."
On a gut check level -- as well as a checklist level -- the company seems to be hitting a lot of the important marks. The focus on social integration is a wise move, given how quickly that field is growing in the video game space. It also gives Sony the opportunity to establish a viral presence on YouTube and other social outlets, as funny (and perhaps particularly skilled shots) are bound to be circulated widely.
Integrating today's most popular technology -- smartphones -- is also smart. To ignore them would be ludicrous and self-delusional.
All in all, Wednesday's press event was a solid triple for the company. It failed to knock it out the park, though. The reveal that
, already slated for PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360, would launch on the PS4 was a bit anticlimactic -- and the porting of last year's
Diablo III
wasn't exactly the barn burner Activision Blizzard and Sony were likely hoping for.
But word that Bungie would be creating exclusive
content for the PS4 was a positive -- and will certainly be a bragging right for Sony in months to come. (Expect lots of inferences that the new PlayStation has stolen Microsoft's crown jewel.)
Similarly, Gaikai's Dave Perry had lots of
grandiose visions to discuss
, but none of the truly big ones -- like backward compatibility through the cloud and PS4 to Vita game transfers -- seemed to be on the immediate horizon. And investors are savvy enough to know that Sony has made those sort of promises in the past and failed to live up to them.
Then there are the big questions Sony didn't even bother addressing, most notably price.
"They need to show that they've figured out... a value proposition that doesn't start at $600, and they need to figure out what their brand means now," says McNealy.
And while it's still highly unlikely that the system will block used games, the fact that Sony didn't squash the whispers means they'll continue to hang over the company -- and investors will continue to worry that the company may alienate a segment of its audience.
(Also, it's worth noting that the lack of clarity on the issue will continue to hang over GameStop's stock.)
But Sony certainly succeeded in throwing down the gauntlet for Microsoft. And it made a pretty good case that consoles, while they're evolving, are hardly dead.
"Just as a phone is no longer just a phone, a console is no longer just a console," says McNealy. "These devices will still be worthwhile and it will be a nice package to get entertainment into the home."
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GameViewPoint Developer
20 Feb 2013 at 6:32 pm PST
I'm at the point now where I'm not sure hardware really matters anymore. Give me a good App store to target and great cross-platform tools and I'm set.
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Rodolfo Rosini
20 Feb 2013 at 7:12 pm PST
You are absolutely right, the OS is a commodity, the hardware is a commodity. With the demise of retail the new bottlenecks where you can create value for consumers is the app store and the dev kit to make games. I think that once that is solved then discoverability will be the next frontier (like it's already a bit on iTunes) but in order to get there we need a massive output of games that overwhelms what a core gamer can play and the tools to make them are not yet there.
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GameViewPoint Developer
20 Feb 2013 at 7:51 pm PST
The true battle of the next generation is not hardware but App stores. For whoever wins that battle will be sitting on a whole pot of 30% F2P IAP gold.
As for tools, the most likely candidate right now is Unity.
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Merc Hoffner
20 Feb 2013 at 9:06 pm PST
While I think you may be right in the sense of the actual processing element, my argument always comes back to the interface. Games are inherently interactive and the user experience is totally dependent on how they physically connect with the software. Universal generic pointing interfaces like touchpads and keyboards can work well for some forms of gaming, but fall very short for all potential gaming. As such hardware can be endlessly minimised but it must always stop at the controller. And without someone left to iterate, innovate and sell the controller, the forms of gaming available would become increasingly generic and stagnated. Game evolution would be confined to increasingly abstract 'high level' mechanics like character concepts, user generated content, story, scripting and artistry - you know, all nice things, but having more to do with video than gaming. The original Super Mario Bros. is now as primitive as can be imagined (heck, go back to pong), but there's a visceral something in the instant physicality, something in the jumping and the sliding, that's immediately satisfying, and immediately un-replicable with a mouse.
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Simon Ludgate
20 Feb 2013 at 6:53 pm PST
I think it really comes down to good game and exclusive games. When they had Squeenix's Final Fantasy brand director standing on the stage, that was the moment they needed him to say that FFXV was going to be PS4-exclusive. And he didn't. That was a painful moment.
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Jeferson Soler
20 Feb 2013 at 7:00 pm PST
@ Simon Ludgate - Ouch!
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Ron Dippold
20 Feb 2013 at 7:32 pm PST
Yes, that was a head-scratcher, especially after showing off last year's tech demo. Was there anyone who actually thought that PS4 would not have Final Fantasy games of some sort?
Same with most of those reveals. Of course Watchdogs would be on PS4 (and others), of course Destiny would be on PS4 (and others).
For exclusives as shown there's iNFAMOUS 3 (eh, given 2), Killzone 4 (eh), whatever Media Molecule was demonstrating (not sure what it is, but it looks interesting and I'm sure it'll be great), Knack (could be fun!). And of course David Cage's Old Man Simulator 9000.
So was a pretty weak show as far as that goes. I have to assume they've got more held back from Naughty Dog and Santa Monica, right?
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Carlo Delallana
20 Feb 2013 at 11:55 pm PST
Do people still care about Final Fantasy? I believe it's not the system-seller it once was (outside of Japan)
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Ron Dippold
21 Feb 2013 at 12:30 am PST
@Carlo - They might if it were an exclusive. *badump*
Seriously, it probably wouldn't help much outside of Japan, but Japan is still a market Sony would really like to win this generation for lots of reasons. And there's still Nintendo - maybe. Why even haul him out otherwise, or show off last year's tech demo?
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Simon Ludgate
21 Feb 2013 at 8:54 am PST
Yeah, the care is in the exclusivity, as Ron Dipplod points out, more than the game itself. Sony held Final Fantasy exclusivity for a while (various PC releases notwithstanding), until the XBox 360 came out and FFXIII was announced for both major platforms. That title was seen with scorn by certain FF fans, as if Squeenix was "dumbing down" the Final Fantasy Formula for the XBox generation.
A return to Playstation exclusivity is not only a nominal success for Sony in returning to the way things were (when the PS2 dominated), but also a nominal success for FF fans in returning to the way things were (when PS1 and PS2 Final Fantasy games were awesome).
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Jeferson Soler
22 Feb 2013 at 1:15 pm PST
@ Simon Ludgate - "A return to Playstation exclusivity is not only a nominal success for Sony in returning to the way things were (when the PS2 dominated), but also a nominal success for FF fans in returning to the way things were (when PS1 and PS2 Final Fantasy games were awesome)." Don't count on the title as been an exclusive just yet! Don't get me wrong as I understand the importance of keeping some 3rd-party games as exclusive/timed exclusive to certain systems (especially after seeing the consequences of Epic Mickey 2 going multiplatform instead of being a Wii exclusive/timed exclusive) and will admit that the FF title for the PS4 will do well if it remains as an exclusive/timed exclusive to the PS4. However, I'm not so sure if Microsoft will let that be so. Microsoft is not above doing anything drastic in an attempt to one up their opponents.
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Bob Johnson
20 Feb 2013 at 7:11 pm PST
Maybe consoles are dying. At least consoles as they were.
OUYA isn't the answer. But something for $200-$250 with a digital-only store might be. IT is more about the experience that the best specs.
The games I saw (and I didn't see all of them yet) were a bit flashier versions of stuff we are already playing. Games that probably are becoming too bloated or predictable already.
I wanted to see that true next-gen experience. I didn't feel like I saw that yet. Maybe having a pc that already does nice graphics lessened the impact?
But at the same time maybe the kids feel different. Definitely not marketing to me any more.
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Jeferson Soler
20 Feb 2013 at 7:18 pm PST
@ Bob Johnson - "Maybe consoles are dying. At least consoles as they were.
OUYA isn't the answer. But something for $200-$250 with a digital-only store might be."
In that regard, you could say that Nintendo did prepare the 3DS and the Wii U for what I would like to consider to be the inevitable. Sony may be trying to do the same thing with the PS4.
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Roberto Dillon
20 Feb 2013 at 7:21 pm PST
"I wanted to see that true next-gen experience."
We all want that but expecting it at the first announcement is a bit unrealistic. We'll get it a couple of years into the lifecycle ;)
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GameViewPoint Developer
20 Feb 2013 at 8:07 pm PST
Unrealistic? it's 2013! it's been SEVEN years since the last consoles arrived. The whole gaming ecosystem has radically changed due to mobile. Sony had some cool ideals, but it looks to me a whole lot of restraint is being shown, probably because people just really don't know where it's all heading. The PS4 might be the machine for right now, but I suspect will age quicker than the last one has.
Consoles aren't dying, they have died! that's pretty obvious to anyone who has has even the slightest interest in the gaming industry.
I don't think people really see gaming machines anymore like they did 20 years ago, they just see games/apps and they want them on whatever device is closest to them, wether it be a phone or a TV set. Just in the same way that most people don't see "camera's" anymore, they just see photos, and apps to manipulate those photos and want to be able to take a photo with the device which is handy to them, i'e their phone.
After the Sony event though it's going to be interesting to see what MS come up with, because if they just announce a powerful PC in a slick box, an enhanced version of Xbox live and remote play it's going to look like they are just copying Sony.
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Jannis Froese
20 Feb 2013 at 8:33 pm PST
Hardware wise the PS4 very similar to a gaming pc, but a giant leap from current-gen consoles. I sure hope that this not only gives us nice looking old men but also better physics, and new types of gameplay, perhaps some more reactive open world experiences. Only time will tell what developers make of it. The trailer show today didn't show much yet.
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Doug Poston
21 Feb 2013 at 3:10 pm PST
"..probably because people just really don't know where it's all heading."
This is why I feel sorry for all three platforms.
They all need(ed) to come out with something right at this weird point of time.
4K TVs are just starting to come out, so these games will look sadly low-rez in 3-5 years.
Internet service in most of the US is still shit, so you can't bank on always-on, high bandwidth, low-latency streaming of games.
The world economy is still sluggish at best.
And their target market can barely find enough time to look up from their smart phones to notice that there is a TV in their living-room.
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Fernando Fernandes
20 Feb 2013 at 7:24 pm PST
I can only say... Meh.
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Jason Chen
20 Feb 2013 at 9:15 pm PST
hardware matters for developers, not users.
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GameViewPoint Developer
21 Feb 2013 at 5:38 am PST
But if you are using a tool like Unity does it even matter for developers anymore?
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Jeremy Reaban
21 Feb 2013 at 2:34 am PST
The Vita is the monkeywrench in that plan. There are a lot of dispirited and disgruntled Vita owners out there, dismayed by the lack of game for the device. (Well, not a lot of Vita owners, but of those that exist, many are)
Sony should just pull the plug on the Vita if they aren't going to support it. Release firmware turning it into an Android device, at least let people get games from the Google store or something.
Remote Play is a kludge at best, it's less than ideal for Vita owners (since they have to spend $400+ for a PS4 and $60+ for games) and less than ideal for PS4 owners wanting a offscreen experience, since the Vita has no triggers (and no, the back touch pad is not an adequate replacement) and very small buttons
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GameViewPoint Developer
21 Feb 2013 at 5:41 am PST
The whole Vita thing looks like Sony attempt to do something with it, it's almost as if they think "well this is going down hill what use can we get out of it? oh I know!"
What would of been really cool, would of been enabling remote play from any screened device, so say from a tablet or phone......cue Microsoft.
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Christian Keichel
21 Feb 2013 at 6:46 am PST
"What would of been really cool, would of been enabling remote play from any screened device"
But how should the controls work on touch only devices? Besides, from what I have seen from NVidia's Shield, it seems to be hard to overcome the lag, if you haven't a pair of devices designed to work in such way, like the Wii U.
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Jarod Smiley
21 Feb 2013 at 8:02 am PST
There's no one saying Buy a PS4 just to use vita, it's obviously a bonus for people who do have one, and who plan on getting a PS4. Not to mention, this event was about PS4, and they clearly stated, PS vita plans will be reveal at a later time.
I took the exact opposite from this conference with regards to Vita. I think the reason Sony has been smug and nonchalant about Vita's sells is because the all the pieces aren't assembled yet. It is clearly a helper device for PS4, that also is another console to get content on. Whether this all comes to fruition is another story, but I least like the philosophy. And especially like the philosophy of PS4. If the platform is truly open, it should be a very easy device to flow with the trends.
Overall great conference. Clear vision, simple platform design, and unattainable goals. I have ABSOLUTELY ZERO interest in gaming on my smart phone or tablet so I truly don't see why people are going crazy over these new input devices like it's where the next Call of Duty or Gran Tursimo will be played on. Sony simply needs an infrastructure to match Steam/Xbox, and leave it as open as possible, perhaps an Open-Source section of the store so they can get indy's on there platform A LOT easier, and PS4 is a go in my book.
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Dominique Louis
21 Feb 2013 at 9:37 am PST
@Jeremy I think the PS-Vita will prove key to the PS4's success or failure. Decent hardcore gaming on the move, has yet to be realised. the PS4 PS-Vita combination makes this possible.
Remember the Casual gamers of today, will become the hardcore gamers of tomorrow, once they hooked :).
@GameViewPoint Developer I agree with @Christian. How do you automagically translate full analog thumbsticks, R1, R2 and R3 and the left versions onto touch devices? I'd wager it would be horrendous. Having the PS4 and PS-Vita have nearly identical controls and only the image size being different is workable as you can just scale the image being sent from the PS4.
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text:
French President Francois Hollande (L), flanked by Junior Minister for Food Industry Guillaume Garot, delivers a speech during his visit to the 50th International Agricultural Show in Paris, February 23, 2013. The Paris Farm Show runs from February 23 to
DAKAR (Reuters) - France said on Saturday its nationals were at risk of kidnappings or attacks in the West African state of Benin, warning of a specific danger close to neighboring Niger.
The advisory came after a French family of seven, including four children, were abducted by suspected Islamist militants in Cameroon on Tuesday, the first case of foreigners being seized in the mostly Muslim north of the country.
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"Despite the Benin authorities committing to increase security in particular areas, the risk of kidnappings and attacks exists in Benin," the foreign ministry said in an updated travel advisory on its website.
It warned its 3,700 citizens in Benin to avoid going out at night and against all travel on the main road leading from Tchaourou, about 350 kilometers north of the capital Porto-Novo, to Malanville and the W National Park on the border with Niger.
The United States and African governments are backing the six-week-old campaign against militants in Mali, where Benin has also sent troops to join an African force being deployed.
Islamists have threatened to strike back at anyone who supports the mission.
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Security forces are searching for the family who were taken into Nigeria, local police said on Friday.
French President Francois Hollande said on Saturday there was no new information on the whereabouts of the hostages.
(Reporting By John Irish; Editing by Stephen Powell)

subset: commoncrawl


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NCSL Fall Forum: Dec. 1, 2011
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Moderators Senator Joni Culter, South Dakota Representative Chris Perone, Connecticut
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A clearing and settlement code of conduct released by Australia's incumbent exchange last week signals the venue operator will look to consolidate its current monopoly position before equities clearing competition begins in the country. read more>
Post-trade solutions provider Omgeo has launched a new tool that lets firms maximise their existing asset inventory for collateral when trading, ahead of new OTC derivatives rules. read more>
Global banking house Citi will expand its custody offering to include segregated collateral accounts as central counterparties prepare to offer such accounts in line with new regulations. read more>
Moscow Exchange has formally begun shifting its settlement period to a T+2 regime, as it pursues initiatives to modernise its market and raise competitiveness. read more>
Global post-trade services provider Clearstream will link up with Bloomberg to improve trade processing for tri-party repurchase transactions, as market participants look to the repo market to quench their thirst for collateral. read more>
A review of options by Deutsche Bank for closer integration of clearing and settlement processes in the ASEAN region suggests that participating markets stand to benefit from a reduction in cost and risk. read more>
A new white paper from Omgeo suggests that, if achieved on a global scale, improved settlement efficiency could be one of the most positive examples of post-trade infrastructure reform since the onset of the financial crisis. read more>


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18-09-2012, 06:02 AM | #17 (permalink) |
International Debutant
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: South Central
Posts: 2,657
Not at all happy with the squad. As many have mentioned, Morgan has done nothing whatsoever to deserve selection; is probably surprised himself, which tells you all you need to know. Opening with Trott is not a viable option, especially after the dip in form he's suffered over the past year or so, it can hardly help his own problems to shift him up the order. Fortunately I don't think this will happen, taking two potential openers in Root and Compton with us. Unfortunately I think we'll open with Root and play Compton at 5/6 which isn't the way I would go. Root does not look ready for international cricket, let alone Test cricket.. Leaving Taylor out is a horrible u-turn, I don't care what his Lions record in the subcontinent is like, if you have put faith in him for two matches before a tour of India, to then discard him completely is absurd. And for Morgan. Yuck.
So yeah, not overly optimistic as per. |
18-09-2012, 06:26 AM | #18 (permalink) |
Cricket Web Staff Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: high dudgeon
Posts: 9,743
I can see the selectors' dilemma but Morgan for Taylor is a real kick in the teeth for Taylor - that apart I've seen worse, though I can't imagine Samit and Monty are going to play much and certainly not together - would have liked to see a gamble taken on Borthwick
18-09-2012, 06:31 AM | #19 (permalink) |
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Doing the stance
Posts: 42,658
Taylor did look out of his depth in the two tests he played. Personally I think that's more than enough to garner an idea where a player is in terms of development and basic talent.
I don't necessarily agree with Morgan's selection, but one can kind of see the logic in light of Strauss's retirement, Pietersen's flounce/dispute and Bopara's ongoing softcockery/lack of form. He can (note the emphasis) play spin well (in fact, next to Trott, he's probably the best equipped to do so in the squad who've actually played more than half-a-dozen tests) & has scored vital runs in internationals. The trouble is that he's not in prime nick (getting there, but not yet arrived), has barely scored a first class run all summer and was woeful in the UAE.
- As featured in The Independent. "This is not the time for namby-pamby promising youngsters who might just do something; not the time for building for the future. Pragmatism rules and they don't come more pragmatic than Rogers." - Victor Marks makes the case for stiff-legged and stiff-armed 35 year old left-handers in Ashes squads |
18-09-2012, 06:33 AM | #20 (permalink) | |
Hall of Fame Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Columbus, IN
Posts: 15,221
Cook (c)
Root Trott Bell Morgan Prior (wk) Patel Broad (vc) Swann Anderson Finn Looks a pretty solid line up to me... Would this be the likely XI as things stand?
We miss you, Fardin. :(. RIP. Quote:
Member of CW Red and AAAS - Appreciating only the best. Check out this awesome e-fed: PWE Efed |
18-09-2012, 06:41 AM | #22 (permalink) | |
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Doing the stance
Posts: 42,658
Cook* Trott Bell Bairstow Compton Morgan Prior+ Broad Swann Anderson Finn/Panesar Maybe Bres for Finn/Monty if we wanna stack the batting. |
18-09-2012, 06:51 AM | #23 (permalink) |
Eyes not spreadsheets
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: England
Posts: 56,346
Can't see them not play 3 seamers having picked 5 in the squad.
Suspecting Cook Root Trott Bell Bairstow Compton Prior Broad Swann Anderson Finn
marc71178 - President and founding member of AAAS - we don't only appreciate when he does well, but also when he's not quite so good! Anyone want to join the Society? Beware the evils of Kit-Kats - they're immoral apparently. |
18-09-2012, 07:39 AM | #26 (permalink) |
Hall of Fame Member
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Location: North East England
Posts: 18,557
Yep pretty much. Although I think Compton will bat above Bairstow. Pitches in India generally offer something to all bowlers and India obviously play spin better than seam. Morgan I assume is there as an emergency selection if everyone goes down with Delhi belly.
National Scrabble Champion 2009, 8th in 2009 World Championships, gold medal (team) at Causeway, 2011 Masters Champion 24 Hour Scrabble World Record Attempt for Charity, in aid of Daisy Chain and End Polio Now Countdown Series 57 Champion King of the Arcade Reply from mods to my prank bans in public: Reply from mods to my prank bans in private: MSN - evil_budgie @ hotmail.co.uk |
18-09-2012, 08:06 AM | #29 (permalink) |
International Debutant
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: South Central
Posts: 2,657
Reckon the selectors' logic behind Morgan is that, because he seems to have sorted out that strange trigger movement of his and is now scoring OD runs again, he will also have sorted out his Test form. Conveniently forgetting that his other problems of nicking off and playing good spinners remains having played next to no first class cricket since his diabolical tour of the UAE.
18-09-2012, 08:27 AM | #30 (permalink) | ||
International 12th Man
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Leeds, G.O.C.
Posts: 1,644
Wouldn't bring Patel in for Morgan I'd go with Compton Isn't in much form himself either. I'd open with Compton though rather than Root at this stage although that said the last bloke in his early 20s to make a test debut for us while an opener didn't do too badly.
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Wednesday, 22 May 2013 Written by // Evan Howard Categories // Evan Howard, Gay Men, Health, Sexual Health, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific
March 15, 2013 - 11:30 pm
Met a guy last night online who was visiting LA for the weekend. We meet up this evening and found we had more than just a simple mutual attraction. He's newly POZ (just six months) so when he got an eyefull of the tattoo he was a bit confused but being in the medical field he quickly connected the dots. His reaction, like many, was supportive yet I got the distinct feeling it wasn't for him. Coming from a more traditional background I think being openly gay and now POZ was more than enough for him to deal with though he did have a nice tribal tattoo. I wonder if the tattoo would have been an issue for him if we wanted something more serious or maybe he would want one as well ... there's a thought.
March 17, 2013 - 12:30 am
We decided to meet up late this evening but because I presently have roommates and like my privacy we chose a more 'interesting' venue to hang out at, the local gay bathhouse. To be honest I have avoided the bathhouses for many years as they no longer hold much appeal. But lacking a place, seeing how he had never been to one before and me desiring to gauge the reaction of people to the tattoo in a sexually charged environment, the bathhouse on a late Saturday evening was the perfect place.
We did the grand tour of the smallest bathhouse in LA and while he was filling his eyes with the sights - bathhouses by nature defy description so I will not attempt - I was focused on the patrons and their reactions … which was nothing. That said, we were never approached, nor did we approach anyone to get any sort of reaction. After a thorough once over of the place we retired to our room and later headed out to West Hollywood.
March 17, 2013, 2:30 am
We arrived at one of my old haunts, the now remodelled Mickey's bar for after hours but instead of dancing we found ourselves on the patio talking. He attended small high school where he was openly gay, a handsome guy who was into weightlifting at the time and had the respect of his fellow classmates. Now in his early 30's he was having to quickly come to terms with being HIV+, something he was having issues accepting and this caused him difficulties disclosing.
Knowing he came from a small southern community I asked if he had told anyone of his family he was positive, something I have yet to do. Upon his diagnose he called his siblings and told them, "I am HIV+, I need you to go on the web tonight and learn about it because when I call you tomorrow I am going to need your support!" and hung up. He called back the next evening and when they answered the verdict was unanimous "you are not going to die!" I have to be honest, this was one of the most simple yet powerful disclosure stories I have ever heard.
March 17, 2013 - 4:30 am
We spoke some more and being the night was still felt young to us we decided to retire to LA's largest bathhouse to round out the evening. If I was going to get a reaction to the tattoo I imagined it would be at this location. Though it was late, there were still lots of people awake and looking to connect. We got a room on the ground floor and made a quick tour of this location; it had changed a bit since my last visit years earlier but the general layout remained the same, with a basement, ground floor and upstairs.
My guest had a mind to get a third to join us, so we set out on a search. There was no shortage of guys and though we made several attempts, whether being a couple was too intimidating or the tattoo worried the players or the general luck of the evening, we were unsuccessful. Neither approached nor shunned, without actually interviewing someone I couldn't say for certain what was the root issue, if any. So much for testing the tattoo at the bathhouses.
March 24, 2013 - 10:00 pm
Yet another in my series of my trips to the Korean spa with the tattoo, one guy struck up a conversation about it saying it looked like the Olympic symbol (it does have three semi concentric rings), I corrected him saying it was actually a biohazard symbol and left it at that. I was not particularly interested in informing him of my status as this was still the Korean spa and I didn't feel entirely comfortable just announcing my status randomly, sort of defeats the idea of limiting disclosure. However if he pressed me I would have willingly explained why I was wearing the tattoo as it's purpose is to promote discussion and it definitely empowers me to disclose.
March 26, 11:45 pm
Sitting in the spa at the gym before closing, just myself and another guy (seen him before never talked to him), when out of the blue he commented on the tattoo saying it looked like a gay symbol. (In fact the biohazard tatt is rainbow coloured so it serves to ID me as gay to the observant). In context this was the day of the US Supreme Court hearing the arguments regarding the Defense Of Marriage Act (DOMA) and the following day they were scheduled to hear Proposition 8 arguments and he was curious how I felt about it as well as the possible outcome. This was fascinating, as the tattoo appears to get people talking about things that are close to my heart other than just my status. This was a great and most unanticipated result.
March 30, 2013 9:00 pm
Arrived late to the Korean spa. I had problems applying the tattoo that evening; the skin seems oddly irritated but I ignored this and off to the spa I went. Only ten minutes into my visit I notice the tattoo, a thin sheet of acetate glued to my skin, was bubbling up. Argh! I pressed hard to get it to adhere and thought it would just stick ... it didn't. The temporary tattoo that I usually wore for three to five days without any issues was coming unglued. By the time I was done with my 70 minute session it had peeled up to the point that once I returned to my locker to change I needed to remove it. It appears my skin has built up an allergic reaction causing the temporary tattoo to not only bubble up but actually cause physical pain to the application site.
So no more temporary tats, the universe has spoken!
April 1, 2103 10:45 pm
In the shower at the gym the following evening, a sexy young black guy is one shower over and is clearly looking for some action. Never been one for public play but without the tattoo I felt oddly more naked than I already was ... interesting that the tattoo appears to work for me both as a shield as well as a warning.
April 6, 11:30 am
Finally I made contact with Jill Jordan, a highly respected and innovative tattoo artist! Set an appointment with her for April 14th at 1:00 pm. My gym buddy Alonso is so excited he also wants to meet Jill (he has a tattoo of his own in mind).
April 7, 2013 9:00 pm
I meet up with my first former bf David while he was visiting LA and being that he was one of the inner circle of people who knew I was poz I wasted no time telling him about my desire to get the biohazard tattoo. Why open with the tattoo? David and I have also had a very deep connection on a spiritual level and I wanted to hear him ask "what is your intention?"
I gave him my canned answer - it will make it easier to disclose, show solidarity to the HIV+ community, etc., yet I was merely buying time to really look deeper and see if I could find an even more tangible answer. This was always the way with us because of our connection and frankly it's quite refreshing to speak about life in terms of spirit and action. Oddly I rarely avail myself of such opportunities anymore ... makes me wonder why.
We had both been through some serious life events, broken relationships, health and financial issues, yet we seemed to be better off for it all. By the end of the evening I was feeling very comfortable with David again and was ready to give him a better answer with regards to my intent of getting the tattoo.
First, I wasn't branding my soul, only the body. It reminds me to be mindful of the infection but not overwhelmed by it. A few years ago I might have found such a reminder very disturbing, a constant reflection of a mistake I made and was unable to undo. But now much, like knowing I will die, I am coming to terms with it. The tattoo reminds me my life and time on this earth is precious as well as short and to embrace life at every opportunity.
Second, the tattoo is a method of communication of not just my HIV status or that I am gay (the rainbow flag has many people identifying as a gay symbol) but purely as an art form with a language all its own. I trust many will appreciate it on many levels but haters will hate and how I deal with such situations will be a measure of my own growth. Most reactions have been good and I predict that though this seems like a bold act now it will be passé in 10 years but no less important to me!
Lastly, it memorializes the freedom of my mind if not body from HIV (my spirit has always been free and I am beginning to appreciate that more and more). David applauded my intention and asked me to meditate further on this act. II told him I would and let him know what conclusions I reached.
April 10, 10:00 pm
Over the following days I considered what David and I talked about and we shared more messages over FaceBook when it dawned upon us - damn this tattoo really does get people talking. That's when it hit me this was an immerging aspect, not just to communicate to other people but to get people talking - about HIV, about gay issues, breaking down the barriers we put up in our daily lives. I am not so naïve to think this tattoo will change the world but getting people talking is a great start!
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Tuesday, 14 May 2013 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Gay Men, Research, Health, International , Sexual Health, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , Revolving Door, Guest Authors
This article by Gus Cairns first appeared on aidsmap.com here.
Data from two national sex surveys in the United States show that gay and bisexual men (men who have sex with men, MSM) reported significantly fewer sexual partners in the previous year in a survey conducted between 2006 and 2010 than they did in one conducted in 2002. This decline was consistent across most ethnicities and age groups, but was particularly marked, and statistically significant, in younger men aged under 24.
In contrast, the proportion who reported having condomless anal sex at least once in the previous year did not change between surveys. In the minority of men who also had sex with women, condom use fell markedly, but on the other hand the proportion of MSM who also had sex with women fell too.
The proportion of men who tested for HIV or for sexually transmitted infections (STIs) in the last year did not change, although the proportion who had never tested for HIV fell.
The data come from the last two National Surveys of Family Growth (NSFGs). The NSFG is a survey of 15 to 44-year-olds; participants are contacted at random by phone but due to lower contact/response rates, people under 24, black people and Hispanic people are 'oversampled', i.e. a higher proportion are initially contacted than are in the general population.
NSFGs used to be conducted every three to seven years, but in 2006 a decision was taken to conduct interviews (by voice-assisted automated computer interview) continuously. This study therefore compared figures from interviews conducted in 2002 with ones conducted in 2006 to 2010.
NSFG interviewed 4928 and 10403 men in 2002 and 2006 to 2010, respectively. Of these, 197 and 272 reported having a male sexual partner in the last year – 2.7 and 2.1% respectively (this difference was not statistically significant, p = 0.1).
The mean number of male sexual partners MSM reported in the previous year fell significantly from 2.9 to 2.3 between the two surveys (p = 0.035) and was more marked in men under 24 years old (mean 2.9 to 2.1 partners, p = 0.027). The number of partners also fell in men aged 35 to 44 from 3.0 to 2.2, though this was not quite statistically significant (p = 0.07).
The fall in the number of partners was statistically significant in men with incomes under 150% of the US federal poverty level (3.0 to 2.1) and in men living in suburban metropolitan areas (3.2 to 2.1) but not in city-centre areas (2.6 in both surveys). There were declines in partner numbers in white (3.0 to 2.5) and black (2.4 to 1.9) men, though these did not reach statistical significance. In general though, there was a consistent picture of fewer partners among most groups.
There were no changes in condom use for anal sex. In 2002, 57% of men had not used a condom the last time they had sex and in 2006 to 2010 the proportion was 58%. In the minority of men who also had sex with women, the proportion who had not used a condom the last time they had vaginal sex was 46% in 2002 but had become 67% by 2006 tp 2010, and this difference was statistically significant (p = 0.04). However, the proportion of MSM who had had female partners also decreased from 38 to 25% (p = 0.03).
One other notable difference was that fewer men reported transactional sex (sex for money or drugs) in the last year (down from 15 to 3%) and fewer men said they had injected drugs or had had sex with someone who had injected drugs (from 12 to 5%).
HIV and STI testing in the last year did not increase. In 2002 and 2006 to 2010, 41% of men said they had had an HIV test in the last year and in the case of STI check-ups 38% reported having one in 2002 and 39% in 2006 to 2010. The proportion of men who had never had an HIV test, however, fell from 25 to 15%.
The researchers comment on the fact that HIV prevalence and the incidence of STIs increased in gay men during a period when numbers of partners and some other sexual risk behaviours were falling. They note that there have been previous studies in Seattle and Peru where STI incidence and/or HIV diagnoses have remained high even though sexual risk indicators in gay men have fallen. Studies of young black gay men in the US, including one recently presented at the 20th Conference on Retroviruses and Opportunistic Infections (CROI), have consistently shown that they tend to have fewer partners despite considerably higher HIV incidence.
The researchers speculate that this may be due to 'network factors': factors about partners that are not captured by the individual risk behaviour focus of most studies. For instance, some studies have found that black gay men tend to restrict sex to partners of their own ethnicity and are also more likely to have sex with men a number of years older or younger than themselves. Both of these would tend to concentrate HIV infection within the black gay community.
Whether these are the main drivers of US black men's greater vulnerability to HIV infection, another interesting aspect of this study is that gay men appear to have taken steps that could reduce their HIV risk by using a method that has received little emphasis in HIV prevention programmes for gay men – reducing their number of partners – while not increasing condom use, which has received the most emphasis.
Leichliter JS et al. Temporal trends in sexual behaviour among men who have sex with men in the United States, 2002 to 2006-10. J Acquir Immun Defic Syndr, early online publication, DOI: 10.1097/QAI.0b013e31828e0cfc, 2013.
Tuesday, 14 May 2013 Written by // Wayne Bristow - Positive Life Categories // Hobbies, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Wayne Bristow
I think I am riding on a wave of good Karma and if that's true, I am really enjoying the ride! It's not a tsunami wave, it's a simple, gentle wave with small things happening with large rewards.
Today, I went downtown for the raising of the Pride flag at City Hall. This is the first time I've done this, and I've lived here for the better part of 32 years. I went mostly because I saw a photo opportunity - and I did get a few good ones. When I was wrapping up, I looked over my shoulder and there was a young guy watching me.
He began to tell me, "This has got to be one of the most powerful statements any city can make", pointing to the flag. There it was, flying next to the city flag and the Canadian flag. There was another flag that he thought was some sort of British flag. I felt I had to tell him it was the Ontario Provincial flag. He went on to say, what an experience it was that I could be there taking a picture of that flag, proudly flying next to all the others, only in Canada. In other countries it wouldn't be celebrated in the same way.
This whole experience made me think back to 2011 Toronto Pride, I had taken a photo of the Pride flag with the Canadian flag (see below) that I was so proud to have taken. It was seen by a writer who wanted to use it in a story he wrote. It was an honour to have it included in a story about Pride. I agreed to it right away. I have since donated a copy of it for a silent auction at a local fundraiser last year.
In a true "social media experience" I saw a link on my facebook that led me to another link for a site that one of my contacts was following called Fierté Canada Pride. Right away I noticed their profile photo, I clicked on it to see a larger version of it and sure enough, it was the same photo of the two flags. I thought about other photographers I've met who would be upset someone used their photos without permission or compensation. For me, if it's for an HIV cause or to promote Pride, then please use it. I volunteer to do all photos for my local AIDS Service Organizations for most of our events. It's a way of giving back for a lot of what they have done for me. I sent the site a private message letting them know that it was my photo and that it looked great on their site and to enjoy it.
So giving in this way is a large reward for me. Karma, what you give out, you will get back. Beautiful!
The most positive Karma experience happened about a week and a half ago. I was out taking pictures at the local University Arboretum. I had been there for an hour or so, just sitting at the picnic table trying to catch the birds flying in and away from the feeder. I noticed a few people coming through the area. I talked to a couple of them, just a hello.
Then I noticed a couple of guys. They looked around, then sat down on a bench to the right of me. They were around my age. I had this feeling that maybe I knew them as they fit the general description of a couple of guys I once chummed around with. One was a friend I had hoped to reconnect with, someone I hadn't seen in about 15 years. I had made a commitment at a recent retreat back in February to try to re-connect. I had found an old phone number, but misplaced it.
So, after about 10-15 minutes, I decided to pack up and go say hello, see if it was that old friend. I turned around to see they were on their way out of the area, so I had to hurry. I managed to catch up and I called out the friend's name. He turned around and said, "pardon me?" I said his name again and he looked at me. Then he said, "don't tell me, give me a minute". It was him, and like me, a little older a little more grey. He lives in another nearby city; we hadn't seen each other in maybe 15 years and there we were, in the least of all expected places. I go to this place so often. We tried to catch up but he was in a hurry to go somewhere, said he had an appointment, he gave me his cell number and I was to call him.
This has to be the most genuine form of Karma ever, or was it "fate"? Could they be the same thing? To move forward now I realize that I will need to do some apologizing to him. I can't go into the reason for the separation but I wasn't the person I am today. I didn't know or use empathy or compassion very well then, hell most times I can't say I had any awareness of it. I am aware that it may not be the same friendship it was before, but it could be. We can't get into the same trouble - or can we?
I spend a lot of time on the internet, but I am trying to get out more. Now that the weather is cooperating it's been easier. Photography has become a social affair; I get to meet other photographers or people asking what I'm taking pictures of and they share stories of their own. One gentleman and his wife last night suggested I join the seniors' centre, they have a photography club and I could win the photo of the week. I do qualify, you need to be 55 and over, and I am over.
So I'm trying to put a finger on what it is I'm doing and I don't see many great things. I think a lot of it is just staying positive, avoiding the negatives. If you want things to add up in life, avoid the negatives. I have seen how people treat me by the way I treat them, I do it all so differently now. I made many bad choices in my life and tasted the bad Karma on those occasions, so yes, the good Karma is working for me now.
So I'll sign off here and since Pride season is kicking off around the world, Happy Pride everyone.
Monday, 13 May 2013 Written by // Brian Finch - Founder Categories // Gay Men, Living with HIV, Sex and Sexuality , Brian Finch
What can I possibly write about online hook up sex sites that hasn't been said?
I've been off them for a couple of years since a guy I was seeing made me delete the last of the profiles I had, which was basically to stay in touch with a lot of guys I know in Europe.
The last straw for me came when this guy I was with looked at me and said, "Ya I took some GHB, didn't I put any in your drink?" I'm no prude, but since I put "NO PNP" in my profile, and the fact I've O.D'd on this stuff before, I didn't take kindly to the prospect of nonconsensual drug use.
Fortunately there was none in the drink, as I know all to well what it tastes like and its effects. It was the fact my choice could have been taken away from me that hurt.
For the last couple of years I'd rely on a couple of dwindling fuck buddies that I could call up. Slowly this was turning into a pretty sexless life.
My return to the avenue of online shopping was prompted by my trip to Tel Aviv. First the guys are super hot there; I had to meet a few. Secondly, I don't go to bars to meet people anymore, and I don't drink.
Feeling not that confident anymore, I snapped a webcam shot of myself thinking that at least if they message me it will be the most recent photo I can have. To my surprise, I learned that being "fresh meat" in Tel Aviv, even being me, means there's a lot of demand. I think over the month I got about 70 messages. I was shocked!
The problem in Tel Aviv is that everyone has their heads buried very deeply in their asses about HIV. Despite there being over 7,000 positive guys in the area, when I disclose I'm treated like I'm the first poz person they've ever encountered. I get the questions. I tell them, there are 7,000 guys here who are positive, you've fucked many of them, don't treat me like I'm the first.
Suddenly there is a concern about doing this or doing that, even though they are happy to do this or do that with those who don't disclose. This different environment that I'm used to took me back a bit. I had to decide what was the best way to do this.
It wasn't like I have having sports sex on the hour. I didn't mention it at fiirst until we were talking face to face. It's not my favourite way, but at least if someone is going to be an asshole, they can do it to my face instead of just ignoring a message I've sent.
Coming back to Canada I decided to create a couple of profiles. I've always thought there is something odd about gay Torontonians, and going back online really confirmed it.
Suddenly, (fresh-meat syndrome excluded) on the first site, there was no interest at all. Something happened to me over the course of flying those 6,000 miles back home. This site is exactly the same as it was several years ago - stale with the same 60 to 70 odd guys parked waiting for someone to message them.
The second one is marginally better as I will log on and see a few messages. In each I've said I'm positive at the end of my written portion.
I don't like the sites that force me into disclosing. I usually do anyway, but I'd like that choice. It feels like I'm being outed to be avoided. I like to have the choice on how I disclose such issues.
The lay of the land has changed quite a bit. I highly suspect the D&D free people are negative looking to bareback "safely." So in essence we have many barebacking sites even if we don't call them that.
There is a bit of dishonesty there, as they go out of their way to exclude, but can't say it's because of barebacking.
One guy I met off of this site, during our email exchange asked about my status. He's very young, in his twenties. I wrote him back and expected to hear nothing back. Instead I received a nice reply saying we could still play "safely."
What I didn't realize is our two-tiered sex reservation system. Namely, the best sex (first class) is without condoms, flying economy, you use condoms; both of these will get you to your destination, just one is more desirable. So the HIV status question can be more about determining what kind of sex is available. But it's hard to know what are someone's motives.
Perhaps with Israeli HIV-stigma fresh in my mind, I began to feel like an outsider looking in and much more so than I had ever in the past.
As per a friend's recommendation I went on a barebacking site. I never ever contemplated such sites before in my life. To my surprise I got 30 messages in a week.
Even with people condemning such an act, I did it and was surprised to see that I was no longer on the inside looking out. This is a very low stigma site. I don't use condoms with other positive guys anyway, so what the hell.
The irony is that the sites that I once scorned and judged are the very ones that I find the most affirming. Really who wants to be at a party where nobody wants you, which is how Manhunt & Gaydar etc. begin to feel like.
I've now successfully turned around my sexless life, one of my goals I can cross off of my "to do" list post-Tel Aviv.
Monday, 13 May 2013 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Arts and Entertainment, As Prevention , Movies, Gay Men, Health, Music, Treatment, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , Revolving Door, Guest Authors
Because I was possessed by a demon.
And because I was pregnant for 22 months with its child.
That's why I made 'THE KEY.'
Last week, a young friend of mine started PrEP.
He's 24 and heard about it online, has good health insurance, so has it covered. He told me the news as we were catching up after a recent sex party we were at together.
His news shocked me. And not because he started PrEP.
The shocking part was that none of his peers believed him when he told them about taking the pills to prevent HIV.
They thought he was lying.
And that's why I made 'THE KEY.'
One gay man possessed by a demon and pregnant for 22 months means there's likely to be others.
And any Queen worth his weight in taffeta and sequins knows our sacred heritage is a river of blood.
Feels like no one is hearing about PrEP. Especially gay boys in Seattle.
Most are still surprised to hear me tell of a pill that could prevent an exposure to HIV leading to a lifelong infection.
After 30+ years of exposures leading to infections, you'd think everyone who has stuck around this long in the fight against HIV would be simply gushing about PrEP, overly ecstatic about a new way for these pills that already save millions of lives to save a few thousand more.
You'd think we'd all be yawping from the roofs of the world about this possibility.
Yet every day I meet gay guys who have never heard that they could take a pill a day and keep the HIV away.
That's a FUCKING EPIC FAILURE in my book.
My young friend's friends think he's HIV-positive. All because he now has HIV meds in his possession.
Before you start your tsk-tsk-tsking, remember that a bottle of Truvada kept in a medicine cabinet attracts HIV stigma like a lightning rod.
Both Truvada and a lightning rod protect, but only Truvada has 2 really toxic side effects that make AIDS Healthcare Foundation hit the streets with pitchforks and press releases:
1) It can cause an African woman to be beaten in front of her neighbors if found in her possession.
2) It almost always leads to judgments and rejections for the rest of your living days.
We gotta work through this crap.
We are gay men rejecting gay men living with HIV.
And we do it thinking we just dodged a bullet, proud to have drummed away the damaged goods. We believe it keeps us safe.
We ALL do it. Or have done it. We do it every day. Every hour.
Every gay guy knows this crap we throw at poz guys.
This is the sour truth that makes most gay guys afraid to test.
They know firsthand the crap we throw at poz guys, the judgments and rejections for the rest of your living days.
And—suddenly--they realize they might become one of 'THEM.'
Now this crap has become a wall between us and the most powerful prevention tool we have to this day discovered.
PrEP is the first thing in 30+ years proven to lower rates of infection for the gays –-by 42% --and that was when it was used imperfectly by gay boys, and before it was known to work.
42% doesn't sound like a lot. But do the math.
Look up on Google the number of gay men/trans women newly diagnosed with HIV in your favorite city.
Multiply that number by .42.
Now stare at that number, and you'll get an idea of how many people we might have kept from a lifetime of daily pill-taking -- if we wanted to.
Hold that number in your mind's eye, and make a mantra of when it was used imperfectly.
Better yet, hold your breath and meditate on this: if we wanted to.
Do this, and you'll know why I made "'THE KEY.'
HIV is the most stigmatized disease I know.
Gay men are the most stigmatized people I know.
There's some sick poetry in this correlation between the two. It makes me hear Kurt Cobain singing:
These days, it's my theme song. My mantra.
In seven words, Nirvana captures a mindset and makes of it an epitaph to lay to rest the results of 30+ years of HIV prevention in the minds of gay men.
Miss Honey loves her Molotov cocktails, as much as she loves poppers and ass.
I ran into her Monday night on the 3rd floor of Club Z, drunk off her ass again. We both had to piss, but she was the first one to pull out her cock and write a message on the carpet:
AND GIVE ME PrEP
I pissed myself laughing. She then turned like a Queen back to her room with her cock still out and sang to all the cocksuckers:
'Smells Like Teen Spirit' is the soundtrack to my sex life, and not because I live in Seattle.
I meet guys at sex parties who freak out around any talk of HIV and assume if you bring it up that you have HIV.
I meet guys online who choose sex partners through a terse tango we all quickly learn whose dance steps have accompanying lyrics which can be sung to the melody of "Hernando's Hideaway:"
"You clean?"
"Yeah. You?"
"Yeah. Wanna fuck?"
I meet guys in bathhouses who slam meth and believe that olive oil used as lubricant will kill HIV.
I meet these guys, and I hear in my head that guitar riff that launched Kurt into the stars with barely the chance to leave behind his letter to Boddah.
I meet guys, and sometimes that riff becomes a chainsaw.
You'd think that at least all the gay guys who work in The HIV Biz would be oversharing with all their friends and fuck buddies the good news about PrEP.
You'd think at least they would be recommending it to their gay clients, supplying all the information they can find about PrEP, dreaming up ways for ALL OF US who can't afford it to access it.
With the good news about PrEP, you'd think we would at least be witnessing an orgy of activity on that mythic grassroots level.
But none of the gay guys working in The HIV Biz here in Progressive Seattle seem to care much for oversharing, let alone recommending, supplying, or dreaming.
Here's a little secret for you.
Seattle often refers to herself as Progressive.
It's the adjective she's been in An Open Relationship with for decades.
You always see them hanging together in those declarative sentences that make our Starbucks warm havens for Microsoft employees.
However, you should know that it's not really An Open Relationship.
Drop by for a drink after work at any of Seattle's gay bars, and I'll introduce you to some Queens who can tell you stories about Seattle, if you'll buy them all a drink.
Get them a little tipsy, and they can tell you tales of how she's been stepping out on Progressive with other adjectives, including --but not limited to-- Complacent, Conservative, and Racist.
And, believe me, these Queens should know.
My Candle in the Wind has blown out.
That's why I made 'The Key.'
This video originally appeared on Jake Sobo's blog "The Time For Debate is Over. The Time to Implement PrEP is Now" here.
About Magpie Suddenly:
A boy. A faggot. A poet. A singer. An actor. A director. A photographer. A high school teacher. A pot head. A baker of bread. A disease intervention specialist. A videographer. A pornographer. A cashier. A tutor. A shoe salesmen to strippers and drag queens. A sex shop clerk. A partner. An HIV advocate. An amateur sex therapist. A community liaison. A boyfriend. A chair. A trick. An assistant artistic director. A drummer. A wounded healer. A fuck buddy. A faerie. A daddy. A man.
Thursday, 09 May 2013 Written by // Olivia Kijewski Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Women, Olivia Kijewski, Lifestyle, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality
I want to talk about the sexy topic of monogamy. No so much whether monogamy is achievable or whether it goes against our natural inclinations. The internet is littered with that stuff. Is monogamy impossible? Are men designed to cheat? There are whole books dedicated to the topic: Eric Anderson's "The Monogamy Gap: Men, Love, and the Reality of Cheating" and the bestselling "Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships" by Chris Ryan and Cacilda Jetha, to name a few.
Call me cynical but you know what I get from these articles? Maybe it's not so much monogamy that's impossible, maybe its lifetime relationships. Only having sex with one person may be no problem for a period of time, but when everything that one person does begins to drive you nuts - that's the problem. Maybe we just aren't designed to be with one person our whole life, because, let's face it, people get annoying. But apparently I'm jaded…
What I actually want to talk about is monogamy assumption. Rather, I suppose I want to learn about monogamy and try to understand why it is so often assumed in (largely heterosexual ) relationships. I have been out of the dating circuit for almost a decade, so perhaps something changed while I was busy doing whatever it is one does in a monogamous relationship: taking Friday night walks through Home Depot, shopping for furniture, having scheduled sex. Maybe I have just been ill-informed by damaging television shows such as Sex and the City but I thought single people dated. A lot. I thought single people went out on multiple dates with multiple people. And not even just people who were looking for relationships; people who didn't want anything serious too, I thought they dated as well.
"In fact, based on my limited findings, it would seem that straight people at least prefer monogamy."
When I started paying attention and asking around, I realized that people do in fact date, but most people don't date multiple people at the same time. Why, you might ask? Well, the most common answer I've gotten is that people aren't comfortable sleeping with more than one person at a time. In fact, based on my limited findings, it would seem that straight people at least prefer monogamy. And since, if you're lucky, dating often leads to sex, people therefore tend to only date one person at a time.
I recognize that this little "study" is extremely limited, but I'm hard pressed to find many people who feel differently. It seems that even if people are dating multiple people, once they find someone they like, they stop dating the others. Which leaves me questioning- what if you like them all? What if you're dating multiple people and you like all of them? What if you are sleeping with all of them? What if they're sleeping with other people? What if they're assuming you're monogamous? Which leads me to my next question:
When do you have the monogamy discussion?
Is it the first date? First time you have sex? First time you say "I love you"? It seems to me, from my own experience, from my friends' experiences, and from my inevitable exposure to pop culture, that exclusitivity is assumed from the beginning- at the very latest from the first time you have sex. Where does this come from, I wonder? Is this bred into us? Is it "natural" to assume once we are having sex with someone they aren't having sex with anyone else? Are we taught this through pop culture? When did sex suddenly equal exclusivity? And furthermore, how did I miss this?
"Multiple studies suggest that monogamy is neither necessarily assumed nor the norm among gay male couples."
So, I know this rant is slightly heteronormative. I am aware of this, since I can only truly speak from my own experience and my own interpretations of the world. I recognize that this is largely different among the LGBTQ community, particularly among gay men. Multiple studies, such as The Couples Study and Hoff's survey of 566 gay male couples in the San Francisco Bay Area, suggest that monogamy is neither necessarily assumed nor the norm among gay male couples. I've been lead to believe by my gay male friends that monogamy is not assumed until discussed.
So why is it so different among straight people? The obvious answer is that they are socialized that way, whereas queer people have always had to challenge "conventional" relationships. Is the assumption of monogamy just another backwards thing we "breeders" do? Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against monogamy, I just don't want it forced on me or assumed, and I sure as hell don't want to be judged for my aversion to it or mere desire to simply date.
Dr. Kevin Russelo & Associates
Dr. Kevin Russelo + Associates has operated in the Church-Wellesley neighbourhood for the past 5 years, proudly serving the LGBT community.
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Visage Clinic - Dr. Marc DuPéré
Yesterday, only women were having cosmetic surgery and with the upmost discretion. Today it has become acceptable for not only women, but for men as well
The 519 Church Street Community Centre


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The location close to the Guggenheim, and the very spacious rooms are the best features of this hotel. The large room (Room No 222) was spacious, comfortable and efficient. The only exception to this was the very narrow tub with shower combined. The staff were less than welcoming and for this reason I would search for another hotel when visiting... More
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this has annoyed me for a while- and with firelands out now i cant keep quiet anymore- blizzard, how dare you- you give thrall a model that is standing up right but keep other orcs slumped over? what the heck? i want my orcs to stand tall, and proud! if you can give thrall a tall-standing model than i want my orc characters to be proud of who they are too!at least that would be nice since we are paying you for this game each month- and you obviously have the technology to renovate models.
edit: i posted this later - like page 5 in this topic
2 orc models: "righty" is the orc we have now, "lefty" is the same model in the game- just standing tall. and yes- this is already in the game.
edit#2: ok someone said on page 16 that this little forum does not speak for the whole mass of wow players... lets change that- call your friends, guildies, shout it out in your capitols about this post, give the link or topic name. lets settle this debate and see how many players out there in azeroth want their old models updated and now.


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My name is Janjira and I thank you for visiting my website. My passions include hula, photography, travel and the beach! I am fortunate to reside in Hawaii, which is home to some of the world's best, tropical beaches. Prized seashells, such as Sunrise and the Nii'hau Kahelelani, can be found here. Colorful, rare and unique, these shells are handcrafted into our exquisite, collectible, Hawaiian heirloom jewelry.
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exclamatio n mark?
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31-07-2011 03:22
if i send a msg to a person who isen't online so ofter, after a few weeks i get the exclamation mark on the side of my msg on the compute rwill say, but on my ipod i haven't seen a single exclamation mark. so i wonder is there any exclamation marks what ever on the ipod? or is it just showed as a sent msg?


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Using Instagram (and a particular Instagram hashtag) to help keep track of all the photos your guests take at your wedding is a fairly simple and increasingly popular way to keep tabs on your wedding photos after the big day is over. However, how do you know if an Instagram wedding is right for you? It varies from couple to couple, and there are a few pros and cons that each bride and groom need to weigh before sharing a designated hashtag with guests.
1. Everyone already Instagram. It's fairly simple to explain to your guests that you're using an Instagram hashtag for your wedding, since most of them are already on Instagram religiously.
2. You get to make one of those cute chalkboard signs telling your friends about your own special hashtag.
3. Filters. Always filters.
4. Let's get it straight, everyone loves instagram. We're totally insta-ddicted to it.
1. You might not have ownership of your photos. If you're worried about Instagram (or their parent company Facebook) taking your photos and claiming ownership over them, then think twice about asking guests to post them and read the Privacy Policy. This isn't an issue for every couple– only for those who feel strongly about owning exclusive rights to their photos.
2. It's public. While only your guests will be searching for your photos with the hashtag, when your friends post their photos that means their friends on Instagram can see the photos too. And anyone who's a jerk and feels like crashing the party can start Instagramming with your hashtag too.
3. The photos are actually really small. Downloading photos from Instagram yield photos that are only about 600 pixels wide, which means they'll be too small to print large copies in high quality.
4. Filters. Yes, this is a con too. You might be flipping through your wedding photos on Instagram the next day and realize that none of your photos are actually just plain photos of the way the day actually looked. And that might be annoying.
5. Older guests without smartphones or who aren't Instagram savvy can't participate. This means if they're taking photos on their SLR, you'll have to get photos from them separately after the wedding day.
6. It's really hard to download your photos. You have to find the photos online and then save them one by one.
7. People might not upload all the photos they capture. If you're an Instagram lover/user, you know not to flood your stream with a lot of the same photos because that might be annoying for your followers. So, your guests might upload a few photos here and there for your wedding but I bet they'll take a lot more photos that will never end up on Instagram.
So what do you think? Writing from the perspective of someone at a wedding app company, some of you are going to think I missed some pros and/or cons in the list, but I'd love to hear your own thoughts! Did you go for an Instagram wedding, or did you opt for something different? If you did end up Instagramming your wedding, what helped you make that decision?
Photos via Kim A. Thomas Blog and UnJersey Bride


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Parasite Office
Edit profileSome parasites are good. Ya, I know the definition of the word seems to point otherwise, but to put it one way, without parasites there would be no symbiotic or mutually beneficial relationships. This 'Parasite Office' by Za Bor Architects indeed exists more symbiotically than parasitically in its location. The office couples on to the blind facades of the buildings on either side, relying on them for support. What do the surrounding buildings get in return? What used to be a void, a wide break in continuity that exists only as wasted space is transformed by an entity that brings excitement and life to its surroundings.
This concept of using 'free space' is one that I hope will be prevalent in the future of architecture. It is forever being speculated that in the future, most architecture work will be renovation of existing buildings. I say this is rather pessimistic. It implies that we have filled our world with 'junk' that didn't withstand the test of time and now needs to be fixed and we can't see anything to do beyond that. What about all the empty free space that we unwittingly 'built' along with physical walls and foundations? I think we (the collective we) are creative enough to find a way to use this space. And Za Bor's new office on Kozhukhovskaya Street in Moscow is a start.
The office is constructed of a singular structural element that is clamped between its bounding 'hosts'. Perhaps part of the allure of this condition is the apparent impossibility of its execution. That being said, I really would like to know how it stands up. Does it punch in to the facades? Is there a way that its structural elements could ratchet apart, holding the new building up through friction? I don't know.
Building Activity
mulciber commentedThe architects' site indicates that this is a concept, not a completed project.about 10 months ago via OpenBuildings.com
Kiril Pavlov updated a digital reference, added 2 digital references, removed a digital reference, updated 9 media, uploaded 9 media and updatedabout 10 months ago via OpenBuildings.com


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The United States in the 1980s
edited by Peter Duignan, edited by Alvin Rabushka
Hoover Institution Press, 868 pp., $20.00
Setting National Priorities: Agenda for the 1980s
edited by Joseph A. Pechman
Brookings Institution, 563 pp., $9.95 (paper)
Human Scale
by Kirkpatrick Sale
Coward, McCann & Geoghegan, 558 pp., $15.95
The Third Wave
by Alvin Toffler
Bantam, 544 pp., $3.95 (paper)
The Microelectronics Revolution
edited by Tom Forester
MIT Press, 589 pp., $12.50 (paper)
The 1980's: Countdown to Armageddon
by Hal Lindsey
Bantam, 178 pp., $6.95
A National Agenda for the Eighties: Report of the President's Commission for a National Agenda for the Eighties
US Government Printing Office, 224 pp., $4.75 (paper)
Life After '80: Environmental Choices We Can Live With
edited by Kathleen Courrier
Brick House, 280 pp., $6.95 (paper)
Writing about the future generally takes two forms, prediction and prescription. The first is more or less prophetic: we are told what's in the cards, with warnings to get ready. There may be some choices at the margins of what is to come, but the major moving forces are already underway. Writers have always differed on those basic causes. Some emphasize technology, others an exploding population or new class configurations or an idea whose time has come. Or even the unfolding of a grand cosmic plan. "Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes…. The world is heading toward a holocaust." So predicts Hal Lindsey in The 1980's: Countdown to Armageddon. He suggests we keep our sea lanes open, bring back capital punishment, and pray that our sins be forgiven. Even if the future is immutable, we are still free to forecast what we think is coming. In that sense, each effort at prediction reflects some current mood.
The prescriptive mode is more familiar. We are told a better world is possible; it is up to us to bring it about. The time span may be modest, settling for solving specific problems in the decade that lies ahead. Thus a report commissioned by President Carter, A National Agenda for the Eighties, recommends "relocation assistance efforts designed to link people with economic opportunity, wherever that opportunity might be." Instead of trying to resuscitate "the older industrial cities," government should give "large segments of the urban lower classes" bus tickets to the Sun Belt. Other prescriptive texts take a long view, urging underlying changes in the way we lead our lives. Kirkpatrick Sale's Human Scale asks us to let our imaginations soar in the hope we see that living in small groups is better than living in large ones; he prefers to leave for later details of ways and means.
Whether predictive or prescriptive, all works about the future entertain a vision of how life should be pursued. Thus Life After '80 ("A Solar Lobby/Center for Renewable Resources Book") warns we must "re-establish man's right relation with nature," which means attuning what we do to what the earth can take. ("In this book, nature is discussed in terms of givens and social options as the variables.") And those who, like Alvin Toffler, say the future is pretty much decided imply that from our adaptations will emerge a new morality. Unfortunately these and other assumptions are not always made explicit. At issue are conceptions of the good life and the good society, phrases which for all their antediluvian flavor refer to goals that never go away. Perhaps the best place to begin is with two recent volumes proposing programs for the Eighties. One shows that there may be more to the conservative future than its proponents wish to say, whereas with the liberal vision the contrary is the case.
The Hoover Institution was set up at Stanford University in 1919 to …


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Elvis Lives The PSO's Broadway at Heinz Hall series presents Elvis Lives, the ultimate Broadway tribute to The King.03/29/2013
"Japan is the Key...": Collecting Prints and Ivories, 1900-1920 This show features over 50 rarely-seen Japanese prints, including traditional masterworks by Hiroshige Andō, Katsushika Hokusai, Utamaro Kitagawa, and Kunisada (Toyokuni III), as well as highlights from Carnegie Museum of Natural History's collection of Japanese ivory figures of people, animals, and gods.03/30/2013
Little Gem An uplifting Irish comedy about life, death, and "getting on with it" by Elaine Murphy. Party girl Amber feels a rumble in her stomach. Her compulsive mother Lorraine tries her hand at salsa dancing. And her grandmother Kay "toys" with the meaning of pleasure as she looks after her ill husband. Chock full of Dublin slang and hilarity, this play depicts three generations of middle-class, Irish women as they strive to piece together their lives over one extraordinary year.03/30/2013
Texture Contemporary Ballet There's Something About Fontina, an evening of new mixed works. Performances are Wednesday & Thursday at 7:30pm; Friday at 8pm. For tickets, ShowClix.04/03/2013
Carnegie Mellon Philharmonic Ronald Zollman conducts the Philharmonic, with the Repertory Chorus and Concert Choir prepared by Dr. Robert Page, in Anton Bruckner's Te Deum and Robert Schumann's Symphony #4. This concert will be repeated Friday at the Music Center at Strathmore, Bethesda, Maryland04/03/2013
Toi Derricotte, poet Award-winning poet Toi Derricotte will give a free public reading. Her most recent book, The Undertaker's Daughter, looks back on her childhood in an abusive home. Recipient of two Pushcart Prizes, the Paterson Poetry Prize, NEA fellowships, and Rockefeller and Guggenheim Foundation grants, Derricotte teaches at Pitt, and is co-founder of Cave Canem, a workshop and retreat for African-American poets.04/04/2013
Master of the Modern Flute A solo recital by flutist Robert Dick, whose influences range from Telemann to electronic and ambient music, jazz to Jimi Hendrix. "Jazz Times" has called him a "truly revolutionary" performer. He'll also join the Alia Musica Pittsburgh ensemble at Bricolage Saturday evening.04/04/2013
Dream of Autumn It seems a chance meeting, two former lovers in a cemetery, where the man will bury his grandmother. But nothing is as it seems, all of life, of lives, of history, is going to emerge from the dreamlike shadows as these two do battle against each other, then turn together to face the forces of the past and future. Written by one of Europe's leading playwrights, Jon Fosse's lyrical and erotic drama provides urgent testimony to the fact that our loves and lives will be the death of us all. World premiere translation by director Sarah Cameron Sunde starring Martin Giles, Karla Boos, Laurie Klatscher, and Gregory Lehane.04/04/2013
Big Band & Doowop Brass A trip down memory lane, celebrating the music of America's finest and most famous bands, with special guests Johnny Angel and The Halos! Works to include: Blue Moon, Miller Magic, a Tribute to Stan Kenton, In the Mood, April in Paris and much, much more!04/04/2013
East Meets West: A Musical Journey The Grand Halle Performance Series presents its final concert of the season, with the Greater Johnstown Community Chorus, and organist Bryan Lohr.04/05/2013
PSO Presents Mercury Soul Composer of the Year Mason Bates joins forces with musicians from the PSO, conductor Joshua Gersen, music director Benjamin Shwartz, director/designer Anne Patterson and Carnegie Mellon Drama. Using the innovations of modern stagecraft and club production, Mercury Soul re-imagines the classical music experience for a broad audience in extraordinary spaces, from clubs to warehouses to concert halls.04/05/2013
The Six Brandenburg Concertos Conductor and harpsichordist Jeannette Sorrell leads these six masterpieces in concerto grosso form, J.S. Bach's supreme achievement in instrumental music. The Brandenburg Concertos were unknown until published on the centennial of Bach's death. Ms. Sorrell is one of the leading interpreters of Bach's music and will provide insights throughout the concert.04/05/2013
Les Ballets Trockadero For more than 35 years, New York's legendary all-male dance company "Keeps on Trockin" by playfully bringing the pleasures of dance to the widest possible audience. Through its skillful parodies of ballet classics and modern dance, the Trocks' comedic brilliance lies in incorporating and exaggerating the foible, accidents and underlying congruities of serious dance.04/05/2013
QED Cooks Big Night 6-Course Dinner When: Monday, May 6, 2013 Venue: D'Imperio's Restaurant, Monroeville Time: 6pm $150 Single ticket Credit Card Only. Non-refundable. Big Night Menu: Bruschetta Crespelle 'Mbusse (Wet Crepes) Risotto Tricolore Timbale Porchetta Roast Tiramisu05/06/2013
The Tenors in Concert **SOLD OUT** When: Wednesday, June 19, 2013 Venue: Byham Theater Time: 8pm Regular $75 Single ticket $150 Pair tickets Ochestra/Director's Circle Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable06/19/2013
Chautauqua: Straight No Chaser in Concert – Overnight Bus Trip Chautauqua: Straight No Chaser in Concert – overnight bus trip Date: Saturday, June 22, 2013- Sunday, June 23, 2013 Location: Chautauqua Time: 8:15pm *Depart Saturday morning, June 22; arrive for lunch. Check into hotel and enjoy the grounds. Have dinner and see SNC in concert. On Sunday, have breakfast then leave to return to Pittsburgh. Regular $400 Single (single occupancy) $750 Pair (double occupancy) General Admission Seating Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable06/22/2013
The Divinas The Divinas in Concert Date: Thursday, September 26, 2013 Venue: QED Theater Time: 8pm Meet & Greet $90 Single ticket $180 Pair tickets General Admission Seating Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable Regular $60 Single ticket $120 Pair tickets General Admission Seating Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable Presents Deadline: Friday, June 7, 201309/26/2013
Celtic Thunder Mythology Celtic Thunder in Concert Date: Sunday, October 6, 2013 Venue: Benedum Center Time: 8pm Meet & Greet -SOLD OUT- Regular $130 Single ticket $260 Pair tickets Orchestra/Director's Circle Seating Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable Presents Deadline: Friday, June 14, 2013 10/06/2013
The Piano Guys The Piano Guys in Concert Date: Saturday, October 26, 2013 Venue: QED Theater Time: 8pm Meet & Greet $110 Single ticket $220 Pair tickets General Admission Seating Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable Regular $90 Single ticket $180 Pair tickets General Admission Seating Credit Card Only, Non-Refundable Presents Deadline: Friday, June 21, 201310/26/2013