text:
Brachylagus idahoensis
|Scope: Global
Language: English
|Scientific Name:
|Brachylagus idahoensis (Merriam, 1891)
Common Name(s):
Sylvilagus idahoensis (Merriam, 1891)
|Taxonomic Notes:
|Brachylagus idahoensis is currently classified as a single species without subspecies designation across the range (Hall 1981). In the past, it was included in the genus Sylvilagus (Hoffmann and Smith 2005).
|Red List Category & Criteria:
|Least Concern ver 3.1
|Year Published:
|Date Assessed:
|Rachlow, J., Becker, P.A. & Shipley, L.
|Battistoni, A.
|Beauvais, G., Sequin, E., Dixon, R., Bosworth, B., Kozlowski, A., Carey, C., Bartels, P., Obradovitch, M., Forbes, T. & Hays, D.
The population status of Brachylagus idahoensis is extremely varied across its discontinuous range, and its dependence on big sagebrush makes it particularly vulnerable to habitat loss from rangeland conversion and fire, and the resulting fragmentation often leads to decreased genetic diversity within populations (Dobler and Dixon 1990). The extirpated Columbia Basin population is being re-introduced. However, there are several robust populations in less disturbed areas, and suitable habitat still exists in many areas.
|Previously published Red List assessments:
|Range Description:
|General: Brachylagus idahoensis occurs throughout the Great Basin and neighbouring intermountain areas, in sagebrush habitat from southwestern Montana and western Wyoming in the east to southwestern Utah in the southeast and an isolated population, which is being reintroduced, in central Washington. The range also includes central Nevada to the north in eastern Oregon and southern Idaho (Dobler and Dixon 1990). Within this wide range, it occurs in patches correlating positively to the density of sagebrush (Dobler and Dixon 1990).
Washington: historically, B. idahoensis occurred in many areas of the Columbia Basin, but the sagebrush habitat has been heavily overgrazed and cleared completely for agriculture in many places. The population in Washington is now isolated from other populations (Dobler and Dixon 1990).
Idaho: Known populations of B. idahoensis are patchy but locally abundant in some areas within the valleys of the east-central region (Lemhi, Birch Creek, Big and Little Lost, and Pahsimeroi Valleys). Recently, isolated populations have been located in Owyhee County in the southwest of the state. Isolated populations also have been documented in the south-central region on the Camas Prairie (Rachlow 2004a).
An understanding of the current status and distribution of populations is limited by sampling effort; intensive surveys for populations have not been conducted in most areas. Within Idaho, agricultural and urban development of the Snake River Plains likely represents a significant barrier dividing populations north and south of the Snake River. Some populations north of the Snake River connect to those in southwestern Montana (including populations on the Continental Divide). South of the Snake River, populations likely connect to those in neighbouring states (Oregon, Nevada, and Wyoming). The Idaho Conservation Data Center (IDCDC) has approximately 180 records of the species in the program's geospatial database, comprising both recent and historical records of occurrence. The World Conservation Union (IUCN) recommends that the area of occupancy be computed by overlaying the distribution of known occurrences with a uniform grid and tallying the area of occupied grid cells. Using a 2-km grid, we calculated the area of occupancy to be 748 km² using IDCDC records. Two important sites are the Idaho National Environmental and Engineering Laboratory (INEEL) and the Lemhi Valley, BLM lands south of Salmon, Idaho. Both areas have received significant research currently or in the past, and both support large populations of pygmy rabbits (Dixon and Bosworth 2004).
Wyoming: Brachylagus idahoensis in Wyoming appears to be widespread throughout the sagebrush-dominated portions of the Bear and Green River Basins. In the Bear River, B. idahoensis is consistently found in good numbers at Fossil Butte National Monument. In the Green River, B. idahoensis is consistently found to the south and west of the towns of Pinedale and Boulder. The species appears to be widespread in the western quarter of the Great Divide Basin as well. The Jack Morrow Hills are known to support several occurrences. There is a single occurrence in the Sweetwater River Basin, just across the divide from the Great Divide Basin, documented in 2003; this signals the need for more sampling in the Sweetwater to determine the actual distribution there. This is the only known occurrence of the species on the east side of the Continental Divide in Wyoming (Beauvais 2004).
Oregon: The range of B. idahoensis in Oregon has not been determined. Recent surveys have found rabbits in Lake, Harney, Malheur, and Deschutes counties. Known areas include Foster Flat, Warner Valley, and north of Sheldon National Wildlife Refuge (NWR) (Carey et al. 2004).
Utah: Occurrences of B. idahoensis in Utah listed in Oliver (2004) have been augmented since the document's printing. Initial survey efforts have focused on the determining of presence or absence, but systematic searches in suitable habitat over large geographic ranges have given us a measure of relative densities. The top three most populous areas include the Western Box Elder County, Northern Rich County, and the Piute/North-western Garfield County. Within these areas, B. idahoensis is considered relatively common. The most notable absence of rabbits occurs throughout the central portion of Utah's Great Basin, which was included in historical estimates of the rabbit's statewide range (Kozlowski 2004).
California: They occur in Mono County California and are abundant from the Bodie Hills to south of Mono Lake. No pygmy rabbits have been relocated to northern California but surveys are on going (Sequin 2004). A recent survey found B. idahoensis present throughout the southern portion of its historic range in California, but did not find active sites in Modoc and Lassen counties in northern California (Larrucea and Brussard 2008).
Nevada: B. idahoensis is found from the state border in the north to the northern end of Nye and Lincoln Counties in the south and from the state border in the east to Vya, Nevada in the west. The pygmy rabbit is still found in most of the higher intermountain regions in the Great Basin Desert of Nevada (Sequin 2004). A recent survey found B. idahoensis present throughout the entire extent of its historic range in Nevada (Larrucea and Brussard 2008).
Montana: They are known from the extreme southwest corner of Montana: Dillon south to Idaho border (Hays 2004).
|Countries occurrence:
Native:United States (California, Idaho, Montana, Nevada, Oregon, Utah, Washington - Reintroduced, Wyoming)
|Additional data:
|Range Map:
|Click here to open the map viewer and explore range.
|Washington: The Columbia Basin population of B. idahoensis was extirpated as of 2004 (Sayler et al. 2007), and is federally listed as endangered. A captive population exists with 21 Columbia Basin specimens of B. idahoensis and 26 rabbits crossed and backcrossed with B. idahoensis from Idaho (Hays 2004). Specimens taken to establish founding population for reintroduction had low reproductivity and high disease susceptibility, probably as a result of inbreeding depression. Intercrossing with B. idahoensis from Idaho was successful in restoring genetic diversity and increasing reproductive levels (Sayler et al. 2007). In March 2007, 20 rabbits were released as part of a reintroduction program in Douglas County, Washington (Oregon Zoo 2007).
Wyoming: The Wyoming Natural Diversity Database (WYNDD; University of Wyoming) has on file 93 records of B. idahoensis observations documented in Wyoming. Very few populations have been studied enough to draw reliable conclusions as to size or trend. The population at Fossil Butte National Monument as been studied at various times in the past, and appears to be rather abundant and persistent. In general, field biologists with good knowledge of B. idahoensis habitat can find individuals with relative ease within the known range of the species in Wyoming. In 2003, WYNDD biologists surveyed two areas outside of known range in the state; B. idahoensis was documented at one of these sites (Sweetwater River watershed, described above). Appropriate habitat is rather abundant and contiguous in southwest Wyoming; cheatgrass has not impacted this area to any great degree (yet) (Beauvais 2004).
Nevada and California: Sizes of populations and abundances of B. idahoensis in an area vary. Certain populations in Nevada are composed of vast expanses of burrows. Other populations may include only one burrow system with only about two rabbits photographed at the site. However, we do not know how far these rabbits can disperse and so do not know what constitutes a single population. Once an area is found to contain B. idahoensis, they are often located throughout the valley in reasonable numbers. Fragmentation of populations is largely unknown since we do not know much about dispersal potential. Juvenile rabbits have been photographed in areas with no burrows, a long way from any known burrow sites. These rabbits may potentially be able to travel farther than we think as long as cover is provided. Fragmentation is a serious issue when fires or agricultural fields remove cover from vast areas (Sequin 2004).
Oregon: In 2000, a survey was conducted at 17 historical sites active in 1995 in southeast Oregon and only three sites contained evidence of current use by B. idahoensis. A 2001-2002 survey of 38 historical sites found evidence of recent use at only one location. However, recent surveys at new sites with habitat attributes preferred by B. idahoensis found evidence of rabbit use. On the Burns BLM district, 54 sites were surveyed and 12 sites showed signs of occupied rabbit use and undetermined use at eight sites (Carey et al. 2004).
Utah: The more surveys that are conducted, the more rabbits are found. Populations of B. idahoensis in the Wyoming Basin, Great Basin, Colorado Basin, and Wasatch Mountains all appear to sustain habitat with robust numbers. It should be noted that to date, little to no attention has been paid to analyzing the density, genetic isolation, or trends of these populations (although surveys to increase our knowledge of these three issues are currently underway). It appears that the habitat that has remained intact since the last statewide examination of B. idahoensis in the 1940s also continues to maintain populations. Although it is clear that significant populations of B. idahoensis (both in terms of area and numbers) still inhabit Utah, overall loss of habitat has occurred since the 1950s, rendering large portions of their historical range unsuitable (Eastern Box Elder County, Central Great Basin, Southwestern Utah) (Kozlowski 2004).
Montana: Rauscher (1997) includes Horse Prairie, Big Sheep Creek, Sage Creek, Centennial Valley, the Sweetwater Basin, The Blacktail Wildlife Management Area, Antelope Flats, and the White Rocks as B. idahoensis range.
Idaho: In Idaho, known populations of B. idahoensis are highly fragmented, with the exception of the east-central valley region (Rachlow 2004b).
|Current Population Trend:
|Additional data:
|Habitat and Ecology:
|General: Brachylagus idahoensis mainly occupies big sagebrush (Artemisia tridentata), especially where the vegetation is very dense. It forms burrows in soft, deep soils, in areas such as alluvial fans, often burrowing into a slope or rise in land elevation (Dobler and Dixon 1990).
As observed in captivity, free-ranging females construct natal burrows that are separate from residential burrow systems. The natal burrows have a single entrance leading to a nest chamber. Entrances to natal burrows are backfilled with soil and often are located at the base of shrubs (Rachlow et al. in prep). Preliminary observations based on radio-telemetry in the Lemhi Valley, Idaho, suggest that B. idahoensis moves longer distances than previously documented (more than 7 km for adults, and more than 6 km for juvenile rabbits) (Rachlow et al. in prep).
Brachylagus idahoensis is preyed upon by coyotes (Canis latrans), badgers (Taxidea taxus), weasels (Mustela frenata), bobcats (Lynx rufus), great horned owls (Bubo virginianus), long-eared owls (Asio otus), northern harriers (Circus cyaneus) (Dobler and Dixon 1990) and red foxes (Vulpes vulpes) (Green and Flinders 1980).
Wyoming: In Wyoming, B. idahoensis appears to follow the general accepted patterns of habitat use: an affinity for tall and dense sagebrush growing on friable soils. A few documented observations are from areas with only short and sparse sagebrush; there is some speculation (and only speculation) that B. idahoensis can occupy this type of habitat when wind is persistent enough to keep even short sagebrush exposed in the winter (i.e. the true habitat requirement is sagebrush exposed in winter, which in most areas is tall sagebrush, but in a few windy sites may be otherwise). Alternatively, these observations may represent juveniles dispersing through non-typical environments. In landscapes where short and sparse sagebrush is the matrix surrounding island patches of tall and dense sagebrush, B. idahoensis can be reliably found in the islands. Several field workers in south-west Wyoming have independently remarked that B. idahoensis tends to be most frequently found in an elevation band from approximately 6,500-7,500 ft (Beauvais 2004).
Nevada: Brachylagus idahoensis in Nevada seems to have similar habitat preferences as rabbits found in other states. They require loamy soils with big sagebrush. They can be located throughout entire valleys, but when not, they generally tend to be found in the largest, most dense clumps of sagebrush on appropriate soils. They have been located in areas with practically no understory (example: Reese Valley) as well as in areas with a heavy understory of forbs and bunch grasses (Sheldon Preserve). There may be competition between B. idahoensis and cottontail rabbits. Areas with high understory often have both rabbit types while areas with moderate understory only have cottontails. These cottontails have been found to be living in burrows that may have originally been made by B. idahoensis. In areas with practically no understory, B. idahoensis has been found with no cottontails (Sequin 2004).
California: Brachylagus idahoensis in California has similar habitat requirements to those in Nevada. However, the rabbits around Mono Lake are found in soils that have a higher sand content than populations found in Nevada. They are often found in "loamier" inclusions in stabilized sand dunes. Also, the rabbits in the Bodie area live at very high elevations (8,400+ ft). These rabbits are found in loamy soils in relatively low sagebrush (about 2-3 ft). They are still more likely to be found in the largest and densest sagebrush in the area (Sequin 2004).
Utah: Habitat use by B. idahoensis as inferred from burrow placement and distribution of pellets indicates preferential use of the densest patches of sagebrush available on the landscape. Use of sagebrush species (Artemisia tridentata tridentata, A. t.vaseyana, A. t. wyomingensis, and Artemisia arbuscula) and heights (30-60 cm) varies considerably with elevation and latitude. It should also be noted that numerous sites considered by range specialists to be "overgrazed" (maintains its sagebrush over story, but exhibits substantial loss of grass and forb understory) contained large numbers of B. idahoensis. This, combined with their use of roadsides and disturbed edge, indicated that rabbits in Utah seem relatively flexible in their use of habitat, given sagebrush maintains proper canopy cover. Extensive snow tracking has been conducted in populations of the Wyoming Basin (Rich County). Initial analysis of non-dispersal movements indicated regular movements of 0.5-1.0 km within the first six hours after a fresh snowfall (Kozlowski 2004).
|Use and Trade:
Washington: No take of B. idahoensis is occurring (no known wild animals); no take is legal (Hays 2004).
Wyoming: It is reasonable to assume that a few pygmy rabbits are killed each year by hunters who mistake them for cottontails. Although estimates have not been made, this is not suspected to be a large source of mortality (Beauvais 2004).
Nevada and California: Officially B. idahoensis is listed as a game species in both CA and NV. However it is not often hunted (Sequin 2004).
Oregon: There is no significant utilization of B. idahoensis except for some incidental hunting (Carey et al. 2004).
Utah: Utilization of the B. idahoensis in Utah is low. Some incidental take may occur during the legal harvesting of cottontail species. Articles addressing this issue have been included in the state's Small Game Proclamation both to help mitigate direct mortality, but also facilitate the communication of additional distribution information (Kozlowski 2004).
Idaho: Although previously classified as an upland game species, hunting was banned for B. idahoensis in Idaho in 2002. There may be incidental take of the species by hunters pursuing other lagomorphs (Rachlow 2004b).
Montana: No hunting season (Rauscher 1997).
|Major Threat(s):
General: Brachylagus idahoensis is dependent on big sagebrush (Artemisia tridentata), it is particularly sensitive to habitat loss. Fires that are more frequent due to the increase of invasive cheatgrass, conversion to cropland and rangeland are contributors to loss of sagebrush habitat. Isolation of populations due to fragmentation of suitable habitat cause bottlenecks that threaten subpopulations. Dispersal is limited in fragmented populations, because B. idahoensis will not cross large open areas (Dobler and Dixon 1990).
Washington: In Washington, B. idahoensis is threatened by loss of deep soil shrub-steppe habitat, increase in fire frequencies due to cheatgrass invasion. Fires have the potential to remove sagebrush from vast areas. A recent fire in Washington State burned 66,000 hectares just outside the historic range of B. idahoensis. There are 417,000 hectares within the historic range of B. idahoensis in Washington with soil types where rabbits have been located. Of that amount, 27,000 acres remain in shrub-steppe today, and much of that has been degraded through fire and agricultural practices. Change in abundance and foraging of native predators due to habitat change are potential threats range wide that are largely unstudied (Hays 2004).
Wyoming: Although cheatgrass is not yet a major problem in southwest Wyoming, it is thought to be only a matter of time before it begins to dominate here as it has in states to the west. Also petroleum exploration and development is expected to increase markedly here, with consequent increase in sagebrush removal, alteration of fire cycles, increased road density, and increased potential for cheatgrass and other noxious weed establishment. Habitat managers appear to support more prescribed burning of tall and dense sagebrush, primarily to increase forage for big game and improve habitat for sage grouse. There is only occasional attention being paid to how this might harm B. idahoensis, as well as other vertebrates with similar habitat affinities (e.g. sage thrashers, sage sparrows). Heavy livestock grazing has the potential to reduce habitat quality for B. idahoensis, but it is important to recognize that southwest Wyoming was historically grazed by bison and white-tailed prairie dogs (Cynomys leucurus) with the latter species persisting into the present. Grazing by domestic sheep, cattle, horses, and feral horses occurs today, but was probably more intense and pervasive in the early 20th century and B. idahoensis are presumed to have persisted through that period. Disturbance of habitat in the vicinity of Bear Lake (ID) may reduce the already tentative connectivity between Wyoming populations and those to the west (Beauvais 2004).
Nevada and California: The main threat to B. idahoensis in Nevada and California is fragmentation due to vast fires. (These fires have extirpated populations from entire valleys and without leaving any cover behind may not allow rabbits to repopulate the area.) This is a severe problem that will most likely become greater with increasing cheatgrass invasion across Nevada. Agricultural fields are also a threat. Not only are they usually placed on the same loamy soils the rabbits prefer, but they also create a potentially impassable barrier and may increase the habitat suitability for cottontails. Road systems may also be a larger barrier to dispersal that we may think. In night-time road transect surveys in areas with known ratios of jackrabbits/cottontails/B. idahoensis, B. idahoensis was consistently significantly under-represented. This may be due to their reluctance to cross open areas (Sequin 2004).
Oregon: Threats to B. idahoensis in Oregon include fire (natural and managed), flooding, conversion to agriculture, exotic plants, decadence and overgrazing. The accumulative effects of the threats have contributed to habitat fragmentation and the isolation of populations (Carey et al. 2004).
Utah: The primary threat to B. idahoensis at this time is habitat loss. Loss occurs as a result of human development (historic losses: Wasatch Front north of Salt Lake; current losses: southwestern portion of the state in the vicinity of Cedar City), conversion to cultivated agriculture (northwestern portion of the Great Basin), degradation of plant communities due to overgrazing (widespread), increased fire frequency due to invasive weed understory (Great Basin), and large scale range improvement projects favouring the creation of large openings in mature sagebrush (Wyoming Basin, Lower Wasatch Range). As populations get smaller and more isolated, predators and disease may play more prominent roles as threats (Kozlowski 2004).
Idaho: Brachylagus idahoensis is threatened in Idaho by loss and/or modification of habitat including agricultural and urban development, invasive weeds, and changes in fire frequencies (Rachlow 2004b).
Montana: Rauscher (1997) mentions fragmentation of B. idahoensis habitat resulting from projects to improve rangeland for cattle as a threat (sagebrush is removed). He qualified that by stating that the rabbit is somewhat resilient and has the ability to use sites that were previously disturbed.
|Conservation Actions:
General: Greater sage-grouse range overlaps with B. idahoensis range. Conservation of sage-grouse is a big issue and a federal listing may occur. Conservation of sage-grouse will likely benefit B. idahoensis to a significant degree. However, fire is being used to restore shrub-steppe and sage-grouse range in places, and although agencies are starting to include B. idahoensis in planning, it does not always happen (Hays 2004).
Washington: Brachylagus idahoensis from the Columbia Basin are federally listed as endangered. A recovery plan is being prepared, a captive breeding program is in place, habitat acquisition is proceeding, habitat management has changed, surveys have proceeded, reintroduction sites have been selected, and reintroduction techniques have been developed (Hays 2004). The reintroduction plan involves intercross breeding of B. idahoensis from the Columbia Basin with intraspecific rabbits from Idaho because of the bottleneck of genetic diversity caused by an extremely small population size (Sayler et al. 2007). The plan outlines reintroductions in 2007, followed by monitoring through the year for survival, dispersal, and reproductive success, and then a second reintroduction in early 2008 to augment the established population (Sayler et al. 2007). In March 2007, the first reintroduction of 20 rabbits bred by the Oregon Zoo were released in Douglas county, Washington, eight of which will be tracked by radio collar (Oregon Zoo 2007).
Wyoming: In Wyoming, B. idahoensis occurs on Fossil Butte National Monument; small population segments may extend onto Seedskadee and Bear River Meadows National Wildlife Refuges. These are all rather small and isolated protected areas. The vast majority of B. idahoensis populations in Wyoming occur on surfaces managed for multiple uses by the USDI Bureau of Land Management (BLM). A lesser amount of state and private land within the BLM matrix also supports rabbits. The USDA Forest Service may manage some small population segments at the high-elevation periphery of the species distribution. B. idahoensis is on the Sensitive Species list of the Wyoming State Office of the BLM, which requires that agency to consider the effects of management actions on B. idahoensis (Beauvais 2004).
Nevada: There is increased awareness but otherwise no conservation actions for B. idahoensis in Nevada. B. idahoensis populations are located in the Sheldon National Wildlife Refuge, as well as in the Great Basin National Park (Sequin 2004).
California: B. idahoensis is located at Mono Lake and Bodie State Historic Park and receive protection in these areas (Sequin 2004).
Oregon: Surveys are being conducted throughout the historic range of B. idahoensis in Oregon and additional surveys are planned for fall 2004 and 2005. A Master's student is studying habitat at Sheldon NWR. Also, a small telemetry project is underway. The BLM and Hart Mountain National Wildlife Refuge are now surveying for B. idahoensis prior to management activities such as road work and controlled burns (Carey et al. 2004). The Oregon Zoo has provided a source population for reintroductions of B. idahoensis in the Columbia Basin, Washington (Oregon Zoo 2007).
Utah: Brachylagus idahoensis is listed in Utah as a Species of Special Concern, and has been the focus of three ambitious grants designed to assess the effects of current land treatment practices on B. idahoensis, to examine historical trends in habitat loss, and to develop a statewide habitat model to increase management efficiency of the species (Kozlowski 2004).
Idaho: Current actions include increased survey efforts to document the occurrence of B. idahoensis within its range, and research into its ecology and habitat requirements. Captive breeding has been established for the Columbian Basin DPS and experimental reintroductions have been initiated for the species. Loss and/or modification of habitat include agricultural and urban development, invasive weeds, and changes in fire frequencies (Rachlow 2004). In 2004, 42 captive-bred rabbits were released into the wild at the Idaho National Laboratory for a study intended to evaluate techniques to be used for future Columbia Basin, Washington population reintroductions. Less than half survived more than 18 days, but survival may have been more successful if release pens were more protected from predators and if the rabbits had been released farther apart (Sayler et al. 2007).
Montana: Brachylagus idahoensis is listed as a species of special concern by Montana Natural Heritage Program (Rauscher 1997).
|Rachlow, J., Becker, P.A. & Shipley, L. 2016. Brachylagus idahoensis. The IUCN Red List of Threatened Species 2016: e.T2963A45176206. . Downloaded on 25 September 2018.
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Expedia-Verified Reviews
Don't miss out on a lower price on this hotel
Get an overview of this hotelLandmark hotel overlooking Halifax Public Gardens
Popular property highlights
Guests say they love
- Walkable location
- Family-friendly amenities
- Overall value of stay
- Overall room comfort
Overlooking the Halifax Public Gardens and Spring Garden Road, this hotel is 3 blocks from Metro Centre and Dalhousie University.
Property Amenities
Business amenities at The Lord Nelson Hotel & Suites include wireless Internet access in public areas, the conference room, and a business center.
The Lord Nelson Hotel & Suites offers wireless and wired high-speed Internet access, pay movies, and coffee/tea makers in all guestrooms.
Languages Spoken
- English
The Lord Nelson Hotel & Suites
Hotel Amenities
Hotel Amenities
Across the street from the Halifax Public Gardens, this renovated historic landmark hotel is within one km (a half-mile) of the World Trade and Convention Centre, the Halifax waterfront, and major museums and attractions.
Amenities at The Lord Nelson Hotel & Suites include a fitness center, business center and a conference room. Complimentary wireless Internet access is available in most public areas and high-speed Internet access in the business center is also complimentary. Concierge services are also on offer. Enjoy the garden onsite as well.
Valet and self-parking are available in an underground parking garage (surcharges). Smoke-free property.
- Bar/lounge
- Elevator/lift
- Fitness facilities
- 24-hour front desk
- Business center
- Conference space
- Porter/bellhop
- Restaurant
- Express check-out
- Free WiFi
- Dry cleaning/laundry service
- Self parking (surcharge)
- Valet parking (surcharge)
- Free wired Internet
- Limo or Town Car service available
- Smoke-free property
- Safe-deposit box at front desk
- Luggage storage
- Breakfast available (surcharge)
- ATM/banking
- Concierge services
- Laundry facilities
- Total number of rooms - 262
- One meeting room
- Number of floors - 9
- Wedding services
- Airport transportation (surcharge)
- Garden
- Multilingual staff
- Free newspapers in lobby
Family Friendly Amenities
- Family Hotel
- Free Wi-Fi
- Laundry facilities
- Refrigerator
Available in all rooms: Free WiFi , Free wired Internet
Available in some public areas: Free WiFi , Free wired Internet
Languages Spoken
- English
- Arabic
- Chinese
- French
- Hebrew
- Portuguese
- Spanish
Self parking (surcharge), Valet parking (surcharge)
Room Amenities
- Pay movies
- Premium bedding
- Room service (limited hours)
- Free newspaper
- Air conditioning
- In-room climate control (air conditioning)
- Free local calls
- Refrigerator
- Minibar
- Coffee/tea maker
- Private bathroom
- Free toiletries
- Hair dryer
- Shower/tub combination
- Cable TV service
- In-room safe (laptop compatible)
- Iron/ironing board
- Desk
- Free wired Internet
- Number of bathrooms -
- Daily housekeeping
- Free WiFi
Where to Eat
The Arms - Located off the lobby. Casual dining, seasonal terrace. Overlooking the gardens. Traditional English-pub and international fare. Full bar. Lunch and dinner are served. A buffet breakfast is available (surcharge).
Room service - Available from early morning until late evening.
If you have requests for specific accessibility needs, please note them at check-out when you book your room.
- Accessible bathroom
- Roll-in shower
- In-room accessibility
Hotel Policies
Minimum check-in age is 19
Special check-in instructions:
Check-out time is noon
Payment types
Children and extra beds
- Children are welcome.
- Kids stay free! Children 18 years old and younger stay free when using existing bedding.
- Rollaway/extra beds are available for CAD 40.00 per day.
- Cribs (infant beds) are available for CAD 20.00 per day.
- Pets allowed for an extra charge of CAD 60.00 per pet, per stay
- Dogs and cats only
You need to know
Extra-person charges may apply and vary depending on property policy.
- Deposit: CAD 100.00 per stay
Optional extras
- Fee for buffet breakfast: CAD 17.50 per person (approximately)
- Airport shuttle fee: CAD 63.00 per vehicle (one way)
- Self parking fee: CAD 28.00 per day
- Valet parking fee: CAD 40.00 per day
- Pet fee: CAD 60.00 per pet, per stay
- Early check-in fee: CAD 30.00 (subject to availability)
- Late check-out fee: CAD 15$ per hour (subject to availability)
- Crib (infant bed) fee: CAD 20.00 per day
- Rollaway bed fee: CAD 40.00 per day
Hotel Name
- Hotel Lord Nelson
- Lord Nelson Halifax
- Lord Nelson Hotel
- Lord Nelson Hotel Halifax
- The Lord Nelson Hotel And Suites
- The Lord Nelson Hotel & Suites Halifax, Nova Scotia
- The Lord Nelson Hotel Halifax
We should mention
This property offers transfers from the airport (surcharges may apply). Guests must contact the property with arrival details before travel, using the contact information on the booking confirmation. Children 18 years old and younger stay free when occupying the parent or guardian's room, using existing bedding.

subset: commoncrawl


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The Times (London) reports that women in Naples are staging a sex strike in an attempt to stop their menfolk from setting off New Year fireworks that are said to cause injury and even death. Carolina Staiano is the leader of the strike. Ms. Staiano poses the stark choice:
"If a sex strike is what it takes in order to get the attention of our men, husbands, partners and sons, then we're ready for it," she told ANSA, the Italian news agency. "This time they're just going to have to choose: sex or fireworks."
She said it, not me. Somehow I think the movement falls a little short of the original portrayed by Aristophanes.
To comment on this post, go here.


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Out of a decent respect for the opinion of mankind, it is customary to give such excuses as "threatening weather" or "wet field." there is nothing in the world, though, to prevent me from saying the field is unfit because I had a nosebleed behind first base.
Bill Veeck Veeck as in Wreck p 163
Each State shall appoint, in such Manner as the Legislature thereof may direct, a Number of Electors, equal to the whole Number of Senators and Representatives to which the State may be entitled in the Congress:
Article 2 Section 1 US Constitution
A while back Both Smitty & I took umbrage at the Mass State legislature attempting to disenfranchise me making a change to the way electors are selected in the state but while I still am upset at the change I pointed out that constitutionally the legislature was perfectly within its rights.
Now however the left is getting nervous because the GOP has figured out they can play this same game to their advantage.
In September, top Pennsylvania Republicans shocked the nation by proposing a change to the state's election rules that would have rigged the Electoral College in favor of Mitt Romney. Facing a nationwide backlash, the state's GOP backed down—but not before Wisconsin Republicans considered a similar plan. With the old rules still in place, President Barack Obama won a 332-206 electoral college victory over Romney.
But now that Romney has been defeated, prominent GOPers are once again mulling rule changes that could make it harder for Democrats to win the White House—and easier for Republicans to claim Electoral College votes in states where they lose the popular vote.
Maybe it's just me but I don't recall Mother Jones objecting when Massachusetts made the move to eventually discard my electoral influence.
At Outside the beltway James Joyner comments:
Awarding the entirely of a state's votes to even a narrow winner makes no sense whatsoever. And, in the cases of states where one party has a decisive advantage, they might as well not bother to hold elections, since the outcome is inevitable. Given the incredible difficulty of amending the Constitution and the fact that the popular vote winner ultimately prevails almost all the time, we're not going to abolish the Electoral College. Reforming it so that it more accurately reflects election outcomes, though, is within the power of individual state legislatures. So long as it's done well enough in advance, I don't find that problematic. Even when, as is unarguably the case here, it's motivated by partisan advantage rather than philosophical purity.
My thoughts are a tad different.
One of the things that tends to drive me nuts about the GOP is their unwillingness to take off the gloves, too afraid of what the media and the democrats will say ignoring the fact that the left, the media and the Democrats (who are pretty much the same thing) are going to object no matter what the GOP does.
That being the case the best choice is to ignore them and do what you want to do, or better yet what your supporters elected you to do.
The problem is simple, it is virtually impossible to police the cities where the Democrats own the black vote in the same way that the bosses of old once did. That being the case I'd like to see a lot more of this kind of thing in states where we can pull it off and as we have the legislatures in many states that went Obama we can do it and the left, at the moment, can't.
People (well the left) might say it's not fair, well TOUGH! It is explicitly constitutional and all the media hype or complaints in the world doesn't change it.
If Pennsylvania wants to give their votes proportionally they can do it and if the democrats don't like it they can win seats in the legislature and stop it.
Because if the GOP legislature in Pennsylvania were really serious they could allocate electors in the state based on the popular vote results in Wyoming or by a vote of attendees at CPAC 2013, (they could charge $1,000,000 a head and sell out every time) or perhaps a majority vote of the authors at DaTechGuy blog with ties being decided by the owner.
And it would be perfectly legal and constitutional.
It sure would make me a lot more popular.


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Layoffs to begin at Tenneco
City, state, county officials market building, help employees.
Some jobs will end at Tenneco Monroe in Cozad in four weeks.
As the shock-absorber manufacturing business winds down operations, layoffs are scheduled quarterly through the end of 2010.
Officials announced on Sept. 22 that the plant—with 500 employees—would close the end of 2010 largely because demand for its products has dropped.
Jay Edwards, human resources director at the plant, said 26 employees will transfer to a Tenneco plant in Paragould, AR, by Dec. 31 while 16 others have chosen not to move.
"Their jobs will end the end of December," Edwards said, noting that two employees are interested in relocating to another Tenneco plant in Hartwell, GA.
Cozad employees who can perform the same or similar job in Paragould were offered that opportunity and some agreed to go, he said.
More jobs end next spring
Edwards said jobs for a larger group of Tenneco employees will end the first quarter of 2010 in March and April with another layoff scheduled in June and July.
One more layoff could occur in September/October before the plant closes in December.
"As our business transfers, people can move with the business or not and receive severance pay and go from there," he said.
Because a Tenneco plant in Seward received additional business, Edwards said Tenneco officials hope there will be more transfer opportunities.
Edwards, who has been human resources manager at the plant for almost 13 years, said closure is not something they want to see happen.
"But it's important it's handled correctly so people know the options available to them so they can make a good decision on what to do with the rest of their lives," he said. "At this point, our folks have been extremely positive in their approach and our plant continues to perform very well."
That's indicative of Tenneco employees and "how they want to make sure they go out the right way," Edwards said.
City, county and state officials have been far from idle since company officials announced the closure.
Cozad Development Corporation and the Nebraska Department of Economic Development are trying to market the building while others, like Jen Wolf and CDC director Robyn Geiser, are actively marketing Cozad and the Tenneco and recently vacated Tabora Farms Bakery buildings at national conventions and conferences, according to Wolf who directs Dawson Area Development.
Marketing challenges exist
Wolf, who directs Dawson Area Development, said it's difficult to market the Tenneco building because it won't be vacant until 2011.
Still, she and other officials like Geiser, are getting the word out about Cozad and the Tenneco and Tabora Farms buildings.
Wolf will travel to Ft. Lauderdale, FL, next week to market the buildings to 30 site selectors.
Companies hire site selectors to locate communities suited to their environments, she explained, noting that a site selector chose North Platte for the Walmart distribution center because of transportation and warehousing opportunities in the area.
Although Wolf said she'd like to keep displaced Tenneco employees in the county, she said the Paragould plant was aggressive in giving them the same shift, the ability to select the same position and pay a transfer allowance.
Because several employees have found new jobs, DAD postponed a scheduled job fair in November until January.
Wolf noted that employees who lose their job at Tenneco are eligible for job benefits and for training within a two-year period before entering a different career.
Training costs include books, tuition and mileage.
For employees more than 50 years of age, new trade training benefits are available for up to two years if they are hired at a lower wage than what they made at Tenneco.
Wolf said employees have and will continue to receive help with financial planning and interview and resume writing skills, counseling and who to contact for help.
"There is so much information that a lot of the employees we've visited with are confused," she said. "I think people are overwhelmed with all the decisions they have to make."
Development plan in works
Wolf said DAD, Tenneco and Lexington and Cozad city officials are also moving forward with the Nebraska Department of Labor and the Economic Development Administration on a regional economic development plan.
"We're eligible for some money to help create a plan that identifies the impact (of Tenneco's closing) on our area and strategies to help mitigate that impact," she said, noting that money could be used to hire a consultant.
Included in the that plan is one for entrepreneurship for small businesses that will be affected by the plant's closing.
"That could be service providers to Tenneco like restaurants and cleaning services," Wolf said.
Some Tenneco employees have also expressed interest in starting new businesses like a machine shop or catering business.
"These are all kinds of possibilities," she said.
Wolf said she thinks there are opportunities created by the closing of Tenneco.
"I hate to see Tenneco go," she said, "but as one door closes, several more will open."
Tenneco's hourly workforce in Cozad includes 50 employees from Gothenburg with 115 from Lexington. Forty-four are from other towns and the remainder—252—are residents of Cozad.
There are 39 salaried employees.
Job opportunities are posted on Web sites like dawsoncountycareers.com and nebraskaworkforce.com.
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How's: easily 20kts...most kites under 9M..and then this afternoon I counted 33 at about 4:30pm. Amazing place where beginners and pro's all share the same area. The windsurfers are far away and kiter's all get along. Everybody launches and catches.
The beginners start way upwind and end up way downwind, but the pro's don't scream. Everybody is very cool about it.
Only one time did I see two very good guys crossup. French, Dutch or German is spoken everywhere. Lucky me - English is also accepted. The locals are pretty focused on Spanish but Hell it's their home.
All Toby's friends from the magazine are here, as is the reported designer of F-One (I don't know what he looks like). Leave any foil home. Directionals too. This is 4-line/TT country. One one ARC was out being tested by the magazine. No civilians showed up with ARC's or foils (I'm leaving mine in the bag)
Mostly Naish and Wipi, but AirRush Lifts, Takoons, Boosters, etc. The good news is the R3's and Free Airs were mixing it up perfectly with all the new kites.
Oh ya - very important - the place is CHEAP. Compared to any other Carib resort area, I'll be this is half the cost. I picked the wrong hotel, but I post my report after I move up towards the kite area. I am now too close to town.
My North 12M was too big today, but I'll get an early start manana. More later.
Wish you were here - well, maybe next week.


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Pheidippides is said to have run at about 23 rides and hour when he dashed through the Marathon plateau to get the news of Greek victory over Persians to Athens. A ride is said to be 4 stadia, which is in turn 6 plethra(if I remember it correctly). I read this from an college physics textbook(Halliday & Resnick) and tried to find out what a ride is in Greek, but I couldn't find one. A [face=SPIonic]i(/ppeuma[/face] is what I think to be a candidate. But the dictionary definitions don't mention anything about it as a unit of distance.
http://www.smaphysics.ca/phys30s/int30s/convert2.html See Prob. 2


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Asteroid belts of just the right size are friendly to life
Solar systems with life-bearing planets may be rare if they are dependent on the presence of asteroid belts of just the right mass, according to two US astronomers. Rebecca Martin, a NASA Sagan Fellow from the University of Colorado and astronomer Mario Livio of the Space Telescope Science Institute in Baltimore present the new research in a paper in Monthly Notices of the Royal Astronomical Society: Letters.
They suggest that the size and location of an asteroid belt, shaped by the evolution of the Sun's protoplanetary disk and by the gravitational influence of a nearby giant Jupiter-like planet, may determine whether complex life will evolve on an Earth-like planet.
This might sound surprising because asteroids are considered a nuisance due to their potential to impact the Earth and trigger mass extinctions. But an emerging view proposes that asteroid collisions with planets may provide a boost to the birth and evolution of complex life.
Asteroids may have delivered water and organic compounds to the early Earth. According to the theory of punctuated equilibrium, occasional asteroid impacts might accelerate the rate of biological evolution by disrupting a planet's environment to the point where species must try new adaptation strategies.
The astronomers based their conclusion on an analysis of theoretical models and archival observations of extrasolar Jupiter-sized planets and debris disks around young stars. "Our study shows that only a tiny fraction of planetary systems observed to date seem to have giant planets in the right location to produce an asteroid belt of the appropriate size, offering the potential for life on a nearby rocky planet," said Martin, the study's lead author. "Our study suggests that our solar system may be rather special."
Martin and Livio suggest that the location of an asteroid belt relative to a Jupiter-like planet is not an accident. The asteroid belt in our solar system, located between Mars and Jupiter, is a region of millions of space rocks that sits near the "snow line," which marks the border of a cold region where volatile material such as water ice are far enough from the Sun to remain intact. At the time when the giant planets in our solar system were forming, the region just beyond the snow line contained a dense mix of ices, rock, and metals that provided enough material to build giant planets like Jupiter.
When Jupiter formed just beyond the snow line, its powerful gravity prevented nearby material inside its orbit from coalescing and building planets. Instead, Jupiter's influence caused the material to collide and break apart. These fragmented rocks settled into an asteroid belt around the Sun.
"To have such ideal conditions you need a giant planet like Jupiter that is just outside the asteroid belt [and] that migrated a little bit, but not through the belt," Livio explained. "If a large planet like Jupiter migrates through the belt, it would scatter the material. If, on the other hand, a large planet did not migrate at all, that, too, is not good because the asteroid belt would be too massive. There would be so much bombardment from asteroids that life may never evolve."
In fact, during the solar system's infancy, the asteroid belt probably had enough material to make another Earth, but Jupiter's presence and its small migration towards the Sun caused some of the material to scatter. Today, the asteroid belt contains less than one per cent of its original mass. Using our solar system as a model, Martin and Livio proposed that asteroid belts in other solar systems would always be located approximately at the snow line. To test their proposal, Martin and Livio created models of protoplanetary disks around young stars and calculated the location of the snow line in those disks based on the mass of the central star.
They then looked at all the existing space-based infrared observations from NASA's Spitzer Space Telescope of 90 stars having warm dust, which could indicate the presence of an asteroid belt-like structure. The temperature of the warm dust was consistent with that of the snow line. "The warm dust falls right onto our calculated snow lines, so the observations are consistent with our predictions," Martin said.
The duo then studied observations of the 520 giant planets found outside our solar system. Only 19 of them reside outside the snow line, suggesting that most of the giant planets that may have formed outside the snowline have migrated too far inward to preserve the kind of slightly-dispersed asteroid belt needed to foster enhanced evolution of life on an Earth-like planet near the belt. Apparently, less than four per cent of the observed systems may actually harbour such a compact asteroid belt.
"Based on our scenario, we should concentrate our efforts to look for complex life in systems that have a giant planet outside of the snow line," Livio said.
Science contacts
Rebecca Martin
Mario Livio
Media contacts
Donna Weaver / Ray Villard
Robert Massey
Further information
The new work will appear today in: "On the formation and evolution of asteroid belts and their potential significance for life, Rebecca G. Martin and Mario Livio", Monthly Notices of the Royal Astronomical Society: Letters (published by Oxford University Press).The paper can be seen at http://mnrasl.oxfordjournals.org/content/early/2012/10/27/mnrasl.sls003.full
For illustrations and more information about this study, visit:
Notes for editors
The Hubble Space Telescope is a project of international cooperation between NASA and the European Space Agency. NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center in Greenbelt, Maryland, USA, manages the telescope. The Space Telescope Science Institute (STScI) in Baltimore, Maryland, conducts Hubble science operations. STScI is operated by the Association of Universities for Research in Astronomy, Inc., in Washington, D.C., USA.
The Royal Astronomical Society (RAS, www.ras.org.uk), founded in 1820, encourages and promotes the study of astronomy, solar-system science, geophysics and closely related branches of science. The RAS organizes scientific meetings, publishes international research and review journals, recognizes outstanding achievements by the award of medals and prizes, maintains an extensive library, supports education through grants and outreach activities and represents UK astronomy nationally and internationally. Its more than 3500 members (Fellows), a third based overseas, include scientific researchers in universities, observatories and laboratories as well as historians of astronomy and others.
Follow the RAS on Twitter via @royalastrosoc


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Intimidation? Open carry is notEDITORIAL
January 14. 2013 1:13AM
If you ride around town with a hunting rifle in the rear window of your pickup truck, are you intimidating your community? Few people would think so. What if you take a walk with a handgun holstered at your side?
Rep. Delmar Burridge, D-Keene, thinks the person bearing the handgun openly is engaging in a hostile act. Speaking of people who openly bear arms while going to the town clerk's office to pay their taxes, he said, "Why subject public employees to this kind of intimidation?"
To spare these employees such horrors, he has introduced a bill that would make it illegal to openly carry a firearm in a public place - unless the owner has obtained a concealed carry permit. "I'm trying to bring some sanity back into it," Burridge told this newspaper last week. "One person can have more fire power than the Continental Army facing the British at Bunker Hill. That's ludicrous."
What is ludicrous is requiring a concealed carry permit for the act of carrying a weapon openly. What in the world is the point? It would not prevent open-carrying, it would just make it inconvenient, which is silly. This is not a bill to protect the people. It is the irrational fear of guns written into a feel-good measure that will make no one safer.
And by the way, the patriot militiamen at Bunker Hill lost the battle because they ran out of ammunition. It is rather easy to be better armed than they were. And in any case, their humble supply of munitions really has no bearing on how a citizen should be allowed to exercise his Second Amendment right to bear arms, which many men died that day and in the years thereafter to protect.
Crime, law and justice Politics Public Safety Social issues Editorial


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The Hot Swappable LifeShareThis
by Ron Daly
A business associate was telling me a crazy story just the other day. He was holding out his credit card to pay for lunch and I noticed it was a shiny, newly-issued card.
"Just get that card?" I asked.
"Yeah," he said, glumly. I was confused.
"Why do you sound so sad about it? You just got a brand new card."
"This is my fourth issue of this card," he said. "Our account information has been compromised four times now."
You could've knocked me over with a feather. Four times?! He explained that the first time, the card was cloned and used to make several cash withdrawals up and down the Pennsylvania Turnpike. The second time it yielded no charges, but the bank reissued the card to be on the safe side, owing to a hacking attempt they had suffered. The third time the card was issued was because of the Target breach. The fourth was related to another internal breach that occurred recently.
What was so shocking about the most recent reissue, he told me, was how quickly it happened. The card company called his wife on a Friday to tell them about the breach and the reissue. Their cards were deactivated as early as Friday afternoon.
On Sunday morning, there was a knock at their front door. A postal worker (yes, from the Post Office...yes, that Post Office) handed him an envelope. Inside was a new set of cards from the bank.
My original surprise at the number of times their account was compromised was replaced by my surprise at the speed and efficiency exhibited by the issuing bank. Wow, a three day turnaround on new cards? And hand-delivered on a weekend? On a Sunday?
After lunch was over, I checked my messages on my iPhone and saw that some of my apps were due for an update. I noticed one app that I'd updated only a few short days ago. Between that and my friend's "four card monte", I started really thinking about where technology is taking us: toward a hot swappable life.
If you're not familiar with the idea of "Hot Swappable" hardware, think about a USB device. You don't have to unplug or power down your computer to plug in a USB device; you can use it while the computer's still running. Expand that notion to your phone. Your apps don't need the phone to be powered down to upgrade; sometimes, you don't even have to close the app that's being upgraded.
Bringing those concepts to finance is very interesting to me. Each year, the time between your purchase and the debit being reflected on your account gets shorter and shorter. Card companies are looking to implement Chip-and-PIN as soon as October of next year to improve security. User-to-user money exchanges are becoming more prominent. People are starting to understand the value of data backups.
Your phone gets dropped in a toilet? No worries - just download the contents again from your online account. Your computer gets fried in a lightning storm? Piece of cake - get a new computer and backup from an external disk. Your card information gets compromised? Don't worry, we'll get you some new cards right away. Heck, in another few years, we won't bother mailing new cards. The number will change electronically, instantly.
"Don't slow down. Don't even stop. Keep moving, we'll come through." It's a lofty promise, but I think it's where we're heading. Can you bring that same level of consistency to your members?
Better start thinking about how you can make it happen.


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If the recent announcement from the federal government that eating almonds, walnuts and pistachios may reduce the risk of heart disease has the same impact on California-grown tree nuts as the French Paradox had on red wine consumption, there may not be enough trees in California to meet demand.
That's what the California wine industry thought after a 1991 "60 Minutes" broadcast that attributed France's low rate of heart disease to red wine consumption.
And, we all know what has happened to California's wine industry. Consumption increased but not as rapidly as new plantings. The industry eventually descended into one of its deepest economic troughs ever because of an oversupply of wine grapes.
In July, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved a much-awaited qualified health claim for nuts and heart disease prevention for immediate use on food labels in response to a petition filed by the International Tree Nut Council's Nutrition Research and Education Foundation.
It is easy to draw a parallel between the FDA announcement and the French Paradox, but that may be where the similarity ends. For one thing, California almonds, walnut and pistachio producers are a bit more prosperous than the wine grape industry was when the French Paradox exploded wine awareness.
Phenomenal growth
For one thing, the king of the California nut crops, almonds, are enjoying an phenomenal growth in not only production but consumption as well.
Dan Cummings, a Chico, Calif., almond grower and former vice chairman of the Almond Board of California, told the recent 22nd annual Agribusiness Management Conference in Fresno, Calif., that the industry shrugged off back-to-back one billion pound crops with four years of record shipments and a 55 percent improvement in grower field prices in that same period.
"Years of fretting over the impending one billion pound crop after record new plantings in the mid to late '90s were cast aside" by incredible increases in almond shipments.
Almonds are now California's largest agricultural export with more than 80 percent of the world's supply produced in the Golden State. Seventy percent of the state's crop is exported.
Changing production practices — more trees per acre, improved irrigation technology and variety selection — have reduced production volatility and assured the marketplace a constant, large supply almonds.
Primary production areas continue to shift west to south. Almost half of the state's almond production is south of Madera, Calif., where bloom time weather in late February is more favorable for pollination.
Bearing acreage should remain relatively constant at 530,000 acres of trees for the next few years, said Cummings, as trees planted in the last three years offset aging acreage being pulled out.
However, most commercial nurseries are sold out for 2004 and 2005 plantings at numbers comparable to the mid-1990s. This translates to a surge in plantings on the order of 35,000 acres per year.
"This means another surge of plantings on the order of 35,000 acres per year," he said.
The industry has seen a compounded growth rate of 9.2 percent annually over the last five years and there are no signs of it slowing down. Cummings predicts California will remain the dominant global producer.
Almond prices "should be profitable over the next few years," Cummings predicts. However, new plantings will put downward pressure on prices and planting will slow.
California walnut growers will produce a record crop this season, 315,000 tons, 3.3 percent greater than the 305,000 tons produced in 2001, according to Cummings.
California is the world's second largest walnut producer (36 percent) behind China with 44 percent.
Over the last decade, Cummings said there has been a dramatic decrease in early harvesting varieties like Ashley and Payne that can be directed to the in-shell market.
California walnuts are sold 25 percent in-shell and 70 to 75 percent shelled walnut meats. Eighty percent of in-shell production is exported, primarily to Europe.
New premium shelling varieties coupled with improved technology to remove walnut meats has lead to increased ingredient sales and shipments to foreign markets.
In the last 10 years, almost 82 percent of the new acres have been to Chandler, Howard and Tulare varieties. These are quick to mature, produce large crops of high quality and are considered the premium, shelling varieties due to their high meat yields.
"Walnuts are moving beyond the traditional bakery segment and into such diverse categories as cereal, ice cream and snack foods," said Cummings.
This is opening up export markets. Japan has historically been a non-user of walnuts, but Cumming said Japan has become the largest importer of California walnuts. They are used in "everything from traditional dishes to high-end bakery products in the finest European tradition."
Cummings predicts only a modest increase in acreage in 2004 from the 205,000 bearing acres this season. However, Cummings expects total production to increase for several years with the shift in varieties.
Prices are in the 50-cents per pound range and will likely remain there for in-shell walnuts. Chandler prices have leveled off to the 60-65 cents range. Serr, Howard and Tulare premium shelling varieties are in the mid to upper 50-cent range with the balance of shelling stock selling for 40 to 50 cents per pound.
"Increasing grower revenues will be primarily accomplished by higher yields per acres, and younger orchards with the newer varieties will enjoy a substantial advance over much of California's older, established walnut orchards," Cummings predicted.
This is an off year for pistachio production. The California Agricultural Statistical Service is projected a 180 million pound crop with 80 percent of that open shell.
However, growers are questioning that estimate because of insect damage.
That compares to last year's record of 302 million pounds.
Pistachio acreage now totals 111,000 acres with 23,000 non-bearing.
So far demand has kept up with production, thanks to the efforts to balance supplies between off and on production seasons and aggressive promotion efforts. This has stabilized grower returns as crop size more than doubled between 1991 and 2002.
e-mail: [email protected]


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All about experience
Trip to Lincoln gives Eagle girls something to build on for future years.
LINCOLN—From the minute the Brady girls climbed on the yellow school bus last Wednesday morning until the trip was complete when they rolled back into town Friday evening, there was nothing but smiles all around.
"Sure it stinks to lose," said coach Darren Tobey of Brady's 59-30 loss to Silver Lake in the first round of the Class D-1 state tournament. "But this is about more than one basketball game. It's all about the complete experience."
Rooming together in a motel, eating supper at a nice restaraunt, watching the Husker women play and making all sorts of life-long memories—that's what it's all about.
"But we also learned some things about basketball," Tobey said. "I know the coaches realized a lot of things we need to improve and I think the girls understand there's a next level."
The girls may have been a little awe-struck when they stepped on the court at Lincoln North Star High School, the coach said, but it wasn't the gym that took the girls out of their comfort zone.
"We made it to state playing the same style week after week and then we get down there and I changed things up," Tobey said. "Believe me, I've been kicking myself ever since."
To slow down Silver Lake's running game, Tobey switched his girls from their comfortable man-to-man defense to a zone.
"We're not comfortable playing slow," he said, "and it backfired."
After being tied 3-3 in the first two minutes of the game, Silver Lake caught fire and never looked back.
The Mustangs went on a 10-0 run in the first period and finished the quarter with a 19-7 lead.
The first half wasn't all Mustang domination, though. Brady struggled to hit a shot.
"If we could have made a few free throws and a couple of those bunny shots in the first half, we could have stayed right in the game," Tobey said.
As it was, Silver Lake carried a 31-15 advantage into halftime.
"We were able to make a little run to start the third period and then (Silver Lake) took off again," Tobey said.
A 12-0 spurt by the Mustangs put the score out of reach for Brady midway through the third quarter.
Sophomore Megan Polt led the Eagles with 15 points.
What Tobey hopes the girls come away with is a passion to return, next time with a bigger goal in mind.
"We have a lot of experienced underclassmen coming back," he said. "We graduate three seniors and gain a handful of talented eighth-graders."
The biggest thing Tobey hopes those returning players saw while in Lincoln is what it will take to be successful again next year.
"We watched solid ball handling, consistent shooting and in-your-face defense," he said. "We know we're going to have to play more physical."
The Eagles finish the year with a 13-10 record. They also recieved the honor of a No. 9 state ranking in Class D-1 by the Lincoln Journal Star and a No. 10 rating in the class from the Omaha World-Herald.
"I hope that gives them a taste of what it's like and they'll work hard to get back there next year," Tobey said.
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Romney, Santorum attack each other on spending recordsBy STEVEN THOMMA and DAVID LIGHTMAN
McClatchy Newspapers
February 22. 2012 10:15PM
MESA, Ariz. - Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum clashed over which of them is the true conservative steward of taxpayers' money as they grappled for advantage Wednesday night in a two-man grudge match heading toward critical votes in Arizona and Michigan on Tuesday.
In a nationally televised debate on CNN, each Republican presidential candidate cast himself as someone who would cut spending and slash a bloated federal government. Each also accused the other of a record of wasteful spending in the past.
Santorum, a senator from Pennsylvania from 1995 to 2007, frequently was put on the defensive about his voting record. He took fire for seeking earmarks, or local projects that congressional lawmakers insert into spending bills.
Santorum gave a lengthy, sometimes confusing explanation. He talked about 'good earmarks and bad earmarks,' and said some projects were much needed in his state. And he noted that when Romney was rescuing the 2002 Salt Lake City Olympics, he sought earmarks to help finance the event.
Romney fired back: 'While I was fighting to save the Olympics, you were fighting to save the Bridge to Nowhere,' a reference to a controversial Alaska bridge funded by an earmark that Santorum voted for.
Rep. Ron Paul of Texas jumped in as well, slamming Santorum for calling himself a fiscal conservative.
'He's a fake,' Paul said, citing Santorum's vote for the No Child Left Behind education act and now campaigning to repeal it.
It was the last debate - and last chance to shake up the race - before Tuesday's primaries in Arizona and Michigan and then in 10 states on March 6, 'Super Tuesday.'
Romney is locked in a neck-and-neck contest with Santorum in Michigan, with Santorum supported by 33.8 percent of likely voters and Romney supported by 33 percent, according to an average of public polls compiled by realclearpolitics.com.
A loss in Michigan would be embarrassing at the least for Romney, whose late father headed a Detroit-based auto company and was a popular Michigan governor in the 1960s.
Romney, governor of Massachusetts from 2003 to 2007, leads Santorum in Arizona by an average of 8 percentage points in polls.
Santorum tore into Romney for supporting Wall Street bailouts in 2008, but opposing aid to the auto industry.
'That to me is not a consistent, principled position,' Santorum said.
'Nice try,' Romney fired back, 'now lets look at the facts.' He said that he didn't favor bailing out any Wall Street bank, but the issue was avoiding the loss of 'all our banks.'
As for opposing auto bailouts, he said the better answer was a 'managed bankruptcy' that would have saved U.S. firms from costly auto-union costs that the bailouts didn't end.
Romney criticized Santorum's record in Congress, saying he had voted to raise the debt ceiling five times without demanding spending cuts in return and watching as federal spending grew by 80 percent.
Santorum said that federal spending actually shrank during his time in Congress when measured as a share of the overall economy. He also said that he had a more conservative voting record on budget issues than 50 other Republican senators.
'I was the most fiscally conservative senator in the years I was there,' Santorum said.
'That's a cop-out, ranking yourself against other members of Congress,' said Paul. 'The American people are sick and tired of Congress.'
Contraception also sparked tense debate. Santorum says that he's 'not a believer' in birth control. He defended that view passionately Wednesday, insisting that family and religious values need to be re-emphasized. Too many children are born into single-parent families, a sure path to poverty, he said.
There was general agreement on foreign policy - except for Paul.
Romney, Santorum and former Speaker of the House of Representatives Newt Gingrich blasted President Barack Obama as too soft on Iran and Syria. But Paul insisted that the U.S. appears too eager to take military action.
Santorum said Syria was an Iranian 'puppet state' and implied that regime change was needed, though he stopped short of saying what he would do.
Romney also avoided backing American military action in Syria, saying other countries in the region should provide military aid to Syrian rebels. But he insisted that he would not permit Iran to have nuclear weapons, as did Gingrich.
Paul said the U.S. has no firm evidence that Iran has a nuclear weapon and that U.S. threats were encouraging Iran to pursue one 'because they feel threatened.' He insisted that the U.S. cannot afford more wars.
Asked to describe themselves in a single word, Paul said 'consistent,' Santorum said 'courage,' Romney said 'resolute,' and Gingrich said 'cheerful.'
For Gingrich, the debate was a chance to get back into the game after losing every contest since South Carolina on Jan. 21 and fading from sight. He used the spotlight to push an energy agenda that he said would cut gas prices to $2.50 a gallon and repeatedly insisted that only he could bring the sweeping fundamental change to Washington that the nation needs.


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Message Board
Tony Broadbent Message Board
Talk about the novels, new and used books that Broadbent has written!
Author Broadbent's Book Reviews
The Smoke
Dunne, Sep 2002, 23.95, 320 pp. ISBN: 0312290276 After serving in the Merchant Navy, former creeper (cat burglar) Jethro insists he has gone straight using the skills he learned during World War II to earn a living as a stagehand in London's West End theatres. No one who knows Jethro from before the war believes he can resist the lure of a caper. Several of his underground cronies have even tried to enlist Jethro's help on jobs. Jethro seren...


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Sales Consultant
Harveys, the UK's biggest specialist furniture retailer has an exciting opportunity for an engaging and dynamic Sales Consultant within our Coventry store. Using your outgoing personality and drive you can earn realistic and achievable OTE of £26,000 plus the opportunity to develop a rewarding career within our thriving and growing business.
Our Sales Consultants play an integral part of the stores success by contributing and meetings annual sales and profit targets. We strive to inspire our customers with intelligent styling and design to their furniture for their busy home lives. You will become our brand ambassador and deliver a friendly and consultative sales experience ensuring your customers are satisfied each and every time. Selling is an important aspect of the Sales Consultant role therefore to succeed you must be prepared to be accountable for your results.
Since opening our first store in 1966 we have grown to a portfolio of over 150 stores nationwide. We are now part of the Steinhoff group which is one of the world's largest manufacturers and retailers of household goods and furniture that employs 90,000 people across the globe and provides us with the backing and infrastructure of a huge global furniture retailer.
Our strong team of Sales Consultants are responsible for the following:
- Demonstrate strong customer service ensuring your customers feel welcome
- Confidently approach and build rapport with your customers to identify their needs
- Provide expert advice and assist in helping customers make informed decisions about which furniture is right for them
- Achieving personal sales targets
- Meet KPI's to monitor and develop personal performance
- Maintain strong product knowledge to appropriately advise customers about their extensive product range
- Supporting with merchandising, store standards and POS
We are looking for Sales Consultants who are passionate about people and delivering excellent service, strong communicators and have the ability to build rapport quickly. It is essential you have an outgoing personality, are hardworking, driven and results orientated. You must be prepared to work evenings and weekends. Previous experience within a similar sales role would be desirable but not essential.
What can we offer you?
We believe our employees are the driving force behind our success and therefore as our Sales Consultant you will be rewarded with a basic salary plus you will earn a percentage of every sale as well as a monthly store bonus allowing you to earn £26,000 OTE. We also offer a generous staff discount scheme, childcare vouchers and up to 31 days holiday.
With specialised product and management training from our Learning and Development team, we are confident that not only will you become a furniture expert but also one of our future leaders in no time.
To become our next Sales Consultant then click apply today and don't miss out on this excellent opportunity.


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Enough already
It used to be that liberals were known as the tax-and-spend crowd. Now they are the tax, borrow and spend group, as a federal budget proposal unveiled Monday makes plain.
Americans pay too much in taxes. As a nation we are too deep in debt, at $17 trillion and counting. Yet liberals in the House of Representatives want to keep up the bad work.
U.S. Rep. Chris Van Hollen, D-Md., released the liberal plan. It calls for $1.5 trillion in new tax revenue during the next 10 years. It projects a $600 billion annual deficit by 2024.
Even to get the numbers to that point, Van Hollen had to employ some sleight of hand. Part of the expected new revenue is $500 billion he is counting on from new immigrant workers. Don't count on that. Instead, reflect that similar liberal pledges in the past have had to be redeemed through higher taxes on the middle class.
Van Hollen's blueprint was hammered out in response to a budget plan from U.S. Rep. Paul Ryan, R-Wis. It relies on $5 trillion in spending cuts to balance the budget within a decade.
Ryan's proposal also calls for repealing Obamacare, and thus saving tens of millions of families money the president's signature law will suck out of our pockets.
Fortunately, Republican control of the House means Van Hollen's package has no chance of being enacted. He and fellow liberals would have done better not to demonstrate once again to voters that their priorities are far out of line with those of most Americans.
Still, they have done the public a service, if only by reminding us of the need for voters to wrest control of the Senate from Democrats this fall.


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Just want to ask people that have been to RS and seen the thread if I'm being civil or not. Just want to make sure and see what people think of what I'm saying. I will take in comments bad or good, hopefully good.
I think at last count, it was like 23 regulars.
I just signed up with this place about 2 minutes ago and I see no difference in this place and rebelscum , but I guess I will be a commoner here too .
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PINE BLUFF An adult and a child died Friday in a fire that destroyed a house in Pine Bluff.
Pine Bluff Fire Department Lt. Harold Clark said the two-story residential structure at Fifth Avenue and Poplar Street was fully engulfed when crews arrived a little after 7 a.m.
Firefighters extinguished the flames and later found the body of an adult and a child in the wreckage. Their names have not been released.
"Our hearts and prayers go out to the family at this time," Clark said.
Battalion Chief Scott Moore, who was the first to arrive at the scene, said crews had to fight the blaze from outside the structure because of how much the fire had spread.
Moore said the department has asked the Arkansas State Fire Marshal's Office for assistance with the investigation, including possibly bringing in K9s to sniff for accelerants. He said there is no preliminary indication of anything suspicious.
The fire appears to have started at the back of the large house, which had been divided up into apartments, Moore said.
By midday Friday, only a pile of smoldering rubble remained on the lot.
"It's always devastating," Moore said of the double-fatality fire. "I've been on the job 28 years plus and it doesn't get any easier."


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County officials looking to expand have had to put biodiesel production on hold because of a legislative snag.
The aroma of fried food that wafts on the breeze at a section of the Alachua County Hazardous Waste Collection Center doesn't come from someone's lunch.
It's a hard-to-ignore indicator of how the county is addressing an environmental problem while saving the taxpayers money. It is the smell of used cooking oil that is being turned into biodiesel fuel.
Since 2010, the county has been collecting waste vegetable oil from residents and businesses and using it to make biodiesel, which is then blended with regular diesel to power some county vehicles.
Even the generator powering the household waste collection area where the used oil is collected runs on biodiesel.
This has helped the county environmentally and financially, said Chris Bird, director of the Alachua County Environmental Protection Department.
"It can't fuel the entire county fleet, but it does cut down on how much (regular diesel) we need to buy," he said.
But now, county officials looking to expand the operation have had to put biodiesel production on hold because of a legislative snag.
In order to produce even small amounts for internal use, Florida requires a county to be licensed as a fuel wholesaler, which means the county has to keep a complex inventory of the fuel among other requirements, said Mark Sexton, communications coordinator for Alachua County.
Although local governments are exempt from some fuel taxes, Alachua County must pay them anyway and get a refund later.
"It's a heavy bureaucratic burden," Sexton said.
The law requiring the county to maintain a license as a fuel wholesaler has been on the books for well over a decade and the county knew of the requirement when it started converting leftover oil into biodiesel back in 2010. But the county has since decided the bureaucratic requirements outweigh the benefits and thus it stopped producing biodiesel in December 2012.
Two area legislators have recently filed bills in Tallahassee seeking to fix the problems.
"I think (use of biodiesel is) a good, common-sense approach," said state Sen. Rob Bradley, R-Fleming Island. "It's a win-win for the taxpayers, for the environment, for everyone involved."
The potential value of biodiesel was made evident to county officials almost a decade ago when a number of hurricanes ripped across the state, causing havoc to fuel supplies.
"In 2004, the county never ran out of fuel," Bird said, "but we became concerned when shipping lanes and oil terminals got disrupted."
Having biodiesel to supplement the supply means that the county can use its diesel stocks more sparingly to run its emergency generators and vehicles.
The county also has seen an environmental benefit. When homeowners or restaurants improperly dispose of used cooking oil by pouring it down the drain, it solidifies and clogs wastewater collection lines, which can cause sewage spills, Bird said.
"We've had problems with local creeks that have ended up with raw sewage in them" as a result of oil hardening in the lines, he said.
With grants from the Florida Department of Environmental Protection and the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, the county set up waste oil drop-off stations at its five Rural Solid Waste Collection Centers and at the Alachua County Hazardous Waste Collection Center.
Emiliano's and Manuel's restaurants downtown are major contributors of used vegetable oil, Bird said. Last year, the county also collected a lot of waste oil from the Hoggetowne Medieval Faire.
Bird estimates the county produced about 200 gallons of biodiesel each month last year, but officials have had to suspend production because of the problem with the state rules.
Other counties in Florida, including St. Johns, and cities such as Tallahassee and Panama City have similar programs and are facing the same challenge.
Alachua County Environmental Protection Department officials are working with the Florida Department of Revenue on proposed changes.
The bills would eliminate the fuel wholesaler requirement for counties, municipal governments and school districts that want to produce fuel for internal use. They streamline the processes for refunds and tax-filing.
The Florida DOR agreed it would not affect the revenue the state receives from the county, Bird said. It's all about the paperwork, Sexton said.
The County Commission has ranked changing the biodiesel legislation as one of its top five priorities for this year, Sexton said. The legislation will save the county time and manpower, freeing up resources and saving money.
Bradley has filed a bill in the Senate and state Rep. Keith Perry, R-Gainesville, submitted a companion bill to the House's drafting staff last week. Perry said it will help counties, municipalities and school districts create better technology for alternative fuels.
"I think they'll come up with better ways to make a cleaner, more efficient end product," he said.


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Share A Joke
14-09-2010, 01:33 AM (This post was last modified: 14-09-2010 01:41 AM by sosa.)
RE: The joke Thread
A guy is headed downtown and is late for a job interview. He is desperate to find a parking place, and so he rolls down his window and shouts to god, "If you find me a parking place, I promise I'll never touch another drop of liquor."
Just then, a car pulls out, leaving a parking place right in front of his building.
He leans out and shouts to god, "Never mind, I found one myself."
It's 3:00 AM in the Vatican when the phone rings in the papal apartments. The pope's personal secretary answers, looks startled, then wakes up the pope and hands him the phone. The pope immediately recognizes the voice at the other end of the line as that of God.
"Hello Benedict! It's good to talk to you." Booms the voice of the almighty.
"It is certainly good to talk to you my lord" Says the pope.
"Well Ben, I am calling you to give you two pieces of news; a piece of good news and and a piece of bad news. Which would you like to hear first?" Says the lord of hosts.
After a second's hesitation his holiness says. "Well, my lord I suppose I should hear the good news first."
Yahweh immediately answers. "I have decided to do away with all the schisms and splintering of my church and bring everyone together into one big church."
Benedict is beside himself with joy. "Oh lord! This is what I have dreamed about all my life. If this is true then I can take any bad news! Give it to me now."
Jehovah hesitates and clears his throat. "Well Benedict, you see I'm calling from Salt Lake City."
An athiest sees two christians arguing in the street, so he walks over and asks what all the fuss is about. One of the christians explains that they're trying to decide how much of their money they should give to the church.
Christian 1: I think we should draw a circle on the ground, throw all our money in the air and whatever lands in the circle, we'll give to the lord.
Christian 2: And I think we should draw a circle on the ground, throw all our money in the air and whatever lands outside the circle, we should give to the lord.
The Athiest: Why don't you just throw all your money in the air, and whatever god wants, he can keep.
An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. As he was walking alongside a powerful river he heard a loud rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a seven foot grizzly bear charge toward him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but the bear was now on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.
The atheist cried out: "Oh God!" Immediately time stopped and the bear froze, and a voice came out of the sky: "You deny my existence all these years, teach others I don't exist, even credit what I created and made to cosmic accident. And now you cry out to me, expect me to help you out of this predicament?"
The atheist said: "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian believer now, but perhaps you could grant me a wish: make the bear a Christian instead". "Very well", said the skyward voice.
The bear dropped his right paw about to strike, brought both paws together, bowed his head to the ground, and spoke these words: "Lord, Bless this food I am about to eat..."
What do you call a German Shepherd in a $10,000 hat?
The Pope.
During the Reign of Terror of the French Revolution, one morning's executions began with three men: a rabbi, a Catholic priest, and a rationalist skeptic.
The rabbi was marched up onto the platform first. There, facing the guillotine, he was asked if he had any last words. And the rabbi cried out, "I believe in the one and only true God, and He shall save me." The executioner then positioned the rabbi below the blade, set the block above his neck, and pulled the cord to set the terrible instrument in motion. The heavy cleaver plunged downward, searing the air. But then, abruptly, it stopped with a crack just a few inches above the would-be victim's neck. To which the rabbi said, "I told you so."
"It's a miracle!" gasped the crowd. And the executioner had to agree, letting the rabbi go.
Next in line was the priest. Asked for his final words, he declared, "I believe in Jesus Christ the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost who will rescue me in my hour of need." The executioner then positioned this man beneath the blade. And he pulled the cord. Again the blade flew downward thump! creak! ...stopping just short of its mark once more.
"Another miracle!" sighed the disappointed crowd. And the executioner for the second time had no choice but to let the condemned go free.
Now it was the skeptic's turn. "What final words have you to say?" he was asked. But the skeptic didn't hear. Staring intently at the ominous engine of death, he seemed lost. Not until the executioner poked him in the ribs and the question was asked again did he reply.
"Oh, I see your problem," the skeptic said pointing. "You've got a blockage in the gear assembly, right there!"
Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together. The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a Bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace'."
The third Catholic woman says smugly, "My son is a Cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Eminence'."
The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her this subtle "Well.....?"
She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6'2", hard bodied stripper. When he walks into a room, people say, 'Oh my God...'."
The head priest at a certain church was out for the day, so he asked the deacon to do confession for him. The deacon agrees, and the first person that comes says, "Forgive me, for I just gave a guy a blow job."
He says, "You have sinned." Then he looks at the sheet on the wall that had punishments for certain sins on it, but blow job was not on there, so he went out to ask one of the altar boys what he usually gives for a blow job.
The altar boy answered, "Oh, about five dollars."
The priest in a small village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house out behind the parish manse. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens.
Well, one Saturday night, the cock rooster was missing, and because the priest had heard that cock fights occurred in the village, he decided to question his parishioners about it at church the next morning.
At Mass, he asked the congregation, "Who's got a cock?"
All the men stood up.
"No, No," he said, "That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?"
All the women stood up.
"No, No," he said, "That wasn't what I meant either. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?"
Half the women stood up.
"No, No," he said, "I meant: Has anybody seen MY cock?"
Up stood five nuns, three altar boys, and two priests…
The following 7 users Like sosa's post:7 users Like sosa's post
craniumonempty (07-03-2012),
RE: The joke Thread
Quoting Christopher Hitchens:
"What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness with a Unitarian?"
-Someone who knocks on your door for no reason.
"Remember, my friend, that knowledge is stronger than memory, and we should not trust the weaker." - Dr. Van Helsing, Dracula
The following 2 users Like SecularStudent's post:2 users Like SecularStudent's post
RE: The joke Thread
(04-09-2010 06:59 AM)BnW Wrote: A priest and a rabbi are standing on a street corner talking when a 10 year old boy walks by. The priest says "hey rabbi, we should grab that boy, pull him into the alley and screw him". The rabbi looks perplexed and says "out of what?".That just went on my Facebook.
A rabbi and a priest get into a car accident and it's a bad one. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither are hurt. They crawl out of their cars and the rabbi sees the priest's collar and says, "So you're a priest. I'm a rabbi. Just look at our cars. There's nothing left but we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God. God must have meant that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days." And the priest said, "I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God."
And the rabbi said, "and look at this. Here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of Mogen David wine didn't break, surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune. And so he handed the bottle to the priest. The priest said he agreed, took a few big swigs, and handed the bottle back to the rabbi. The rabbi took the bottle, didn't drink at all, put the cap on, and handed it back to the priest. The priest asked, "aren't you going to have any?" And the rabbi replied, "No . . . I think I'll just wait for the police."
"Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family."
-Stephen Colbert
The following 2 users Like jkshrout's post:2 users Like jkshrout's post
Birdguy1979 (19-01-2013), horseloveridge (19-07-2013)
RE: The joke Thread
my joke:
atheists do have church, its called science class
The following 1 user Likes thecajunathiest's post:1 user Likes thecajunathiest's post
ScrumTheMailBox (28-12-2013)
RE: The joke Thread
Swedish vs. english (the 'poems' are the same).
Island island,
grassy island
grassy islands lady.
Ö ö,
hö ö
hö ös mö.
The following 1 user Likes Kikko's post:1 user Likes Kikko's post
ScrumTheMailBox (28-12-2013)
RE: The joke Thread
Message of the year:-
Women live a better, longer & peaceful life..!!
Why? Very simple…
A woman does not have a wife..!!!
The following 1 user Likes Naters's post:1 user Likes Naters's post
ScrumTheMailBox (28-12-2013)
RE: The joke Thread
(27-10-2010 05:00 AM)Naters Wrote: Message of the year:-
This is now politically wrong because some women have wives and to deny that is unconstitutional, and would put you in cahoots with the fundies. Wait a minute, I think I just contradicted myself.
RE: The joke Thread
Sorry Naters. I hope I didn't ruin your joke. I was just trying to create humor based on other humor, which is common practice with me and my friends. It is harder to do on line because of lack of nuance and body language. I hope I didn't blow it too badly.
RE: The joke Thread
(31-10-2010 05:15 PM)No J. Wrote: Sorry Naters. I hope I didn't ruin your joke. I was just trying to create humor based on other humor, which is common practice with me and my friends. It is harder to do on line because of lack of nuance and body language. I hope I didn't blow it too badly.It wasn't the delivery that blew the joke, it was you apologizing for it.
"Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family."
-Stephen Colbert
The following 1 user Likes jkshrout's post:1 user Likes jkshrout's post
horseloveridge (19-07-2013)
RE: The joke Thread
OK. I apologize for apologizing for my apology of the joke.
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horseloveridge (19-07-2013)
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