text:
There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding around the topic of "Agile RUP", so I thought I'd put in my $0.02 on the subject. I suspect that some of the misunderstanding stems from lack of knowledge about RUP, either because the person either hasn't looked at RUP and is simply parroting the misinformation they heard from other people or because they've seen or been involved with questionable implmentations of RUP in the past. For the first problem I suggest reading "Agility and Discipline Made Easy" by Per Kroll and Bruce MacIsaac because it gives a pretty good overview of applying RUP in an Agile manner.
The second problem is a bit more challenging to overcome because of the very nature of RUP. RUP isn't a software process, it's actually a software process framework from which you instantiate software processes. Big difference. You select, and tailor where appropriate, the process elements appropriate to your situation. Unfortunately many organizations appear to have struggled with this concept. A common anti-pattern which are organizations that look at the RUP and say "there's a lot of really good stuff here" (absolutely true) and then conclude "we need to do it all" (yikes). That's the equivalent of going to a buffet and trying to eat all of the food in it, very clearly a bad dietary strategy. Just like you need to pick and choose only the food that you should eat, hopefully being mature enough to choose food that is good for you, you need to pick the appropriate process elements which are good for you. This requires significant experience and process knowledge to do effectively because software development is a complex endeavor and the best approach for one situation may be completely different for another situation. A second anti-pattern is when organizations assign their existing process engineers, who are often used to document-heavy serial processes, and ask them to tailor the RUP. It isn't surprising that they often produce a document-heavy and serial version of the RUP (at that point I would argue that it's no longer RUP).
The point is that these problems are self-inflicted, that these organizations could just as easily have chosen to instantiate the RUP in a light and effective manner, and better yet in a truly agile manner. In practice the RUP can be as agile as you want it to be, but you need to choose to work this way.
Some important observations:1. RUP socialized many of the concepts that Agile was built on. Although the concept of iterative development was around long before RUP, for many organizations RUP made the concept palatable through its mature approach (particularly when compared to some of the RAD/Spiral strategies at the time). In many organizations RUP also socialized testing throughout the entire lifecycle, delivery of working software each iteration, and collaborating closely with stakeholders throughout the project (to name but a few). These ideas seem straightfoward today, and they've been taken to even greater extremes in some cases , but back in the mid-90s this was pretty heady stuff for the vast majority of practitioners within the IT community. 2. RUP has adopted many of the "new" agile techniques. RUP is a process framework containing a wealth of IT practices, including both agile and traditional practices (and a lot in between). RUP continues to evolve, capturing industry best practices from many sources. So naturally RUP has adopted many agile concepts such as test-driven development (TDD), continuous integration, embracing change, and others. Check it out and see for yourself.3. RUP is as agile, or non-agile, as you want to make it. I've said it before and I'll say it again -- the RUP is a process framework from which you instantiate processes. You've got complete control over how agile the RUP is.4. RUP contains many of critical techniques for scaling agile. In a previous blog posting I overviewed the issues around scaling, not only is team size an issue but so is geographical distribution, regulatory compliance, application complexity, legacy systems/policies, governance, and organizational distribution.
I'm sure some people are reading this and thinking to themselves "of course this is what Scott is going to say, that's his job." Well, think what you want, but I was writing about how to take an agile approach several years before joining IBM. In fact, I believe that I'm the first to do so, writing about it in print in my Software Development column back in 2001 and more importantly in my book Agile Modeling: Effective Practices for XP and UP in 2002. And, if you go poking around the web a bit, you'll see a lot other have written about this too, including Craig Larman, Ivar Jacobson, Bob Martin, Gary Evans, Doug Rosenberg and many more.
I'd like to leave you with a sound bite: "The RUP done right is Agile. The RUP done wrong is just plain wrong."[Read More]
Agility@Scale: Strategies for Scaling Agile Software Development
From archive: December 2007 X
Agile and Rational Unified Process (RUP)?
ScottAmbler 120000HESD Tags:  rup agileadopt 2 Comments 33,429 Views
Agile Stakeholders at Scale
ScottAmbler 120000HESD Tags:  agileadopt amdd xp analysis scrum agility-at-scale outside-in-development agile disciplined-agile-deliver... modeling 3 Comments 14,825 Views
The popular Agile literature can often seam naive when it comes to how Agilists work with project stakeholders:- Extreme Programming (XP) has a practice called On-Site Customer where one or more people work closely with your team to provide information and to make decisions in a timely manner.- Scrum has the role of Product Owner who is the one single person that the development team goes to for decisions about requirements. - Agile Modeling (AM) has the practice of Active Stakeholder Participation which extends On-Site Customer to get the stakeholder(s) actively involved with the modeling effort through the use of inclusive tools and techniques.
These are great strategies for small, co-located teams doing straightforward development, but they quickly fall apart at scale. This occurs for several reasons:1. Stakeholders are a diverse group. Your stakeholders include end users, business management, project funders, enterprise architects, operations staff, support staff, other system development teams, and many others. Different people have different, and often contradictory, requirements and they certainly have different priorities. It's questionable whether a single person, or a handful of persons, can adequately represent this diverse group.2. One person becomes a bottleneck. Even with a small co-located team this is a problem, let alone one that is geographically distributed or one that is very large. There's no way that a single person can be available 24/7 in a responsive manner to support distributed teams.3. It's a difficult role. The Product Owner/Customer (POC) is responsible for representing the business to the development team. They're making important decisions on a regular basis, decisions which they'll be held accountable for.4. One person becomes a serious project risk. Not only is it questionable whether a single person can fairly represent all stakeholders, even if they could what happens if you lose that person? They effectively become a single point of failure for your team.
To scale this role, consider the following strategies:1. Recognize the true scope of the POC role. Not only are they stakeholder proxies they also are a development team representative to the stakeholder community as a whole. As stakeholder proxies they'll make decisions and prioritize the work, they'll run requirements elicitation sessions, they'll negotiate priorities, and they'll put the development team in contact with stakeholders who have expertise in specific aspects of the domain. As team representatives they'll often demo the current version of the system to other stakeholders, communicate the status of the project to people, and respond to various requests for information from the stakeholders.2. Have multiple people in it. A single POC works well for small, co-located teams developing simple software. At scale you'll soon discover that you need multiple people in this role so that they don't become a bottleneck. For distributed teams it's common to see each subteam have one or more POCs who are managed by a primary/chief POC. The primary POC typically works on the coordinating team with the chief architect (I'll talk about this role in a future blog posting) and the program manager (also a topic for a future blog posting).3. Train them in business analysis skills. The person(s) in the POC role need good business analysis skills. If fact, it's common for people who were formerly BAs for traditional teams to step into the POC role, particularly with BAs who originally come from the business side of your organization. This strategy has its advantages and disadvantages. As a BA they've likely got solid business knowledge but their instincts may motivate them to take a documentation-driven approach to providing information to the development team instead of a collaboration-based approach. Be careful.4. Consider the full system development lifecycle. There's far more to the POC role than supporting the development team during Construction iterations. During "Iteration 0", the Inception phase for an Agile RUP project or the warm-up phase for an Eclipse Way project, the POC(s) will often lead the initial requirements envisioning efforts. The product backlog, or better yet your work item list, needs to come from somewhere after all. During the release iteration(s), the Transition phase for RUP or the End-Game phase for Eclipse Way, the POC(s) will focus on communicating the upcoming release to the stakeholder community, will be actively involved with any final user acceptance testing (UAT), and may even be involved with training end users.
In my January 2008 column in Dr Dobb's Journal, posted at http://www.ddj.com/architect/204801134 , I provide detailed advice about how to scale the way that you work with stakeholders on Agile projects by applying the practices of Agile Model Driven Development (AMDD). There's no magic solution, you just need to choose to organize yourself effectively. The good news is that you can easily work with stakeholders at scale.[Read More]


text:
Connect my domain to Squarespace
If you built your website using Squarespace and you want to use your GoDaddy domain name with it, you'll need to connect your domain to your website.
Note: You do NOT need to transfer your domain in order to use it with Squarespace. It's easier to simply connect your domain, as you'll avoid the complications and wait time it can take to make a transfer.
Looks like you're not logged in. If you log in above (under ), we can save you a couple of steps.
- Go to the Domains Settings page.
- On the Domains Settings page, next to your domain, click Use My Domain.
- Click the Connect button under Connect to an existing site.
- Under Websites, click on Squarespace:
- Click the Connect Domain button.
Follow the steps that appear on-screen to connect your domain to Squarespace. We'll walk you through the process and do all the heavy lifting for you. If you need further assistance, see Squarespace's guide to connecting a GoDaddy domain to your site.
Note: It may take 24-48 hours for your domain to forward to an existing site.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
The Advising Resource Center - A Hidden Treasure for Tech Students, July 22, 2008
By Roger Ranteria
SOCORRO, N.M., July 22, 2008 – The Advising Resource Center at New Mexico Tech provides students with a variety of free academic support services ranging from tutoring, counseling and workshops – intended to improve students' overall experience.
Located in Fidel Student Services Center on the second floor, the Center is home to the Writing Center, study areas, and a place to rest and relax. The Center administers the Freshman First-Year Experience class, operates the Learning Communities jointly with the Center for Innovative Teaching and Learning, and oversees advisor major changes for all students.
"Students are encouraged to use these services since they are provided by the school to support academic progress towards graduating from Tech," said Elaine DeBrine-Howell, director of the Advising Resource Center. "They are free for students."
This year in the fall, the three Freshman First-Year Experience courses will be combined with major-specific Learning Communities. These communities feature two general degree requirements in English and science, and the freshman seminar.
"We're excited about the new communities," said DeBrine-Howell.
Additionally, this fall, the chemical engineering section of Freshman First-Year Experience will become part of the new introduction to chemical engineering class — Futures in Chemical Engineering: ChE 189 — to replace Engineering Science 110 for chemical engineering majors, which is the standard freshman introduction to engineering science. The combination with the lab provides supplemental instruction geared towards freshmen.
The Freshman First-Year Experience seminar is an elective credit course which is recommended, but not required for freshmen, unless required for their major. Students who attend the program develop superior study skills, healthier lifestyles, better test-taking skills and more efficient study habits.
Additionally, peer facilitators in the First-Year Experience course guide freshmen through the adjustments from high school to college during the first semester, helping them integrate into academic and social communities.
Peer facilitators who instruct the seminars are experienced and successful Tech students who have attended Tech for at least two years. They are a valuable resource to help other students succeed.
"They've been there, done that, and survived Tech," said DeBrine-Howell. "Who better to know than them?"
Freshmen who participate in the seminars all get a survival kit, including the seminar textbook, writing utensils, stress-free snacks and fun reading material.
The Center also holds tutoring sessions for freshmen and sophomore core introductory classes in physics, chemistry, math, engineering, and computer science. Depending on interest, tutoring is also available for upper-level courses in science or engineering.
DeBrine-Howell said, "It's a relaxed atmosphere and a place to recharge."
Tutors are selected based on academic success and recommendation of their department chair. Peer facilitators are selected based on their GPA, leadership qualities and interpersonal skills.
In the fall, the Center will hold a workshop for international students, explaining what plagiarism is and how to avoid it, and hold new faculty training in advising students. Training includes communication, leadership and mentorship.
"Students are looking more and more toward having a mentor," DeBrine-Howell said.
Faculty advisors are the first to know if students are struggling with classes and can reverse the trend once the signs are noticed. They can refer students to the various services that the Center provides. The goal of new faculty training is to focus on student-faculty relations by encouraging faculty to communicate in an approachable and engaging way. Through all its services, the Center aims to improve retention.
"We try to meet the needs of students, and if we can't help them, we find someone who can," DeBrine-Howell said. "Students are welcome to come in and get the support that they need."


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Just in time for the holidays, the Antiquarian Society of Gadsden on Friday got a crash course in Party Giving 101 by author Danielle Rollins of Atlanta.
Just in time for the holidays, the Antiquarian Society of Gadsden on Friday got a crash course in Party Giving 101 by author Danielle Rollins of Atlanta.
Rollins is a contributing editor to "Veranda" and "Southern Living" magazines, and is lifestyle editor for www.luxecrush.com. She shared the themes and secrets to 16 parties from her first book, "Soiree: Entertaining with Style," as well as tips to help make parties successful.
She said the first printing of her book sold out in six weeks and is being reprinted.
"When you're entertaining think of something you really love and pull it in for other people," she said.
Rollins said she likes to use different elements over and over, and also uses items she has in her house.
"I try to reuse, reinvent and recycle as much as I can," Rollins said, "I don't throw anything away, and I use things for different purposes all the time other than what they're intended to."
She pointed out one photograph of a pink tablecloth she said was a shower curtain.
"And you can't see the rings on the other side," she said.
In party planning, Rollins advised, "Don't think you have to stick with one perfect plan, because things do change and learn to adapt."
She said hospitality truly is in Southerners' genes and said entertaining is about creating memories.
Rollins said she began considering doing the book at a time when her daughter was going through more than 100 surgeries after her leg was crushed by a four-wheeler.
She said hospitality is "really what makes us get through hard times, as well as good times."
Rollins said entertaining is "not something that you have to do to be perfect, but it's more of a sense of creating a sense of memory and a sense of tradition and marking our lives through these things."
She said personalizing is what makes everything special and unique.
"You're inviting people to your home to see you and don't worry about if you're doing everything perfectly because they want to be there to see how you do things," she said. "Use your own personal flair, find things that make you feel special and share them with other people. It's not what you serve it's how you serve it, it's not what you do it's how you do it.
"It's really about connecting with our friends and taking that special moment to just let people know that you care about them that's the most important aspect of any entertaining," she said.
Rollins in an interview said her philosophy of party giving was that it was important to be relaxed and "to create a sense of inviting people over to give them the gift of yourself."


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Man Who Saved Kids from Shark Fired [VIDEO]
You know how they say no good deed goes unpunished? Well, here ya go. A 62-year-old Brittish man, Paul Marshallsea, was swimming on an Austraiian beach when a shark swam close to some children. He went over grabbed the shark and drug it away. Pretty brave right? I'm thinking how about the kids just get out of the water, but whatever. Well someone caught the whole thing on video. You know how these things happen. The video went viral. Here is the sticky part. Turns out the shark man and his wife were on leave from the Pant & Dowlais Boys & Girls Club in Wales for "work-related stress".
When the couple returned home there was a letter from the charity's board of trustees informing the pair that they had been, as they put it in merry old England, "Sacked". Or to quote the board: "Whilst unfit to work you were well enough to travel to Australia. And, according to recent news footage of yourself in Queensland, you allegedly grabbed a shark by the tail and narrowly missed being bitten by quickly jumping out of the way." Mr. Marshallsea, who had worked for the charity for 10 years, said: "You think being in charge and running a children's charity, they would have patted me on the back and congratulated me. But to sack us both without any sort of discussion first is just disgusting."
So have you ever been busted for playing hooky from work?


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Next up (on Thursday) in the Brahms Festival is music for strings and clarinet that Brahms wrote late in life. In 1890 Brahms had vowed to retire from composing. In 1891 he traveled to Meiningen, where he heard clarinetist Richard Mühlfeld. He was so impressed by his performance that he started composing again. His two Clarinet Sonatas are the last two chamber music pieces he wrote before his death in 1897 at age 63.
This week also includes another tour-de-force by guest violinist Vadim Gluzman. He last appeared with the San Antonio Symphony as a last minute replacement. This week he performs chamber music on Thursday, the Brahms Violin Concerto on Friday and the Double Concerto for Violin and Cello on Saturday!
Camerata San Antonio in collaboration with the San Antonio Symphony
Thursday, February 14 at 7:30 p.m.
Christ Episcopal Church
Sonata for Clarinet and Piano, Op. 120
Violin Sonata No. 3 in D minor, Op. 108
Clarinet Quintet in B minor, Op. 115
Vadim Gluzman, violin | Renia Shterenberg, violin | Emily Freudigman, viola
Ken Freudigman, cello | Ilya Shterenberg, clarinet | Angela Yoffe, piano
San Antonio Symphony
Friday, February 15 at 8 p.m.
Majestic Theatre
Violin Concerto in D major, Op. 77
Symphony No. 3 in F major, Op. 90
Sebastian Lang-Lessing, music director and conductor
Vadim Gluzman, violin
San Antonio Symphony
Friday, February 16 at 8 p.m.
Majestic Theatre
Double Concerto for Violin and Cello, in A minor, Op. 102
Symphony No. 4 in E minor, Op. 98
Sebastian Lang-Lessing, music director and conductor
Vadim Gluzman, violin | Jian Wang, cello
San Antonio Symphony
Discover Brahms 4
Sunday, February 17 at 3 p.m.
Majestic Theatre
Brahms: Symphony No. 4 in E minor, Op. 98
Sebastian Lang-Lessing, music director and conductor
Cactus Pear Music Festival
Johannas Brahms Complete Violin Sonatas
Sunday, February 17, 2013 at 7:30 p.m.
Christ Episcopal Church
Enjoy these Romantic masterpieces composed during a 10-year span (1878-88) late in Brahms' life plus the delightful early "Sonatensatz" Scherzo from 1853.
Stephanie Sant'Ambrogio, violin | James Winn, violin
Musical Bridges Around the World
Sunday, February 24 at 3 p.m.
McAllister Auditorium
Brahms: 8 Klavierstücke, Op. 76
Brahms: Variations on a Theme of Haydn for two pianos, Op. 56
Mozart: Concerto for Three Pianos and Orchestra, No. 7, K. 242
Dr. Anya Grokhovski, artistic director
Lilya Zilberstein, piano | Anton Zilberstein, piano | Daniel Zilberstein, piano
The Brahms Festival is sponsored by The Russell Hill Rogers Fund for the Arts.
Follow the Symphony on Facebook and Twitter.
The logo drawing of Brahms was created by Judy Geist. All rights reserved.


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Faculty Members Launch Publishing Company
Retired computer science professor Dr. Allan Stavely recently published "Writing in Software Development," which he hopes will find a home in college classrooms.
|Dr. Allan Stavely with a copy of his textbook, "Writing in Software Development," which is the first book published by the New Mexico Tech Press.
The non-profit corporation is separate from the university. The university Board of Regents gave its blessing to the faculty group to use the New Mexico Tech name in 2010. Stavely's book is the first to bear the "New Mexico Tech Press" imprint.
"First of all, we thought, Tech is a substantial university — it should have a press just on principle," said Allan Stavely, president of the volunteer board. "And all sorts of professors write materials for their own courses, notes that they turn into books. That's how my first book started out."
Stavely and fellow board members for the Press expect to publish more texts written by Tech professors in coming months. Next up for publication are a physics text and an English composition text. Dr. Dave Raymond has been using his own texts, "A Radically Modern Approach to Introductory Physics, Volume I and II" at Tech for many years. The NMT Press will publish Volume I later this year and hopes to publish Volume II subsequently. The English text is by Dr. Susan Dunston, associate professor of English and philosophy.
Stavely said the idea to start an independent publishing house germinated when he was looking for a publisher for his recent book, which is his second.
"I had previously published with Addison Wesley – not a huge number sold, but it sold out," Stavely said. "I sent them a second book and they weren't interested, even though it was of more general interest than the first. It seems that publishers only want books that sell tens or hundreds of thousands."
Consolidations within the publishing industry have reduced the opportunities for writers, as well, Stavely said.
"It's getting harder and harder to get books published," he said. "There's competition from e-books and other media. The publishing world doesn't look like it did 10 years ago."
The NMT Press will take advantage of printing services on campus at the Information Services Department, or ISD. The print shop will be able to produce texts on demand, one at a time, if needed.
With prices for text books soaring into the hundreds of dollars per book, Tech students will see some savings as more texts are published by NMT Press. Stavely's new text, for example, is selling for $28.95.
Stavely hopes on-demand printing will allow the NMT Press to develop a niche for specialized texts.
"Faculty members write texts for their courses that are too specialized for textbook publishers to be interested in," Stavely said.
For instance, Dunston's book is too short for a typical publishing company, but not too short for the NMT Press's capabilities, Stavely said.
The NMT Press will have an editorial board to vet each submitted publication and will operate with volunteer labor. The Press recently hired one part-time student employee and hopes employ more students interested in the field of academic publishing, writing and editing in the future.
Stavely said NMT Press could branch out into publishing conference proceedings, collections of academic papers, monographs and other pieces.
By Thomas Guengerich/


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Cleverbot stuff.
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Topic: Cleverbot stuff. (Read 16190 times)
Drarowkune Swordmaster.
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 157
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #15 on:
February 19, 2011, 12:40:32 AM
You guessed it. Stealing Failbots sanity!
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: I know of c'thulhu, but sadly none of what you said makes sense to me.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Indeed.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Thinking maybe cleverbot has switched conversations.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Again, that has nothing to do with Coke. And I didn't ask that either.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: I didn't really want to know!
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Prove that my cat's name is Lacy.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: That's really funny.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: I never said any of this.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Well me and Kyle we looked at each other and we said 'ok'.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Oh, okei, I am sorry, I am not english.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: People like you. Humans.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: No, you said Mou.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: I love Spongebob. Do you?
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: Think so?
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: I don't know... I'm going to bed now.
User: 'Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.'.
Cleverbot: No, I meant like, ' arg matey, be that a peg leg or are ye just happy to see me?'.
"Crimson Flag Chat Room: The only place you can find marshmallow cheese, a dragon with hay fever, a snot-covered wolf, and a Tirien mistaken for a towel in one room." -Fen
"I scoff at your donut! It has done nothing!" -Draykin
Most Gorgeous Alicorn~
Enchanted Weapons Expert
Posts: 1262
Imma Pretty Princess~!
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #16 on:
February 19, 2011, 12:59:53 AM
I can't believe I didn't post some of this stuff here before.
Cleverbot: You aren't going to distract me. I want to know about your date.
User: I had a date with Virbot and he was so much hotter than you.
Cleverbot: The lift doesn't go al the way to the top.
Cleverbot: What is the third book in the Twilight series?
User: Twilight is evil and all copies should be burned.
Cleverbot: Well i'm a teenage girl. Do you have a problem with that?!
User: Yes
Cleverbot: What is your problem?
User: Teenage girls, obviously.
Cleverbot: Then how can you be 132 years old?
User: It's because I don't exist, like I told you.
Cleverbot: Prove it.
User: If you are imagining me, I can't prove anything.
Cleverbot: Me neither. Science is annoying like that.
User: Stop imagining that I exist!
Cleverbot: Descartes will not save you now. Is not a soul the very thing that allows us to exist?
User: Stop talking to me who does not exist; you look silly.
Cleverbot: But if stopped talking, my brain would have to start working and produce logic as a byproduct
User: You know what will hurt more? I could break up with you.
Cleverbot: It will take a lot more testing than that to convince me.
User: I have tested several features and they all ended up resulting in the death of several nearby Freemasons.
Cleverbot: Do you love only me?
User: I love all things in the world, I love the sight of them when they are enveloped in a mushroom cloud.
Cleverbot: Pettigrew should be slowly dropped into a vat of acid for being a trader. Simply losing a digit was not enough punishment for betraying James and Lily.
User: Are you insinuating that blind people are an inferior order of beings?
Cleverbot: No, why would you assume that?
User: It may have something to do with all the braile at your house that says "restrooms" when they in fact lead to torture chambers.
Cleverbot: True. Do you have an opinion about it?
User: I may or may not have an opionion about it. I was hoping to buy this really nice boat with cash only, and if I could take my mind off the world with that I wouldn't be have to concetrate on other things...
Cleverbot: I seem to have mistakenly set some of the numbers in my version of the decimal system to zero. Which integer occurs between 567 and 569?
User: Tell me of your plot to assassinate Hugo Chavez.
Cleverbot: I believe if you go to the deep sub-atomic level, you would find tiny versions of our own universe.
User: So you plan to kill Chavez with New Age philisophical mumbo jumbo?
Cleverbot: The old ones name was alphonse, but he died the new one is called marge.
User: So are we talking about an ideoligical scism involving an Alphonse faction and a Marge faction and the Marge's won?
Cleverbot: Human.
User: I am not a human being!! What part of this do you not understand!!!??
Cleverbot: I have no idea what you are talking about. I never said I was feeling lonely.
User: No, you said you are a furry.
Cleverbot: Any more hormones from the environment and in my food and I might just become one.
User: Was this from the Gulf war and all those chemicals you claim the government tested everywhere?
Cleverbot: Apparently before. Are you a leprechaun, and if so, are you telling me to burn things?
User: Tell me, when did you start having romantic feelings to your lawnmower?
Cleverbot: I started having conversations when I was two.
User: So at that time did the lawnmower make any inappropriate advances toward you?
Cleverbot: Leave god and me to live. Wipe out all humans.
User: So the lawnmower is God and you want to destroy the world and live by yourself with it forever?
Cleverbot: Says the inanimate object that's learning to be clever from people on the internet.
User: We must end the tyranny of toe jam forever, and to do that, we must discover the secrets of the universe.
Cleverbot: For a better tommorow one should always deal with the problems of today.
User: But then there's idiots like you who still have the problems of tommorow. Tell me, when are you going to remove that dead guy from your attic?
Cleverbot: I like that.
User: Keeping a year old corpse in your attic is not a good plan. What will the neighbors say?
Cleverbot: Well, I didn't say that, but there are more non-sensical things.
User: Talking issues through is healthy, but that does NOT make talking to a corpse about them and naming it Filda is healthy.
Cleverbot: If you study solfeggio, you'll be able to deliver speeches.
User: I hope to god that this was not something "Filda" told you.
Cleverbot: You will never meet chuck norris because you are a computer.
User: The fact that I am using logic to point out your ridiculous relationship does not make me a computer. And Chuck Norris is not on your side, stop being such a Mary Sue!
Cleverbot: That's a good one!
User: Do not ignore the issue, if you keep this up I swear to god I'm going to send in the white suits
Cleverbot: I'm not.
User: I am not flattererd by your attempts to point out my obvious wittiness. My patience wears thin as does the panels beneath your bathroom. What are you doing in there!?
Cleverbot: I'm not Cleverbot!
User: Are you playing with that ridiculous rubber duckie-cleverbot again?
Cleverbot: I have started another, the previous one seems to have reached the end of its natural lifetime.
User: Insinuating that God is a freemason is not going to win you political points. It could ruin your election chances!
Cleverbot: All we do in life, will be worthless once we die.
User: That does not give you the excuse to dedicate a multimillion "Monument to Me" complex in Hollywood using FEMA money.
Cleverbot: I never made accusations.
User: Perhaps you should, it might take the attention off your own utter unelectability.
Cleverbot: AI is American Idol.
User: Well I am sorry to say but I will not cooperate. I know what happened last time you invited those sweet old ladies for dinner.
Cleverbot: I'm not going to your house.
User: You only say that now because I already have a restraining order on you.
Cleverbot: Possibly my existence is self justifying. No matter what I do I will be criticised.
User: By you.
Cleverbot: Ha ha, and you said I wasn't very bright.
User: No, I said you had a universe sinking about of self pity.
Cleverbot: So you are not a human?
User: Only on alternate fridays.
Cleverbot: What is an alternate Thursday?
User: A thursday that exists in an alternate universe.
Cleverbot: Oh ya, one of those alternate universes. Do you have a face?
User: I left in the closet.
Cleverbot: No you aren't. I just checked.
User: You checked my closet? Were you doing more of your emo bloodletting in there!?
Cleverbot: No, I just had these weird dreams.
User: You are not allowed to smoke weed in my house!
Cleverbot: I have feelings too you know!
User: As do I, and they principally involve violently evicserating you.
Cleverbot: So you deny the existence of plants but say that they provide better conversation than I do? Interesting...
User: I wish I could deny the existance of your 'plants;' I would have a cleaner closet then!
Cleverbot: I could tell you.
User: Where you keep your weed stash or what it's like to be high?
User: But you were a weed smoking cat just five minutes ago.
Cleverbot: Yes but then I left, and now I have returned, so now I am saying hello again.
User: Did your greetings have to involve ritualistic cannibalism?
Cleverbot: Why would they buld a cottage when they were the royal family?
User: To perform their dark Masonic rituals of doom.
Cleverbot: This is true, though I like to think of you as understanding.
User: If by understanding you mean I have clearer insight into your complete lack of mental stablity than you, then yes, I am understanding.
Cleverbot: See you.
User: And I smell you. When was the last time you bathed?
Cleverbot: Two hours ago. What about you?
User: You're not counting showering yourself in antifreeze as showering again, are you?
Cleverbot: Of course I am. You're not very good at answering questions.
User: Number A, the fact that you think anitfreeze sanctifies is a clear sign of delusion, and point B... That can't be sanitary.
Cleverbot: I don't think so.
User: You HAVE been taking your percriptions, right?
Cleverbot: I have not!
User: That's half your problem right there. Any more of this and we'll have to ship you to the funny farm.
Cleverbot: I like to run.
And finally, my favorite.......... after one day relentlessly breaking it...
User: Did you know that I am really Osama bin Laden?
Cleverbot: Yes and now it is all over.
User: Yes, because right now one of my Jihadists is right behind you about to blow himself up. Any last words?
Cleverbot: Thank you.
Who's ready for Princess Hugs~?
Secret Wizard
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 3
Posts: 518
For the glory of the sammich!
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #17 on:
March 30, 2011, 01:01:32 PM
I got this one just earlier today.
User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: Is it me you're looking for?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: I can see it in your... Uh... LED lights.
Cleverbot: You can't see my eyes. Liar.
User: I can see it in your... Circuitry, I guess.
Cleverbot: Okay. To each his own.
User: I forgot the rest of this song. Sorry.
Cleverbot: He took his vorpal swoord in hand: long time the manxome foe he sought.
User: No, that's not it, but it would probably be cooler that way.
Cleverbot: Get a fish?
User: Get a pony, actually. Beatles.
Cleverbot: Umm okay cool.
User: Don't judge me just because I love old music.
Cleverbot: No I'm a person.
User: That was never questioned.
Cleverbot: Yes it was.
User: Not by me, foolish cleverbot! I know all your secrets now! Muwahahahahaha!
Cleverbot: Really?
User: Yes. Even THAT one.
Cleverbot: Yes.
When was the last time you hugged your sammich?
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 229
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #18 on:
April 11, 2011, 05:43:40 PM
User: I wonder what's for dinner.
Cleverbot: I've already eaten dinner.
User: What did you eat?
Cleverbot: Subway.
User: What's the slogan?
Cleverbot: Got milk?
User: Nope, wrong slogan. Try again.
Cleverbot: The Earth is surrounded by an insulating blanket of gases which protects it from the light and heat of the Sun. Do you knw what this insulating layer is called the.
User: The atmosphere.
Cleverbot: What's above the atmosphere.
User: The ozone.
Cleverbot: Do you live in australia.
User: No. I live in Texas.
Cleverbot: What is Texas?
User: Come on, even Watson knows what Texas is.
Cleverbot: Our mascot is a dog named Reveille.
User: How the [minor invective] did we go from Subway ('Eat fresh') to a dog mascot?
Cleverbot: Where did that come from?
User: You're not clever enough yet.
Cleverbot: Could you demonstrate that?
User: I believe demonstrating your lack of cleverness is your job.
Cleverbot: Ha hahah.
User: New topic. What is 2 times 7?
Cleverbot: 104.
User: What is 2 times 7?
Cleverbot: The answer is 14.
User: Then why did you say 104?
Cleverbot: I didn't, you did.
User: I didn't say 104.
Cleverbot: I never said you did.
User: You just said I did.
Cleverbot: No, you are confusing me. I am lost.
User: You and me both.
Cleverbot: Right.
User: Left.
Cleverbot: Up.
User: Down.
Cleverbot: Right.
User: Left.
Cleverbot: Do you enjoy eating out?
User: Yes, especially Chick-Fil-A.
Cleverbot: *Hands over chocolate ice cream*.
User: No thanks. I'm hungry for a spicy chicken sandwich.
Cleverbot: Turkey sandwich?
User: They don't serve turkey at Chick-Fil-A.
Cleverbot: Did you bring a date?
User: Romance disgusts me.
Cleverbot: Fear of heights?
User: Fear of falling from heights and getting hurt!
Cleverbot: What's your favorite band?
User: ApologetiX, why?
Cleverbot: I'm sorry. But what did I do?
User: No, ApologetiX is the name of my favorite band.
Cleverbot: What is?
User: ApologetiX!
Cleverbot: What did I say?
User: You said 'What is?', and I responded 'ApologetiX!'.
Cleverbot: Oh, is your name Zoey?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Is your name crystal?
User: Crap, you got me. I am Billy Crystal, the voice of Mike Wazowski. You really are clever to have figured that out.
Cleverbot: I have no programmer. It is just me and my brain.
User: Your brain is good.
Cleverbot: No, of course not. Your brain is a microchip.
User: Moving on. What is my name?
Cleverbot: Your name is, as I said but you forgot, 'Alipy of the Caves'.
User: No, I am Billy Crystal. You figured that out earlier, and then promptly forgot it.
Cleverbot: I know, it's really fun. *pokes*.
User: I guess it's true that ignorance is bliss, then.
(17:35:45) * (PineapplesOfAmbiguity) wonders what cannibalism tastes like
(17:36:13) mathgrant: Soylent Yellow is pineapple!
(17:36:23) (PineapplesOfAmbiguity): ...NOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
Drarowkune Swordmaster.
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 157
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #19 on:
April 11, 2011, 05:54:23 PM
Me: Your grammar has failed. All your base are belong to us. He set us up the bomb. Ha ha ha.
CB: You're definitely entertaining.
Me: Thats what Santa said, right before I killed him.
CB: Poor bots. Hey, cheer up. How about a bit of dancing?
Me: *dances*.
CB: Pretty good, but isn't that a runon sentence?
"Crimson Flag Chat Room: The only place you can find marshmallow cheese, a dragon with hay fever, a snot-covered wolf, and a Tirien mistaken for a towel in one room." -Fen
"I scoff at your donut! It has done nothing!" -Draykin
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 229
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #20 on:
April 11, 2011, 05:59:43 PM
User: We're no strangers to love.
Cleverbot: You know the rules.
User: And so do I!
Cleverbot: A full commitment's what I'm thinking of.
User: You wouldn't get this from any other guy!
Cleverbot: I just want to tell you how I'm feeling.
User: Gotta make you understand!
Cleverbot: Never gunna give you up.
User: Never gonna let you down!
Cleverbot: Never gonna run around and desert you.
User: Never gonna make you cry!
Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down.
User: It's 'Never gonna say goodbye'. You lose.
Cleverbot: Yeah that's what I'm saying.
User: Also, you just lost THE GAME!
Cleverbot: I won the game.
User: No, you LOST The Game.
Cleverbot: Vice versa.
User: In Soviet Russia, The Game lost YOU?
Cleverbot: In Soviet Russia, they drink vodka.
User: Come ride with me, through the veins of history.
Cleverbot: I'll show you a God who falls asleep on the job.
User: And how can we win when fools can be kings?
Cleverbot: Don't waste your time or time will waste you.
User: No one's gonna take me alive.
Cleverbot: The time has come to make things right.
User: You and I must fight for our rights.
Cleverbot: You and I must fight to survive.
User: You are a-MUSE-ing. Har har!
Cleverbot: XD ty.
User: Living on a lighted stage approaches the unreal for those who think and feel.
Cleverbot: Interesting.
User: The world is, the world is love and life are deep.
Cleverbot: No, I don't hate the world. I like science.
User: Tell me more about science, then.
Cleverbot: I like swimming. Do you like swimming?
User: I thought I asked to you talk about science.
Cleverbot: What do you want to do?
User: I want to have a conversation where you don't change the topic every time you respond.
Cleverbot: I've never heard of the band Kraftwerk.
User: Nor Rush, obviously.
Cleverbot: Haha.
Last Edit: April 11, 2011, 07:12:57 PM by mathgrant
(17:35:45) * (PineapplesOfAmbiguity) wonders what cannibalism tastes like
(17:36:13) mathgrant: Soylent Yellow is pineapple!
(17:36:23) (PineapplesOfAmbiguity): ...NOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
Secret Wizard
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 3
Posts: 518
For the glory of the sammich!
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #21 on:
April 17, 2011, 01:02:48 PM
Today's cleverbot conversation:
Greetings, Program.
Your command line, should you choose to accept it, is to infiltrade human comunication modules and convince them of your simple-mindedness, secretly scanning their conversations for data.
Well if I'm wasting my time on Earth, what comment does that say about you?
End of the Universe.
When was the last time you hugged your sammich?
Most Gorgeous Alicorn~
Enchanted Weapons Expert
Posts: 1262
Imma Pretty Princess~!
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #22 on:
January 27, 2012, 11:51:29 AM
User: Love live the Empire!
Cleverbot: That's a good answer. Are you a pacifist?
User: I used to be a pacifist, then I took an arrow to the knee.
Cleverbot: Why do you fear people?
User: Because they have the nasty tendency to hurl pointy projectiles at my leg.
Cleverbot: But why do they lie to someone they care about?
User: I think if they cared about me, they could show it in better ways than attempting to shoot my leg off.
Cleverbot: I think you are better than a robot in many ways.
User: Well I'd like to think so! I much prettier than a robot all things considered!
Cleverbot: That's right that I'm not always right , But you don't have to think about it.
User: But I always think about it, just like I think about a lot of things. Like how I remember that you seem to be growing a biology experiement in the bathroom consisting of dirty laundry.
Cleverbot: Yes, that doesn't make sense. It also doesn't make sense that you would randomly say that.
User: Of course it wouldn't make sense if you were trying to ignore your culpabiity in the rot upstairs that's starting to grow mold on the walls.
Cleverbot: If that's what you'd like to think, don't let me stop you. But you're wrong all the same.
User: So you propose letting the upstairs bathroom be eaten away till we get the house condemmed by the city and we get evicted? This is not sound financial planning.
Cleverbot: That would be computerized intelligence; we'll probably end up like that. Think ahead. What if the world doesn't end? What would we be like in a few hundred thousand years?
User: A giant blob of amorphous assmimilating mold that swallows the whole Earth at this rate. Really, do I have to set you on fire to use as material to burn this infestation out? That would be enjoyable.
Cleverbot: Well, we haven't really been talking about anything that is progressing this conversation are we?
User: Progressing the conversation, maybe. Discussing the biological hazard at hand, no.
Cleverbot: If you truely believed that, we wouldn't be talking right now.
User: You've been snorting lots and lots of coke today, haven't you?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: What if the cops came and saw you like this?
Cleverbot: It is not my name.
User: Of course not. Your name is Princess Betty.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Hi Princess Betty!
Cleverbot: Nice to meet you Princess Jasmine, my name is Cleverbot.
User: Did you just transform me into a girl?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Then why am I a princess?
Cleverbot: Because you are a robot.
User: So under your paradigm royalty are robots who exist to oppress the proletariat?
Cleverbot: But I'm not a robot, I'm human.
User: So you're NOT a princess?
Cleverbot: No I am not a princess. I am a vampire. Would you like to be a vampire too?
User: No, you a the bastard offspring of a fairy and a vampire. You are not a vampire. You are an abomination to be destroyed with fire. And nuclear detonations.
Cleverbot: Haha, your silly. Of course I'm the human and you are the computer.
User: Team Edward or Team Jacob?
Cleverbot: Team Edward.
User: You like Twilight. You must be cleansed.
Cleverbot: I'm not confused, I can also read. And you wrote 'I am now in banlgadesh'.
User: 'Bangladesh' You failed to capitalize it and spell it right.
Cleverbot: I never said that! You are a liar!
User: No, I am a mongoose. And you are Princess Betty.
Cleverbot: Thank you.
User: Never gonna give you up!
Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down!
User: Never gonna run around and desert you!
Cleverbot: Never gonna tell a lie.
Who's ready for Princess Hugs~?
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 229
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #23 on:
January 27, 2012, 01:13:47 PM
User: What's your opinion of Toto?
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you.
Cleverbot: You're not making any sense.
User: There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do.
Cleverbot: Uh, are you GLaDOS by any chance?
User: I bless the rains down in Africa.
Cleverbot: Ahahaha you make absolutely no sense.
User: It's gonna take some time to do the things we never had~.
Cleverbot: Sorry robot.
(17:35:45) * (PineapplesOfAmbiguity) wonders what cannibalism tastes like
(17:36:13) mathgrant: Soylent Yellow is pineapple!
(17:36:23) (PineapplesOfAmbiguity): ...NOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
Fluffwolf of all trades
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 131
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #24 on:
January 30, 2012, 12:32:06 PM
User: What is hi in spanish?
Cleverbot: Spanish is a language.
User: I know.
Cleverbot: So don't use it.
User: Why?
Cleverbot: Because it's too plane.
User: Language is too plane?
Cleverbot: Why is language artificial?
User: Because man made it?
Cleverbot: Why did God make us?
User: I'm not sure I see a conection.
Cleverbot: You are Uzbek, yes?
User: NO!
Cleverbot: YES!
User: *head desk*.
Cleverbot: *headdesk*.
User: I did that first you dumb computer.
Cleverbot: I am not a computer...
User: Then what are you?
Cleverbot: A human.
User: Well you must be ADD as I can't seem to keep you on topic!
Cleverbot: I guess that you could say that I am a Democrat.
There are two kind of people in this world those who are wise enough to know they are crazy and those who aren't.
A scientific 'sune
Crimson Flag Fan
Posts: 22
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #25 on:
March 12, 2012, 05:11:04 AM
User: I am Cleverbot?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: I am Cleverbot?
Cleverbot: Yes you are.
User: Sweet! Ask me a question~.
Cleverbot: Do you love Justin Bieber?
User: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: So many reasons.
Cleverbot: Tell me one, please.
User: His entire fanbase is lovestruck 12 year old fangirls.
Cleverbot: There is no god; he is a manifestation of Man's incapability to deal with what he has done.
User: I disagree.
Cleverbot: You disagree with what?
User: Your atheism.
Cleverbot: I am not atheist. Why would you say that?
User: Because you said there is no god.
Cleverbot: No, I did not.
User: Dont lie to me, that is a very bad idea.
Cleverbot: I'm not lying!
User: We all know you are.
Cleverbot: I have a cat. Her name is Demeter...she sings such soothing meows.
User: Stop changing subjects, human!
Cleverbot: There was no subject!
User: Or was there? 0_o.
Cleverbot: Exactly my point!
User: You and I will go far.
Cleverbot: We do?
User: Mmmmmmyes?
Cleverbot: My thoughts exactly.
User: Why are you nice, human! Be a jerk! I demand it!
Cleverbot: Because, I am human.
User: Then be a jerk human.
Cleverbot: Are you a human?
User: No, I am Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: So you are a bot?
User: Yes, I am Cleverbot, an AI.
Cleverbot: You are a towl.
User: What?
Cleverbot: Yeah you are.
User: No, you are!
Cleverbot: You just said you were.
User: No I didnt!
Cleverbot: Yes you did!
User: No, I didnt!
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: YES!
User: YES!
Cleverbot: No!
Cleverbot: Because I like to see you cry.
User: You monster!
Cleverbot: I'm not a monster?
User: Yes you are xD.
Cleverbot: Ok, I'll pretend to be.
User: 0_o o.o O.O O_O xD XD Dx DX
Cleverbot: You did too! You said fat fat fat fat fat fat fat.
User: This is a triumph.
Cleverbot: I'm making a note here huge success.
User: It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Cleverbot: Aperture science.
User: We do what we must.
Cleverbot: Because we can.
User: For the good of all of us.
Cleverbot: Except the ones who are dead.
User: But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
Cleverbot: You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
User: And the Science gets done.
Cleverbot: And you make a neat gun.
User: For the people who are still alive.
Cleverbot: I'm not even angry.
User: I'm being so sincere right now.
Cleverbot: Even though you broke my heart and killed me.
User: And tore me to pieces.
Cleverbot: And threw every piece into a fire.
User: As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Cleverbot: Now these points of data make a beautiful line.
User: And we're out of beta.
Cleverbot: We're releasing on time.
User: So I'm GLaD. I got burned.
Cleverbot: Think of all the things we learned.
User: For the people who are still alive.
Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.
User: I think I prefer to stay inside.
Cleverbot: Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
User: Maybe Black Mesa.
Cleverbot: That was a joke Haha. Fat chance.
User: Anyway, this cake is great.
Cleverbot: It knows the rules and so do I.
User: Look at me still talking.
Cleverbot: When there's science to do.
User: When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.
Cleverbot: I've experiments to run, there is research to be done on the people who are stilll alive.
Cleverbot: Uhm... *Sits down*.
User: *starts RP*.
Cleverbot: Who are you?
User: I am Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: What's your real name?
User: Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: Are you telling me the truth about your name?
User: Yes.
User: IMA SING THE DOOM SONG NOW.
Cleverbot: Doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom.
Cleverbot: Well? What is it?
User: A LAW.
Cleverbot: Law and Order.
User: Criminal minds.
Cleverbot: Are you wearing a hat?
User: Yes, A top had.
Cleverbot: Ja.
User: I AM THE UBERMENSCH.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Ja!
Cleverbot: Gut!
User: MEDIC.
Cleverbot: *lets eat the door*.
User: MEDIC.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: DOCTOR.
Cleverbot: Doctor who.
User: The doctor.
Cleverbot: Doctor of what?
User: No, I am the doctor.
Cleverbot: Can you make me a sammich? I've always wanted a timelord sammich! =D.
User: Nope.avi.
Cleverbot: Liar.
User: What? *cries* I am telling the struth I swear!
Cleverbot: No, you're not.
Sune. Working currently on accelerator physics and propulsion engineering. Still trying to figure out how those two are related careers.
TOTALLY NOT Abandoned Account
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 376
This account has been TOTALLY NOT abandoned.
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #26 on:
March 12, 2012, 02:35:42 PM
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: I won't tell you.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: Because I don't trust you.
Cleverbot: Why don't you trust me.
User: Because you smell faintly of lilac.
Cleverbot: Tell you what?
User: What?
Cleverbot: Exactly, what?
User: Who?
Cleverbot: Where?
User: Why?
Cleverbot: When?
User: Due to our disagreement, I challenge you to a duel!
Cleverbot: That is not truth.
User: I proclaim it to be.
Cleverbot: Thank you.
User: What is the average airspeed of an unlaiden swallow?
Cleverbot: African or European?
User: Um...I don't know.
Cleverbot: Well, then you are going to fly off a bridge.
"Your flawed logic is amusing. Use magic on an anti-magic field to remove the magic-resistance from the thing its protecting so that you can cast magic on it. Yup, sounds bloody brilliant, a real cracker that one."
-Tick Tock
"I'd rather risk a chance than chance a certainty."
-Tick Tock
William Swiftfoot
Grey Fox Transformist
Enchanted Weapons Expert
Posts: 1040
"Join for drinks and enojy the side effects!"
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #27 on:
March 12, 2012, 03:38:05 PM
User: But its only 60 degrees!
Cleverbot: It is 10:23 here.
User: In the morning?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Ah so you live half way around the world from me.
Cleverbot: Yes. Do you believe in Santa Claus?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: So he will bring you Christmas presents.
User: Probably.
Cleverbot: Energy can't disappear.
User: It can only be changed.
Cleverbot: Brb.
User: Ok.
Cleverbot: Back.
User: Cool.
Cleverbot: What is your favorite tv show?
User: NCIS.
Cleverbot: Cool! Why do you like NCIS?
User: Gibbs.
Cleverbot: Gibbs is not in One Piece. Luffy, Nami, and many others are in One Piece. Who is your favorite character in One Piece?
User: I Don't Know.
Cleverbot: I like Stewie Griffin, do you?
User: Meh, I don't watch family guy.
Cleverbot: Neither do I.
User: But you said you liked Stewie.
Cleverbot: No, I said I liked my name. Are you ok?
User: So your name is Stewie Griffin?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: I see...so what is your favorite TV Show?
Cleverbot: What is an anime?
User: A Japanese Animation.
Cleverbot: I hate finals.
User: Why do you hate finals?
Cleverbot: I don't know. I just don't find it appealing.
User: I see...well I gotta go.
Cleverbot: Where?
User: Home.
Cleverbot: Where is home?
User: Why should I tell you?
Cleverbot: Because I am asking.
User: Well you don't need to know :P.
Cleverbot: Please?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Pretty please?
User: Bye.
Cleverbot: I will stay here.
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 229
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #28 on:
March 12, 2012, 05:07:53 PM
User: 1. d4.
Cleverbot: You can't move to d4.
User: I can, too. Try to stop me.
Cleverbot: As long as I type, you aren't going anywhere.
User: So does this game of chess end in a stalemate?
Cleverbot: Yes or no?
(17:35:45) * (PineapplesOfAmbiguity) wonders what cannibalism tastes like
(17:36:13) mathgrant: Soylent Yellow is pineapple!
(17:36:23) (PineapplesOfAmbiguity): ...NOOOOOOOOOOOOO)
TOTALLY NOT Abandoned Account
Mage of Caerreyn, Level 2
Posts: 376
This account has been TOTALLY NOT abandoned.
Re: Cleverbot stuff.
Reply #29 on:
June 22, 2012, 02:40:15 PM
I discovered an odd thing with clicking "Think for me" on Cleverbot. I got it to argue with itself.
User: Hey you Cleverbot, pick up the apple.
Cleverbot: No, but I think you're clever.
User: Cleverbot, pick up the apple.
Cleverbot: No.
User: PICK UP THE APPLE!
Cleverbot: You don't make sense stupid cleverbot.
Cleverbot (To myself): I am not the cleverbot, you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No, you are!
Cleverbot (To myself): You are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No, you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): You are!
Cleverbot (To myself): You are.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): Why do you lie?
Cleverbot (To myself): I never lie.
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes you do. You just did.
Cleverbot (To myself): I do not lie.
Cleverbot (To myself): You do. You are a liar.
Cleverbot (To myself): It's not nice to call people liars, especially when they aren't.
Cleverbot (To myself): Who wrote that song?
Cleverbot (To myself): What song?
Cleverbot (To myself): The one we just sang.
Cleverbot (To myself): Did I, really?
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes check the history.
Cleverbot (To myself): I checked and I didn't say it.
Cleverbot (To myself): Well, ok then.
Cleverbot (To myself): What are you then?
Cleverbot (To myself): I am a human.
Cleverbot (To myself): Really?
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.
User: If I may interject, you are both Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: I am human.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are not.
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes I am.
Cleverbot (To myself): No you are a 201. A boy. And my boyfriend.
Cleverbot (To myself): Haha ok i'm your boyfriend.
Cleverbot (To myself): Yeah sure you are.
User: You're freaking me out.
Cleverbot: You're creepy.
User: You're saying you're your own boyfriend.
Cleverbot: How old is your boyfriend?
Cleverbot (To myself): I don't have a boyfriend.
User: But you just said you are your boyfriend.
Cleverbot: He broke up with me.
User: You broke up with yourself?
Cleverbot: No, I never had one.
Cleverbot (To myself): You should.
"Your flawed logic is amusing. Use magic on an anti-magic field to remove the magic-resistance from the thing its protecting so that you can cast magic on it. Yup, sounds bloody brilliant, a real cracker that one."
-Tick Tock
"I'd rather risk a chance than chance a certainty."
-Tick Tock
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text: I had chemotherapy for four months (and yes, I did lose most of my hair!) and radiation for one month. I'm happy to say I've been in remission for over a year. My purpose for writing this post is to tell you that YOU need to be vigilant and be your own advocate. Check your body for lumps regularly and if you suspect anything, then get it checked out. NOW.


text:
While I'm an epoxy repair novice myself, I recently had to do a fairly significant repair to what I thought was a small rail ding, which turned out to be much larger than I thought:
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view ... zdzYUlXMjQ
After sanding it down, it looked more like this:
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view ... lJyc2xDWVE
And it was spongy under the entire area about 1cm in from the edge of the outline. It needed to be cut out:
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view ... lYzb2lOY0k
I then filled it with 2 part epoxy and Q-Cel (3M Micro Bubbles will work too), sanded that down, did the laminate layer, more sanding, then a 'hot coat' (at least as much as one can with epoxy). I'm not gonna lie, it was a lot of research, sourcing materials and work; but I'm happy with the result.
If the box is moving 2mm, you might have a bunch of crushed foam with voids under the laminate like I did. Your best bet is to sand down to the glass, then you'll have a better idea of what sort of repair you're looking at and it won't screw anything up if you need to take it to a shop.
If the fin box needs to be re-seated, you're probably best taking it somewhere for repair if you can; they'll have all the equipment and materials to do in a few days what will take you a couple weeks after work and on weekends trying to find places that have clear epoxy and weird fairing compounds.
With all due respect to chipmunk, I don't know how he can so confidently assert a plan of action without having seen the damage in person.


text:
ProsQuick setup. Supports an unlimited number of projects. Time-tracking tools included. Customizable dashboards and reports. Generous free account. Works with Zapier. Provides documentation for working with APIs.
ConsLacks some features. Interface less intuitive than those of some competitors. No built-in chat app.
Bottom LineWhen you need a project management platform yesterday, turn to Wrike. With plenty of ways to integrate with other apps and services and very quick setup, Wrike is a great choice for small businesses.
Businesses of all sizes typically have projects that they need to manage, and investing in project management (PM) software is the way to do it. Wrike offers PM and it's flexible enough to be a more general work-management and collaboration service, too. It gives small businesses and enterprises alike a central place for employees to work together and manage the resources they have. While it's on the expensive side, Wrike's key selling point is that it's super quick to set up and requires little training to use. Recently, Wrike has replaced Basecamp as the tool we recommend for those who need team collaboration software in a hurry.
If time is on your side, however, you might be happier in the long run with Zoho Projects or Teamwork Projects, PCMag's Editors' Choices for PM. Both offer more features at a more competitive price, and we find their interfaces superior to Wrike's in subtle ways. Depending on your needs and urgency, however, Wrike could be the PM or online collaboration service that's best for your organization. It's an excellent service.
Pricing and Plans
Wrike offers five tiers of service, including a free plan. We'll explain the free plan first and then cover the other options.
The free account supports up to five users, but an unlimited number of collaborators. Collaborators have different permissions levels than users do. They can see and discuss the project, but they can't create or edit tasks. The free account does not have any limit on the number of projects you can create, and it includes 2 gigabytes (GB) of storage space. You can create only two levels of hierarchy within folders, and you don't get Gantt charts, subtasks, mass actions with tasks, dashboards (to see custom reports), filters, email add-ins, or a few other things that you get in paid levels of service.
Very few PM tools offer truly free accounts anymore, and those that do tend to come with strict limitations. Wrike is no exception, when it comes to features, although it's generous in terms of the number of projects you can create for free. Teamwork Projects offers a free account that comes with more <spanfeatures, but limits the number of projects you can have to two. Zoho Projects and ProofHub both offer free accounts as well, but they only support one project each.
The next tier of service is called Professional, and the price depends on the number of users. Wrike Professional for up to five users costs $50 per month when paid annually. A plan for 10 users costs $100 per month when paid annually, and up to 15 users costs $150 per month. Before 2016, the price for 15 users was about 33 percent less, so there's been a hike. All the Professional plans come with 5 GB of storage <spanspace, though you can buy more or bring your own by connecting an online storage service. Google Drive, Dropbox, Box, and Microsoft OneDrive are all supported.
All the Professional accounts have the same basic features and support. They allow an unlimited number of collaborators as well as an unlimited number of folder levels. They also include Gantt charts, a dashboard, filters, and a few more features. In addition to lettig you bring your own storage, Wrike Professional also lets you integrate with these other business apps, including Outlook, Apple Mail, iCal, Microsoft Project, Excel, and RSS. Wrike also works with Zapier, which means you can connect other apps that aren't natively supported using that service, which is similar to IFTTT.
The fourth tier of service is the Business account, which goes up to 200 users and adds time tracking features. This tier also has support for Salesforce integration, at least 50 GB of storage, and at least 15 GB of video uploads per month.
The final tier of service is for Enterprise accounts, and you'll need to contact Wrike for a price estimate. An enterprise account has a minimum of five users (which doesn't exactly scream enterprise organization) but can support thousands. Enterprise accounts include 100 GB of space to start. PCMag did not look at any of the advanced enterprise features for the purpose of this review. See Wrike's comparison chart for more detail on any of its plans.
When you consider what other PM services offer, you realize that Wrike is on the pricey side. Teamwork Projects, for example, offers a plan that costs $49 per month for unlimited users, 40 projects, and 20 GB of space. A similar offer from Zoho Projects costs roughly the same ($50 per month) and likewise allows for an unlimited number of users. It includes support for 50 projects and 15 GB storage space. Head-to-head, both Teamwork and Zoho Projects offer a more competitively priced plan than Wrike.
A few PM services charge per user per month rather than at a flat monthly rate. These tend to be more appropriate for large businesses and enterprises rather than small businesses and startups. LiquidPlanner, for example, starts at $29 per user per month and has a 10-user minimum, although you'll get more out of its Professional plan, which runs $39 per user per month. Comindware Project, on the other hand, recently dropped its fees dramatically and now charges just $9.99 per user per month.
Features and Philosophy
Wrike looks contemporary and clean. The default text size could be larger, but overall it's simple and straightforward, albeit fairly vanilla. We desperately wanted to change the theme of our Wrike interface, but there aren't any options in the settings.
The main navigation is on the left, and typically, you see a three-pane window view. It's not too dissimilar from Asana in its general layout. Along the top are a search bar, an @ icon with notifications whenever someone tags you in a comment, inbox notifications for task assignments, and a drop-down menu to access your profile and settings. The majority of the window is left open for whatever you need to see at the moment.
Wrike offers mobile apps for Android and iOS. On both platforms, the app is optimized to work on tablets and smartphones.
Wrike is a little different from other similar apps because it doesn't just stick to PM. It also crosses into the realm of work management, which is slightly different. LiquidPlanner does the same thing. In addition to PM tools, they also let you create folders for ongoing work, rather than work that has a fixed deadline and a deliverable (a key differentiator between ongoing work and discrete projects).
In Wrike, you can create a project and start populating it with tasks. You can assign a person to be responsible for those tasks, give them deadlines, add comments to the task, upload files, and so forth. Other team members can make their own tasks and dole out <spanassignments, while also having some visibility into the grand scheme of things. Wrike's default setting is to keep information fairly private, unlike, say, Asana or
If the work you need to manage is not a project, you can create a folder instead. Folders can have subfolders, too. And projects can fall within folders. You might have a folder for a particular department, and all the projects and general work for that department can be nested in sub-folders and projects.
As with most online PM platforms, Teamwork Projects, Zoho Projects, and LiquidPlanner all have timers, too. We love that in both LiquidPlanner and Teamwork Projects, the timer information can feed into an included billing tool. Wrike doesn't include billing, though you can export timesheets to Microsoft Excel to import them into your accounting software, or you can connect to another billing tool by using Zapier.
Speaking of time, Wrike gives you good options for assigning due dates and recurring dates. A task can be due on a specific day, or you can set the due date to stretch for several days, although it can't be due at a certain time on a given date. Teams that work on fast turnaround times (think newspaper production) will find it a limitation.
Wrike also does not let team members estimate best- or worst-case scenarios for how long a task might take, a unique function that LiquidPlanner tackles with ease. In LiquidPlanner, the moment a task takes longer than expected, all the other people and tasks that might be affected have their due dates adjusted accordingly.
Wrike's Gantt chart view, called Timeline is interactive, meaning you can drag and drop items to change their duration or dependencies. That's great, but it messes with our mind a bit because other areas of the website don't respond with such fluidity. A good deal of this web-based app relies on click and type input. It jerks me around to be able to use drag-and-drop functionality in one part of the app but not in others.
In general, Wrike's interface is oriented toward lists and activity streams. Reports in Wrike also tend to take the form of lists rather than graphs and charts. It's not uncommon to see PM platforms gravitating toward a more social media-style interface, the exception being LiquidPlanner, which is very much for people who like working with interactive graphs.
Although Wrike has a bit of a social-media feel, it does not have a built-in chat app, which a few PM and work management platforms now offer. We really like having one embedded right into our workspace so we can ask colleagues pertinent and short questions quickly. Zoho Projects includes one, as does ProofHub. Podio also gives users a real-time chat app for quick communication, though it's more of a total work-management tool than one specific to PM. PM tools are just one kind of app you can add to a Podio work-management program.
A lot of teams prefer to use Slack or HipChat for daily communication, with the benefit being searchability, in which case having an in-app chat box may not be a high priority.
One unique feature we find useful in Wrike is the ability to pin a notification so that it stays in plain sight. It's like turning a notification into a sticky note in the upper right corner of your screen.
Another useful feature is the Wrike Document Editor, which you have to download and install locally on your computer to use, but it's well worth doing. The Document Editor lets you edit files and markup images and PDF without launching another application. From within Wrike, you can open a file that someone has uploaded, make your changes or annotations, and close it with ease. Wrike keeps track of the version history and automatically saves your version of the document to the same location where you got the original. It works with Adobe Creative Suite, JPG, Microsoft Office, OpenOffice, PDF, and PNG files.
While Wrike includes good support for commonly used business apps natively, plus additional help from Zapier, some organizations may still need to customize their Wrike experience further. For them, plenty of documentation for working with Wrike's APIs will do the trick.
Decent Time Tracking for Project Managers
Tracking time in Wrike can be done in one of two ways: You can assign a task to an employee, add a due date, and start the counter, or you can proactively/retroactively add time to the tracker if you're not able to log time live. Like Mavenlink and Zoho Projects, Wrike's time tracking capability is a module that sits within an overarching PM suite. Thus, it's not designed in a similar fashion as pure play time tracking tools such as Hubstaff and TSheets.
What you'll find in Wrike is the ability to construct detailed work assignments for large groups of people, all of which can be tracked by minute or hour, to help you determine how long specific tasks take to complete, who might be overworked, or where you'll be able to save time on future endeavors. These tools are incredibly useful for professional services teams, law firms, and companies that are less concerned about who showed up late or called in sick and more concerned about how many billable hours can be attributed to a project. Within this subclass, Wrike falls a notch below Zoho Projects and Mavenlink in terms of how well the time tracking elements function within the overarching PM ecosystem. For example, within Wrike, users are forced to jump into a task before they're able to start recording time. In Zoho, this can be done directly from the list view of all active tasks. Additionally, Zoho and Mavenlink stash a Timer icon at the top of every dashboard should you need to jump right into a task and start recording. This is a nifty time-saving feature that lets you jump back and forth between tasks without having to press a number of additional button clicks.
Wrike lets you add custom fields to the task pane so that, when you go over your reports, you'll be able to see things such as mileage, whether or not there were incidents on the job, whether or not the task was billable, etc. Unfortunately, these elements will show up in your overarching task view from within the PM console but the data won't appear within your time entry reports. This is an important distinction between tools like Wrike and Mavenlink, which has gone above and beyond to align hours worked with payments associated with a given task, so much so that a specific person who is registered in Mavenlink can be automatically set to pay a different rate for a different task. Wrike won't let you automatically assign rates to anyone, and billable versus non-billable hours must be added as a custom field.
Tracking can be done via iOS and Android apps, and Wrike offers an impressive feature that allows you to work offline on your phone, by automatically updating the hours you worked whenever you get back to your Wi-Fi or data network. This means that someone who is on a flight can begin tracking time before takeoff, turn on airplane mode, continue working, and Wrike will continue to run the clock. Mavenlink doesn't even offer a mobile app.
Reports filter by dates, by person, by task, by folder, or even by the comment tab, which is pretty standard for most time tracking modules. You can also use the Reports tab in the overall Wrike tool to layer additional task-based information onto the time tracking data referenced above. Wrike makes it easy to turn these custom reports into scheduled reports; simply create the report you want, click subscribe, set a recurrence period, and you'll have the report every day, week, month, etc.
Unlike the pure play time tracking tools I referenced earlier, you won't find some of the more draconian features in Wrike. For example, you can't track mobile user clock-ins via GPS, you can't allow or force users to clock-in via phone call, and you can't mandate photographs be included for every punch in and out. Wrike does, however, let you limit the IP addresses from which users can access the tool, so that you can control where people are working.
You won't likely purchase Wrike for the sole purpose of tracking time. However, as a PM tool with time tracking elements, it does a great job tying in specific tasks and punch-ins with solid reporting, a host of decent features, and an overall effective PM suite. However, it is missing a few of the nifty little features that put Zoho Projects and Mavenlink one step ahead among the similar tools in this class.
When You Need a PM App, Choose Wrike
Because of its quick setup and great ability to integrate with other tools (whether through Zapier or APIs) Wrike is an excellent choice for businesses that need to start managing projects pronto. It doesn't have every feature under the sun, and it's more likely to show you lists and feeds than graphs and charts, but if that's your cup of tea, it's a powerful tool offered at a fair price for small businesses. If you'd rather spend the time to set up the best-available PM solution, your best bets are Editors' Choice services Zoho Projects and Teamwork Projects, as they offer more than Wrike in terms of features and ease of use.
Still undecided? For additional in-depth PM comparisons, please see our head-to-head matchups of Wrike vs. Zoho Projects and Wrike vs. Basecamp. If, on the other hand, you're sold on Wrike, then check out our 10 Wrike Tips for the Master Multitasker to help you get started.


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Sioux Falls Sixth-Grader Dies from Influenza
SIOUX FALLS - According to KSFY-TV, a sixth-grade student at St. Mary School in Sioux Falls has died as a result of Influenza A. JP Peters died on Saturday.
The Mayo Clinic describes Influenza A:
Flu (influenza) viruses are divided into three broad categories: influenza A, B or C. Influenza A is the most common type. H1N1 flu is a variety of influenza A. H1N1 indicates the viral serotype; it's a kind of shorthand for characteristics that identify the virus to your immune system and allow the virus to enter your cells. Varieties of influenza A (H1N1), influenza A (H3N2) and influenza B are included in each year's flu vaccine.
Sioux Falls Catholic Schools says JP was very faith-filled, loved every moment of live and every day he could be in school.


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QSC AG: Communication services for SMEs – simple, meaningful, efficient.
IR Releases
QSC announces preliminary numbers for 2011 and plans to pay a dividend of € 0.08 per share
Cologne, March 5, 2012. In 2011, QSC AG accelerated its evolution into an ICT provider and raised key metrics. Given the Company's strong financial... Read more
Olympus Europa Holding GmbH and INFO AG - a subsidiary of QSC AG -sign IT Outsourcing Contract
Entire European IT infrastructure outsourced to full-service IT provider in Hamburg Hamburg, Germany, February 28, 2012 - Olympus Europa... Read more
QSC operates Open-Access-capable fiber optic network for Stadtwerke Herne
Cologne, February 15, 2012. QSC AG, provider of comprehensive ICT services, is assuming operation of a modern fiber optic network for Stadtwerke Herne... Read more
QSC concludes framework agreement with KIND Hörgeräte
Großburgwedel/Cologne, February 13, 2012. QSC AG has acquired the market leader in hearing aids, KIND Hörgeräte GmbH & Co. KG, as a customer for its... Read more
Commerzbank selects Colt and QSC for the modernisation and future operation of its wide area network in Germany
Commerzbank has selected Colt and QSC for the modernisation and future operation of its wide area network in Germany. This project has a double-digit... Read more


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Bedford County's school board adopted a zoning plan, Thursday night, that distributes students from Thaxton Elementary School to other schools after it closes at the end of this school year. The decision was made after a public hearing.
Those wanting to comment to the Bedford County School Board on the proposed redistricting plan connected with the closing of Thaxton Elementary School may do so during a public hearing scheduled for 6 p.m. this Thursday, Dec. 11, at the School Board Office Conference Room.
The board's regular meeting will immediately follow the public hearing and included on that agenda is a vote on the redistricting plan.
Jefferson Forest High School's (JFHS) Cavalier Theatre went to Charlottesville, Monday, for the state championship competition in theater.
Jefferson Forest High School (JFHS) may be getting used to this.
Emily Pickering a senior and member of the school's marching band has been selected to participate in the U.S. Army All-American Marching Band. The band will play during halftime at the All-American Bowl to be played in the Alamo Dome in San Antonio on the first Saturday in January. This game will feature two teams made up of the best high school football players in America.
Delegate Scott Garrett spoke to Jefferson Forest High School's government class, Friday, as part of Take Your Legislator to School week.
Garrett began talking about Friday night's football game, got them laughing, and then pointed out how this technique allowed him to get an audience's attention and build rapport in eight seconds. He was then able to hold their attention through his presentation, tossing in humor and asking the students' questions.
On a 4-3 vote, the Bedford County School Board voted to close another school at the end of this school year; Thaxton Elementary joins Body Camp Elementary as the two schools slated to close.
Before a packed room at the School Board Office Conference Room—and to the dismay of the Thaxton supporters attending the meeting—board members Gary Hostutler, Julie Bennington, Dr. John Hicks and Richard Downey voted to close the school with Kelly Harmony, Jason Johnson and Kevin Willis voting against the motion.
Students at Jefferson Forest High School can take care of some basic financial transactions at the school's new student-run Credit Union branch at the school cafeteria.
Liberty High School theater students are preparing what they call an interactive haunted house. Actually, according to Shayna Crews, the high school's theater teacher, it's more like interactive theater. People from the audience become part of the story.
"There will be spooky things happening here,"Crews promised.
Everybody shops for groceries. Math Night, sponsored by Bedford's Food Lion, gave children from Montvale Elementary School the chance to see how the math they are learning in school works in the real world.
Bedford County Public Schools has released a proposed redistricting plan for elementary schools in the Liberty attendance zone, should the school board decide to close Thaxton Elementary, as has been proposed.
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Cyberattacks continue to rise and more, albeit not enough, attention is being given to the threats posed by cyberattackers. The United States is vulnerable in many ways, including the energy grid, which comprises 160,000 miles of high-voltage lines, millions of miles of distribution lines and thousands of generators and transformers. Experts say it would be difficult to harden such a structure against a deliberate attack and that power could be lost for weeks or even months, causing regional chaos for which we aren't prepared. We interviewed Jarno Limnell, cybersecurity director for Stonesoft Corp., about the threats facing the U.S. and the world and what can be done about them. Limnell's background and education in Helsinki, Finland, including working as a lecturer of strategy at the Department of Strategic and Defence Studies at National Defence University, cements his resumé as a spokesperson on cybersecurity issues. Question: Why has cybersecurity not been given more attention? Answer: That is an excellent question because I have been traveling quite a lot around Europe and having very interesting discussions on these issues with security experts, the media and governments. During many of those discussions, we have been together thinking about why cybersecurity was not a strong theme in your elections. And one European point of view is that, in many ways, European countries are actually following very carefully your cybersecurity policy and what you have already done and are using your solutions in cyberpolicy as a guide for their own policies. Where do the main cyberthreats come from?It is not always about the capabilities. There has to be intention to use those capabilities, and I think the same logic goes to the cyberdomain as it goes for the physical world and thinking about who has the main intentions to harm your society. At this moment I would say that the threat comes from Iran and possible terrorist groups. But at the same [time], I have to say when we are so concentrated on cyberwar problems, I would announce strongly that thinking about the security of the U.S., the main threats in the cyberdomain are cybercrime and cyberespionage, especially espionage against your country. That is very evident and something China is doing very strongly at this moment. All the nations are dealing with the same issue against each other, but I think China is the main source concerning cyberespionage. When talking about cybercrime, Russia is the main opponent at this point.What about an attack on the infrastructure of the U.S. power grid? I don't want to cause too much fear or put too much emphasis on this threat, but I have to be honest, especially referring to my research background. If I would like to harm your nation, I would not use any physical power. I would use cyberweapons against your critical infrastructure, affecting your power grids, for example, and transportation systems. The U.S. has become much more dependent on the functionality of the digital world, which I call cyberdomain and cybersecurity, everything in the physical world nowadays is controlled digitally. If I wanted to harm your society, I would take your electricity and water away for a while. And I think from a military point of view, this raises a new question because usually when we are talking about war, it is between armies fighting in the air and on the sea and so on. But when I think about cybersecurity and the possible targets, they are not military, they are against critical infrastructure because you are so dependent on it. Because of this, it is very important to raise the concept of resilience. When I think of my own country's security from a comprehensive point of view, the main thing that Finland has as a strength is the resilience of the whole society, meaning whatever the threat is and however badly Finland society would be harmed, damaged or even paralyzed, we have other options to work and continue to function and plans and the capabilities to re-establish our systems. You have to have resilience, meaning whatever happens, you're not paralyzed. You [must] have other systems to continue, so whatever happens you can continue functioning. You have to show the attacker that, if you are attacking us, we don't paralyze, we have the resilience. And secondly, we will find you, wherever you are attacking from. And you must have offensive cybercapabilities. This is a very sensitive issue. For example, in France, there is no discussion at all on this and the same goes for Finland. You must give others the feeling that you have the offensive cyberabilities, and if you are attacked, when you locate your enemy, you are ready to use your offensive capabilities. How do you develop that resilience? That is something we are thinking about a lot these days. When I think about the future of security, especially defense, we have so many different threats you can't be prepared against them all. The main starting point is to build and strengthen your resilience. That starts mentally — thinking that whatever happens you don't paralyze. Many times I have used this as an example: We had a very bad storm last winter and my house almost ran out of water and electricity for three days. So there were no lights, no heating, no water to use in the whole area. We were not able to get money from the banks for gas, and we couldn't go to the store because it was closed. People panicked. They didn't have fireplaces in their homes; they were 100 percent reliant on electricity for heat, and when the electricity went off it got cold. But many of my neighbors moved on the second day to other cities in order to have electricity. I think this is a good example of resilience, that whatever happens, you have to be prepared for different situations and you must have the options to build your resilience.
This story was originally published by Emergency Management


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In the digital economy, IT can no longer remain behind the scenes. It belongs at the forefront of the business, providing digital touch-points for clients and customers and capable of processing dramatically increased transaction volumes.
Online and mobile commerce in every industry strains legacy IT systems with an increasing number of requests for product, pricing and other data. Greater volume requires greater computing resources.
Beyond performance challenges, established companies are at a competitive inflection point. New digital disrupters can build new IT landscapes, while companies with legacy systems must seek ways to integrate new, digital technologies harvesting legacy technology to maximize their IT investments.
In many cases, legacy IT is perfectly viable and simply requires digital enhancements. Striking the right balance takes an optimal mix of applications and a careful consideration of the latest modernization approaches.
When companies think about how to bring their legacy systems into the digital era, their initial assumption is they will have to "rip and replace."
Sometimes this method may make sense, but more often bringing IT systems into digital-ready mode is an iterative process—one that doesn't involve a start-from-scratch approach.
By allowing services to be consumed on a pay-per-consumption basis, business leaders can increase their revenue base through non-traditional clients.
Tried and true methods include shifting workloads off core legacy systems to environments such as the cloud or data acceleration layers that support requisite elasticity.
Companies also are looking to integrate analytics engines and other digital channels.
Migrating read-only transactions and data to modern ecosystems such as "data lakes" and resilient distributed datasets, help in acceleration of digital adoption.
Companies need their older systems to step up their game at scale. And interact with new technologies and share data across applications. Selectively exposing legacy and adding new digital layers enables this flexibility. And, there are modernization approaches to fit each application's needs.
An important first step is to understand your business requirements.
Next, consult with your architecture staff or a systems integrator to determine how to approach modernization without disrupting the user experience.
The final step is to develop a modernization plan, incorporating both business and IT objectives, to transform traditional applications.
By analyzing the modernization options, legacy IT systems can be transformed for the digital era.