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The night after Christmas scrolling thru photographs…
December 27, 2016
It's Monday night, the night after Christmas. In case you didn't see the family photo tagged with our location, we traveled over the holiday. I told the world and myself I wanted us to have a chance to reconnect as a family. Truth is, it was all about spending some time with my boy, my sixteen year old son.These days, he walks out the door more frequently than he walks in. I spend too much time wondering every time I hear a car drive by or a siren shriek.
I've finished unpacking, almost finished unpacking, well, I've started unpacking and can say that all of my shoes are where they belong.
I'm scrolling thru Facebook, and I see all the happy family photos. My heart swells with pride at the likes under ours taken by a very kind, patient hostess. We are standing in front of a fireplace, arms linked, smiling.
It wasn't really like that at all.
Well, parts of it were. There was tubing down Cranmore with C, legs linked, tires spinning. I screamed, he laughed.
There was s'mores by the fire after a sleigh ride. My daughter sat next to my son. He went into the lodge and got her hot chocolate.
There were the moments before we had to leave for the sleigh ride, when his dad had to stuff his feet into his brand new boots because he didn't want to go.
There were arguments over phone chargers, pillows, homework, bad language, and whether or not one should stay in a jacuzzi for an hour at a time.
In other words, it was like being on a vacation with a toddler that has far more words and muscle at his disposal when he wants to take a stand.
On our way home, we stopped by the outlet store. He walked over to me, held out his arms and pulled me close. He said- "I'm glad I came. I had fun."
He finds joy in a Nike store, and bliss when he knows that moments after we leave he will be swaddled in a new Nike sweatshirt and sweat pants.
I've probably crossed the line here, but I'm giving myself a pass this time.
I've decided it is time to stop rambling on about the challenges we face.
They are his challenges now, He deserves privacy to be who he's going to be and figure out what he needs to figure out.
I will take a step back to find my place in the audience while my son goes about becoming a man.
It won't be easy.
I remember wondering if things would have been different if I'd read him more bed time stories or made him join Boy Scouts.
You reminded me that one less chapter of Harry Potter, or four more camping trips probably wouldn't have made a bit of difference.
Some of you let me know you are dealing with some of the same problems; and that you are as lost and confused as I am.
Sometimes it's incredibly easy to feel totally isolated, in a room full of people, in a community of millions, at the dinner table with family.
We are as connected as we allow ourselves to be. We are not alone.
Neither is he.
I hope he figures that out.
The Verge, Some Holiday Thoughts on Upward Mobility and The Importance of Christmas Music
December 22, 2015
This is the holiday season. I don't need to tell you that. The songs on the radio are carols, everyone at work is counting down days and feasting on cookies, kids are looking for elves on shelves and parents are wondering why they ever started another tradition that involves one more thing do during the season that demands the most of parents of young ones.
I've wanted to write about the holidays. I've tried to say something meaningful about slowing down and finding the spirit. I was going to talk about decorating our tree.
We didn't decorate our tree. My husband dragged it in one night while we slept. He strung the lights while I was working. My daughter hung ornaments with a friend of hers while they were trying to decide what movie to download. My contribution was to straighten out the tipsy angel, and sweep, daily, the tinsel, that seems to be growing, like sweet potato vines all over the first floor. I sweep, it slithers down and creeps along carpet while I sleep. I sweep again. The dog finds the whole process weird.
I shopped for the first time yesterday. An eleven year old and a fifteen year old, both of whom just got new smart phones a month ago. $600 smart phones we will be paying off while we are trying to figure out how to send them to community college because we don't have any money.
If the holidays aren't enough to make me crazy, I'm always on the verge of something.
I'm on the verge of everything.
I'm on the verge of killing my son, throwing him out onto the street with a bus pass and a back pack. I'm on the verge of falling at his feet and begging him to just watch one episode of the Middle with me. Like the good old days. He smiles, I think- what has he done now. He grimaces- I wonder- what have I done? I'm constantly cataloging our conversations, expressions, text messages and I've reached no conclusions other than he is my son, and he is a complete mystery to me, and I really, really hope he knows I love him more than my own breath.
About a month ago, I asked my boss where I was heading, in a general way. I've been at the same job a year, my title has nothing to do with the job I do every day. I've been hoping for a new one, or a title, and a little more money. Tomorrow, we are having lunch at a nice restaurant. I can't imagine he would take me to a nice restaurant to give me good news.
I'm going to the gym every day, and I'm eating cake, and large bowls of pasta, and putting cream in my coffee. So I guess I can't say I'm on the verge of getting in shape. But I do go to the gym every single day, and walk the dog, and take the stairs. I look up healthy recipes and I think about them. So maybe that qualifies.
Today, I drove my son to school to talk to the principal about an argument my son had with a fellow student. I picked up some Christmas presents for my nieces. I spoke to some students and reached out to one organization and two high schools about working together, me and them, to help more kids come to Quincy College. I went to Marketing for cookies and the Registrar's office for sandwiches. Based on my conversation with my colleagues, I am the only person in the world that hasn't finished shopping. I ate too many cookies and had a cup of soup.
Today I sprinted thru being on the verge of bribing an assistant principle, spending grocery money on really, really nice tee shirts, and getting a serious stomach ache. Thankfully, none of that happened.
I made it to my therapist's appointment where we discussed the anxiety of the holidays, and since I was in a rush, we made it quick. She wrote me a prescription. I am not on the verge of a nervous breakdown or I'm too well medicated to notice.
I raced home. Katy had a friend over to practice for their flute holiday concert this evening. I made them dinner while they mangled "Oh Holy Night." I had a glass of wine, and served them two huge bowls of spaghetti. While they ate, I gathered my clothes for the gym. I wiped counters. I kissed the dog and promised her we'd walk before the rain came.
We got to the concert. Katy and Madeleine played first. I'd warned Madeleine's mom, "they weren't very good." I asked Madeleine's dad to tape them on his Iphone.
The girls played "Joy to The World" and "We Three Kings".
They played beautifully. I sat on my metal chair and looked at them, poised and still in front of the music stand. I have never heard such beautiful music in my life.
I didn't want to write my boss an email. I didn't want to go the mall, or walk the dog, or lift a weight, or climb the corporate, or any sort of ladder.
My girl brought me Christmas.
It is eight pm. Sophie is at my feet. She will take me outside to look at the lights. I won't count my steps, I won't check my heart rate. I will pick up her poop, and I will let her sniff that weird patch of grass on Wood Street for as long as she'd like.
I'm inside my life. I share it with horrid, funny, magical kids, a husband that remembers a tree in the middle of his shift, and picks out the best one, the college, where my supervisors, students and colleagues teach me something new every day. Sometimes, the lessons get a little redundant. I think I'm pretty clear on the importance of patience in world of academia, but I'll know when I know.
The month of December seems to be a time where too many people live on the verge- of losing their minds, going bankrupt, trying to keep up with the neighbors, smacking their kids, or wishing they'd never fallen in love.
From this moment forth, I've stepped away from the verge, and I'm not going anywhere near it. If I shop, it will be without a list. If I buy gifts, it will be because I'd like to give something to someone I love.
I'm not even sure what verge means any more. Maybe it's when I choose something, horrible or amazing, to swallow up my entire focus. While I wait- I eat too much, I snarl at kittens or kids, I check my email, I scroll thru Facebook to glare at people who do not seem to be on the verge, while reassuring myself that Facebook lies and almost everyone is on the verge of something. Even if they don't know it.
I do know, by definition, to be "on the verge" implies resting one foot on one spot, a less than desirable spot, while the other foot hovers and waits for a better space to open up.
That's seems pretty silly.
I'm home now.
I'm blessed.
I'm pretty sure Colin loves me, and if he doesn't at the moment, he'll remember soon enough. I love him. I love so many people, and I'm so lucky that in the middle of this life, I've made enough space to know them.
The rest will come.
Right now, everything I want and need is here. I'm not waiting on anything.
The rest will come.
Bangs, Infinity and Shades of Blue
December 29, 2014
I have never been a woman that accessorized. I lose earrings. Bracelets get caught in my steering wheel. And every time I change my bag, I lose my license. Or a credit card. Or my favorite lipstick.
Six months ago, something happened. I "stole" a scarf from my 11 year old daughter. The scarf had been hanging around a teddy bears neck since her 8th birthday party so don't judge me too harshly. I liked wearing it. It was like Jacob's coat of many colors except it was a scarf. And it went with everything. It had many colors. I felt like a grown up. I felt like I could guest host a talk show. I felt "put together."
Next, a friend passed on a scarf, or shawl, or pashmina, a large piece of cloth intended for draping around the upper half of the body. I liked wearing that too, though I still haven't quite figured out what to do with it. Most of the time, I put it over my head if it's raining. Once I get inside, I fold it into a triangle and pretend I'm a woman in need of a rocking chair. Which often I am.
For Christmas, I got two infinity scarves. Are you familiar with this latest rage sweeping the nation? (I think it's been a few years, but I don't get to the hair salon very often. The last Vogue I read was from 2012. I think they might have used the term revolutionary. Or maybe they were talking about a new kind of bang. As in short cropped hair on the forehead. There are a lot of revolutions in the world of accessories and hair. Not just the kind that grows on your head but that's a whole 'nother story. I need to go to the salon more.)
They are both blue, my new Christmas infinity scarves. One is turquoise blue, the other is a royal blue. They both go with almost everything I own, especially when framed by my very favorite jean jacket. Which is denim blue. (Duh, you are thinking. No, I'm telling you. Denim is not necessarily the color of denim any more. It was hard to find a denim colored denim jacket.)
I like them. I, who have never worn any accessories, except for brief binges on earrings, an intense love affair with a wrist cuff, and a series of flirtations in my late 30's with a series of hair ornaments, have embraced the scarf. For the time being. The patchwork scarf I stole from my daughter. The burnt orange hand me down from my dear friend that I have yet to define. And the two Christmas gifts in the most beautiful shades of blue. Infinity scarfs.
The givers knew me well. The scarves are circular, so there is no draping or tying or folding to be done. It is not likely they will slip into my coffee or dangle in my soup.
And I need to eat more soup. I've seen the commercials. Women that eat lots of soup look like they are about 34, have perfectly groomed eyebrows and can shop for swim suits on line because everything looks good on them.
Christmas is over. It's time to put away cup cakes and frivolous attempts at holding onto pairs of earrings, and to embrace the simple truth that I am a woman that needs simplicity in all things.
And two infinity scarfs in two shades of blue seems to be a really nice way to start.
I will survive this winter in New England, in shades of blue and green and gold. It's nice to know that the people I love knew I needed a little help to stay warm this year.
December 5, 2014
At this moment in time, I know where my car keys are, my eyeglasses, (They'd been missing for a month, and last night I had a dream that revealed their location. Really.) both of our tv remotes, the cats, Sophie the Sweetest of Pups, my gym bag, the favorite cup, the house phone, the mobile, scissors, pens- I can even tell you where to find a band aid.
On the other hand, I misplaced the tablet, our dryer is busted so there are clothes draped on every available surface and our towels are crunchy, Christmas is coming. I need to make an appointment to get my teeth cleaned, and I'm having a hard time adjusting to the whole new full time job thing.
I have a new job! A job I love at Quincy College, 2 minutes away from our house, with a terrific boss and a really cool team that is kind and doesn't mind that sometimes most of my sentences end in exclamation points. And Christmas is coming!
But I haven't had as much time to go to the gym as I like, and I miss my friends and long dog walks with the Wondrous One.
I know where most of my stuff is, there is a gym in the basement of the building I work, my friends are on Facebook, and I know where my children are. I know they will be coming home to me tonight, safe. And that we live in a tiny corner of the world where the odds are everyone is coming home tonight.
I am fortunate woman.
I am also a sad woman. A woman whose heart has broken more than a little in these past few weeks for all of the mothers and sons out there who aren't so fortunate.
There is space inside me for both.
About a Week Before Christmas
December 18, 2013
The snow started about 2 pm today. By three I was on the phone with my boss checking to see if the Christmas party had been cancelled. It wasn't. By four, I was trying to talk Sophie, the Dog that Would Really Like to Live In Miami, into going outside. By 5, both kids were with friends and I decided to have peanuts for dinner in honor of the party I was missing.
And at 7:30, under a snowy sky, I was standing on top of a very small hill wishing that I had mittens. Night sledding. The kids came home, and when they tripped over the snowboards left piled up by the back door, a brilliant idea was born. Night sledding.
I've never taken a ride on virgin snow. It's puffy, not very slick, it kind of felt like the sled had had a little to much eggnog on the ride down.
We had only four of them, and there were five of us, so there was a certain amount of negotiation. Between the kids. I didn't have to negotiate. I drove the car, and, they assumed, would make the hot chocolate when we got home. That gives a woman a few privileges.
"Katy, do you want to make snow angels?" Tue had spilled from the sled onto her back and was inspired.
"No, I didn't come here to make snow angels," Katy said, then snatched the sled from Tue. "But you can make snow angels," she said sweetly.
"Mom, put your feed on the sled. Stop dragging them. There you go… Wasn't that fun? You want to ride down with me?" Colin offered right before smashing me in the face with a snowball.
He then pummeled Kate, who responded by falling over and mewling like a kitten. An angry, wet kitten.
We slid down, we staggered up. Enough times that I didn't even have to mention hot chocolate when I said it was time to head home.
In the car, in the quiet of heavy breath and windshields wiping "Ol Fifty Five" by Tom Waits came on the radio.
"As I pulled away slowly, feeling so holy, oh Lord, I was feeling alive."
Merry Christmas and to all A Good Night.
Christmas and Time Spent Next Door in the My Friends Kitchen
December 15, 2013
It's the middle of December. This is the time of year, more than any other, when money weighs heavy on my family. We can't afford to sign the kids up for ski lessons, we have eggs for dinner not because breakfast for dinner is a lovely novelty but because it's a cheap meal. I throw out the mountains of flyers in the Sunday paper because looking at all the wonderful gifts we can't afford is depressing. We aren't poor, for God sakes my kids do not suffer because they can't fly down a mountain on a few carefully crafted pieces of plexiglass. And we like eggs. But sometimes it feels that way. Our town is made up a lot of people who shop for sport and go to Aspen to snowboard.
The other morning, I woke up way too early. Too much on mind, not much I could do about it. The day was spent, and I'm kind so I'll make this brief, struggling thru a yoga class before the sun was even up, driving twenty miles to a mall to try to replace a broken phone even though, and I heard this five times in the course of my time there, I wasn't due for an upgrade. Next, I burned another twenty dollars of gas racing to work. I am employed at a local college where I also attend classes. A few emails, a brief review of what I needed to know for my finals next week, and then I raced back home to deal with dogs that needed walking, kids that needed feeding, and a mountain of half damp laundry in a dryer that hasn't worked that well for years.
It was a long day. By the time the dishes had been cleared, and my notes reviewed, and the dogs sent to the back yard for too little exercise but a chance to shriek at anyone with the good fortune to pass by, I was weary.(Yoga at 5:45 is a lovely idea in theory, but I should really only indulge if I have time to nap in the afternoon.) Our tree was standing in the corner. It smelled good, but none of the lights worked, so the rest was going to have to wait for a trip to Ocean State Job Lot on the weekend.
I went next door to say hello to our neighbors. I walk their dog. They look after my daughter when I'm working late. In a month or two, or if we are lucky, three, they are moving across town. I've known this for weeks. I didn't really know it until last night.
This is a family that is very different from our own. They are from another country. The mom is young and beautiful, I think she used to model. She sells fine jewelry on ebay. I am older and attractive if I work at it really hard and the lighting is good, but I never photograph well. I don't wear earrings any more because I always loose one, and I'm not stylish enough to pull off asymmetrical jewelry.
Her daughters are a little bit older than my little girl. They have more than one pair of Uggs. They have impeccable manners and always call me Miss Julie. They take off their shoes when they come over and they like my popcorn. They laugh at my jokes but that might be because they are really polite. Watching them grow up has been one of my favorite things.
We are very, very different. Yet, in the course of being neighbors for ten years, I eat cereal out of a bowl that belongs to them. She sips coffee out of one of our mugs. She notices when I lose weight, I can tell when she hasn't slept well. I went over to their house the other night at eleven pm to borrow a belt from her husband because my son needed to wear one to school in the morning. He got out of bed, found the belt, and told me to keep it.
I don't know them that well, and I know them better than my friends. I know they like to sleep really late on the weekends, and that she loves her leopard slippers. Her daughters have danced around my living room and my son has cleaned their garage. I know them because they are in our lives and have been in our lives almost every day for a very long time. And even though I don't always understand what my next door neighbor says, and I know she sometimes thinks I talk too fast, we have chosen each other as family.
At end of my long, long, day, I chose to visit the family next door. It's the holiday season and I think they must miss their home, far, far away, and their family, on the other side of the world. After our brief visits, to talk about kids, to take their dog for a walk, to borrow a stick of butter, I always feel better just knowing they live right next door.
When I got home, I realized that all of the boxes in the kitchen weren't parcels from online shopping. That in a month or two or three, they will be gone. They will live on the other side of town. We will see each other in the drug store, or at the school for a Christmas concert. But how much can we say when we aren't standing in each others kitchen, at the end of the day, and really listening thru all of the barriers language leaves between people from different sides of the world?
All of the stuff that had weighed me down heavier than a thousand rocks fell away, and I started missing my family of friends while they got ready for bed next door. My son came down stairs and put my head on his shoulder, and promised me that we would always stay in touch with the Vo's.
The tree is decorated now. And Katy is outside playing in the snow with her very best friend in the whole world. And I will ask her mom tonight, when I visit her kitchen, if her daughter can sleep over again.
This may be their last Christmas as neighbors, but it won't be our last Christmas as friends. My son promised.
January 6th, or The Night the Christmas Tree Came Down
January 7, 2013
I am fifty years and have been actively involved in celebrating Christmas for about forty five years. And tonight, for the very first time in my life, I took down our Christmas tree.
I lifted the ornaments from the branches and wrapped the delicate ones up in a newspaper bought just for this task. I jammed the nonbreakable ones, the stuffed snowmen, the pine cones, the little watercolored masterpieces from nursery schools a few years back, in between the little balles of paper. I swept up pine needles.
I stood on my tip toes and lifted our angel from her perch. I nested her inside some of the "snow" that looks awfully similar to asbestos, and placed her on top. I swept up pine needles.
Next I began to deal with the lights. I was the one that wove them among the branches, it was only fitting I was the one that began to untangle the tangled web I wove… four different strands of lights. At one point, the length was so long and I was pulling so hard to free them in a long single strand, the Christmas tree fell back into the foyer. I finally dragged the entire tree, stand and all, and miles of lights out to the sidewalk. There I had room to work. And so I did. I'm sure the people walking and driving by were thinking of better ways I could have gone about the whole task. But no one made any suggestions. If you are one of those people, next time, I'm open to any and all advice. (There is so much in this world I know absolutely nothing about.)
Next was the storage of the lights. In the past, my husband has wrapped them around empty paper towel rolls he'd saved for this purpose.
I used one paper towel roll, after I unrolled, according to the wrapper, 250 feet of paper towels. I began at one end, slowly reeling in yards and yards of twinkling stars, using the steady gestures a fisherman uses when bringing in a good catch. I think. I don't fish. But I imagine it feels similar.
When I was done with the the first line, I searched for alternatives. The remaining lights are wrapped around one sippie cup, one bottle of almost empty toner, (Bonnie Bell, left over from a brief horrid period of adult acne, thank God I'm finally too old for that,) and one tube of sunblock, still full, but number 15. Nobody uses fifteen anymore, the ozone layer is going to disappear any minute and using fifteen would pretty much guarantee skin cancer the following week.
And then I swept up pine needles. I lifted up the rug,I think I saw some from last year, and swept them up too. I took down the Christmas cards, and the stockings, I untangled tinsel from shoes, I put the last scraps of wrapping in the recycling, and ate the last Hershey's kiss hidden under a log.
This was the first time I put Christmas away, into a box. Wrapped it up, onto a cylander. Buried it under fake snow. They say that we need to keep Christmas in our hearts all year long. It doesn't feel like Christmas tonight, it feels like the end of an era. An era when I didn't have to responsible for unplugging and angel and tucking her away for a year.
But change is good. I'm going to go sweep up some more pine needles. I hope it still smells like Christmas for a day or two. Those candles that claim to smell like trees just smell like the home of someone that smokes that thinks they are keeping it a secret.
But that's another story.
Happy January 6th, my friends.
P.s. And if you haven't taken your tree down yet, start saving your paper towel rolls.
Christmas night Thoughts or Some time without kids so I might as well write something
December 26, 2012
What can I say about Christmas that hasn't already been said? Silent Night is a lovely song, batteries are a big part of a successful Christmas morning and chocolate kisses are probably not the healthiest way to start the day.
We had dinner at my sister and brother in laws home. Nancy and Jeff don't see the Colin and Katy that often. This past year my children entered the phase of their lives when their calendars require a full time assistant/chauffeur to keep track of their commitments and get them there. There is not much time is left for the simple joy of watching scary movies with relatives. So tonight after dinner, I left them there. Nancy and Jeff let them have snacks on the bed. Nancy and Jeff let them watch movies where Freddy Krueger is the hero. Nancy will paint Katy's toenails and Jeff will spend a half an hour talking about the Celtics with Colin. Make that an hour.
So here I am, home alone on Christmas night. I remember when I used to drop them at the sitters when they were little; car seat, diaper, dry cheerios were a delicacy little. I'd pull away from them like I was leaving a particularly horrible job. I'd turn up the radio, call all of my friends to announce I had a window of freedom and meet whoever picked up first for many cocktails and long lubricated conversations about how I loved my babies so much but I really, really needed this time to be me. They would chime in with answers like "you deserve this" and order me another drink another shot, while patting me on that hand and looking at me with pity. Maybe it was the spit up on my blouse, or the dark circles under my eyes. We'd spend a couple hours in the bar, or at someone's condo or in an intimate little restaurant. Drinking. Bemoaning a life that required me to wipe someone's bottom at least five times a day. Talking about the need for adult conversation. We talked a lot about how I needed adult conversation, but I don't recall any of the adult conversation after it's need was established. Repeatedly. Maybe that's because of all of the cocktails consumed during these conversations. I know that one of my favorite obsessions then, and I'm sure I shared it with anyone and everyone who would listen, was- how was I going to wean Katy from the breast. (That was how I put it, I swear, the breast, like it wasn't attached to my body, which if it wasn't attached to my body, it wouldn't have been such a big concern.) I don't really think this qualifies as adult conversation, I'm sure it bored my friends to tears, but for about a year and a half that was pretty much all that was on my sleep deprived little mind.
That was years ago. Tonight when I drove away from them I didn't even think of calling a friend to meet for a cocktail. It's Christmas night, the bars are closed. And not having the kids isn't thrilling me the way it used to. I didn't get that glorious rush of "I'm free" when I pulled out of the driveway. I just thought about how much I hate the months when it's dark at five o'clock.
I'm home now. There is a lot of post Christmas cleanup to do. I will turn on the radio and sweep and break down boxes for recycling. I'll try to figure out why the dishwasher won't drain. I'll peel up the goo from the kitchen floor from one of Katy's science experiments. I'll throw out the box of fancy chocolates; the kids sampled all of them and ate two. I will feed Colin's fish and try to find the receipt to $18 Nike Elite socks I went to the mall on Christmas Eve to get; they don't fit. $18 dollar socks that require two trips to the mall, I'm going to reminding him of that for the next six months every time I want him to clean his room.
I miss them. Not because they would help, and they would. I miss them because they have grown into the people I most want to hang out with. I want to commiserate with Colin and Katy about the measly snow we got, and talk about what the best part of the Christmas pageant was. I want to dance around the kitchen with Katy while the radio plays one of our songs, (most of the songs on the radio are one of our songs.) I want Colin to show my something on youtube I just have to see, which I invariable find totally disgusting or pee in my pants hysterical*.
And now my thoughts turn to all of the mothers tonight without their kids. I'm picking mine up at nine.
All I can say to them is I promise to try to remember each day and each night, I am the luckiest woman in the world.
*I am aware that if Colin reads this he will never, ever show me a youtube video again, and decided I can live with that.
I Still Have Hives or Merry Christmas
December 20, 2012
I still have hives.
Maybe you don't even know that I have hives, so let me explain; a little more than a week ago little strawberry bumps sprouted all over my body. From my ankles to my collar bone, welts were scattered across my skin like clouds, except really ugly, menacing, hot pink clouds. That itched. And still itch. A lot.
These are the days before Christmas. I need to shop, make lists, cook something and cover it colored sugar, I need to figure out what to do for my children's teachers, (money to the room mother), our choir director, (gift card) and my supervisor at the work study job at the college I'm currently attending, (a really nice card and something in the muffin family.)
And all I want to do is find this mysterious itch that has been plaguing me for a week and scratch it. All I want to know is how much longer until my next dose of Benedryl.
I will get everything done. Every year there is something getting in the way of all that needs doing, and it always gets done. This year, all it is is a fervent desire to scratch. And I still have one more trip to the doctor's, two refills for my medication and a couple of really good friends who will help if I need it.
Colin and Katy are in the Christmas pageant this year. On Christmas Eve, Katy will make her debut as a Wise One. Colin grudgingly agreed to take on the challenging role of Donkey. So I've got a minor skin disease. At least I don't have to try to sleep on dried out straw. In a barn. With farm animals and all of the bugs that like to hang out with farm animals.
That must have been really uncomfortable.
I Can't Sleep and I'm Not Sure I Ever Will Again
December 16, 2012
This past week was the last week of the semester at school. Classes ran long, finals loom. By Monday, I need to know where all the bones go, how to use a blood pressure cuff and be able to list the physiological benefits of weight training.
Wednesday brought us to the frantic search for a tree stand and a tree we could afford to put inside it. For the first time tonight, I strung the lights all by myself. It's a beautiful tree. On it's branches hang ornaments my children labored over every year since kindergarten. They are mixed up with with crystal sleighs, and blown glass icicles I bought before I found myself inside a life with kids and animals.
There were conversations with my kids about what happened in Connecticut.
In the middle of it all- the amazing, the time consuming and the tragic; on Tuesday afternoon hives sprouted on my body. Red welts along my back, inside my arms, on my ankles.
I went to the doctor on Tuesday, she told me I was having an allergic reaction. She gave me steroids, and suggested benedryl and oatmeal baths.
I still have the bumps. But now the drugs I'm on to get rid of them are keeping me awake.
I've got time now to study, sweep up pine needles, catch up on Thirty Rock.
I want to sleep. I need to go to church tomorrow. I need to study the endocrine system tomorrow. I need to stop by my friend's house and decorate gingerbread men with my daughter tomorrow.
Instead my body is telling me to write a novel while I scratch the back of my left knee.
My brain needs some undivided attention.
And my heart, it beats. It carries me along. It sends me up the stairs to watch my kids asleep.
So I'm a little itchy and awake.
Tomorrow when I'm spent and sleepy, someone will tuck me in while another wipes me down with Benadryl. The people that I love will carry me.


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Womens Nutrients- Douglas Labs (180 Capsules)
Regular price
Product Information
Women's Nutrients is designed for women over 40. It is a complete hypo-allergenic, nutrient rich, highly bioavailable multi-vitamin, multi-mineral and trace element supplement. The formula combines superior mineral cofactors, activated vitamins and antioxidants to support optimal health. These nutrients are blended with calcium-d-glucarate, lignans and herbals extracts to offer additional support for occasional stress, macular integrity, cardiovascular function and breast cell health.
Vitamin/Mineral Distinctions:
High potency, hypo-allergenic, vegetarian formula
Activated vitamins and superior mineral chelates for optimal absorption
800 mcg Metafolin® (6S)-5-methyltetrahydrofolic acid (L-5-MTHF), the naturally occurring universally metabolized form of folate
Antioxidant support from naturally derived vitamin C, vitamin E, beta carotene, lycopene, lutein, zeaxanthin and alpha lipoic acid
400 mg calcium citrate (highest of all our multivitamins), 1,000 i.u. vitamin D3, and 100 mcg vitamin K1 for healthy bones
2 mg biotin for healthy hair, skin and nails
6 capsules contain:
Ascorbic acid 250mg (417%DV)
Vitamin C (ascorbyl palmitate) 120mg (85%DV)
Calcium (citrate) 400mg (40%DV)
Vitamin D3 1,000 IU (250%DV)
D-alpha tocopherol succinate (Vitamin E) 100 IU (333%DV)
Vitamin K1 100mcg (125%DV)
Thiamine HCl (B1) 25mg (1,667%DV)
Riboflavin (B2) 25mg (1,471%DV)
Riboflavin 5 phosphate (activated B2) 12.5mg (735%DV)
Niacin 25mg (125%DV)
Niacinamide 50mg (250%DV)
Pyridoxine HCl (B6) 12.5mg (625%DV)
Pyridoxal 5 phosphate (activated B6) 12.5mg (625%DV)
Folate (Metafolin®, L-5-MTHF) 800mcg (200%DV)
Methylcobalamin (B12) 500mcg (8,333%DV)
Biotin 2mg (667%DV)
Pantothenic acid (calcium pantothenate) (B5) 50mg (500%DV)
Iodine (potassium iodide) 200mcg (133%DV)
Magnesium (citrate) 100mg (25%DV)
Zinc (citrate) 15mg (100%DV)
Selenium (selenomethionine) 200mcg (286%DV)
Manganese (citrate) 2mg (100%DV)
Chromium (polynicotinate) 200mcg (167%DV)
Potassium (citrate) 100mg (3%DV)
Boron (glycinate) 2mg
Vanadium (as bis-glycinato oxo vanadium) 100mcg
Choline (bitartrate) 100mg
Inositol 125mg
Alpha lipoic acid 75mg
Mixed carotenoids 7,500 IU
Beta carotene 4500mcg
Lycopene 125mcg
Lutein** 250mcg
Zeaxanthin* 50mcg
Cranberry juice extract 100mg
MacularSynergy Complex:
Lutein** 6mg
Zeaxanthin* 1mg
BreastHealth Plus:
HMR lignan ***10mg ---(containing 7-hydroxymatairesinol) (Norway spruce)
Green tea (camellia sinensis) leaf 100mg ---(standardized to contain 65% total tea catechins and 23% epigallocatechin gallate (EGCG))
Turmeric (curcuma longa) extract (root)**** 100mg ---(standardized to contain 95% curcuminoids)
Calcium-D-Glucarate 50mg
CardioPhenol Complete:
Red wine (vitis vinifera) concentrate (whole grape) 100mg ---(standardized to contain 25% total polyphenols)
Grape (vitis vinifera) extract (seed) 100mg ---(standardized to contain 92% polyphenols)
Pomegranate (punica granatum) extract (whole fruit) 50mg ---(standardized to contain 40% punicosides)
StressCalm Blend:
Rhodiola rosea extract (root) 100mg ---(standardized to contain 3% total rosavins and min. 1% salidroside)
Lemon balm (melissa officinalis) extract (leaf) 50mg ---(standardized to contain 5% rosemarinic acid)
Other Ingredients: vegetable capsule.
Contains NO: dairy, wheat, yeast, gluten, sugar, soy, preservatives, hydrogenated oils, hidden coatings, excipients, binders, fillers, shellacs, artificial colors or fragrance.
Recommended Use: Adults: As a dietary supplement, take 4 to 6 capsules daily, in divided doses, with meals.
Warnings and Contraindications: If pregnant or lactating, consult your physician before taking this product. Turmeric is not recommended for individuals with bile duct obstruction. Consult your physician for more information. Grape seed extract, cranberry, curcumin and green tea may be contra-indicated with blood thinning medications.
*For more information, please see the manufacturer's website

subset: commoncrawl


text:
SAN FRANCISCO (MarketWatch) -- Ciena Corp. CIEN, +20.36% shares were down 3.1% at $2.49 in late morning trade Friday after the networking company said it has named Arthur Smith, formerly senior vice president of global operations, as chief operating officer. Linthicum, Md.-based Ciena also said it has consolidated research and development under Chief Technology Officer Steve Alexander as senior vice president, products and technology.
Ciena shares down following management shuffle
Quote References
+7.21 +20.36%


text:
As a highly significant biblical text, how would you, as a teacher, have interaction college students with the story of the Good Samaritan from Luke 10:25-37? Moreover, the opposite rationale for cross-border education highlighted by the OECD relates to skilled migration. I also serve as a Study Abroad Research Consultant for the Center for Global Education at California State University at Dominguez Hills. A curriculum with a multicultural education base would seem more apt to successfully cater to the multi layered nature of the group.
This suggests the need then for a multicultural strategy to instructing all subjects, to facilitate the development of crucial and analytical pondering in college students, which itself are aims of schooling within the Caribbean. In conclusion, here are six methods for incorporating a multicultural curriculum in a choice-based art class.
Labaree on Multicultural Education Labaree's Democratic Equality ideology, which is outlined in Labaree's article, Public Goods, Private Goods: The American Struggle Over Educational Goals is an ideal example of various aspects of Multicultural Education. Hitherto.. the structural decentralisation of the education system in England and Wales has permitted a degree of autonomy at the native degree. Multicultural theories assert that the values, personal histories, attitudes, and beliefs of researchers can't be separated from the knowledge they create.
Is there anyone who can elaborate the pressure that had lead to the beginning of multicultural training. Gollnick has also authored quite a few textbooks reminiscent of, Introduction to the Foundations of American Education, The Joy of Teaching: An Introduction to the Profession, and Multicultural Education in a Pluralistic Society. In our multicultural training class, we've talked rather a lot about making the students really feel welcome and accepted in our classrooms. The standards required all NCATE member institutions (about 80{469fbd2a1ee88191e096179cc3b18dcd2f090ab0264e51958993cd96293477f9} of the instructor education programs within the United States) to implement elements, courses, and packages in multicultural schooling.
Despite the racial conflicts that arose in response to the soaring immigration after 1945, one might notice that British society finally evolved, for better or worse. Self-injury is one other example of a conduct that's typically exhibited by people with disconnection points. Multicultural education can due to this fact be seen as related to a fantastic extent to the curriculum, taking this view of training.


text:
- Telephone:
- 01962 870707 | 07970 693008
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Toyota Aygo Vvt-I Sport 1.0 3dr
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Grey, Finance available, Part exchange, HPI checked, Exceptional value only, £1,250
Representative example
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Gabriella Safdieh
Doctor • New York
Gabriella Safdieh, MS, MD is a pediatrician and rheumatologist. Gabriella completed medical school at the University of Pennsylvania, trained in Pediatrics at New York University, and completed a fellowship in Pediatric Rheumatology at the Hospital for Special Surgery in New York City / Weill Cornell Medical center. When she is not helping her patients, Gabriella is spending time with her husband and three children, enjoying nature and the beach, practicing Pilates and yoga, while loving and living life to its fullest.
About Dr. Safdieh
Gabriella Safdieh, MS, MD is a pediatrician and rheumatologist. Gabriella completed medical school at the University of Pennsylvania, trained in Pediatrics at New York University, and completed a fellowship in Pediatric Rheumatology at the Hospital for Special Surgery in New York City / Weill Cornell Medical center. She has also started her training with the Institute for Functional Medicine which teaches healthcare professionals to get to the root cause of lifestyle-driven disease through a patient-centered, systems biology approach. She has completed the Applying Functional Medicine in Clinical Practice course, which teaches clinicians to more effectively integrate science, research, and clinical insights to treat and prevent disease and maintain health. In addition, she studied with Dr. AnnaLisa Pastore who incorporates the principles of Energetic Nutritional Assessment Technique and Natural Force Healing in her practice.
Gabriella is passionate about helping her patients address the root cause of their disease and to help them reach their health goals in the most natural way possible. She wants to help children and young adults maintain wellness and best treat the root causes of their chronic diseases. With a background in Rheumatology and the frequent autoimmune disease burdening our society, she has a unique expertise to help manage these complex conditions, blending together Eastern and Western medicine in her practice. When she is not helping her patients, Gabriella is spending time with her husband and three children, enjoying nature and the beach, practicing Pilates and yoga, while loving and living life to its fullest.
Interests: Pediatrics, teenagers and young adults, digestive health, autoimmune disease, systemic lupus erythematosus, juvenile rheumatoid arthritis, spondyloarthropathy, skin health, asthma and cough, thyroid and adrenal health, weight management, sleep disturbances, stress and anxiety.
Frequently asked questions
Can Parsley Health be my primary care physician?
We are considered a primary care practice, so we treat all conditions that a primary care doctor would. We are not specialists. However, if you need to see an OBGYN, cardiologist, or surgeon, for example, you will be referred appropriately. The costs associated with the services provided by specialists or any other healthcare provider outside of Parsley Health are not covered by your Parsley Health membership. Beyond visits, the primary mode of communication with our care team is messaging. We answer quickly during the week (within 24 - 48 hours) and always have a doctor on call to address urgent issues on weekends and holidays. We are often able to take care of acute issues without the need for a visit. A few points to remember about your Parsley Health membership: 1. We do not take insurance. However, we can provide paperwork for you to submit for out-of-network reimbursement from your insurance. You can also pay for your membership using FSA/HSA dollars. 2. We are not available for same-day emergency appointments. 3. If you have a medical emergency, we recommend that you visit urgent care or an ER.
Is Parsley Health covered by insurance?
We do not accept any form of insurance. Parsley Health is classified as a primary care practice, but insurance companies don't recognize our membership model. After each medical visit, a lab manager can provide a superbill that you can submit to insurance for out-of-network reimbursement. Many members choose to pay for their plans using FSA/HSA dollars.
What is included with my plan?
What's Included: Doctor's visit(s) Health coaching visit(s) Online billing and scheduling Unlimited messaging with your care team through an online patient portal (Parsley Membership only) Prescriptions for medications and supplements (Parsley Membership only) In addition to our services, you'll have access to: Our online supplement store at a discounted price Members-only events Exclusive access to and deals from our wellness partners - our favorite places to sweat, stretch, zen, and shop!
Do I need health insurance if I have a Parsley Health membership?
A Parsley Health membership does not replace health insurance. We advise all members to maintain a separate health insurance plan of their choosing. For blood work, insurance frequently offers full coverage. Please also note that the Affordable Care Act (Obamacare) includes a requirement that all U.S. citizens purchase health insurance. A Parsley Health membership does not meet this requirement.
Is testing included in my membership fee? What costs can I expect to see?
Your doctor will work with you to customize testing orders based on your health needs and personal preferences. Costs for blood work and specialty tests are not included in the membership price. Blood work is usually covered by insurance. Specialty tests range in cost from $100 - $350. These tests, however, are completely optional.
What types of diagnostic testing does Parsley Health perform?
We offer both standard blood work and in-depth specialty testing to help construct a comprehensive picture of your health and better inform treatment. A personalized testing plan will be recommended by your doctor. All tests, however, are optional. Some of our most frequently prescribed specialty tests assess allergies, cortisol, genetics, microbiome health, and toxic metal levels.


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For The People (Live Mix)
Posted: Wed Aug 02, 2017 2:26 pm
The third episode of the sequel to "Psycho Bitch" - "Live in Thailand" is out with the title "For The People". Brand new remixes and re-edits of previously released tracks all brought to you exclusively in this mix and put together NOT for the mainstream music industry but.. FOR THE PEOPLE!
Available for FREE download: Open Source | Ghost Label records


text:
European nations will face heavy pressure to impose tougher sanctions on Russia as foreign ministers meet in Brussels on Tuesday to discuss the attack on the Malaysian jetliner last week.
A UK-led group of hardliners is insisting that the downing of MH17, blamed on Russian-backed rebels in eastern Ukraine, has changed the calculus for the European Union's relationship with Moscow, Financial Times reported.
On Monday night, the UN Security Council unanimously approved a resolution calling for unrestricted access for investigators to the crash site. It called for an international probe into the MH17 attack and an end to all military activity around the site.
The resolution spelt out the world's demand for an end to the "inexcusable" treatment of the victims by insurgents controlling the area whose behavior had been "sickening and appalling beyond belief", said Mark Lyall Grant, the UK's ambassador to the UN.
British Prime Minister David Cameron told his parliament on Monday that "it is time to make our power, influence and resources felt … Russia cannot expect to continue enjoying access to European markets, European capital, European knowledge and technical expertise while she fuels conflict in one of Europe's neighbors."
The ministers meeting in Brussels on Tuesday cannot approve "phase three" sanctions – a move targeting entire sectors of the Russian economy that must first be backed by EU heads of government. But the UK-led group, including central and eastern European countries, wants to lay the groundwork for such an escalation, the report said.
Some countries, including France, are however resisting a tougher approach, and there are concerns the debate could split the EU.
– Contact us at [email protected]


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why God forgives you...
Reader comment on item: Pope Benedict XVI and the Koran
Submitted by Naomi (Netherlands), Aug 23, 2006 at 07:01
God forgives you your sins, because Jesus died for you. actually Jesus is the Son of God, but also, they're both one, together with the Holy Spirit. and he forgives you, but you have to ask for it, every time. and if you really mean it, He will forgive you.
this is what i believe, and i know it's the truth. please make a choice yourself,
God bless you,
Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".
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Blair Witch
Right but not very bright, perhaps it is the best summary that can be made of Blair Witch, a film directed by the promising Adam Wingard that Time Trap had already delighted us with other previous projects like You are the next or The Guest and that does not finish enthusing with this sequel-tribute.
James, Heather's brother, has grown obsessed with the idea that his sister may have survived in the Black Hills of Maryland despite her intensive tracking. His new documentary project will be to follow the trail of a video uploaded to YouTube in which the face of what appears to be a woman in a reflection appears. With the intention of getting to the bottom of the matter, James and his group of friends are equipped with all kinds of cameras to enter the forest with the authors of the mysterious video, a couple of locals, as guides. There goes the trailer:
Wingard chooses to make a film very close to the original, The Blair Witch Project, as far as the form is concerned. Conceived in the same way, it has the same problems (very blurry images, much of the footage in which absolutely nothing happens, A Dog's Purpose repetitive shots, easy scares …) but lacks its main attraction: the viral marketing that gave wings to the first.
The formula of the success of this found footage of 1999 was that you could play with the idea that it really started from found footage; 17 years Ghost in the Shell later the spectators are more than chastened and lack that innocence so there seems to be no way out other than the homage. Here you have the best films that use the narrative format of the found footage:
Views: 362
Genre: Thriller
Director: Adam Wingard
Actors: Brandon Scott, Callie Hernandez, Corbin Reid, James Allen McCune, Valorie Curry, Wes Robinson
Duration: 89 min
Release: 2016
IMDb: 5.0


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15 Aug 2019
Coolest 15 Glass Goblets 2019
Bubble Glass Goblet in Clear – Set of 6 #ad - ). Capacity 10 oz. H (5. 12 in. No assembly required. Each piece is unique. X 8 in. 5 lbs. Hand blown barware. Dia. Set of 6. Handmade.
Circleware Piemonte Red White Wine Glasses, Set of 4, 10.25 Ounce, Limited Edition Glassware Drinkware Barware Whiskey Scotch Drinking Glasses Goblet "Diony" #ad - Great for any event, durable for daily use 100% lead free. By circle ware manufacture of glassware, glass milk bottles, drinking chalkboard boots shot glasses, moscow mule copper mugs, mason jars, double water beverage drink dispenser with spigot infuser etc. Guarantee you have nothing to risk so indulge yourself we backed it by our no hassle, no questions asked guarantee. Recommended uses these are perfect party decorations depending on the theme you will find use for them christmas, birthday gifts, wedding party, your best selling beverage, valentine's day. Strong sturdy high quality and stylish.
Silver Buffalo SQ11166EG Warner Bros Suicide Squad Harley Quinn Daddy's Little Monster Glass Goblet, 40 oz, Multicolor #ad - Not safe for microwave or dishwasher hand wash only. We pride ourselves on manufacturing and distributing product that resonates with the child or fan(atic) in all of us. The silver buffalo sq11166eg suicide squad harley quinn daddy's little monster glass goblet lets you enjoy up to 40-ounces of your favorite drink in style don't drink from simple glassware when you can enjoy your beverage from glassware decorated with your favorites. Express your love for harley quinn with this goblet silver buffalo is a trendsetting housewares and home decor company based in the heart of new york city. This item makes a great gift for fans who will love the awesome design as well as the superb quality. We work in collaboration with your favorite licenses and brands to develop creative, unique and innovative products while maintaining a commitment to detail and quality.
Delirium Tremens Belgian Chalice/Goblet Beer Glass 0.25L – Set of 4 #ad - Upper rim 25″. Set of 4. Capacity 025l/85oz. Laser elephant etching on the inside for bubbles and aroma. Height 55″.
Libbey Premiere Cobalt Blue 16.25-Oz Goblet Glass, Set of 12 #ad - Dishwasher safe and made in the us. These vibrant cobalt blue 16-ounce goblets will enhance the look of any table. The elegant one-piece pulled stem and beautiful color is perfect for everyday dining or formal affairs.
Holiday Christmas Holly Berry Clear Glass Goblet Set (Case of 4) #ad - In need of an affordable, elegant set of holiday dinnerware start with these lovely clear glass goblets adorned with festive holly leaves and berries each goblet is sturdy enough for holiday meals at home or as the perfect gift for friends and family. Case of 4 holly berry clear glass goblets.
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WINE BODIES GS105 Italian Wine Glass Goblets Band, Gold #ad - Each glass measures 55″ inches tall by 280″ inches rim diameter. Wash with mild soap & water for long lasting quality. Made in italy. Max capacity 10 oz (each glass). Set contains six (6) classic goblet glasses.
Russian Cut Crystal Red White Wine Glasses Goblets, Stemmed Vintage Design Glassware, 8.5 Oz. Hand Made #ad - Hand made cut crystal wine glasses 85oz/250ml on a stem. 65″h x 2 7/8″w. 250g/85oz. Set of 6 glasses for wine.
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We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.


text:
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
Graduate School vs. Law School
I have started school.
There are three material things that I see as being different
from grad school than law school.
In law school, I had to read material that was abstract
and philosophical, and rarely dealt with race, class or gender.
Now I get to read material that is abstract, philosophical,
and that deals with race, class and gender.
I wake up reading. I go to sleep reading. In law school, it took me
a year to engage with the material this way. This is a problem,
seeing that your first year grades in law school play a huge
role in your employment options after you graduate.
The second thing is that I have started school with the
understanding that it is my job to build community. To that
extent I have met with folks, to get institutional history so
that I can understand the lay of the land, who to stay away
from, who I must be in contact with, where the axis of power lies, etc.
The third material difference is being around men and women
who do not automatically presume that others are heterosexual.
I was kind of taken by surprise when talking to a colleague, who was
giving me the lowdown on a professor whom she suspects is homophobic
who said, "I don't know if you are LGBTQ identified but, this professor..."
I thought to myself, wow, that was cool and really progressive of her
to not only think but to say that.
I read all the time. In fact, had I not taken a train to see Birkhold
I never would have realized that I needed to (re)learn how to read
anywhere at anytime.
Last week, I had been telling myself, if I sit down to read, I need at least two
or three hours. FAGET THAT! Give me 1 hour and I am knocking out
at least one twenty page article with reading notes. ALL TIME IS VALUABLE.
Right now, I have estimated that I have 22 hours a week of reading.
Yup. 22. No joke, eh.
The school work isn't the hardest part of this. It's hard
but it's manageable. So long as you eat, sleep, don't party and
not have some tragic 'ish happen in an intimate relationship.
Oh, and a willingness to sit down and engage with the material. No
internet. No phone. No tv. Just you and the paper.
The most challenging part is engaging with humans, managing relationships,
keeping track of deadlines and simply just showing up on time.
Have you started school?
How is it going?
Any questions for me?
Posted by M.Dot. at 8:35 PM
Labels: Graduate School
14 comments:
- Jeremy R. Levine said...
"Now I get to read material that is abstract, philosophical, and that deals with race, class and gender." Aint that the truth.
- This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
- Nexgrl said...
I understand what you're going through. While in graduate school, I went to school, to work,to the library, and home. When discussing where I went to graduate school, people are amazed that I lived in Atlanta and never went to a club or traveled anywhere along the east coast. I then go on to explain that it was about obtaining a degree, that's it, that's all.
- neo said...
I'm just glad this phase is over. Working on my thesis involves me going from work to lab continuously throughout the week and then work on actual material throughout weekends.
- Sara said...
I just found this blog this morning, but I like it! As a fellow first-year grad student in history, I'm amazed you even have time to blog at all. Keep it up! :)
- Janine said...
I'm a recent grad who has no intention of becoming a practicing attorney but am considering applying to law school. I'd love to hear what you have to say about the pros and cons of L-school and why you decided to opt out.
- Model Minority said...
Hi Janine,
Thank for stopping by. I am here to help.
Here are some questions I have for all folks considering L school.
1. Why do you want to go?
2. Have you chosen schools that have demonstrated that they can graduate students like you?
3.If you are not going to a state school, and your you or your family isn't paying for it directly, have you thought about the debt burden to income ratio?
Send me the answers, via email, along w/ any questions that you may have.
- DrPrettySmileDDS said...
I am in a graduate biomedical science program and it is NO JOKE..lol... I am taking gross anatomy and it is taking up all my time...but its going to be worse in dental school, so I better get used to it. I would love to get a Masters in African-American Literature later on in life. Have a great school year! I love your blog, by the way :) Are you still starting the online book club?
- Model Minority said...
Hello DPS,
Thank you for your kind words.
I get traffic from your facebook page all the time.
Now I know who you are, sorta.**raises hand to chin.
Uhhm. The Book Club. I doubt it. I can barely blog and given the 22 hours of reading lols. BUT. Its all good. I like the material.
Gross Anatomy? Sounds fancy.
When the blog relaunches I will have a book section, perhaps that is where we can have a book club.
I also have an outline for a book site, where will I find the time tho?
- arieswym said...
What are you studying in grad school? From this website and twitter, I enjoy and learn from the book and article recommendations that you share.
I was also wondering how connected are your undergraduate and graduate studies and how have you used your undergrad studies to assist/shape (or not) your graduate studies.
- M.Dot. said...
Thank you for asking.
I am pursuing a Ph.D in Women Studies.
I am looking at women and work, teens and sexuality and building
local sustainable communities.
I am glad you like the links. I try and make sure to include them, because I think it makes for a better read. I will be teaching next year, God willing, so I hope to use the blog posts as a part of my curriculum.
I went to Eugene Lang for Undergrad.
In retrospect, they are connected in that both are interdisciplinary.
Lang is a place that let me be myself.
A mentor of mine is a Dean @ NYU and I remember her saying that I need to find a place where I could bring as much of myself as possible.
I didn't realize it at the time, but Lang really allowed me to do that. I was privileged in being able to have such a student centered education in New York City. Thats really unheard of. Ironically me and a classmate spent time WISHING we went to NYU/Barnard. In reality, I KNOW for certain that I was where I needed to be.
Are you considering school?
If so what?
- arieswym said...
Wow...a student centered education in undergrad, completely different from my undergrad experience as an engineering student at Rutgers. I fought to include more of myself in my studies and in the development of my curriculum as I went through undergrad but it was a struggle.
I am in the process of applying for masters programs in international relations, which is what my interests have evolved toward.
- Model Minority said...
Hey Love,
Rutgers is awesome. A HBCU in the North East on the Low. I wish I applied their for history, but I never really gained any traction in dialoging with the department when I was in research mode, so I didn't put it on the list.
Their L School graduates more Negros than many official, HBCU's, which awesome.
Why international relations?
What are the questions that you are seeking to explore as a student?
How have your interests evolve?. With an engineers mind we could totally use you to do many things. Big {TEEF} Smile.
- Robert said...
My first time readn this blog. Not sure if this is just one person or several. But at any rate, I enjoyed your thoughts a lot. Especially this post, it reminded me to be mindful of my studies and to livicated to my art.Right on.
-Robert Trujillo (from Oakland as well)


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Engelsk verb: go across
|go across (om bevegelse) go across or through
|Eksempler med tilsvarende betydning
|We passed the point where the police car had parked.
A terrible thought went through his mind.
|Ord med samme betydning (synonymer)
|go through, pass
|Something is ----ing PP.
Somebody ----s PP
|Mindre spesifikke uttrykk
|go, locomote, move, travel
|Mere spesifikke uttrykk
|blunder, break through, cover, crack, crash, cross, cut, cut across, cut through, cycle, fumble, get across, get over, infiltrate, lock, make, move through, muscle, negociate, negotiate, overstep, pass across, pass over, pass over, pass through, pass through, run, squeak by, squeak through, track, transgress, transit, transit, traverse, trespass, work


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Are you searching for Apental Calc Pro app APK file for your Android phone or tablet? If your response is yes, then you have landed at right site and platform. From this post, you can download Apental Calc Pro – Best Facebook Auto Liker Android app for free of cost.
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Vilnius International Airport (VNO /EYVI )General information and contact details of Vilnius International Airport in Vilnius , Lithuania
Vilnius International Airport
Vilnius International Airport is major airport located in Vilnius, Lithuania and serves domestic and international flights to 83 different destinations, connecting Vilnius with Europe, Asia and Africa. The most popular destinations to fly to from Airport are Flughafen Kopenhagen-Kastrup, Frankfurt am Main, Vienna, Helsinki and Riga . The longest flight you can take is to Ben Gurion (4:10 hours) .
Carriers such as Wizz Air, Ryanair and Air Baltic have regular flights to and from Airport.
Here you can find all the information about Airport location, arrivals and departures and learn important details about weather forecasts and current conditions. You may also read more about Airport in the Wiki tab and find other interesting pictures of it in the Photos section.
Are you looking for the spotting in Vilnius International Airport? You have chance to catch such impressive planes in Vilnius like Fokker 100, Sukhoi Superjet 100-95 or Fokker 70


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Live Demonstration Hour 2018
Written by Wayne MacPhail This year the ASTC Live Demonstration Hour was an early riser. So were the several hundred avid attendees who, despite the 9:00 a.m. start, gave venerable Master of Ceremonies Eddie Goldstein and his demonstrative crew a warm, Sunday-morning welcome at the Exhibit Hall Stage. Goldstein has been corralling... Read More


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It seemed as though the entire Sutton Place neighborhood had gathered at Morso on a recent Tuesday evening. The contemporary 95-seat restaurant, lined with vintage 1950s-style graphics, was packed with couples, groups of friends, families and a handful of solo diners.
They sat in the white-tablecloth dining room and at the hammered-copper bar; several relaxed on a patio that would soon be enclosed for the winter. Others milled about, socializing with regulars and staffers.
Steven Horn, 47, who lives a few blocks away, walked in and hugged the manager, Ezma Samuel. Ms. Samuel offered a profuse apology to Mr. Horn: "I hope you weren't too upset."
Mr. Horn had been in the day before, for the spaghetti-and-meatballs special, but the kitchen had run out of the dish. "It's O.K., Ezma," he replied with a smile. "You know I'll be back next Monday."
She walked him to the bar, and before he had even sat down, the bartender, Michael Marx, began making him a martini. Magically, a popover appeared, arriving with a ramekin of house-made ricotta, Mr. Horn's favorite way to start a meal here.
"The staff is thoughtful and takes care of me," Mr. Horn said. "Normally, I'm here with my boyfriend, and we always feel like we are at home, surrounded by family."
Restaurants in this upscale part of Manhattan are known for pricey menus that feed a deep-pocketed and perhaps a more distant clientele. Morso is different.
Since it opened five years ago, on East 59th Street between First Avenue and Sutton Place, the polished but unpretentious Italian restaurant has become part of the neighborhood's fabric.
When plans were announced last year for the construction of a new high-rise nearby, the owner and chef, Pino Luongo, made the dining room available to neighbors who wished to discuss their concerns. More than a year later, the sessions continue.
Some regulars say they see Morso almost as an extension of their homes. Especially Barbara Wrubel, who lives in the building above the restaurant. "There's something so wonderful and reliable about it," she said.
Ms. Wrubel had recently enjoyed a Ladies Night here with her friend Sheila. On Mondays, women-only tables receive a 50 percent discount on their food before 7:30 p.m.
Discounts aside, there is a superb Italian meal to be had.
After all, Mr. Luongo, 63, has drawn loyal crowds for more than two decades, dating to when he ran Le Madri in Chelsea and Coco Pazzo on the Upper East Side (both have since closed).
The food, however, seems to take a back seat to the extended community of people who dine and work here. Most of the staff members have worked at restaurants operated by Mr. Luongo for a decade or more. Ms. Samuel, eight years on, is the newcomer to the bunch.
Customers like Ms. Wrubel have followed Mr. Luongo here from Coco Pazzo. Others, like Mr. Horn, discovered him when Morso opened.
On the same Monday Ms. Wrubel visited, Mr. Horn returned for the spaghetti and meatballs he had previously missed out on, this time with his boyfriend, Trent Huffman.
The couple sat at the bar, each drinking a martini and nibbling on popovers. Mr. Huffman, 41, was saddened by the recent loss of a family member, but Morso seemed to lift his spirits.
"It hasn't been easy these past few weeks," Mr. Huffman said. "But in good times and in bad times, Morso is where I come."


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chiropractic, Dr. Nicholas Araza, Good Posture, Health, Innate Body Boot Camp, Innate Fitness, Santa Barbara Family Chiropractic, Wellness
It's true, most of your problems come from your bad habits. But hey, don't feel bad! A lot of them aren't your fault, you weren't given a users manual at birth, nor did anybody show you the best way to sleep, wash dishes, walk, sit, run, lift…etc and you've been doing your best. You may have even been getting away with some pretty awful form for quite some time with no problems.
But we all know that misusing a tool decreases its life expectancy and the same is true for your body, the most wonderful tool of all. So here's a little tip on how to get the most out of your body, so that it will last a lifetime and not break down on you years before it should.
For every other topic you can think of there is usually a best posture or position that will also offer the longest durability and least wear and tear on your body. To find out what they are please join our community education event this Thursday Feb 9th at 630 here at the Santa Barbara Health and Fitness Epicenter "Innate Fitness and SB Family Chiropractic" 360 S. Hope Ave Suite c100-105.
Move like you should for Health!
-Dr. Nick Araza DC CCWP Crossfit Trainer


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Located at the northern tip of the Grenadines and bordered by both the Caribbean sea and the Atlantic Ocean, lies an island reserved solely for the super-rich, and to be candid, the pretty damn famous. With residents such as Mick Jagger, Bryan Adams and the late David Bowie, one can only imagine the difficulty level of sneaking ashore to partake in some of the undoubted shenanigans these rock n' roll legends are engaging in, and on an island so exclusive to boot.
I know you're all wondering: rock legends, rich and famous people…where on earth am I talking about? It's the island of mustique, a small, privately owned intimate island, stretching no more than 1,400 acres. This would be part of a cluster of islands that make up St Vincent and the Grenadines in the West Indies, a region some of you might recognise from the film series Pirates of the Caribbean. The island of Mustique is owned by the Mustique company, which is in turn owned by its various home owners, hence the plethora of rock legends, billionaires and old money. Even visiting the island is an exclusive privilege. If you're interested in experiencing this celebrity-laden slice of paradise you need to receive the much coveted VIP invite.
There is, however, another way to rub shoulders with the likes of Mick Jagger and engage in your own Mustique adventure without an invitation—that is if you have deep enough pockets to rent one of the 104 villas on the island, or book a room in one of the island's two hotels—the famous cotton House, or the privately owned, seven-bedroom, boutique hotel, Firefly. As for me, having a particular love for Moroccan influences and awe-inspiring views, I opted to rent the magnificent Toucan Hill—the one property that literally towers above the rest nestled amongst the incredible flora at the highest point on Mustique Island. I rented this seven acre property owned by Tatiana Copeland, named partly for her initials, T.C., but more accurately for her motto in life: Two can, one can't.
This gorgeous white mansion looks part Greek, part Moroccan at first glance, and was first built by Joachim Construction Company, located in St. Vincent. However when the house was only halfway finished, Joachim retired and the construction was taken over by James Archibald of JAD, Inc. of Mustique, but the name of the official architectural company was Martin Jay Rosenblum & Associates of Philadelphia.
The villa, much like the island, is protected by its strict privacy practices. As I mentioned, no one can visit the island of Mustique without an invite or having rented a property or booked a hotel room, and no one can even fly overhead who doesn't have permission. The idea here is complete privacy, freedom, fantasy, and anything the heart desires – and no better person to help bring the magic to life, than Tatiana Copeland herself. Fun loving, outgoing, hands on, and always intrigued by a new experiences and adventure, Tatiana is the conductor, if you will, the master of ceremonies, along with the help of her discerning staff – her estate manager, butler, chef, housekeeping staff, gardener and houseman, who all help to create the experience of a lifetime.
Intrigued by the diversity in the décor I recognised from some of my own international travels, I called Copeland while sipping a glass of wine in the living room. I thanked her for the preparation taken by her staff to make everything so perfect for our arrival and asked her about the inspirations and influences of the home. She explained how she placed her stamp firmly on the design by dedicating ten years of her time and passion, attempting to create her own version of a magical Sultan's Palace, which she achieved beautifully.
Copeland shopped for furnishings, fixtures and textiles in Morocco, India, Syria, London, Tunisia and other far off lands. Her findings offer an elaborate mixture of texture and colour, marrying rich tones, heavy fabrics and antiqued metals with crystals, carvings, archways, mosaics and hidden nooks and crannies throughout this sensational domain.
The sprawling layout affords its guests a generous 10,000 square feet of opulent comfort, bejeweled with dazzling treasures and adorned with colourful jewel tones throughout its four luxurious, air conditioned, king-sized suites: Sultan, Pasha, Toucan and Palm. The silver furnishings in the living room and throughout the home are from India, while most of the lamps and chandeliers are from Morocco and Syria. Funny enough, and quite unexpectedly, two of the large chandeliers in the living room were left over from a casino that was being built in Las Vegas, of all places, while the art work is part of Copeland's personal collection from her travels around the globe. Some of the TV room finds are antiques from Bosnia. The décor takes an even more glamorous turn when entering the master pavilion, bejeweled in ornate gold leaf, the large master bed was inspired by Colin Tennant's Great House, while the accessories, fabric, kilms (tapestry carpets from Persia) and ceramics were all brought in from Morocco, Turkey, Indonesia and Bali.
This is to say nothing of the outstanding gastronomy you'll experience. Menus catering to both your liking and your needs are carefully thought out prior to your arrival. Food is purchased locally from either the Mustique market or shipped directly from St Vincent. Fruit and vegetables are locally grown in St Vincent as well. When guests request non-locally sourced foods, such as raspberries or strawberries, duck or lamb, no request is too difficult to oblige, as the staff at Toucan Hill manages to create these culinary masterpieces, seamlessly.
There's no shortage of ambience and romantic dining. Toucan Hill sets out to dazzle its guests right across the island. From candlelit dinners to sunset cocktails, from mouthwatering culinary adventures to private poolside yoga, therapeutic massages relieving your last bit of tension to private sailing excursions and everything in between.
The service at Toucan Hill is nothing short of spectacular. I know the word itself is over-used; however I couldn't be more sincere. Patricia and Jamal on island, along with the entire staff, are there for one sole purpose it would seem: to make your dreams come true. So charter a boat, soak up the sun on any one of the nine beaches, sip a delicious cocktail at sunset or dance the night away under the stars, perhaps even with the stars. At Toucan Hill the world is your oyster and I highly recommend you over indulge!


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All of the social networks including facebook are built on the grounds that just about everything should be shared-except the money those posts produce. These sites make use of content posted by public ro make money. The traditional social networking sites make its users post data, based on the content likes, sharing they use these analytics to make a record of your interests and target you for the advertising segments from their global advertisers. The social network gets paid for these but the actual content generator doesnt. Content poster will post the content and leave and the social network will be milking it right from there.
Here is yet another social networking site Bubblews!, which pays a share of the advertisement revenue from your content!. Hmm that sounds interesting right?.
At least two services are trying to change that. Bubblews, a social network that came out of out of an extended test phase last week, pays users for posts that attract traffic and advertisers. Another company, Bonzo Me, has been doing something similar since early July.
"I just feel like everyone on social networks has been taken advantage of for long enough," says Michael Nusbaum, a Morristown, New Jersey surgeon who created Bonzo Me. "Facebook has been making a ton of money, and the people providing the content aren't getting anything."
Bonzo Me is paying its users up to 80% of its ad revenue for the most popular posts.
Bubblews' compensation formula is more complex. It's based on the number of times that each post is clicked on or provokes some other kind of networking activity. To start, the payments are expected to translate into just a penny per view, comment or like. Bubblews plans to pay its users in $50 increments, meaning it could take a while for most users to qualify for their first paycheck unless they post material that that goes viral.
"No one should come to our site in anticipation of being able to quit their day job," Bubblews CEO Arvind Dixit says. "But we are trying to be fair with our users. Social networks don't have to be places where you feel like you're being exploited."
Bubblews is also trying to make its service worthwhile for users by encouraging deeper, thoughtful posts instead of musings about trifling subjects. To do that, it requires each post to span at least 400 characters, or roughly the opening two paragraphs of this story.
Technology analyst Rob Enderle believes Bubblews, or something like it, eventually will catch on.
"I don't think this free-content model is sustainable," Enderle says. "You can't sustain the quality of the product if you aren't paying people for the content that they are creating. And you can't pay your bills if all you are getting are `likes.'"
Gerry Kelly of San Francisco has already earned nearly $100 from Bubblews since he began using a test version in January. His Bubblews feed serves as a journal about the lessons he has learned in life, as well as a forum for his clothing brand, Sonas Denim.
Though Facebook is by far the largest social network, it has a history of irking users. People have complained when Facebook changed privacy settings in ways that exposed posts to a wider audience. They have criticized Facebook for circulating ads containing endorsements from users who didn't authorize the marketing messages.
ore recently, people were upset over a 2012 experiment in which Facebook manipulated the accounts of about 700,000 users to analyze how their moods were affected by the emotional tenor of the posts flowing through their pages. Facebook apologized.
Kelly still regularly posts on his Facebook page to stay in touch with friends and family, but says he is more leery of the service.
"They just take all your information and make all the money for themselves. It's insane," Kelly says.
Despite the occasional uproar, Facebook has been thriving while feeding off the free content of its 1.3 billion users. The Menlo Park, California, company now has a market value of about $180 billion, and CEO Mark Zuckerberg ranks among the world's wealthiest people with a fortune of about $30 billion, based on the latest estimates from Forbes magazine.
Advertisers, meanwhile, are pouring more money into social networks because that is where people are spending more time, particularly on smartphones. Facebook's share of the $140 billion worldwide market for digital ads this year is expected to climb to nearly 8%, or $11 billion, up from a market share of roughly 6%, or $7 billion last year, according to the research firm eMarketer.


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Crawford, Raanta reveal Winter Classic masksby Emerald Gao / Chicago Blackhawks
Special occasions require special threads, and NHL goalies generally rise to the occasion. Chicago netminders Corey Crawford and Antti Raanta will sport custom masks for the 2015 Winter Classic on Thursday, Jan. 1, and the Blackhawks Blog got a sneak peek after Monday's game against Nashville.
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Corey Crawford went for a sleek, clean look for his custom mask, matching his design to the team's white jerseys. (Photo by Chase Agnello-Dean/Chicago Blackhawks)
Antti Raanta's custom mask for the 2015 Winter Classic features the Chicago skyline, wintry details and a monochrome logo. (Photo by Chase Agnello-Dean/Chicago Blackhawks)


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Event box
Critter Creatures
Fun craft for kids creating small critters out of pom pom's! For ages 5+.
Space is limited, tickets will be handed out 15 minutes before the program starts.
Questions? Call Centerville Library at 510-795-2629
- Date:
- Tuesday, November 13, 2018
- Time:
- 3:30pm - 4:00pm
- Location:
- Community Meeting Room
- Library:
- Centerville Library
- Audience:
- Kids
- Categories:
- Crafts, Games, Play
The Library is wheelchair accessible. An ASL (American Sign Language) interpreter will be provided for this program if requested at least 7 days in advance. For assistance, please contact your library or email@example.com. Events subject to change or cancellation without prior notice.
All Alameda County Library events are free.