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Lukas creates a complex, moving story with brilliant lyricism and hard won realism. She is a rare writer who makes you devour her words.
Omaha, Nebraska (PRWEB) January 15, 2014
WriteLife LLC, an independent publishing company headquartered in Omaha, NE, announces the January 14th release of Farthest House – a novel written by Margaret Lukas, with rich threads of mysticism, jealous betrayal, and ultimately the healing power of self-forgiveness.
When Willow is born and her mother dies moments later, only the narrator of this spellbinding, debut novel knows the death isn't from complications of childbirth. Amelie-Anaïs, buried on the Nebraska hilltop where the family home resides, tells this story of deceit, survival, and love from beyond the grave. Following Willow's life and her incredible passion to paint despite loneliness, a physical handicap, and being raised by a father plagued with secrets, Amelie-Anaïs weaves together the lives of four enigmatic generations.
"Not since The Lovely Bones have we experienced such a moving tale of love, suspense, and family secrets narrated by a ghost. Lukas creates a complex, moving story with brilliant lyricism and hard won realism. She is a rare writer who makes you devour her words. Readers of Alice Hoffman and Anita Shreve will love this novel...and stay up all night to finish it!"
-Jonis Agee, author of The River Wife, The Weight of Dreams, and South of Resurrection
One of 15 children raised on a farm in central Nebraska, Lukas discovered the joy of writing when she was 12 after reading Charles Dickens' Great Expectations. She would sit in the corner of her bustling household filled with people and try to write her Dickensian novel. "Going into that magical space, the bliss of it, the sacrament of it…what more rewarding life is there than writing? I may have been raised poor, but I'm rich now," Lukas recalls.
Because of how hard she watched her mother work, raising all her siblings on a farm, women's issues are important to Lukas, which she explores in depth in Farthest House. Because she also explores sensitive issues of organized religion, she waited until after her parents passed to write and publish Farthest House.
Taking a non-traditional route to her career, Margaret Lukas started her undergraduate work at 51 years of age. She received her BFA from the University of Nebraska Omaha's (UNO) Writers Workshop in 2004 and her MFA from Rainier Writing Workshop in Tacoma, Washington in 2007. Lukas is a professor in UNO's Creative Writing program. She is a contributor to NEBRASKAland magazine and editor for the quarterly literary journal, Fine Lines. Her writing also appears online and in the 2012 anthology, On Becoming, published by the University of Nebraska Press. Her award-winning short story, "The Yellow Bird," was made into a short film and premiered at the Cannes Film Festival. She is a recipient of a 2009 Nebraska Arts Council Individual Artist fellowship. Farthest House is her first novel.
Farthest House is available on http://www.writelife.com as well as other major online booksellers. The eBook will be available on writelife.com and in Kindle and Nook formats in late January.
About WriteLife, LLC
WriteLife, LLC is an independent publisher offering a uniquely collaborative approach to publishing, marketing and ongoing support to writers serious about their work. WriteLife advances their authors the pre-production and production costs of editing a manuscript; creating a book for publication; and placing it in key distribution channels. Once costs have been recuperated through book sales, each author is paid 50% royalties on every book sold.
Learn more about WriteLife http://www.writelife.com/
Read WriteLife's Blog http://www.writelife.com/blog/
Buy WriteLife Books Online - http://writelife.pinnaclecart.com/index.php?p=home
WriteLife on Twitter - https://twitter.com/WriteLifeLLC
WriteLife on Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/WriteLife?ref=hl


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No 10 brushes off 'Muppet' row
Downing Street has insisted that Britain continues to "work closely" with Germany, amid claims that Chancellor Angela Merkel has lost patience with UK intransigence over the EU and wants to create a "new, more deeply integrated Europe" based around the eurozone.
A spokeswoman for Number 10 brushed aside a commentary in the respected German magazine Der Spiegel which compared Britain to Statler and Waldorf, the two old men on The Muppet Show who continually grumble as spectators in the gallery.
The magazine - often taken as reflecting the views of the German establishment - said that Mrs Merkel wants to push ahead without Britain with measures including a separate budget for the 17 eurozone states and a joint EU headquarters for military missions.
Mrs Merkel had long believed that "the door must be kept open for London" to engage more closely with the EU, but those hopes have now been "dashed" by the approach of David Cameron's administration, said Der Spiegel, which did not identify the sources of its claims.
"The German government is convinced that the euro group will be the core of a new, more deeply integrated Europe," said Der Spiegel."The Cameron administration's unwillingness to compromise leaves the German government with no choice.
"Berlin's official position continues to be that all integration steps must be fundamentally available to all EU members. But in reality, the Chancellor has long since come to terms with the fact that there will no longer be a path back to the centre of the union for the British."
The magazine said that Mrs Merkel's proposal for a separate budget for targeted measures to promote growth in the eurozone is expected to be tabled at Thursday's summit of EU leaders at the European Council.
Asked about the Der Spiegel article, the Downing Street spokeswoman said: "I'm aware of reports and I'm sure you are aware that these comparisons are actually made by a German magazine and not actually by the Chancellor herself.
"The point to make is that we continue to work closely with Germany on a range of issues, from pushing for a realistic EU budget to leading the charge for tighter sanctions on Iran. There will be issues we don't always agree on, but that is why we have constant dialogue and that ensures we both understand our priorities and how we can work together in our national interests."
Asked whether it was right to say that Mr Cameron was not a Muppet, as Der Spiegel suggested, she joked: "I think that's probably a factual statement".

subset: commoncrawl


text: Local government workers strike ballot on 'poverty pay' opens today 11 June 2014 Local government employees, members of Unite, the country's largest union, start voting today (Wednesday 11 June) on possible strike action over the 'insulting' one per cent pay offer. Thousands of ballot papers are dropping on the doormats of members in England, Wales and Northern Ireland over whether they wish to take strike action or industrial action short of a strike after enduring four years of pay cuts in real terms. The ballot closes on Monday 30 June. Unite is seeking a £1-an-hour increase in pay for the local council workforce which has 400,000 employees earning below £15,000 a year and a million earning less than £21,000. Unite won't be balloting its members in Scotland where the devolved administration has agreed to pay the 'living wage' to all council staff. The industrial action ballot follows a consultative ballot where members rejected the pay offer for 2014/15 by a 90 per cent margin. Unite national officer for local government Fiona Farmer said: "Our members have endured four years of pay cuts in real terms and they have now said: 'Enough is enough' to poverty pay. "We are expecting a strong mandate for industrial action which could take place on 10 July. Any industrial action that Unite may take will be coordinated with the other local authority trade unions to achieve maximum impact. "The aim is to get the employers back around the table to negotiate a fair deal for those who deliver vital local government services, from social care to refuse collection, on a daily basis. "Poverty pay is widespread across local councils and we are seeking a £1 an hour increase across the board for local government workers." Unite has about 70,000 members in local government carrying out such jobs as refuse collection, maintenance of council property, traffic enforcement, school support and care services, and grave digging. ENDS For further information please contact Unite senior communications officer Shaun Noble on 07768 693940 Twitter: @unitetheunion Facebook: unitetheunion1 Web: unitetheunion.org Notes to editors • Unite is Britain and Ireland's largest trade union with over 1.4 million members working across all sectors of the economy. The general secretary is Len McCluskey.


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An act of hatred in which the victim has a plastic Play-Doh cookie cutter template Zap-a-Gapped (similar to super glue, but stronger) to his/her anus. The desired effect should be something along the lines of star shaped logs.
To their bewilderment, Pam had fainted in the bathroom and was lying on the ground motionless. The cause of her accident could be found in the toilet bowl: several flower shaped specimens of fecal matter. Pam had stolen Danny's lunch money earlier that day any Danny wanted to get even with her. To make a long story short, Pam was on the receiving end of a historical Play-Doh Surprise.
by Norton ScanPro December 04, 2006
buy the domain for your foodie blog


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The Global Operations team in Washington, DC will act as advisors in organizing your event; however you, as an Ambassador, will ultimately be responsible for organizing and executing your event. You have a lot of independence on the topics and schedule of events. Just keep us in the loop, and the DC staff will support you along the way.
The Global Operations to team is there to answer any questions and help provide you with needed resources and legitimacy. After your event is organized, it will be your responsibility to follow up with your attendees to see how the event was received. YPFP asks that you write a summary of the event and provide us with pictures so we can display your success on the YPFP's many channels.


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I don't buy or collect many radios these days my interest is mainly d/s tv sets. but every now and again a radio will sort of find me..
I bought a rummage box at Cowbit yesterday. I had quickly looked in the box and there were a few bits that interested me so I made a note, 'box of grot £5 ish' on my catalogue. this is so when it comes up I don't get carried away!
Anyway I won it for the maiden bid of a fiver!
When I got it home I went through it to decide what to keep.
Buried at the bottom and none worse for all the dross that was on top of was this little Sony radio. It looked very solid and well made typical Sony build quality for the 1970's. It covers Mw FM and five Sw bands.
Its the same as the one here http://www.shortwaveradio.ch/radio-e/sony-icf7600-e.htm
I put it to one side until I had sorted the rest of the stuff and then tried some batteries in it. at first nothing so I tried spinning the batteries in the holder in case it was a dodgy contact. success ! it spluttered into life. The two wavechange switches needed working a bit before it settled down and worked fully on all wavebands. I would guess it hasn't been used in years.
I spent a hour last night tuning through the shortwave bands hearing all sorts of interesting stations including various "trombone noises" and Morse code enthusiasts..
I am really pleased with my mucky little Sony I will give it a careful clean a little later. The white print looks slightly fragile and it might wipe off without too much effort I won't be bombarding it with foam cleaner!
I have a couple of Sony portable TVs in my collection this will make a nice addition!
I'm really glad I took a punt on the box of grot! You never know what might be buried!


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Reveal a slimmer, toned behind in just 4 weeks with Slendertone Bottom, the discreet body sculptor that uses advanced clinically proven toning technology to exercise the muscles in your bottom, giving you a firmer and more uplifted behind..
The Slendertone Bottom replicates bottom toning exercises, a 30 minute session is as effective as doing 60 reversed leg lifts, proven by experts to be the best exercise to tone, tighten and reshape your bottom. With 4 bottom toning programmes taking you from beginner to advanced, the intensity levels of Slendertone Bottom run from 0-99 for maximum effectiveness. Built-in warm up and cool down phases ensure correct muscle usage while the intelligent training system guides you through the programmes to make Slendertone Bottom the easiest way to tone and lift you derrière.
In independent clinical trials:
- 9 out of 10 users reported an improvement in shape.
- 8 out of 10 users reported their clothes felt looser.
- 7 out of 10 users reported a more uplifted and well-defined bottom.
The Slendertone Bottom garment has been ergonomically designed and incorporates the stimulation area into a comfortable shorts garment, fitting sizes 6-14 (24-38"/61-97cm). The Slendertone Bottom also includes an interchangeable, rechargeable controller designed to work with all garments in the System range for total body toning.


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Stopping Power goes
The $40 million movie stars John Cusack as a test pilot vacationing in Europe with his daughter and girlfriend (Melissa George). Often-evil actor Jason Isaacs steals his RV and kidnaps the youngster, forcing Cusack's hero to commit various villainous deeds and ludicrously high-speed chases (including one "real-time" sequence that will last 50 minutes).The film will shoot in Berlin, where Cusack will steer a vehicle through narrow streets at hazardous speed (but not enough to erase SPEED 2 from memory).
|Extra Tidbit:
|Other films recently filming in Germany's capital are Bryan Singer's VALKYRIE and the Wachowskis' SPEED RACER.


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More details on how Gov. Bobby Jindal's administration would fill a $3.6 billion gap created by eliminating the state's personal income and corporate taxes were explained to legislators on the House Ways and Means Committee Tuesday. As the administration provided lawmakers new details on the proposal, including a draft copy of one of the bills that make up the proposal and specifics about services to be taxed and breaks that would be eliminated, legislators called for a more active effort from the administration to sell the plan to Louisiana residents.
"We need to get the message out there," said committee Chairman Joel Robideaux, who will be carrying the tax bills for the administration.
The proposal is designed to bring the same amount of money into state coffers as it now receives from personal income and corporate taxes, some of which would come from raising the state sales tax from 4 percent to 5.88 percent and by levying an additional $1.05 tax on tobacco products. Lawmakers got new details on how the rest of the shift would play out Tuesday, including more information on exactly how the $1.4 billion in new taxes on dozens of categories of services would be distributed.
Tuesday's meeting was the first detailed committee discussion of the tax plan since it was unveiled last week and part of a series of hearings on the proposal prior to the legislative session, which begins April 8.
Overall, the proposal calls for taxes on 36 different types of services ranging from haircuts to technical consulting. Among the largest areas to be taxed are architectural and engineering services, which are expected to bring in more than $203 million annually, services to building and dwellings, which will net the state $102 million, and management, scientific and consulting services, which would bring in about $93 million.
The plan also calls for raising money through the elimination of tax exemptions, though exactly how much money that will bring in is still unclear.
The Department of Revenue does not individually track the costs for the vast majority of the 76 sales tax exemptions that would be eliminated by the overhaul. Getting rid of the six of those tax exemptions that are tracked, including the state's sales tax holidays for general merchandise, storm supplies and firearms, reduced the amount that residents paid in sales taxes last year by about $10.6 million, according to the state's Tax Exemption Budget.
The more than 190 sales tax exemptions now in place cost the state about $2.4 billion each year.
Among the sales tax breaks that would be cut under the administration's proposal are exemptions for purchases by non-profits such as Habitat for Humanity and the Make it Right Foundation, the purchase and sale of certain items by carnival crews and breaks for some original artwork.
Overall the state has about $6.8 billion in tax breaks on the books, including exemptions for income, corporate and severance taxes. Administration officials have cited the proliferation of breaks, and the complexity they add to the state's tax system, as one of the reasons for moving away from income taxes and toward a less complicated sales tax-based system.
"Why are we increasing the sales tax and not just focusing on those exemptions?" Rep. Major Thibaut, D-New Roads, asked.
Administration officials have said that individual taxpayers in all income brackets would see their taxes cut under the plan. Much of the tax burden would then shift to businesses, Barfield said Monday.
Initial draft of one of the bills in Gov. Bobby Jindal's tax proposal.
In an email Monday, Secretary of Economic Development Stephen Moret said that the proposal, which has been promoted as a way to grow the state's economy, would benefit businesses by making the tax code more transparent and predictable.
"States with simpler tax systems have a big advantage in economic development because corporate site-selection processes focus first on eliminating states based on high-level reviews that rarely consider the full range of available tax exemptions," Moret said.
In addition, Barfield laid out a number of other proposals. The administration plans to institute a tax on "digital goods," such as movies purchased through iTunes. In addition, the administration announced it would ask taxpayers to fill out a yearly form declaring the items they bought over the internet so that they could be taxed on those purchases.
While officials estimated very low compliance with that measure, with an estimate that the plan would only capture about 15 percent of the taxes lost to internet sales, they described it as a bridge to federal legislation that would allow states to more directly collect sales tax on online purchases.
The plan also calls for capping the amount that vendors receive from the state as a reward for collecting sales taxes.
The committee meeting came as Jindal launched a statewide tour promoting the tax plan at a meeting of the South Central Industrial Association in Houma.
Administration officials have been planning a public relations push in favor of the bill and plan to roll out a website in the coming weeks that would allow residents to plug some basic information, such as their income, and get an estimate of how the tax plan would affect the amount of taxes they'll pay. Jindal political consultant Timmy Teepell has also announced plans for a major campaign, similar to the one that surrounded last year's education overhaul, in favor of the proposal.
But Tuesday's meeting also showed early signs of concern among lawmakers about how the proposal would affect specific constituencies who either benefit from tax breaks or else work in services that aren't currently taxed.
Barfield said the revenue department would be working closely with lawmakers to discuss how the proposals would affect specific industries.


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^Full Movie~ Seventh Son ^High Quality~^Watch Movie~ Seventh Son ^High Quality~ ^with duration~ 102 Min ^and~ ^broadcast on~ 2015-02-06 ^and~ ^MPAA rating is~ 26.
- ^Original Title~ : Seventh Son
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Director : Sergey Bodrov, Novel : Joseph Delaney, Screenplay : Max Borenstein, Screenplay : Matt Greenberg, Screenplay : Charles Leavitt, Executive Producer : Maguy R. Cohen, Associate Producer : Martin Cohen, Executive Producer : Alysia Cotter, Associate Producer : Louis Ferrara, Producer : Basil Iwanyk, Executive Producer : Jon Jashni, Executive Producer : Brent O'Connor, Co-Producer : Jillian Share, Producer : Thomas Tull, Producer : Lionel Wigram, Music : Marco Beltrami, Cinematography : Newton Thomas Sigel,
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Community Engagement
The PVC is a university-wide center where students, faculty, and staff engage with the community. Discover service opportunities that are right for you, such as Jumpstart, Step Forward Day, and Project Serve. We also support service-learning and community-engaged scholarship. Learn about the needs of our community and the ways we raise awareness and advocate for community development and social justice.
Calendar of Opportunities
Register for Opportunities
Featured News
Sexual Assault Prevention Week
For the first time, the PVC and the Health and Wellness Center will be hosting a week raising awareness on ways we can all help prevent sexual harassment and assault on our campus.
Pepperdine named in Top 10 of schools for community service
Princeton Review recently ranked Pepperdine as #10 in the nation for "students most engaged in community service." Read more here.
Once again, Pepperdine serves with distinction
Pepperdine University has once again been named to the President's Higher Education Community Service Honor Roll with distinction. This is evidence of the University's commitment to serving our neighbors. To learn more about the Honor Roll, click here.


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How to Organise a Clothes Swap
Getting Started
A clothing swap, clothes trading, or 'swishing' is the next best thing to a shopping exercise – in fact, it's even better as it doesn't damage your financial institution balance and it's a lot more ethical! So get your girls together and organise a guilt-free swishing night for your next social event.
Swishing is the perfect opportunity to remove those clothes you're never going to wear again, get some gorgeous brand new garments, enjoy a evening with friends, and possibly even raise several much-needed cash for a non-profit cause. Here's how it works.
Choose a venue and invite your mates
Decide on how many men and women stone island shadow project mussola gommata you're going to invite. Needless to say the more people a person invite the more outfits everyone will have to select from. Accordingly, you could open it up to friends associated with friends too, yet don't worry if you want to ensure that it stays small – it can even now work with just a few of a person.
What should I bring
The focus is on quality garments : not quantity. Look around in your clothing collection for one or a couple of pieces that are nevertheless in good condition. Don't forget, one woman's trash is the one other woman's treasure, but many of us don't want any lacking buttons or busted zippers. Everything needs to be clean and in excellent.
Decide if you want to open up the swap approximately shoes and add-ons too (we all have any particular one friend with way too many pairs of shoes). And then ask everyone to get a small number of pieces that stone island shadow project mussola gommata will they're happy to part with consequently you'll have plenty of 'stock' for your change. You might even want people to drop their goods off before the function so you can sort them out first, especially if you're expecting a large group.
Set some principles
Decide if you're going to fee an entry charge to the swap. When you're working on a budget and also you're going to provide wine beverage and nibbles, an access fee can be a easy way get everyone in order to pitch in. Or, technology-not only as an opportunity to raise money for charitable organisation.
How your swap functions will depend on the number of guests in. After all, you don't would like any fights over that cute costume that everyone likes! If there's a lot of you, you may want to put a ticket method in place. You could rank the clothes on a colour-coded technique – so a designer hat would be red as well as a high street vest will be green. Each colour is then worth a particular number of 'tickets', which stone island shadow project mussola gommata you matter when people drop off their goods. So if someone gives a designer dress worth 5 tickets, these people get 5 seat tickets to spend. They might employ that on One designer dress, or perhaps 5 one-ticket items, and so on. You could even offer extra tickets.
Otherwise if there's just a few of a person or you don't want to over-complicate that you could just find everyone in as well as go for it! Just make sure swish manners is followed thus everyone gets a opportunity to try on the items that like. You could always have the guests vote on who gets to keep popular items too.
Set a mirror up in the area
Make sure you've got some changing space where people can easily try on the clothes – you don't want anyone proceeding home with items they're never going to wear. The entire point of the swap is to get rid of these. Have a mirror setup so people is able to see how they look and after that let the fun start!
Once the swap has ended and everyone's got some lovely new garments, give them all the option to restore their unclaimed items or donate them to a nearby charity shop. If almost everything goes well, you might want to make a clothes exchange a regular social function, or even host one particular at work with a different group. It's a great way to remodel your wardrobe and assistance a good cause as well!
Have you ever hosted the clothes swap We'd like to hear your some tips in the comments down below.


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ConsumersFind a Dealer
What is the ADA? Caregiver Page Perils of Online Purchasing The Sales Process Appropriateness of the Product Compliance with Industry Standards and Regulations Safely Using the Adapted Vehicle After Sale - Service and Warranty Value Helpful Links
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Recently, I had the opportunity to visit Thekkady, situated in "Gods Own Country", Kerala. It is located near to Kerala-Tamil Nadu border. Thekkady is divided into two parts, the Periyar Tiger Reserve and the zesty town called Kumily. My stay was made affordably comfortable by Vedanta Wake up which is situated in the arms of Mother Nature.
The best part of the Thekkady tour was boating and rafting through the river Periyar which gave me a lot of glimpses of the wild creatures in the Periyar Wildlife Sanctuary. I was smitten by the beauty of the lustrous green foliage, sparkling water of the Periyar Lake and the diversity of birds and beasts therein. Halting at the Elephant Junction was much more fun; I enjoyed bathing the elephants and getting a shower from them as a return gift.
The quaint town of Kumily is cradled within the Cardamom Hills and has tea and spices plantations. I bought variety of teas and spices for myself and as souvenirs for my relatives to make my trip memorable.
After spending two days in Kumily and Periyar Tiger Reserve I moved on to visit the various towns around Thekkady. The town of Murikady offered mind blowing scenic beauty of mist-clad mountains, evergreen valleys and the myriad plantations. Pandizkuzhi is the ideal picnic spot which made me forget the bodily presence by its panoramic landscape, the vivid flora and fauna and the babbling streams flowing through the greens.
My next stop, the Mangala Devi Temple, made me submerge in its elegant Pandian architecture and I simply couldn't help but to fall in love with the ancient historical beauty. The most surprising thing of this temple is that it opens for the devotees only once a year on Chitra Pournami.
The tour to the tiny town of Chellarkovil took away all the travelling exhaustion merely by its magnificence. This mesmerising town is famous for the bewitching green valleys, jabbering mountain brooks and the sparkling waterfalls. The town of Cumbum was the ideal place which took me away from the humdrum of city life. It transformed me into the Nature's lap which was articulated with the flickering sunlight reflecting on the subsiding waterfalls. Next I moved on to Vandiperiyar town which is beautifully painted with the green meadows, hills, evergreen vegetation and varied plantations. The huge Periyar River flows through the heart of the town and enriches the plantations and floral beauty around it.
The next whole day I spent at Gavi, which is a hot spot for ecotourism. This place is blessed with serene forest which marks the untouched beauty of Mother Nature. I went for trekking, enjoyed bird-watching and jeep safari. The boating experience in here is one of its kinds because it took me to another world paving its way through the plantations. Lying back in the boat and enjoying the wild animals in their homeland is only possible at Gavi.
Thekkady was a place in Kerala which I enjoyed the most. An evening walk through the forests was just like a dream come true. With extensive options to stay like budget homestay/hostels and hotels in Thekkady, I will surely revisit Thekkady to re-experience this gorgeous place.


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Miva secure login with Shared SSL - Getting errors when trying to login securely to the Miva admin control panel. However, it's possible to login insecurely.
In order for Miva to work properly with Shared SSL, the following links should be configured:
- "Secure URL to Administration"
Should be set to:
https://<Shared SSL secure domain>/Merchant2/admin.mvc?
For example:
- "Base URL for Graphics" and "Secure Base URL for Graphics"
Both should be set to:
https://<Shared SSL secure domain>/Merchant2/
For example:


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Born This Way is a full pregnancy and birth package for mum and baby. I offer Hypnobirthing using the Wise Hippo Birthing Programme plus Baby and Pregnancy Massage.
Born This Way is available throughout Glasgow, Lanarkshire, Ayrshire and the surrounding areas all within the comfort of your own home.
I'm Lynsey McGillivray and have been running Born This Way since 2012. I live just outside Glasgow and I'm married to Stuart and together we have two children, Jonah and Sofia.
I am a registered midwife and I am obsessed with all things to do with pregnancy, labour, birth and babies. I find the whole thing to be completely mind blowing.
I started my business as I want to make a difference in the lives of couples in order to help prepare for the birth and parenthood in the most calm and relaxed way. I want couples to look forward to the birth rather than dreading a possible painful experience.
I truly believe that preparation makes women trust their bodies and feel in complete control.
I love seeing the difference I can help make to couples and hope to work with you soon.
A Registered Midwife, a Certified Hypnobirthing Practitioner, an HND in Beauty Therapy…
Enough about me! How are you today?
With over six years of Hypnobirthing experience, people have said some lovely things about what I do...
To book either Hypnobirthing, Massage or to come to one of the Born This Way Events, please fill in the contact form


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Program/app development for LIFE COACHING TRADE
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text:
One of the instances of the lagging regions in the European Union is constituted by the Polish province of Podkarpackie. That region is an interesting example of a region with relatively good development bases and quite fast economic growth, which, at the same time, remains in the group of the least developed NUTS2 units in the entire European Union. The reasons for such a situation can be sought in the specific socio-economic features of the area. The internal heterogeneity of the province of Podkarpackie is, as well, not without significance.
The purpose of the presentation is to attempt a comprehensive explanation of the reasons for the economic lagging of the region, with particular consideration of the assessment of activity of the regional and local stakeholders. Taking into account the conditioning, mentioned before, a complementary objective is also constituted by the characterization of the sectoral and spatial structure of the broadly understood economy of Podkarpackie. This will allow for the indication of not only the territories and the branches, which are responsible for the general low level of development, but also of those that are decisive for the high dynamics, observed in the region.
Presentation also will be followed by a short presentation of the international project 'Integrative Mechanisms for Addressing Spatial Justice and Territorial Inequalities in Europe – IMAJINE' (726950), funded by the Horizon 2020 Framework Programme of the European Commission.


text:
Omaha Blast Probe Continues After 2nd Body Found
OSHA Looks Into the Cause of Monday's Explosion, Partial Collapse
OMAHA, Neb.—Local officials here stopped a recovery mission inside an industrial plant that suffered an explosion and partial collapse this week, after a second body was retrieved from the debris and identified.
Police on Wednesday continued to investigate the two deaths from Monday's incident, while the Occupational Safety and Health Administration looked into the cause of the workplace incident. By Wednesday afternoon, two of 10 people initially hospitalized remained in the city's two main hospital networks. Two additional...


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Gossip Girl Recap Recap: Commoner Cop-Out
Who made the best comments on our Reality Index?
This week's episode of The Greatest Show of Our Time brought our characters back to basics with a badass Bass, fairytale-seeking Blair, befuddled Serena, spurned Vanessa and, thankfully, a lonely lonelyboy. All seems to be in place on the Upper East Side, with a handy monitor to remind them not to step out of line (or worse: downtown). When you weren't reveling in Serena's failed attempt at a scheme and Chuck's wallowing debauchery, you were offended by a Waldorf being called a "commoner," Vanessa's return, and Serena's lack of rhombus cleavage. And now, on to quidditch424's recap of the recap.
Realer Than Backstabbing Socialites on the Upper East Side
• There were 15 individual "Gilt" logos shown, plus multiple cutbacks to them, making Gilt appear at least 20 times in this episode. Vanessa appeared TWICE and Jenny was referenced ONCE. +10 for product placement outranking Jenny and Vanessa's characters. —Recklesslyawkies
• +20 for Chuck not hiring an actor to play Raina's mom. Aw. It's like he really liked her. —Lucysage
• +10 for Rufus's face when Serena says CBGB is a clothing store. It's just so clear that he's aware of its transferal as a metaphor for his own life. —Kdow3
• The book Nate is "reading" when he and Chuck talk about finding Raina's mom has blank pages. +5. —imnotfriendswithstaff
• Hmmm ... I think the gag about the sex tape skirt stemmed from the fact that Blair was shopping in Serena's closet, not her own (that ominous ravenscape on the wall behind her means she was in Serena's room). But +5 for hypothetical Chair Coco/Ice T role-play anyway. —jubileejubilee
• +5 for Dorota and Blair's minions' cutesy waves to each other before receiving Queen B's orders. You know the three of them secretly get together to kvetch about being B's bitches. parisgossip
• +100 for the cameras sparkling like stars when Blair and the Prince are kissing in front of the photographers. Glad to have it confirmed that all things are better when making out with royalty. —youngandincorrigible
• When Charlie presents Serena with multiple pieces of potential evidence about Blair and Dan, Serena easily dismisses each of them without a second thought. This is why she is no good at scheming. Real. +5 —chuckismypuppy
• +10 for The Pierces "We Are Stars" playing when Blair and The Prince of Nothing drive away together. Brings back memories from the 1st season cotillion = the golden age of this show! —theunlikelyballerina
• Because isn't that pocket square kept handy to wipe away any evidence from his nose? Chuck is that classy even in debauchery. +10 —chuckismyhomeboy
• After Anne Archibald calls Lily out for being a bitch, Lily proceeds to lure the cops to the party in order to break it up without even considering the fact that this was a fundraising party to benefit breast cancer. Plus a tentative 5 for character consistency. It's not much of a stretch between the selfishness it takes for a person to put an innocent man in jail, and the stopping of a fundraiser to help cure cancer, just because some woman finally brings major uncomfortable truths about your character out in the open. —ohyeahright
• +10 for the Howard Hughes reference. Not only a great line in itself, but it also matches Eleanor's line towards the end of the last season when she referred to Blair's living-in-her-room situation after she broke up with Chuck as "like living with Howard Hughes." Extra points if the writers actually realized they were making yet another connection between Chuck and Blair. —chuckmebass
• Blair says that, now that Louis is in her country, she'll show him the best New York has to offer. Cause that's the extent of Queen B's jurisdiction; nothing else is worth the Prince's time. +2 —signaturescarf
• "Nate: Single malt for breakfast?/Chuck: It takes the edge off the coke."
Bazinga! Coupled with the call to Andrew the PI The return of badass Chuck? + 10" —jnp1013
• Leave it to Nate to act shocked that Chuck is an alcoholic. I'm surprised he doesn't have to write notes all over his body Leonard Shelby style to keep up. +3 —tammyxcore
Faker Than Looking Through Serena's Closet for a Classy Outfit
• Did anyone else notice that after Dan and Blair confront Serena she says her famous, frazzled, "I have to go." But then actually doesn't go anywhere? She just turns around and starts awkwardly riffling through something until Dan is the one who actually leaves. -25 for Serena sucking at life. —MonCheri784
• -50 for Veselka being so empty. That place squashes in every last table so they can stuff the faces of all the city's pierogi eaters. —mimi52000
• How does Charlie even know how to get to Brooklyn, much less where Dan lives? -5. —fromaradio
• According to Rufus, Dan shouldn't give up his lifelong friendship with Vanessa unless he gives it some thought. Perhaps Rufus has forgotten that Dan has actually been reconsidering his friendship with Vanessa since she reappeared in season one. Perhaps Rufus also forgot that she was involved in the social embarrassment, drugging, and kidnapping of his stepdaughter/Dan's stepsister/Dan's on-again-off-again-girlfriend. Let's ignore the near-incestuous connections here and focus on the facts: V. put the nail in she and Dan's coffin herself. -25 for Rufus even suggesting that Vanessa be redeemed. Minus another 10 for the fact that V. is back in the first place.
• Wait, are we expected to believe that Louie and Blair pull up to some random street corner where there are paparazzi already prepared to take impromptu pictures? -15 because Louie is no Angelina, or even Jen for that matter. —schemingwithscones
• -15 for the fact that Blair actually rummaged through SERENA's closet for an outfit for her date with a PRINCE. First of all, Serena is unbelievably tall with very long limbs (oh and let's not forget the cleavage rhombus) and Blair is kidding herself if she thinks anything not remotely skanky would fit her. Secondly, has Blair actually been paying attention to Serena's outfits in the past? The girl doesn't even know the meaning of the phrase less is more, let alone how to dress subtly. —blue_roses
• The whole Lucien thing was so freaking stupid. So he came all the way to New York just to accompany an adult Prince back home, stayed for half an hour until he was convinced of Blair and Dan's love merely by the sight of them holding hands for exactly two seconds and then immediately left for Paris again? That is endlessly more stupid than any character traveling all the way to Brooklyn to tell Dan/Rufus things that would easily fit in a single text message. -5 —applegreen
• Another -10 for Chuck apparently having unsubscribed from Gossip Girl. How else do you explain him not immediately receiving the Dan and Blair video like everyone else at the party?! Did his phone die? Did he see it and not care? For someone who is probably cyber-stalking Blair, he is way out of the loop! —chuckandblairblairandchuck
• "Chuck went through something veeeery similar," Nate explains to Raina. -5, because even Bangs-for-Brains is realizing the absurdity of ridiculous story lines being recycled here. —ninotshka
• No matter how much Blair wants to be a princess she would never tolerate someone calling her "common." -10 because she would have strangled that lispy royal with his own scarf. —wintourwannabe
• The whole "commoner" issue and "royal birthright" obligations are RIDICULOUS, ESPECIALLY in the context of this week's events. The heir to the most prominent European monarchy is marrying a daughter of e-biz entrepreneurs (yup, Wills and Kate), the crown prince of Monaco himself is getting hitched to a pro athlete and daughter of a Zimbabwean computer businessman in just two months! Seriously, how is a WALDORF not an upgrade? Would be -50, but really, -100 because of W&K. —annabelle10021
• -5 Serena is jealous over Dair's secret relationship and she is covering her BOOBS at the PINK PARTY? I know she don't use her brain much but how is she trying to win back Dan with out her rhombus cleavage? —charly777
• Dan tells Vanessa that he had intended to stand her up. PLEASE, and miss the chance to deliver that little comeuppance? He lives for that kind of thing. -3. —emmyloser
• -20 for not letting us see first-hand the 2nd Dan/Blair kiss. If Dan is really in love with Blair, we would have witnessed the dumb post-kiss face he makes when he's infatuated with a girl that is out of his league. —brandie_larue
• Did Blair forget how to walk in high heels? Girl wobbled through Veselka like she'd just finished a three-day slam session with Chuck Bass. -3. —caitybeth


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not so deep thoughts
I've seen a fair number of movies, but I wouldn't say that I'm a connoisseur. I've never seen anything directed by Godard. I'm not really up on famous arthouse directors. I just spend a lot of my time enjoying movies, and a lot of them are indie flicks or foreign films. To people who only watch blockbusters, I might seem like I know a lot about film, but I actually don't know shit. (My first and only date from Match.com tried to have a conversation with me about Fellini and "8 1/2" and it was one of the more painfully awkward conversations in my experience. It's always so sad when people try to impress you with their knowledge of stuff you don't give a shit about.) Movies are just for fun for me.
But there are several films in particular that I'm ashamed to admit that I've never seen. It's a fun question to think about for yourself, and it's a strange thing to be embarrassed about, but I am. When people bring them up, I quietly smile and nod, but I have no idea what the fuck is going on. I wouldn't say that I pretend that I've seen them, but I don't proactively bring up the fact that I haven't. People get really loud and outraged about it. It's frankly amazing that I've lived to be 25 in the environment that I did having never set my eyes on any of them. There are certainly more than the 3 that I'm going to bring up that I haven't seen, but tonight these are the ones that come to mind.
1. Ferris Bueller's Day Off.
I know I've seen scenes from this movie. Sometimes there's a ferrari…..
Ok, no, seriously I've never seen this movie. I'm not even sure I know what it's about. He skips school and borrows a ferarri that he shouldn't. That's all I know. Maybe that's the entire plot? I don't even know whose ferrari it is. There's probably a school principle involved. Or maybe I'm juxtaposing from The Breakfast Club?
This movie is iconic for people in my generation, and they talk about it a lot and quote from it frequently, but somehow I've never had the pleasure of being exposed to it. I think I would watch it if someone brought it over for me, but I'm also afraid that it might be like The Goonies, which I didn't see until I was 21. I think people like The Goonies so much because they loved it as children, but it's a terrible movie to watch for the first time as an adult. It's horrendously bad. This fear of awfulness is what keeps me from seeing Ferris Bueller's Day Off. What if I hate it? I'd rather not know, for the time being.
2. Sleepless in Seattle and You've Got Mail.
Nora Ephron just died, which is what inspired this post because I haven't seen many of her movies. I've entirely missed the onscreen chemistry between Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks with these two films. (She really liked Meg Ryan, eh? It's funny how directors do that. Yeah, I'm talking about you, Tim Burton). These, I think, I would really enjoy, and again, if someone played them for me I would gladly watch them, but I have no desire to seek them out on my own. I've just go this general sense of ennui towards Sleepless in Seattle. (I don't think I'll ever use the word ennui again because it's fucking pretentious. Yuck! I take it back! I've been reading too much Count of Monte Cristo!).
I've never seen the Count of Monte Cristo either, but that doesn't embarrass me, and I'll probably watch it soon. As soon as I finish the book, which is 6 billion pages long.
3. The Big Lebowski
This one is ridiculous considering the number of male friends I've had who have been obsessed with the Cohen brothers. I've seen every other movie by these guys, but never The Big Lebowski. This is probably the movie that I'm the most embarrassed to admit that I've never seen. I know I would like it. I even kind of know the plot. There are white russians and something about carpets? And milk mustaches?
I also had a painful date moment in regards to this movie. I don't know what it is about guys trying to tell me about movies I haven't seen on dates, but it's happened on every single real date I've ever been on. Obviously, I am doing things wrong.
This time I didn't even know I was on a date. We met for coffee, but then he was "hungry" so we went for Thai food instead, and then he paid for it, and then I realized I was on a date. Tricky. And he spent probably 5 full minutes trying to explain something about milk mustaches, even though I'd said I hadn't seen it. He insisted on quoting and explaining the whole set up to me, all the while laughing and laughing. It was…ineffectual.
I still want to see the movie. Just not with him.
Those are mine. What are yours?
Lynsey tagged me in this, it's hot as fuck right now, I'm sitting in my underpants with nothing better to do, and so here are my responses.
1. Post these rules.
2. Post a photo of your favorite book cover.
3. Answer the questions below.
4. Tag a few people to pass the Q&A on to.
My favorite book cover: Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein. I loved these poems and I loved the illustrations. Cover is no exception.
What are you reading right now?
The O. Henry Prize stories from 2010 and The Cookbook Collector by Allegra Goodman. The Cookbook Collector is not good. It's a modern retelling of Austen's Sense and Sensibility. I don't like Sense and Sensibility to begin with, so I don't know why I thought I would like a retelling.
Do you have any idea what you'll read when you're done with that?
I'm waiting on a lot of digital books from the library. Whichever comes in first, which will probably be Looking for Alaska by John Green
What 5 books have you always wanted to read but haven't got around to?
When I want to read something, I read it. I don't have any books waiting on the back burner.
What magazines do you have in your bathroom/lounge right now?
I don't read while I poop. It's much less comfortable than other places one could be reading. If I did have a magazine in there, it would be The New Yorker.
What's the worst book you've ever read?
What book seems really popular but you actually hated?
What's the one book you always recommend to just about everyone?
The Harry Potter series. It's an epic story with such rich and complex characters. I think everyone can be entertained by it and I find it ridiculously enthralling. I once had a friend try to tell me that she hated Harry Potter because all the characters were one-dimensional. I think she'd only seen a movie. Or maybe she's just an idiot.
What are your 3 favorite poems?
This question is not fair and is impossible for me to answer. Why only three? I'm listing 11. A nice odd number. Nowhere near the number that I would like to list, but I guess I have to wait for a poetry meme.
Where do you usually get your books?
From the library. If I love it so much that I need to own it, I'll download it to my kindle.
Where do you usually read your books?
On my kindle. On the couch in my living room. I don't sleep very well, so I reserve my bed for sleeping purposes only.
When you were little, did you have any particular reading habits?
What's the last thing you stayed up half the night reading because it was so good you couldn't put it down?
I stay up late reading books every time I get into the story. I constantly fuck my sleep schedule up because of books; it's what I've always done. Add that to my peculiar childhood reading habits. The most recent time was for The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
Have you ever "faked" reading a book?
Nah, I admit when I haven't read or finished a book.
Have you ever bought a book just because you liked the cover?
That's the only way that I choose books from the library. But I generally don't buy books unless I've already read them and loved them.
What was your favorite book when you were a child?
The Dark is Rising by Susan Cooper. This is the book that got me into reading in the 2nd grade. It was my gateway drug to reading.The librarian, who was just somebody's mom who volunteered in the library, wouldn't let me check it out. She said, "This book looks a little too tough for you, why don't you try reading something else?" Which pissed me off, even at age eight.
Bitch, please, don't tell me what I can or can't read. [Of course it was a little too difficult for me]. Nonetheless I loved it to death.
It's an epic battle between forces of good and evil with an 11 year old boy as the protagonist. He develops powers on his 11th birthday. Can't think of why it sounds so weirdly familiar……
It hurts my soul that they made such a ridiculously awful movie out of it. I don't think it even got released in the U.S., praise the lord.
What book changed your life?
The Dark is Rising, for the reasons stated above, and probably The Fountainhead, which I read at a very impressionable age. Undoubtedly, I was an insufferable asshole for a while as a result, but it's an important book in the formation of my ideas about a lot of things, either in agreement or opposition.
What is your favorite passage from a book?
This is from Night of The Avenging Blowfish by John Welter
I felt exhausted and anxious, which could have been symptoms of some new and culturally fashionable disorder called chronic white guy's syndrome, or whining fatigue syndrome. It was in the newspapers and on TV, some recently discovered disorder where white people in their mid-twenties and thirties exhibited symptoms of just generally feeling like shit all the time, although shit wasn't the precise medical term. It had the word "syndrome" in it, so all you had to do was randomly add some adjectives or adverbs to it and there you were with a puzzling and ominous new syndrome such as "being alive syndrome," which was what I thought I suffered from.
I could use my medical insurance to go to the doctor and say, "Every day I wake up with the same frightening condition."
"And what's that?"
Even the Bible announced in the first book that the first thing you could expect in life was trouble, followed immediately by sorrow, and concluding in death. None of this would have mattered except for consciousness. That's what Adam and Eve got when they ate the apple. So that was my disorder—being aware of my life. And when you fell into the blessed forgetfulness of sleep, it didn't last. You had to wake up. It was odd that while the Bible said sleep was blessed, it didn't say the same thing about being awake.
On the notepad on my lap, I started writing a list that I titled "Things That Are Wrong With My Life," as if by listing my major flaws and problems, I might get a pathetically vague insight into how to live well.
Who are your top five favorite authors?
In alphabetical order:
1. Jane Austen
2. Jonathan Safran Foer
3. Neil Gaiman
4. David Sedaris
5. Kurt Vonnegut
What book has no one heard about but should read?
Night of the Avenging Blowfish. It's absurdly funny. Also sad and ironic. But always hilarious.
What are your favorite books by a first-time author?
To Kill a Mockingbird, Everything is Illuminated, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Harry Potter
What 3 books are you an "evangelist" for?
Harry Potter, Cat's Cradle, and probably The Fountainhead or Atlas Shrugged.
What is your favorite classic book?
Persuasion by Jane Austen.
I've always liked the retelling of old stories. There's an art to taking the essential themes of a story and fitting them into a new time or a new setting. No narrative does complete justice to every character, and I love modern adaptations, or spin-offs from the original work, because they give the reader a chance to learn about and experience the characters more. Everyone knows Mr. Rochester had his batshit crazy wife living up in the attic, but who the heck was she and where did she come from?!? This is barely addressed in Jane Eyre, and that's exactly what makes Wide Sargasso Sea such a cool book. Wives-in-the-attic always deserve their own narrative, as far as I'm concerned.
I'll admit that I'm a fan of just about every modern movie adaptation of Shakespeare [You should admit it, too. She's the Man is a funnier movie than one would have any right to expect.] I like Austen adaptations as well. Clueless is amazing in its own right, but to top that, the movie is such an imaginative way to redo Emma. I didn't even know it was based on an Austen novel until I was in high school, but it's a blatant retelling. And despite being a little inane, the movie still manages to highlight the rigid rules surrounding social class structure, which is the important theme running through the novel.
I think these retellings work because the original story and characters were so phenomenal to begin with. I will always be impressed by how clearly Jane Austen saw people. [At least people of a certain social class and breeding]. She never married, spent most of her short life in the same small town, surrounded by the same people day-in and out, and yet she provided such rich, deeply psychological portrayals of human beings, their motives and their feelings.
And I think you can lump fairy tales in with this literature; in any case, I have a special fondness for them so I consider them to be literature. I don't know specifically where my interest in the genre came from. I think I might just have a general bent toward fantasy. But fairy tales have all those archetypal characters and story lines. Plus, they're fascinating with all the incest and murder, gore, brutality, magic and sorcery. There are some really haunting images from fairy tales.
In Donkeyskin, the king wants to marry his own daughter. He's willing to kill his favorite pet and have its skin turned into a dress for her. That's how much he wants to bang his own daughter. Disney doesn't do them the justice they deserve, and I think their version of the tales might do more harm than anything else.
But the original fairy tales were meant to be lessons. Be docile. Be an obedient child and wife. Don't question, don't think, & don't snoop in your husband's shit. Be happy with your meager life and don't be greedy.
I read a book of retold fairy tales when I was in high school, and I still think it's one of the most interesting and best written books of short stories that I've read. It was Kissing the Witch, by Emma Donoghue, and it had a serious influence on my desire to write and my conceptualization of how short stories should be told. [She also wrote Room, which has been getting a lot of buzz lately. If you recognize her name, that's probably why.]
The stories in Kissing the Witch are all the familiar ones, Donkeyskin, the Little Mermaid, Snow White, but they are decidedly twisted. The heroines leave the princes and decide they want something else, something better instead. Or the evil step mom turns out to have her own horrible story, her own fairy tale which explains everything.
Every single story in the book is connected seamlessly to the story before it and the story that follows. It's a seriously impressive little book. They're beautiful and weird, sometimes subtly erotic, often sad. The book is well crafted. I wish I had thought of something even half as clever.
When I went to undergrad, my first year seminar was called Telling Stories [and it was with Mimi, for anyone who understands what that means.] The class was all about narratives in our lives and all of the different shapes they can take. We often focused on fairy tales. You could do anything for the final class project, as long as it somehow related to narratives, and so I wrote a short story, which was heavily influenced by Kissing the Witch.
I deleted the story after that semester, or maybe I lost it when I moved from my desktop to a laptop my sophomore year. In any case, I remember thinking it was good, and I'm sad to no longer have it. From what I remember, I had Cinderella or someone similar as the heroine, finding out that Prince Charming isn't so charming after all, and he doesn't want her to have a job or work. He wants a caricature of a wife, not an actual woman. So she leaves him and wanders into an inn in another town where there's a whole table of heroines from other tales discussing their stories and how their happy endings weren't so happy either. She joins the table and they all get drunk. I liked the story. I liked writing it. I did not like having to read it aloud to the class.
I remember it being a really not-enjoyable experience for me. I don't like sharing my writing with people, especially not a whole group of people who couldn't possibly have been more apathetic about it. I am a very nerdy lady, and I fully admit that, but having to read a fairy tale I wrote to a class of 18 year old boys seemed dorkier than I could really deal with, psychologically. But Mimi loved it. She raved, and I got an A in the class even though I'd skipped at least one day a week for the entire semester. [It was a 9 Am class. I liked to sleep.]
Recently, I came across a new book of collected fairy tales. There aren't enough of these, in my opinion, so I'm always happy to find when a new one is published. The title sucked me in within the second that I saw it.
My Mother she killed me, My father he ate me: Forty new fairy tales. The title comes from an old fairy tale called The Juniper Tree, which I think was written by H.C. Anderson. The title is essentially what happens in the story, except a creepyass juniper tree brings the kid back to life in the end. Some of the stories in this book are new interpretations of old tales, and some are translations from Russian, African, or Japanese fairy tales.
The stories were scary, sexy, moving, provocative. The book is psychologically fascinating, which is always a plus for me. Sometimes it was difficult to guess which fairy tale was being retold, but what I liked the best was that the stories had the author's commentary at the end: their inspiration to write the story, what they were attempting to accomplish with it, etc.
Many of the stories in this edition are by really well-known authors. All of them seem to share a strong interest in the genre, which makes me wonder if writers are all the same. Some of them, like Neil Gaiman and Joyce Carol Oates, you would expect to be writing weird adapted versions of fairy tales. But all of the stories were excellent.
If you have the time and want to read some creepy, scary, sexy stories, this is your book.
I'm weirdly obsessed with my itunes play count, which is strange because there are very few things in this world that I am anal about. When I hang up pictures, usually they're not even and they end up hanging at a tilt. If it's a group of frames, they all end up slightly off. I eat food that I drop on the floor or food that's slightly expired or has been sitting out for a while. [It's good to introduce foreign antibodies into your system. Erinellis taught me that once when she was blackout.] I turn in papers late all the time; professors give me a deadline, and then I usually end up turning them in approximately a month later. Or sometimes it's a year. Whatever.
The point is that I'm as opposite from anxious, Type A as you can get. But I have an obsession with my play count. If I listen to a song, it has to make the counter go up by one. I end up doing this manually a lot of the time, which takes a lot of effort for the number of songs that I have. Sometimes I'll adjust the play count even if I hear the song on the radio or at a friend's house.I know it's excessive, but it's what I do.
I think it all stems from the fact that I want the play count to reflect how much I like the song so that I can organize my music by how much I enjoy it. Obviously, I've put more thought into my itunes than pretty much every other human being on this earth, but it is what it is. It's incredibly handy to have all the songs I like the best grouped together, that's all I can say.
Today I found this itunes meme that I thought seemed fun and tricky. The rules:
1. Put your itunes on shuffle.
2. Take the first line from the first 30 songs that play. You can't skip songs. [But I had to because several songs with no words came up, which hardly seemed fair.]
3. People guess what the songs are. You can't google the lyrics.
4. I guess I'm then supposed to bold out the ones that people guess,and put the answer, but I doubt anyone is actually going to play.
I find this game to be very enjoyable. It taps into my desire to constantly post bits of song lyrics, which I refrain from doing much more often than I would like, seeing as twitter is such a good platform for it.
If I'd been allowed to pick the songs, none of these would have made the list. I'm not sure I would even be able to guess some of them, and it's my music. Some of them are easy peasy. My apologies for the French one, but it's a good song.
My mother is forever telling me about how lucky I am, and usually it pisses me off to an enormous degree because the things she's referring to aren't luck but involve this huge amount effort on my part. For example, when I was accepted to grad school with free tuition and a 5 year stipend, that was, according to her, incredibly lucky. And while I fully admit that it's a fortunate circumstance that not many people experience, it wasn't fucking luck that I got in. [Fucking luck—say it out loud. It rolls nicely off the tongue.]
However, I was fucking lucky—there are no other words for it—on Friday night because I missed this terrible episode at work by a grand total of 30 seconds.
I do HR/accounting work for an enormous corporation, and one day I will write more about my exploits there, but tonight is not the night.
I was doing the training session for a woman who just started work. Friday was her first evening. And something was off about her. Human communication is so subtle and intricate, but somehow I only ever think about that when I see someone doing it wrong. The best I can describe it is that Suzanne takes slightly too long to respond. I would say a sentence and she would wait a beat, and then another, and then another, and then respond. English is her first language, so it isn't a translation issue. Or maybe it is. I guess I don't know. But it's unnerving, having someone look at you without speaking, all fidgety, after every sentence you say. But I pegged her as being a nervous lady and left it at that.
Suzanne finished her training and then went out to start her shift. I didn't interact with her for the rest of the night, but I clocked out at 9:00 and said goodbye to her on my way out of the building. And that was the end of my night, though it wasn't the end of Suzanne's. Had I dicked around the office before I left, sent some texts or ate a piece of candy, I would have landed right in the middle of a veritable shit storm. Instead, I was on my merry little way out the doors and goodbye.
Suzanne tried to clock out as well, but couldn't remember how to do it, so she asked another employee, Sylvia, for help. Sylvia is short, and she wears very nice suits every time she works. She has some form of mental retardation, but she is highly functional. As a side note, she also shaves her eyebrows and then pencils skinny black lines where they should be.
I just don't know about that. It's frightening, to be honest. However, Sylvia is kind and sweet, so no one talks about her eyebrows. I find it interesting about myself that kindness works as a buffer against ridicule. If someone is a nice human being, I won't make fun of them, no matter what they have going on. I find that I make fun of people who are mean and cruel, almost exclusively, and usually about their physical appearance. "Look at her weird face. She is a mega bitch."
Suzanne asked Sylvia to show her how to clock out, and then fainted onto Sylvia, who didn't understand why this tall blond woman had suddenly started leaning on her. Sylvia backed away, and Suzanne fell like a motherfucking elephant, hitting her head on numerous surfaces and busting her lip open. At this point, Sylvia began running wildly in circles, hollering "Aaah! Aaah! Aaaaaaaah!" , which was enough to catch just about everyone's attention.
Suzanne began seizing, blood everywhere from her lip. Another employee held her head so she wouldn't hit it on the ground and the manager called the paramedics. What an awful, ghastly scene, right? Except it gets weirder and worse. Suzanne came around, but it was her first day of work—she didn't know or recognize anyone—and she was surrounded by a circle of people in full black attire. She started to attack the person who was holding her head, yelling, "Who the fuck are you? Get the fuck OFF of me", then trying to fight her off with her bloody hands and bloody hair and bloody face.
When the paramedics came, she couldn't remember her name or where she was. When they asked her how old she was, she said 30. [She's not 30]. She hit her head multiple times when she fell and when she started seizing, so the confusion and disorientation were not surprising. I'm always astounded by how fragile the brain is and how fragile we are as humans. Cartoons and movies make it seem like we can withstand much more than we actually can. All it takes is one little knock on the head in the right location.
They took her away, and her car has been in the parking lot ever since. From what I heard, Suzanne has a full time job as well. She didn't eat on Friday at her full time job, and then she came to work her part time job and didn't eat either, and at 9:00 her body said, 'I quit, asshole. You didn't feed me.'
30 seconds.
30 seconds was the difference between me driving away in my car and Suzanne falling on me instead of Sylvia. [Although I imagine that I wouldn't have let her fall or ran around like a half dead chicken while she seized on the floor. But one never knows.]
So, all right mom. It is Mother's day, and I will let you have this one. That was dumb luck.
I think to myself pretty often about dropping out of graduate school. There are times when I mean it more seriously than others—times where I've actually started the job search—but it's a more or less constant thought of mine. I picture going to do data analysis for some giant, soulless corporation instead of the giant, soulless University system that I currently do research for. '$50,000', I think to myself. 'Woweee'. [This is how much money I make in my fantasy world. It's not all that great of a fantasy, but somehow it's still better than grad school].
It's been on my mind lately because I'm not really sure how I'm going to pay my July rent this summer. Also, it would be incredibly easy to quit. I do data analysis all day already, so in my head the only difference is that it's someone else's data now. Data about the company's energy consumption or a profit projection or some such nonsense. I wouldn't care what the numbers were about because I would have a 9-5 job with weekends and evenings free. And I would have no soul, probably. And no intellectual stimulation.
But it's difficult to think about intellectual stimulation when I need a new washer and dryer, and when I want frames for all of my paintings and posters, and when I want a window air conditioning unit for my bedroom because I live above a garage and I'm going to boil like a lobster this summer. It's difficult because I am so tired of being so fucking poor.
I never do it though. I don't quit; I keep doing research and teaching and I slide a little bit more into debt every month. I think it must be because I love what I'm researching, and somehow it turns out that the intellectual stimulation is worth more than my image of all the money I could have and the debt I could be paying off and the clothes I could be washing in my front-loading washer and dryer.
Because, to tell you the truth, I'm doing the coolest research. I study autobiographical memory–the memories that we have and share about ourselves. Why do we have a memory system that allows us to recall past, personal events so vividly, and for what purpose? And I'm about to start a study and collect massive amounts of data, which mostly involves meeting with old people and having them tell me their life histories.
And old people are so cool. Beneath all that wrinkly, papery skin and liver spots are people who lived through the most amazing shit. Interviewing them is like talking to secret agents. They all have these pasts that you could never have guessed from their appearances. They were young, and some of them were gorgeous, and they had these vibrant lives.
I did my first interview the other week, and the woman I was interviewing said probably the wisest thing I've ever heard anyone say in real life. And she was so offhand about it. I don't think she had any idea that she was dropping a knowledge bomb on me. I can't quote her directly for ethical reasons, but she was reviewing her life and we were almost done with the interview and she said, [sort of]
"I have these threads running through my life that have come together in completely unexpected ways. They all braided together and worked out, and I never could have imagined that happening." And then she looked at me all old and smug and knowing and said, "When I was your age, I had all these ideas about how I had to make everything work. I had all those threads in my hands and it was up to me to make all these different threads of relationships and ambitions and hopes all come together correctly. And it does take a little effort, but mostly everything just ends up coming together on its own, without you having to do anything."
Like life would be better once you let go of the reins. And I've thought about her saying that ever since. I can see her point; even at 24 I know that she's right. I've had friendships that went south, injustices, embarrassments, fears, a boy I thought I would never get over—that I was going to be bitter and sad about forever—and without me doing much of anything except living, it all just panned out. And I'm not bitter, and I'm not sad, and the friendships that went south…came back north? They worked out fine, too. All of those threads braided together and came out with a pretty little pattern in the end. [Or in the beginning of the middle, I guess. 24 had better not be the end].
I think there's a freedom in thinking about things from that perspective. And this lady's life was not great; she had some big shit go down in her life, and despite that, the message was still that miserable things can happen, but even they work out somehow. I don't know if it's possible to think about things that way in the moment, but it sure would be helpful if we could. What a useful way to get your head out of drama. We get so wound up in things; our small dramas become the center of the fucking universe and I think we would all be a little cooler if we could think about how much things actually matter. Because some things do. They really do. But so many things don't, and I feel like we can't distinguish between the two most of the time.
Or maybe we can't live in that way. Maybe you have to be almost 70 to have any kind of grace about human interactions.
I'm planning to do about 40 more interviews, and maybe I'll end up being really wise. But probably not so much.
The other project I'm working on is about vicarious memories—memories that other people have told you, and you weren't there, but you can picture the memory as vividly as if it were your own. For example, while parking his car, this guy I used to know lightly bumped into the curb and it caused the airbag to pop out and smack him in the face, even though he just sitting there, parked. And there were people all over the parking lot who witnessed it. I wasn't there, but I can picture it like I was.
I know that people can do this easily for their friends, but I'm curious about whether people can do this for their parents or for their children, and what kinds of memories people come up with if they can. I was quizzing my mom about this, to see if she could come up with any, and she gave me possibly the funniest story I've heard about my maternal grandmother.
Mamaw, as I knew her, was fat, and she always wore these sleeveless vests as shirts and her boobs were just enormous, so she's just this very fleshy kind of person in my memory. She had cataracts, and so she also always had on a visor–like the green visor that people wear when they're dealing poker in the 1960's.
And she was loud and she lumbered around everywhere just talking and talking and talking. [When I was a small child, I used to talk so much—just this nonstop toddler monologue—that my mother taped my hands together. I got so interested in getting my hands free that I shut-up. So the talking gene is from that side of the family and it terrifies me that I will one day also be lumbering around in sleeveless vests and green visors]. Mamaw worked a factory job, which, from personal experience, is the perfect occupation for someone who likes to gab. And this woman was always late. Every day she would have to run into work; she'd sprint to the punch clock in order to make it on time, and all the other factory girls would heckle and cheer as she ran to make it.
But in this memory that my mom gave me, Mamaw was a child. It is so difficult to think of your grandparents as children. I end up with a fat, vest-wearing little girl in my head, even though I know that's wrong. Mamaw lived with her parents and grandparents, and the grandparents were fresh off the boat from Germany and very stoic and solemn and German, apparently. Only German was allowed to be spoken at the dinner table and it was this very serious dining affair. Not the kind of situation that children do well in, and especially not my grandmother.
They ate this thick, dark German bread for dinner and Mamaw hated the crusts. She would pick out the soft insides, roll it up into tiny balls, and then finally eat it. She made such a production out of eating the bread that the rest of the family had cleared from the table when she was done. And when no one was looking, Mamaw would take her bread crusts that she didn't want to eat and stuff them under the tablecloth in between the leaves of the table, in the cracks. And she did that for a long time, so there were many, many dinner's worth of crusts in between those table leaves.
One day, my great-grandmother went to dust the table or add another leaf and out fell 50 stale, half eaten old bread crusts from in between all the cracks in the leaves where Mamaw had shoved them.
This happened about 90 years ago, but I can picture it so, so clearly. I have no idea what they were wearing or what the room looked like. But I can just see the expression on my great-grandmother's face as all the bread crusts fall out from the table, and how much trouble Mamaw probably got in, and even her expression when my great grandmother confronts her about the crusts, like "Vera! Did you do this? Did you stick all these crusts in the table?" only in German and Mamaw being like "Nein. Never seen those before." Just lying and probably getting smacked in the face for it.
But I see it. Across 3 generations and about 90 years.
And I guess this is the whole reason that I don't think I'll drop out of school and make money crunching numbers for some company. Because, although I am dirt poor and will continue to be for at least two more years, I get to hear the most interesting stories all day, every day.
I love reading. I know everyone lists reading as one of their interests and it's a common thing for people to say that they love, and so I either love it in exactly the same way as everyone else, or when I say I love reading, I really mean it, and I mean it in a way far and above just listing it as something that I do because I couldn't think of anything else of interest to put on my facebook page.
As a kid, I did other things, too. I played soccer and the clarinet. After school, I would spend hours at my friend's house doing god knows what: nothing singular comes to mind. I think I must have done my homework during class when we were supposed to be listening, or otherwise I didn't have homework because as soon as soccer practice was over and my clarinet lessons were done and I was back home finishing dinner and grudgingly putting the dishes away, my mind was on reading. It was that thing—the thing I waited all day to get to, the thing that I would choose to do above all other things, the thing that made me hate any and all chores that I had to do because they took away from my books.
My mom would ask me to do things for her, put away the dishes, fold laundry, vacuum the living room, and I would oh-so-cleverly tell her that I would get to it as soon as I finished the chapter I was on. Then I would read 4 or 5 more chapters—as many as I could get to before I heard her coming back to yell at me. I assumed she thought I was a much slower reader than I was, but now I know she was probably just humoring me. She knew exactly what I was doing. And how do you tell a kid to stop reading?
I recently joined a website called Goodreads, and it was nostalgic listing and rating all the books I read in my childhood and adult life. I quickly came to the realization that I could spend 6 hours on that website trying to list and find all the books I read as a child and it would never be enough time. I honestly have no idea how many books I've read, but it's a stupidly huge number. I used to read a new book every two to three days. I was that kid leaving the library with a bigass canvas bag packed with 20 books, hoping it would last me until the next time my mom would take me to the library.
We lived a few miles away from the library in my hometown, and I refused to ride my bike there as a child because there was a portion of the trip where the sidewalk curved around a small cliff. There wasn't a guardrail and I was terrified of falling off my bike and down the cliff. I wasn't all that great at riding my bike anyway, so this obstacle, though far fetched, was insurmountable. So in the summer, my amazing sister would walk with me the whole trip to the library. We would stop at the store on the way and I would get a chocolate Yoo-hoo and she would get one of those flavored Crystal Light drinks. Those trips are easily some of my favorite memories of all childhood.
I was non-discriminant in my books, although I did have my preferred genres, of course. Horror books were the best, for a long time. R.L. Stine and Christopher Pike especially, but if it was YA and made any attempt to be terrifying, I was into it. Epic fantasy stories caught my fancy, too. The Prydain Chronicles, A Wrinkle in Time, The Dark is Rising series, Harry Potter. [I can't explain how angry I was when I figured out that my magical powers weren't ever going to develop.] I also had a thing for the Newbery medal books. Holes, Ella Enchanted, The Midwife's Apprentince, Walk Two Moons, Catherine Called Birdy, Number the Stars, The Giver, Hatchet, Jacob Have I Loved….all those good books plus a billion more.
So I think this is the reason why I hate Twilight so goddamn much. Because most YA literature is actually literature and Twilight is a piece of crap that 12 year old idiots laud as the best book of all time. They're young so I can understand, kind of. I don't want to think about the adults who love Twilight. I get the entertainment value inherent in trashy TV, and trashy books can be entertaining as well, but jesus christ, don't tell me it's your favorite book.
Because Twilight is bad. It's really bad. Like typos and grammar errors bad. And I don't even blame Stephanie Meyer for this because typos are the bane of all writers' existences. I'm sure there are typos galore in my posts. So I blame her editor, or rather the fact that no one appears to have edited her books for her. Where were the editors? Where were they?
Why did no one have a conversation with her like, 'Hey Stephanie, when you're talking about dust, it's 'motes', not 'moats'. And why don't you try a different word besides smoldering? It's a little cliche. And hey, I've noticed you've talked about Edward having white skin a few times already—how about pointing out some other characteristics? Yeah…but not his smoldering eyes…maybe try something other than the fact that he has white skin and smoldering eyes; I think people got that already. And actually, why don't you develop all of your characters a little bit more? You say Bella is clumsy—maybe you should show it instead of just talking about it. That's good writing, right? Show; don't tell? And hey, maybe consider rethinking her major character points. Do young women really need to read about a weak, clumsy heroine who falls apart without a man in her life? Kinda anti-feminist, don't cha think?'
Why didn't this conversation happen? Twilight could have been good. The story has tremendous potential which is squandered in the crap writing and character development. Lynsey posted this link in her 'Things I Love' Thursday post and it's pretty hilarious and accurate. Because by any other author, Twilight sounds like a pretty kick ass book.
For a long time now, I've been avoiding all hyped-up YA books because I can't read anything else like Twilight ever again until I have dementia.
Enter The Hunger Games. This book isn't new, and I've been actively avoiding it for about 4 years because so many people liked it. And that's a pretty telling personality trait, isn't it? If other people really like something, I try to avoid it. (Until NPR and my older sister tell me to check it out, as both are excellent sources of stuff-I-will-like.) So I read the series a few weeks ago, (1150 words later, and I'm finally getting to what I meant to write this post about, yikes) and it reminded me why I like YA lit so much.
The books aren't perfect, but the writing is good. They're wildly entertaining and suspenseful. I read all three within a few days. The political backdrop of the story is one of the more interesting aspects. It's a YA book, so we don't get the full history, but the post-apocalyptic, fascist regime is the perfect setting for this kind of dark, bloody story. Collins wrote the books in the first person, which is the one tense I find impossible to write fiction in, and thus I admire any authors that can pull it off. The novel requires it, as the main character does a number of horrible things which only make sense if you're privy to her inner thoughts, as we are. Katniss is only likeable because the audience knows how much she hates the things she has to do.
And Katniss is a badass lady. No misogynistic undertones in this book. She shoots animals through the eyeballs, kills unflinchingly when necessary, blows up shit, and carries out insane political assassinations. She also becomes incredibly psychologically damaged as a result, which is one of the better aspects of the book.
I killed two lobsters recently and it was pretty damaging to my psyche, so I can't imagine killing people—a ridiculously large number of people—without losing all my marbles. Katniss begins the books as a relatively normal 16 year old and ends, unrecognizably, as a completely different person with an appropriate amount of PTSD symptoms. I like that Katniss is flawed. She's manipulative and bitter, even at the beginning. She holds grudges and she can be cruel. She's also any number of good things: brave, strong, fierce, compassionate.
What I dislike about The Hunger Games is the main male character. He's annoyingly good. Too good and too one sided. The only time I like him is when he gets brainwashed into being a psychotic, sociopathic bastard, but even then he snaps out of it and becomes a good person again. Lame. I wish Collins had given as much dimension to Peeta as she did to Katniss. The story deserves it.
The movie is coming out soon, and I can't wait to see what they do with it. How are they possibly going to show all of the things that happen with a PG-13 rating? I think the movie will be a big hit, even if they only remotely follow the plot. The book taps into all the things we like as human beings: arena-style death-matches, fashion, love triangles, and food—oh-so-much-food. The movie will only have to hit a few of those in order for it to be good. I'd personally be set if it were just the death matches and the fashion.


text:
In an attempt to revamp/reramp this blog, I'll be participating in Writing 101. Hello!
This is my 20 minute free-write. Honest.
Isla is down for her afternoon power-nap. So I thought I'd write. 9 months ago, I thought I'd use her naps to write more often. In truth, she naps and I wait for her to wake up. Or I look at her. I look at her and wait for her to wake up. There is a lot of looking at her. I'm still not over that part.
The part where this amazing and beautiful, funny and strong-willed child came from me, by way of a seven hour first date, five and a bit years ago.
So yes, there's a lot of looking at her. I think I actually marvel at her. Several times a day. She just takes my glasses off my face and laughs at me. Her way of saying, 'Get over it, Ma.' But I won't. Ever.
Our days are now filled with lots of orange food and annoying toy jingles that I hear in my sleep. She waddles around in her walker, plays with the remote controls and pushes all her parents buttons. Already.
For the record, we don't mind.
Before Neil goes to work, he makes me a coffee that goes really far back on the table, so Isla doesn't get to it first. Becoming a mother has taught me to drink really fast. No more three-hour litres of coffee.
Isla is my caffeine. No, really. I've emerged from the new baby foggy fatigue. I think it's because Isla gets bored every ten minutes she isn't sleeping. She likes to listen to music while I wear her sunglasses. She likes to eat books.
I have more help around the house, but I like solo baby-wrangling, too. I put on an audio book for some hands-free reading. And I look at her.
Last week, while I was looking at her, she pointed at me and said 'Mama!'
I might have marvelled again.


text:
Allow Me to Tell You Why Giving Yourself Your First Brazilian Is a Terrible Idea
It's basically SAW: Beauty Edition.
I have been a long-time sufferer of one of the most embarrassing bodily misfunctions known to woman: dandruff. Sure, there are lots of worse ones, like hairy arms or halitosis, but they aren't as uncontrollable and sneaky. I swear it all started in the late '80s when I hair-sprayed the shit out of my bangs, forming a shellacked skyscraper of hair. This was somehow meant to soften the blow of all that headbanging. White Rain betrayed me, changing its aptly titled aerosol hairspray so I was forever raining white dandruffy flakes onto all my black clothes.I tried all sorts of products to get it under control. I expected some payback, but all those tar and salicylic acid shampoos weren't doing shit. Then, worse, my eyebrows started to get flaky. What? The dandruff spread down my scalp and onto my face? You've got to be kidding.
I Googled it and discovered, alas, this is a symptom of something called seborrhea dermatitis, which causes red inflamed bumps to appear around the crown of your head and ears. I took closer note of what was going on up top (I generally try not to look too closely at myself); there were red bumps around my scalp. So what was the cure? Steroids.Uh, my body goes berserk on meds. I needed something else, something so crazy it might work. That's when I decided to stop using shampoo and conditioner -- the last facets of civilization, the last semblance of self-care. At this point, it was like, "Fuck it, what do I have to lose?"I decided to go with the baking soda hair-cleansing technique. Something about the abrasive, scrub-like texture and all that dead skin on my head made sense. Exfoliation. So I filled a jar with baking soda and brought a little bowl and pestle into the shower with me. I dumped some baking soda into the bowl, added just enough water to make a paste and stirred it around a bit. Then, I just kind of tossed it onto my head; I put a wad in my palm and quickly splashed it onto my scalp and all over my hair, which I proceeded to scrub and scrub. It felt kind of nice. I turned the water up nice and hot and rinsed.Next, the "conditioner." I had heard of a few things: beer, lemon juice and apple cider vinegar. I am a big fan of apple cider vinegar in general; it's one of those crazy cure-alls, and it's anti-fungal. I had a little travel shampoo bottle and a big bottle of ACV. I poured the ACV into the bottle about a third of the way and filled the rest with water. Then, I poured that crazy concoction all over my head and left it in for 5 minutes while I did a body scrub. Warning: Do not shave your legs while you have ACV dripping from your head; damn, it burns.After rinsing, I strode naked into my bedroom, where my husband was reading, to enjoy the wanton adoration he tends to bestow on me in this state, only to hear him say, "What is that smell? It's horrible!" To which I responded maturely, "Oh, deal with it."Warning #2: As long as your hair is wet, you'll stink like vinegar, but once it dries you are good to go.After a few weeks of doing this, my hair was kind of oily and the flakes were not much improved. Losing hope, I added a couple new things. I started adding a few drops of tea tree oil to the baking soda mix, and I bought a natural hairbrush and started brushing my hair twice a day. Prior to this, I never brushed my hair except in the shower. I have wavy hair and brushing it dry just makes it look, well, weird and frizzy. I stuck with it, considering the first month the awkward phase. Because it was winter, I alternated between cute hats and braids to cover up the oily look. My awkward phase paid off because a few weeks later, my dandruff had significantly decreased. Every time the flakes came on strong, I just brushed them out and I was safe from embarrassing mishaps for the rest of the day. And, the best part: My hair looks all kinds of lush and shiny.There are some drawbacks. I spent the winter in Ecuador and apparently, you can't buy baking soda there without a prescription; something to do with cocaine production. So traveling this way can be cumbersome. All these mixing implements also take up significant shower space. But overall it's worth it. I get compliments on how great my hair looks all the time. I love to brag about my secret; it freaks people out.How do you feel about the idea of quitting shampoo? What do you swear by to help your dandruff?