text:
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Babel Fish Needed
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Well, this cake is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike that.
So far I've assembled a list of 42 different words that this might be, including "@Loehoe," "Soekuc,"and "Slartibartfast." And yes, so far as I know, this is supposed to be "English."
Anyway, I've given up.
In fact, I can't help but be impressed by this individual's cryptography skills. Hey NSA, I've got your next Enigma machine right here! Think about it: for the cost of a piping bag and some chocolate, you'll never have to fear Wikileaks again. Eh?
So long, Jackie W., and thanks for all the fish.
Achtung!!! Es tut mir leid; Ich bin eine Sachertorte! Fahrvergnügen! Neenër neenër!
268 comments | Post a Comment
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- chante - March 30, 2011 at 9:32 AM
- weirdmom said...
I see a few options:
King's Cake - March 30, 2011 at 9:32 AM
Yeah for the Hitchhikers reference!
Don't forget your towel!
No idea what the cake says though. - March 30, 2011 at 9:33 AM
I do like the way the fiddl-y bits look a little like fjords on this cake, though.
And yeah, no idea what it says. Maybe it's Klingon? - March 30, 2011 at 9:34 AM
- Sally said...
I think it says "Sadie"
- March 30, 2011 at 9:35 AM
I think it's supposed to be "Sacher," as in sacher torte.
- March 30, 2011 at 9:35 AM
- Marissa and Aidan said...
- March 30, 2011 at 9:36 AM
I'll bet my paycheck that says "SACHER"... of course I'm "self-employed", so really it's not giving up anything...
- March 30, 2011 at 9:38 AM
- vonna513 said...
Aloha. Spelled REALLY poorly.
- March 30, 2011 at 9:39 AM
- Gloom Raider said...
At first, I thought it said "Lecher."
- March 30, 2011 at 9:44 AM
- de Pe a Pa said...
Seeker to me too
- March 30, 2011 at 9:44 AM
i have to agree that it says sacher... very poorly written (and baked for that matter) but its a sachertorte...
- March 30, 2011 at 9:45 AM
It is definitely "Sacher" you know, the Austrian chocolate-cake?
^^ - March 30, 2011 at 9:46 AM
After wrestling with the meaning of that cake I'm going to need a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster....
- March 30, 2011 at 9:46 AM
Ford Prefect? - March 30, 2011 at 9:48 AM
- LitLaur said...
My guess is "sacher" too, but if I didn't know what sacher torte generally looks like, I would have said "Slartibartfast" was the best option.
- March 30, 2011 at 9:49 AM
I think it looks like "twelve."
Maybe it's like one of those inkblot tests, and whatever we think it says says something deep and important about our psyches.
Or maybe the wreckerator was stoned. One or the other. - March 30, 2011 at 9:50 AM
Sacher... that makes sense! I was wondering if it was upside-down or maybe some sort of mirror writing!!
- March 30, 2011 at 9:50 AM
- Niki said...
geesh...it looks like "loeber" or "soeber" to me...either way the cake actually looks like it would taste good...anything is better covered in ganache!
- March 30, 2011 at 9:51 AM
I think it says "Seeker". : D
- March 30, 2011 at 9:51 AM
- Laura said...
It looks kind of like "Sseko" with an extra swirl or "e" on the end. Sseeko's are a fabulous pair of sandals I just received for my birthday with interchangeable straps... Still, I'm not sure who could read this!
WV: "ilars" the wrecky version of "liars"?? - March 30, 2011 at 9:52 AM
Amongst the horrors that we've seen on this blog, I hope that we could agree that this one is mostly harmless. However, I would like to see your list of 42 words that you are considering. :)
- March 30, 2011 at 9:52 AM
My money's on "Locker."
- March 30, 2011 at 9:52 AM
- Ann Onimous said...
I'm thinking "sister" without the T crossed.
And if it were a king cake, it would look more like a donut. :)
WV: berate. It's so easy and fun to berate these cakes. - March 30, 2011 at 9:54 AM
Don't panic... we'll find the hidden meaning behind this one. Perhaps it's God's second-to-last message to mankind? Or maybe an example of Vogon poetry? Someone dig out the Scrabble pieces; if we draw them randomly out of a bag, I'm sure we'll come up with the answer.
In the end, though, I'm seconding the "EPCOT" suggestion. This post = Epic Win. - March 30, 2011 at 9:54 AM
- Dorothy said...
Maybe it says
? - March 30, 2011 at 9:54 AM
- Kris McDermott said...
I agree with "sacher," although considering the amount of time I just spent studying it, it could also be "Sucker!"
- March 30, 2011 at 9:57 AM
- Turi Becker said...
I keep seeing "Ivanhoe", for some reason.
- March 30, 2011 at 9:57 AM
- Unknown said...
I know this is really bad, but I kept seeing the word "alcohol" written... I kept wondering why someone would write that on a cake to begin with, but I've seen enough on this sight to know not to even start to wonder about anything!
- March 30, 2011 at 9:58 AM
- Michelle Krassan said...
If you trace the lines from start to finish (which I just completely had my 6th grade class do. Put this on the overhead projector in class last 5 minutes... used markers on white board, then turned projector off. Scientific experiment, right?)
We got Loeber. Class of kids all agreed on it. It must be so. - March 30, 2011 at 9:58 AM
- Jessica said...
My wv was salis. Maybe that's it.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:01 AM
Socker? Maybe they were going for soccar?
- March 30, 2011 at 10:02 AM
I saw the word, "sucker". Now I can't un-see it.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:02 AM
- Kimberly said...
It says "sacher". It's a sacher torte..but it's very poorly written for sure.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:03 AM
- Unknown said...
It says "Lover."
- March 30, 2011 at 10:03 AM
- Studyaid said...
I thought it said aleeve, it sure is giving me a headache trying to figure it out.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:07 AM
- Loo-E Loo-I said...
I'm dizzy trying to decipher all those loops!
I read "aSeeeher". Maybe it's Huttese for "I see her" ;-)
wv: pututic: A cake or CCC that makes you want to wretch "Patooie!" is pututic.
Heck, even this word could be what is written on that cake for all I know! - March 30, 2011 at 10:09 AM
- Isolder74 said...
I'm stuck. What can it be?
A Vogon name in triplicate?
Dolphin for more fish please?
A cake after using the infinite probability drive and it never recovered? - March 30, 2011 at 10:09 AM
- Janine said...
I see "teacher" written really badly with an old-fashioned cursive capital T. If it does say that, I hope the recipient didn't teach penmanship.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:12 AM
It's "Belgium" -- used most gratuitously on this cake -- and WOW, am I offended. It was clearly written by a mattress named Zem in the script of Sqornshellous Zeta between willomying and flolloping floopily.
So long, and thanks for all the cakes. - March 30, 2011 at 10:12 AM
- Mary Kirkland said...
To me it looks like, saeeheo...maybe they are speeking Klingon.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:15 AM
- Ashley said...
I very distinctly see "Sucker" with an ugly U and a frilly R.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:15 AM
I am guessing Jackie since that is who submitted the picture. But still, the writing is very fancy schmancy. ;)
- March 30, 2011 at 10:16 AM
I thought it says "Later", but after reading the comments i might agree with Sacher, but that's no fun at all!
- March 30, 2011 at 10:16 AM
- TisforTonya said...
no idea... but now I want to re-read my Hitchhikers books!
- March 30, 2011 at 10:18 AM
- PeaceLoveMath said...
I've never commented before, but I just had to share this time:
I usually get your nerdy references, because I am a pretty big nerd. But today I am especially proud of myself, because before i had scrolled down enough to see anything but the first 2 sentences and the first cake, I already knew you were doing Hitchhiker's only because of the "almost, but not quite, entirely unlike that" line. I guess the babel fish probably had my brain unconsciously going in that direction anyway, but anyway.
Related story you might be interested in: a while after Douglas Adams died suddenly, they did a related story on BBC World Service News Hour with Owen Bennet Jones, who at the end of the hour would always read a couple of listener e-mails that had come in during that show. I was quite sad about Adams' death, so I dashed off an e-mail about how I'd be re-reading all of Adams' books right now if it weren't for the fact that I had to re-read all the Harry Potter books before the next one came out, and what a loss his death was, and Owen Bennet Jones read my e-mail on the air! I about peed myself with excitement. I'm just a little American nerd, and here was my e-mail on the BBC World Service News Hour! It is one of the nerd highlights of my life.
In conclusion, YAY for HHGTTG. Love. - March 30, 2011 at 10:18 AM
- Unknown said...
- March 30, 2011 at 10:18 AM
I'm seeing Soiker or Loiker?
- March 30, 2011 at 10:19 AM
- Monica said...
Argh. All of the Hitchhiker's Guide references I can think of have been used already.
Wait! It says "Stavro." As in "Stavro Mula Beta." Yeah. - March 30, 2011 at 10:20 AM
- Hannah B said...
I am also going with "sucker." Maybe the cake is full of plastic babies hidden amongst the chocolate, lurking and waiting for their next victim to bite.
wv: bedentic - The condition in which one finds oneself when one's bed is suddenly smashed by a bulldozer. - March 30, 2011 at 10:27 AM
- Viewtiful_Justin said...
Looks like "sucker" to me. I think we've all been had, staring at this cake for an hour trying to figure out what it says! Sucker, indeed!
- March 30, 2011 at 10:29 AM
- Drew Thaler said...
I read it as "Speker". Intended to be "Speaker", but with both the A and the descender of the P missing.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:30 AM
I see this: "Hey, which of you pre-schoolers wants to come and squeeze out the last of the icing onto this cake?"
wv- hurthari: She dropped the vase and now hurthari. - March 30, 2011 at 10:31 AM
- Michelle Lee said...
It's Sacher, as in Sachertorte, a Viennese chocolate cake.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:33 AM
- Jazzbeau said...
It's likely Sacher. The apricot filled tort. DON'T PANIC!
Jazzbeau - March 30, 2011 at 10:33 AM
Definitely Sacher, but I had to use my Babel Fish to get that one.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:34 AM
- Unknown said...
It says "We apologize for the inconvenience."
Thanks for the Hitchhikers theme!!
-Lisa - March 30, 2011 at 10:35 AM
- Unknown said...
Let's run over it with a bulldozer.
wv: corqu: UK swear phrase. - March 30, 2011 at 10:38 AM
Gotta be "Sacher", Austrian for "very dry chocolate-ish cake that looks like it might be good but isn't." They make so many of these cakes for tourists, looks like they've given up trying to make them readable.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:41 AM
- Unknown said...
I first saw a misspelled "Sleeve". Seelve?
- March 30, 2011 at 10:41 AM
- eniko76 said...
I am also inclined to see Seeker, although that looks NOTHINg like a snitch!
- March 30, 2011 at 10:43 AM
- scyllacat said...
I had "teacher" then I saw all the votes for "Sacher" and apparently, it does LOOK like a Sacher torte and they frequently write it on said tortes.
Although I want it to say "daisies" now. - March 30, 2011 at 10:44 AM
I'm with Amelia, but that may just be because I'm dieting and my first thought upon seeing chocolate cake was "Hello, Lover." And for some reason it sounds like Barry White's voice in my head.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:44 AM
- Molly said...
You just made my morning with the Hitchhiker's references :)
- March 30, 2011 at 10:48 AM
Maybe it says "So Long!" (And thanks for all the fish?)
WV: "pelab" - where they should have tested this wreckerator for drugs. - March 30, 2011 at 10:50 AM
That's disgusting! You should remember that children might see this blog, and they don't need to be exposed to words like that.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:54 AM
- kathryn said...
Pretty sure it says "AloeHoe"
whatever that means.. - March 30, 2011 at 10:56 AM
- Donna said...
Aloehoe...for someone addicted to aloe?
wv: torfl - because it's as much of a word as the inscription on that cake - March 30, 2011 at 10:56 AM
- Brilliantpants said...
I'm impressed! Four Hitchiker's Guide refernces in such a short post!
- March 30, 2011 at 11:00 AM
- Debbie said...
It's been so long since I read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy! Love the reference!
- March 30, 2011 at 11:01 AM
- bassgirl said...
I agree it could be "Jackie", since that's who submitted it. Whoever produced it, they were sure skimpy on the chocolate frosting!
- March 30, 2011 at 11:02 AM
- March 30, 2011 at 11:10 AM
2 words: Band logo. Slartibartfast is one of my favorite names ever since I read Hitchhikers, but it makes a poor name for one's offspring. Band name is a totally different story.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:13 AM
But why would a sachertorte have to have sacher written on it? And wouldn't it say sachertorte?
And why am I trying to think like a wrecker? - March 30, 2011 at 11:16 AM
it's definately, beyond a doubt, Sacher...when I saw this picture I couldn't figure out what was wrong with it until I read the description. Just because you don't know what a sacher torte is doesn't make this cake a cakewrek.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:19 AM
Freddled gruntbuggly?
- March 30, 2011 at 11:19 AM
- Red said...
People are commenting it says "sacher" meaning a type of cake.... do people really label their cakes by type? I know carrot cakes often have carrots (with or without the babies) on them, but no one actually spells out "carrot" on them, do they??
No way you're going to find out for sure what it says and end all our wondering is there?? I've already wasted too much of my time today staring... O:-) - March 30, 2011 at 11:20 AM
What the heck does that say, I refuse to give myself a headache trying to figure that one out...
- March 30, 2011 at 11:22 AM
- Gary said...
This looks exactly like what preschoolers produce when they pretend to write-- which makes me want to turn in that bakery on suspicion of violating the child labor laws.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:33 AM
- Sam Gamgee said...
Yep. Definitely Belgium.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:33 AM
I like the Rorschach idea. It is a test designed to make you think about life, the universe and, you know, everything.
Why would a sacher torte have the word "sacher" on it? Really, people. - March 30, 2011 at 11:33 AM
Could it be "Lecker" (= yummy, in German....)?
- March 30, 2011 at 11:34 AM
- Laura said...
Oh Douglas Adams... So inspirational. I think the word is Vogon for 42.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:34 AM
- J. R. W. said...
So, I hear you have a list of 42 names?
(and look out--sacher is becoming the new EPCOT) - March 30, 2011 at 11:34 AM
First time commenter, long time follower. First thing I saw was "Seeker", Harry Potter reference perhaps?
- March 30, 2011 at 11:35 AM
I think it's "sochop" - no not "so chop" but "sock hop" only spelled wrong...
Maria - March 30, 2011 at 11:36 AM
Thanks so much for today's giggles. The mice will be pleased.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:48 AM
I am turning *42* today and have often had my first name LeeAnn misspelled.. (Really... you'd be SURPRISED at the number of ways there are to modify and otherwise bungle what was designed to be an easy, two syllable name, my favorite thus far being 'Lean'.) So I'm choosing to believe that cake could *possibly* have been meant to have my name on it. After all, starting today, I can begin to enjoy the ULTIMATE ANSWER to life, the universe and everything!
Have a great day everyone! Jen, John, and everyone that make Cake Wrecks possible have just given my birthday a great start, as they do daily. (it's always someone's birthday somewhere, right?) Keep up the great work! - March 30, 2011 at 11:48 AM
- H Lynnea said...
I can't pronounce it, but I'm pretty sure it's a word that means "something almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea."
- March 30, 2011 at 11:49 AM
- The Beaudoins said...
Can't you read? Clearly it says, "@Loeher"
- March 30, 2011 at 11:50 AM
- Pearljammies said...
It's definitely Salker, they just forgot to add the "Fatherhood."
a wreck upon a wreck thrice removed! - March 30, 2011 at 11:53 AM
- geeky Heather said...
This post made me very happy.
I think it says, "DON'T PANIC", but those are NOT large, friendly letters. - March 30, 2011 at 11:56 AM
Hate to disappoint but it's just a Sacher torte........you know, that stuff some of us Krauts make.
email@example.com - March 30, 2011 at 12:08 PM
following the writing i think it has to be Loehoe? no idea what that means
- March 30, 2011 at 12:21 PM
- TARA said...
Whatever it says I'm sure it'd taste better with a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster!
- March 30, 2011 at 12:32 PM
- AnneJ said...
I'm sure it says Ivanhoe. Well, nearly sure.
- March 30, 2011 at 12:39 PM
This is the cake served at a psychologists convention....mmmm, rorschach cake.
wv: hellf - hellf I know what that cake says! - March 30, 2011 at 12:40 PM
- Unknown said...
Looks like Sucker to me...
- March 30, 2011 at 12:41 PM
I think it's my name!
- March 30, 2011 at 12:49 PM
Great post and great comments!
Why is "Aloha Oe" running through my mind?
Perhaps the person decorating that cake was trying to boldly split infinitives that no man has split before.
Perhaps it was decorated by a small furry creature from Alpha Centauri.
In any case, we should not be surprised. The plan for this cake was clearly displayed in the basement of the bakery for months. - March 30, 2011 at 12:49 PM
i think it is supposed to be a "sacher" torte. a badly done sacher torte.
- March 30, 2011 at 12:50 PM
- Angela said...
My first thought was "Loeher", but now that I've read the comments, it's definitely "Sacher".
Mmm... I could go for some Sachertorte right now. - March 30, 2011 at 12:51 PM
*squints* Hmm, I think it's... umm... nope, I got nothin'.
- March 30, 2011 at 12:53 PM
I say it's SOEHOE.
- March 30, 2011 at 12:54 PM
Imagine, the little label in the pastry case that reads: "Sachertorte". Next, imagine hundreds of customers pointing at the cake and asking "What kind is that?" [brief interlude with chocolate script] Now, the pastry chef can glare at the cusdumber, smile politely and say "See?? It says the name there on the cake! Can you not read?? Eh??"
- Rev W - March 30, 2011 at 12:54 PM
Yep, it's a Sacher Torte. For some reason, it's traditional to write that on top... Imagine if we did that with ALL desserts!
-Amy - March 30, 2011 at 12:57 PM
- Tara/Bunny said...
I know, it says Sookeh!
- March 30, 2011 at 12:58 PM
Best served with Advanced Tea Substitute.*
*Note: To facilitate categorization, this is an attempt to be witty by including a Hitchhiker's reference. - March 30, 2011 at 1:01 PM
- Unknown said...
~Diana - March 30, 2011 at 1:03 PM
@Monica: truly, a mostly harmless wreck. Nicely done.
- March 30, 2011 at 1:04 PM
- emily said...
I agree with the "Sacher" vote, although I'm also liking "Sucker" (which I think would be hilarious) and @Lecher. Or @Loehvl.
- March 30, 2011 at 1:10 PM
- VeggieT said...
Epcot, definitely epcot...
I'd say this baker succeeded, I don't notice the spelling errors at all... - March 30, 2011 at 1:12 PM
That's a Sacher torte!
- March 30, 2011 at 1:17 PM
I laughed as soon as I saw this -- even before all the Hitchhiker's references.
When I was a cake decorator, they hired a lady who came from what she considered an upscale bakery. Everything had to be done like it was done there. One thing she liked to make was a sacher torte, and, yes, she had to write "sacher" on it in big loopy letters. Not because anyone in our little grocery store would know what that is. Just because that's the way they did it at "s" bakery.
Jen - March 30, 2011 at 1:19 PM
- min said...
@Anon at 11:19 - Forgive my ignorance, but unless the Sachertorte tradition also requires the icing label to be illegible, I'm sticking with considering it a wreck. And a darn good one at that! =0)
- March 30, 2011 at 1:21 PM
i got the references! so proud of myself! lol
- March 30, 2011 at 1:23 PM
- Stacey said...
This hoopy frood is going with 42!
- March 30, 2011 at 1:24 PM
- Adorably Dead said...
Kudos to you for actually finding words in that...I got nothing.
- March 30, 2011 at 1:24 PM
It says Sacher, its the traditional way of finishing a Sacher Torte
- March 30, 2011 at 1:25 PM
- Allison said...
I'm pretty sure it does say "Slartibartfast", but I told you it wasn't important.
- March 30, 2011 at 1:26 PM
Soho spelled incorrectly as "Soehoe"
_dee_ - March 30, 2011 at 1:28 PM
- Jessica Gardner said...
It's got to be "Twelve" spelled out in cursive.
- March 30, 2011 at 1:39 PM
- AlisonH said...
Ummm, chocolate. Good bite, and thanks for all the fishing for references! Dolphinitely!
- March 30, 2011 at 1:42 PM
im pretty sure its just random squiggles.
i got nothin' - March 30, 2011 at 1:42 PM
Hooray for Hitchhiker references!
- March 30, 2011 at 1:44 PM
- Betty Cynthia said...
It says 'Sacher'. It's a Sacher Torte...and that's what they always say on them
- March 30, 2011 at 1:50 PM
- DJ said...
I'd like to buy a vowel, Pat?
- March 30, 2011 at 1:58 PM
- Bekah Tuggy said...
I think someone threw the icing at the ground and missed.
- March 30, 2011 at 2:07 PM
- DJ said...
If you gave an infinite number of monkeys an infinite number of piping bags . . .
- March 30, 2011 at 2:16 PM
Well, it's definitely NOT 'Sacher' - if the first letter is a fancy S, then the 2nd doesn't look like an 'a'; and if the 'a' is within with 'S', then there's too many letters. Plus, why write just 'Sacher' on a Sachertorte? I like the suggestion that it's Jackie, with the 'J' and 'e' getting a little out of hand :-)
I loved all the Hitchhiker's refs!!! You're a nerd's angel :-) - March 30, 2011 at 2:26 PM
It says Sacher ,its a traditional sachertorte, austrian cake and that is how you decorate them.
- March 30, 2011 at 2:28 PM
- jbrecken said...
I think the picture of the cake is upside-down.
If you rotate it, it clearly says "Znjoago." - March 30, 2011 at 2:31 PM
oh and it is gratifying to a middle aged Brit (who actually listened to the radio series when it first came on and watched it on BBC tv etc)that you bolshie ex-colonials are so appreciative of such British humour.Do you get the bits that take the p*** of you?
- March 30, 2011 at 2:34 PM
- Jessa Kennedy said...
No, no, you guys, it's one of those three dimensional cakes, where the letters stack on top of each other! So instead of being a single word, it is indeed a whole phrase, which if you have the proper knowledge and technology to read would say:
Attention Lemmings:
It's clearly from Canada. *firm nod* - March 30, 2011 at 2:34 PM
New category: carpel tunnel syndrone [sic]
A restriction of the humor nerve due to repetitive restatement of corrective "facts"
A good sacher-punch need only be delivered once. Any further constitute cake battery - March 30, 2011 at 2:35 PM
Maybe it says: Sacher? As in type of cake Sacher torte?
- March 30, 2011 at 2:42 PM
- Loo-E Loo-I said...
And out come the informers....at what level EPCOT are we now? ;-D
It's probably Zaphod's 'autograph'.
wv: ductrola: When all else fails...ductrola it! - March 30, 2011 at 2:45 PM
- the ginabean said...
Oh, GOOD! I'm not the only one without a clue as to what the what that's supposed to say...
- March 30, 2011 at 2:51 PM
I'm going against the (Epcot) flow...
I think it says, "Seder," but I'm not Jewish, so I don't know how likely it is that a Seder cake would be labeled that way. - March 30, 2011 at 2:53 PM
- Heather said...
I have always loved you, but the Hitchiker's references just made me love you even more!
- March 30, 2011 at 2:53 PM
Informer warning (plus highly superior):
When I was in Austria last summer, all the Sachertortes were plain, even those from the Sacher hotel. - March 30, 2011 at 4:11 PM
I hate to admit this, but I actually see the "Sacher". The thing that looks like a duck is an S, the thing that looks like a peach is an a, the thing that looks like an e is a c, the thing that looks like someone was testing a pen is an h, the second thing that looks like an e really is an e, and the thing that looks like the gear fell off your spirograph is an r.
- March 30, 2011 at 4:11 PM
- Angie said...
I don't know why fifty million people all gotta tell you the same thing, but then again, even if I squint really hard, turn my monitor upside down & my head sideways, I still can't see "sacher" in that writing. So what do I know?
I love you guys. - March 30, 2011 at 4:12 PM
- Hadassah's Fate said...
- March 30, 2011 at 4:16 PM
I'm thinking this person either loves or hates True Blood, because that cake definitely says "SOOKEH!"
- March 30, 2011 at 4:27 PM
YES! Thank you for the HGTTG references!
- March 30, 2011 at 4:33 PM
- Unknown said...
The mice made that one for Arthur
- March 30, 2011 at 4:35 PM
That's my best guess. - March 30, 2011 at 4:36 PM
- Micalah said...
Only one cake?
Where did you get the German from??? - March 30, 2011 at 4:39 PM
- deborah said...
I agree with the other poster that it looks like" twelve" to me. The First letter is supposed to be a fancy "T", not an "S".
- March 30, 2011 at 4:45 PM
- Unknown said...
It is a Sacher torte. It is a traditional cake, and only true sacher tortes are allowed to have 'sacher' written across the top. Though now everyone does it. Obviously this one was poorly written
- March 30, 2011 at 4:46 PM
@ diddleymaz
Says the middle-age bolshoi ex-colonial:
Shall I read you some of my poetry? - March 30, 2011 at 4:49 PM
- Gina said...
OMG...I ran across a total "The Storyteller" comment as I was reading them...didja see it? Didja, didja? Huh? I thought it spelled "Sober" and we were celebrating someone's 12 Steps. ;) Have no idea what the heck a "Sacher Torte" is, but apparently tens of people say that's what it is.
wv: dineu (French for "no knowledge of") as in, "I dineu what that cake says." - March 30, 2011 at 4:50 PM
The more I look at it, the more it looks like "Sacher."
Upside down it sort of kind of looks like "Lopez." - March 30, 2011 at 4:55 PM
Well, dontchya know, it's the first ever Word Verification Cake! It spells out a different nonsense word for everyone!
wv: sconitis
While WV tells me this cake says 'sconitis', it's more likely the baker had come down with a bad case of sconitis while making this cake, poor dear! - March 30, 2011 at 5:07 PM
You guys are some really hoopy froods! Brill post! First though: Seeker, but Slartibartfast is so much better. Then again, it is not important. Now I must hurry to make a brew, or I shall be late. As in the late...
So long, and thanks for all the laughs!
A Yorkshire lass in SCOTLAND!! - March 30, 2011 at 5:17 PM
- Maxine Dangerous said...
I'll bet if you get drunk and squint, you could be led to believe the cake says "alcohol." Hell, I'm sober now and I believe it. ;)
- March 30, 2011 at 5:19 PM
I see "Seeker" too.
- Samantha - March 30, 2011 at 5:32 PM
#1 The message was to have been 'Share and Enjoy', but something happened during the Great EPCOTs of 2011 so that it now reads: 'Go Stick Your Head in a Pig.'
This is why torte reform is needed.
[Gratuitous sequential label for categorization purposes only.] - March 30, 2011 at 5:32 PM
- St0n3henge said...
I left my Babelfish on Vogsphere, but I think this says Soeber. Maybe someone is celebrating a successful graduation from a twelve-step program.
- March 30, 2011 at 5:36 PM
- Siouxzr said...
Ach Du Lieber! It is a sacher-torte that says Loeber!
Now the big question-- is it an Eduard Sacher-Torte or an Original Sacher-Torte? Legal battles have been fought for years over the question.
wv tingshel-- By tomorrow the Epcot will be over and tingshel be better. - March 30, 2011 at 5:42 PM
- Avalyn said...
Sailor! Or... Sacher
- March 30, 2011 at 5:50 PM
Having stared long and hard, necessitating a visit to the optician cos that really hurt my eyes, I think that it's supposed to say Sookie.
Ah, Hitchhikers - must read that again soon..... - March 30, 2011 at 5:58 PM
Okay, it's post-because-of-the-wv time again!
Merry at Annie's Book Stop/Sharon, MA
wv: thell - "What thell does that say????" - March 30, 2011 at 6:02 PM
- Unknown said...
- March 30, 2011 at 6:20 PM
- Staci said...
I think it says Soehoe!
- March 30, 2011 at 6:29 PM
I saw right away it says "Sacher". But I have lovely, undecipherable handwriting so I guess I have an unfair advantage.
wv: pardes
Pardes-moi ma 'andwrighteeng, mon petit Loechoe... - March 30, 2011 at 6:54 PM
I really think the word is "Teacher!" I am a fourth grade teacher, and I am therefore exceptionally good at deciphering code-like penmanship.
- March 30, 2011 at 7:01 PM
"Lopez". I love it!
And BB Miami, you are the thing that sounds like a very funny person.
It's "sacher". And I'm going to start labeling everything too: "carrot", "cup", "pointless use of food coloring velvet".
wv: photted. What the decorator did as he used the piping bag.
--Blondie's Mom - March 30, 2011 at 7:26 PM
-Lisha - March 30, 2011 at 7:28 PM
Looks like Seeker to me.
- March 30, 2011 at 7:34 PM
- Minerva said...
Where's "The Informer" when you need them?!
- March 30, 2011 at 7:40 PM
Sitting here drinking a Hurricane in the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
Some of these comments seem like a set-up after yesterday's post. J, J & 1, ya'll must be laughing like mad fools. - March 30, 2011 at 7:48 PM
I see "Sucker" and no one can change my mind!
Except for Loo-E Loo-I @2:45 who said it was Zaphod's autograph, and then I totally saw that on the cake.
But then Slartibartfast42 @5:07 explained that this was the first word verification cake(FTW), bringing me back to my first guess, "Sucker."
Now, MsYendor @2:35 diagnosed the Epcot problem as a "restriction of the humor nerve." Now that we've got the diagnosis, we just need a cure so that posting can continue on a regularly clever basis. - March 30, 2011 at 7:53 PM
- Jamie Kline (Bookerella) said...
It looks like the @ symbol followed by some squiggles
- March 30, 2011 at 7:55 PM
- Unknown said...
I says Aleive!
- March 30, 2011 at 7:55 PM
- Irma said...
Love Hoe??
- March 30, 2011 at 8:03 PM
- littlefoot76 said...
"Soeber" because clearly the baker was too drunk to spell properly.
- March 30, 2011 at 8:15 PM
- Anonymous, for now said...
Yay for the Hitchikers ref! woot woot!
I am thinking it is in the language of the original settlers of the planet 'Now What'. This may be their substitute for swearing similar to our $#*%%%@
? - March 30, 2011 at 8:28 PM
Happy Birthday??
- March 30, 2011 at 8:35 PM
- Caspar said...
This was the perfect follow-up post to yesterday's! You guys are the best - Love and kisses, Zaphod.
- March 30, 2011 at 8:36 PM
It looks to me like something Wonko the Sane's wife made just before going outside to get out of the rain.
But in all fairness, I'm not a hyper-inteligent shade of blue, so what do I know? - March 30, 2011 at 9:02 PM
- Sharell said...
- March 30, 2011 at 9:05 PM
Sacher! As in sacher torte. I smell a culinary school in-class assignment that needed to be checked off!
- March 30, 2011 at 9:18 PM
- Sylph said...
another vote for "Seeker". Maybe they've seen that SyFy version of a really great fantasy series?
- March 30, 2011 at 9:20 PM
- Ruth said...
Love the hitch-hiker's guide references :) Maybe you should try an HHG2theG theme......unless you have already and I missed it lol
- March 30, 2011 at 9:30 PM
I bet Mike Johnson knows what it says
- March 30, 2011 at 9:49 PM
love the Hitchhikers stuff! (I'm a bit of a BBC geek girl - Red Dwarf rules!) but I'd be especially impressed if you do any Dirk Gently references. My embarrassing story on meeting Douglas Adams: he came to California for a book signing. I got to the book store after it was already crowded with fans, so I was sort of in the back trying to see what was going on. A man starts to muscle his way past me to get up to the front. I gave him a dirty look and proceeded to watch him go up to the podium to speak. Yep, it was Mr. Adams himself. Doh! During question time, I kept asking him when he was going to write more Dirk Gently books. He brushed aside my questions (it seemed like he really just wanted to talk about making Hitchhikers into a movie) and gave me dirty looks. Later during the book signing, I noticed he was chatting with every single person who came up to have their book signed. When I came up to him (excited to have the chance to gush about how brilliant he was, how much I loved his writing, etc), he took one look at me, quickly signed my book, gave it back to me and turned to the person after me and started chatting. I guess I deserved it, since I had apparently turned into an annoying possibly stalker fan. {sigh} BTW - his book Last Chance To See - amazing non-fiction tales of endangered species and his travels to see them. Best part of the book: the Australian snake venom expert who kept "fairy cakes" for tea in the venom fridge.
- March 30, 2011 at 9:57 PM
- Uber Idea Girl said...
This cake is obviously from Bill Compton. It clearly says, "Sookeh."
- March 30, 2011 at 9:58 PM
Seeker. Definitely Seeker.
- March 30, 2011 at 10:41 PM
- Unknown said...
Hitchhiker's references on my 42nd birthday! Reason enough to post a comment for the very first time, though I've loved your blog for ages!
- March 30, 2011 at 11:05 PM
- crowleyancanto said...
I think it just might be a person's name. Oh well, it's probably all gone now and at least we have the cryptogram pic to remember it by...
- March 30, 2011 at 11:08 PM
okay, that definitely does NOT say "sacher" in any alphabet that I know how to read...
- March 30, 2011 at 11:12 PM
- exquisite red said...
I thought it was Twelve. And apparently only one person agreed. Ah well.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:26 PM
It definitely says seeker. Of course, it probably looks like that to me because I have too much love for harry potter or something.
- March 30, 2011 at 11:29 PM
- Raine Countryman said...
Maybe speller? Like as if someone won a spelling bee or something? Oh the irony in celebrating a spelling bee win and the baker not spelling speller right! :D
- March 30, 2011 at 11:43 PM
Even though I could follow the jist of your post-script, I ran it through Google Translate to be sure. Imagine my surprise to learn that 'Fahrvergnügen' means 'Driving pleasure'. I didn't think it was *that* kind of wreck! Either I have a very dirty mind, or you do.
- March 31, 2011 at 12:07 AM
- Jo-anne Blossy said...
- March 31, 2011 at 12:31 AM
Note!!! I'm sorry; I am a Sachertorte! Driving pleasure! Neenër neenër!
Driving Pleasure??
I think something is wrong with my babelfish - March 31, 2011 at 12:40 AM
- Wolverine Girl said...
Sacher schmacher - it's clearly a freddled gruntbuggly. Unfortunately, the wreckerator's writing is a little hard to read, and has been ever since they were rended in the gobberwarts with a blurglecruncheon, wielded by a mildly irritated Arcturan Megadonkey who had imbibed one too many Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters.
- March 31, 2011 at 12:58 AM
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What's a Wreck?
What's a Wreck?
A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
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- Ghost Taunters
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This is the third course in the Teach English: Intermediate Grammar specialization. It will be useful to ESL teachers or those interested in learning to teach English language, but it is not an introduction to teaching course. You will learn about some specific problems students have learning intermediate grammar. You will learn why students have trouble with this tricky grammar and find out new ways to help students conquer it. You will also learn a variety of activities for teaching this content in a fun and interesting way. Finally, you will have opportunities to practice the skills you learn by creating sample assignments and recording short videos of your teaching demonstrations using a video camera, webcam, or smartphone. Learners wanting a grade will be required to submit short videos of their teaching skills.
Only learners who pay for the course will be able to take the graded quizzes or submit assignments for feedback. The free version provides access to the lectures and practice activities only.
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text:
The nationwide Occupy movement might be targeting Wall Street, but it's arguably municipal governments that have felt the biggest impact so far.
Protesters have staged weeks-long sit-ins at public spaces in cities from New York to Atlanta to Pittsburgh to Oakland, Calif. Although the demonstrations have been largely peaceful, hundreds of protesters have been arrested and there have been a handful of violent clashes with law enforcement.
Occupy has put mayors of these cities in a delicate situation: balancing respect for civil liberties with the need to maintain law and order and limit the protests' physical toll. The cost of policing the demonstrations has skyrocketed, and there is increasing concern over public sanitation in occupied parks and about keeping protesters safe, especially as winter nears.
There are political questions to be answered here about how municipalities and their police forces weigh not only the interests in public safety but also their interests in maintaining public order and access to public spaces.
And so far, there's no sign that cold weather will put an end to the demonstrations.
"I'm planning to be the last one left in the park," says 18-year-old Ethan Johnson, a North Carolinian at the Occupy D.C. encampment in the city's McPherson Square. "And that's at least until New Year's."
A Unique Challenge
David Sklansky, a law professor at the University of California, Berkeley, says the protests present a unique challenge for city officials and law enforcement.
"There are political questions to be answered here about how municipalities and their police forces weigh not only the interests in public safety but also their interests in maintaining public order and access to public spaces," Sklansky says. "How do they do that in the context of a movement that has many members of the public as well as elected representatives sympathetic to it?"
A national poll published this week by the University of Massachusetts, Lowell, and The Boston Herald suggests that Americans have a better impression of Occupy than of Wall Street. Of the 1,005 adults surveyed, 35 percent had a favorable impression of the Occupy movement, while 16 percent said the same for Wall Street and big business.
Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, who is president of the U.S. Conference of Mayors, has said he supports protesters' right to assemble but that they can't camp outside City Hall indefinitely. He led a recent conference call with seven other mayors to discuss how to handle the Occupy movement and, among other things, the impact on transportation, city services and costs.
Officials in Atlanta said late last month that the Occupy movement could cost the city $300,000. And in New York — where Occupy Wall Street began — police Commissioner Raymond Kelly has put the costs of extra security due to the protests at $2 million.
In Oakland — where protests shut down the city's port last week and police fired tear gas during violent clashes with some demonstrators — Mayor Jean Quan told The San Jose Mercury News that the overtime bill for law enforcement would "bite heavily" into the city's budget.
She put the cost at $700,000 and said the outlay meant that fewer community services would be available.
Tolerance For How Long?
Quan is among several mayors who have expressed both sympathy and concern over the protests. Despite the Oct. 25 police crackdown in Oakland that left several people injured, the mayor has taken pains to declare that her city is "progressive and tolerant of many opinions."
"We support the goals of the Occupy Wall Street movement. We have high levels of unemployment and we have high levels of foreclosure that makes Oakland part of the 99 percent, too," Quan said days after the incident. "We may not always agree, but we all have a right to be heard."
George Edwards, a political science professor at Texas A&M University, says he thinks officials have shown a fair amount of tolerance toward protesters.
"When you had the civil rights movement, one of the things they wanted to do was precipitate violence. Not that they wanted to get their heads bashed in, but that they wanted to show the rest of the country the nature of the opposition," Edwards says. "I don't think, as far as I know, that this is a major goal of the occupiers — to precipitate violence against them. In that case, it's easier to be more tolerant of them."
Perhaps no one exemplifies the difficult situation that officials find themselves in better than New York City's Michael Bloomberg.
On Thursday, Bloomberg seemed conciliatory toward the demonstrators who have stood their ground in Manhattan's Zuccotti Park since mid-September. Speaking with reporters, he conceded that "there is no easy answer ... but the right answer is to allow people to protest."
But the next day, he lashed out at protesters during his weekly radio address.
"What they are trying to do is take away the jobs of people working in the city, take away the tax base that we have," the mayor said. "We're not going to have money to pay our municipal employees or anything else."
The Gamble Of Winter
As cold weather approaches, a whole new set of concerns will arise, said Sklansky, the Berkeley law professor.
The storm that hit the Northeast, including New York, the last weekend in October did little to dissuade demonstrators — and it gave officials a glimpse of the problems that winter might bring. Protesters in Zuccotti Park were using gas-powered generators to stay warm, but fire officials were forced to remove the six generators, along with 13 cans of gasoline, as illegal safety hazards.
Sklansky says city officials can't afford to gamble that freezing temperatures will send the protesters home.
"I don't think that any mayor should just cross his arms and say, 'This will take care of itself,' " he says. "I do think that the weather can sometimes help make the situation less volatile. It's no accident that lots of urban disturbances happen in the summer."
If the Occupy camps don't break up on their own, city officials and protesters will eventually have to come to some sort of an agreement. Otherwise, the situation could devolve into further violence, says Francesca Polletta, a sociology professor at the University of California, Irvine.
Either way, she notes, the loose structure of the Occupy movement could complicate a solution.
"There is no single leader for police and officials to negotiate with," Polletta says.
"On the other hand," she says, "the movement's insistence on people's autonomy makes it harder to keep everyone nonviolent — and if some in the movement destroy property or threaten people's safety, the police will have justification for cracking down even if most in the movement remain nonviolent."
Copyright 2021 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.


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Men's T-shirt "Busted" Bad Girl Graphic Tee / Color Option / MD537
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In Allahabad, northern India, a megacity of millions is sprouting up at the confluence of the Yamuna and Ganges rivers. For millennia, Hindu devotees have flocked to these holy banks to participate in a ritual cleansing known as the Kumbh Mela; this year's Maha Kumbh Mela is a particularly auspicious iteration in cycles of these pilgrimages, which occur four times every 12 years. In 2001, nearly 70 million flocked to the Ganges' shores here.
MORE: The Kumbh Mela: Inside the World's Single Largest Gathering of Humanity


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UFC Store
"The mentality that I take into every fight is that it's do or die –
it's one loss and I'm probably gonna be out of the UFC, so I try to get
in there and win every fight." - Jon Madsen
Jon Madsen didn't arrive in the UFC from the tenth season of The Ultimate Fighter with the notoriety of Kimbo Slice, the experience of Roy Nelson, the power of Brendan Schaub or the athleticism and charisma of Matt Mitrione.
But a little over 15 months after that season's finale card, he's still here, outlasting Kimbo and castmate James McSweeney in the organization as he compiled a 4-0 Octagon record that has lifted his overall pro slate to 7-0.
That's the good news.
The bad news is that while Madsen still remains unbeaten in the sport's premier organization, Nelson is fighting on the UFC 130 main card against former champ Frank Mir, Schaub is coming off back-to-back wins over Gabriel Gonzaga and Mirko Cro Cop in Pay-Per-View bouts, and Mitrione is 4-0 in the UFC and one of the media's favorite personalities.
As for the 31-year old Madsen, he's still looking for his time to shine, but he understands why he isn't exactly a household name yet.
"My first few fights, against (Mostapha) Al Turk, (Justin) Wren, and (Karlos) Vemola were kinda boring fights," he admits. "I got in there and did what it took to win and I really didn't take any risks. I think in this sport the fans want to see you take risks and they want to see you stick your nose in there and get a little bloody."
It's been said that winning isn't everything, it's the only thing, but in the fight game, there can be an asterisk attached to that statement. Winning is important in terms of fighting your way to the title, but when you fight to finish in every minute of every round - like a Chris Lytle – you can gain something more and it's not just job security. It's the respect given that when you're on the card, people will watch whether you win or lose.
As Madsen pointed out, his first three bouts in the Octagon were far from memorable. He pounded out three round decision wins behind his stellar wrestling and ability to impose his will on his foes and keep them where he wanted them. It was not exactly Fight of the Night material, and he heard all the barbs thrown at him by critics and fans. It was almost as if he was only using some of what was ingrained in him as he become a high school wrestling star, a three-time All-American and a Division-II National Champ for South Dakota State University.
"We've always been taught that when you get an opponent down, you don't let up, you break him, you finish him," he said. "You put him away and you make him quit."
Madsen was getting his opponents down, and he was winning the fights, but he was not finishing them. Then came UFC 121 last October against veteran strike Gilbert Yvel and he had no illusions about what was at stake.
"I think if I would have lost that fight, I would have been done," he said. "I don't think there was any doubt in my mind or probably even (UFC President) Dana (White's) or (matchmaker) Joe Silva's. If I would have lost that fight or even won a fight that was really boring, I probably would have been booted."
Well, considering that he is facing Mike Russow this Saturday at UFC Fight Night in Seattle, you know that Madsen's still here, so it's evident what happened in Anaheim. But for those who didn't catch the results, Madsen took control from the opening bell, put Yvel on his back, and finished him with strikes in less than two minutes. In a short career thus far, it was a defining moment.
"I knew I'd eventually get him to the ground, and once I landed a hard elbow I heard him kinda squeak and squeal and I knew the fight was gonna be over soon," said Madsen, who scored his first TKO since June of 2008. "Everything went perfectly, I felt great, and the fight went great too."
Just like that, people started paying attention to Jon Madsen again. That doesn't mean he's slacking off though.
"The mentality that I take into every fight is that it's do or die – it's one loss and I'm probably gonna be out of the UFC, so I try to get in there and win every fight."
Madsen makes that declaration with no trembling in his voice, or any indication that this possibility is wearing him down. He sounds so calm that he could very well be telling you about the weather.
"I don't really look at it as pressure," he explains. "I look at it as a blessing in disguise. My opportunity that I've had with the UFC has been great. I've been able to do some world traveling and do things that I never thought I would have done in my life, so each fight, I go into it like this the only fight I've had and it could be my last fight, and if I lose, I'm done. But I don't add any pressure from that situation. It's kind of a fact and something I just deal with."
And in his defense, he has only had seven fights since beginning to train in MMA in February of 2007, making him a clear work in progress. But he knows he can't use inexperience as a crutch.
"I don't know if the fans or anybody really look at that," he said. "(H.I.T. Squad coach) Marc Fiore told me that I'm learning on the big stage, and not a lot of people get that chance. But I'm thankful for each opportunity, and every fight is such a great learning experience and you get so much better from every fight. I'd like to get a few more under my belt and hopefully it will all come together."
The next test for Madsen, who trains with Greg Nelson in Minnesota, is Russow, another heavyweight unbeaten in the UFC who has flown under the radar. Actually, let's change that to the past tense, since Russow made plenty of noise in the MMA world last May with his come from behind knockout of then-unbeaten Todd Duffee at UFC 114. An injury has kept Russow on the shelf since then, but as he returns, Madsen thinks he can make a statement against the Chicago police officer.
"He's kinda got that mystique right now after his Todd Duffee fight," said Madsen. "Everybody thinks he's hard to finish and get out of there so it just gives me a great opportunity to get in there and go for the finish and show that I can put away a guy that not many people think can get put away right now."
Yet while he has a great opportunity ahead of him, he also has to be aware of Russow's cast-iron chin, one that kept him in the Duffee fight after absorbing copious amounts of punishment before he turned everything around with a single right hand in the third and final round.
"Either he's got a good chin or Duffee hits like a girl," laughs Madsen. "I'm not sure what the situation is, but knowing that he's gonna be in there for 15 minutes, I like that. I know that I can go 15 minutes, I've done it in three of my other fights, so I plan on pushing the pace on him and seeing if he can keep up to my cardio level, and not the other way around."
March 26th is a new day for Jon Madsen. Another finish, and he might be able to stop thinking about pink slips and more about championship gold.
Power Slap


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Infertility in men
(Male Infertility)
Infertility in men – Definition
Infertility is not being able to conceive after a year of regular, unprotected sex. About one-third of infertility is caused by male factors and one-third are caused by female factors. In the remaining cases, the cause is unknown or is due to problems with both partners.
Men are considered infertile if they:
- Produce too few sperm cells
- Produce sperm cells of poor quality
- Have chronic problems with ejaculation
Infertility in men – Causes
Fertility in men is affected by portions of the brain called the pituitary gland and hypothalamus, as well as male reproductive organs such as testes. Problems in any of these areas may decrease fertility.
In about half of the cases, a cause cannot be found. Some factors that can contribute to infertility include:
- Genetics diseases (eg, Klinefelter syndrome, Sertoli-Leydig cell syndrome)
- Exposure to some workplace chemicals or heavy metals (primarily lead and cadmium)
- Tobacco use, marijuana use
- Varicose veins of the testes ( varicocele)
- Abnormal hormone levels
- Infections
- Physical abnormalities
- Cancer
- Medications
- Obesity
- Chronic diseases (eg, sickle cell anemia)
- Excessive physical activity
- Anti-sperm antibodies
Infertility in men – Risk Factors
These factors increase your chance of developing infertility:
- Exposure to toxic chemicals or heavy metals, such as lead
- Liver disease
- Nicotine use, long-term marijuana or cocaine use, steroid use, opiate use, and certain prescription drug use
- Exposure to diethylstilbestrol (DES) in the womb
- Chemotherapy
- Malnutrition
- Overheating of the testicles
- Cystic fibrosis
- Klinefelter syndrome
- Kartagener syndrome
- Diabetes
- Spinal cord injuries
- Multiple sclerosis
- Brain tumors, pituitary tumors
- Radiation treatment
- Past infections, including sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), mumps, prostatitis
- Birth defects of the male reproductive system, including history of undescended testicles
- Obesity, high body mass index
Tell your doctor if you have any of the above risk factors.
Infertility in men – Symptoms
Inability to have a child after one year of trying to conceive.
Infertility in men – Diagnosis
During the first visit, you and your partner will both be evaluated. The doctor will ask about symptoms, medical history, and work history. Your doctor will look for potential exposure to certain chemicals. Your doctor will also look for physical problems that might cause infertility.
The following tests will be done:
- Blood tests — to find out the levels of different hormones that play a role in sperm development, including:
- Testosterone
- Luteinizing hormone
- Follicle stimulating hormone
- Prolactin levels
- Semen analysis — examined for:
- Amount of semen
- Consistency of semen
- Number of sperm
- Movement of sperm
- Shape of sperm
- "Clumping" of sperm
- Presence of substances other than sperm in the semen
- Other tests:
- Ultrasound — a test that uses sound waves to examine structures inside the body; transrectal ultrasound may be done to look for any enlarged vein around the testicles
- X-rays — a test that uses radiation to take a picture of structures inside the body
- Fertilization tests — to determine how well the sperm can penetrate an egg
- Biopsy — removal of a sample of testicular tissue for testing
- Post-coital test — to check if your sperm is compatible with the mucus in your partner's cervix
Infertility in men – Treatment
Treatment depends on what is causing the condition. Treatments can be costly and lengthy. They often are not covered by insurance.
Lifestyle Changes
Lifestyle changes may include:
- Changing the timing of sexual activity
- Avoiding excessive heat (steam rooms, saunas)
- Avoiding tobacco, marijuana, and excessive alcohol use
- Wearing looser fitting shorts and pants
- Maintaining a healthy weight
- Decreasing stress
- Ask you doctor if a daily antioxidant supplement may help.
If you have a hormonal imbalance, your doctor may prescribe medication. Clomiphene citrate (Clomid, Serophene), for example, is an anti-estrogen drug. In combination with vitamin E, it may help increase sperm count and improve sperm movement.
Surgery is done for conditions like varicocele that can affect fertility. Treatment of a varicocele does not always restore fertility.
Surgery may also be done to reverse a vasectomy. This reversal is not always successful.
Assisted Reproductive Technologies (ART)
ART involves using human sperm and eggs or embryos in a lab to help with conception. The eggs and sperm can be from you and your partner or donated. ART methods include:
- Artificial insemination — Semen is collected and processed in a lab. It is then inserted directly into the woman's cervix or uterus.
- In vitro fertilization (IVF) — An egg is removed from the woman's body and mixed with sperm in a lab. The egg and sperm mixture or a 2-3 day old embryo is then placed in the uterus.
- Gamete or zygote intrafallopian transfer (GIFT or ZIFT) — An egg is removed from the woman's body and mixed with sperm in a lab. The egg and sperm mixture or a 2-3 day old embryo is then placed in the fallopian tube.
- Blastocyst intrafallopian transfer — An egg is removed from the woman's body. Sperm is injected with sperm and allowed to develop. It is later implanted into the uterus.
- Intracytoplasmic sperm injection — A single sperm is injected into the egg. The resulting embryo can be implanted into the uterus or frozen for later use.
Infertility in men – Prevention
Infertility cannot always be prevented. But the following steps may help:
- Avoid:
- Use of tobacco, marijuana, opiates, and anabolic steroids
- Exposure to harmful chemicals and heavy metals
- Excessive use of alcohol
- Protect yourself from STDs by using condoms. Minimize the number of sexual partners you have.


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Just keep going.
No feeling is final."
Rainer Maria Rilke
This process, the one of growing up, it's hard. You don't know the right decisions to make - you've never done this before. Trying to create a career, or to even figure out what you want that career to be, meeting new people, becoming a full, interesting and interested person, to fill your life with good things and keep going through the beauty and terror can feel so overwhelming.
It's stopped me in my tracks for a while. The little fears, ones that go something like this: "what if people don't like what I do anymore?" "what if this blog post isn't as good as the last?" "what if they don't like what I have to say?", they started getting to me. I forgot that those feelings weren't final. I dealt with them as I'm apt to do - I ignored them and stopped moving.
I came across the quote above from Rilke the other day; I had read it before, but this time it took my breath away. Let it happen. But keep going.
I wasn't letting it happen, I was pushing it away. I was trying to pretend it didn't exist and also letting those feeling be final. But I realized you have to live these things out, the beauty and the confusion, to change and grow. You have to keep moving. I'm working on that.
Apple Skillet Cake with Rosemary Crumb
Apples and rosemary are often paired together with pork, but they work really well in sweet dishes, too. This cake is so simple and tasty, the earthiness of the rosemary really makes it.
For rosemary crumb:
1/2 cup all purpose flour
1/3 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup light brown sugar
pinch of salt
1/4 cup cold unsalted butter, cut into cubes
2 tablespoons roughly chopped rosemary
1-2 tablespoon water
For Cake:
1 3/4 cup all purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon fine sea salt
1/3 cup salted butter
1 cup light brown sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup whole milk
1 cup apple, diced
Preheat oven to 350. Butter a 9 inch cast iron skillet.
To prepare crumb topping: Combine the flour, sugar, salt, butter and rosemary in the bowl of stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. Combine on low speed, until it becomes the texture of coarse crumbs, add in water and mix until crumb comes together. Set aside.
To prepare cake: In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder and salt. Using a stand mixer with the paddle attachment, cream butter and sugar together, on medium-high speed for 3-5 minutes, until light and fluffy. Add eggs one at a time, scraping down the sides of bowl after each addition. Stir in vanilla. Add in the flour mixture in 3 additions, alternating with the milk. Fold in the apples.
Pour mixture into prepared pan and sprinkle crumb on top.
Bake for 40-45 minutes, until lightly golden and firm to the touch.


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Anonymous Donor Puts $1,100 in Salvation Army Kettle
It's the selfless stories that really fill the heart with holiday spirit - and such is the case in St. Cloud, Minn., where an anonymous donor dropped 11 hundred-dollar bills into a Salvation Army kettle.
WJON reports that Salvation Army volunteer bell ringers discovered a roll of hundreds inside a kettle on Monday.
"There were 11 of them all bundled together so we know one person put them in," said St. Cloud Salvation Army Major Lee Morrison.
Morrison said it was the largest single donation ever received in one of the kettles in the city.
The iconic red kettles and bell ringers collect donations across the globe to assist those in need during the holidays.


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With an Internet connection and the click of a mouse, today's high school student has access to the world of higher education in fingertip reach.
A student can walk the grounds of a college campus a thousand miles away without setting foot in another zip code; get instantly matched with potential sources of scholarship funding without meeting with a counselor; and apply for multiple colleges through one online application without taking a trip to the post office.
But while technology is changing the face of college admissions, not all students are reaping the benefits of this virtual access to resources and information. For disadvantaged students lacking awareness or the digital-connection capabilities, entry into college may become harder to obtain than ever before.
"Our first-generation college students, even if they have computers with high-speed Internet, still struggle through the college-application process because they do not have the same frame of reference and knowledge base when it comes to things like college-search websites," said Darrell Sampson, a guidance counselor with the 182,000-student Fairfax County school district in Virginia.
"If you do not know what it is you are supposed to be looking for, or how the process is supposed to work," he said, "you are probably not going to be accessing the wealth of information available through technology meant to assist you."
Online Growth
Those same challenges to accessing college admissions—such as seeking out digital resources and determining credibility of information—follow students when they enter college, educators say, where digital resources, and the expectation to use them, abound.
In 1998, the Common Application, a standard admissions application accepted at colleges and universities in place of their own, was made available online for the first time.
Today, the application, supported by a nonprofit organization of the same name, is accepted by more than 488 higher education institutions, and similar application sites, like XAP and the Universal College Application, have also emerged, dramatically changing the college-admissions process. The Common Application received 2.78 million applications last year from 663,000 students, as a student can now fill out one form and submit it to many colleges at once.
The National Association for College Admission Counseling, based in Arlington, Va., reports that the proportion of virtual applications increased from 56.5 percent in 2004 to 85 percent in 2011 of all those received at four-year institutions. Given the ease of applying, the applications in total at each institution have also substantially increased, while the acceptance rate has declined, stiffening competition.
Virtual portals also enable students to track the status of their applications.
Cappex: Provides college reviews, admissions games, searchable information on colleges including video, and college and scholarship matching. www.cappex.com
College Board: Provides SAT registration with free sample questions, study guides, and information on local courses; guidance on how to find colleges, pay for them, and plan academic work to make student applications stronger. www.collegeboard.com
College Connection: Helps students find schools based on career goals, courses offered, and location; includes online degrees. www.collegeconnection.com
Common Application: Allows students to fill out a standard application and submit it electronically to as many member institutions (of 488) as desired; includes charts detailing deadlines and additional requirements of each member school. www.commonapp.org
Naviance: Helps students, their families, and their school counselors organize the admissions process through goal-setting and application management; also provides long-range-planning advice for students' careers based on self-designed profiles and assessments. www.naviance.com
Princeton Review: Offers SAT, ACT, and PSAT preparation guidelines including free practice tests and free events, along with registration for paid courses; includes other college-search advice and general guidance. www.princetonreview.com
Zinch: Students create a profile and are matched with colleges, graduate schools, and scholarship money; students can connect with other students going through the admissions process for advice. www.zinch.com
SOURCE: Education Week
But the application is not the only facet of college admissions that has become virtual. Students can now use a whole host of websites, such as Naviance, Cappex, Zinch, and College Confidential to search for and get matched with potential schools, receive step-by-step guidance on admissions, take virtual tours, and practice for the SAT and the ACT.
Bob Patterson, the director of college outreach at Zinch, a website where students create a profile to get matched with colleges and scholarship money, says such sites help reach students through familiar, digital communication tools. That reduces stress in the admissions process, he said, particularly in high schools where the student-to-counselor ratio is very high.
According to NACAC, the national average is 421-to-1.
"The idea of instant feedback, online searches, and connecting with students in real time is the way higher education institutions will need to engage with the student of the future," said Mr. Patterson, who worked as an admissions counselor for 15 years at Stanford University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, among other universities, before going to Zinch.
It also can save institutions time, money, and other resources by interacting with students virtually, he added.
Games and Resources
The abundance of virtual information available on colleges, however, may overload many high school students as they struggle to process and track the myriad of resources on top of their high school responsibilities, some high school counselors say. That can be worrisome, given that students could miss out on the email and other social-media messages from colleges, which monitor students' responsiveness as a gauge of interest.
Those challenges can be even greater for disadvantaged or first-generation college-bound students who lack the resources some of their peers have.
A study released last year by the College Board found that while low- and high-income students alike had similar college aspirations, low-income students were more likely to be stressed by the admissions process and to say they were influenced by outside information and other people when making their college decisions.
Given those inclinations, some of the new digital admissions resources target disadvantaged students, who could likely benefit from their help.
A new virtual Facebook game targeting students at Title I schools, Mission Admission, for example, has students guide an avatar through the admissions process, learning key guidelines and strategies along the way. The goal of the game is to have low-income students build confidence through play that will help them apply and get into college, said Zoe Corwin, an assistant professor at the University of Southern California's Pullias Center for Higher Education in Los Angeles, which helped create the game.
"The websites out there tend to be text-heavy, and users are often passive. … Students think they are being productive researching, and they are actually becoming more confused about taking the appropriate steps," said Ms. Corwin.
Other resources, though, while aimed at low-income students, have not always had the impact desired.
One college-assistance website, WeGotIn.net, shares successful applications to Ivy League institutions with its subscribers, both those who pay and those who get free access because of financial need. According to the site, the goal was to help low-income students by "shed[ing] light" on what was considered a high-quality application. But it found the bulk of its users tended to be students who already had considerable access to resources, with paying users exceeding requests for free access by more than 100-to-1.
Low-income and first-generation college students often face additional barriers, such as attending schools with understaffed guidance departments or having parents with little knowledge of admissions, that their higher-income peers do not face, said Nina Marks, a founder and the chief executive officer of Marks Education, a private college-counseling service based in Bethesda, Md. Between the lack of admissions savvy and exposure to the abundance of new digital resources, students can be overwhelmed navigating applications, she said.
Ms. Marks, whose services cost around $700 an hour, also started a nonprofit, Collegiate Directions, which provides free counseling services for selected first generation, low-income public school students from the junior year through the time they finish higher education.
One of Collegiate Directions' scholars, Ana Gabriela Coello, now a senior at the University of Maryland College Park, said she would have been "lost" without the supplementary guidance from the organization, which helped her through the admission steps, deadlines, and digital resources, especially while she lacked a computer at home—her situation during part of the process.
According to Ms. Coello, the challenges only increased, however, once she entered college, where she encountered those same hurdles daily, but didn't have the support system she had in secondary school.
Virtual Skills
Her sentiments echo the concerns of education leaders, who see the admissions challenge as part of a bigger problem: that of integrating digital-literacy instruction into schools, particularly high schools, with diverse student populations.
According to Mr. Sampson, the Fairfax County counselor, while many high school students have smartphones, lower-income students who lack home access to high-speed Internet and computers struggle not just with the admissions process, but also in doing their homework, such as research for papers.
Not learning those skills in high school can set students back in accessing college opportunities and surviving once they arrive on campus, many say.
Recognition of those differences in digital skills and exposure has some schools, organizations, and colleges trying to improve high school students' college pathways by improving their digital-literacy skills to help them in the admissions process and beyond. Alabama, Florida, and West Virginia are among the states that require students to complete online coursework to graduate from high school. Colleges are addressing digital-skill deficits by integrating technology remediation into their courses. And some school districts are working directly with higher education and other partners to improve the quality of digital instruction they provide.
The Federation for a Competitive Economy initiative in California, for example, works with two high-poverty, high-minority districts—the 42,000-student Riverside and the 52,000-student San Bernardino systems—in partnership with the University of California, Riverside, and local leaders to improve coursework requirements, provide supports outside school, and offer professional development to teachers, as part of a digital-literacy project to improve college and career options for needy students.
"To build a pathway for creating the most successful students, all educators should be communicating about expected competencies as students transition from kindergarten to college," said Pam Clute, the executive director of the federation and a mathematics professor at UC-Riverside. "We have to think about this as a K-20 strategy."


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