text:
2-13-2018 Employee Spotlight
- Details
- Posted in Uncategorised
- Tuesday, 13 February 2018 17:36
- by Rick Dollinger
- Hits: 6275
News Room Landing Page
- Details
- Posted in Uncategorised
- Tuesday, 06 February 2018 15:48
- by Rick Dollinger
- Hits: 1872
DM3D Enters Machine Building business with sale of DMD105D
- Details
- Posted in Uncategorised
- Tuesday, 26 September 2017 13:18
- by Rick Dollinger
- Hits: 14106
DM3D recently signed a collaboration agreement with a Chinese Tool & Die company, Jingjiang Sanpeng MouldTechnology Co., Ltd., and delivered its first commercial system to China to be used to repair tools using its DMD additive process.
Since its formation in 2013, DM3D Technology has focused primarily on commercial applications with large innovative companies using its proprietary AM process known as Direct Metal Deposition (DMD) which is a directed energy process using lasers and powdered metals to 3D print components or repair parts. DM3D builds additive machines for internal use within its AM service technology business model but is now marketing DMD machines to companies with AM needs using its direct metal deposition process.
Mr. Li, President of JJSP, stated that "China has many opportunities for the DMD process and hopes that this machine will be the first of many within the region and looks forward to working with DM3D more closely on commercial applications."
Employee Spotlight
- Details
- Posted in Uncategorised
- Monday, 05 February 2018 12:45
- by Rick Dollinger
- Hits: 1945
We at DM3D Technology take pride in the advanced technology and incomparable customer service we provide to our customers. We consistently go above and beyond to lavish our customers with a service or product that exceeds their expectation. That being said, none of that would be possible if it were not for the incredibly talented professionals that are part of the DM3D Family. We would like to thank them for being part of our team and spotlight their contributions that are made on a daily basis. Please click the date below to be introduced to some our our team:
2-13-2018 Employee Spotlight (Patrick Lauinger & Vijay Singh)
- Details
- Posted in Uncategorised
- Wednesday, 01 March 2017 15:04
- by Rick Dollinger
- Hits: 12368
As 3D Printing/Additive Manufacturing (AM) is emerging as a major manufacturing technology, production throughput and cost appears to be two major challenges between its wide scale acceptance in the industry and current niche technology status. As such, using 3D printing to manufacture original equipment products has not been feasible, particularly if the product includes a large volume. Some of the challenges for the technology are:
- Lower throughput compared to conventional processes such as casting, forging, etc.
- High manufacturing cost of 3D printing
- Cast microstructure is a limitation in many flight critical aerospace parts
TransFormAM SOLUTION
TransFormAM is a new approach to Additive Laser Manufacturing - a sophisticated process that builds CAD/CAM-enabled three-dimensional structures and geometry on top of existing metal pre-forms. These "pre-forms" can be made using traditional metal forming methods, such as forging, extrusion or roll forming. They serve as the base structure onto which our proprietary DMD technology is used to transform it into a fully functional metal part.
- Improved manufacturing throughput
- Easier fabrication of large parts
- Wrought microstructure of the preform will provide better quality to the finished part
- Reduced manufacturing risk
- Reduced cost of manufacturing for low volume production
- High value aerospace components, such as turbine casing, components, structural components, landing gears, etc.
- Oil & gas industry components
- Other industrial parts


text: Blog News on 6 – Tulsa Teen Chef Authors New Cookbook by tech A local Tulsa chef is out with a new book and it's already debuting big on Amazon. It's called the Healthy Teen Cookbook. Chef and author Remmi Smith stopped 6 In The Morning on Friday and showed how to make Honduran... Remmi Smith will publish her second cookbook in March by tech The then-14-year-old Remmi Smith published her first cookbook, "Global Cooking for Kids," as a way to teach kids how to make healthy and fun meals at home. The teen chef and entrepreneur, who has been busy working on Chef Club Box and competing on Food Network's... Tulsa Child Entrepreneur Raising Funds For Her New Business by tech Tulsa Child Entrepreneur Raising Funds For Her New Business TULSA, Oklahoma – Chef Remmi Smith is a Tulsa entrepreneur and founder of "Cook Time With Remmi." She's now raising money to advance... How to Cook Up the Perfect Meal, or the Perfect Business… by tech How to Cook Up the Perfect Meal, or the Perfect Business… Fourteen-year-old Remmi Smith hosts a health-based cooking show called "Cook Time with Remmi", as well as has her own popular blog. In the video below, Remmi offers a few tips for cooking up a delicious... Chef Remmi featured on PeerSpring by tech When I was 9 years old, I had a passion and I turned this passion to a business. In 2009, I created Cook Time with Remmi because of my love of food and love of helping other people. I created Cook Time with Remmi as a way to connect kids having fun in the kitchen,... Whose Dish is on the Chopping Block by tech Whose Dish is on the Chopping Block? My heart sank when I saw my own dessert revealed by Ted Allen. Despite the outcome, appearing on the Food Network's "Chopped" was and always will be one of the greatest experiences of my... Remmi appears on Business Rockstars TV series, airing on KDOC-TV / Los Angeles, Channel 56, and KUBE TV in Houston. by tech Remmington (Remmi) Smith – CEO & Co-Founder of Cook Time with Remmi TM, sits down with Mark Lack! Remmi started when she was 8 years old and hopes to end the child obesity epidemic. She is all about living the healthy lifestyle as well as getting other kids... An interview with Remmi Smith featured on Startup Savant by tech Remmi Smith is a Chinese-American teen entrepreneur. She is the co-founder of Cook Time with Remmi, a health based company for kids and families, and Chef Club Box, a subscription snack box service delivering healthy, on-the-go snacks each month. She first started in... Chef Remmi featured in Kids Nation Magazine by tech Money lessons for kids & Kidpreneurs World's first free digital magazine, dedicated to empowering kids around the world, with global contributors To learn more click... Chef Remmi featured on Harry T.V. by tech 16-year-old Remmi Smith began hosting an online cooking show at the age of 8. Today she has a salad dressing line, cookbook and a health-based subscription box service. To learn more click... Archives Archives Select Month April 2018 March 2018 November 2017 October 2017 June 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 March 2016 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 November 2013 October 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 January 2013 November 2012 October 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 April 2009 Remmi with Apple The Celebrity Chef Tweets by @CookTimeRemmi Preferred Speaker at

subset: commoncrawl


text:
|Department of Public Information • News and Media Division • New York
Press Conference on Maternal Health in United Republic of Tanzania
New York City Mayor and philanthropist Michael Bloomberg announced at Headquarters today a new investment in an innovative maternal health programme in the United Republic of Tanzania, saying it would impact at least 50,000 women and their children over the next three years.
At a news conference, Mr. Bloomberg said the programme focused on upgrading rural health facilities and training non-physicians, pointing out that despite progress in many areas of the Millennium Development Goals, the maternal-mortality target had lagged far behind. The United Republic of Tanzania's maternal death rate was so high that there was an enormous gap between it and that of the United States, he added.
The new investment pledged jointly by Bloomberg Philanthropies and the H&B Agerup Foundation, would bring the total commitment to $15.5 million since the programme's launch in 2006, said Mr. Bloomberg. Accompanying the Mayor were United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon, President Jakaya Kikwete of the United Republic of Tanzania and Helen Agerup, Chair of the partner institution.
"These three people are leading advocates in women's and children's health," said Mr. Ban, stressing the importance of advancing concrete partnerships on the ground as almost 300,000 women died around the globe from pregnancy and childbirth every year. The partnership between those three leaders alone had helped cut maternal deaths in the Kigoma, Morogoro and Pwani regions by roughly one third over two years, he said, noting that the national maternal mortality rate had been almost halved. " Tanzania is an example of how, by investing in the health of women and children, we can achieve great results for us all."
President Kikwete, expressing appreciation for the new $8 million investment, said maternal health was an issue "very close to my heart" and had become a priority of Government policy. Much had been done, and would continue to be done in reducing maternal deaths in the country and on the African continent, by the Government, multilateral institutions, private organizations and persons of good will, such as Mayor Bloomberg and Ms. Agerup, but there remained a need to scale up efforts because too many mothers and children were still dying or at risk of losing their lives.
He went on to say that 454 women per 100,000 childbirths had died in 2011, compared with 500 in sub-Saharan Africa and 210 globally. Infant mortality was 51 per 1,000 in the United Republic of Tanzania, 69 in sub-Saharan Africa and 7 globally. These numbers "speak volumes" of the need for more intervention, the President said, adding: "It's not fair for women to die by giving birth to another human being." Despite the availability of financial resources, technical skills and technology, there was a need to muster the necessary political will, said President Kikwete.
The programme funded by Mayor Bloomberg's philanthropic institution complemented his own Government's plan in rural areas, he continued, pointing out that it had trained more than 100 non-physicians to perform life-saving procedures, including caesarean sections. In the Ulanga District, maternal deaths had fallen by 32 per cent in just two years, he noted.
Mayor Bloomberg pointed out that Millennium Development Goal 5 called for a 75 per cent reduction in maternal-mortality rates by 2015, and the United Republic of Tanzania was not on track to meet that target. However, he commended the country's efforts in that regard, saying he realized how much of a difference honest, hard-working leadership could make. As a result, the use of health centres had risen from about 3,500 deliveries a year prior to the programme to about 9,000 in 2011, he said, expressing hope that the scheme would be replicated at the national level.
Ms. Agerup said she had travelled to the United Republic of Tanzania to see the programme first-hand before making a financial commitment, and had become convinced that it was unique, necessary and challenged the conventional approach. Not only had it produced results on the ground, it had the potential to have an impact on other African nations, she said.
Asked how much more funding would be needed to meet the maternal health-related Millennium Development Goal, President Kikwete said "we need more money for sure", citing such challenges as inadequate facilities, long-distance travel and a shortage of skilled personnel. The Government aimed to build and refurbish facilities and to lower the physician-to-patient ratio.
Mayor Bloomberg added that he intended to make a model of the programme for replication in other areas. "Our donations are just a beginning," he said.
* *** *


text:
2001 Peugeot 806 16v 2.0
Automatic can be tricky
Automatic transmission works nice until the oil gets very hot - city driving. Then it starts to go into 3rd and stays there. It doesn't shift properly from N to 1, or when stopping it jerks into N... The service says that some bearings have to be changed. 1000-1500€
When buying an automatic, keep in mind that with a higher mileage you'll have to make a full service on your auto trans as on manual. But a manual costs less; almost half less.
General Comments:
When I fix the auto transmission, I hope it will work properly.
Would you buy another car from this manufacturer? Yes
Review Date: 11th January, 2009
11th Jan 2009, 09:52
"Automatic transmission works nice until the oil gets very hot - city driving."
- Get a transmission oil cooler. It's a radiator for the transmission.
21st Jun 2009, 06:54
I've repaired the fault. It was "only" 320€.
8th Oct 2013, 07:13
What is the solution to the hotness of the gear oil, where when it's hot, the car will not move faster, and if you are in a hold up, you will find it difficult to move the car?


text:
August 24, 2016
Mitek Acquires IDchecker for $10.6 Million
May 28, 2015
Mitek, the San Diego-based company that pioneered mobile check capture, on Tuesday revealed it has acquired authentication technology provider IDchecker for $10.6 million. The company, which just last week won the Customer Choice award for Best Mobile Solution at the 2015 CNP Awards , specializes in ID verification technology for payments and financial services companies. IDchecker's technology can combine ID authentication with facial recognition to confirm identities during mobile account opening and m-commerce transactions. Mitek said it will leverage the Dutch company to expand globally.
"Consumer preference for shopping and opening accounts via the mobile channel is not just a U.S. phenomenon – it is a rapidly growing worldwide trend," said James B. DeBello, president and CEO of Mitek. "This acquisition enables Mitek to provide ID capture and authentication to companies who operate in highly regulated markets around the world."
The $10.6 million price tag includes $5.85 million in cash, $2.75 million in Mitek stock and $2 million in additional Mitek shares contingent on the company hitting certain revenue targets. Michael Hagen, IDchecker's CEO, will join Mitek as managing director of IDchecker and corporate ID strategist.


text:
In addition to our standard product offerings, Tenrehte
provides a wide range of service offerings from product integration services, to
electronic product design and manufacturing services with a focus on clean and green
Product Integration Services
Our product integration services provide engineers with
the knowledge and skills to install, configure, and maintain our standard products. If
you do not have the time or the necessary resources to perform this work, one of our
engineers is available to assist you. In addition, if you desire to fully integrate one
of our standard products into your product offering, including purchasing our standard
products on an OEM or white label basis, our engineers are ready to assist your
Product Design And Manufacturing Services
Tenrehte electronic product design and manufacturing services utilize our advanced design processes and best in class methodologies ensuring your products get to market faster. Design complexity and tight schedules force companies to examine all available options to reduce the risks involved in creating a product and managing all engineering activities in-house. Whether you desire to develop a leading-edge energy efficiency system, energy conservation device, or clean sheet design, technology experts at Tenrehte help customers cost-effectively and rapidly deliver their mission-critical product development plans. Our designers collaborate closely with customers to optimize their products without compromising performance, power consumption, cost, or schedule goals. Tenrehte also provides a range of risk mitigation options that span the entire range of engineering development and implementation of products at all engineering levels including system, board level, software, firmware, digital and analog signal processing, digital embedded controllers, and digital, custom, and mixed-signal integrated circuit design projects.


text:
One Direction's Liam Payne was left red-faced after meeting Victoria Beckham when she "recoiled" as he tried to kiss the Spice Girls star.
The heart-throb admits he made a fool of himself when he was introduced to Beckham in August (12) at the closing ceremony of the London Olympic Games, where both the Spice Girls and One Direction performed.
He tells Britain's The Sun, "It suddenly dawned on me as we were waiting to perform that I was sat in a maths class at school when it was announced that London was hosting the Games. Then suddenly we are up there singing to the stadium. I couldn't believe it. I met Victoria Beckham and tried to play it cool by giving her a kiss on both cheeks.
"She just recoiled a bit and looked shocked after the first kiss. I don't think she really wanted that kind of greeting. Louis Tomlinson from our band was stood next to me (laughing)."


text:
Skin Blossom Facial Cleansing Gel
Bentley Organic Skin Blossom make effective certified organic skin and hair care, without the high price tag.
Enriched with Almond oil and Ylang Ylang, this nutrient rich, creamy cleanser soothes away make-up and impurities, leaving skin soft and supple. It helps maintain skin's natural moisture balance for optimum comfort.
Soil Association certified and Vegan Society registered.
UK Standard delivery is £2.99. For UK orders £19.95 or over this is FREE.
All international orders are sent out through Fedex on a tracked service. Postage zones out with the UK are split into the following 4 zones:
Zone 1 Delivery is £15. (Andorra, Austria, Belgium, Denmark, Faroe Islands, Finland, France, Germany, Greece, Greenland, Ireland, Italy, Luxembourg, Monaco, Netherlands, Portugal, Spain & Sweden)
Zone 2 Delivery is £20. (Canada, Gibraltar, Iceland, Norway, Switzerland & USA)
Zone 3 Delivery is £25. (Albania, Bulgaria, China, Croatia, Cyprus, Czech Republic, Estonia, Hong Kong, Hungary, Japan, Latvia, Lithuania, Macedonia, Malta, Malaysia, Poland, Romania, Serbia, Singapore, Slovakia, Slovenia, Turkey & Ukraine)
Zone 4 Delivery is £30. (Antigua & Barbuda, Azerbaijan, Bahamas, Barbados, Bermuda & Seychelles)


text:
Combine the orange and lemon juice, bay leaves, crushed lemongrass, star anise, molasses, soy, chili, garlic and ginger and marinate the quail for several hours, or overnight, covered, in the refrigerator.
To make the dressing for the salad, combine the mustard, vinegar and honey and whisk in the olive oil to create an emulsion.
Remove the quail from the marinade and grill over an outdoor barbecue for 4 to 5 minutes on each side, or cook over medium heat in a cast iron skillet for 10 to 12 minutes, turning frequently to avoid burning. Remove from the heat and let the quail rest for several minutes before serving.
Toss the salad greens with the dressing and divide among 4 plates. Top each salad with 2 quail for a main course and garnish each with several slices of papaya and mango and sprinkle with toasted pumpkin seeds.
Copyright Michael Lomonaco 1997
Check Out Our
Get a sneak-peek of the new Food Network recipe page and give us your feedback.See it Now!


text:
Town Clerk
Elections and Registrations
Mission Statement and Description of Services
The Stoneham Town Clerk's Office is committed to providing competent, courteous, and efficient service to all residents and non-residents alike while maintaining the integrity of the Office.
The Town Clerk is the chief election official, recording official, registrar of vital records (births, deaths and marriages), as well as, the public records official.
The Town Clerk's Office issues state licenses and permits, including marriage licenses, business licenses and renewals, dog licenses, fuel storage renewals, raffle/bazaar permits and requests for public documents.
The Town Clerk is responsible for all elections, census and voter registration as well as overseeing the polling place and the conduct of all elections and elected related activity. The Town Clerk records all actions of Town Meeting. The Town Clerk certifies all official actions of the Town, including town meeting legislation and appropriations.
The Town Clerk administers the oaths of office and maintains appointments and resignations of all Town Officials. The office responds to inquiries from the public as well as from other departments, boards and committees.
The Stoneham Town Clerk's Office (Elections and Registration) is a Passport Acceptance Agency for processing passport applications.
Passport Photos can be taken on site for $15.00
Staff Contacts
|Maria Sagarino
|Town Clerk
|(781) 279-2650
|Carolyn Auriemma
|Assistant Town Clerk
|(781) 279-2650
- 2012-2018 Election Results
- 2012-2018 Town Meeting Minutes
- 2017 Political Campaign Finance Reports
- 2017 Street List
- 2018 Political Campaign Finance Reports
- Absentee Voting Information
- Fee Schedule
- Mail-In Birth Certificate Request
- Mail-In Business Certificate Form
- Mail-In Death Certificate Request
- Mail-In Dog License Form
- Mail-In Marriage Certificate Request
- Mail-In Voter Registration Form
- Marriage License Requirements
- On Line Ordering for Birth, Death, Marriage Certificates
- Open Meeting Law
- Physician Registration Form
- Public Records Law Information
- Raffle and Bazaar Permits
- Town Code
- Town Meetings On Demand
- Town of Stoneham Parking Regulations
- Vital Records
- Voter Precinct Map
- Zoning Map
Contact Info
(781) 279-2650
(781) 279-2653


text:
The hilariously named Swedish singer-songwriter Sarah Assbring, who understandably records as El Perro Del Mar, has already released a couple of albums of lush, downcast indie-pop. So the new El Perro Del Mar track "What Do You Expect" comes as something of a surprise. It's a tense, stripped-back electronic track with shades of dubstep and precious little actual singing, and it seems to address the recent London riots. Listen below.
El Perro Del Mar's new album Pale Fire is due next year.


text:
"A growth of approximately 23% has been witnessed in the injectables for rheumatic diseases", says RNCOS Research.
Noida, UP -- (SBWIRE) -- 05/23/2014 -- Growing prevalence of chronic diseases including diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis significantly provides opportunities for growth of injectable market across UK. High demand of drugs for such diseases has provided immense opportunities to players to create their foothold in this injectable business. Moreover, giant pharmaceutical players have been competing with small pharma companies to maintain their share. Even scientists have been involved in promising research for providing novel injectables for rheumatoid arthritis. For example: a new injectable Mavrilimumab has come up with promising phase II trial for treating arthritis.
Rising number of rheumatic diseases is all due to increasing ageing population across the country. Prevalence for the disease is more in women by men by a ratio of 3:1. This increasing prevalence of rheumatic arthritis throughout UK hailed the use of more and more drugs for treatment of the disease. However in comparison to other application areas approximately 23% of growth in injectables for Rheumatic diseases has been witnessed which would expectedly increase the advancements of the injectables for rheumatic diseases in UK. Eventually the scientists have been involved in development of promising treatment option for the disease. Moreover, the country's government has been continuously investing to improve the patient care for rheumatic diseases. For instance, recently NHS has funded approximately £ 120 Million to boost the services for rheumatoid arthritis patients.
The report, "UK Injectables Market Outlook to 2017", is spread across 40 pages provides an in-depth research and rational analysis of injectable drugs sold in UK. On account of our analysis of the past and present prevalence statistics for major indications and private sector developments, forecast for injectable market have been drawn. Our research clearly depicts the historic, current, and expected revenue trend analysis across the country, market size of injectable market in the country and of course, the key drivers and restraints encompassing the Injectable drug market. Government initiatives to boost injectable drug business have also been studied. In order to understand the competition, we have profiled key players covering their business overview and product portfolios. Strategies adopted by key market players are also included in the report to give a pragmatic market insight to the investors and stakeholders.
For FREE SAMPLE of this report visit: http://www.rncos.com/Report/IM634.htm
Check Related REPORTS on: http://www.rncos.com/Healthcare_Industry.htm
About RNCOS
RNCOS is a leading industry research and consultancy firm incorporated in 2002. As a pioneer in syndicate market research, our vision is to be a global leader in the industry research space by providing research reports and actionable insights to companies across a range of industries such as Healthcare, IT and Telecom and Retail etc. We offer comprehensive industry research studies, bespoke research and consultancy services to Fortune 1000, Trade associations, and Government agencies worldwide.


text:
Freshen up Your Beauty Routine in Time for Spring
Freshen up Your Beauty Routine in Time for Spring
By Shana Aborn
Freshen up your beauty routine in time for spring! Finally! After a long, cold, miserable winter, spring never felt so welcome. You're eager to swap out sweaters for sandals, but don't forget that spring is also the time to switch up your beauty routine. These expert tips will ensure that your skin and hair are ready to face the warm springtime sun.
Make Your Skin Shine
Once daily, exfoliate your face gently with a washcloth or sonic facial brush to help dead skin slough off. Then weekly, follow up with a toner containing glycolic or salicylic acid, which gives a deeper clean. "I'm a big fan of exfoliation," says New York dermatologist Dr. Debra Jaliman, author of Skin Rules. "If your skin isn't exfoliated, it won't have that nice glow." You'll also want to put away your extra-strength body lotion and switch to a lighter formulation.
Say Goodbye to Pimples


text:
CNET Top 5
Tech gifts under $100Our favorite surefire tech gifts that are also a great value.
Ten years ago, in 2003, one of the hottest holiday tech gifts was the newly PC-compatible touch wheel Apple iPod. It cost $400. We take it for granted, but these days there are so many amazing gadgets that can be had for so little. So to remind you, today IÃ?m counting down five slam dunk tech gifts that can be had for under $100, all pulled from CNETÃ?s Holiday Gift Guide. Starting off at #5: headphones. I love these as a gift idea. As a cheapskate, I know how hard it is to spend more than $30 or $40 on headphones for yourself. ThatÃ?s what makes it such a treat to get a nice pair from someone else. For style, try the V-Moda Remix Remote. For sound, the Klipsch Image S4i II. Or for comfort, try the Audio-Technica ATH-M30. At #4: a Universal Remote. Bring some order to the chaotic orgy or remotes in your living room. The Logitech Harmony 650 has been a favorite of ours for a few years now. Easy to program, easy to use, and the color screen will inspire tech envy in anyone who comes over. At #3: Fitness Trackers. Now, in full disclosure, I also put these on my infamous list of the Top 5 Worst Holiday Tech Gifts. ItÃ?s a thorny product category. Great choice for someone whoÃ?s already athletic, a jogger, biker, competitive miniature golfer. But if my wife gave one of these to me, I would just take it as an expensive insult. That said, there are some exceptionally cool products out there, like the Fitbit Flex or Withings Pulse. For the right person, these are a slam dunk. For the more sedentary intellectual, try #2: E-book Readers. ThereÃ?s a reason that tablet sales havenÃ?t killed the traditional e-ink ebook reader: theyÃ?re awesome. The have outstanding battery life, theyÃ?re practically indestructible, their screens have no glare, and they weigh almost nothing. TheyÃ?ve also never been better or less expensive. The lowest tier Kindle is just $69. For $10 more, you could go with a Nook Simple Touch. And unlike the FitBit, no one gets insulted when you assume they enjoy reading. But if you want the real homerun gift for under $100, here you go. At #1: a media streamer. ThatÃ?s the boring way to say an Apple TV or a Roku 3. Both will bring you right up to that $100 limit, but itÃ?s a lot of bang for your buck. The Roku arguably has the best set of features, but if your house is filled mostly with iPhones and iPads, the Apple is the clear way to go. Either way, itÃ?s never been easier to rent movies, stream Netflix, or call up some great music from the comfort of your couch. And because letÃ?s be honest, youÃ?re not going to Blockbuster anymore. So there you go, five great tech gifts for under $100. For more expert recommendations head over to holiday.cnet.com to see our full Gift Guide, which includes gifts under $50. IÃ?m Donald Bell, thanks for watching.


text:
NIMDTA believe that NI Medical and Dental trainees should be VALUED. We strive to ensure that trainees are listened to, supported and provided with high quality training opportunities. This has led to the development of a VALUED strategy, to ensure that:
Voice is listened to
Applaud & acclaim success
Life-work balance
Up to date & high quality training
Enhanced learning opportunities
The Strategy can be viewed by clicking on the images below:
Medical Strategy
Dental Strategy
Over 20 initiatives have already been developed under this strategy, and NIMDTA plans to work with trainees, trainers, Trusts and other organisations to continue to develop practical ways to ensure that trainees are Valued.
Find out more by watching the short VALUED animation and exploring the links below.


text:
tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-70680937087168867362018-05-29T14:27:50.032+08:00Navel GazingNavel: a depression in the middle of the abdomen that marks the point of former attachment of the umbilical cord to the embryo called also umbilicus; Gazing: to look steadily and intently, as with great curiosity, interest, pleasure, or wonder.Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-21615828203700086622009-12-26T18:02:00.002+08:002009-12-26T18:07:20.670+08:00Two Deaths in Silence

We have a friend who is dying. It was sudden. There he was entertaining us, fake punching us, there he was passing out the cards, or ordering the eighth beer tower between the three of us while we're puking our guts out on the floor.

Now he is lying on the bed comatose. Distant, unreachable.

We are sitting on opposite sides of his death bed. Sometimes we glance at each other, hesitantly, never knowing what to expect.

I feel like telling them. The one dying. The one living.

That she has left. That my heart and soul has been ripped asunder. That there is a void in the centre of me so large, so massive, so powerful that it feels like everything might fall in.

But I cannot speak it. It would feel like a mockery.

To speak of living death before the dying.

We both of us die in the still tense silence.
Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-91505132589076949982009-12-18T11:20:00.001+08:002009-12-18T11:23:00.849+08:00New Nike Ad

 art harunhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-29459383957992580482009-11-03T21:52:00.005+08:002009-11-03T22:26:44.673+08:00Manners and Murder
They say manners are a good thing. Manners bring polish and politeness. These in turn bring amiability. And that is useful to lure good fortune and seal favours. People generally like those that possess if not inhabit manners.

But manners prevent me from the sayings the things I need to say. I cannot call you a fucking murderer. I cannot accuse you of being a slimy scum sucking ball licking piece of shit. No. Manners demand that we respectfully dance around the massive gargoyle in the room that whose upper body has crashed through the ceiling and the pieces are raining down on us. It demands that we presume a person so unworthy of humanity to have a good reputation. The more loathsome the person, the higher their presumed reputation. So even though everybody knows what you did, we have to smile and pretend it didn't happen. 1984 in 2009.

Manners demand I politely remark in the words utterly devoid of emotion of your impropriety. We can only accuse you of that when you have betrayed and ruined us and still hold our beating hearts in your hand. Manners demand a considered and reasoned reaction to your intended madness when I want to choke the living shit out of you with my bare hands. Manners forces my mouth when my fingers want to dig into the softness of your neck and rip out your spine by tearing off your head. Manners forces a handshake when my hands wants to murder your entire family in front of you while you lay dying as you have done to so thoughtlessly to many others. So the last thing you are able to comprehend as you fade is your complete annihilation. So that when you are faced with death, you will long for it. And when you finally beg for it, pray for it, long for it like a fresh love denied, I want to keep you alive. But only just enough for you to comprehend you are living death.

And maybe after that, perhaps we can use manners a smidgen more meaningfully.
Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-47971884680059333612009-10-30T21:33:00.000+08:002009-10-30T21:33:00.583+08:00Solitary Walk

It is a pleasant thing sometimes to walk alone incognito in sprawling deteriorating and decrepit streets.

Nobody to wait for. Nobody to catch up.

To look at those dirty chipped walls sometimes stained with beautifully unappreciated art. To see the rats quickly dash by as if we couldn't notice it. It need not worry. We are mutually indifferent.

There is more life in the areas of developmental entropy. There are flies, mosquitoes, cockroaches as there are weeds, little flowers that struggle up from the cracks of broken undulating concrete.

Last night I walked past a scrawny wrinkled who looked too old with a child sleeping in her lap. His head was on where her thigh should be. His legs dangled from her other thigh. She had called out to me from the darkness. The bowl in front of her sat empty. Symbolic more than useful.

I didn't know what she said in her foreign language. But I understood. Completely.

She played on my mind even as I walked on. Even though I didn't see her clearly, she weighed so heavily on me. Eventually I returned and pressed more than I usually did into her hand. I felt the wiry thinness of her fingers clumsily grabbing the money from my fingers as if afraid I would change my mind.

At the least it should spare her a day off the streets and a decent meal.

So why did I feel worse after that act of charity?
Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-11654266020557679152009-10-29T20:44:00.004+08:002009-10-29T21:03:31.589+08:00The Morning Assembly

The morning sun cast glowing yet cool shafts of light through the thick clouds, softening the edges of everything it touched. The dew still hung precariously on the edges of the flowers and leaves. The birds had not finished their song nor the butterflies their dance.

King Baloo was already standing on the pavilion with Prince Balroukh on his right perched above a massive armoured war elephant, which stood at least a head taller than the largest in the platoon. A golden aura glowed from the many fine gold threads carefully laid their breastplate and sewn into their fine splendid garments.

Before them not too far away were the prisoners they had captured after a 10 year battle with Tuk'aranth. They were hemmed into an irregular rectangular crowd that stretched into the horizon by the row of soldiers on both their sides. They were bloody, filthy, ragged and yet despite their misery there was not a sound from any of them or the soldiers. Silently the stood. All the eyes in the crowd were riveted to the two glowing figures they could barely make out, even those at the front of the crowd.

The commander after what seemed an eternity of silence turned to King Baloo and said, 'Your Magnificence, they are ready.' After King Baloo acknowledged him and the commander returned his gaze to the crowd.

King Baloo turned to the mass of bodies before him and finally turned to the Prince touching hi

m on his left shoulder.

'The time has come, my son,' he said gravely.

Prince Balroukh turned to him with a searching look. And King Baloo saw the silhouette of his head mirrored in his son's eyes.
Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-76224224693020698222009-09-17T12:18:00.001+08:002009-09-17T12:19:48.360+08:00u need MEGA panadol

 art harunhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-57093159190745923272009-06-06T21:21:00.000+08:002009-06-06T21:21:00.134+08:00Before the Crash
 Phuket, Thailand

January 2007

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-74042655993491042792009-06-04T21:01:00.002+08:002009-06-04T21:07:03.247+08:00Muzium Negara Bersifat Subversif!

Sign to Gallery D

Muzium Negara, Kuala Lumpur

26 January 2009
Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-90365248299665694212009-05-11T21:04:00.003+08:002009-05-11T21:17:17.355+08:00Flesh and Blood

Only a thin veil of flesh
divides this earth from the evil within
wrapped by a thin plastic film of rationality
and perhaps good even

But it's there

The blood coursing through these veins
animate
manifest
my murderous malignant intent
Can you feel my evil when I smile and shake your hand?

it's there
it's there
it's there

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-19119299900393821232009-04-21T00:22:00.009+08:002009-04-21T08:14:40.865+08:00Oh porn, why doth thou beckon?
An example of porn

When I think about it I just don't get porn. Perhaps porn should just be seen and heard but not thought about in much depth. After all, porn movies rarely demand much, or if any, intellectual rigour or emotional depth. The plot is usually easy to follow that even our local politicians can understand them in one sitting, or may even have acted out some of them out themselves unknowingly, of course. And like the usual Hollywood summer blockbusters, we all know who is whom, whom does what to whom and how it ends. Yes, there are some variations in terms of where the limbs are placed, or whether one is standing, kneeling, on all fours or lying down but when you come down to it, there are just two main working components with a straightforward two stroke motion. Forward. Backward. Isn't it strange the amount of complexity people go through to seek for such an embrace in such a manner as pleasurable (generally anyway, Navel Gazing recognizes that there are occasional performances so dismal in quality that it would have been better for both participants to have not engaged in the act) as it is simple?

So we can understand the act itself and the reasons for doing so. (And if you don't please stop reading the rest of this article immediately. Read only what is in within these brackets. If you stay in here, you will be safe. Now, very slowly, press the reset button. Keep your eyes on the words in these brackets. Got it? Good.) Now that we've got rid of those fellas, as I was about to pose a question rhetorically, why do we enjoy porn, or in another way, watching other people copulating?

We are not engaged in the act with them. We do not know them. And they are not performing it live in front of us, it's recorded. In an immediate sense the performers don't care what we think. In most cases we will never meet them. It's not as if we haven't done it before, or done it in that fashion, or know how it feels. What is more they could make us feel inferior with their better bodies, better looks (okay, maybe not for most of the guys), better staying power, and are skilled at their craft to do some fonky positions like the verticle 69 and helicopter (novelty factor: 10 cool factor: 0). We are also less likely to perform the act in heels, with a bowtie around our neck, or crotchless underwear in a room filled with other people. The loudness of the moans would usually be less because we are embarassed if other people hear us having sex (what's so bad about hearing other people having a good time? Enjoy it like you would good news off the radio-ish, unless of course their dirty talk sounds up like some filthy DJ banter then turn the volume down. They are, after all, not there to talk). Our facial expressions would more likelier be less intense and pained looking than those on screen because we are not performing for people we would never meet and need to impress them with the intensity of our performance.

So what is it really? Why ah?

I mean aside from the fact that it's nice to watch every now and again in reasonable doses.
Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-7704477665550928522009-04-15T17:15:00.002+08:002009-04-15T17:21:06.541+08:00Dali-nesquewas walking along Lonely Lane
saw venus north of the sky
smiling and shining ever so bright
heard the owl laughing loudly

hey nightghost what's so funny

guitarman , you are the funny one

venus ain't smiling she's grinning
ask the sun he'll tell ya…

the water rippled in the River Faith
thought the sun was rising early

but it was just the water boiling hot

saw the moon she was crying

at a base of a tree a squirrel somersaulted

the owl flew above my head

seek the sun coz he knows all
he shines on both venus and the moon

as i turned to Hurtful Avenue

i saw a thousand souls

making calls on their cell phones

the joke is on you guitarman

and the sun ain't gonna tell ya…

nothin'!

050307/10:45am
art harunhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-38091345971683233852009-04-07T00:03:00.001+08:002009-04-07T00:27:07.578+08:00On the OutsideIt's cold and lonely where I am.

On the outside looking in.

In a white out blizzard.

I cannot see.

So I press my face as closely as I can to the window but taking care not to break it.

From what I can make out and guess from what is spared by the web of ice covering the glass, I can see the main door which opens into the living room. There is a warm comfortable glow about the room. Two big and deep cushioned recliner chairs glance at each other in front of what could be a lively cackling fire. A huge tan brown bear rug on the dark brown stained wooden floor lay between the recliners and the fire. Behind the recliners is an oval shaped table with a few chairs around it. On top of it is a black suitcase with what looks like silver or white gold tasteful but understated trimmings. A pair of thin round shaped spectacles rests overturned on top of the suitcase. Then I see a man and a woman walk into the room happily talking to each other as the walk towards the fireplace. After sitting on the recliners and chatting for a while they end up making love on the bear where they fell asleep in each other's arms.

It looks how it has always been. It is pleasant to remember what was.

But I no longer hunger for it now. So I turn away from the scene.

The web of ice quickly creeps over, freezing me out.

As I close my eyes in readiness to welcome and passionately embrace the piercing cold once more, a smile slowly creeps into the opposite edges of my lips.

Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-63037459640557320412009-03-31T11:01:00.002+08:002009-04-03T09:22:58.191+08:00Proton is diversifying into car accessories.
Tuesday 31st March:

In an announcement made yesterday, Proton MD proudly announced that the national car manufacturer is diversifying into the huge car accessories market which is as yet untapped on a large scale by car manufacturers. The Proton MD confessed that a walk around Sunway one day had inspired him to suggest to the Proton management to take a plunge into this market.

"I was walking around Sunway one day and I was awestruck by how lively the auto aftermarket products scene is. There are tonnes of people modifying their cars with aftermarket products. The place is littered with turbos, superchargers, stickers and what have you. The people just like to personalise their cars, be it the engine, for more power or the body, for a distinctive look," enthused the Proton MD. "Of course, Proton is not going to manufacture turbo chargers, super chargers, exhaust pipes or aftermarket pistons, conrods and the likes, not as yet. We will start with body kits."

For a start, a new subsidiary company called Proton Body Kit (PRO-BOD) has been established. "We are starting with some nice body kits for upmarket cars like BMW and Mercedez. That is because the owners of these cars would have the means to purchase these nice upmarket kits."

"We believe PRO-BOD will take the aftermarket scene by storm. This will also ensure Proton's ability to ride out the current economic meltdown,", said he.

The PRO-BOD's Brabust Body Kit Series. Only for serious enthusiasts.
art harunhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-85896780946562555552009-02-25T21:30:00.019+08:002009-02-25T22:57:28.594+08:00The Economy: A Stimulating Idiot's Guide (Reloaded)
Art originally wrote this piece which is published at Articulations and Loyarburok. We thought of putting it up again here with the pictures he actually wanted to use. I volunteered to undertake this. In return he graciously permitted me to '[f]eel free to re-write whatever is deemed fit and necessary.' So with this license, I thought I'd try doing something I've been wanting to try out: an Art/Daef collab. So here is the piece, reloaded! We hopes you enjoying its.

So, we're supposed to be insulated from the global economic meltdown like a turgid penis fully sheathed in a skin tight condom with the little tip flopping about impotently at the end. Like, uh, awesome dood! When countries with bigger metaphorical penises like America, Japan and Germans suffering economic-tile dysfunction so badly they're almost diagnosed as koro, we on our mishapen penile peninsular named Malaysia smiled like a pimp after his hoes turned good tricks all night. When the biggest economies were foretelling complete and utter financial disaster, our guys are telling us that you, me, and yeah you too, that we would be insulated because of our "diversified economy and strong foundations". Not only that dood. We not just gonna maintain our hard on, but we gonna grow it even bigger and better... 4.5% of penile growth they proclaimed. Forgetting that even with the condom on, their balls are still exposed.

Despite trenchant criticism from sounder economists that our Finance Ministry is living in Najibland, we are also insulated because of the wide spread mental therapy our Home Ministry has implemented known as 'Repeat Therapy'. Unfortunately, it does not apply to sex. For the virginal, Repeat Therapy is a process where we convince ourselves of the truth of something by repeating it until we cannot think of anything else. We have one of its most profound practitioners of this mind techonology with our beloved outgoing Prime Minister, the inimitable Dato' Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi. Remember when he repeatedly said "I am in control" as he was being shoved out the party? Or when he repeatedly chanted "I will be fair" when he was at best only in skin colour? Or in those private moments when he whispers consolingly to himself repeatedly, 'I know what I'm doing.' before falling asleep soundly. Stuff like that. So let's do the Badawi and keep chanting (unless you are Muslim then you can only chant in Arabic, because then it doesn't count as chanting even though it really is) 'Malaysia's economy is insulated' as our nuts hang out for the global financial epidemic to wipe it clean off.

The truth is the world economy is bad, getting worse and going to hit us like one big bad fiery meteor from hell up the arse. Check this. The International Labour Organisation projects that 23 million people are going to lose their jobs in Asia this year! (see here) 1% of that is 230,000. Even if Malaysia "contributes" 0.5% of that, it would mean 115,000 Malaysians would lose their job! Insulated? Like a condom with the head ripped off more like. And what about the approximately 300,000 Malaysians crazy enough to work in Singapore? If even 10% of them are retrenched, that means 30,000 people without jobs.

Now factor in the reduction of working days due to production cut-off, cancellation of over-time, forced holidays, compulsory masturbation and the freeze on bonus and salary increass; has our government given any thought what the cumulative effect of all that would do to our economy?

Condom with the head ripped off? Na'ah. 4.5% GDP growth? Ha ha. More like A bulldog ran over and slashed at our nuts and ripped off our no longer turgid penises with one savage yank (no I don't mean American). Just recently, Citibank Group forecasted that our GDP will in fact shrink to -1.5% this year! Economic koro dood. The big R. The Mama Kahuna. But remember what Abdullah Ahmad Badawi and Nor Mohamad said earlier this year? No. We will not be in a recession. We will do fine. We will grow wings and halos will appear on our head as our genitals grow larger and wider. So repeat after them and it will be alright, okay?

The numbers are creeping out now. Malaysia's export has shrunk. In December 2008 alone, our export shrunk to 46 billion ringgit, which represents a 14.9% decline year on year (see here). Our biggest trading partner, America, is in a financial black hole. Japan, our traditional trading partner is seeing their consumer index dipping southward at an alarming rate. And we are insulated. Roight. The only guy who can probably pull insulated off in such an environment is David Copperfield but it's a shame he didn't do finance and economics.

So let's discuss economics in easy to understand terms. We want to use terms that can reach both the lowest and highest common denominator.

Lesson One: The Economy is Like a Set of Tits<o:p></o:p>

God, aren't those awesome. Uh, where were we? Oh yeah. Tits. Big ones. We think we like 'em big. Because big means more and in this age of capitalism, bigger always means better. But the thing is, tits are generally not naturally big. Well, most of the time, that is. To make the economy big, we would have to do something to it like if we wanted to make a pair of tits firmer. We gotta stroke it, love it, want it. But they definitely ain't getting firmer or bigger just by staring hard at them. Plus, it's rude to stare you know.

No. That wouldn't do. We have to bring them to the operating table, cut them open and inject silicon to prop them up so that their nipples start pointing skyward and stitch 'em back discreet.ly Then they will be big. But no, we cannot just do that. That would be wrong.

We at Navel Gazing will always examine our subject matter thoroughly first. From this extensive examination, we can then determine what is wrong, or not quite right with them. Then after a shag or two, we go to the drawing board and plan. We would have to imagine then start sketching out modestly the kind of tits that we crave or may need. We cannot just make do with any old tits which are big. And we certainly cannot be mechanical about it by either injecting and injecting until the nipples start staring back at the owner or stimulate, stimulate and stimulate until the nipples get sore. If we did that, we'd have Frankenstein tits - monstrous, ugly and totally useless because they are so frightening!

Lesson Two: The Economy, Like Tits, Must be Proportionate

Just because big is good, don't think that the bigger they are, the better they will be. That is why China had to actually control its economics growth. They try to control growth around 8-10%. Sometimes it exceeds to 11%. But there must be control. Why? Because if we do not control the growth, the economy would grow too fast and a bubble effect would ensue. The bubble then, when it is too big, like tits, would burst! When it burst, it would ruin the hard on, dooood.

Lesson Three: Look at the Whole Body, Not Just the Tits<o:p></o:p>

This is very important. Just imagine a 36FF on a 4'8" body with big hair. Whoa nelly!

So just like a woman's hawt body, the economy must be looked at as a whole. Not in selective spots here, there if not everywhere. We have micro economics and macro economics. Both must compliment each other the way our respective reproductive functions of both sexes do. Micro policies must be optimised to support the macro ones, like the various limbs and body work to support the breasts.

Which brings us to our next point. The economy does not exist in a vacuum. It is but one element in a bigger circle consisting of the society and the international community. And in that respect, politics plays an important role into the equation. Hence the economy cannot be detached from its direct impact on social and political life, or as we would happily argue sexual life! When planning the economy thoughts must be given to its societal impact.

What for instance are we going to do about the people who lose their jobs? What about retraining? What about creating small business opportunities? Or new job skills? And have we thought of the rising criminal activities which are induced by economics uncertainties or difficulties? What about health problems afflicting the people due to the economics downturn? What about health care system? Are we going to sacrifice educations in favour of a quick financial gain elsewhere? And what are we going to do when all these turmoils are over? Back to the same old game? Or new games? If it is the latter, do we need new rules and regulations? Are we going to diversify in something else? New and uncharted economics territory?

Lesson Four: Stimulations Must be Total<o:p></o:p>

Don't just concentrate on the nipples! Just as a woman needs to be pleasured thoroughly and completely before she hits a multiple orgasm, those so called stimulus packages should be spread throughout the various economic sectors. They certainly should not be targetted solely at heavily politically connected industries like the construction industry. Just recently we heard that Road Builders (a subsidiary of IJM) was awarded the extensions of a road by 12 kilometers immediately after the concession of the toll road it operates expires! Hmmm... one expires and another one springs to life. Like an irrepresible hard on. Interesting.

Anyway, as we were saying, the stimulus plan must be wide ranging and holistic in nature. It mustn't be a stop gap measure. That's like being able to obtain a hard on easily but then suffering acutely from pre-mature ejaculation. Little point in it. Stimulation must have direction and work towards a goal, and must not be spaced too far apart. You just don't warm up the breasts only to go off for an hour and then come back for the main course. The economy just doesn't work like that. The fact that we have to announce a second stimulus just about 4 months after the first one shows that the first one was insufficient and not sufficiently thought out. We do not want a 3rd stimulus after this. Or a 4th one. There must be one holistic stimulus. Have we ever heard China launching a second stimulus in 4 months? Or Germany? Or wherever? Oh wait, maybe Chad... oh wait, they don't give a shit.

Our Government has a bad habit of introducing stop gap measures. While these may seem good at first, problems will continue to arise like a nasty ex-gf you just cannot get rid off. Any stimulus package must appreciate all angles. In particular, it must address all the issues raised in Lesson Three above. If not it is more useless than stimulus. And that is so not the very cool, dooood.

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-81732155997973972882009-02-19T23:43:00.001+08:002009-02-19T23:45:12.207+08:00Thought of the MinuteWhen faced with annihilation, relief is found in sweet, transient oblivions. Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-57107701627081100672009-02-19T17:10:00.001+08:002009-02-19T17:12:02.394+08:00in line six...

 art harunhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-2570593647113717472009-02-13T07:00:00.000+08:002009-02-13T10:20:34.771+08:00What kinda man are you?

And your choices are: tits, ass or leg.

As if women could only be served up in three pre-packed choices like supermarket chicken, only without the shrinkwrap and foam bottom. But I suppose those choices tend to be the primary ones because they are the most visual ones. And the theory for the moment is that us men, on average, tend to be more visual than women in their sexuality, supposedly because we are wired different. This I think is reflected in the quality of porn men and women enjoy.

What we know as porn - everybody's shaved smooth, perfectly proportioned (all the guys are huge cocked and the women with at least Cs, a fine looking ass and shapey legs that look great in heels), minimal story line (oh no, I have no money to pay you with. Maybe ...), the focus is mostly on the woman (there she's enjoying going down on him, now she's riding him cowgirl, now reverse cowgirl, her face close up showing her what I call overmoaning) or the scene of penetration (close ups of the mechanics from the standard set of angles), alternating between the two with an occasional five to ten second shot of the guy either with his eyes tightly shut and mouth wide open or silently repeating some phrase that definitely has the word 'fuck' 'yeah' and 'baby' in it or with his aggressive look when he's going at her hard and fast asking her whether she enjoys it that way. All that. That's the kind of porn men generally enjoy.

Women, or those that I happened to know (or perhaps I don't know enough!), generally don't tend to get into that (unless of course they are extremely horny at the time, then you can put on Tom and Jerry and still get it on). For them, the problem with male porn is there is no interesting plausible well thought out story that is borne out by an excellent cast of well acted characters. There is no artworthy demand made of the actors other than to coo, scream or hurriedly demand that they be fornicated, licked, sucked or sodomized in a harder and faster fashion, and so to them, that is not acting. They think its tacky to keep heels on whilst having sex in bed. They dislike how it usually ends. And would not like it in real life either.

So sometime in the 90's a new more auteur generation of porn film makers looked towards catering to the women's market. So now women don't buy porn. They buy erotica. That's made for women porn. It's more focused on the characters as people, they have motivations, there's a story, the sex scenes are more tastefully done - they are shot softer, with decent music, more shots of the couple together, better looking guys, and with less intensity and frequency on the shots of the scene of penetration, and focus more on the, you got it, foreplay.

Or maybe it's because it keeps with our simple lifestyle we simplify our choices: T A L.

But that's the problem with simplicity sometimes, its restrictive, confining, especially where it concerns women, these mysterious exquisite creatures capable of such mesmerising beauty and charming qualities. Yes, I concede that those areas tend to be the main thoroughfare, and yes sir, I can appreciate their visually aesthetic aspect but surely, surely, a lover of woman cannot be satisfied with just that immensely satisfying though it may be. Her entire body in the right circumstance can transform into a finely tuned instrument of a sexual passion (and maybe love!). Her entire physical being is open for exploration, experimentation, stimulation, emancipation and climax.

And there are many interesting less travelled routes and visited areas that possess their own particular charms and are worth more than a quick casual glance, in terms of popular culture. At the top and just behind her earlobe, the bottom of her earobe, the front of her neck where it meets her jaw, underneath her jaw, that cleft between her chin and the bottom of her lip, or the back of her neck, my glades of tranquility. Then there is her back, like a mesmerising vista of the changing unchanging ocean winking here and glittering there in the sunlight. So much to explore, to trace, and always, always too little time: the craggy region of her shoulders; the neglected, side from her chest to her hips; the length of her spine down past the small of her back til just a spasm into the vally of her ass; and both left and right sides of her back. Then there is delicious slide from the top of her ass down to her smooth slender calves. Or lingering at the peak of her toes. Or the back of the length of her arm. Or an unbroken straightline from her chest until the tip of her chin. Or the inner of her thighs. For example.

The best part is that there are many modes of transport down these neglected thought immense charming routes. One can travel by nose, lips, tongue, a single hair, side of the face, and of course, hands. They all yield different facets of the routes fascinating both for traveller and route every time. Heh. Which is why if someone asked me that question these days, I'd tell him. 'Journey man, son. I'm travelling all the time.'

(Puts on a dark grey fedora and breaks into a folk song on a guitar)

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-84928416054980472022009-01-29T14:11:00.001+08:002009-01-29T14:13:24.156+08:00The Journey
I have journeyed much. Much to realise that my journey is not as much a movement from a place to another as it is a struggle to change from one form to another; a shift from one position to another; a climb of one step to a step higher and a constant fight between one force against another. Now in this state of non-physicality, I know that I was created from the lowest element existing under my feet; the soil, the lowest element. After I have been shaped into physicality, into me was blown the highest form in Your creation, and beyond; Your spirit. I am therefore a mixture of the lowest and the highest; darkness and light; bad and good; evil and Godliness. Although it is obvious that I start from the lowest; the darkness; the badness and the evil. The journey is therefore the struggle to shift from the lowest element; the darkness, badness and the evil to the highest element; Your spirit. And only when I reach the highest form will I unite with Your spirit, giving me a glimpse of You and Your Greatness. And that would be my victory.
 art harunhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-5175117961888262472009-01-22T10:12:00.004+08:002009-01-22T13:06:25.590+08:00a pedant's first paragraph
It was a dark and stormy night. It was so dark, the darkness of which you would have never seen. But of course, come to think about it, one could never see darkness. Lest it would not be dark. Or dark enough. And the darkness of this particular night is one of those. It was a type of darkness that one could not even see one's palm even if one holds it up an inch from one's eyes. Really dark. Pitch black dark. And there was nary a ray of light. None. Absolutely none. Not a single teeny weeny bit of light anywhere. The sky was black. No star. No moon. Hence the total darkness that night. I did a test. I closed my eyes and then I opened them. It was the same. The sight was absolutely totally the same as when my eyes were closed and when they were opened. I could not see anything. It was that dark. But to say the sight was the same would imply that there was a sight or an ability to see. The truth was there was no sight at all. I could not see anything. Because the night was so dark. Pitch black dark. And it was stormy too. Well, not really a storm. No. Not really. It was raining heavily. And the wind was blowing. Not the kind of wind which would be classified as a storm. Just strong wind. The kind which would make the tree branches sway left and right, up and down. Not the kind which would cause the lamp posts to fly or the trees to be uprooted though. It was a strong wind. But not a particularly strong wind as to qualify it to be a storm. Stormy it might be. But definitely not a storm. The rain was heavy, although it was not the kind of rain which would cause a flood in a minute or two. Heavy. But not overly heavy. It wasn't really a storm then. It was just a heavy rain with a not particularly strong wind. In other word, it was a mild storm. Very mild storm. Thunders could be heard of and on from afar. And although the thunders were not particularly loud, the darkness of the night made them sound more pronounced that they actually were. In actual fact, they were not even sufficient to jolt me out of my sleep, if I were asleep. That kind of thunder. Occasionally, there would be lightning bolts. Which would light up the nights as and when it happened. Well then, it wasn't really a dark and stormy night. It was a dark night, littered with lightning bolts - which would illuminate the night with lights - and stormy, in a not very stormy way, night.

I had to leave the place fast. I walked briskly. Well, I was almost running actually. Not a sprint but.....
art harunhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-56004116088342795232009-01-15T10:56:00.004+08:002009-01-15T11:01:06.681+08:00co da.the fat lady took a bow
amidst screams for encores
bouquets were thrown about
as some hurriedly walked out

I took a walk along the Strand
candles in cardboard boxes
empty souls in winterland
lying down waiting for god

walked my way down to Soho
watched some gals in the nude
ended up in Hyde Park
where cold wintry winds
grabbed and squeezed my soul
a thousand shadows in dancing mood
oh, where were you my lady luck?
and why must the moon grin?

I thought I saw the fat lady
waving from a black cab
yeah she's finished singing
now it's just loneliness and me
with sadness on my lap
I am the heart break kingart harunhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-19957138512555525022009-01-12T20:45:00.002+08:002009-01-12T21:39:58.362+08:00Kung Fu Fighting (Part Fu)
How to Kick Someone Properry

Before Double M had fully erected himself upon standing up, Fu Yoh had launched himself into the air with his slim though powerful legs using the legendary Elephant Flying with Fire on Ass technique and spun the staff so quickly and masterfully above his head appearing momentarily like an early prototype of a machine to be created 500 years later known as the 'helicopter'. His clothes trembled and shook as he landed not five feet from where he landed stylishly with both feet solidly on the ground.

'Ah, so you know some kung fu,' chuckled Double M casually.

'I AM Kung Fu!' declared Fu Yoh angrily as he felt his chi building up around his points of power and struck the threatening Wounded Tiger Taking A Breather Before He Rips Your Face Off pose, his magnificent wooden staff held out in front of him. He could feel energy coursing into his arms down to his hands.

Double M stood unmoved though his grin grew broader until it was a shade short of being reasonably described psychotic.

'Kung Fu indeed. When I'm through with you, you'll be Kung Fool!'

'Yaaaaahhhh,' Fu Yoh screamed as he lept (Psychadelic Toad on Coke Jump) and dashed through the air, staff pointed resolutely at Double M's head, his feet running quickly on an ascending invisible stairs. Even as Fu Yoh rushed closer towards Double M, he made no move to deflect the blow. Suddenly, Fu Yoh felt worried even as he flew through the air. He could see the end of his staff almost touching Double M's head. Why was Double M not even moving? His gaze was fixed firmly on Fu Yoh's eyes and seemed to notice nothing else.

Suddenly his flight ended. Double M had caught the pointed end of his staff with his right palm and held it in place with Fu Yoh still clinging to the staff.

'It's time for you to meet the earth, little sparrow,' said Double M. When he flung the staff, Fu Yoh somersaulted on to the ground and struck the Tequila Grasshopper stance, both fists cackling with power. He rushed towards Double M and opened his attack with a wave of quick relentless punches known as the Thousand Kisses of Your Mother in Law an alternating it with a few Father In Law Loving Embrace long pull back punches. But Double M was not fazed; he met every blow with either a block or harmlessly redirected his punch.

Few could stand up to Fu Yoh's Parents in Law techniques, which usually brought a quick end to his fights. He learned it from his former wife's parents, who though were not trained showed remarkable natural ability. It was not his force that was deadly but his quickness. He could wear most opponent's down in several breaths because after a while they would not be able anticipate him. But Double M didn't even seem to break a sweat. And all the while his eyes were fixed on Fu Yoh's.

Then it happened. When Fu Yoh lost track of Double M's eyes and caught sight of his broad grin, it happened.

It was the blurred rushed haze. It was the feeling of an immovable object flying at great speed crashing into his chest and then another immovable object crashing into his right ribs so hard he heard a crack. It was him then flying through the air again on an entirely different trajectory not of his choosing. The grass below him rushed into a smooth uniform green. It was him landing from a great height on to the ground with another crack. It was him feeling something warm and wet spill out his mouth that was faced down on the ground. It was him reluctantly embracing the darkness he tried so hard to escape. It was the broad grin that he saw even when he could not open his eyes.

It was Double M.

The last words Fu Yoh heard in the distance before the darkness claimed him was:

'Kung Fool. Who's next?'

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-72725439181933413342009-01-09T15:05:00.002+08:002009-01-09T15:15:15.445+08:00iS tHIs sOnG lIKe hAppEnINg oR sOMeTHIN'?

Hey yawl. Like wazzup dude? Like waz are yawl up to dood? I been listenin' a lot lately. Like listening to MP3 and my iPod stuffs like that. But lately it got me thinkin' you know, this chix Avril, is she happening or what?

I dunno man. But they say she's a punk rocker. Well, I like, like tawdally man, I like have a bit of problem with that. I mean, if she's a punk how could she be a rawker man. My dad told me that's not possible dood. And then like, if she's a rocker how could she be a punk ey? I mean, like punk rocker. Isn't that like so mixed up like Obama or somethin'? I dunno man. Yawl tell me. But she's one hot gal man. I must say. Like, yo man, she's hawt or what?

This song you know, I'm with you thingy. Wadayawl think about it ey? I think it's oh so crap dood. I mean, that song like make no sense man. No sense. Like toawdally dood. So not happening man.

Like first she says:

"I'm standing on a bridge,
I'm waiting in the dark,
I thought that you'd be here by now".

Fine dood. That's okay by me. I mean, she waz like, waiting on a bridge. But why on a bridge? Nemind man. She waited on a bridge. Then she says:

"There's nothing but the rain,
No footsteps on the ground,
I'm listening but there's no sound".

Is she like deaf or somethin' dood? No sound? It must have been a really small drizzle dood. Must be. Or like there would be sound otherwise, no? And then how would there be footsteps on the ground when she was waiting on the bridge dood? I have problem man. This is like so out of my area man.

"Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home?"

Like why would anyone try to find her dood? I mean she's hot and all that. I know. But when she's standing on a bridge, in the rain, why would someone try to find her rite? Unless her mom or somethin' has lodged a missing person report or somethin' I would have thought. This one escape me man. Like so tawdally escape me.

"It's a damn cold night,
Tryin to figure out this life.
Won't you take me by the hand, take me somewhere new?
I don't know who you are, but I...
I'm with you.
I'm with you."

This is too deep dood. Tawdally man. This shit is so deep it makes Obama seems shallow man. Really. I mean. Like she was trying to figure out her life or somethin', on a bridge you know, and there was this rain you know. Then she figures, oh yeah, she figures why don't you take my hand man, take me somewhere new man. Coz ya know you might be the answer to all this questions she has about her life you know. And a new place might just be her life ya know. Yeah man. Dood, that shit is so deep man.

But then man, she said she doesn't know who it is man. That is so confusing dood. Coz then she said she's with him already. I mean, she was there rite. Thinking about life and all. Then she was asking someone to take her hand and all. I mean she doesn't know him or her but she is with him or her already dood.

Tell yawl what. I think she like, smoking some heavy stuffs dood. Like tawdally heavy stuffs.

Ciaoz.

art harunhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-82377210207678783502009-01-07T21:13:00.011+08:002009-08-19T00:07:35.744+08:00Kung Fu Fighting (Part 1)
A cool gentle breeze whispered through the large almost empty swaying field of long grass. A few white and light yellow petals occasionally floated by on invisible waves. Though not a cloud tarried in the deep blue sky, it was not hot as the sun was nowhere to be seen. A single large knotted trunk and densely leafed tree stood almost in the centre of the field, its twisted gnarled roots like tortured hands grasping something, anything, desperate for escape.

This is a good day to die, mumbled Double M.

He wore a simple robe that used to be light brown. It was less tattered and frayed around the edges with patched here and there. Double M sat on one of the thicker twist of root leaning against the deeply wrinkled trunk. His eyes were closed. His right hand held a tiny sharp blade which he scraped along a side of a thin though long slightly crooked branch.

He was about to break into a whistle of a distant melody when he suddenly heard three men treading very lightly at the edge of the field. They moved with purpose. They all wore cloth though one wore some metal armour. None carried swords, though another had a long wooden staff and another a short knife. From the sound they made, it was obvious that they took pains to conceal their presence. They had some skill in doing so too. Just not enough.

Though Double M heard the three men deliberately make their way to the tree, he made no effort to stir himself or open his eyes.

'Hail resting traveller!' called out the chocolate skinned man who wore singlet, dark green sarong and a light blue short sleeved shirt which lay open.

The little elusive smile that crept on to Double M's face at the greeting disappeared when he blinked his eyes open, like shadows in sunlight. He waved his right hand and returned the greeting. 'Where are you headed?' he asked.

'Over there,' he said as he pointed past the large tree into the forests in the distance.

'Ah, you still have some way to go then! Why don't you rest a bit?' said Double M breaking into a smile.

'Thank you for your kind offer traveler. I'm afraid we are on an urgent errand. Our quarry moves fast and so must we. Perhaps you could help us with our errand.'

'I'm always happy to help those in need, good sir! But in our haste, we must not forget our manners. Courtesy demands that we introduce ourselves first. I am Double M, traveller.'

A look of momentary surprise flashed on all three men's faces. To his right, the light yellow skinned man dressed in a simple deep scarlet shirt and pants slowly planted his tall wooden staff to the ground. To his left, the bald ebony skinned man swathed in white cloth to his left grew more still. The expression of the brown skinned man who stood in the middle gradually grew more blank.

'Greetings Double M. I apologise for my earlier lack of couth. I am Mat Pawer. To my right is Fu Yoh. To my left is Terror Lingam.' Both Fu Yoh and Terror Lingam bowed slightly at their introduction.

'Ah, the fearsome Technique of Three Heavens! I am honoured by your presence. Tell me, how can I help you fine gentlemen?'

'By your death, Double M,' replied Mat Pawer. 'Prepare yourself.'

At that, Double M's smile turned into a broad grin as he began to stand up.

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-49597172967457141752009-01-05T21:48:00.008+08:002009-01-05T22:44:14.365+08:00Pontifications of the Penis
A cross section of the penis as we know it

I have a penis so it goes that I'm man. That adores women. And admires men. So it means I'll get on my knees for the former. Not the latter. And for the most part, I enjoy wielding a penis. My penis. Not yours. Or yours. You sick bastard. I admit it's not the 15 incher most guys in their first flush of porn would crave for, but you can bet it's not something to pick your teeth with after you eat. More like a slow melting ice cream that doesn't melt ... kind of thing.

Actually, I don't like the word 'penis' because it sounds so clinical, so formal, so I need to wear gloves before I use it sorta thang. I like 'cock' better. It sounds dirtier. More sinister. Infinite possibilities abound. And it also rhymes with 'rock' and partially with 'fuck'. The downside is that it also rhymes with 'lock' but who cares. I'll never rhyme cock with lock because it sounds a little offensive, and I just fucking hate sounding like some offensive 15 inch cock wielder.

Which I'm not because I don't have the number. 15 to be precise. These days I've learned to be happy with what I have. Which means not having 15. That's what experience does to you. Or rather growing old. Sometimes though I can't quite tell the difference where one ends and the other begins or if it even started in the first place. And experience has taught me why I won't be content with 15.

Firstly, the surgery would hurt a lot. What's more, if I grafted a 15 incher, I might just get a massive stroke or heart attack whenever I get a boner, so that's no fun. 'Hey watch it honey, you don't want to turn me on! I might just die on you. But you can ride me after if you're into that.' What's more, if I had a 15 incher, it'll in all probability be black in colour. Like the Macbook out now. If you want a bigger hard drive, we only got them in black honeh! I may be Asian and all but big cocks are black. That's that man. I've never seen a 15 in any other colour. And, and I'd have to be all rapper like, wear big gold chains, swap my teeth for gold ones and get tattooed up. I'm just not into all that. Plus my rapping sucks and I can't play basketball or run really fast. So even if I had 15, it might be wasted on me.

And the vagina can only fit up to about 6 inches. So what's the point of having a 7 course meal when the diner only wants 3 satisfyingly full courses? Yes, a vagina can stretch much wider to accomodate a child but let's not dismiss comfort and extraordinary circumstances so readily shall we. That niner is not just excess... it's waste. And I abhor waste! Having a 15 incher swaying on a windy day will just conflict with my intense sense of moderation and reduce me to schizophrenia, if not multiple personalities for me and my cock. The latter may have psychological problems pretending to be a stout 8'er when he really is a hefty 15. There are somethings you just cannot fool yourself about.

A 15'er will never get the whole thing unless he's into horses. Even then, watch out for the kicks, cowboy! And, and, he won't be able to wear shorts in public that end at the thighs cos then the package will be showing. He would have no career in speed sports be it swimming or running because of the drag his cock caused. He cannot be terribly clever because most of the blood is usually swirling around his tower of cock. He would have to take many breaks to read, especially erotic stories. Even if 15 can be considered a super power, he can never have a cool superhero name because all of them will sound funny. Nobody will want him in their superteam and he will end up doing straight to video porno and die a lonely death naked in the tub in some cheap motel after overdosing on a potent mixture of viagra, cialis and cocaine with cheap German porn repeating silently on the television.

I guess it's hard being a 15'er too.

Poor chaps.

Spare a kind thought for the 15s yah? They're human too.

Daefhttp://email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-7068093708716886736.post-16131711959614996142009-01-03T18:31:00.001+08:002009-01-03T18:37:00.972+08:00Back to Basics
Ulu Yam
September 2008

Daefhttp://firstname.lastname@example.com


text:
Embed Code - If you would like this activity on your web page, copy the script below and paste it into your web page.
Normal Size Small Size show me how
Normal Size Small Size show me how
Chapter 10 Vocabulary: Thermochemistry
|The quantity of heat raises the temperature of 1 g of pure water.
|An apparatus for measuring heat changes.
|The measurement of heat changes.
|Chemical Potential Energy
|Energy stored within the structural units of units of chemical substances.
|The capacity for doing work; it exists in several forms, including chemical, nuclear, electrical, radiant, mechanical, and thermal energies.
|Endothermic Process
|Heat absorbing process.
|Exothermic Process
|A heating dissipating process.
|The amount of heat that a substance has at a given temperature and pressure.
|The energy that is transferred from one body to another because of a temperature difference.
|Heat Capacity
|The quantity of heat required to change an object's temperature by exactly 1 degree of C.
|Heat of Combustion
|The heat absorbed or released during a chemical reaction in which one mole of a substance is completely burned.
|Heat of Reaction
|The heat released or absorbed during a chemical reaction; equivalent to H, the change in enthalpy.
|Hess's Law of Heat Summation
|In going from a particular set of reactants to a particular sec of products, the enthalpy change is the same whether the reaction takes place or in a series of steps.
|The SI unit of energy; 4.184 joules equal 1.000 calorie.
|Law of Conservation of Energy
|Energy is neither created or destroyed in an ordinary chemical or physical process.
|Molar Heat of Fusion
|The energy, in kilojoules, required to melt one mole of a solid.
|Molar Heat of Vaporation
|The energy, in kilojoules, required to vaporize one mole of a liquid.
|Specific Heat Capacity
|The amount of heat it takes to raise the temperature of 1g of the substance 1 degree C and is measured in J/(g x 6 degrees C)
|Standard Heat of Formation
|The change in enthalpy (H) for a reaction in which one mole of a compound is formed from its constituent elements.
|The remainder of the universe that is outside the system.
|Any part of the universe that attention is focused on.
|Thermochemical Equation
|A chemical equation that includes the amount of heat produced or absorbed during the reaction.
|The study of heat changes in chemical reactions.
|The totality of all existing things.
Created by: KellyBeck


text:
Separate names with a comma.
Discussion in 'GBAtemp & Scene News' started by KiVan, Apr 27, 2003.
0986 - Azumanga Daioh Advance JAPAN 64 Mbits (MUGS)
Save Type : EEPROM[/p]
A card game? in japanese? with pictures of japanese anime girls? what will they think up next?
and it was made by mugs
YAY azumanga Daioh!!!!! the uber cool anime about a school and um stuff... toademasho! to ka de ma sho.. somthin somthing somthing somthing somthing... realy cool anime. goto check out the game
Need more anime video games and there numbers
The game looks cool, and btw ITS NOT MADE BY MUGS lol IT WAS DUMPED by Mugs :/
Um.....I think it was just a joke?
Great Anime Series, but hell if I know what they are saying in this game...


text:
Aardvark Childcare
Click here to edit subtitle
My name is Georgina, and I am an Ofsted registered childminder. I live and work in my family home on the outskirts of the vibrant and historic Cathedral city of Exeter, in Devon. In October 2012 I was inspected by Ofsted, and was graded as 'Good'. You can find the link to my report here.
Through this website, you can find out more about me, and the services I can offer, see some of the things we get up to, or get in touch to ask any further questions you might have.
Are you unsure if using a childminder is right for you? Do you wonder what it is a childminder actually does all day? Then check out the FAQ for more information on these topics and a few others.
I have a page explaining the Early Years Foundation Stage, a national educational strategy that all childcare professionals caring for children under school age have to follow, and some information on the various types of financial assistance that may be available to parents.
On the food and nutrition page, there is a sample menu, as well as information about the meals and snacks I can provide.
I have also made a some of the policies, procedures and other documents that I use available here for download. Anyone can download these, including any other childminders (or pre-registration childminders looking for some help!), although I do ask that you do me the courtesy of leaving a message in my guest book to let me know.
I would also love it if you let me know what you think about the site!


text:
CO apartment complex bans gun owners
"We're leaving says one resident. "I think the others are too. I mean, the word is out. Crooks come on and rob the place."
U.S. Not Celebrating 150th Anniversary of Civil War
Most re-enactments in Egypt, Lebanon, Syria, Libya,etc.
Facebook Founder Zuckerberg makes $4 Million in One Day
Facebook Founder Mark Zuckerberg makes nearly $4 billion in one day of trading. Then has pocket picked at the airport. "Not to worry", he tells police. "I only keep a million or so on me."
George W. Bush Recovering Nicely
After By-Pass surgery, someone told the former President that his pants were zipped and he glanced around and then looked down. "Yep! He's back to normal."
Mick Jagger Turns 70
But after several cosmetic surgeries with two face lifts, he looks 80! On the other hand, Keith Richards looks like he's been dead for some time now.
Archaeologist On Easter Island Identifies Statues
"It is my opinion that they are some kind of figure heads", stated Professor Ian Tyson.
Weiner Not Being Frank! Calls Opponent Old Fart
After a NYC candidate forum at the AARP, Weiner, 48, touched the chest of 69-year-old Rep. candidate George McDonald, who responded: "Old Fart huh? Don't put your slimy hands on me again."
Weiner Gets A Good Grilling
Many at grilling stated that he gave them all a good impression! "We thought he would be hot-dogging it but he was a gentleman."
First Lab-Grown Hamburger, Made From Stem Cells, Served in London
By a robot waitress on skates.
Global Terrorist Lookout
NSA, Other Country Homeland Security asks that all people everywhere report anyone who is acting suspiciously..not county NYC subway.
Queen records message to subjects should nuclear war come
"Any of you that are not fried grease balls or shadows on the walkway, keep a stiff upper lip and rally the British Kingdom."
NSA people assure US public that they can't see through walls!
(background speaker) "Hey Ronald. Come see these. No need for porn on the net if you see what some of these horny people are doing in their bedrooms). Shhhhhhh!
Scientists Tell U.S. Public Not To Worry About Asteroids
"If one WERE to hit the earth then you wouldn't know about it anyway. It would suddenly appear and you would suddenly disappear. I hope that has settled several people's worries."
Groping Incidents By San Diego Mayor Down 50%
"At least he's trying", say most. "How about that Weiner fellow?"
Increased Chatter By Terrorists Last Week
CIA now say it may have been a bad connection or a wire unplugged somewhere.
Georgia marks fifth anniversary of Russia war
Former President elderly Jimmy Carter: "That's all. Only five years. I don't even recall war with Russia. Was that where Billy died? Are we still holding on to Richmond?"
UN: Colombia coca crop down 25 percent
US: Meth labs up 25%. Average American 25% uglier with 25% less teeth.
Ghosts Still At It!
Once again the ghosts of John and George appeared to Ringo in bed and laughed at him aging while they're still young. "Look at the hooter, George! Ha ha ha!" "You just need fake mustache and glasses!"
Russia wants the United States out of Afghanistan!
'It's only fair", says Putin. "We had it before you and now it's our time to get to play in the rocks and cave. I'll be riding a white horse and they will fear me!"
Souse Singer At Bar in Paducah
He-heres a lettle somethin you'll all lack: "Oh Gandy, I something something you came and something uh hic! without uh randy. Till I sent you something...something." Wadden thet grape?"
Green Day Band Performing In N. Korea
Lots of clapping and cheering...or else! Kim Jong Un joins band on stage and does the Macarena or something close to it.
Dog Suspects UPS Package Will Endanger Lives of Entire Household, Responds Accordingly
Spike, the 9-pound Pomeranian, nearly busted the door down trying to repel the UPS package delivery today. Barking non-stop for 5 minutes, Spike eventually declared victory and shut the hell up.
written by Moe Nightwalker, 08 August 2013
Spying Equipment found in Supreme Court Room
One surprise: They never give a verdict until after Jeopardy is over. Winner gets to announce the decision.
Pursued meteors will light up night sky on Monday
I'm sorry. That should be "Perseid meteors will light up night sky on Monday".
Is Spontaneity the Greatest Danger to Your Weight?
Most say yes but many answer that it's probably that evening meal that lasts from 6-10 PM while watching TV.
Headlines: NSA surveillance more extensive than previously
How can that be when they already had info one every single one of us. I got a call last night and a whisperer told me that I had left the cat out.
In wishing Bush well, Putin has message for Obama
"Take that Mr. Osama", Russia's Putin tells Russian press!
Actor George Takei joins petition to move Winter Olympics from Russia to Canada
Explains: "Just taking the President's side in pissing contest with Putin!"
President Obama to Begin talking to the Unemployed
He will be making his first stop at...oh, just about anywhere in America!
US Drone Kills Six More Terrorists in Yemen
That's 32 in all, if you are keeping score. Wait a minute. I forgot to sign mine. That's a 2-dead terrorist penalty.
Bezos known for his demanding style as manager.
Yet almost 80% of Clown Union say they support him!
Rodeo bull runs wild at Minnesota fair.
Runs through Best China judging tent!
Egyptian Civil War Could Last A Long Time
Especially when the United States civil war II breaks out here. "We will not allow the government to take our liberties much longer", says member of Tea Party.
REPORT: Obama admin makes new rule to compel diversity in neighborhoods
"Every third house has to be filled with a minority."
Jeb Bush rips Damon for sending his kids to private school
Then rips one off in disgust as he leaves mike. "Bush Beans To You Damon!"
NSA Searches Content to and From USA; Texts, emails.
Plus anything we can blackmail you with at election time.
That's the Long & Short of it!
I thought of a new password for my computer and put mypenis as the new one. A message came back: 'Error- not long enough'
written by j.w., 08 August 2013
Laugh Prison: Branson's new airline to stage on-board comedy shows.
"Have you heard the one about the aircraft that split in two while in the air? Well, you'll love this one. Wake that guy up. He wouldn't want to miss anything."
Spy Versus Spy
IRS manual detailed DEA's use of hidden intel evidence on citizens...who would have thought that free Americans could be turned into a nation of spies?