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My new favorite book and so validating as to why I have chosen this path of unconventional medicine; rather than as an MD treating sickness and symptoms, as a health coach teaching people to thrive and optimize their lives through intelligent movement, nourishing food, quality sleep, and stress management.
The prevalence of chronic disease is rising at an alarming rate. Kresser outlines how this is due, in part, to a broken medical system, highly regulated by insurance companies and Big Pharma whose incentives are financial gain rather than human health. The other significant factor is the mismatch between our environment and our genetic biology. Three key environmental shifts have led to an upsurge in chronic, debilitating disease;
1. The predominance of farms and factories, creating an abundance of disease promoting processed food and grains. Solution; A nutrient dense anti-inflammatory primal diet.
Living as a dancer has instilled in me incredible respect for the power of the body to meet extreme demands, when given the proper information. Despite initial frustrations with pain and injury, I came to realize that the body truly wants to be healthy, and to do its very best for us at all times. When I realized that I could partner with my body, rather than fight with it, healing power became paramount. I now combine my love of science and medicine, with the art of elegant movement and healing through my work as a Pilates teacher and health coach, guiding others to optimize their own lives through movement and healthy lifestyle choices.
Thanks to my all-star surgeon, Dr. Jason Snibbe, innovator of the Direct Superior Approach, my community, and health, I am now fourteen months post surgery (Bilateral hip replacements) and happily back in action. It is fascinating to learn to move powerfully again, integrating new high tech parts into the complex system of the body.
I am astonished by how quickly this occurs and have written about the experience in my blog www.empowerpilatesmalibu.com.
Here, on dancerhips.com, I share a series of these chronological blog entries in hopes of inspiring others on a similar path.
This journey continues to deepen my respect for the body's power to heal, and generates empathy for those in pain, seeking the keys to unlocking their potential for powerful movement. Thank you to my incredible community for all the love and support you have shown me. I will forever remember the team of friends arriving at my door each day, radiant with healing energy, and nutritious foods to fuel me. May this entire experience make me a better guide to others, with more energy and knowledge to give back to my community.
This past weekend I stole away to remote beaches and mountains, immersing myself in astounding natural beauty to revitalize. It is here that some of my best ideas come to life. With a clear mind, playing in nature, I discover an open space to think, innovate, and assimilate complex concepts into streamlined strategies for optimizing health and human performance.
Alongside my hikes and swims, I dove into one of my all time favorite books, Supple Leopard, by Dr. Kelly Starrett. While at first glance, this appears to be a book for cross fitters and Olympic weight lifters, the concepts for creating stability and mobility in the body are extremely valuable for every human being. I highly recommend it to all. Dr. Starrett is a leader in physical therapy, coaching, and revolutionizing how athletes think about movement. In this book, he teaches readers to breathe, stand, lift, push and pull with proper technique. Dr. Starrett takes one through fundamental principles that harness the power of midline stability and torque through the joints, thereby preventing injury and taking performance to optimal levels.
I am teaching these principles as fundamental concepts to my pilates students, and use them daily in my own practice of weight training, pilates, ballet, and by extension, into my sports of rock climbing, hiking and swimming. They are invaluable, and like gems that I have, at last, found after a life time of competitive sports, dance performance, and professional health studies. This work is never ending and ever expanding. When I find a protocol that assimilates complex concepts into a streamlined strategy, I am compelled to teach it and share the knowledge.
In Supple Leopard, Kelly teaches principles to optimize human performance that can be extrapolated to all types of movement. These include;
1. Breathing
2. Midline Stability (or Core stability)
3. Stabilization of the Shoulder and Hip Joints by generating Torque
In my own practice, I enjoy teaching these principles and seeing students light up with new control and understanding of how to generate power in their bodies. By teaching students to breathe properly, expanding lung capacity and activating the diaphragm, one also guides a student to shift from sympathetic "fight or flight" mode, to parasympathetic mode where deep stabilizers can be retrained. Guiding students to identify neutral spine and pelvis, understanding principles of alignment, provides them with foundational points for navigating movement. Muscle resistance isometrics lead students to activate their deep core musculature, (the 'inner corset") Tranverse Abdominus.
Adding Dr. Starrett's ideas, we activate full body stability and then layer on movement. Three pivotal concepts Starrett outlines are;
1. Torque/Hips; in Standing, feet parallel, screw the feet into the ground, as though the legs are screwdrivers, and reach into the floor as though one could spread it apart. This activates the glutes and deep hip stabilizers, and brings the pelvis into a neutral position.
2. Abdominal Bracing/Core Activation; generating tension in the Tranverse Abdominus, creating a corseting action of the ribs and abdominals
3. Torque/Shoulders; drawing the scapula (shoulder blades) down the back as though into one's back pockets; when holding a bar, screwing the hands into the bar as though one could snap it in two. This spirals the eyes of the elbows and the armpits forward, and engages deep stabilizers of the shoulder and scapula on the ribs. This also applies to weight bearing on the arms in plank/ handstand positions; think of screwing the hands into the floor in external rotation. Deeply stabilizing to the shoulders.
For me, this breaks down to three distinct zones to visualize in any movement;
1. Glutes Activated
2. Abdominal Rib Connection
3. Shoulder Blades hugging the ribs and reaching down towards the hips
This can be a tricky trio to teach, but it is like striking gold when one finds it. By adding the two way stretch of pilates, lengthening up through the occiput, and down through the sacrum and legs, we set ourselves up for success in multiple dimensions and with all kinds of loads.
Expect nothing. Be ready for anything. By training ourselves with midline stability, breath, torque through the hip and shoulder joints, and two way stretch, we can access incredible strength and enjoy a lifetime of healthy, empowering movement.
To your health,
With the array of diverging opinions on what a healthy approach to nutrition truly is, I turn to this easy- to-use chart, created by one of my personal guides in nutrition, Brandi Marshall.
Reseach into the principles of Primal Health, coupled with my own health turn around, lead me to find mounting evidence for the anti-aging, anti-inflammatory, immune boosting, hormone optimizing benefits of following this nutritional approach.
It is said that 80% of body composition is based upon food, in association with one's genetic profile. Food is very powerful. More so than most of us realize. Foods are essentially chemical compounds which influence how our genes will be expressed. It pays to be wise about what we expose our genes to! An essential first step is eliminating processed foods, sugars, and chemically altered oils from the diet. The changes in energy, mood, immune function, digestion, cognition and lean tissue will be rewarding! Aches and pain will diminish. Clarity of thought will heighten. Connective tissue (skin, ligaments, tendons, fascia) will become more elastic and resilient.
By focusing on the green zone foods in this list for 21 days, you can take an important step in reprogramming your genes towards optimal health. And create your own health turn-around! Here's to being vital!
Vegetables Leafy green vegetables
Tropical fruits
Processed foods Boxes, cans, tubes, jars
Bright colored vegetables
Starchy vegetables
Gluten containing grains Wheat, barley, rye
Sulfur containing vegetables cruciferous, mushrooms, onions
Starchy fruits
Conventional Dairy
Higher Fiber/Lower Sugar Fruits Berries
NonHgluten containing grains
Conventional Meats
Fats/Oils H Coconut, Avocado, Olive, grassfed butter or ghee (preferably raw)
Raw or organic dairy (case specific, as tolerable)
Fats/Oil – corn, canola, vegetable, and seed oil that is not cold pressed
Grass fed Beef
Fermented food – grassfed plain yogurt
Pasture Raised Chickens, Pork
Raw Nuts
Table Salt
Pasture Raised Eggs
Sea Salt
Tap Water
Wild Caught Fish
Organic Coffee
Bone Broth
Dining Out
Mixed Drinks
Fermented Foods Sauerkraut, pickles, kimchi, kombucha
Wine, spirits
Fast Food
Organ Meats
Spring Water or filtered water
Fresh herbs
Herbal tea
Brandi Marshall, NTP, FAFS
Nutritional Therapy Practitioner Tel: 805.813.0632 | Fax: 310.937.3399 email@example.com www.eclecticnutritionist.com
Do you want to feel vital, clear, and happy? Who doesn't, really?? The key lies in understanding how thought patterns are learned from experience, and how we can retrain the way we think, and hence, the way we feel. Our nervous system is constantly learning from what we choose to focus on, and its plasticity allows us to create systems we can thrive with.
How empowering it is to understand how our nervous system works and to be able to drive it towards our goals and well-being! And to realize that we can shift our own chemistry through the way we eat, move, sleep and think.
We are not passive recipients of the chemical orchestra inside our bodies. Rather, we are the captains of this ship, and have profound influence over the physiology of our bodies by the way we choose to interact with our environment, other people, and how we take care of ourselves. Indeed, our hormones, the chemical messengers of the body, are up-regulated or down-regulated by the stimuli or information we subject ourselves to. The science of epigenetics tells us that where we live, what we eat, how we move, sleep and think cause chemical modifications around genes, and effectively switch genes on or off. In essence, how we choose to live our lives influences how our genes are expressed. It pays to choose well!
A fascinating and inspiring book, The Science of Positivity, by neuroscientist Loretta Breuning, PhD, and founder of the Inner Mammal Institute, explains the keys to creating positive mindsets and thriving. Breuning teaches us how negative thought patterns form in our mammalian brains, to heighten our survival as a species, and how we can rewire and create a new model of positivity. Simple exercises lead to permanent shifts in neurochemistry, rewarding us with a flood of "happy chemicals": serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin. Yes, we can change our chemistry by what we choose to think about and focus on. No pill required.
She outlines a fantastic exercise for permanently rewiring the brain;
*Three times a day, stop and spend one minute thinking of your positive responses to something you are experiencing. It is important to note your personal agency in the given experience. By trusting your own ability to navigate, rather than feeling the frustration of the world spinning around you, especially in the face of negative feelings, you shift the neurochemical soup flooding your brain and body.
Some examples include;
1. When I feel aggravated by someone, I think about my personal power to choose how I respond.
2. When I feel underappreciated, I think how this drives me to develop my innovation instead of resorting to the status quo.
3. When I feel anxious, I pause, note the emotion (shifting it from my primitive fight of flight brain center to my higher cortex) , think of a positive action to take, and then reward myself with a fun activity. This might be taking a walk in nature, listening to inspiring music, meeting up with a friend, dancing, or any healthy activity that floods my brain with rewarding feelings. Science tells us the reward chemicals teach our nervous system to repeat this method of responding to a stressful experience, in a more progressive way.
Breuning's recipe calls for repeating this three times a day for one minute, over a period of six weeks straight. This teaches the brain to scan for positivity and empowering thoughts, effectively shifting the way you view the world, and therefore, the way you feel. New circuits will build if you give yourself a regular stream of new impulses.
This approach, noting a positive response to a situation (particularly a stressful one), shifts the chemistry flooding the brain and body form cortisol and stress hormones (which in excess can lead to inflammation, breakdown and disease), to the feel good chemicals, dopamine, seratonin and oxytocin. Not only do these make us feel good, but they teach us to repeat the behavior, shifting the way we think and respond in the future. Essentially, we can rewire our brains to positivity and happiness. And this leads to thriving health.
By instilling regular positive habits, we create mental grooves, or new boulevards in our neural pathways. In so doing, these new ways of thinking become speedy super highways. According to Breuning, "Prior pathways were built by chance experiences in youth. You can build new boulevards."
Be thre driver of your own experience. Want to feel great? Build the pathways you want to follow and use them frequently!
To your health,
What an incredibly inspiring weekend! Together with budding Primal Health coaches from across the world, I was honored to spend a weekend intensive learning with the masters, Mark Sisson, and Christine Hassler. Masterminding with brilliant, dynamic coaches from various cultures and regions, I am ignited with inspiration and drive to propel my mission forward: to empower and educate people to lead themselves to vibrant health and vitality through healthy movement, nutrition, mindset and recovery.
I am very proud to be in Mark Sisson's Primal Health Coach tribe, moving his own mission forward: to change the lives of 100 million people, empowering them to take full responsibility of their own health and enjoyment of life by investigating, discussing, and critically rethinking everything we've assumed to be true about health and wellness.
From the time I was a teenager, I have been intensely curious about optimizing human performance and life experience. It is obvious to me why I so quickly gravitated towards Mark's work.
Indeed, we both shared early pursuits towards a medical career which then diverted into professional athleticism. My own path entailed a journey to dance in Paris, France during my third year at UCSF Medical School, and evolved into a thirteen year career as a professional contemporary ballet dancer.
Like Mark, as an elite athlete, doing everything I thought was "right", according to conventional wisdom, to optimize my health and performance, I was deceived and sustained major health setbacks. Only five or six years ago, while I appeared to be the epitome of health on the outside, inside my body was deteriorating; I was diagnosed with osteoporosis, severe arthritis, pre-diabetes, anxiety, and more. I was a wreck, my brain was in a fog, and my body was so unstable, I could barely walk across the room in the morning.
I was blessed to find incredible mentors, such as Mark, and Lenny Parracino, who guided me to re examine what I had learned about health. I was forced to do a complete mindset transformation, and to discover that the pillars of my health lay in a high fat, whole food diet, void of grains, and prioritizing quality sleep and balanced movement. Through primal living, I felt my own body rebuild itself, reversing all my diagnoses, and boosting me to thriving levels again. To me, nothing short of a miracle!
Elegant, powerful movement is the greatest gift in the world to me. And therefore, I feel it is the greatest gift I have to give. I am now devoted to combining the art and the science of intelligent movement, guiding people to thrive with power and elegance in their bodies. And as a Primal Health Coach-to-be, to educate and empower people with the pillars of health found in Primal living; whole nutrient dense foods, quality sleep and recovery, balanced movement, and positive mindset.
Health and vitality to all!
Last week, a friend greeted me at the gym with the news that she was in pain, with shooting pains through her right arm. She was distraught and was asking if she should get an MRI, and if it was ok to move the area. I invited her into the pilates area and we did a simple joint stabilization exercise for her upper body, including head, neck, shoulders and ribs, involving isometric contraction with efficient alignment, core engagement and breathing. Within five minutes she was radiantly beaming. She could not believe the relief she felt. Her pain was highly diminished, and she said she felt connected in a way she never had. I taught her to do this exercise on her own. It is incredible to teach people to connect to their bodies and control their pain and function, through movement. These tools are invaluable and so rewarding.
I was elated to find that one of my favorite mentors recently spoke about the science of pain in a podcast on the Summit for Wellness. Lenny Parracino, a leader in the field of optimizing human function, has a talent for distilling key principles of health from a complex array of disciplines, and strategically applying them to get people out of pain and into optimal function. He has taught me principles that have been transformational in my own freedom from pain and performance optimization. I am compelled to share a few of them here. I hope this may guide others to move themselves into health and out of pain.
Did you know there are no nerve receptors for pain in the body? Pain is an output signal from the brain, in response to perceived threat. Pain is a danger signal the brain chooses to create, in response to a perceived threat or imbalance (tissue damage, stress, inflammation, body position, etc.) in the body. The intent is to protect the organism from harm.
TISSUE DAMAGE -----------> BRAIN----------> PAIN Signal
The brain is like a supercomputer, assimilating data coming in from nerve receptors throughout the body.
Once a threshold is met, the brain essentially decides, "I perceive a THREAT to my body's well being and must protect myself." It does so by sending an ALARM signal of PAIN.
This alarm signal is intended to cause one to STOP the triggers of pain. Amidst the disturbance of pain, we tend to forget its efficacy. It's a highly intelligent system designed for self-preservation. The brain is communicating, "Stop that! I want you to be healthy and stable!"
We are lucky to have a highly advanced medical system to turn to in times of extreme pain or trauma. However, in terms of pain management, chemical medications are far from effective in the long term, and often have detrimental effects.
An effective approach to treating pain includes;
1. Identify and remove the root causes/triggers. (Tissue damage, stress, compromised body position, unhealthy inflammation caused by Standard American Diet, imbalanced movement, negative stress response, lack of sleep/recovery time, and other causes of inflammation).
2. Load the organism in a safe, controlled manner. This desensitizes the system and teaches it to function without pain.
Identifying the prime cause of pain can be complex and difficult to determine. However, following a primal health approach with a focus on balanced movement, high quality nutrient dense foods, sleep and healthy mindset will support any pain management program. I am happy to guide people to make these shifts in their lives, and am currently on my way to being a Primal Health Coach (created by health and fitness guru, Mark Sisson), to enhance this optimization. Speaking from my own experience, it is an invaluable gift to move out of chronic pain, and into optimal living once again. I am overjoyed to help guide others to make this shift in their own lives.
Pain is the result of oversensitization and for this reason, progressive, strategic loading of the tissue (within safe limits) can be used to desensitize the system and reduce pain signaling. This is illustrated by the effectiveness of pilates; when students come in with pain, they find that by working against the gentle resistance of the springs, in healthy alignment, PAIN IS DIMINISHED. A sense of joy is experienced as one realizes they can move without pain. The effect is enduring, as the individual reprograms their brain, nerves, and body to rebalance through the loaded pilates movement. This is an important difference between the active work of pilates and movement, and the passive work of massage/body work. Active movement integrates information between the nervous system, the tissues, and fluids in the body, rebalancing the tension patterns. This integration leads to enduring results. When the nervous system senses stability in movement ("Oh yeah, I actually can do this without pain!"), the brain no longer perceives a threat, and pain signals stop. This is essentially a REBOOT of one's internal computer, resetting the patterns for healthy, pain free movement. Intelligent movement is the most enduring pain reliever I have experienced, and the science explains why.
Pain naturally drives us to move, another self-preserving response. Imagine the last time you hurt yourself. Let's imagine you hit your hand against a sharp corner on a counter. You were probably motivated to shake it. Movement increases the flow of blood and oxygen to the damaged tissue, and carry toxins out of the area. Immobility is generally damaging. A healthy organism is in perpetual motion to some degree. Nature is in constant motion. As we breathe the lungs expand and contract, our heart is pumping fluids through vessels, contracting and expanding, cells are constantly regenerating. Movement is essential to life. Disease is the product of stagnation.
Another excellent tool is isometric exercise. Maximal contraction of tissues in static positions, followed by relaxation, causes a flood of fluids and nutrients to the area, and can serve to recalibrate tension patterns. This can be highly effective in releasing chronic tension patterns in areas of the body. By activating deep stabilizers in the area, the nervous system senses stability, and as a result, may decrease signaling for local areas to "hold on", or guard with tension.
Understanding these concepts empowers us to modify our own pain experience, and optimize our health. We can use pain as a tool to guide us to know when the system is out of balance. Pain signals generally arise when our body's needs (often oxygen) are not being met, and the system is, therefore, feeling threatened. We can address the root causes of pain and work to reduce or stop them, which in turn, will lead to more optimal health. We can also modify our PERCEPTION OF THREAT, and train our nervous system to become more resilient, and less sensitive to stimuli. This can be done through progressive exposure to higher challenges, loading, and mindset training such as mindfulness and biofeedback.
One of my favorite books on this topic, that Lenny referred me to, is Explain Pain (Mosley and Butler). A must read for anyone seeking to understand the science of pain. Another is Todd Hargrove's, Better Movement, The Science and Practice of Moving with More Skill and Less Pain.
It is sheer joy to see people light up with the power of movement, to learn to stabilize, connect and move without pain; powerfully, efficiently, gracefully. To see them regain connection with their bodies, restoring vital energy that had been drained by chronic pain, is fuel to my fire for teaching. This renewed energy can then propel one to connect vibrantly with others, devote oneself to service and community, and live with joy and optimism. I have lived that journey and seek to share empowering tools with others to help them to do so as well.
You can listen to Lenny's brilliance in his Podcast with Bryan Carroll.
Thank you Bryan and Lenny for bringing this insight and inspiration to us all.
Move out of pain and into optimal living!
Best to all,
Graduation Week! I have just completed my Certificate of Applied Functional Sciences with the Gray Institute, (Go me!!) and am honored to be a part of this innovative community. Directed by Dr. Gary Gray, the "Father of Functional Movement, the CAFS program is one of kind with its approach to the three-dimensionality of movement, embracing the importance of entire body efficiency, and the upregulation of function through variety. I have been very lucky to be mentored personally by a rockstar roster of Gray fellows, including Lenny Parracino, Brandi Marshall, O'real Cotton, and Tina Johnson, alongside Dr. Gary Gray himself. I have been astounded by the generosity and openness with which these individuals share information; their passion for teaching, and for guiding others to optimal health, is remarkable.
Last weekend, I was honored to amongst the first graduates of Brian Johnson's Hero Training. Brian, a highly successful entrepreneur and devoted philosopher, is is a world class Optimizer, strategically combining wisdom of the ancients and contemporary masters with the rigors of modern science, to create strategies for highest success in life. His articulation of the science behind how simple daily practices lead to optimal health and human performance is unparalleled.
You might know of Brian's prolific work, Philosopher's Notes, or www.Optimize.Me, where he presents summaries (PDF's and audiofiles) encapsulating the highlights of books on health, peak performance, mindset, psychology, philosophy, and more, and connecting the dots on how to implement key elements into one's life. I am a huge fan!!
Brian and I share a common goal of creating a movement of individuals committed to being a little bit better every day; in mindset, physical health, and purposeful living; cheering each other on as we take consistent small steps towards empowering ourselves and those around us to live to our fullest potential, and to feel the vitality that ensues.
Critical to this is getting rock solid on the fundamentals; moving well, eating nourishing foods, sleeping and recovering optimally, and practicing positive mindset techniques which allow us to use stress constructively rather than destructively. Eating, moving, sleeping and thinking optimally ensure that we satisfy our primary needs (consider Maslow's hierarchy of needs beginning with food, shelter and safety), and this give us the foundation from which we can pursue higher goals, extending our energy towards lives of service to the world (Maslow's self actualization). These higher needs then become as essential to our lives as breathing, eating and drinking water. Fulfilling these higher needs generates feelings of value, purpose, joy and love. The equation is clear; Healthy people are happy people, and love giving doing great things for the world. Getting rock solid on the fundamental pillars of health--moving, eating, sleeping, and thinking optimally--- is the first step in creating joyful, fulfilling lives.
One of my favorite ideas inspired by Brian is turning fear into excitement.
We have all experienced the feeling of a racing heart, sweaty palms, and anxiety as we face a stressful event such as public speaking, performing onstage, or going on a first date! Based upon the work of Alison Wood Brooks, a researcher at Harvard Business School, Brian explains that viewing fear as excitement is a powerful way to harness the power of a high arousal state (sympathetic nervous system driven) and use it to inspire success. Get excited about getting stronger, rather than be stifled by fear!
I used this technique last year, right before my first major surgery, and can attest to its power! I have faced many pulse racing situations in my life, particularly as a professional dancer feeling the surge of adrenaline every time I go onstage, scrubbing in on surgeries in medical school, traveling solo around the world, or scaling to the top of rock walls. I have learned to use this heightened physiological state to enhance my performance. I know how to prepare myself with mindset, physical training, and research to attain optimal outcomes. Yet, I had never been faced with the unknown inherent in trusting my body and life to a surgeon, and all the variables of hospital conditions, staff preparation, and others that go along with it. These were out of my control. That made me more than a little anxious! I chose to channel all my fear into excitement, getting myself fired up about being in top physical condition again, moving powerfully, the way I love to, and begin able to direct my energy outward towards others again, using my own experiences to help guide others to health and optimal living. This kept my arousal state high, and propelled me to do all the work necessary on my part (research, physical and mental conditioning), to set the conditions for a great outcome.
This simple technique, shifting one's perspective, is life changing; using high sympathetic drive for constructive outcomes, rather than being inhibited by them. Practice saying, "I am EXCITED", in the face of fear, and observe the results for yourself. Feel how fun it is to get great at operating in high arousal states!
Other favorite key ideas Brian conveyed over the weekend include;
1. Be Committed to Being Committed! (Whatever the commitment, just do it!)
2. Create Masterpiece Days; Determine keystone habits for your mornings and evenings which set the day up to be fantastic. You are the master. Create the days that fire you up!
3. Determine Deep Work time blocks; Set aside key time for the tough stuff, requiring creativity and innovation. Set yourself up for success by honoring your most innovative time of day, and blocking out distractions.
4. Be a Thought Warrior; Inspired by Pema Chodron, pull the weeds of toxic thoughts from the garden of your mind. Acknowledge negative thoughts for what they are and bid them farewell. Being a consistent gardener of a vibrant mind, or pour concrete on your blooming garden. What do you choose?
5. Prioritize Your Life Force. Know what fuels it, and what drains it. Choose activities and relationships that fuel it. Let go of those that do not.
6. Identify your desired Identity first thing in the morning. I AM A WORLD CLASS .......... (athlete, teacher, wife, whatever drives you). Envision yourself being that, and what it feels like. This plants the seed that directs all the decisions you make during the day, and the feelings that will follow.
IDENTITY ------> BEHAVIORS AND THOUGHTS----------->FEELINGS (which then reinforce the identity!)
So many more great ideas to share! Get ignited about actualizing your potential, and check out Brian's work at www.optimize.me. Join the tribe. Get fired up about actualizing your potential! Here's to the best May ever.


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"I think most of us are raised with preconceived notions of the choices we're supposed to make. We waste so much time making decisions based on someone else's idea of our happiness—what will make you a good citizen or wife or daughter or actress. Nobody says, Just be happy—go be a cobbler or live with goats.'"
"I was never the kind of girl who said, One day, I am going to be a beautiful bride, and I am going to have a family.' I wanted to work to support myself and make my parents proud. All I did was work. I did three or four films a year and felt like I was on a treadmill. Finally I said, Nothing is exciting to me anymore.' So I took six months off, which turned into a year, and said God, I don't miss it.' That's when all kinds of interesting things crossed my path."
"I feel a huge responsibility to anyone who's younger than me, in [helping her] take the road less traveled, or finding no road at all and blazing a new trail."
"I would say if you are going to party, show up on time to work."
"I did that at that age. All I wanted to do was just be like the other girls in my school. All I wanted was a pair of Levi's straight-leg jeans, and all my mom had for me is green velvet bell-bottoms from Germany. Guess what! Bell-bottoms were out. I got my ass whooped."
"You know why I looked hot? Because everyone was looking at Ryan. Our stuff was hanging in each other's faces, and we didn't care. But seriously, I wanted to do a good job because people are paying their hard-earned money to come and be entertained and surprised and to see my fabulous naked scene. And if there are no lines outside theaters on June 19, I'm going to be so pissed."

subset: commoncrawl


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Responsive Website Design with Twitter Bootstrap
There is nothing more annoying than trying to view half of a web site on half of a computer screen and having to scroll to see the periphery of the sight, but did you know that besides making the site difficult to view, the decision not to incorporate responsive web design may also be detrimental to the site's rank ability? Responsive web design is quickly replacing the practice of developing both a regular site and a mobile sight. Google has stated that responsive web design is the industry best practice which means that incorporating it will get your content ranked higher than that of your competitors.
Responsive web design is an approach to web design that aims to provide visitors to a site with an optimal viewing experience and the greatest ease of interaction with the site. A well-designed web site that incorporates responsive web design should be easily navigable on a wide range of devices of any size with no need for the viewer to have to re-size, pan or scroll.
The first web site to incorporate a layout that would adapt to the viewpoint of a browser was Audi.com in 2001. On some browsers, the layout would adapt dynamically, but on others the page had to be reloaded from the server if it was re-sized. By 2008 CSS3 media queries were entering the mainstream and the "liquid" layout concept was gaining traction. This "fluid grid" concept calls for element sizing to be in relative units such as percentages in lieu of pixels or points. Media queries allow the page to use different CSS style rules based on the characteristics of the device.
Besides the advantages mentioned above, responsive web design can make the design process and SEO much easier. By incorporating responsive web design, you no longer have to develop separate desktop and mobile sites. Moreover, the absence of multiple URLs for the same content helps to prevent the dilution of page rank. Responsive web design reduces your site's loading time significantly since it does not require a redirection to a different URL on mobile devices. Of course, expedited loading time means better SEO!
How To Use Rich Snippets
Anyone using a certain search engine known as Google has enjoyed the convenience of rich snippets. Way back in 2009, Google developed rich snippets and added them to their engine's search results to provide users with instant information on a large variety of subjects such as people, food recipes and product reviews. Over the last few years, the team at Google has added even more categories to their rich snippet information, and it is expected that they will add still more in the future. The aim of rich snippets is to provide the user with as much information as possible about the site that is pertinent to the search before the user decides whether or not to click on the site. This can, of course, give web developers a chance to promote their content with greater efficiency provided they know how to optimize their content for Google's many algorithms.
In 2011, Google consented to work in tandem with other search engines such a Yahoo and Bing to create a set of standards that could be used for all search engines to improve search results. These new paradigms universalize search engine results in such a way that, when exploited correctly, can offer web developers the opportunity for greater visibility of their clients' content. Thus this content can be developed for a higher premium.
In addition to helping the Google algorithms to better index and understand content, the inclusion of structured data markup can be used to create and display rich snippets within the search results. To make your pages eligible for rich snippets in search results, you must add structured data of the appropriate type to your content. In some instances, you may need to comply with specific policies for a certain type of rich snippet display. The following rich snippet categories are supported:
-Product Information – This includes general information about the product such as price, availability and review ratings.
-Reviews – A review of an item such as a movie, music release, store or restaurant can be given.
-Events – An organized event, such as a concert or festival, that takes place at a particular time and place can be provided.
-Software Applications – Information about an app, including its URL, ratings and price can be provided.
Using the Structured Data Testing Tool, you can test the site's content, but be patient: It may take a little time for some rich snippets to show up in search results. If correctly marked content does not appear to trigger rich snippet in search engine results, check to make certain that content is in compliance with Webmaster Quality Guidelines and Structured Data Policies.
Using the Google Rich Snippet SEO media tool you can create structured data that is written by Googles tools and input it into your page either through html markup or Json <script> file. Its easy and fun to use, plus you get the benefits of SEO data when clients perform a Google search on your company.
If your not familiar with how to do this we offer a service and for 75.00 we will markup your website and write the necessary code it takes to get you the types of rich snippet media you read about in this article. Just email us at firstname.lastname@example.com to get started. Simply ask about rich snippet data and how we it can work for your website.
Online Forms of Marketing
Traditional marketing has taken a backseat since the age of the internet. The numerous forms of internet marketing has replaced most traditional forms and most companies and online businesses prefer to go digital with their marketing schemes. Online marketing enjoys abundant advantages over traditional marketing which is why it is the most preferred choice for stand-alone businesses and websites as well.
Social media is the best form of marketing as of now considering almost everyone with a Smartphone and access to the internet is a part of it. Be it Facebook, Twitter, or YouTube, social media is everywhere and with every website providing a share button to these social forums, it is easier to connect to hundreds and thousands of people with few clicks and shares.
SEO (Search engine optimization) is a form of marketing that improves the visibility and ranking of your web pages in order to increase the traffic. SEO is one of the most important online forms of marketing and if your competitor is more knowledgeable about it than you, it could ring disaster bells for you. SEO requires a lot of hard work, but if used correctly, can market your website beyond what you hope to achieve.
Another form of online marketing is pay-per-click, which is online marketing where you literally pay per clicks to advertise your website or products. You can buy these advertisements from Facebook and Google for example, and pay for every click the ads generate and bring your viewers and customers.
What Applications can I use To Track Rankings for Windows?
Ranking tools and software provide a good way to learn White Hat SEO techniques and track rankings. There is an abundance of applications available to track ranking for Windows. There are both paid and free applications you can use to track your website's ranking. Here are a few great applications that can help in tracking ranking for windows:
Cute Rank (FREE)
Cute Rank (Download) is one of the best free applications to track rankings. You can track rankings in multiple formats and generate reports for search engines such as AOL, Google, Yahoo, Bing (MSN), and Ask.
Rank Tracker
Rank Tracker (Download) is a multi-purpose application that focuses on the rankings of search engine and is available for Windows users. This app can track your rank on up to 392 search engines. It also lets you research keywords and monitor their progress.
Ezee Rank Tracker
Ezee Rank Tracker is the answer for every Windows user who wants to track their site's rank. What makes this application great is it provides comprehensive and detailed reports of rankings.
If you are a Windows user who wants to track their website's rank on multiple sites easily, and learn white hat SEO in the process, the above applications are perfect. Each tool offers a slew of features that help you track rankings and a lot more.
How On-Page Optimization Will Save You Money
Small business enterprises worry about saving their money, but have absolutely no idea how to get it done. Small Business SEO is an excellent way to gain online visibility and save their money through on-page optimization. Here are few tips how on-page optimization will save you money.
It requires Little Investment
On-Page optimization is a cost-effective approach, because all it takes is a little investment in the form of seo techniques.In other words, the return on investment (ROI) is high, thus saving small businesses a considerable amount of capital and without paying for a pay per click campaign.
It Helps you Gain Web Traffic without Months of Work
Traffic is the most important aspect for any website around the world, and this is where small business SEO matters. The process of on-page optimization helps rank your page around certain keywords, generating traffic when users search with those keywords. As such, it takes a few weeks to significantly increase your web traffic, not the never-ending process and paying of Adwords and costs associated with other forms of marketing. This saves you plenty of money and you can easily apply the money that you don't have to spend in other areas of your business. Be around longer and keep a good ranking for years to come with SEO.
It improves both Visibility and Conversion
For any small business, SEO and its rankings / visibility matters more than people think and is directly related to website sales. The higher the rankings, the more visible the company will be and thus the greater the number of possible conversions from new traffic. You can gain visibility, Google search rankings, and new sales with one cost-effective tool. view white list marketing firm services
Is Moz DA the new PR?
The MOZ domain authority (DA) is a rising star when it comes to gauging how well a domain will perform. With over 10 years of experience and a host of benefits Page Rank (PR) simply cannot give, many believe MOZ DA is the new PR. But is that true?
Domain Authority
A website that has a rank of at least 35 has some sort of Authority. In order to measure the DA of the website, a number of metrics such as mozTrust, root domains, number of total links and mozRank are combined. Domain Authority also looks at aspects such as SEO, content, and how often they buy moz da backlinks.
Page Rank
Google introduced their Page Rank algorithm and it is used to measure the equity of links. One of the major factors that influence the PR of a website is how much they buy backlinks.
Comparing Page Rank with Moz's Domain Authority
The one thing common between Domain Authority and Page Rank is that both check how often a site will buy moz da backlinks. Today, the DA is replacing PR because DA covers a vast domain compared to its predecessor. Domain Authority is a third party algorithm whereas Google itself calculates Page Rank.
How to Learn Black Hat SEO
If you want quick traffic on your website, Black Hat search engine optimization (SEO) can help you achieve it. If you want to learn black hat SEO, so you won't have to pay an SEO expert, the ideal way to do so is using online resources. Here is a look at a few great places where you can learn black hat SEO.
Forums and Communities for Black Hat SEO
You can learn black hat SEO from various online forums, accessing the information you need at any time. What makes these forums and communities great is you can always ask questions and someone will teach you what you need.
Black Hat Blogs
Black hat blogs can also turn out to be an ideal platform if you want to learn black hat SEO. These blogs are great because most teach the secrets of black hat industry in a very simple language.
Google Books
Many website owners will never help you learn black hat SEO, and it is understandable. If you can't find help elsewhere, there are a number of resources you can find on Google Books. Here, you will find entire books that will help your learn all you need to about this type of SEO.
Even though you can learn black hat SEO, you need to understand it's not the best way to improve your visibility. However, used masterfully, it can be a great weapon.
♠Embed This Video On Your Site♦
Benefits of On-Page Optimization
On-Page Optimization is crucial if you want to rank 1 in Google. However, most websites are unable to attain good rankings because they have good content but not enough optimizations. To rank 1 in Google, you need to optimize quality content. Here is a look at some of the key benefits of on-page optimization:
How to Learn White Hat SEO
White Hat SEO is an essential part of search engine optimization (SEO), conforming to the guidelines of the search engine. If you want to learn White Hat SEO, here is a list of some great websites that will help you do so. Another ideal place to learn White Hat SEO online is Word Stream. Here, you will find plenty of great information about what White Hat SEO is and how it works. You will also find a number of great advanced guides. If you want to learn White Hat SEO techniques, there is no better place than following Google Webmaster Guidelines. As an ideal platform, it provides you limitless answers and is another great place to get started. The key to success is to continue practicing and experimenting on a regular basis. The websites mentioned above will help you accomplish learning the basics of white hat SEO techniques. In no time at all, you will learn advance tips and begin mastering the art of and donning a "white hat" in the world of search engine optimization.
Another ideal place to learn White Hat SEO online is Word Stream. Here, you will find plenty of great information about what White Hat SEO is and how it works. You will also find a number of great advanced guides.
If you want to learn White Hat SEO techniques, there is no better place than following Google Webmaster Guidelines. As an ideal platform, it provides you limitless answers and is another great place to get started.
The key to success is to continue practicing and experimenting on a regular basis. The websites mentioned above will help you accomplish learning the basics of white hat SEO techniques. In no time at all, you will learn advance tips and begin mastering the art of and donning a "white hat" in the world of search engine optimization.
What is Search Engine Optimization
Q.What is search engine optimization?
A. Search engine optimization is the fine tuning of both an online web page and backlink profile to attain high rankings in all of the major search engines such as Google, Yahoo, and Bing.
When deciding to optimize a webpage for a specific ranking you need to calculate density, and make sure that all your meta data is correctly optimized. In your title tag, optimize for only two keyword phrases three tops. Here is an example…
<title>SEO,SEO Optimization,Search Engine Optimization | White List Marketing Firm</title>
Make sure your meta data is up to par, choose one of the main keyword phrase's to SEO. For example you want to optimize for the keyword phrase SEO. You need to mention the keyword phrase 2 times in the meta description for example.
<Meta name="description" content="This is the description about SEO for Google's search engine. If you want your pages to appear high in the search results then use this SEO method to get it." >
For your keywords you want to copy the exact title of and entre it into the keyword content. So based on the title tag you would do something like this, here is an example.
<meta name="keywords" content=" SEO,SEO Optimization,Search Engine Optimization">
The next thing that you need to focus on is your content you want from 225 words to 330 words with the keywords phrase that you choose to mention in the meta description 3 times within the content. Make room for at least 2 paragraphs that mention your targeted keyword.
If you have any links then you need to make sure the anchor, if it's the targeted keyword, needs to be SEO, the title of that link needs to be SEO and the file name needs to be SEO.
On an image tag you want the picture file name to be called the target keyword, the alt tag to be the targeted keyword phrase and the title tag needs to be the targeted keyword phrase.
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text:
XMM observation of M 87
II. Abundance structure of the interstellar and intergalactic medium
Max-Planck-Institut für Extraterrestrial Physik, 85748 Garching, Germany
Corresponding author: K. Matsushita, email@example.com
Accepted: 22 November 2002
Based on a detailed study of the temperature structure of the intracluster medium in the halo of M 87, abundance profiles of 7 elements, O, Mg, Si, S, Ar, Ca, and Fe are derived. In addition, abundance ratios are derived from the ratios of line strengths, whose temperature dependences are small within the temperature range of the ICM of M 87. The abundances of Si, S, Ar, Ca and Fe show strong decreasing gradients outside 2' and become nearly constant within the radius at ~1.5 solar. The Fe/Si ratio is determined to be 0.9 solar with no radial gradient. In contrast, the O abundance is less than a half of the Si abundance at the center and has a flatter gradient. The Mg abundance is ~1 solar within 2', which is close to stellar abundance within the same radius. The O/Si/Fe pattern of M 87 is located at the simple extension of that of Galactic stars. The observed Mg/O ratio is about 1.25 solar, which is also the same ratio as for Galactic stars. The O/Si/Fe ratio indicates that the SN Ia contribution to Si and Fe becomes important towards the center and SN Ia products have similar abundances of Si and Fe at least around M 87, which may reflect dimmer SN Ia observed in old stellar systems. The S abundance is similar to the Si abundance at the center, but has a steeper gradient. This result suggests that the S/Si ratio of SN II products is much smaller than the solar ratio.
Key words: galaxies: individual: M 87 / galaxies: intergalactic medium / galaxies: ISM / X-rays: galaxies: clusters


text:
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A management company that is easy to work with. We have move in and out of their properties and they are always fair and helpful in either case. Their properties are very well maintained and they are always responsive to tenant needs.
Rreef Management Company is located at 8275 SW Cirrus Dr, Beaverton, OR. This location is in the Vose neighborhood. This business specializes in Property Management.


text:
The Engagement Diamond
You've found the engagement ring setting she's always dreamed of, and now you need its crowning centerpiece — the engagement diamond.
Every Robbins Brothers diamond has the structural integrity, enduring quality and stunning visual beauty to last a lifetime. That's what makes it an engagement diamond and makes you the hero.
With thousands of loose diamonds to choose from, you'll find just the right size, shape and quality cut to fit the ring (as well as your budget) perfectly.
Diamond Quality
Only 1 in 10 diamonds makes the cut.
Although diamond certificates are helpful guides to the 4 C's, just know they should not be the only measure of your diamond. The most important factor is how the diamond looks, something we refer to as visual beauty. Our buyer personally examines every stone to make sure it is gorgeous — no wonder he rejects 9 of 10.
Each of our diamonds is responsibly sourced, conflict free and structurally sound. A thing of beauty in more ways than one.
This is her lifelong companion — and she deserves the best. Which probably explains why she chose you.
Diamond Viewing Room
The learning lab where you'll see what makes a diamond sparkle.
Here, there's no glass or partition separating you and your future diamond. Just proper lighting, a gem scope, grading tray and scale.
We give you the tools of the trade to ensure that you see every nuance of the diamond that you'll call your own. That's our policy. Totally transparent - with sparkles.
We guide you through the process of selecting your diamond, seeing several side by side for comparison and finding the one that speaks to you. You'll know when you find your perfect diamond. And she'll love it because you picked it just for her. Genius.
Diamond Guarantee
Here's a bright idea: offer diamonds that last a lifetime. Then add in a 110% guarantee.
Our diamonds are as beautiful on the inside as they are on the outside. No chips or fractures that will compromise the life of the diamond. No hazy diamonds, either. Only visually beautiful, quality diamonds that will sparkle just like her. These aren't mere words. Every diamond that you buy from Robbins Brothers comes with a 110% Diamond Guarantee.
110% Lifetime Warranty [See Details]
110% Trade Up [See Details]
110% Sparkle Guarantee [See Details]
We stand behind the quality of our diamonds 110%, and better yet, we put it in writing.
See Details
We will replace any diamond, ruby, and sapphire which in normal use chips, cracks or separates from its mounting and is lost with a diamond, ruby, or sapphire of comparable quality up to 110% of the original gemstone purchase price for the purchaser's lifetime. If a lab-created diamond is purchased, then it must be replaced with another lab created diamond up to 110% of the purchase price and is subject to availability.
Details: This warranty is valid, provided the diamond, ruby, and sapphire mounting have been cleaned and checked once a year and that such inspection has been verified in writing in the space provided in the Lifetime Diamond Warranty Booklet by an authorized representative of Robbins Brothers. The 110% Lifetime Diamond and Gemstone Warranty is nontransferable and will be considered invalid should the purchaser have the ring worked on by any jeweler other than Robbins Brothers. Your 110% Lifetime Diamond and Gemstone Warranty will be honored when you bring your ring to any Robbins Brothers location. Please be sure to bring the Lifetime Diamond and Gemstone Warranty booklet and your sales receipt with you to take advantage of the free inspection and cleaning. Remember, you must have your diamond ring inspected once a year, perform any necessary repair and have the inspection verified in writing to keep your 110% Lifetime Diamond and Gemstone Warranty valid.


text:
Friday 03 May 2013, 7.30pm
Wagner Prelude to Act 1 of Lohengrin (c.9')
Beethoven Piano Concerto No.5 'The Emperor' (c.40')
Vaughan Williams Symphony No.9 (c.36')
Steven Osbornepiano
Andrew Manze conductor
BBC Scottish Symphony Orchestra
Few composers were more aware than Ralph Vaughan Williams of what it meant to write a Ninth Symphony - and few have been less daunted. The composer may have been 85 years old, but 1950s audiences heard a symphony of astonishing power, ambition and imaginative fire: a contemporary prophet looking forward, not back. It's a strikingly equal match for Beethoven's mighty 'Emperor' concerto, here performed with the grace and intelligence we have come to expect from Scottish pianist Steven Osborne. And for once, Richard Wagner doesn't quite steal the show, though his visionary Lohengrin prelude burns with the same inner light. The orchestra's Associate Guest Conductor, Andrew Manze conducts.
This concert will be recorded for future broadcast on BBC Radio 3.


text:
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CarbonicSystems is gas supply company specializing in the customization and perfection of beverage dispensing. We supply the I-5 corridor in Washingon and Oregon with 24 hour service.
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Carbonic Systems is located at 800 Harney St, Vancouver, WA. This location is in the Esther Short neighborhood. This business specializes in Business Services.


text:
Expression v.3.3.0370
On this page
Fast anti-aliased screen preview, user-definable bitmap strokes with alpha channel, vector/bitmap warping, editable soft-edged and embossed vector shapes, paper textures, blending modes, transparent gradients, bitmap creation, editing and import/export, Photoshop filter support for bitmap objects, interactive Flash SWF button generation, ICC color management, variable width editing and many more powerful features!
- Rate:
- Release Date:03/09/2011
- License:Commercial
- Category:Multimedia & Graphic Design
- Developer:Microsoft
- Downloads:19
- Price: $149.00
To free download a trial version of Expression, click here
To visit developer homepage of Expression, click here
System Requirements
Expression requires Windows.
Expression v.3.3.0370 Copyright
Shareware Junction periodically updates pricing and software information of Expression v.3.3.0370 full version from the publisher using pad file and submit from users. Software piracy is theft, Using crack, password, serial numbers, registration codes, key generators, cd key, hacks is illegal and prevent future development of Expression v.3.3.0370 Edition. Download links are directly from our publisher sites. Links Expression v.3.3.0370 from Bittorrent, mediafire.com, uploadfiles.com, hotfiles.com rapidshare.com, megaupload.com, netload.in, storage.to, depositfiles.com and other files hosting are not allowed. The download file is obtained directly from the publisher, not from any Peer to Peer file sharing applications such as Shareaza, Limewire, Kazaa, Imesh, eDonkey, eMule, Ares, BearShare, Overnet, Morpheus, BitTorrent Azureus and WinMX.
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Horizontal Menu Advancer is an advanced add-in for Expression Web 4 and FrontPage 2003 allows to create light-weight horizontal CSS dropdown menus without Javascript/CSS hand coding. Library of free professionally-designed styles included.
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Vertical Menu Advancer for Expression Web provides simple way to add vertical dropdown menus to websites without coding. This menu builder creates menus using eye-catching templates and gives function set to make custom design through intuitive GUI
Accordion Menu Expression Web Addin v.188.8.131.52
Expression Web 4 add-in is an easy-to-use tool that creates accordion menus on your website easily. It has an intuitive GUI and extensive library of free professionally designed templates. It saves your time as it does not require hand coding.
Logic Expression v.3.00
Program Logic Expression (LE) calculates and analyzes the logical (Boolean) expression. Supports logical operators: negation, conjunction, disjunction, exclusive disjunction, implication and equivalence.
Expression Extras SEO Tools for v.1.0
The SEO Tools for Microsoft Expression Web add-in helps you prepare your site and pages for Google, Bing, and other Internet search engines. Integrated with Expression Web, you'll have all the tools you need to help get your site and pages noticed.
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text:
The Worst Witch1986
The Worst Witch (1986)
Critic Consensus: No consensus yet.
The Worst Witch Photos
Movie Info
as Mildred Hubble
as Miss Cackle
as Miss Constance Hardbroom
as The Grand Wizard
as Natalie Sinister
as Spinner Webb
Critic Reviews for The Worst Witch
All Critics (1) | Fresh (1) | Rotten (0)
Audience Reviews for The Worst Witch
I really wanted to like this movie, but it was just so simplistic that I started to wonder why they had the characters be witches. I suppose it was just because it was a TV movie and they wanted a movie for kids to watch on Halloween that had a good lesson in the end. I think kids would enjoy this, but not older people.
Super Reviewer
Fun, plus Tim Curry Sings that's got to be worth something
Super Reviewer
The Worst Witch Quotes
There are no approved quotes yet for this movie.


text:
Taff50ish wrote:Hi All,
This is a shame indeed, but it does now mean I can make a Beer Fest just outside Cambridge on the Sat Night now!!! So all is not lost!!!
As to the reason, who knows!!!??? But I did notice some of these Muppets starting to show up to the Walton Bridge Breakfast meet a while ago!!! They do ruin it for everyone!!! Getting away nice and quick with some spirit is one thing, but going backwards and forwards, then sitting there Burning out is quite another!!!
Well, that should stir it up a bit, maybe!!! Lets hope October is back on and the Weather holds!!! All the best till then chaps, cheers,
andyd wrote:Hope October is all good for anyone going to QS......
Andrew 2.8i wrote:andyd wrote:Hope October is all good for anyone going to QS......
I'll definitely be going. If it's on, that is....
It's a pity that you won't be going, but hopefully some forum members may be able to come along, weather permitting!
Caprifan Rob wrote:going to Castle Coombe on Saturday instead now, my eldest is showing his, so hitched a free ride
Andrew 2.8i wrote:Caprifan Rob wrote:going to Castle Coombe on Saturday instead now, my eldest is showing his, so hitched a free ride
Hi Rob,
Have a good one! What's on, is it a BMW club thing?
sheff wrote:Good to see the event is still going ahead, which shows there's not a hidden agenda with the cancellation of the morning meet.
Andrew 2.8i wrote:Hi Neil,
As you say, the evening meet is fine for locals.......not so fine when there's a two hour drive back home and an early start for work the next morning. Sadly, for me, it's one to miss.
sheff wrote: it maybe time to take the Golf GTI to its first breakfast meet
Andrew 2.8i wrote:sheff wrote: it maybe time to take the Golf GTI to its first breakfast meet
Hi Neil,
It would be great to see the car after all the work that you've done to it.
Andrew 2.8i wrote:Hi All,
In case anybody was wondering, the reason that the September meet was cancelled at the request of the Police was because QS was the location of a planned march by the lesbian, gay, bi- and transgender community......
Give me classic cars any day!
Paul G wrote:Whilst I have no problem with what people do in their own bedrooms the way it's going I fear it will be bloody compulsory soon
Caprifan Rob wrote:Is anyone going this Sunday 8th ?
Andrew 2.8i wrote:Caprifan Rob wrote:Is anyone going this Sunday 8th ?
Hi Rob,
I am, are you?
Caprifan Rob wrote:Yes I'll be going, plan on taking the Capri unless it's a washout
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


text:
The Legend of Link: Bob and Jim's Excellent Adventure
A/N: To start off, this parody has no relation whatsoever to Bill and Tim's Excellent Adventure, save the name resemblance. Now thank you for reading this! =) This is a story based on two characters from my parody, The Legend of Link: Ocarina of Time. They are two Lizalfos called Bob and Jim, who are lucky enough to encounter Link many times in their life. But what went on in between those encounters is what this story is all about. So, I welcome you to take up a seat and experience Bob and Jim's Excellent Adventure. Enjoy! =)
Chapter 1: Lizalfos for Hire!
Once upon a time there was a land called Hyrule. It was a prosperous land-
Link: We've already heard this before, now get on with the story!
Fine. In the great mountain range of Hyrule there lived two Lizalfos. Their names were Bob and Jim. Now Bob and Jim were unemployed and broke, not a good combination, and were looking for work.
Jim: Hey, Bob! Can you get me some TP!
Bob: Did you use up all the roll again!?!
Jim: Well…yeah.
Bob: Well we don't have any more so you'll just have to use a paper towel or something.
Jim: Um…we're all out of those too.
Bob: Man, we need a job.
Phone: Riiiiiiiiiiiiiinnggggg!!!!!!!!!!
Bob: I've got it. Hai.
Mysterious Voice: Hello.
Bob: Hey.
Mysterious Voice: Howdy.
Bob: Wazzup?
Mysterious Voice: Not much.
Bob: Oh.
Mysterious Voice: Do you need work?
Bob: Yes!
Mysterious voice: Then meet me at the entrance to Dodongo's Cavern at midnight tonight. Don't be late.
Bob: All right.
Mysterious Voice: Good day!
Bob: See ya.
Jim: Who was that?
Bob: Some guy. He wants us to meet him at Dodongo's Cavern at midnight for some work.
That night, Bob and Jim arrived at Dodongo's Cavern at 11:45 to meet the owner of the Mysterious Voice.
Jim: Bob, I'm cold. Let's just go home.
Bob: But we need more TP, remember?! We have to stay.
After about 15 minutes, a shadowy shape appears in front of them.
Shadowy Figure: Good evening.
Bob: Right back at ya!
Shadowy Figure: You need work, am I correct?
Bob: Yep.
Shadowy Figure: Well, I have a job for you to do. I am starting an "amusement park" here at the Dodongo's Cavern called, The Dodongo's Explosive Cavern, and I need you two to be the upholders of the rules.
Jim: Do we get cool badges?
Shadowy Figure: No.
Jim: Darn it.
Bob: Well do we get a cool name then?
Shadowy Figure: I suppose a name is all right. Maybe, "The Lizalfos Patrol"?
Bob: Na, too plain. How bout the, "Dodongo's Explosive Cavern's Group of Lizalfos Who Are Trying to Promote the Welfare of the Dodongos"?
Shadowy Figure: Fine. But now the important part! I you meet a kid with a green getup and a fairy, and he wants to get through, you have to stop him. Got it?
Bob: Yes sir!
Shadowy Figure: Good, now get to work.
Bob: Ok boss. By the way, what do we call you?
Shadowy Figure: Boss is fine. But you may call me Lord Ganondorf.
Bob: All right.
Jim: We're getting paid for just sitting here?
Bob: Yeah, it's sorta boring, isn't it.
Jim: You know, this is an amusement park. Why don't we think of something amusing to do?
Bob: Yeah! Like we can be clowns! "The Dancing Lizalfos Bros."!
Jim: Sound good to me! Let's practice!
So they practice for a while, until they hear a noise from outside their room.
Distant Noise: Du du da da du du duuuuuuuuuu!!!!!
Bob: Uh oh! Someone's coming!
Jim: Come on! Let's hide and surprise him!
They find a place up high to hide. Then someone walks into the room. He's a little boy wearing a green hat and tunic, and a fairy is following him.
Boy in Green: Whoa! It's hot in here!
Bob: Hey! He looks like he needs entertaining!
Jim: Ok then! Let's go!
They jump down in front of the boy.
Boy in Green: AHHHHH! What the?
Lizalfos #1: Hai!
Boy in Green: Don't you mean hi?
Lizalfos #1: No, hai! Like in Uruk-hai!
Boy in Green: Oh.
Lizalfos #1: I'm Bob!
Lizalfos #2: And I'm Jim!
Bob & Jim: And we're…(They pull out a couple of fake red noses)…The Dancing Lizalfos Brothers!
They bring out a unicycle, a few dishes and a horn. Bob gets on Jim's shoulders while balancing some plates and Jim rides on the unicycle and honks the horn. They both start singing real bad circus music.
Bob & Jim: Na na ne-ne ne na na, na ,na ,na ne ne ne-ne, na na na na, na na-na na, na…
Boy in Green: Um…hey guys?
Bob and Jim fall over. Sounds of breaking dishes.
Boy in Green: Um, how do I get through there?
He points to a locked door.
Bob (getting up while brushing off dust and glass): Oh! You have to fight us!
Boy in Green: Oh great.
Jim: Yeah, get ready!
They both pull out rubber chickens.
Boy in Green: Um…ok.
He pulls out his sword.
Bob: GOOOOOOOOOO!
The boy pokes Bob.
Bob: Oh no! I'm dead!
He explodes.
The boy then pokes Jim.
Jim: Oh no! I'm dead!
He explodes.
Boy in Green: Oooookaaaay.
He leaves the room.
Bob: Ow!
Jim: Yeah.
Bob: How're we still alive?
Jim: Dunno. Maybe we're immortal!
Bob: Nah. If we were, we wouldn't be in so much pain. But we are still on the job. We'd better go find another place to stay.
Jim: Yeah. And some band-aids!
Along the way, they bump into an old "friend" of theirs.
Jim: AH! It's our cousin Frank!
Bob: Let's just sneak past and maybe he won't-
Frank (who has a deep, nasal, geeky sort of voice): Bob? Jim?
Jim: Uh oh.
Frank: What are you guys doing here?
Bob: We work here Frank.
Frank: You do? I think I do too.
Jim: Oh…that's…great.
Frank: Hey, do you wanna hang out together?
Bob: Um…sorry Frank…we, um…are assigned to a special, "Bob and Jim" only section. We were on our way when we bumped into you.
Frank: Awwww, that's too bad. I get kinda lonely, you know, hanging out here in the dark…with no one around…except old graves…with scary dead people in 'em.
Bob: Sorry! Rules are rules!
Jim: Yeah, so…se ya!
They run off…very quickly.
The boy with the fairy walk into a really hot room full of lava. Then a couple familiar lizard-looking guys fall from the ceiling.
Bob (with an eye patch and a cast over his arm): Hai!
Boy in Green: Oh no. Not you two again.
Jim (holding some crutches with his head all bandaged up): Yep! But this time we're here to arrest you.
Boy in Green: What!?
Bob: Yeah, we're also the "Dodongo's Explosive Cavern's Group of Lizalfos Who Are Trying to Promote the Welfare of the Dodongos". And since you violated law #3-
Boy in Green: What do you mean?
Jim: You fed the Dodongos.
Boy in Green: No I didn't.
Bob: But…you were supposed to.
Boy in Green: Then why am I getting arrested for it?
Jim: Because…oh never mind.
Bob: Anyway, we have to fight!
Boy in Green: Um, guys? Don't you think the odds are against you?
Jim: What do you mean?
Boy in Green: Um…you can't even hold a sword.
Bob: Well, we have to fight, it's our duty as the, "Dodongo's Explosive Cavern's Group of Lizalfos Who Are Trying to Promote the Welfare of the Dodongos".
Jim: Yep! So get ready…
Bob: GOOOOOO!
Boy in Green: *sigh* (pokes Bob.)
Bob: Oh no! I'm dead!
He explodes.
Boy in Green: (pokes Jim.)
Jim: Oh no! I'm…not dead! Hahaha!
He hits the boy in the feet with his crutches but loses his balance and falls into the lava.
Jim: NOOOOOO!
He explodes.
Boy in Green: Ok, that was strange.
Ha walks away, unscathed…again.
Bob: Man, we're really bad fighters!
Jim: You can say that again!
Bob: Man, we're really bad fighters!
Jim: I didn't really mean it.
Bob: Oh.
A loud growling sound comes from Jim's direction.
Jim: Man, I'm hungry!
Bob: Yeah, me too. Hey look! A vending machine!
They go over to it.
Jim: But we don't have any money.
Bob: Hey look! A rupee!
He picks up the blue gem.
Jim: Let's get something.
Bob: Ok! How 'bout the chocolate covered Deku nuts?
Jim: Nah, they're too crunchy. There's the Deku seed popcorn.
Bob: That's not satisfying enough.
Jim: Ooooooo! There's some…
Bob and Jim: MILK!!!!!!!!
They buy the milk, not even thinking that they'll have nothing to eat.
Bob: Oh yum!
They each take turns sipping the milk. After awhile, though, they run out.
Jim: Awwwwww! All gone!
Bob: Man! I'm still hungry!
Jim: Yeah. Me too.
Bob goes over to the vending machine and starts to bang his head against it.
Bob (with each bang): Why-do-you-have-to-take-money!
Then a bag of B-B-Q Cucco wings pop out of the vender.
Bob: Yea! It's a miracle!
Jim: All right!
They start to munch on them. A Dodongo comes over and starts to whine at them with hunger.
Jim: Awwww. Are you hungry too? Here.
He tosses a cucco wing at the Dodongo and it quickly gobbles it up.
Bob: JIM! WHY DID YOU DO THAT!?!
Jim: He was starving!
Bob: But it's against the rules!
Jim: Uh oh.
All of a sudden a shadowy figure appears in a puff of purple smoke.
Ganondorf: You fed the Dodongo's, didn't you.
Jim: *gulp* Y-yeah.
Ganondorf: Well, I'm afraid that, YOU'RE FIRED!
Bob: But he didn't mean to-
Ganondorf: YOU'RE FIRED TOO!
Bob: But, but!
Ganondorf: LEAVE!
Bob: Awwww man!
Jim: What about our money?
Ganondorf starts to fire little lightning balls all over the place.
Jim: AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob: AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Both of them run out of the place as quickly as possible.
Bob: Man! That guy sure was mad!
Jim: Yeah. And we didn't even get the TP money!
Bob: Guess we'd better go find another job.
Jim: But we've tried everywhere!
Bob: Not outside the mountain!
Jim: But Bob, we've never been off the mountain!
Bob: Well, we have to get some TP!
Jim: You're right. Let's go!
(Fellowship Theme)


text:
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text:
purpose of the Foreign Language Club is to give students an opportunity
outside the classroom to learn more about the French and Spanish
cultures. Students will celebrate National French Week and Cinco de
Mayo, among other culturally significant holidays.
goal of the club is to encourage the entire school to appreciate French
and Spanish cultures. The only pre-requisite is that the student must
be currently enrolled in a French or Spanish class or have previously
taken a French or Spanish class.


text:
1995 Toyota Celica Reviews & Ratings
Read real experiences from 1995 Toyota Celica owners like you.
Find ratings and reviews for any car
Displaying all 5 reviewsFilter
1995 Toyota Celica
By on 8/20/13 | New York, NY
I own a 95 convertible 2.2 I've done basic preventive maint.shocks,brakes.cat converter,new top(not basic but someone decided that I needed better air circulation)anyway I keep my car in a garage as I live in the city.I have no dents an I also had outside and inside detailing done.This is my baby,anyway I have one problem,maybe one of you can give me some advice.I recently noticed my check engine light go on,I've checked the basics to no avail,ex:gas cap,fuses hoses etc.any Ideas would be appreciated,Thanks
1995 Toyota Celica
By on 2/28/11 | Lompoc, CA
I bought my 95 celica convertible 5 years ago with 119.000 miles on it. It has 179,000 now and still runs like great. I love this car and was wondering what people thought re: putting money into it to recondition it? New paint job, new top etc. just don't want to do this and then the engine goes. Any comments would be appreciated.
1995 Toyota Celica
By on 6/22/10 | Dixmont, ME
1995 Toyota Celica ST. I LOVE my car and have had it forever. I had to replace some things due to it sitting, but other than that..great. more recently, the ring in the third cylinder went and I needed to replace the engine..boooooo. :(
1995 Toyota Celica
By on 5/26/10 | Middle River, MD
I bought this car one year ago with about 130,000 miles on it. I have had no problems at all. Today I did find a leak in the main oil seal so i'll find out what that'll cost. This car has been great
1995 Toyota Celica
By on 11/10/09 | Killeen, TX
I bought my 1995 Celica less then a year ago, it has 100k miles on it and still ran great. Outside of a tune up I have had no issues out of her. I would not give her up, love the pep the GT model has with only a 1.8 in it
Toyota Celica Reviews by Year
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text: I am using PSP 100 (FAT) already hacked and installed custom firmware. Everything was going fine until 2 or 3 months ago. (I was busy at work so no time to search for solutions). I was planning to put another game to the memory stick. So I will connect it to PC. But on PC it only shows less than 1 mb storage but on the PSP it shows about 2GB (yeah d size sucks). I was planning to buy atleast 16gb if this unit will be fixed. BTW, these are the files in my PC on that PSP shown in Drive G:


text:
Sanctity of the Internet goes down in flames
Related Articles
- The Web's dark side. Zalud, Bill // SDM: Security Distributing & Marketing;Feb98, Vol. 28 Issue 3, p186
Presents information on a study of firms which provide their employees with Internet/Web access, points to a dark side. Statistical information on employees who waste company time surfing the Web for non business reasons.
- The Internet's growth problems. Naldi, Maurizio // Telecommunications - International Edition;Jan1998, Vol. 32 Issue 1, p55
Focuses on the growth problems of the Internet. Impact of Internet on public network services; Intrinsic distributed nature of the Internet; Diffusion data; Alternative strategies to divert Internet traffic.
- On...the...firstname.lastname@example.com. Lam, Shona // CMAJ: Canadian Medical Association Journal;05/15/97, Vol. 156 Issue 10, p1465
Presents advice in conducting Internet searches. Highlights from the web site of the Canadian Medical Association; Recommendation of the web site of the Family Physician Asthma Group of Canada.
- Intranet chic: The enterprise is where it's at. // American Banker;9/16/96 Supplement, Vol. 161 Issue 177, p2A
Focuses on the business possibilities of the Internet. Hype about consumer transactions via networks of personal computers; Group-work collaboration.
- Technology advances require new kind of code of conduct. Vartanian, Thomas P. // American Banker;12/9/96 Supplement, Vol. 161, p11A
Asserts that the Internet has changed many rules of business. Need for business enterprises to adjust written policies; Statement regarding cyberspace access; Contracts between employees and other parties in cyberspace; Security of electronic value; Confidentiality of information.
- Selling on the Internet. Prehn, Eileen // Asian Business Review;Dec96, p43
Reports that global expansion and acceptance of the Internet would have a profound effect on marketing in the Asia Pacific region in the years 1995- 2000. Comments by Bob Wehling, senior vice president of the American Procter & Gamble Company; Six core benefits of marketing online.
- Who will pay for the Internet? // Academe;Jul/Aug94, Vol. 80 Issue 4, p44
Focuses on the commercialization of the Internet. Ethical issues; Implications on publishers.
- Bulletin board. // Advertising Age;11/11/1996, Vol. 67 Issue 46, p46
Presents tidbits related to the Internet. Poppe Tyson as slowing down its initial public offering plans; Amazon.com as seeking new advertising agency; Electric Minds Web site launch with Netscape Communications Corp. and Sun Microsystems as the site's first sponsors; Cyber Promotions' request...
- Surf's up! Drukenbrod, Mark // Paint & Coatings Industry;Oct96, Vol. 12 Issue 10, p60
Presents a discussion on surfing the Internet. Comparison of online services and service providers as the gateway to the Internet; Advice on web navigation; Search engines.
- Adventures in cyberspace. Heresniak, E.J. // Across the Board;Mar1996, Vol. 33 Issue 3, p15
Focuses on Internet computer network addresses. Complexity of electronic mailing addresses; Need to be careful about computer jargon.


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Runtime: 1:26:03
Director: Carl Reiner
Audio: faad, 129 kb / s
Year: 1983
Genre: Comedy
Country: United States
Starring: Steve Martin, Kathleen Turner, David Warner, Paul Benedict, Richard Brestoff, James Cromwell, George Firth, Peter Hobbs, Earl Boen, Bernie Hern, Francis H. McCarthy, William Traylor
The brilliant neurosurgeon Hvahruher, whom he considers himself and professionally organizes PR, invented a new method of operations: a skull without unscrewing the shaving head of hair ... Such an operation he had on his future wife, Dolores. Dolores was still that little thing. Before Hvahruhera she was brought to the grave a few wealthy men. She - a real hunter legacies, to the same - very preoccupied sexual adventures, but not with their husbands ... Order tired Hvahruher with Dolores decides to go on a honeymoon trip to Austria. There he meets an even more lunatic neurosurgeon, who has whole house crammed with jars of human brains ... With UrsaMovie.com you can download The Man with Two Brains free HD movie.