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Wolfpack Blank Colonels
NC State continued to NOT make headlines this week as they took care of business at home against Eastern Kentucky. Though they are a ranked team in the FCS, the Wolfpack should not and did not have much trouble with the Colonels. Oh and they also wore those nifty black alternates.
Game Recap
Ok, so NC State had a little bit of trouble with EKU. In the first drive of the game, it looked like maybe the Colonels could hang around. After barely converting on 3rd and 20, the Wolfpack made it down to the goal line. Then, the wheels fell off. Matt Dayes was stopped for no gain and Brissett could only get back to the line. Facing a 3rd and goal from the 5 after a false start, Brissett failed to avoid the pass rush and was sacked. So the Wolfpack settled for a field goal…except no, the kick was blocked. The entire NC State fanbase groaned in unison and prepared for a long game.
The defense forced a 3 and out, but the offense continued to disappoint. Dakwa Nichols fumbled as he got to midfield as Eastern Kentucky caught yet another break. At the end of the first quarter, the game was inexplicably tied at 0. Things got better though. NC State started the quarter in EKU territory and Brissett took over. He eventually found Benson Browne in the end zone to put the Wolfpack on the board.
On the next drive, Brissett and Dayes alternated plays to march the team all the way down to the goal line where Jaylen Samuels ran it in for the score.
NC State would take their 14-0 lead into the half. They picked up where they left off to open the half. Samuels caught a pass and brought State to the red zone. Matt Dayes then ran for 25 yards and his first of three TDs.
The rest of the game went mostly to plan. Dayes and Brissett continued to tear up the EKU defense and on the other side, the Wolfpack defense ended up shutting out the Colonels for a 35-0 victory.
Of course it was against an FCS team, but the combination of Jacoby Brissett and Matt Dayes looked unstoppable again this week. Troy couldn't handle them, and Eastern Kentucky had no answer for the two. Both did what they wanted basically the whole game. Going forward, it's nice to know what they are capable of. There's a lot to be excited about on offense if they can continue this play into the conference schedule.
The defense looked better this week. With the exception of a few early drives, they kept the Colonels out of the red zone the entire game. Hopefully this is the real NC State defense. The version of this defense we saw last week was largely ineffective against a sub-par Troy offense. At times, they even carried the team notably in the first quarter when the offense was stagnant. They looked much better this week and hopefully that kind of play is here to stay, but it's too soon to tell.
Gif Reaction
It's hard to get excited yet because of the weak schedule, but it's hard to complain when you're 2-0. Offense looks good, defense looks adequate, way to go NC State. Let's keep these games one-sided.


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When we left the hospital in 2012, with a broken-heart with no ideas of what to do. We were handed a cardboard butter box, with some of her items; with some leaflets that weren't really relevant to our loss. The counselling support they gave us wasn't helpful either. The sessions were in the G.U.M clinic; in the very back of the hospital, the avoidance of speaking about her began.
We learned as time went on that there simply isn't the right support out there for us; we are regularly met with our baby is too old, or too young; or that she didn't die the right way. She fell in a limbo area.
Support behind the screen
It became difficult to speak face to face to people, they were uncomfortable, or simple a lack of understanding. I turned to support from the internet, I have made some wonderful friends; we supported each other through the very darkest of times. But I knew from very early on I would want to give more; to help others, especially for those who were of similar loss to us.
Loneliness and lack of support has been one of the harder parts of this journey. It shouldn't be the hardest solely should be the death of your child.
Little Daffodils
Originally Melody's Voices was born after a discussion with a local midwife, who had a project which was to include a Pregnancy and Infant Loss group. After becoming a little nervous, I contacted the charity Towards Tomorrow Together; we worked together to make sure everything runs smoothly. Another Mum assists at the groups, we have a great resource, we're still a long way to go; but we're getting there.
Upon returning from The Butterfly Awards in 2016, it dawned on me how little support there is in my area, particularly for Neonatal and Post Neonatal loss, so the change of name from Melody's voices to Little Daffodils, meant I can still name the group after Melody (they're her flowers), but as a bigger picture it will hopefully come to mean something to people, to parents and their families.

subset: commoncrawl


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The lovely and beautiful Mackenzie brought her ideas and pictures to me a few months ago and we started brainstorming, shopping, and sewing. It took some time but we were finally on track to get a couple adorable outfits done for her and her daughter. Then life happened, weather happened, etc, and we got sidetracked. Knowing the weather wasn't going to cooperate with us much longer, I set out to finish her dress. It was a remake of a 1950's pattern, and "supposedly" had been resized to be current. Ha. There was NO way she, or I, would fit into the top I sewed. So I embarked on an endeavor to get a new pattern. Something JoAnn Fabrics does not like to assist with. But persistence won out (it was a $17 pattern!), and I recut and resewed the top 4 sizes bigger. Much better. We picked a day that looked like it would be tolerable and met at two separate locations, one for her and her current ride, and one for her and her daughter. The weather held for us and as long as we let sweet "E" go in and warm up every so often, we managed to avoid the 'rudolph's red nose' look. I LOVE the way they turned out, and the dedication Mackenzie had in pulling it all together!
Two Beauties and a Sewing Adventure
+ Add Your Voice


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The Vice President, of the federal republic of Nigeria, Professor Yemi Osinbajo, has called on foreign investors to invest in Nigeria, adding that the country is the investment destination for Africa.
He made this known at the commissioning of the second phase expansion project and laying of foundation stone for the third phase expansion project of Beloxxi Industries Ltd in Agbara, Ogun state adding that the country has become an easier place of doing business.
The Vice president explained " I remember a year ago before MTN came into Nigeria, there are several investors who thought, What is communication in Nigeria ? And thought it wasn't going to work. MTN therefore committed its self into Nigeria and when people saw what MTN could do in a few short years all of those who didn't invest in Nigeria, am sure regretted across the capitals of the world."
He said "I want to urge foreign investors that with the way this country is going, Nigeria will not be recognizable in terms of infrastructure in the next few years. This is the country to come in for investment."
Osinbanjo also said the policy laboratory, launched on February 6th,2018 was to accelerate the intervention of the Economic Recovery and Growth Plan (ERGP).
According to the vice president , the laboratory is a euphemism that describes a relationship between the public, private sector."It would also involve some other stakeholders coming together in a room to look at how they could look at problems, plan together, and resolve problems in investments in specific areas.
Some of the areas we intend to look at in our laboratory include oil and gas, manufacturing and processing, agriculture and transport.
The goal of this lab is to generate $24 billion worth of investment, 80 percent is expected from the private sector with 15 million jobs and a projected Gross Domestic Product (GDP) growth of 3.5 per cent this year and seven percent growth by 2020."he said.
Osinbajo commended the founder of Beloxxi, Mr Obi Ezuede for his achievement in the manufacturing sector and said that the government looks forward to collaborating with Beloxxi Industries across the platform to ensure economic growth and job creation.
"I must also say that President Buhari's administration is fully committed to providing funds to both hard and soft infrastructures in other to support companies such as Beloxxi Industries and others which will spur growth and create jobs within the economy." He said.
Furthermore, He also urged other indigenous manufacturers and businesses to ensure that they commit to Nigeria's future, keep on investing and pushing the frontiers of local businesses.
Also at the event, The Managing Director of the Nigerian Export and Import Bank (NEXIM), Mr Abba Bello disclosed that the bank's mandate as an agency of the Federal Government is to grow the non-oil export by participating in financing it.
The Executive director in charge of Large Enterprises Division for Bank of Industry, Simon Aranonu also said the Bank of Industry is set to support genuine manufacturers would take the kind of initiative that this company has started to produce locally, to feed Nigerians and create job opportunities for the nation's teeming unemployed youths.


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Main Content:
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Discover an exceptional collection of fashion accessories at Banana Republic today.


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What you need to start home business will vary hugely depending on you, your home business idea and many other factors in your circumstances.
If you feel nervous, anxious or even confused about what you need to do to start a home business - you are not alone!
Starting your own home based business is a big new challenge for most people who pluck up the courage to actually get going!
Anything new can be scary, but everything can be achieved by taking small manageable steps.
There is a lot to learn when planning and running a business but it doesn't have to be difficult. Learn as you go, and get as much help as you can.
Learn how and where to start a small business,
and live your dream of freedom.
Really the first thing you need to do is plan.
You have probably done a lot of this in your head initially - but as you get closer to setting up you will need to put at least some of the start home business plan on to paper.
I am not talking about a proper business plan - such as you might learn in a business class or text book. Although this would also have some merit, you need to start by getting your ideas from your head to some paper.
It might just be some handwritten notes, but having something written down will allow you to get it clear in your head before you start taking the first steps.
Learn business principles and you will discover the core foundation of any business venture you use as your vehicle for great wealth. Learn the principles of business to set yourself up for home based business success.
Once you have written down as much as you can possibly think of about what is involved to start home business, then you need to decide what needs to happen first.
Often when we take on a new challenge it is a bit like a giant jigsaw. Each piece of our plan has to fit with the other pieces around it before the big picture takes shape.
You need to determine what you should organize first. This is actually quite critical as if you forget something significant then your whole business launch could be delayed.
For example, if you have decided that you need to move to a house that is better suited to a home business, then this may need to be resolved first before anything else.
Maybe you simply need to rearrange your house so you can start.
Or perhaps you need to purchase a some essential equipment first.
Prioritize what you need to do with a list of jobs. Don't be afraid to move items around on your list so that one job doesn't hold up everything else.
You will probably have a number of jobs from your list on the go at once. This is good use of time so that many jobs will be ticked off quickly.
Sometimes you will find that you have a genuine hold up due to unforeseen circumstances. e.g. perhaps a vital piece of equipment is out of stock when you order it, so you have to wait.
I know this sounds really basic advice, but as you break down your list of jobs into simple steps the daunting task of a start home business becomes easy. What started out as a big task will be slowly chipped away until you are ready!


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Photos from early time of United States. Part 2.
The 20th century was a time of enormous changes in American life. In our previous post we published for you some photos from early time of United States. Especially pleasant is that the photos are rather high quality and resolution, allows us to reviewing the smallest details.


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February 16, 2010 (CHICAGO) --A Chicago family is desperate for information about a relative who has been missing for more than a month.Police re-issued a missing person's alert Tuesday for 47-year-old Carmelita Johnson.
Johnson was last seen on January 5th near 55th and Seeley Avenue in the West Englewood neighborhood.
Johnson is about 5 feet 6 inches tall and walks with a limp.
Anyone who may have seen her should call Chicago Police.


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While enjoying the most beautiful morning outside with lil Nugget I felt compelled to compile a "cant live without" list for backyard playin!
- Spray sunscreen is the shiz for wiggly jiggly toddlers who would never sit still to have actual lotion rubbed on. So much less mess, by the way.
- Crocs. Thats right. Not seen as the most "fashionable" choice in the world but so so practical. We couldn't live without crocs for the Nugget. No drying time when they get wet, they dont stain, more protection against stubbed toes then flip flops offer, and best of all they are just so easy. From very little on kiddos can put them on themselves. These are MUST BUY for backyard playing in our house.
- Buckets! Tons and tons of buckets. You will never have too many buckets. As long as you pay your water bill and have endless amounts of water you can never go wrong with a good collection of buckets to fill up and dump out and then repeat that process 150 million times a day.
- Cutie sunglasses!!! --for obvious reasons.
- Under Armour makes the best t shirts ever for kiddos. They wick water/sweat away and dry super fast. They are really light weight and breathable for those hot sunny days. I will admit on the pricey side for "play clothes" at $18/shirt...but after weekly wearings last summer, I can say they really maintain their shape and color with very little signs of wear. Luckily, we bought big last year and Nugget still fits in it as well as this amazeballs new one (displayed above) we purchased this year. Good investment pieces if you can swing it.
- A good book for Mama!!! If you have an independent player, like I do, outside time is a great opportunity to do a little light reading!


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Click here to view an interactive map of the Northern Ireland dataset as currently collated by CEDaR.
The map is generated through the NBN Gateway using their Interactive Mapping Tool.
This small, common, grey, granular-crustose lichen likes some mild nutrient enrichment (dust) so should be looked for on wall tops, tree bases and the tops of wooden bollards in car parks. It forms small, dark stains packed with blackish discs which have a thick, pale margin. It is a common species in suitable habitats throughout Ireland.
Original text submitted by Simon Davey
|Simms, M. J., (2016). Rinodina gennarii Bagl.. [In] LichenIreland.
http://www.habitas.org.uk/lichenireland/species.asp?item=19005 Accessed on 2018-08-20.


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| Location:Las Vegas NV
Begins: Jan-01-2018
Ends: Dec-31-2018
|Description: See what millions worldwide have been laughing about for 13 years! Four women at a lingerie sale with nothing in common but a black lace bra AND memory loss, hot flashes, night sweats, not enough sex, too much sex and more! This joyful musical parody set to classic tunes from the '60s, '70s and '80s will have you cheering and dancing in the aisles!
| Contact: SARA MILLER
Email: firstname.lastname@example.com
Phone: 954-735-2000
Copyright © 2018- Pc-Mann - All rights reserved.


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The CEO Magazine, is the India`s leading monthly magazine published from New Delhi, India. It is the excellent medium that allows the top level executives to share their experiences, challenges they faced and case studies. That creates the extraordinary benefits to the Startups community and vibrant entrepreneurs to analyze on the IT trends; learning's to organize and gives the better understanding in achieving their business objectives effectively.
We believe in giving the real and inspirational case studies with proper guidance to Mid Size Companies, Startups and Entrepreneurs.
26-100 employees


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Learn about our history, philosophy and staff.
See for yourself what Camp Micah is all about.
From what you will eat for breakfast to where you will sleep at night - and all of the workshops and activities in between! Learn about the details here.
It was great to see so many Camp Micah Alumni at this weeks Blue Scarf Peace Walk in Toronto!
1 -226-339-8218
Camp Micah is hosted at Cedar Ridge Camp in McArther Mills, ON.
Copyright © 2018 Camp Micah. All Rights Reserved. Powered by QuickSilk.


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Every element of a child bed linen should be analyzed completely. The security of the bed linens outweighs expensive layouts and styles. Choosing the appropriate cushion for your child could establish your child's safety and security.
Below are the requirements in picking the child mattress. You ought to have the ability to develop the ideal one.
They claim that size does not matter. For the safety and security of your child, it does issue. The size of the mattress should strongly fit to the baby crib. Nowadays, all mattresses are produced in basic sizes. One could never go incorrect if one checks as several times as feasible. If you could fit greater than one finger between the cushion and the baby crib rail, then it is not secure!
Before getting that cushion, better check exchange and return plan. You could require that details after uncovering that 2 fingers could fit between the baby crib and the cushion.
Soft is far better compared to firm, that is, on the grownup's viewpoint. Remember that your infant has a soft spinal column; as a result, he requires a firm cushion. When picking the ideal cushion for your child bed linen, the alternatives will just be foam or coil cushions.
Foam cushions serve. Be certain that it is solid sufficient. If it occurs to be soft, your child's face will penetrate the mattress when he counts on his side. That soft mattress can potentially stifle your priceless child to fatality.
Coil mattresses are cushions with internal springs. You can state that it is far better compared to foam cushions. You need to think about the number of coils. If it takes place that there are couple of variety of coils, then the very same suffocating situation will occur. Therefore, purchase those with more strings. The higher the variety of strings, the stronger the mattress for your child bed linens is.
Covers are essential for those with coil cushions. Covers of this sort of cushion could get torn revealing the internal spring. These cushions are covered with several layers in situation one layer gets torn off. Investigate sleepjunkie to know more about mattress.
To look for covers, you should check the sides. You should watch out for sharp plastic sides. You may most likely wind up with cuts every single time you transform sheets. You would desire to inspect for unique attributes. Anti-bacterial covers could keep bacteria away. A child bed linen with totally secured cushions could keep dirt and bed insects at bay.


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In the fall of 2016, Tufts University School of Medicine (TUSM) embarked on a historic transformation, made possible by a $15 million gift from the Jaharis Family Foundation. Among other things, this gift will fund a major renovation and expansion of the gross anatomy lab on our health sciences campus in the heart of downtown Boston.
As generations of Tufts-trained doctors know, gross anatomy is where medical education truly begins. It's where we encounter our first patients, learn how to work as a team, hone our observational skills, and develop a spirit of inquiry that we will use throughout our careers.
We are honored by the generosity and vision of the Jaharis Family and thrilled that their gift has created an opportunity for all of us to become partners in this project through the Clinical Skills and Medical Education Technology Fund.
The name is long, but the aim is simple, and powerful: Your gifts to the Clinical Skills and Medical Education Technology Fund will equip the new anatomy lab, along with our Clinical Skills and Simulation Center, with state-of-the-art tools, resources, and faculty support – everything we need to turn these beautifully renovated spaces into a medical training environment of the highest caliber.
I hope you will read more in these pages about this exciting effort and how you can be part of it. Together we can shape a wonderful future for the medical school and a better world through the practice of medicine.
With gratitude,
Harris Berman, Dean
To learn more or discuss specific giving opportunities, contact Rebecca Scott, Senior Director of Development and Alumni Relations, at 617-636-2777 or email@example.com.
Endowed professorships enable Tufts to attract and retain talented physicians and medical researchers.
View list of Endowed Professorships »
Learn more about giving to an existing or creating a new endowed fund »
"I see the Morton A. Madoff Professorship as both a great honor and a responsibility. Mort's vision, which I had the pleasure of experiencing firsthand, was to promote the integration and dialogue between public health and health care, and thereby advance population health for all persons. The Madoff Professorship allows me to carry those ideals forward as a Tufts leader in public health research and education."
Aviva Must, PhD, N87, NG92, J01P, A03P
Morton A. Madoff Professor and Chair of Public Health & Community Medicine
Dean, Public Health & Professional Degree Programs
"Establishing a professorship at Tufts University School of Medicine was our way of boosting the school's reputation and development. I know Tufts competes with better funded institutions for the best faculty and students, so I'm proud to have been part of bringing Phil Haydon, PhD, the chair of the Department of Neuroscience, to the faculty. He's a star who has attracted other great professors to the department."
Annetta Grisard-Schrafl, J94P, trustee emerita
The Annetta and Gustav Grisard Professorship in Neuroscience
Tufts University is consistently ranked at the highest level for sound fiscal management by Charity Navigator.
Learn more about Tufts University's charity rating »
Tufts University School of Medicine and the Sackler School of Graduate Biomedical Sciences at Tufts University are international leaders in innovative medical education and advanced research. The School of Medicine and the Sackler School are renowned for excellence in education in general medicine, biomedical sciences, special combined degree programs in business, health management, public health, bioengineering and international relations, as well as basic and clinical research at the cellular and molecular level.
Ranked among the top in the nation, the School of Medicine is affiliated with Tufts Medical Center, Maine Medical Center, Baystate Medical Center, Newton-Wellesley Hospital, Lahey Hospital and Medical Center, St. Elizabeth's Medical Center, and many other elite teaching hospitals and health care facilities. Tufts University School of Medicine and the Sackler School undertake research that is consistently rated among the highest in the nation for its effect on the advancement of medical science.
Non-Discrimination Statement
© Copyright 2016 Tufts University


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Last night's match attracted large number of eyeballs. India clinched another win in the Asia Cup 2016. It's time now for the hosts Bangladesh to take on the defending T20 champions Sri Lanka at Mirpur. It is almost a do or die match for the hosts who have won one match and lost one match. Sri Lanka have started their account with a narrow win over UAE and they would love to extend their winning lead in the Asia Cup. Watch the action live on HotStar app and score app and Star Sports TV network.
We are used to see merciless pitches for the bowlers. But this Asia Cup has presented a pitch that has provided more assistance to the bowlers. It was evident in all the matches so far. Infact the last match between India and Pakistan culminated in less than 100 runs each innings.
Bangladesh have been extremely strong at home in the recent past. But they couldn't show the same calibre in the Asia Cup so far. They were not upto the mark against India. A win over UAE should ideally not give them too much of confidence as they are now lined up against Sri Lanka and Pakistan. Only wins would help them reach the finals.
Sri Lanka's batting also looked below par against UAE. Fortunately Malinga bowled an exceptional spell that clinched a win for Sri Lanka. Sri Lanka need to raise the bar if they have to win the Asia cup. Batting well on this pitch would demand a lot of patience from the batsmen.
A lot of eyes would be on Mustafizur Rahman who is 20 year old tough lad. The left arm bowler holds the key for the Bangladeshi team. He can do something that Nehra or Amir did for India or Pakistan respectively.
Bowlers have enjoyed their run so far in the mega tournament of Asia. Alike Virat Kohli, crowd would expect others to stand up and show some courage to stay on the pitch and score runs. Otherwise this can turn out to be another low scoring game. Watch the match live on Hotstar and Star Sports.


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Friday, April 22, 2011
The Joke Was On Me (Part Six)
[The moniker "the Bandaid" isn't meant to be in any way derogatory toward the guy I've applied it to. Rather, anything derogatory about it would be aimed at the parents who used him, unwittingly, as an emotional bandaid to manipulate their daughter.]
The three of us got together up on the deck and found a side table. Then...all weirdness. The patriarse went into a spiel about appearances, about how we need to be aware that we represent Christ, about what people might think if they see certain things (as if I've ever cared what people think), and about how the bible says we're to treat women "as sisters". Oh dear Lord. I wanted to raise my hand and say "What if I want to marry my sister? One of my sisters is awfully pretty. I came on this very cruise just to spend time with this sister. What's the bible say about that?" I didn't say anything. I just kinda chuckled wondering what the Bandaid might be thinking of all of this. I mean, the guy was taking a verse that was speaking to how we treat one another in a fellowship or assembly/as part of the church body - not at all about how men are to act toward women in every situation, particularly a romantic situation - and using it to try to control me? Using it to try to guilt me? No thanks. Not interested. She and I had already determined that WE would set our own boundaries concerning our physical interaction. Of course, not being the daughter of a patriarse, my half of "WE" had significantly more teeth than hers, but she'd told me that she didn't need to be sheltered concerning us, we were both adults, and she was comfortable setting her own boundaries.
The patriarse then informed us that he had set a 12:00AM curfew on the girls (who, btw, were all adults) and that he expected us to "honor" it and to help the girls "honor" it. {Church Lady alert} Controlling jackhole. I was prepared for some of this kind of crap, so it wasn't exactly coming out of left field. I knew he had ample amounts of religious weirdness and strange/aberrant ideas about his role as a father. I expected to see it, whether in bits and pieces or full speed ahead, on this trip. The Bandaid, though...poor guy. He didn't say a word as we headed back to the cabin.
The whole idea of patriarchals and emotion makes me think of cavemen discovering fire for the first time. "Fire bad!" The difference is...at least neanderthals wouldn't have to burn everybody to prove "Fire bad!" and make fire a means of control. But, the confusion levels are nearly identical. I've come to see that perhaps the only part of a women's being, prior to marriage, that has any real value or merit in this paradigm is her hymen. Her mind is irrelevant, and her heart is most certainly irrelevant - despite empty patriarchal lip service about "guarding it" (usually just prior to beating the hell out of it). What's really being guarded is her hymen. I'm convinced of this. Then, after matrimony, the only meaningful parts of her being are her uterus and ovaries. Of this I'm also equally convinced.
Once we got back to the cabin, the Bandaid was still quiet for a few minutes, and then, he just blurted out, "What do you think of all of that? I mean, isn't that, like, overkill?" I could tell this had caused him some consternation. Again, I pitied him. He was/is a good guy. Nice guy (early 20s), Christian guy, from a good, healthy family. All I said in response was "He's her dad. I only listen for that reason for her sake, whether I agree with him or not. I'm just trying to make it through the week." That was the truth. I was just trying to avoid making waves until I could get a better handle on a few things. To take his mind off of it, I showed him the ring I had bought. He wanted to know if I was definitely proposing that week. At that point in time, I could only answer in maybes. I was hoping to propose to her on Valentine's Day (which was Thursday...we boarded on Monday - and, I'm well aware that Valentine's proposals are corny to a lot of people - so be it), but, there were a couple of things that would have to happen for the proposal to happen. The first was already being realized - I had needed to see her bonding to me more than to her family/father, i.e., turning to me first in a given situation, particularly problem (even if small problem) situations. I was seeing that in her over the previous week in spades. Then, I had to hear her tell me she loved me. Not just infer it. Not just imply or insinuate it. I wanted to hear it. Unprovoked. From her own lips.
The next several days were beautiful. Gorgeous weather, smooth seas, and the two of us spending as much time as possible together. I was falling more deeply in love with her by the second. There was so much women there, so much heart there, that had never been tapped into. She had no idea the woman she was capable of being - thanks to the patriarchal jar she'd been planted in. And, frankly, if you could separate her from her "religion" she was just an amazing, soft-hearted person. So beautiful, inside and out. Truth be told, apart from her father, who just has "ass" in his DNA, her entire family is beautiful - but only when you can separate them from their "religion". Add their beliefs into the mix and they were and are a human tragedy.
We would meet every morning at about 8:00, and go up on deck and enjoy breakfast together. If we were in port, we'd actually go out on the outside deck and enjoy our breakfast in Bahamian breezes and overlooking beautiful turquoise waters. Then, her family devotionals/indoctrination sessions in her parent's cabin at 10:00, which, surprisingly, by Tuesday, they were asking me to lead. I'd try to incite discussion on the passages I'd read from the bible, or on certain topics - to no avail. I came to see that the girls were all afraid to discuss these things, in the presence of an "outsider", in front of their father. No one actually admitted to this. It was quite obvious anyway. By Tuesday, as we began to stop in various ports, we'd exit the ship and explore a bit, finding a nice little spot to purchase a smoothie or something else to satisfy the sweet tooth, then we'd walk around through the various shops and look at all the tourist-driven overpriced merchandise. Then, in early afternoon, upon re-embarking, we'd spend some time alone together somewhere before meeting up with her family for dinner seating at 5:30. After this, usually sometime around 8-9:00, her family would have to do a half-hour set, and afterward, she and I would retreat to the outer deck at the back of the ship to a little private nook we'd found. We'd talk about all manner of things there, all while watching the moonlight dancing across the waves in the ship's wake. Beautiful...oh, and the waves and moon and stuff weren't bad either. We began to refer to this little nook as "our spot". On Wednesday afternoon, I booked her into the spa to get pampered a bit, which, needless to say, she enjoyed, and it gave me the opportunity to take care of some business.
I was aiming at Valentine's day to propose for several reasons. One primary reason was - Valentine's Day was her family's "Christmas". They believed the celebration of Christmas was too pagan and too "commercial", so they gave "the man" the Bronx Cheer by exchanging gifts on Valentine's Day (Yes, it's STOOPID, and a completely superficial and meaningless reaction and protest - but it was pointless to argue it). I was confident that I was going to hear "I love you" prior to Valentine's Day...even though things were cutting it close. Confident enough that on Wednesday I called her parent's cabin and asked if I could come speak with them for a moment. Now, please keep in mind, I don't believe that ANYTHING mandated a need for me to speak with her parents about proposing, and I had made it absolutely clear to her that, when and if the time came, I'd only be going to them to seek a ceremonial/tradition-based blessing, and I wouldn't be seeking permission under ANY circumstances. I needed her to be clear on that in case someone (the patriarse) tried to flip things around on me/us at some point. There was no gray area between the two of us on that issue.
She and I had planned to get up extra early on Valentine's to go up on deck and watch the sunrise. If all fell into place, I figured THAT would be a special way and place to propose. I was entirely uncertain of how receptive her parents would be to any of this. Her mom, to my surprise, seemed genuinely excited for her daughter when I sat them down and told them, "I love your daughter very much, I'd like to marry her, and I'd like to ask for your blessing on my proposal." Totally ceremonial from my perspective, as I've said. They had been expecting this. Her dad was overwhelmingly cooperative - at least superficially. He asked me when I planned to propose, and I told him about the sunrise plans the next morning (hopefully). He asked me if I'd be willing to wait until that night, after her family had exchanged their gifts. I didn't really understand the significance of waiting, so he explained, "She has something special planned for tomorrow morning...I'd like for you to let her go through with it." Looking back on all of this, this is the ONE time he actually acted like a loving, caring father, looking out for her best interests and not his own. I agreed to wait until the next night to propose - or longer if necessary to hear "I love you".
The "something special" she'd planned for the next morning was telling me she loved me. This was a HUGE deal for her, considering the screwed up concepts of emotion she'd been taught, and the "you love the man you marry...you don't marry the man you love" bassackward mindset of most fundamentalists/patriocentrics, which, btw, was also largely what she was taught. The women in her life were more "dutiful" toward their husbands than affectionate. It was their "duty" and "service" to love their husbands. In fact, the marriage relationship that she had valued the MOST as a benchmark was that of her paternal grandpa/grandma, and she'd described it as completely inaffectionate. The way she'd always viewed love and emotion wasn't something that inspired the warm fuzzies in me, so her being so open about being in love with me was an enormous hurdle that had been cleared.
The night before, we had discussed Valentine's Day gifts for each other. We'd agreed weeks prior to not do anything outrageous or costly, but something simple. Now knowing that I had to come at a proposal from a different direction, and still wanting it to be special, I suggested that we write letters to each other. Very open and intimate letters, describing our thoughts and feelings about the other. I'd somehow incorporate my proposal into what I would write.
Anticipation chewed me up that day, particularly after the "I love you" early that morning. We went through the somewhat regular routine for most of the morning, although my mind was entirely on that night. On that day, the ship was anchored at Half Moon Cay, a mile or so long, couple hundred yards wide, strip of white sand wrapped in the most beautiful tropical blue waters I've seen anywhere. The ship has to anchor about a 1/2 mile offshore, and to go to the island, you have to board a shuttle and boat over. There are things there like para-sailing, horseback riding, a big BBQ on the beach, and several little touristy shops. I suggested that she go over to the island with her family while I stayed on the ship to tend to a few things. While I did need to do some laundry and such, my suggestion was self-serving - it would give me some time to write what I needed to write. I'd go and start a load of laundry, then run back to my cabin and write, then run back and put them in the dryer while starting a new load, then run back and write. After about 90 minutes of this routine, and as I was nearly finished with the laundry (still had a little more to write), the phone in my cabin rang. She was on the other end. I asked, "You're already back?" (normally, you're over on the island for at least 3-4 hours) She said, "I didn't go." I asked why, and she told me, "I didn't want to be away from you for that long. Where are you now? Are you finished with your laundry? Can you come up and see me?" Oh man, I may be a grizzled and weathered dude, but that just tore me up. I went up on the deck to meet her, and she was sooo pretty, just sitting there in a deck chair. I sat with her for a few minutes, and we didn't really say much - not with our mouths, anyway. Then, I had to break away to finish my writing before hooking back up for an hour or so prior to dinner.
A week or so before meeting up with her family, knowing that she, as with most homeschoolers, had been an avid journaler, I had bought a nice little suede-backed journal to give to her at some point. It came in handy in this instance. I wrote an entry for each day of the cruise, telling her how deeply I was falling in love with her, how amazing I found her heart, and so forth. The last entry, the one for this particularly day, had a special ending. Before entering the dining room, I gave the journal to a gentleman who sat at our table all week and dined with us and said, "When I ask for this, will you pass it over?" He looked befuddled for a moment, then said, "Sure!" with a bit of a wry grin on his face (I mean, people had noticed the way the two of us looked at each other). Her family immediately commenced in exchanging their gifts upon being seated, primarily little knick-knacks and sentimental items. The whole time I'm thinking, "Would you guys do me a solid and put the pedal to the metal?! I've got business to attend to here, people!" And then, finally...
When "our" turn came, I asked her if she'd like to go first, and she said "I'd like for you to." She was apprehensive, mistakenly thinking I may not like what she'd written to me. With that, I nodded to the man holding the journal for me and asked, "Would you please pass it over to her?" When it reached her, I asked, "Please read what I've written." She asked, "Now?" I said, "Please do." So, she began to silently read, as all at the table sat in silent and bemused curiosity. I took her a couple of minutes (I can be long-winded, you know - and I remember details). I was just anxious for her to reach the last entry, which ended with...
"I had a very interesting conversation with your parents yesterday. Please say yes... "
Her mouth fell open, and all she could do was stare at me in total wonder, mouth agape, as I rose from the table, then dropped to a knee, presented the ring, and asked her to marry me. Her hand went over her mouth, she dropped the journal, and then embraced me in a deathgrip that would do a Greco-Roman wrestler proud, and exclaimed "Yes!" in my ear. She wouldn't let go - which was fine with me - squeezing me continually tighter for what seemed like ages, before finally allowing me to place the ring on her finger. She, her sisters, and her mother were in tears, the entire dining room had noticed what was going on by this time, and for the moment, we were the toast of the ship. It was, to that point, the most beautiful moment of my life.
Fortunately, the Bandaid captured it all on video for us, beginning with her jaw dropping. It was a genuinely priceless moment. A moment everyone deserves to experience at least once in their lives. Even though everything eventually went to hell in a handbasket, I was, and still am, thankful to God for allowing that moment to be special, and especially so for her. I wanted, so much, for my proposal to be special for her.
A couple of hours later, after her family had finished their performance, she and I retreated to "our spot", and she asked if we could pray together. I prayed, making a promise to both her and God that "from this day forward, I would and will give up everything in my life, short of my faith in You, for her." She repeated the same type of prayer, with the exact same promise. As far as we were concerned, we were married. Everything that followed would just be ceremony. I then just held her in my arms for a while. No one needed to say a word.
24 comments:
It's so sad knowing that everything went south...ReplyDelete
And btw, I think your point about the verse about treating women as sisters is a very good one.
- AnonymousApril 22, 2011 at 10:16 PM
Part 7 part 7!!!!!ReplyDelete
- Mr. Green EyesApril 22, 2011 at 10:32 PM
"I've come to see that perhaps the only part of a women's being, prior to marriage, that has any real value or merit in this paradigm is her hymen. Her mind is irrelevant, and her heart is most certainly irrelevant - despite empty patriarchal lip service about "guarding it" (usually just prior to beating the hell out of it). What's really being guarded is her hymen. I'm convinced of this. Then, after matrimony, the only meaningful parts of her being are her uterus and ovaries. Of this I'm also equally convinced."ReplyDelete
For all the hoopla from the P/QF paradigm about honoring and protecting women, the only evidence I've seen so far is that they think the only valuable part of a woman before she's married is her virginity, and her ability to pop out lots of little soldiers for Christ after she's married. Other than that, a woman is good for nothing in their eyes.
I won't have anything to do with that line of thinking. I can only suspect that the PQ/F followers have never actually been in love with a wonderful woman for them to think that way.
The woman with whom I am in love is so far beyond me in every single way -- she's brilliant, kind, generous, talented, beautiful, and so completely unique that I really couldn't care whether or not she had maintained her virginity before I met her (somehow, despite meeting me and both of us being madly in love, we're both still as pure as the wind-driven snow in that department. So much for being 'unequally yoked'.)
Wow. I am close to tears. You loved her so much. She loved you.ReplyDelete
Oh my gosh.
People sacrifice their children on the altar of these twisted teachings.
Is he a sociopath? Because it seems like only sociopaths are capable of carrying these heartless doctrines to their true end. Parents who do love their children end up letting go of how they've been taught to parent, realizing that something that will break their child is not good, no matter how it's marketed ("God's way! The only way! No matter how much it hurts and how painful it is, it's what must be done because... uh, ahem.. It just must be done.")
Were her parents toying with you in agreeing and being happy and all at that point? Or, I can just wait and see.
Thank you for sharing, Lewis.
I hope people see your story and start to understand the dysfunctionality and ugliness of it all.
It's just....beautiful.ReplyDelete
oh, my heart breaks.ReplyDelete
[i'm here from the blog "Permission to Live", btw]
your point about "protecting her hymen" and etc - it's the stupidest, most idiotic idea in HISTORY.
to be a bit TMI, i was born with NO hymen.
i'm not alone.
further, it's TISSUE. it errodes. the idea that a woman older than 20 WILL have a hymen is... i don't even have a word. just LIFE will cause it to atrophy, but there a thousand ways to "lose" a hyman without anything resembling sex: riding, sports, heavy labor...
and a girl raised in a QF/P home? is GOING to be doing heavy labor.
[also: pregnancy will kill me. i'm COMPLETELY worthless to the entire QF/P sect - and yet. i continued to go to school during the time i was having multiple surgeries on my hip, and i STILL mostly got As. but my brain doesn't matter, any work i would do with it doesn't matter - i can't have babies therefor i should just drop dead or something. sigh]
i ran into this the first time as a teenager - my first actual experience with Christianity, actually. it... didn't go over, so well. there are lots of things behind that, that you don't need or want to know - but that whole "your virginity is the ONLY important thing about you" combined with "if a man rapes you, YOU sinned by "inciting him to lust" and should be punished" made it worse.
because it's all insane. i've READ the Bible - i wonder if QF/P REALLY have? i mean, they read SOME of it, but have they REALLY read what Jesus said? Qf/P often do NOT act in a Christ-like manner. and they terrify me.
seriously - my heart, it is breaking for you :(
Denelian, what group is it that taught you stuff like "if a man rapes you, YOU sinned by "inciting him to lust" and should be punished" ?ReplyDelete
Because anyone who tells that to a raped girl, would have been better off if he drowns with a millstone round his neck... Its a scandal when people who believe that are allowed to raise ANY children...
"Its a righteous disgrace/ its a sin and a shame/ all of this garbage in Jesus name/ I know we have to wait for you to burn up the chaff/but what can we do for the sheep/ when the wolves are on full time staff?"- From the Don Francisco song " Righteous disgrace
- AnonymousApril 23, 2011 at 9:47 AM
Yaa it is a heartbreaking story. I could not help but think the whole QF/P thing is dead wrong against Christ because of what you wrote about the whole thinking of you love the man you marry...you don't marry the man you love". What if Christ died out of duty then God loved us?, but according to Christ God was already in love with us before he(Christ) died. How unlike Christ the whole QF/P really is. Thank you for sharing your story Lewis and Happy EasterReplyDelete
Retha...The Independent Fundamentalist Baptists have been known to play things out that way, and other fundamentalist groups are probably not all that far behind them.ReplyDelete
The P/QF crowd, for instance, shifts responsibility to women for the sexual lusts and sins of men by placing the burden on them to not be "defrauding".
Lewis...so glad you are alive and well!!! was a little afraid when didn't see any posting...this breaks my heart knowing there was such a promise of beauty....ReplyDelete
My heart is breaking for you, my friend....:'(ReplyDelete
The love you had for her is so beautiful. That proposal was so romantic. My heart breaks for you because I know there was no happy ending to this.ReplyDelete
My dad was always spouting the whole, "you love the one you marry, you don't marry the one you love," crap at my sister and I. And what, exactly, is so wrong in marrying the one you love? ugh.
Oh, Lewis, my heart breaks, seeing the beautiful thing that was destroyed.ReplyDelete
All this seeing of marriage as a financial transaction with the woman as the commodity being purchased, and breeding rights being the purpose, is sick and disgusting. I love the sweetness of your still being glad you blessed her with the real thing.
(BTW, I know you mean it as a joke-- but lots of "church ladies" are awesome people who would be with you in this, heart and soul, and wouldn't care one iota about "language" or whatever it is you think they'd mind. I'm sort of a "church lady" myself, I guess. . . )
it was a fundamentalist church - not sure, anymore, what specific type - just that all the women HAD to wear dresses that were at least 2 inches past their knees, HAD to wear their hair "up" [because "hair is a measure of a woman's beauty and you don't flaunt it" IIRC] and could NOT wear makeup, most jewlery, pants, or short-sleeved tops.
in Northern California in the summer [where it's often 120F. or more]
it was... my mom converted to Christianity when i was 9, after first my sister, then i, almost died [it was a 2-year period of horror, really]. she kept going to progressivly more and more conservative churches, looking for a place that would give her the EXACT way to "keep us safe".
except - problem A, none of us were Christian. we knew the basics, yeah - but not a LOT about it. and, for many years, she didn't make us go [or seem to want us to] and she didn't say *anything* about us converting.
and then, when i was 14, she took me.
the first months started very innocently - every week, a question ["is that really a good shirt to wear in church? don't you worry that men will look at the shirt and think you are saying you're willing to "sell" your body"? don't you feel uncomfortable with looks like that? why would you want to "pretend to be a boy" by wearing boys garments"] - every week, it was something new, some further thing i did that was "dressing wrong".
after a couple of months of this - where i did make an effort to dress, at least for church, in the way they seemed to want [and i never, ever succeeded - if nothing else, my breasts were too big and NOTHING "hid" them] it went from "dress this way for YOUR benefit" to "dress this way so you don't cause some man to sin"
right about the time the message was changing, i approached the pastor i knew and liked best, and the horrible things happening at home. [this was the last time i ever tried to get help].
his WHOLE take on it was "well, look at you - what man WOULDN'T rape, if he could? look at what you're wearing [that day, i was dressed almost exactly the same as his wife. only difference was she was wearing 1" heels and i wasn't]. now, think about what YOU have done to MAKE him do this? what have YOU done that YOU can stop? come, pray with me, and ask the Lord's forgiveness for your "adultry" and for "temptation" and "fornication"" and some other words i didn't even understand - defrauding was one of them.
i thereafter refused to go back to the church - the pastor ended the pray by gropping me, and then telling me i was "already damaged goods" so it would be in MY best interest to let him to what he wanted, so that he'd "keep my secret shame secret" for me.
my mom and i fought about it, but even at 14, i KNEW that all of that was BS. but the entire church seemed to believe it - after that sunday and "prayer", friends that i went to school with in the church shunned me - they whispered about how i was a "husband-stealing whore" all around school, and treated me VERY badly. i have no clue, at all, what that pastor said about me. nor did i care, at that point - i just wanted to NEVER be near him again.
*shrug* that's the how and the what. i don't KNOW the why. the where doesn't matter. the who matters, but... yeah.
i have seen GOOD churches, since. i don't believe all - or most! - Christian churches are like that - only the fundamentalist ones.
Denalian, that's so disgusting. I wish I could slap that pastor!ReplyDelete
Kristen - you aren't alone! he was eventually tried for several crimes - among others, statutory rape, sex with a minor, gross sexual misconduct, and corruption of minors.ReplyDelete
he's in jail. still. but it took several more years and him actually raping two different girls [younger than i was - one was the "statutory", the other the "sex with a minor", the difference being the exact age], not to mention several other... things.
and he sat in court, on the witness stand, and told the court - over and over again! - how it wasn't his fault, that those children were "temptresses" who "defrauded" him and "made him lose control". i thought he was going for an insanity plea, myself - but it turns out, he REALLY BELIEVED that the jury would "see" that it was all the fault of the girls.
*shudder* i feel so BAD for them - for all the kids in that situation. i wasn't Christian, i was going to church to apease my mother, not because i wanted to. i had NOTHING invested in that church [and only went to the pastor because i was afraid my step-father was going to start branching out to my younger sisters]. the other girls? WERE invested, and were trapped between "sins", either way they turned they were somehow the one at fault.
the term "defraud" really sounds, to me, like "permission to rape you". i can't see any other REAL reason for such a thing. i have been forever scared away from fundamentalism [not that i think that's bad]. my problem is knowing people who ARE fundamentalist, and NOT fighting with them constantly. it's a great GOOD twisted into a perverse evil, and i want to save everyone from it. but you can't save people who don't want to be save - who don't even know they SHOULD be saved. which just makes it all worse. sigh.
1. funny: the "Love the one you marry" got the song "Love the one you're with" going in my brain!ReplyDelete
2. I, too, hate that this didn't work out. What a sweet story.
3. The whole QF/P approach to women is straight out of the "Other" kingdom--Saudi Arabia.
Lewis, I am grateful this moment was special. You captured it beautifully. Inside I was cheering for you both. So so sweet.ReplyDelete
- A Nony MouseMay 20, 2011 at 10:27 AM
Lewis, you're teaching me a lot. Everyone else here, I really enjoy the comments. I was part of a Reformed church recently, that's Southern Baptist. I saw many of these attitudes and beliefs within the congregation. It was very weird for me, even, as I am black and the congregation was predominately white. Not that black churches don't have their issues, because they do. But I wanted to know the Gospel and plainly so, without all of the hoopla and propserity teachings, etc...ReplyDelete
So I found this church after visiting some SGM (Sovereign Grace) churches (which THAT is ANOTHER story on abuse and sexual misconduct and fundamentalist crap). Many things they taught were good, but yeah, there was much of this stuff on male and female roles, the Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood and its views on how men and women should relate.
In retrospect, I can see why much of these teachings, espeically courtship and dating and marriage, all seemed strange and new to me. But like a sheeple, I submitted myself to it all. I didn't have to worry anyways, because one thing I realized about fundamentalist Reformed white conservative Christians, is that most of them won't marry outside of their lilly white race anyways.
You can see what devastation and hurt that can cause in a black Christian who sees all believers the same. I thought them to be hypocrites and blind to their own sin; espeically their racism, bigotry and preference for their own culture that they soooo often read into their understanding of Chrsitian community. Lewis, you said it right in one comment you wrote in another post about this whole movement has a desire to preserve their own nationalism, their own conservative white culture... It's NOT about preserving the true Gospel. Most of them are so blind they can't even see this. I had a discussion with a few people at my old church about why I left. And I said you don't realize that the preaching is geared towards the struggles and issues with your culture; that the way of life preached has your culture in mind. But the Gospel should be taught through the lens of many cultures who endure many types of hardships, etc... which is why it should be important to have a staff from different backgrounds, etc... we live in a metropolitan city, so this is VERY possible to achieve. But rather, they didn't see this was important for the Gospel and that it had nothing to do with the Gospel. I'm like damn, you read Acts or Ephesians lately??? Which is weird considering how much they pick their hearts daily to find each and every sin after hearing preaching on sin almost every freaking Sunday.
Yeah, thank God he saved me from that. As single person and 30, it gets hard. But I never thought as a Christian I would ever thank God for any suffering he has allowed in my life, but let me honestly say to you that I am glad that the Lord allowed my suffering through singleness to continue in that congregation and not marry one of these weirdos. In that, he was rescuing me and delivering me from these authoritarian/paternalistic views that would have wreaked havoc in my heart and in my life--espeically any marriage that would have resulted within that congregation. cont'd
- A Nony MouseMay 20, 2011 at 10:29 AM
I know friends now that are having a really hard time in their marriages. Most people marry quickly, barely know one another, don't kiss or hold hands before dating, don't spend enough alone time together and all this other hogwash. NOthing is wrong with NOT doing those things in and of themselves, but it's the promises they want to make...that your marriage will be secure if you wait. That its your responsibility to guard a persons heart and to not defraud them. These things are true to an extent.ReplyDelete
But what I can see is a congregation of seriously abnormal men who I'm sure, in the dark, have real sexual issues. Espeically since the men and women stay separate. The only time men and women even bother to know one another is if a guy has thought about a woman, say three years! (LOL) and decides to approach her. It's all too weird and I can't believe that such knowlegeable people practice and believe these stupid things.
I couldnt' grasp the teaching that people didn't necessarily have to have chemistry or be in love before they married. This love out of obligation and duty seemed so... well, loveless??? I am confused. But yet, it's sites like this and many other books I have been reading by Gordon Fee, Christians for Biblical Equality and so forth that have helped me tremendous. Also, Spiritual Abuse and Churches that Abuse are great books!
I am going to see a counselor soon to help me work through some of the issues. I am saddened by my newfound distrust and dislike of white people simply because of my experience at this church. I have never been made to feel so unattractive, undesirable, outcast and just ridiculously sinful all the damn time.
Luckily, this situation pushed me closer to God and no away from him. But yes, I have been mad at him for it. For two wasted years where I could have been somewhere else. BUt you know what, I ignored the urgings of the Holy Spirit at times, but it's hard to fight A-type know-it-all conservatives who think they know EVERYTHING about a self proclaimed mysterious God. \
Sad to say, many of my friends who are African-American are also leaving that church. Yes, all ten of us, LOL. I'm from the South and this church is in the Nation's Capital. I've always had white friends growing up who were so cool and never treated me this way. I wondered if it was just a cultural thing, particularly of the conservative branch of Christianity. My ex-pastor is a fundamentalist and completely obsessed with puritans, church history and church discipline. That shouldn't be hard to figure out.
- A Nony MouseMay 20, 2011 at 10:35 AM
And about virginity and childbearing and serving men... I am glad to know that whether I was a virgin or not (and I am) and whether I wait or not (which I plan to continue to do so), and whether I let my husband "lead" me or not (which I will mutually submit and work alongside him), and whether he believes in Election or not (which I don't), and whether we hold hands and kiss (which we probably will--WHERE IS THIS GUY ALREADY??? lol) I don't any or all of those things is what will give us a great marriage.
These "Christians" are fearful. They fear sin to a degree that they think they can reach a point where they are sinless or control their thoughts in inhuman ways. They truly don't trust God, because if they did, they wouldn't have so many forumlas that are supposedly going to give us problem free lives. Mature and realistic Christians know that just becuase you do everything right, doesn't mean that God owes you anything. Mature Christians know that the Bible says that the way two people fall in love and become one is a mystery (which is why I kissed "I kissed dating goodbye" GOOD-FREAKING-BYE!). Mature Christians know that Christ loved people and lived amongst the lowliest of sinners--and loved them and met them where they were, were honest wtih them and always didn't have some underhanded sneaky dishonest alterior motive. Mature Christians marry knowing that it will not be perfect, that two people cannot seek to control one another, and that God has not promised them paradise or perfection. Mature Christians marry knowing that even if they do everything "right" by a fundamenalist standard, (which a mature Christian would never try to do), that sin is powerful and real in this world and still one partner may want out eventually.
Ultimately, the Mature Christian trusts God completely and without reserve, like the simple trust of a child. He will find that it will be well with him to leave behind his formulas and his works-centered heady knowledge about God, and to learn to let the Lord truly transform his heart into one of love and compassion for others. That's the Christian I hope to become--leaving all this learned legalism, and cold unfeeling religion behind.
- A Nony MouseMay 20, 2011 at 10:36 AM
Anyways, because my church acted and behaved like a fundamentalist cult, I no longer have many friends at all where I live. I am away from home to work in the region I live in. Needless to say, it was great for a time belieivng I had a bunch of friends and people who loved me. It's funny how when you leave or disagree, people start telling you they want to focus on relationships they have at the church. BUt don't worry, you'll make friends where you go. I've even had an elder and his wife tell me that they wanted to focus on the people at their church this season in life, so they couldn't have me over for dinner any more since I was no longer attending the same church as them. I wrote them back a trite response and let them know that I didn't think they knew Christ at all, and their compartmentalization of Christian life was just sad--especially because the Gospels refer to the Church, and not to the church in your specific community. All this "life of the local church" crap bugs me to no end. And yes, I am at times bitter and angry --which they are often worried about my bitterness or anger, but NOT about the real issues that are going on wihtin this partiuclar body of believers. It shows just how ridiculously blind and naive they are, but arrogant and prideful. I can see how this type of environment breeds sociopathic behavior--and unfeeling ability to really understand and empathize with others. Seeing one's self as always right and never the problem. People goin to pastors and elders tellin each other's business and sins in the supposed name of accountability and thwarting sin. It's really a bad situation and many of the people are simply depressed and lifeless. I am glad the Lord has delivered me.ReplyDelete
Lewis, I know you hate it when people say God did you a favor. I hate that too. Because he didn't do you a mere favor. God doesn't do favors. He redeems! He saves! He rescues! He's a deliverer! A strongtower! A fortress! He will no suffer that we would be moved by the enemy.
We do make decisions where we can't see in the future how they will wreck and destroy our hearts. And I'm sure this situation has nearly destroyed you. I, too, have a torn heart full of hurts and disappointments. But I continue to draw near to the Lord.
It is my belief that at the end of hte day, all we truly have is Him. And if we don't buckle down and seek the Lord and know him for truly who he is, anybody can fool us and tell us things about God and what God thinks about us that's not truly Him.
- A Nony MouseMay 20, 2011 at 10:37 AM
I smiled walking away from this situation (many tears too) because I know that in so doing, that God loved me--because he spoke so loud that I could no longer ignore Him and told me to run as fast as I could.ReplyDelete
Others think I needed to leave "well" and make all these ammends with my leadership and try ot help make changes. I told them it was not my responsibility to affect an entire congregation on their prejudices and false doctrines. I also did go to pastors and elders about these issues, and other men and women. So I've done my part. After reading many of the Sovereign Grace Survivor blogs, I see this is common belief about people leaving a church, that they need to leave "well". As in, you can't leave if you have an issue with people. It's their understanding of Matthew 18, which for me and the context it was written, is completely out of context and I don't see this command in Scripture that a person must leave a church "well". They are stupid.
It's sad that you fight through your daily life with it's challenges etc... and church should be the one place you can find refuge from the world--rather, it becomes the place where you battle the most and are always at war with something. We truly wrestle not against flesh and blood. Satan is alive and well and yes, with all of the discourse on preserving the Gospel and the local church, and church discipline, it's sad to see that these pastors are blind to their own disillusions and misinterpretations of Scripture.
God is all we have and we should trust only Him. I know the Lord esteems me and loves me well. I nkow only a loving Father would allow me to suffer the heartaches I did and refuse to give me what I wanted which would have destroyed me. I am so thankful to Him for that. It's freeing to know and feel truly wihtin your heart, (after much warring) that the Lord is on your side and that he affirms and cares for you. Not once since leaving have I felt his back to me. BUt I know it's a road I will likely walk alone, just me and God. Thankfully, I have a few friends who are leaving that church as well and we are able to have healthy and good discussions. They are learning as I share with them very helpful sites like this, and great books that take a different look at Scripture and understanding these issues that seem to destroy our faith.
Anyways, I will be around. And please know that I don't hate white people, y'all. I see that most of you here are and my heart goes out to you. And if a white man asked me tomorrow for a date, I'd surely go, ESPEICALLY if he was fine... oh, and a Christian LOL!
Anyways, this is just a hairline crack of my story. Maybe I'll tell it one day. And title it "On Being Black and No longer Reformed."
Truly your sister in Christ,


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Eastern Cape DestinationsCannon Rocks, Sunshine Coast
Cannon Rocks is a little seaside village just south west of Kenton-on-Sea. To reach it you've got to make a detour off the N2, along Route 72, and then a road in amongst farmland.
Which brings one to its origins. Cannon Rocks is built on a little strip of land between the sea and the Woody Cape forest, given to the town by a farmer by the name of Potgieter - today it's in an area known as the 'golden mile' for its dairy farming, although the 'golden' no longer applies since recent drought and milk prices has seen dairy farmers packing it all in.
A road named after Potgieter runs the length of town along its northern perimeter, whilst his wife, Alice, also got a road named after her, in amongst all the other roads after women - Doreen, Patricia, Ann.
It's not a big town. There are no shops or petrol station. For those you go to Boknesstrand, not far from Cannon Rocks. Boknes beach, Boesmansrivier Mouth and Cannon Rocks all seem to run seamlessly into one another before you reach Kenton-on-Sea.
Cannon Rocks gets its name from the cannons at the end of Alice Road. Historians are not entirely sure which shipwreck these two cannons and accompanying anchor are from, there were so many on this part of the coast. But they are the reason for the town's name.
From the cannons one can do the 7 km Cannon Trail in amongst the forest. It's not a difficult walk and the paths are gentle, but it returns along the beach. Take along water during summer.
The reason Cannon Rocks is well worth bookmarking is its beach, rock pools and spacious shores. The sweep of beach with its sand dunes and swimming beach are beautiful. No less beautiful, it must be said, than Boknes or Kenton-on-Sea. But it is less busy, particularly over Easter or outside of the school holidays.
It's also one of the best kitesurfing places in the world and the annual Cannon Rocks Kiteboarding Classic has placed it on the map.


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Birmingham NEC Skill Show
19 November 2015
Hasan Khan had a great time at the Skills Show; here he tells us about the trip.
On the 19 November fifty Year 10 students headed to the NEC in Birmingham to a skills show about Careers and possible next steps. This skill show gave us a taste of what jobs we can do when we get older. There were many activities there such as aeroplane simulation, oculus rift, car simulation, building and talking on the radio. The trip was very educational and interesting. The thing I enjoyed most was seeing the BMW i8 and talking to the manufacturer about the new software in the car.
Ever wonder how you get clean water from the sink or know how to make a car or even know what it's like sitting in a military vehicle? At the skills show you got to find out. There was also a chance to meet Rockstar the creators of the Grand Theft Auto franchise.
This trip benefited me hugely because it made me know what I want to do when I leave school and how I can get there. There were jobs there I didn't even know about. The famous Theo Paphitis from Dragon's Den had a close encounter with a number of Challney boys!


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Request Free, One-on-one Academic Assessment
For Students Seeking Tutoring in Winterset, We Offer:
One-on-one learning with a certified private in-home tutor
Tutoring at your child's pace & schedule - available 7 days a week
Personalized instruction in the comfort of your home
Tutors that are highly-qualified K-12 and university educators
Our Programs
SchoolTutoring Academy's tutoring programs for Winterset students start with a free academic assessment with an Academic Director. Our flagship tutoring programs are available for $199.99/month which include regular one-on-one tutoring, academic mentorship, bi-monthly progress reports, learning profiles, and parental conference calls.
Winterset District Curriculum Used in Our In-Home Tutoring Programs
Winterset Community School District is home to three schools and roughly 1,700 students. Winterset's K-6 classrooms have begun implementing a new math curriculum called Everyday Math 4. This comprehensive and interactive math curriculum was developed by the University of Chicago's School Mathematics Project and was published by McGraw-Hill Education. The program, which has been successful in many Iowa school districts, focuses on connecting math to the real world, developing students' problem solving skills, and fostering students' independence and persistence in solving problems.
We currently cover the following Winterset-area school district: Winterset Community School District.
Contact our Academic Directors at 1-877-545-7737 to Discuss your Child's Strengths and Areas for Improvement. Get started with Winterset Tutor Today.
A Parent Talks About Finding a Private, In-Home Tutor
Winterset Tutors Can Help Your Student Succeed
SchoolTutoring Academy works with young learners and students, all the way up through high school. We offer Pre-K and Kindergarten Tutoring as well as Elementary School Tutoring to build a strong learning foundation early on. We also offer comprehensive tutoring across all school subjects.
Math Tutoring | Science Tutoring | English Tutoring | Language Programs | Reading Tutoring | Writing Tutoring | SAT/ACT Prep
Our instructors hail from Harvard, Stanford, Duke and other top institutions
Our tutoring in Winterset capabilities are different from what you find in your neighborhood
Staff Tutors with Outstanding Credentials
Our educators have graduated from top academic institutions, and many of them have achieved in the 90th percentile or higher on standardized tests. Equally importantly, they enjoy coaching students across a variety of subject areas and standardized tests
Educators Beyond What You Find Down the Block
Students work collaboratively with their private tutor who is a top-notch college graduate well beyond the academic caliber that you'll typically find in your neighborhood
Experienced Academic Directors to Create and Adjust Learning Plans
Every student is paired up with both a private tutor and an Academic Director responsible for creating a comprehensive learning plan and constantly tweaking it to optimize for results
Fully Customized Programs with Regular Progress Reports
With regular progress reports and archived copies of your lessons, you can easily track your progress and review concepts from past lessons
Meet Our Tutors
Each of them is highly-qualified K-12 and university educators
My name is Michelle O. and I am a certified Calculus Tutor from Bloomington,
My name is Davis H. and I am a certified English Tutor from Greenville, South Carolina.
My name is Jane W. and I am certified SAT/ACT Tutor from San Diego, California.
My name is Ken B. and I am a certified Math and Statistics Tutor from California.
My name is Kevin L. and I am a certified Social Studies Tutor from Guelph, Ontario.
My name is Daniel C. and I am a High School Math, English and Economics.
My name is Amy B. and I am a Math, English Tutor from Darlington, South Carolina.
My name is Owen M. and I am a Math, English, Languages, ACT Tutor from Dundas, Ontario.
My name is Daniel H. and I am an English, ACT, SAT, Social Studies Tutor from Broken Arrow, Oklahoma.
My name is Akosua A. and I am a Math, Science, English, ACT Tutor from Brampton, Ontario.
My name is Davis H. and I am a certified Math, Science, English Tutor from Greenville, South Carolina.
My name is Jania B. and I am a Math, English Tutor from Eight Mile, Alabama.
Educating Our Parents: Understanding the Winterset District Curriculum
The Everyday Math is built around the Iowa Core Curriculum, building connections between concepts, procedures, and applications and focusing on the applying of skills and concepts in new ways and various concepts so that depth of knowledge is constructed. More on Everyday Math can be read on page eight of this newsletter. Focusing on how mathematical models can help make decisions and the role of other mathematical functions in problem-solving helps develop an understanding of how math is applied in the real world.
Winterset's counseling program is undergoing a curriculum review process. The curriculum is based on the Iowa Core Curriculum 21st Century Employability Skills and the American School Counseling Association (ASCA)'s academic standards. The ASCA's standards are organized by Mindsets and Behaviors, which contain the domains of development: academic, career, and social/emotional. Behaviors are categorized into learning strategies, self-management skills, and social skills. The curriculum study process involves establishing goals, determining power standards, designing units of study, and selecting supporting materials.
Testimonials and Case Studies from Our Parents
SchoolTutoring Academy has played an important role in improving our son's confidence and attitude towards school. His grades have also improved steadily throughout the school year.
My daughter was very self-conscious about her difficulties with the math section of the SAT. SchoolTutoring Academy's Academic Directors created an action plan that boosted my daughter's score and confidence level.
SchoolTutoring Academy has not only improved my son's standardized test scores but also his high school math and English grades. Test Prep Academy has not only improved my son's standardized test scores but also his high school math and English grades.
SchoolTutoring Academy Increased My SAT Score By 200 Points
My son's math marks in high school have always been weak so I found it very beneficial that his ACT tutor worked on solidifying his fundamentals while prepping for the ACT.
SchoolTutoring Academy gave my daughter the confidence she needed to boost her SAT score Thank you!
SchoolTutoring has played an important role in improving our son's confidence and attitude towards school. His grades have also improved steadily throughout the school year.
My daughter was able to improve her test scores after a few months of tutoring with SchoolTutoring. However, while raising test scores is great, the real payoff is in the self-confidence that she gained.
I just wanted to send a quick note to say thank-you! My son is very impressed with his tutor and looks forward to each session. What's particularly amazing about this is our son has never really looked forward to math or school for that matter!
We are so happy with the results of your tutoring program and academic support. Homework time was such a stressful evening for the entire evening before we brought your tutors into our home. Thank you for all your help!
Our daughter, a first grader, struggled with basic reading and handwriting. When she began with SchoolTutoring she was almost a year behind her class. Within a year of being enrolled, she is reading above her grade level and has the confidence to match.
Work with our Winterset tutors to help your student succeed! Contact our Academic Directors Today at 1-877-545-7737.
Keeping Informed: Recent Winterset Educational News
- Seventh Graders Learn About Food Production, Help Fight Hunger - For Winterset seventh graders' National History Day Project on "Exploration, Encounter, and Exchange in History," the students studied Norman Borlaug, a Nobel Peace Prize recipient from Iowa known as the father of the Green Revolution who sought to end world hunger and inspire young people to do so. Therefore, in conjunction with this project, the seventh grade teachers decided to take the students on a field trip to the World Food Prize building, where they learned about food production and agriculture around the world and had the opportunity to package meals themselves.
- Winterset Hosts "Post Prom" to Keep Students Safe - Each year, Winterset's Junior Class hosts a Post Prom, a safe, drug- and alcohol-free event available to teens for after the prom ends. The event is inexpensive and keeps the teens off the streets late at night, which is when many teen-related accidents occur. Contributions from local businesses and the Junior Class families typically allow many activities, prizes, and food to be purchased to make the event attractive for the students to attend. Post Prom begins being promoted by students several months before prom.
- Winterset Community School District Hands Out First Honorary Diploma - Winterset CSD handed out its first honorary diploma to a woman who had waited a long time to graduate, 102-year-old Ruth Lampe. Ms. Lampe is active in the community, volunteering in a senior center's kitchen twice a week. Although she had been working out the details with the school district for months, she had no idea the official diploma was coming when it did. Ms. Lampe estimated that she would have graduated in 1931.
Chalk Talk: Resume Tips for Teaching Candidates
A teaching candidate's resume's "Work Experience" section should focus on jobs and internships he/she had that involved working with children. Two of the most common of these types of job titles are camp counselors and tutors. Professional nannying jobs may be listed here, but candidates should refrain from noting minor babysitting jobs they had as teenagers. Of course, educators need to list any previous teaching jobs they have had. Jobs in the professional sector that do not involve working with children can be noted here as well, especially if they involved using such essential skills as writing, working with technology, etc. It is also important to include jobs that are related to the individual's specialized content area; for example, a history teacher working at a museum of artifacts or a science teacher working at a science center.


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Aerospace Studies
The Air Force Reserve Officer Training Corps (AFROTC) program at Boston University offers students an opportunity to earn a commission in the U.S. Air Force while completing graduate or undergraduate degree requirements. The Aerospace Studies curriculum develops leadership skills while familiarizing the student with U.S. Air Force functions, organization, equipment, management, and its role in national defense. The student is commissioned upon successful completion of both the Aerospace Studies curriculum and the Boston University degree requirements. Students typically enter the program during their freshman or sophomore year, but may enter as late as junior year, with some restrictions.
Participation in AFROTC during the first two years of the four-year program carries no commitment to serve in the U.S. Air Force, unless the student has an AFROTC scholarship.


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Despite the stigma that surrounds the controversial dating app, Tinder is actually doing something pretty dope on behalf of International Women's Day on March 8th.
In an interview with Bustle, Tinder's Gloval Vice President Rosette Pambakian goes into detail of the company's motives.
The goal of this campaign is to have a significant impact on women of all ages worldwide, which is the benefit of working with so many incredible women's organizations. We believe that Millennial women will participate most in the #FundHerCause initiative because this group has proven that they want to be part of meaningful social action and the overall conversation through participation in female empowerment movements like the recent women's marches. Tinder understands the importance of this female narrative in all aspects of life and wants the #FundHerCause campaign to serve as another way for women to have their voices heard with a direct impact on other women around the globe."
Using the Twitter hashtag #FundHerCause, the hookup app will be distributing $100 to random people.
If you are given the money, you will be able to choose from the 12 charities Tinder will announce on www.tinder.fund.
All you have to do is tweet #FundHerCause to @Tinder, and describe what you're passionate about.
Hey @Tinder! Planned Parenthood could use your support right now #fundhercause @PPact
— Sarah (@SarahhJaee) March 7, 2017
.@Tinder and #FundHerCause let's do more for women's education!
— Jennifer Marquez (@JennMarquez) March 7, 2017
Tinder is partnered with Pledgeling, an online platform that builds relationships between organizations and their audience.
The feminist movement is stronger than ever, with campaigns like "A Day Without Women" taking place on March 8th.
With recent protests regarding Donald Trump's presidency taking place, everyone should participate in Tinder's campaign.


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"Opulent suites in secluded Montmartre mansion, oozing originality and ooh-la-la"
Inside this classic Directoire townhouse, the 5 strikingly spacious suites are a visual feast; each has been designed by a renowned artist. The result is a stunningly diverse display of contemporary art, centred on creativity and comfort. Downstairs in the Grand Salon, you'll find an impressive menu of French classics with a modern twist in a stylish and elegant surrounding. As evenings draw in, the vibrant Le Très Particulier bar serves fabulous cocktails amid red booths and oversized palms. This is truly fine living à la française.
- Lusciously luxurious suites; of a size you don't often see in Paris, and each one an individual concept by a contemporary artist
- GM Oscar Comtet has done a wonderful job of combining traditional charm with modern luxuries, such as adding an enticing cocktail bar
- Fabulous furnishings throughout, cleverly combining contemporary design pieces with aristocratic antiques
- Exceptional location; slap-bang in one of the most popular parts of Paris, yet the secret setting offers peace and seclusion
- Lush garden, with a clusters of iron-wrought tables and chairs scattered in shady nooks; perfect for a summer breakfast or a spring aperitif
- On our 2018 visit, we felt that service was slipping and some bedrooms in need of maintenance; we recommend you check the latest guest feedback before booking
- Some of the suites have open bathrooms, so you can't be shy about showering in front of your roommate!
- Be aware that Montmartre is the hilly part of Paris, with inescapable sets of stairs and steep streets
- The restaurant is only open Wednesday-Saturday for dinner, and at the weekend for brunch. Advance booking is strongly advised, too
- We've heard reports of noise travelling from the bar to the rooms; it's open until 2am most nights
Best time to go
Our top tips
- Boutique Hotel
- 5
- Restaurant + bar
- All ages welcome
- Open all year
- Pool
- Spa Treatments
- WiFi
- Pet Friendly
- Disabled Access
- Beach Nearby
- Off-street Parking
- Restaurants Nearby
- Air Conditioning
- Guest Lounge
- Terrace
- Garden
- Gym
The 5 suites range in size (and price). The layout of the suites is fairly unusual: some are centred around open bathrooms. Lounge areas have dinky sofas or delicate chaises longues, immense fitted walnut wardrobes, and unique marché aux puces furniture. Huge windows overlook the garden, when open the only audible sound is birdsong.
The theme of each suite is the inspiration of a different artist. We stayed in vast Arbre à Oreilles (Tree with Ears), a glorious blend of greens, browns and golds. We also loved the tape-recorder hidden in the wall, the idea being you leave a message for the next visitor.
Végétale (Vegetal) was a luminous explosion of colour, with the wallpaper as a focal point. Poèmes et Chapeaux (Poems and Hats) is exactly what it says on the tin. Furnished in stark black and white, hats are incorporated into the room (for example, as lamp shades) while poems printed on paper cards dangle precariously.
Vitrine (Vitrine) plays with the contrast of a classical décor against the display of unusual and provoking objects; it also has a private hammam. Finally, Rideau de Cheveux (Curtain of Hair) was just enormous; taking up the whole top floor of the building. The charcoal-and-crème décor has been kept plain to highlight the room's centrepiece - a giant photo of 2 women's faces hidden behind their hair.
Features include:
- Central heating
- DVD player
- Extra beds
- Phone
- Safe box
- Toiletries
- WiFi
Breakfast can be served wherever you want. If the weather's good, your first choice has to be the garden. Its elegance perfectly suits the beautifully presented silver tray, resplendant with steaming pot of coffee, freshly prepared fruit and juice, flaky croissants and crusty baguette (eggs are also offered). On colder mornings you can pick your chair from any of the design pieces in the salon, or choose to sit at a table in the Baroque-style salle à manger, where a full-size guardian angel watches over proceedings.
The restaurant is open for dinner from Wednesday-Saturday (as well as for brunch on weekends), and serves seasonal, French food. You may get Foie Gras or chestnut velouté followed by Rossini beef fillet or deer with puréed parsnips. Puddings are mouth-watering, too. We're yet to try it out, but reports are good - advance booking is strongly recommended. Since our visit, the Le Très Particulier bar has also opened, carving out a reputation for great cocktails and Friday night DJ sets - be warned, noise can sometimes travel to the rest of the hotel.
Of course, you're not exactly short on dining options once you wander outside either. Head down the hill to rue Lepic for a choice of cuisines - although remember that you're going to have to walk back up the steep cobbled street afterwards!
Features include:
- Bar
- Breakfast
- Dinner by arrangement
- Lunch by arrangement
- Restaurants nearby
- Head up the hill to the majestic Sacré-Coeur, ascending the steps for one of the best views of Paris - and it is also well worth a visit inside
- Follow the footsteps of famous ex-Montmartrians such as Utrillo and Renoir by visiting their old house, the Musée de Montmartre in rue Cortot
- Unleash your inner Gaul and spend the evening watching the world-renowned Can-Can at the nearby Moulin Rouge
- Wander over to the lively (if touristy) Place du Tertre and watch the wannabe Picassos at work - and maybe risk insult by commissioning your own caricature portrait
- Meander through the cemetery of Montmartre, searching out some of the celebrated 'residents', which include Emile Zola, Dégas and Alexandre Dumas
Activities on site or nearby include:
- Historical sites
- Museums / galleries
- Nightlife
- Shopping / markets
- Traditional cultures
Children are welcome. The walled garden is great for younger kids, offering security and space to run around in. However, the hotel may be better suited to children who are a little older and able to appreciate the artistic aspects.
Best for:
Babies (0-1 years), Children (4-12 years)
Family friendly accommodation:
If you're a family you might consider booking Rideau de Cheveux, since there is already an extra double bed.
Babysitting is available by arrangement.
For more family-friendly places, see our Kids Collection


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|Brandon Williams <dri...@gmail.com>
|Re: Schema versions reflect schemas on unwanted nodes
|Fri, 14 Oct 2011 22:22:16 GMT
On Fri, Oct 14, 2011 at 2:36 PM, Eric Czech <firstname.lastname@example.com> wrote: > Thanks again. I have truncated certain cf's recently and the cli didn't > complain and listings of the cf rows return nothing after truncation. Is > that data not actually deleted? Hmm, well, now I'm confused because if 3259 is your problem truncate won't work. If it did then it sounds like you have a schema disagreement problem with nodes that are members of the ring. If truncate didn't return an error it did work, however. -Brandon
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By Joel Waxberger
Come, join us on our 3-D tour through the enchanted streets of Yerushalayim (Jerusalem), as we stroll through its narrow alleyways, smell its unique fragrances, and discover ancient secrets hidden in its building stones.
In Jerusalem, even the stones have a special aura. The houses, alleyways, towers and city walls reflect amazing images from the past, unmatched by any other city in the world! Every corner of Yerusholayim whispers secrets of its rich history. It is the Holy City; it is the capital of the nation of Israel. Its stones bring the nation's story to the fore - the events in the past, the tapestry of the present, and hope for the future.
The Beauty of Yerushalayim is part of a series of high-resolution photographs produced with the most-modern technology. The result are a collection of photographs that jump out at the reader in three-dimensions (3D), making a far greater impression than ordinary photographs would. Each photo consists of a number of layers, so that the magic begins from Gelis up and continues to the farthest horizon.
Also on this project: Rabbi Yisroel Gliss, a veteran resident of Jerusalem, guides you through all the sites of the Holy City in a professional manner. In fact, even if you choose to actually travel to Jerusalem, you could use this book as a guide as you make your way through its winding streets.
This English edition was translated by Rabbi Moshe Mizrahi and Rabbi Avie Gold. Rabbi Gold also served as contributing editor of the English version.