text:
Project Members
- Natalia Aralova
- Sven Grawunder
Phonetic and phonological description of Even dialects (with a focus on acoustic vowel properties and vowel harmony)
The project was dedicated to the phonetics and phonology of Even, a Tungusic language spoken in eastern Siberia. In her dissertation, Natalia Aralova presented field data from two distant dialects, respectively pertaining to the village of Sebian-Küöl in Yakutia (Western dialect) and the district of Bystraia on the Kamchatka Peninsula (Eastern dialect). The main goals of her research were to investigate vowel oppositions, to clarify the distinction between the two vowel sets that are supposedly involved in vowel harmony, and to review the claims made for Even phonology in previous studies (e.g., that vowels are opposed by advanced vs. retracted tongue root (ATR vs. RTR)). To present the full picture of the sound system, the acoustic investigation of both vowels as well as liquid and stop consonants, which are also influenced by vowel harmony, was supplemented by perceptual data. [Natalia Aralova; advisors: Sven Grawunder (MPI-EvA), Brigitte Pakendorf (DDL, CNRS & Université Lyon 2), Silke Hamann & Paul Boersma (ACLC, University of Amsterdam)]


text:
Mr. Speaker, Europe's last dictator, Belarus' Alyaksandr Lukashenka, appears determined to ignore the voices of the people of Belarus calling for basic respect for human rights and democratic principles a decade after that country gained its independence and joined the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE).
As Chairman of the Helsinki Commission, I am disturbed by recent developments which demonstrate the growing repression in Belarus. There have been further restrictions imposed on the independent media, with the recent suspension of independent newspapers Navinki and Ekho. Just a few days ago, the publication Predprinimatelskaya Gazeta was suspended for three months. The offices of the trade union paper Solidarnost have been sealed by the authorities. Still other publications have received warnings that could lead to their closure. These actions were preceded by the three-month suspension of two prominent independent newspapers–Belaruskaya Delovaya Gazeta and BDG–For Internal Use Only.
The Lukashenka regime is also targeting schools. The National Humanities Lyceum, a highly respected high school promoting study of the Belarusian language and culture, is under fire, with its acting head to be replaced by a reportedly non-Belarusian-speaking official. Why? Because professors at the school support democracy and the Belarusian language and culture which ironically is anathema to the Belarusian strongman. Mr. Speaker, what kind of leader actively suppresses his nation's language and culture?
Moreover, a new crackdown on Pentecostal home meetings in western Belarus is underway, with fines being handed down on church members who permit their homes to be used for prayer meetings–a result of last year's restrictive religion law.
Non-governmental organizations (NGOs) are also facing increasing scrutiny, often for truly spurious reasons such as minor mistakes in registration documents. Several, including Ratusha, Varuta and the Youth Christian Social Union, are under threat of liquidation. Just a few days ago, the Homel regional court ordered the closure of the area's largest NGO, Civic Initiatives. The intensified campaign against NGOs and the independent media are widely regarded among domestic and international observers as a concerted attack on active and independent civil society structures.
Repressive actions against individuals continue as well. Recently, 18-year-old ZUBR activist Tatiana Elovaya was sentenced to 10 days imprisonment for manifesting her support in an April 3 demonstration outside the U.S. Embassy for the campaign to liberate Iraq. Several others, including 19-year-old Lyubov Kuchinskaya had served 10-day sentences earlier. Unfortunately, these are just some recent examples of a longstanding pattern of the Lukashenka regime's flouting of its OSCE commitments and continued disregard for the four OSCE criteria set forth three years ago by the Parliamentary Troika for Belarus.
Despite steps by the OSCE community, including the re-opening of the OSCE Office in Miensk (albeit under a more limited mandate), the seating of the National Assembly and the lifting of a visa ban, not only have reciprocal steps not been taken by the Belarusian authorities but the situation has indeed deteriorated further.
Earlier this year, I introduced H.R. 854, the Belarus Democracy Act, designed to assist the people of Belarus in regaining their freedom and enable them to join the European community of democracies. Key provisions of this Act also have been incorporated into the Foreign Relations Reauthorization bill. Mr. Speaker, the Lukashenka regime's continuing suppression of the longsuffering Belarusian people underscores the need for the Belarus Democracy Act and other efforts–including within the OSCE–to restore respect for human rights and institutions of democratic governance.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
Gluten-free gingersnap stars- a classic holiday cookie. |
This time of year simply begs for gingersnaps- the classic and humble cookie that tastes old fashioned and elegant and post new wave all at once. A subtle, spicy, gingery bite that snaps with a crunch to awaken satiated taste buds soaked in a holiday sea of egg nog, cheese logs and peanut butter balls.
Fancy cookies, these are not.
Slathered with green icing and star sprinkles?
Not exactly.
Though, you could, I suppose. Slather these. And sprinkle with abandon.
If you're of a mindset that more is more, and nurture not the minimalist mantra of Less.
The choice is yours.
Go old fashioned and let the gingersnap goodness tingle on its own.
Or go wild.
And get your frosting on.
It's your party.
Cooling on the rack- ginger spiced vegan cookies in cut out shapes. |
Karina's Wheat-Free Gluten-Free Gingersnaps Recipe
The dough for these gluten-free gingersnaps lends itself beautifully to rolling out and cutting into shapes. Usually vegan gluten-free dough is finicky. But I found it surprisingly easy to roll out- with a simple technique we use for making crackers. The cut-outs were tricky to move, though. But don't fret. I have a method to bypass that horror (cookie shapes breaking into sad little twisted lumps).
1 cup sorghum flour
1 cup tapioca starch/flour
1/2 cup hazelnut flour or almond flour
1 cup light brown sugar
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
1/4 teaspoon fine sea salt
1 1/4 teaspoons xanthan gum
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 cup Earth Balance Sticks, or Spectrum Organic Shortening
1/4 cup unsulphured molasses
4 tablespoons coconut milk (or non-dairy milk)
Supplies you'll need:
A large baking sheet. An Exopat or Silpat. Plastic wrap. A rolling pin. Cookie cutters.
Preheat the oven to 350ºF.
Whisk together the dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl.
Use a whisk attachment or pastry cutter to cut in the shortening and molasses. The mixture will be sandy and crumbly.
Add the coconut milk one tablespoon at a time.
Mix after each spoonful to keep a close eye on the consistency. You don't want the dough too sticky. It should still appear somewhat crumbly- but- when you pinch the dough it should stick together and feel like cookie dough. I used four tablespoons of So Delicious coconut milk to get to this consistency.
Divide the dough in half. Wrap one half in plastic wrap and pop it in the fridge to chill while you work with the other half.
Note: If the dough seems too soft and warm- chill all of it for an hour to improve the rolling out process.
Split the half dough ball in two.
Place the Exopat liner on the counter. Put the dough in the center, and using your palms, lightly press the dough into a flattish round shape.
How does the dough feel? If it's warm or very soft you may need to chill it before working with it. If it feels sturdy and pliable, proceed.
Cut a swath of plastic wrap the size of the Exopat and lay it on top of the dough. Use a rolling pin to roll out the cookie dough evenly. The plastic wrap makes this super easy. When the dough is evenly 1/4 inch thick, pull off the plastic and save it for the next batch.
Use cookie cutters or juice glasses to cut shapes into the dough- not too close together. Do not move the shapes you cut. You are just cutting the dough.
Carefully pull away the pieces of dough surrounding the cookie shapes, leaving the cookie shape itself on the Exopat (I used a butter knife to help me do this).
When you're done you'll have a sheet of shapes ready to bake!
Roll up the excess dough to reuse.
Place the baking sheet next to the Exopat liner and gently move the liner with cookies onto the baking sheet.
Bake in the center of a preheated oven for 8 to 10 minutes.
Note: Use this first sheet as a trial run to see your best baking time. The thinner the cookie the faster it will bake. Mine were ready at 8 minutes.
These gingersnaps crisp as they cool. So if you like a chewy, tender ginger cookie, bake for less time, say 7 to 8 minutes. If you prefer them crunchy gingersnap style, bake them at least 8 minutes, up to 9 minutes- if they aren't rolled very thin. Remember the thinner they are the faster the bake. For thicker cookies, bake up to 10 minutes- but remember, these really do crisp as they cool to room temperature, so experiment with timing.
When the cookies have firmed up and are cooled enough to handle, remove them to a wire rack to continue to cool and crisp up.
Repeat the process for the remaining cookie dough.
Note: If you bake two sheets at a time, your baking time may vary from mine. I baked one sheet in the center. Rotate the pans to help with even baking.
When the cookies are cool, divide them up and store them in sandwich bags, inside a large freezer bag. Freeze for maximum taste and texture preservation.
Makes 3 to 4 dozen cookies, depending upon the size of the cut-outs.
Gingersnaps and cold coconut milk- vegan bliss. |
I made half the batch as classic gingersnaps- small round snaps of gingery goodness. Perfect for dunking in ice cold coconut milk. I rolled the dough out slightly thicker and used an espresso cup, and have a delightfully tender, chewy center.
I bagged and froze extras for easy take-along treats. I tuck them in my purse. They're fabulous with a soy chai latte. Just sayin'.
Vegan gingersnap moons and stars for the holidays. |
Recipe Notes:
Use fresh spices. Not last year's. These cookies shine with spicy flavor, so don't use stale spices you've had kicking around since Santa Clause was a kid.
For those of you avoiding nut flours, I suggest trying your favorite medium weight gluten-free flour as a substitute for the hazelnut flour. The hazelnut flour is slightly sweet and nutty. So you'll want to replace it with a good tasting flour- not a bean flour.
For subbing the coconut milk, any non-dairy milk will work- but again, choose a good tasting sub. I think any nut milk or rice milk should work. Choose a vanilla milk for added flavor.
For subbing the organic shortening, I find oil sometimes problematic in cookie recipes, so I'm not sure I'd recommend using oil. Perhaps a solid coconut oil or vegan stick margarine. If you are not vegan, and use butter, that will work.
Why I use an Exopat or Silpat- a silicone liner for the baking sheet- I find that gluten-free cookies will too often spread, and brown too much if baked directly on a baking sheet. Unless you use a sheet with "cushioned air"- those really slow down the baking time.
These are a pleasantly crisp gingersnap-style cookie. If you frost them with icing, it will soften the cookie. So if you prefer a softer cookie- ice these.
Perfect for tea. Or a bedtime snack. Gotta love gingersnaps. |


text:
A woman in Boston saw something white fall past her second floor window Wednesday afternoon "and ran to see what it was," according to the Boston Globe.
Turns out it was Sugar the cat, who had plunged to the ground from an apartment on the 19th floor.
Don't panic, everyone. Sugar is OK. Just some bruising of her lungs, according to the Animal Rescue League of Boston.
It helped, according to the Globe, that Sugar landed "on a soft patch of grass and mulch."
But as ABC News' 20/20 has explained, there's also been research done that indicates a cat may be better off falling from a high place than a relatively low one. It's called "high rise syndrome."
"Apparently," 20/20 reported, "cats that fall farther are able to spread their bodies like feline parachutes to slow themselves down." Then they land, of course, on their feet.
Want to see how a cat falls, in slow motion, and learn more about high rise syndrome? Check this video from National Geographic.
Sugar, by the way, was reunited with her owner thanks to a microchip embedded under her skin. The owner had been at work when Sugar took to the sky.
(H/T to the Globe, which used "purrfectly" in its headline before we could.)
Copyright 2021 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.


text:
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
In honour of "Clean Out Your Inbox Week," we've decided to respond to a few of those emails here.
Dear Jen and John,
I've had a hard week! With my in-laws coming to visit and my water breaking, I've had no time to myself! I finally found solitude when I locked myself in the bathroom for six hours on Saturday and read through the Cake Wrecks archives on my laptop. (Had to stop when Aunt Tilda had to go "Number Twosies.") Just wanted to say thanks for the laughs and also ask how do you keep from getting stressed out?
Crying tears of joy,
Dear Matthew,
I assume you meant to write that your water "heater" broke. However, we recently found ourselves in a similar situation when family came to visit over the holidays (only we chose to lock ourselves in the closet, not the bathroom). We restored our sanity by relaxing, meditating, and focusing on the love we have for each other.
And we also got drunk and ate lots of chocolate.
Don't forget to flush,
john (the hubby of Jen)
Dear Cake Wrecks,
While I generally consider myself a "humorous" person, I must admit I was deeply offended by a recent joke you made on your site. There is nothing at all funny in this punchline:
As the dealer for the Vegan Underwater Polish Canasta Team, I think you should consider your readers who hold the Joker in high regard. It is not a joke, Cake Wrecks. It is one of the most important cards in the deck.
Unfollowing. It's been fun.
Hi Betty,
We apologize for offending you and the other members of the Vegan Underwater Polish Canasta Team. We realize the Joker can be very important and will be sure to reference it in a higher regard next time we feature a wrecked playing card cake.
We plan to post the following cake next week and we sincerely hope your team won't be offended.
All the best-
Number One
Dear friend,
Please vote for my cat Smuckers in the Kennel Treats "Cutest Pet Sweepstakes!" The more votes my cat gets, the more chance we have to win! So vote often, and forward this email to all your friends!!
Vote now!!!
-Jeanna and Smuckers
Dear Jeanna,
Though we appreciate your interest and highly personalized e-mail, I'm afraid we get too many requests for online votes to grant ours to little Smuckers.
Plus we thought this guy was cuter:
Best of luck anyway!
-CW Team
Our deepest thanks to readers Fifi B., Theresa K., Jennifer D., Emily P., and Roberta for sending us emails with photos of cakes in them... and not just asking us to claim our winnings in the Euro Millions email promotion.
67 comments | Post a Comment
- Stephanie said...
You had me going with the first one... and then I saw the second 'email'. *snickers* Nice. ;)
- January 27, 2011 at 9:53 AM
- Classic Steve said...
"Jen, John and I"? Who's speaking?
Mmm, possum pastry. - January 27, 2011 at 9:59 AM
The Joker and that . . . um, opossum (?) are now fighting it out for top billing in my nightmares tonight.
Can anyone figure out what was used for the hairs on that thing? All I can think is that it's actually -- well, hairs!
:::shudder::: - January 27, 2011 at 10:00 AM
- The Angry Jackalope said...
What is the "fur" on the possum made of? Sparkly yarn? I probably don't want to know.
- January 27, 2011 at 10:04 AM
- Jessica said...
WV: dedish
That people on that first cake look sort of dedish to me. The rat is not dedish enough. - January 27, 2011 at 10:11 AM
Awesome theme today! Love it. You should have more issues on a regular basis. Once a month? I could not wait to take my am cakewrecks break today.
ps.. I also am wondering what was used as hair for that opossum cake.. or is it a rat? I cannot imagine getting a piece of that one. - January 27, 2011 at 10:17 AM
- MyCatsRule said...
Before I clicked on the first photo for a closeup, I thought the bride was an Always pad. I was trying to figure out the significance. Given some of the cakes you feature, it didn't really surprise me, just puzzled me.
WV: undises - Your writing + these wrecks = PMLOL so hard I have to change my undises - January 27, 2011 at 10:27 AM
- Danger Boy said...
That possum-rat-ROUS-thing is disgustifying!
- January 27, 2011 at 10:28 AM
- BADKarma! said...
I keep looking behind me now, to make sure that opossum cake isn't sneaking up on me. Geesh.
WV - mudism: A recently-developed religion among wreckorators. One of the basic tennets of Mudism is "When rendering creepy vermin in cake, thou shalt cover them in dyed coconut and glitter powder, for 'realism's' sake". - January 27, 2011 at 10:30 AM
- Elizabeth said...
What's the uh....white thing on the first cake. I must admit it looks a bit like a used...um...something.
- January 27, 2011 at 10:40 AM
Totally didn't realize that the white blobish thing next to the groom was the bride...I thought it was a huge lake of vomit.
- January 27, 2011 at 10:43 AM
WV: rophies (close enuff!)
Guy on the first cake was slipped some rophies. He won't remember the drinking, the puking, or the coma. - January 27, 2011 at 10:44 AM
I was a little confused reading Matthew's email. I was wondering how he had time to read in the bathroom for 6 hours after his water broke. I thought he was a pregnant woman (and therefore in labor)--until I saw his name.
Matt, dude, words MATTER. (Yesterday, reviewing 7-year-old's quiz on some Indians, she wrote they were really good at "craving" and "panting." (instead of carving and painting, as in totem poles.) We had a whole other image in mind! My husband started doing craving and panting impressions.
Kinda reminds me of the Jack Daniels cake. That must have been SOME wedding btw. the beloved bride and groom passed out drunk on the floor and all the guests gone. gotta love the ring o' beer bottles around the perimter and the delicately balanced JD bottled on top. classy.
the Polish Underwater Canasta team was joking, right? meanwhile, the Joker is terrifying, like a psychotic serial killer cannibal (who didn't wipe his mouth) wearing a headpiece with ax blades. *SHUDDER* *curls up in a ball and sucks her thumb in terror*
clown, vampire, who can tell?
the cartoon cat looks like it's wearing a rennaissance collar, and the rat/possum is the most unappetizing thing I've seen in weeks! Hair? ears? what are they made of? yikes.
now I really want to see the dong cake. I'll have to send you an email ;)
wv: nuedis. apparently what the dong cake was. - January 27, 2011 at 10:53 AM
- Loo-E Loo-I said...
Wow, you've sent 300 emails so far?
That is one funny groom's cake! I kinda like it.
Don't forget to flush *snort* Nice intro for the next cake! Royal flush *ba-da bum* Geez, they took the K,Q and J off of the "cards" so they could decorate that part themselves, but left the A and 10.
Yikes! That joker cake has been weighed, has been measured, and has been found wanting...
Why is the kitty wearing a little mask?
I'm with everyone else...dear God what is that thing's hair made from? {{{shudder}}} It looks like a R.O.U.S to me.
I think Mr. Floopers is the winner!
wv: gabitong: *singing* Get it on...gabitong...get it on - January 27, 2011 at 10:59 AM
- Caroline B said...
I had to Google possums to see what they look like without a raging case of the mange...what IS that hair made of, wire wool?
- January 27, 2011 at 11:26 AM
- popcorn said...
huh its rat cant eat:)
- January 27, 2011 at 11:32 AM
- Gary said...
By the way, when ARE you going to send me that uncensored German dong cake picture?
- January 27, 2011 at 11:33 AM
OH...that opossum cake at the end is making me turn off of cake for awhile. Thankfully, I have cookies.
- January 27, 2011 at 11:34 AM
- Donna said...
Gosh! I hope that opossum isn't too cold with it having mange and going bald and all....
- January 27, 2011 at 11:38 AM
- January 27, 2011 at 11:49 AM
I am who thinks the "kitty" one looks a lot like the sidekick cat on Thundercats the cartoon? The large ears, white face? No, only me?
Thanks Jen, John and I for all the great laughs - wouldn't miss a day.
wv: frustes: I get frustes8ed on Saturday when there are no Cake Wrecks to view. - January 27, 2011 at 11:51 AM
- Unknown said...
So, just for the confused person I am. Who exactly is Number 1?
And the post is hysterical, as usual!
Heidi - January 27, 2011 at 11:52 AM
An R.O.U.S. Cake! Scary and awesome all at once! Love the letters! Amazing as usual!
- January 27, 2011 at 12:00 PM
That must be a Twilight vampire possum.
- January 27, 2011 at 12:11 PM
- Amy said...
Good Gracious, is that first one a wedding cake! bleh!
And that opossum thing made me throw up a little in my mouth...shudder - January 27, 2011 at 12:11 PM
The first one would drive anyone to drink.
#2 All of the 'cards' are edible (I hope) prints. Of course, the whole picture-on-cake thing rather pushes the definition of 'edible', if I were to be asked.
#3 There have been so many interpretations of 'The Joker' over the years that 'Vince Furnier really ought to hang it up, now' doesn't seem too bad. The wreckerator might have left just a few millimeters for writing a message, though.
#4 Proof that something with a name like 'Smuckers' doesn't have to be good. Or even recognizable -- it looks like a clown bandit.
#5 So there really is 'rat cake'. Appalling. Fits right in with all the Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam that you 'guys' receive, though. (Yes, it could be interpreted as an opossum, EPCOT denizens, but 'opossum' doesn't fit nearly as well. After all, how many opossum jokes are there?)
In the interest of not needing to swallow my most recent meal more than once, I'll stipulate that the 'hair' is spun sugar. What a huge amount of work for... that.
@Loo-E Loo-I, wasn't 'Get it On' first recorded by T-Wrecks? Well, I guess today's soundtrack is set -- thank you very little. ;-) - January 27, 2011 at 12:22 PM
KatyChrista, I thought the same as you about pregnant Matthew giving birth in the bathroom while reading CakeWrecks. That's....a highly improbable image.
As for the critter in the last cake, I'm fairly sure it's supposed to be a naked mole rat, not an opossum.
wv: indows. The bride indows me with a sense of security that their marriage will last until they are sober. - January 27, 2011 at 12:31 PM
It can be hard to tell a rat from a possum. One friend of mine, raised in the Chicago area, saw a possum by his trash one day after he moved to Indiana, and his first thought was that "They grow them really big here."
Neither, however, should be made into a cake.
I hereby propose a rule: If you wouldn't normally eat it, don't make a cake out of it. - January 27, 2011 at 12:32 PM
Is it me or are the bathroom and sexual innuendo jokes increasing on this blog? Still funny and enjoyable but sometimes I feel like I'm reading it on a third grade playground.
- January 27, 2011 at 12:34 PM
- Mary Connealy said...
Is that a RAT CAKE????????????
(joke) - January 27, 2011 at 12:41 PM
- Barbara Jo said...
Woohoo! My third time of Cake Wrecks! The evil rat (which, I admit, could easily be mistaken for an opossum) is just part of my Killer Rats Cake. You can see the whole thing at http://www.doitmyself.org/2005/05/killer-rats-cake.html, but use caution, since that is actually the healthiest-looking of the three rats on the cake. Oh, and the rats are eating a severed human arm.
In answer to everyone's question, the fur is made of spun sugar, painted with an airbrush. - January 27, 2011 at 12:43 PM
- Loo-E Loo-I said...
Yes, this rendition is by T-Wrecks! :-D
I did a search of spun sugar images and low & behold the rat cake shows up there (blech). Well, thank you very little for that ;-D
Eww now I feel like I got hair in my mouth...blech! - January 27, 2011 at 12:51 PM
Having attended college on a scholarship provided by the local Vegan Underwater Polish Canasta Club, I can't tell you how offended I am. Or how great it is to see them get some publicity. Whichever.
- January 27, 2011 at 12:56 PM
- TisforTonya said...
that last one may have been edible before it spent the afternoon in the hair salon attracting the hair clippings... but I wouldn't bet on it.
- January 27, 2011 at 12:57 PM
on the r.o.u.s., is it tinsel? because it kinda looks like tinsel...
really, though, who *doesn't* want a mouthful of tinseled icing?
-arnie - January 27, 2011 at 12:58 PM
- Chriss said...
The frightening thing about that Joker cake is that it's actually PERFECT when you consider the particular fictional sociopath it depicts. I don't think you can really call that one a wreck, considering. ;)
- January 27, 2011 at 1:16 PM
Happy "Chocolate Cake Day"! Yes, apparently it's a real thing. Who knew. This is a made up holiday I plan to fully celebrate.
Cakefully Yours,
Megan - January 27, 2011 at 1:21 PM
- Christina said...
Keep up the great work you guys!! Love my CW break.... used to be a CW coffee break until I had to replace my monitor from spraying it with mouthfuls of coffee :-P
WV: forofl - found oscar rolling over flat lillies - January 27, 2011 at 1:57 PM
Barbara Jo said...
>> In answer to everyone's question, the fur is made of spun sugar, painted with an airbrush.<<
Well, that's good to know!
I went to the site -- I'm not surprised to hear that you had to model the evil rats after a toy -- real ones are pretty cute.
wv - cration.
That may be the scariest cake in cration! - January 27, 2011 at 2:21 PM
- Rebecca said...
The last cake reminds me of 'The Princess Bride', which I am currently watching. The oversized rat-wrestling scene came on as I scrolled down to the last cake.
- January 27, 2011 at 2:25 PM
@Oldish Lady: a good rule!
@Heidi: Number 1 is also named Jen and she helps Jen (and John) with this blog.
@Craig-- good catch with T-wrecks!
My sympathies on all the email you get. All in addition to having to moderate 80-400 comments each day? (oops, I guess I don't help with that, do I?). Yikes! At least you manage to keep up your sense of humour :) You guys always know how to cheer me up even when having a bad... month.
As for the cakes:
#1 You know your lifestyle needs improvement when you think that's appropriate for a wedding and an accurate reflection of yourselves -- passed out, with icing that looks like vomit, surrounded by bottles. I don't think Jack Daniels will be using this in their advertising... but AA should! And if they're not flipped into recovery position, maybe the local funeral home, too.
And Matthew, with his water, may explain something about yesterday's cake ::grin::
#2 Well, I don't think that cake is wrecky enough to qualify for CW. But that email is!
#3 That's a BIRTHDAY cake?! Good thing the recipient is old enough not to have nightmares for the next 24 years (good thing they weren't Canadian, or else the cake would be along the lines of Cake #1...)
#4 Never received an email like that. But I can see with a pet looking like that, they'd need all the votes they can get! Especially from the blind Lithuanian euchre team!
#5 Beady glassy eyes, sparkly stringy fur, stick-on ears... yikes, that's a cake? What on earth did that person do to deserve that? And what IS that fur on that rat/whatever?! ::shudder:: - January 27, 2011 at 2:55 PM
- E said...
So amazingly enough I had to click on the link to the don't cake for I had somehow forgotten about it. After wiping away the tears from laughing so hard and reading through some of the comments I noticed a very helpful comment. Someone had mentioned you should have put a smiley face over the reflection also. So of course I scrolled.back up to the pick and....well I won't need to email you for the uncensored photo... Today's post was terrific! The ratopossum is just what I had wanted for a grooms cake! Could it have come in gray though?
wv: funter. Could the R.O.U.S. cake be more funter? If it could be, guess we'll all just have to wonder. - January 27, 2011 at 3:18 PM
@Barbara Jo... I'm not sure whether to be in awe of your talent (and incredible patience), or frightened ;)
PS that severed arm sounds delicious! And the cupcakes were cute - January 27, 2011 at 3:22 PM
Nice use of those small chocolate liquor bottles stuck to the side of a cake. I bet I can even do that! Rat whatever cake is gross!!! But, it won't stop me from eating cake. lol
- January 27, 2011 at 3:41 PM
- Lady Bright said...
Okay. Now I need the chocolate, Jack Daniels and a closet.
Oh, and "oldish Lady" -- you obviously live in town... we DO eat possum out here. So as a cake... by your rules... it's a go. Eww.
wv - ducleu -- I have not even one clue, how do you come up with ducleu on what these CWs were really meant for? - January 27, 2011 at 3:57 PM
- Lady Bright said...
While showing dh the cakes... I did notice that no one picked the Epcot, that the first cake with dead drunk bride and groom is obviously the groom's cake, the bride's being to the left.
~~Di - January 27, 2011 at 3:59 PM
did you know opossums only have a 2 year life span?
looks like that opossum was made from several dead ones. gross. - January 27, 2011 at 4:48 PM
- Nash Nordin said...
That joker really creeps me out.
- January 27, 2011 at 5:13 PM
@Barbara Jo...
The rat cake on your link is AMAZING. Disgustingly, repulsively amazing. The rats are great, and the arm with the internal bones, is just genius. So much effort obviously went into the whole process.
If it wasn't so gross, it'd definitely deserve to be a sunday sweet! - January 27, 2011 at 5:21 PM
First cake=lolol funny for a groom cake
Joker/batman cake-not a bad idea, just needed better execution.
Last Cake D: - January 27, 2011 at 10:06 PM
- Craig said...
80 - 400 incoming per day?! I'm guessing submissions add to the total. Thanks for the factoid, @Aliza -- I had been wondering.
Having seen the comment section of other sites (which are moderated to much looser standards, if at all), I can guess what kinds of things don't make the cut. It must be doubly hard to be consistently funny when you have to wade through the muck that is out there.
CW team, a kudos to each of you. - January 27, 2011 at 10:36 PM
- Jared said...
Great blog. Curious to know how you have attracted so many readers to your blog. I started a humorous blog and am looking to get more readers to look at it but not sure how. Any help from you would be great.
- January 28, 2011 at 12:49 AM
>>Jen, John and I get billions of emails every day<<
Based on this, I would say that #1 is Carl Sagan! :)
And, as my mother always says "I've told you a million times to stop exaggerating!" - January 28, 2011 at 12:55 AM
Lmao. I wish my email was half as interesting. I keep getting offers from a Nigerian prince to take his money. Sadly I never respond to such blatant idiocy lol but those cakes..wow.
- January 28, 2011 at 1:27 AM
These are some of the wreckiest cakes I've seen so far on this site. I actually jumped back from the screen when I saw the rat-thing cake.
- January 28, 2011 at 2:16 AM
- KatzenMama said...
Oh dear, that possum is truly hideous. Or else really great, because it looks so real. Thanks for all the laughs...your blog keeps me amused for hours on end.
- January 28, 2011 at 2:33 AM
- escalante blogger said...
Jack Daniels with cake. I can't take it.. (Just kidding) :-)
- January 28, 2011 at 7:30 AM
@Craig-- just want to make it clear that that was a complete guess, based on the comments different posts have, with a few extra that I presume aren't published. So this post (and other relatively low-comment ones) is at 60-ish published + 20 for eliminated by the moderator = 80. And then there were the super popular ones, not counting that contest.
I'll leave it to John or someone else with CW to give the official range... my guess probably is less factoid and more truthiness! - January 28, 2011 at 8:51 AM
Aliza and Craig,
Here are some numbers from the last two weeks:
Lowest number of comments- 50
Average- 90
Highest- 178
Number we have to reject for language- <1 a day
Number of spam we have to reject- >10
Highest number of comments ever- 2,273 on Five awesome things
Number of cake submissions a day- about 50
As an avid reader of the internets, I'm extremely proud of the fact that our readers keep the boards so civil.
You guy rock absolutely.
john - January 28, 2011 at 9:05 AM
No, John, YOU rock!
and PS, for those of you who don't know. #1 is a reference to Star Trek-Next Gen. Cpt Pickard often called his first officer #1 when giving a command. - January 28, 2011 at 10:34 AM
- terri c said...
Naked mole rat? My skin is still twitching. It is a work of demented genius.
- January 28, 2011 at 2:17 PM
Is that last one a Rodent of Unusual Size? As horrid as it is, I might actually understand why someone would want the cake if that were the case...
- January 28, 2011 at 10:57 PM
I think people who make these cakes are somehow related to people who paint on velvet. I keep asking myself - WHY????
- January 29, 2011 at 12:14 AM
- My name is Michelle. said...
I made the mistake of reading this post at 11:45 pm. Now I am going to have nightmares. I'm not sure if the nightmares will just be about possums or if they will involve hairy cake. Maybe it will be raw hide dog treats and cake. I guess there are just too many ways that last cake can haunt me. I'm now going to read horror stories in bed in the hopes of removing that vision from my mind.
- January 29, 2011 at 1:50 AM
I love yall but that possum cake made this Southern girl gag. That's worse than a bleeding armadillo groom's cake....
- January 29, 2011 at 8:26 AM
- ShinyGreenApple said...
Rodents of Unusual Size? I don't think they ex-- AAAUUUGGGH!
Is it bad that I find the Jack Daniels wedding cake kind of funny? - January 30, 2011 at 9:19 PM
- Unknown said...
My five year old daughter just started crying. She needs reassurance that nobody actually ate that, and that it was in fact just a rodent, and not a cake.
- February 15, 2011 at 1:19 PM
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SASTRA follows choice-based credit system, where students are free to choose their courses and faculty. Our Curriculum gets revamped from time to time through feedbacks from students, industry and government. Teaching at SASTRA is not just filling the students with information through a transmittive process. The students are transformed into active learners through the mechanics of learning. Students are encouraged to carry out mini-projects and participate in national level technical design competitions. Student groups are encouraged to make presentations, engage in role plays, conduct field studies and share experiences, and innovate on new experiments for laboratory work. SASTRA follows the credit system for evaluating students whose performance is measured by the Cumulative Grade Point Average (CGPA).
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Haskell Monoids and their Uses
This post is literate Haskell so you can play with the examples directly.
Defining Monoids
In Haskell, a monoid is a type with a rule for how two elements of that type can be combined to make another element of the same type. To be a monoid there also needs to be an element that you can think of as representing 'nothing' in the sense that when it's combined with other elements it leaves the other element unchanged.
A great example is lists. Given two lists, say [1,2] and [3,4], you can join them together using ++ to get [1,2,3,4]. There's also the empty list []. Using ++ to combine [] with any list gives you back the same list, for example []++[1,2,3,4]==[1,2,3,4].
Another example is the type of integers, Integer. Given two elements, say 3 and 4, we can combine them with + to get 7. We also have the element 0 which when added to any other integer leaves it unchanged.
So here is a possible definition for the monoid type class:
class Monoid m where
mappend :: m -> m -> m
mempty :: m
The function mappend is the function we use to combine pairs of elements, and mempty is the 'nothing' element. We can make lists an instance like this:
instance Monoid [a] where
mappend = (++)
mempty = []
Because we want mempty to do nothing when combined with other elements we also require monoids to obey these two rules
a `mappend` mempty = a
mempty `mappend` a = a.
Notice how there are two ways to combine a and b using mappend. We can write a `mappend` b or b `mappend` a. There is no requirement on a monoid that these be equal to each other. (But see below.) But there is another property that monoids are required to have. Suppose we start with the list [3,4]. And now suppose we want to concatenate it with [1,2] on the left and [5,6] on the right. We could do the left concatenation first to get [1,2]++[3,4] and then form ([1,2]++[3,4])++[5,6]. But we could do the right one first and get [1,2]++([3,4]++[5,6]). Because we're concatenating at opposite ends the two operations don't interfere and it doesn't matter which we do first. This gives rise to the third and last requirement we have of monoids:
(a `mappend` b) `mappend` c == a `mappend` (b `mappend` c)
and you can summarise it with the slogan 'combining on the left doesn't interfere with combining on the right'. Notice how the integers, combined with +, also have this property. It's such a useful property it has a name: associativity.
That's a complete specification of what a monoid is. Haskell doesn't enfore the three laws I've given, but anyone reading code using a monoid will expect these laws to hold.
Some Uses of Monoids
But given that we already have individual functions like ++ and +, why would we ever want to use mappend instead?
One reason is that with a monoid we get another function called mconcat for free. mconcat takes a list of values in a monoid and combines them all together. For example mconcat [a,b,c] is equal to a `mappend` (b `mappend` c). Any time you have a monoid you have this quick and easy way to combine a whole list together. But note that there is some ambiguity in the idea behind mconcat. To compute mconcat [a,b,...,c,d] which order should we work in? Should we work from left to right and compute a `mappend` b first? Or should we start with c `mappend` d. That's one place where the associativity law comes in: it makes no difference.
Another place where you might want to use a monoid is in code that is agnostic about how you want to combine elements. Just as mconcat works with any monoid, you might want to write your own code that works with any monoid.
Explicitly using the Monoid type class for a function also tells the reader of your code what your intentions are. If a function has signature [a] -> b you know it takes a list and constructs an object of type b from it. But it has considerable freedom in what it can do with your list. But if you see a function of type (Monoid a) => a -> b, even if it is only used with lists, we know what kind of things the function will do with the list. For example, we know that the function might add things to your list, but it's never going to pull any elements out of your list.
The same type can give rise to a monoid in different ways. For example, I've already mentions that the integers form a monoid. So we could define:
instance Monoid Integer where
mappend = (+)
mempty = 0
But there's a good reason not to do that: there's another natural way to make integers into a monoid:
instance Monoid Integer where
mappend = (*)
mempty = 1
We can't have both of these definitions at the same time. So the Data.Monoid library doesn't make Integer into a Monoid directly. Instead, it wraps them with Sum and Product. It also does so more generally so that you can make any Num type into a monoid in two different ways. We have both
Num a => Monoid (Sum a)
Num a => Monoid (Product a)
To use these we wrap our values in the appropriate wrapper and we can then use the monoid functions. For example mconcat [Sum 2,Sum 3,Sum 4] is Sum 9, but mconcat [Product 2,Product 3,Product 4] is [Product 24].
Using Sum and Product looks like a complicated way to do ordinary addition and multiplication. Why do things that way?
The Writer Monad
You can think of monoids as being accumulators. Given a running total, n, we can add in a new value a to get a new running total n' = n `mappend` a. Accumulating totals is a very common design pattern in real code so it's useful to abstract this idea. This is exactly what the Writer monad allows. We can write monadic code that accumulates values as a "side effect". The function to perform the accumulation is (somewhat confusingly) called tell. Here's an example where we're logging a trace of what we're doing.
> import Data.Monoid
> import Data.Foldable
> import Control.Monad.Writer
> import Control.Monad.State
> fact1 :: Integer -> Writer String Integer
> fact1 0 = return 1
> fact1 n = do
> let n' = n-1
> tell $ "We've taken one away from " ++ show n ++ "\n"
> m <- fact1 n'
> tell $ "We've called f " ++ show m ++ "\n"
> let r = n*m
> tell $ "We've multiplied " ++ show n ++ " and " ++ show m ++ "\n"
> return r
This is an implementation of the factorial function that tells us what it did. Each time we call tell we combine its argument with the running log of all of the strings that we've 'told' so far. We use runWriter to extract the results back out. If we run
> ex1 = runWriter (fact1 10)
we get back both 10! and a list of what it took to compute this.
But Writer allows us to accumulate more than just strings. We can use it with any monoid. For example, we can use it to count how many multiplications and subtractions were required to compute a given factorial. To do this we simply tell a value of the appropriate type. In this case we want to add values, and the monoid for addition is Sum. So instead we could implement:
> fact2 :: Integer -> Writer (Sum Integer) Integer
> fact2 0 = return 1
> fact2 n = do
> let n' = n-1
> tell $ Sum 1
> m <- fact2 n'
> let r = n*m
> tell $ Sum 1
> return r
> ex2 = runWriter (fact2 10)
There's another way we could have written this, using the state monad:
> fact3 :: Integer -> State Integer Integer
> fact3 0 = return 1
> fact3 n = do
> let n' = n-1
> modify (+1)
> m <- fact3 n'
> let r = n*m
> modify (+1)
> return r
> ex3 = runState (fact3 10) 0
It works just as well, but there is a big advantage to using the Writer version. It has type signature f :: Integer -> Writer (Sum Integer) Integer. We can immediately read from this that our function has a side effect that involves accumulating a number in a purely additive way. It's never going to, for example, multiply the accumulated value. The type information tells us a lot about what is going on inside the function without us having to read a single line of the implementation. The version written with State is free to do whatever it likes with the accumulated value and so it's harder to discern its purpose.
Data.Monoid also provides an Any monoid. This is the Bool type with the disjunction operator, better known as ||. The idea behind the name is that if you combine together any collection of elements of type Any then the result is Any True precisely when at least any one of the original elements is Any True. If we think of these values as accumulators then they provide a kind of one way switch. We start accumulating with mempty, ie. Any False, and we can think of this as being the switch being off. Any time we accumulate Any True into our running 'total' the switch is turned on. This switch can never be switched off again by accumulating any more values. This models a pattern we often see in code: a flag that we want to switch on, as a side effect, if a certain condition is met at any point.
> fact4 :: Integer -> Writer Any Integer
> fact4 0 = return 1
> fact4 n = do
> let n' = n-1
> m <- fact4 n'
> let r = n*m
> tell (Any (r==120))
> return r
> ex4 = runWriter (fact4 10)
At the end of our calculation we get n!, but we are also told if at any stage in the calculation two numbers were multiplied to give 120. We can almost read the tell line as if it were English: "tell my caller if any value of r is ever 120". Not only do we get the plumbing for this flag with a minimal amount of code. If we look at the type for this version of f it tells us exactly what's going on. We can read off immediately that this function, as a "side effect", computes a flag that can be turned on, but never turned off. That's a lot of useful information from just a type signature. In many other programming languages we might expect to see a boolean in the type signature, but we'd be forced to read the code to get any idea of how it will be used.
Commutative Monoids, Non-Commutative Monoids and Dual Monoids
Two elements of a monoid, x and y, are said to commute if x `mappend` y == y `mappend` x. The monoid itself is said to be commutative if all of its elements commute with each other. A good example of a commutative monoid is the type of integers. For any pair of integers, a+b==b+a.
If a monoid isn't commutative, it's said to be non-commutative. If it's non-comuutative it means that for some x and y, x `mappend` y isn't the same as y `mappend` x, so mappend and flip mappend are not the same function. For example [1,2] ++ [3,4] is different from [3,4] ++ [1,2]. This has the interesting consequence that we can make another monoid in which the combination function is flip mappend. We can still use the same mempty element, so the first two monoid laws hold. Additionally, it's a nice exercise to prove that the third monoid law still holds. This flipped monoid is called the dual monoid and Data.Monoid provides the Dual type constructor to build the dual of a monoid. We can use this to reverse the order in which the writer monad accumulates values. For example the following code collects the execution trace in reverse order:
> fact5 :: Integer -> Writer (Dual String) Integer
> fact5 0 = return 1
> fact5 n = do
> let n' = n-1
> tell $ Dual $ "We've taken one away from " ++ show n ++ "\n"
> m <- fact5 n'
> tell $ Dual $ "We've called f " ++ show m ++ "\n"
> let r = n*m
> tell $ Dual $ "We've multiplied " ++ show n ++ " and " ++ show m ++ "\n"
> return r
> ex5 = runWriter (fact5 10)
The Product Monoid
Suppose we want to accumulate two side effects at the same time. For example, maybe we want to both count instructions and leave a readable trace of our computation. We could use monad transformers to combine two writer monads. But there is a slightly easier way - we can combine two monoids into one 'product' monoid. It's defined like this:
instance (Monoid a,Monoid b) => Monoid (a,b) where
mempty = (mempty,mempty)
mappend (u,v) (w,x) = (u `mappend` w,v `mappend` x)
Each time we use mappend on the product we actually perform a pair of mappends on each of the elements of the pair. With these small helper functions:
> tellFst a = tell $ (a,mempty)
> tellSnd b = tell $ (mempty,b)
we can now use two monoids simultaneously:
> fact6 :: Integer -> Writer (String,Sum Integer) Integer
> fact6 0 = return 1
> fact6 n = do
> let n' = n-1
> tellSnd (Sum 1)
> tellFst $ "We've taken one away from " ++ show n ++ "\n"
> m <- fact6 n'
> let r = n*m
> tellSnd (Sum 1)
> tellFst $ "We've multiplied " ++ show n ++ " and " ++ show m ++ "\n"
> return r
> ex6 = runWriter (fact6 5)
If we had simply implemented our code using one specific monoid, like lists, our code would be very limited in its application. But by using the general Monoid type class we ensure that users of our code can use not just any individual monoid, but even multiple monoids. This can make for more efficient code because it means we can perform multiple accumulations while traversing a data structure once. And yet we still ensure readability because our code is written using the interface to a single monoid making our algorithms simpler to read.
Foldable Data
One last application to mention is the Data.Foldable library. This provides a generic approach to walking through a datastructure, accumulating values as we go. The foldMap function applies a function to each element of our structure and then accumulates the return values of each of these applications. An implementation of foldMap for a tree structure might be:
> data Tree a = Empty | Leaf a | Node (Tree a) a (Tree a)
> instance Foldable Tree where
> foldMap f Empty = mempty
> foldMap f (Leaf x) = f x
> foldMap f (Node l k r) = foldMap f l `mappend` f k `mappend` foldMap f r
We can now use any of the monoids discussed above to compute properties of our trees. For example, we can use the function (== 1) to test whether each element is equal to 1 and then use the Any monoid to find out if any element of the tree is equal to 1. Here are a pair of examples: one to compute whether or not an element is equal to 1, and another to test if every element is greater than 5:
> tree = Node (Leaf 1) 7 (Leaf 2)
> ex7 = foldMap (Any . (== 1)) tree
> ex8 = foldMap (All . (> 5)) tree
Note, of course, that these expressions can be used, unmodified, with any foldable type, not just trees.
I hope you agree that this expresses our intentions in a way that is easy to read.
That suggests another exercise: write something similar to find the minimum or maximum element in a tree. You may need to construct a new monoid along the lines of Any and All. Try finding both in one traversal of the tree using the product monoid.
The foldable example also illustrates another point. The implementor of foldMap for the tree doesn't need to worry about whether the left tree should be combined with the central element before the right tree. Associativity means it can be implemented either way and give the same results.
Monoids provide a general approach to combining and accumulating values. They allow us to write code that is agnostic about the method we will use to combine values, and that makes our code more reusable. By using named monoids we can write type signatures that express our intentions to people reading our code: for example by using Any instead of Bool we make it clear just how our boolean value is to be used. And we can combine the monoid-based building blocks provided by Haskell libraries to build useful and readable algorithms with a minimum of effort.
Some final notes: mathematicians often refer to mappend as a 'binary operator' and often it's called 'multiplication'. Just like in ordinary algebra, it's often also written with abuttal or using the star operator, ie. ab and a*b might both represent a `mappend` b. You can read more about monoids at Wikipedia. And I wish I had time to talk about monoid morphisms, and why the list monoid is free (and what consequences that might have for how you can your write code), and how compositing gives you monoids and a whole lot more.


text: As I eagerly await a chance to play golf after this particularly long winter, I'm reminded of the anticipation many of us feel about the burgeoning shale industry. That anticipation is particularly high in the U.S. chemical industry, which is seeing significant investment growth and a revolutionary change in the way a key chemical is being produced. Our region has heard the optimistic shale industry employment forecasts. PricewaterhouseCoopers (PwC), for example, released bold numbers in 2011 claiming that by 2025 shale gas could add more than one million workers to the U.S. manufacturing industry while lowering the costs of raw materials and energy by $11.6 billion annually. Even if this forecast falls short, the potential shale holds for the manufacturing sector, Ohio and our national economy is extremely significant. Several industries up and down the shale supply chain are gearing up to take advantage of that opportunity. One major beneficiary is the chemical industry, which is feeling the effects of the potential prevalence of natural gas and "wet gas" natural gas liquids in the Ohio Utica-Point Pleasant shale play. The change occurring in the chemical industry is not simply evolutionary, it's revolutionary. The American Chemical Council (ACC) contends in a December 2012 Financial Times article that "the international chemical industry is undergoing its most profound upheaval in 75 years." Just a few years ago there was hardly any indication of investment in the U.S. chemical industry. Today, more than $55 billion are planned for the development and growth of the U.S. chemical industry. An impetus for the chemical industry revolution is the reduced price of natural gas, which is abundant in shale. The cost decrease has promoted a production increase in ethylene, a first step in the chemical industry value chain. Ethylene can be produced from ethane, which is abundant in the "wet gas" areas of the Ohio Utica-Point Pleasant shale formation. Just a few years ago, ethylene in the U.S. was predominately produced from naphtha, which comes from crude oil. As the price of crude oil increased, the production of ethylene became more expensive. Alternatively, the decrease in cost to produce ethylene from ethane, given our growing supply of domestic natural gas and natural gas liquids, results in a three-to-one cost advantage over many other parts of the world that still depend on naphtha (crude oil) for ethylene. Ethylene is a building block for the chemical industry. Take a look through your cupboards at home or your office supply room. Polyethylene is used in film applications for packaging, carrier bags and trash liners. Ethylene oxide is a key raw material in surfactants and detergents used in products from shampoo and perfume to plastics and adhesives. A presentation at a Carnegie Melon University event titled "Shale Gas: Implications for America's Regional Manufacturing Economies," recently highlighted that shift in the chemical industry. In 2009, Dow Chemical was planning the decommission and demolition of an ethylene facility. Fast forward three years and there are plans to increase U.S. ethylene capacity by 40 percent. These plans include a $3 billion ethylene plant slated for construction in Pennsylvania , about 20 miles from the Ohio border. Ohio's manufacturing and chemical industries will clearly benefit. Ohio is already part of the strong chemical and polymers. The Ohio Chemistry Technology Council contends that chemistry companies in Ohio directly employ 45,865 people and that for every chemistry industry job in Ohio an additional 3.4 jobs are created within the state. Chemical industry jobs earn an average wage of $64,600, which is 24 percent higher than the average manufacturing job. Several polymer companies with headquarters in Northeast Ohio are on Fortune's 1,000 largest companies list. Akron is, after all, known as the "Rubber Capital of the World": • The Goodyear Tire and Rubber Company of Akron is one of the world's leading tire companies and registered $21 billion in sales in 2012. • PolyOne Corporation, headquartered in Avon Lake, reported 2012 revenues of $3 billion. The company is a global provider of specialty polymer materials, services and solutions, with several facilities located throughout Northeast Ohio. • A. Schulman, headquartered in Akron, is a leading international supplier of high-performance plastic compounds and resins, which are used as raw material in a variety of markets. The Company has over 30 manufacturing and support facilities in North and South America, Europe and the Asia-Pacific region. • Parker Hannifin is a $13 billion diversified manufacturer of motion and control technologies and systems headquartered in Mayfield Heights. Its Engineered Polymer Systems Division delivers medical grade thermoplastic polyurethane and thermoplastic elastomer tubing for medical devices that demand precision and consistency. • Owens Corning of Toledo and Cooper Tire of Findlay are other examples of successful Ohio companies that are heavily involved in the chemicals and polymer industry. The current strength and promising outlook for the region's chemical and polymer industry is bolstered by the abundance of natural gas found in shale and the lower ethylene production prices this affords. Ethylene goes into thousands of products that are polymer related and its production from ethane is the first step in the chemical industry value chain. Significantly reduced manufacturing production costs are a major benefit to the region, which can lead to a boost in the economy and good paying jobs for Northeast Ohio.


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Comparable to the maestro of a symphony orchestra blending many unique musical instruments so, when in concert, they produce a beautiful melody, our federally trademarked Crash Proof Retirement Guide orchestrates and blends multiple financial instruments into a finely tuned arrangement that works in concert to satisfy all of your financial goals with preservation of principal as the foundation. The guide provides for division of your assets among various world-renowned, highly rated companies. There are multiple segments and various financial insurance instruments, divided into separate cycles IRA assets and non-qualified assets (non-IRA), all orchestrated together to effectively and efficiently work in concert to achieve your particular goals, providing the guaranteed income you need while potentially growing your portfolio to an amount greater than the original deposits, without being subject to the downside of market risk.
The guide is designed to utilize your assets in a manner providing you with maximum safety of principal while maintaining excellent growth opportunity and the flexibility to alter your income if needed as well as access lump sum amounts in the event of an emergency. The plan has the flexibility to adjust to your desire to maintain direct management over certain assets you would choose.
1-800-722-9728 • Crash Proof Retirement • email@example.com
What are Crash Proof Vehicles?
There are two classes of investments to choose from: Risk-Class and Fixed-Class.
Click here to read about the differences between the Risk-Class and Fixed-Class
Crash Proof Retirement only utilizes investments from the Fixed-Class that contain features that benefit the consumer, not the advisor. For example, in addition to crediting interest and never losing principle, the Crash Proof Vehicles:
- Are protected from Bankruptcy
- Are tax-deferred
- Give you access to your money at any time
- Allow your beneficiaries to receive the investment's full growth at your passing
Crash Proof Vehicles are investment contracts that were created in 1995 and are issued by Insurance companies.
The Wharton School of Business concluded a study in 2010 on the performance of these investment contracts and stated that they couldn't be placed in an existing investment product category. We refer to them as Crash Proof Vehicles due to their hallmark feature of asset growth while never losing investment principal to market risk or recurring fees.
1-800-722-9728 • Crash Proof Retirement • firstname.lastname@example.com
Crash Proof Retirement Consumer-Driven Process
First Senior Financial Group is the only firm in the country with the rights to use the Crash Proof Retirement Strategy. While most other investment companies work with all age groups, our licensed Retirement Educators work exclusively with retirees and are required to attend intense continuing education courses on the details of income planning, tax planning, and estate planning. Typically, the Crash Proof Retirement Consumer-Driven Process requires three appointments; however, our team will be with you every step of the way until you feel comfortable enough to make an informed decision.


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These are wall systems that create good-looking boundaries and can be designed into different types of walls such as acoustic walls, premier walls or grand front walls. They have an antique texture finish that is out rightly distinctive. The rocky look enhances a natural looking landscape making it very attractive.
Most of the estate walls are short in height and can be good for Wills homes and businesses. They are mostly used to indicate the pathway or boundary wall on the gardens, walkways and pathways. They can also be used to make the steps, fireplaces, seat walls, planters, outdoor grills etc.
Estate walls blend naturally with the exterior decor and compliment the landscape. Their beauty offers a visual relief. They are able to dampen high frequency sounds due to their valuable acoustic features. These ensure peaceful businesses, homes and gardens in Wills.
Estate walls can incorporate a variety of ornamental finishes such as lighting, planters, mailboxes assists to exude style. You can customize the finish with your unleashed creativity. Their elegant look helps add the property value.
Estate walls are sturdy meaning they can last for a long time. They are also versatile making them feasible to be used in a wide range of applications of different patterns and styles. The warm and welcoming wall systems are quite easy to construct. The wall panels are of different dimensions and you can choose the ones that suit the requirements of the desired application.
Get the wall panels near your local area and have it installed to enjoy the seamless aged style exuded by the estate walls in Wills.
"The level of service we received was very refreshing. We would recommend them to other customers. Keep up the good work."


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This roasted butternut squash and chickpea salad with tahini dressing has been making its way around the food blogging sphere over the last few months and it has been on my to try list for a while. I figured I had better try to make it soon or else file it away for next year. Luckily I was able to find a small butternut squash and I was all set to make the salad. I pretty much used the recipe as it was though I took the opportunity to try adding a new whole grain that I had wanted to try, wheatberries. Wheat berry is simply wheat that is less processed and has had less removed. The roasted butternut squash and chickpea wheatberry salad turned out quite well. Sweet roasted butternut squash is great all by itself but the creamy and tangy tahini dressing worked really well with it and with the rest of the salad. I enjoyed the nice chewy texture that the wheatberries added to the salad and I am looking forward to using them again. The salad good both still warm from the squash and wheatberries being cooked and chilled from the fridge.
Roasted Butternut Squash and Chickpea Wheatberry Salad
- 1 tablespoon olive oil
- salt and pepper to taste
- 1/2 pound squash (peeled, seeded and cut into bite sized pieces)
- 1 cup wheatberries (cook as directed)
- 1 cup chickpeas (drained and rinsed)
- 1/4 cup red onion (chopped)
- 2 tablespoons cilantro
- 1/4 cup tahini, lemon and yogurt dressing
- Toss the squash in the oil, salt and pepper to coat.
- Bake in a single layer in a preheated 400F/200C oven for 30 minutes flipping once in the middle.
- Mix the squash, chickpeas, red onion and cilantro and top with the dressing.
Tahini, Lemon and Yogurt Dressing
- 2 tablespoons tahini
- 1 tablespoon lemon juice
- 1/4 cup cup Greek yogurt (or regular plain yogurt)
- 1 clove garlic (grated)
- salt and pepper to taste
- * olive oil or water
- Mix everything and add olive oil or water to get it to the desired consistency.


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Even experienced exercisers sometimes find it difficult to know how much to do. For the beginner this uncertainty represents a significant stumbling block. Fortunately well-established guidelines and protocols exist to provide assistance to all exercisers, regardless of your skill level.
In general, the beginning exerciser requires the most instruction. The key is to build up strength and endurance slowly and not do too much too soon. In terms of strength training, the best plan is to determine at what weight you can comfortably perform three sets of eight repetitions. If you can't do three sets of eight reps at the weight you've selected, it's too heavy. If doing three sets of eight reps with the weight you've chosen doesn't feel like anything at all, then the weight is too light. Overall, of course, too light is better than too heavy. The majority of strength training injuries occur when you're attempting to train with an inappropriately heavy weight.
For example, you've selected 15-pound dumbbells with which to perform your bench press routine. You can comfortably do three sets of eight reps. Fifteen pounds is not too light and not too heavy. During the course of your next several weight training sessions, build up to three sets of 12 reps using the 15-pound dumbbells. When you can do three sets of 12 reps successfully, the next time you do your bench press routine you'll increase the weight by approximately 10%. In other words, you'll use the next heaviest weight, which is usually 17.5 pounds in a well-equipped gym. Begin with three sets of eight reps with the 17.5-pound dumbbells, and progress over the next several sessions to three sets of 12 reps. Then you'll repeat the sequence with 20-pound dumbbells, starting at three sets of eight reps and building up to three sets of 12 reps. You'll follow this formula with all of your strength training exercises. In this way, using a safe, smart, and graduated program, you'll consistently build lean muscle mass, gain improved strength and efficiency of your cardiovascular system, and most likely lose several pounds as stored fat is converted to muscle.1
The same principles apply to cardiovascular exercises such as walking, running, biking, and swimming. If you haven't exercised in a very long time, walking is a good method with which to begin.2,3 On your first day, go for a normally paced 10- or 15-minute walk. Don't be concerned that your walk feels like it's over only a few minutes after it's begun. Your main focus should be on getting started, not on how much or how little you're doing in the first few sessions. Over the course of four to six weeks, build up a minute or two each session until you're able to comfortably walk for 30 minutes at a moderate pace. At this point you can begin to increase your pace gradually, building up to a 30- or 40-minute walk at a brisk pace. At this level, you're going a very good, vigorous cardiovascular workout and your heart, lungs, and other components of your cardiorespiratory system are becoming stronger, healthier, and more efficient.
In this gradual, steady, measured way, all exercisers, of whatever age, prior experience, and skill level, can gain a lifetime of benefit from their fitness programs and minimize the likelihood of setbacks or injury.
1Hawkins M, et al: Impact of an exercise intervention on physical activity during pregnancy: the behaviors affecting baby and you study. Am J Public Health 2014 Oct;104(10):e74-81. doi: 10.2105/AJPH.2014.302072. Epub 2014 Aug 14
2Hanson S, Jones A: Is there evidence that walking groups have health benefits? A systematic review and meta-analysis. Br J Sports Med 2015 Jan 19. pii: bjsports-2014-094157. doi: 10.1136/bjsports-2014-094157. [Epub ahead of print] 3Varma VR, et al: Low-intensity daily walking activity is associated with hippocampal volume in older adults. Hippocampus 2014 Dec 7. doi: 10.1002/hipo.22397. [Epub ahead of print]
Regular Chiropractic Care and Injury Prevention
Cardiovascular exercise such as walking, running, biking, and swimming is a necessary component of all exercise programs. But as with all forms of exercise, the possibility for injury exists and must be accounted for. Hamstring, quadriceps, and calf muscle strains are common examples of cardiovascular exercise-related injuries. Low back muscles and ligaments may be injured as well. A complete training program is one that minimizes the likelihood of injury and is supported by regular chiropractic care.
Exercise-related injuries are often the result of faulty biomechanics. Such imbalances put excessive loads on one side of your body versus the other side. As time goes on the overworked side will begin to fail, and injury to the low back or one of the large muscle groups of the leg will occur. Regular chiropractic care detects and corrects spinal misalignments, the primary source of faulty biomechanics. By helping restore and maintain optimal functioning of your spine, regular chiropractic care helps you avoid painful injuries and setbacks in your training program. The result is improved fitness, health, and long-term well-being.


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Grand Theft Auto World
The Grand Theft Auto World is a fictional world containing the settings or otherwise-mentioned locations of all the GTA games (for example, Liberty City, Vice City, Carcer City, and the state of San Andreas). It is assumed that the rest of the real world exists within the fictional world, although possibly without some of the major cities to which the GTA locations are analogous (Liberty City/state of Liberty may replace New York City/state of New York, for example). Continuity is generally retained throughout the games, creating a coherent fictional universe.
A map selection screen in the first Grand Theft Auto game reveals that the contemporary renditions of Liberty City, San Andreas, and Vice City are located in or near New York, California, and Florida respectively. It is unclear whether these locations are canon with the rest of the series, however it is known that Vice City is located in Florida. Furthermore, during one mission in GTA San Andreas, the player could fly a plane eastwards and arrive, after a cut scene, in Liberty City. This relationship is similar to the real-world geographical placing of the states of California and Nevada (upon which San Andreas is based) to New York (upon which Liberty City is based). This does involve crossing a vast body of water, but bodies of water are used to isolate game-worlds in the GTA series, and do not necessarily indicate that these game-worlds are truly islands.
In between game eras, the recurring locations of GTA are represented very differently. Liberty City appeared in Grand Theft Auto 1 and GTA III with almost no similarities other than that they were both broadly based on New York City. Liberty City retained continuity throughout the GTA III Era (compare GTA III's rendition to that of Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories and Grand Theft Auto Advance), however GTA IV introduced a new Liberty City created from scratch.
Featured locations
These cities, islands, states and countries are featured in at least one official Grand Theft Auto game as a playable location. This does not include modifications or locations that just mentioned in-game or shown on an in-game television etc.
Liberty City
Liberty City, based on New York City, is a location that has appeared in GTA 1, GTA III, GTA Vice City, GTA San Andreas, GTA Advance, GTA Liberty City Stories, GTA IV and GTA Chinatown Wars. It is generally depicted as a large city with a sizable population (4 million in GTA III, double that in GTA IV), featuring a complete transportation infrastructure of roads and railways, and is located on a geographical configuration of shorelines and islands, similar to that of New York City. The city has been described as one suffering heavily from crime and corruption, with the presence of organized crime, feuding street gangs, petty criminals, and rampant misconduct among city officials and law enforcement. Due to its ever-growing crime statistics (the highest in the U.S.), it has been repeatedly voted as "The Worst Place In America".
Liberty City is located in the state of Liberty, a parody of the state of New York. It is likely that all the other cities in the real state of New York exist in the state of Liberty. It is unknown if Liberty City is the capital of it's state, after all New York City is not the capital of New York.
New Guernsey/Alderney
New Guernsey, based on New Jersey, is a location that appeared in GTA 1. It consists of Guernsey City (based on Jersey City), Fort Law (Fort Lee), Schlechberg (Gutenberg), Hackenslash (Hackensack) and Eaglewood (Englewood).
In Grand Theft Auto IV, New Jersey was used as a location again, alongside Liberty City, but was renamed to Alderney. Although Alderney is an entire state, it appears to be the size of a borough (about the same size as Algonquin), and is treated as a borough of Liberty City (although this may be due to technical limitations—Alderney foot police, for example, are seen wearing different uniforms to the LCPD, although LCPD vehicles patrol Alderney). Alderney contains neighborhoods that are based on different cities and regions in New Jersey, such as Weehawken, Inglewood, Jersey City, Newark, Kearny, and Elizabeth, among others.
Liberty City in GTA III, showing the Torrington area
Liberty City in GTA IV, showing the City Hall area
Alderney in GTA IV, showing the Alderney City area
Vice City
Vice City is the setting in GTA 1, GTA Vice City and GTA Vice City Stories. It is based on Miami, Florida. In the GTA III era games, it consists of two major islands and six smaller islands; both main islands separated by a large body of water similar to that of Biscayne Bay (separating Miami Beach from mainland Miami). Each major island is divided into several districts. The population of Vice City is given as around 1.8 million. Unlike Liberty City and the state of San Andreas, Vice City has no railway or rapid transit systems, and all islands are connected by road and pedestrian bridges.
In the games, Vice City is based on Miami, but it has been confirmed to be in the real state of Florida, therefore it's possible that Vice City replaces Miami within the GTA World; however, "Miami" was mentioned in a cut scene and various billboards in GTA III, leaving Miami's presence in the GTA world ambiguous at best.
San Andreas
San Andreas, which is intended to be based in the West Coast of the United States, has appeared as four different entities in the Grand Theft Auto (GTA) series of video games.
- In the original Grand Theft Auto, San Andreas is a single city based on the real city of San Francisco, California.
- In Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, San Andreas is a fictionalized American state based on the real states of California and Nevada. San Andreas appears as a series of large islands surrounded by water, but connected by a series of bridges. San Andreas is subdivided into three cites (Los Santos, San Fierro and Las Venturas) and five counties Red County, Flint County, Whetstone, Tierra Robada and Bone County. Details of this incarnation are as follows:
Los Santos is the largest city in San Andreas. It is based on real life Los Angeles, California. It borders Red County to the north and Flint County to the west.
San Fierro is the smallest city in San Andreas, based on San Francisco, California. San Fierro is located in the western part of San Andreas. South of the city lies the massive Mount Chiliad, and to the north lies the county of Tierra Robada. San Fierro Bay lies to the north, and The Panopticon to the east.
Las Venturas is based on Las Vegas, Nevada. Like its real life counterpart, Las Venturas is a gambling city located in the desert region. The city is also notable for its sizable freeway system.
- In Grand Theft Auto V and Grand Theft Auto Online, San Andreas is a fictionalized American state based on California, and possibly Nevada in the same fashion as GTA: San Andreas. Unlike its counterpart in GTA: San Andreas, GTA V only includes Los Santos. This version is also based on Los Angeles, California, and is in the southern end of Los Santos County. To the north is Blaine County, both occupying one main island, with several small islands around it.
Towns There are thirteen small towns in the GTA: San Andreas part of the state, in addition to the cities: Palomino Creek, Montgomery, Dillimore, Blueberry, Angel Pine, El Quebrados, Bayside, Las Barrancas, Fort Carson, Las Payasadas, Valle Ocultado, Aldea Malvada and Las Brujas, (the latter two being ghost towns).
There are six small towns in GTA V in addition to Los Santos: Chumash, Grapeseed, Harmony, North Chumash, Paleto Bay, and Sandy Shores. Harmony and Sandy Shores are desert towns, while Grapeseed and Sandy Shores are on the shores of the Alamo Sea.
Anywhere City
Anywhere City is the setting of Grand Theft Auto 2. It is presumably called this as it is set in the near future, and doesn't bear any resemblance to any real life city in particular. It is divided into three separated parts - Commercial, Residential and Industrial (similar to the nature of the three main districts in GTA III). The infrastructure of Anywhere City is primarily composed of roadways and footpaths, but in later versions of the game released for the PC, a light rail transit system was provided.
London, England, was the city used in both the mission packs available for the original Grand Theft Auto - Grand Theft Auto: London 1969 and Grand Theft Auto: London 1961. Manchester appears as a multi-player map in the second. To date, these are the only real-life cities to be used in a GTA game.
In GTA IV, Gay Tony mentions that he has clubs in London, and some pedestrians in GTA IV have British accents.
North Yankton
North Yankton is a state, based on North Dakota, and is featured in GTA V. It contains the small town of Ludendorff, where the missions Prologue and Bury the Hatchet take place.
Mentioned Locations
These locations do not feature in any GTA game, but are mentioned or shown. These could be mentioned by characters, posters, radio stations, television or anything else.
- Cities/states within the United States of America
- Carcer City is a location featured in Rockstar's Manhunt; references are made to it in various GTA games, suggesting that it exists within the GTA world. According to the 'Miles Traveled' system on the statistical screen on GTA IV, Carcer City is around 50 – 100 miles away from Liberty City.
- Bullworth is the small New England town (possibly New Hampshire) which Bully takes place in. Bullworth Academy is seen on TV in GTA IV.
- Capital City is a city mentioned in the miles traveled stats of GTA IV. It is possibly based on Washington, D.C. (United States Capital) or Albany, NY (New York's Capital).
- Colorado is mentioned in the mission "Farewell 'Chunky' Lee Chong"
- Cottonmouth, Florida is the setting of Rockstar's "Manhunt 2". The Cottonmouth police force makes use of Police Mavericks with similar paint jobs to the VCPD's mavericks. There are also many vehicles from the GTA series seen in the game (such as the Mule, Kuruma, Stinger, and Burrito), also the Majestic Hotel appears. Some fictional medications seen advertised in Manhunt 2 also appear on yourmexicandoctor.com in GTA IV.
- Detroit, Michigan is mentioned on leftover-vacations.com in GTA IV.
- Mars, Alabama is the birthplace of Pastor Richards.
- Miami, Florida - in GTA III there are billboards saying "See you in Miami!", possibly foreshadowing GTA Vice City being based there and Ray Machowski mentions it after his departure from Liberty City. In GTA Vice City, there are billboards that say "Move over Miami!", referencing how Vice City has replaced Miami.
- Reddick, Florida is the town in which the V-Rock radio station is set in 1984.
- Arizona mentioned two times in The Lost and Damned, both times as place for Billy Grey to move over. First time as law abiding citizen and second as witness under witness protection program.
- Minneapolis, Minnesota is mentioned in a radio advertisement for the musical "WTF."
- Kansas is mentioned by pedestrians in GTA Vice City. If the player starts a fight, some may say "This isn't Kansas, you know!".
- North Dakota is the birthplace of Tim.
- Ohio is mentioned on Cluckin' Bell's homepage, and is also were a spin-off of The Science of Crime takes place.
- Iowa is mentioned in a show at Perestroika.
- Atlantic City is mentioned on Kent Paul's 80's Nostalgia Zone website, under the Yuppie and the Alien page.
- Hawaii is mentioned in a Weazel News segment on the radio in GTA IV.
- Silicon Valley is mentioned on some internet pages in GTA IV.
- Rest of the World
- Glasgow, Scotland is mentioned in the Police database as a home town of one of the Most Wanted criminals in GTA IV.
- Kowloon is an area of Hong Kong, mentioned by Wu Zi Mu in the mission Ran Fa Li in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas; it is also the hometown of Huang Lee, the protagonist of Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars.
- Kent, England is the birthplace of Kent Paul.
- Preston, England is mentioned on the GTA IV internet.
- Bogota, Amsterdam, Bangkok, Toronto, Leith and Tokyo are cities mentioned in the official website of GTA III (Francis International Airport); flights are advertised for these cities, as well as to London, San Andreas, Vice City and Miami. Bogota is also mentioned as one of the cities SF-UR broadcasts, as says the electronic voice in one of the trailers ("From Liberty City, to San Fierro, to Bogota: house music, SF-UR.")
- Paris, France and Hanover, Germany are mentioned on Internet pages in GTA IV.
- France is mentioned, and French law enforcement (the GIGN and DGSE) appear in GTA Vice City
- In GTA IV, The Statue of Happiness was given to Liberty City in 1886 from the French to mark 100 years free of British food and spelling. The president of France is requesting during 2008 that the statue be returned, this is in retaliation to American president, Joe Lawton, renaming all french maid outfits as "slutty Halloween costumes".
- The German language exists, as several background characters in GTA IV can be heard saying German phrases like "Scheiße!" (shit!), "Entschuldigung" (excuse me), "Er hat eine Waffe" (he has a gun), "Er will mich töten" (he's trying to kill me), "Was wollen Sie von mir" (what do you want?), and "Gehen Sie!" (Go Away!).
- Moscow, Russia is mentioned by Dimitri Rascalov (probably his birthplace/hometown) to Mikhail Faustin, and Russian Mafia members by listening to conversations.
- Brazil is mentioned on the mission Departure Time in The Ballad of Gay Tony. Before Luis faces Bulgarin, he suggests that Tony should move to Brazil if he doesn't come back. Arnaud, a random character, mentions a brazilian prostitute on his second encounter with Luis.
- Dublin, Ireland and some other Irish cities are mentioned at signs in the Lucky Winkles bar in GTA IV.
- Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia is mentioned on Chatterbox FM in GTA III when Lazlow says "Working here sure beats the hell out of digging sewage ditches outside Kuala Lumpur."
- Australia is mentioned a few times on the radio, and it is mentioned numerous times that they were at war with the United States some time in the past.
- Baghdad, Iraq is mentioned in GTA IV by the radio show Fizz! on the radio station WKTT. One of the hosts says "Liberty City's entertainment scene has been hotter than a Baghdad barbecue!"
- Belfast, Northern Ireland is mentioned in during the firefight with the LCPD in the GTA IV mission Three Leaf Clover. Derrick McReary may say something along the lines of "I haven't seen fighting like this since Belfast!"
- Vietnam and the Vietnam war is mentioned at several occasions.
- Cambodia is where some parts of the Evacuator takes place.
- Iran is where rock musician Crow is playing a much-anticipated show during the events of GTA IV. It is advertised on the radio and on TV.
- Djibouti, Fairbanks, Tuskegee, Panama City and Santiago are all mentioned in a radio commercial for the TV show The Science Of Crime.
- Mexico is mentioned frequently, particularly in GTA Vice City and GTA San Andreas.
- Sweden, Japan and Connecticut are all mentioned in an episode of Pressing Issues on VCPR in GTA Vice City Stories.
- Beirut is mentioned as Liberty City's twin city in the GTA III Era.
- Canada is mentioned by Roman Bellic in GTA IV and by pedestrians in the GTA IV era games. It is also mentioned by Trevor Philips in GTA V.
- Roman Bellic lists "scared Canadians" as one of the many types of females to hit on in Liberty City.
- In GTA IV, Many pedestrians exclaim "I'm going back to Canada!", "proud to be Canadian!" or "Canada's way safer than this!" when something threatening happens around them.
- In GTA IV, Weazel News said in a report that "Canadians created hockey as a excuse to beat each other, just as us Americans did with football".
- In GTA V, Trevor Philips tells a story to Wade Hebert of himself, but using a different name to confuse Wade, mentioning that he smuggled drugs from Canada.
- Colombia is a South American country which is the origin point for the Colombian Cartel. The illicit drug SPANK is manufactured here and sent to Liberty City via sea transportation.
- Switzerland is a country in Western Europe, and one of the mentioned possibilities of where Darko Brevic may be hiding during the events of Grand Theft Auto IV.
- Bucharest, Romania is the capital city of Romania, and is where Darko Brevic had been hiding during the events of Grand Theft Auto IV.
- Greece is a country in southeastern Europe, and is mentioned by some pedestrians. When shooting a gun in The Ballad of Gay Tony in Broker some pedestrians will mention this, for example, one screams; "I did not move from Greece to America to get shot!"
- Utah is a US State and is mentioned in The Ballad of Gay Tony.
- Bolivia is a South American country, infamously known for the production of cocaine. Derrick McReary mentions it in the mission Three Leaf Clover.
- Singapore is a country in South East Asia. In The Ballad Of Gay Tony, a Weazel News report mentions that a skyscraper is missing from Singapore.
- Easter Island is a polynesian island which is a special territory of Chile. In Grand Theft Auto IV, it is mentioned on the website easterislandcoverup.com.


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Yesterday one of Dr. Pissy's staff was out, so Mrs. Pissy came in to help. And, of course, she brought Fancy.
Fancy spent most of the time trapped in the break room, but during lunch was allowed to roam the office since there weren't any patients.
After she was cooped up again I brought my 1:00 back, and gave him directions. "Go on back, 2nd room on the right, have a seat and I'll be with you in a sec" (I wanted to get a Diet Coke).
So after I had a can, I headed back to my office. The patient was standing in the hallway.
"Uh, doc, do you know there's a pile of dog shit in your office?"


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FDA: New rules will make food safer
WASHINGTON » The Food and Drug Administration says its new guidelines would make the food Americans eat safer and help prevent the kinds of foodborne disease outbreaks that sicken or kill thousands of consumers each year.
The rules, the most sweeping food safety guidelines in decades, would require farmers to take new precautions against contamination, to include making sure workers' hands are washed, irrigation water is clean, and that animals stay out of fields. Food manufacturers will have to submit food safety plans to the government to show they are keeping their operations clean.
The long-overdue regulations could cost businesses close to half a billion dollars a year to implement, but are expected to reduce the estimated 3,000 deaths a year from foodborne illness. The new guidelines were announced Friday.
Just since last summer, outbreaks of listeria in cheese and salmonella in peanut butter, mangoes and cantaloupe have been linked to more than 400 illnesses and as many as seven deaths, according to the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The actual number of those sickened is likely much higher.
Many responsible food companies and farmers are already following the steps that the FDA would now require them to take. But officials say the requirements could have saved lives and prevented illnesses in several of the large-scale outbreaks that have hit the country in recent years.
In a 2011 outbreak of listeria in cantaloupe that claimed 33 lives, for example, FDA inspectors found pools of dirty water on the floor and old, dirty processing equipment at Jensen Farms in Colorado where the cantaloupes were grown. In a peanut butter outbreak this year linked to 42 salmonella illnesses, inspectors found samples of salmonella throughout Sunland Inc.'s peanut processing plant in New Mexico and multiple obvious safety problems, such as birds flying over uncovered trailers of peanuts and employees not washing their hands.
Under the new rules, companies would have to lay out plans for preventing those sorts of problems, monitor their own progress and explain to the FDA how they would correct them.
"The rules go very directly to preventing the types of outbreaks we have seen," said Michael Taylor, FDA's deputy commissioner for foods.
The FDA estimates the new rules could prevent almost 2 million illnesses annually, but it could be several years before the rules are actually preventing outbreaks. Taylor said it could take the agency another year to craft the rules after a four-month comment period, and farms would have at least two years to comply — meaning the farm rules are at least three years away from taking effect. Smaller farms would have even longer to comply.
The new rules, which come exactly two years to the day President Barack Obama's signed food safety legislation passed by Congress, were already delayed. The 2011 law required the agency to propose a first installment of the rules a year ago, but the Obama administration held them until after the election. Food safety advocates sued the administration to win their release.
The produce rule would mark the first time the FDA has had real authority to regulate food on farms. In an effort to stave off protests from farmers, the farm rules are tailored to apply only to certain fruits and vegetables that pose the greatest risk, like berries, melons, leafy greens and other foods that are usually eaten raw. A farm that produces green beans that will be canned and cooked, for example, would not be regulated.
Such flexibility, along with the growing realization that outbreaks are bad for business, has brought the produce industry and much of the rest of the food industry on board as Congress and FDA has worked to make food safer.
In a statement Friday, Pamela Bailey, president of the Grocery Manufacturers Association, which represents the country's biggest food companies, said the food safety law "can serve as a role model for what can be achieved when the private and public sectors work together to achieve a common goal."
The new rules could cost large farms $30,000 a year, according to the FDA. The agency did not break down the costs for individual processing plants, but said the rules could cost manufacturers up to $475 million annually.
FDA Commissioner Margaret Hamburg said the success of the rules will also depend on how much money Congress gives the chronically underfunded agency to put them in place. "Resources remain an ongoing concern," she said.
The farm and manufacturing rules are only one part of the food safety law. The bill also authorized more surprise inspections by the FDA and gave the agency additional powers to shut down food facilities. In addition, the law required stricter standards on imported foods. The agency said it will soon propose other overdue rules to ensure that importers verify overseas food is safe and to improve food safety audits overseas.
Food safety advocates frustrated over the last year as the rules stalled praised the proposed action.
"The new law should transform the FDA from an agency that tracks down outbreaks after the fact, to an agency focused on preventing food contamination in the first place," said Caroline Smith DeWaal of the Center for Science in the Public Interest.