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The History of Spirit of the West
In 1983 Geoffrey Kelly, John Mann and J.Knutson began a group they called "Evesdropper". The trio played neighbourhood pubs for very small amounts of money. Oft-times they'd be shunted-off into a corner to suffer and sweat through a miserable set. Oddly, they seemed to like it. It was certainly more fun than actually working, even if most of the audience mistakenly thought they were called "Eavesdroppings". Armed only with a love of music and a fear of real work the three recorded their first album the next year. Fifteen years later the group which had wisely changed its name to Spirit of the West continues to make records and earn far too little money. There have been some personnel changes through the years, but Mann and Kelly have been there from the start. You can't fire the bosses, you know. Knutson departed after the second album, "Tripping Up the Stairs", and was replaced by Hugh McMillan, multi-instrumentalist and astral traveller. The band made trips, no doubt to Hugh's dismay, in a huge blue Ford van named "Gerald", slowing his customary pace considerably. Hugh took a sabbatical after a particularly lengthy and grinding tour of the UK in support of "Labour Day", and was replaced by Daniel Lapp and Linda McRae. Lapp buggered-off months later -- but McRae stayed on. Happily for all Hugh McMillan returned to fill the void left by Lapp. The line-up of Kelly, Mann, McMillan and McRae plied the roads in support of "Save This House", their first major label release in 1989, touring Canada and the UK. In the UK they played and made friends with "The Wonder Stuff", who were at that time riding high and playing large, packed venues. It was then that the band realised that a four-piece folk group would have difficulty commanding audiences of the size that The Wonderstuff seemed to master easily. They needed more power, and sought out a drummer to supply it. They found Vince Ditrich, who, although a musician in Vancouver for years, was new to the Folk-connected music scene. Now he joined forces with a bunch who were activists & vegetarians. They didn't even use Styrofoam cups. Nevertheless the marriage of opposites has worked, no matter what the folk purists may have feared. The 1991 recording of "Go Figure" followed soon afterward, under the curmudgeonly custodianship of Los Angeles producer Joe Chiccarelli. With Kelly now often on acoustic guitar, Mann switching occasionally to electric, Ditrich on full drum kit, and McMillan experimenting with several new instruments (not to mention his invention of the peanut butter and rutabaga sandwich), there was much growth. There were a few growing pains too, some magnified by conflicts with Chiccarelli. This was the first step in new stylistic direction -- one which would allow for much more growth than strictly traditional folk. Nevertheless a few of the fans of the group's early days were seen, aghast at the drum kit and electric guitar, fleeing the concert halls with hands over their ears. Intensive touring followed, covering the UK, Germany, USA, and of course Canada -- from Victoria to St. John's. The live show developed considerably, becoming more personal & confident. Beer from all nations was sampled. Favourites were chosen. The first tour of Germany was an eye-opener. Audiences there act differently; they are often more composed and attentive than at home. Most speak English as well as North Americans, and if necessary can explain with frightening clarity just what they do not enjoy about a show. But the reception was very good, the hospitality was exemplary, the accommodations meticulous, the Autobahn terrifying {as, to the vegetarians, occasionally was the food}. Britain was on the schedule too, one highlight being a guest slot at a sold-out Wonderstuff show at Walsall Stadium, near Birmingham. Standing before more than 20,000 raucous fans, Spirits broke about 10 guitar strings in 20 minutes and managed to be dubbed "Fat Bastards". As the crowd chanted, Vince Ditrich looked down at his beer-gut, sure the comment was meant for him alone. Unable to make-out what they were chanting, Geoffrey Kelly was baffled as to why the audience would be so bellicose over a condiment. Squinting out at them he queried,"What's all this about mustard?". Fat bastards or not, SOTW plowed ahead, tweaking and performing not only current material, but songs as yet unrecorded. Having learned invaluable lessons both musically and personally from the recording of "Go Figure", the band approached the next album with a steadier gaze. They studied the field of prospective producers carefully and selected Michael Phillip Wojewoda, based not only on the good work he had done with the Rheostatics and the Doughboys, but also his impeccable reputation. His skill and intuition were ideally matched to Spirit of the West. "Faithlift" was a strong showing and a big seller, lifting the band to platinum sales status. With "...And If Venice is Sinking", "Sadness Grows", and the other singles from Faithlift, Spirit of the West could finally claim to have radio hits, albeit minor ones. Video was most helpful in adding to the band's profile through the success of "Venice" and "5 Free Minutes", which were huge improvements over some startlingly poor efforts from earlier albums. One such early video attempt featured scenes such as a planting-bee in Hugh McMillan's garden, simply because they were at a loss for any better ideas. This shaky concept was at times inter-cut with shots of the producer, clad in a ludicrous Brian Mulroney mask and hip waders, standing in a slough. Once again intensive and exhaustive touring took place in Canada, the UK, Europe, and America throughout '93 & '94. The next album was "Two Headed", which began in late March, 1995 with the aid of Ken "Soapy Sales" Marshall. Recorded at Mushroom Studios in Vancouver, this recording was under a strict time deadline, for within days of its completion SOTW were scheduled to record a live album with the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra. No time to waste, the band made a record that sounded darker, richer, and more serious. To compliment this more mature sound SOTW asked director Morris Panych and art director Ken McDonald to take the reigns for the album's first video, "Tell Me What I Think". Using imaginative costumes, sets, and make-up, the band gave a unique and ground breaking performance. Unlike almost every other music video in existence, the camera was locked-in place, unmoving; the entire production was choreographed to take place on one pristine, uncut and unedited piece of film. Unhappily, as it turned out, it became evident that the video networks still longed for shots of masked effigies standing knee-deep in stagnant water. Right on the heels of the completion of "Two Headed" Spirit of the West went into rehearsal for "Open Heart Symphony" -- what had started as two concerts with the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra had now mushroomed into a live album plus a television special. This was, as the reader might imagine, a large bite to take for even the most seasoned and confident band. With songs from the same huge batch which also gave life to "Two Headed" complimented by the excellent orchestral arrangements of George Blondheim, the band was eager to take-on this new and challenging task. At first a little unsure, by the end of the first rehearsal SOTW could be seen grinning like horses eating thistle. The shows were a rousing success and a high-water mark for the members of SOTW personally {Geoffrey Kelly actually donned a suit -- with long pants}. To the relief of the band the two evening's performances supplied them with sufficient "takes" to complete the album. There was never any guarantee that this would be the case, and the worry all along was that there would be mistakes or equipment failures which would render the recording, or at least important parts of it, useless. In mid-May of 1995, after an intense five months of work on two albums, the band turned its attention to touring. A stint on "Another Roadside Attraction" was the highlight of the summer. Confronted with ridiculous weather conditions and slathered in mud, SOTW played alongside Blues Traveler, Ziggy Marley, The Rheostatics, and of course the Hip. Playing to audiences as large as 50,000 people, this was a major event, mud or not. Mysteriously The Tragically Hip were never once rained upon. Hmmmmmm. The touring cycle for "Two Headed" finally over, SOTW then turned their attention back to "Open Heart Symphony", which was released in May 1996, one year after it had been recorded. SOTW appeared with orchestras the likes of the Edmonton Symphony, The Calgary Philharmonic, The Winnipeg Symphony, The Kitchener/Waterloo Symphony, the Boris Brot Orchestra, & Toronto's Lennie Solomon Waterfront Orchestra and Doughnut Kiosk, Co. Ltd. Inc. George Blondheim served as Maestro, but it must now be revealed he was instigator of the scandalous behaviour of beer drinking on stage, as well as coercion of the orchestra to do the same. Spirits, shy and retiring, only partook of this dreadful activity under his direct orders. With the whirlwind of 1995-6 coming to an end, Spirits reached a crossroads. Long time manager Janet Forsyth stepped down and retired from the music business, and Spirit Linda McRae left in-order to rekindle her solo career after an eight-year hiatus. New managers Chip Sutherland and Mickey Quase were now on-board, conveniently located only 3500 miles away in Halifax. The group pared down to 4 members, filling the 5th chair with a special guest, Tobin Frank, who was hired in-part for his effusive manner and non-stop jokes. Plans to record somewhere other than Vancouver had long lain dormant, but an opportunity finally arose in spring 1997. After a good deal of leg-work and juggling SOTW made their way to "The Presshouse", a residential studio owned by Jethro Tull's Martin Barre, located in Devon, England. Anglophiles all, the band had a most memorable experience in the quiet English countryside, recording "Weights & Measures". Guests included Martin Bell, formerly of the Wonderstuff; Duncan Moss, (who actually plays with a band called "Shave the Monkey", but everyone makes mention of the fact that he once appeared with "Page & Plant" on the telly; Karen Matheson & Donald Shaw of Glasgow's "Capercaillie"; and Ric Sanders of "Fairport Convention". Martin Barre played as well, sending the whole band into paroxysms of glee. His wife Julie Barre cooked for the band which also sent them into paroxysms of glee. When done for the day they'd go down to the Kingfisher Pub for a pint....More glee over that. Sometimes they'd hit both the 'Fisher and the nearby Gerrard, both located in the charming village of Colyton, thereby doubling the glee. Once they hit both pubs and got a ride back, too. This of course, tripled the glee. Overall, the project seems to have evoked an unusually high degree of glee. 1998 has SOTW planning Canadian tours and preparing for a release of "Weight & Measures" in the UK (on Coalition Records), which will also be supported by a tour. In addition they intend, apparently, to pester the administration of the Cropredy Festival (UK) incessantly until such time as they are invited to attend. Last Updated: 1/98 (from SOTW website)


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FDOT Emergency Travel Alert: For information on the current situation,
please visit the following page - Alerts.
Construction on the Starke Railroad Overpass Interchange Improvements project began in the summer of 2020. J.B. Coxwell Contracting, Inc. of Jacksonville, was selected to complete this project.
Currently, the City of Starke is divided by the CSX railroad that runs parallel to U.S. 301. With 29 trains traveling through the city each day, emergency vehicles and other traffic experience frequent delays, and train traffic is expected to increase in the future. The overpass will ease congestion and improve emergency response times and allow traffic to flow more freely.
The project will include a bridge beginning east of U.S. 301 at Walnut Street and ending east of Church Street. One-way frontage roads will be constructed to allow local traffic to access Cherry, Church, Thompson, and Walnut Streets. The project also includes resurfacing of multiple streets and additional parking.
Additionally, follow FDOT District Two on Twitter at @MyFDOT_NEFL and MyFDOTNEFL on Facebook for updates.
Daytime and nighttime lane closures Monday through Sunday between East South Street and Laura Street for intersection construction.
Intermittent daytime lane closures from 7 a.m. to 5 p.m. weekdays between U.S. 301 and St. Clair Street for equipment movement in and out of the work zone.
Daytime lane closures on the Eastbound Frontage Road from 7 a.m. to 5 p.m. weekdays in the vicinity of South Walnut Street for bridge painting. Follow detours.
The Florida Department of Transportation (FDOT) will host an open house to provide citizens with an update on the Starke Railroad Overpass Interchange Improvements project.
The hybrid open house will be held Tuesday, Oct. 11 at the Governor Charley E. Johns Conference Center, 1610 N. Temple Avenue, Starke, FL 32091. Project staff will be available to answer questions in-person, online or by phone at (631) 992-3221, access code 213-631-455. Citizens may drop by anytime between 5 and 6:30 p.m. to ask questions about the project and view renderings.
Public participation is solicited without regard to race, color, religion, gender, age, national origin, disability or familial status.
Event info:
Webinar ID: 643-426-395
© 1996-
Florida Department of Transportation


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Brij Kothari, PlanetRead: Same Language Subtitling on TV, for Mass Literacy in India
Monday August 08, 2011,
7 min Read
We at YourStory.in recently caught up with Brij Kothari, Founder of PlanetRead, that enables Same Language Subtitling(SLS) to facilitate mass literacy in India. SLS is already delivering regular and inescapable reading practice to over 200 million weak-readers in India! In a conversation with YourStory.in, Brij tells us more about his journey as a social entrepreneur.Brij is one of the winners of NASSCOM Social Innovation Honours(NSIH) in 2011. To know more about NSIH, click here. To apply for the NASSCOM Social Innovation Honours 2012, click here.
Tell us about PlanetRead. What led you to starting up PlanetRead?
It all goes back to 1996, when I was a student at Cornell University. To improve my Spanish, I used to watch Spanish films with friends. These films all came with English subtitles. On one of those occasions I casually commented that if only Spanish films were shown with Spanish subtitles, it would help us learn the language faster. And then I added in jest that if they simply added Hindi subtitles to Bollywood songs, India would become literate. That thought gave birth to the concept we now call, "Same Language Subtitling," or "SLS". SLS is simply the idea of subtitling audio-visual content in the 'same' language as the audio. After several years of research on SLS at IIM Ahmedabad, we found that mere exposure to SLS causes automatic and inescapable reading practice among viewers. SLS not only has the power to transition the masses of early-readers to functional literacy, it is also very popular among the viewers. PlanetRead was founded in 2004 as a non-profit to give the SLS innovation an additional organizational base to champion SLS from. Besides implementing SLS on 10 weekly TV programmes on Doordarshan, in as many languages, we conduct impact research on SLS in collaboration with IIM A, we are pushing it in national policy, getting private channels to join the effort in India and, more recently, other countries as well!
How long have you been operational? Where are you based? What is the size of your team?
PlanetRead was started in 1996. We are based in Mumbai, Ahmedabad and Pondicherry. Currently, we are about 20 people.
Brij, tell us about your background.
I grew up in the Sri Aurobindo Ashram in Pondicherry. I have a Masters in Physics from the Indian Institute of Technology, Kanpur. And, a Masters in Development Communication and a Ph.D. in Education from Cornell University. I am a Schwab Foundation Social Entrepreneur of the Year, 2009. The SLS project is delivering regular reading practice to over 200 million weak readers, in several Indian languages. I am also a faculty of the Indian Institute of Management, Ahmedabad and an Ashoka Fellow. I also started BookBox, a for-profit enterprise, as a Reuters Digital Vision and Microsoft Developing Country Fellow at Stanford University.
Share with us some of your past success stories.
The SLS innovation was featured by President Bill Clinton at the Clinton Global Initiative in 2009. It is the recipient of honours and awards from the Tech Museum of Innovation(San Jose), the Institute for Social Inventions(London), and Development Marketplace(World Bank). Supporters of SLS include Google Foundation, Sir Ratan Tata Trust, the Department of Education(Govt. of India), Mahindra Tractors, DELL Giving, and Doordarshan, India's public service broadcaster.
Tell us about partners that helped you scale up operations.
Sir Ratan Tata Trust, Development Marketplace(World Bank), Google Foundation and Dell Giving have, over the years, given us sizable grants to advance SLS operations, research and policy advocacy. Doordarshan has been an important partner allowing SLS on its song-based programmes. We have been holding steady at 10 weekly TV programmes for several years. However, real scale will only be achieved through policy acceptance of SLS. Our policy request is that SLS should be implemented on all songs in all languages, at least on Doordarshan, under its public service mandate. The fact that SLS also contributes to ratings, is a huge bonus for the broadcaster.
What are the challenges you faced while starting up PlanetRead?
SLS was rejected outright at first, by both, the broadcast and education departments, for the first 5 years. But on the basis of scientific evidence, we refuted 'expert objections' one by one, building a strong case for the innovation. The list of challenges is long. Our innovation straddles broadcast and education so the easiest thing for any side is to send us to the other. Officers who supported SLS were never in their positions long enough to see the innovation through. Institutional memory is weak in the Government so a fresh dialogue has to begin every time with a new person. Often officers could see SLS only as a small project, missing entirely the vision underlying it for India's literacy. A person in power can trump all the data one may have gathered, with a mere opinion!
Tell us about your reach currently.
SLS is at present giving reading practice for 30 minutes a week to 200 million weak readers.
How do you market SLS?
Bollywood songs are consumed with a passion all across India, in many languages. Our outreach model is perhaps laughably simple. Slide SLS into songs that people already watch. The singing along begins automatically. Reading becomes just a byproduct of entertainment.
Share with us your expansion plans.
We are trying to get Prasar Bharati to recommend SLS on all songs shown on Doordarshan, in every language. We are in dialogue with a private channel network in India to take up SLS. Interestingly, their independent analysis has found that SLS improves the ratings of songs. Internationally, we are exploring the possibility of SLS in Africa in collaboration with a global private network. I believe that we will not be the ones spreading SLS worldwide. The idea is powerful enough and will spread on its own, after it has a certain presence.
How do you measure impact of PlanetRead?
The basic model is simple. We take two groups that are comparable in most respects and create a baseline of their literacy skills. Then over a period, one group receives regular exposure to songs with SLS and the other does not. We re-measure their literacy skills and compare changes in skill levels across the two groups. This model works best in a controlled context. However, when we implement SLS on mainstream TV, those who say they watch our SLS programmes regularly are compared with those who say they don't.
How did recognition by NSIH help you?
An award is as good as its jury. The NSIH 2011 award's jury had a collection of stellar figures. So PlanetRead's attitude, going through the award process, was that even if we did not come up trumps, our prize would still be that several industry leaders would have at least taken a hard look at our work. Although, SLS has won several awards on the global stage, the social innovation honour from NASSCOM Foundation is the first honour we have received in India. By honouring us, NSIH brought our work to the attention of the corporate sector and the government in India. It is a vitally important first step in a nascent innovation ecosystem that far too often waits for affirmations from outside to tell us that there is something interesting in our backyard. Such honours have the potential to act as catalysts, shortening the path from idea to pilot to scale.
SLS services available in a variety of languages on the weekly TV programmes are listed at http://www.planetread.org/tv.php
Do share your thoughts on this story by writing to us at [email protected]


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06 Apr My Favourite Books of 2019
What is going on everyone? Seems like a precarious time for all of us, what with us waiting at a whim for a call by the government to do something, or to support us in this time. Questions abound on whether this is good that "Big Government" is more involved, and thus will potentially become more authoritarian, Or what about that Netflix documentary series Tiger King? What a crazy show that was, and before you ask, yes, Carole Baskin killed her husband, no doubt about it. I bet she was hoping to expose those big cat enthusiasts, but looks like she got the short end of that stick.
Anyway, with all that is going on, I figure it would be a good time to promote reading! I enjoy reading, and I used to read all the time as a kid. I took a huge chunk of time away from reading when I got into boxing though, and I only got back to reading regularly in the last couple years. I read many of Eric Wilson's books as a kid, with Cold Midnight In Vieux Quebec being my favourite (I still have my library copy from elementary tucked away.) I was a big fan of mystery books, and I got into Ian Rankin and his Inspector Reubus books sometime after, with The Black Book still being one of my favourites. And of course you can't forget Stephen King, the man that somehow finds a way to understand other peoples perspectives, even a little girls, like with his book The Girl who Loved Tom Gordon. I suppose now would be a good time to read The Shining, I just loved the movie and find it to be a masterclass of storytelling and psychological horror.
I made it a goal last year to read one book a week, which I heard some CEO was doing on the regular, plus I wanted to get away from reading studies and textbooks on biology and human anatomy. I was a bit drained and wanted something more. And so you know, I didn't end up reading a book a week, but I did manage to read somewhere between 20-30 books, which I was pretty proud of. I picked up books I missed out on reading in high school, I read a few short stories and essays from some notable authors, and I even got into poetry, so much so that I started writing poetry again. Reading again reminded me of a time where I was reading and writing all them. I love learning, and I always have questions about… well everything! It is why I feel happy about going back to school for a purely academic reason. But with all that being said, I want to share with you my Favourite Books of 2019.
10. Lila: An Inquiry Into Morals
Robert Pursig wrote this as a sequel to his widely successful book Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, which is considered the most successful philosophy book of all time. Robert Redford even wanted to make a movie about it, which he goes into in this semi-biographical novel. Lila follows the continued story of Phadrus, which is a name he coined for his past self in Zen, and his life after the success of his book. He travels around on a boat, recently divorced, and alone. But, he comes across a chance encounter with a women named Lila at a port town he visits. The thing about Pursig is that he doesn't deliver a pure narrative, he throws in discussion and philosophical inquiry throughout the book. He goes into anthropology, ethics, morality, conforming to societies ideals, western thought on culture, and what culture even is. He throws in some anecdotes from his time spent in University teaching philosophy, and learning from an anthropologist. But the major theme he goes into is values, and what they mean to some people, and if some people have greater significance then others. It is a heavy worded book, and some of the questions posed are definitely head scratchers, but I would recommend Lila for those that have an interest in philosophy. I also recommend you read Zen first, though not necessary. Robert Pursig challenged people to see if they can figure out what the meaning of the book is, with an actual prize for it, but he passed away a couple years ago, so we may never know. Except he started a great discussion, as all great artists and writers do.
9. Mother Night
I kept seeing a YouTube video on Kurt Vonnegut on my recommended feed, and the video was what his thoughts are on the types of stories that exist. I finally decided to watch it, and I found him hilarious, what with this old dude just talking and talking like a grandpa at a dinner table, telling funny stories, and making funny remarks. But the thing that stuck out for me was when he spoke of Shakespeare, and how he doesn't know right from wrong, but neither do we. He says that is what makes it a masterpiece. He then speaks of his Uncle Alex, and mentions how at times he says "If this isn't nice, I don't know what is" alluding to the fact that we sometimes don't know when we are happy. His own way of saying to practice gratitude, and to do so with writing. Hitting people over the head with "This is a good guy" or "That is the bad guy" is pretty simple, but doesn't provide much inquiry, and it is why I enjoyed Mother Night so much. Howard Campbell is a US spy living in Nazi Germany, who actually moved there when he was 11. Howard stays when his parents leave so he can become a playwright, and later a Nazi propagandist, though is indifferent despite his supposed allegiance. The story is about what our true self is, and the mask we put on can make us forget who we really are. It is the one novel Vonnegut says has a moral, with phrases like "We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be," and "Make love when you can, it's good for you." Pretty good book overall,
8. Sex at Dawn
Christopher Ryan and his partner Cacilda Jethá take on the idea of monogamy and whether it is something humans are meant to do. They look at agriculture as one of the points that lead us on this path of monogamy in our culture, and they also look at our cultural history and evolutionary ancestors, along with our more modern relatives like the bonobo. Some scholarly critics have said that Ryan and Jethá don't have enough evidence and research to make the claims that they do, but I find Sex at Dawn provides enough to make you wonder and ask questions that defy convention, like the institution of marriage, the influence of religion, and the control of people, namely women. Thought provoking, and with some personality to boot makes Sex at Dawn a fun read.
7. The Laughter of Strangers
I already talked about this book extensively on my blog, so you can read all about it here. I don't have much else to add, except Michael J. Seidlinger really tries to get into the mind of an aging boxer that is defined by his success in the ring. "Sugar" Wilhem Flores narrates this tale, and all he wants is to be remembered. The jarring paragraphs that split up his emotions and thoughts helps you see a little bit more about his mental state. However, the thoughts he has and the experiences he goes through aren't limited to boxers, and I think there is a a lot of relatable aspects in The Laughter of Strangers.
6. The Handmaid's Tale
The Handmaids Tale by Margaret Atwood was on my list of books to read for quite some time. I was nervous about reading it as I heard it was a little upsetting; but the truth, or rather, an outcome that can be a consequence of reducing rights should be shown to the world, so as to understand those consequences. For that reason, The Handmaids Tale is considered speculative fiction. In the not so distant future, an oppressive regime seizes control of the United States and creates the country of Gilead, which holds control over people and limits their rights and freedoms, namely to women who aren't allowed to read, write, own any property, or control their finances. Everyone has societal roles to fill with some women being forced to become "Handmaids," and are then put into service with "Commanders," elite men that have more freedoms then the women of this world. The protagonist Offred is one of these Handmaids, and is slave to the Commander "Fred." One of the purposes of this concubinage is to curb the fertility crisis that is caused by environmental pollution. I don't know how else to recommend this story, but I was left to think about such a world, and it also brings about questions about our own world, our society, and other countries and the freedoms and rights that some people (namely women) have.
5. Frankenstein or The Modern Prometheus
One of the shortest book I read in 2019, but the emotions and romantic imagery are felt so strongly in Mary Shelley's debut novel. If you aren't aware, Frankenstein was published in 1818 anonymously, most likely because women faced much prejudice and were not recognized as writers, much like Mary Ann Evens (George Eliot) and Charlotte Bronte. Mary Shelley also wrote Frankenstein when she was 18, and did so because of a contest she had with Lord Byron, Percy Shelley, and John William Polidori. A capital R romantic novel, the emotions of the creature, Victor Frankenstein, and even Captain Robert Walton, the story's first character we are introduced to, are powerful at times, and they can really hit hard. I heard the emotions of the creature are her own feelings when she was married to Percy Shelley, and the feelings she had when she lost her first child. A terribly sad story, but amazingly written, especially if you like "Ye olde" English.
4. Getting Off: One Woman's Journey Through Porn and Sex Addiction
I was browsing the cheaper books at my local bookstore when I saw this. The cover surprised me, but made me curious, so I peered through it and damn, I was already surprised with the opening few sentences. Erica Garza opens up about her time as an addict of porn and sex, and tells stories of those times, whether one night stands or long term relationships, she tries to find clarity with her abuse of her addiction, and let me tell ya: it can be pretty raw. At around that time, I watched the movie Wild with Reese Witherspoon , which has a similar story, and it made me think of how some people use sex to escape their thoughts and their insecurities, coping with it like using drugs or booze. It is also noteworthy in the discussion of women in porn and in the media, and when feelings of worthlessness exist, those outlets tend to show a path of least resistance to feeling wanted or needed, which can be problematic.
3. 1984
The book I was told about only last year. I always knew who George Orwell was because of Animal Farm, but 1984 got me on a George Orwell kick lately, the man can write some damn good stories, and some interesting essays too. I feel writing about 1984 is something many people have done already in high school since for some, this was part of the English 30-1 curriculum. I did read it twice and I have so much to say, but I will keep it brief. I think it is a story about government surveillance, totalitarianism, love and destroying our basal emotions, and perceived freedom. George Orwell paints a bleak picture of a world with little to no freedoms within the middle and upper classes, but also about how the party controls people to think and act through propaganda, the news and even the language to suit their goals. Winston Smith is a writer working for the ministry of truth, which is responsible with changing the news and stories when someone goes missing, or when events happen that could pose a problem to the general public. The thing I find interesting is how the freedom Winston wants is something the Proles have, but the cost is ignorance and following a system that uses them up, like with the lottery and how the reason there is any money to be won is because we keep buying tickets hoping to win big. The irony is he has to do the same, feign ignorance and follow the system of loving "Big Brother" and all that the party stands for, which he can't when he meets and has an affair with Julia. It is a very relevant book, and I highly recommend 1984 if you have not already read it, but I think one book is closer to reality then this one, one I also read in 2019.
2. Brave New World
There was another book I read this year by Aldous Huxley, and it was Chrome Yellow, his debut novel. The story, frankly, has a whole lot of nothing that goes on, and while that may be, the characters interact and learn about the world and one another. One of the characters, Mr. Scogan, speaks of a future that is reminiscent of Huxley's Brave New World, by noting the freedom of Eros, and the lack of family. In Brave New World, people aren't born, but created in incubators and are assigned specific jobs before they are even born. Alphas are the highest in society and are given many pleasures to feel happy all the time, like through the free distribution of the drug Soma, television, movies, new things and new clothes, and the freedom to sleep with whomever they want, because "everyone belongs to everyone else." One of the characters, Bernard Marx – an Alpha, feels out of place in this society, and because he also works in the area of sleep hypnotism (which is how people learn to behave as they do), he comes to dislike the way the society works. Another character, John, who is from an outside world that still has family values, wishes to explore this "Brave new world!" I always wondered where Huxley was speaking from, a place of malice at the freedoms people want, or on how the things we think we desire are actually ways to control us. I like to think it is the latter because it is so evident in this day of technology, but criticism of certain groups and minorities gaining a voice, or some governments relinquishing rights away from women for example, those have me thinking cynically of this. I mean who knows, the utopia depicted is built on scientific inquiry that allows for freedom, so long as people feel they are free, while the opposite that was prominent before WWII is built on Christian values and the idea of the "Family household." But hey, read it yourself and let's start a discussion.
1. Hey Nostradamus!
I was reading this on a hot summer day after I taught a class, and I couldn't put it down. I ended up walking around town while reading this book, finally finishing it at a cafe. I was so sucked into the story because I saw myself in one of the four main characters, Reg Klassen. But all the characters are interesting to observe and learn about. Douglas Coupland wrote this in response to the Columbine shootings, and as a way to talk about the victims of the shooting since they were shadowed by the shooters. This tale asks many questions, like: Is being right all the time really the way to live? Sure, having the knowledge to understand a situation or something objective is nice and dandy, but is going to far with it a way to keep people in your life? Are our values and beliefs worth holding high and above those we love? Is finding meaning in life a fruitless endeavor when we will only end up 6 feet under? What about old memories or lost loves, do we truly ever forget them, and if not, how much influence do those memories have on our lives? Those questions and more are asked through the lives of the four characters in this book. It really struck a chord with me, and I have read this book three times now and am now reading it a fourth time. There is some dark humour in here, and some crazy intense moments as well, but I think learning more about the human experience involves that ying and yang, seeing the hard times with the nice times.
Other Noteworthy Books
Keep the Aspidistra Flying is a book George Orwell has said he regretted writing, and only did so because he needed money. I mentioned Chrome Yellow by Aldous Huxley already, and while uneventful, it was still an interesting tale. Loner by Teddy Wayne, what starts as a coming of age story turns into a tale about a potential sociopath that seeks to rid himself of his previous life while in Harvard. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, a story about staying true to your goals, a beautiful novel that can also be seen as a self-help book. The Trial by Franz Kafka, a very dark tale that is kind of like 1984, in that conforming to our current reality will give us a perceived "freedom."
What were some of your favourite books that you read in 2019? I am sure you noticed that none of these books were written in 2019, but you know, books are timeless! I believe something is new when we haven't experienced it, or seen it. Stay safe, and share your thoughts!


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Heart failure (HF) represents a major health and economic burden worldwide. In spite of best current therapy, HF progresses with unpredictable episodes of deterioration that often require hospitalisation. These episodes are often preceded by accumulation or redistribution of fluid causing haemodynamic overload on the heart. Remote and telemonitoring of the HF patient, assessing symptoms and signs, thoracic impedance derived fluid status follow-up or direct haemodynamic measurements with chronic implanted devices are presently under investigation for the potential to detect impending HF decompensation early. The current evidence for volume status monitoring in HF using those novel management strategies is reviewed.
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Funding TGVL is supported by a post-doctoral research grant from South-Eastern Norwegian Health Authorities.
Competing interests None.
Provenance and peer review Commissioned; not externally peer reviewed.


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Lakpura Cloves Powder Pack
Lakpura Cloves Powder Pack
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Regular price 7.00 SAR
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(SKU: LS100063F8) Cloves are the dried, unopened, nail-shaped flower buds of the evergreen Syzygium aromaticum. They are reddish-brown in color and have a strong, aromatic flavor and aroma. Cloves come from Madagascar, Indonesia, and Sri Lanka. Though they have a strong flavor and should be used in small amounts to not overpower other flavors, cloves are a great addition to both sweet and savory dishes. They are often used in desserts like apple pie as well as pickling and mulling spice mixes, curries, rice, and in slow cooking broths and stews.
Health Benefits of Cloves,
- Contain important nutrients.
- High in antioxidants.
- May help protect against cancer.
- Can kill bacteria.
- May improve liver health.
- May help regulate blood sugar.
- May promote bone health.
- May reduce stomach ulcers
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The seasoned all-rounder of Zimbabwe, Elton Chigumbura, led them from the front with an unbeaten aggressive match winning fifty vs. the United Arab Emirates.
Tag: Sean Williams
Zimbabwe Bulldozed Pakistan – 1st ODI
Zimbabwe humiliated the visiting Pakistan after 15 years mainly because of a sterling batting by Hamilton Masakadza, Vusi Sibanda and by their hostile bowling.
Amit Mishra led India to a stunning win – 5th ODI vs. Zimbabwe
A deadly spin bowling spell by Amit Mishra laid a strong foundation for another scintillating victory for India who clean swept the series 5-0 vs. Zimbabwe.
India swept the series while beating Zimbabwe – 3rd ODI
Amit Mishra bowled superbly, he laid the foundation of another win for India and their skipper, Virat Kohli, did the rest with the bat as Zimbabwe lost the game.
Vusi Sibanda blasted ton as Zimbabwe won vs. Bangladesh – 3rd ODI
Vusi Sibanda thrashed an unbeaten hundred vs. Bangladesh and the home bowlers restricted the visitors to a reasonable score as Zimbabwe won the game easily.
Enthusiastic Zimbabwe won vs. Bangladesh – 2nd ODI
The charged Zimbabwe team led by the sterling performance of Sean Williams and Elton Chigambura, clinched the 2nd ODI vs. Bangladesh and levelled the series.


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Dated ______________
- _________________
THIS AGREEMENT is made on the _______________
(1) UNA MEDIA LTD, a private limited company registered in England and Wales under number 13586445, whose registered office is at 2 Byam Street, London SW6 2RD, England, represented by _______ (hereinafter, "the Provider"); and
(2) Mrs/Miss/Mr _____________ of [address of the Client], born in _______ (Country) on _______ (hereinafter, "the Client").
(individually, "a Party" and, collectively, "the Parties")
The Provider is a UK social media agency, incubating internet celebrities for most popular social media platforms.
The Client declares to be a performer of proven talents and is looking for a professional to manage, promote and develop the social media accounts it already has and/or will freshly open and set up during the term of this agreement ("the Agreement").
IT IS AGREED as follows (the Schedule/Schedules attached to this Agreement, as signed by the Parties, forming an integral part of this Agreement and being binding on the Parties hereto):
- Appointment – Term of this Agreement – Termination – Effects of Termination.
- The Client appoints the Provider as its Provider for the management, promotion, development, marketing and advertising services ("the Services")requested to the Provider for the already existing accounts of the Client on the following social media platforms ("the Existing Accounts") [list the already existing social media accounts of the Client to be managed] and/or as its exclusive Provider for the Services for any fresh account that the Client shall open and set up during the term of this Agreement ("the New Accounts"; all the accounts to be collectively referred to in this Agreement as "the Accounts").
- The appointment of the Provider shall be for the entire term of this Agreement ("the Term"), which shall come into force on [insert commencement date]and shall continue for a period of 24 months from that date, or 36 months in case of extension Term as per Clause 1.5.
- Either Party shall have the right, by not less than 3 months' written notice to the other prior to the expiry of the initial term of 24 months, to extend the Term for a further period of 12 months, and the appointment of the Provider will be extended accordingly, both for the Existing and the New Accounts.
- The Client agrees that, upon the expiry of this Agreement, and in respect of the rights set out herein, the Provider shall be given priority over other third parties signing with the Client on the same terms and conditions.
- Without prejudice to Clauses 1.2 and 1.3, either Party may early terminate this Agreement, of its own free will and without having to provide any reason for that, by giving to the other Party not less than 30 days' written notice, to expire on or at any time after the first 3 months from the date of commencement of this Agreement. A Party will not be entitled to any compensation nor any damages nor indemnity nor reimbursement nor any payment whatsoever upon, and because of, the early termination of this Agreement under this Clause by the other Party, whatever the reason, subject to the payment to the Provider of the amounts due by the Client for the performance of the Services until the date the early termination will have effect.
- This Agreement will automatically terminate on the happening of any of the following circumstances:
- if either Party commits persistent and/or material breaches of this Agreement, and, in the case of a breach capable of remedy, fails to remedy the same within 14 days after notice of such breach has been given by the non-defaulting Party;
- if either Party becomes subject to any bankruptcy and/or insolvency procedures or calls a meeting of or make any composition or arrangement with his creditors;
- If any sum owed by the Client under any of the provisions of this Agreement is not paid within 60 days of the due date for payment.
- The termination under Clause 1.6 will take place with immediate effect on written notice to the other Party. The rights to terminate this Agreement given by this Clause shall not prejudice any other right or remedy of either Party (if any) in respect of the breach concerned or any other breach.
- Upon expiry or termination of this Agreement for any reason each Party shall, within 10 days of such date, deliver to the other Party – or to such other person as it shall direct – or destroy it by itself according to the request of the other party, and delete it from any storage device, all the Confidential Information – as defined by Clause 5 in this Agreement – that that Party holds about the other Party by such date.
- Indemnity for the Provider for termination caused by the Client.
- The Parties agree that, if this Agreement shall terminate on the occurrence of any of the circumstances under Clause 1.6 regarding the Client – and unless such an occurrence is due to force majeure– the Client shall pay to the Provider an indemnity based on the number of fans/followers that the Client got after the commencement date of this Agreement for any of the Accounts and the average monetization ability of the Accounts in the same period.
- In assessing such an indemnity, the Parties will consider factors such as the increase in the number of fans/followers as a consequence of the promotional and marketing activities by the Provider, the increase in the advertising turnover of the Accounts, the increase and improvement in the indexation of the Accounts by specialist websites, the fact that the Client may continue, even after the termination, to derive substantial benefits due to the increase in business already generated by the Provider etc.
- Such an indemnity shall be equitable, and any indemnity payment shall not exceed a figure equivalent to the Provider's average fee payments for the last 12 months before the date of termination and, where this Agreement has run for less than 12 months, the average will be taken over the months that the Agreement has run.
- The payment of an indemnity shall not prevent the Provider from seeking damages for the loss of this Agreement or the inability to amortize the costs and expenses incurred by it in the performance of this Agreement. However, the Provider must inform the Client of its intention to seek such damages and/or an indemnity within 2 months of the termination of this Agreement.
- The Services.
- The Provider shall provide the Client with professional advice and services on expanding personal social media accounts performance on platforms such as TikTok, Douyin, Xiaohongshu, Instagram, Twitter etc., as listed in Clause 1.1 or as from time to time set up during the Term of this Agreement.
- The Services for the Accounts shall include, depending on the circumstances, setting up and management of the Accounts, position set up, assistance on video shooting and post video editing, availability of private resources [these needs be specified], assignment of a personal associate to the Client, taking and handling of advertising orders, business cooperation with brands or influencers. For the New Accounts of the Client – which will be set up during the Term of this Agreement and will be managed exclusively by the Provider – the Services shall include monitoring social media conversations and responding to the same.
- The Client acknowledges that the taking of advertisement is of the essence for the promotion, development and building up of the Accounts and, therefore, the Client agrees that a separate fee will be paid to the Provider on advertising taken by the Provider for the Accounts.
- The Provider will provide the Services to the Client by using its reasonable endeavours.
- For the better promotion and marketing of the Accounts, the Client shall provide the Provider with a portfolio of videos of its most popular and liked performancesand update it on a regular basis.
- To the purpose of the content upload, the Client shall provide at least 1 video every 3 days for "Beauty Series Content" and at least 1 video every 7 days for "Stories/Drama Series". Such videos shall be in formats and of a duration and number of bytes accepted for upload by the relevant social media platform. The content of the videos shall not be in violation of any law and/or inappropriate.
- Fees – Late payment – Interest.
4.1 As a consideration for the Services rendered by the Provider under this Agreement, the Client shall pay the Provider a variable percentage fee ("the Variable Fee") calculated on the gross revenue of the Accounts and the number of fans/followers of the Accounts from time to time and, in addition to the Variable Fee, also a fixed fee on the taking of advertising ("the Advertising Fee") equivalent to 30 (thirty) % – or the different percentage as specified in Schedule 1 attached to this Agreement – of the gross revenue of the advertising order taken for any of the Accounts.
4.2 The definitions of "gross revenue" for the purposes of the calculation of the Variable Fee and the Advertising Fee, as well as the business ratio for the Variable Fee and the terms and deadlines for the payment of the Variable Fee and the Advertising Fee are specified in Schedule 1 attached to this Agreement.
4.3 All sums payable under this Agreement are exclusive of any Value Added Tax or other applicable tax, which shall be added to the sum in question or otherwise included in any relevant calculation, and where any withholding tax or similar deduction is required to be made, the sum in question shall be paid net of that deduction.
4.4 Without prejudice to the provisions on the termination of this Agreement, on any amount paid by Client with a delay of more than 30 days of the date the payment is due, late payment statutory interest will be due, in accordance with the Late Payment of Commercial Debts (Interest) Act 1998, at a rate of 8% on top of the Bank of England base rate from time to time, and this from the date the payment was due.
- Confidential Information – Trade Secrets.
5.1 The terms of this Agreement, and the substance of all negotiations in connection with it, are confidential to the Parties and their advisers, who shall not disclose them ("the Confidential Information") to, or otherwise communicate such Confidential Information to, any third party without the written consent of the other Party other than:
(a) The Parties' respective auditors, insurers and lawyers on terms which preserve confidentiality.
(b) Pursuant to an order of a court of competent jurisdiction, or pursuant to any proper order or demand made by any competent authority or body where they are under a legal or regulatory obligation to make such a disclosure.
(c) Pursuant to any express requirement under the rules of any listing authority or stock exchange on which the Party's shares are subject. And
(d) As far as necessary to implement and enforce any of the terms of this Agreement.
- Either Party shall keep confidential the trade secrets, cooperation matters and other confidential information and information of the other Party that it knows, or has access to, as a result of signing or performing this Agreement. Neither Party shall disclose, give or transfer such confidential information to a third party without the written consent of the other Party.
- Except for the work required by this Agreement, the trademark, logo, business information, technology and other materials of each Party shall not be used or copied without the prior consent of the other Party.
- For the avoidance of doubt, nothing in this Clause 5 prevents the Parties from making a disclosure to a regulator regarding any alleged misconduct, wrongdoing, or serious breach of regulatory requirements, or making a disclosure to any law enforcement agency regarding an alleged criminal offence or co-operating with any law enforcement agency regarding a criminal investigation or prosecution.
- Upon expiry or termination of this Agreement each Party shall immediately cease to process the Confidential Information about the other Party.
- The obligations of confidentiality under this Clause shall not apply to Confidential Information to the extent that the same shall have come into the public domain.
- No Partnership – Assignment – Entire Agreement.
- Nothing in this Agreement shall create or be deemed to create a partnership or the relationship of employer and employee between the Parties.
- This Agreement is personal to the Parties and neither Party may, without the prior written consent of the other Party, transfer the benefit of this Agreement or sub-contract or delegate to any third Party the performance of its duties under this Agreement.
- This Agreement contains the entire and only agreement between the Parties and supersedes, if any, all previous agreements between the Parties respecting the subject matter of this Agreement.
- Each Party acknowledges and agrees that in entering into this Agreement it has not relied on, and shall have no remedy in respect of, any statement, representation, undertaking or warranty, whether oral or in writing, save as are expressly set out in this Agreement.
- Governing law – Jurisdiction – Variation.
- This Agreement and any dispute or claim (including non-contractual disputes or claims) arising out of or in connection with it or its subject matter or formation or execution shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of England and Wales.
- Each Party irrevocably agrees that the courts of England and Wales shall have exclusivejurisdiction to settle any dispute or claim (including non-contractual disputes or claims) arising out of or in connection with this Agreement or its subject matter or formation or execution.
- No variation of this Agreement shall be effective unless it is in writing and signed by the parties (or their authorised representatives).
- Notices and Service.
- This Agreement and any dispute or claim (including non-contractual disputes or claims) arising out of or in connection with it or its subject matter or formation or execution shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of England and Wales.
- Any notice to be given under this Agreement given by each of the Parties shall be deemed to be properly given if sent by recorded post with proof of receipt and deemed delivered on the day of receipt; or sent – unless it's a notice in proceedings – by email before 4.30pm on a working day (a working day excludes Saturdays, Sundays and Bank Holidays) and deemed delivered on the day after (even in the absence of a read receipt):
(a) if given to the Provider, addressed to it at the following postal address: __________ or emailed to it at the email address __________;
(b) if given to the Client, addressed to it at the following postal address: _______ or at its last known address or emailed to it at the email address______.
- No notice in proceedings shall be served by email. The Parties' addresses for service are those stated at the beginning of this Agreement.
Signed on __________:
(_____________ – Authorised Representative)
Mrs/Miss/ Mr _________
Signed on __________:
(_____________ – Authorised Representativ


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In this Soul teaching on the secret to raising your vibrational frequency on the Twin Flame and ascension journey that no-one else is telling you, you will learn: The truth about energy clearing as the ticket to Twin Flame union Why most 'energy clearings' don't work...
In this Soul teaching on the ultimate guide to Bach Flowers for Soul Partnership healing, you will learn: What Bach Flower remedies are and how they can help you How to use the free Bach Flower test to find the remedy most needed at this moment in your spiritual...
In this Soul teaching on is your subconscious mind running the show in your life and business, you will learn: How your subconscious mind is really the one calling the shots in your life Why subconscious programming overrules your conscious desires How you are...
In this Soul teaching on having lots of money or the perfect relationship will NOT make you happy, you will learn: The truth about getting everything you've ever wanted and your happiness Why being happy is your own responsibility Why nothing outside of yourself will...
In this Soul teaching on the Universe doesn't do injustice, you will learn: How the injustice in your life is an invitation to go within Why you must look through the illusion of injustice to see what's really going on How any rejection you experience is actually...
In this Soul teaching on the real reason money is tight, you will learn: Why your subconscious beliefs around money are directly related to your relationship with money How past lives bleeding through to your current life influence your money flow How your thoughts...
Spiritual author, Multidimensional Healer, Founder of Soul Embodiment™ Therapy & the School of Soul Embodiment.
In this Soul teaching on healing your money drama, trauma, and karma, you will learn:
It's been a while since I have written on the topic of money, so this is the perfect time to look back over the past years in which I have drastically changed my money story. I went from living on welfare to six figures, traveling around the world and now living in Ibiza, Spain and the truth is that each level, has its own devil.
Every time you want to make a quantum leap in your relationship with money, you need to release an old belief around money that no longer serves you.
I am sharing with you my personal story not to brag about my success, but to show you what is possible once we tap into the quantum field of unlimited abundance. Scarcity and lack are 3D fear-based concepts, as the Universe itself is created in forever overflowing abundance. What stands in the way of us tapping into this abundance are our own subconscious fears and false beliefs around money.
Especially when we are living in lack, we think that having money solves our problems and it doesn't because the truth is that it's not only the poor that have money struggles. People with money, have money struggles too and sometimes it's the exact same struggles they had when they were poor, except now it's with larger numbers. This was certainly true for me.
I started off as a single mom on welfare, trying to find a way to be able to earn money from home so that I could be there for my children who had just lost their dad to divorce, their older brother to incarceration, and their baby sister to a rare birth defect. The last thing my kids needed was an absent mother because she was the sole breadwinner and out of the house working 40+ hours a week.
So, I created an online business and got myself and my kids off of welfare. However, it didn't take long for me to bang up to my own money limitations which kept me unable to get past the 10K a month. If you have to share a percentage of your revenue or you need to pay for staff 10K a month is nothing and unless I was able to get 10K a month I wouldn't be able to sustain a business. Everything was going downhill at lightning speed at that time and I was searching frantically for a way to turn things around before time ran out, which it of course never does but I was afraid back then it would.
Just, in the nick of time, just before I thought it would all come crashing down I found a past life belief (click on the link to read the story) around believing that it wasn't safe to be rich and a little after I healed this belief with a healer, the 10K months started flowing in.
But I was still in a very toxic and abusive business relationship which created a lot of stress in my life. In 2014 after the person I worked with had pulled away my team for the umpteenth time to get me to do what he wanted, I hired one of his developers who is still with me now seven years later and I set out to find a designer. As fate had it I found more than that and ended up meeting my Twin Flame, who ran an online web design and marketing company from India.
Our business relationship was very short-lived and through a mutual friend I ended up finding a good designer, who traveled with me when I went to India when my twin and I met face to face. Personally, I am not crazy about the twin label, when I talk about this person I always just say his name. It's only when I write about him publicly that I use this term for lack of a better way of describing who I am talking about.
That trip to India changed everything and when I came back I phased out my web design and online marketing clients and became an online healer and coach for Twin Flames (I dislike this word even more). When my twin married someone else, I literally felt my soul calling me to move to Ibiza, Spain, and went to check it out. While Spain itself is not an expensive place to live, Ibiza is much more expensive than the rest of Spain which meant that I had to triple my then revenue to be able to live here. Six months later, in a completely new market, I was back to five-figure months and had my first six-figure year shortly after.
When I got back from hosting a retreat in Ibiza I was urged by the signs and synchronicities in my life to go travel the world first. I had no savings in the bank whatsoever, but I was almost debt-free and simply took a leap of faith. Two months into our trip, I had for the first time ever in my life crossed the six-figures.
As synchronicity would have it I was on my way to Egypt when my twin told me in a dream that he was going to be a father. I reached out to congratulate him the next day and after stalling for close to one hour he confirmed that his wife was pregnant and due around the time that I was hosting my next retreat in India. Egypt turned out to be a country that I had huge karma with and that was connected to the child being born to my twin as well.
Our travels actually didn't get cut short by the pandemic, but by my teenage son railing out of control due to a lack of structure, lack of real-life friendships, and a worsening Fortnite addiction. Traveling the world was not doing him the good I hoped it would. I got him a personal trainer, set out to find a house, and get him back in school which solved both the problem of structure and real-life friends instead of gaming friends that were as addicted as he was.
This is where the story behind this teaching begins because although I was making good money and was renting a house that was less than one-third of my income I started to see that my money struggles hadn't changed that much since I had been a single mom on welfare. I was having the exact same money problems except now with a factor of 10x to 20x more money coming in. However, it continued to be the exact same pattern I was playing out, only now with higher numbers.
We tend to make a big deal out of money, but the truth is that money is just energy. And it's not just any energy, it's the energy of love. This is why people who struggle with love, tend to also struggle with money. In other words, our love wounds are our money wounds.
Now let's first zoom in on this idea that money is love….
Money takes care of us and provides for us. It puts a roof over our head, food on the table, it puts clothes on our bodies. It pays for our hot and cold water, our heating and air conditioning, our furniture, and transport. Money gives us everything we need and more.
Everything that a loving parent would provide for us, money does for us as well. 'Bad' people can do bad things with money, but money itself is not bad or evil. Money is love, and the more we can allow ourselves to love ourselves – the more we can allow love and money into our life.
Everyone that wants to go back to a barter system and get rid of money, has not thought things through. Money saves us the time to have to trade to the currency of apples, pineapples, sheep, and so on because our landlord or the telephone company won't accept grapes. Just imagine paying your phone bill in oranges, or to pump gas at the gas station and pay in coconuts.
Money is not the issue, your hangups around money is what's creating the money drama you experience. This is why we don't need to get rid of money but instead get rid of our hangups around it.
Money is love, if we have a difficult relationship with money it's because deep down we have a difficult relationship with love.
Before I share the story of my own subconscious hangups around money that led me to write this teaching, I first want to get into where our hangups around money come from.
Like all our subconscious fears and false beliefs, our money hangups come from:
When healing our relationship with money this is where we have to look, to be able to heal how money shows up in our lives. My own money story that I have shared with you, is living proof of this principle. The difference between me being able to go from €1100 a month on welfare to €11.000 and more a month as a business owner is due to the fact that I worked on my subconscious wounds around money.
In the United States, only 12% of female-led businesses bring in more than $100K per year, which means that 88% of these female business owners haven't crossed the six-figures in their businesses. This was me as well for the first 7 years of entrepreneurship, I was stuck under my own subconsciously self-constructed glass ceiling.
As a business owner, there is no pension plan, you are your pension plan. If you don't financially plan for your own future, no one else will. What people who don't own businesses also tend to forget is that businesses pay tax, both VAT and income tax, or other variants depending on your company setup. This means that a considerable part of this 100K goes to the government and that you don't actually get to keep all of it. It also means that 88% of the female business owners in the United States are just scraping by.
They have created a job for themselves, not a business. But, they don't have the security and the benefits that come with an actual job.
The reason why so many of these women are just getting by is because, they are banging up against their subconscious blocks to money, and probably if you held a survey they would tell you they also struggled with love. One of my own mentors and my client as well set out to heal what she called 'the 18-month relationship curse'. Every relationship she had would die out within one and a half years. She healed her wounds towards love with a method she now teaches others, which transformed her money story as well. This allowed her to build a million-dollar business and she has been together with her man for multiple years now.
This is what can happen for all of us when we heal our wounds to love and our stories around money. I really want to make this crystal clear, anyone can do this when they address their subconscious wounds. You do not have to be a business genius, you don't even need to own a business. You can improve the way money shows up in your life right now, simply working with what you have. If you're unemployed, this could help you get a job. If you have a job, this could help you get a promotion. Someone who owes you money may suddenly send a check, you may meet a partner who has a more luxurious lifestyle that upgrades yours as well.
Money can come into your life in a million and one ways, once you heal what is causing the disconnect you have between money and you.
It all comes down to the relationship you have with money and essentially the relationship you have with love. That is to say, the actual relationship you have with money, not the one you think you have because those are usually two different things. The relationship we think we have with money is based on our conscious beliefs around money.
The actual relationship we have with money is based on our subconscious beliefs around money and the money reality we are living.
Nine times out of ten, we aren't even aware of how bad our relationship with money is until we dive deep into our money story. This was absolutely true for me, although I had already done so much inner money work and had upgraded my lifestyle drastically. I found out the hard way that my relationship with money despite all my conscious positive beliefs around it was in essence still wrought with fear due to unresolved past life trauma.
Working with one of the healers connected to the School of Soul Embodiment we went to explore my soul's different timelines around money, Poverty or wealth is just one of the many variables that the soul chooses from to craft each lifetime to support what the soul desires to experience.
Being born in poverty is never meant as a life sentence to remain poor and there are of course many rags to riches stories throughout history that prove this to be true. You are never meant to be poor, you simply chose poverty on a soul level to heal wounds around money or other wounds that require a lack of money to be part of the experience.
In my session with the healer, we first went back to a past life where I was a man in Egypt. I was a merchant who had a lamp shop, but I had something like five or six businesses in total, what we would call multiple streams of income today. I was rich and well respected, I was very talented with money. I not only knew how to make money but also how to invest it and make my investments grow. My name was Achmet, I had a very loving and supportive wife and beautiful children. I not only had a lot of money, but I was also generous with my money and supported my community where it was needed. My ability to receive and to give money was in total flow and harmony.
When we zoomed in on my relationship with money as Achmet, I saw that I considered money my friend. This was also how money showed up in my life as a good friend, that supported me in living a good life, and in realizing my visions and dreams.
Money was my best friend and as such, we did great things together, had a great time doing it, and couldn't get enough of each other.
Except this was not the money program I was subconsciously running in my current life. Money and I weren't BFFs now and so we went to pull up the timeline that was creating the havoc in my current timeline. We instantly first landed back in the past life I had already cleared about it not being safe to be rich, this was a lifetime in England in which my family had betrayed me,
After going crazy and dying in a mental asylum in that lifetime, I came back as a girl being raised by her sickly grandmother. This was also a lifetime in England, where I was around 14 or 15 years old and working as a servant for a rich family. The family was horrible to their staff and exploited them, it was actually much more like slavery but I endured it because I needed the money to take care of my grandmother who was my only living relative.
I had to work extremely hard for my money and on top of it, all the son of the house would rape me. When my grandmother died, I had nothing to live for and I committed suicide because I felt that my life was just too hard for me to continue.
This was the second time that I saw a life in which I had committed suicide which prompted me to look into suicide a little bit deeper. I found that when we commit suicide, we often are stuck in that pattern for multiple lifetimes which I found interesting because I know that in my previous life before my current lifetime I committed suicide as well.
In fact, the story of this past life as the young servant girl Rose and the lifetime as Lies in the Netherlands during the Second World War (read her story here) are very similar. They both were poor, had very hard and difficult lives, they both were sexually abused, and only had one source of love in their life. Rose had her sickly grandmother that she needed to take care of and Lies had her married lover.
It would not surprise me if, in the lifetime that I felt betrayed by my family who had me locked up in an asylum to get control over my money, I committed suicide as well or in another lifetime in between then and now. But it would seem that in my lifetime as Rose, Lies, and even my current lifetime now, that we are still healing the wounds of the betrayal I felt by my family, that created deep wounds of love.
Wounds of love that I did not have in the lifetime of Achmet, where I had a very loving and supportive wife, children, family, and community.
What makes all of the above even more interesting was how the story of Rose was still playing out in my life right now. Rose had a very fearful relationship with money and she was deeply entrapped in scarcity- and lack-programming, this was also true for Lies in the other life as she grew up in a church orphanage where she was raised to become a nun. Lies owned nothing, earned nothing, and had nothing. She was as poor as a church mouse. My current life is the first lifetime in which I have broken this pattern of poverty.
The poverty I had chosen from my fear-based belief that being rich meant losing everything including myself due to the traumatic experience of being betrayed by my family for money and being committed to a mental asylum. Poverty became my reality because I subconsciously believed that poverty would keep me safe and wealth would put me at risk of being hurt.
This is why Rose and Lies had almost no family and practically no money because they were still trying to heal the trauma of the life where I was a wealthy English lord, who was stripped of everything by what he perceived as his greedy family.
But, because I had checked out prematurely in both of those lives I was still left with people, experiences, and situations being pulled into my current life to heal the original trauma of the English lord, but also the accumulated trauma of these lifetimes where I had added to the unresolved trauma and pain as these two young women, which was why the past life trauma of first Lies and now Rose was getting triggered.
Rose's dominant belief around money was that you had to work hard to have it.
At first, I thought maybe it was ancestral as my mother's side of the family is not very affluent. My mother also had to work extremely hard for her money in her life, was it maybe that I subconsciously didn't want to make my mother feel bad by not having to work as hard for my money as she did?
But the truth is that I have also had to work hard to get where I am now. I just didn't need to break my back doing it, like my mother who had worked as a nurse most of her life and cleaned houses to earn a living when we lived in America and has always only had just enough to get by.
Interestingly enough, when I made a shift in my business that would allow me to create money with more ease and without depleting myself as I had been doing for the past years and years – Rose's lifetime came up to be cleared. This is because her belief was stilled stored in the subconscious and it contradicted my conscious desire, to earn money with more ease.
The subconscious is they say 3000x more powerful than the conscious, so it will cancel out our conscious desires if they are conflicting with the installed software (our fears and false beliefs).
Ever since I moved into my current house, which was a year ago, I have been struggling with my money flow and I went into an energy of worry around money. It didn't keep me up at night, but there was less flow, more struggle and I definitely had to work even harder to create the amount of money I needed to pay for everything and live comfortably.
This all made COMPLETE sense when I recognized the family's son in Rose's lifetime. This man had come back in my current life as my landlord and he had not changed much. I remember describing how the family in Rose's life treated their staff, which was like disposable objects.
That is exactly how my landlord treats his tenants as well, despite the fact that we (my neighbors and I, the house next to ours is also his) almost paid him a six-figure amount in rent over the past year. Not only that, I recently found out that I pay six thousand a year more than all the other long-term tenants in our complex. The owner of the real estate agency, through which I got the rental contract lives here as well and they pay five hundred a month less for the exact same house, square meters, amount of rooms, etc.
What I realized is that I was in this situation with this man, because his family not only extorted me in a previous lifetime, he had been the one that raped me. I was here as his tenant, experiencing the same energy from him because I still needed to forgive him and restore our connection back to love on a soul level.
My mother always says that the people you live with, buy a house, or rent from are people that you have karma with and that was certainly true in this case.
We are so used to thinking that karma is either a reward or a punishment, that we don't realize that karma is the unresolved energy that we carry with us from previous lifetimes. Rose hated her life so much, that she ended it. She had nothing to live for and the family she worked for only made it worse, especially the family's son who also used her for his own gratification.
These themes of family betrayal (the English lord) and being used for someone's own gratification (Rose and Lies) played out again in my current life through the incest I experienced as a very young child. This does not make my father's behavior acceptable, but it does show us the underlying soul dynamics at play and how accurate 'karma' (unresolved trauma energy) works. It literally attracts to it, its own to help us heal it.
There was a lot of unresolved trauma and pain that I was still subconsciously carrying from these different timelines, which pulled in the people, situations, and experiences to help me heal it once and for all. This healing included reconnecting to the soul that was one of the main characters in Rose's life to restore our soul connection back to love.
This shows us that karma doesn't always manifest itself the way we would think it does. Looking at it from a 3D perspective, you would think this man owed me. Yet, here he was back in my life treating me exactly like he had in his lifetime with Rose.
I had recently emailed him to discuss lowering the rent and despite having had renters from hell in the past and me having improved the house a lot, he told me he had no issue at all with me leaving. I remember saying to a friend that the money itself, wasn't even the main issue for me, but what really rubbed me the wrong way was his attitude of complete lack of appreciation.
It was that energy of being completely disposable to him, that really hit a nerve for me because that was the unresolved trauma from the lifetime of Rose that I was still subconsciously carrying.
Had he simply made it up to me by being a loving and generous landlord, I would not have been triggered to release the unresolved pain and trauma around that lifetime that I still carried. These were such low vibrational energies that were stuck such as shame, guilt, hopelessness, anger, despair, resentment, and so on from that lifetime as Rose that still needed to be released.
Not to mention her false belief that you need to work hard to earn money and the utterly fear-based relationship she had with money that was so deeply anchored in scarcity-, survival-, and lack-programming.
It might have been more comfortable for me if he had been more generous and loving, but by showing up the way he has, he gave me an even bigger gift – the opportunity to heal my relationship with money (through love) on a much deeper level.
At this moment I cannot tell you yet how healing this past life will work through in my relationship with my landlord, but I know it can only be one of two options; either he changes and our relationship is restored to love not only on a soul level but also on a physical level or we are moved out of each other's lives because our karma is done.
I absolutely love this house and I love living here, but I also know that if this house has served its purpose that something better will come and that everything that is needed to support me now, will align perfectly. I will write an update when the energetic shifts have manifested themselves physically.
We all have a choice to run our lives including money on the platform of fear or the platform of love, consciously we will of course always choose the platform of love. I hope in sharing my own story, you are able to see how past (life) experiences can have us subconsciously still running the program of fear without us even realizing it.
Part of the Ascension process is fully shifting from the operating system of fear to love, and money is just another area of our lives where we have to change our subconscious operating system.
Clearing this lifetime of Rose, was my opportunity to shift my operating system from fear to love. I also cannot share yet how this will work through in my finances, as it has only been days since I saw this lifetime – the shift in energy is still working through. I will also write a future update on how this changed my money story.
I decided last year to become a millionaire, simply because I want to experience the fun, joy, ease, and freedom that comes along with this level of expansion and to create generational wealth that I can pass onto my children and grandchildren. I was not passed on any generational wealth from my own parents, my mother is still alive and my father is deceased. There was a small inheritance from my father, but my stepmother seems to have disappeared with the four shares that were meant for my father's biological children,
This is yet another example of conscious desire conflicting with subconscious beliefs: the lifetime of Rose was subconsciously canceling out my desire for such wealth and ease, her pattern of believing that you have to work hard to earn money definitely kept me in struggle mode as well. This is because the subconscious applies all beliefs to the self in the here and now as if they are still true today. So, even though this was her belief say around two centuries ago, the subconscious mind still believed it was true for me today and created my external money reality based on this false belief.
Being able to take a peek into Achmet's lifetime and money story, on the other hand, showed me that I had been running the operating system of love before and if I had done it before, it means I can do it again. It was only unresolved trauma that had bumped me off of it. I could now choose to go back to love, in the same way as that I had chosen to restore the relationship with my landlord's soul back to love.
Yet, this is only possible when we have addressed the underlying trauma that shifted the operating system in the first place. We can't bypass trauma, simply by willing things to be so. This is a huge misconception in for example the Law of Attraction scene, where they believe that they can consciously reprogram their subconscious beliefs by using pure will and repetition. This often triggers the unresolved trauma that is blocking the conscious desire to be played out in their reality experience, much in the same way that I have had to for example play out certain aspects of the lifetime as Rose in my current reality.
I pray this teaching on money helps you shift your operating system from fear to love, please check out our offer below to be able to work with the exact same healers that have helped me transform my money story. Students of the School of Soul Embodiment get access to my personal team of healers. This is an extra service to my clients to allow them to hit the ground running.
Update 2 September 2021 – the energy between the landlord and I has already shifted to neutral. In a session with a healer who is also clairvoyant, she was reading my energy and asked if I had moved since our last session which I have not. The energy around the house had shifted so deeply that it almost felt as if I lived in a different place. The only thing that changed has been my decision to lead by example and be the love I want to see.
Book a Soulology or Soul Embodiment™ Therapy session with me to find the psychological patterns and subconscious programming that are keeping you from creating the life and reality you dream of.
You can also join my signature program Coming into Oneness for a step-by-step manual to the Soul Embodiment process. This program is a 12-month immersion into coming back into Oneness with your soul.
It's through healing the wounded ego, that we not only embody our soul – but unlock our soul's superpower to create the reality we dream of.
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This is because your ego and your soul aren't on the same page. The key to unlocking your private version of Paradise is healing the separation between the ego and your soul.
With my deepest love,
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Have you tried everything else to manifest the life of your dreams, but failed? This is because your conscious and your subconscious were not on the same page.


text:
Weyermann CARAAMBER is a drum-roasted caramel malt made from two-row German barley that can be used to improve flavour stability, fullness and enhance colour. Full red colour is achieved as well as better mash efficiency when using CARAAMBER, while flavours of toffee, caramel and bread are imparted.
Colour °L: 23.1-30.6
Usage Rate: Up to 20%


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