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tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25488846431503979122018-09-21T03:54:40.394-05:00Queen of the Universe- No Credentials NeededSome things make sense in the world. A lot more don't. Putting it into words sometimes helps me make sense of the senseless. Although more often, it just amplifies the stupid.lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-1190165018904513002018-09-08T18:24:00.000-05:002018-09-08T18:24:43.787-05:00He Started it...But I'm Ending ItThe mantis in the guinea pig barn is dead. That's a fact.

All has been peaceful in the guinea pig barn.

Day before yesterday, I needed something off of the screened porch, so I opened the door from the dining room and went out there. As I closed the door behind me, I noticed THE MANTIS ON THE DOORKNOB. I grabbed what I needed, and when the mantis flew up onto the door window, I ducked into the house.

Yesterday morning, I again needed something from the porch.

I looked carefully through the window, inspecting every surface in sight. No mantis.

I opened the door slowly...no mantis on the knob. Before I went back into the house, I checked the entire surface of the door...nothing.

With a sigh of relief, I went into the house, closing the door behind me, glanced up and saw THE MANTIS ON THE INSIDE OF THE DOOR.

The little bastard had been on the porch-side of the door and when I opened the door, he'd SLID AROUND THE GAP WHERE THE HINGES ARE AND GAINED ENTRY TO MY HOME.

Mantis: "Heh, heh, heh. Now what are you gonna do, puny human?"

Me: *picks up fly swatter and terminates mantis*

This is War. No Prisoners.

PS- the wolf spiders in the bathroom have never done me this way. They're civilized bugs.

Asshole Mantids.lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-57549780795347895842018-09-05T20:52:00.000-05:002018-09-05T20:52:58.511-05:00He Started It...Part TwoWhen we went into the barn this morning, we were greeted with a pitiful sight.

Lying in the middle of the floor, upside down, little boxing gloves in the air, was the dead mantis. It looked...odd and dry, but it's, yanno...a bug.

Gomez picked it up and tossed it outside.

The end.

At work, one of my co-workers posted a photo of many mantids on a hand on my Facebook and said, "His friends are gathering and coming to get you." Another co-worker saw the photo (the one who had fed my farm Monday morning, it so happened) looked aghast and said, "Oh, fuck no. Let me tell you what happened to me at Sheri's place!"

I was not Rabid Mantid's first victim.

She had been feeding the guinea pigs and had gotten to the same spot I'd been attacked, except she had seen no mantis. Suddenly, he appeared ON THE FRONT OF HER GLASSES, his tiny but fierce front feet waving menacingly. She flung her glasses off, rendering her pretty much blind, so she couldn't see if the mantis had gone with them. Cussing up a storm, she frantically pulled at her hair to be sure he wasn't lodged there.

She didn't see him again, but finished up the chores with alacrity.

So he was a repeat offender as far as aggressive behavior. I was happy he was dead.

Tonight, I was feeding the guinea pigs and got to...that same spot in the barn. I looked down and THERE WAS THE MANTIS PERCHED ON THE TOP OF THE CAGE, WAVING HIS TINY BUT FIERCE FRONT FEET AT ME.

What the hell?

In a flash, it all became clear. He'd spent all night constructing the faux mantis corpse out of stray bits of bedding and hay to lull me into a false sense of security.

Luckily, Gomez came into the barn just then, saw me frozen in terror, followed my horrified gaze, and was able to snatch the little asshole up while it was plotting my imminent demise.

I'd like to say he killed it, but his default is to catch and release, so out the door he tossed it.

If you don't hear from me again, you will know.

The mantis prevailed.

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-67717958882286070122018-09-04T23:12:00.000-05:002018-09-04T23:12:43.605-05:00He Started ItI'm normally a fan of mantids.

I mean, they eat their weight in other bugs every day and I've seen one hold four cats at bay just using chutzpah. I admit, I was initially horrified to realize that they can fly, but in general...a fan.

So, when I came on one in the guinea pig barn this morning, I was a little startled (because he blended right in with the grid-pattern of the cages) but overall I thought, "Cool."

I gently guided him out of my way as I did chores in the room; watering, cleaning cages, feeding...during the cleaning phase, there was a moment when he was perched facing me, waving his tiny-but-fierce little mantis arms at me and I (still gently) swept him off of the board he was on and out of pouncing distance. He reappeared at the top of a cage while I was feeding.

I carefully worked around him and then turned to the other side of the room. I was halfway down the line when I felt something hit the side of my head and before that could register, it started BITING ME. I smacked the side of my head and the little asshole mantis dropped down to my arm STILL BITING. I shook him off my arm and proceeded posthaste to the house to summon Gomez to offer him as a sacrifice  have him valiantly save me from the evil little aggressive bastard.

Of course, when we got back to the barn, the bug had moved. Gomez said, "Guess it's gone" and I said, "No. You stay here. It's watching us. I can feel it." A few minutes later, I spied the insect-demon and told Gomez, "Get it out of here."

The barn is not well-lit and Gomez has just the one eye which messes with depth perception, so he missed it and it flew down to the floor. I said, "Just step on it!" and he tried, but they are fast little shits, so it skittered away.

Gomez (thinking no doubt of his cup of coffee waiting for him on his desk) said briskly, "Well? You feel safe now?"

NO. NO, I DO NOT. YOU JUST PISSED IT OFF EVEN MORE AND IT'S SOMEWHERE NEAR THE FEED BAGS WHERE I WILL BE STICKING MY HANDS SO YOU ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, MISTER.

The mantis did not re-appear and I finished feeding in peace.

Tonight, we didn't see it at first. Gomez posited that the pigs ate it. Yes. My herbivore pigs ate one of the most carnivorous creatures ever to come down the evolutionary pike. We spotted it at last, and again it evaded capture.

Tomorrow morning, Gomez will be with me when I go feed. If he wants coffee, it'll be on the other side of an executed/evicted mantis.

Because that's what husbands are for.

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-46719057142739110722018-07-09T17:00:00.000-05:002018-07-09T17:00:04.846-05:00And Miles to go Before We SleepExhausting.

It's exhausting being a compassionate, thinking, left-of-liberal American right now.

The 2016 election plunged us off of the Cliffs of Despair and every time we think we've hit the bottom; every time our current administration and its maniacal followers do something that we think is surely the worst they have to throw at us and the rest of the world...we just keep falling.

It's bottomless and constant and exhausting.

It's not about "Hillary losing". It was never about Hillary losing. It's about what "won". Not just "who" won. It's the decimation of the moral compass of the soul of our nation in the form of hatred and cruelty and ignorance that's absolutely dazzling...wrapped up in a package filled with excrement and vomit and labeled "patriotism with an extra-large side of Jesus" even though Jesus would be horrified at its contents.

Being here, behind the Pine Curtain; a historically regressive enclave even inside the merging intersections of "Old South" and "Texas", it's palpable and stench-filled. This clawing, gnawing, snarling vortex that has been so threatened and aghast at anything progressive at all that's happened in our nation in the last...100 years.

Civil Rights
Women's Rights
Any type of "socialistic-leaning big-government program"

They want to repeal all of it. All of it.
And they're giddy with the scent of blood; they can see it within their grasp.

Racists are emboldened and violence is on the rise.
We can't even pretend to be a civilized nation anymore.
Oh, sure, most of us have flush toilets and clean bath water every day or so, and there's a Walmart and McDonald's on every corner, but most of us are one paycheck away from disaster...and falling.

Our children are getting shot in school on a weekly basis.
Our people are dying of preventable things for lack of access to healthcare.
We have the highest maternal mortality in the industrialized world.

And our current administration's idea of "fixing it" is to make everything better for those who already own most of the marbles. Less regulation, less taxes on corporations, blow it all open for "the private sector" to "do its magic". Trickle Down has been disproven for almost 40 years but *now* it's going to work? The only things they are willing to give to "the rest of us" are things that will not affect them one bit-
-a stupid wall to "keep out the illegals"
-repealing women's rights in the name of Jesus
-slashing "socialistic government programs"...that their base either already relies on or will rely on but because it's "socialism" it's got to go!

On a global scale, our nation is aligning itself with people our fathers and grandfathers DIED fighting. Dictators, Nazis (real actual ones), human rights' violators of all stripes, while shunning nations who have been our allies for generations.

So, I'm exhausted and I'm disgusted and many days I'm ready to, if not desert this festering febrile clinically-insane nation as a whole...at least uproot from this rotting regressive pocket of it. Shake the red dust of East Texas off of our shoes and head to the Pacific Northwest where people aren't so...awful. When we visited the Olympic Rainforest four years ago, I knew instantly. I knew that someday we'd move there and be able to relax mentally.

Don't get me wrong. Individual East Texans are wonderful, generous, caring people and I love quite a number of them after a quarter of a century here. But as a group? En masse? They keep re-electing Louie Gohmert. That's really all the clarification you need.

Why do we stay?

Our farm is here. Our log cabin that we build ourselves in the middle of the most perfect little East Texas Pineywoods forest you could imagine, with a hill and wetlands and two creeks and huge trees. That's a big thing. Home.

My job is here. I love it and it's important to the community of East Texas as well as the livelihood for now upwards of 20 people. So that's a big thing. I'm positioning a number of staff members to take the reins when I retire in 4 years so it can continue to grow and thrive.

Some days four years seems an eternity and I want to go *now*. Right now. Just...get the hell out of here before we suffocate in racism and incivility and MAGA hats and "Trump that Cunt" bumper stickers.

But.

We can't go yet. Because the next few years will be a long, drawn-out extension of what we're seeing happen now, we can't go yet. Even if we can. Even if we want to. We can't.

Because here's the thing. I'm a little old white lady who is reasonably middle-class and who is mostly fearless. There are a lot of people here in East Texas who are none of the above and no matter how inconvenienced I am by the steamroller of regression, the worst it will do to me is piss me off.

We need to stay because if we can help even one person who is marginalized, even one person who is affected negatively, even one person who will suffer at the hands of all this "making America great again", we have to do it.

We need to stay because someone who is white, and in a "management position", and looks like every other little old white lady in East Texas has to say, "NO. That's wrong. I do not agree with that and here's why..." Because otherwise, with no one opposing them, they will think it's right.

But some days it's a mighty weight. Some days I should be doing something productive and I just can't. Yesterday was one of those days. So I get on Trulia and browse...browse my "someday" and drink in the coolness of the rainforest on my computer screen; remembering the sight and sound of it from four years ago.

"The woods are lovely, dark and deep,

But I have promises to keep.

And miles to go before I sleep.

 And miles to go before I sleep."

6.5 acres on the west side of Lake Cushman. Lakefront. Insert log cabin *here*

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-4772302091886349262018-04-06T21:35:00.000-05:002018-04-06T21:35:08.350-05:00If the Shoe FitsYanno, in all the movies where the hero has cancer and he battles it valiantly with his loving family at his side and he beats it?

Not the one where he dies a heroic and beautiful meaningful death. Those suck.

The other one. The one where the doctor smiles and says, "Your scan came back negative. Have a nice life" and everyone hugs everyone while they cry and cry and cry and the movie fades out and the music plays thru the credits and you just know that they resume normal life and live happily ever after. That one.

I'd like to say that's how all cancer-beating stories end, but I'd be lying.

Because we were that family and continue to be that family every year when they scan his head and say, "Mr. Dixon, there is nothing of note in your head" and we all laugh and laugh and go home.

But.

What they didn't tell us was the other shoe that may drop.

That shoe that was me finding Ward's teeth around the house like some weird bizarro-world tooth fairy shit because they would just fall out of his mouth and he'd just...set it right here. Or there. Or over there. And the doctor said, "Oh, yeah. That radiation never stops working and it's now eating away his jaw. Let's do some major dental surgery and fit him with dentures so he doesn't break his own jaw chewing oatmeal."

That was a few years ago.

Or the shoe that was Ward fighting his way back from not knowing who I was or where we lived or how to read and who weighed a horrifying Auschwitz-like 130 pounds back in 2010 when he was in the hospital for 6 weeks and almost died. Fighting like hell mentally and physically so he made it back to about 90% of pre-surgery Ward. That shoe was a real bastard.

Or the shoe that was Ward starting to get a little fuzzy and forgetful in 2013 so we went back to the neurologist at MD Anderson and they did a brain scan and did cognitive testing and said, "There are some deficits. We believe they were caused by the radiation (that never stops working) and the hours and hours of general anesthetic he's undergone. It's not Alzheimers but it may progress the same and it'll look the same from the outside."

Well, he's "progressed" very little since then. It's been almost not noticeable and totally manageable since then.

Then yet another shoe, in the form of the pneumonia he came down with over Thanksgiving weekend this past fall. He almost died (he needs to stop doing that) and was rendered unconscious and on a ventilator for 3 days in ICU to keep him alive. He was hooked up to *twelve* IV pumps.

Well, that plumb flattened him out, physically and mentally.

Physically, he fought back again. Mentally, it was harder. It was a goddamned struggle and continues to be one.

The therapist locally did some very surface testing and said, "He needs to be under the care of a neurologist." So we went back to the one we had seen in 2013...since she had all his last results.

They re-did the scan and re-did the three hours of cognitive testing.

The doctor saw us today. There was no laughing. The additional 3 days of anesthetic and the physical insult of the pneumonia took a terrible toll.

While *most* of his mental functions are normal to above-normal, his memory is severely impaired; both short term and long term. His test results, as far as memory, are those of someone with "moderately severe Alzheimers".

The report from the PET scan says the changes in his brain, while problematic and definitely serious, aren't exactly typical of Alzheimers, and that they still think it was caused by all the shit he's been through, but he needs to be under the care of someone who does strictly dementia care- the neuro doctor at MD Anderson is used to looking at tumors and saying, "Yep. That's gotta go" and getting it gone.

She had tears in her eyes as she said, "I'd like to say we can help him here, but we are not set up for that. He needs someone who specializes in dementia. I'm sorry" and she handed us the contact information for Baylor and UT departments of neuro-dementia studies.

So...one more damn thing.

It's not right. My Knight in Shining Armor has been thru cancer, diabetes, heart attack, heart failure, AND he's married to me. Hasn't he suffered enough???

My family is sick to death of "the other shoe".

No wonder we all go barefoot 99% of the time.

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-51167502664575318422018-02-18T10:24:00.001-06:002018-07-09T17:23:17.501-05:00Where Did These Kids Come From?In the wake of the latest school shooting...there will be another one next week because now, in the US, that's how we roll...people (specifically conservative gun enthusiasts) are saying the FBI is at fault for a young man being able to walk into a school and shoot up students and teachers.

I know plenty of gun nuts who regularly spew hatred of Muslims and gays and black people and politicians and immigrants and liberals and even say...shoot at targets of actual people *cough* Obama *cough* and have upwards of 20 guns and literal tons of ammo, while believing that their puny arsenal can take on the US Army and ANY MINUTE NOW, ISIS will drop from the trees in rural bum-fuck East Texas and kick in their doors to rape their dogs and take their wimmen.

Guess that's enough to arrest someone now, right, gun nuts?

Because if you wanna talk "slippery slope", detaining and arresting someone because they "might" do something, or because they "said" they're "thinking" about doing something is a good way to start that slippery slope.

Do kids who shoot up schools send out about a million warning signs? Damn skippy they do.

Know who sees those first and every single subsequent signs?

You do. You do. You do. You do.

Because they're never *ever* the kids of liberal gun-hating parents. Ever.

They're *your* goddamn kids. Yours.

And you know that they're twitchy and have anger issues and should not be armed. You've known it since they started walking and talking. Lord knows you've tried your best to beat it out of them; to make them fine upstanding citizens. You've done all you know how. You tell them every single day not to be such an asshole or they'll get *another* ass-whoopin'.

You have guns. Lots of them. You probably even gave that kid his first gun- as a sign that you believe he's grown up and responsible and expecting him to fill those worthy shoes.

Your guns are not locked up. Who locks up guns? How are you supposed to drop that gang-banger who leaps thru an open window at 1am to steal your big screen TV and vintage collection of beef jerky?

And now another one of *your* kids has killed again. Pretty much every day school is in session in the US, there is an incident involving a gun. They don't all end in death, but guns are there.

Arm the teachers! That'll fix it. Expect those teachers to point a gun at your child and shoot him in the head if needed!

Some brave Texas schools have already done it and post signs around the perimeter- "This school has armed teachers who will protect our children using whatever force necessary". Wow. What a brave thing! So smart. How high is that school's liability insurance, now? Are they taking that money away from lunches, or art classes, or raising school taxes for everyone in the district? I mean...you can't take away from the football program. There are limits.

But right now...this minute...this time...

You're blaming the FBI for "dropping the ball". You're blaming the police and the school for "dropping the ball".

Those entities of creeping government over-reach that you rail about every day- that they'd "better not come sniffing around expecting to take *my guns* by god or I'll go down shooting their sorry asses! Cold, dead hands, baby!"

You made these little monsters who are shooting up our schools.

They've watched you and listen to you and just like kids everywhere, they emulate and admire...you.

"What's happened in the last 30 years that our society has come to this? Kids every day shooting up their fellow students and teachers in school, for fuck's sake? Must be the video games, the Ritalin, the liberal "everyone gets an award" upbringing, the lack of GOD in schools...it's a damn shame."

What happened?

30 years of shifting the role of guns as hunting tools into guns as "home protection" tools happened. That gun in the back window of every pickup in a rural high school 30 years ago was used to shoot squirrels. The AR-15(s) in your home get used for target practice...aiming at human-shaped targets.

30 years of stockpiling weapons and ammo because "the liberals are going to ban them all!"

30 years of a deep and growing distrust of the American government like it's some amorphous entity instead of a group of people *we* vote into office and can just as easily vote out.

30 years of the middle class losing ground while the tippy top get richer and richer. It sucks and it's not fair and it makes for a desperate exhausting and angry existence where the only thing you have control over anymore is how many goddamn guns you have and you feel you have done *one* thing in a manly manner- you've protected your family...if you can keep the goddamn liberals away.

30 years of dying of preventable things because health care in this nation is so expensive...but that's how life is, right? It's not fair. Don't talk to us about socialistic commie universal health care. We die free!

30 years of (for the first time in America's history) the younger generation knowing they will make less money and die younger than the previous one. That it's going to be hard or impossible to go to college after high school so hard or impossible to make enough to live on working one job. So 30 years of telling yourselves that college ain't that important anyway- it's a liberal cesspool.

Who made the school shooters? You did.

Don't get me wrong. Liberals fuck up just as badly as parents. Kids of "liberals" have mental illness, too. The only difference? Ready access to firearms.

They do kill themselves at a horrifying rate- the capitalist patriarchy is a fucking meat grinder and we're tits deep in it. They take pills. They hang themselves. They wrap their cars around trees.

But it's your kids who reach a breaking point that you watch every single day as it builds and builds and in between punishing them for being assholes, you think, "Sure he's pissed off. I'm pissed off, too. He's young and hot-headed. He'll grow out of it."

And one day your kid grabs an AR-15 out of the closet and a few handguns out of the drawer, and they take them to school...

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-10215711904866342272017-03-01T14:49:00.002-06:002017-03-01T14:49:25.733-06:00NOT Live-Tweeting Trump's NOT a State of the Union SpeechSince I was at work, I didn't do a live-feed of Trump's speech. So, here ya go.

TRUMP: Thank you very much. Mr. Speaker, Mr. Vice President, members of Congress, the first lady of the United States ...
Let's get this out of the way first thing. Trump did not write this speech, he had no input on this speech, and he was told by someone that he needed to stick with the speech and not wander all over the place like he usually does.
(APPLAUSE)
... and citizens of America, tonight, as we mark the conclusion of our celebration of Black History Month, we are reminded of our nation's path toward civil rights and the work that still remains to be done.
Recent threats ...
(APPLAUSE)
Recent threats targeting Jewish community centers and vandalism of Jewish cemeteries, as well as last week's shooting in Kansas City, remind us that while we may be a nation divided on policies, we are a country that stands united in condemning hate and evil in all of its very ugly forms.
You mean all the hate-crimes that are occurring because you specifically are not speaking against them? Those hate-crimes?
(APPLAUSE)
Each American generation passes the torch of truth, liberty and justice, in an unbroken chain all the way down to the present. That torch is now in our hands. And we will use it to light up the world
I am here tonight to deliver a message of unity and strength, and it is a message deeply delivered from my heart. A new chapter ...
(APPLAUSE)
... of American greatness is now beginning. A new national pride is sweeping across our nation. And a new surge of optimism is placing impossible dreams firmly within our grasp. What we are witnessing today is the renewal of the American spirit. Our allies will find that America is once again ready to lead.
Most Americans don't trust you as far as they can throw you. You cannot talk trash for over a year and then come in with sweet words and promises and expect everyone to say, "HEY- look! He IS presidential!" Those of us who have suffered at the hands and minds of abusive assholes know one when we see one. Lipstick on a pig, man. Lipstick on a pig…
(APPLAUSE)
All the nations of the world — friend or foe — will find that America is strong, America is proud, and America is free. In nine years, the United States will celebrate the 250th anniversary of our founding, 250 years since the day we declared our independence. It will be one of the great milestones in the history of the world.
Will we make it? Who knows? You love to keep us in suspense so we "tune in next week".
But what will America look like as we reach our 250th year? What kind of country will we leave for our children? I will not allow the mistakes of recent decades past to define the course of our future.
So, the Obama decade where we crawled out of the mire the Bush decade plunged us into? Or that Bushy Plungy one? You'll have to be more specific.
For too long, we've watched our middle class shrink as we've exported our jobs and wealth to foreign countries. We've financed and built one global project after another, but ignored the fates of our children in the inner cities of Chicago, Baltimore, Detroit and so many other places throughout our land.
See: EVERY TRUMP ENTERPRISE OVERSEAS
We've defended the borders of other nations while leaving our own borders wide open for anyone to cross, and for drugs to pour in at a now unprecedented rate. Yeah, immigration is dropping, we HAVE fences AND walls and more border guards and deportations now than any time in our history…but let's not let facts get in the way of your pretty words… And we've spent trillions and trillions of dollars overseas, while our infrastructure at home has so badly crumbled.
Then, in 2016, the earth shifted beneath our feet. The rebellion started as a quiet protest, spoken by families of all colors and creeds, families who just wanted a fair shot for their children, and a fair hearing for their concerns.
Yes- the rise of the new Nationalism. Germany keeps warning us about that…
But then the quiet voices became a loud chorus, as thousands of citizens now spoke out together, from cities small and large, all across our country.
Those were Hillary voters. Well over 3 million more than the ones who voted for you, you pompous, fact-challenged toddler.
Finally, the chorus became an earthquake, and the people turned out by the tens of millions, and they were all united by one very simple, but crucial demand, that America must put its own citizens first, because only then can we truly make America great again.
That was the electoral college that decided that, proving that they are not doing what they were intended to do- make sure an ignoramus gets elected. Their bad.
(APPLAUSE)
Dying industries will come roaring back to life. Heroic veterans will get the care they so desperately need. Our military will be given the resources its brave warriors so richly deserve.
Yanno how when liberals talk about what can happen and the conservatives pat them on the head and say, "That's nice but how will you PAY for it?"
Crumbling infrastructure will be replaced with new roads, bridges, tunnels, airports and railways, gleaming across our very, very beautiful land. Our terrible drug epidemic will slow down and ultimately stop. And our neglected inner cities will see a rebirth of hope, safety and opportunity.
See: previous comment. The election is over, asshole. Time to show us how you're going to pay for it. And maybe your own tax returns, while you're at it.
Above all else, we will keep our promises to the American people.
Like that Muslim ban? That's working out GREAT!
(APPLAUSE)
Thank you. It's been a little over a month since my inauguration, and I want to take this moment to update the nation on the progress I've made in keeping those promises. Since my election, Ford, Fiat-Chrysler, General Motors, Sprint, Softbank, Lockheed, Intel, Walmart and many others have announced that they will invest billions and billions of dollars in the United States and will create tens of thousands of new American jobs.
You are so full of SHIT- Every one of those deals had been in the making for years before you paid a bunch of lackeys to cheer you riding an escalator.
(APPLAUSE)
The stock market has gained almost $3 trillion in value since the election on Nov. 8, a record. We've saved taxpayers hundreds of millions of dollars by bringing down the price of fantastic — and it is a fantastic — new F-35 jet fighter, and we'll be saving billions more on contracts all across our government.
Wait- I thought we were SPENDING money now on the military…
We have placed a hiring freeze on nonmilitary and nonessential federal workers.
Because nothing creates jobs like a hiring freeze!
We have begun to drain the swamp of government corruption by imposing a five-year ban on lobbying by executive branch officials — and a lifetime ban ...
…by putting in place people who have no damn idea how government is SUPPOSED to run!
(APPLAUSE)
Thank you. Thank you. And a lifetime ban on becoming lobbyists for a foreign government. We have undertaken a historic effort to massively reduce job-crushing regulations, creating a deregulation task force inside of every government agency ...
And a rule that the sitting POTUS cannot do business around the world? Where is THAT rule?
(APPLAUSE)
... and we're imposing a new rule which mandates that for every one new regulation, two old regulations must be eliminated.
What a childish and arbitrary piece of crap rule that is. We're not talking about cleaning out your sock drawer for fuck's sake.
(APPLAUSE)
We're going to stop the regulations that threaten the future and livelihood of our great coal miners.
…by poisoning their water so they all die and no one will miss those jobs!
(APPLAUSE)
We have cleared the way for the construction of the Keystone and Dakota Access Pipelines ...
…because Trump has invested in those ventures that do NOTHING for America but will line Trump's pockets and what's good for TRUMP is good for America, right?
(APPLAUSE)
... thereby creating tens of thousands of jobs. Less than 100 permanent jobs. Just sayin'… And I've issued a new directive that new American pipelines be made with American steel.
(APPLAUSE)
We have withdrawn the United States from the job-killing Trans-Pacific Partnership.
Thereby telling our allies that we don't give a crap about anyone but us.
(APPLAUSE)
And with the help of Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, we have formed a council with our neighbors in Canada to help ensure that women entrepreneurs have access to the networks, markets and capital they need to start a business and live out their financial dreams.
WTF you need a COUNCIL for that? To see if it's a GOOD IDEA?
(APPLAUSE)
To protect our citizens, I have directed the Department of Justice to form a task force on reducing violent crime. I have further ordered the Departments of Homeland Security and Justice, along with the Department of State and the director of national intelligence, to coordinate an aggressive strategy to dismantle the criminal cartels that have spread all across our nation.
So…you and every president in at LEAST my lifetime. Bravo, Mr. Original Idea.
(APPLAUSE)
We will stop the drugs from pouring into our country and poisoning our youth, and we will expand treatment for those who have become so badly addicted.
Shut up. You will not.
(APPLAUSE)
At the same time, my administration has answered the pleas of the American people for immigration enforcement and border security.
Which people? ALL Americans? Like the majority who want reforms? Or just the ones who don't like brown people?
(APPLAUSE)
By finally enforcing our immigration laws, we will raise wages, help the unemployed, save billions and billions of dollars, and make our communities safer for everyone.
See: Obama's actual record on deportation, reinforcing the border and surge of border agents.
(APPLAUSE)
We want all Americans to succeed, but that can't happen in an environment of lawless chaos.
Oh, ya. That whole "Law and Order" administration. *wink wink* send the local forces more tanks!
We must restore integrity and the rule of law at our borders.
"Restore"? I thought you said it was never there?
(APPLAUSE)
For that reason, we will soon begin the construction of a great, great wall along our southern border.
Fuck your wall. The only reason this is in the speech is it's at about the halfway point and your most ardent minions were starting to doze off.
(APPLAUSE)
As we speak tonight, we are removing gang members, drug dealers and criminals that threaten our communities and prey on our very innocent citizens. Bad ones are going out as I speak, and as I promised throughout the campaign. To any in Congress who do not believe we should enforce our laws, I would ask you this one question: What would you say to the American family that loses their jobs, their income or their loved one because America refused to uphold its laws and defend its borders?
You mean all the stuff that was already being done? Quite the little opportunistic parasite, aren't you?
(APPLAUSE)
Our obligation is to serve, protect and defend the citizens of the United States. We are also taking strong measures to protect our nation from radical Islamic terrorism.
Why say "radical"? ALL terrorism is radical. That's the whole point. Unless there's some "inoffensive terrorism" we just haven't noticed yet...
(APPLAUSE)
According to data provided by the Department of Justice, the vast majority of individuals convicted of terrorism and terrorism-related offenses since 9/11 came here from outside of our country. That's patently 100% wrong. MOST of our terrorists have been born here or white, or both. We have seen the attacks at home, from Boston to San Bernardino to the Pentagon and, yes, even the World Trade Center. We have seen the attacks in France, in Belgium, in Germany and all over the world.
It is not compassionate, but reckless to allow uncontrolled entry from places where proper vetting cannot occur.
We have proper vetting. You just don't understand what that means.
(APPLAUSE)
Those given the high honor of admission to the United States should support this country and love its people and its values. We cannot allow a beachhead of terrorism to form inside America, and we cannot allow our nation to become a sanctuary for extremists.
So you're deporting all extremist fundamentalist Christians and all KKK members and neo-Nazi's and people who clutch the Confederate Flag and holler "THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN!"? Cool.
(APPLAUSE) That is why my administration has been working on improved vetting procedures, and we will shortly take new steps to keep our nation safe, and to keep those out who will do us harm.
By tanking our tourism industry with your ridiculous Muslim ban. Well done.
(APPLAUSE)
As promised, I directed the Department of Defense to develop a plan to demolish and destroy ISIS, a network of lawless savages that have slaughtered Muslims and Christians, and men, women and children of all faiths and all beliefs. We will work with our allies, including our friends and allies in the Muslim world, to extinguish this vile enemy from our planet.
Super! Because NO ONE HAD THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE, you narcissistic moron.
(APPLAUSE)
I have also imposed new sanctions on entities and individuals who support Iran's ballistic missile program, and reaffirmed our unbreakable alliance with the state of Israel.
Whew! Good thing you mentioned Israel, because your minions were nodding off again!
(APPLAUSE)
Finally, I have kept my promise to appoint a justice to the United States Supreme Court, from my list of 20 judges, who will defend our Constitution.
Your "promise"? It's your damn job, not some favor you're doing us.
(APPLAUSE)
I am greatly honored to have Maureen Scalia with us in the gallery tonight.
(APPLAUSE)
Thank you, Maureen. Her late, great husband, Antonin Scalia, will forever be a symbol of American justice.
To fill his seat, we have chosen Judge Neil Gorsuch, a man of incredible skill and deep devotion to the law. He was confirmed unanimously by the Court of Appeals, and I am asking the Senate to swiftly approve his nomination.
And I hope they move just as swiftly as they did when Obama chose a justice…
(APPLAUSE)
Tonight, as I outline the next steps we must take as a country, we must honestly acknowledge the circumstances we inherited. Ninety-four million Americans are out of the labor force. This number includes people who are RETIRED. Over 43 million people are now living in poverty. Which is less than when Bush tanked our economy. And over 43 million Americans are on food stamps. Most of them poor whites, who voted overwhelmingly for you.
More than one in five people in their prime working years are not working. We have the worst financial recovery in 65 years. In the last eight years, the past administration has put on more new debt than nearly all of the other presidents combined.
I just can't. Can this guy or anyone around him use Google? Seriously?
We've lost more than one-fourth of our manufacturing jobs since Nafta was approved and we've lost 60,000 factories since China joined the World Trade Organization in 2001. THAT'S WHERE YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER MAKE YOUR CRAP, YOU BLOVIATING WALRUS. Our trade deficit in goods with the world last year was nearly $800 billion. And overseas, we have inherited a series of tragic foreign policy disasters.
Solving these and so many other pressing problems will require us to work past the differences of party. Great. Your side first. Our side tried for 8 years and got shit on every day by your side. It will require us to tap into the American spirit that has overcome every challenge throughout our long and storied history. But to accomplish our goals at home and abroad, we must restart the engine of the American economy, making it easier for companies to do business in the United States and much, much harder for companies to leave our country.
(APPLAUSE)
Right now, American companies are taxed at one of the highest rates anywhere in the world. No, they're not. MY GOD, GOOGLE. My economic team is developing historic tax reform that will reduce the tax rate on our companies so they can compete and thrive anywhere and with anyone.
(APPLAUSE)
It will be a big, big cut. <<< As far as I can tell, this is the only sentence in the entire speech he wrote himself. <this as="" br="" can="" entire="" far="" he="" himself.="" i="" in="" is="" only="" sentence="" speech="" tell="" the="" wrote="">At the same time, we will provide massive tax relief for the middle class. We must create a level playing field for American companies and our workers — have to do it. <<< Ad lib. Because otherwise it's a perfectly good sentence. </this>
<this as="" br="" can="" entire="" far="" he="" himself.="" i="" in="" is="" only="" sentence="" speech="" tell="" the="" wrote=""><and add="" and="" anything="" br="" don="" he="" here="" his="" limit="" mr.="" of="" president="" reaching="" read="" right="" t="" that-="" the="" ust="" was="" winged="" words="">(APPLAUSE)
Currently, when we ship products out of America, many other countries make us pay very high tariffs and taxes, but when foreign companies ship their products into America, we charge them nothing or almost nothing.
Business concepts using purposely little words. Now we're talkin' Trumpese.I just met with officials and workers from a great American company, Harley-Davidson. In fact, they proudly displayed five of their magnificent motorcycles, made in the U.S.A., on the front lawn of the White House.
Assembled in America using foreign parts.(APPLAUSE)
And they wanted me to ride one, and I said, "No, thank you."
(LAUGHTER)
At our meeting, I asked them, "How are you doing? How is business?" They said that it's good. I asked them further, "How are you doing with other countries, mainly international sales?"
They told me — without even complaining, because they have been so mistreated for so long that they've become used to it — that it's very hard to do business with other countries, because they tax our goods at such a high rate. They said that in the case of another country, they taxed their motorcycles at 100 percent. But people in those countries buy them even at a huge markup because they are Harleys and everyone wants one. You forgot that part.They weren't even asking for a change. But I am. I believe ...
(APPLAUSE)
I believe strongly in free trade, but it also has to be fair trade. It's been a long time since we had fair trade.
The first Republican president, Abraham Lincoln, warned that "the abandonment of the protective policy by the American government will produce want and ruin among our people."
Lincoln was right, and it's time we heeded his advice and his words.
(APPLAUSE)
I am not going to let America and its great companies and workers be taken — advantage of us any longer. They have taken advantage of our country no longer. AND DONNIE'S BACK! THERE'S THAT VERBIAGE WE'RE USED TO HEARING FROM HIM!</and></this>
<this as="" br="" can="" entire="" far="" he="" himself.="" i="" in="" is="" only="" sentence="" speech="" tell="" the="" wrote=""><and add="" and="" anything="" br="" don="" he="" here="" his="" limit="" mr.="" of="" president="" reaching="" read="" right="" t="" that-="" the="" ust="" was="" winged="" words=""><there br="" broke="" cage="" donnie="" finally="" he="" his="" of="" out="">(APPLAUSE)
I am going to bring back millions of jobs. Protecting our workers also means reforming our system of legal immigration.
So, it's not just the "illegals" we're going after. Gotcha.(APPLAUSE)
The current, outdated system depresses wages for our poorest workers and puts great pressure on taxpayers. Nations around the world, like Canada, Australia and many others, have a merit-based immigration system.
They also have a liveable wage for ALL workers, which might have something to do with it. But let's do concentrate on blaming our immigrants…(APPLAUSE)
It's a basic principle that those seeking to enter a country ought to be able to support themselves financially. Yet in America we do not enforce this rule, straining the very public resources that our poorest citizens rely upon.
…and you want to cut those programs. Because that will help our poor people. According to the National Academy of Sciences, our current immigration system costs American taxpayers many billions of dollars a year. Switching away from this current system of lower-skilled immigration, and instead adopting a merit-based system, we will have so many more benefits. It will save countless dollars, raise workers' wages and help struggling families, including immigrant families, enter the middle class. And they will do it quickly, and they will be very, very happy, indeed.
That's already happening. Skilled immigrants have ALWAYS quickly assimilated into the middle class- those are the brown people our poor white people hate, remember? (APPLAUSE)
I believe that real and positive immigration reform is possible, as long as we focus on the following goals: to improve jobs and wages for Americans, to strengthen our nation's security and to restore respect for our laws.
If we are guided by the well-being of American citizens, then I believe Republicans and Democrats can work together to achieve an outcome that has eluded our country for decades.
Exactly what outcome? Less brown people?(APPLAUSE)
Another Republican president, Dwight D. Eisenhower, initiated the last truly great national infrastructure program: the building of the interstate highway system. The time has come for a new program of national rebuilding.
(APPLAUSE)
America has spent approximately $6 trillion in the Middle East, all the while our infrastructure at home is crumbling. Please note which party keeps voting against improvements. I'll wait right here. Open a new browser on your phone (using your Tweeting finger…your tiny little Tweeting finger) and Google it.With the $6 trillion, we could have rebuilt our country twice, and maybe even three times, if we had people who had the ability to negotiate. Like a serial bankruptcy court guest? One that stiffs contractors to the tune of 3,000 lawsuits? No, thanks.(APPLAUSE)
To launch our national rebuilding, I will be asking Congress to approve legislation that produces a $1 trillion investment in infrastructure of the United States, financed through both public and private capital, creating millions of new jobs.
Again. WHEW- BECAUSE NO ONE HAS WANTED THAT TO HAPPEN BEFORE!(APPLAUSE)
This effort will be guided by two core principles: Buy American and hire American.
YOU FIRST, ASSHOLE.(APPLAUSE)
Tonight, I am also calling on this Congress to repeal and replace Obamacare ...
(APPLAUSE)
... with reforms that expand choice, increase access, lower costs and at the same time provide better health care.
Reform: to change something already in existence to make improvements. You can't repeal AND reform, you idiot.
(APPLAUSE)
Mandating every American to buy government-approved health insurance was never the right solution for our country. So, you're going to take health care out of the hands of the private market? Because that's the only viable alternative.(APPLAUSE)
The way to make health insurance available to everyone is to lower the cost of health insurance, and that is what we are going to do.
Yay! Public option, here we come!(APPLAUSE)
Obamacare premiums nationwide have increased by double and triple digits. Those are private company premiums. There's no such thing as "Obamacare Insurance". Blame the private insurance companies. As an example, Arizona went up 116 percent last year alone. Gov. Matt Bevin of Kentucky just said Obamacare is failing in his state, the state of Kentucky, and it's unsustainable and collapsing. Did Matty-boy accept the Medicaid expansion? No? HUH.One third of the counties have only one insurer, and they're losing them fast, they are losing them so fast. They're leaving. And many Americans have no choice at all. There's no choice left.
See: unregulated private insurers who are slicing and dicing our nation because they can. I'm repeating myself, right? Remember when you were told that you could keep your doctor and keep your plan? We now know that all of those promises have been totally broken. Obamacare is collapsing, and we must act decisively to protect all Americans.
(screams into pillow)(APPLAUSE)
Action is not a choice; it is a necessity. So I am calling on all Democrats and Republicans in Congress to work with us to save Americans from this imploding Obamacare disaster.
Like the Republicans worked with Democrats to write the bill in the first place? When they were begged to give their input for several YEARS before whining that no one asked them and it was "passed in the middle of the night"?(APPLAUSE)
Here are the principles that should guide Congress as we move to create a better health care system for all Americans.
First, we should ensure that Americans with pre-existing conditions have access to coverage and that we have a stable transition for Americans currently enrolled in the health care exchanges.
Access to coverage and being able to afford it are two different things. Will there be a cap on premiums?(APPLAUSE)
Secondly, we should help Americans purchase their own coverage, through the use of tax credits and expanded health savings accounts, but it must be the plan they want, not the plan forced on them by our government.
YES- HSA's! Because the average American will quickly amass say, the $75,000 a pacemaker costs or upwards of a cool million for cancer care…(APPLAUSE)
Thirdly, we should give our state governors the resources and flexibility they need with Medicaid to make sure no one is left out.
It was called the Medicaid expansion and every single GOP governor refused it. Every. Single. One.(APPLAUSE)
Fourth, we should implement legal reforms that protect patients and doctors from unnecessary costs that drive up the price of insurance and work to bring down the artificially high price of drugs and bring them down immediately.
(whispers) *Public. Option.*(APPLAUSE)
And finally, the time has come to give Americans the freedom to purchase health insurance across state lines ...
(APPLAUSE)
... which will create a truly competitive national marketplace that will bring costs way down and provide far better care. So important. <<< another ad lib. Because otherwise we wouldn't realize how important insurance is. It's important. So important.
ALL OF THE ABOVE WERE IN THE ORIGINAL BILL. ALL OF IT. ALONG WITH A PUBLIC OPTION TO OPT INTO MEDICARE IF YOU WERE PAYING INTO IT AND IF YOU WANTED TO, AND THE GOP AND INSURANCE COMPANIES HAD MASS ANEURISMS AND FAINTED.Everything that is broken in our country can be fixed. Every problem can be solved. And every hurting family can find healing and hope. Our citizens deserve this, and so much more, so why not join forces and finally get the job done and get it done right?
Fuck you. Just…fuck you. You are every abuser I have ever come in contact with, but less attractive and more creepy.
(APPLAUSE)
On this and so many other things, Democrats and Republicans should get together and unite for the good of our country and for the good of the American people.
"I know I beat you every day and blow all our money at the track, but we need to stay together- for the sake of the children. Don't you love our children?"(APPLAUSE)
My administration wants to work with members of both parties to make child care accessible and affordable, to help ensure new parents that they have paid family leave ...
No, you don't.... to invest in women's health, and to promote clean air and clean water, and to rebuild our military and our infrastructure.
Shutting down Planned Parenthood and lifting regulations so mines can dump sludge into the water is a funny way of doing those things.(APPLAUSE)
True love for our people requires us to find common ground, to advance the common good, and to cooperate on behalf of every American child who deserves a much brighter future.
Do not put the blame for this mess on the people who are being victimized. Do NOT.An incredible young woman is with us this evening who should serve as an inspiration to us all. Today is Rare Disease Day, and joining us in the gallery is a rare disease survivor, Megan Crowley. Megan ...
(APPLAUSE)
Megan was diagnosed with Pompe disease, a rare and serious illness, when she was 15 months old. She was not expected to live past 5. On receiving this news, Megan's dad, John, fought with everything he had to save the life of his precious child. He founded a company to look for a cure and helped develop the drug that saved Megan's life. Today she is 20 years old and a sophomore at Notre Dame.
(APPLAUSE)
Megan's story is about the unbounded power of a father's love for a daughter. But our slow and burdensome approval process at the Food and Drug Administration keeps too many advances, like the one that saved Megan's life, from reaching those in need.
If we slash the restraints, not just at the F.D.A. but across our government, then we will be blessed with far more miracles just like Megan.
Also, many illnesses, birth defects and deaths from dangerous untested drugs. But hey- MEGAN.(APPLAUSE)
In fact, our children will grow up in a nation of miracles. But to achieve this future, we must enrich the mind — and the souls — of every American child. Education is the civil rights issue of our time.
I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.(APPLAUSE)
I am calling upon members of both parties to pass an education bill that funds school choice for disadvantaged youth, including millions of African-American and Latino children.
(APPLAUSE)
These families should be free to choose the public, private, charter, magnet, religious or home school that is right for them.
Great. "Separate but equal". Where have we heard that before?(APPLAUSE)
Joining us tonight in the gallery is a remarkable woman, Denisha Merriweather. As a young girl, Denisha struggled in school and failed third grade twice. But then she was able to enroll in a private center for learning — great learning center — with the help of a tax credit and a scholarship program. Today, she is the first in her family to graduate, not just from high school, but from college. Later this year, she will get her master's degree in social work. We want all children to be able to break the cycle of poverty just like Denisha.
…or we could improve our public schools so everyone can be Denisha without failing 3rd grade twice and jumping thru tax credit and scholarship hoops first. Just a thought.(APPLAUSE)
But to break the cycle of poverty, we must also break the cycle of violence. The murder rate in 2015 experienced its largest single-year increase in nearly half a century. In Chicago, more than 4,000 people were shot last year alone, and the murder rate so far this year has been even higher. This is not acceptable in our society.
Yay! We get to the part about common-sense gun control!(APPLAUSE)
Every American child should be able to grow up in a safe community, to attend a great school and to have access to a high-paying job.
(APPLAUSE)
But to create this future, we must work with — not against — not against — the men and women of law enforcement.
Oops. Nope. Just "give the cops more and bigger guns". What was I thinking? This is the guy who signed an EO to allow mentally ill people to get guns…(APPLAUSE)
We must build bridges of cooperation and trust, not drive the wedge of disunity and it's — really, it's what it is, division. It's pure, unadulterated division. We have to unify. Police and sheriffs are members of our community. They're friends and neighbors, they're mothers and fathers, sons and daughters, and they leave behind loved ones every day who worry about whether or not they'll come home safe and sound. We must support the incredible men and women of law enforcement.
I don't know a single person who hates cops. That entire paragraph was divisive.
(APPLAUSE)
And we must support the victims of crime. I have ordered the Department of Homeland Security to create an office to serve American victims. The office is called Voice, Victims of Immigration Crime Engagement.
Why just "immigration crime"? WTF?We are providing a voice to those who have been ignored by our media and silenced by special interests. Joining us ...
No one is ignoring victims. No one.(APPLAUSE)
Joining us in the audience tonight are four very brave Americans whose government failed them. Their names are Jamiel Shaw, Susan Oliver, Jenna Oliver and Jessica Davis. Jamiel's 17-year-old son was viciously murdered by an illegal immigrant gang member who had just been released from prison. Jamiel Shaw Jr. was an incredible young man with unlimited potential who was getting ready to go to college, where he would have excelled as a great college quarterback.
But he never got the chance. His father, who is in the audience tonight, has become a very good friend of mine. Jamiel, thank you. Thank you.
(APPLAUSE)
Also with us are Susan Oliver and Jessica Davis. Their husbands — Deputy Sheriff Danny Oliver and Detective Michael Davis — were slain in the line of duty in California. They were pillars of their community. These brave men were viciously gunned down by an illegal immigrant with a criminal record and two prior deportations. Should have never been in our country.
Sitting with Susan is her daughter, Jenna. Jenna, I want you to know that your father was a hero and that tonight you have the love of an entire country supporting you and praying for you.
(APPLAUSE)
To Jamiel, Jenna, Susan and Jessica, I want you to know that we will never stop fighting for justice. Your loved ones will never, ever be forgotten. We will always honor their memory.
What the hell? Where's the families of the people Dylan Roof killed? (APPLAUSE)
Finally, to keep America safe, we must provide the men and women of the United States military with the tools they need to prevent war — if they must — they have to fight and they only have to win.
(APPLAUSE)
I am sending Congress a budget that rebuilds the military, eliminates the defense sequester...
(APPLAUSE)
... and calls for one of the largest increases in national defense spending in American history.
HOW ARE WE PAYING FOR THAT? We're already the biggest military ever known to mankind, but other than that…HOW ARE WE PAYING FOR THAT?My budget will also increase funding for our veterans. Our veterans have delivered for this nation, and now we must deliver for them.
How about not making any more veterans, you sabre-rattling draft-dodging blowhard.
(APPLAUSE)
The challenges we face as a nation are great. But our people are even greater. And none are greater or braver than those who fight for America in uniform.
How would you know?(APPLAUSE)
We are blessed to be joined tonight by Carryn Owens, the widow of U.S. Navy special operator, Senior Chief William "Ryan" Owens. Ryan died as he lived, a warrior and a hero, battling against terrorism and securing our nation.
(APPLAUSE)
I just spoke to our great General [Jim] Mattis just now who reconfirmed that, and I quote, "Ryan was a part of a highly successful raid that generated large amounts of vital intelligence that will lead to many more victories in the future against our enemy."
Ryan's legacy is etched into eternity. Thank you.
(APPLAUSE)
And Ryan is looking down right now. You know that. And he's very happy, because I think he just broke a record.
(APPLAUSE)
For as the Bible teaches us, there is no greater act of love than to lay down one's life for one's friends. Ryan laid down his life for his friends, for his country and for our freedom. And we will never forget Ryan.
Ryan is dead because of you, Mr. President. He's dead because YOU didn't listen to your advisors. The raid was a disaster and got NOTHING we can use other than a mess of dead people, including children. To hold up that man's widow like a bauble and proof of your "greatness" and then to tell her her "ratings" are great (due to the applause) is heinous. You, sir, are a monster. (APPLAUSE)
To those allies who wonder what kind of a friend America will be, look no further than the heroes who wear our uniform. Our foreign policy calls for a direct, robust and meaningful engagement with the world. It is American leadership based on vital security interests that we share with our allies all across the globe.
We strongly support NATO, an alliance forged through the bonds of two world wars, that dethroned fascism ...
The same NATO you said was bad? That NATO?(APPLAUSE)
... and a Cold War and defeated communism.
(APPLAUSE)
But our partners must meet their financial obligations. And now, based on our very strong and frank discussions, they are beginning to do just that. In fact, I can tell you the money is pouring in. Very nice.
Shaking down our allies for their lunch money. Perfect. "Very nice".
(APPLAUSE)We expect our partners, whether in NATO, in the Middle East or in the Pacific, to take a direct and meaningful role in both strategic and military operations, and pay their fair share of the cost — have to do that. <<< another ad lib. He's clearly at the breaking point. <another a="" ad="" because="" br="" can="" good="" it="" lib.="" perfectly="" ruins="" sentence.="" tell="" you="">We will respect historic institutions, but we will respect the foreign rights of all nations. And they have to respect our rights as a nation, also.
Great! Palestine gets its own country!(APPLAUSE)
Free nations are the best vehicle for expressing the will of the people, and America respects the right of all nations to chart their own path. Unless they have oil. Then we "take" the oil. Right? My job is not to represent the world. My job is to represent the United States of America.
(APPLAUSE)
But we know that America is better off when there is less conflict, not more. We must learn from the mistakes of the past. We have seen the war and the destruction that have ravaged and raged throughout the world. All across the world. <<< He can't help it now. He had to add this because "throughout the world" was not bigly enough.<another ad="" because="" bigly="" br="" enough.="" lib.="" t="" the="" throughout="" wasn="" world="">The only long-term solution for these humanitarian disasters, in many cases, is to create the conditions where displaced persons can safely return home and begin the long, long process of rebuilding.
Have you thought about not blowing the shit out of their countries anymore? Asking for a friend…(APPLAUSE)
America is willing to find new friends, and to forge new partnerships, where shared interests align. We want harmony and stability, not war and conflict. We want peace, wherever peace can be found. America is friends today with former enemies. See: Russia and the blossoming bromance between Donnie and Vlad. Some of our closest allies, decades ago, fought on the opposite side of these terrible, terrible wars. This history should give us all faith in the possibilities for a better world.
Hopefully, the 250th year for America will see a world that is more peaceful, more just, and more free.
Your brand of Nationalism will not do that. Sorry. Spoiler?On our 100th anniversary in 1876, citizens from across our nation came to Philadelphia to celebrate America's centennial. At that celebration, the country's builders and artists and inventors showed off their wonderful creations. Alexander Graham Bell displayed his telephone for the first time. Remington unveiled the first typewriter. An early attempt was made at electric light. Thomas Edison showed an automatic telegraph and an electric pen. Imagine the wonders our country could know in America's 250th year.
I was curious because he didn't mention our bi-centennial in 1976. Maybe because the POTUS was Carter and we weren't all up in everyone else's business worldwide in a pushy and bullying manner? (APPLAUSE)
Think of the marvels we could achieve if we simply set free the dreams of our people. Cures to the illnesses that have always plagued us are not too much to hope. American footprints on distant worlds are not too big a dream. Millions lifted from welfare to work is not too much to expect. And streets where mothers are safe from fear — schools where children learn in peace, and jobs where Americans prosper and grow — are not too much to ask.
"Oh, baby. If only you stay, we can do great things together! I know I lose my temper sometimes and sometimes I slap you around a little, but it's only because I just LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Here- your favorite flowers…and $100. Go buy yourself something pretty!"(APPLAUSE)
When we have all of this, we will have made America greater than ever before, for all Americans. This is our vision. This is our mission. But we can only get there together. We are one people, with one destiny.
We all bleed the same blood. We all salute the same great American flag. And we are all made by the same God.
Oh, brother. *gets out waders…(APPLAUSE)
When we fulfill this vision, when we celebrate our 250 years of glorious freedom, we will look back on tonight as when this new chapter of American greatness began. Or the moment our nation who has been horrified and shocked by your actions for the last month just gives the hell up and latches onto your pretty words because we're too damn tired to keep up with the mental insults to our intelligence and hearts? Same diff, I guess…The time for small thinking is over. The time for trivial fights is behind us. So you're closing your Twitter account and turning off SNL because JESUS YOU'RE EMBARRASSING. We just need the courage to share the dreams that fill our hearts, the bravery to express the hopes that stir our souls, and the confidence to turn those hopes and those dreams into action.
Ooh. Nice. Adapted from the AA slogan. Very clever.From now on, America will be empowered by our aspirations, not burdened by our fears, inspired by the future, not bound by failures of the past, and guided by a vision, not blinded by our doubts.
This speechwriter moonlights at Hallmark. I guarantee it.I am asking all citizens to embrace this renewal of the American spirit. I am asking all members of Congress to join me in dreaming big and bold and daring things for our country. I am asking everyone watching tonight to seize this moment. Believe in yourselves. Believe in your future. And believe, once more, in America.
Thank you, God bless you, and God bless the United States.
Alrighty, then. He stuck mostly to the script, and didn't go "off reservation" more than a few times. Do I believe the pretty words? Not for a split second. You can't take a 70 year old guy who has done nothing but think of himself for seven decades and who has never had to work for a goddamn penny and expect him to turn all presidential and shit. Cannot.
Does he have a good speechwriter? Yep. Can he hold "character" for the time it took to read this? Mostly.
His agenda has not changed. His core beliefs and those of the people he has surrounded himself have not changed. If anything, sounding marginally sane and reasonable is more dangerous than "Crazy Random-Brain-Cells-Drunk-Sexting-Each-Other Trump".
Focus on his deeds, not his pretty words.
*Resist*
</another></another></there></and></this>lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-5769334963380419332017-02-07T13:57:00.001-06:002017-02-07T13:57:58.934-06:00To My Moderate Conservative Friends and Family......Nope. This is not another rant about how odious the man you voted into office is. Not that I don't think he's still odious, because of course he is. And unqualified and a liar and everything else I've ever said about him multiplied by a million since the inauguration.

But it's too fucking late, isn't it? You "won" and we "lost". This isn't about that, either, no matter how much your talking heads tell you it is- how much they vilify us- your friends and family who you KNOW are strong and loving and smart- you know us. You know what each of us has been thru personally and you know that we are driven and passionate about things that have affected our families and ourselves and our friends---even YOU. We have fought for you many times and will continue to do so.

The Women's Marches should have been a hint for you- worldwide objection to the man you put in office. But you made fun of them and yawned.

The ongoing, not-quitting, pushback to his Muslim ban, his executive orders that are poorly written and ill-thought out, his rejection of experience and preference for chaos...every day is a jarring, reeling descent into someplace America has never gone before.

This isn't drama. Obama never did this. Hillary would not have done it. W didn't do it. Even Skeletor Reagan didn't do this.

I know the entire election was one big contentious, exhausting, mind-numbing marathon and that on election day you went into that booth, held your nose, closed your eyes and pulled that lever for "Trump (R)", came out needing a shower and never wanted to think about it again.

And I'm sorry. But you can't do that.

If you love this nation even a fraction as much as those of us out marching and training an eagle eye on everything this administration does, you- you yourselves, you Moderate Conservative Americans MUST be even MORE vigilant than we are. And when he and/or his administration or your own representatives do something you disagree with, you MUST speak up and tell them so and make no bones about how unhappy you are.

Because you see, every liberal in the nation can stand shoulder to shoulder and yell at the top of our lungs and it won't matter as much as if just a few of YOU say, "Wait a sec. This shit's not right!" because YOU are their voter base.

So, in a nutshell, we, your fellow Americans, friends and family, need you to PAY ATTENTION. You're the ones who voted for a Swamp Draining and willingly tossed a guy up there with exactly zero experience in public office. Zero. It's your JOB to make damn sure he and his administration stay on the straight and narrow. YOUR job. Not ours. Yours. It's YOUR job to train the new guy that you hired. Not ours. You told us it was totally cool and he could do this job. TRAIN. HIM.

Say, as a fer instance...the Muslim ban. I've heard some of you grudgingly admit that it wasn't thought out well and punished a bunch of people who didn't deserve it. SEND AN EMAIL TO YOUR REPRESENTATIVES TO SAY SO. TAKES 30 SECONDS.

Or the Wall. Remember that Wall the Mexico was gonna pay for? It's going to be paid for by "taxing imports" from Mexico. You know who will pay the increase in prices? Lemme give you a hint- NOT MEXICO.

Or repealing the ACA. Those of you who thought it would be fine because they're repealing Obamacare and not YOUR ACA plan? Holy crap, man...and they have nothing to replace it with. And they won't.

Just like we'll never see Trump's tax returns. Why the HELL are you giving him a pass on that??? Fun exercise- every time Trump does or says something, pretend it's Obama or Hillary saying it and see if you'd be OK with that.

Or that lovely rollback of the law that makes it difficult for people who have been diagnosed with severe mental issues to get a gun. EVERY ONE of my "gun nut" friends says that was the stupidest thing they ever heard of. I said, "Then you, as gun nuts, need to say something" and they said, "I did! I gave 'em a piece of my mind in the gun forum!"

Ummm...Bubba? That ain't gonna cut it. Yer gonna have to step out of your bubble, or bunker, or church, or wherever the hell you hole up at, and PAY FUCKING ATTENTION. And then when you see the new guy screw up? YOU need to call him out and set him straight. YOU. Not us. YOU.

Because this is YOUR dog you just put up there, and he's shitting all over the Constitution you claim to love.

Be adults. Don't double-down on insanity when (not if) you see something in the new administration that you disagree with. We don't want to see anyone suffer- even you. WHEN you see something not right and you speak up about it, we will think MORE of you, not less. I mean, we'll still say, "I fucking told you so" a few times, but we're just human, right? For the sake of your kids and grandkids- being bullheaded because you don't want to admit you were wrong is just not worth it.

And the rest of us will still fight every regressive, awful thing he or his minions (all Swamp Monsters so far, in case you missed that part)put out there. We will watch every move they make. Because this shit is kind of important.

And it should be to you, too.

 lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-52553524490130149292017-01-21T10:00:00.000-06:002017-01-21T10:00:10.112-06:00Day OneSo I'm here in Denton on the day after the inauguration. I'm going to the Women's Rally on the Square at noon, along with my beloved Sisterchicks here...and my son, who will be going with all HIS friends, male or female. And hopefully a few thousand others. Gomez volunteered to stay home to take care of the farm so I could come do this, something that gains him even extra points because I know damn well he would've liked to participate as well.

I was a little bit nauseated yesterday, a malady that I'm pretty sure didn't evolve into full-on puking only because I refused to watch the "festivities" in DC. It was more interesting to hear it from other people's eyes.

Conservatives said it was the best thing since angels declared the coming of Jesus to shepherds in the night and DC was filled to the brim with REAL Americans hollering their allegiance to their new savior. This isn't a stretch- a lot of these folks claim that Donald J. Trump- serial philanderer, ethics-free businessman and all around bigot, racist and misogynist...is God's way of "Taking Back America". I always knew their version of God was a vengeful, hateful prick, but COME ON. In and around all that pompous circumstance, we were told, again, that we need to "all come together" and "give him a chance". Sorry. I can't come together with racism, nationalism, isolationism, oligarchy, police states and dealing lethal financial and legal blows to people and things that can't fight back. I'm funny that way.

Liberals said his inauguration speech(as the London Times said) "painted a grim picture of an America only he can rebuild". So he apparently took his base- who voted for him out of fear anyway, and reiterated that their fear is warranted, their hatred and suspicion of anyone not "exactly like themselves" is sensible and logical and that this nation is SO BAD, SO FAR GONE, that the only one- out of all of us Americans in high and low places and with education and compassion and intelligence and an abiding LOVE for OUR nation---only HE can fix it. Well, isn't that special? Anyone who has been in an abusive relationship can tell you that's how they keep you there. Your fear and dislike of the abuser is overshadowed by the fear of what will happen to you if you leave- how much WORSE it is "out there" and how other people will treat you WORSE because "only I know what you need and only I REALLY love you". And there were like 5 Bikers for Trump who showed up, looking like a pitiful wall of meat. I guess a wall of Vienna Sausages? And the parade was sparsely-attended. And they are using stock photos of OTHER inaugurations to make it look like DC was brim-full of patriots!

Yes, Melania looked lovely. I have nothing against Melania Trump. Barron looked miserable and it was noted that no one- no one in the Trump family, reached out to take his hand or put a hand on his shoulder. I didn't see it, remember. But if that's true, it's very sad. I heard a bit of the announcing and it's apparent that the guy was an MMA announcer. How fucking classy. My son said that the official photo shoot at the Lincoln Memorial- all in black and white and surrounded by military holding flags, was quite reminiscent of official dictatorship photos...

The protests. Here's my take. And the take from people who I know and who were there. It was worse than hoped for but better than being shown. Lots of stock footage of other protest violence in other places, like there usually are when it's expedient for the masses to hate people who are fighting for THEM. My answer to a conservative who sneered, "Yes- we hated Obama and protested and carried signs...but we never DESTROYED anything" was to say, "Hey- I can't help it liberals are better at EVERYTHING than ya'll are." She said, "Wait. That was almost funny..." Was it right for people to set a limo on fire? Nope. Wasn't right for the police to pepper spray (hose-like) an old lady AND a little kid, either. And don't say, "Well, they shouldn't have been there!" because fuck that. This is America, remember?

I was hoping beyond hope that during the final handshakes, Joe Biden would kidney-punch Trump and just keep walking.

OK. I am now duty-bound to go read the transcript. I cannot see that face or hear that voice without retching, and I will read it in his voice ANYWAY, but I have coffee and hopefully will not vomit. Be right back...

(Interlude of "Muskrat Love" elevator music)

What the hell. I'ma just copy/paste it here and let you know what I think about it as I read it.

"Chief Justice Roberts, President Carter, President Clinton, President Bush, President Obama, fellow Americans and people of the world, thank you.
We, the citizens of America, are now joined in a great national effort to rebuild our country and restore its promise for all of our people.
Together, we will determine the course of America and the world for many, many years to come. We will face challenges. We will confront hardships. But we will get the job done.

Well, that just reinforces the Right's claim that "Obama did nothing and tried his best to destroy America right there.

Every four years we gather on these steps to carry out the orderly and peaceful transfer of power.
And we are grateful to President Obama and first lady Michelle Obama for their gracious aid throughout this transition.
They have been magnificent.
Thank you.

I had an employee once. Briefly. Every time I would ask him to do something he would say, "Yes, Ma'am." But the tone of his voice told me he was really thinking "fuck you". That's how this "Thank you" to Obama sounds, especially after the opening statement. He's literally DISMISSING the former president of the United States.

Today's ceremony, however, has a very special meaning because today we are not merely transferring power from one administration to another or from one party to another, but we are transferring power from Washington, D.C., and giving it back to you, the people.
For too long, a small group in our nation's capital has reaped the rewards of government while the people have bore the cost. Washington flourished, but the people did not share in its wealth. Politicians prospered but the jobs left and the factories closed.
The establishment protected itself, but not the citizens of our country. Their victories have not been your victories. Their triumphs have not been your triumphs. And while they celebrated in our nation's capital, there was little to celebrate for struggling families all across our land.
That all changes starting right here and right now, because this moment is your moment.
It belongs to you.
It belongs to everyone gathered here today and everyone watching all across America.
This is your day.
This is your celebration.
And this, the United States of America, is your country.
What truly matters is not which party controls our government, but whether our government is controlled by the people.
January 20th, 2017, will be remembered as the day the people became the rulers of this nation again.

What the literal fuck. Sure the pols in DC got rich. Yanno why? Because people like Donald J Trump PAY THEM to pass laws that only protect the RICH- the pols don't get tax breaks and decide to move business out of the country- the CORPORATE OWNER RAT BASTARD WEASELS DO.

The forgotten men and women of our country will be forgotten no longer. Everyone is listening to you now. You came by the tens of millions to become part of a historic movement, the likes of which the world has never seen before.
At the center of this movement is a crucial conviction that a nation exists to serve its citizens. Americans want great schools for their children, safe neighborhoods for their families and good jobs for themselves.
These are just and reasonable demands of righteous people and a righteous public.

...and people like YOU, sir, are why we don't have that. Also, that little detail about how you lost the popular vote by 3 million and only half of registered voters bothered to get off their asses and vote. You won because the electoral college put you up there, and more of the electors went rogue AGAINST YOU than in any other time in history. Never forget that.

But for too many of our citizens, a different reality exists.
Mothers and children trapped in poverty in our inner cities, rusted out factories scattered like tombstones across the landscape of our nation.
An education system flush with cash but which leaves our young and beautiful students deprived of all knowledge.
And the crime and the gangs and the drugs that have stolen too many lives and robbed our country of so much unrealized potential.

BECAUSE OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU, YOU CLUELESS, SMUG BASTARD

This American carnage stops right here and stops right now.
We are one nation, and their pain is our pain.
Their dreams are our dreams, and their success will be our success. We share one heart, one home and one glorious destiny.
The oath of office I take today is an oath of allegiance to all Americans.

Yes. Of course. Say what you need to to keep the children quiet and pliant while you molest the crap out of them. Say the pretty words and they will believe it even tho historically it's YOU who have caused the most pain and damage.

For many decades we've enriched foreign industry at the expense of American industry, subsidized the armies of other countries while allowing for the very sad depletion of our military.
We've defended other nations' borders while refusing to defend our own. And we've spent trillions and trillions of dollars overseas while America's infrastructure has fallen into disrepair and decay.
We've made other countries rich while the wealth, strength and confidence of our country has dissipated over the horizon.
One by one, the factories shuttered and left our shores with not even a thought about the millions and millions of American workers that were left behind.
The wealth of our middle class has been ripped from their homes and then redistributed all across the world. But that is the past, and now we are looking only to the future.

Yes. The military contractors like Cheney and the rich assholes like yourself who do "business" overseas have gotten very wealthy. You really think we believe you will do anything about that? You've promised to throw MORE money at the military. "American workers left behind"? YOU BUILD YOUR SHITTY CRAP OVERSEAS AND HAVE NOT MADE ONE MOVE TO BRING ANY OF THOSE JOBS HOME. YOU BANK OVERSEAS. WHAT THE FUCK?

We assembled here today are issuing a new decree to be heard in every city, in every foreign capital and in every hall of power. From this day forward, a new vision will govern our land.
From this day forward, it's going to be only America first, America first. Every decision on trade, on taxes, on immigration, on foreign affairs will be made to benefit American workers and American families. We must protect our borders from the ravages of other countries making our product, stealing our companies and destroying our jobs.
Protection will lead to great prosperity and strength. I will fight for you with every breath in my body, and I will never ever let you down.
America will start winning again, winning like never before.

Protectionism, isolationism, nationalism. That's how abusers get you. Make you believe that they are only thinking of YOUR well-being and ISOLATE you from other people and ideas. Isolation is the main tool of the abuser. The main tool.

We will bring back our jobs. Great. You closing your factories in "Jina" and Mexico?

We will bring back our borders. Where did they go? What a ridiculous thing to say.

We will bring back our wealth, and we will bring back our dreams. So you're going to bank here again, too? OUTSTANDING

We will build new roads and highways and bridges and airports and tunnels and railways all across our wonderful nation. ...after getting rid of any minimum wage at all, right? So we can afford to do that if we are paying people $2.00 an hour.

We will get our people off of welfare and back to work, rebuilding our country with American hands and American labor. ...by getting rid of social safety nets. I guess that's one way to do it.

We will follow two simple rules: Buy American and hire American. You first, asshole.

We will seek friendship and goodwill with the nations of the world, but we do so with the understanding that it is the right of all nations to put their own interests first. Ah, yes. Friends with benefits but no real commitment.

We do not seek to impose our way of life on anyone, but rather to let it shine as an example.
We will shine for everyone to follow. You realize not everyone wants to BE American, right? Because other places are also pretty great. What an ignorant, boorish thing to say. "We will be a GREAT example for the rest of this shithole of a planet!"

We will re-enforce old alliances and form new ones and unite the civilized world against radical Islamic terrorism, which we will eradicate completely from the face of the earth. How? Your very attitude towards 'those brown people' and vow to (continue and escalate) bombing the shit out of them MAKE MORE TERRORISTS, YOU STUPID PRICK.

At the bedrock of our politics will be a total allegiance to the United States of America, and through our loyalty to our country we will rediscover our loyalty to each other.
When you open your heart to patriotism, there is no room for prejudice. Your version of "patriotism" is what BREEDS prejudice.

The Bible tells us how good and pleasant it is when God's people live together in unity. We must speak our minds openly, debate our disagreements honestly, but always pursue solidarity. When America is united, America is totally unstoppable. There should be no fear. We are protected and we will always be protected. We will be protected by the great men and women of our military and law enforcement. And most importantly, we will be protected by God. OH, BROTHER. Has this guy even read the Constitution? WE ARE NOT A THEOCRACY. I'll bet this got the biggest cheer from the assembled masses, tho...ESPECIALLY his "prayer warriors"

Finally, we must think big and dream even bigger. Wait. He missed a chance to say BIGLY? In America, we understand that a nation is only living as long as it is striving. We will no longer accept politicians who are all talk and no action, constantly complaining but never doing anything about it.
The time for empty talk is over. Now arrives the hour of action. Ummm...the only way to get things done quickly are illegal as hell. Our nation has a set of rules to govern by that are on purpose convoluted and lengthy. It is frustrating but prevents a DICTATORSHIP from forming. I hope it holds up to this because this is the biggest wall of bullshit and razzle dazzle that has ever come up against it.

Do not allow anyone to tell you that it cannot be done. No challenge can match the heart and fight and spirit of America. We will not fail. Our country will thrive and prosper again. You just told us how crappy and awful it is. YOU'RE the one who's been telling us it's totally fucked for over a year now. So yes. We WILL thrive and prosper again. As soon as we get your ass OUT of there.

We stand at the birth of a new millennium, ready to unlock the mysteries of space, to free the earth from the miseries of disease, and to harness the energies, industries and technologies of tomorrow. What? We're 17 years into the new millennium and you sound like a cross between George Jetson and a snake oil salesmen.

A new national pride will stir ourselves, lift our sights and heal our divisions. Oooh oooh oooh- did he pass out brown shirts at this juncture? It's time to remember that old wisdom our soldiers will never forget, that whether we are black or brown or white, we all bleed the same red blood of patriots. Unless you're a chick soldier. Then you're just a distraction and asking to be raped, like you've said in the past.

We all enjoy the same glorious freedoms and we all salute the same great American flag. ...unless you're gay, or a minority, or female, or an atheist or a liberal, right? I mean...let's not get all CRAZY here. And the flag is a symbol, not what we worship or fight for. Our soliders are fighting for America, not the cloth symbol of it. Because that would be idolatry, and your God sort of frowns on that.

And whether a child is born in the urban sprawl of Detroit or the windswept plains of Nebraska, they look up at the same night sky, they fill their heart with the same dreams and they are infused with the breath of life by the same almighty creator. And if they are born rich, they don't have to worry about shit, right? When their daddy gives them a "small gift" of a million dollars at their high school graduation...you forgot to mention those kids. You literally have no fucking idea of how 99% of the kids in this nation live, do you?

So to all Americans in every city near and far, small and large, from mountain to mountain, from ocean to ocean, hear these words: You will never be ignored again. Your voice, your hopes and your dreams will define our American destiny. And your courage and goodness and love will forever guide us along the way.
Together we will make America strong again, we will make America wealthy again, we will make America proud again, we will make America safe again.
And, yes, together we will make America great again. More pretty words to suck in the victims. Note it's all "again". Note that most of it is already great. We have the largest most badass military the world has ever seen. We have more billionaires and more income inequality than any country- you think he's for changing THAT ratio? Most Americans are DAMN proud and we love our nation fiercely- that's why we're protesting YOUR election. Safe? Great! You're for gun control! That'll go down well in Red America...

Thank you.
God bless you.
And God bless America."

I'm glad I didn't watch it. I would've broken the TV.

So even without watching it, here's what I dreamt last night.

I was here in Denton, but when we got here, the house next door had been moved. It was taking up our driveway, had eliminated our garage and there was a new fence making half of our yard their yard.

I knocked on the door and asked them about it. They said they had just bought the house and had had it moved to where it now was. I said that there was some mistake and they needed to call the city and get a survey because they were clearly taking up a big chunk of OUR property- so much that we couldn't park in the driveway anymore and had no garage anymore at all.

They laughed and said that they could do whatever they wanted to do because they were REAL Dentonites and that if we didn't like it we should just move somewhere else.

Welcome to Trumpfuckistan.

I'd better get a shower. I have a rally to attend. I'm old and tired but goddammit, this shit WILL be watched, it WILL be protested, and it WILL be gotten thru to the other side.

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-15225839569365738262017-01-18T08:30:00.000-06:002017-01-18T08:30:32.667-06:00The Day 18% of America Cheered Our Demise- Inauguration 2017You may have noticed that I haven't said much since the election of our soon-to-be wannabe King of the World by a full and rousing 18% of the registered voters of this country.

Am I not pissed? Of course I am.

Am I not disgusted with the entire shitshow of smug disdainful ignorance he shows every time he opens his clueless, spoiled, entitled piehole? Sure.

I'm not full of "sour grapes" because my "side" lost.

Yes, I voted for Hillary, but remember I was (and still am) a Bernie fan first and foremost.

Of course I've spent a fair amount of time saying, "See what you voted for? Thanks for tanking America, Patriots! Only an imbecile takes the fox out of the henhouse and lets a hawk loose in there and says, "Hey- hawks are birds and chickens are birds. I'm sure the hawk will only have the chickens' welfare at heart! He understands EXACTLY what the chickens need! Let's just give that hawk a chance- don't be a hater till we see what he does!" Spoiler alert- I don't need to wait for it. I know what's coming. And so did you, if you're honest with yourself.

You voted to "drain the swamp" and put the guy in charge who has been FUNDING both sides of the swamp for decades- HE TOLD US THAT AT A DEBATE.

You voted for someone who will work for "the little guy" and put the guy in charge who has be screwing over little guys to the tune of 3,000+ lawsuits and a bogus university his ENTIRE LIFE.

You voted for "financial integrity and acumen" and put the guy in charge who has filed for bankruptcy half a dozen times and refuses to show his tax returns (yes he can release them mid-audit- the IRS said that A YEAR AGO and yes he did say he would release them if he became the NOMINEE and he hasn't). The guy started out rich. You and I? IF we get a chance to own our own business, we have ONE chance because we don't have a rich daddy who will bail us out over and over and over and OVER again when we fuck it up.

You voted to "Make America Great Again" (which has always angered me- it's already pretty great, you pompous, bloated, make-your-crappy-merchandise-in-China-or-Mexico borrow-money-from-foreign-banks asshole) and put the guy in charge who spent his entire campaign telling us which AMERICANS we need to squash- the black ones, the brown ones, the liberal ones, the women ("Treat 'em like shit", "Grab 'em by the pussy", "If she weren't my daughter, I'd be dating her"...) and who cheated on BOTH of his FIRST TWO wives. COME ON. Just...COME ON.

You put in charge the guy who is treating being the leader of OUR NATION like a side gig. He's keeping his businesses. He's not spent one minute learning jack shit about diplomacy or how things actually work in DC and I'm not talking about "the swamp" part, I'm talking about little things like how our Founders set up our nation and the rules and steps of how it's supposed to work. He doesn't care. You have basically said, "I need brain surgery. I think I'll have my auto mechanic do it because he'll use fresh eyes and ideas instead of that stuffy old surgeon who has been indoctrinated with all that book-learnin'!"

You put in charge the guy who is filling his administration with people who want to destroy (not improve on) the very things they will be in charge of.

And the GOP will LOVE it until they push thru all their formerly-thwarted agenda: repeal (and replace with NOTHING- he keeps saying it will be repealed/replaced the same day and even the same HOUR---WITH WHAT??? It took YEARS to put together Obamacare- it's not like ordering a fucking PIZZA for Chrissake) Obamacare, privatizing everything from schools to social security, elimination of Medicare and all social safety net programs, reversal of EVERY civil rights battle we've won (only decades after the rest of the world but HEY, WHATEVER, RIGHT?)...and then they will find a way to impeach his ass because he's CLUELESS as to how anything works up there. He is the useful stooge for the GOP. They will put up with his ridiculous persona and his infantile tweeting and his banty-rooster posturing and his empty yet sincere-sounding promising of things THEY ARE ALREADY TAKING AWAY and then they will dismiss him like the useful tool in a suit that he is.

But that's not what currently worries me.

Inauguration is day after tomorrow and I'm seeing articles about how many security people will be there to "protect" our incoming POTUS. Not just secret service. Military and police and self-proclaimed mercenaries (Bikers 4 Trump) and even "Prayer Warriors" (?) who will protect our incoming POTUS.

What the literal fuck?

What the hell is going to happen Friday?

No other incoming POTUS of any stripe (or color) has had that. And if anyone needed it, from the calls for his death if he won...Obama needed it.

Fun thought exercise- if your guy LOST the popular vote by almost 3 MILLION votes and is so disliked, so vile, to MOST of the American citizens that he needs to be protected by tens of thousands of armed guards on inauguration day and people are going to be PROTESTING his coming into power in marches all over the US including DC---imagine if that were happening anywhere else in the WORLD- the US would be sending troops to protect the CITIZENS from an incoming dictator.

Now imagine that this incoming guy is ONLY lauded worldwide by the leaders of North Korea, Russia and the Philippines and he has denounced his own nation's security and intelligence agencies and press/media and has put in places of power military men and his own relatives after losing the popular vote in his nation by millions of votes.

What would the US do? I mean...normally...

This is a guy who has spent his whole life promoting himself and trying to be the "best rich guy out there". He's not been very good at it. Most of the other rich guys don't like him. The only people who like him are those who can be dazzled by his bullshit. He can't do anything without slapping his damn name on it in huge letters. He's admitted that he doesn't build THINGS- he sells a brand.

The head of the National Guard becomes unemployed in the middle of Friday's ceremony, leaving THAT contingent of armed protectors suddenly leaderless. Every US Ambassador has been told to be out of their office and home and on a plane back to the US Friday (guess only Barron Trump gets the luxury of staying in his school till the year is over), leaving our country with zero ambassadors worldwide.

Putin is his hero. Putin is the richest man in the world and he got there by raping his own nation (legally or quasi-legally or by intimidation, whatever worked...) and TRUMP WANTS THAT. He wants to learn how to do that and he's there now. Right there. With one tiny hand on our national checkbook and the other on the Red Button.

No, my friends, this is not "sour grapes" you're hearing from your FELLOW AMERICANS, it's sheer abject terror at what YOU willingly, knowingly unleashed on OUR nation and our children and old people and marginalized people and FUCK IT anyone who is not so goddamn rich they can just whisk off to one of their OTHER houses in ANOTHER country and live off their OTHER money stashed safely away from the smouldering ruins of what is coming after Donald Fucking Trump is done with his pissing match with Putin over who is the "richest man in the world".

"He's not even sworn in yet- give him a chance. Simmer down. Maybe it'll be great!"

Nope. He TOLD us what he was going to do. His 75 years on this earth SHOWED us who he is. He spent over a year saying things that NONE of you would allow or tolerate from your husbands, brothers, sons, friends...

And you fucking pulled the lever for him.

Tens of thousands of armed guards for the inauguration?

What the hell is going to happen Friday?

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-61281023240537255772016-11-28T19:30:00.000-06:002016-11-28T19:30:40.338-06:00Wishful ThinkingOK. I'ma get this off my chest first thing.

What the hell, America? I cannot fathom how we could elect Donald Trump as our president. Cannot. Fathom.

Set aside the obvious for a sec. The horrible things he says on a daily basis, the absolute horrors he's looking at to put in his administration, the blatant nepotism and general disregard for the office he said he wanted. Set that aside. Oh, and set aside the hellacious violence-instigating campaign he just ran. Just...set that all aside.

Here were our choices, and think, for a sec, that you are interviewing candidates for an actual job. Because that's what a campaign is, ya'll. The world's longest and most mind-numbingly expensive job interview.

On the one hand you have a woman who has roughly four decades of experience. During that time she racked up an impressive amount of accomplishments, but she also had some blunders. Because we're talking FORTY YEARS and she's, yanno, human. The only person who's done that much time in community service without any blunders would be Bernie Sanders but we can't have a SOCIALIST NOW, CAN WE?

Ahem.

On the other hand, there's this guy with zero experience. He says he has plans but won't tell you what they are. He says he's a great businessman but won't show us his financial records. So, weighing all this...you chose this guy. Well done, America. You should never ever be in charge of human resources EVER.

But that's why we have the electoral college, right? To make damn sure a blithering idiot never makes it into office, right? How did THAT work out for us?

We need to get rid of the electoral college, and I'm not just saying that because "my side" lost. It's archaic and not necessary. We have the world of information at our fingertips and YES, the states that have the most people absolutely should have more say in who is our POTUS if we are really one person/one vote. The rural states should NOT have untoward advantages in this, because frankly, they have no clue what the urban areas NEED, just like the urban areas shouldn't ignore and ridicule what rural areas need. We already have one branch of government that's skewed to give all states "equal weight" and that's the freaking Senate where Utah gets 2 senators and California gets...2 senators. See? There's your "equal treatment".

So, ditch the electoral college and let the people actually choose who they want for POTUS since
a) unless the electoral college does something unheard of (but this entire election cycle has been rife with that shit), we are stuck with Agent Orange as our POTUS so they aren't going to even do what they are supposed to do this time around
b) a big reason we even have the electoral college was so that the less populous states at the time (insert SLAVE-OWNING states because slaves couldn't vote) were able to toss their weight around and keep their way of life which was wrong then and even more wrong now

And here's how to fix some of our seemingly terminal division in this nation. Used to be that actual moderates from both sides would run for office and say crazy things like, "And if elected, I will do my best to work with the (other side) for the good of all the American people" and people would ELECT them instead of calling them RINO's, DINO's and traitors. WEIRD, HUH?

So we're totally divided now and there may as well be alligator-infested moats in that aisle they used to cross all the time.

We need to tweak our leadership just a smidge.

Both sides still choose a candidate for POTUS and a running mate.

Whoever wins the popular vote gets to be POTUS.

Whoever gets the 2nd most votes gets to be VP.

If something happens and the POTUS or VP can't fulfill their duties, their running mate steps up, keeping the party representation in place.

That's it. Simple.

Because MOST of the time, the election isn't 90% voting for one guy and 10% voting for the other guy. This time it's like 2% difference. It was less than 10% difference when it was Obama/Romney. So you have literally almost half your voters all pissed off after the election and the other half screaming, "HA! IN YOUR FACE! GET TO THE BACK OF THE BUS!" which is not helpful for a harmonious national attitude.

MAKE 'em work together. Right at the top of the heap. THAT'S one "trickle-down" that actually has a chance in hell of working.

Seriously, ya'll. Do I have to think of everything?

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-79252862267755162132016-11-14T14:47:00.000-06:002016-11-14T14:47:24.008-06:00Let Me 'Splain Something to You, AmericaWhy are people so upset? So they lost the election- why don't they just get over it. What a bunch of whiny baby losers...

Because that's not it at all. At All. Losing the election is something that happens all the time. What we've just invited into our lives is a completely different animal.

People who have done no fact-checking for three decades over any GOP contrived Hillary-gate and done no fact-checking for eight years of Obama's presidency have just watched a man spew out awful hateful things about AMERICAN citizens for over a year. I watched it. Everyone watched it. We couldn't help it. He was on the damn "liberal bias" media 24/7/365 for fuck's sake.

They've watched and cheered as this lying sack of shit urped up lie after lie so quickly fact-checkers had strokes, but every single one was brought out in the open as a lie in quick order. Every single one. And they didn't care. They voted for him anyway.

No- not all were low-information voters. Not all were racist or misogynistic. But every single one was able to disregard his vile invective and vote either FOR him, or against Hillary. Every single one.

The "never Hillary" voters held their noses and voted for this overtly and upright in your face racist, blundering, mean, huckster because...shit they heard Hillary did but was never convicted of- over and over and over again. And instead of saying, "Hey- she wasn't convicted. Guess it's not as big a deal as we thought" they instead went with the guy who's been involved in over 3,000 lawsuits and excuse it away by saying, "Well, that's what happens when you're a successful businessman." (Hint- NO. NO IT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENS UNLESS YOU'RE A SLIMY-ASS BASTARD OF A BUSINESSMAN.)

I get it. She wasn't perfect. She's not as flashy, clever or charming as Obama. She's not as pushy, vain and confident as Trump. She had an air of "entitlement" to the presidency that turned a lot of people off.

And now this is what we have. He's already surrounding himself with the most "conservative" people on the planet to help him run our country. Dangerous, punitive, selfish and greedy people. He's already walking back everything he made you cheer about- the wall, repealing Obamacare, overturning gay marriage---every one of his pretty promises that were what made Fundamental America hold their nose and vote for him- he's not going to do. SURPRISE!

We've heard the word "trigger" a lot since he's been running for office. Women who have survived abusive relationships are actually triggered into panic attacks just by the sound of his voice and the tone of his words and how he holds himself.

So here's the 'splainin' part:

You start dating someone. It's great. They have a good job and money and say they are successful.

During the dating process, sure some things you don't agree on. He's a little too quick to lose his temper. A little too pushy. Tells a few racist and off-color jokes and expects everyone around him to laugh.

But he's got that good job and tells you he'll take care of you and you'll never have to worry about money again.

Things turn uglier as you and he intertwine your lives more and more. He's still saying the pretty things (especially in public) but at home he's meaner, shorter-tempered. He may even slap you once or twice...in frustration he says. He's sorry. It won't happen again.

Alarm bells go off in your head and you talk to other women you trust- your mom or a close friend and they say, "But he's so successful and handsome. I'm sure he's just really stressed out at work. Try to be patient."

One day he takes out a big ol' diamond ring and asks you to marry him. Every awful thing he's ever said and done crash around in your head and scream, "DON'T DO IT! RUN!" But the ring...and the lifestyle...and the promises that you just KNOW he'll keep...if only you're patient and a good wife.

It'll be fine and everything will be great.

So you say "yes". You go into that voting booth and vote for Trump.

And now- less than a week from the election and over two months from him even getting sworn in, he's already walked back on the best of what he promised you, and is lining up for his old friends and cronies- to make THEIR lives better. Not yours. His and theirs.

Except it's too late, America. You have chosen the bad boyfriend and you can't divorce him.

The reason we're angry is because in spite of his entire campaign rhetoric, in spite of his dismal record as a businessman (it's not a success if you hock everything to build something else, cheat your sub-contractors out of their pay, and make sure that your finances are set up so that if it all goes tits-up you will escape unscathed), you voted for him. You said "yes".

And now that it's too late to say "no", you're telling us to "give him a chance". "Let's see what he does." "Maybe it'll turn out GREAT!"

No. No it won't.

Because just like the bad boyfriend, he's already shown us what and who he is and now that he's the president that's not going to change.

Just like the bad boyfriend, what we saw during the campaign was DATING BEHAVIOR- he was on his BEST behavior trying to woo your vote.

Now that we're hitched to a Trump presidency, he can let his guard down and be himself. He doesn't have to be NICE anymore.

Get it? The awful things we listened to and that triggered us all for over a year? THAT WAS TRUMP ON HIS BEST BEHAVIOR.

And now if you'll excuse me, I need to breathe into a paper sack and take some benadryl for my hives.lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-13167364690320884532016-11-09T17:27:00.000-06:002016-11-09T17:27:47.020-06:00Flabbergasted...No, that's not exactly right. I'm not flabbergasted and not sad. I'm pissed off but not for the reasons you may think I am.

My family and I watched till the bitter end about 2am. We couldn't help it- it was like watching the world's biggest car wreck in slow motion.

I went from, "She's got this but it won't be by much, and how embarrassing is THAT?" to

"Just wait till NY and CA total up- she'll get the electoral vote" to

"Holy fucking shit. What the hell is WRONG with us?"

But I was strangely calm. While friends and acquaintances recorded crying, being sick to their stomachs, being afraid and mostly of all angry...so very angry, for whatever reason all I could think of was, "Of course. What else did we expect?"

And I told my husband and son and a dear friend that we'd figure out what we needed to in order to keep us all safe and we went to bed.

This morning I shed tears twice- once at a post my daughter (my conservative daughter) made about how women will ALWAYS have to try harder while undergoing more scrutiny than any man and once when my friend told me he loves me.

And the resignation I felt last night has turned into cold, long-lasting anger.

You need to understand that that's my survival mode. When nothing else gets me thru something that needs to be gone thru to get to the other side, anger will always do it. Anger will always be there for me. Anger has always given me the will to be brave and the tenacity to hang on.

It's not hot and volatile. It's cold and steadfast. And it can last as long as I need it to.

Say...four to eight years. Longer if necessary.

But here's the thing. I'm not angry at who and what you think I am.

I honestly think Donald Trump had no fucking idea he'd win. That's why he had no actual plans set, no key advisors he could name. In his head this was a reality show that ended yesterday and today he'd be moving onto his next project. He had no clue what he's unleashed in the basest of American character and has shown zero actual desire to learn the job he's been applying for for over a year.

So other than his being a clueless, selfish, entitled asshole, I'm not angry at Trump.

I'm not mad at his voters. I honestly think they (90% or better of them anyway) voted for him as a "protest vote" to shake things up in DC- send 'em a message. They really thought Hillary would win and they could bitch and moan about the election being rigged. Today they are as stunned as anyone else INCLUDING TRUMP HIMSELF.

I'm angry at a system that has produced an electorate who is
-clueless as to how things are supposed to actually work
-so desperate for change that they are willing to burn the whole thing down to get it instead of yanno...just not voting for pricks and getting some real honest moderates in office

I'm angry because obviously as a people, we feel so helpless and angry that we will do anything at all just to prove we are still capable of doing something even if that something will destroy us.

I've been married three times. The first two were bad marriages. The second one specifically because he was an abusive drunken asshole.

Here's a thing about abuse. It's complicated. It's easy to say, "NO IT'S NOT- GET YOUR ASS OUT OF THERE!" but until you are tits deep in it, you don't understand. MOST of the time there's something the abuser plays on- your love, your sympathy, your desire to "fix" them...something, and they may not even realize they are doing it because their childhood was so fucked up and they may realize it but can't care enough to change because their own demons are eating them alive.

Justified or not- this man felt victimized his entire life. Abusive childhood. Drinking and drugs. Lots of in and out of jail and mental hospitals. He could be "normal" and charming but not for long. He was too damaged. But he was normal and charming just long enough to catch my heart and stuff it in his pocket.

After one of his many arrests, the officers tossed him into the holding cell- hands still duct-taped behind his back (he was a struggler). He realized he could reach into his back pocket and grab his cigarette lighter.

He'd been arrested (for, in his head, unfair reasons) and was outwardly helpless to do anything that affected his own life.

Except.

He grabbed his lighter and lit himself on fire.

The officers just watched him for a minute before putting him out because it was clearly a dumbfuck thing to do.

But it was all he was capable of doing to prove his autonomy at the time.

Now, imagine yourself as Trump Voter America. Trump promises you that he and ONLY he can fix everything that's wrong with your life. You KNOW that's bullshit. You KNOW that he can't deliver even a tiny fraction of his promises. You know that.

But you vote for him anyway. Because the ones up in DC aren't listening to you (in your eyes) and you want to do something that will get their attention.

Even if you set yourself on fire.

That'll show 'em.

America has for full and true set itself on fire. And I'm angry that we're so shell-shocked as a people that we can't see beyond our own helplessness. We work harder and longer than people almost anywhere else for less pay and with less of a social safety net, but we run like horses back into a burning barn when someone hollers "SOCIALISM!"

I'm angry that we have reached a point that fully half of the citizens who bothered to vote consciously thought, "Fuck it. Burn it to the ground."

How long can I stay angry? Long enough to make sure none of those I love get caught in the fallout.

Long enough to try to protect anyone within my reach who is going to be hurt by what's coming- even and especially those who sowed what we will all now reap.

Long enough.

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-16772868788965638962016-11-05T12:07:00.000-05:002016-11-05T12:07:10.655-05:00Once Upon a Time......the super-fundamental conservative Christians (SFCC for short) in America prayed to God for a great leader. "Oh, God. Give us a leader we and our children can look up to. We know you are in charge and trust your Will. Amen."

God said, "Yea, verily my Children. I give you Barack Obama and his family. He and his wife are of humble beginnings but both worked hard and are highly educated- Barack as a Constitutional scholar. They have two adorable girls who don't get into trouble and are a joy to be around. They are eminently the epitome of your 'American Dream' come true. How's THAT for inspiring?"

The collective SFCC- "..................................................NO GOD- NOT LIKE THAT! Don't you SEE? He's a Muslim, Kenyan, trasher of the Constitution who wants to DESTROY America! He's also probably gay and his 'wife' is really a MAN. The kids look like chimps- LOOKIT THIS MEME! We have on good authority that all this is true because those who are telling us are both in the pulpit AND HAVE YOU TUBE CHANNELS. YOU TUBE CHANNELS. Surely you're mistaken. Please send us the correct person at your earliest convenience. Thanks, God. No hard feelings. Amen."

The GOP- "Listen, God. It's not your fault. Hang tight- WE know what they mean." (trots out Trump)

AND THE SFCC GOES WILD WITH JOY AND PROCLAIMS TRUMP 'THE ANNOINTED ONE'

God- "................................................whatever, dudes. I'll just be over here, chillin' with the gorillas and dolphins. You people are why we can't have nice things."

The End. Possibly literally.

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-73659410422313844122016-10-08T01:05:00.000-05:002016-10-08T01:05:58.827-05:00"Border"line InsanitySo my friend Carla and I drove from Austin to San Diego (actually Del Mar) yesterday and today. From Austin it's a route that skirts along the wee north side of our border with our neighbors to the South---the dreaded Mexican border.

We saw no teeming masses of rapists and murderers swarming across it.

There was no impenetrable wall.

It's a horrible, endless, festering and depressing starkly beautiful yet lonesome area of deserts and mountains.

There were, however, checkpoints.

Three of them, to be exact.

When we approached the first one, my mind raced at all the things we could be questioned for, and I ticked off every one in my head.

-There were 18 guinea pigs in the car- guinea pigs don't get rabies so don't need health certificates to travel across state lines

-There was a baggie of cut up carrots and 6 apples in the car, so if they asked about fresh fruit and veggies we could just hand those over

-There may have been a partially consumed bottle of Rumchata in the back seat...

The entire car is filled with our luggage, the guinea pigs' supplies including several 40 pound bags of bedding, and 8 or 9 carriers---some with pigs and some without...yet.

So we steeled ourselves for the obviously inevitable search of our vehicle.

We approached the checkpoint, noting the nine armed agents and the super-enthusiastic German Shepherd. There was a dog who looked at every working day as THE BEST DAY EVER. Carla said, "He's going to eat the pigs."

Finally at the front of the line, we rolled down the window as the agent peered into the car. "Are you American citizens?" he asked. "Ummm...yes. Yes, we are."

"OK- you ladies have a great day."

...and we proceeded on our way, noting the vehicles that had been pulled over for further searching- every one with a driver who was...browner than we are.

I should have been relieved that we didn't have to unpack and repack all our shit or set our pigs out in the sun or open our suitcases to reveal our middle-aged chick clothes and daily supplies.

But I was unaccountably pissed off. Really, really pissed off.

"What the hell??? How did he know we're not running drugs???" I fumed.

"What kind of moron would say, "No- I'm NOT a citizen?" Carla added.

"Seriously- we could have had drugs in the suitcases, drugs under the pigs in their trays, drugs tucked into the middle of the bags of pine shavings to mask the smell!!! WE COULD BE DANGEROUS, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" <<< Me- but you already knew that.

Just then Ward called. "Hey, Caramia! Where are you?" And he got the recap of what you just read.

At the end of it, I added, "That was bullshit! Just because we're two middle-aged chicks we get a pass? If I were running drugs, I'D SEND THEM WITH ME BECAUSE I DON'T LOOK DANGEROUS. Maybe I'll start running drugs..."

"Ummm...I'd rather you didn't" Ward said in his calm and rational way.

He really is the only thing that keeps the world safe from me. lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-69253068466491161842016-10-03T07:45:00.000-05:002016-10-03T07:45:12.012-05:00Ahhh...Rested and ReadySo I leave day after tomorrow for ten days. I leave. Not we. For the first time in over two decades, I'll be going away for more than a weekend and Ward's not coming with me. For the first time in almost that long, I'll be going away for more than a weekend and Alec's not coming with me.It will be the longest time we'll be apart and I'm coming home on a Friday afternoon...after they leave for Denton for two days, so it'll be an addition three days without seeing them.

I'm going with friends to (don't laugh) the ARBA convention. American Rabbit Breeders' Association because that is, confusingly enough, also one of the big shows of the year for guinea pigs and I have 4 I'm bringing to the big show. Two friends are flying, another friend and I will be driving all the pigs across the desert Southwest and ending up in Del Mar CA. Two hella long days of driving across the desert with heat-sensitive rodents that are the pinnacle specimens of all our respective rodent-breeding endeavors, four days of stinking like rabbit pee from the 100,000 rabbits that will be there, competing against the other 800 guinea pigs that will be there, spending time with other friends from all over the nation, delivering pigs I've sold and picking up pigs I've bought (this is a hub for being able to get bloodlines you otherwise can't get without putting them on an airplane- and the prime example of my friend Cathy's husband's assessment that guinea pigs are really just furry little trading cards) and then driving back home thru that self-same desert in two days. It's going to be a blast. And I'm not kidding. OK, now you may laugh.

The point is...I need to be rested. I worked late last night, got home about 11ish, had dinner and was in bed by 1am. Not bad. I'm good on 6 solid hours and I get up at 7am. Today and tomorrow will be busier than yesterday as I prepare home and work for my absence and the pigs for their moment in the spotlight. Yes. Baths will come into play along with tiny little pedicures.

Making lists is the main thing I'll do today- packing lists for me, the pigs (food and bedding to keep changes to a minimum during the outlandish ten days they'll be enduring with their usual good humor), shopping lists, lists of what I'll need to bring to cook for friends while there...lists.

Bed at 1am and fell promptly asleep as I do. And I can stay blissfully asleep as long as nothing bothers me and alerts my "mom ears".

2:15am Bonnie starts whining in a rhythmic weird way...like she does when she forgot to pee when we let them out a mere two hours previously. I'm on the other side of the house. Surely Boy will hear her- she's right next to his head.

2:30am Get up and let Bonnie out. Turn around and there's Sorcha- "Oh. Bonnie gets to go out but I don't?" Let Sorcha out.

3am Let Bonnie and Sorcha in because they are barking at invisible nocturnal squirrels.

3:30am Realize out of a dead sleep that HEY! Yanno what would be GREAT on this trip? AUDIO BOOKS! If I order them NOW they'll probably be here before Wednesday morning!!! Grab my phone to find audio books that will be here by Wednesday. Books ordered. I have no fucking idea what they are. Golly I hope they're good.

4:15am Ward gets up to pee.

4:30am Dammit, now *I* have to pee.

5:45am Fizzgig gets hiccups so mighty the entire king sized bed weighed down by two humans, 100 pounds-worth of dogs and a geriatric cat still vibrates from them.

6:15am Sirius starts grooming himself under the covers and up against my back with that oddly disgusting sucking noise he makes.

Annnnnddddd...I'm up.

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-59109060792034334092016-09-11T11:31:00.001-05:002016-09-11T11:33:43.415-05:00Selective Memory and OutrageThe 15th Anniversary of 9/11.

And we replay it over and over and over today on a loop of horror that never ends.

That one day.

That one day that 3,000 Americans were killed on American soil.

It's awful because it had never happened before, and it hasn't happened since.

It should never have happened.

No one should have to wonder if today is the day they will die...while at work. Or at school. Or anywhere else that should not be dangerous.

We replay it over and over again in a loop of horror that never ends.

"How DARE they attack us on our own sacred soil?"

Totally ignoring hundreds of thousands of people who leave their homes EVERY DAY wondering if they will return, who close their eyes EVERY NIGHT wondering of they will open them in the morning. People who are afraid of *US*, of our troops, our drones, our "allies" who WE arm. Every single day. On their own soil.

Hospitals bombed with patients and doctors inside.

Schools obliterated with students and teachers inside.

Children who are afraid of birds because...drones.

Young people and old people who turn to lives as terrorists because it's really all they have left- everything and everyone else they ever loved is blown up or dead or both.

When will it end?

That endless loop of horror?

Never.

It will never end as long as we only give weight and matter to our suffering and none at all to the suffering we cause in "retaliation".

It will never end as long as we can justify our violence while deploring and punishing the violence of others.

With more violence.

Bigger violence.

"Better" violence.

Calls to "make our military strong AGAIN" when we are already the biggest, most horrific killing machine ever known to human society. Ever.

So we ignore the carnage we're causing every single day and revel in the knowledge that we'll be bigger, better, more strong...the behemoth of fear and bullying that proves how compassionate and freedom-loving we are.

And the loop of horror plays over and over and over again...

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-42245381078007177322016-08-30T22:59:00.000-05:002016-08-30T22:59:34.220-05:00Dream a Little Dream...So Fizzgig got out of the house yesterday. Flew out the door when I opened it and disappeared across the field. Since we all have sort of a love/hate relationship with the darling scruffy cuddly yappy little land shark, our reaction was a mild, "Shit. Oh, well" and we carried on with our morning. About an hour later, she was back on the deck waiting to be let in- covered in burrs and literal shit, so she got a bath.

Last night, we went to bed about midnight and about two-ish were woken up by Fizzgig. She was licking Ward's face and wagging in my face and when we woke up she went and laid back down. She did it again at about three. At four she curled up next to my tummy like she does and went to sleep. After a few minutes she started paddling and making little dog noises-she was dreaming. I have no idea what she did or saw while in "the wilderness" but it clearly gave her nightmares.

So from four till six I was wide awake. I hate that. About six I finally dropped back off to sleep and as is usually the case...that's when you get the most bizarre dreams.

Dreams are great. All sorts of weird shit can happen in dreams and your sleeping self takes them all in stride. Perfectly normal.

Therefore, it was puzzling to the point of alarming when my dream self looked down into my dream lap and said, "Why the hell is there a baby rhino in my lap?"

It wasn't a fantastical rhino- no mythical being of odd yet shimmering colors. This was just a run-of-the-mill ordinary baby rhino. In my lap. Looking up at me in a sort of cross-eyed manner. Probably from looking at his tiny little stub of a horn.

My dream self had stuff to do. I was aware that I needed to check on loved ones, I had responsibilities to attend to and places to go- none in a DANGER DANGER WILL ROBINSON manner and there was no aura of malice or fear in my dream; I just had a lot of things to do.

So I carried on, in the rain, driving and walking and doing the things that needed doing...with a baby rhino draped over me.

I worked my way through everything I needed to, except one part of the dream where I had to go to Oklahoma and there was a border wall in my way. They wouldn't let me into Oklahoma. Because of the rhino and all. So I didn't go to Oklahoma. Anywhere that doesn't accept baby rhinos isn't worth going to anyway (a sentiment I hold in my waking moments as well).

Relaying the above dream to the boys this morning, I realized that everything I've been trying to do lately- from home to hobby to work to health has had me running in seventy-leven directions for the last several months without letting up.

Last night, one of my bosses gave me an affirmative answer to a request I'd made with one caveat- he needed me to do him a favor that would require more of my time. And that. That right there. Was. The. Baby. Rhino.

"Oh, you've ferried your family to a million doctors' appointments in several different cities?"

"You've navigated the footwork and initial research to set up not one, but two brand new departments at work (one of which requires coordination with two additional and separate community entities)?"

"You survived one of the most drama-filled and aggravating weeks of your 20+ years on the job, human-resource-wise?"

"Outstanding! NOW DO IT ALL WITH A FREAKING RHINO IN YOUR LAP!"

Done. And I shall name him Paul. After that one boss...

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-13711918901348642672016-08-07T15:05:00.001-05:002016-08-07T15:05:27.469-05:00In the Unlikely Event of...That's what your airline host or hostess says.

They stand in front of you and smile reassuringly, stressing that you'll probably get to where you're going just fine. But just in case of an "unlikely event" there's oxygen masks and flotation devices and other things that really won't help at all if you're plummeting from thousands of feet in the air towards Earth.

Anyhoo.

We've been thinking about this election. And how the outcome may affect our family. Directly. Affect. Our. Family. Because if we end up with a President Trump (or similar) and all health care (including Medicare) ends up in the private sector, that's not acceptable and could be deadly. So for the first time in my almost 60 years, I'm looking outside the US for places to live.

Alec and his friends are already looking at Europe to go to college. I spent some time looking at Uruguay for the weather and its out-of-the-way location and its services and affordability. And I downloaded Duolingo for Spanish so I'm all set, right?

Here's the kicker and what gives me pause. It's really far away. Like..."you can't drive there" far away. And it's crazy expensive to fly there even IF I weren't paralyzingly horribly terrified of flying. You can fly to Denmark and back several times for one trip to Uruguay.

And then in a recent conversation, there it was. The Answer.

Remember when we went up to Washington state a few years ago and I said someday we WILL move there? Because the people, the climate and OH MY STARS the rainforest?

Washington state is smack-dab shoved up next to...Canada and ITS section of the same damn geography and climate!

Vancouver Island.

So I started looking (thank you, Hawaii via Toronto Jordan)and even chatted with a realtor up yonder. He asked when we'd be interested in making the move. I said, "Round about the second week of November---right after our election." He laughed and said, "Ya- you guys have a pretty crazy one going on, right?" I made sure he knew that we are NOT on the Trump-wagon and he seemed surprised and said, "Ummm...don't MOST people feel that way?" No. No they don't, Mr. Sensible Canadian Realtor.

I assumed that rural Vancouver Island would be pretty comparable to rural western Washington- still pretty spendy.

I assumed wrong. Oh, sure there are really expensive places that are close-into Vancouver or Victoria or on rocky promontories overlooking the ocean...but most are actually within reach of someone like us, especially someone like us who WANT to be out of the way and rustic.

So I'm looking at places on the northern third of Vancouver Island and found one on the Cape Scott Trail- the road that crosses the island from east to west and connects Port Hardy to the Cape Scott Provincial Park. It's gorgeous. The big trees, ferns, water, mountains, mosses...it's right there.

Ward said, "If it's on the road...the ONLY road to the park, it's gonna be really busy during the summer." He was thinking of that self-same trip when we did Yosemite, Grand Canyon and Arches- winding our way along bumper to bumper two lane park roads for literally hours before actually entering the parks. We're so used to doing things "off-season" with the freedom of home-schooling schedules, that crowded parks were a real and unusual annoyance and Ward and Alec voiced that often and until I had us stop for lunch one day (in July) in Death Valley National Park. We found a picnic table right away! And they never mentioned how crowded the other parks were again!

So I pulled up the flyer for the Cape Scott Provincial Park and immediately noticed a few things.

-I was reminded that every Canadian I know is sensible, easy-going and has a wicked sense of humor

-No. That's it. And that's enough.

Excerpts from the OFFICIAL provincial park flyer.

Under "Points of Interest" (Those things in US parks that highlight battles won, landmark discoveries, etc...)

As you hike along the trails and beaches of the park, watch for some of the following natural and cultural history points of interest:
9. Breakwater- the remains of an old sailing vessel sunk as a breakwater. Unfortunately it did not survive winter storms and was soon washed ashore.
10. Wooden cart- Located in a meadow off the north side of the trail near Spencer farm. Alfred Spencer farmed here till 1956
11. Caterpiller tractor- The first motorized machine used at Cape Scott is lodged between two trees on the north side of the trail.
19. Driftwood fence posts- Remains of a driftwood fence running east-west behind Guise Bay. Built by NP Jensen in 1910 in an attempt to stabilize the sand dunes for pasture.

And my favorite---

20. Cougar trap- in the sandneck is a wood a-frame structure used as a cougar trap by the Jensen children. A cougar was captured and held for 10 minutes much to the surprise of the children. (I'LL BET!)

Every single one is testament to how much puny humans suck next to Mother Nature. Our attempt at a breakwater? The ocean laughs. Albert Spencer thought he could FARM here? The wilderness kicked his ass so good he just up and left his CART for criminy's sake. So the humans brought a MACHINE to help them conquer the forest...and the forest grabbed ahold of it and hasn't let loose of it yet. Jensen wanted to make PASTURE out of BEACH? Not likely then and not likely now. And the only thing that would've been better than #20 is if #21 had been "Jensen family burial plot- where the Jensen children were buried after the encounter with the cougar."

And I don't think Ward has to worry about traffic.

Under "Caution"

Persons contemplating a visit to Cape Scott Provincial Park are reminded that the park is a wilderness area without supplies or equipment of any kind. Most trails are primitive and very muddy. Hiking along the coastline can be dangerous. Holberg is the nearest settlement and visitors should be in possession of suitable maps.

Boil or treat all drinking water before consuming.

In case of emergency contact the RCMP in Port Hardy, the lighthouse station at Cape Scott or the Park facility operator at Nels Bight (MAY NOT ALWAYS BE THERE).

Not a gift shop or restaurant in sight, and damn few outhouses. I count seven in the entire park and only the one ranger station...which may or may not contain an actual ranger.

We'd already decided that when I'm able to retire, we'll be heading to the Pacific Northwest.

So, in the unlikely event that we need to Trumpvacuate...I'm downloading Duolingo Canadian today.

Photos of the actual property near the park. Can you stand it?

 lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-39642037226931556872016-07-31T11:52:00.003-05:002016-07-31T11:53:42.734-05:00The Art of the DealioOK, kids. Here's the dealio.

This is possibly the most fucked up election that *I* can remember, and I can remember a few. All the way back to 1980 when I voted for Reagan. Shut up. I was young, idealistic and stupid.

Here's what pisses me off about this one. We HAD a chance. We HAD a great candidate but we didn't vote for him. Oh, I did and prolly you did but not enough people did and he lost.

The conservatives didn't vote for him because they're so scared of the word "socialist" they pee their underpants when they hear it and their "news" sources have told them that it's all about FREE STUFF and then dying in death camps, neatly sweeping the many democratic socialist successful happy nations that are currently "suffering" from this malady under the Conservative Media rug.

The liberals didn't vote for him because they feel that it's Hillary's "turn". Fair enough. She's worked damn hard for decades and is eminently qualified for the position. Absolutely and completely.

She also has the expected baggage that goes with literally years in the spotlight. Most is bullshit. Some is true. Her stances on things have changed AS THE AMERICAN PUBLIC'S STANCES HAVE CHANGED and that's not flip-flopping- it's doing what your damn people WANT you to do so I'm not sure what the hell is the problem with THAT. Bernie didn't have this baggage for one reason.

He was never considered a threat to the conservative side OR the liberal side. Once he became NOTICED and wildly popular, the Right hauled out the spectre of socialism and the Left hollered FREE STUFF and sneered while making sure they fudged a little here and altered things a little there so it was a sure thing that he wouldn't win it. Both the RNC and the DNC just wanted him gone. So he's gone. He's not DEAD and he will continue to do what he's always done...yanno, back before MOST of his most vocal supporters were even BORN.

Ahh. the RNC and the DNC. I've said it before but apparently we need reminding often. The primaries mean NOTHING. Honestly, if the DNC had done NOTHING and Bernie won by a landslide they STILL didn't have to make him their candidate. Just like the RNC did NOT have to make Trump THEIR candidate. They didn't. But they did.

And here we are.

We have two realistic candidates left and our choice is to vote for one of them. Yes, there are multiple 3rd party candidates. Are they on the ticket in all 50 states? If not, they are not viable. They SHOULD HAVE DONE THE HOMEWORK AND FUNDRAISING TO DO SO WELL BEFORE ***NOW***. If they couldn't get even THAT done, how good a POTUS will they be?

If they ARE on the ballot in all 50 states (Gary Johnson) do you REALLY agree with EVERYTHING he stands for? Or are you just voting for him because you're pissed off at the other two? Do you realize that Gary Johnson would have exactly FUCK-ALL chance of getting ANYTHING done once elected? Good. Just checking.

I hate our two-party system. I hate that we don't have more viable choices. But you know who's fault that is and when something should have been done about it?

OUR FAULT AND FOUR YEARS AGO.

To come in here pissing and moaning about our lackluster CHOICES this time is bullshit. OWN THAT SHIT.

To say "It's all rigged and both parties are the same and both candidates are crooks" is cowardly, finger-pointing douchebaggery of the highest order. You know how it got that way? WE LET IT GET THAT WAY.

What can we do NOW? We are 100 days away from the election and either Clinton or Trump WILL be POTUS.

Those are our choices.

Clinton has baggage and a shit-ton of experience in how things work on The Hill and in foreign negotiations. She's had decades either in public office or actually working with and for the private sector INCLUDING those who couldn't hand her a fat check.

Trump has jack shit. The first office he's running for is POTUS. Does that not say something about his ego and narcissism? He brings out the very WORST of the American Spirit and feeds it. The RNC convention was horrifying. The things he yells at us are terrifying. Would you want this asshole to coach your little league team? Run the humane society in your town? Babysit your KIDS? Why on EARTH would you want him in charge of our NATION?

Oh. He's going to bring back jobs. Great. So he's already closed all his factories in China and Mexico? No?

He's going to be the Law and Order POTUS. Super. So all those lawsuits he's been party to (not the ones he brings on other people- the ones brought against HIM and that he's been found GUILTY of in courts of law almost MONTHLY for the last few decades- those ones) are going to stop now? No?

He's going to protect the morals of our blessed Christian nation and God will smile on us again? OUTSTANDING- guess he's closed all his strip clubs and casinos!!! Huh.

What the actual FUCK, America?

So here's the dealio.

I love Bernie Sanders with an almost unnatural zeal- and I have for almost THIRTY YEARS. Not the last year and a half. Three decades. It's laughable to me that the Right dredged up an article (satire, BTW) he wrote while he was in COLLEGE and held it up saying that he hates women while their Chosen One calls women fat pigs and worse every single day NOW. But I digress...

So here's the dealio.

If you write in Bernie Sanders he will NOT be POTUS. He won't, and trust me no one would be happier if that were an option but it's not. If you vote 3rd party your candidate will not win. IF I were to vote 3rd party, I'd be voting for Mimi Soltysik/Angela Walker because they Rock. They also said that to be true to their beliefs, if elected the first thing they would have to do is fire themselves.

CAN we change the system from within? Yes.

WILL it be fast and glorious? No.

It's going to take ALL of us getting up out of our chairs and DOING something from the day after the election till the next one---4 years. 1,460 days. Including weekends. How many of us can AFFORD to do that? How many of us have the TIME to do that?

Virtually none of us. Our system is beautifully set up to keep us working long hours for low pay to scrabble for our families. But here's a thing. Here's a thing you CAN endorse that will help and it's got Bernie's blessing and support.

http://brandnewcongress.org/home

But THIS presidential election is 100 days away. It will be virtually impossible to get it done THIS time. So THIS time, here's how I'm voting.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton.

I'm voting for the party platform that will do the LEAST harm to us in the next 4 years. Shit, the Republican Platform doesn't even sugar-coat anything; just states it's FOR exclusion, taking away rights hard won, and rampant discrimination of anyone not white and Christian. What the hell?

It's not "voting for the lesser evil" for criminy's sake. Thanks to Bernie, the Democratic platform is the most progressive it's EVER been in the history of Ever.

Let's talk cooking for a minute.

Say I want to make lasagne for my family tonight for dinner, but I go into my pantry and I don't have lasagne noodles or ricotta cheese or italian sausage or tomato sauce. I DO have elbow macaroni and cheddar cheese and pork chops and green beans. I also have Drano and Lysol cleaning spray and laundry detergent.

Do I throw a fit? Refuse to cook ANYTHING for dinner because what I have in front of me is not EXACTLY what I wanted? Turn on my family and holler at them for requiring FOOD AT ALL and stomp out of the house? FEED THEM A DRANO/LYSOL/LAUNDRY DETERGENT CASSEROLE EVEN THO I HAVE THE MAKINGS OF A PERFECTLY FINE DINNER IN FRONT OF ME???

No. I don't. I feed them macaroni and cheese, pork chops and green beans and make damn sure I have lasagne ingredients on my list for NEXT TIME I go to the store.

Honestly. Sometimes I just don't know what to do with some of ya'll.
lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-12012923057632332422016-05-24T14:37:00.002-05:002016-05-24T14:37:38.476-05:00Living Liberal in East Texas- VotingSo I voted today.

Walked into our tiny precinct for the primary run-off election and there were the two tables- one marked Republican and one marked Democrat.

The lady at the Republican table asked me how I was voting and I pointed to the Democrat table lady.

There was an instantaneous air of shock in the room. "Really?" the three elderly ladies (honestly not older than me) looked at me with heads cocked to one side, like they were trying to get me into focus. I spun around as gracefully as my pear-shape allows but think I pulled it off pretty well thanks to my colorful sari skirt and hippie-braided rainbow hair, finishing off with a flourish of arms in the air.

"Are you sure? You know there's only one thing on that ballot- there are LOTS of things to vote for on the Republican ballot."

I said, "I can vote Republican even if I'm a Democrat?"

"Sure! You can vote however you like!" *sweet smile*

Wait a second. "How many Democrats have voted here today?"

The lady at the D table hesitated and said, "Well...none. I don't usually do this (her badge said she's really one of our municipal judges) and they told me I wouldn't have to do anything but sit in the chair all day- I don't even know what to do."

I really, really wanted to vote against that idiotic dangerous old bat Mary Lou "Obama was a gay prostitute to pay for his drugs" Bruhner as head of the state school board. Really. It would've meant me voting R today. Just today. The ladies at the R table beckoned- smiling, waving that ballot with her name on it...

NOT TODAY.

I made the lady at the D table learn how to check someone in, saying, "Ya'll must've been expecting me- when I first moved here 20-plus years ago, they didn't even have a person in that chair- it was a potted plant." *Nervous laughter*

I took my voting machine code from the young man who was probably fulfilling some sort of community service civics thing- high school age, MAYBE college age. This was, I'm positive, the most excitement he'd seen all day.

So I voted Democrat and in the Athens paper when they list the election totals by party there will show TWO STINKING DEMOCRATS VOTED IN BROWNSBORO---including Ward, who is voting later today. It shall not show that Brownsboro TX voted 100% Red. Shall. Not.

I told the lady at the D table that my husband would be in, and to remember how to check him in. I told them all that in two years our son will be voting Democrat, too.

On my way out the door, I took one more spin and said, "Yep! We're taking over!" and the laughter stopped.

The young man smiled, winked and gave me a quick, secretive thumbs-up.

Can't blame him, really. He's stuck there till 7pm with three actual dinosaurs.

Change is comin', darlin'. One crazy old rainbow-haired hippie at a time.

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-31844228816778849702016-01-02T10:33:00.000-06:002016-01-02T10:33:38.585-06:00Well, This is Awkward

So this came across my path yesterday with a notation that it just might be me. And I chuckled. But then I realized that it all fits except the 'awkward' part.

Oh, I still DO awkward shit- I haven't reached some magical age where I'm suddenly all grace and serenity because there's no danger of THAT happening EVER.

But here's the thing.

I just don't care anymore.

I'm extremely difficult to embarrass, and that's totally OK. The people WITH me may be embarrassed by the things I do and say sometimes, but yanno---so not my problem.

It's a new year and I'm going into it with realistic expectations about myself and what I will and won't do with it.

I need to lose about 20 pounds. I know I do because I'm not fit anymore. If I could carry this extree baggage on my ass and gut and still get around and not be completely stiff and stove up all the time that'd be different but I can't. I hate like hell when I scootch behind something and my ass bumps into a wall or piece of furniture and BY GAWD I KNOW I USED TO FIT IN THERE. So my resolution is to eat less. Yep. Pretty rad, I know. 99% of the time when I'm eating I'll get about halfway thru with something and think, "I'm not hungry anymore" but there's SOME LEFT so I eat it. I'ma stop doing that. I know I'll be throwing away some food and that's a Mom Sin of the highest order but it'll STILL be cheaper than any 'diet plan' I could go on. So there's that.

I need to drink more water. This is a tough one because it'll also make me pee more and I already pee way too much and with increasing lack of control. TMI? Probably. Remember tho---I no longer give a shit :) If I drink more water, I'll be less stiff because it's freaking WATER and will help lube up my old joints. I hate feeling like Edna at 90+ moved with less trouble than I do at 56.

So those are my two big resolutions. Eat less. Drink more water.

Will they give me the perfect body of a 30 year old? Nope. I'm not 30 years old anymore and wouldn't be 30 years old again for anything. I really WAS awkward in my 30's . I cared about everything- was I a good enough wife? Lover? Mother? Employee?

I'm good enough. I've gotten up every morning for over 50 years and done the best I knew how to do with the knowledge and resources I had. Every damn day. I'm good enough.

This body has grown 3 human beings inside of it successfully and has the road wear to prove it. It also carts around my brain and has done so for over half a century. That's a powerful burden right there.

My goal is not to be perfect, or even 'attractive'. My goal is to tweak and maintain this corpse so it'll carry my brain around for another four decades or so with moderate grace and acceptable presence.

My goal is to be here for my family, my friends, and all those people who depend on me and who even like me some of the time.

It's a worthy and attainable goal.

Oh, and no worries. Even if I'm not awkward, I'll still be foul-mouthed and sarcastic. And delightful. Always, always delightful...

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-50259119850404971142015-12-11T08:59:00.000-06:002015-12-11T08:59:45.106-06:00It's All Going According to the PlanHang onto your hats, kids. Come the first of the year, we're gonna see the ACA do some fine imploding. Oh, there are several fronts this will happen on, but lemme share the one that'll get me up close and personal.

I'm for the ACA and what it stands for. I was and still am thrilled that millions of people who were considered 'uninsurable' before are now covered. I understand that this is a big country and some compromise had to be worked into it in order for it to pass.

At the time, I was really squidgy about two things that were compromised away---

-The lack of a public OPTION

-The lack of comprehensive regulations against the insurance companies

The ACA, AS ORIGINALLY WRITTEN, would have had a public option- open enrollment Medicare for all who wanted it. Not FORCED to get it- anyone who wanted it INSTEAD of private insurers. This would have given the private insurance companies true competition instead of handing them a lovely gift of millions of customers who wouldn't pay for insurance unless they were compelled to- say by a tax penalty if they didn't. That part stayed in, and the new customers were handed to the private insurers like the Best Christmas Ever.

But they took out the public option to the wailing of the GOP who said it smacked of socialism, communism, fascism, every ism you can throw at something to make it look bad when it's really an outstandingly good idea. Ya- both parties now work for their corporate owners, but the GOP is hands-down much more open and serious about it. The insurance companies didn't WANT true competition, and certainly not from MEDICARE, which is the BIGGEST INSURER IN THE NATION and runs on a lean 4% margin instead of their cushy and profitable 35%. Because while Medicare is not a BUSINESS, they are- it's their job to make money for their investors and stock holders and to do that you have- large margins and profits which are made when you- take in way more than you pay out which happens when- you raise premiums and deny claims- which they do ALL THE TIME- nothing personal- it's just BUSINESS.

This is why something like people's lives should NEVER be at the mercy of the free market. Ever. Nothing personal- it's just business.

Now, there WERE some regulations that stayed intact and they have been very good for people- millions of people.

- you cannot be denied insurance due to pre-existing conditions. (You can, however, be charged out the ass for it)

- you can stay on your parents' insurance till you're 26 (as long as you're also in college, which is a whole NUTHER huge expense)

- insurance companies MUST spend 80% of the premiums you pay them on your actual medical care or refund the difference. We actually do get back a check from BCBS every year in the neighborhood of about $30. WHEEEEEEE doggies.

No regulations against the insurance companies becoming monolithic giants who would corner individual markets. No regulations against how high premiums could go. Those were gutted out of there because you cannot hamper and hobble the free market- just give them all those new customers and they'll do the right thing by them. *wink wink*

When the healthcare.gov marketplace opened up, Texas had three different insurers you could choose from.

***Because remember, kids- there's no such thing as 'Obamacare insurance'. You can't buy Obamacare brand insurance any more than you can buy a Travelocity brand hotel room. You go to to Healthcare.gov and choose from PRIVATE INSURANCE COMPANIES- Blue Cross, Humana, Aetna...like you go to Travelocity and choose from Marriott, Motel 6 or LaQuinta.

Last year there were two in Texas and this year? One. Blue Cross has the entire Texas market for individuals buying off the marketplace. That's not a marketplace- it's a corner on the market.

So individuals can 'choose' from one provider.

Also new this year---individual plans do NOT include any PPO's. None. Zip. Zero.

Also new this year---Blue Cross is discontinuing some individual plans already in existence and those people have to choose from one of the marketplace HMO's. Unsurprisingly- the discontinued plans are PPO's. Unsurprisingly- they are targeting the people most likely to, yanno, use insurance.

Alec's individual plan? Good to go- he can keep his PPO.

Myself and a friend of mine? Discontinued. Choose a new HMO.

Alec is young, male, and healthy. I'm over 55 and female and my friend is female in 'child-bearing years'. Not difficult to figure that out.

The reason given is that all the new people they were FORCED to take have driven up costs and they just can't afford to, you know, provide health care for people anymore the way they had been doing. Which is ridiculous considering every national health care company logged RECORD PROFITS LAST YEAR BECAUSE OF ALL THE NEW HEALTHY PEOPLE WHO SIGNED UP AND WHO ARE OBVIOUSLY COVERING THE COSTS OF THE PRE-EXISTING CROWD AND THEN SOME.

So it's bullshit. They are raising premiums and cutting plans just because they can- just because it's good for their bottom line and that's not because they are evil, selfish rat bastard weasels, it's because we TRUSTED PRIVATE BUSINESS TO TAKE CARE OF PUBLIC INTERESTS, and it's their job---by definition---to make money.

It's a business' job to take in more than they pay out. Period. What that looks like in this case, in real life, is that thousands of people can no longer access places like MD Anderson, who will be out of network for them.

Every single person of a 'risk group' age who buys insurance individually will no longer be able to choose their doctor and that ain't the fault of 'Obamacare'- that's the dictate from your precious PRIVATE INSURERS.

If you are covered by a LARGE business' insurance plan---you can still have a PPO. If you're on Medicare or Medicaid---you're golden anywhere.

So Alec, Ward and Joe (who has both Medicare and VA) are good. If I get anything 'bad' between now and when I turn 62 and can access Medicare, I'm screwed.

So...

When the ACA implodes after the first of the year, you'll hear it broadcast far, wide and loud from the Right that 'THEY KNEW IT- THEY'VE BEEN WARNING US- THEY SHOULD'VE BEEN ALLOWED TO OVERTURN IT AND NOW LOOKIT THE BIG OL' MESS IT IS AND SEE HOW RIGHT THEY WERE!'

Just remember, it was THEM who made damn sure it would never work.

It was the GOP governors in EVERY RED STATE that made damn sure their own constituents suffered by rejecting the Medicaid expansion that would have covered anyone not poor enough to qualify for Medicaid but not rich enough to pay the outrageous private insurance company premiums.

We live in a corporatocracy, folks. They're not people and they don't give a rat's ass about individuals.

People die. Corporations don't die- they change leadership and go on. And on. And on.

We're being told that the insurance companies 'have to' cut plans because there are too many sick people they were forced to take care of. That's bullshit.

We're being told that social security and every single social safety net program will have to be cut or eliminated because our deficit is too high and they're unsustainable. That's bullshit.

We're being told we need 'austerity' to bring our country back to greatness. That's true.

The austerity should NOT be coming from the bottom, though- taking from those (US, people- they're talking about US) who can ill-afford to lose more, taken under the guise of , "Think of your children and grandchildren- sure, you'll feel the pinch a little, but it's going to be so much better for THEM!" THAT'S BULLSHIT. The only ones, ONLY ONES that'll be better for is those at the top.

Trickle down is a scam of the highest order.

HAS ANYONE YET SEEN ONE DAMN DROP OF IT??? No. And you won't.

They'll keep feinting throwing the ball and we keep running after it eagerly, joyfully, tongues lolling, looking confused while they laugh and bank our money. Over and over and over again.

No more.

I will NOT let them kill me, or my husband, or my son. Fuck that.

I'm not being dramatic- hundreds of thousands of people die in the US every year of TREATABLE THINGS. No one has to round us up and execute us. All they have to do is deny us access to health care.

If a Republican, ANY REPUBLICAN gains the presidency, we WILL see the dismantling of every social program including Social Security and Medicare. If that happens, my family will be gone. I've never stated or thought of leaving this country of my birth. I love America. I love my home with a fierce and abiding fervor. I love the IDEA of America as it can be.

But I will not let it kill us. Will not.

Oh, I know it'll look like we're 'just like' those Republicans who hollered, "If that Obama gets elected I'm OUTTA HERE! This ain't MY idea of America!!!" but it won't be anything like that at all. They were pissed that a black man had the balls to live in the White House. I'll be pissed that my husband won't be able to get the medical care he needs to stay alive and my son will be ripe for their fucking cannon fodder and I will not let either thing happen.

America needs to get its collective head out of its ass. Stop being so 'exceptionally' proud and ignorant and look around. We are increasingly violent at our own hands- not some foreign enemy that's mostly ginned up fear. And since when is it American to be so damn AFRAID? Our income disparity in this country is worse than in any other industrialized nation, bar none and we're celebrating that by giving those at the top our government, our money, our lives (both in our willingness to work for low pay in awful conditions for long hours thanks to Right to Work laws, and our willingness to accept less and less in the way of health care access, thanks to the flaws in the ACA) and happily doing so because 'some day, I could be rich, too!'

We need to stop being so stupid. Our government isn't working for us and that's not because it's 'too big' or 'Obama's a tyrant who shreds the constitution!'

NAME ME ONE THING HE'S DONE THAT'S UNCONSTITUTIONAL. ONE. NAME ME ONE THING THIS ADMINISTRATION HAS DONE THAT KILLS ANYONE OR HINDERS YOUR FREEDOM TO PURCHASE STUFF THAT CAN KILL OTHER PEOPLE. ONE.

Helpful hint---GETTING GAY MARRIED HASN'T KILLED ANYONE YET.

If our government isn't working anymore, it's because it's being run by those who don't care about it working for the masses (that's us). We don't need to 'take it back!' from the libruls/libtards/any other clever ignorant hate-mongering name for those currently in charge---we need to take it back from the corporations and banks who OWN IT.

The ACA is imploding by design. Not the original design, or the design that SHOULD HAVE passed- design by the corporate entities (that's the private insurance companies) who owned the politicians who hacked it to pieces and are now fixin' to get even richer off of the suffering and death of Americans.

And anyone who says, "Well, that's the way it is now and there's nothing I can do about it" can just kiss my ass and get out of the way.

Because I don't WANT to move, and I'll do everything in my power to make sure I don't have to in order to keep my family alive.

lunamotherhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-43695953307289472052015-12-02T12:07:00.000-06:002015-12-02T12:10:58.473-06:00The Blink of An EyeMy son and his friends are looking at Denmark. Or the Netherlands.

Not for a visit, but to move there.

I'd say, "I don't know how I feel about that" but it'd be a lie. I know exactly how I feel about that.

I'm excited at the youth and strength behind such a plan- I remember (not that I'm that old)having much the same thoughts as they do, albeit less farther-focused. My main thought was to get the hell out of Wisconsin. Took me a while, but I did it and have never looked back. Actually crossing the US border and staying across never occurred to me.

I'm proud that we've raised a human with such an independent bent. A free-thinker who knows more about current events and social issues, politics and world events than most adults do. Someone who loves his country but is not brainwashed to believe that the US is #1, that the US must remain #1 and that everyone on earth wants to be us and all other places are backwards shitholes. I'm proud as hell of that. He doesn't HATE America---there's a big ol' middle ground between screaming "We're #1!" while wearing a flag t-shirt and clutching an eagle by the throat... and yelling "Death to America!". Big. Ol'. Middle ground.

I'm terrified that once he boards a plane and is out of my Mama Bear reach, our economy and society will continue on the ungracious, unattractive and (unless something changes RADICALLY QUICKLY) inevitable sliding into the social squalor that is the morning after for all societies that become 'too big for their britches' and I'll never see him again. I do not believe we are in danger of a Mad Max No Food Zombie Apocalypse. But we're NOT #1 anymore, we never WERE the gloriousness of a Leave It to Beaver fictitious utopia, and we're looking like a B-film starlet after one too many cosmetic procedures in a frantic attempt to still look 21 at age 51 instead of...Katherine Hepburn at age 81- gorgeous and not giving a shit, just going about living life.

So it scares the hell out of me.

But then I realize...if we are (and we are)headed for an age of disgruntled frumpiness and depressed economics, still steered by bullheaded backwards financial initiatives and punitive social agendas...where does that put my son, as an American in America?

If he can get college-educated and come out of it with zero debt (and he can in Europe), if he can get a job that can support him and won't kill him with low pay and dangerous workplace conditions as well as short work weeks and hours (and he can in Europe), if he can have access to health care without paying almost 20% of his gross pay in premiums (you see where this is going...), then that's where he needs to be. That's where I WANT him to be.

Until the US gets its head out of its far-right, pseudo-religious, egotistical ass, the only place my son and others like him will have even a marginal shot at having a life that is the Norman Rockwell American Dream...is outside these borders.

And that's a fucking shame.

Last night my son was looking for a 'new' book to read- he'd just finished up the last of the Game of Thrones series and like his parents he HAS to have a book in front of him at all times. He was going through all the shelves in the house that hold a total of about a thousand books- very few fiction other than the 'classics'. He found a medical guide (huge old tome) that was 'new and revised' in 1905. He found a little book of PHOTOGRAPHS (it was capitalized just like that because PHOTOGRAPHS were such a new thing) from a 1800's World's Fair. He found a box of crystals and yak hair that'd been sent to him for his birthday half a dozen birthdays ago.

He looked around this log cabin and said, "Our house is full of weird shit." And he smiled.

The world is full of weird shit, son. Most of it delightful, intoxicating and smile-inducing. I'm so happy we've taught you that, and I hope you never forget it.

Step across the borders and grab the American Human Dream wherever you find it- for yourself, your friends, and all humans.

A blink of an eye ago, I was fifteen and eager to find my spot in the world. Now I'm watching my son do the same. My great-grandparents came to this country looking for a better life and the next two generations stayed put in Southern Wisconsin. I left and came to Texas and now my Texas-born is looking even farther afield.

He has his roots here in a log cabin in East Texas full of weird shit.

No telling where his wings will take him.

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-2548884643150397912.post-5055877518892788752015-11-15T17:04:00.002-06:002015-11-15T17:04:54.633-06:00Slogan Solutions: the Deadliness of The Easy FixThe Flat Tax

Slash Government Waste

Entitlement Society

Just Get a Job

Adoption Not Abortion

Trickle Down!

Make America Great Again!!!

Wipe Out the Terrorists

Show of Strength

Let Go and Let God

We are not encouraged to think critically. We are trained to listen to our elders, our leaders, our superiors, from the second we are born till the moment we die. Crowd control is really the basis of every single ideology- political or spiritual.

Crowd control.

Every ideology has its own goals and agendas and every one of them depends on getting the largest amount of people on your team. When there are small numbers of people involved, positive reinforcement works. Talk your team up, show people what works and how their life will be better if they sign on, positive reinforcement is a great way to individually affect lives and effect growth for your cause. One on one. One at a time. A solid foundation for the future of your goals.

But, damn that's so slow. It's slow and tedious and requires actually, you know...talking to people and living all the good parts of your philosophy your own self as an example. Whew, that's exhausting and honestly kind of boring.

Humans being mammals, and of a community (herd) persuasion, the one thing that gets everyone's attention and action in a heartbeat is fear. Good old fashioned Fear.

Fear of death, fear of attack, fear of privation, fear of eternal damnation...Fear.

Now here's the good part.

Just something that causes instantaneous panic- like an earthquake, or tornado, or Facebook going down for an hour---all that Fear needs to be directed at something to be effective. So we also need---An Enemy.

The Enemy has to be an entire demographic---something big enough to rally anOTHER entire demographic into action.

Liberals, Nazi's, blacks, gays, conservatives, women, men, Muslims, Christians, Jews, Japs, Spics, Yankees, Rebels, Educated Elites, Rednecks... every single group can be demonized and utilized by another one. If they look, talk or live differently than you ALL THE BETTER to make them seem less like you, like your family, less human.

Now you have Fear, and an Enemy. People are afraid, confused, possibly panicked, and looking for an answer, and they want it to be easy, and blunt, and seemingly air-tight. Enter the Slogan Solution.

They are astounding in their stark simplicity.

So we have our Slogan Solution, and we have an Enemy. It's so easy, especially if the topic is all twisty and gnarly and somewhat painful to consider---merely cave to the Slogan Solution and it'll all be better in no time.

Now the hard part.

Take any one of the slogans above and hold it in your hand. Turn it over and around and really consider-

-what is the real issue it's addressing?
-what caused or is causing that issue?
-what caused THOSE circumstances in the first place?
(I know- this is hard. Keep going.)
-what can we do to address the original issues- NOT what's in front of us now, but what caused it? Treating the cause of a disease instead of merely masking the symptoms, as it were.
-what can we do, going forward, to make sure those original causes aren't given the environment to thrive?

The operative word that should come out of every mouth when given a Slogan Solution is "HOW?"

How are you going to do this? What steps exactly will need to be taken and what's the toll it will take on all involved?

You may think that 'Let Go and Let God' doesn't fit with the rest, but it does, unless the same above steps are taken. If a situation is so hopeless that all you can say is 'let go and let God', you need to be damn sure you have already done YOUR OWN SELF everything possible to remedy that situation and that means going thru the above steps. Let go and let God at its finest is saying, "I have done everything I can and everything I know how in order to make this better. That's either good enough or it never will be."

Slogan Solutions are great things to throw around, to rally behind and to wave a flag or holy book to. Catchy, inspiring, seemingly completely sensible.

But what does it do to your Enemy? Remember, your Enemy is an entire demographic of mothers, fathers, children, families who are in reality all insidiously exactly like your own. No 'buts'. Exactly. Like. Your. Own.

So hold their feet to the fire, these Slogan Solution Spewers. Demand that they tell us HOW. Insist that they relate to us the cost in dollars and human lives.

Refuse to be blinded by the simplicity of an Easy Fix.

Don't live in Fear of the Fire.

Stop, drop and roll.

Stop being afraid.

Drop the big questions on the fear-mongers.

Roll over their sorry asses and support your fellow humans.

All of them.

lunamotherhttp://email@example.com