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welcome to another fic commentary, yay! requested by the eternally (it felt like...) patient lazar_grrl.
this is actually one of my better fics, i think, so it's a little embarrassing to go through and rip it to pieces. *sheepish* but, here we go!
for pre-notes, there are two main things. this fic was inspired firstly by Ryuen, a friend from ffn, and from... some... mailing list or whatever. *SO forgetful* well, there was some mailing list! i don't remember if there was a challenge or anything, but, Ryuen was, at the time, in college, and just coming to terms with being gay. her family was not going to be supportive, and the environment she was in was not supportive, either. in fact, she (tried, at least, don't know how it worked out...) founded her college's gay and lesbian group. whatever the exact reasons for writing it were, i decided to do a story with nuriko and hotohori as girls. hey, it's reincarnation! they can come back any way in the world. ^_^
the other reason is far more personal, even. suffice it to say that a close friend went through something similar to what nuriko goes through here. it affects a person, deeply.
|title: Four Days on the Road
fandom: Fushigi Yuugi
characters/pairings: Hotohori/Nuriko (reincarnated)
rating: G/Teen
warnings: genderswap (sorta), reincarnation, girlsex, strong language, frank discussions of sex, and some moments of slight male bashing (sorry! there is a reason... and not that one, either)
summary: Two girls with shared dreams take a road trip to celebrate an anniversary.
notes: so, this is a reincarnation fic, but it's more like what i think reincarnation, were it to be true, would actually work. so, people don't necessarily come back looking the same, or with the same name, or even the same gender... hence, the girl-love. ^_~
which is why they aren't quite the same characters. sorry! also, this fic only refers to two seishi. cuz people wouldn't necessarily come back together, either... unless they were pulled together... ^_~
for reference sake, and to make it easier, i'll just tell you right off...
Rianna is Nuriko, and Sara is Hotohori.
you know, you want, in a way, to just let people figure it out for themselves. and then you think, it's fanfiction, it's fun, it's escapism... there's no reason to get haughty about it. better to just be direct about something like this, unless there's a persuasive story-based reason for it. *shrugs*
this fic is entirely Ryuen's fault. *glares meaningfully* ok, she didn't actually do anything to inspire it, but still. i blame her. *nods affirmatively*
She stands by the counter, her arms moving agitatedly as she argues with the clerk over the price of the candy bars. She had a coupon, but the old guy doesn't want to take it. Says something about the region code or whatever. Neither she nor I knows or cares about what he's talking about, but if it were me, I would have let it go.
heh, i hate writing in present tense now. and, thanks to rp'ing, i have SUCH a hard time differentiating between tenses... ~_____~
Not her. She's too passionate about everything to let it go. She will not pay full price for a snickers bar if she should be getting it for half off. She's got her university sweatshirt on over the lilac sundress, and it looks really cute, with her arms waving in the air, and her little skirt swaying around her legs as she makes her points.
She's my best friend. She's my confidante. She's my hopes and dreams.
Rianna turns to me in disgust. "Can you believe this jerk?"
I can only shrug. I don't care as much as she does, but I would never tell her that.
We've been driving since dawn. We're taking a long weekend. Cut class this morning, we'll drive all weekend, and get back Monday whenever we feel like it.
as good a point as any... for this journey, i was imagining an actual trip i might have been able to take while in grad school. that is, i followed a particular road, and such. when they get back, i'm not precisely thinking about my grad school... their dorms would be more like where i went to undergrad. but close enough. ^_~ the trip, for those of you who are curious, would be up the pacific coast, in oregon.
There's an anniversary to celebrate, and we sure as hell weren't going to do it on campus.
She gets behind the wheel this time, and I watch her as she pulls away. I'm a little tired from all the driving this morning, so it feels good to sit back in the seat and just watch. I plug her mp3 player into the cassette player, and pick a song. I'll be DJ Jazzy Sara for the afternoon. Maybe I can help her relax a little.
my friends in college were always talking about DJ Jazzy _____. ^_~
The first song is an upbeat one. We bounce our heads in time, but she would have been singing a few weeks ago.
So hard to believe your whole life can change in a few weeks...
Rianna's hair is just pulled back, and the dark curls look as tired as she does. She hasn't been sleeping well, and it always shows on her.
She used to tease that she needs her beauty sleep or else she looks like the swamp thing.
I don't try to make conversation. If she wanted to talk, she wouldn't have suggested that the two of us go off together alone. She's usually really good at including people in things, even when she doesn't want to. I've known her since we were seven. The first day of school, some boys teased me about being a tomboy, and she knocked Terry Lucius in the head. Then she took my arm and said that 'little ladies' couldn't associate with such riff raff.
heh, hotohori is the plain one. ^_^
I still remember that day perfectly, as if it were just yesterday. She is such a kind person.
Just as the song is about to end, I pick something new. Something with a strong beat, but harder. Her fingers loosen on the steering wheel.
Sometimes, you need to drown yourself in vicious music.
Our teacher in the fourth grade used to call us the tomboy and the beauty queen. I used to hate that. She used to say we made such a cute couple. I used to hate that even more.
driving, listening to music... gives you time to think.
Rianna used to smile and laugh at it, though. She said that it was cute, because we were a pair.
We used to dream together, and make up stories. We made up this whole world that was like ancient China, and I was the emperor, and she was the court princess, and we were both boys. People thought we were weird, pretending to be boys, especially Rianna, since she would dress up in skirts and wear makeup, and insist that she was a boy.
My father used to hate those games. He used to berate me, and call me names. And when he got drunk, he would threaten me.
Afterwards, Rianna would sneak into my room, and cuddle up against me. Sometimes, I could escape to her house. She would tell me that he wasn't my real father, that my real father was from ancient China, in our past life, and that she was my real family.
I believed her.
I switch the songs again, and now it's an angry woman rock song. Rianna taps her finger along the top of the steering wheel.
i loves me my angry girl music. ^_~
I watch her from the corner of my eye. She's perfectly beautiful, with thick, black hair, pale skin, small frame, nice body, and wondrous blue eyes that I love to dream about. I've been in love with her forever, it seems, but it doesn't matter.
She trusts me more than anyone else in the world. She's never dated anyone she trusts more than she trusts me.
That makes me the most important person in her life, and that's better than anything.
We're taking the scenic route. The roads are crappy, and move faster than you'd think a two-lane road with questionable shoulders should move, but it's scenic.
Rianna wanted scenic.
Fourteen songs later, she pulls over for a rest stop. She doesn't ask me if I'm hungry because she already knows that I go twelve hours between meals. I go to pump the gas, because the tomboy pumps and the beauty queen goes to the bathroom to fix her hair.
What do you know? Sometimes, the stereotypes are true.
Except, she doesn't fix her hair. She comes back looking tired. It makes my heart ache to see her like that.
"There's a motel nearby. We can stay here tonight."
"If you want to." I wonder how she knows that, but when I turn my head to pull the nozzle out of the car, I can see the sign for the hotel. Yes, kids, Sara is a genius.
i had a friend, Sara, who was very, very adamant that there was no 'h' in sara. what can i say? she won me over. ^_~
"I know we could put more miles under us, but I don't really see the point. And this seems kinda nice."
I smile at her. She doesn't need to explain to me. "I'll go pay; be right back."
"No, I'll go in."
"You got it this morning," I object, but she's already moving. I sigh, and slip into the driver's seat.
She's always doing this, and it actually doesn't bother me, but I wish she didn't feel like she had to. I wish a lot of things. She knows that I'm basically entirely cut off from my parents, and that I work as an RA and at the flower shop on campus to make ends meet. I don't feel like a charity case, because it's Rianna, but I do feel like she shouldn't have to worry about me.
there was this flower shop in the 'basement' of the student union in my undergrad university. a friend of mine used to study outside of there in one of the cubbies, because there was this guy she 'liked', and when he was on break, he would come out and be all, '____, i'm so glad you are here, i hate to eat alone! ♥' anyway. mined a lot of personal experience for this... well, for any fic, i guess. that's what they mean by 'write what you know.' but this one...
She has more important things to think about.
She gets back in and shoves the receipt in the little cubby under the stereo. I start the car and we make our way to the motel. It's cheap and a little dirty, and we don't care. We throw our bags on the floor and bounce on the beds. They're thin, but who cares? It's an adventure, right?
"Wanna watch cable?" She's got this look in her eyes.
never had cable until grad school. ^_~ motel cable was always a treat for us.
Motel cable is the best. It's part of the joy of being in a motel. Neither of us ever had cable growing up. It's not surprising that I didn't, but Rianna's family never did, either. Rianna's parents are really moral and stuff, and they think there's too much junk on cable. So, motel cable is like a treat in and of itself.
We flip the tv on, and stretch out on our respective beds. There're only five stations, so we end up watching a lame '80s movie. It had its moments.
When the credits were rolling, Rianna rolls over to face me, her sweatshirt all bunched up around her torso and her skirt up high on her legs. "Let's get some food and stay in tonight."
I just nod, and get up to go to the bathroom. We walk, because it's really a small town. There are some looks, but Rianna doesn't notice them. I'd like to think that people thought that we were a couple, but that just isn't it. Rianna gets stared at all the time. She tells me that I'm pretty, too, but who would notice under my baggy clothes, with my short hair, or with my scrubbed clean look?
maybe it's hard to see hotohori as someone who isn't concerned with looks, but... well, i think one way to look at it is that sara isn't royalty; in fact, her home life is crap. another thing is, in changing hotohori to a girl... well, being pretty is exceptional for a boy, but hotohori retains some of his manliness in sara, so, as a result, she's a pretty, but not exceptional girl, prone to tomboyishness. *shrugs* i'm not explaining well. heh. but anyway.
Well, besides Rianna, assuming that she isn't just being nice.
Just as we were about to go to this place with a plastic burger in front, and an ice cream cone of the roof, Rianna stopped and tugged on my arm. "Hey, look."
I look, but don't see anything. And then I do.
"Let's go, hm?"
As if I would say no to her. But I shrug. Actually, the idea of it makes me a little nervous, but I follow, my hands in my pockets. I know I'm slouching, but I'm trying my best.
slouch to hide her attractiveness...
See, I don't believe in psychics, but you never know, right? And what if this lady could really do it? What would she say?
I still have a secret from my best friend.not for long, sweetie.
The place isn't like you'd think. It isn't dark, with shelves full of shrunken heads and jars full of fingers or whatever. It had lots of plants, and a filmy blue curtain over the window, filtering the light.
The woman that came out wasn't what you would expect either. She was in her thirties, plumpish, with dirty blonde hair and a big smile. No makeup. That earned her points with me.
i had a tarot card reading my senior year in college. *laughs* tired of the personal stories yet? well, anyway... it wasn't anything like i'd expected. she ran them from her home, and she had this degree in paranormal psychology on the wall. she was totally, totally off-base, but she was really nice. *shrugs* i believe that a lot of things are possible, so it's best to keep an open mind. i think a real psychic would be like this. not someone who looks the part, or is all knowing. just someone who can really read people well.
"What can I do you girls for?" Her eyes dart from me to Rianna, but she's waiting for Rianna to speak. Maybe she's for real. Or maybe I'm reading into to things. I shrink back a little.
"How much for a palm reading? For a tarot reading?" Rianna talks like she does this all the time, and I know she doesn't, but it sounds good.
The woman nods, smiling. "You want a palm reading. My cards have been out of sorts all week. I think it's the moon. C'mon, sit down, let's go. It's ten dollars, by the way."
Rianna sits down in front of her, and holds her hand out. I watch, noticing how tense Rianna looks. I would offer to give her a massage later, but... We don't do that sort of thing for each other.
The woman takes her hand, just holding it for a moment or two before she starts to look. She hums, a pleasant song that makes you think you know the song, even though it's only a few bars. She runs her fingers over the inside of her palm.
I watch, a little envious.
"My, my, my... little girl, little girl, little girl... But you aren't a little girl anymore, are you? I'm sorry for your loss. Muffin, don't fret, it's not the end of the road. I promise. You have a long lifeline, very strong. The major breaks, those are mostly past. The trials you've already endured, that's prolly the worst."
Rianna's back is completely stiff, and I've inched a little closer, but she moves on.
"You have a single, steady love line. There's only one for you, pet, and you know it, have always known it. Don't be afraid of whatever is ahead of you; your love will make you strong. And you are strong."
she's been in love since her last life, after all. ^_~ from a canon point of view, i'll just say... i believe nuriko loved miaka as a big brother. i think ALL the seishi love miaka, in different ways. and they confuse the love, like hotohori thinking he was in love with miaka. but anyway. i always see hotohori as 100% gay. ^_^ just my reading of him. he HAS to get married and produce and heir, but that doesn't mean anything. nuriko, i often see as bi. and, to be honest, the most canonical pairing is probably nuriko/tasuki. but, nuriko wants hotohori so much, and i love nuriko, so... ^_~
She says more, but I don't listen anymore. I have this weird feeling like this is a private moment, even though there is almost nothing private between Rianna and me. Rianna doesn't keep any secrets.
The woman doesn't ask for my hand. She takes Rianna's ten and smiles, leading her to the door. But she does catch my arm, and smile at me.
"Thanks." I don't know why I said that, but now that it's out, I have to smile, too.
"Don't worry, peach blossom. She'll be ok."
peach blossom. because i was watching CCS at the time. ^_~
I think she must have me confused for someone else, because I'm not a peach blossom.
The next day's drive takes us closer to the water. I drive the early shift again, and Rianna sleeps next to me. She slept a little last night. It's easier to sleep when you are traveling. There's nothing else to do.
closer to the water... i said it was up the pacific coast, but you had to get to the coastline first. ^_~ now, where i went to grad school, the coast was... about an hour in from the campus. so, they must have been a bit further in. ^_~
But she had me shift the furniture so we could push the beds a little closer. I wanted to sleep with her, but I know what she was thinking.
She needed to be able to sleep on her own.
With the ocean on one side, and trees and hills on the other, it was a really pretty ride.
Except we didn't care that much for the scenery.
Still and all, it was very pretty, and after a while, we decided to pull over and go to this park there was a sign for.
The sign said something like 'Some Stupid Guy Who Gave The State A Lot Of Money State Park,' and I think the big attraction, and why they were charging $10 to get in, was the dunes. The dunes were pretty cool there, and a lot people liked to dune buggy around.
after our comp exams, a friend and i went to the dunes and ran around. it was SO much fun... the sand was just so beautiful and soft, and it felt great. and there were these guys on dunes in dune buggies... really did not look fun. plus, very dangerous!
That seemed like fun, and there was this group of guys with buggies down the way, but Rianna and I had fun just running up and down the dunes. It was hard! And Rianna actually laughed a little. Not much, but still...
She was wearing these tan shorts, and two tank tops, with spaghetti straps. The underneath one had a shelf bra. She looked really cute, with her pigtails and multiple tanks. She held her arms out from her body as she ran down the dune, yelling a little as she tripped down the high sands, barefoot.
I felt overdressed in my jeans, but then, I never really like to wear shorts much anyway.
i just about never wear shorts. ^_^
Rianna's legs seem so long, without shoes and in those shorts. Like they just stretch on and on for miles. So smooth, and perfectly formed...
I try not to stare too much, but it's been a while since she's been so happy.
We're still just running around on the dunes when the guys with the buggies come up.
"Baby! Wanna take a ride?" The guy in the front is talking to Rianna, since there's no possible way he could be talking to me. He's sorta good looking, I think, but he hasn't shaved in a while. Most people wouldn't find that too disgusting, but I know that Rianna has a thing about facial hair.
ew, facial hair. ^_~
She even got one of her ex's to wax his face, but only that one time.
"Actually, my friend and I are just meandering around on our own, thanks." She pretends to be polite, but I've known her long enough to know better. She wants them gone.
I step up closer to her, to emphasize her point. I'm very aware that there are four of them, and they're on buggies, and the little shack pretending to be the ranger station is pretty far away and they probably can't hear us from here...
"Oh, ditch the dyke and play with us, babe." The redhead behind the guy in front made some obscene gesture with his nose and eyebrows, which I might have found creative if I wasn't so busy being offended.
Rianna is very easy going and laid back, unless you mess with one of her friends. Then she becomes megabitch from hell girl.
It's one of the things I love about her.
"Mm, as much fun as it might be playing with adolescent boys who need big machines to get anything done, my friend and I are actually quite well off without you, so why don't you little boys take your Tonka trucks back to the big sandbox and leave us alone?" She crosses her arms over her chest and turns her back to them, turning her little nose up as she does.
wow, that would SO not work in real life... *laughs*
She so rules.
The redhead is about to get huffy, but the guy in front looks like he's a lot nicer than his friends. He revs his engine, and smiles. "Sorry to disturb you ladies. Just thought you might be interested. Have a good day!" And he drives off, giving the redhead a dirty look, his friends behind him.
had to throw in a nice guy or else there would be trouble...
The redhead spits in our direction, but it doesn't actually get that close.
Rianna is still fuming. So like her not to be able to give up her anger...
She stomps across the sand, kicking out as she moves, the sand sparkling as it splashes around her footfalls. "All men are alike! Such jackasses! Can you believe those guys! I mean, honestly, like no woman in her right mind would ever refuse them, unshaven heathens..."
I trail after her, kicking the sand, too, because it's fun. Her cheeks flush as she talks, her arms flailing about her body madly. I would say something, but I know when she gets worked up like this, she doesn't really listen anyway.
kinda cute, rianna is all worked up, and sara is having fun, still. ^_^
"Men think they are such studs, even the ugly ones! Remember that boy, Patrick, from high school? He was always pawing me, asking me out and stuff... He must have had ten gallons of oil in his face, and he thought I would actually date him?!?"
I remember that guy. He was a jerk. Always hanging around when he wasn't wanted... Rianna's boyfriend beat him up one afternoon. Rianna never knew that it was Jason who did that. He told me about it, though. Asked me not to tell Rianna. I never have, because Jason said that he only did it because Patrick was overheard saying that he was going to have Rianna, 'whether she liked it or not.' I don't know, and neither did Jason, whether that was true or not, or even if it was just talk, but he was a jerk, and it was about time someone pummeled him for it.
any boyfriend who wanted to stay with rianna had to be friendly with sara. ^_~
"Fuck! It's like they think they're gods just cuz they have dicks. Most of them don't know how to use them, but hey! I've got this sorta small thing hanging between my legs, so naturally women want to worship me!"*snickers*
I laugh, but she's too worked up to hear me anyway. It's hard to keep up with her, actually.
"Like a dick is such a great thing, anyway. I certainly never saw the appeal." She plops down in the sand, at the top of the dune. We can see the ocean from here.
"I think there is a certain... er, functionality to them." I sit as close to her as I can, my butt sinking into the sand, my fingers digging in. It's warm and comforting.
"I'm not so sure." Her voice is dark, and I want to kick myself. What a stupid thing to say! "They hand them out to just anyone. If they were really functional, there's be a screening process."
"Three day waiting period, and a psychological profile." I try to tease, bumping my knee against hers.
*laughs* there would be no men left....
"Hmph!" Her little nose wrinkled up. "Right, cuz that works so well for guns! Men are such... pigs! Do you know what Ryan said when I told him? He said, Thank god!" She shakes her head, and hugs her knees. "Can you believe that? Thank god."
i wonder if anyone didn't know what it meant here...
I want to spit nails, but I don't have any nearby. "He... he was just stupid."
"Of course he was. He had a Y chromosome. It inhibits brain activity." She rests her chin on her knees and glares at the ocean. "He tried to get me to sleep with him that night. Said 'lightning never strikes twice, baby.' So, a, he was a complete insensitive jackass, and b, he was scientifically inaccurate."
She's nearly growling now. She hasn't told me this, yet. Maybe she was afraid I would try something, and get hurt. She's always worrying about other people getting hurt, never looking after herself...
"God, I don't know what I ever saw in him. It makes me sick to think there was a time when I thought he was something special." She burrows a little in her cocoon of arms and legs. "I can't believe I used to be infatuated with him. I thought he was smart, and funny... Just another jackass."
*cuddles her*
I scoot closer to her, letting my legs touch hers. "Don't do this, Rianna, please. Everybody lives and learns, right?"
"I can't even remember now what was so great about him. All he wanted was sex. We didn't have that much in common, we didn't do that much else together. I can remember when I first met him, thinking that he was so..."
She hasn't done this yet. I want to sigh and cry. It's good, but hard, and if I could, I would spare her from any pain.
Of course, I fail miserably in that hope almost daily...
"But the more I got to know him, the more things were the same as with any guy. I mean, sex is just... Oh, I'm sorry, Sara. I don't want to get all male-bash-y." She turns to face me, her eyes wide with apology.
I hate that. Like, just because I've never had sex, I can't understand what she's gone through. I smile, and shake my head. "Please, go on. I don't mind. You have a right to be bitter."
i have a friend that does that. ~_~
She smiles as she sighs, and lays her face on her knees. "I mean, it's all right, I guess. But... I just wish... I mean, it's pretty good. But it's not that big a deal. The first time always sucks. Sometimes, it hurts. Maybe... maybe I should have spoken out more, but I just..."
She pauses, her eyes closing as she nearly trembles with the need to say what she means.
"It's like I never really wanted for any of them to get so close to me, you know? Like, if I told Ryan what I liked and where I wanted him to touch me, he would know something secret about me that he wasn't good enough to know. So, I would just let him do whatever. But I think the whole sexual evolution thing went horribly astray! He would play with my breasts for hours, and after a while I was like, that's nice, but could we move this on to someplace more interesting? And then he'd get going, but it was never really enough to get me, you know? I even bought lube once, told him that it was necessary sometimes. I was just sick of... aching afterwards.
"And I always felt empty. Like, I didn't want him in me, really, but when it was over, I felt like he... like he took something from me."
She becomes pensive for a moment, and I'm haunted by memories. The other people on my floor wonder why I've taken to using the community bathroom, but if they knew what had happened in my bathroom...
She seems to physically break herself out of her reverie. "And god! He was always going on about getting a damn blowjob! Fuckin' 'ey, it's not like he was ever offering to get on his knees for me! Oh, god, no, that would be disgusting, but sticking his filthy prick in my mouth, no, that's good! Bastard..."
If she were in a cartoon, she'd have steam coming out of her ears. Seriously.
She turns to look at me, her eyes blazing. "Do you ever think of just... chucking them all in?"
"The ocean?"
"No, I mean, just forgetting all about them and just... just... going the other way?"
"The other way of what?" I swear to god, I'm not stupid, I'm not! But I can be a little obtuse from time to time...
"Sara!" She rolls her eyes and looks perfectly cute. "I mean... you know, forgetting about boys and concentrating on girls?"
"Oh." Dear god, she's serious. I try to think of something to say, and find my mouth is moving before my brain. "Well, yeah. Naturally."
"Yeah?" She looks at me, her eyes perfectly blank, questioning. Her posture is totally serious. She's goading me on, and my stupid mouth is letting her...
"I'm gay."
Now why the hell did I say that? What if she freaks? What if she hates me? What if she gets weird around me, and doesn't want me to be close to her, or doesn't want to share a room in the motel, or...
She stares at me, before screwing up her face in a glare. "Sara!" She whacks me on the shoulder. For such a small girl, she can really hit... "Why didn't you ever tell me? How long have you known? Why wouldn't you talk to me about this?"
I find my heart is pounding. I can't believe this is out, as it were, but I feel... I feel... like a vice has been loosened around my heart. It feels good! "I... I... I'm sorry, I just... I thought, well, maybe... maybe you might be upset, or weird or..."
"Oh, Sara!" And she just flings herself at me, her arms swallowing me whole.
I want to cry a little.
"You should know that you could say anything to me. We're bound, remember? I'll love you forever, no matter what." She speaks in my ear, and her body is up against mine, and I'm holding her, and it's different than ever before because she knows now, and she loves me, she said so...
I want to tell her how much that means to me, but my throat is solid, and no sound can come out.
*twiddles thumbs* eheh. sorry. um. *shrugs* i can think of a couple of friends coming out's to me... didn't go exactly like this. eh. *tries harder to think of interesting things*
"Sara, don't start crying, please, because then I'll cry, and for god's sake, you know I'll never stop!" She wipes at my eyes, her hands on my face, and she smiles even as her cheeks trembled with the unshed tears.
She is so perfect.
"Thank you." I manage to squeak it out, and she hugs me again, and I wrap my arms around her waist, because it feel so good to have her know!
see, these things are easier to do when i can rip on my writing. *laughs* i try to avoid using so many exclamation points, but i think, in this case, it's a hazard of the pov. one of the reasons i dislike this pov, but sometimes, the damned fics decide they want to be written in first person present tense, and there's nothing you can do about it. *shrugs*
If I had known how good this would be, I wouldn't have kept this from her for so long.
The guys on buggies are below us, and the stupid redhead is saying something, but thank god, we can't hear him. We can hear one of the other one's whistling.
I wish that there was something for them to whistle about, but really, there is, isn't there?
She knows, and she said she still loves me.
I'm happy. And she's smiling, which is a damn fine thing, the day before anyway.
oooooh, om~in~ous overtoooooones. *coughs* no, i presume by this point everyone knows what's going on. ^_^
Just when we get in the car, she slams her hand on the steering wheel, swearing.
"What?" I'm anxious that we've forgotten something important, or something is wrong...
"I can't believe it! That fucking jackass redhead was right!"
It takes me a full minute to understand what she means, and when I get it, I start to laugh, out loud and really deep.
She stares at me with a mixture of whimsy and disbelief, before she starts to laugh, too.
She hasn't laughed that hard for over a month. I lean back in the seat, really glad we stopped to play in the dunes.
When I wake up, I have that moment of uncertainty where I don't know where I am or who I am, and the morning is wonderfully beautiful. The light coming in from the crack between the curtains is spreading out in the room softly, and the only thing I can see outside the sliver of visible window it blue.
I turn in bed, and see Rianna on the edge of her bed, her hands clutching the mattress so that her knuckles are white. She's wearing cargo pants and a denim shirt over a tank.
It's been exactly one month.
We move silently, packing up and leaving, as if the world is on mute, and all I can hear is white noise.
I feel alien.
Rianna gets behind the wheel determinedly, and if I had ever entertained the notion of driving myself this morning, I would have sent the notion home with scant apologies. Her jaw is tight, and her eyes narrowed slightly. She is on a mission, and god help the unfortunate soul who gets in her way.
The drive supplies slightly louder white noise, and I find myself wondering about god. Is he or she out there? Is he or she watching us today? Does god care about two girls in a car, one month later?
And if so, then why?
The car veers sharply to the left, and Rianna has found it. It's only an inlet, but it's somewhat inhospitable, and so it will be private.
I wander over the sand, looking for driftwood. Rianna is collecting stones. We're building a fire.
When we were in girl scouts, we tried to build a fire for ten hours on our one and only camp out. Our troop leader was in tears at the end of the day, we were all freezing, and the other parents that came had started to talk about taking all the girls to some nearby motel or something. We were excited about the idea of bunking together in a motel, but the troop leader was screaming that by god! These girls will have a camp out!!
Rianna and I told the girls in our circle that we knew a celestial spirit who could make fire with only a word. We were going to summon him to come and rescue us. We held hands and chanted to the sky, and then we told everyone that it didn't work because they didn't believe.
When I'm too weighed down to carry any more wood, I head back to Rianna, hoping that we won't need to perform any summonings.
She's got a circle nicely cordoned off, and she's shredding some newspaper. It's an amazingly short amount of time later that we have a bonfire going. The flames lap up, higher and higher, and we sit, tired, watching the show.
Moving on autopilot, her eyes never leaving the flames, Rianna pulls the bottle out of her bag. It's just a plastic water bottle, the label ripped off, with a nearly black clump in the neck. We both stare at the bottle, as if it might become animated and start telling us about the War of 1812. Uncertainly, Rianna unscrews the cap, and stands up. She stands in front of the fire, puzzling over the best way to complete our purpose. After a moment's reflection, she drops the bottle in the middle of the fire.
inanimate objects always talk about the most random, boring things... *coughs*
There's no way that clump will pour out now, a month later, so this is the only way to cremate it.
We both scoot back, as there is a snaking hiss of fumes coming from the burning plastic. Rianna falls into pieces.
She hasn't cried since she stopped bleeding, and I find that I can't tear my eyes away from the remains. I open my arms, and she falls, half into my embrace and half into my lap. She's heaving with sobs, the weight of her pain finally slipping from her shoulders.
I can't even imagine what she must be suffering. I don't even want to. I know that I'm not even a quarter as strong as she is, to have borne it all this time, but it breaks my heart and makes me shake with fear to see her like this.
Rianna has always been so strong.
in more ways than one, obviously, but i think strength is nuriko's defining quality.
I find the flames, and the incinerating bottle, mesmerizing. I find myself reliving it all, as I rub circles over Rianna's back.
I sat on the edge of the tub in my private bathroom while Rianna sat on the toilet. We stared at the plastic stick, our fingers interlaced. She hadn't told Ryan that she was two weeks late and feeling weird, only me. We had bought the pregnancy test together, and we stared at it together, wondering silently how long a minute could last.
When the two blue lines appeared, she just shuddered. All over her body, and then she looked up, meeting my eyes.
God, we were so scared.
Rianna had grown up Catholic. I had watched her make her First Communion, and her Confirmation. She wasn't particularly devout, but she believed in god and heaven and hell and loving her neighbors.
She came back from talking to Ryan shaking, with anger and fear. He had freaked out. Well, he was 19, but Rianna was only 20, and she was the one who was pregnant. He told her she had to have an abortion.
He might as well have told her she had to slit her wrists.
They talked several times, and then eight days after she took the test, she came back to my room, bruised and hysterical.
He'd slapped her across the face, and kicked her in the stomach. He said that if she wouldn't get an abortion, he would make sure that it was taken care of.
Rianna was terrified, not sure if he had killed her baby. Those were her words. Her stomach was black and blue, with sickly yellow stripes all across it. We waited for hours, and days, and nothing happened.
I don't know if it was Ryan's fault or not, because it was nearly a week after that that Rianna came to my room right as I was going to bed. She had started to bleed, and it wasn't stopping.
We went into the bathroom again, and I helped her into the tub. I tried to make her as comfortable as possible. She begged me to tell her that sometimes pregnant women bleed, and that it would be ok, but it was too much blood, and it wasn't stopping. She was hemorrhaging.
I'd never seen so much blood. It still hasn't washed out of my tub entirely.
I kept giving her bottles of water, because I was scared of how much blood she was losing. It was one of those bottles that she caught some of the blood, and a big clot, with. It seemed kinda gross to me, but Rianna was focused on that bottle like it was the cure to cancer.
She said it was all she had of her first child.
I watch the bottle twist and deform, and I'm surprised to find that my cheeks are soaking.
Eventually, the fire dies down, and as if the flames were fueling her grief, Rianna calms. She's almost catatonic as I pick up our stuff, and lead her to the car. I place her in the passenger seat, and we drive off, her eyes blankly staring off into space, away from me.
erm. i sure they put out the fire before they left... doused it and such. *nods*
I check us into a motel, and help Rianna in. There is no question; she doesn't ask and I don't ask. We get into our sleeping clothes, and crawl into bed together. I take her in my arms, and she settles her body over mine. I rub her back, and feel her breathe against my collarbone. Each breath feels forced, but as I massage her back and run my hand up and down her arm, she calms, eventually, and I think she's going to sleep.
I can't sleep. There's nothing sexual about our sleeping arrangement, even though she knows now, but I'm afraid that if I close my eyes, the whole world will crumble.
Rianna has always been so strong.
I'm afraid I won't be able to be the strong one. I'm afraid of letting her down.
I'm afraid that I still need her, and I don't know quite what to do, now that she's depending on me.
If she weren't on top of me, I would have jumped out of my skin. I thought she was asleep. "Yeah?"
"...Are you in love with me?"
There's a moment of quiet, and it honestly never occurs to me to lie. "Yeah, but don't worry about it. Just go to sleep."
wah, it's not good to point out things i like if i'm not pointing out bad things, is it? but i really like this exchange...
I kiss her forehead, and close my eyes, willing us both to sleep.
The next day starts out slowly. We're far away from campus, and we need to get back before tonight. We've already missed two days of classes.
The next day. ha. whole word missing typo! god bless the typos. ^_~ ...ok, just fixed it...
I drive the first stretch, even though it's morning, because Rianna is still wiped out. She looks... faded. She sleeps some more in the passenger seat, and I steal quick glances at her as I head for the highway.
pretty much all the way up and down the west coast of america, there are "two" roads (well, there could be more than two, but...). there's the main expressway, which is some single digit number... drat, now i have to look this up... i think it's 5... and dude. i'm right. *coughs* anyway, there's the expressway, which is superfast, natch, (though be careful of pulling over there... at least, a friend warned me about the bad things that have happened on the shoulder of interstate 5... which comes up later here, ha), but the expressway is pretty inland, as it is wide and pretty straight, all the way down. then, there's the road that literally runs down the coastline, where, a lot of the time, you can see the pacific. that's much smaller and much slower, and muchmuch windier. so, they drove from their campus to the coast, and drove up the coastline on that road, and now they are headed to 5 to get back home muchmuch faster. ^_~
It's good that she's finally getting some sleep.
We stop for lunch, not really because we are hungry, but because we're tired of sitting in the car, and we don't want to eat on campus anyway.
I start to feel it at lunch. Rianna looks tired, but she's not looking at me, and no matter how many times I try, we don't get a conversation started.
There're these little bags under her eyes, and I know that she must be worried. And now I'm worrying about what she's worrying about...
Not that there isn't enough that could be plaguing her mind, but there are two confessions I didn't intend to make that might be causing this, too...
She takes the keys after lunch, and maybe I'm imagining things, but it seems like she goes out of her way to not touch me when she takes them. I huddle into my seat, and watch the scenery stream by.
It starts to feel cold, but I don't say anything. I find that I can't say anything. I'm afraid. And ashamed. Yesterday, we burned the only remains of Rianna's first, dead child, and I'm so worked up over my little crush that I can't be a good friend. Rianna has never let me down, not for a second, and I can't be the friend that she needs now.
I suck.
We're not that far from campus, only two exits away, and it's just getting to be dusk. The trees on the side of the road are going black, and the deep blue-black sky above looks huge.
i love that time of day. ^____^
It's pretty.
Suddenly, the car veers to the right, and I make some noise as I brace myself.
Rianna looks determined as she pulled the car into the shoulder.
For a second, I'm too stunned to react, but then Rianna is getting out of the car so I have to follow her. Belatedly, I admit, but she really has me turned around.
I have this itchy feeling under my skin, like it's not safe. Rianna is walking towards the trees on the side of the highway, and my whole being is filled with a sort of primal fear of the unknown. Anything could be in those trees...
"Rianna? What's going on?" I just wish she would stop walking so fast...
"I don't understand. It doesn't make sense. I've been trying to work it out all day, and trying to work it out, but it doesn't make sense."
"What? What's wrong?" Oh, please oh please oh please let it be a calculus problem...
*snorts* yeah, don't think so, cutie...
"You said you loved me, is that true?" When she looks at me like that, I wish that she would always be looking at me.
"You've never said anything."
"...I'm sorry."
"I just don't... God, Sara! It just keeps spinning through my head, and I don't understand! Everything keeps spinning inside, and spinning... do you know how many times I've let some jackass paw at me, and slobber all over me? I lost my virginity when I was 16. I was scared, I bled, it hurt... I just wanted to be normal!" She's pleading with me, and even though my legs are made of concrete, I move closer to her, wanting to comfort.
"It's ok, Rianna, don't get mired in regret. It doesn't do any good."
*coughs* that doesn't sound very natural... ah, anyway...
"If I had only known... but it doesn't make sense, I couldn't have known. I just... I just wanted to be normal. Sara, you can understand that, right? I just wanted..."
"It's ok, Rianna," I try to speak soothingly as I come closer to her. "There's nothing wrong with you."
"But I can't be gay!" She bursts out, her eyes wide and wild. "My parents will never forgive me!"
I shake my head, confused. "You don't have to be gay, Rianna. I am. That's all."
"You don't understand." She sighs, crossing her arms over her stomach. "I never thought that you would ever have feelings for me... In the dreams, you never loved me back."
What did she just say?
"I never thought... and I just wanted to be normal, I wanted to be your friend. And... and now, everything is so messed up, and I hate myself and the things that I've done..."
I put my arms around her, no longer concerned for myself. "Shh, don't say that, Rianna, don't ever say that. Everything is fine. I promise."
"But..." She's sniffling in my ear. "My parents will kill me if I tell them I'm gay. You know how they are! They think Will and Grace is part of a subversive gay conspiracy. They'll never want to see me again..."
I don't know what to say, because really, there's nothing to say. I look her in the eyes, and I keep my arms around her. She leans forward, just a little, like she's tired.
I don't even realize it's happening until it's over.
I kissed her.
Or she kissed me.
It doesn't really matter, because we kissed.
aw. heh.
We stare into each other's eyes for what feels like one perfect lifetime, and then she smiles.
She is so beautiful.
She puts her forehead on mine, and takes my hands in hers.
We walk back to the car, and she drives us home.
She takes my hand every so often, running her fingers over my fingers.
I can't stop smiling.
We get back, and both go straight to my room. Rianna actually lives on campus, but in a different dorm. I had to move dorms to be an RA, and I didn't get much notice about it, either. But it's all right, because my room is large, and Rianna has a lot of her stuff in my room, for those times when she ends up there for the night.
We both check our messages, and get ready for going back to classes the next day, but we do so half-heartedly. It's always hard to get back into your groove when you break away for even a short spell, and anyway, we both care a little bit less about school now than we might usually.
I keep looking at her, and touching her, just a little, to be sure that it is real.
We kissed.
She throws her notebook aside and walks to the bathroom, somewhat noisily. When she gets back, she's in a pair of her brother's boxers, and a tank. I slip into the bathroom, and brush my teeth as fast as I can.
She's on the bed when I get out, and a cold shiver of anticipatory delight snakes down my spine and to my toes. She's hugging her knees, and when I walk into the room, her eyes come up to meet mine.
"If my child had lived," she speaks slowly, as if she's discovering the words, "my parents would have been furious. They would never have let Father O'Harrigan and the rest of the church know their baby girl had gotten herself pregnant. They would have thrown me out."
I lean against my dresser, griping the edge. It's true. Rianna's parents are nice people. Nice, not warm or friendly, or giving. They pride themselves on being nice.
It isn't nice for young girls to spawn bastard children.
"Maybe it's fate." She sighs as she drops her arms to the bed, her legs slipping loose, and she curls one corner of her mouth in something like a smile. "Maybe I'm not meant to make my parents happy."
I go to sit down next to her. "I never want to cause you pain."
"Then be with me." She leans in, and puts her head on my shoulder. "Be with me, Sara, because I need you, and I hate putting any kind of pressure on you, I don't want to be a burden, but..."
"Hush." I put my finger on her lips, quieting her. I can't believe she would apologize for needing me.
She kisses my finger.
I stare at her in shock, feeling a warm tingle shiver through me. I want to pull back, but she leans even more into my body.
"Be with me, Sara."
they were supposed to have sex here. well, they did. but it was supposed to be more... explicit. just didn't fit. *shrugs*
There is no denying the need in her. There isn't any want to deny.
Her mouth and mine meet again, and our lips intermingle. I taste the flesh of her lips as my tongue swipes out, involuntarily, and suddenly we are kissing deeply.
My hands are clutching the sheets like a lifeline. I want to put my fingers in her hair, I want to touch the skin at the base of her spine, I want to put my palm over her heartbeat...
Her hands are on the side of my face, and she pushes herself practically in my lap. She tastes a little desperate.
It is with supreme control of will that I pull away to speak. Especially since she starts to kiss my jaw and suck on my jugular.
"Ri... Rianna... We... We should..."
"I need to know this is real, Sara." She runs her hands up and down my arms, and I relax to the point that I release the sheets. "I need to know..."
"I love you, Rianna." I don't want her to feel like she has to do anything. I can't begin to count the number of times I wanted to smash in the head of some boy who made Rianna cry because of what they had done. I want to move slowly.
"I know, Sara." She puts her hand on my stomach, under my t-shirt. "I need to know."
I'm not sure what she needs to know, but I know that my ability to resist her hands and lips and body is limited. We keep kissing until we are flat on the bed, and our hands are in motion. I find her flesh, and I feel expanded. I feel choked with experience.
I feel like there will never be another moment like this, as if each breath is the most significant breath I would ever take in my life, and I believe it, truly.
I brush aside the strap of her tank, and my hand trembles. She stares up at me, her lips parted and moist, her little nostrils flaring as she breathes. I hesitate, mostly because I can feel the boundary we are passing, and I want to be sure.
I don't want her to feel awkward, or to feel like I'm taking and not giving, but I don't know what I can offer her that she would want. I take off my shirt, because I don't want her to be naked and me dressed and I want her to be naked, but I'm afraid.
My chest is almost flat, my breasts barely hanging at all. My torso is very boyish, and I feel gangly and unattractive next to her, and her smoothly perfect skin and feminine, lush body.
She smiles at me, and wiggles her torso so she can finagle her way out of her top. I help her, and then we are both mostly naked.
Her hands reach out first, and the wondrously innocent pleasure in her eyes sparks me. It isn't much longer before we are pressed close together, our hands wandering, our flesh heating up together.
It's with an almost surreal comprehension that it dawns on me that we're having sex. I'm having sex with Rianna. She and I are having sex.
When we are able to breathe normally again, when the air cools the sweat on our bodies and we have to burrow under the covers together to keep from shivering, when our eyes are heavy and our bodies feel lax, she cuddles up to me, sticking her little nose into the skin below my ear.
"I love you, Sara."
"Good," I say, and we fall asleep.
She walks ahead of me as we make our way to the dining hall. She swings her bag at her knees, and she moves jauntily, as if she's half-skipping, and half-walking.
She smiles at everyone who passes us, and all the boys try to catch her eye, but she only looks back at me, sauntering with my hands in my pockets to keep from grabbing her by the waist, and winks.
She's wearing a little sundress, the kind with the ties behind the neck that's backless. When she turns to look at me, the sides go a little slack, and I can see the sides of her unfettered breast. She laughed in the morning as she tossed her bra away, and joked that she didn't need it in the league she had joined.
We had agreed that there was no need to tell anyone just yet, and that we probably wouldn't tell her parents for a little while. They wouldn't react right anyway.
Her hair swings around her face as she moves, and it touches her shoulders teasingly. I know I'm smiling more than I usually do, and the few people who recognize me give me a few strange looks.
What can I say, but look at her!
She's my best friend. She's my confidant. She's my hopes and dreams.
She's my lover. She's my only one. She's my joy.
aw. *has nothing else to say* meep. that was boring, sorry...


text:
BALTIMORE, Md. - The American University women's basketball team opened up conference play on Friday, Dec. 30, with a 60-45 victory over Loyola Maryland.
The Eagles are now 4-8 for the season and 1-0 in the Patriot League. Loyola falls to 4-8 overall and 0-1 in the conference.
Although senior Lauren Crisler would put up key points for the Eagles early in the game, it was sophomore Kaitlyn Lewis who led the scoring efforts by the final buzzer. Lewis put up a team-high 13 points, followed closely by Crisler who added another 12 points and six rebounds.
Sophomore Cecily Carl led the team on the boards, pulling down ten rebounds to accompany her nine point contribution. Junior Emily Kinneston also put up a solid game with six points and nine rebounds.
The Eagles dominated from the field, shooting 48 percent overall while holding Loyola to only 29 percent.
Molly Taylor and Bri Betz-White led the Greyhounds with a pair of double-figure efforts. Taylor put up 11 points while Betz-White added another ten. Lauren Daugherty pulled down a team-high six rebounds.
American dominated from the start, holding Loyola to under ten points in each of the first two periods. Senior Lauren Crisler got the scoring started for the Eagles, going on a 6-2 solo run in the first few minutes of the first period.
Although the Greyhounds would gain a brief lead in the final minute of the period, a layup from freshman Katie Marenyi would push the Eagles back into the lead that they held during the rest of the game.
It was much the same story in the second period, as a pair of early layups from junior Michael Harris continued building American's lead. The Eagles closed the half with a 29-18 lead, shooting 63.6 percent from the field while holding the Greyhounds to 18.2 percent shooting for the period.
American extended its lead to 20 during the third period after a layup from Carl put them up 43-23. A late push from the Greyhounds during the fourth period would put them within ten of the Eagles, but a nine point drive from Lewis in the midst of AU's 14-2 run gave the team a sizeable cushion heading into the final minutes of regulation.
AU will return home on Monday, Jan. 2, to host Colgate at 2 p.m. in Bender Arena. For the latest on the Eagles, stay tuned to AUEagles.com and follow the team on Twitter @AU_WBasketball.
* The game against Colgate was rescheduled to a 2 p.m. tipoff. It originally appeared on the schedule as a 5 p.m. start.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
How It Works
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text:
Three days of content specifically for IT pros in education.
Networking with colleagues who understand your work.
Morning snacks, three lunch meals, and two evening networking events.
Wi-Fi included, free.
Free parking.
Discounted room rates at local hotels.
Where can I contact the organizer with any questions?
You can contact us by email at email@example.com.
Do I have to bring my printed ticket to the event?
Yes. Tickets will be used at check-in.
Can I pay with a PO or Check?
Yes, you may select that option during checkout.
What is the refund policy?
You may cancel your registration 30 days before the conference for a full refund. No refunds will be accepted after April 1, 2018.
The name on the registration/ticket doesn't match the attendee. Is that okay?
No. If you need to update the information on the registration, you may follow the instructions on your registration email to update the attendee information, or you may email us at email@example.com.
Are meals included in the registration?
Monday: Morning snack, lunch, afternoon snacks, and evening event with heavy hors-d'oeuvres and refreshments are included.
Tuesday: Morning snack, lunch, afternoon snacks and evening dinner are included.
Wednesday: Morning snack and lunch are included.
Where is the conference located?
Tech Talk Live is located in the Burhle Business Park at The Conference and Training at IU13, 1020 New Holland Avenue, Lancaster, PA 17601.
Where should I park?
Free parking is available right outside our facility.
Tech Talk Live is the only conference of its kind in the region specifically designed for IT pros in education.
1020 New Holland Avenue, Lancaster, PA 17601
(717) 606-1770


text:
We are commercial photographers - working for top magazines, businesses and organizations on a regular basis. Combine that knowledge and work flow, we are used to preparing outstanding images fast and complete.
You pay one fee - and you own the entire group of photos! Yes - we don't have sales people - YOU are in control!
We come to your wedding with how many photographers you asked for and how many hours you need. We photograph everything we can at the wedding, provide you with a full listing of suggested images and formals, and within 24 to 48 hours - you have a complete online gallery ready to download, share on social media - whatever you want!
You may share that link with any family member or friend and they may purchase their own prints, digital images, books, canvases, anything they want, right there online!
This means you don't have to purchase photographs for everyone - and everyone may have what they like! YOU have the entire shoot digitally!
YOU are in control on how much you need from us. We are more than happy to meet with you after the wedding and go over books, large printed pieces, editing or other things you may wish to purchase - (most of our brides and grooms do this...) however, you don't HAVE to!
Your wedding is right there for you to enjoy and share professional images immediately!
All fees are paid up front and in full. You don't have to worry about extra expenses at the end of the wedding. You know exactly what your photography and videography is going to cost.
In addition we offer:
This is our complete price list - the only thing not added is 8.25% State of Texas Sales Tax and any travel fees outside the DFW area.
(Time is only time actually working at the wedding, not travel time and for 1 Photographer)
1 Hour $500.00
2 Hours $700.00
4 Hours $1300.00
6 Hours $2000.00
8 Hours $3000.00
Photo Booth with onsite prints - 1 hour - $500
Formal Portraits only - $100
Additional Photographers each per 2 hour time blocks: $150.00
2 hours of video $500
4 hours of video $700
6 hours of video $1300
8 hours of video $2000
10 hours of video $4000
Drone video ( where permitted by law) $200
Add'l Videographers each per 2 hour block $150
Custom DVD cover $50
Video Services include shooting, basic editing and one DVD series. Additional DVD series / sets are available for $75 each at the time of order.
Our studio is located in North Fort Worth easy to get to off Loop 820N and Main Street. Plenty of parking! We offer engagement and bridal portraits either at our studio or on location. ( Weather permitting on location)
Choose as much or as little as you need. You will never be pressured to purchase more. We know weddings are expensive - we know EVERYTHING is expensive - we want you to have a great wedding and even better memories - let us do this for you.
Want to book? Contact us at (817) 681-9851 or email us at: email@example.com
we'll be there - guaranteed!
(Print a copy of this price list)


text:
Online Seminars
Our Centre runs regular seminars from Centre members and visiting scholars. Many of these are now available to the public via our iTunes-U channel, which you can also reach through the 'iTunes-U' button at the top of this page.
For CoEDL members, access to Centre presentations and seminars can be found on the Centre's members website.
Our public lectures, presentations and seminars are available here.


text:
Do you have a lot of big dreams that you would like to achieve but you don't believe that they are possible? Maybe you think that you're lacking in some way. Whether it's your level of education or the amount of money in your bank. The key is recognizing that these limitations are all in your head!
We've all read books and watched movies where the underdog overcomes the impossible and achieves their goal. This isn't just the stuff of Hollywood fiction, it is reality. People are doing the impossible all the time! Instead of overthinking everything and worrying about everything that could go wrong, ask yourself "what's the worst that can happen?"
Even if things don't work out exactly how you want them to, what's the worst outcome? Will you lose your home, go bankrupt or threaten your very existence? The truth is that things are never as bad as we envision them to be. The chances of our perceived worst case scenarios actually becoming a reality are slim to none. So what's keeping us from letting go of our fears and insecurities and really going for the things we want in life?
Just because we may not succeed at a goal that we strive towards, it doesn't mean that we are a failure. It simply means that we haven't figured out the best way to move forward. We have to let go of our concerns about what other people are thinking about the things that we do and how they may judge us. The late Dr. Wayne Dyer reminds us that "other people's opinions are none of our business." Once we accept this as truth, we can move forward without concerning ourselves with what anyone else is saying or thinking. Instead, we can focus on doing what we need to do to get where we want to go.
Don't let your fears and insecurities stop you from living the life you want and deserve. Remember that we aren't here to live mediocre lives. Extraordinary is always an option, just waiting for you to choose it.
Now signing off with the reminder: Don't wait for the world to recognize your greatness, live it and let the world catch up to you.


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Clever top of the fridge as a shelf storage ideas
My roommate and I are pretty easy going about where stuff goes in our small kitchen. We've done wonders with the McPartment kitchen we have but one place we cannot seem to keep organized at all is on top of the fridge. Generally we keep our collection of ziplock baggies (large freezer, medium freezer, and snack size) and our tin foil, parchment paper and plastic wrap.* Obviously I'm not allowed to install a cabinet above, and we're both on the short/average size so we can just reach up there but can't get to the back of the fridge. Does anyone have any clever top of the fridge as a shelf storage ideas? It's a muck up there and we hate it! The cuter the better! *Storing this stuff elsewhere does not work. In the last year and a half we've tried. It migrates back.


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|Armand Thierry jacket (similar here), Levi's Curve ID straight jeans, Gate t-shirt, Deichmann shoes (similar here), Dorothy Perkins clutch (similar here), Marks&Spencer sunglasses (similar here), Forever 21 bangle
This Chanel-inspired jacket is definitely one of the most versatile pieces in my closet. It looks equally fabulous with a pair of jeans, as it does with a pencil skirt or thrown over an LBD. I remember that when I was working for the European Commission in Brussels, I wore it almost every week. That's why I'm a little bit ashamed to admit that I completely forgot that I had it! I only rediscovered it last week, when I started to edit my wardrobe. My excuse is that ever since I started to work from home, a huge part of my "corporate" wardrobe has been sleeping in my closet, waiting for its next chance to make its appearance. But not anymore: I'm planning to add more classy and chic elements (jackets, shirts, blazers and pearls) to my day-to-day outfits. This chic jacket paired with my DIY boyfriend jeans (I simply rolled up the hems on my favorite straight jeans), floral heels and beachy waves, made just for the perfect outfit for a Sunday walk in town.


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Shop by category
PVC clothing is a bold, fashion-forward style. This versatile material can create a patent leather look without the hefty price tag. It is also an ideal material choice for on-trend metallic pieces. You can find a wide array of PVC skirts, cat suits, dresses, tops and more.
PVC is also a very practical material, due to its water-resistant and wipe-clean properties; it is widely used for raincoats, aprons, and bags. Infuse your wardrobe with some PVC style.


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* I have marked sections/parts/sentences that were referenced or derived from the book referenced here with an asterisk including the page number.
I recently (and synchronistically) received a document from a friend I had lost touch with over the last 3 years. Greg attached a pdf document entitled "Sirenames" . On opening this document, it presents a well-researched history of "Names" and was printed some time in 1860's. It is titled "SURNAMES & SIRENAMES. THE ORIGIN AND HISTORY OF CERTAIN FAMILY & HISTORICAL NAMES: With REMARKS ON THE ANCIENT RIGHT OF THE CROWN TO SANCTION AND VETO THE ASSUMPTION OF NAMES and AN HISTORICAL ACCOUNT OF THE NAMES BUGGEY AND BUGG." BY JAMES FINLAYSON. * (pg 22 – it would seem it was written in 1863 "This was the law in 1160, the same law was held as binding in 1290, and it ought to be so held in 1863."
This document when considered in the context of what we know about the legal name, will (unfortunately for some) burst all the bubbles of the "freeman" and "Sovereignty" movements where the general consensus is that we have a "Legal fiction" name and a "private name" and that somehow and by some process we can access a TRUST of some sort and that we as beneficiaries are being denied access to it. There is also a consensus (which I too admittedly believed), that the correct process could free us from this matrix by rejecting contracts in the fiction name whilst simultaneously claiming its benefits. The fact of the matter is, and the essay title of sorts referenced above will make it ABUNDANTLY clear that the FICTION name is a FRAUD from beginning to finish. It will make it clear that you should have NOTHING TO DO with this fraud and that it never had and never will have anything to do with YOU.
Kate of Gaia can genuinely now say. "I told ya so"…and she may even throw in "you left brained monkeys!" for our entertainment. 🙂
You may also begin to see that any resistance by the courts is FEIGNED resistance to make you beLIEve that there is credence to the freeman and sovereignty argument. This is how they keep you IN the SYSTEM searching for a "solution" when there is none. If you don't want your bubble burst and you want to continue playing in the matrix, then by all means…stop reading.
It is argued in the book referenced above, that the Ancient right of || the Crown and Parliament to grant license and have a prescriptive right to sanction all assumptive surnames before they can be considered legal * (pg 22) , and that any such sanctions should be carefully considered for its implications from the perspective that *a man's name is a man's property, just as much as houses and lands are property.* (Introduction. Pg3)
He gives a detailed & historical account of sire-names and surnames, their antiquity, purpose, use and abuse.
It is important to understand this, so that you may fully comprehend how you participate IN A FRAUD (which was in some parts of the world punishable by death) every time you use a name that is LICENSED to someone else, namely the State.
First, let's establish some historical facts, then we'll examine the modern use of the name. Hopefully this will serve to create a clearer picture from which you will be able to "see" the MAGNITUDE of the FRAUD you are in participating in when you assume the LEGAL NAME, including the magnitude of the FRAUD perpetuated AGAINST YOU by CRIMINALS of the highest order.
It outlines and points to a well-known fact that *every person of any position, even in the most barbarous of ages, has had at least two names* (pg. 8) and no; it's not your "LEGAL" name and your "PRIVATE" name. * The first being that which the person would be known amongst his family (the private name), otherwise known as a home name.* (pg 8) In my case for instance, my family and friends know me as Rena. This is a prototype of my Christian name being Irini or Irene.
However, as we "come of age" and *embark in the turmoils of life, another name would be given either from a personal defect, some characteristic trait, or from circumstances by which one would be known among his own people, a public name. This name became the first and most honoured surname of the bearer.* (pg 8)
*" I, THE LORD, HAVE EVEN CALLED THEE BY THAT NAME. I HAVE SURNAMED THEE." Isaiah xiv.4.*(front cover title page)
These "public names" could convey information about broad genealogical lineage as well as a certain individuals personality or physical characteristics.
For instance, GEORGIOU imbues a child or individual with the lineage having come from a family of landowners as farmers; whereas if the same name where preceded with PAPA to make the surname PAPAGEORGIOU, it now describes the same lineage with the additional information being an ancestry of priesthood.
Surnames, Sire-names & Family Names were often used in combination to precisely describe the individual in question.
*Mons. A. Bockh deciphered a contract of sale effected in Egypt , which bore the names of the contracting parties, being not only described in the deeds by their proper names, but by a detailed description of their physical peculiarities. (Salverte, 67.)* (pg. 5 – introduction)
In commerce, a good name was paramount in which a good name gave real value to a contract or agreement.
The usage of a proper names was also paramount in recognising kin and the same stringent laws were enforced by the Court of Chivalry, or *sanctioned by the Earl Marshal's Court, particularly on the occasion of Jousts and Tournaments which debarred any person from entering chivalry, who had dared to take upon himself the surname of another illegally or without Crown sanction or license. Not only this, but no Knight of France, Scotland, or Spain, would demean himself by raising a lance with a man who bore not his lawful name and arms. From these instances of fact, the writings in the book referenced above conclude to prove that this usage was established and recognized by the King in the year 1106.* (pg 22)
In matters of honour, a name served to remind people, *with perfect accuracy of detail, of the various events which had led either to a firm alliance or to deadly enmity between two tribes. Such was the influence of their recollections, that two warrior chiefs who chanced to meet in battle would conceal their names, lest they should be suggestive of some common tie of kin or friendship, which might furnish an excuse for avoiding the encounter. * (pg 17)
*A still more honourable fear dictated a rule, that no stranger who claimed hospitality should be asked his name before the expiration of three whole days, under pain of the most severe punishment the law could inflict. During that time, all hereditary hatred that a name might rekindle had to lie dormant. During that time a generous hospitality had to take the place of a thirst for revenge.* (pg 17)
*The most notable instance is that of the exchange of the name of Bugg for Howard. Mr. Bugg could not have been aware of the origin of his name, for if he had been, he might have exchanged it for one out of many to which he had an undoubted right, without infringing, as he clearly had done, upon the property of a noble house "for a man's name is a man's property, just as much as houses and lands are property."* (Introduction pg 3)
*"there are three crowns—the crown of the law, the crown of the priesthood, and the Crown of Royalty; but the Crown of a good name is superior to them all." Talmud.* (Title pg)
*The idea that a man may assume what surname and as many surnames as he pleases is erroneous, where to affect that change is a confession of wrong in the event that it is not ancestral. * (pg 24)
In our times, a man can change his name indiscriminately and at any time, for any reason by simply making the application and paying the appropriate fee. This should in the very least raise alarm as to why the free trade of name changes are bordering on the prostitution of names. A far cry from times past.
*The illegal and unsanctioned assumption of names was not even tolerated in the days of Shakespeare, where in the play "Taming of the Shrew.'' He says: Petrucio.—" Why, how now gentleman ! why, this is flat knavery, to take upon him another man's name."—Act. 5. Sc. 1.* (pg 24)
It was further held to be unlawful to assume a name that was unsanctioned or illegal for the purpose of protecting a good name.
*As soon as a woman had become the mere toy of public debauchery, it was enacted by law that she should change her name. It was taken for granted that she had only been reduced to such a state of disgrace by some kind of force, and it was not thought right that she should prostitute both her person and the name which allied her to some honourable family. * (pg 26)
Today most people assume that the birth of a living child is a registrable event. The birth IS NOT the registrable event. The Birth event and the Birth registration are two DISTINCT and explicitly separate events. The criminals however, use this opportune moment to obtain a sanctioned License in the form of a DERIVATIVE of the NAME from your parents amidst the excitement and confusion of this wonderful joyous event.
Our existing Statutes requiring such a registration, are causing in fact to make what was, and has been accepted as a CRIME for millennia, LAW. The CRIME of deceiving a sovereign into granting SANCTION to a NAME that the licensee will with malice and aforethought use to COMMIT FRAUD.
This is the modern equivalent of a commoner assuming by SANCTIONED LICENSE from a SOVEREIGN the surname of ROYALTY for the sole purpose of claiming by NAME and therefore by ANCESTARY and FACT - a pecuniary interest in the estate of the sovereign; Effectively giving the deceitful licensee rights to the ancestral genetic property (body), characteristics and DEEDS (titles etc), and the PHYSICAL properties of the surname (the material wealth acquired by that sire-name).
The Birth Certificate application does not ask your parents for your family sire-name or patronymic name. Instead of the dignity and honour of your family sire-name, the state only asks for your GIVEN name but then ADDS your FAMILY name and encourages you to use it as a SURNAME. The State has effectively created a license for itself for the ASSUMED NAME, which you throughout your lifetime assume as your own.
It was decreed that people *were not bound to recognise the illegal assumption of a name.* (pg 27)
A name without Royal license or sanctioning was by all accounts illegal and *no amount of twisting the law bound others to accept that assumption.* (pg 27)
It was believed and it remains true to this day that "Free Trade" in names would be detrimental to society at large. *What right has any man to the property of another? A family name is an inseparably invested property.* (pg 28)
You only need to look at today's strict trademark laws that punish enterprising criminals who attempt to use a name to trade off of the good name of a well-known brand, even if by loose association.
However, *Genealogy in name (illegally assumed), implies Surnames such in fact; that if an abuse of this nature is tolerated, it will eventually become a serious difficulty as the custodians of their own good names would be inflicted a great injustice upon those families* (pg 28) who might unfortunately happen to have their name stolen or prostituted.
*Convicts* for instance, who sought to assume a new name to escape their past and *make a new course of life* (pg 25) , sought to procure a license from the Sovereign to change their name. *In France an express law relative to the false assumption of surnames and changes of names was enacted (II. Germinal of the year XI);
Art. IV.—Every person who has any reason for changing his name, shall address a demand to Government stating his motives.
Art. V.—The Government shall decide in the form prescribed by the regulations of public administrations.
The Prussian provincial law (Landrecht), part ii., The Law title xx., s. 14, 406, enacts, "Whoever, even without illegal intention, assumes a family name, or arms without right, shall be forbidden the assumption under pain of an arbitrary, but express fine and this punishment, in case of transgression, shall be readily awarded to him."
A Decree of the 30th October, 1816 also enacts " Since experience has taught us that the bearing of assumed or invented names is injurious to the security of civil intercourse, as well as to the efficiency of the police force, we hereby order the following :
1. No one shall under pain of a fine of from five to fifty thalers, or of a proportionate imprisonment, make use of a name which does not belong to him.
2. If this assumption * (pg 25) *or invention of a name takes place with intent to deceive, the regulations of the general penal law come into force."
There is also a Royal Cabinet order of the 15th of April, 1822 to the effect, that no one may alter his family or general name without permission of the Sovereign.
"I (The King) do not consider it necessary, on the report of the Ministry of the 27th of March, to promulgate any further decree on the unchangeableness of family or general names, but determine hereby that no one shall be allowed to alter his family or general name without permission of the Sovereign, under pain of a fine of fifty thalers or four weeks' imprisonment, even where the act does not proceed from any unlawful intention." Coll. of Laws of 1822, No. 7.,S. 108.
In Scotland, formerly, the false assumption of a Sire-name was equal to the false assumption of coat armour, which was punished as forgery. On reference to Brown's Pari. Cases, p. 194, or to the Archceologia Papers, vol. 18, p. Ill, it will be found that the decision of Sir Joseph Jekyll to allow the assumed use of a name was reversed by the House of Lords. The Peers said upon their deciding the matter, "that the individual ought to have inherited by birth, or have obtained an Assumptive AUTHORITY for using the name"* (pg 26)
So what does all this mean in terms of your birth certificate, the NAME fraud and the crime you are committing & perpetuating against not only yourself, but your ancestors?
Instead of history, let's now fast forward into today's use of the name.
As many of you may already be aware, the system we are being ruled and governed under is not what we all think it is. It has very little to do with the elected members of the parliament because the Governance of the land mass we refer to as Australia, is a Corporate Business Trust and is therefore under the same rules that control international commerce, the Carriage of Goods by Sea Act 1936 US, Hague-Visby Rules and the Uniform Commercial Code.
This is true by virtue of the fact that the business trust, being the COMMONWEALTH OF AUSTRALIA is registered in the District of Columbia as a foreign corporation with the United States Securities and Exchange Commission, making also what we refer to as States - quasi States; since they too are registered in the District of Columbia.
These States then require by Statute the registration of a Live born. The Birth Registration form IS NOT the registration/declaration of a LIVE BORN creation of source, but is the granting of a license to the COMMONWEALTH OF AUSTRALIA to use a derivative of your sire-name as a PUBLIC ENTITY for the exclusive use of the COMMONWEALTH OF AUSTRALIA and their quasi states. Your parents being the sovereigns (kings or queens) granting sanction to its use and license.
More precisely, the State licenses a derivative of your sire-name, with the sanctioning being obtained via your parents through the Birth Registration form. Your parents inadvertently participate in the States (usually successful) attempt to deny you your incorporeal and corporeal hereditaments of your ancestors' personal and property rights. Your parents are then led to believe that the derivative license of the name and YOU are one in the same thing.
This belief serves to have you accept that you are the product of the political subdivision of the sovereign state of the Commonwealth of Australia, giving you, the living man/woman ONLY the LEGAL rights and title to your personal property.
Your LEGAL rights are bound within the same parameters as those that govern the COMMONWEALTH OF AUSTRALIA...and since you have ASSUMED A NAME that is LICENSED to the State, you too accept to be governed within the LEGAL bounds of the COMMONWEALTH OF AUSTRALIA because YOU have bound yourself to the LICENSED NAME.
When however, you use your ancestral name and not the name LICENSED to the State, you are not restricted to the legal bounds of the COMMONWEALTH OF AUSTRALIA. In any case the use of a NAME LICENSED TO ANOTHER (in this case the state) is CLEARLY currently AND historically a criminal offense.
You may wonder however, how the state derives any benefit from licensing a derivative of your ancestral or sire-name? The very things that made it illegal and punishable historically to use an unsanctioned name also applies today, namely the use of a sire-name to gain pecuniary interest in any ancestral estate, in other words to exact FRAUD. This is evident by virtue of the fact that the separate quasi states use the license of the assumed name, which was obtained from your parents, WITH THE INTENT TO DECIEVE AND COMMIT FRAUD via its eventual use as collateral to back state debts when they access funds on the Capital Markets off-shore.
The license is valuable collateral because almost 100% of the population will fall for the name scam by agreeing to utilise the ASSUMED NAME licensed by the state, thus you assume BOTH the role of obligor to the state debts AND the role of he who AIDS & ABETS the FRAUD by using an unsanctioned and illegal name licensed to the STATE, NOT YOU!
Again, I repeat for your benefit that the criminals use the opportune moment of your birth, amidst the excitement and confusion of this joyous event to obtain a sanctioned LICENSE in the form of a DERIVATIVE of the NAME from your parents. The STATE is secure in the knowledge for the continuance of the scam since your parents will forever TIE the BIRTH CERTIFICATE, to the event of your birth, instead of the REAL event, which is was the STATES LICENSING of an ASSUMED NAME SANCTIONED by your parents.
The issuance of a BIRTH CERTIFICATE is the issuance of a RECIEPT verifying THE AGREEMENT to allowing the derivative of your Sire-name to be licensed by the state. The details completed by your parents GIVE the derivative that they are LICENSING to the state. The purpose of encouraging you to USE this name is many-fold.
1.YOU become a willing participant and party to the use of a name NOT licensed to you, but licensed to the State - A criminal has zero standing in accusing another of the same crime.
1.The State has licensed a name that has no LIVING representative of that CORPORATE FICTION NAME they have acquired a license to. They need a LIVING man or WOMAN to perpetrate the CRIME against the NAME, the sire-name, so that they can extract the wealth and benefits through the ASSUMED NAME for and on behalf of the State which has LICENSED said name.
2.Since appointing a representative with no apparent connection to the ASSUMED NAME would make it OBVIOUS that the purpose of the birth registration and birth certificate is to gain a LICENSE. The States coerces you from an early age to ALWAYS use your SURNAME (the license), never your family name, sire-name etc , so that it eventually becomes habitual to the extent that you equate this licensed name as YOU.
3.Your consistent use of a name NOT licensed to you, is designed to implicate you in the CRIME of using an ASSUMED NAME WITHOUT LICENSE. YOU are now a CRIMINAL with NO protection of your true ancestral name, heritage or the LAW.
It was the intent of the state to coerce and deceive your parents in the granting of the licence for an ASSUMED NAME for the purpose of obtaining pecuniary interest from the patronymic ESTATE and PROPERTY, directly FROM THE DESCENDANT THEMSELVES, whilst at the same time encouraging and insisting on your use of an UNLICENSED ASSUMED NAME in order to implicate you in the CRIME of AIDING & ABETTING the FRAUD.
REFUSING the NAME not licensed to you is YOUR DUTY. Revoking the LICENSE or not PERMITTING its use in connection with YOU is not only your RIGHT since it was borne in FRAUD, but your DUTY in protecting the good name of your ancestors.
The Babylon whore should be more aptly named the BABYLON PIMP. The PIMP feeds the lustful greed ONLY by furnishing the name. It is up to the prostitute to fulfil the duty of the name, by answering to it and furnishing it with a "body". It stands to reason then, that when we present our "bodies" in service to the name, it is WE who become the prostitute in service the Babylon PIMP.
We all inadvertently become collectively or individually the Babylon Whores when we assume the name FRAUD.
By rena from the sire-name Georgiou and family Iliades, sometimes known as mincess, kepala pisang or chicken legs 🙂
Resources & References: SURNAMES & SIRENAMES. THE ORIGIN AND HISTORY OF CERTAIN FAMILY & HISTORICAL NAMES: With REMARKS ON THE ANCIENT RIGHT OF THE CROWN TO SANCTION AND VETO THE ASSUMPTION OF NAMES and AN HISTORICAL ACCOUNT OF THE NAMES BUGGEY AND BUGG. - BY JAMES FINLAYSON.
The Sire Name Fraud (audio/video) with additional commentary.
Kate of Gaia official web site http://kateofgaia.wordpress.com & original document is here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BxeQ2V9n4rw&feature=youtu.be
OUTSIDE OF THE BOX FORUM – CRITICAL MASS RADIO - http://www.blogtalkradio.com/criticalmassradioonline/2014/06/29/outside-the-box-open-forum
Kate's KIDS Forum http://kateskidskove.wordpress.com


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European iGaming Congress
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The 10th Annual European iGaming Congress and Expo (EiG) is just around the corner and this year, it's gonna be in the at the Milano Convention Centre in Milan, Italy from 19th September to 22nd September.
As one of the largest expos in the iGaming calendar, last year's EiG attracted approximately 1500 attendees from all areas of the industry, from Senior Management to specialists in a number of areas including business development, fraud, IT, law, finance, payments, regulation, and marketing.
35 of the eGaming Review's Power 50 were in attendance as the event was predominantly western European dominated.
This year, you'll hear Global iGaming CEOs identify the future winners of the newly regulated, consolidating and increasingly localized iGaming market. You'll find out what new markets are likely to open up and influence the creation of regulatory frameworks in Europe so they benefit the States, the industry, and the players.
Platform convergence will be touched to find out the best practice in cross selling and up selling your iGaming content across various channels and provide a smooth and enjoyable experience offline, online, mobile, on TV. Learn from outside and inside industry experts how to create a customer-centric gaming environment, segment your customers and identify the right ones to retain.
It's no coincidence this high-level and long running event is taking place in Italy this year, currently Europe's fastest growing market. It's expected to continue flourishing with the new regulations being introduced to allow for cash poker and casino games. Both global brands, now on the drive to consolidate to build scale allowing them to enter the regulated markets, and local Italian organizations from gaming and non-gaming sectors are all eyeing the opportunity and taking steps to secure a share of this lucrative market.
Top-level executives from Gioco Digitale, Poste Mobile and Lottomatica will be present to discuss their approach in their local markets with the CEOs of global brands such as William Hill Online, bwin.party digital entertainment Betclic Everest Group, Virgin Games, PKR and Bodog. They will try to explore potential partnerships, identify key industry trends, influence further market and regulatory developments, and predict the future leaders and to make sure they are one of them.
Paolo di Feo, bwin.party, Southern Region Director (Italy, France, Spain, Portugal and Latin America), part of the recently merged global iGaming operator bwin.party, commented on his involvement in EiG: "We're excited that EiG is coming to Italy this year. Hosting an event as important as EiG is without a doubt a testimony to Italy's appeal to the global gaming industry."
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The Atlantic Center for the Arts in New Smyrna Beach will present Medea at 6:30 p.m. today and Saturday at the center's amphitheater, 1414 Art Center Ave.
Medea is the culminating event for the center's 18th session with master artists-in-residence Vinnette Carroll, director, H.B. Barnum, composer, and Talley Beatty, choreographer. Nineteen other associates will participate in acting and dancing roles.


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Author: Jennifer Armentrout
Edition: Paperback
Published: May 6, 2013
Publisher: Spencer Hill Press
Pages: 62
Source: Bought from Fullybooked
Category: Romance, Paranormal
Trailer: Not applicable.
Amazon ▲ Book Depository ▲ Goodreads ▲ Barnes and Noble ▲ Fullybooked
Synopsis:Louisse Ang created the JLA Twitter and Facebook Fanpage, it really made me think that I probably be missing so much in life. She isn't only a die hard fan but she totally loves JLA. So I thought, why not get copies of JLA books and see what the fuss is all about myself. Today my friends, I read the prequel novella of Half Blood, and I am absolutely impressed.
For three years, Alexandria has lived among mortals—pretending to be like them and trying to forget the duty she'd been trained to fulfill as a child of a mortal and a demigod. At seventeen, she's pretty much accepted that she's a freak by mortal standards… and that she'll never be prepared for that duty.
According to her mother, that's a good thing.
But as every descendant of the gods knows, Fate has a way of rearing her ugly head. A horrifying attack forces Alex to flee Miami and try to find her way back to the very place her mother had warned her she should never return—the Covenant. Every step that brings her closer to safety is one more step toward death… because she's being hunted by the very creatures she'd once trained to kill.
The daimons have found her.
Daimon is just a 62-page novella (thankfully it is printed) and way cheaper than the novels itself. In 62 pages, Armentrout made me want to start readathoning her series in an instant. Daimon is intense, action-packed, emotional and intriguing. This I hope is a glimpse to a masterpiece worth all the money I spent (am only lacking Sentinel). It has what I want most in a novel: kick ass heroine, cinematic world building, promising romance and light and quirky prose. Goodness, I really cant wait to start reading Half Blood and see more.
I think I read it at the wrong and right time.Wrong time because I just had a misunderstanding with my mother and the gruesome thing happened here isn't really the right thing for me to visualize at the moment. But right time because it made me love my own mother more. What thing can be more beautiful than that? Also, I loved Alex. She isn't afraid to do the correct thing even if it is against what she feels. I adored how she tries to save Red even if he tried to rob her. And who is the mysterious guy Alex might not be able to see again? I loved this prequel to bits!
Daimon is the best prequel for a series I am afraid I wouldn't love. It gave me the right amount of wanting. I want to read Half Blood right after I finished Daimon and the thrilling ending is enough to torture me to want for more! 62 pages worth of action and emotion I couldn't find anywhere else! Armentrout, just so you know, you impressed me!
"Damn girl. Is your daddy a thief?"
I'd never actually met my dad. Maybe he was. All I knew was that he'd been mortal. Hopefully, he'd been nothing like these two ass-hats. Ren flexed his nonexistent muscles, smiling.
"Well, then who stole those diamonds and put them in your eyes?"
"Normal girls didn't want their boobs mauled either, and I wholly believed if they could've landed a fist like I could, they would have."


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- AnxietyBC STRIDES Summer 2016 Newsletter
AnxietyBC STRIDES Summer 2016 Newsletter
In this July issue of Strides, we introduce our newly elected volunteer Board of Directors. The much anticipated updated version of the MindShift app is now available for free downloads. For your reading pleasure, we are pleased to share our Top 5 Facebook articles and YouTube videos. A special thanks to those who contributed to our Spring online surveys; read on for results from the User Preferences Survey.
At AnxietyBC we know how busy you are, so we have pared down our Strides e-newsletter. In this issue we bring you only the highlights of what has been keeping us busy.


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You should be18 years old or above and have spent more than 48 hour outside the city state. Additional rules to enjoy the concession is the liquor itself should not be in the list of banned products in Singapore. If you're coming from Malaysia, either by sea, land or air route, do not expect any duty-free for liquor.
For those entering Singapore, you can have 3 options in-terms of maximizing the 3 liters allowed under duty-free. It can be a combination of 1 liter each of beer, wine and spirit. By the way, 1 liter of beer usually comes as 3 beers-in-can. Other combination exists such as 1 liter of wine and 2 liters of beer or vice versa.


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Seeking Partners for a Start-Up Virtual World (Los Angeles)
Second Life, Club Penguin, Neopets, Twinity...the list goes on and on. Virtual Worlds are the new "it" topic of interactive social networking.
Here in my hometown, good ol' Los Angeles, I'm in the early phases of developing a new and unique virtual world. At the onset, I'm seeking some highly talented concept artists to help define the "look" of the world, and some savvy MBA's to help with the business plan in preparation for a fast and furious pitch to a network of VC's and private financiers. If this sounds like something you're interested in, let's talk. I'm on a mission to fast-track this project in Protected content the timing couldn't be more perfect to get this site into beta phase.
Have a wonderful day,
Matt Parker


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2017 Good Governance Report – the great governance debate continues!
John Gollifer discusses the purpose of the Good Governance Report published this week by the Institute of Directors.
This week the Institute of Directors (IoD) launched its third Good Governance Report.
Well done to all of you who are in the list of 100 or so companies based on the FTSE100. For all of you, including those who don't feature in the list, it may well be useful to understand the purpose of the Report and what is behind it. In the words of Ken Olisa, Chairman of the Advisory Panel and Deputy Chair of the IoD, 'Although, as with all league tables, it is tempting to draw comparisons between the highest and lowest entries, this is to miss the power of our approach. From any Board's perspective, the Good Governance Index's power comes not from any intra-league comparisons, but by a thoughtful analysis of the 47 instrumental factors and their relevance to their own competitive position'.
The Good Governance Index is calculated by looking at how companies score across 47 governance indicators. These indicators are grouped into five broad categories of corporate governance: Board effectiveness; Audit and Risk/External Accountability; Remuneration and Reward; Shareholder Relations; and Stakeholder Relations.
To their credit, since starting the Index, the IoD have increased the number of governance indicators to try and reflect the rather broad scope of corporate behaviour, not an easy task given every company is different!
Importantly, one conclusion the IoD make is that there is no particular correlation between the Index score and company size. Like IR, it is really down to you, the companies, to find the best way to continue to build your own capacity in response to the competitive environment that you operate in and to manage expectations and indeed, the perceptions of your target audiences. If nothing else, join the debate and let the IoD know what you think.
Published 11 October, 2017


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Instead Of Buying A House Couple Buys A Mercedes Vito And Converted It To Our Rolling Home
Categories: Mobility, TinyHouse
Belgian couple, named Jolien en Karel, both 26. She is a starter architect and he is an electrical engineer. Instead of buying a house and settle down like almost all of their friends, they decided to buy a mercedes-benz vito and transform it to our first home.
The big plan for them is to leave Belgium, and to travel and spend their life on the road.
The van was bought in December and now it's almost finished. They have put almost 200 man hours into their remodel. Happy travels...
via BoredPanda