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Most of my music is affiliated with AdRev, a company most YouTube users will have heard of. But what is AdRev, what do they do and why did I decide to join them? Here's the story.
About AdRev, YouTube and content ID
AdRev (and other companies such as Audiam, TuneCore, etc) are YouTube Partner platforms that use the Content ID system to manage and administer copyrighted content on behalf of content owners. They in turn provide users with various information such as which videos their content is used in, tracking of unauthorized uses, viewership reports, and distribution of any monetization earnings.
Content ID is a popular digital fingerprinting system that content creators can use to easily identify and manage their copyrighted content on YouTube. Videos uploaded to YouTube are compared against audio and video files registered with Content ID by content owners, looking for any matches.
When a video is matched to Content ID registered content, a copyright notice will appear on the video, and the content owner may choose to take certain actions, such as:
- Clearing the claim and taking no further action
- Tracking the video's viewership statistics
- Monetizing the video by running ads against it
- Muting the audio that matches their music
- Or even blocking a whole video from being viewed
Many online based music composers, including me, have their content digitally fingerprinted via Content ID to help protect against unauthorized uses, and also use these YouTube Partner platforms to administer and manage their content.
What does this mean for me and my YouTube projects?
When a video is uploaded to YouTube that contains licensed, digitally fingerprinted music, a "matched third party content" copyright notice will appear alongside the uploaded video in the YouTube Video Manager (this typically appears shortly after uploading).
A copyright notice does not mean that copyrights have been infringed, and this shouldn't be confused with a YouTube "copyright strike". It's simply a notice to advise that YouTube has detected Content ID registered content within the video, and that further information/action is needed.
Again, if you've licensed the music from AudioJungle, you will be easily able to clear this notice and you shouldn't have anything to worry about.
Why are there ads running on my videos?
When unauthorized/unlicensed use of music is found in a YouTube video, it may have monetized ads placed over it by the YouTube Content ID system. Once you've used your AudioJungle license certificate to clear any copyright notices on your video, these ads will go away and you will be able to monetize the video yourself if you wish.
How to clear a YouTube copyright notice
Clearing a YouTube copyright notice is a very straightforward process. You can remove copyright notices in the following ways:
- Disputing the claim via YouTube's built-in form.
- If the music is administered via AdRev, using the AdRev Claim Clearance page is the quickest and most direct way to clear a claim. AdRev will send you an email confirmation once it has been cleared.
- Or by contacting the author directly via their AudioJungle profile page with a link to your YouTube video, where they can further assist with having the copyright notices removed as quickly as possible.
To clear a claim via YouTube, you simply need to let YouTube know that you have licensed the music and have the rights to use it. Simply choose to "dispute" the claim by clicking the "matched third party content" copyright notice next to the video in your Video Manager, or on your dedicated copyright notices page. After you click "file a dispute", select the option "I have a license or written permission from the proper rights holder to use this material".
In the "Reason for dispute" box, copy/paste the contents from your purchased license certificate (accessible via the Downloads section in your Envato Market account). You may also wish to include the statement "A license to use this royalty-free music by [Name of Author] was purchased from AudioJungle.net".
Once you submit the dispute, claims are usually cleared within 24 – 96 hours. If any issues arise, contacting the author directly via their profile page can often help to expedite clearing a claim as well.
- For help on finding your item purchase code & license certificate, see this article.
- You may also find it helpful to read YouTube's support article for users affected by copyright claims as well as YouTube's support article on submitting additional documentation to claim montezation rights.
Tips for clearing claims in advance
Uploading early as an "Unlisted" video
If you've licensed digitally fingerprinted music from AudioJungle, we recommend that you set your YouTube videos to "Unlisted" upon uploading, until all "matched third-party content" notices are cleared.
This will allow suitable time for any copyright notices to be cleared before the video is published, and ensure that you can monetize your video from the moment it goes live without any conflicts. Once the copyright notice has been removed, the video can then be set to "Public" and monetization can be activated on the video.
Whitelisting Channels
If you or your client regularly uses Content ID registered music by a particular author in your YouTube videos, or have used a piece of Content ID registered music in multiple YouTube videos, some YouTube Partner Platforms such as AdRev also support having an entire YouTube channel whitelisted. Whitelisting a channel will prevent any further copyright notices from appearing on future videos that contain music from that specific author.
To do so, you'll need to contact us. In your message simply provide:
- The contents of your purchased License Certificate(s)
- A link to the relevant YouTube channel (this may be your own channel or a client's channel, for example if you are producing videos for them)
Please feel free to contact us at any time with questions or concerns and we'll get back to you as soon as possible!


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abstract:The "Writerly Questions Series" is brought to you courtesy of Random House Canada who partners with BookBuffet. Look for this feature each Monday. The idea is we ask different authors the same set of questions designed to give readers a glimpse into the lives and writing mechanics of authors. It is fascinating to compare and contrast when you check the list to date at bottom. Today's author is Justin Cronin. Born and raised in New England, Justin Cronin is a graduate of Harvard University and the Iowa Writers Workshop. Awards for his fiction include the Stephen Crane Prize, a Whiting Writers Award, and a Pew Fellowship in the Arts. He is a professor of English at Rice University and lives with his wife and children in Houston, Texas. His newest novel, The Passage, is published by Doubleday Canada.
1. How would you summarize your book in one sentence?
Girl saves world.
2. How long did it take you to write this book?
Forty-seven years, but most of it in the last three.
3. Where is your favorite place to write?
Rome is nice. But usually I write in my office over the garage. I used to write IN the garage..
4. How do you choose your characters names?
Like my children's names, they seem to come from above.
5. How many drafts do you go through?
Three at least. In the second draft, I add. In the third, I cut. Often I have to do this more than once.
6. If there was one book you wish you had written what would it be?Currently, Joseph O'Neill's NETHERLAND
7. If your book were to become a movie, who would you like to see star in it?
I think Russell Crowe would make a great Agent Wolgast.
article:June 13, 2010 —
8. Whats your favourite city in the world?
Houston, TX, because my children live there. It's home.
9. If you could talk to any writer living or dead who would it be, and what would you ask?
Shakespeare. How did you do it?
10. Do you listen to music while you write? If so, what kind?
Only the music of the spheres.
11. Who is the first person who gets to read your manuscript?
My wife, Leslie.
12. Do you have a guilty pleasure read?
Reading is too virtuous an act to make me feel guilty.
13. Whats on your nightstand right now?
A galley of Alan Furst's new novel, SPIES OF THE BALKANS; Ian McEwan's SOLAR; Colum McCann's LET THE GREAT WORLD SPIN; Danielle Trussoni's ANGELOLOGY; Graham Green's THE HEART OF THE MATTER; three pairs of eyeglasses.
Also the new edition of The Last Tycoon--which, by the way, they are now calling The Love of the Last Tycoon, which is just not an improvement. I dont care what Fitzgerald wanted. He wanted to call Gatsby Trimalchio in West Egg, so I think we can dismiss his opinion on his own titles. Anyway, it is such a tragedy that book wasnt finished. The bits that weve got are so gorgeous.
14. What is the first book you remember reading?
SWALLOWS AND AMAZONS by Arthur Ransome.
15. Did you always want to be a writer?
I always liked to write. As for being a writer, that kind of crept up on me during my 20s.
16. What do you drink or eat while you write?
I don't eat, but I drink a lot of coffee. Diet Coke in the afternoon.
17. Typewriter, laptop, or pen & paper?
None of the above. I use a desktop computer with a screen the size of a baby pool. I can see four pages at a time. I sometimes compose on legal pads. I use colored drawing pencils because they're softer.
18. What did you do immediately after hearing that you were being published for the very first time?
It was long ago (1988), so I'm not sure. Probably I had to sit down for a few minutes, and then went for a long run.
19. How do you decide which narrative point of view to write from?
This decision always seems to be made for me by the kind of story I'm trying to tell. It's the one aspect of a novel I've never really had to think about very hard.
20. What is the best gift someone could give a writer?
Be nice to my children. And if you feel like doing some babysitting, that would be great.
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subset: commoncrawl


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The shelter strives to serve as a model for small, rural communities providing progressive animal care and they uphold their mission in everything they do. The mission of Lincoln County Animal Shelter is to provide a safe haven for the community's homeless animals, protect public safety and animal welfare, promote responsible pet ownership, and rehabilitate and rehome animals in need. As a division of the Sheriff's office, the shelter provides a plethora of resources for community pet owners, such as animal licensing, a food bank program, lost and found pet reporting, and humane education. Above all else, the Lincoln County Animal Shelter wants the pets and people of the local community to thrive.
Working together with the Animal Service Deputies and over 100 active volunteers, the shelter staff are dedicated to ensuring humane animal treatment, public safety, and a strong and harmonious human-animal bond. Every animal that comes through the shelter doors receives compassionate care, initial vaccinations, a microchip, a spay/neuter procedure, and a voucher for a free health exam from a local veterinarian upon adoption. Canines in the care of the shelter even go home with a leash, collar, 1-year license, and 2 free behavioral consultations.
Lincoln County Animal Shelter's primary objective is to place each and every animal into the most suitable, loving home. They continue to be a resource for pet owner's long after adoption in hopes of keeping animals happy, healthy, and safely in their forever homes.
Bring your furry friend along for a day of fun, swimming, sand, and sun! Agate Beach State Recreation Site offers ocean access, large sandy beaches, and stunning coastal views! The 18-acre state recreation site provides restrooms, a picnic area, and a large parking lot. The beach access trail runs from the parking lot through a tunnel under old highway 101 and opens up right onto the sand! There is even a freshwater stream on-site to wash off in the end of your beach day. Breathe in the salty air or dig for clams while your pup sprints through the sand, swims in the sea, and gets in that much-needed exercise!
Head on down to the Bijou Theatre in nearby Lincoln City, OR for the annual Dog Film Festival! This traveling event tours the country celebrating the love between dogs and people! Enjoy a medley of animated, documentary, and live-action short films from around the world featuring the 4-legged friends we know and love. Each film illuminates the beautiful relationship between pets and people. Entry to the event is $10 and a portion of the proceeds benefit the lifesaving efforts of the Lincoln County Animal Shelter. Bring your canine companion along for no extra charge and enjoy a pet-friendly movie date!


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You can call Tony Hawk skateboarding games many things, but realistic isn't one of them. Pulling off 10 trick combos is commonplace in the Tony Hawk universe. Skate 2 is much different. When you get past the initial character creation screen and begin the actual gameplay in the demo for Skate 2, you're instructed on how to push your board, and then you are told to make your way to a warehouse. From here, you're told that you can walk in Skate 2 by pressing the triangle button. You walk up the stairs, and meet your next objective. You are faced with a reasonable gap that you must ollie over in order to proceed. For veterans of the original Skate, this may seem like a simple task, however for people coming from Tony Hawk games, or rookies in general, it's not entirely simple and may require a couple of tries. To ollie in Skate 2, you must push the right analog stick down, and flick it upwards. You are also able to hold the right analog stick down, and flick it in a variety of other directions to do other tricks such as a kick flip.
After you jump over the gap, you're instructed to hop off your board once again, and move a garbage bin that is blocking the entrance to the skate park. You move objects by holding R1 and moving with the left analog stick. After this is accomplished, the real fun begins. After you enter the skate park, you are on a large ramp. You are instructed to create a "session marker," which allows you to warp back to that exact spot. You go on to meet Slappy, the owner of the park, and you're told to go back to the session marker to jump the gap while doing a grab with L2 or R2. After you complete this relatively simple task, you're instructed on how to do several tricks such as the ollie, and kick flip as explained above. The next objective is to do a couple of manuals by slightly pressing forward or backward on the right analog stick. You're then asked to flip out of it by doing any trick. You continue, and meet a photographer who wants you to get on top of a large platform by moving a ramp in to position. You can do a variety of tricks such as grinding a rail, or simply landing on the platform to complete this task. The same photographer then asks you to grind across a rail, which can be difficult at first, because unlike Tony Hawk games you have to land on the rail perfectly rather than pressing a button to hone in on the rail. It's somewhat difficult at first, but is ultimately satisfying.
The entire demo of the career mode is timed. You are given roughly five minutes to play the demo, but after completing each challenge mentioned above, you are give a little extra time to skate around the skate park, and work on some tricks. After you've completed the challenges, you'll probably have about six or seven minutes to enjoy yourself. For many, this may be the most enjoyable part of the demo, because you can challenge yourself by attempting difficult tricks, grinds, etc. It really captures the essence of skating.
The demo also features two multiplayer modes. One is called Spot Battle and the other is Hall of Meat. In spot battle, you take turns with other players trying to land a trick over the same gap. The player with the highest score wins. In Hall of Meat, you again take turns with other players attempting to inflict the most pain on yourself going over a gap. Once again, the player with the highest score wins.
The Skate 2 demo is fun and rather frustrating at the same time. For those that assume that Skate 2 is going to be similar to the arcade style that the Tony Hawk series is known for, they may not enjoy the demanding technicality that Skate 2 requires. However, fans of the genre that have grown tired of the Tony Hawk series may enjoy the difference in style. Landing a difficult trick in Skate 2 gives players a very rewarding feeling. If you're interested in skateboarding games, you should download the demo, and play through it a few times to form an opinion. Based on the demo, it's certainly a rental at the very least.


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Category Archives: ASTRO-BITES™
AQUARIUS ♒ Full Moon Lunar Eclipse October 8, 2014: Astro-Lumination™ Psychic Insights by Rita
CAPRICORN ♑ Full Moon Lunar Eclipse October 8, 2014: Astro-Lumination™ Psychic Insights by Rita
SAGITTARIUS ♐ Full Moon Lunar Eclipse October 8, 2014: Astro-Lumination™ Psychic Insights by Rita
Scorpio's Past Life, Present Lesson: That's enough sex and heroin!
I know not all of you Scorpios are sex addicts, drug addicts, and dominatrices. Anymore. In fact, I know you feel insulted that I would even imply that you aren't past that stage now, that you aren't above it all, and I know that (if you've evolved enough) you don't want to be reminded of the basic thing that you once were (according to you). But is there such a thing as a basic Scorpio? Not at all. It doesn't matter which day or decan you were born; if you're a Scorpio you all share a common trait: the ability to reincarnate, and you can and will likely have to reinvent yourself many times in your life.
I've seen some of the most intense, focused, self-destruction taking place in all kinds of Scorpios — not just the addicts. I've seen the destruction on the emotional level, the physical level, and the psychological. When Scorpio is going to crash and burn, trust me, they've planned it, they know what they are doing, and you aren't going to stop them. I'm not implying that Scorpio has suicidal tendencies; it just looks that way. Why come into this life with an apparent master plan to blossom and grow only to spontaneously ignite at will and end it all? There is a good reason and having been there, done that (and in the process of rising again, personally, so to speak) I will explain. I feel I'm an authority!
LIFE. DEATH. REBIRTH. While it may seem extreme, living, dying, and being born again are all part of Scorpio's past life experiences. Of course they've lived before. But they've lived and died and reincarnated more times in one lifetime than most souls will ever see. Of course Scorpio needs to learn that being independent is good for them. Scorpio needs to learn that no matter how many times they think they got it wrong, they actually got it very right, 'failures' and all. Many Scorpios will say they feel they've lived a thousand times before and they are usually right. It does get a little tiresome but it makes for such excellent past life regression sessions!
The most important thing that Scorpios need to learn in their current lifetimes — whichever one they are in — is to love themselves more than they did in the life they lived before. I know what it's like to be a Scorpio and alternately and simultaneously love and loathe myself. It took me two Saturn tours to finally understand that I don't have to live hard, crash hard, and symbolically die hard to show others what it's like to be me. I finally learned that I am not here to each anyone anything. Well, maybe I'm illuminating people's paths when I feel it's time to go up in flames!
Scorpio, love yourself, Even the dark parts of yourself that you'd sooner set on fire and pretend you never knew. Love everything about yourself even when you feel no one else does. Because you never know which lifetime you will decide will be your last. And while you rule life, death, and rebirth, all of this is voluntary — you don't have to do it again! So, if this is to be your last life (as most of you will chime) make each reinvention of yourself better, stronger, and brighter than the last!
I know you're coming back, anyway. You're the original Badass. See you next time. 😉
Leo's Past Life, Present Lesson: This ain't no monarchy, baby. DIY!
This one's for Skooter who made the mistake of telling me he's a Leo. Well, everyone knows that Leos may have been someone important in a past life, if one subscribes to such a thing, but this time around this is not the case. While many of them still walk around gathering subjects to do their work, sooner or later Leo learns (in this incarnation) that if they want something done they have to do it themselves. Nothing will be handed to Leo this time around. While they may have many willing friends who will lend a hand if they are not put upon, there will always be that one friend who reminds Leo that he's no king in this jungle. Simply put, this time around Leo will make their own way, do their own work, clean up their own mess, and learn to support himself. It's a big jungle out there, Leo. You look great but you'll have to brush your own hair this time!
The Scorpio Parent: Failure is not an option but death is!
I think the sign Scorpio is the one who suffers parenting the most. To a Scorpio, under normal circumstances, a parenting 'fail' is like getting the death card in the tarot: it's over, you can't go back and redo it, it is what it is, game over. When Scorpio does it 'wrong', according to their estimation, they don't (always) lash out at other people; what Scorpio does is punish itself. Ever see the zodiac art with the scorpion turning tail and stinging itself? Exactly.
The Scorpio parent can get so fixed on perfect child rearing that any perceived mistake requires the only acceptable act of contrition: self-destruction. Though Scorpio types are able to (burn themselves down to the ground and) rise from the ashes while making it look effortless, hip, and sexy, only Scorpio will ever know the depth of torment they put themselves through before, during, and after their glorious resurrection. Part of the before and during process involves accounting for every parenting fail Scorpio can think of (Scorpio's ability to resurrect past transgressions, including their own, is legend). It doesn't matter if the perceived failure included, but was not limited to, the original procreation (or fornication); Scorpio will go as far back as they deem necessary. They may even spontaneously regress into their own uterine limbo where they are pretty f*****g sure they premeditated future mistakes.
Do you know what Hara-kiri is? Scorpio does. (Good thing they've got that whole phoenix routine down.) Scorpio, there's no need to expect your version of perfect parenting from yourself. Because there is no such thing as perfect parenting. And unless you have a Virgo ascendant like I do, this should be pretty easy to understand: do your best. Just do your best and remember that your spawn will turn out just fine so long as you forgive yourself the same way you taught them to forgive everyone else. Happy parenting, Scorp!
It's July 4th! Make sure your friends pee on a tree if you go missing!
ASTRO-MINDER™ Thursday, July 3, 2014: If you feel like things are picking up speed it's because they are. Mercury is direct and gaining momentum. Most of you will notice there are suddenly several irons in the fire and they look a whole lot like the irons from the end of May; that's because they are. This is a good thing, trust me! You do trust me, don't you? C'mon. I'd never hurt you. I LOVE you too much!
This is the third and last time you'll have to go over these same wrinkles to iron them out for good! So be sure to do what you have to do, get it right this time, use some spray starch if you have to, but get things smoothed out as best as you can. We've talked about the sense of discomfort that we will feel around the 4th. If tomorrow, July 4th celebrations, in the USA aren't really appealing to you because you're feeling kind of "off", then mind your instincts and just stay at home.
If you have pets, of course, protect their sensitive ears from fireworks and be sure they are secured so they don't bolt out of your yard and into a road or street. My pretty chocolate labrador went missing one year for many hours and I thought I would never see her again. Monty, my 20-year-old, thought to, um, water a tree with his scent so the dog could smell him and her way home if she'd become lost or was disoriented. It sure did work: Truffle showed up exhausted and a bit worse for the wear, and now I never cease marveling at the power of pee!
Be safe, my friends. Don't drink or do drugs and then drive ANYTHING because you could kill someone or a few people and you'll likely live to see the rest of your life in prison. That's if you don't end up in a vegetative state the rest of your life. Think on that.
God bless you all! Happy 4th!
The Water Carrier
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Precious water carrier, just when you get something you want, something you've wanted so long, you don't feel very good about it. Perhaps some long fought and wanted goal or situation materializes only to leave you feeling empty. Is that the way you feel, Aquarius? Or rather, is that what happens every time — some sense of sadness or apathy overcomes you when you know you should feel happy?
Perhaps the reason for this is complex: you work hard, for years even, on some goal or project, only to find when all is said and done and the bird in the bush is in hand, that you don't know if you wanted the bird at all. Maybe it's more simple than the aforementioned and when the thrill of the proverbial chase is over and the prize is yours, you don't want the prize! You miss the chase!
Thrill of the moment as it may seem, something eludes you. There is something you want in life more than anything and you don't have that thing yet or the chase has not resulted in what you want. What you need to contemplate now, water bearer, is that what you want is what you can have when you release the expectation of how you will feel when you get it. This is such a general want that I suspect it transcends many levels. It does not appear to be some material thing. It does not appear to be some accolade or acclaim.
What you are missing in your life is something life essential. Perhaps a larger family. Perhaps a good marriage and bond. Perhaps it's just the knowing that when you want something bad enough the chase is as good as the prize.
Think clearly, Aquarius, about what could be bothering you. You achieve, you excel, you have drive and determination: perhaps what you want more than anything right now is something that requires none of the above — that is is something that is not rooted in the material world or in its applause?
Contemplate: There is much to think about, Aquarius. And conversely, there is nothing to think about. There is something you greatly desire that means everything to you and pales in comparison to the material. Release expectation, my friend, release it and let go and what you desire most will manifest without any effort of your own and you will be thus fulfilled.
The Seagoat
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
You are feeling down, Capricorn? I am not surprised. It looks to me from my vantage point, that you have done your best to the point of ad nauseum. You feel no one appreciates you no matter what you do and that you are somehow overlooked by the Universe. But what you are overlooking is there is someone out there, someone you know, who is wishing and wanting the best for you.
Some recent situation or something that transpired between you and someone close to you or a potential mate has left you feeling in the dumps. But what is that for, Capricorn? If you know you've done you best and given things you all, you have done what you knew best to do.
What you need right now, my friend, is someone to talk to, someone you trust can hear you out without making you feel bad about it. Perhaps you feel bad enough that you won't talk at all. But if you do that you will miss a chance to hear what someone who loves you wants to say — isn't that worth the risk you feel you are taking in asking for help? It should be, Capricorn, and if you don't ask for some support you won't get any, either.
Take some time to isolate the way you feel right now no matter what is going on in your life. In that way, you can place your feelings into a box or slot where they can at least be categorized. Then and only then, please reach out to someone who is offering some kind of support or who you feel comfortable with to help pull you out of the way you feel. I guarantee you will feel better, so please do give this a try.
Contemplate: If you feel bad already, if you don't ask for help from someone you know cares for you and loves you, you won't get the support you need. You've been friend and ear to many and now it's your turn to ask for help.
The Archer
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Sagittarius, you've never been known to solve problems well, and in fact, if you're honest with yourself, you're something of a maker of mischief! You let your emotions — or need for drama — get the best of you and I dare say it's because you have a need for some dramatics in your life. I'm not putting you down, dear Archer, I'm just saying that just as some people love movies, drink, or fantasy, you've need for something tumultuous happening in your life or you feel off kilter!
Think of it this way, Sag, if you understand that you need some excitement, consider if you're looking for trouble when you're bored. If you lash out at loved ones to cause a stir or strife, consider you are playing a game but no one else is playing with you nor will they easily forget your need for dramatics.
You want peace and harmony yet you want to upset the tea cart. You want balance and ease yet you easily drive everyone in the house mad. I hope you have a patient handler these days, Sag, as I, for one, would not do well with your monkey business! If you go now and upset the still tea cart, do not complain about the biscuits strewn later that you are responsible to clean up. If you're that bored that you need drama, rent a dramatic movie.
By all means if this makes any sense to you, correct the major errors in your thinking and go your own way. After all, if anyone's tolerated your antics of late, they will be there to help you make sense of your need for stimulation!
Contemplate: Just because you're bored or the status quo is not dramatic enough, Sag, does not mean you are allowed to just let the monkeys out of their cages. Control yourself, do damage control, and hope that your handler forgives you.
The Scorpion
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Scorpio, someone new is in your life or someone new is coming. Trust me, I checked this one with two other sources because I am perplexed as you may be! I even checked a cheap app because this is so out of the box! At least my box — I digress.
The newness factor is not one that may necessarily be a romantic situation though I will admit — and do not hurt me! — that it appears romantic, to say the least. Perhaps you are already in a good relationship where there was stagnation and now there is new movement: you will be able to tell if this newness is already in that relationship, something like a change of some kind or even a change in your view of this person. If you are in a romantic relationship and you don't like where it's going, suspect you've not been dealt with fairly or there is some level of lie or dishonesty present, then more than likely someone new emerges on the relationship scene to balance that factor. I hope my readers are not married Scorpions! This emphasis is on seeing someone in a new light, light perhaps shed on an illusion presented, or some level of being mislead. This does NOT mean that all Scorpions are being lied to, only the Scorpions whose guts have been indicating the same will get what I'm writing. Bear with me, please!
This new person, newness, seems like a new person emerges or the person you are now involved with is showing his or herself in their true colors. Whether that is good or bad only you could tell me. I could give you personal accounts of what I'm thinking and muck this up further.
My friends, fans, and everyone else follows me because "Rita tells it like it is" but I feel like I about to yank on some molars here or bring a very bright spark to others! I do not like writing my own but in this case, I'm kind of having a good time with it as I have not been happy with the status quo, personally. If you think I write astrology for kicks, you are wrong! I write it to help others and like last week, I have a WTF moment myself!
Try being me for a moment with thousands of followers, everywhere, and try removing yourself from the equation! I do it with prayer, that is all I can say.
Scorpio natives, I don't color anything about your scopes because you of all people would see right through me. What I see is someone new entering your life if your love life is unsatisfactory, if you've felt you've been lied to or dealt with unfairly, and if your love life has shown no issue, it's a very exciting time for you, indeed! It tells me you've made the right choices and you are partnered with the right persons. If you are partnered with Aries, doubly so, though there will be plenty of power tussle to entertain you — but it will not smother you.
The time is right to see this newness, this reality of the other person's projection, and to act accordingly! Scorpio is promised a year filled with much luck and romance and in Chinese astrology writings I have even told you that out of the blue you change your strong willed mind and marry someone or take up house play with them. If you are in a relationship that does not suit you, the Full Moon in Leo illuminated flaws to make them visible for all to see, including you. The influence of heavenly bodies in Aries, such as they were or are, reminds you to take care of yourself, of number one, as no one else seems to be much concerned for your welfare: that should indicate which personal relationship I'm talking about.
The time is now, dear Scorpion, Phoenix, Eagle, to rise up from the recent reality of substandard and seek this newness, this new reality that you have created, if only via the need to have your needs met, to be treated with dignity and honesty, not lies and illusion.
Scorpio, all I can say is you know best, you know who you are dealing with, you know where the lies are, and who is telling them. If this seems strange to you — be glad! I cannot see your natal chart of course. But in general, Scorpio is advised his or her instincts are correct, if false and fallacy are present, they will soon be illuminated for all — and I mean ALL — to see. You will not suffer this but the karma of the next person should be barometer and detector.
Contemplate: If things have been great, Scorpio, your relationships are with particular signs, sun or rising. I dare not post what they are for many reasons. If your relationship has been bumpy or questionable, someone new enters to correct the imbalance and you have done your time, per se, and taught your students their lessons.
The Scales
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Someone in your world, Libra, makes a lot of mistakes and expects you to either correct them or fix them in some way. That is not fair, Libra, whether friend, family, or business partner, you are not here to correct the missteps of the next person. You've invested a lot of time in this person, likely years, talking, talking, telling, advising, but this person is either chronologically younger than you or less mature than you are. What are you doing, Libra? Raising someone else's young? You need to realize that your job is not the role of therapist or mentor in this case: your role has a hierarchy of some sort and I cannot clearly, without birth chart, see what your role exactly is. Suffice it to say you are not this persons MOTHER.
With that said, if someone's in some legal trouble, they need an attorney. If their life is in disarray, they need professional help. If this person I'm referring to is a work related partner, then your role is to back out of the personal arena — there is no room for error here — your association with this person could cause your reputation damage or question much as any affiliation with persons of questionable nature would cause you harm personally and or professionally. I mean to spare no words here: this person is a liability to you, yours, and your own interests.
The thing you need to do now is to back away from the situation if you feel that a good talk is going to cause more damage or connect you more closely than you should be. As sad as it sounds, and if this is a personal relationship or a family member, I am quite sorry. But the responsibility is yours now, dear Libra, to recognize that this is not healthy for you and if you are not heard by this person once, twice — then three times is too many.
Contemplate: Invest no further in a person or situation that is bound to bring you professional or personal harm. This harm could be in the form of damage to reputation or even legal troubles. God bless you, dear Libra, steer clear of those who are not aligned with the positive.
The Virgin
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
You're in a situation, analytic Virgo, where you're dealing with a person who is not objective, is prone to over emotion, and doesn't always see things clearly. It's not the best situation to be too understanding of the next person when they don't know what they are doing — including when they are not playing fair or are playing on your emotions. Be strong, Virgo, you are not wrong this time, though you are too close to this situation to see what I'm saying clearly. So, I will clarify for you.
Some people are very good at being objective about even themselves. Others are not so good at objectivity and often they don't know the difference between emotion and logic. You, of all signs, are the analyst and can analyze a situation quickly, completely, and accurately. The person or situation, likely linked to a close relationship (that goes for close business partnerships) is so muddled in their thinking, thanks to the Full Moon, that they cannot see their own shadow for what it is. What you are prone to doing now, dear Virgo, is defining shadow from illusion for this person and this must be nipped in the bottom immediately. You are not responsible for the emotions, feelings, perceptions, or consequences of another's actions, so this is not the time for sympathy for this person. It is a time for you to step back, go your own way, and be yourself. You can be supportive but you cannot live another's life.
Where you are erring is trying to understand the next person. Why bother with that when you don't see life and situations through their eyes? Of course you want to sympathize with this person but what good will that do them? Do you like being an emotional crutch? I doubt it. What you need to do is understand that while you, of all people, cannot understand the next person — after all, you are analyst, not therapist! — you can understand the situation the next person is in from a cool, detached, objective point of view. Perhaps the best course right now is to remove yourself from the emotional entanglement of the person in question and live your life as you usually do and when asked, state your views and opinions of this person's situation with a sense of detachment.
Think like this, dear Virgo: you are you, that person is themselves. You see what you see but I guarantee they do not see what you do. You role is merely to provide objective analysis of what you see wrong in their thinking much as an analyst interprets the raw data with no emotional involvement. Let the next person hear what you have to say and eliminate yourself from the equation.
Contemplate: Your ability to see things for what they are may not be the best received at this time, Virgo, but you would do well to state the obvious no matter what the next person thinks.
The Lion
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Relax, lovely Leo! Cooperation does not mean you are a door mat or means that you are lowering your (very high) standards or somehow bending over. It means you're mature enough to know that if each side gives a little slack, the rope is never too tight to adjust. Right now, you may be feeling that to get something you want you have to give in to something you don't want to do or become someone you don't want to be. That's not the way to look at it, dear Leo, that's not the way at all.
You are often too rigid in your thinking and sometimes it's your way or no way. That's a bit overbearing, is it not? You wouldn't want the next person to be as rigid or strict as you are anyway, whether you admit this to yourself or not. It's like this: two wrongs don't make a right, two lefts still make a left, but two RIGHTS always make RIGHT! Do you see how that works? If you and I are on opposite sides of a rope and we are both pulling in opposite directions, eventually one of us will fall and it won't be like winning a game of tug of war, and in fact, I may be upset that you pulled so hard I fell and skinned my knee. But if you give a little slack to me and I pull more, and you keep giving me some slack, eventually I won't pull my end at all and we can roll up that rope and play another game. Likewise, especially in partnerships and relationships of all kinds, both parties going in opposite directions will result in tension and even discontent with the situation. While at times you may say, "Well, I did my best, I pulled — that is what I was supposed to do according to the rules, anyway, and since he/she won't play fair, I won't play at all" you're wrong to assume that giving in to the next person means forfeiture of the game.
Life is not a game, Leo, and life is not meant to be lived rigidly without regard for the next person's needs or wishes. Life, love, and partnerships work out better when at least one of the parties makes it easier to move forward, even if that means you cut the next person some slack.
Contemplate: Leo, this is a good time to practice cooperation, compromise, and even letting the next person have their way for a while. Otherwise you'll just end up in another stalemate and you've been down that road before. Relax a little, give in: this will produce the best effect at this time.
The Crab
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
As hopeful as you've been lately, dear Cancer, you seem to be running out of hope-steam. What's wrong, little crab? Feeling down, depleted, somewhat defeated, as if what you wish for will never come true, will never happen, that you're just down in the dumps?
Welcome to the real world, Cancer, it's not clinical depression.
What you're feeling is just the transient sadness of the stress of trying hard for so long that you don't know where to pull anymore hope from. But what if I tell you that this very mood you're in is not going to help you, it's going to make matters worse? People can pick up on others energy much like a dog can sense when another animal is weak or fearful and that sense causes the first dog to act accordingly. You need to understand that delays, obstacles, and even lack of progress is a natural consequence of being in the world. You are not interacting with only yourself, Cancer, you are interacting in a world of people and sometimes that means others are going through the very same thing. Likewise, you are very sensitive, your ruling planet is the Moon, and that means your are more sensitive and emotional than usual, more irritable and demanding during the Full Moon phase. The Full Moon was only yesterday, dear Cancer, and it also has a typical effect for about four days before and four days after. What that means for you is that even the usual ups and downs of cycles are more intensely felt and emoted by you during the Full Moon. Give yourself a break, Cancer, and understand this about yourself: your moods are your own but they can also be self-defeating, so take it easy on yourself and don't read too much into what the next person is feeling or you won't be able to feel your own feelings at all — you'll be all mucked up in an emotional state that is already difficult for you to understand.
What's happening now is not only cyclical, it's expected. We want what we want and we want it now is what some children say during tantrum but you are not a child and you are fully capable of understanding that delays just happen. It does not mean that what you want isn't going to happen, that it never will, that it's all going wrong, that no one understands you, that WOE IS ME, woe is me, my life is a mess and I just want to give up, and…everyone's out to get me! And I'm trying my best but it's just never good ENOUGH and…and…
Do you see what a downer I just wrote? Do you see how completely pointless it is to just sit there mired in your unhappiness? That's what you're doing. Stop doing that!
What you need, the next break, is just around the corner! But if you sit there lamenting and telling the next person that you're not, you're going to miss your mark. So settle down, sweet, sensitive Cancer, it's not as bad as you think it is but if you keep thinking the walls of Jericho are going to tumble down, they certainly will.
Contemplate: Your next break is on the way and around the corner, Cancer, but you lose control of your emotions, lose control of your positive energy, you're going to miss that break and it will be harder, next time, to catch again. Chin up, dry it up, think logically, not emotionally.
The Twins
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Gemini, while you're no usual trouble maker, sometimes your emotions escape you and often at the wrong moment — not because you always want it that way — but later you're not that happy with the outcome and then you've more to say that isn't always received well. In personal relationships this causes a bounce back effect: the next person isn't happy with something you express and then you aren't happy with what's expressed back to you. What this does is shakes the entire relationship and isn't very comfortable. This applies to all kinds of relationships including work, partnerships, romantic, friendships, and even family relationships.
We often forget amid responsibility that we are part of the situation and that we may be contributing something to the issue at hand that isn't helping at all. We need to step back and analyze, think "bullet time" from the Matrix movies when you're in such a state that you want to say whatever is on your mind, and slow things down before you say something that makes matters worse. I'm not saying don't say anything at all, I'm more or less asking you to consider your timing and response before speaking your words.
We're all human, precious Gemini, but as such we are also prone to the effects of stress, tension, and challenge. There are better times and ways to express what you want and need to say and the heat of the moment isn't the best time — I think you can agree with that. What I want you to try is this: Step back from a situation that arises that challenges you, raises your blood pressure, or otherwise pisses you off, if you will. Invoke Bullet Time — tell yourself it's just a gear you shift into or a button you press — and instantly you are an observer, objective, impartial. Then, think of what either party could say or do that would calm the situation down or at least table it for a time. This will bring the peace back into your relationship and will restore enough balance to later discuss the situation with less intensity.
Contemplate: Chinese proverb: Think before you speak. Not the easiest to do, but the best for your relationships in the long run. Also, offer the same concept to the next person and you might be surprised at how relieved the next person is. Much love to you, dear Gemini, we do love you very much!
The Bull
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
For every problem there is a solution, dear Taurus. And for every confusion there is clarity. While you may feel stuck in a rut of some kind, unable to make a decision, come to a conclusion, or even know which way to go, you are advised to stop for a moment and think. You've asked for help which is hard for you to do. You've reached out only to find there is no one reaching back, perhaps. At this time you are still to not give up hope at all even if you feel you cannot move forward, backward, or even forward to take two steps back.
You've invested much in others only to find your investment not returned. That's okay, now that you've learned to be more selective about even your friendships and alliances. If you are considering a solution that causes you to invest or give more for something you need or want and feel like it's not a fair trade, listen to your instincts and find another route! You've toiled at some particular thing, aspect of your life, or situation that you want to change that a little more time invested in research or thinking isn't going to cause you more difficulty than you've already endured. You have some time on your side, so contemplate what your time, energy, and even friendship is worth. Are you not just as deserving of what you want and need as those you've personally helped before? Think on that, too.
If you find yourself quite unable to get the help, support, or need you have met, trust in a good friend or trusted adviser to help you see things from another point of view. You may very well find an option you didn't notice and the people who are your friends, those who are willing to be there for you, that love and care for you, are going to be very apparent at this time.
Contemplate: Just because there's a detour in the road doesn't mean you will never reach your destination. Work around complexities best you can and don't lose hope. It's going to be okay.


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Change a Dog's Life…and Yours Too!?
A client of mine rescued a dog from a local county shelter. The dog was cute and scruffy tan terrier mix. Sort of similar to the famous movie star dog Benji. My client had gone to the county shelter hoping to find the perfect furry companion for her and her family. She didn't have any particular breed in mind and was hoping to feel a connection with one of the dogs. The dog hadn't come from any particular pure-bred pedigree. He was potty trained, friendly, a little mischievous and always interested in investigating everything and everyone around him. As in most cases with dogs that are adopted from an animal shelter, very little else was known about him or his history. Based on the connection she had with the dog, she decided that it would be worth a chance bring him home and see if he fits in with the family.
She scheduled a brief appointment with me to discuss her newest family member and get my opinion. As we chatted about her new furry companion, I could tell that they were hitting it off well. It was evident to me that the dog was gentle, warm and loved people. He would listen to her every word and stayed close by her side. I could feel that this dog had a really calming presence about him and made you feel good just to be around him. I mentioned to my client that her new furry friend had a really calming and healing nature about him. I suggested to her that he would be a good therapy dog for the elderly and for children. She was delighted, but shocked to hear this. She thought that she just had a sweet dog that seemed to like her. She had no indication that he was meant for a higher purpose of helping others.
After the consultation, she thought deeply about our conversation. She thought that it would be interesting to see what skills her new rescue dog possessed. Could he have a special gift of healing and calming? Could he be meant for more than just being her family dog? Could he have a special gift that she should nurture? So, she figured what the heck. Let's give it a go. She enrolled him into some classes and certification programs.
He excelled in every class and passed every test with flying colors. He is now certified and has logged hundreds of hours of service work. He really enjoys helping others and everybody loves when he comes for a visit. He is in high demand and has become a local celebrity.
Both of them visit nursing homes, hospitals, children's reading programs and numerous other facilities where he can provide healing, joy and love to everyone around him. Virtually every day they hop in the family vehicle and head to a new destination. They both enjoy the volunteer work and gain great pleasure and purpose in supporting others. Not only has the scruffy rescue dog's life changed but, his human companion's life has changed as well. We all have a purpose, even our furry companions.
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I've talked about this before to a degree but must again. As a believer in the paranormal who always looks at things skeptically, and one who has spoken to many skeptics, there is, in my opinion, nothing that can change the minds of the hardest skeptics. No proof could ever convert everyone. I once spoke to a guy who had an answer for everything. If you saw a ghost, or some sort of paranormal event, it just meant that you were hallucinating from some cause, whether it be your tap water, or medicine you're on, or the air you breathe. He really felt that way.
Over the years there have been many excellent pictures and videos taken, as well as sound bites and everything in between, that were as close as you could get to being indisputable evidence. Take the Brown Lady of Raynham Hall as example.
That picture was taken in 1936 and printed in both Country Life magazine (which it was taken for) and Life magazine. It wasn't supposed to be a ghost picture taking event, the camera guys were in Raynham Hall just taking pictures for Country Life when they got this. After being interviewed and the film studied, it was revealed that there was no reason to not believe the two who captured the picture, and the film was not tampered with, meaning the picture is legit.
Yet there are still skeptics of it. Even world famous scientist Bill Nye recently said there's no such thing as ghosts, which pissed me off because if he's a scientist, he shouldn't be that definite on an answer. He says there has been no indisputable proof, which is fine because there's not, but to then say there's no such thing is not like a scientist, in my opinion. "We don't know" would have been a better answer.
This is the case with all evidence. And now in the modern age where we can create anything with computers, it is harder than ever to capture anything paranormal and have it be indisputable evidence that everyone would believe.
Until now, apparently. Some ghost hunting folks were sanctioned by the government of Australia to do an extensive hunt of some building there and during their investigation they captured a lot of evidence of someone they call Sir Noface, including one piece that is apparently indisputable evidence of ghosts.
They're taking this evidence and story on tour and I'm going to go to one of their stops around here in late August.
I'm not saying they didn't get what they claim, but I am skeptical. Furthermore, if what they say is true, why hasn't it been all over the news? Wouldn't this be as big as indisputable proof of aliens, or Bigfoot, or Nessie?
The guy who made the film, Chad Calek, has another gig hosting a paranormal show on cable called Paranormal State, which he starred in and directed. As far as ghost shows go, it's among the worst. It has been debunked and isn't done very well at all. Hell, even Ghost Hunters has been debunked, which upset me greatly. I thought they were all for the greater good of the cause, but it turns out money speaks volumes.
I read a review of the movie that goes on to talk about how the film plays out, and even Chad seems to be all about getting the truth and not buying into it immediately, but, just his presence is going to make the movie less credible. I guess I'll find out when I see it.
Have you heard of this? What do you think? I can't wait to see what they got, regardless of if it's indisputable or not. But I'm still going to look at this from a skeptical mind. If you'd like to check out more on this, go to their website SirNoFace.com.
How many times did I say "indisputable" in this piece? If you answered 1037 times, you're off by one.


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Working in schools
If you would like Simon to come and visit your school/library/festival, you can contact him at email@example.com. His fee is £175 per session (in keeping with Scottish Book Trust's and the Society' of Author's recommendation of the minimum author engagement fee), plus travel expenses and accommodation where necessary.
Click HERE to view some very fine follow on work by Burnside Primary School in Carnoustie.
Festivals so far:
(He is always delighted when he is asked to visit schools and libraries - children's writers seldom meet their audience otherwise.)


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Why Do We Love The NFL Draft?
The biggest story of the NFL draft today, by far, was the Cleveland Browns and their first round picks of Joe Thomas (OT) at #3 and Brady Quinn (QB) at #22. As a tribute to my roommate who is a die-hard Brownie, I decided to let him guest-write a column on the blog (even if it is to the dismay of fellow Raven fans). He will share his thoughts about a memorable day for a franchise that has been down in the NFL cellar for so many years and is notorious for draft-day debacles and first round busts.
Here it is:
At the end of every April, the sports world seems to stop for the NFL draft. Never mind the NBA or the NHL playoffs, the draft is all that matters. But why? Well the obvious reason is because ESPN and every other major media outlet tells us so. But they also throw NASCAR down our throats, and I still haven't bought into that.
The true reason is that the NFL draft can provide fans with hopes and dreams like no other sport. The draft provides the type of fresh start that is only attainable in real life by joining the witness protection program. As a die-hard Cleveland Browns fan, I have been through many drafts with highly touted picks. Some come through, but unfortunately many for the Browns don't (Tim Couch, William Green, Gerard Warren, Courtney Brown). But no matter what, the draft always provides hope that eventually a pick will come through and my team will return to glory. And I know that every NFL fan feels the same way about their team and their picks.
When the Browns drafted Joe Thomas I was excited, but surprised, that they passed up on a quarterback who had himself dreamed of playing for the Browns. Now all the attention was on Brady Quinn, who as the 4th rated player on Mel's big board, and would certainly be drafted very soon. Yet, as team after team passed on Quinn, we all began to wonder how far he could fall. It seemed like the farther Quinn fell, the more sympathetic of a figure he became, and the more the announcers and media proclaimed their disbelief that the future Tom Brady or Dan Marino was still available. (By the way I didn't make those comparisons up. http://www.sportsline.com/nfl/story/10155503). Certainly many later round teams and fans began to hope that he would fall to them.
Quinn and Condon were relatively cool under the intense scrutiny, which will certainly help the duo as the quarterback struggles through the inevitable rookie learning curve. Finally, at pick 22, the Browns pulled the surprise of the draft and the audience was finally spared from having to repeatedly see a picture of a 4-year old Quinn in Browns gear. When the Browns drafted Brady Quinn I could barely talk. My roommate, a proud Ravens fan, actually congratulated me on the pick as if somehow I had something to do with it. And of course, I accepted.
Today is a new start for every team and NFL fan. Who knows what picks will actually turn into stars? Right now I really don't care. All I know is that today I feel on top of the world. I hope you feel the same.
-Will Karim (Roommate of columnist Matthew Allinson)


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Self Regulation and Obesity
Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine published research that indicated children who lack self regulation exhibit excessive weight gain. This was a longitudinal study of 1061 children. The children participated in self regulation tasks at ages 3 and 5 years old. They were then followed until 12 years of age with body mass index (BMI) being measured 6 times throughout that time. The children who exhibited a decrease in the ability to self regulate had the highest BMI and the most rapid weight gain.
Curious to know do you observe this trend in children with a lack of self regulation?
Reference: Lori A. Francis; Elizabeth J. Susman
Self-regulation and Rapid Weight Gain in Children From Age 3 to 12 Years
Arch Pediatr Adolesc Med. 2009;163(4):297-302.


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First, a shout out to my favorite daughter, Rosalyn E. Plotzker, M.D., who became privileged to use those last two initials on May 29:
OK, that happy news should partially inoculate us against this downer of a portion.
Why spy? That is not meant as a reference to a 1960's TV show. It's a key question relating to this week's Torah reading. Moses sends out 12 tribal leaders (extra credit: What tribe is not represented and why?) to spy out the land of Canaan. They are to gather very specific information concerning the land's inhabitants (strong or weak, few or many), how fortified the cities are, and how fertile the land is (and bring back some fruit). That's it. This isn't a feasibility study ("can we?") nor is the information to be used for making a decision ("should we?"). The decision to conquer the land has been made. The spies' information may be useful for determining strategy ("how will we?") and maybe for reassuring the people. But we know what happened. Ten of the spies report the expected positives first (typical manipulative rhetorical technique) but then add their own deadly spin: The lad devours its inhabitants. The people are giants and we were grasshoppers beside them (a vivid image of low self-esteem). Bottom line: We can't do it. Joshua and Caleb disagree vehemently but are drowned out and almost stoned. Then the people freak out and want to return to Egypt, the Lord wants to destroy them, Moses talks the Lord out of it, the Lord says OK, but the people are condemned to spend 40 years in the desert, one year per day of the spies' trip. A group tries to attack Canaan anyway, but it's too late; there's no divine support, so they are beaten back. The spies who spread the evil report die by plague (there's usually a plague). Then we get back to law-giving: more on sacrifices for when (not if) Israelites eventually capture the Promised Land, the penalty for violating the Sabbath (stoning), and the commandment to put fringes (tzitzit) on the corners of garments as a reminder of the Lord and the Law (sort of like a string around your finger).
In the haftarah, Joshua 2:1-24, Joshua, a veteran of the debacle just described, uses a more sensible strategy: only two spies on a very quiet mission, solely for military strategy purposes. So why did Moses send his spies the way he did? Moses is given permission by the Lord to send out spies (13:1-2), but Moses is going to make the final decision. Later on (Deut. 1:21-22), he claims this wasn't his idea, but a concession to the people's demand. Apparently, Moses had thought that, after a miracle-filled year in the wilderness, there was no way the people would back out. Instead, I guess he expected the report of the returning spies to be like a pep rally and fire up the people to move forward. Consequently, he sent out a group of well-known, well-respected leaders, with very concrete instructions, maybe with public fanfare. And the fruit they brought back was certainly impressive (that iconic image of two men carrying one cluster of grapes). But Moses underestimated the fragility of the people's faith: in the Lord, in Moses, and, critically, in themselves.
38+ years to go.
Shabbat shalom,
Parshas Shlach On 1 Foot
by S. Galena Posted: 07-09-2006
Moshe sends spies into Israel to scout out the land.
Spies: Land sucks.
God punishes the Jews with 40 years in the desert.
Moshe: We are taking the long route.
The End.
'Book Of CIA Humor' Declassifies Top-Secret Jokes
September 24, 2011
Excerpts from a "Weekend Edition" interview. Listen to the whole thing, 3 min 50 sec , at the website.
Copyright © 2011 NPR. For personal, noncommercial use only. See Terms of Use. For other uses, prior permission required.
SCOTT SIMON, Host: A man named Ed Mickolus joins us now. Two spies walk into a bar. One spy says to the other…
ED MICKOLUS: I'm sorry, Scott. You're not cleared for that punchline. (SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)
SIMON: Mr. Mickolus is a 33-year veteran of the CIA and a former stand-up comic. He's now written a new book called "The Secret Book of CIA Humor." Thanks so much for being with us
MICKOLUS: Hey, just delighted to be here.
SIMON: Is that a smile face on your CIA I.D.?
MICKOLUS: Well, oddly enough it is a Family Day badge that we have. So…
SIMON: Is that like bring your children…
MICKOLUS: Bring Your Kids to Work Day, right. Last year one of my friends came in with his eight-year-old son and seven-year-old daughter. And he was asked by his son, Jeez, this is so cool, dad. Did you actually use any of this stuff? And he comes up with the standard line, Well, son, if I told you I'd have to kill you.
SIMON: Oh.
MICKOLUS: The son says, tell my sister. (SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)
SIMON: Now, do I have this right? You actually started a comedy club in the CIA?
MICKOLUS: I did. I wanted to try out some of the material that I was using for regular comedy clubs in the D.C. And eventually I learned that, you know, this is a lot tougher than it looks when the professionals are doing it. [Comment sent in by Marty of Boise: "Spying is easy. Comedy is hard."] So, did it for a little while then decided, eh, let's keep the day job.
SIMON: Tell us one of your favorites, if you could.
MICKOLUS: Why did the case officer cross the road? To make sure that surveillance was going to follow him. (SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)
SIMON: You guys think that's really funny?
MICKOLUS: You know, that just kills in training. (SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)
SIMON: No, don't judge it by my reaction alone. Like, wouldn't an alternative punchline be, you know, something like: I'm sorry we can't confirm or deny that the operative has crossed the road?
MICKOLUS: Let me write that down, if you don't mind. (SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER) I'll use that one instead. [Alternative punchline sent in by Mark Hill: "To go over to the other side!"]
SIMON: Mr. Mickolus, thanks very much.
Low self-esteem
A guy had been feeling down for so long that he finally decided to seek the aid of a psychiatrist. He went there, lay on the couch, spilled his guts then waited for the profound wisdom of the psychiatrist to make him feel better. The psychiatrist asked a few questions, took some notes then sat thinking in silence for a few minutes with a puzzled look on his face. Suddenly, he looked up with an expression of delight and said, "Um, I think your problem is low self-esteem. It is very common among losers."
From 2001
Q: What happens when a paranoid has low self-esteem?
A: He thinks that nobody important is out to get him.
From 2007
The spy
During a critical mission, a CIA agent was given the task of finding a spy named Epstein in New York and giving him a secret code that only he would understand.
The agent entered the lobby of an apartment building on the Lower East Side of Manhattan and browsed the directory. He noticed there were two Epsteins listed; one on the first floor, the other on the second.
He took a chance and knocked on the door of the Epstein on the first floor. When Epstein opened the door, the agent told him, "The sky above, the mud below."
Mr. Epstein replied, "Oh! You want Epstein the spy. Second floor."
Besides the tzitzit on a tallit, highly observant male Jews wear a four-cornered garment with tzitzit daily (tallit katan, "little tallit" or Arba Kanfot, "four corners") under their clothes. Last year, I included a picture of such a garment that belonged to my great-great-grandfather and was donated by my mother to what is now the National Museum of American Jewish History; villagers thought it had special powers (healing the sick, etc.). See it at https://igplotzk.wordpress.com/2012/06/14/shelakh-lecha-numbers-131-1541-3/
Below is a pretty, embroidered one currently on the museum's website:
Tallit katan of Samuel Stein
Russia or Poland ca. 1888
Embroidered cloth
National Museum of American Jewish History, 1992.11.1


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Joan Rivers Net Worth
- TheRichest
- Richest Comedians
Source of Wealth:Film, Television
Birth Place:Brooklyn, New York, USA
Marital Status:Divorced (Edgar Rosenberg)
Full Name:Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Date of Birth:June 8, 1933
Occupation:Comedian, Actress, Writer, Producer, Director, TV Personality
Education:Connecticut College, Barnard College
Children:1 (Melissa Rivers)
About Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Joan Alexandra Molinsky, better known by her professional name Joan Rivers has an estimated net worth of $150 million. Rivers is an American television personality, comedian, writer, film director, and actress. As a young adult she studied anthropology at Connecticut College and held down low paying jobs from working as a tour guide instructor and sales consultant for a department store.
Rivers is known for funny and highly controversial humor. From the start her first role was daring, as she played the role of a lesbian lover to Barbara Streisand, in a a short-run play, Driftwood. Later in the 60's she focused on stand-up comedy. Her first television appearance was on the Tonight Show hosted by Jack Paar. Before long, she was hosting the show along with Saturday Night Live and the Ed Sullivan Show. She has since gone on to own and host her own television talk shows.
Rivers has written several books, and acted in several movies and television shows, she is currently starring in her online talk show In Bed with Joan.
The below financial data is gathered and compiled by TheRichest analysts team to give you a better understanding of Joan Rivers Net Worth by breaking down the most relevant financial events such as yearly salaries, contracts, earn outs, endorsements, stock ownership and much more.


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PWL-Series Open Tank Dissolved Air Flotation System (DAF Wastewater Systems)
Dissolved air flotation (DAF) is a proven and effective physical/chemical technology to treat industrial and municipal wastewater streams. A dissolved air flotation system is used to effectively remove suspended solids such as TSS, FOG, BOD, COD and other pollutants from wastewater. Conceptually, the DAF wastewater process is simple – tiny bubbles attach to solid contaminants causing them to float and then sludge is skimmed off the surface of the water! DAFs are commonly used to treat wastewater in a variety of industries including Food & Beverage Processing, General Manufacturing, Oil & Gas and many more!
JWC Environmental's FRC PWL Open Tank Dissolved Air Flotation system is optimized for treating wastewater heavily loaded with solids that require significant amounts of free surface area for flotation and separation. The PWL is an open tank with low-built separators, meaning the tanks are only built as high as 8 to 10 ½ feet tall. PWL units are rectangular in shape and built wider and longer as the free separation area requirement increases.
Open Flotation Cell & Counter-Current Skimmer
In the FRC PWL DAF systems, wastewater is introduced into the DAF tank and processed in a flow-through manner – wastewater comes in one side and goes out the other. While many DAF wastewater system designs push sludge across the entire length of the tank in the same direction as the wastewater flow, JWC Environmental's PWL design uses a skimmer assembly that rotates against the the hydraulic flow of the water. This DAF wastewater design shortens sludge skimming distance and eliminates solids carry-over.
Sludge Dewatering Grid
The PWL Dissolved Air Flotation system employs the sludge Dewatering Grid, a rectangular array of steel plates that hold sludge in place as it thickens and self-dewaters. After reaching a level set by the operator, sludge is then skimmed for removal. The Dewatering Grid helps operators control sludge thickness, eliminates pre-mature removal of solids, reduces build-up and/or re-entrainment of sludge and generates drier sludge.
ANSI Recycle Pumps
Most DAF wastewater system manufacturers use specialty pumps to generate their whitewater. These pumps either draw atmospheric air or receive an inlet feed of compressed air into a chamber where multi-stage impellers or a regenerative turbine shears the air to form micro bubbles. While these pumps can generate decent whitewater, they are prone to corrosion, pitting, and poor performance in anything other than optimal operating conditions.
JWC takes an engineered approach with its FRC DAF aeration system. Our ANSI recirculation pumps are used for just that – recirculating water. They're readily available from any pump vendor, have high tolerance for solids, can be made of high hardness materials, and are less expensive to own and operate compared to specialty whitewater pumps.
DAF Rental
The JWC team knows that things happen in wastewater – sometimes without warning. Fortunately we are ready to support you with a plan. For your industrial wastewater needs we can provide DAF rental systems for to help bridge maintenance periods, emergencies or plant expansions. We have a fleet of FRC dissolved gas flotation, dissolved air flotation rental systems as well as belt filter presses that are ready to be deployed to your site. Learn more about DAF rentals here.
- Efficiently removes suspended solids and other pollutants from wastewater
- Eliminates pre-mature removal of solids
- Operator able to control sludge thickness
- Reduces sludge build up
- Generates drier sludge
- Flow Rates range from 20 to 1,020 gpm
- Free Surface Area ranges from 14 to 510 sq. ft.
- Tank Height ranges from 8 to 10.5 feet


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Yesterday we made our way from Glacier Bay to an enchanted little town called Elfin Bay. Elfin Bay can only be reached by sea plane or boat. There are no roads or cars in E.B. and all the "roads" are boardwalks winding through the woods and from islet to islet. The boardwalks in fact were paid for at least in part by Alaska highway funds. The houses and out building's placement is dictated by the natural topography built up over and around tree's, huge roots, boulders and bits of beach.
The year round population ranges from 9 to 22 depending on who you talk to. In summer the place fills with summer home owners, guests at the handful of fishing lodges and cruising boaters like us.
After a walk around town we had a quick lunch at Coho's Bar and Grill where we met the chef at one of the lodges. His name is Collin and he lives in Mount Lake Terrace. There is only one restaurant in E.B but Collin extended an invitation to the lodge for dinner as their latest charter group had left that morning and so he had room for dinner. Afterwards Bill and I were tucking in for a deserved nap when we heard a boat coming in. Looking out the window we recognised Ponderosa from E dock at Shilshole. We have been doggedly trying to catch up with Ponderosa and Panta Rei (F dock friends) since we left home 10days after their two boats departed. Both boats are also headed south to Mexico and on to the South Pacific as are we (Sherry and Bob on Ponderosa and Karen and Larry on Panta Rhei.)
We had a walk through the towns boardwalk with all of them and met an interesting local who regaled us with a one hour+ at times hysterical near monologue/tour of the town. Then thinking fast we tracked down Collin and asked if he had room for 6 instead of 2 for dinner! He happily he opened the doors wider coming up on the fly with a wonderful meal of fresh seafood chowder, a choice of Rib Eye or King Salmon, string beans with blue cheese and red onion, fresh shrimp rice pilaf and warm rolls. We were all in heaven catching up on our travels and travails in the warm dinning room of the big lodge-complete with a stunning view of the cove and the mouth of South Inian Strait. Hopefully the first of many meals together in the miles and months to come.
We knew Karen and Larry pretty well before from F dock but it was really our first chance to sit down with Sherry and Bob. Plus Panta Rhei and Ponderosa have taken an opposite path through Southeast so everyone was able to offer up tidbits on where they had been for those still on their way there. Navigational tips and where the best laundry is and other important cruisers trivia are always priceless commodities.
This morning we crept away from the dock while they were still sleeping (we needed to catch a tide) poked our nose out into the Gulf of Alaska for the first time and headed to Pelican. Pelican is a tiny town trying desperately not to die. Like many cannery towns of BC and Southeast the loss of the main employer has had a huge impact on Pelican. We have visited several of the coastal ghost towns as we moved north.
In Pelican when the fish processing plant closed it left a three distinct groups of people: 1)the locals who are devastated by unemployment, alcoholism and a struggle to build a new economic base, 2) the local natives who are devastated by the loss of employment, the loss of their historical fishery and rampant alcoholism and 3) the new locals with money enough to build their dream home and retire in the beauty of the place. As we walked through town pasted on the front screen door of a native home was a bumper sticker that read "I would rather my daughter be a whore than my son be a fishing guide." The as we walked the boardwalk through town we came upon a couple fighting loudly in the street. The interesting thing was not that they were arguing loudly in the middle of the day in the middle of the boardwalk in the middle of town about things "illegal" and one having "saved the other from a certain prison stay" or the expletive filled references to each others heritage, education and lack of reasoning and intention but, that they referered to each other as A)being a sorry excuse for a mayor and B) not any better for someone who is superintendent of schools." Welcome to Pelican!
Not to make light of it. The town is struggling and in a place where everyone lives along a 3/4 mile boardwalk who's front doors open facing each other in a town with only a post office, a marina, a cafe open till 3pm one fishing lodge/bar/restaurant and one roadhouse bar I suspect personalities rub regularly. We payed our morage at City Hall, were warmly welcomed at the diner and nearly everyone says hi and waves as we passed by.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
6/15 Elfin Cove. AKA Shilshole North.
Posted by Bill and Kat Russell at 1:12 AM
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After decades of dieting, I've discovered the REAL Secret to Weight Loss for everyone…find out what it is!
As someone who has "dieted" basically my entire life, my views and opinions on food have dramatically swung like a pendulum over the years. As a kid, there were no "diet" or "light" products. The food was what it was. Butter was butter, mayo was mayo and the only way to decrease your caloric intake was to decrease portions. Period. There was a total of 3 products I can think of on the market that targeted people looking to decrease calories. Tab (ewwwww), Carvel Thinny-Thin ice cream (who remembers the pistachio flavor?) and oil free (not labeled as fat-free) Italian salad dressing which my grandmother used due to her gallstones. If anyone remembers others, please share in the nostalgia.
Then came the late 80's-early 90's which I called the "Entenmann's or Snackwells era", basically because fat-free cake became diet food. Let's be real, did anyone actually think it tasted good? And soft serve frozen yogurt became an acceptable meal choice. My uncle owned a frozen yogurt store and I happily worked there serving the line out the door at lunch where folks ordered a large 16 fluid ounce yogurt with 2 toppings as their whole lunch for $2.50. Sigh. And we wonder why everyone started to gain weight.
We didn't know what we didn't know at the time. As I trained to become an RD, I was taught that any fat for a breast cancer patient was ill-advised but sugar was fine. We counseled patients with heart disease to minimize eggs, nuts and shrimp but sugar was deemed harmless. We know better 20+ years later but this all comes down to finding a balance and what works for your own body.
At this point in my career after counseling people for over 20 years, I've distilled The REAL Secret to Weight Loss down to WANTS vs. NEEDS. Similar to budgeting for your home, there are things you NEED like clothes and shelter and things you WANT like vacations, video game systems, dinners out and trips to the movies. You may WANT French fries or cake but your body NEEDS fruits, veggies, nuts, beans, seeds, whole grains and lean proteins. The tricky part is truly identifying where the WANTS and NEEDS cross over to find the right plan for you. It's especially tricky when dining out. Having an enormous menu of tempting dishes to choose from requires willpower, but does it? If you train yourself to look for what your body NEEDS and out of those options, pick one you WANT, your health wins.
The REAL Secret to #WeightLoss: WANTS vs. NEEDS http://wp.me/p4LsrV-Kb Click To Tweet
I have found that so much time is spent worrying about what we CAN'T have, that people lose focus on the much more important issue of what we NEED. Sugar-free, fat-free, gluten-free, dairy-free and grain-free are all irrelevant if they are not foods you need for nourishment. Sometimes these things overlap. There can be nourishing foods that have these attributes, but in spite of them, not because of them.
For goodness sake, from a lifetime dieter, please don't consider going on a diet if you need to lose weight, lower cholesterol, blood pressure or blood sugar. Think about the foods you NEED, out of those, identify the ones you WANT and you've found the winning strategy for healthy living.
Make sense? Please share your thoughts in the comments below:


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Ohio State Report Evaluates Options for Reducing Lake Erie's Harmful Algal Blooms
lake by 40%. Now, researchers have a better understanding of what management practices need to be ... lake comes from agricultural sources such as fertilizer runoff. To address this, researchers are ... the weather, researchers use watershed models to project how different management techniques impact ...
Science Saturday- Can You Dig it?
Joins as we "rock on" with our friends from OSU's Orton Geological Museum. ...
Greenhouse Management Workshop
GREENHOUSE MANAGEMENT WORKSHOP GREENHOUSE MANAGEMENT WORKSHOP Sustainable and Safe Crop ...
Meet Morgan Dent: Humanitarian Engineer
a focus in soil & water. Morgan currently works with the USDA as a research assistant under Kevin ... King, in their water chemistry lab. She researches edge-of-field agriculture runoff. Studying abroad ... researching the different opportunities, Ohio State offers, she chose to go on the engineering service trip to ...
Growing Hemp in Ohio
Department of Agriculture Hemp Cultivation Practices Soil Nutrition Fundamentals Steve Culman, Ohio State ... Control Invited OSU Research Update Harold Keener and James Morris, Ohio State University The Buisness of ...
Faces of Ohio 4-H
Foundation Manager and Emily Niemann, Program Assistant. Growing Up with 4-H: Crystal Ott To Make the ... speak in front of groups and even did some radio spots for the Licking County Extension office! All ... University in Extension Education, with a specialization in leadership. As the Ohio 4-H Foundation manager ...
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4-H Health Heroes Educate About Teen Vaping
hope our presentation gave adults better insight as to how to address teens about this issue," said ...
New State 4-H Leader Named
across the state. I am excited to continue our collective efforts to build on our strong 4-H foundation ... associate state 4-H leader, providing leadership in the areas of risk management, coaching professionals ...
Metroparks Toledo Recognized as Friend of OSU Extension Master Gardener Volunteer Program
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Event box
Peaceful Holiday Shopping
Parents may drop off children ages 5-10 for the evening of Friday, December 7th from 5-8:00 PM. Kids will play games, have snacks, watch a Christmas movie, and make holiday crafts with Girl Scout Troop 60709 and library staff. Space is limited; children must be registered online in advance, and parents must leave their contact information with the library.
- Date:
- Friday, December 7, 2018
- Time:
- 5:00pm - 8:00pm
- Location:
- Rush - Library Meeting Room
- Campus:
- Rush Public Library
- Audience:
- Children/Kids
- Categories:
- Rush Family Event
Registration has closed.


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Most teams and riders will be on hand for this working day at the track. You WILL meet them, as our private tour takes you to the track as a guest of a MotoGP team. You will have FULL paddock access, be given a tour of the pit and can watch the proceedings from there. You will have access to team hospitality, including drinks and light snacks, and eat lunch with the team. We will engage a special guest (usually technical guru Neil Spalding) who will give us insights on what is happening at the test and the MotoGP world in general. The tour includes our private expert guide on hand, and transport to and from the circuit and our package hotels (you must pre-book to take advantage of the transport). We always end up back at one of our favourite locals for a wind-down pint or two... Bring your autograph pen! Discounted for package customers.
Transfer to/from hotel, MotoGP paddock access, MotoGP pit tours, lunch with Team, private guide, guest speaker
Admit 1 person
EUR 30 for children


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Dear Rip,
When I think of you, I think of fried chicken...and sweet tea...and Grey's Anatomy. While we existed in our little cocoon of hospital life for the most part it was just you and me, Bubba. And while that time was certainly stressful, it was also very sweet. And maybe a little unhealthy. But you were safe in my belly, Meredith Grey provided an escape from our worries and quite frankly that hospital could give the Colonel a run for his money in the chicken and tea department.
It was a little shocking then, once you were on the outside and I watched them wheel you away. Something that had literally been a part of me for all of those weeks now seemed a little bit...other. That feeling of otherness immediately washed away the minute I held you in my arms. You were once again so totally mine and a feeling came over me, as I've described before, as simply "Heaven".
When you had to leave me again, I fought so hard against the "otherness". It was the hardest thing I've ever been through, not to have you here with me. But somehow, over the seven years (seven!!!) little boy, you are with me again. There is not one thing- not one- that I do you are not a part of. Not a decision I make as a mother, as a wife, as a person who tries to leave the world a better place. That is all because I carry you inside of me. Just as I did all of those months and weeks seven years ago.
Over time I've come to realize - I will always, always carry you Rip Harris. No matter where you are.
Happy Birthday- I hope there is plenty of fried chicken and sweet tea (you are still too young for Grey's Anatomy).


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Hinsdale – Adventist
Hinsdale Hospital's
20th annual Still Missed memorial service will take place at 7:30
p.m. Oct. 28 at Hinsdale United Methodist
Church, 945 S. Garfield Ave., Hinsdale.
Organized by the hospital's Still Missed support program, the event commemorates
the lives of babies who died through miscarriage, stillbirth or shortly after
birth. To reserve a spot, call (630) 856-4497. More than 150 community members
are expected to attend.
A bell choir will perform and banners will be on
display featuring the names of babies who died before their time. Families are
encouraged to share a personal story or poem and all participants will receive
a keepsake photo frame and white rose. A children's activity also is planned.
"Since its inception in 1988, the Still Missed
memorial service has really grown and has become an important healing event for
so many families dealing with the loss of an infant or child," said Rosmarie
Roose, R.N., coordinator of the Still Missed program.
The program has several support
groups that meet on a regular basis. The Still Missed Parent Support Group
meets from 7:30 to 9 p.m. on the second Monday of each month at Tupper Hall, 119 N. Oak St.,
directly across from the hospital. It is designed to help parents cope with the
grief associated with losing a baby. The Still Missed Spanish-speaking Parent
Support Group meets quarterly at Tupper Hall. The next meeting is 7:30 to 9
p.m. Nov. 10. The Subsequent Pregnancy Support Group meets from 7:30 to 9 p.m.
on the third Monday of the month at Tupper Hall. For more information, contact
(630) 856-4497 or email@example.com.


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Where Our Treasure Is
Where Our Treasure Is Detailed overview of issues relating to gold mining in Guatemala and the United Church Pension investment. Prepared by the Mining the Connections Working Group of the Church in Action Committee of Maritime Conference.
Grad Project: Passing the Peace – Social Gesture or Sacred Act?
Grad Project: Passing the Peace – Social Gesture or Sacred Act? By Kym Burke-Cole
Experiencing Jesus – Adult Curriculum
EXPERIENCING JESUS – Adult Curriculum A 10 Session Program for Groups An experiential study to accompany Marcus Borg's most recent book, Jesus: Uncovering the Life, Teachings and Relevance of a Religious Revolutionary , in which he leads the reader on a journey to discover who Jesus was, what he taught, and why he still matters today. As participants in the study give themselves to the ten sessions they will experience the masterful way that Borg uncovers a Jesus they may never have known before: a religious revolutionary, a Jewish mystic totally centered in the reality of God, and...
Experiencing the Bible Again for the First Time: Adult Curriculum
EXPERIENCING THE BIBLE AGAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME Experience! Faith Formation Curriculum for Adults; 10 Group Sessions. Leader's Guide included Christianity is a faith of the Word, so biblical familiarity is vitally important to the formation of mature faith. Matters of biblical interpretation and relevance remain one of the most divisive and confused issues among Christians today. Experiencing the Bible Again for the First Time is an open invitation to deepen your relationship with the Bible – a journey that never...
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Committee Mandate


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Forget about animated characters, Mike Myers is again in his first unique position due to the fact Austin Powers and he doesn't disappoint. The love Guru is a thinly veiled homage to Deepak Chopra, focusing at the travails of 1 guru who has to break a curse, reunite a pair and get a hockey group to the Stanley Cup. That's no small order, but you may anticipate hilarious hi-jinks to occur.
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Acknowledged for his unorthodox techniques, Pitka is employed on through the owner of the Toronto Maple Leafs, Jane Bullard (Alba). The group has been a sufferer of the Bullard Curse for 40 years and it appears as although it has struck again in the form of disharmony within the marriage among Malco and his estranged spouse. Timberlake is perfection in his function because the golden boy of the la Kings who woos away said spouse.
Given Myers love of Chopra and hockey, this is surely a challenge made in heaven for the 45 year vintage superstar. Acknowledged for blending existence and art, Myers hits his stride on this movie, after disappointing audiences in his flip because the Cat and the Hat. He is virtually in his element on this zany comedy that capabilities a number of today's most up to date rising stars. It's a clever career circulate for Myers and one that audiences will surely embrace, so long as he keeps himself in check.
The affection Guru is ready to surest on June 20th in the america. Anticipate a massive roll out and a whole lot of insurance as Hollywood makes book on whether or not Myers can convey within the audiences. Given the recognition of the Shrek movies and Myers in widespread, maximum movie goers need to be able to forgive Myers for his few missteps and carefully enjoy this a laugh and lighthearted comedy.
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The EFA Fashion Apprenticeship program was launched two weeks ago to find two people to join and shadow two models within the agency as a means experiencing the day-to-day running of a dynamic and growing fashion agency from within. The deadline for submissions is now over. Winners will be announced next week on the 11th of December at the EFA Christmas party.
We have been overwhelmed by a show of interest and we'd like to say a special thanks to all those who entered. You will be contacted shortly.