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Rich Gossage always had the gift of gab while he was closing games for the Yankees. Now he's hoping those skills translate into written form.
The Goose was at Planet Hollywood last night signing his new book, "The Goose Is Loose." The Post talked with him about a bevy of topics, including the book, the state of relieving today, the latest Yankee juggernaut and John Rocker, the most talked-about reliever in baseball – for all the wrong reasons.
"I'd been approached 2-3 times during my career, but I didn't feel all the chapters were written," said Gossage, now 48. "I just felt it'd be the kiss of death if I did a book, a jinx. But after I retired in '94, this opportunity came up.
"I loved everywhere I played, but when you put on the pinstripes it was like playing nowhere else," said Gossage, who also pitched for the White Sox, Pirates, Padres, Cubs, Giants, Rangers, A's and Mariners. "The Yankees were very special."
Gossage, with 310 career saves, donned the pinstripes in 1978 and immediately led the American League with 27 saves and helping the Yankees successfully defend their World Series crown. His 151 saves are still second on the Bombers' all-time list, although Mariano Rivera is just 12 behind and gaining fast.
Rivera leads the AL with 10 saves this year after pitching in all three games in the recent Cleveland series, taxing by today's standards. While relievers of Gossage's era routinely pitched two or three or more innings per outing, the Goose doesn't scoff at today's comparatively pampered closers. He just admits it's a luxury he wishes he'd had.
"Mariano's the best in the game today. He's got what it takes," Gossage said. "[But] the role of a relief pitcher has changed. It's like apples and oranges. You can't compare. Today they're using the bullpen the way it should be used. They're maximizing the talent down there. But the numbers have changed. Then, 25 saves was a great season. Now guys are getting 45-50; 30s not even a great season. So the [Hall of Fame] voters have a tough job."
Gossage was always blunt as a Yank, and recounts tales in his book when that candor got him in trouble, like the clubhouse melee with Cliff Johnson that cost him much of the 1979 season and the Yanks a shot at a three-peat. And he steadfastly says Rocker should be able to make a buffoon of himself with racial slurs.
"Anyone should be able to say what you want. If you want to show the world you're a jerk, you should be able to show you're a jerk. But some [veterans] shoulda told him to shut his mouth," Gossage said. "If I'd have said that as a rookie back in '72, [then White Sox manager] Chuck Tanner woulda punched my head off.
"When you go into a hostile environment like Shea Stadium, why stir people up? It's difficult enough as it is. He had diarrhea of the mouth, and it just kept going."

subset: commoncrawl


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Finland's president has warned that the current immigration crisis poses a serious threat to Western values and has called for tougher rules to stop immigrants entering Europe simply for a better life.
Sauli Niinistö used his parliamentary address to criticise Geneva Conventions, saying they allowed too many people to claim asylum when they weren't genuinely in need.
'Migration is a serious problem,' he said at the opening of the legislature's Spring term on the 3rd February.
'Europe, Finland, the Western way of thinking and our values have all been challenged by it.'
He added: 'We must help those who are in distress or being persecuted. At the moment, however, we cannot help those who are merely seeking a better life or feel that their circumstances and future are difficult in their home countries.'
Mr Niinisto said the current Geneva Conventions on which Western states base their response to refugees were outdated and had allowed too many people to claim asylum.


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I stumbled across this lovely video today – it doesn't matter which September it was. The Northeast Kingdom of Vermont has a timeless quality that they caught very well in their short film.
Camel's Hump
You'll notice a twin-topped mountain in some of the shots. It's called Camel's Hump, and I was lucky enough to climb it with a botanist back in the 80s. The top part is rocky, and you have to do a combination of trail walking/rock climbing in some sections.
In one section, I was just putting down my boot when the botanist warned me not to step on the tree. Now we were above timber line and there weren't even any bushes around, so what was going on?
It turned out that the 2- or 3-inch-high leafy plant nestled in a rocky crack near my foot was a dwarf willow tree.
Unfortunately, I didn't have a camera with me that day. This Wikipedia image is close, though the one I saw had leaves that were more spear-like, I recall, than this specimen:
That is a full-grown tree, believe it or not.
The botanist told me that dwarf willows and other Alpine plants followed the retreating continental glaciers, greening up the land as the last Ice Age ended. After they had prepared the soil and the climate had become more hospitable, other plants moved in.
The dwarf willows and other pioneers only survived the now-intense competition for light, air and nutrients on mountain heights where nothing else could grow.
Camel's Hump now has one of the few Alpine zones left in Vermont – or did in the 1980s. I don't know how things are there now.
Categories: Meanwhile in, Random thoughts


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Wrinkles Govern Cigarette Purchases
Wrinkles, skin sags and crow's feet will be taken into account, while purchasing cigarettes through vending machines located in Japan. This is to ensure that those purchasing cigarettes are of legal age. The legal purchasing cigarettes is 20 in Japan.
The 570,000 cigarette vending machine operators are bound by the July regulation to ensure that cigarette buyers are of legal age. Keeping this in view the Fujitaka Company has evolved a system, which will take note of facial features to identify age. The customer will peep into a digital camera, which will be attached to vending machine. The facial characteristics , which include wrinkles surrounding the bone structure, the eyes and skin sags are compared to the facial characteristics information of over 100,000 people.
Facial recognition will permit the buyer to purchase. As long as there are certain facial changes, one can purchase cigarettes. These changes indicate the age of the person, that he or she is of legal age for cigarette purchasing. This would prevent minors from purchasing cigarettes with the help of a borrowed identification card.
There has been considerable decline in under age smokers in Japan. The problem of minors smoking is of much concern to anti-smoking activists and parents. Efforts to control the smoking habits of children who are not of legal age to smoke are welcome.


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Storied football programs are the stuff that Saturday's are made of, Notre Dame is certainly one of them. The tradition, the mystic, all converge to create a legacy. Notre Dame football is a tradition that has last for more than a lifetime of memories. When one thinks of the Irish, the image of greatness takes hold and the legacy lives on.
Coaches come and go with one single expectation, to win. Not just play to have a winning season, but to obtain greatness each and every year, by winning the national championship that is the true expectation. Many players have graduated and moved onto professional careers. It's Notre Dame and that's expected, nothing less would be accepted. The Notre Dame legacy lives on.


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SPOILERS: I really don't know whether I'm coming or going mood-wise. I do know I did something dangerous this morning: I listened to the Somewhere in Time theme song. This is a piece of music that will send me spiraling into a pit of obsession and depression.
Somewhere in Time, starring Christopher Reeve, Jane Seymour, Christopher Plummer, is about a play write who runs across a picture of a woman in an old hotel. He becomes obsessed with it to the point he feels that he must travel in time to meet her. He does it with a method he learns from a professor at his alma mater. There, he falls in love, but he makes a fatal error by accidentally bringing a modern penny with him. He returns to the modern day and cannot return. He dies of a broken heart.
Although there is much more to the film, this is the basis for a cult obsession with the characters, the Grand Hotel, and the method of metaphysical time travel. I'm sure that many thousands of people have attempted the time travel technique and failed.
The thing is, I feel his obsession. I feel the painful longing to be with the Seymour character. And it manifests itself in the recurring musical theme by John Barry (James Bond movies, Dance With Wolves).
When I start to get depressed, I turn to this theme and two others: the theme from the movie Carrie and theme from the movie Vertigo. I have terrible obsessive attachments to these movies and their themes.
Vertigo (Alfred Hitchcock, Jimmy Stewart, Kim Novak) is a movie about obsession with a mysterious and beautiful young woman and a con job. It ruins Jimmy Stewart's life and kills Kim Novak. Carrie is a horror story about a girl with deadly telekinetic powers. It's not a movie about obsession but I struggle with obsession with the Sissy Spacek character. I'm obsessed with the possibility that her story will not end in tragedy, but of course it does.
So the question is, why do I become obsessed, and why do I give in to it when I'm ill?
I'm groggy from medicine and gluten at the moment, so I lack clarity. I think that it is about needing to feel something strong. Those characters experience debilitating obsessive feelings; Reeve to travel back to his true love, Stewart to have the girl and unravel the mystery, and Carrie to be a normal, accepted kid.
I get obsessive about women and I am obsessed with fitting in. Why obsession with women? I might first say that I was obsessed with my wife before we married, although I no longer am. I'm obsessed with a pianist, a checkout girl at a grocery store, and numerous others. Interesting to note that I'm almost always obsessed with a pianist: 3 so far.
I don't know really. Why is anyone obsessed with a woman? It's not necessarily a sexual obsession. With Carrie, it is a protective obsession. I feel that if I could just be her father, I could protect her from herself. With Seymour it is about true love. With Novak it is about possession.
And in all 3 cases, there is a musical theme which expresses the obsession. Ack!!! My feelings here are so intense. I cry and ache when I hear them. I listen to them obsessively. I struggle to sleep with them running through my head. I know that I should stay away, but I love/hate the way they make me feel. It helps me express my obsessions. (Sigh) The more I listen, the deeper I sink into depression. I want to feel the pain of heartache in all of these films. Heartache means that I have loved deeply. It is no less important than the feeling of falling in love. They are 2 sides of the same coin, and who doesn't crave the feeling of falling in love?


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do you ever eat noodles for breakfast? we do. the kids love to eat "lucky me!" instant pancit canton or maybe chicken mami or pancit bihon from the neighborhood stall for breakfast. i'm usually the pancit-for-merienda or pancit-for-dinner person but i can also have it as morning fare.
there are many brands in the market but nothing quite hits it like the "lucky me" brand. it's so good i can have it everyday, as a side dish or sometimes as ulam. (it's sad but true, a lot of filipinos nowadays subsist on instant noodles for their ulam. it's the cheapest item around and it also goes a long way in feeding a lot of mouths). maybe to break the monotony, the noodles now come in different flavors — toyomansi, chilimansi, extra hot chili, sweet and spicy (we like mixing the original flavor with the extra hot flavor).
there's nothing like fresh noodles though, at any time of day. we had a noodle breakfast in cambodia a couple of years ago. like any good noodle, we bought in on the streets (a popular one at that, given the customer traffic on the two roadside tables). it tasted like our pancit bihon, only a little blander (but you were expected to fix it and suit your taste by putting additional fish sauce and a rather potent chili paste). as you can see from the photo, a single serving was more than hearty — a heap of rice noodles, veggies, meat, and crushed peanuts. they give you free hot tea to go with it. all in all, a good way to start the day.
(photo credit to my friend a for the cambodian noodle picture.
the "lucky me" photo was downloaded from www.mondenissin.com)


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Wrappers Delight Featuring Phay, Ygtut, Brian Brown & More
Wrappers Delight Featuring Phay, Ygtut, Brian Brown & More says
Tis the season to be jolly and full of hip-hop! December 8, 2016 Fudd, Yung Simba, The Winner's Circle & Str8OutDaDen.com celebrate the holidays early as they bring Phay & YGTUT to The Music Room in Atlanta, GA for Wrappers Delight. Also featuring Brian Brown, Sip Jackson, STLNDRMS, Jay Dot Rain, Garrott Odom & J-Coop, this show is all about giving! Hosted by Chiane Matthews & Miles Lanier. Sounds by DJGB, DJ Fye Me Up & Last Name Good. Doors open at 8pm. Show starts at 9pm. Grab your presale tickets for $5!More Less


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The Warriors and 21st-ranked Lions split their Golden State Athletic Conference doubleheader at Russ Carr Field, with the visitors taking the opener, and the hosts the seven-inning nightcap. Michael Stefanic and Michael Pollex each had three hits in the second-game victory, while Luke Coffey drove in two, and Michael Frigon added a sacrifice fly for a run. more
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I can't believe I've been so late to acknowledge that 'tis the season! And in Edinburgh it's been Christmas since the beginning of November.
It started snowing a bit yesterday and, well, I almost slipped and fell…
There are a few specific reasons for this:
- I didn't see the ice on the stairs outside my flat.
- The shoes I was wearing had no traction on ice.
- I was overly excited.
Moving on from that, it's absolutely beautiful. I was so amazed when I walked outside towards the Meadows and saw that it was blanketed in ice. I had missed the morning snowfall but I caught the one near the late afternoon and it was just so wonderful! I know it'll just get worse come January but let me bask in my ignorance for a little while.
But I think I'm going to hold off on listening to Christmas music, besides the ones forced upon us all in cafés, or else I wouldn't be able to focus on my programming final on Monday. I've been making plans with a few of my friends to go do some Christmasy stuff because I really do believe Edinburgh is gorgeous during the holidays. I'll share a photo of the Christmas market when I actually go.
If you're a student, I know that this is also the season for final exams. What a wonderful way to welcome in the holidays. But hang in there! You're almost done. Study study study and ace your exams! I don't really think I did but I'm just glad it's all over with.
You know what my favorite part about Christmas is?
Besides the cheesy music, movies and jumpers… I love giving.
I few years ago, I reached a point in my life where I stopped making lists about what I want and made ones about what I thought others wanted. I honestly haven't wanted anything for Christmas for years because, well, I just feel as if I have everything and more that I could ever need. I'm getting a good education, I have a roof over my head, I'm provided with food and water every day, and, most importantly, I have solid friendships and a loving – though sometimes dysfunctional – family. What else could I possibly need?
And so I like to put a smile on others' faces.
Not just during Christmas, of course.
Sometimes when I'm passing through a shop, I'll see something that reminds me of someone close to me and can't help but buy it for said person. I'm sure I'm not the only one who does that. I just like to let others know that I think about them. I mean, isn't that a wonderful feeling? Knowing that someone remembered some seemingly mundane detail that you've mentioned?
When I was in high school, I was a part of a community service club. Every year we would raise enough money to buy food and gifts for the less fortunate around Chula Vista. We would take trips to the shops and buy the necessities that we so often take for granted such as toiletries. And we would buy toys for the younger children. We would wrap them and everything. That was always my favorite part of the season.
That and everyone in my family putting aside their differences to have a wonderful time together.
What's your favorite part about Christmas?
On a side note: I'm not one of those owners who dresses up their dogs but I'm seriously considering buying Zeus and Riley cheesy Christmas jumpers.
Happy Holidays!
Ten more days before I get to see my family again!


text: Patient: I always have the urge to go pee. I can have a pee and then five minutes late have to go again. I get up anywhere from 4 to 8 times a night. It doesn't matter if I have nothing to drink or 50 drinks a day it's always the same. I can have a little dribble accident if I laugh or cough at the wrong time. I can also sometimes have a pee and then wash my hands and by that time sit back down and pee a little more. I've been tested for UTI recently because of abdominal pain that I have in my lower right abdomen but that came back ok and I don't have any STI's cause I was tested for those as well.There is no other pain or sign of infection.


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Here's a quick photo tutorial on achieving a basic smokey eye, using green shades that are especially flattering to redheads!
I started by using a limited-edition palette that Sephora + Pantone put out a couple years ago. I used the shade Dew but any matte, off-white or cream-colored eyeshadow will do. I like this one because it's smooth and creamy, not chalky, and fairly sheer. This makes it a perfect base. An alternative could be Makeup Geek Sand Dollar.
I start any smokey eye with the same step, every time: I use a medium-sized fluffy brush to apply MAC Soft Brown into my crease, then blend it softly upwards. I used to try to add a "blending" shade at the end, but it never worked out how I wanted it to. By applying it first, I get a much better result.
Next, I applied Stila Coco to deepen the crease. I didn't blend this one up quite as much. This starts to create that smokey effect. Before applying my lid color, I primed with NYX Jumbo Eye Pencil in Milk. It's a little sticky which was a perfect base for layering MAC Humid and Urban Decay Mildew. I used a pencil brush to put a little MAC Brun in the outer V. I highlighted with Urban Decay Polyester Bride.
The finishing touches were L'Oreal Infallible Gel Lacquer Liner in Bronze, Maybelline Colossal Chaotic Mascara in Blackest Black, and Wet n Wild Color Icon Eyebrow Pencil in Ginger Roots. I used the pencil brush again to smudge Brun on the lower lash line.
Hope you enjoyed! ❤
None of the products mentioned were sponsored or endorsed.


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27. Ann PearsonE HUGHES (JosephF) (#69) was born 30 Mar 1801.
She married George Wentworth SPENCER 2 Jan 1821.(62) (George Wentworth SPENCER is #70.) George is the son of John SPENCER and Molly CLOPTON. George became the father of Nancy Lewis SPENCER in Halifax County, 14 Feb 1822. (See George Wentworth SPENCER for the children resulting from this marriage.)
At 20 years of age Ann became the mother of Nancy Lewis SPENCER in Halifax County, 14 Feb 1822.
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"Thank You" The Oil Can of Living
Recently I have seen 2 commercials for the same company [can't remember the product – guess that wouldn't please the advertisers]. Both ads feature a conversation between 2 people that begins to go terribly wrong. In one, a woman confronts her "boyfriend" at dinner in a fancy restaurant about his fear of commitment after their long dating relationship and wants to know if he will ever propose. In the other, two women are chatting while inspecting melons in the produce aisle of the grocery store. Woman #1 asks woman #2 when the baby is due to which the second replies, "What baby?" Both the man in the first ad and Woman #1 in the second ad panic and then try to deflect the woundedness of the person to whom he/she was speaking by saying hesitantly, "……Thank You?" After a moment of real bafflement and confusion both the young woman in the restaurant and woman #2 in the grocery story become emotional – overwhelmed that someone was thanking them for something – for anything! The hurt and frustration just seconds earlier are replaced by smiles and tears of appreciation……..
The scenes are laughable, to be sure. If only it were that easy to get out of a jam when confronted or to remove one's foot from one's mouth! [Been there, done that and I never got away that easily!] For me, the ads worked in that the message was the power of gratitude and the company paying for the ad was saying "Thank You" to its customers [now if only I could remember who was thanking me and for using what product].
But there is a point to be made here, I think. We live in a "grace-less" age where people see people as objects and the graciousness of civility is being lost, let alone the ability to value one another. People are so hungry for validation and affirmation that even something as simple as a "Thank You" really can move them to tears. As this hunger goes on unfulfilled we often respond negatively – some withdraw into a self-imposed loneliness believing we are not accepted and, we think, rightly so for we are not worthy of acceptance and affirmation; others become ill-tempered and lash out at those around them. Neither response allows for health and wholeness needed for real redemptive community. So what do we do about it?
There was an old man who went around carrying an oil can, and whenever he went through a door that creaked, he would pour a little oil on the hinges. If a gate was hard to open, he oiled the latch. It seemed that it was his mission in life to take the squeak and squawk out of things, and to make it a little easier for those who came after him. People called him eccentric, of course. They said he was more than a little batty. But he went merrily on, refilling his oil can when it became empty, and oiling the hard places in life.
You know, there really are hard places in life. We come upon them unexpectedly – in fact, one or more of you reading this article is in the middle of one right now – the hinges are groaning and the latches are nearly frozen with rust. When we find ourselves, or come upon others, in a situation like that what we need is a little lubrication with what Isaiah calls in chapter 61, verse 4 the oil of joy or gladness. Take minute to read Isaiah 61:1-4 – it is the scripture Jesus read in the synagogue as his call to ministry:
"The Spirit of the Lord is upon me for He has anointed me to preach the good news to the poor; He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted; to proclaim liberty to the captives; and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord….To console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning; the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness…that He [the Lord] may be glorified."
As we come upon the season of Thanksgiving what is God calling you to be about in your relationships? For the next 24 hours try to really see the people around you – are they weary? Worn? Sad? Lonely? Isolated? Ill-tempered? Can you hear their hinges creaking or see them struggling against frozen latches? What can you do about it? What will you do about it? Maybe something as simple as….."Thank You."
…..now where did I put my oil can?


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We enjoyed the drive to Flagstaff, where we turned northward toward the Grand Canyon.
Many of the Flagstaff businesses date back to the Route 66 heyday.
We took the scenic route north, through the Kaibab National Forest.
The countryside is beautiful, but I wouldn't want to live here. Residents in this area are truly "off the grid" providing their own electrical power, and trucking in their water.
Our days travel seems to have really taken us back in time, as we stay overnight in "Bedrock", located in the small community of Valle, about 30 miles south of the Grand Canyon.


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Schedule a Tour Call Us 718.522.3930
- Chef inspired kitchens with granite countertops
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*Certain floor plans may have different features depending on when they were updated. To tour our floor plans and see what features may be available, please contact our leasing office.
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Anna's Trial Chap. 3 Parts 1 – 6 Released and uploaded.
It's finally here Please read and enjoy,Follow Me
Chapter preview:
"If you're out here all those women are going to be disappointed." I try to force a smile as I turn to look up at Ren. He stands there smoking his eyes on me.
"So I don't want to leave you feeling depressed more." He shrugs his broad shoulders as if it doesn't concern him. "Besides if I want them, all I have to do is call them unlike a certain cat who is always acting like she's on a hot tin roof." He grants me a whisk of his smile. So different from inside.
If you missed what happened in previous chapter check it out.


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Skanzen, a set on Flickr.
Last week we visited the Skanzen (open air museum) in Szentendre, just up the river from Budapest. B and I have decided we will buy or build an old mud brick house like the ones we saw here, clad it white and have a thatched roof and lots of red geraniums on the window sills. They are lovely and cool inside and each has a huge fireplace (or two!) for winter.
Note the pigs – they are Mangalica pigs that are originally Hungarian and bred for their meat. B loves Mangalica pork. I like their curly hair, personally. The one whose snout you can see in the photos had a snorty conversation with me through the fence. It went like this:
Pig: Grunt grunt
Me: Grunt
Pig: Grunt grunt snuffle
Me: Grunt, snort.
Yes, I am a proper grown up.


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The Mayor's Library
The Mayor has a library? Cool! My whole house is going to be a library one day, because books are amazing, and I want them in real life and not as an e-book. I mean can you use e-books to do this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=SKVcQnyEIT8 ? Didn't think so! I seriously want so many books that I think people might believe I was hoarding, which to be honest I'm pretty bad at throwing things away, I keep like most pieces of paper I am given, but I'm not literally a hoarder. Also, does Molching have a library, or is it too small a town, or too poor a town, to have one, or do they just think they are a waste of money? Cause if they had one Liesel would have every book (that was Nazi approved, of course) at her disposal, so I'd take a guess that they don't have a library, which all towns should, cause libraries are awesome!
Criminal activity will certainly do that to a person, you start to feel guilty and think every noise is someone coming to get you and every thought is about will someone find out, I'm basing this not on personal experience of crime, but just by doing something that 'breaks the rules' of the house/school, and that if someone found out, they probably wouldn't be happy. But paranoia can definitely set in. I'm going to guess that it was the mayor's wife who saw, based on the avoidance of her house. I don't think it would be a bad thing that she saw, she seems nice enough.
Another Quick Translation
Bürgermeister = mayor
Liesel there is no avoiding the place, and you know it! Peer pressure, it sometimes can be used to do good, not evil! And there was nothing to worry about, the woman didn't say anything or do anything unusual, so Liesel was safe, or so it seems.
A Little Something to Dampen the Euphoria
She had gotten away with nothing The mayor's wife had seen her all right. She was just waiting for the right moment.
Right moment to do what exactly? Maybe because Rudy was there? Maybe the mayor would be home soon, or was home and she didn't want anyone else to witness anything. Doesn't Liesel get tired from waking up in the middle of the night and reading for an hour, I know I would be, maybe she goes to bed reasonably early anyways?
Dun-dun-dun!! The mayor's wife wants Liesel to come inside, STRANGER DANGER! That's a bit of an overreaction but anyway children aren't just supposed to go into the homes of random people, but different times and different circumstances I guess. Ah Liesel, don't assume the worst she isn't going to burn you with the books! She wants to share her enormous stash of books, that I wish I owned, and could read German to understand them, but this is fiction! How come they have so many books? Does the wife read? Or is it to impress everyone?
I remember when I walked into an old library, containing old books, wall to wall, and I was so excited to see all the books, and I did what Liesel did and like ran over and touched them all. That is how weird I am! Though it was a public 'library' so I couldn't be loud and it wasn't even the best library in the world, just the best in my state, I must find the best in the world and visit them, any suggestions!
Liesel didn't even say thankyou! Though I guess she was a tad caught up in the moment! And then she runs back and bangs on the door, and the mayor himself answers, AWKWARD!! I bet the mayor was like what the hell was that all about, once he had closed the door!


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Buyers in competitive markets want a leg up. If their all-cash, non-contingent offer is not enough to beat out the 10 other offers, they need to go to extreme measures: a letter to the sellers.
Buyers often ask if this indirect means of communication to the seller will work. The answer is, sometimes.
When it works, it's great. But many times, the letter won't do much. Here are some points to consider if you want to write a letter to a seller.
Who is the seller?
If you love the home and want to structure the best possible offer, it's best to find out as much as you can about the seller and their situation. Knowing who you could be going into contract with should help inform you about the best way to approach them.
How do you do this? Through your agent. Ask her to inquire with the listing agent to find out who the sellers are, why they're selling, and what their motivations are. The more you know, the better off you'll be.
Some buyers go as far as Googling the seller or looking them up on social media to find a connection — any connection.
Appeal to long-time homeowners
If you're dealing with a seller with a family home, this is your best chance. Real estate is incredibly emotional. Someone who has lived in the home for many years, or an owner's child who grew up in the home, will have lots of experiences, memories and emotions tied up in the home. Any emotions they harbor about the house will influence them when reviewing offers.
Simply put, they'll want to know who the potential buyers are. They might prefer a homeowner who plans to live in the home like they did, rather than a developer or investor who may demolish the home.
Appeal to their emotions by writing a letter of introduction explaining who you are, why you love the home, and how you will carry on their legacy.
Investors: don't waste your time
If the home is a rental property and the owner has held it as an investment for that purpose, a letter probably won't do you much good. Someone who has used the property as an investment will concern themselves mainly with the bottom line. While a letter might be slightly interesting to this owner, give them a clean offer with your best price and terms out of the gate.
Connect with the seller
Simply by walking through the home, you may get a good feel for who the seller is. By looking at their art, furniture, family photos or diplomas, you can get a sense of their likes, dislikes, and interests. Don't forget, they have what you want — the home. You must do your best to try to connect with them on some level.
Connecting means taking note of who they are and then delivering them something that will hit home. I once had a buyer who loved riding horses. In the home she wanted to purchase, she noticed horse show trophies stacked in the basement, so in her letter she mentioned that she, too, rode horses. This small but important connection made the difference between her offer and another with similar price and terms.
Often the buyer needs to sell themselves to the seller, particularly in competitive situations. Know your seller, do your research and understand their motivations. Look around, take note and work closely with your agent to dig as deeply as possible.
In competitive situations and with the right seller, a direct letter to them can make a huge difference.


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Mollywood Waiting for more releases !
As the issues between the Kerala Film Exhibitors Association and the Minister for films is yet to be sort out, more and more Malayalam films are postponing their release dates. The earliest one was Mammootty's 'Venicile Vyapari' directed by Shafi, which is now shifted to the 11th of November.
The latest we hear is that Priyadharsan's new Malayalam film after six years 'Arabiyum Ottakavum P. Madhavan Nairum' with an alternate title of 'Oru Marubhoomikatha ' is also postponed, now for the 11th of this month. This means that, if the issues related to collection of two rupees service charges are sorted out, M & M will return with their films to rule the B O, which are currently inhabited by OLF (Other Language Films), by the next weekend.
The Film exhibitors association is denying the releases of any Malayalam films till their problems are sorted out. Or else they are planning to release more Hindi, Tamil and English films which will bring in limited visitors to cinema halls.


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HUEYTOWN, Alabama -- Police will continue to close off a portion of Allison-Bonnett Memorial Drive as needed as filming gets under way for the new movie "Woodlawn."
The periodic closures mostly will be done at night through Saturday in the area near Gilmore-Vines Stadium, between High School Road and East Crest Road, Hueytown Police Chief Chuck Hagler said.
There may be times when daytime closures are necessary, Hagler said, and drivers should plan for delays.
"Woodlawn" -- being shot by Birmingham filmmakers Jon and Andrew Erwin -- focuses on former Alabama Crimson Tide and Miami Dolphins football star Tony Nathan.
For more information, including the filmmakers' need for 1,000 extras for game scenes, click here.
View Birmingham-area road construction, 2014 in a larger map


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Doctor insights on:
Infant Painful Bowel Movement
5w old supplemented baby constipated 1 big bowel movement after rectal stimulation a small bowel movement with suppository 2xday Karo syrup still pain?
TRY PRUNE JUICE: Do not routinely stimulate.Give 15 ml prune juice wi15 ml water once a day.do this daily for 5-7 days until regulaand use it as needed but dont wait too long after the baby skips a bowel movement. ...Read moreSee 1 more doctor answer
Intestine (Definition)
The gastrointestinal tract starts at the mouth, travel down the tunnel (esophagus), which connects to the stomach, which then empties into the duodenum, jejunum, and ileum---the three parts of the small intestine (@25 feet). This empties into the colon or large intestine (about 5 feet), which then becomes the sigmoid colon, rectum and out the anus. So, every morsel eaten ...Read more
Is "soft" stool and frequent bowel movement common with colitis?
Not always: If you have symptoms such as bloody stools or urge to go but nothing happens, or abdominal pain, or weight loss, then I'd be more suspicious for colitis. Nevertheless it would be a good idea to get your stool tested for inflammation and infection. ...Read more
Large frequent bowel movements. Cramping before bowel movement. Is it ok? not normal for me
Need info : re what you have eaten time frame of bowel movement change any other aggravating or alleviating issues ...Read more
Lower and upper abdominal cramps, frequent bowel movements, 6 or more bowel movements a day, tannish color soft stool but anus fissure. What is this?
Irritable bowel?: In people who otherwise are outwardly healthy, by far the main cause of such symptoms is irritable bowel syndrome. However, several other kinds of intestinal disorders also are possible. You'll need in-person evaluation to know. Good luck! ...Read more
Bowel movement troubles since birth. No regular bowel movement. Sharp stomach pains when move bowels. Noticed 2-3 bloodclots tonight 10c size. Help?!
See a doc: With rectal bleeding and pain you need to be evaluated. Most sources of rectal bleeding are benign (hemorrhoids) but occasionally the source is more worrisome. ...Read more
My bowel movement is slow. Stool are not very hard. I have always feeling of incomplete bowel movement. Also prostate burning after bowel movement.
Here are some...: With all what you have gone through as reported in your profile, what you experienced may be what you are going to have and live since you already have received the most common and effective treatment. Constantly feeling something inside rectum may be related with inflammatory change of prostate. Empirically, it's worthwhile to try 500 mg Ceftriaxone + 1 gm azithromycin and see. ...Read more
Excrutiating pain during bowel movement with hemorrhoid.. Any advice? Enema? Laxative?
Fissure: Could be an anal fissure. Soft stools without straining. There is topical medication that may help so call your doctor. ...Read moreSee 2 more doctor answers
Can gas bowel movement cause labor like contractions?
Pelvic pain: Yes. Sometimes gas trapped inside the abdomen can cause severe pain, sometimes refered as being on labor. ...Read more
What causes burning anus after a normal soft bowel movement?
Hemorroids/fissure;: Following conditions may cause burning in anus 1hemorroids 2anal fissure 3proctitis 4eating spicy hot food 5cancer of rectum/anus so i will recommend get it checked. ...Read more
Would diverticulitis cause anal pain during bowel movements?
Prob not: Probably not. Usually pain with a bowel movement is the result of either an anal fissure or external hemorrhoid. Neither one is dangerous and both are easily treated. Diverticulitis will usually give a patient fever and abdominal pain. The pain is more constant in nature. How long have you had this pain and is there any bleeding associated with the bm? ...Read moreSee 1 more doctor answer
How often should a breastfed + formula supplemented baby have a bowel movement? Bowel movement forced by rectal exam after 36 hours of last stool.
BM and baby: Babies poop at very different intervals. GENERALLY breast fed babies poop more frequently than formula fed/supplemented babies. If you child is not in any distress I would NOT be doing rectal probing to force a BM. Only a trained physician should perform this as serious injury can occur to your child. Expect breast fed baby to poop 3-6 times a day and formula fed baby maybe 2-3 a day on ave. ...Read more
Pale stool, not every time, frequent bowel movements daily?
R/O IBS: IBS IS SX OF EXCLUSION.. You need a full exam and blood work. Especially screen for H pylori . Also stool screen x 3 for occult blood /parasite/hpylori . you also need a baseline colonoscopy. While you are getting these items checked out you should stick to a gluten free high fiber diet . Ie gutbliss.com and Wholeapproach.com. Also 64-80oz water ...Read moreSee 1 more doctor answer
Powdery bowel movement?
Impossible: Resend this with the proper adjective.Get a more detailed answer ›
Colon cancer with hypoactive bowel sounds, distended abdomen, hypoactive bowel sounds, no bowel movement 2 days?
Call your Dr now: Hopefully this is transient, but the description provided is concerning for bowel obstruciton which can in turn lead to serious complications. ...Read moreSee 2 more doctor answers
Does colon cancer cause painful bowel movements?
Can if: It is a rectal cancer usually. Actual colon cancers may cause a change in your bowel movement with no pain unless the pain is from constipation or diarrhea due to the tumor. But rectal cancers or anal cancers can indeed cause pain during and after the evacuation. ...Read more
Lower left side discomfort. Bowel movements quite a bit with soft stool. Slight vomitting.
Hard to say: I would entertain an issue with ribs, skin, lungs, gall bladder, stomach, intestines, ovaries, urinary tract or kidney. As it turns out, the best answer would be to be evaluated in person to give you the best diagnosis. Please see your doctor as soon as possible. ...Read more
Can my vagina prolapse during large bowel movement with straining?
Yes: Keeping stools soft is important factor in avoiding prolapse, the size of stool not so much as the hardness/straining. ...Read more
Very often abdominal pain; constipation / diarrhea (bowel habits change/alternate); pain gets better after bowel movement.
Help ! Its been 2-3 months?
Belly pain: It sounds like you have IBS. Pain after defecation is a classic sign of IBS. However this is a diagnosis of exclusion. You should get a colonoscopy and EGD to evaluate if you have celiac disease, a motility gut issue, a lactulose absorbption issues, or IBD. If all this is negative then one can firmly say you have IBS. ...Read more
Does hemorroids stop bowel movement?
They shouldn't: Cause a bowel obstruction. However, severe constipation may contribute to hemorrhoids and may prevent bowel movements. ...Read more
Would diverticulitis cause pain during bowel movements?
It can: It depends on the location of the pain; typical might be left lower abdomen or pelvic, associated with the sigmoid colon inflammation. If you are having fevers or all-over abdominal pain, or signs of infection you should see your doctor; consider taking a daily fiber supplement. ...Read more
Painful Bowel Movements (Definition)
Having pain while engaged in normal bodily funstions is not normal. Pain may be due to hemeriod that are inflamed , fistulas , fissures, tumors, or ...Read more
Bowel (Definition)
The bowel is the intestinal tract in the body. The small intestine ...Read more
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- Blood in stool painful bowel movement
- Painful cramping before bowel movement
- Talk to a pediatrician online


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Back before I decided to take a break from blogging, we had a birthday party for our oldest son. He turned six. Six!! That's nearly 10, which is nearly 18, which means he'll be in college before I know it.
I love making a big deal over our kids' birthday parties. I have (almost) always made their cakes. Amongst them have been a Bob the Builder construction site (complete with crushed oreos for dirt), a Spongebob pineapple house, a pirate ship, Gotham City, and now a soccer field.
In a post back in March, I mentioned that my friend Jacqueline took some awesome (AWESOME!!) pictures at the party. Here's a very small sampling of my favorites. Seriously, everything she took was amazing. It was hard to limit the pictures for this post. Having said that, I apologize for this picture dump. I hope you don't mind!
The cake.
Balloons are always the best part.
Quite possibly the worst (looking) cupcakes.
The birthday boy.
I love this one. This is serious bubble play, folks.
People always ask us if the boys are twins. They're not, but the older they get the more they look alike!
Child modeling, anyone? :P
She gets her fashion sense from me.
Pretty, pretty princess. (just joking, she's one tough cookie) But, raise your hand if you remember that game!
Cheese face!
Birthday boy.
Pinata time!
Cake time!
I love this shot.
Present time! ... I guess I was mistaken in saying the balloons are the best part. :P
I really wanted Jacqueline to take a family portrait while she was at the party, because almost all of our family portraits are taken during Christmas time. This is a nice change from the our usual picture outfit color scheme.
Isabelle, Will, Liam, Me, and Ethan
Thanks for taking a look at our birthday pictures. Jacqueline did such an amazing job! I can't wait to have her at Ethan's party in June, which is going to be an Angry Birds theme. She has an eye for what makes a beautiful photograph.
Make sure to check out her photography blog! She has a lot of pictures up of her travels and from when she lived in Thailand.


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Dr. Gwendolyn Grant and Dr. Steven Malcolm Bowers, both physicians at Yale-New Haven Hospital, were married yesterday. The Rev. Dr. Lowell Ballinger, a Presbyterian minister, performed the ceremony at the Old Parish Church in Weston, Vt.
The bride, 33, is a resident in internal medicine. She graduated from Amherst College and the Yale School of Medicine. She is a daughter of Jenifer Grant of New Haven and Dr. John P. Grant Jr. of New York.
The bridegroom, 35, is an attending physician in the emergency department. He graduated from Williams College and received his M.D. from Yale. He is a son of Rebecca Sloan of Pearl River, N.Y., and Dr. Malcolm Bowers of New Haven.Continue reading the main story


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When the writing is on the wall…
I always thought graffiti was a modern day curse – but no, it's been around for years but we just hadn't spotted it! Apart from the surprise of discovering so much of it in our ancient churches, it is also fascinating as it is the 'voice of the people' – it's not the expensively carved monument of the landed gentry, it is often the only record of 'ordinary' people, many of them children, who lived and died and completely disappeared.
A project to record the graffiti, which began in Norfolk churches, is gradually spreading across England. Medieval graffiti of pentagrams, crosses, ships and 'demon traps' have given historians a fascinating glimpse into England's past. Armed with just a torch and a camera, a team of volunteers has recorded more than 28,000 images from churches in Norfolk alone! Although the graffiti discovered so far offers an insight into the minds of some (possibly bored!) churchgoers in the Middle Ages, the meaning of the scratched images is not always clear.
However, other graffiti is easier to interpret. Heart-breaking graffiti uncovered in a Cambridgeshire church has revealed how three sisters from one family died in a plague outbreak in 1515. The names Cateryn, Jane and Amee Maddyngley and the date were carefully inscribed on stonework in Kingston parish church.
The graffiti project had shown that church plague graffiti was far more common than previously realised. The Maddyngley family lived in Kingston, seven miles from Cambridge, and were tenant farmers who, in the way of things, would rarely turn up in parish records.
Archaeologists believe Cateryn, Jane and Amee must have been children because their names are not found as adults in any of the records. The Maddyngleys had lived in Kingston since at least 1279. In 1515, there was an outbreak of bubonic plague in London which spread across south east England.
In times of plague, children were particularly hard-hit and usually hastily buried in unmarked graves, their little lives lost forever. The carving of the sisters' names, who archaeologists believe died in the plague outbreak, has created a lasting memorial to them.
The project has confirmed more graffiti was created during times of pestilence such as the Black Death of 1349 and subsequent outbreaks of plague. Was it a way of remembering the dead, or commending them to God, or what? One can only imagine what it must have been like in those far off dark days to lose your children and have no memorial to them. I know lives were shorter and children often died through all sorts of 'natural' causes, but I found the image of a heartbroken father standing there and diligently scratching his dead daughters names and the date they died into the fabric of the church deeply touching.


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Enlightened Age Entertainment
Just how much postage will it decide to try mail a ocean turtle to some TV network? The couple of fans of Enlightened could get that reference, and since you will find so very, very couple of people, Cinemax introduced yesterday it had become eliminating the brilliant spiritual-dark-comedy series after two seasons, probably putting it beyond the aid of any mail-in Save Our Show campaign.
It isn't exactly a stunner that the network would cancel a motion picture with Enlightened's rankings, that have been within the low six figures because of its first-run showings, tiny even by pay-cable standards. What's more rare, honestly, would be that the show would obtain a second season to start with, being an acknowledgement of the items an excellent factor Laura Dern and Mike Whitened produced: a poetic story of private growth, serious yet shot finished unflinching humor. More rare is still that the acclaimed, low-ranked show would obtain a fitting ending Whitened, no stranger towards the cold details of rankings, ended the nigh-perfect second season solving Amy Jellicoe's story of coming the whistle on her behalf corporate employer.
So for Enlightened fans, this really is sad, but it's sadness with closure, which within the TV business counts as something of the win. But has Cinemax lost something here, in the status like a network that–within the bounds of the for-profit business–makes great implies that nobody else will, and keeps them alive simply because they deserve it?
Not here–not yet. In the end, Cinemax did make Enlightened, and cure might have, a smaller amount designed a second season? The network released a pained statement around the cancellation, and call me naive but getting adopted the network for a long time I've pointless to think it insincere: "It would be a very hard decision. We've made the decision to not continue Enlightened for any third season. We're happy with the show so we anticipate dealing with Mike Whitened and Laura Dern later on."
(Disclosure: Cinemax is TIME's sister company over time Warner, although the companies be separated underneath the the Time Corporation. spinoff offer process.)
Cinemax takes chances on art, however with limits. It restored the reduced-ranked Luck–which needed to cost you a good little more than Enlightened to make–though the racetrack drama's second season wound up dying and among its horses inside a production problem. It's keeping Treme alive for just one last, reduced season.
If there's a unique difference here, it's that Cinemax rarely cancels shows in the peak of the acclaim. (The murky story behind the finish of Deadwood notwithstanding.) Shows like Bored to Dying, Hung or Steps to make It in the usa had their fans, however their reception was mixed at the best. I can't imagine Enlightened not presents itself my favorite-of-2013 list, and that i wager it will likely be on many more. And it is not only experts much like me: its fanbase is small but noisy, also it will get hosannas within Hollywood.
Cinemax, however, appears to possess made the decision as Amy's practical mother Helen may have stated to her: good reviews won't place a roof over your mind. Now, Cinemax has lengthy needed to balance its commercial hits using its labors of affection. Also it could reasonably express it designed a creative decision here too: that Whitened gave the show an enjoyable ending also it had told its story. That's defensible, if disappointing.


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This is another of my favourite songs.
It is the second single by the Finnish band Nightwish. This group was born in 1996 when friends of Tuomas Holopainen (Tarja Turunen –the vocalist-, Erno Vuorinen and Jukka Nevalainen), grouped together as an acoustic project. They got known in Finland by the recording of a CD with 7 demo songs, which turned into a best seller. Since then, the band has become one of the most popular bands in Finland.
But in 2005, Tarja, the vocalist, was ejected from the band because she recognised that she didn't get on well with the others. The Nightwish Fans got very annoyed because they thought that Tarja's voice couldn't be replaced. But in May 2007, they introduced the new vocalist: Swedish Annett Olzon.
The first recorded CD with her voice was "Dark Passion Day". "Eva" was the first single from that CD, but I think that "Amaranth" is the best song in it.
This is the cover of the Amaranth's single:
And this is the cover of the "Dark Passion Play" CD:
This song is based on a picture by Hugo Simberg: 'The Wounded Angel' ('Haavoittunut enkeli' in Finnish), which is about a wounded angel who has fallen near a river and is found by a couple of fishermen fishing in the river. They want to help the angel so they put up a wooden stretcher and carry it through the countryside and farm lands. This scene is observed by all the people the fishermen pass by. They reach their house and try to cure the angel but something happens and, suddenly, a fire breaks out outside the house but the angel comes out of the house as if it were a miracle. Interspersed with the story, in the video, we can see scenes of the band playing the song.
This song got to the top of the charts in Finland (obviously), the United Kingdom, Hungary and Spain. In Sweden and Denmark, for instance, they reached the fourth position.
As this band makes Symphonic Metal music, I would only recommend it to people who like this kind of music, but even if you don't, I'd recommend it too, because I think you'll like it.
In my case, I don't really like metal music at all, but I f ell in love with that song the first time I listened to it.
What do you think of it?


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TRS will decide on 27nth
Jithendar Reddy the TRS MP earlier made an announcement that the TRS would support NDA candidate for the Presidents posts. But KCR the party chief clarified that it is not correct and not official.
The TRS, he said, would only decide on Saturday, May 27, who it would support for President, hinting that the BJP chief would do well to "realise his mistake and make amends."KCR has called a meeting of the MPs and MLAs at Telangana Bhavan to chalk out the future course of action for the party.
The NDA is a little short of the 51 per cent it needs in the electoral college that elects the President and hopes for support from regional parties like the TRS, YSR Congress, AIADMK and the Biju Janata Dal, which together have about 12 per cent.
Jaganmohan Reddy of the YSR Congress has already pledged support to the NDA, while Tamil Nadu Chief Minister E Palaniswami met Prime Minister Narendra Modi on Wednesday and is believed to have discussed the presidential election to be held in July, when President Pranab Mukherjee's term ends.
Opposition parties are meeting on Friday in Delhi at the invitation of Congress president Sonia Gandhi to decide on a joint candidate to take on the NDA's nominee.
On the other hand in his tour of Telangana, Amit Shah, on a mission to expand the BJP's footprint in states where it has limited presence, did not visit the chief minister's constituency or any TRS stronghold.
He spent two days in Nalgonda, that is the bastion of the Congress and Left. On the third day he held a polling booth committee meeting in Hyderabad, which has been won by Asaduddin Owaisi's All India Majlis-e-Ittehadul Muslimeen (AIMIM) for the last 33 years, since 1984.
MIM chief Asaduddin on the other hand challenged Amit Shah to contest from Hyderabad if he had guts. The people are with MIM he opined.


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Hi all I've gone anon for this as I'm a regular users here .We were out yesterday doing some shopping and my husband was constantly on his phone as we were walking through the shopping centre, walking up and down the aisles in the supermarket, just.phone never out of his hands. He always has the phone stuck to him anyway, but it really annoyed me yesterday and I told him, for god's sake, put that phone away while we are all out and I was told, f*** off you c*** . I'm just distraught and I just can't look or communicate with him . I've told him to apologize to me and he just blankly stared at me. He's always on his phone, news sites. Boards, Facebook, Amazon, you name it he's on it. . It's got to a stage now where I'm so upset I don't know what to do. Kids are young, 2 & 4 . .
ah I feel so sad for you sadme as this has really upset you. As it would me. There is nothing worse than being put down like that, especially with such a horrible word. Really unacceptable to my mind. Like totally. However 'cross' or annoyed he might be it just shows a lack of respect for you as a woman. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I too would be extremely hurt. Only you know your husband, and how best to get him to understand how you're feeling. If he cant understand how upset you are, I dont know how you will get over it to be honest. He needs to make amends. As for the phone addiction, he needs to face up to it obviously, but will he. I'm sorry you're in this awful situation. You probably feel powerless. I hope your husband does really love you and will 'come around'. And own his behaviour. Keep posting for support, hugs, X
Post Deleted Because: The OP deleted this post
Oh Darcy would you give over. So its okay for a woman to speak to a man any way she likes but its not okay for him to retaliate? That is basically what you're saying.
Speaking to someone respectfully goes both ways and is not reliant on gender. You and others keep saying it doesn't matter how the OP spoke to her husband, but it does matter.
As for your father and brothers - they're in the habit of thumping people are they?
When DH and I rowed each of us could give as good as we got. My family would be the type who would not interfere, and they would also know that I am well able to fight my own battles and would not thank them for their interference.
Maybe she does need to address how she she asks him to do something but that still does not excuse what he said to her ..EVER. Can you hand on heart tell me your husband would tell you in front of your father or brothers or any other man to F**k off you C**t? I would bet my house on it he wouldn't and I would bet my house on it you wouldn't stand for him telling you to do it either. My reason for saying he wouldn't do it in front of another man is because he knows he would probably get a thump from them for speaking to a woman like that. So it's not ok for a man to do it just because it was just his wife. It's a disgusting thing to say to any woman let alone your wife and mother of your children. It lacks respect and and any trace of being half of a man with any sense of common decency.
Undoubtedly he was out of order! Regardless of the tone you set with himi bet it was out of sheer frustration he has no business humiliating and insulting you like this. Also you should seriously address the phone issue, he should be able to participate in daily activities without being glued to his phone. This is actually a huge problem with relationships today. As for people excusing how he spoke to his wife, imagine being married to a man and his phone or vice versa. This itself is a big problem.Hope you feel better today and I hope your oh has apologized, if he has not he's an absolute moron!
Maybe address how you speak to your husband in future as well.
Much as you don't want to hear it, and many posters wish to ignore it, there are two sides to this, and if this was out of character for your DH, then you clearly hit a nerve with him as well.
Thanks everyone for your replies. No my husband wouldn't normally speak like this, he has on occasion before told me to f*** off if there was a heated moment with the kids, but that would be quite rare. He just went to work this morning and said nothing g, I was just getting up with kids. And I won't hear from him until he comes in at 6this eve. I'm going to address the phone usage with him, but I know this is going to end up in a row , I don't feel any better this morning as I keep thinking of the way he looked at me when he said it. . This has made very fragile . Thanks you so much for all your replies. .
100% agree smurfette.
Have to say any man who calls a woman that word is just an excuse for a man. It's disgusting and there is no excuse for it. Hope you are doing ok this morning OP. I would be exactly the same as you, I would be devastated if my dh said that to me. It's not something I would be able to forgive easily. The phone thing is another problem altogether but your dh needs to learn to respect his wife. I wonder would he have told you to do the same if your father or brothers had been around.. I doubt it very much.
Buttymum it was a poster I was calling Ike not the husband who cursed
Op i hope you feel better this morning. Im sort of with buttymum on this. My oh and i have both snapped snd called each pther names in the heat of anger once or twice. Not good but we are human and snap under pressure sometimes. I dont know of its ttue of all men but my oh finds it very hard to apologise for anything and holding out for one only makes him more defensive of whatever caused the anger. So what worked for me in those situations was separating the issues when we sat down to discuss it later like buttymum says and explaining the frustration whatever the 'bigger' issue causes. I find that if i can get him to see there was a problem with whatever was going on that i was nagging about then he is more willing to apologise for snapping at me for being on at him. Does that make any sense?So i think you need to sit down, talk about his phone use - again - and the fears you have for how it affects the children, the frustration it causes you and this is why you were on at him about it. Hopefully he will su gest cutting back again and apologise. We also make a 'plan B' if we are trying to solve a problem in our relationship (im not in anyway suggesting YOU are the problem here but i find a shared approach works best), for what will do if the person trying to stop a behaviour forgets or acts the same again. So you could consider asking your OH to suggest what you could say to remind him about putting away the phone if he is overusing it in the future. If its his suggestion then he cant get angry about it. I really hope he talks to you tonight and sort things out and feel better soon in the run up to Christmas. But the main thing, for me, would be to address the underlying problem of the phone first cause thats the bigger issue and the cause of the horrible name calling.
I hate the way people assume others have loose morals or were dragged up because we aren't distraught or offended at a word. No one is condoning what he said and he must apologize there is no question there but the OP needs to accept the role she played. She snapped first. There is something very irritating about someone who snaps first, then is offended and upset when the other person Reacts badly. Chastising her husband in public was never going to go well was it?? No adult takes kindly to being told what to do by their partner. His phone sounds like it's a big issue and his use of it is out of control.
Missbumble don't talk through your arse, it makes you look stupid. You have no idea how anyone communicates with me, or my expectations of same.
From what I can see, I have much more realistic expectations of human behaviour, and obviously a thicker skin then most of the posters here.
If I snap at someone because I'm irritated, I don't then get "distraught" when they turn around and retaliate. Especially if I snapped at them first.
Ever heard the staying "sticks and stones?"
I feel sorry for sekhmet that her expectations are so low when it comes to how her oh communicates with her. People are human,we all get stressed,annoyed,angry,we snap and have meltdowns but calling someone a c*nt is lacking basic manners whether its a friend or oh youre speaking to.
Both issues would upset me, the phone would drive me crazy, (so sad the way you described the way he would read a story to the kids with one eye on the phone) and using that word would hurt and disgust me. If my husnand was glued to the phone like that and especially when out and about with the children, I can tell you I wouldn't bother with pleasantries while telling him to get off it and I still wouldn't expect to be called that vile name. But you are not 'a piece of dirt' because he chose to use that term, he has just let himself down. Someone said people are treating their ohs like their children, well being on the phone all the time is like what my teenager wants to do, I expect more from my fully adult husband but if he wants to act like a teenager, I wouldn't be long telling him so or visa versa.
Ah here scramble calling him ike Turner is a million steps to far and not helpful to op who is already wound up.Everybody has rows it's how you resolve them that matters, not who came out on top
It's a horrible no class word and is unacceptable.What you are experiencing is a battle of wills. You want him to engage more with the family and his wanting his addiction ie phone. It reached fever pitch because his addiction was directly affecting his ability to deal with the two year old and it was obvious. Don't underestimate how annoying it is for a man to be 'told' to put his phone away. Is he right of course not but it's his instinct to fight back kicked in.If you focus on the name calling, his addiction is being forgotten. You need to pick your battle here. Explain to him that seeing him on the phone again brought out the anger in you because this is a constant 24/7 issue and not a one off. Likewise his name calling is a single issue at the moment. Park it for now and concentrate on getting him to put his goddam phone down. Personally I hate serious name calling but it has happened in my house, rarely but at the same time it's a shocker and we know there is a real anger behind it and that needs to be dealt with. Demanding an apology while justified is only making him defend his sense of pride and ye are both digging a useless hole for yourselves. Focus on the phone and explain clearly how exasperated you are and that you feel your kids are loosing out. Ask him, don't tell him to set boundaries for phone time. Don't go in all guns blazing . Maybe then an apology will flow from the heart which is worth far more
The OP admits she was already irritated and she took a tone with her husband - and he snapped back.
What did she expect? A meek little "sorry dear?" She "barked" first.
And then she comes on here to have a moan about it and has people like you telling her he is abusing her?
Cope the hell on to yourselves, really.
If a poster told you shut up you c**t I'm sure you'd just chuckle.Sorry Ike Turner but some of us have respect for fellow human beings and a barometer for behaviour we don't like to plunge below.If spousal abuse is acceptable in your personal code of behaviour well thats your prerogative.I am worth more than being a verbal punchbag to be barked at however my husband would see fit, depending on his mood.I am a role model for my children.I won't be censoring myself or filtering my feeling or opinions in case poor daddy gets upset or tip toeing around anyone.
Oh jesus! Talk about making mountains out of molehills!
Sadme, please pay no attention to posters telling you to get over it or questioning if you did anything to warrant it . Your husband used a derogatory term , I'm not insinuating that he is abusive but verbal insults / name calling is generally the first sign of abuse . You need to set the standard for how you will allow yourself to be treated. Speak with your husband, explain to him that the term he used was derogatory and insulting . Be firm. Tell him you expect a sincere apology and for that word or any other insult / derogatory term never to be used again . You are not to blame for his choice to degrade you verbally.
At least 4 of the following signs and symptoms are thought to comprise criteria for cell phone addiction, and the problematic cell phone overuse must cause significant harm in the individual s life:A need to use the cell phone more and more often in order to achieve the same desired effect.Persistent failed attempts to use cell phone less often.Preoccupation with smartphone use.Turns to cell phone when experiencing unwanted feelings such as anxiety or depression.Excessive use characterized by loss of sense of time.Has put a relationship or job at risk due to excessive cell phone use.Tolerance.Need for newest cell phone, more applications, or increased use.Withdrawal, when cell phone or network is unreachable.Anger.Tension.Depression.Irritability.RestlessnessI think they're are two seperate issues here.Number one is your husband's phone addiction.I would call it an addiction judging by your description.The second issue is the massive godamned apology he owes you.I am literally disgusted that anyone could try and rationalise or justify him speaking to you like that-you his life partner who has had two children with him and whom he shared a bed and home with.It's completely unacceptable and you tell him that in no uncertain terms.No one deserves to be spoken to like that.I'm very sorry for you to be going through this Christmas week and send you a virtual big :)
My husband has never spoken to me like this but I can relate to the phone thing.He is NEVER off it and it places a massive strain on our relationship.None of it is work related,it's all Facebook/Boards/DoneDeal etc The kids aautomatically associate daddy with his phone.If we are out for a family meal or day trip the phone is too.Reading the kids a story/playing a board game/whatever it's one eye on the phone.It's actually reaching addiction level and I intend on seriously tackling this in the new year.
Thanks everyone. . I'm off to bed now. And Im Just so sad and feeling like a piece of dirt . . My husband knows I absolutely hate, hate that word so it's just made me feel a lot worse than if he had just called me a b**ch or something else. . Thanks all x
i would not be happy if my dh called me that word he needs to grow up and spend some with his family wihout the phone his not 12 years of age
I didn't turn around and.call my husband a b****cks or use any language, I told.him to get off his phone
I didn't shout. .
I know for a fact he won't apologize . .I've hardly spoken to.him.today, I took the kids off for the day. No the kids didn't hear as they were playing with some toys in tesco and I just walked over to him when I saw him.on phone as I.was with my daughter and my son (2) had moved away from my husband and this is when I said it to him. I'm so saddened to think he used this despicable word on me. .
I actually think its wrong to treat or speak to your partner as if they are another one of your children - and in a lot of the rows posted about here that is exactly what I see.
The OP may have been annoyed, but that did not give her the right to shout at or snap at her DH.
If she does that, she can expect to be spoken back too in the same manner.
The word used is just that, a word. Build a bridge and get over it.
Hate that word &would be hurt & sad if my dh said it to me. Ask him if he thought you raised your voice to him. If he says yes apologise then if he doesn't apologise to you demand an apology & an understanding when out as family he doesn't use phone. Immature behaviour from him.
The way he treated you was unacceptable. What really annoys me is that other posters are questioning your attitude, your tone etc. This simply takes the responsibility for his behaviour off him and places it on you. Disgusting way to treat your partner. Could other people hear him? Did the kids hear him?
That's an absolute rotten word to use on anyone, but not a mind a loved one. Why the hell should OP apologise? He should own up quickly and admit he was totally wrong and disrespectful when using That word.
I just hate that word and I just filled up with tears as he said it, and I'm now doing the same. . It's a despicable word.
I hate that word and would be really hurt if DH used it no matter how much he felt I was nagging.
As to always bein on the phone, he needs to cop on and pull his weight.
Thanks everyone, yes we.addressed his constant use of his phone on numerous occasions and he admitted he spends too much time on it . .So he said he was going to cut back, so roll on a few weeks ago, my daughter asked daddy to read her a story and he's reading a story to her, with his eye on his phone in his other hand. On this occasion i just walked over to him, took the phone from him and put it on the table . .No words said. .And no, I will not apologize as was suggested, sure why come go out at all, why not just sit at home on your computer/phone. .My children know no different, the first thing my son says to his daddy when he gets in from work is, phone daddy phone.daddy. . He treated himself last week to an i watch. . So while he's in the bathroom tonight with the kids brushing their teeth he's sitting on the toilet on his watch . . .
I'd be fuming if my husband called me that, no excuse for it, you had every right to shout at him or moan at him for being in the phone, my husband finds it hard to leave his work behind and when out he often rings work or they ring him, all I have to do is give him a look and he puts it away, my kids aren't as young as yours so don't need as much supervision but if he's out with us he's out with us and that's that. I'd expect him to grovel for that. You need to sort this out promptly.
So maybe you should apologise for your tone?
Just stand your ground on this.
Thats a question you need to ask your husband.
My point was if you barked at him and I'm assuming you did I'm not surprised his response wasnt ideal.
I dont think your wrong for asking or expecting him to be present and not on his phone but if you delivered that in a less than nice way his comment was probably in response to that.
Sorry you are upset Sadme..I would be too. Take the rude name calling aside....his obsession for wont if a better word sounds like it has been bothering you for a while. If this is the case,when you are feeling calmer I would bring up that matter for discussion with him....personally I would not let the crude comment slide either but I think perhaps you need to address the catalyst to this situation. He sounds perhaps somewhat defensive about his constant use of his phone....that is what I would want to get out for a good airing.
Yes my tone probably was not nice but at that stage id had enough. I had brought my daughter to santa, to be told there was an hour's queue, so I said I couldn't wait that long, and as i was walking back to meet my husband,my son (2) was trying g to wriggle out of my husbands arms while he was on the phone. I'm sorry Fenway but I totally disagree with you . .Would you bring your kids out shopping or anywhere, and be totally on your phone the whole time? How could you look after 2 smallies doing that. What is so important on your phone that you would need to be looking at it the whole timw while out with your family?
what has you so distraught? The fact that he called you a name, the word he used?
Its never nice to be called a name and he should apologize. But what was your tone like? Did you bark at him, did you make him feel like he was the child and was being told what to do? While I think what he said was horrible and he needs to say sorry I also think its possible he snapped for a reason.
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By Ashish Kaul
You never know what's coming when you prefer being a couch potato one fine evening. It happened with me last night when I decided I must have tête-à-tête with news television too.
Suddenly I was engrossed in a debate – One was how to defeat Mr. Anna Hazare on his grounds. The second was how to humiliate the nation.
I also felt that witnessing the lower house of Parliament, most of the pension holders of our freedom struggle must want to leave the Earth than continue to watch the spoilsports.
The only people rejoicing at every turn of events must be the news channel heads who seem to be only caring about their TRPs and how to further the cause of their brands at the cost of 'We The People'.
I would not say it was a sad day for Indian Democracy. Most things happen in our country for good. And as I switched to an entertainment channel, I realized how insignificant the episode had become by then.
Well … almost like a game of cricket when India were going to lose anyway. But somehow it wasn't cricket being played last night in Parliament. It was a game of chess, where the pawns were being sacrificed to save the queen and the king from both the sides.
I do not wish to suggest anything here; I just want God to save us this time.


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Justin P. Bennett is an associate in the Tampa office of Burr & Forman, focusing on commercial litigation. Justin represents clients in various matters involving business torts, contract disputes, and general business and commercial litigation in both state and federal court.
He has experience representing and advising municipal corporations on civil rights and tort-related litigation and has extensive experience in managing large E-Discovery projects. Justin also has been involved with appeals in the Florida District Courts of Appeal and the United States Circuit Court of Appeals for the Eleventh Circuit.
While in law school, Justin served as an editor of the Stetson Law Review and served as a research assistant and head teaching assistant for federal civil procedure. He also interned for the Honorable Mary S. Scriven of the United States District Court for the Middle District of Florida.
Prior to joining Burr & Forman, Justin was a summer associate at Burr & Forman and at Mimi Smith & Associates, State Farm Corporate Litigation Counsel.


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I'm actually still here! Won't check out until tomorrow, but this has definitely been an enjoyable birthday trip for me. When I arrived to my room, it was nice and clean (it must have recently been cleaned because it smelled of bleach) and pleasantly cool. I immediately changed clothes and walked the couple of blocks to the beach. I will definitely stay here again when I come back to Fort Lauderdale. I may rent a car next time so that I may do a little more exploring, but there is public transit so it's not like you're stranded. The room is nice, the bed is a little creaky, but I don't care because after a full day of activities, I fell right to sleep anyway! There is a refrigerator and microwave in the room, as well as a sink, toaster, and coffee maker. Also, under the sink there's a plug-in range so that you can cook as well as plates, glasses, and silverware.More
View Deal
View all 8 deals from $112
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During my working life, I think it's safe to say that I've become known for my inane comments. I'm great at what I do and for the most part I'm the epitome of professionalism.
But there are times where my brain is working too fast and I don't stop to think. Or I get excited and forget to think. Or I'm tired and forget to think. Or I forget to think because my brain has given up and left me to defend for myself.
Whatever the reason, these are my best brainless moments. To be fair, the first one wasn't said at work, but it's maybe the most brainless thing I've said to date, close second to 'what date is Christmas?'
1. "How long do I have to cook 2 minute noodles for?"
2. On the phone at work: "Do you mind if I put you on hold?"
The other person, all professional: "No, but I'm answering phones today, so if you're on hold when you come back, I'm taking another call."
Me, friendly: "That's fine, we can take turns holding each other."
Shit. That came out wrong. There's no way to recover, just laugh. "Heh. Heh."
The other person, unimpressed. "… Yes…"
3. Answering an inquiry: "So, when that person is transported, will they be transported from one place to another?"
(At which point I heard my colleague snort behind me and then a snort from down the phone line.)
4. Reassuring a person: "That's been fixed, you can now rest in peace."
(Another snort behind me.) I meant 'rest easy' but what probably makes this worse is that I work in a medical field and the person was elderly. Thank god they had a sense of humour, after they recovered from their surprise.
I'm still employed, despite accidentally sexually harassing someone with suggestions of holding them, probably because I astounded someone with undeniable logic and being kind and thoughtful by giving someone premature blessings for their future death. (How often do you get to wish someone RIP to their face while they're still breathing?)
I've also so far resisted the urge to shout 'Surprise!' when I pick up the phone to answer the call of someone waiting longer than average in the call queue.
I haven't resisted the urge to do this at work:
Or build a cardboard box cubicle around my desk. All these things take only a few seconds of nonproductive time (depending on who you ask) and more often than not cheers someone else up.
I like my job, I can even find satisfaction in it, but I think when you have a repetitive job, you do the best that you can do to keep yourself sane. Those little brainless moments? They become priceless moments out of an entire day of the same old-same old.
I'm happy (?) to report that I've told more than one person to rest in peace before giving up and choosing another expression entirely.
I'm also happy to report that Mr Bunny is doing well and he now has a bunny friend to race.
All's well that ends well.
I think.


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I don't normally give a bad review about a crafty product. But seriously……what a nightmare. Others should be warned!
I found this picture on pinterest and told my friend I could make her a shirt that says the same thing.
I am crafty….I should be able to do this! I have made shirts in the past with fabric and while the end result was cute, the process is kind of a pain. So when I heard about this heat transfer vinyl I wanted to try it out. So I ordered what should have been enough vinyl for at least 4 shirts and started the shirt last night. First of all when you use heat transfer vinyl you have to cut everything backwards. This is OK if your using a gypsy- there is a button that does it for you. Not so OK when you are using SCAL. If there is a button to do this I don't know where it is! So I finally improvised and had my design ready to cut and the red vinyl was a disaster. I had to cut it 3 times and then just gave up and switched to black. I ran out of black because I had to do it twice since I forgot to mirror the image the first time. AND then while I was making the shirt I ironed on the question mark backward and since I am now out of vinyl…..there is no question mark. So my apologies to my friend…..your shirt isn't really so great but I will make you a replacement. You can wear this one to clean the house. LOL.
A side note about red vinyl- I think all the way around red vinyl is worthless. I have noticed when I use regular vinyl that the red just doesn't work. It doesn't cut well, it doesn't stick well. And the same with the heat transfer red vinyl. I am making a stand to no longer purchase red vinyl.
The shirt…..


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- it gives me goosebump. Err !!!!
-I know I've blogged about an incident about the infamous haunted Karak Highway but this one is a story that has been told to me over numerous times by different people of different background levels. Most of the time the stories about Karak Highway varies, afterall, its an urban legend! But this is one story that I find creepy but at the same time hard to believe. You be the judge.
It was late at night when a young couple and their baby was travelling in a car along the Karak Highway. They were trying to get home, like the rest of the other Malaysians because it was nearing festive season. And like the many other Malaysians, they choose to travel at night to avoid the traffic jam and also the heat of the sun when noon gets in the way.
As they were travelling along the lonely stretch of Karak Highway, suddenly, the car gave a sudden jerk and started making weird noises. The husband was fairly surprised because he remembered to check the car before travelling long distance to ensure the safety of his family. Soon, they had no choice but to stop by the roadside. The husband got out of the car to check the car engine while his wife and baby was waiting in the car. After a few minutes, he came back and reported that he could not see anything wrong and tried starting the car again. However, the car just would not budge. At loss, the husband made a difficult decision to either wait until another car comes along or walk to the nearest phone booth.
Not wanting to leave his family behind, they waited. After some 20 minutes or so, the highway remained quiet. The husband wondered why was there such calmity on the highway when festive celebrations are just around the corner. Perhaps it was due to the late night, he thought to himself. After what seemed like eternity, the husband decided to take the second option.
Advising his wife to lock the doors and take care, he left them behind with a heavy heart. His wife, on the other hand, watched her husband walk away with worries on her mind. She prayed hard that someone would eventually notice their stalled car and offer help. She was also worried that accidents might happen.
Hours passed by and soon she started getting even more worried. She was worried something might happen to her husband. Worried, she fought with herself over if she should just keep on waiting or leave the car behind and look for her husband. But where should she start looking? In the end, she decided to get out of the car to stretch her legs. As soon as she came out of the car, she realized that something was staring at her from behind. As she turned, she saw the bodiless head of her husband with his eyes and mouth wide open as if in shock staring back at her. Til this day, no one has found the remains of his body.
- well actually i heard about this scary story b4 , but it has a different version , sum says the wife and police sees a pontianak eating the flesh of the husband at the end- yaa which is hard for me to believe.
- Were the policemen speaking of the truth? They seemed to be serious about this pontianak case.
I heard the same version like earl-Ku..but some other points added:
1) It was in early 70′s
2)the couple was an indian husband and wife
3) Happened somehere around Genting Sempah.
4) the police are from the GOF ( General Operation Force, a half military police for or what Malaysian called as Jungle Squad or PPH back then)
5)before the police came, there was a loud bang ,like something fall on the car roof but the lady was so afraid to go out and check it out.
6) there were some cars passing by..and the cars keep honking and flashing the beam whenever they passed her car.
7) the police arrived and shot something on the car roof. and then using loud speaker to ask the lady to come out and dont look back.As the lady safely reached the police jeep, she turned around and saw her dead body of her hubby (with head) with tormented sratch and most of his internal abdomen were scattered on car roof.
so..here's some different version about the ending: The police said, they saw…
Version 1:
- A Banshee ( Pontianak) was eating her hubby on the car roof
- A big hairy-furry humanoid creature, like a werewolf ,just with a pair of wing…was eating her hubby on the car roof.
i dunno which version is real but i did asked my uncle , who was a police recruit back then and he also heard about the story ,passed over by his instructor and seniors.He said, the most told is the banshee version.
- And lastly, i remember 'Mastika' , (a Malay Magazine that resembled Readers Digest) did cover the story about this.They had interviews with some veteran policemen who actually were at the scene and involved in the investigation of the case..but not single one of them want to share and exposed the ending.It's like a really big confidential case and no one in the police department dare to open their mouth.. X-file, perhaps? >__<
- i heard d same story from my mom…spooooooky…


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Guess what, I am the Guest Designer for this week's Clean and Simple Challenge CAS183 – Sketch by Tenia! Here is Tenia's sketch:
This was a tough one for me, just couldn't wrap my brain around this sketch. I printed out the card and had it sitting on my desk for a couple of days, just waiting for inspiration to strike, but I got nothing. I was starting to freak out a little, so I decided to print out just the sketch. And then I saw the wave, lol. I tore a strip of Whisper White and sponged it with Pool Party and Island Indigo. I had planned to use the sailboat from Stampin' Up! Nursery Necessities, but the scale was wrong. I had this sailboat cut file, so I manipulated it to fit, printed it out and colored with Stampin' Up! Markers. I cut it out by hand and mounted with Dimensionals. I used some Studio G Glitter Glue to add a little sparkle to the water, then stamped the sentiment from Nursery Necessities.
Materials List
Stampin' Up! Whisper White Cardstock
Stampin' Up! Bashful Blue Cardstock
Stampin' Up! Nursery Necessities
Sail Boat Cut File by Samantha Walker
Stampin' Up! Pool Party Ink
Stampin' Up! Island Indigo Ink
Stampin' Up! Green Galore, Tempting Turquoise, Only Orange, Yo Yo Yellow Markers


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THE SUCCESS of the MailOnline website has led to a boom in digital advertising revenues at the owner of the Daily Mail newspaper.
Daily Mail & General Trust (DMGT) said yesterday that advertising revenues at its national newspaper websites had grown 51 per cent year-on-year in the three months to 30 December.
This made up for a nine per cent decline in advertising revenues at the company's newspapers, which include the Daily Mail, Mail on Sunday and Metro.
Last year, MailOnline became the world's most popular newspaper website and reached profitability for the first time since its birth in 2007. The website saw 127m unique users in January, the company said.
The online advertising boom meant that despite the decline in print, like-for-like advertising revenues at DMG Media – DMGT's national newspaper division – stayed relatively steady, dipping by one per cent. However, with a decline in circulation hitting newspaper sales, DMG Media's turnover fell seven per cent to £204m. DMGT's local newspaper arm, Northcliffe, saw revenues down eight per cent to £49m.
The division is being spun off into a new Local World venture, along with several other local newspaper groups.
James Titcomb