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Friday, February 18, 2011
Luscious Lemon Sauce
From the kitchen of One Perfect Bite...I'm really fond of this sauce and always try to keep a jar of it in the refrigerator. I can't imagine having gingerbread without it and, because lemon is my chocolate, I generally put it on ice cream and bread pudding as well. It has the velvety texture and flavor of a good lemon curd, but it flows with the easy grace of a well-made chocolate sauce. This is really easy to make and I'm featuring it here because I think any serious collection of recipes should include a great lemon sauce. This is a great, if simple sauce. It keeps for up to a month in the refrigerator. That being said, it is still best served warm. You can warm the sauce in the microwave or in a pot of barely simmering water. Here's the recipe.
Luscious Lemon Sauce...from the kitchen of One Perfect Bite inspired by Gourmet magazine
1 large egg - very well beaten
1/4 cup cold water
juice of 1 lemon - approximately 3 tablespoons
finely grated peel of half a lemon
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup butter
In a small saucepan, whisk beaten egg, water, lemon juice and peel until well blended. Place pan on medium heat and whisk in sugar. Add butter and cook, stirring constantly, until butter is melted and sauce comes to a full boil. Remove from heat, cool slightly and serve warm. Yield: 1-1/2 cups.
You might also enjoy these recipe:
Chocolate Sauce - The Galley Gourmet
Killer Chocolate Sauce - Bon Appetit Hon
Chocolate and Salted Caramel Sauces - It's a Big Cookie, Dude
Dulce De Leche - Being Susie Homemaker
Hot Fudge Sauce - In Flora's Kitchen
Mocha Hot Fudge Sauce - Joy the Baker
Chocolate and Butterscotch Sauces - H.O.G. Food Blog
Ridiculously Easy Butterscotch Sauce - Smitten Kitchen
Vanilla Sauce - Southern Food
Caramel Sauce - Buttercream Barbie
48 comments :
- Unknown said...
Lemon is my chocolate, too. Wait. Caramel might be. Hmmm... I made your delicious lemon pudding today and just ate a second helping. (Burp.) Y.u.m.! Gotta try this lemon sauce, too. I luv your blog and have so many of your recipes. Thanks so much for sharing with us!
- February 17, 2011 at 9:49 PM
- Meg Johnston said...
Oh wow, this sounds amazing. I bet it's awesome drizzled on top of vanilla ice cream.
- February 17, 2011 at 9:57 PM
- Angela said...
Yum! This looks great! I can't wait to click on those links.
- February 17, 2011 at 10:10 PM
- Ginny Hartzler said...
This looks wonderful, I can't wait to try it. I just printed it out. How long will it keep in the fridge?
- February 17, 2011 at 10:16 PM
I bet this tastes great on pound cake. Thanks for the recipe!
- February 17, 2011 at 10:18 PM
- scrambledhenfruit said...
Lemon is always welcome at my house- I give it equal time with chocolate. :) This sauce sounds wonderful- I'm definitely saving this recipe.
- February 17, 2011 at 10:23 PM
- Candace said...
You make this sauce sound so easy. I have to try it. It looks ah-mazing. I absolutely love lemon! I think I love it equally as much as chocolate. Thank you for sharing your wonderful recipes.
- February 17, 2011 at 10:28 PM
- kitchen flavours said...
This is wonderful! I can just imagine having this sauce over creamy vanilla ice cream! Will be making this, thank you so much for sharing!
- February 17, 2011 at 10:37 PM
- Kerstin said...
Mmmm, what a versatile sauce - I would definitely start by putting on ice cream with some strawberries :)
- February 17, 2011 at 11:23 PM
- aipi said...
As I was looking at the picture..I could think of several different uses of this sauce..that is indeed luscious n oooo so lemony :)
US Masala - February 17, 2011 at 11:30 PM
- Southerncook said...
I love anything with lemon. YUM!!!! I am very glad to have this recipe as well. I need to prepare it soon and I love the fact that it can stay in the fridge for a month, the possibilities are endless.
Carolyn/A Southerners Notebook - February 17, 2011 at 11:35 PM
Mmmm...this lemon sauce on gingerbread!? Yes, please! :)
- February 17, 2011 at 11:37 PM
- Don't Make Me Call My Flying Monkeys! said...
Lemon is my favorite! I just can;t resist them at all, in any form! I am so happy right now!!
- February 17, 2011 at 11:37 PM
- Monet said...
Smile. I think lemon is my chocolate too! I've never thought of putting lemon sauce on my icecream though...what a great idea! Thank you for sharing with me tonight. I hope you have a great Friday. I'm so ready for the weekend!
- February 17, 2011 at 11:48 PM
- Vidya Chandrahas said...
I always love lemon flavour...awesome sauce...nice clicks too..It's amazing!
- February 17, 2011 at 11:56 PM
- Sanjeeta kk said...
Looks like lemon curd. Love the color and the jar! Thinking of making it without eggs, any substitute you can suggest...
- February 18, 2011 at 12:06 AM
- Linda Starr said...
Oh this sounds wonderful and it keeps in the frig that long, right up my alley. Lemon is my lemon, but chocolate is my chocolate. Ha.
- February 18, 2011 at 12:30 AM
- Peggy Clyde said...
What a wonderful recipe. I can think of many uses for it. Thanks.
- February 18, 2011 at 12:39 AM
- -Arielle- said...
Looks divine! I have never had gingerbread with lemon sauce so this is a must try!
- February 18, 2011 at 12:49 AM
- Alessandra said...
I think that here we call it lemon curd. It is lovely!
Have a great week end
Alessandra - February 18, 2011 at 2:40 AM
- Priya Suresh said...
Thats a delectable sauce..
- February 18, 2011 at 3:21 AM
- Ana Rita Marreiros said...
I'm curious to try this kind of sauce...I have a bunch of lemons, maybe today is the day!!
Thanks for sharing ,
Rita - February 18, 2011 at 4:05 AM
- Lucie said...
Yay, more lemon!! This sauce sounds like it would be divine on top of pound cake with a little whipped cream...another winner!
- February 18, 2011 at 4:09 AM
- Lynn said...
I can see this drizzled over blueberry muffins:@)
- February 18, 2011 at 4:57 AM
- Khadija El Mary said...
I love lemon too! Great recipe!
- February 18, 2011 at 5:32 AM
I really have missed quite a bit of your posts, my mum has fallen ill, so I do apologize. You know.. then life gets busy.. yadda ...I just finished up the new site... but bare with me while I'm still tweaking it..
On a lighter note.... the lemon sauce sounds absolutely terrific... I lurv it. - February 18, 2011 at 5:57 AM
- Raks said...
Never tasted anything with lemon sauce,but I love this a lot,looks superb!
- February 18, 2011 at 5:59 AM
- Nuts about food said...
That looks delicious and much quicker than lemon curd!
- February 18, 2011 at 6:00 AM
- Mimosa Café said...
what can i say. i just love your recipes.
- February 18, 2011 at 6:07 AM
- Manu said...
Yummmm! I would love to have some of this sauce on vanilla ice cream!!!! Your site is really good, tasty food and great pictures!!! I have so much to learn! Will stick around! :-)
- February 18, 2011 at 6:16 AM
- Tanna said...
Mmmmmmmm..... Blessings to you, Mary! Hope you have a wonderful weekend.
- February 18, 2011 at 6:45 AM
- Butter Hearts Sugar said...
Yum it would be dreamy drizzled over ice cream!
- February 18, 2011 at 7:35 AM
- Harika baratam said...
Lemon sauce looks perfect.
- February 18, 2011 at 7:53 AM
- Kim said...
I can imagine this sauce on a vanilla ice cream scoop! WOW! This looks so good and if it keeps for a month in the refrigerator, there is no excuse for me not to prepare it!
- February 18, 2011 at 7:58 AM
- From the Kitchen said...
My mother loved gingerbread with lemon sauce. Her sauce always had a few little lumps in it but we loved it too. Thanks for the memory and recipe.
Bonnie - February 18, 2011 at 8:04 AM
- Unknown said...
Oh yes, this self proclaimed sauce girl will be putting this on the list of things to make!! YUM!!!
- February 18, 2011 at 8:06 AM
- Carol @ There's Always Thyme to Cook said...
Looks delicious, I'd need just a spoon to eat it straight from the jar!
- February 18, 2011 at 8:22 AM
- Helia Roberto said...
I'm looking for this kind of recipe's for a while, cause I have a lot of lemos here, I'll try this one, that's for sure!!
Hélia - February 18, 2011 at 9:06 AM
- Unknown said...
Great sauce Mary! I do not have a lemon sauce in my collection but you have sold me on the fact that I should - looks like I found it!
- February 18, 2011 at 9:13 AM
This looks very good. I really like lemon curd so I bet this is great.
- February 18, 2011 at 10:20 AM
- Ryan said...
Lemon is my chocolate too! This looks divine!!! My mouth is watering!
- February 18, 2011 at 10:28 AM
- Joanne said...
I see myself using this as a spread for a nutella lemon sauce sandwich. This way I can have both my lemon and my chocolate in one bite! Amazing.
- February 18, 2011 at 12:34 PM
- That Girl said...
I love when I have a question, like, how does this compare to lemon curd, and you answer it right as I'm thinking it!
- February 18, 2011 at 1:00 PM
- Susi's Kochen und Backen said...
I don't think I have ever had lemon sauce like that and since I love a good lemon curd, this sound scrumptious! I will have to bookmark this recipe as well (along with all your other wonderful lemon recipes), it sounds like a winner! :o)
- February 18, 2011 at 2:27 PM
- My Little Space said...
Here comes another killer! my fingers will definitely digging into it as soon as it's ready.
Kristy - February 21, 2011 at 2:18 AM
- Wendi @ Bon Appetit Hon said...
Thanks for including Killer Chocolate Sauce in the links. It really is fabulous and easy. I must give this luscious lemon sauce a try.
- February 21, 2011 at 10:18 AM
- Beverly said...
Mary, I am so glad I scrolled down and found this recipe. I love lemon sauce, and this sounds perfect.
I even like it on toast.♥ - February 22, 2011 at 1:36 PM
- Wendi @ Bon Appetit Hon said...
I finally made this. And now I can't stop eating it. Easy AND delicious.
- May 2, 2011 at 3:58 PM


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At a trade fair in Hanover, Germany, on Monday, three women protesters got quite close to Russian President Vladimir Putin before stripping off their blouses and shouting expletives at the Russian leader.
Putin, who was joined at the fair by German Chancellor Angela Merkel, later sarcastically thanked the women for calling the news media's attention to the gathering.
"As to this action, I liked it," Putin said, according to a German translator. The Russian leader added that the protesters were "pretty girls" and said he couldn't hear what they were screaming.
Well, their words weren't polite. F-bombs were tossed Putin's way. It's believed the protesters belong to a women's rights group, "Femen," which objects to how members of the feminist punk band Pussy Riot were jailed in Russia for "hooliganism."
Putin told reporters he "couldn't see if they were blond or brunettes. ... I don't see anything horrifying in what they did." He also quipped that while it's better to keep one's clothes on during protests, "it's not so cold out — so they can also do it this way."
The president's seeming nonchalance doesn't extend to his aides, however. They want the women, who were grabbed and led away by security staff, to be punished. "This is ordinary hooliganism and unfortunately it happens all over the world, in any city. One needs to punish [them]," said Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov, according to Reuters.
Soraya Sarhaddi Nelson is an NPR international correspondent.
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Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Monkey See, Monkey Doo-Doo
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Case in point: here's what reader Alexis P. wanted for her son Caden's 1st birthday:
Which is sort of cute, but not really; the swirl cupcakes make it look like Mr. Monkey has see-through arms and legs. That isn't the Wreck, though...
This is:
I can't decide if this is a monkey at a stick-up who just soiled himself (an unfortunate effect of not outlining the "tail"), or if he's another steamroller victim. Or, given that expression, I suppose he could be on some Amazon torture rack - I mean, those arms and legs are rather long...
But wait! There's more!
Aren't you curious what the birthday boy thought of his cake? Because fortunately for us Alexis captured little Caden's reaction for posterity:
Ah, I can almost hear the little shrieks of terror from here. Kinda reminds me of my own family gatherings...
Think of it this way, Alexis: without experiences like this, what will Caden talk about later in therapy? Oh, and Caden, there's always our young Wreckporter's intern program for next year.
NOTE: I've been getting some complaints about the proliferation of CCCs here on Cake Wrecks - which is kind of like complaining about all the sick people in hospitals, if you think about it. Still, I'll do my best to space them out between "real" cakes for y'all. Remember, though: if we let these silent menaces go unmentioned, bakeries might start thinking they're acceptable! We can't have that, now can we?
102 comments | Post a Comment
- The Courteous Chihuahua said...
You know, I looked just like the second monkey one fateful night after dinner at our local Chinese buffet...
Also...his feet are on backwards. - November 11, 2008 at 9:27 AM
- Craig said...
Thanks to the awkward positioning of the tail, see-through arms and legs are not the only thing it makes it appear that Mr. Monkey has. I'm trying to remain kid friendly here, but the top cake is getting awfully close to balloon cake and firehose cake territory.
- November 11, 2008 at 9:29 AM
- ad said...
It's like an angry, angry gremlin...
- November 11, 2008 at 9:29 AM
- Cyndi said...
That's scary! Poor kid!
- November 11, 2008 at 9:30 AM
- Boozy Tooth said...
Oh. Dear. God.
I was about to chastise you ,Jen, for picking on the top monkey, when I realized that was supposed to be the template.
I think we all agree that the CCC concept is a travesty to cakedom, but why are they typically so pooly done? The second monkey is horrid. And that TAIL! Kind of puts all into perspective right there. Case closed.
Alixandra Hice
http://casahice.blosgspot.com - November 11, 2008 at 9:38 AM
- Scraplin said...
OMG that monkey wreck is really wrecked! although that "tail" could possibly be mistaken for something else....LOL
I can't stand CCC's and I refuse to take an order for one in our bakery, no matter how many people want one! They are a pain to make, and I'm sure they are a mess to serve. Keep the wrecks coming...CCC's or not.. I love this blog! - November 11, 2008 at 9:48 AM
- Kathy said...
I like seeing the CCC. Customers want these cakes. Most of our decorators hate making them.
- November 11, 2008 at 9:50 AM
No I think it's definitely a steamroller victim. That's one flat and dead looking monkey right there.
It also looks a bit like me by the time Friday rolls around and I haven't yet had my weekend beer. - November 11, 2008 at 9:52 AM
- Unknown said...
When I first saw the post, I thought you were going to comment on the unfortunate placement of the "tail" on Monkey Cake #1. I don't know what you've done to me because it seems I now see genitalia on ALL cakes. Really...I used to be a very nice lady.
- November 11, 2008 at 10:02 AM
- Dea said...
It's so ANGRY! Find a happy place!
- November 11, 2008 at 10:05 AM
- Unknown said...
a wreck's a wreck. REPORT IT ALL! who cares if it's CCC's. it's a wreck! that's all that matters :)
- November 11, 2008 at 10:10 AM
- UnitOfForce said...
WOW. That poor little boy.
I will say though, they are similar. They're both brown. Right? - November 11, 2008 at 10:13 AM
I'm laughing so hard!!! I thought the first one was the wreck... then I scrolled! Number one is the colon.. and number two is... well.... number 2!!!!
- November 11, 2008 at 10:20 AM
I think he looks like he's rather upset at having crapped himself not just the lack of tail outline; but because if you look at the orginal template cake, his tail is actual cupcakes, if you look at the super wreck it's really just blobs of brown icing...which leads very easily to the above mention effect.
Which means the decorator extra cheaped out. Bravo! - November 11, 2008 at 10:20 AM
It always amazes me that people have the audacity to complain about the content in YOUR blog! If they don't want to see the CCC, they can always go elsewhere or start their own blog where they can control the content. Sheesh already, people, it's HER blog!
- November 11, 2008 at 10:35 AM
I agree...cupcake cakes are wrecky, but more tragic wrecky than funny wrecky. I need my daily dose of misspellings, misunderstandings and unintentional inuendos!
- November 11, 2008 at 10:40 AM
- Janice in GA said...
That face... I'd scream and cry too! Jeezopete.
- November 11, 2008 at 10:46 AM
- Women on the Verge said...
Don't be offended, I am a grammar stickler. It should say "effect" not "affect" in your post.
Love your site. - November 11, 2008 at 10:51 AM
- Bri said...
I smiled when I saw the first one. I saw the little tuft of chest hair and the toes and thought "how cute!".
I scrolled down and...*blink blink*. I actually gasped.
O my.
It also looks, aside from looking like "an angry, angry gremlin", like a squashed, four legged spider.
Gag inducing yet so, so funny!
I want a cake wreck to happen to me! Except not on my wedding day!
--Brianna @ Passion.Fruit - November 11, 2008 at 10:52 AM
- Jen said...
My evil plan to turn you all into gutter-minded deviants is working! Mwu-ha-ha-haaaa!! - November 11, 2008 at 10:52 AM
I'm not sure why the flat monkey has human-like hands and cat-like feet...
And I enjoy all your wrecks! It's your blog - post what YOU want. - November 11, 2008 at 10:53 AM
- *James* said...
i pulled up your page and was starting to wonder what was so wrong with the first monkey...and then i scrolled down. All I can say is: Poor Caden :(
word verification: cylighea
The poor monkey was born with a bad case of cylighea. - November 11, 2008 at 10:55 AM
- Mari said...
Thank goodness I ate breakfast already!
- November 11, 2008 at 10:55 AM
think the first one is bad as well. that 'tail' looks like his privates. both are unfortunate. the second one looks like a wookie.
- November 11, 2008 at 11:04 AM
I'm new here and I have no clue what a CCC cake. Anyone care to enlighten me? Thanks!!
Oh and the monkey is really creeping me out..... - November 11, 2008 at 11:11 AM
- HorribleLicensePlates said...
Ew! That monkey has chest hair. Also, that "tail" could be confused for all sorts of things.
- November 11, 2008 at 11:12 AM
- Das Mutter said...
Holy monkeys! To me they kind of look like they are pinned down on a science table, and that is what freaks me out about them!
- November 11, 2008 at 11:16 AM
- Helen Highwater said...
He's young, he'll get over it. So many more horrific cake wrecks to come in all our lives! Yippee!
- November 11, 2008 at 11:16 AM
- Bodell Family said...
Who keeps complaining about the ccc's? If you don't like reading about them, then don't read this blog. Personally, I LOVE reading about all the cake wrecks no matter which kind. I don't think I've laughed as hard as I have reading about them, my husband too! Please, keep up the GREAT wrecks!
- November 11, 2008 at 11:19 AM
- Alisa @ A stitch in between said...
I love seeing CCC wrecks, keep 'em coming.. And I would agree, these monkeys look a bit too anatomically correct for my taste..
- November 11, 2008 at 11:21 AM
The good news is that Caden won't remember this cake. Except perhaps in his deepest, darkest nightmares.
- November 11, 2008 at 11:29 AM
- Angie McCullagh said...
That second monkey looks like something I'd pull off.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com) - November 11, 2008 at 11:30 AM
- Mr. Becksfort said...
Wait, she ordered a CCC? what did she expect would happen? the line between happy and nightmarishly scary is apparently pretty slim when it comes to monkeys.
- November 11, 2008 at 11:31 AM
- Sara Lou said...
Wow - i can't believe some people would complain about the content on YOUR blog...
Let them make their own blog if they want it done their way. Exactly - they won't...
It is like complaining about how your husband does dishes... or the laundry... if you don't like it - do it yourself.
Thank you for ALL of your wrecks. I enjoy each & everyone of them - they brighten my day (& cause me to stare into the bakery cases at the grocery stores). - November 11, 2008 at 11:41 AM
- Missy said...
Oh poor Caden! I feel bad for him just by looking at his picture. Alexis, I hope you took that picture to the bakery and showed them his reaction, so they'd feel bad!
- November 11, 2008 at 11:42 AM
- The Caked Crusader said...
You must continue with exposing the CCCs. I can't word it any better than Edmund Burke (although he possibly wasn't talking about CCCs):
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing" - November 11, 2008 at 11:43 AM
Keep posting them all!!! I love this site. A wreck is a wreck and ALL should be shown to the world.
Your site brings me loads of laughs every day. Keep up the great work! - November 11, 2008 at 11:49 AM
Yeah, Jen. You succeeded. My first thought at the first cake was the fire hose. Ironic considering most people see me as so innocent. If they only knew what you've done to me. :-P LOL!
Poor kid! What a crappy first birthday cake! - November 11, 2008 at 11:50 AM
At least these cupcakes appear to be individually iced.
- November 11, 2008 at 11:55 AM
- Meg said...
I have to admit that when I scrolled down to see the second monkey it actually scared me... I though what the HE** is that thing.. I crossed my eyes then squinted and I saw it... I saw the monkey it should have been... No wonder that poor little guy is crying... If my Mom made that cake for the whole world to see I would be crying too... I wonder how it tasted...was it good or did it taste like the crap coming out from it's bum!!
BTW... I personally like some CCC's. They are great for a crowd of teenagers at a ball game... take one and run... no plates, not fork... just napkins for serving!! Took me a few minutes to figure out what the CCC stood for... I HATE ACRONYMNS!! - November 11, 2008 at 11:58 AM
- Donna M. said...
Oh dear...I woke up this morning with a sore throat and a cold, thought to check what was new on Cake Wrecks to cheer me up...and it only got worse.
Why oh Why do decorators say "Sure, I can duplicate that", when they can't?
I think I'm still recuperating from Sandra Lee's mess yesterday. - November 11, 2008 at 12:03 PM
- Unknown said...
Monkey Autopsy! Arms/legs spread eagle, and apparently a mess made on the table there, too. All we need is the Y incision.
No wonder the poor kid's screaming. I'd scream too if someone served me a dead monkey cake.
The top cake, while better made, looks VERY happy to see everyone.:o)
~Amy B. - November 11, 2008 at 12:04 PM
- Donna M. said...
I just noticed something that may have contributed to the wreck...I counted 36 cupcakes on the first one, but only 24 on the wreck?
- November 11, 2008 at 12:06 PM
- Unknown said...
hahhaha...sick people in hospitals!??! hilarious!
Please don't let any reader dissuade you posting reality in a timely matter (ie. don't space out the CCC reality)...if the people make CCC then let's see the CCC wrecks.
No need to withhold the goodness from the rest of us, simply because some readers complained about the direction the world is going.
Seriously, I love everything you post because of your commentary. Your commentary takes it from 'oh, that's weird.' to AHAHAHAHAHAHA, that's incredibly freakin' hilarious!
thanx...I love clicking on your posts in my google reader.
PS-ex. 'I can't decide if this is a monkey at a stick-up who just soiled himself (an unfortunate affect of not outlining the "tail"), or if he's another steamroller victim. Or, given that expression, I suppose he could be on some Amazon torture rack - I mean, those arms and legs are rather long...'
SO worth my time! - November 11, 2008 at 12:07 PM
- Chic Runner said...
People who are complaning need to just stop reading your blog! :) Those monkey CCC are just bad in general, and CCC are bad, get the word out!
- November 11, 2008 at 12:22 PM
- Becky said...
Wow. That second one really scares me.
And I have a question - isn't this YOUR blog? Can't you write about those darn CCC things as much as you want on YOUR blog? I can't stand for people to complain about something they have no right to complain about. Geez.
Ok, I'm better. - November 11, 2008 at 12:35 PM
- tony a.k.a. isweatbutter said...
in my opinion, BOTH of those monkeys look like they are... well... "pinching a loaf."
- November 11, 2008 at 12:37 PM
- Laura ~Peach~ said...
OH MYYYYYYYYYYY Poor caden ... Monkey DOO DOO LMAO have mercy ... KEEP THE CCC's comeing maybe people will learn!
- November 11, 2008 at 12:41 PM
I do believe that YIKES is all I can manage on this one...I'm not a huge fan of the first one, but I'd surely be content with it if the 2nd CCC was my only other option...how horrid!
- November 11, 2008 at 12:54 PM
- Catherine said...
Becky- a CCC is a CupCake Cake. Took me a few to realize that one.
Also, just what was the decorator thinking?! - November 11, 2008 at 12:57 PM
That first cake was hideous in the first place - she deserved what she got for ordering what was already a wreck! Of course - the second one is beyond words...
- November 11, 2008 at 1:11 PM
- Debbi said...
But, Jen, CCC's are just so *wrong* ...
- November 11, 2008 at 1:57 PM
- Melody said...
New reader here -- I love this blog! I read the whole thing yesterday.
As someone who just made her first casserole at age 29 and who cannot bake at all, I understand the necessity of the CCC. However, how freaking difficult would it be to cut some of the cupcakes so the entire CCC has a better shape? Surely someone wouldn't mind (or would prefer, even) half a cup cake?
It just seems like if you're going to go through the trouble of frosting 30 cupcakes, you'd want the end result to be semi-satisfactory.
Anyway, great blog, thanks. I love the Super Mario cakes!! - November 11, 2008 at 2:18 PM
Caden? I'm surprised the bakery didn't write "Jaden" or "Aiden" or "Braeden" or some other variation of that name.
- November 11, 2008 at 2:20 PM
- Honi said...
Ya know I gotta quit reading you at work.. all this silent laughter is going to make my eyeballs pop out...
- November 11, 2008 at 2:20 PM
- CaliGirl9 said...
The second CCC looks like a veterinary school specimen in a primate anatomy class.
Or a drug company clinical trials victim.
Either way don't let PETA see those CCCs! - November 11, 2008 at 2:31 PM
- robyn said...
Keep talkin' about the CCC's--they are truly butt-ugly "cakes"!
- November 11, 2008 at 2:35 PM
- Alexis AKA MOM said...
Thanks Jen for showing my CCC wreck. Poor Caden has recovered but now has pictures in his 1st year scrapbook that will help with those therapy sessions. Many more items to come, maybe the pink bunny costume for Easter might have been a bad idea … HMMM
What I thought would be a cute easy cake turned into something very scary. The fun part was when you took the cupcakes off it looked like a legless monkey that pooped. Thankfully it was very tasty and the older kids thought it was hilarious.
Note for next year Wal-Mart not the best decorating place, but hey it's a kids birthday and the cake usually goes so fast they don't even look at it.
Thanks Anonymous for thinking I deserved it :). - November 11, 2008 at 2:57 PM
I just don't get CCCs...I mean, really people, is it actually that difficult to cut a cake???
- November 11, 2008 at 3:02 PM
- Deborah Godin said...
Since I discovered your blog, just a mere couple of weeks ago, I have been working on a new theory. Now I think I have it. Frosting should be a controlled substance. It's obvious that careless handling and consumption of it warps the brains of otherwise normal (or so we hope) people, and destroys their ability to determine what is cute and what is horrendous. Just say No to fondant!
- November 11, 2008 at 3:04 PM
- Susanna said...
I feel it is completely necessary that I comment in defense of the decorator- there is a huge complication with cupcake cakes that people overlook. When a customer orders a CCC, they are already taking risks, but most people who order CCCs are uncompromising tyrants! they want a specific number of cupcakes on the cake, no more, no less! heaven forbid they have to pay for an extra three cupcakes so that the monkey they just "have to have" can have a proper tail, or that a few extra cupcakes be made separate from the cake so the monkey's head isn't disproportionately huge... I think the fault behind most if not all CCC wrecks is that of the person ordering, not the person creating.
- November 11, 2008 at 3:42 PM
Please please don't stop posting the CCC!!! They are some of the FUNNIEST things we have ever seen! I LOVE SEEING ALLLLLL the cake wrecks!
- November 11, 2008 at 3:59 PM
Ya know.... I'm really starting to wonder about the general mental health of the "decorators" who churn out these awful creations.
How mentally unstable does one have to be to not realize that most of these cake concepts are FAR beyond her abilities? - November 11, 2008 at 4:11 PM
Just for the record, I believe the hands, feet, face, and yes, the chest and little poof of hair are plastic lay-ons. The rest is frosting on CC's. So see what happens when you don't have the **alls to tell a customer that you can't offer then the exact cake that they have found somewhere on the internet. Sometimes, some of the wrecks, are because a customer can't take NO for an answer. Now...as for CCC, I hate to make them but once again some customers will not take NO for an answer.
- November 11, 2008 at 4:17 PM
EFFECT, Jen, not affect. (Pet peeve.) Affect is an emotion, like affection. Effect is a result; as in something effective getting good results.
As for the monkey CCC: WHY?!
It's just not that hard to do a monkey as a single cake. Turns out way cuter too. I say this from personal experience! - November 11, 2008 at 4:22 PM
No wonder the poor child is crying, I might too! If you're going to make a CCC at least make it a decent one.
http://www.cakesandkids.com - November 11, 2008 at 4:24 PM
- Adele said...
HAHAHAHAHAHA that poor monkey looks like it escaped from the Monkey asylum. Poor, Poor Caden,this could warp him for life. I don't think a visit to the zoo anytime soon would be in order.
Adele - November 11, 2008 at 4:35 PM
- Chris said...
Poor kid ... scarred for life ...
- November 11, 2008 at 4:37 PM
- Unknown said...
First of all I wouldn't pay for such a thing. Being a mommy of two little girls and a lover a cakes myself I don't feel the CCC is a bad concept but just poorly done usually. I have seen several that you wouldn't know were CCC's. I think a pull apart cake is a great idea during birthday's with children under five. I agree however with this sites fodant strike. It is crap..but I have come across a recipe for candy clay that is a great substitution and easier to work with than fondant as well it compliments buttercream instead just using buttercream as glue.
I think the biggest travesty in the cake industry are the prefab gingerbread houses that taste and look like crap. I can at least stomach something if it tastes good but if it neither looks appetizing or tastes like it should...please take it off the market! - November 11, 2008 at 4:49 PM
- Jon said...
It looks like a an awful insect of some kind...
- November 11, 2008 at 4:55 PM
- Kimberly said...
I'm with Caden.. this terrified me and I'm 44.. he'll be scarred for life.. totally therapy bound!
- November 11, 2008 at 5:02 PM
Mistress of Cakes -- Could you provide a link to the candy clay recipe you like?
- November 11, 2008 at 5:35 PM
- *~*Lis*~* said...
Ugh - these are nasty!
I just yesterday ordered cakes for my twins 1st birthday - and spelled every word and made sure the order-taker didn't write anything like "underneath" on it, I didn't want any confusion! - November 11, 2008 at 5:45 PM
At least the tail (poop, stick, flotsam) isn't made of cupcakes, so some unfortunate guest doesn't have to eat from "there"...
CCC are just sad. But so wrecktasticly fun to witness! - November 11, 2008 at 6:41 PM
- FreedomFirst said...
I, for one, totally agree with you. CCCs are the new digital photography; everyone thinks they too can be a professional. They are a disgrace to the real bakers out there.
- November 11, 2008 at 7:00 PM
- writtenwyrdd said...
I thought the original was kinda cute, actually, but the wannabe was just awful. Pooping himself indeed.
- November 11, 2008 at 7:07 PM
I just can't understand why regular cupcakes aren't enough for people who want hassle free cake goodness? Why smush them together and decorate as one? I think we can all appreciate the simplicity of the CC (cupcake). But it's the third C that will get you everytime...
- November 11, 2008 at 8:24 PM
I second every word of greeneggsandsam's post. Jen, your blog totally rocks as is. Your commentary (and posters' comments) make entries **HILARIOUS!!!**
Not just LOL, or LMAO, or LOFL-blahblahblah, but tears-inducing, hilarious.
Keep fighting the good fight against CCCs, Jen!
And about today's CCC...did anyone else see a tortured monkey salad? Correction, tortured monkey, who soiled himself, salad?
Poooooor Caden! But thanks for contributing - your mom has started you on the right track early. - November 11, 2008 at 9:05 PM
- Hyena Overlord said...
I hate monkeys...all of them...cake or otherwise. I don't know why because I never got a ccc monkey cake for my birthday ever.
I think the second monkey is angry because he's crapped himself and doesn't have hands to throw the crap with.
But I do hate monkeys. - November 11, 2008 at 9:42 PM
- Wendy said...
I love seeing the cake wrecks.
I love seeing the ccc wrecks.
I love seeing the Sunday eye candy.
I love you.
Word Verification: gootain.
Must try to somehow include gootain in conversation tomorrow.... - November 11, 2008 at 11:14 PM
- Kookaburra said...
Dude! They didn't even put cupcakes in the tail! Just the frosting directly onto the cake board - how cheap!
- November 11, 2008 at 11:42 PM
Oh the nightmares!
And who cares if it's cupcakes?!
A wreck's a wreck!
Bring 'em on! - November 11, 2008 at 11:54 PM
- heartafire said...
I'm with all the commenters who say: LET HER BLOG IN PEACE, ON HER OWN BLOG !!
You do such a terrific job, with all of your screamingly funny commentary....don't change one thing!
And keep the CCC coming---they're a hootfest.
P.S. And you may have noticed I didn't say anything about the affect/effect issue.....
You see, I wasn't really affected by it. Its only effect, obviously, was to rile up others, who may have quirky affectations about such things as proper word usage. Yeesh.
Luckily, I have nothing but affection for you, and wouldn't dream of affecting your psyche with the effects of a pointless tirade about effectual use of language.
Oh well.....my affect is unchanged. I am still going to blithely go about my blog reading, singing a merry tune. - November 12, 2008 at 12:14 AM
- heartafire said...
"Monkey See, Monkey Doo-doo" has to be one of your funniest titles yet!
- November 12, 2008 at 12:15 AM
I love this blog. It just makes my day.....and I don't care what kind of "cake" it is. They are ALL funny!
Jane from Australia - November 12, 2008 at 5:00 AM
I have to weigh in on the side of those who want you to cut down on the number of CCCs in the blog. Not because I like them or anything, but because there's no challenge. CCCs are automatically bad, so it's not as horrid when they're wrecked. Real cakes are much more fun to see destroyed.
- November 12, 2008 at 7:19 AM
I'm sorry but you post whatever-the-h#ll you want to on YOUR blog. No one HAS to read it. Tell the whiners to get a life.
- November 12, 2008 at 7:44 AM
- Misha said...
I can't wrap my mind around CCC supporters. I just can't.
- November 12, 2008 at 8:02 AM
- Unknown said...
Oh look at the cute little fuzzy monkey buttcheeks. ROFL!!!
Love your blog!!! Don't change a thing. - November 12, 2008 at 8:12 AM
- pitchersbakery said...
ccc stand for CupCake Cakes...
the moneys tail looks like poop...
i have seen some awesome cupcake cakes... but this really is sad, if i made that i would have turned around and tried again and done a better job how can you even sell such a ccc? sad... - November 12, 2008 at 9:47 AM
People are complaining about too many Cupcake-cake wrecks?
You actually get complaints about what you choose to post in your OWN blog??????? Wow. And then you try to be accomodating (kudos on that). You're much nicer than I. - November 12, 2008 at 11:39 AM
- Jaime said...
I can not stop laughing.
That is the most messed up monkey face ever.
Wow. - November 12, 2008 at 3:33 PM
I love how there's no clear delineation between the arms and legs coming out of the torso -- it's just one big amorphous monkey blob.
- November 12, 2008 at 5:01 PM
- Women on the Verge said...
Thanks for fixing the grammar, Jen. I feel much better.
I have no problem with cupcakes alone - they serve the purpose. They are handy when taking somewhere for kids because no utensils are needed. It's the idea that someone, somewhere decided that it made sense to clump a bunch of little individual paper wrapped cakes together to make a monstrosity that puzzles me. If you want cupcakes, have cupcakes. Want cake? Get cake? This is apparently for those spoiled brats who want their cake and their cupcakes too? - November 12, 2008 at 5:03 PM
- Etiquette Bitch said...
i thought the "original" was barf-a-licious as well. I'm with you, Jen, a ban on all CCCs! (in the baking world, not on this site) although, i suppose if CCCs cease to exist, that might thin your submission pile a bit, eh?
- November 12, 2008 at 8:10 PM
- Rookie Bebe said...
The "better" top monkey's tail almost looks like an umbilical cord. Maybe if they'd made room to put the tail to the side it would look better.
- November 12, 2008 at 8:24 PM
Best. Headline. Ever.
- November 13, 2008 at 1:59 PM
- Susanna said...
Question: if the decorator had to draw the tail in icing on the board without cupcakes anyway, why did he bother to make it look like the tops of cupcakes? did he think he would "fool" somebody? why not just draw a tail?
- November 13, 2008 at 4:09 PM
Jeez, I showed this to my daughter who found it hysterical beyond words and now wants this cake for her 6th birthday. It's the poop that did it. Now where am I ever going to find one to re-create this monkey monstrosity with poo for her?
- November 14, 2008 at 9:38 AM
- Aviatrix said...
The disparity between what was evidently a catalogue picture and the delivered product suddenly made me wonder about an area in which I order custom work based on catalogue pictures: floral bouquets.
Recipients of flower arrangements I have ordered off te internet always TELL me they are beautiful, but now I'm frightened to wonder how many measured up as poorly as that poor, poor monkey. - November 15, 2008 at 3:10 PM
Hey everyone!! I just wanted to comment on this on two different points. I AM the decorator that made the first cupcake cake in the post.. I know the tail looks like a... well *cough*.. and the icing isn't flat. Believe it or not, the lady who ordered it told me she didn't like the smoothed-out iced ones. Also, she had to draw me out a picture on how she wanted it positioned. Go figure people order some atrocious things. I just tried to make it look decent for what I had to work with. And yes, there's 36 cupcakes vs. the normal 24. And yes, I almost gagged on the "replica"...
- December 11, 2008 at 12:28 AM
I think I'll stick with vanilla...
- December 6, 2009 at 3:12 PM
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The Senses and Your 1- to 2-Year-Old
Babies this age are maturing rapidly, and so is their understanding of the surrounding world. As they grow, they'll be seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching things that are all new.
Between 1 and 2 years old, your baby's sight will continue to improve. By age 2, these young toddlers will notice lots of details and depth perception is well-developed.
Your role is to provide pleasant, stimulating visual information. Picture books, colorful toys, and kids their own age are great things for babies to look at and learn about.
Take your little one on frequent outings. The park, the grocery store, and a friend's house can all provide interesting and novel sights.
No matter when toddlers say their first words, they'll already understand much of what is said to them before that. Your child should be able to respond to simple commands ("Roll the ball to Mommy") and be fully aware of the names of familiar objects and family members.
By about 18 months, your child will be able to point to some body parts, even if he or she can't yet tell you their different names. This shows that your baby's hearing is functioning well and language skills are developing.
Although toddlers will be saying more and more over the course of this year, many still indicate their wants and ideas in nonverbal ways. They enjoy the other pleasures of hearing: listening to children's songs and music, laughing and yelling with friends in the park, or having you read a bedtime story.
Taste and Smell
With their newfound language skills toddlers will tell parents which tastes they prefer and which they dislike. If kids don't like a food, they won't eat it.
But don't be discouraged if your toddler doesn't like a food the first time you offer it. Research shows that it can take several attempts before a child will accept a new food. Just keep providing opportunities to try a variety of foods, and one day your child will surprise you!
Help your child label tastes and smells by using descriptive words during meals or trips to restaurants.
Although toddlers may seem too busy to enjoy a cuddle or kiss, such affection is still a necessary part of their lives. Your child is experiencing and understanding so much more, but still needs to feel loved and secure. Take every opportunity to show this.
Don't forget that little fingers this age will be into everything. Hopefully you've already childproofed your home well, but take another look around from a toddler perspective and put unsafe items out of reach. Then you can encourage your child to touch and learn as much as possible.
Toddlers also start to use their hands to show frustration or look for attention, so don't be surprised if your little one starts hitting. Although very common, teach your child that hands are not for hitting. Initially, finding a distraction may be all that is needed; however, using "time-outs" may be necessary if the hitting persists.
Should I Be Concerned?
By now you have probably addressed any concerns you've had about your baby's eyesight, but be sure to contact your doctor if you notice any problems, including:
- eyes that wander in or out or don't move together
- inability to see or recognize distant objects or people
- persistent tearing, fluid discharge, crusting, or redness of the eyes
- frequent squinting or sensitivity to light
- droopy eyelids
- excessive eye rubbing or scratching
Hearing problems may become more apparent as speech emerges. Some kids speak earlier or later than others, but there should be signs that they can understand simple instructions even if they are not yet using many words.
Don't hesitate to report any concerns to your doctor, especially if you feel your child is not babbling or responding to your speech patterns. Chronic ear infections can sometimes leave kids with excessive fluid buildup that can interfere with healthy hearing. Special tests can check for hearing loss at any age.
It's common for parents to feel concerned or frustrated with their toddler's behavior, as kids love to touch and explore everything. They're naturally very busy and curious little people, so it's important to make sure that yours has a safe environment to explore. If you're not sure about how to guide your toddler's behavior, talk to your doctor.
Reviewed by: Mary L. Gavin, MD
Date reviewed: September 2011
Note: All information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice, diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.
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The Lord Strengthens Judah and Rescues Ephraim
1Ask the LORD for rain in the spring season,a
the LORD who brings storm clouds, and heavy rains,b
who gives to everyone grain in the fields.
2For the teraphim* have spoken nonsense,c
the diviners have seen false visions;
Deceitful dreams they have told,
empty comfort they have offered.
This is why they wandered like sheep,
wretched, for they have no shepherd.d
3My wrath is kindled against the shepherds,*
and I will punish the leaders.
For the LORD of hosts attends to the flock, the house of Judah,
and will make them like a splendid horse in battle.
4From them will come the tower,
from them the tent peg,
from them the bow of war,
from them every officer.
5Together they will be like warriors,
trampling the mud of the streets in battle.
They will wage war because the LORD is with them,
and will put the horsemen to shame.
6I will strengthen the house of Judah,e
the house of Joseph* I will save;
I will bring them back, because I have mercy on them;
they will be as if I had never cast them off,
for I am the LORD their God, and I will answer them.f
7Then Ephraim will be like a hero,
and their hearts will be cheered as by wine.g
Their children will see and rejoice—
their hearts will exult in the LORD.
8I will whistle for them and gather them in;
for I will redeem them
and they will be as numerous as before.*
9I sowed them among the nations,
yet in distant lands they will remember me;
they will bear their children and return.h
10I will bring them back from the land of Egypt,
and gather them from Assyria.
To the land of Gilead and to Lebanon I will bring them,
until no room is found for them.
11I will cross over to Egypt
and smite the waves of the sea,
and all the depths of the Nile will dry up.
The pride of Assyria will be cast down,
and the scepter of Egypt disappear.
12I will strengthen them in the LORD,i
in whose name they will walk—oracle of the LORD.
* [10:2] Teraphim: household idols or cult objects (see Gn 31:19, 30–35; Jgs 17:5; 1 Sm 19:11–17), or ancestor statuettes (see 2 Kgs 23:24; Hos 3:4).
* [10:3] Against the shepherds: bad leaders or false prophets.
* [10:6] The house of Joseph: represents the Northern Kingdom (Israel), as does Ephraim in v. 7 below.
* [10:8] Gather them in…be as numerous as before: God's intention is to bring back the exiles and redeem them as at the time of the exodus. This image, resumed in vv. 10–11, anticipates an expanded population, echoes the ancestral promise (Gn 1:22, 28; 9:1, 7; 35:11), and also suggests an awareness of the acute demographic decline of Jews in Palestine in the Persian period.
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Amphibiosans | |
Homeworld | Amphibios 9 |
First appearance | "Love's Labours Lost in Space" (1ACV04) |
The Amphibiosans are humanoid creatures that are smaller and lankier than the average human. They resemble amphibians on Earth, with whom they share some basic traits, but they are more physiologically similar to echinoderms such as sea cucumbers. They have no hair (except Kif had stubble) and possess only three fingers on each hand and two toes on each foot. Their skin color is a light green, and their slanted eyes are greenish-yellow with slit-like pupils. The Amphibiosans have no noses to speak of, but possess two nostrils, and the ears are set quite low on the head and stick out a bit. Their mouths are like lipless beaks. Their blood is green, and they have no bones; their endoskeleton consists of a system of hydrostatic liquid-filled bladders. Their bodies also have an extended respiratory system consisting of several air-filled cavities throughout their bodies. These structures could be inflated at will. The only known difference between males and females is that the females have eyelashes and the males don't. Both genders are capable of giving birth. Their social structure is clan-based, and their homeworld is an important member of the Democratic Order of Planets.
Life cycle
Amphibiosans have three distinctive phases in their life cycle that they go through, the tadpole, the "bulboid" and the swarm of hookworms. Amphibiosans bear their young inside their bellies like mammals until they are ready for birth. The post-birth life of an Amphibiosan begins in the swamp of their clan's birthing grounds. (In a deleted scene of "Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch", we learn that Earth's salmon stole the practice of returning to a particular birthing ground from Amphibiosans). The parent gives birth on the shore to several dozen or hundreds of tadpole-like offspring which make their way towards the water, a dangerous phase in which their lives are threatened by predators. The role of the smizmar in this part of the process is to protect them on their short journey. The next twenty years are spent in the water, until they mature into children, sprout legs and crawl ashore. According to the Grand Midwife, this phase is called a "bulboid". From there, the life cycle seems to be similar to that of humans until it nears its end; at old age, Amphibiosans morph into a swarm of flying hookworms, though they appear to retain a single conscious mind. When an Amphibiosan dies, it continues to feel pain for up to 6 hours after death, as according to the Old Farmer's Wikipedia.
Amphibiosan reproduction differs from that of Humans in a number of respects. Most notably is the fundamentally different reproductive strategy. Where humans employ a K-selection strategy, having a small number of offspring they care for and protect closely, Amphibiosans employ R-selection, having a huge number of offspring which are left to fend for themselves, like the Omicronians, Decapodians or terrestrial amphibians. In addition, while Amphibiosans reproduce sexually, combining the genes of two parents to produce offspring, this process is considerably more flexible than in humans. An Amphibiosan needs only come into contact with genetic material from an individual to become impregnated, and this individual does not even have to be a member of the same species. Reproduction also requires a smizmar, who may or may not be the biological parent of the children, but is regardless viewed as the true second parent by Amphibiosan custom.
Much is still unknown about Amphibiosan reproduction; for example, it is known that males can become impregnated, but given that they do not require sexual intercourse or even genetic compatibility to reproduce, the purpose of the male/female dichotomy is unclear. It is possible they are an evolutionary throwback to an earlier stage of their development, before they evolved their modern system of reproduction; if so, the difference may be superficial. It is even conceivable that they do not have separate sexes at all, but that each Amphibiosan chooses a gender that suits their personality in order to assimilate with other species like Humans more easily. However, it has been implied in the episode "That Darn Katz!" that Amphibiosans are also able to reproduce like humans when Kif and Amy have intercourse after getting really drunk. When Amy awakes the next morning, she sees a green puddle on the floor. She asks Kif if he has "yacked" on the floor, and the puddle(which turns out to be Kif) answers in the affirmative.
Racial abilities
Amphibiosan's bodies can be stretched very far, and they can bloat parts of themselves by pumping air inside them. Their endoskeleton is a system of fluid-filled bladders, which adds to their bodies' elasticity. They possess a camouflage reflex that may be triggered involuntarily by shock or surprise, blending the Amphibiosan into the background - they become seemingly transparent, except for their eyes. They can also bloat their heads to scare away predators. Amphibiosan are also capable of attaching themselves to walls and ceilings with their hands and feet, like a gecko. If necessary, they are able to shed their skins, although for some unknown reason they seem to wear underwear under their skin...
Besides the previously mentioned offspring of Kif, it is suspected that other Amphibiosan hybrids may exist. While his species shares some common traits with them, Hobsy, butler of socialite Mrs. Astor (6ACV12), has rounder eyes and pupils, more defined ears, a moustache like structure, and, most notably, a nose, never seen on Amphibiosans.
Additional Info
- The term "Amphibiosan" is derived from the name of the planet and, while an accurate description of the planet's life forms, may not be the species' correct name. "Moistoid" has recently been used by Comedy Central, but it is unclear if this is canon.
- The term, in use since 2007, first appears in "The Board Game Games" (2013). While the comics are not typically considered canon, this issue was written by episode writer Eric Rogers.
- Amphibiosans are considered married when the female stops sleeping with the male's superior officer.
- They walk on walls, change colors and inflate their heads to scare predators.
- Amphibiosans share many traits with the Decapodians:
- They are both amphibious
- Neither have bones
- They both have massive amounts of young that are left to fend for themselves
- They both go through different physical stages in their life-cycle.


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What's not to love here people? I mean we have butter, we have sugar, we have espresso, we have dark chocolate, and we have a sugary milk glaze. Breakfast and coffee in a bar--I'm all set. Let's just open a cafe that sells these and those chocolate dipped levain bakery cookies (and some coffee too, I guess), fabulous right?
I can't claim fame to these little gems, but I can say they were tasty with a HUGE side of addictive. You will eat way more than one bar. I would like to experiment again with these with new flavors be it cinnamon, ginger and hazelnut--hazelnut has to be worked in here somehow along with a creamy cream cheese glaze.
The only thing, if I were to make this again, I would use shaved chocolate instead of chips or pulse the chips in the processor to make them teeny tiny. The flavor of chocolate goes very well with the Starbucks Via, but it needs to be in small-meldable (if that's a word) flavors. Please note my changes.
Come join my vanilla sugar fan club
espresso bars
adapted from With Love & Butter
print recipe
To get really flat bars, I find it works best to smooth them over with an offset spatula, using gentle pressure, just after they come out of the oven and before you apply the glaze.
1 cup (2 sticks) butter, at room temperature
1 cup brown sugar, firmly packed (I used light brown)
1 TB espresso powder (I used 1 Starbuck's Via)
1 ts vanilla extract
2 1/4 cups flour (I used 2 cups)
1/2 ts baking powder
1/2 ts salt
(I added 1 ts cinnamon)
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips (I used 1 ½ cups)
2 TB milk (I used half & half)
1 TB butter (I used 3 TB)
3/4 cup powdered sugar
1/4 tsp. cinnamon
Preheat the oven to 375 F with the rack at the middle level.
Mix the flour, baking powder and salt, set aside.
Line a 10×15 inch jelly roll pan with baking parchment or grease lightly.
Cream together the butter, brown sugar, instant coffee, and vanilla.
Blend in the flour mixture, until just combined, no overmixing. Then stir in the chocolate chips by hand. The mixture will be very crumbly, with barely enough dough to hold together the chocolate chips.
Use your fingers, palms, and heels of your hands to press the dough evenly into the pan. If necessary, cover the dough with wax or parchment paper and use a small rolling pin to flatten the lumps.
Bake 5 minutes, rotate the pan, and bake 5 to 10 minutes more or until the edges are just starting to brown (watch carefully). Cool in the pan 5 minutes before spreading with glaze.
For the glaze, put all the ingredients in a small saucepan on medium heat. Whisk until smooth and barely bubbly. Drizzle the glaze evenly over the bars and smooth out to the edges and corners with a rubber spatula.
Cool until the pan is just warm to the touch and cut into bars with a sharp knife.
Should make 28-32 bars.


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WASHINGTON (AP) — Its place assured alongside Medicare and Medicaid, President Barack Obama's health care law is now in a sprint to the finish line, with just 11 months to go before millions of uninsured people can start signing up for coverage.
But there are hurdles in the way.
Republican governors, opposed to what they deride as "Obamacare," will have to decide whether they somehow can join the team. And the administration could stumble under the sheer strain of carrying out the complex legislation, or get tripped up in budget talks with Congress.
"The clarity brought about by the election is critical," said Andrew Hyman of the nonpartisan Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. "We are still going to be struggling through the politics, and there are important policy hurdles and logistical challenges. But we are on a very positive trajectory." Hyman oversees efforts to help states carry out the law.
In the two years since passage of the Affordable Care Act, the Obama administration has been consumed with planning and playing political defense. Now it has to quickly turn to execution.
States must notify Washington a week from Friday whether they will be setting up new health insurance markets, called exchanges, in which millions of households as well as small businesses will shop for private coverage. The Health and Human Services Department will run the exchanges in states that aren't ready or willing.
Open enrollment for exchange plans is scheduled to start Oct. 1, 2013, and coverage will be effective Jan. 1, 2014.
In all, more than 30 million uninsured people are expected to gain coverage under the law. About half will get private insurance through the exchanges, with most receiving government help to pay premiums.
The rest, mainly low-income adults without children at home, will be covered through an expansion of Medicaid. While the federal government will pay virtually all the additional Medicaid costs, the Supreme Court gave states the leeway to opt out of the expansion. That gives states more leverage but also adds to the uncertainty over how the law will be carried out.
A steadying force within the administration is likely to be HHS Secretary Kathleen Sebelius. The former Kansas governor has said she wants to stay in her job until the law is fully enacted. "I can't imagine walking out the door in the middle of that," she told The Kansas City Star during the Democratic convention. Her office declined to comment Wednesday.
Republicans will be leading more than half the states, so governors are going to be her main counterparts.
Some, like Rick Perry of Texas and Rick Scott of Florida, have drawn a line against helping carry out Obama's law. In other states, voters have endorsed a hard stance. Missouri voters passed a ballot measure Tuesday that would prohibit establishment of a health insurance exchange unless the Legislature approves. State-level challenges to the federal law will continue to be filed in court.
But other GOP governors have been on the fence, awaiting the outcome of the election. All eyes will be on pragmatists like Chris Christie of New Jersey and Bob McDonnell of Virginia, whose states have done considerable planning of their own to set up exchanges.
"Republican governors are at the center of the health care universe right now," said Michael Ramlet, health policy director at the American Action Forum, a center-right think tank. "They do not have a uniform position across the board."
GOP governors are pressing Sebelius on whether the administration will approve partial, less costly Medicaid expansions. There has been no ruling yet.
On health insurance exchanges, some governors whose states aren't likely to be completely ready are considering the administration's offer of running the new markets through a partnership.
"The real question for Republican governors is, 'Are you going to let the feds come into your state?'" Ramlet said. "The question for the Obama administration is whether they are going to have more flexibility."
Major regulations due shortly and covering issues including exchange operations, benefits and protections for people with pre-existing health problems could signal the administration's willingness to compromise.
A recent check by The Associated Press found 16 states and the District of Columbia on track to setting up their own exchanges, while nine have decided they will not do so. The federal government could end up running the new markets in half or more of the states.
As far as Medicaid, 11 states and the District of Columbia have indicated they will expand their programs, while six have said they will not. That leaves more than 30 states undecided.
On Capitol Hill, Republicans say if a budget deal is going to include tax increases, it must also come with cuts to the health care law, or money-saving delays in its implementation.
While major changes can't be ruled out, they don't seem very likely to former Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle, D-S.D., who is close to the administration.
"I think Democrats are increasingly emboldened about the health care act," Daschle said. "The president won re-election partly by defending it. There is a new dynamic around the health care effort."
Republican attempts to amend the law will continue, he added, but outright repeal is no longer a possibility. "Budgetary issues will continue to be a big question mark," said Daschle.


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Derek Lowe (1-0) vs. Jeff Bennett (0-0).
COMMENTS: Lowe got 11 runs of run support in his last outing, a far cry from what he saw last year, and he rolled to a victory over the Padres. Furcal and Loney are crushing the ball, batting .407 and batting .364 respectively. Meanwhile, Bennett is from Donelson, Tennessee.
Andruw Jones returns to Turner Field (a wee bit heavier) for the first time as a non-Brave.
The lineup:
Furcal, SS
Kemp, RF
Ethier, LF
Kent, 2B
Loney, 1B
Martin, C
Jones, CF
Garciaparra, 3B
Lowe, P


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Life in FL is full of unexpected expenses that require urgent solutions. Chattanooga payday loans online are a number-one service in the state financial market. Recently, they've become more flexible and affordable thanks to much competition out there. Some providers offer savings programs while others work around the clock. All of them feature 72-hours of time to reconsider and cancel an agreement. As you can see, direct lenders are getting closer to people today.
However, many borrowers still struggle to understand the essence of payday loans. It means false expectations and leads to a cycle of debts. The information below helps fill gaps, be aware of key features, and stuff behind the scene. You will know how and where to scare up a few bob to handle sudden financial problems. You'll see your opportunities within the current state law. So, let's see what does payday loans Chattanooga no credit check mean?
First, it is about a small sum of money you can borrow from a lender for short periods at high-interest rates. Every state has its set of rules, but federal law is the primary regulator. Let's see Chattanooga loans' features:
- An applicant can request $100 –$500, but some operators allow borrowing even $50.
- The loan's duration is from 7 to 31 days.
- It's necessary to pay in full.
- Average APR is 304%.
- Additional fees cannot exceed 10% per $100.
- The verification fee is up to $5.
So, unlike many other states, Chattanooga in TN law allows short-term loans and regulates them. It protects a borrower from open interest rates. Besides, it prevents lending companies from physical and mental prosecution if a client cannot repay a loan.
Chattanooga Payday Loans Online – How Do They Work?
Progress does not stand still, making lenders constantly monitor new technologies. Chattanooga payday loans online has become common and feature advanced security and privacy. They ensure safe transactions and a minimum of time to spend on agreeing. The best companies have both online platforms and physical stores to cater to the vaster audience's needs.
Many people are still not computer-savvy and prefer to apply to live managers in the office. At the same time, a decent online service has a phone number on its website to let a customer contact a pro for counseling. Generally, the process of getting money in advance is the same:
- Choose an operator.
- Fill in the form.
- Provide the necessary papers.
- Get an approval.
- Get money deposited on your account/card.
Although Chattanooga payday loans online are fast and require minimum documents, consider the nuances described below. They will save your time and nerves from delays and wrong steps.
Online Payday Loans Chattanooga in Tennessee – Can a Lender Ensure Approval?
The Internet is full of ads where they claim 100% of approval for all applicants. The percentage is high, and a borrower gets cash in the majority of cases. However, some obstacles might get in the way of your plans. If you make a mistake in the application form or lack a paper, a lender will point to the problem and tell you what you need to get the approval. Rejections are possible, but it's always possible to fix a situation and get a loan online.
Remember that a legit company always requires some papers and has a set of rules. If a lender has no interest in your financial capability, you are better to get it around here. Legit online payday loans Chattanooga in TN follow the law and work closely with the customers. This approach lets the clients to repay a loan and the lenders – to escape avid non-payers. So, you should always check a lender for eligibility to know that your approval won't backfire.
Checkmate Payday Loans Chattanooga in Tennessee: Should You Wait for Cash After Approval?
Payday loans are usually fast and easy. It cannot be otherwise, since people need money at a critical juncture. The entire period between the approval and getting funds is from 15 minutes up to 24 hours. It's not possible to declare an accurate time beforehand. Some factors influence the process and require your attention to speed things up:
- Choose faxless online services, since sending fax might be a problem. Not all customers have such equipment near
- Prepare payments beforehand.
- Reconcile your expectations and needs with a lender's offers.
- Fill out forms correctly.
The only thing you should not care about is your credit score. If you want to deal with the bank, you can hardly count on money with even an average score. The payday providers don't consider it crucial and usually approve even customers with a bad credit. You can apply for any lender despite your poor level between 300 and 579. However, high-interest rates are the price of no credit check.
Is It Possible to Get Several Loans at a Time?
The law bans rollovers, making it impossible to gram multiple payday advance loans Chattanooga in Tennessee. You cannot contact with the same lender for several loans. It's also impossible to take loans from different lenders at the same time. You won't be able to hide your debt since the providers check it in the dedicated register. The service monitors transactions and gives lenders full access to check their clients. In this way, the state law seeks to save people from endless debts. On the other hand, the operators feature fewer chances to face the financially incapable customer.
Only a single loan at a time is possible. Of course, you can take another one once you've covered the previous date. However, consider the cooling-off period of 24 hours. This period is necessary to weigh the pros and cons and make a wise decision before asking for money. Moreover, any client has 72 hours to reconsider and break an agreement. In this way, the law provides people with a way out.
Payday loans Chattanooga Online and Offline: Extra Fees to Consider
Payday loans Chattanooga no checking account imply some fees that a customer should know:
- Annual percentage rate (APR) based on average $300 borrowed.
- Finance charge of no more than 10% per hundred dollars.
- Verification fee of a maximum of $5 regardless of the amount borrowed.
Note that APR is dependable of the loan's duration being as lower as longer the period of the agreement. As you can see, the system might be a bit overwhelming for novices. There is nothing to worry about since the lenders help with calculation and point them out in the contract.
Payday Loans Chattanooga No Credit Check – Tips to Get Them Fast
Payday loans Chattanooga no credit check don't meet strict requirements, but they still need some preparation. What are the crucial factors that determine your success?
- A customer should be employed and provide a lender with a bank statement or other regular income proof.
- Note that some lenders don't accept allowance as a source of income.
- It's necessary to have a state-recognized ID.
- You should provide an operator with a future check to ensure a payout.
- You must be over 18 years old to qualify for a loan.
Details might differ from one lender to another, but not drastically. The critical requirement is common for all companies, i.e., any applicant should have income/revenue.
Easy Payday Loans Chattanooga in TN – Why Might They Become a Challenge?
In extreme violation of no-credit-check payday loans in Chattanooga of Tennessee, the latter usually results in a refusal. People often don't understand the reasons and start resenting lenders. Then, they give up after the first try and burst into dubious organizations or individuals for help. The strategy is doomed to fail. That's why consider the following info to escape unpleasant situations.
The first thing to remember is that if one lender doesn't approve your request, another might not be so strict. However, you shouldn't rely on a happy occasion. It's crucial to fill out an online form or document in the store correctly. This rule is especially valid for online providers, since there is no a near-me manager to point out the mistake.
Check your eligibility thoroughly and with no rush. Think about your income: whether it is enough to qualify for a loan. If you have doubts, find a part-time day job. Make sure that your ID is valid and provide an active email address in the case of applying for online service. Your real-life data must coincide with the information you've declared in your request.
Chattanooga payday loans – Are They Affordable Enough to Repay?
As many as 12 million Americans apply to lenders annually when they need money. Such a popularity witnesses the loans' relative affordability. However, Chattanooga payday loans are still expensive, as other services around the country. They will cost 35% more than personal loans, 10% more than debt management programs, and up to 30% more than credit cards. Let's see the payday loan repayment example:
- Loan Amount: $300.
- Loan Term: 14 days.
- Ten-percent finance charge (per $100): $90.
- Verification fee: $5.
- Total repayment: $300 + $140.28 + $90 + $5 = 535.28.
- Cost of Loan: $235.28.
The results might be different since various operators estimate their finance charges and verification fee. However, remember that they cannot exceed 10% per $100 and $5, respectively. The most tricky is to calculate APR considering the loan duration. Many online platforms have dedicated calculators to get a quick answer. Besides, managers from lending companies can explain to you every nuance and clarify uncertainties. In this way, people can see whether they can handle Chattanooga payday loans.
24 hour Payday Loans Chattanooga of Tennessee – How to Cope with Repayment?
Whether you are looking for in-store of online loans, the repayment process is the same. In other words, you have to pay in full after the expiry. Many people struggle to cover this debt and fall into the endless spiral of loans. There is nothing to worry about if you have a cool head and consider way outs below as the alternatives for 24 hour payday loans Chattanooga in TN:
- The Earnin app delivers money in advance to your account. The largest sum available is $100 per day, with extra charges up to $15.
- Personal loans come with long terms (up to two years) and allow paying monthly installments. It features compassionate interest rates and is perfect for consolidation debts. However, a borrower should often wait for several days to obtain it.
- The OppLoans is a cross between a payday and personal loans. It is fast and doesn't attach importance to credit score. Besides, this service can provide instant money and offer more than payday lenders. However, their charges exceed the personal loan's ones.
- Credit cards can pinch-hit in emergencies if you have a balance transfer credit card to move funds to a card you've already used. In this way, you escape interest rates and overdraft.
Cash loans online and other credits might not help when you go to them too often. If you want to end with the 24 hour payday loans Chattanooga TN, try to make a deal with the lender. You may use a 60-day grace period to collect the required amount. Besides, it's possible to ask for an extended payment plan (EPP).
Wrong Steps and Mistake: Measures You Shouldn't Take
The phrase "I need a loan" might buzz around like a gnat. Nevertheless, that's not the point of getting involved with some bad stuff. If you have already contacted Illegal lenders, just contact state regulators and file a complaint to stop paying. In the case of facing collectors, call the police to get rid of wrongful prosecution.
The pawnshops are also a bad alternative for payday loans Chattanooga near me. They have tons of high fees and, besides, can leave you without a computer, jewelry, and other valuables. A student loan is a decent choice, but only if a federal organization provides it. Private firms cannot offer reasonable interest rates and terms of a loan.
A car title loan also has its pitfalls, meaning high-interest rates and quick repayment. Besides, it requires payments on or before the due date. A car title loan might be even worse than a payday loan since a lender can repossess your vehicle. However, a car value determines the amount of a loan. That's why you can count on a more substantial sum than a payday lender can provide.
Best Payday Loans Chattanooga – How to Grab Them Fast?
The pay day loan Chattanooga of Tennessee can either involve you in a cycle of debts or solve your financial problem. The outcome depends on a lender, mostly. Our online service makes it possible to find a credible operator for minutes. You'll contact the best companies that feature attractive offers and flexible terms. Moreover, you'll know the latest news, trends, and improvements in the payday loan market. Our counseling, tips, and recommendations allow borrowers to feel protected. You'll make a wise choice and save time on searching for appropriate conditions.


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Squatinella Video No. 728k Stream Rotifers belonging to this genus are commonly found in littoral (shoreline) habitats among aquatics. In most species, the corona is covered by a semicircular shield, which is used to scrape small organisms into the mouth while browsing over underwater plants. In the laboratory, it is nearly impossible to pick them up with a pipette as they glide swiftly along the surface of a dish or slide. Questions or comments? Send us an email.© 1995-2022 by Michael W. Davidson and The Florida State University. All Rights Reserved. No images, graphics, software, scripts, or applets may be reproduced or used in any manner without permission from the copyright holders. Use of this website means you agree to all of the Legal Terms and Conditions set forth by the owners.
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What is a hemangioma?
A hemangioma is a type of birthmark. It is the most common benign (noncancerous) tumor of the skin. Hemangiomas may be present at birth (faint red mark) or may appear in the first months after birth. A hemangioma is also known as a port wine stain, strawberry hemangioma, and salmon patch. About 60 percent of hemangiomas occur in the head or neck area. Hemangiomas occur at least three times more often in females than in males. Most will continue to grow for the first six to 12 months of life before beginning to shrink.
What is a vascular malformation?
A vascular malformation is another type of birthmark, or congenital (present at birth) growth, made up of arteries, veins, capillaries, or lymphatic vessels. There are several different types of malformations and they are named according to which type of blood vessel is predominantly affected. A vascular malformation is also known as lymphangioma, arteriovenous malformation, and vascular gigantism.
What is the difference between a hemangioma and a vascular malformation?
Most hemangiomas are not usually present at birth or are very faint red marks. Shortly after birth, however, they grow rapidly–often faster than the child's growth. Over time, they become smaller (involute) and lighter in color. The process of involution may take several years.
Vascular malformations are present at birth and enlarge proportionately with the growth of the child. They do not involute spontaneously and may become more apparent as the child grows.
What causes hemangiomas and vascular malformations?
The cause for hemangiomas and vascular malformations is usually sporadic (occurs by chance). However, they can also be inherited in a family as an autosomal dominant trait. Autosomal dominant means that one gene is necessary to express the condition, and the gene is passed from parent to child with a 50/50 risk for each pregnancy. Males and females are equally affected and there is great variability in expression of the gene. In other words, a parent may unknowingly have had a hemangioma because it faded, but the child is more severely affected. The family may not come to the attention of a geneticist until the birth of the child with a more severe condition. Other relatives with mild expression of the gene are often discovered at that time, confirming autosomal dominant inheritance.
Hemangiomas and vascular malformations are a manifestation of many different genetic syndromes that have a variety of inheritance patterns and chances for reoccurrence, depending on the specific syndrome present.
What should I do if my child has a hemangioma or vascular malformation?
If a hemangioma or vascular malformation is very large or affects the breathing system (airway or lungs) or another large organ system, it could be life-threatening. If a hemangioma has uncontrollable bleeding, this could also be life-threatening. Depending on where a hemangioma or vascular malformation is, it may cause physical problems, such as with moving a part of the body or difficulty seeing. Large and/or life-threatening lesions should be evaluated by a multidisciplinary team of specialists that includes plastic surgeons, dermatologists, ophthalmologists, radiologists, and other specialists, depending on what organs are involved.
Treatment for hemangiomas
Treatment for hemangiomas depends on their size, location, and severity. Treatment is usually not recommended for small, noninvasive hemangiomas, since they will become smaller (involute) on their own. However, hemangiomas that cause bleeding problems, feeding or breathing difficulties, growth disturbances, or impairment of vision may require medical or surgical intervention.
Treatment may include the following:
- Steroid medications
- Embolization of the blood vessels (injection of material into the blood vessels to block the blood inflow)
- Laser or surgical removal
Treatment for vascular malformations
Treatment for vascular malformations depends on the type of the malformation. Each type of malformation is treated differently. Laser therapy is usually effective for capillary malformations or port wine stains, which tend to be flat, violet or red patches on the face. Arterial malformations are often treated by embolization (blood flow into malformation is blocked by injecting material near the lesion). Venous malformations are usually treated by direct injection of a sclerosing (clotting) medication which causes clotting of the channels. Most often, a combination of these various treatments is used for effective management of the lesion.