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Monday, April 14, 2014
The New World Order Agenda
The bloodline elite's agenda, their "Great Work," which is nothing short of world domination, has exoterically been called "The New World Order" by many politicians and Masonic authors. The Old World Order was characterized by monarchies, countries with independent standing armies, metals and fiat currency. The New World Order will be characterized by One-World government, open borders, a world army, world court, and a world cashless credit-based currency managed via microchips.
"The Illuminati can be traced back thousands of years to Sumer, Babylon, Egypt and still further into what we call pre-history. Through the centuries they have been working constantly to centralize global power and complete their 'Great Work' global dictatorship. Behind the apparent randomness of world events has been the Illuminati secret network that is privy to knowledge the rest of the people never hear about. The network is controlled by ancient interbreeding bloodlines and their offshoots headed today by some thirteen 'elite families', which are structured in a DNA hierarchy. These include the Rothschilds, Rockefellers, House of Lorraine, Habsburgs and the Thurn und Taxis dynasty from Bergamo." -David Icke, "Tales from the Time Loop"
"The New World Order is not a 'conspiracy' in the strictest sense of the term - it is an agenda. The agenda is orchestrated by a power elite that thinks it has the divine right to commandeer total control of your life. But who are 'they'? Who are the 'power elite'? The UN, the EU, the Council on Foreign Relations, the Bilderberg Group, the Trilateral Commission, the Rockefellers, the Rothschilds, the Royal Institute of International Affairs, the Club of Rome. The list goes on and there have been many books written that cover the history of these groups and how they connect to each other … The agenda is a worldwide consolidation and centralization of power into the hands of an all-encompassing World Government. This system will evolve from the European Union, (already in place) the American Union, (derived from NAFTA) and the Asian Union. When these three models are in existence, they will be merged together to create the One World Government." -Paul Joseph Watson, Order Out of Chaos (8-9)
"I would emphasize that I am exposing an Agenda, not a conspiracy as such. The conspiracy comes in manipulating people and events to ensure the Agenda is introduced. These conspiracies take three main forms: conspiring to remove people and organizations that are a threat to the Agenda (the assassination of Diana, Princess of Wales); conspiring to put people into positions of power who will make the Agenda happen (George Bush, Henry Kissinger, Tony Blair, etc.); and conspiring to create events which will make the public demand the Agenda is introduced through problem-reaction-solution (wars, terrorist bombs, economic collapses). In this way all these apparently unconnected events and manipulations become aspects of the same conspiracy to introduce the same Agenda." -David Icke, "The Biggest Secret" (13)
When confronted with a conspiracy of this magnitude, many say it is impossible because someone would have spilled the beans. If there was a huge global conspiracy for world government, someone would come out and say something. The fact is that Congressmen, Senators, secret society members, and Illuminists themselves have publicly stated and written entire books about what they are doing! When asked how the American people would respond to the inconsistencies of the JFK assassination/Warren Commission report, CIA director Allen Dulles simply said, "The American people don't read." The conspirators know the general public doesn't read and the books they write don't attract popular readership.
"The past record of man is burdened with accounts of assassinations, secret combines, palace plots and betrayals in war. But in spite of this clear record, an amazing number of people have begun to scoff at the possibility of conspiracy at work today. They dismiss such an idea merely as a Conspiratorial View." -Political Commentator G. Edward Griffin
"The individual is handicapped by coming face to face with a conspiracy so monstrous he cannot believe it exists." -FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover
"Fifty men have run America and that's a high figure." - US Ambassador Joseph P. Kennedy
There exists a semi-secret cabal of globalists bent on one world government under the United Nations, world military through expansion of NATO, World Bank/cashless currency and a micro-chipped population. The conspirators are a group of bankers, businessmen, politicians, media owners/personalities, Illuminati families, and secret society elites. They implement their power through the vehicles of Free Masonry, the Bilderberg Group, Bohemian Grove, Skull and Bones, the Council on Foreign Relations, the Trilateral Commission, and the Committee of 300 to name just a few. Their agenda for world governance has been known to secret society elites and Illuminati families for centuries as "The Great Work," though nowadays it is politically referred to as "The New World Order."
"The Illuminati structure can be symbolized as a web or as a pyramid in which the few at the top dictate to the many at the bottom. The many are kept in ignorance of what is really going on. The pyramid structure of secret societies is mirrored in government, banking, business and every other organization and institution … Only the few at the top of the pyramids know the real agenda and what the organization is trying to achieve. The further you go down the pyramid the more people are working for the organization but the less they know about its real agenda. They are only aware of the individual job they do every day. They don't know how their contribution (apparently innocent in isolation) connects with those of other employees in other areas of the company government or whatever. They are 'compartmentalized' and the only people who know how it all fits together are the very few sitting at the top - the bloodline families and their lackeys. The smaller pyramids, like the local branch of a bank, fit into bigger and bigger pyramids, until eventually you have the pyramid that encompasses all of the banks. It is the same with the transnational corporations, political parties, secret societies, media empires and the military. If you go high enough in this structure all the translational corporations (like the oil cartel), major political parties, secret societies, media empires and the military (via NATO, for instance), are controlled by the same families who sit atop the biggest pyramids. In the end there is a global pyramid that includes all the others … At the capstone of this you will find the most elite of the Illuminati, the 'purest' of their bloodlines. In this way, they can coordinate through apparently unconnected, even 'opposing' areas of society, the same policies. All roads lead eventually to them." -David Icke, Tales from the Time Loop
The New World Order is already nearly complete with the United Nations increasingly assuming the role of world government; the world court already exists in the Netherlands; NATO is in place to expand into the world army; World Bank/IMF are centralizing banking; and Union currencies like the Euro and the coming Amero are consolidating world currency. The European Union has centralized Europe, The North American Union (SPP) is now underway, and so is the Asian Union (APEC). The end result and stated mission is global government under the unelected communist-based United Nations. They want to have one all-powerful world King/President with a world army at his disposal. They want a top-down system of global governance that dictates world law from a centralized body and complete interdependence of all nations, economically, politically, and militarily.
"The New World Order system of world conquest has always been visible, but it is so hulking and massive that it has remained hidden in plain sight. One of the most common pre-conditioned responses I hear from the average compartmentalized individual is that there couldn't be a society of people working for world government. Those in denial proclaim, 'It's too big… it would unravel… they couldn't keep it hidden…' The average person judges the world according to their moral compass. Because most individuals are not ruthless, sociopathic control-freaks, they cannot even begin to fathom the dark gulfs that are the souls of the servants of the global elite. The New World Order is a synthesis of the survivors of empires, of super-merchant families, of barbarian kings, of banking families established in the middle-ages, and of the royal families of Europe. Over time, they have learned that if they can simply conceal the true magnitude of their power and install puppet rulers from the cultures they dominate, the people will accept greater forms of tyranny. In the late 20th Century, as the formation of a true world government entered its final stages, the globalists began to do what was unthinkable just a few years before. They began to admit that there really was a move towards a New World Order, complete with a World Court, World Taxes and a World Army to enforce its despotic laws. Just a few years ago, the average man on the street refused to even admit the possibility of a world government. Now that same individual will bellow, 'Yes, there's a world government – and we need it to protect ourselves from terrorism!' The globalists' plan is so far along that now they must admit that world government is a reality. Their propagandists are hailing the New World Order as the only system that will keep us safe and secure. In reality, it is the world government itself which is conducting the terrorist acts." -Alex Jones, 911 Decent into Tyranny
For decades now politicians, the corporate controlled media, and public schools have been promoting this One-World agenda as being an inevitable, advantageous step-forward for humanity. They say a world government, world army, and currency will unite us as a global community putting an end to all wars and poverty. This is simply not true. There have been more wars fought in the 60+ years since the 1945 forming of the United Nations than in the rest of recorded history before the UN - over 140 wars. This means the United Nations has failed its single reason for existence – to end all wars.
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32 comments:
This is no doubt a stupid question in your eyes, but what's so bad about a World Government? Why would it be any worse than it currently is - the article just seems to make the assumption that I would know why a One World Government would be so bad. Maybe there is going to be a World Government, maybe there isn't but why is that necessarily worse?
- November 24, 2009 at 6:25 AM
- Eric Dubay said...
Look how little a voice you have in your already big national government, and think of how little a voice you would have in a world government.
Why should politicians living in Indonesia be governing Americans? Why should some random politician who you didn't elect, living half-way around the world, have more of a say in your local governance than you? The smaller and more localized your government, the more voice/power you have in it. The bigger and more global your government, the less voice/power you have in it.
If there's a world government what is to stop some dictator from taking control? World domination is the oldest desire in the history of man... there are plenty of smiling vipers that would abuse this absolute power.
"Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely." -Lord Acton
Even if Ghandi was head of the world government, how could any one person decide what is "just" and "fair" for everyone on the planet? Maybe World President Ghandi says, "we will have equality for all animals, so killing animals for their meat is now against the law,and everyone must be vegetarian." What if you want to eat meat? Who is Ghandi to tell you otherwise?
"It takes more than one person to decide what's fair." -Modest Mouse - November 25, 2009 at 4:44 AM
Eric...there were no commercial plane crashes on 9-11. After 9 years not one single piece of debris from ANY of the 4 planes from ANY of the 4 locations from 9-11 has ever been physically verified in any way by anyone. Over SIX MILLION time stamped parts from all 4 planes DISAPPEARED on 9-11. Not one piece has ever been found.
9-11 is the catalyst to bring the NWO into our textbooks? Though 99.999% still "believe" there were commercial plane crashes on 9-11 so I doubt the NWO will be harmed in any way any time soon. - December 22, 2009 at 9:01 AM
- Eric Dubay said...
I'm not condoning meat-eating by the way, in fact I gave that example because it's the most "utopian" law I could imagine, since any "enlightened" or "golden age" society would certainly not slaughter animals for meat.
But even with such a "compassionate" law, how would it be enforced? What would police do to meat-eaters? Lock them up? Pay a fine? The punishment and loss of freedom would out-weigh the idealistic benefits of even the most well-meaning laws.
So that's why world government will never and could never be beneficial for humanity. As I've said before, all governments use violence (police/militaries) and coercion (forced taxation) thus they are immoral and criminal institutions. And the larger they are, the worse off people are under their control.
As for 9/11 if anyone still hasn't figured out this NWO ploy, check out some of these videos and articles:
AC 9/11 Posts - October 13, 2011 at 4:06 AM
- Druv said...
I was just reading Maurice Joly's Dialogues on the Protocol of Zion:
They are specifically talking about the million hands of Vishnu checking to see the varying opinions of the masses and control them.
"Each of our hundred hands will hold one spring of the social machinery of State."
Odd don't you think that these protocols talk about God Vishnu?
Published in Russia in 1903 and spread in USA in 1920.
This was the same time period when India was under the slimy hands of British East India company of German Jew Rothschild who created the Nazi - Anti -Semitic barrier using "Swastika" and the name "Aryans" when people of India are called the Aryans because India's old name is Aryavrata. - October 13, 2011 at 4:49 AM
- Druv said...
Interesting, 9 years after it was published in America -- the great depression hit and it hit India as well.
May be this was the first attempt to test out the theories of building economies they tested the first time Globally? - October 13, 2011 at 5:38 AM
- Druv said...
The pro-Zionist Indian national Congress which was Set up by the Zionist themselves won all the votes across India.
not only it was a Economic propaganda but also political as well.
They used the Sutras and Celtic Knot to take over the world -- it will be the same web that will burn them apart :) - October 13, 2011 at 5:40 AM
- Druv said...
This would also lead to the conclusion that all the "freedom" fighters were just puppets to create a show -- to keep people entertained -- till they laid down their global web of puppetry.
Indira Gandhi, "Pundit" Jawahar lal Nehru - Another Islamic pretender, Rajiv Gandhi ( his father Firoz Gandhi -- Firoz is a muslim name who has no blood relationship to Gandhi)
This so called Modern world was built on an absolute lie, and we know who the core of evil is -- Its Time to pay the piper. - October 13, 2011 at 9:59 PM
Druv - all this hostility and reaction is extremely misguided.
While the things you say may be true - and that the,"elites" are allegedly evil - yet the call for revenge to, "pay the pied piper" is just as paranoid.
Sure they have placed Masons and whatnot in every position of power out there, but even they must follow instructions from a master that many of them don't even know about because none of them know about it.
Calm down, and watch the fake show unfold. - October 13, 2011 at 11:00 PM
- Anonymous said...
erick thanx for bravely posting this excellent teaching !!!
sadly druv is RIGHT !!
anonymous ...it is because of comments like yours that this world is in this mess we are in ....
"The world is a dangerous place to live ,not because of the people who are evil....but because of the people who DON'T do anything about it" -Albert Einstein-
jesus and paul are both new world order "agents" .... jesus said to love your neighbour or enemy as yourself ...then he says ... mine enemies the ones who dont agree with me ...bring them and slay them before me !!!! wow so fucking much for "his love" .... oh and i did NOT bring peace he said "i bring the sword" .....divide and rule !!! does this sound familiar ...jesus says he brings division ... father against son ...brother against brother ...mother against daughter-in law !!!! this is typical break up the family-bonds which actually glues us together ...divide and RULE .....NEW WORLD ORDER HAS BEEN KICKED OFF MILLENIA AGO ...eric is right so to excellent comments by druv !!!!
south africa - October 15, 2011 at 6:02 AM
Nice Modest mouse quote Eric, They are one of my favorite bands!
There is a concern bout your research tho..
You have mentioned controlled opposition before. And you are quoting David Icke and Alex Jones, whom I thought you claimed were both people placed directly to confuse people, but you still post their shit in most of your work. This is very confusing for my brain and I need clarification dude.
I luff you all - October 15, 2011 at 9:52 AM
Look at David Icke & Alex Jones as stepping stones--you read thru their stuff, then you research key subjects, then you discern what you think are plausible.
Since the elite have kept their shtuff hidden from the rest of us, and then these folks are one of the first to reveal these crazy evil agendas, look at it as they are opening the doors for you, but to go on the journey, YOU will have to research for what you feel are the truths YOURSELF.
After you read about their crazy stunts, then you keep your eyes open to see if these crazy stunts are happening around you--THEN you will know how to sift thru the "theory" stuff.
So happens David Icke & Alex Jones throws out the bread crumbs.
Such methods (of controlled opposition) will only serve to bring down the elite. Such is the ill fate of control freaks. They are so paranoid you will find out anyways, so they have to make public some truths, which only serves to peak people's curiosity, then they have to keep covering their tracks by, ironically, exposing more truths a little at a time--until it spins momentously out of control against them.
That's the ying and yang of it! - October 15, 2011 at 7:10 PM
- Eric Dubay said...
Great explanation Anon. This article is taken from The Atlantean Conspiracy book and back when I wrote it I still thought Alex Jones and David Icke were genuine, independent researchers. Now that I've learned more about how this "conspiracy theory world" is run, I know they are controlled opposition, but 90% of their information is still spot-on with about 10% misinformation thrown in to steer you off course. Thanks for the comments everyone. Peace
- October 15, 2011 at 8:12 PM
Hi, Eric.
I really appreciate your blog, especially the recent raw food info (Been watching all Dr. Morse's vids on Youtube). I also like the numerology articles.. It makes me think God uses math to create the universe!
As for the Illuminati, I read all of David Ickes books and used to keep up with Alex Jones and every other conspiracy theorist. It got me curious about these "devil worshipping", "child sacrificing" occultist.
However, once I started researching the "Illuminati" and the occult further I easily discovered that the "Great Work" is supposed to be an internal union with your higher-self (holy guardian angel) and with God not world domination.
And it seems nobody worships the devil, not even witches or practitioners of magick. Theoretically people can use magick or witchcraft to hurt others (black magick), but this will supposedly wreak havoc on your "karma" and your immediate life circumstances..
Yes, there are some greedy and power-seeking people in the world. And naturally they seek to become more and more organized to further their agendas. I'm just not so sure about all the weird demon-possessed, 4th dimension alien, devil stuff.
Keep the articles coming! - October 15, 2011 at 8:52 PM
- Druv said...
While the things you say may be true - and that the,"elites" are allegedly evil - yet the call for revenge to, "pay the pied piper" is just as paranoid.
Retarded opinions with no backbone are irrelevant. - October 17, 2011 at 11:04 AM
- Eric Dubay said...
Thanks David, I try to keep up with Dr. Morse's latest videos as well since he is such an amazing resource for health/medical knowledge. You're right about numerology and creation, sacred geometry, Pi, the Fibonacci sequence, the Phi ratio, and the golden spiral are all among the fractal building-blocks of nature. You're also right about the "Great Work" ... it was originally an alchemical term referring to the transmutation of Iron base metal/consciousness, to Gold highest metal/consciousness. These "satanists" and secret society types who have co-opted virtually every esoteric system/teaching in existence, have manifested an anti-Great Work in their NWO. The devil, the archetype whom they "worship" just means their own base selfishness taking precedence over all else.
- October 18, 2011 at 12:28 AM
@ Druv -
You only need to look at a mirror of yourself to find the "backbone" of what I mean. I think you may be surprised by what you see, and more so by what you are trying to deny from seeing within yourself. - October 19, 2011 at 9:43 AM
Thanks for your reply Eric. Do you know of any books that actually promote this kind of materialism over spirituality/satanism as a way of life? None of my research has turned up anything like that yet so I'd be interested to see it firsthand.
Thanks again,
David - October 21, 2011 at 12:03 PM
- Eric Dubay said...
Anton Levay, Marilyn Manson and others have talked about what Satanism means and stated that it's self over others, personal empowerment, materialism. The Pentagram represents man and the five elements, ether (spirituality) being at the top. The satanic upside-down Pentagram however, represents the material elements over ether (spirituality) at the bottom. Check out Aliester Crowley's books for more info. Peace
- October 21, 2011 at 4:50 PM
- mastermode said...
that screenshot of the book page open...chapter 33...not really surprised..
- November 7, 2011 at 3:57 AM
Hi, Eric.
Been researching Aleister Crowley along with satanism as you suggested. Here's some of the material I've found:
'I did not hate God or Jesus, I simply hated the the Jesus and God of the people I hated'~ Aleister Crowley
Thelema vs Satanism (Some Blog Post)
"Well, Crowley created Thelema based on communications he received through automatic writing from a being called Aiwass. Anton LaVey is considered the father of LaVeyan* Satanism, having based it on his beliefs as far as I know?
The main tenets of Thelema include "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law" and "Every man and every woman is a star". This is the idea that one's will is the natural way of the higher self (as opposed to momentary whims), and that following this natural way will allow everyone to do as they will while not impeding everyone else's ability to do the same. Crowley believes that "the wise application based on observation and experience of the Law of Thelema is to work in conscious harmony with Evolution". Further, "Love is the law, love under will" - by following one's will truly, and not impeding the will of others, we are creating and maintaining love.
LaVeyan Satanism is based on indulgence, wisdom, rational self interest, and a perseverence toward success and human potential. It is against stupidity, self-deceit, herd conformity, etc. Finally, it advocates vengeance against those who deserve it, punishing sins such as stupidity and herd conformity, and destroying those who bother you.
Thelema, therefore, is very much focused on the evolution of the self and of the whole, along with love. Satanism, in contrast, is focused on evolution of the self, without regard to the whole, and needn't require love (although love is not forbidden either). The Thelemite follows their higher self's will while aiding others in doing the same - the Satanist indulges in whims and sins even if it requires on stepping on other people."
"The Devil does not exist. It is a false name invented by the Black Brothers to imply a Unity in their ignorant muddle of dispersions. A devil who had unity would be a God.~ Aleister Crowley
David - November 7, 2011 at 6:19 PM
- Eric Dubay said...
You've been busy :) Thanks for sharing what you've found. Peace
- November 7, 2011 at 6:39 PM
Very interesting.
knowledge is power.
checkout www.dvdtruth.com - November 29, 2011 at 1:38 PM
The Illuminati's network encompasses a broader and more diverse group of people than the people you have mentioned and the people that make up the real Illuminati go by different names and titles (that is why many people do not associate them with the Illuminati) and they live and operate openly in our midst.
Read more: http://endtimedelusions.blogspot.com - April 15, 2014 at 9:56 AM
- SpiritCalls.us said...
A great article and great comments.
If a person, or group, is not in touch with their Spirituality, AKA the higher Self~Soul~Spirit of Truth~UNconditional Love~Soul~GOD (not God nor gods)~Christ Spirit~Holy Spirit etc etc ... then they are most likely living an egoic life of Dualisms (+/-)... polarized judgmentalism of the extremes of "right" and "wrong" ...
It is that kind of thinking that sees the concept of "the sword dividing family members" as involving force ...
True Spirituality is NOT Dualistic (+/-), it is Trinity (+=-) where the Spirit is the common INterconnection, the (=) that attempts to bring differences together for common cause ... the result being Synergy of win/win ...
The Dualistic trend, too normal in this world of Fear, is all about conflict ... and is used by "them" to Divide us for Control ...
The relatively "evil" of those at the top of the pyramid (apex) are the ones who practise the "need to know" principle of keeping those "below" themselves ignorant of the intentions ...
The same, yet "opposite", Pyramid of GOD is transparent, no secrets, no lying, completely benevolent, intended to prosper the whole as being the greater good.
The Jewish symbol of the Star of David is a good example of "As above so below", two Pyramids intersecting each other, that of GOD and that of Man ... BUT ...
but the one of Man has the "broken base line" where a "division" (/) has been placed between the "two sides", both sides of which are controlled by a "hidden" elite of "that apex", turning us against each other where the elite pull the strings of all "leaders" to effect their hidden aims for power and control.
(+/-)<(+=-) IMnsHO and E. - April 16, 2014 at 11:23 AM
- Unknown said...
hello Eric ,
Icke calls it a agenda . Don't you find this man dubious..using rhetoric to suppress the facts..subjugation of people through their propaganda machinery cannot be justified . - April 17, 2014 at 10:26 AM
- fb said...
Please everyone you are all off the beaten track here when it comes to this new world order.I don't know where or who you are getting your info from but it is not the elites or illuminati even though the conspiracy encompass it,it is and always is a jewish conspiracy.I'm not going to ramble about why but any proper research will only come to one conclusion.Connect the dots and why is it that every person in charge of some important position in finance,education,medical,political and activist or any group is jewish,coincidence?Any one to deny the jewish conspiracy is a shill no if and buts.The reason it is scary is what they will do too us, the Russian revolution is a good example of how these people think and act.Some try to blame that its the zionist but they all have read the talmud so they all under stand the meaning and they will always defend the right to Palestine.Ignorance is not and excuse.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything-Mark Twain
History would be something extraordinary if only it was true-Leo Tolstoy
It is difficult to free fools from the chains they revere-Volitair
There is no shame in not knowing.The problem arises when emotional thought and attendant behaviour fill the vacuum left by ignorance-Neil De Grass Tyson
The truth sounds insane when you tell what the insane are doing? - April 25, 2014 at 4:21 AM
- Eric Dubay said...
Hey FB, thanks for the message, you're absolutely right, and for anyone new to the fact, check out my article:
The Zionist Jew World Order - April 25, 2014 at 9:48 AM
Hi Eric,
I wonder why you are recycling your own old, out-dated articles, originally pupblised years ago? Such as this one? And then just add the new one with updated, better info as a reply message? It just confuses people which is not good conerning your credibility...Peace.. - April 25, 2014 at 4:46 PM
- Eric Dubay said...
Hey, how does reposting articles confuse people or damage my credibility? I always update them, add pictures, etc., and I get new readers all the time, so many people have never seen certain articles. I also just don't have time to write new articles every week. I teach Wing Chun and Yoga 7 days a week and I'm writing two new books at the moment, please bare with me if I repost old articles. Peace
- April 25, 2014 at 11:05 PM
- Unknown said...
Hello Eric!
Love your work and think you are one of the most insightful people I've ever known. What's the best way to contact you?
Cheers, Anthony.
- August 11, 2015 at 11:13 PM
UN Agenda 21/2030, The Great Reset, EVENT 201, COVID-19: There's more to this conspiracy than meets the eye. There is a big picture. Let's not get lost in the details. The big boys have a plan--a 500 year plan: 1776+500=2276CE. This the calendar year for the inauguration of their New World Order. And the midpoint of their plan is just 5 years away in 2026, the year the USA celebrates 250 years of sovereignty. (Will they reach their goals?). My book, 2276CE: The Future is Calling (2020) outlines The Plan--and discloses the very calendar date for that inauguration. That is, The Plan will abrogate the future of the whole world! We are simply living in the midst of its unfolding.
- December 30, 2021 at 2:44 PM


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The Benefit of City Farms
posted by Ham at 00:02 -- Comments here: 1
A London photo every day. Some pictures will be there for their own sake, some because they are places you may like to see, all because they are part of what makes London what it is. Requests welcome!
Raising funds for Breast Cancer Care

subset: commoncrawl


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5 Father's Day Gift Ideas For the Carnivorous Dad
It's just days away, and if you're like us, you're stumped about what to get your pops for Father's Day.
Ugly polo shirts wrinkle and fade, and no dad has ever actually cracked the spine on a book called 101 Great Grill Recipes. So what do all dudes love? Meat.
We scoured the internet to find our favorite 5 meat-inspired Father's Day gifts.
The Ultimate Meat Basket
There aren't many other gifts that you can put in a basket without making them seem girly, but meat is the ultimate man food.
You could wrap a porterhouse in lace without lowering it's manliness. The butchers at Bistro Le Marais in Manhattan know that, and they're offering a special Father's Day basket of homemade beef jerky, authentic brined and smoked veal belly bacon, and beef short ribs that will have dad belching loudly for days. Plus, it might just be the only awesome thing you can buy in Manhattan for $55.
A Bacon Dozen
Rocket Donuts in Bellingham, WA is known for their weird donut combinations, and one of the biggest crowd favorites is the Bacon Maple Bar -- a cruller-shaped doughnut topped with real, hickory-smoked bacon.
Though in the past the deliciousness used to be reserved for Washington residents, Rocket Donuts got smart and began shipping their delicious meat sweets, so you can order dad a dozen (or six) bacon-flavored cop killers for his special day. We definitely recommend ordering some for yourself, too.
Meat Art
Everyone loves a good mystery, which explains why everyone loves hot dogs. Alyson Thomas's Etsy shop Drywell is full of assorted meat art but this mystery hot dog butcher chart print is definitely our favorite.
Each 8.5 x 11 print of original ink and watercolor illustration. It comes on archival velvet fine art stock paper, and is printed with archival ink, so the hot dogs last forever. Exactly like they do in your stomach.
Exotic Mailbox Meat
Got an adventurous meat-eating dad? Buy him a membership to the Exotic Meat of the Month Club and he'll get to chow down on a different weird animal every month, including kangaroo, antelope, alligator, llama and turtle.
If you're curious, turtle meat comes ground for soup and boneless for...other things?
Bacon Koozie
If your dad has more than one life expectancy-limiting vice, it can sometimes be hard to choose which to celebrate on Father's Day. If your pops loves booze and also fatty foods, now he can celebrate both at the same time with a Bacon Koozie.
Bonus points if you bring him a bacon koozie'd beer with his Father's Day breakfast but we're not gonna blow up your spot if you sleep in.


text: Imagine you are at the edge of the sea on a day when it is difficult to say where the land ends and the sea begins and where the sea ends and the sky begins. Sea kayaking lets you explore these and your own boundaries and broadens your horizons. Sea kayaking is the new mountaineering.


text:
miaowang123: handled the decision well.
handled the decision well.
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Gabbert completed 13 of 16 passes for 165 yards and a touchdown in three series -- arguably his best showing in three years. He banged his hand on a defenders helmet during his final throw. Gabbert wont need surgery, but he will wear a protective brace while the bone heals. The Jaguars believe he should be able to return to practice in two weeks and be ready for the Sept. 8 opener against Kansas City. "Normally a break would require surgery or six to eight weeks," Bradley said. "Its not the same with this injury. They feel like in two weeks he should have a chance to come back and begin his prep for Kansas City." The Jaguars insisted all off-season that Gabbert and Chad Henne were competing for the starting job. But many outsiders believe the scenario was created to put extra pressure and strain on Gabbert, and see how he would respond. Although Gabbert struggled at times in practice and did little in the preseason opener, his performance Saturday night was enough to convince Jacksonvilles coaching staff that hes the guy. Bradley doesnt anticipate a quick change, either. "The reason why we took this length of time is so that we would have some conviction and to stay strong," said Bradley, who was part of Seattles staff that stuck with rookie Russell Wilson last season. "Russell, as the quarterback in the first couple of games, had to go through some learning and some growing, and that conviction was in place. I think it was really good for me to see how that entire process took place and thee conviction and the support you need. Adam Humphries Jersey. " Gabbert, the 10th overall pick in the 2011 draft, is coming off consecutive seasons in which Jacksonville had significant issues around him. He had no off-season as a rookie because of the NFL lockout, was thrown into the starting lineup in Week 3 and played with one of the worst receiving corps in the league. He was expected to show improvement last year, but he played behind a patchwork offensive line and with two young receivers in Cecil Shorts III and Justin Blackmon. Jacksonville also lost star running back Maurice Jones-Drew to a season-ending foot injury in October. Maybe the biggest difference this year is offensive co-ordinator Jedd Fischs scheme. Having worked in a spread offence in college, Gabbert seems more comfortable in Fischs system, which focuses on reading defences before the snap and making quick decisions and throws. "Its very quarterback-friendly and it puts a lot of responsibility on our shoulders because we do so much stuff at the line of scrimmage," Gabbert said. "It makes it fun for the quarterback to know that you have the ability to do some things." 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text:
Woman charged with hate murder in NY subway shove death
Erika Menendez was charged in the death of Sunando Sen, an immigrant from India who was crushed by a No. 7 train in Queens on Thursday night, the second time this month a commuter has died in such a nightmarish fashion.
Menendez, 31, was awaiting arraignment on the charge Saturday evening, Queens District Attorney Richard A. Brown said. She could face 25 years to life in prison if convicted. She was in custody and couldn't be reached for comment, and it was unclear if she had an attorney.
Menendez, who was arrested after a tip by a passer-by who saw her on a street and thought she looked like the woman in a surveillance video released by police, admitted shoving Sen, who was pushed from behind, authorities said.
"I pushed a Muslim off the train tracks because I hate Hindus and Muslims ever since 2001 when they put down the twin towers I've been beating them up," Menendez told police, according to the district attorney's office.
Sen was from India, but it's unclear if he was Muslim or Hindu. The 46-year-old lived in Queens and ran a printing shop. He was shoved from an elevated platform on the 7 train line, which connects Manhattan and Queens. Witnesses said a muttering woman rose from her seat on a platform bench and pushed him on the tracks as a train entered the station and then ran off.
The two had never met before, authorities said, and witnesses told police they hadn't interacted on the platform.
Police released a sketch and security camera video showing a woman running from the station where Sen was killed.
Menendez was arrested by police earlier Saturday after a passer-by on a Brooklyn street spotted her and called police. Police responded, confirmed her identity and took her into custody, where she made statements implicating herself in the crime, police spokesman Paul Browne said.
The district attorney said such hateful remarks about Muslims and Hindus could not be tolerated.
"The defendant is accused of committing what is every subway commuter's worst nightmare," he said.
On Dec. 3, a Korean-born man was pushed to his death in a Times Square subway station. A photo of the man clinging to the edge of the platform a split second before he was struck by a train was published on the front page of the New York Post, causing an uproar about whether the photographer, who was catching a train, or anyone else should have tried to help him.
A homeless man was arrested and charged with murder in that case. He claimed he acted in self-defense and is awaiting trial.
It's unclear whether anyone tried - or could have tried - to help Sun on Thursday.
Mayor Michael Bloomberg on Friday urged residents to keep Sen's death in perspective as he touted new historic lows in the city's annual homicide and shooting totals.
"It's a very tragic case, but what we want to focus on today is the overall safety in New York," Bloomberg told reporters following a police academy graduation.
But commuters still expressed concern over subway safety and shock about the arrest of Menendez on a hate crime charge.
"For someone to do something like that ... that's not the way we are made," said David Green, who was waiting for a train in Manhattan. "She needs help."
Green said he caught himself leaning over the subway platform's edge and realized maybe he shouldn't do that.
"It does make you more conscious," he said of the deaths.
Such subway deaths are rare, but other high-profile cases include the 1999 fatal shoving of aspiring screenwriter Kendra Webdale by a former psychiatric patient. That case led to a state law named after her that allows for more supervision of mentally ill people living outside institutions.


text:
Friday, June 19, 2009
Dastardly Dad Designs
Friday, June 19, 2009
Yep - tied for worst icing cohesion and worst neckwear representation. Unless that's supposed to be an alien joystick, of course. In which case, someone needs a checkup. Ew.
How about some tasty powdered hot dogs on the grill?
And for the discriminating Dad, there's always this classic WTF design:
Jeremiah L. submitted this beauty over 10 months ago, and I still have no idea what it's supposed to be. A car? A grill? A set of weights? A toolbox? A lunchbox? Elmo? Herbie the Love Bug? A picnic basket? Bertie Bott's fizzing whizbees? Phil Spector? Seriously, WHAT IS THIS?!?
Stephanie H. & Phyllis L., I think I need to lie down for a bit. That white spot on the bottom chocolate cupcake is making me question my own sanity.
- Related Wreckage: Face Time on CW
190 comments | Post a Comment
- Hannah said...
Wickedly horrible!
- June 19, 2009 at 8:31 AM
- beautifulmonday said...
i think it's one of those round red grills. but it is very 'interpretive'.
- June 19, 2009 at 8:38 AM
I thing you guess right with gas grill--see the white thing on the side, that's the propane tank, and the brown swath across the front is the lid handle? But sheesh, who has a RED grill?
WV: harkin--I'm harkin' up a big PTOOOIEEEE for that CCC wreck! - June 19, 2009 at 8:39 AM
- Kellie said...
What about the "D" on that first pic? "Happy Father's ay? . . . . D"
- June 19, 2009 at 8:40 AM
- Freya said...
- June 19, 2009 at 8:45 AM
I think it is red grill with the lid down!
- June 19, 2009 at 8:47 AM
- Heather said...
Was the "D" in the 1st one supposed to be falling or is that just an added extra?
- June 19, 2009 at 8:50 AM
- Katherine said...
I think the alien weenie is AWESOME!!!!! Maybe my dad would like that.. He is a fan of Star Trek! :P
- June 19, 2009 at 8:53 AM
- Julie said...
I'm going with the red grill, but ONLY because of the white object on the side, which appears to be a propane tank.
- June 19, 2009 at 8:57 AM
- Unknown said...
The first cake had me puzzled for ages! I seriously couldn't figure out what it said. At one point I thought it said Happy Fathore, oy! The worst thing is you never actually know with these cakes either.
I think I need someone to explain to me why the D has walked off on its own. - June 19, 2009 at 9:01 AM
Hard to tell by the position of the sticker, but the cupcake grill mess looks like it says, "Happy Father! Day"
Just me? - June 19, 2009 at 9:05 AM
- Carrie Penny said...
on the second one my money is on phil spector!
- June 19, 2009 at 9:08 AM
Wow...I was going for "boombox" on that red one, but that was after staring at it for 10 minutes and getting a little dizzy. At least I know what to get my husband to make him laugh...
- June 19, 2009 at 9:10 AM
It's a grill. The white spot on the bottom cupcake is supposed to make it look like a wheel.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:16 AM
- Unknown said...
I think the last one might be a taxi or car created by someone with "Constructional dyspraxia" (the inability to relate parts to a whole). You seem to have several examples throughout you blog! If you look carefully, you have the wheels, the windscreen seems to have slid off to the right, the brown amorphic shape could be the grill and headlights. (Although they may also be confused by the 'grill' definition here)and...
OK, so now I'm clutching at straws! - June 19, 2009 at 9:20 AM
It's Stevie What's-Her-Name's interpretation of a Webber grill.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:21 AM
- Kelly said...
Second cake: that's what people get when trying for a dreaded CCC!
- June 19, 2009 at 9:22 AM
- Jo Asakura said...
Alien Joystick- i see what you did there. :LOLOLOL:
"Phil Spector?"
wv: botarqui. It sounds like an exotic liqueur.
"bring me some more botarqui and rum. I still can't tell what that last cake's supposed t'be!" - June 19, 2009 at 9:23 AM
- Kelly said...
Sorry, my last comment should have read: the THIRD cake is what people get when they attempt the dreaded CCC!
- June 19, 2009 at 9:26 AM
It's definitely a grill...notice how the plastic silverware looks like the grill tools? C'mon now!
- June 19, 2009 at 9:27 AM
Okay my 3 year old walked up, pointed, and said it's Mickey Mouse's car.
How can you argue with that? - June 19, 2009 at 9:29 AM
- Beth said...
That is so awful. But, yeah red grill like this - http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0007XXNQS
- June 19, 2009 at 9:30 AM
- Alisa Knits! said...
The question is... Are the knife and fork a part of the design, or were they thrown in as a nicety for that one super picky eater who always embarrasses you at dinner by sending back three dirty knives and using a fork to eat their french fries?
- June 19, 2009 at 9:30 AM
- Kathleen said...
Oh no, the poor "D" fell down, go boom! :*(
- June 19, 2009 at 9:31 AM
- Unknown said...
Okay I've got it. I think the last one is a BBQ grill. The plastic utensils had me thrown but here goes.....It's one of those round topped grills. It has the meat fork and other tools that hanging from the grill on one side and a towel hanging on the other side and those are wheels on the bottom. Whew! Ow! I think my head hurts........
WV: blons - how a blond spells blonds - June 19, 2009 at 9:32 AM
- tracyvanhorne said...
HA! That last thing is a riot! Ah, I love this blog...
- June 19, 2009 at 9:33 AM
- Cathy said...
At first I thought "it" was "father". I can almost see a head (like beetlejuices), a large body, legs, hands holding silverwear. But, now I too think it is a red grill. a charcoal one with the lid down.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:37 AM
- Belle Epoque said...
My dad's aesthetic would just love those cakes...he's in it for the cake primarily after all...
- June 19, 2009 at 9:37 AM
- thetoddlerwhisperer said...
hahahahaha... at first I thought the red one was Chef from South Park...
- June 19, 2009 at 9:37 AM
Liked the way you snuck the Phil Spector comment in...where you thinking with the wig on or off?
- June 19, 2009 at 9:40 AM
- Kristin said...
"Phil Spektor"? HA! I think I actually cackled. How embarrassing.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:40 AM
- Mikewind Dale (Michael Makovi) said...
I think the one with the burgers and hot dogs actually looks pretty cool.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:41 AM
- YarnWrecks said...
I couldn't decide between the worst depiction of a La-Z-Boy chair or a grill. I think I'll go with the grill. I can't identify the chocolate cupcakes though - meat? grill legs? aliens?
- June 19, 2009 at 9:45 AM
- Unknown said...
It's totally Fat Albert.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:47 AM
- The Courteous Chihuahua said...
Alien joy stick...bahahaha!
I now need a conversation in which to use that phrase! - June 19, 2009 at 9:53 AM
- Dorci said...
ROTFL....Phil Spector..LOL...white spot....LOL....oh my..first good laugh I've had in days.
I looked at that last cake from all angles. I would say it's a car but the knife and fork definitely throw me off of that. I'll have to keep looking. - June 19, 2009 at 9:55 AM
The first thing I saw was a beheaded Santa. Yep, nothing says "I love you Dad" like a dismembered off-season CCC.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:58 AM
- Molly Helpychalk said...
Guys. Obviously it's a sumo wrestler. Seen from behind. Who has broken his leg. And splinted it with cutlery. Duh.
- June 19, 2009 at 9:58 AM
- Joanie said...
Are those real hotdogs on that cake?
- June 19, 2009 at 9:59 AM
- Joanie said...
and real cheese on the "burgers"?
- June 19, 2009 at 10:00 AM
- k.spear said...
Yep, that looks like the weird red grill (square?) my husband picked up at home depot last year. Maybe the wreckorator was drunk?
- June 19, 2009 at 10:02 AM
- Unknown said...
That 3rd CCC (patooey!) is just wrong.
http://uberfoodnoob.blogspot.com/ - June 19, 2009 at 10:10 AM
I have to say that last one appears to be a very badly executed Weber grill, gas bottle and all. And the white spot is an axle hub I presume.
But "Happy Father's Day" to all the "ads" out there... - June 19, 2009 at 10:12 AM
- hd said...
I can't get past the green-tinted hamburgers on the second one. Ew.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:13 AM
The third cake is the Typewriter from Sesame Street!
I can see why people might think it's a red Weber grill, aside from being a CCC (pah!), but it's not! It's the Typewriter. I recognised it immediately. - June 19, 2009 at 10:20 AM
- Skye said...
The red cake is like one of those pictures in a psychiatrist's office... "Now, tell me what you see..."
- June 19, 2009 at 10:20 AM
- pyrajane said...
It's the Kool-Aid Man!
- June 19, 2009 at 10:21 AM
Koolaid Man?
- June 19, 2009 at 10:21 AM
- Larissa said...
That last one is Amy Winehouse, no one knows what she's supposed to be either.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:22 AM
That last cake is a glorious wreck! It is the Rorschach ink test of cupcake cakes -- what you see in that undulating mass of red and ambiguously incongruous details speaks volumes about what lies in your soul. As for me, I saw what the beloved cartoon character, Fat Albert, would look like after getting run over by a steamroller. R.I.P., Albert.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:23 AM
"But sheesh, who has a RED grill?"
I have a red grill. :( It doesn't look anything like THAT, though. - June 19, 2009 at 10:24 AM
- Aliana said...
"It a gril!"
- June 19, 2009 at 10:27 AM
Glad to see I wasn't the only one to see Chef from South Park in that red "cake".
- June 19, 2009 at 10:28 AM
- Knitty said...
It is clearly a very overweight man in a red shirt, sitting on a white headstone. He is wearing a mask that says "Happy Father! Day" because he is embarrassed to show his face after two beavers died in his lap. Apparently he bent over, suffocating them, and their flattened bodies and paddle-like tails became his belt.
His pudgy legs have overgrown his knees. One ankle requires support in the form of a large white pin while the other is supported by plastic tableware.
I'm surprised you all didn't recognize this. :) - June 19, 2009 at 10:28 AM
That last one looks like the typewriter guy from Sesame Street..
- June 19, 2009 at 10:30 AM
That letter "D" is trying to escape because it's too embarrassed to be associated with that "tie"!
- June 19, 2009 at 10:30 AM
- Aly said...
Yep, I think it's one of those red grills too. Maybe they were just trying to be 'artistic'. Actually I am hoping to find a cake wreck for Father's Day. My dad has a great sense of humor and not doubt would love a wrecked cake!
- June 19, 2009 at 10:36 AM
I kept staring at that thing under the 'tie'... I just couldnt figure out what it was... I hadnt read the yet, but after I did I thought 'where's the D?' Oh there it is! hehehe
And those burgers on the grill look mighty green yum - June 19, 2009 at 10:42 AM
- sleeplessnights04 said...
I think that it's a person, abstract as it is. :o)
- June 19, 2009 at 10:42 AM
- Melinda said...
I love all of the interpretations of the CCC. It certainly is wrecksational.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:51 AM
- Sara said...
I think these Wreckorators are making completely ridiculous CCC's just to spite you, now.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:53 AM
- Unknown said...
I think the D is so embarrassed/ terrified that it's trying to make a break for it!
- June 19, 2009 at 10:53 AM
- Kim said...
I asked my 6 year old what it is. He said, "Maybe a Turkey?"
- June 19, 2009 at 11:03 AM
- Kate said...
I too think the red blob is supposed to be a grill- but from the side, rather than top down. The charred hamburger/hotdog combo is actually the lid handle, the white thing is the propane, the brown sticks are the stand and wheels.
Talk about your non-Euclidean geometry. - June 19, 2009 at 11:08 AM
- E.A.D. said...
That has got to be the worst representation of a grill I've ever seen! It looks like something you'd see on a bad acid trip.
- June 19, 2009 at 11:15 AM
- Wendy said...
Aliana: I laughed. A lot.
It *is* a gril! - June 19, 2009 at 11:23 AM
If that's Chef, his hat fell off.
The second one almost works. I think with different color choices -- and hot dogs free of mold -- it would have worked. - June 19, 2009 at 11:26 AM
- ET said...
Those hamburgers look a bit green. Ewww.
- June 19, 2009 at 11:31 AM
- Raychel said...
I guess I'm having a pregnancy craving because I still want to eat them... all them : )
Raychel - MyCreativeWay.blogspot.com - June 19, 2009 at 11:33 AM
- Charity Charity Ichiban! said...
I would have never guessed that CCC was supposed to be a grill.
- June 19, 2009 at 11:35 AM
- Meg said...
The last one is obviously a Rohrshach Cake - just what DO you see?
- June 19, 2009 at 11:46 AM
That hot dog isn't "powdered." It's the one that slipped through the grill into the ash-coverd coals. Then Dad said "carbon is good for the digestion" as he fished the dog out of the coals and put it back on the grill to finish burning.
- June 19, 2009 at 11:47 AM
- Vindiciti said...
My first thought about the "tie" cake was that it was a board game spinner which was pointing in the general direction of the missing "D" from "Day" which slid to the bottom. LOL! I had to see the word "tie" to even SEE the tie!
- June 19, 2009 at 11:59 AM
- Unknown said...
Abstract wreck at its finest!
~Amy B.
wv: loggin: what the lumberjacks do. - June 19, 2009 at 11:59 AM
- Morgan the Muse said...
uhm... I knew it was a tie, but it was still very distressing.
- June 19, 2009 at 12:01 PM
I seem to see a headrest at the top, and the brown circles at the bottom could be legs. Is it a chair? Like, Dad's chair?
- June 19, 2009 at 12:24 PM
- Kimberly said...
Oh I think its a grill, but your original title for it made me cry laughing. Man I love your blog!
- June 19, 2009 at 12:29 PM
These are absolutely disgusting. . . seriously, some of these cakes really make me wonder about the mental well being of the decorator.
- June 19, 2009 at 12:43 PM
- Suzanne Dargie said...
If that red thing is supposed to be a BBQ grill with the lid down, then that baker/decorator should be roasted on one!
- June 19, 2009 at 12:55 PM
- LaurenH said...
HA! Yes, I'm almost positive that last one is supposed to be a grill ("supposed to" being the operative words) but I think Phil Spector is a good second guess ;)
- June 19, 2009 at 1:03 PM
- Eternal Lizdom said...
How sweet that professional decorators are bringing in children to decorate cakes for their dads!!
- June 19, 2009 at 1:07 PM
Assuming the knife and fork are ON the cake, the bottom looks like a place setting to me (upside-down) with the white spot being a cup next to a napkin on the right?
- June 19, 2009 at 1:07 PM
- Charlene said...
I'd have to go with gas grill. Pretty blobby, though.
- June 19, 2009 at 1:21 PM
Powdery hot dogs and moldy hamburgers...yummy, yum, yum... Nothing says Happy Father's Day like a daily dose of penicillin...
- June 19, 2009 at 1:21 PM
I actually think the last "un-cake" looks like Typewriter Guy from Seasame Street:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3tgrEvpPck - June 19, 2009 at 1:25 PM
the last one kinda reminds me of the kool-aid guy
- June 19, 2009 at 1:31 PM
- jackie31337 said...
Drawn to Caricature said I think the last one might be a taxi or car created by someone with "Constructional dyspraxia" (the inability to relate parts to a whole).
I wonder if that's how cubism came to exist. That CCC strikes me as a very creative attempt to convey some very deep symbolism, but unfortunately none of us earthlings can understand its meaning. - June 19, 2009 at 1:33 PM
- Alison said...
I love these creative little assignments, and I love the responses just as much!
I'm going with the "it a gril" crowd (Aliana ftw). But, if I try really hard and squint my eyes, it kinda looks a little like the Jetson's robot Rosie...only the Dad version also cuts the lawn, chars up some dusty 'dogs, and brings you a beer, all while holding you in the perfectly reclined position for watching sports or "resting your eyes."
Phew, that took some doing. But Dad's worth it. - June 19, 2009 at 1:33 PM
- Chris Z. said...
I thought I was looking at the backside of Mario working on plumbing with the third picture.
- June 19, 2009 at 1:41 PM
they did a good job on the knife and fork though. whoa... almost real.
- June 19, 2009 at 1:41 PM
- jackie31337 said...
Also, Knitty is my new hero.
- June 19, 2009 at 1:48 PM
- Jami said...
My daughter suggested that the last cake was the father's head but was needing eyes. Maybe?
Jami H. :) - June 19, 2009 at 1:49 PM
- peewee said...
I thought it was supposed to be "Further".
- June 19, 2009 at 1:52 PM
- Unknown said...
Clearly the last one is a Transformer. Happy Fathers Oy everyone!
- June 19, 2009 at 1:59 PM
- ilene said...
I think the last cake is supposed to be a grill.... good try!
- June 19, 2009 at 2:06 PM
- Kara said...
lol, I think that last one is a George Foreman grill or something, wow that's ugly.
And that Alien "Joystick", gross!!
Kara - June 19, 2009 at 2:16 PM
- the un-bride said...
My money's on Phil Spector for pic #3. Nothing else looks that weird.
- June 19, 2009 at 2:18 PM
- Scritzy said...
The third one is blowing my mind. I can see that it MIGHT be a gas grill ...
... except I think the person who designed and decorated it might have been huffing the propane.
Gad. My head hurts.
Word verification: graticke. Gratitude that you didn't get an icke CCC. - June 19, 2009 at 2:23 PM
- Lisa said...
Yikes! It's like Elmo roadkill slapped on a gas grill covered in ketchup. Wretched.
- June 19, 2009 at 2:36 PM
- Bec said...
not to mention that on the first one that somehow the D from Day got put way down at the bottom.............
- June 19, 2009 at 2:58 PM
- Les DuLunch said...
Is that bacon hanging out of both sides of the last cake? At least it has one redeeming quality.
- June 19, 2009 at 3:00 PM
Oh dear me. I hope that second one really isn't covered in CHEESE!
- June 19, 2009 at 3:01 PM
Cool! That first cake is written in Pig Latin.
- June 19, 2009 at 3:07 PM
- Tara said...
Nevermind the powdery hot dogs... what about the grey-green, sickly, "this meat has been sitting out in the sun too long" hamburgers???
- June 19, 2009 at 3:15 PM
- Theatre Geek said...
That last cake is definitely a barbecue grill. The white thing? A propane tank. The cupcakes? Wheels. The thing on the front? A handle.
It's sad that I can tell what it is supposed to be because I think I SHOULDN'T be able to tell.
The handle looks more like two hamburger patties falling off onto the front of the barbecue - which, is close, so it makes no sense. Or, perhaps it's a horrible mangled car. It's an autoNObile? Get it? Get it? (Told ya I was a bit of a punner myself!)
Bridget - June 19, 2009 at 3:24 PM
- Tiffany @ Engagement 101 said...
My first thought was chef from South Park, but apparently he's wearing a phone for a belt and had his breakfast surgically implanted into his legs.
- June 19, 2009 at 3:25 PM
- Chakolate said...
I hate to say this, O my how I hate to say this, but it's a car. A red car with brown (!) headlights. See the four wheels beneath it?
Now I have to go put a fork in my eyes. - June 19, 2009 at 3:55 PM
- ~ L. K. said...
I think the last one is a literal mix between a car and grill. It's one of those eye-teasers, where it could be two things, depending on your interpretation. I think it was originally, possibly, a car, and then they were like 'This doesn't look like a car!' so added on a napkin and a fork and knife. Now it's both.
- June 19, 2009 at 3:57 PM
I think you have yet to notice... that cake of... of... something... is a (dramatic tan-tan-tun music) cupcake cake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
- June 19, 2009 at 4:00 PM
- June 19, 2009 at 4:08 PM
Anybody notice that the grill in Wreck #2 could not have made the grill marks on those particular hotdogs?
- June 19, 2009 at 4:20 PM
- foodcreate.com said...
Look like a red grills . but who knows.
Have a great Day ~~~ - June 19, 2009 at 4:28 PM
- sendingtheclowns said...
The hot dogs on the first "grill" were apparently pre-cooked on a DIFFERENT grill, because the spacing of the hot dog's burn-lines are too close together for them to have been cooked on the grill they are lounging on--which also, by the way, has NO heat source anyway. Seemingly, someone left the grill out in the rain...(at MacArthur Park?)
- June 19, 2009 at 4:30 PM
- Pirate Alice said...
if that's supposed to be a grill, why is there a fork and knife in there? Don't they know the utensils would melt if put on the grill?
And on the hotdog cake, are those butterflies around the edge? My dad would NOT appreciate a Father's Day cake with butterflies on it. - June 19, 2009 at 4:37 PM
- Nonna said...
Oh, no...All I can ask is:
Do people really pay for these awful cakes ? How can the bakery dept. manager let things like that leave the store ? Just a couple more mysteries of the universe... - June 19, 2009 at 4:39 PM
I'm seeing Fat Albert.
- June 19, 2009 at 4:48 PM
- sendingtheclowns said...
Heaven (or more likely, Hell) only knows the "raison d'etre" for the Big Red Question of the Century cake.
Sometimes, things are best just left alone... - June 19, 2009 at 4:49 PM
It's the typewriter from Sesame Street!
- June 19, 2009 at 5:01 PM
I think what kills me the most is that the first cake is clearly a display one, not one set out for sale. So someone actually made the decision that a cookie cake with an alien joystick "tie," where the green icing from the "tie" is creeping out from under the black outline to form a haphazard smudge of green and the D is making a run from it to save its dignity was something they should set out on display to entice customers to order their Fathers' ay cookie cakes. Because when you see that mess as the display, and you assume that it represents their best (or at least better) work, as a display should, you're going to be all about having them decorate a cake for your special occasion.
- June 19, 2009 at 5:20 PM
- Meg said...
A+ Harry Potter reference!
- June 19, 2009 at 5:36 PM
How the heck do these people get hired to do cakes? *Shakes head* Love the "Italian Joystick." Lol.
- June 19, 2009 at 5:42 PM
- Bonnie the Beautiful said...
Happy Father's day to all the dads. These cakes make me feel better about what I got for my dad. It sure isn't a cake wreck!
- June 19, 2009 at 5:54 PM
I also think it is a red grill with a white propane tank. It is horrible!!!
- June 19, 2009 at 6:24 PM
The last wreck is clearly a grill to me, the knife and fork hanging down are obviously supposed to be grill tools hanging off the handle. With this superior level of artistry, you wouldn't want to wreck the interpretation by trying to draw such tools, when the plastic cutlery make such a statement!
WV: curioni -- The curious readers of this blog; i.e., That last wreck prompted multiple interpretations by the curioni. - June 19, 2009 at 7:20 PM
- buttonsandyarn said...
Oh my goodness....that last one although there are many possiblities....to me it just looks like a mess of cupcakes thrown together with a free set of plastic silverware...just terrible!
- June 19, 2009 at 7:22 PM
- Cyndi and Stumpy said...
5 or 6 more botarquies with rum and i could figure it out...
- June 19, 2009 at 7:45 PM
- Kangarara said...
I call 'planarian worm' on the first one.
- June 19, 2009 at 8:19 PM
You are seriously disturbed. Or on drugs. Can I have some?!
As for the rest of you who recognized the red blob as a grill--kudos to you. Though Typewriter Man was a good guess.
That first cake was almost pornographic... - June 19, 2009 at 8:26 PM
- Unknown said...
It's a grill... the red is the grill drum, the horribly cross-hatched brown is a wooden handle, and the white is a propane tank! and the white dot in the bottom right is the wheel axle.
it's just...
..imaginative? - June 19, 2009 at 8:50 PM
- ::poltergasm:: said...
flip it over.
it's a crab, one from whose legs have already been removed & probably boiled [for &/or by the father in question]. but its learning to find joy in life again——thats a radio it has up against its brightly opened eyestalk.
& notice the firm & serious set of the mouth. thats cos it is protesting against the further mutilation/ingestion of members of its species, its protest sign being shaped like a knife & fork & held against the closed eye of its left eyestalk, symbolizing the closed mind of the crustacean-eater.
someone clearly just put the inscription on upside down, thats all.
[ps. yes, i am a vegetarian. & you may thank this vegetarian for the certainly & absolutely proper interpretation of this profound cake.] - June 19, 2009 at 9:44 PM
I definitely saw Chef from South Park in the third cake, although I'm 90% certain that it's a grill with the lid down.
The second one... oh gosh.... I was more put off by the cheese than the grey detail on the hot dog.
The first one made me laugh so hard, my tea almost wound up all over my keyboard. It looks as if the decorator changed his/her mind as to where the word 'day' should go. - June 19, 2009 at 9:46 PM
I think it's a coleman grill....RoadTrip Pro SS Grill. if you google image it, there are some with white hubcaps.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:02 PM
These comments are the best yet. Cracking me up!
The post was good too, Jen. Ha!
My husband asked me if I was laughing or crying in here.
WV: Vivesse
If your alien joystick is not up to par, try Vivesse, available at a CVS in your quadrant of the galaxy. - June 19, 2009 at 10:10 PM
- Dorci said...
Wow, what oddly ironic timing that you have an add for condoms in your sidebar right now. Eew.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:12 PM
As soon as I saw the last cake, I knew it was Fat Albert:
"Hey, Hey. Hey! Have a Happy Fathead's, er, Father's Day!" - June 19, 2009 at 10:15 PM
My vote on the red cake is also Fat Albert. Perhaps Fat Albert as interpreted by an enthusiastic scholar of cubism.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:20 PM
Re: the first one, I was so confused by the whatsit-tie that I didn't even notice that the 'D' in 'Day' was trying to make an escape.
- June 19, 2009 at 10:51 PM
Did anyone else see Chef from South Park in that last cake?
- June 19, 2009 at 11:29 PM
oops that's why you should read the comments before you make one... i see i'm not alone in my chef thought
- June 19, 2009 at 11:30 PM
- Jeremiah L said...
My friend photographed that grill Father's Day '06 and went back and asked the decorator the next day when they couldn't figure out what the cake was depicting. They had a whole set of Father's Day themed cakes including football, fish and tents. The utensils are supposed to be large grilling tools and the white is a propane tank.
canofzebras.com - June 19, 2009 at 11:47 PM
- Jeremiah L said...
My friend took that grill photo around Father's Day '06 and went back the next day to ask the decorator what the cake was depicting. There was a whole set of Father's Day cakes with tents, fish, footballs etc. The knife and fork are supposed to be the large grilling tools and that is in fact a propane tank.
www.canofzebras.com - June 19, 2009 at 11:52 PM
"Bertie Bott's Fizzing Whizbee's"
YES! - June 20, 2009 at 12:27 AM
- Elke Hollic =^..^= said...
I concur. That red monstrosity is Fat Albert. That was what immediately sprang to my mind and it was then followed by the thought that he was exposed to high levels of radituon and was now a melty mutant but Fat Albert none the less.
That first one is totally a penis in the guise of a tie.
=^..^= - June 20, 2009 at 2:52 AM
- fisheggs said...
I agree the closest thing it could be is a grill. Hideous cake!
- June 20, 2009 at 7:38 AM
My guess is that the red thing is a George Foreman grill and the other items are food (sitting on the counter top of course ::shudder::) waiting to be Foremanized.
- June 20, 2009 at 9:23 AM
The cookie cake is obviously made by a Canadian imposter. "Happy Father's, ay" A TRUE Canadian knows it is spelled "eh" not "ay".
- June 20, 2009 at 9:30 AM
- Unknown said...
My daughter says the last one looks like Santa Claus' butt.
~Amy B. - June 20, 2009 at 10:22 AM
- Bald Outing said...
people really need to think these cake designs through first.
- baldouting.blogspot.com - June 20, 2009 at 11:14 AM
- Zazzy The Geek said...
I have been staring at that red thing for a while... I think its a grill.... maybe..... er... crap.... brain cells dying. Why?
- June 20, 2009 at 12:41 PM
- blissfully caffeinated said...
Is "alien joystick" a euphemism for penis that I been heretofore unaware of?
- June 20, 2009 at 2:12 PM
...It's got to be chef from South Park. That was all I could see
- June 20, 2009 at 4:17 PM
- Chakolate said...
@Blissfully caffeinated: I think the 'alien' part just came because it's green. However, I do think all future 'joystick' manglings must and should now be called 'alien joysticks'.
Won't that be a lovely tribute to this wreckerator? - June 20, 2009 at 6:04 PM
- sendingtheclowns said...
I have secret info on the first cake:
This is actually a prototype for a new BOARD GAME.
Here's how it works:
A bunch of letters & stuff is scattered willy-nilly over the top of a frosted cake, see?
Then you attach a thing --which could be mistaken for a necktie, but which is actually an arrow--to the center.
That's your "spinner".
Players take turns spinning the arrow and seeing if it will hit the letters hard enough and well enough to scatter /rearrange and form actual words. Then they shoot for sentences (or "inscriptions").
Someone was doing pretty well here until a bad spin bopped the "D" right out of the ballpark.
[Ages 6 & up. Not a fat-free game.
Parental guidance discouraged.]
>^@@^< - June 20, 2009 at 8:04 PM
- Leigh said...
that last one is seriously the most perplexing cake I have ever seen. WHAT IS IT?
- June 20, 2009 at 8:08 PM
- mdp928 said...
I too believe it is the classic red grill, yet it appears to be a dual axle model-- perhaps to support the seemingly 175 pound lid.
- June 21, 2009 at 12:07 AM
- Chakolate said...
Oooh, sendingtheclowns - you should patent that - or trademark it, or something. A game you can eat is a great idea.
- June 21, 2009 at 2:44 AM
The "powder" on the hot dogs has to be meant as the charcoal ash that clings to the wieners when they inevitably fall through the grill plate onto the coals! Then Mom or Dad takes a long fork and fishes the wienies out and plops them back on the grill. Yum! Nothing like that taste... it is probably the cause of all manner of illnesses.
- June 21, 2009 at 4:59 AM
- sendingtheclowns said...
Chakolate said...
Oooh, sendingtheclowns - you should patent that - or trademark it, or something. A game you can eat is a great idea.
Thanks for the suggestion, but I thought there already WAS a game (or two) that you can eat.
Or doesn't *everybody* play marbles with gumballs...???
And then, there's also Pin the Tail on the Pizza...
Licorice Lasso Roundup...
My brain is getting foggy....
>^=.=^< - June 21, 2009 at 11:49 AM
You say the red "gas grill" was sent to you over 10 months ago. I saw one in my local market yesterday! Apparently this has a template. The salutation was plastic. It is no more comprehensible now, either.
- June 21, 2009 at 11:56 AM
- Unknown said...
My daughter (6) looked at the last one and said "Oh, a fireplace. Why are they burning the silverware?"
wv: boars- Not all Dad's are boars on father's day. :) - June 21, 2009 at 2:08 PM
- Kellykat said...
In the name of all that is holy, please.... WTF is that red thing?!?!?! I'm laughing and getting even more confused and freaked out by the second!!!
WV: unico (reads as unique-oh) That sure is one unico wreck. - June 21, 2009 at 10:01 PM
it a grill. seriously.
- June 22, 2009 at 12:27 AM
I agree the third one is a red gas grill on wheels, but I have to wonder, with all that lovely space on the red lid why did this decorator decide to cram 'Happy Father's Day' into the little brown blob on top?
- June 22, 2009 at 12:47 AM
I think the red CCC is a Mazda that didn't get assembled correctly (or maybe the buyer was supposed to put it together since it wouldn't fit in the box otherwise). The two white CC are s'posed to be the windshield, it's got three tires, a steering wheel...
Zoom, Zoom! - June 22, 2009 at 10:06 AM
I seriously think I laughed for about 5 minutes on this one.
The description killed me.
My stomach hurts. - June 22, 2009 at 11:35 AM
It's the Kool-Aid Man! OOOOHHHHHHH YEAHHHHH!
- June 22, 2009 at 3:23 PM
the last one is Snoopy's dog house after his attempt to cook the 'round headed kid' some lunch.
- June 22, 2009 at 4:16 PM
- Kyra said...
I know what it is: It's a fat lady bending over (away from our view). The chair is breaking as she does so.
- June 22, 2009 at 9:00 PM
- Julie Thorup said...
Oh my gosh! I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!
That hot dogs on the grill one is so nasty! It looks like to peachy pink things at the sides are severed tongues hanging out of the cake! Plus, why are the burgers poo green?
I can't figure out what that last one is supposed to be either, and the longer I look at it, the more I just find myself laughing histerically. - June 23, 2009 at 12:31 AM
I think it looks like a barber's chair.... I mean, there ARE barbers who are fathers. Maybe even mean fathers that inspire their kids to send them cakes that say, "Hey! we like ya. DON'T QUIT YOUR DAY JOB!"
The white thing on the side? DUH! It's a garbage can! Like, "If you do happen to quit, we can kick Oscar The Grouch out of the can in the alley... So anyway, you keeping your job, RIGHT?!? - June 24, 2009 at 9:19 PM
- amanda nabas said...
phil spector?
you are just unbelievably funny.
so glad i can read in english...
thanks for your creativity
amanda - June 27, 2009 at 6:57 PM
I CANNOT stop laughing at this!
- June 28, 2009 at 4:55 AM
Sendingtheclowns-- I've never played marbles with gumballs, but when I was a kid we learned to play poker with uncooked macaroni, and then with chocolate chips. (game ends when there are no chips left....)
- June 29, 2009 at 8:56 PM
It's a grill.....I think!
- July 1, 2009 at 6:41 PM
my husband thinks it's fat albert showing his belt.
- July 3, 2009 at 10:12 PM
it´s a transformer!
- July 3, 2009 at 10:23 PM
I thought that was Chef from South Park.
- July 15, 2009 at 9:51 PM
- Pelly said...
That last cake..
Simple and obvious...it's a WTFBBQ.
Internet memes as cake. Yum. - July 17, 2009 at 11:23 AM
Christmas town?
- July 30, 2009 at 1:12 AM
- Heather said...
My 2 year old is here with me looking at the cakes on your site, and coming across this one, she tells me "that's not birthday cake, that's couch!" haha, random.
- August 28, 2009 at 6:01 AM
The last one.. it's Epcot!
- September 13, 2009 at 9:42 PM
- J said...
So many people commented on this one, and not one person pointed out the Harry Potter mistake!
Sorry to be a nitpicker, but Bertie Botts made the Every Flavor Beans, not the Fizzing Whizbees...and sorry to be so late, but I just discovered this blog and I'm going back through old posts.
Awesome for using an HP reference, though!
J - November 30, 2009 at 11:36 PM
Oh, come now. Bertie Bott makes the jelly beans. Fizzing Whizbees are their own thing.
But that is a hilarious cake, & that's what I'm here for. - January 31, 2010 at 1:08 AM
- Plangkye said...
Looks like Fat Albert to me.
- March 11, 2010 at 6:27 PM
It's a grill
- March 11, 2010 at 6:44 PM
I think it is supposed to be a grill. The knife and fork are the "tongs" for the BBQ that are hanging off the front handle. Wheels are at the base. The white box, possibly the propane tank??
- June 7, 2010 at 10:47 AM
- Bridget said...
on the last cake, it's also a wreck because it says "Happy Fahjer! Day." near the top.
but I guess it is sort of small.
the inscription. - July 27, 2010 at 1:39 PM
I think it is supposed to be a naugahyde Easy Chair seen head on. Great work! - September 27, 2010 at 2:51 PM
- estelle martin said...
the last one-1st its a ccc (yuck yuck yuck!!!) but part of me wants to say its santas belly with some random limbs sprayed abouut but on the other hand i think its a bad ccc(yuck yuck yuck!)grill
- July 3, 2011 at 10:39 PM
- estelle martin said...
part of me wants to say its santas stomach....
- July 5, 2011 at 12:53 AM
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A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
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text:
It's pretty clear this is no Fitness First or Virgin gym. I reveal the Spartan nature of the ISAF headquarters gym in Kabul.
At first glance, you could be forgiven for thinking this was just another local gym – smaller, lacking the glossy finish and with a whiff of boiled clothes and sweat rather than expensive soaps and washing powder – but with TV screens and the latest equipment laid out in regimented rows whirring away at all times of day and night.
A closer look and it's pretty clear this is no Fitness First or Virgin gym. Back home the treadmills, steppers and bikes are placed a comfortable distance apart to allow for kindle-readers and social bikers not to be offended or sprayed by Tour de France/ marathon wannabes on an adjacent apparatus.
No such attention to feng shui on operations. There is barely space to pop your towel down (and into this sauna, access is denied without one) on the floor without coming into contact with your next-door neighbour's flailing trainer.
Water is provided – a large pile of plastic bottles inside the door – and the view out of the windows tends to be limited to different shades of concrete blast walls.
There is as you would expect a larger proportion of men here – particularly if you are brave enough to venture into the free weights corner where hulking men are quite literally lifting the gym. Where fitness centres back home offer a catwalk of the best designer gear; here there is a distinct lack of lycra and any deviation from grey/black shorts and t-shirts attracts considerable attention.
Unsurprisingly, you'd be pushed to find anyone overweight and most are a study in good nutrition and peak physical fitness. And it's a multi-national camp all the way to its exercise regimes. The Macedonian Force Protection unit are more likely to be seen bulking up on the heavy weights; the Americans lift as a team and can be heard shouting encouragement at each other as one poor soul grunts his way through dead-lifts.
The UK contingent tend to be built more for speed – monopolising the running machines, while the French have their own reserved area on the spinning bikes. Whatever your nationality, the rules are rigid. You are expected to religiously clean off your machine, carry your ID card at all times, and most exercisers have one eye on their mobile phone should they be called back to work to respond to an incident.
Compared to the improvised gyms created by soldiers in patrol bases – dumbbells made of battery packs and chin-up bars hammered into compound walls – this is sheer luxury.
But in a headquarters where the pace of life requires personnel to endure the long hours and long months under huge pressure, the gym remains a functional area, a crucial and integral part of the workplace, where the speediest of stress-busting workouts is squeezed into the long working day. We are all expected to be 'fit to fight' and that applies whether you're a General commanding the campaign, a clerk in an admin office or an infantryman on the front line. A glance beyond the iPods and the treadmills reminds you just how far removed you are from your Fitness First back home; within arms' reach of every runner, cyclist, rower and weight-lifter is a loaded weapon that never leaves their side.


text:
It is hard to talk about cajun and creole cuisine without mentioning etouffee and with good reason given how easy it is to make and how tasty it is! Etouffee is a thick stew that is made with a roux that is cooked until deep brown to ensure that it is full of flavour. The meat in etouffee is typically shellfish with crawfish and shrimp being two good choices and it is generally served over rice. The key to a good etouffee is definitely the roux and you want to cook the butter and flour for a good long time until it turns a deep golden brown before adding the veggies. Once the roux is done the rest of the recipe is nice and easy and absolutely worth the effort to make!
This is definitely one of those lick your plate clean dishes and the leftovers get even better the next day!
This shrimp etouffee is a great way to celebrate Mardi Gras!
Shrimp Etouffee
A cajun and creole dish of shrimp in a tasty roux gravy.
- 4 tablespoons butter
- 4 tablespoons flour (or rice flour)
- 1 pound shrimp, shelled and deviened
- 2 cups chicken broth
- 1 cup onion, diced
- 1/2 cup celery, diced
- 1/2 cup bell pepper, diced
- 4 cloves garlic, chopped
- 1 teaspoon thyme, chopped
- 1 cup tomato, diced
- 1 tablespoon creole seasoning
- 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
- hot sauce to taste
- salt and pepper to taste
- 2 tablespoons butter
- 2 tablespoons lemon juice (~1/2 lemon)
- 1/4 cup green onions, sliced
- 1/4 cup parsley, chopped
- Melt the butter in a large sauce pan over medium heat, cook until it starts to brown sprinkle in the flour while mixing and simmer, stirring frequently, until it turns a dark brown, about 10-20 minutes.
- Meanwhile, bring the shrimp shells and chicken broth to a boil, reduce the heat and simmer for 10 minutes before straining the solids from the broth and set aside.
- Add the onion, celery and peppers to the roux and cook until tender, about 8-10 minutes.
- Add the garlic and thyme and cook for a minute.
- Whisk in the broth, add the tomatoes, creole seasoning and Worcestershire sauce and simmer for 20 minutes.
- Add the shrimp and cook until cooked, about 5 minutes.
- Season with hot sauce, salt and pepper to taste.
- Mix in the butter, lemon juice, green onion and parsley and enjoy over cooked rice.
Slow Cooker: Implement step 1, optionally implement steps 2-4, place everything except the shrimp, butter, lemon juice, green onions and parsley in the slow cooker and cook on low for 6-10 hours or high for 2-4 hours before adding the shrimp and cooking for anouther 10 minutes and then mixing in the butter, lemon juice, green onions and parsley.
Shrimp Gumbo
Shrimp Creole
Cajun Red Beans and Rice
Shrimp and Roasted Corn Chowder
Shrimp Bisque
Shrimp Creole Soup with Bacon and Cheddar Dumplings
Cajun Sweet Potato Seafood Chowder
Cheddar Biscuits and Shrimp and Andouille Gravy
Cajun Shrimp and Andouille Cheese Dip
Steak in Creamy Cajun Shrimp Sauce (Surf and Turf)


text:
Tom Dixon Bio
Born in Sfax, Tunisia in 1959, to a French/Latvian mother and an English father, Tom Dixon moved to England at age four and spent his school years in London. He dropped out of Chelsea School of Art to play bass in the band Funkapolitan before teaching himself welding and going on to produce furniture.
Tom rose to prominence in the mid 1980's as "the talented untrained designer with a line in welded salvage furniture". He set up 'Space' as a creative think-tank and shop front for himself and other young designers. By the late 1980's, Tom Dixon's international reputation grew, he was approached by Italian furniture design company, Cappellini, for whom he desinged the Iconic "S" chair. In the 1990's, he became a household name and Jack, his polypropylene "sitting, stacking, lighting thing" designed for his own company Eurolounge was a symbol of the age.
Tom Dixon's appointment as Head of the UK design studio at the furniture retailer Habitat in 1998 was considered controversial. He came from a self-employed background instead of a corporate culture and was never considered "establishment". Tom Dixon led the company through its biggest makeover and quickly won recognition by becoming Head of International Design in 1999 and Creative Director in 2001. He was the public face of a collective team responsible for rejuvenating the Habitat brand, while maintaining Terence Conran's dream of enriching everyday life through simple, modern design and creating a shopping experience that is theatrical and intimate.
In 2000, Tom's work was recognized by the award of an OBE by Her Majesty The Queen. His works have also been acquired by the world's most famous museums and are now in permanent collections across the globe including Victoria and Albert Museum, Museums of Modern Art New York and Tokyo and Centre Beaubourg (Pompidou).
"Honestly, I can't remember ever holding an ambition to be a designer. It just slowly came over me as I rejected notions of being an artist or a craftsman. Even today I prefer the idea of being an industrialist." - Tom Dixon."