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17 November 2008
"Honesty" Without Truth?
mong the many words (and concepts) that have been deconstructed and redefined for these postmodern times is the idea of honesty.
You know: doubt is the new "humility"; free-thinking is the new "tolerance"; moral apathy is the new "charity"; and now querulousness is the new "honesty."
To the postmodern mind, "honesty" has come to mean the uninhibited venting of every egocentric feeling, every nagging doubt, every petty complaint, every subversive thought, and every negative passion. Maturity and discretion used to keep people from indiscriminately expressing certain potentially-destructive thoughts aloudmuch less broadcasting them to the world. In fact, a naturaland validsense of shame kept most of our ancestors from publishing detailed memoirs of their own crimes and misdemeanors for all the world to see (cf. Ephesians 5:12).
But nowadays you can blog a detailed account of your latest argument with your spouse; post it so that everyone from here to Timbuktu can read it; claim you are simply journaling a candid confessionbaring your very soul for the cathartic effect such unbridled candor brings; and then just luxuriate in the warmth of countless flattering comments from voyeurs who will enthusiastically congratulate you for your "refreshing honesty."
As if such "honesty" were in short supply these days.
There are forums in every corner of the Internet where people enthralled with that style of honesty go to exhibit the mischief in their brains for one another's benefit, and to enjoy one another's fulminations. You've got the pub-themed group blogs on the dark side of the Christian blogosphere, countless forums and e-mail lists that serve a similar purpose, and plenty of participants all around who are happy to reinforce one another's petulanceall in the name of transparency.
One of the best-known and most creative of these is PostSecret, a blog where people make grunge-art post-card "confessions" of their deepest, darkest secrets. (I would link to it, but frankly many of the confessions are too smutty to get a link from here.) I find "PostSecret" deeply disturbing. I'm especially amazed and appalled that so many people say they think it's "beautiful." Still, what really kills me is all the self-congratulatory braggadocio about "honesty" from people who like to make a pageant of their shame. How honest, really, is an anonymous "confession"?
In a similar way it turns my stomach when these quasi-Christian Internet forums populated by people who revel in doubt and dissidence give themselves kudos for their "honesty" while they are busy making a burlesque of the very idea of truth. And ditto when someone wants to pretend there's something extra-candid about smutty language.
See, the thing isreal honesty is about truth. And if your attitude toward truth ranges anywhere from angry contempt to blithe indifference, you don't get to pat yourself on the back for your "honesty," no matter how unrestrained or exhibitionistic you let yourself be with those things you'd probably be better off seeking private help for.
"A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back" (Proverbs 29:11).
41 comments:
- Willem Bronkhorst said...
Spot on, once again! Many of these "honest Christian pubcrawlers" are not honest enough, though, to come right out and confess openly that they have not believed the Word of God for a long time, if ever, while most of us can see this for ourselves without them saying so.
- 12:26 AM, November 17, 2008
- Andrew E. Courtis said...
This is very good Phil, I appreciate your comment near the end, "real honesty is about truth."
- 3:04 AM, November 17, 2008
- greglong said...
Or how about the site an Indiana megachurch put up to get traffic for its series based on "The Office" TV series: "myofficesecrets.com" (no longer available), where anyone could go to anonymously share their office secrets for all the world to see.
Thanks, Phil. Great post. - 4:08 AM, November 17, 2008
- J♥Yce Burrows said...
Appreciate this post in an Oprahization...or is that Springerization era? online and off. Never heard of PostSecret; would it be a negative to be out of such a lack of etiquette loop? Washington Post's Miss Manners would suggest a locked diary in the sock drawer ~ for the discreet person that wants to gossip about themself and others politely and without malice. Shameful.
Your last paragragh sums it up well. - 4:17 AM, November 17, 2008
- Kim said...
Hear hear, re your comments about PostSecret. Many of the young people in our church talk about this, and I was horrified by some of what I saw.
- 4:32 AM, November 17, 2008
Thanks Phil, my thoughts exactly. Real honesty is about truth.
- 4:34 AM, November 17, 2008
- donsands said...
"Maturity and discretion used to keep people from indiscriminately expressing certain potentially-destructive thoughts aloud—much less broadcasting them to the world."
Yep. Some people get a kick out of hanging their dirty laundry out for all to see.
Thanks for the good post. - 4:41 AM, November 17, 2008
- DJP said...
I aimed at this area in this series, but you did it far more concisely and memorably.
- 5:29 AM, November 17, 2008
- candy said...
How interesting that you should mention PostSecrets. My son just told me he bought a book in San Fran by Frank Warren, who put together PostSecrets. I had never heard of this until two days ago. My son loves the book and told me that one of the postcards inspired him to go see a therapist. Sigh. Such a shallow world that finds more meaning in random postcards than in the God of the universe.
- 5:37 AM, November 17, 2008
- James Scott Bell said...
Part of the problem (perhaps the major part) is the feminization of culture and the church. These bare all, emotion-led expositions come from the "just express your feelings" pop-psychobabble school of unisex utopianism. It used to be considered a manly virtue to fight against your baser instincts, to stand up for truth, and to restrain yourself from spilling every corner of your emotional drawer out onto the public table.
Life is hard and male headship was instituted to lead that fight. Take away the headship, indeed the whole idea of its validity, and you get an unwillingness to fight for truth and right conduct, an unwillingness that now infects the church. - 5:47 AM, November 17, 2008
- Matt said...
Wow. Johnny Dialectic, your thoughts are just as good as Phil's.
Great thoughts, Phil. I've often wondered how emergers can feign such indignation for dishonesty when their erosion of truth doesn't allow for as much.
Oh, and best graphic ever. The bowl, that is. - 5:59 AM, November 17, 2008
- Rick Frueh said...
Truth demands responsibility.
Uncertainty elicits more dialogue.
Honest uncertainty about core issues many times morphs into a self righteous aversion to arrive at truth. The uncertain round table is sometimes a self gratifying venue where committed truth is considered an obstacle to discourse.
The Words of Jesus were sometimes so offensive, so uncomfortably certain, that they took up stones to kill Him. Norman Vincent Peale would have been ashamed. - 6:12 AM, November 17, 2008
- Ben N said...
Nicely put, Phil!
Chesterton saw it coming: (all quotes are from his "Orthodoxy"):
"The meek do inherit the earth; but the modern skeptics are too meek even to claim their inheritance."
"The old humility was a spur that prevented a man from stopping; not a nail in his boot that prevented him from going on. For the old humility made a man doubtful about his efforts, which might make him work harder. But the new humility makes a man doubtful about his aims, which will make him stop working altogether. "
"We are on the road to producing a race of men too mentally modest to believe in the multiplication table. "
"Therefore the modern man in revolt has become practically useless for all purposes of revolt. By rebelling against everything he has lost his right to rebel against anything. "
"Thinking in isolation and with pride ends in being an idiot" - 6:17 AM, November 17, 2008
- Mark B. Hanson said...
Nicely chosen! Chesterton had the virtue of not being in step with his own "modern times", which makes him timeless. If only modern Christians would look away from their desire to speak to our age, and cultivate the more difficult passion of speaking to all ages. - 6:39 AM, November 17, 2008
- Chris H said...
It's heartbreaking that for all the "honesty" flowing, too few are honest about their need for the Christ of the Bible to forgive and redeem them from the things they're being "honest" about.
I will disagree with your blanket assertion regarding PostSecrets, though. As a professional working in the residence program of a secular university, and a minister to teenagers in my church, giving people an opportunity to be anonymous about their pain gives me an opportunity to minister with more direction. Many young people are bound to silence because they fear rejection; running a program like PostSecret allows them to speak up without being rejected - and gives me a window into the pain of the people I am ministering to.
Not a blanket support of the books, just an affirmation that there is something useful to it when applied to ministry, not simply enjoyed for entertainment. - 7:00 AM, November 17, 2008
- ff4Christ said...
Here is something I have been meditating on for some time: we live in a time in which there is no shame and yet pride is the greatest and foremost personality trait.
- 7:09 AM, November 17, 2008
- Solameanie said...
making a pageant of their shame. . .
And not only is it troubling that people post this stuff. It's very troubling to me that more don't see the inherent voyeurism in reading it.
I am waiting for the day when "Christian pornography" gets introduced as cathartic and acceptable. While that might seem like a snide joke, I'm half serious. They might well try it. - 8:03 AM, November 17, 2008
"A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back." - Proverbs 29:11, ESV
I have become more and more skeptical of these expressions of "confession" and "honesty" for many of the reasons you list here. While transparency, confession and honesty are all virtues and should be celebrated as such, they should not be sullied with vulgar and sensual manifestations whereby we justify our sinfulness and wallow in it.
Confession unaccompanied by repentance usually only acts to reinforce sinful behaviour. When all we do is confess, confess, confess, it normalises sinful behaviour, and often turns it into a means for acquiring attention and feeding the ego.
It's pretty basic group psychology... when it seems like everyone's doing it (insert sin here), no matter how wrong we may understand it to be, we'll feel in ourselves more freedom to transgress in the given manner if the group indulges it routinely, openly, and without retribution. Then again, I suppose that's the test of a believer's character, isn't it? Whether or not they'll abjure their sin, despite even a "Christian" society's acceptance of it. - 8:07 AM, November 17, 2008
- Even So... said...
In any event, confession is not repentance...
- 8:36 AM, November 17, 2008
- Phil Johnson said...
Bingo. I ought to have included that verse in the post. In fact, I think I will. - 9:25 AM, November 17, 2008
- CH said...
I wonder how much of a connection there is between Phil's post and Carl Trueman's post at Reformation 21 on the childishness of the culture.
Having spent quite a few years in the wasteland of youth ministry and teaching high school, I have seen a propensity to this type of "honesty."
But as Trueman and Phil both point out, the bigger problem is that this type of behavior has been adopted, and glorified, by the adults.
Postmodernism is quite literally a childish philosophy. - 9:36 AM, November 17, 2008
- Rachael Starke said...
This post also reminded me of Dan's series, and particularly this really helpful Spurgeon quote:
"I am the subject of depressions of spirit so fearful that I hope none of you ever get to such extremes of wretchedness as I go to, but I always get back again by this-I know I trust Christ. I have no reliance but in him, and if he falls I shall fall with him, but if he does not, I shall not. Because he lives, I shall live also, and I spring to my legs again and fight with my depressions of spirit and my down castings, and get the victory through it; and so may you do, and so you must, for there is no other way of escaping from it. In your most depressed seasons you are to get joy and peace through believing.
I'm getting ready to "share my testimony" (you know, the lady equivalent of preaching/teaching :) )at our women's Bible study this week, and have been praying particularly that it would really be a time of telling Christ's story, rather than my own. Thanks for the extremely helpful reminder, and warning, about how to make that so. - 10:18 AM, November 17, 2008
- bhuston said...
"To the postmodern mind, "honesty" has come to mean the uninhibited venting of every egocentric feeling, every nagging doubt, every petty complaint, every subversive thought, and every negative passion. Maturity and discretion used to keep people from indiscriminately expressing certain potentially-destructive thoughts aloud—much less broadcasting them to the world. In fact, a natural—and valid—sense of shame kept most of our ancestors from publishing detailed memoirs of their own crimes and misdemeanors for all the world to see (cf. Ephesians 5:12)."
Phil, I can hear the objections now. What about James 5:16's exhortation to confess your sins one to another? I say: Yeah, confess them, but do us the favor of adding just an ounce of true remorse and ownership of your sin. And is there a need to publish your sins in every graphic detail, almost romanticizing about how your sins are a kind of nobel expression of your own personal grapplings with the fallen human condition and your confessions are a transcendence out of that condition all on their own? This thing called sin is a not a beautiful tapestry woven together for you to explore, it's a thing to abhor.
Brad - 10:39 AM, November 17, 2008
- Mikey C said...
Obviously airing our own problems for the sake of 'honesty' is not good, but where is the line between this and trying to share our difficulties with others out of a genuine desire to overcome those issues or help others?
- 11:09 AM, November 17, 2008
- Mikey C said...
Ha ha! I just noticed the answer, I'm assuming repentance rather than just confession. Feel free to ignore me :-)
- 11:11 AM, November 17, 2008
- Solameanie said...
We also mustn't forget being "authentic." That is a much beloved word these days. Should I assume that all of this confessional handwringing is part of what it takes for authenticity?
- 1:05 PM, November 17, 2008
- rodwithoutareel said...
I think that honesty does have to do with the ability to share truth about your sins and need for repentance. And it's better to be honest about what you believe than pretending to believe it. blah
- 1:44 PM, November 17, 2008
- Andrew said...
It is amazing that in an age where there is so much "honesty" there is so little truth. Thanks for the post!
- 3:03 PM, November 17, 2008
- Caleb Kolstad said...
Great reminder!
- 3:05 PM, November 17, 2008
- FX Turk said...
There are more vile things than PostSecret on the internet. None of them, however, pretend to be virtuous -- and that's the nutshell problem with this sort of con fessional rubbish.
- 4:22 PM, November 17, 2008
- Live As If said...
Verbal vomit does not bring one praise or honor. At least none will come from one who fears God.
As God's word reads, "What the true proverb says has happened to them: 'The dog returns to its own vomit, and the sow, after washing herself, returns to wallow in the mire.'"
2Pe 2:22 ESV
Great, great points Phil, thank you. - 6:38 PM, November 17, 2008
- Susan said...
I see--so the main difference is in the repentance. That answers my question, y'all. I don't remember who said this (probably either Sproul Sr. or Robert Godfrey), but some sins are so shameful, they shouldn't even be mentioned (loose paraphrase). And Bootsandbibles really has a good point when he says that confession w/o repentance normalizes sinful behavior--it really does get worse when we keep talking about our sins as if they were some sort of trophies, rather than crying out to the Lord in our hearts for help.
(BTW, Phil, did you really take the time out and reproduce Munch's work with leftover ice cream?? Or is it just a play on words, i.e., we all "scream" for ice cream? Or maybe we're screaming because there is too much dirt confessed for our minds to consume!? In any case, it is interesting!) - 7:04 PM, November 17, 2008
- ~Mark said...
I was fooled for a short time years ago by two semi-Christian bloggers, whose open whining I took for struggling with their walk. It took all of a couple months for the posts to become of the quality of exposing an argument with your spouse but with them it seemed more to drag Christians down to their level.
After trying to show them where they could find the answers they "sought" in Scripture only to see them continue the turn from "questioning" to virtually championing everything unChristian from Brian MacLaren to Yoga, I delinked for good.
On the bright side that taught me to severely limit the number and type of blogs I visit on even a semi-regular basis, which was a good thing. - 7:21 PM, November 17, 2008
- ~Mark said...
- This comment has been removed by the author.
- 7:29 PM, November 17, 2008
- ~Mark said...
Speaking of "being authentic", I posted a note on my Facebook page the other day 'cause I was thinking of that topic.
What if, while defending "just being real" you discover that the real you is a jerk? - 7:30 PM, November 17, 2008
- candy said...
Rachel said: I'm getting ready to "share my testimony" (you know, the lady equivalent of preaching/teaching :) )at our women's Bible study this week, and have been praying particularly that it would really be a time of telling Christ's story, rather than my own.
It is funny you brought that up. A friend and I were just mentioning that at her women's meetings, testimonies seem to be the oft used teaching material. We were lamenting the fact that many women's meetings don't dive into good theological teaching instead. My friend stated that she just doesn't like to go to her women's meetings because so often the women dissolve into tears over someone's heartfelt, tumultuous past. I used to go to the same church and lamented the same thing. I was pleased that at the last women's retreat we had Noel Piper as our speaker.
Some women's meetings are like the Christian version of PostSecrets. - 6:02 AM, November 18, 2008
@ ~Mark
That seems to be one of the more consistent revelations I get after periods of introspection. I try to use it as a starting place for understanding my own need to be humble before the Lord and others, not to mention the daily necessity of repentance. - 6:26 AM, November 18, 2008
- Terry Rayburn said...
Eph. 4:15 takes care of a lot of the problem...
"...speaking the truth...
in love." - 8:38 AM, November 18, 2008
- David A. Carlson said...
This post made me think of Mathew 23 and "whitewashed sepulchres".
- 2:50 PM, November 18, 2008
- Jay said...
It's always a bit of a balancing act, isn't it? Surely people don't need to keep doubts, fears, struggles, etc. bottled up inside due to misplaced feelings of shame. If someone is going through a rough time spiritually, they need to be honest about it. But I think they need to be honest in a way that is seeking a solution to the struggle, not glorifying the struggle in itself, and I think where the problem with the Internet comes in.
I'll be frank, I post about my inner workings and struggles often. It's not exactly easy talking about homosexual struggles in person, especially in the more conservative South. But I have gradually learned to not post on them until after I've come to at least somewhat of a solution or course of action to take to them.
And I often call for people to give me ideas and solutions, since I know there is a network of men and women who have made further strides in this area than I have and who can give advice that I couldn't exactly get from the Christians around me (no offense to them, of course; it's just a unique struggle).
Making it public instead of private is something I am concerned about, because on one hand I don't want to be a stumbling block to anyone else, but on the other hand there is a benefit to putting a human face onto a struggle that most people don't deal with and many are completely ignorant of. - 4:58 PM, November 18, 2008
- Jim Pemberton said...
There's a lot of good stuff here.
My observation is that if people are disemboweling themselves spiritually, there is some felt need that doing so will meet. There are two possibilities in this regard.
First, internal presuppositional conflict isn't being answered adequately and people are desperate to find the answer that will give them peace. Simply telling them to shut up and be a man won't address the root of the issue, part of which is the second possibility:
Second, common relationships in western culture have degraded to the point where we all but refuse to meet each other's emotional needs. Without godly fiendships, people despair. We are told that we need to develop godly friendships. However, we cannot control others and there are no guarantees that someone else will want to be a friend. This means that the only thing we can do is be a friend whether or not our friendship is reciprocated. The problem is that if you have no friends, you have no model for how to be a friend. It's a horrible position to be in and way too many people, including Christians, are in it.
This all contributes to many of our sociological problems such as divorce, gang activity, homosexuality and the drug culture.
What's the solution? If you have know how to be a friend, befriend someone who needs to learn and teach them by example. This is the greatest ministry for propagating godly wisdom. - 8:56 AM, November 19, 2008


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1816 Argentina declares independence from Spain
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Perhaps the finest tangible way of commemorating different stages of a relationship is sanctifying them with jewelry - something you feel best symbolizes the unbroken bond you have shared for so long. This obviously differs from person to person, but some ideas worth considering - and even building upon - include gold rings or jewelry to mark your first year together, diamonds to mark your tenth year, platinum jewelry and/or emerald gemstones for your twentieth, ruby or garnet stones marking your fortieth, fancy blue diamonds for your landmark fiftieth anniversary, and so on.
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From: My Kitchen Snippets
4 eggs
80 gram sugar
80 gram cake flour
20 gram custard powder or cornstarch
¼ tsp salt
50 gram butter - melted
A few drop of strawberry essence
A few drop of pink coloring
200 ml whipping cream
3 tbsp confectioners' sugar
Some fresh strawberry
1. Line and grease a 10" x 14" sheet pan. Pre-heat the oven to 375 degree F. Sift cake flour, custard powder and salt together and set it aside.
2. Whisk eggs and sugar together till light and fluffy. Add in strawberry essence, pink coloring and gently fold in sifted flour mixture, add in melted butter and mix well until combined.
3. Pour into the baking pan and bake it for 15-17 minutes or till lightly brown and springy to the touch.
4. Remove the cake from oven and let it cool completely on wire rack. In the meantime whip the fresh cream with confectioners' sugar until light and fluffy. Refrigerate it before using.
5. When the cake is cool, remove the lining, place the cake on a piece of large parchment paper. Trim the edges. Spread the fresh cream, place some strawberries on the wide ends of the cake.
6. Using the parchment paper as guide, gently roll up (from the strawberries side) the cake. Wrap the cake up with the parchment paper and refrigerate the cake for 30 minutes
7. Decorate the cake with some fresh cream and fresh strawberries before serving.
I am submitting this entry to Aspiring Bakers #9 - Swiss Rolling Good Times (July 2011) hosted by Obsessedly Involved with Food.


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Birthday OOTD & Vlog :)
3:07 PMHi everyone! I just first off want to say thank you so much for the lovely birthday messages you've sent me. I'm not gonna lie, it's not something I was expecting and I actually got a bit emotional reading all of them. Maybe it is redundant for me to say it, but I really want to say how deeply I appreciate all of your love and support.
As I told you before, I recorded an Outfit Of The Day (aka OOTD) video for my birthday, and I also included a reveal of a couple of special presents.
Items Mentioned:
Abercrombie Lace top (similar / similar)
Forever 21 tank top & satin blazer, size 2
J Brand "Clocker" legging jeans, size 23
Stuart Weitzman Wedgelin boot, size 4
Necklace and bangle were from various Hautelook sales (my invite)
Michael Kors "Blair" watch in rose gold
Louis Vuitton Trevi PM
Lipgloss is MAC 3D glass in Racy (Sadly it's an old limited edition which I am crossing my fingers that they will re-release because it's one of my favorite lipglosses of all time!)
So here is my outfit in pieces since I didn't have room to do a full-body with the giant Christmas tree behind me. ;)
My bling for the evening. Gold tones and Urban Decay Zippy glitter polish. This crystal quartz necklace is especially one of my favorite pieces of the moment. I got it from Hautelook (for a dang good discount) and the designer is Vivian Tamayo. I'm also lusting after similar crystal pieces like this and this. There's just something about rock crystal that is really cool and edgy, and matches everything I own.
Birthday present reveal! This is the Michael Kors Blair rose gold watch that I bought during the Macy's Friend's & Family sale. The Macy's site listed the face as being 41mm but Nordie's and Dillards lists it as 39mm. No idea which is true but I think it looks nice on me even though I have tiny wrists.
Also available in champagne, chocolate, silver, and silver with rose gold accents.
And here is my bag reveal of what I got from Louis Vuitton in Paris! It's the Trevi PM in Damier Ebene. I love the pleats and how it has both top handles and a shoulder strap for versatility. It's my first and only LV purchase and I am totally in love with it!
Here's what it looks like worn using the top handles.
And my favorite way of wearing it, using the top straps which is much more comfortable and convenient.
And of course, here are the two cameos from the vlog at the end of my video.
First is my very special birthday cake appearance, Hello Kitty. =^_^=
And second is my long-haired Chihuahua, Cherry. She's a total sweetie!
I hope you enjoyed my outfit and getting a little peek into my birthday activities with my family as well. It was truly a wonderful one this year and I feel so grateful to be with the people I love, and of course to be given the blessing of your love and support as well!
Just out of curiosity, since the purse was a huge splurge for me, I want to know in the comments how you guys feel about big splurges on luxury items? Is it something you do and do you feel it's worth it? What was your favorite splurge purchase? Let me know!
67 comments
Happy birthday! Love your outfit, cake, doggy, and of course your Trevi PM--which I also own and adore. :)
ReplyDeleteThat cake is too cute to eat. Happy birthday. Good vlog.
http://www.thegirlieblog.comHappy b-lated, Jen!
I really enjoyed that video. I think the watch was lovely. And of course, your outfit was very nice too.
Cherry is so cute! Hahaha at first I thought she looked scared or something XP- AnonymousDecember 16, 2011 at 3:56 PM
Once again, happy belated birthday Jen! :) And what a cute cake! It suits you perfectly.
I think spending money on a big luxury splurge is generally worth it. Mostly because the more $ you spend, the more thought you have to put into it. Months or years of saving up for a luxury item really gives you time to think about how much you actually love it. And for a lot of cases, items from a "luxury" brand can be re-sold again for a price close to the price you paid if you take care of it well. Or you can pass it down to daughters, nieces, etc. in the future, which is a nice thought :)
Well no matter what it is, expensive or not, we all have the right to buy whatever we please with the hard earned money we make! I support you in your Paris LV purchase; I probably would have done the same thing. :) Happy belated Birthday!!! :] Your outfit, gifts, cake, family, and puppy are perfect~ hope you had a wonderful one!
ReplyDeleteyour birthday gifts are amazing! and that cake is too cute!!
http://vivaladaisy.blogspot.comI'm glad you had a great birthday. You definitely deserve it! Your cake is absolutely adorable!
I don't splurge on luxury items very often, namely because I work with a small salary and have issues saving because I tend to buy my friends and family small gifts all year round. If I go shopping and see something that I think you'd like, I'll buy it and give it to you the next time I see you. I am really terrible about that, haha.Happy birthday!! What an awesome cake! And it looks like you've trained your dog well. :)
I'm generally not a fan of luxury splurges, unless 1) you are already saving well for emergencies and retirement, and 2) the item really adds to your life.
I'm going to splurge soon on a trip to San Francisco. That's gonna be a lot of money spent, but I rarely take vacation, so the experience is worth it to me.Happy belated birthday! Your cake is so adorable, and I love the style of the purse you got. :)
I don't splurge often, although this year I splurged big time (for a student budget) to gift myself a small Chanel as my graduation gift. I don't mind splurging once in a while as long as I love the item 100%, can get a good use out of it, and the decision wasn't influenced by anybody else.Jen the watch is stunning on you, especially paired with the bangle. Love the bag too :)
Happy Birthday - hope you had a fab one!
BeverlyYour watch is gorg! I love your cake and your little cutie Cherry!
Lindsey Turner
http://thriftandshout.blogspot.comHappy birthday, Jen! And both the cake and Cherry are just super cute!
Thank you for all the videos and all the tutorials!
Visit me:
LeeAnne, Style N Season
http://stylenseason.blogspot.comHAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!!!! u look amazing!! love your LV bag and loooooovvvveeee the watch!! ;)
ReplyDelete- AnonymousDecember 16, 2011 at 7:56 PM
Happy belated birthday! Your dog is adorable, and I think she should have more cameos in your videos in the future.
I don't see anything wrong with splurging every once in awhile, especially since you give your big purchases a lot of thought. And in my mind that makes it more worth it :)
I splurged a tiny bit this Christmas as a small present to myself for surviving my first semester of grad school and got myself the UD Naked palette. i recently bought my 1st LV bag and it's the same as yours! love my trevi pm! great choice, jen!!!
ReplyDeleteHi Jenn,
I love how you match the colour of your accessories! The watch and the bag is gorgeous!
Please check out my blogpost on Zoya's Jem
www.passionblossom.blogspot.comGlad to hear you had an amazing birthday, Jen!
& good choice on the bag! The Trevi has always been my favourite LV bag :)Happy Birthday Jen!
Cherry is such a cutie! :3 Hope to see more of her in your videos :D
I usually don't care for brand name bags, but I have to say, the Trevi looks really nice! It's a good size and shape.Happy belated birthday, Jen! I super adore your doggie. I literally squealed. She's so sweet. ^^
And grats on your first LV! It suits you very well. :)what nail polish do you have on your nails? It's really pretty :)
And Happy Belated Birthday!I've been enjoy your blog in 2011. Wish you more beautiful and stylish in 2012. Happy holiday!
ReplyDeleteI love the whole outfit, Jen! Happy Belated Birthday, btw! I checked out CVS yesterday because you talked about the clearance sle and started following Nouveau Cheap - I never even knew CVS had those kinds of clearance deals...so thanks!
ReplyDelete- AnonymousDecember 17, 2011 at 12:31 PM
Happy bday Jen :) Loved the vlog and looks like you had a lot of fun! Cute HK cake :)
ReplyDelete Happy bday girl! Your doggie is soooo adorable. I got the exact same MK Blair watch with the rhinestones, earlier this year during a Bloomies sale. I'm glad to see a fellow petite with tiny wrists loving the same watch. Enjoy your special day!
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday Jen! I wish you have a wonderful one. Thank you so much for sharing with us your journey with acne and of course, awesome tutorials. Happy holidays :)
ReplyDeleteHappy belated b-day Jen! Your watch is GORGEOUS! And I didn't know you had a doggy. She's so cute!
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday Jen!! Please PLEASE just keep doing what you're doing because I'm pretty sure we all love it ㅋㅋ and know that you are a beautiful person both inside and out and I hope that maybe someday I'll be able to tell you that in person ^-^
Btw I've been wanting a chihuahua for some time now and seeing yours just makes me want one even more. But I heard they're loud. How's cherry in regards to that ?
Happy birthday again!!We share the same birthday! Happy belated birthday! Love the trevi and the doggy crawl :)
www.rarepersona.comHiii Jen
I wish you a very happy birthday.
Stay as you are. You're beautiful and your blog is really interesting. Thanks and sorry my english isn't really good.
Joyeux anniversaire
VikieA little late but still, happy birthday Jen! I love your bag and gorgeous watch and I also didn't know that you have such an adorable little dogie ;)
ReplyDeleteHello Jen! Happy belated birthday. Love your blog. I purchased a pair of JBrand jeans from Hautelook. They are the Pencil Leg Jeans in Jett (?). Basically they're a pair of black skinny jeans and the material feels so nice. They are in a size 23. I'd love to send them to you. I promise you I have never worn them before in my life, except when I tried them on and they choked the life out of me. I'm usually a 0 or 00, but I had never tried JBrand jeans before, so I guess for high end denim, I should have known better.
In fact, I still have the original tags on them.
Anyways, if you are interested, I'd love to send them to you.
P.S. It's my birthday today (=]) Yay December kids!Happy birthday :) I wish you all the best for you.
love your bag so much haha :)
blushoff.blogspot.comhappy belated and I just love coming to your blog from time to time, i'm the total opposite of petite, but i love your style, makeup and LOVE your personality.
I think the way you shop, you deserve a splurge! You know how to find good deals, and use your money. Splurging a little never hurts. I do regret some purchases but your taste does change.
I also LOVE your hair! how do you keep it lightly curled and natural looking?For me, it is okay to splurge once in awhile. I would do the same if I were you and I am actually saving up to own my 1st LV bag :)
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday! What great presents! I wanted to mention I saw the peach lip balm you mentioned in previous post. It is now on HauteLook: http://www.hautelook.com/product/2819004
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday, Jenn! Hope you had a lovely celebration. Your dad is so adorable! Cheers to awesome Korean dads! :) <3
ReplyDeletei think it's perfectly fine to spoil yourself and splurge once in a while. happy belated birthday jen!
much love,
check out my over $100+ estee lauder product giveaway!Happy belated birthday!
What a lovely post! You look very chic, and the hello kitty cake is just too adorable and your dog is so cute!!!
I feel that it's ok to splurge more or less once in a while as a way to reward and pamper yourself to give yourself a nice break from everyday responsibilities.Yaaaaayyyy! First of all... I saw love your cake! I wish I could have that on my birthday! Wiieee! And the watch... love the color. It's unusual. Stay pretty! :)
Belated Happy Birthday girl!Happy birthday! Big splurges are okay once in a while and after consulting first with hubby. When i was still single and started working as a nurse Bought myself my first LV mono speedy 9 years ago and it was one of the best splurges, it still looks great to this day and the patina is now a beautiful honey color. Enjoy your beautiful bag!
ReplyDeleteBelated Happy Birthday Jen! I hope your birthday was wonderful! I so love your outfit and definitely the watch! Can't wait for more tutorials!
http://crazymixup.blogspot.com/Handbags, especially LV, are timeless. With proper care you will never have to buy another handbag, ever. I actually am thinking of getting the same handbag!
ReplyDeleteHi Jen! Hope you had a great birthday! :) forever young! hahaha! :)
Mmm...I think that luxury splurges are fine -- just as long as they're not frequent or regular (unless you absolutely need it). Also, I think it's really important to ask others or check out the internet for reviews on the products, since it's just a huge spend.
A while ago I bought a Diorshow Extase mascara, and it did wonders :D but I found there were cheaper brands that could do better ._."Very cute bag Jen!!! Happy Birthday!
I wanted to also say thank u... a few years back when I was in high school you did a video about how u suffered with acne and how your outside doesn't determine what makes u beautiful.... It helped me so much because I was suffering with severe acne at the time.
Youre beautiful
Check out my blog sometime...
http://highfashion-higherpurpose.blogspot.com/Hi Jen! I've been following your blog quite a while :) first of all, Happy Birth Day!!! Second of all, love your outfit and your LV! Spending money on a big luxury splruge is totally ok and everybody deserves it. I own a couple of luxury purses and have worked hard for each one of them.
:)Omgosh! I a extremely jealous of you! Happy belated birthday! <3
http://foreverkellytran.blogspot.comHappy belated birthday! And Merry Christmas too! I love the LV and the MK watch. I've been lusting to get a MK watch for myself for awhile now too. Still waiting for a good deal to pop up though :P
ReplyDeleteHappy belated birthday Jen.. This is my first time ever posting on your blog but I've been following you for a couple months now and I just want you to know that I really enjoy watching & reading your stuff... I wanted to see if you could possibly review the MK watch. I just got one for christmas and well...I didn't get the one w/crystals but I've read reviews & people have said that the crystals fall off. I really do like the one you have so I'm thinking about exchanging but I dont want to exchange if the crystals are going to fall off.. If thats the case I'd rather keep the more simple one I have. Also, I found that removing 2 links off my watch is still too big (I have small wrists also) so the watch slides half way down my arm but if I remove 3 then the watch stays in one place and does NOT move at all.. Did you by chance encounter this problem?
ReplyDeleteHi Jen,
I'm a long time reader but it's my first time to comment.
I remember when you wrote this post. (Yes, it has been a while) Still loving your posts and videos. =)
I wanted to ask you a question.. I know that you have been using your MK watch for a while now. Does it wear off? I've seen quite a bit of reviews saying that it wore off. I know I'm a bit late on the trend but I'm contemplating if I should get one during this shopping season.
Thanks again for your awesome work!I love all the clothing accessories you have, escpially the Louis Vuitoon bag . My daughters wear some of these pieces of clothing. They are at that age when they want to dress a little more girly. My wife and I try to keep their styles appropriate but we know some great ways to find Cute Clothing that they like. We usually get them a lot of clothes for Christmas and we do most of the shopping online because most sites have a great selection.


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Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Face-Lift 171
Guess the Plot
Seasons of Mist
1. Althea loved the morning mist in the Highlands. It was the only reason she stayed. Well, that and the handsome Laird in the wind-whipped kilt.
2. Two young neighbors learn about a land over the mountains where people are corporeal throughout the entire year, and set off on the adventure of a lifetime to see this wonder for themselves.
3. Alisa floats on a cloud of Valium, hoping sedation will keep her from losing the baby. Maybe someone should point out to her that she's not pregnant.
4. Carolina Bupkus wants to see the leaves turn color in New England, but her husband has other ideas. His vacation plans include the steam turbine exhibits at several power plants.
5. Laura Grimble's stint as Channel 9 weather girl was rapidly going down the tubes. Even her topless reading couldn't overcome her monotonous forecasts.
6. In her quest for "Endless Damp," Gladys spends her springs in Cornwall, her summers in the Orkneys, her autumns in Seattle, and her winters in San Francisco. That is, until a sudden burst of sunshine forces her to confront her surfer-girl past.
Original Verson
Dear Agent,
Seasons of Mist is a 90,000 word novel of contemporary literary fiction.
Alisa BenSarai has tried 5 years for a baby. When the results of one more invasive fertility procedure are negative, she becomes furious at the world and her husband, Mickey, and drives away from Los Angeles. In a McDonald's parking lot, surrounded by children, Alisa has a chance meeting with a mother who [offers her three of her children.] gives her the number of an adoption facilitator. This will be the way to her baby. [Adoption! Why didn't I think of that? Thank God I stopped at McDonald's.]
Alisa begins her adoption process against the backdrop of 9-11. The events of that day give her an urgency, but unhinge her as well. As birth mother Missy goes through the various stages of pregnancy, Alisa goes through them, too, living in a trailer like the birth mother, [Living in a trailer is a highly underrated stage of pregnancy, possibly the most underrated.] making herself throw up to feel morning sickness, renting a pregnancy pillow from a make-up effects company to pretend to grow large. Using increasingly bizzare methods, Alisa induces other symptoms of pregnancy: sore breasts, heartburn, weight gain, dizziness and nausea. [I can induce three of those symptoms (heartburn, weight gain and nausea) just by going up the street and ordering the lasagna vindaloo at Ristorante Ranjudeep .] So consumed is she that toward the end of her "pregnancy," Alisa decides that she is a special case who must be sedated so she doesn't lose the child. Hiding from her husband, alone in a trailer park in Malibu, she floats on a cloud of Valium, [Doesn't she know she should be on placebos while she's pretending to be pregnant?] barely connected to the world. At last Mickey acts. He finds her near death, and rescues her. When she is recovered, together, they go to Georgia for the birth of their new baby. Missy gives up the baby because, "With you," Missy says, "this child has a chance." [I've got news for Missy: with Alisa, this child is doomed.]
I've enclosed a five page sample. A full manuscript is available upon request.
Revised Version
Dear Agent,
When the results of yet another invasive fertility procedure prove negative, Alisa BenSarai decides that five years is enough trying. Adoption is the only way to her baby.
Against the backdrop of 9-11, Alisa contacts an adoption facilitator. The events of that day fill her with a sense of urgency, but unhinge her as well. As birth mother Missy goes through the stages of pregnancy, Alisa goes through them too, making herself throw up to feel morning sickness, using a pregnancy pillow to pretend to grow large, and inducing symptoms of pregnancy: sore breasts, heartburn, weight gain, dizziness and nausea. She even starts living in a trailer, as the birth mother does.
So consumed is she that toward the end of her "pregnancy," Alisa decides that she is a special case who must be sedated so she doesn't lose the child. Hiding from her husband, alone in a trailer park in Malibu, she floats on a cloud of Valium, barely connected to the world.
Seasons of Mist is a 90,000-word novel of contemporary literary fiction. I've enclosed a five page sample. A full manuscript is available upon request.
I'm no expert, but I believe the amount of Valium that she would take to sedate herself, even if she overdoes it a bit, is not going to put her near death. Maybe you can come up with a stronger drug--unless she's trying to kill herself.
It wrapped up too neatly, so I removed the ending. I'm worried that the book wraps up too neatly as well. Hey, this is literary fiction. Either Alisa dies, or Missy finds out she's a nutcase and keeps the baby.
Apparently none of Alisa's unusual actions would have occurred if not for 9-11? When her husband rescues her, he tells her, "Hang on, honey, if you die, the terrorists win." Right?
36 comments:
- Anonymous said...
Not to mention that if she really were pregnant and very concerned about not losing the baby, she'd probably avoid drugs like the plague.
- Anonymous said...
Hmm...I don't know about this. I mean, if this was a backdrop of 9/11 in either New York or northern New Jersey, I might buy it.
I think there would be more urgency if the locale was changed to one of the ones I mentioned; L.A. during 9/11? I just don't know.
Of course, that could just be me.
~Nancy - 8/29/06, 3:51 PM
- Anonymous said...
Why would she give this kid to a headcase like Alisa? I guess I don't see either how 9/11 ties into all this.
- Anonymous said...
Well, obviously Alisa is a nutcase, and Missy is stupid--both are symptoms of acute pregnitis. I believe they call it the "maternal lobotomy." Those hormones'll fuck you right up.
- Brenda said...
Oh, and Endless Damp? Thought for sure it'd be erotica.
- Brenda said...
Uh. Yeah. No way would she end up with a baby. She'd end up in a straight-jacket instead.
I've had the honor of finding my birth mother. If the one in this story is remotely aware of what this woman is doing, I highly doubt she'd hand over the child to someone so broken from reality. It's emotionally/psycologically hard enough to give your baby away (at least in all the cases I've researched) much less to someone like... that. - 8/29/06, 4:34 PM
- Bernita said...
The vallium is a wall-banger.
Now if she took it because she finally realized what a nut-case she had been, then it might fly.
And I think maternal lobotomy is a myth. - 8/29/06, 4:50 PM
- Anonymous said...
EE, your Guess the Plots are just too funny!
wind-shipped kilt, topless readings, and "corporeal throughout the entire year."
Thanks as always for the daily doses of humor. - 8/29/06, 5:11 PM
- Kathleen said...
I feel like this query lacked any guidance on the themes of the book. Sometimes the talk of themes can go overboard (like the "engaged" "disengaged" from the last query). However, for this one, I really need some hook as to why we should read it. Because I am not that interested in the story as it is laid out. Why should we care? I just feel like some mention of the theme of a book is important in a query.
anyone disagree? - 8/29/06, 6:15 PM
- Anonymous said...
To me, the query just seemed confussing. I couldn't follow the story well. I didn't understand why she all of a sudden pretended to be pregnant. We went from the parking lot to some trailer park, and where's her husband? However, I am not a mother and have no desire to have children, so maybe it's a book that wouldn't appeal to me anyway. I also, don't know why 9/11 matters, unless she lived in New York. I'm in Oregon, and even though I thought it was horrible, I KNOW New Yorkers had the worst time with it.
Side note: When Kathleen said, "why should we care?" it brought a shiver to me and reminded me of my senior seminar class in college. We'd write two dozen pages on something we cared about, and our professor would just look at us and ask "why should we care?" - 8/29/06, 6:53 PM
- Anonymous said...
I guessed fake plot # 2 (not that I wanted to read that, either).
When I got to the "With you...this child has a chance" sentence in the original query, I wanted to shred the query and throw it in the trash. jmho.
Unless Missy is more messed up than Alisa or there's a ton of money involved to explain Missy's decision, don't go there. Again, jmho.
From this query, I didn't like Alisa. Nothing made me want to root for her or read this.
But author, remember, I didn't much like any of the literary/Nobel winners' openings either.
comment offered fwiw (and strictly my own, without reading the others) - 8/29/06, 6:54 PM
- Anonymous said...
"lasagna vindaloo"?
The mind boggles. - 8/29/06, 7:09 PM
- Anonymous said...
I disliked this one so much that I am positive it will sell, probably at auction. It might make the cover of NYTBR.
- Annie said...
Okay, there are quite a few problems here, but the first -- and most pressing -- is the fact that you clearly have done no research on the adoption process. One woman cannot simply give her child to another. Even in a case of private adoption where the potential birthmother commits to a couple without the placement services of a fascilitator, the adoptive couple still MUST meet certain state requirements, undergo a background check and have AT LEAST one homestudy, performed by a social workers from the department of children and family and services. (Some states require as many as three visits from a case worker.) I can GUARANTEE that this woman would not be approved to adopt. That is absolutely ludicrous. The woman clearly needs to be under psychiatric care. Possibly as an inpatient. No birthmother would ever choose her. Women who are placing their children with adoptive families agonize over the decision and make sure thier children get the best life possible. They do not place them with women who are emotionally unstable. And even if this birthmother DID choose this family, the government simply would not allow it.
I was also confused by the fact that she apparently never considered adoption until meeting some random woman at McDonald's. (Perhaps that is not how it happens in the book, but that is how it happens in the query.) And I could not for the life of me figure out what 9/11 had to do with any of this.
But those problems are far less crucial than this flaw in your premise. I highly recommend that you take a break from writing and do some serious research before going any further. - 8/29/06, 7:30 PM
- Daisy Bateman said...
This query could only have been redeemed for me if it ended with, 'And Missy took one look at her and said, "Hell no!"'
By the way I really hope there are other reasons why it is so bad for Missy to keep the baby other than that she lives in a trailer in the South. - 8/29/06, 8:29 PM
- HawkOwl said...
I was liking it until it came to the World Trade Center thing, and then once I got to the ending I was disappointed that it's all shiny-happy, with the husband doing the Knight in Shining Armour thing and Alisa going back to normal just like that.
Other than that, I thought the premise was actually fairly plausible, judging by my experience of women who are trying to have kids. Especially ones who are not succeeding. A lot of them are "unhinged" at the best of times. For any trauma you can think of, there is a small percentage of people who will be completely undone by it. Alisa's downfall, apparently, is infertility. There was no need for the WTC thing for her to come unglued.
Maybe it works on reading the whole novel, but I really don't trust the World Trade Center subplot. First, I wonder if it's a platform for some kind of opinion. Second, it makes the story a lot less relatable. Emotionally, the WTC is to me as Giant Mine might be to you - except I've heard of the WTC. Am I gonna feel for a woman who goes insane because of it? Not really. I thought your fellow Americans might, but apparently, neither do they. It also pins down the piece geographically and chronologically too much. I didn't think the basic concept needed a fancy backdrop, really.
Then, the part where the husband takes action is weird. Is it a coincidence that he decides to go looking for her just at the right moment to rescue her from a drug problem, or did he somehow know how she was doing all along and it took the drugs to make him intervene? The query made it sound like the drugs caused him to act. If it's a coincidence... Coincidences are not good for plots.
And the part where he "saves" her? The choice of words kinda makes the whole query fall flat on its face. Until then it seemed to be on a fairly adult level, but the guy "saving" her all of a sudden makes it feel very fairy tale. You could say he drags her to a shrink instead.
Her getting the baby didn't seem weird to me, partly because nothing surprises me as long as it's set in the US, and partly because one can indulge in some seriously weird behaviour before the authorities will notice. What I found dubious was where Missy says the baby has a chance with Alisa. I'd like to believe that this is ironic, as in Alisa is completely nuts and no one really noticed (except her man, whose name I forget), and Missy is making a terrible mistake handing her kid over to this lunatic. Then you could have a sequel showing what becomes of the kid. However, I fear the actual plot is much less grim.
I'd want to read more, but I don't know if I'd get through the whole thing. - 8/29/06, 8:42 PM
- Anonymous said...
I confused by why so many people are confused about the use of 9-11 as a backdrop. Did 9-11 only affect people in NY? Did the rest of us not in NY just simply go about our lives as if nothing happened? What's interesting to me is the possibility of the difference in experience between someone in another part of the country. As for the research aspect, it's a novel we're led to believe, not a nonfiction account of how the adoption system works. Why would a query explicitly tell us that "and she has three visits from social workers ordered by the court and none of them can tell she's losing it." I just think some of the comments are a bit heavy-handed.
- Anonymous said...
Call me crazy, but I loved this premise, and would totally read this book. Like EE, however, I found the ending way too pat -- this needs to be a tragedy.
- Anonymous said...
Uh, I'm sorry, but I just don't get it. Why would I want to root for this person? And why would 9/11 be a backdrop for a quest for a child? What makes her think she's so special? Oh, yeah... she's crazy. If it's literary fiction, what the HECK is the message supposed to be? What is our inspiration? How does it force us to use our grey matter? Okay, I'm being mean. I'll stop now.
- Anonymous said...
Did the rest of us not in NY just simply go about our lives as if nothing happened?
Pretty much. I'd like half a sentence of why - maybe she had family in the area, even if they weren't hurt. Maybe she thinks the world's going to end and she has to have a baby *now*.
The unlikliness of the adoption procedure didn't really bother me. - 8/29/06, 11:01 PM
- Annie said...
Why would a query explicitly tell us that "and she has three visits from social workers ordered by the court and none of them can tell she's losing it.
She has run away from home and is living in a trailer inducing the signs of pregnancy and overdosing on valium. Her husband doesn't even know where she is. Clearly she is not having ANY visits from social workers. When he does find her, she is "near death", which I assume means she has to go to the hospital, where her doctors would document her drug use and psychosis.
I don't care that the query spell out the adoption process. I care that the book is well researched. Obviously this woman is not a candidate for adoption. Some research needs to be done to adapt the story to fit within the parameters of reality. - 8/29/06, 11:30 PM
- Anonymous said...
Weeeell... portions of this I think could be interesting. The hysterical pregnancy thing is compelling. I don't see the 9-11 connection, but I think it could be explained. I'd caution against it, though, because it dates the piece and feels like a ploy rather than a true plot point.
That said, the ending stretches my suspension of disbelief beyond the breaking point. It's hard enough to believe that Missy would give her baby up to Alisa, who is clearly in need of intervention, especially when Alisa starts drugging herself. But when she makes a point of saying that with Alisa the kid has a chance? Is that supposed to be irony? Well, maybe I can even swallow that much if it's done well. Maybe Missy has had no contact with Alisa and doesn't know what's been happening.
But when the husband shows up just in the nick of time? Big turn off. And he, seeing the state Alisa is in, takes her to Georgia to proceed with the adoption of the baby instead of immediately seeking medical and mental help for his wife???
What is he thinking?
Sorry, I'd pass. - 8/29/06, 11:32 PM
- HawkOwl said...
I don't think there is anything about the pregnancy symptoms that ought to be a red flag. A friend of mine is adopting a baby and she's on all kinds of drugs to make her lactate so she can breastfeed after she gets the baby. There is also such a thing as couvade, and nowadays a lot of people say "we're pregnant" when clearly only one person is (though I suppose same-sex couples might be pregnant simultaneously). So even if Alisa is on hormones and talking about "her" pregnancy all the time, that's not necessarily something the case worker would find alarming. And there's nothing wrong with being pregnant in a trailer. Nowhere does it say that the trailer is slovenly, unsafe, off the grid, or otherwise disturbing to behold. Valium is a problem, but what if she starts on it after she's had her home study? Case worker would never know.
And "running away from home," when done by an adult woman, is called "moving out" and is also not the end of the world. Single women can adopt. It sounds to me like Alisa left her man, then started on the adoption.
There is no reason she can't look perfectly normal long enough to get approved. It's almost weirder that she can go back to her man and not have to go through the screening again.
Crazy people and drug addicts can look disturbingly normal from the outside. Just look at Ted Bundy. That's the great thing, potentially, about this plot. This woman is going nuts and somebody thinks she's the perfect mother.
And really, she might yet turn out to be the perfect mother. After all, the fact that she desperately wants to experience pregnancy doesn't seem like it would pose a threat to the child afterwards. The drugs, yes, but the obsession, not so much.
Annie has a point on the near-death-by-Valium thing, though. If she has to be "rescued" by her ex and, presumably, treated by a health professional, that would definitely attract some attention. So maybe back off on the drugs. Actually, it would be even creepier if we see her starting on the drugs, and we know that but the other characters don't, so she still gets the baby. Now we don't know whether she'll get clean and be a great mother, or lose it and sell the child to her crack dealer in another few years. Fascinating.
I think it's definitely got potential. I'm just not sure it's gonna be realized. - 8/30/06, 12:26 AM
- Anonymous said...
When I first read the ending, I mentally switched the names, and thought the adoptive mother decided not to accept the child because she realized she wasn't mentally stable enough to raise it.
Kind of a Solomon-esque twist: The poor trailer-trash birth mother was offering to give up her child so it could have a better home, while the adoptive mother finally saw that in her greed she would be bringing a helpless child into an unstable home.
Pretty good ending, I thought.
Then I reread it, saw what it really said, and thought, "uh oh." I was so not rooting for Alisa to get that baby. - 8/30/06, 12:48 AM
- writtenwyrdd said...
If 9/11 unhinged her, her pregnancy delusions ought to have something to do with terrorists wanting to kidnap her baby or something, don't you think? Images of Kosovo are running through my head and what was done to young women there... (she shudders)
Slowly going crazy is a difficult thing to write, so I won't say this plot couldn't work; but based on what's here, it wouldn't entice me to even open the book. Sorry. - 8/30/06, 8:15 AM
- Anonymous said...
If 9/11 unhinged her, her pregnancy delusions ought to have something to do with terrorists wanting to kidnap her baby or something, don't you think?
Why would that be? To watch the television coverage first in real time -- because I was up that early and watched both towers go down -- and then the aftermath when the networks showed an endless loop of towers falling, falling, was to believe that every building was about to go down, was to put yourself in the place of the people in the towers and become part of that horrible grinding mass.
Out here, there are twin towers in Century City that look remarkably like the ones in NY. I avoided tall buildings for weeks, and when our company told us we were relocating to a tower elsewhere, all of us were filled with dread.
9-11 happened, and I think writers have to find a way to integrate the event. Is setting a story at a certain time dating it? Possibly but so what? In the reading, we reenter that time.
One thing about this site is it helps me think about a book I'm working on and how I might put together a query. So if I had written this novel, I think all the points brought up here are probably easily solved in the novel itself, though I can't speak for the query: She needs to be visited by a social worker, fine, when does that happen in the process? Right at the end, at the beginning, in the middle? Whenever it happens, she pulls herself together for a couple of hours and snows DSS. She needs a hospital plan, she does a hospital plan. Maybe she isn't "rescued" by the husband but merely brought back from the edge of the abyss and, after heavy Valium use under the care of a health professional which would go into a synopsis and not a query, she recovers.
I think the clearest comments are from hawkowl who seems to best understand here how fiction functions. Annie, on the other hand, gets caught up in the Reality Fallacy. - 8/30/06, 12:09 PM
- braun said...
One thing about using 9/11 - I'm a little skeptical, when I see it mentioned as a 'backdrop' and then never worked into the story, as to whether it's not just an 'emotional shortcut', a cheap grab for sympathy for the characters. Maybe it isn't, but that's not at all clear from the way it's brought into the query.
Anon 12:09 - see, being afraid of tall buildings is interesting and besides it clearly relates to 9/11. I don't see how hiding out in a trailer and pretending to be pregnant does. If the idea is simply to give Alisa a "life is short" mentality then maybe just have her survive a car crash. Use something a little simpler than 9/11. - 8/30/06, 1:18 PM
- Anonymous said...
I think the clearest comments are from hawkowl who seems to best understand here how fiction functions. Annie, on the other hand, gets caught up in the Reality Fallacy.
I think the problem here is that the anonymous poster and hawkowl are missing the distinction between fantasy fiction and realistic fiction. As a reader, creating a story that operates in the real, modern world EXCEPT for the rules that are convenient (ie, adoption procedures, time-space continuums, whatever) is extremely distracting. I don't think you can choose to set a book in the real world and just tweak minor details -- without acknowledgement that that's what you are doing.
Of course, perhaps the author has constructed a new set of adoption laws that will be clearly established in her book as some kind of plot-point. If so, by all means, go for it. - 8/30/06, 1:53 PM
- Anonymous said...
Contemporary literary
" . . . been trying to have a baby for 5 months."
Triple turn-off for me. -JTC - 8/30/06, 4:00 PM
- HawkOwl said...
Maybe neither Anonymi should speak for HawkOwl. HawkOwl doesn't know California or Georgia or any adoption laws and doesn't care. What I'm saying is that whatever the laws are, this woman can totally look normal enough to get approved, as long as her abuse of Valium doesn't come to light.
- Anonymous said...
You can't freaking adopt if you're an obvious nutcase! The social workers would notice the trailer park and faux pregnancy and the estrangement from the intended father (and sorry, social workers are not stupid or blind no matter how convenient that is to the plot).
Besides domestic adoption is competitive. There are more parents than birthmothers, and the birthmothers are in control. So I guess Missy is just as crazy as Whackjob protagonist.
Then there's the state and mandated counseling plus parenting classes. And lawyers, even a private adoption requires paperwork.
You can't just go from a McDonald's parking lot to adopting a baby. Not in real life. You can try it in fiction, but no one will believe you.
If you want to write adoption /infertility fiction, at least try to make it believable. And unless this is alternate history or fantasy, you do have to at least try to follow the real adoption process. Otherwise you're going to get a lot of mail from irate adoptive parents.
Or do a SF version with Conehead Martians. Maybe outer space trailer parks are the way they do it.
With regards to this..."And "running away from home," when done by an adult woman, is called "moving out" and is also not the end of the world. Single women can adopt. It sounds to me like Alisa left her man, then started on the adoption."
Single women can adopt so long as they don't start their application as married women. You can't just change mid-stream. You've got to file paperwork. There has to be another homestudy. Your assets have to be distributed so you can prove your standalone income etc...
Anyone who thinks adoption is soooo simple has clearly never tried to adopt a child.
- HawkOwl said...
See, nothing in the query actually says that she doesn't start the adoption process as a single woman, or that she intends for her (ex)-husband to be a father to the adopted child. So like I said, what's weird isn't her adopting after leaving him, it's her bringing him back in just before adopting.
And again, what's wrong with trailer parks? Have you ever lived in a trailer park, or do you just watch Trailer Park Boys a lot? There are some really lovely trailer parks full of really lovely people out there. Some of them may even be in California.
And again, the woman having pregnancy symptoms is not alarming, even if someone noticed, which isn't guaranteed. Not all women make a display of being pregnant.
Clearly the author doesn't know as much as s/he should about the legal process of adoption, but I think a lot of you commenters know very little about mental illness and/or the emotional side of adoption.
The great thing about it, though, is how many knee-jerk reactions this query is getting so far. Whether it flies or not, at least people care. LOL - 8/30/06, 9:30 PM
- Anonymous said...
Anyone who thinks social workers and the like are some kind of failsafe to keep sh!thead freaks from acquiring innocent children has clearly not heard about that poor little boy in Ohio. The one placed in foster care and murdered (tied up and left in a closet for a weekend) by his social-worker approved foster parents.
Addiction (in this story) and pure evil (in real life) are separate issues, but things get missed. Backgrounds are not thoroughly investigated and it is highly plausible that this plot could work as written in the query. - 8/31/06, 2:48 PM
- Anonymous said...
I'm the author of the query and I want to thank everyone for the many comments and the lively discussion. Also to Evil Editor for the site. Although you get a shot are ridicule / humor in your initial comments, your revisions were very helpful.
For the novel, I think that every troublesome plot point of how the mechanics of an adoption process works is easily solved. Any Realist work needs sufficient detail to create verisimilitude; but I'm not writing a primer on inter-state adoption.
Concerns that someone on drugs would never be found a fit mother are valid, but the character, if you read the query, is only on them at the very end of the (false) term. We have many many examples of people who function fully as addicts of one sort or another -- until they crash (Rush Limbaugh, Keith Richards, Congressman Kennedy of Rhode Island to name a few). So this point doesn't worry me either.
9-11 is integrated as a catalyst of sorts but background, too. This may bother some who think it should be primary. But its gravitational force is too great for that. It's not a 9-11 story. It's a story that happens around the time 9-11 happened. As a writer and a person, I want to figure out how to integrate the horror of that day. Our protagonist is in California so her experience -- like so many others who didn't live right in Manhattan or across the way in New Jersey -- is at a necessary remove.
The book is finally a story of madness, how desire can shade into action and action into excess -- and how we might pull back from that excess and go on, even though we can't go on, we will go on.
The query obviously stirred some things up and that gives me encouragement. - 8/31/06, 5:45 PM
- Kathleen said...
The book is finally a story of madness, how desire can shade into action and action into excess -- and how we might pull back from that excess and go on, even though we can't go on, we will go on.
even though everyone wanted to talk about the adoption process rather than my question about themes (which is cool), I really think something like this needs to go into the query letter. Otherwise, it is really difficult to figure out the "point" of the book. Good luck. - 8/31/06, 8:32 PM
- HawkOwl said...
Author - Your comment sounds so much more thoughtful and competent than your query! LOL Now I really think this can go somewhere... Although I still hope it's gonna be the ironic-dark ending and not the shiny-happy ending.
Good luck! - 8/31/06, 11:05 PM


text:
British Government Bolsters Anti-Cybercrime Measures
Amidst a bewildering array of new teams and initiatives is a plan to more effectively fight cybercrime in the U.K.
The British state is introducing a new initiative to fight organized online crime: Cyber Crime Reduction Partnership (CCRP). The program will provide a new forum in which U.K. law enforcement, the computer industry and academia can regularly come together to tackle cybercrime more effectively.
Security Minister at the Home Office James Brokenshire, who is responsible for U.K. national security and counter-terrorism policy, announced the move at a cybersecurity briefing hosted by the British Computer Society/The Chartered Institute for IT.
"'For too long the public's perception of cybercrime has been a lone bedroom hacker stealing money from a bank account," said Brokenshire, "but the reality is that cybercriminals are organized and global, with a new breed of criminals selling 'off-the-shelf' software to aid gangs in exploiting the public."
Thus the partnership, to be jointly led by Brokenshire and fellow minister David Willetts, who heads the country's Universities and Science department. Their focus will be to help "ensure police and other law enforcement agencies can stay one step ahead of online criminals."
[ Is the role of government CIO unnecessary? The British state thinks so. Read U.K. Government: Who Needs A CIO? ]
The U.K. government already has a plethora of such programs -- and certainly the CCRP won't be the last. For example, in its first year of operation, London's Metropolitan Police Central e-Crime Unit reportedly prevented an estimated £538 million ($813 million) of "harm" to the public by organized e-criminals.
That police unit is part of the Cyber Security Strategy, which in turn is part of a £650 million ($982 million) project set up in the 2010 Strategic Defense and Security Review meant to strengthen the U.K.'s cyber capacity by 2014.
According to Brokenshire, the CCRP will soon be joined by several additional initiatives: a Cyber Security Information Sharing Partnership to better share information between industry and government; a National Computer Emergency Response Team; and a National Cyber Crime Unit within the NCA (National Crime Agency), which will merge that e-Crime Unit with the Serious Organised Crime Agency's Unit Cyber wing.
According to Brokenshire, the intent of this multitude of cybersecurity initiatives is to deepen the country's ability to combat cybercrime. "I am confident we can bring these criminals to justice," he said. "Through greater awareness and action from the public and industry and through continuing to work closely with our international partners, we can deliver a lasting and transformative impact on those criminals that seek to use the economy to harm the U.K. and its interests."
Easily overlooked vulnerabilities could put your data and business at risk. Also in the new, all-digital 10 Web Threats special issue of Dark Reading: How hackers compromised an iOS developers' website to exploit Java plug-in vulnerabilities and attack Apple, Facebook, Microsoft and Twitter. (Free with registration.)
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text:
This time of year is such a great time in the wide world of our fine feathered friends. Their plumage is nice and glossy, their combs and wattles are red and plump, they're thrilled to be finding bugs available for the picking (pecking?), and some hens are going broody, ready to sit on a clutch of eggs. In short, the birds are living the good life!
When my flock is happy, I'm happy. As such, I'd like to offer one small measure reader a copy of my book, Keeping Chickens. I'm also including with the book a couple of brown ceramic eggs. More than simply decorative objects (if you're into the whole poultry decor thing, that is), these eggs are incredibly handy to have around, for a variety of reasons.
Should you have a hen go broody, but don't have a rooster in your flock (and therefore lack any fertile eggs), you can tuck these eggs under her. She can then continue to sit without doing so on eggs you'd rather be consuming yourself (that is, unless you want to discourage her broodiness, in which case you'll need to block entry to the nesting box she's been using).
These ceramic eggs can also be used should you ever have a problem with a member of your flock eating their own eggs. An attempted peck or two at the fake eggs is pretty much all it takes to discourage the nibbling interloper from continued action.
To enter the giveaway, simply leave a comment below. Be sure to leave a means of contacting you in your reply, either via your email address or through a link back to your own blog or website. I'll run the giveaway through next Wednesday, April 18th, midnight EST. The giveaway is open to all residents of North America.
Whether you're already a chicken tender(er), or hoping to get a wing up on the venture this year, here's wishing you and your flock a world of food and fun!
UPDATE:The winner of my "Keeping Chickens" book and ceramic eggs giveaway is lucky #62, Sarah, of Frugal By Choice. Thank you so very much to everyone that entered, and props to you, Sarah!