text:
God Will Save Me!
A city is experiencing a terrible flood. A man is sitting on his front porch watching the water rise and a jeep drives up. "Get in! Everything's going to be underwater!" "No thanks. God will save me. An hour passes and the water Has risen in the house. A boat comes by. "Get in! You're going to drown!" "No thanks. God will save me." The water rises over the house. The man is now on the roof. A helicopter flies overhead. "We'll lower a line. Grab it or you'll die!" "No thanks. God will save me." The man drowns. When he gets to Heaven and meets God he says, "God! Why didn't you save me?!"
"I sent a jeep, a boat, and a helicopter. What more did you want?"
via Much of the Religious Right is becoming increasingly obsessed with a war on demons. In this worldview every obstacle from microphone static to cancer is a manifestation of an attack by the devil. : science.
why brides wear white
The curate of a large and fashionable church was endeavoring to teach the significance of white to a Sunday-school class. "Why," said he, "does a bride invariably desire to be clothed in white at her marriage?" As no one answered, he explained. "White," said he, "stands for joy, and the wedding-day is the most joyous occasion of a woman's life." A small boy queried, "Why do the men all wear black?"
A man walks into a bar and sits down and order 4 shots of whiskey
A man walks into a bar and sits down and order 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks the fellow, "what's the occasion?"
The guy says, "my first blowjob."
The bartender says, "Well now, that sure is worth celebrating. Hell, I`ll buy you another shot. It's on me!"
The man says, "No thanks. If 4 shots don't get rid of the taste…"
Can cold water clean dishes?
This is for all the germ conscious folks that worry about using cold water to clean.
John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan
After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast. However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate, and questioned his grandfather asking, 'Are these plates clean?'
His grandfather replied, 'They're as clean as cold water can get em. Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!'
For lunch the old man made hamburgers. Again, John was concerned about the plates, as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, 'Are you sure these plates are clean?'
Without looking up the old man said, 'I told you before, Sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret, I don't want to hear another word about it!'
Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass.
John yelled and said, 'Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car'.
Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted! 'Coldwater, go lay down now, yah hear me!'
Baseball Vs Porn
A man watching a baseball game on TV kept switching channels to a dirty movie featuring a lusty couple.
"I don't know whether to watch them or the game," he said to his wife.
"For heaven's sake, watch them fuck," his wife said."You already know how to play baseball!"
Women, the best freaking firewall in the world
1. One human cell contains 75MB genetic information.
2. One sperm contains a half of that; that is 37.5MB.
3. One ml of semen contains 100 million sperms.
4. In average, ejaculation lasts for 5 sec and contains 2.25 ml semen.
5. This means that the throughput of a man's member is equal to (37.5MB x 100,000,000 x 2.25)/5 = 1 687 500 000 000 000 byte/second = 1,6875 Тerabyte/sec
This means that the female eggcell withstands this DDoS attack at 1,5 terabyte per second, and only lets through one(!) data package, thereby being the best freaking hardware firewall in the world!
The downside of it is that this only small data package that it lets through, hangs the system for the whole of 9 months!
so a democrat break his foot…
"A member of the House Democratic Caucus goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "I have bad news and good news. The bad news is you have a broken foot. The good news is, you're a congressman, which means you have health insurance, which means you'll be able to get treatment without going totally bankrupt, unlike many of your constituents, who you are actively betraying by thinking only of your electoral prospects. And also," the doctor continued, "I can't believe you actually broke your foot by jumping off a bridge just because a Republican told you to. What kind of spineless loser are you? Get out of my office. I can't stand to look at you."
In a vacuum
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.
It was her turn.
She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?
I have a dick, and you dont!
Boy: I have a dick, and you dont!
Girl: My mother said, when I grow up, I can have as many as I want
Rolex and Timex
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
"HELLLOOOOOOO……," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"
Ranult and Ford's New Car
Renault and Ford are working on a new small car for women. They are mixing the Clio and the Taurus, and calling it the "Clitaurus." It comes in pink, with or without fur on the dash, and the average male thief won't be able to find it, even if someone tells him where it is.
We're in trouble
The Population of this country is 300 million.
160 million are retired.
That leaves 140 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school.
Which leaves 55 million to do the work.
Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal government.
Leaving 20 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden.
Which leaves 17.2 million to do the work.
Take from that total the 15.8 million people who work for state and city governments
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.
Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.
And there you are, sitting on your ass, at your computer, reading jokes.
Nice. Real nice.
rude beer drinker
A man comes home one day and sits down the cough with a thud. He bellows to his wife to bring him a beer. She comes out with a can in her hand. He says, "In a glass you wench." She leaves and returns with a glass of beer. He takes the beer without saying anything. She says, "I could have poisoned that." He looks at his wife and says,"And I would drink it anyway."
Male or Female?
I am still out there job hunting. I always have a problem when filling out the job application and I get to the part about 'Sex: F or M.' I never knows which to choose – I really like to Fuck, but I spends most of the time alone Masturbating.
Be Careful What You Bet On
During an IRS audit, the auditor looked at the tax payer and exclaimed…
… Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I m not sure the IRS finds that believable. I m a great gambler, and I can prove it, says Ralph. How about a demonstration? The auditor thinks for a moment and said, Okay. Go ahead. Ralph says, I ll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye. The auditor thinks a moment and says, No way! It s a bet. Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor s jaw drops. Ralph says, Now, I ll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye. The auditor can tell Ralph isn t blind, so he takes the bet. Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Ralph s attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous. Want to go double or nothing? Ralph asks. I ll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between. The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there s no way this guy can manage that stunt, so he agrees again. Ralph stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, and urinates all over the desk.
The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Ralph's attorney moans and puts his head in his hands. Are you okay? the auditor asks. Not really, says the attorney.
This morning, when Ralph told me he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty thousand dollars that he could come in here and pee all over your desk and that you d be happy about it.
how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized
During a visit to the mental asylum, I asked the director how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. "Well," said the director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient And ask him or her to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup." "No." said the director, "A normal person would pull the plug….. Do you want a bed near the window?"
Where's the scratch?
Customer: "Hello, young man, can you help me?"
Me: "Yes ma'am. What can I do for you?"
Customer: "Where do you keep your scratch?"
Me: "Excuse me?"
Customer: "Scratch! Where do you keep it? I need some to make pie!"
Me: "I'm not sure that I'm clear on what you need. Can you tellme what you are going to use it for?"
Customer: "My husband says that I need to make pie from scratch for Christmas, so I need to buy some scratch for the pie."
Me: "Ma'am, that just means that you buy the ingredients and make the pie yourself."
Customer: "I don't have time to make pie myself! I need some scratch!"
Going Home Early
Is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early
Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."
Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."
Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."
Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.
Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."
Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."
Johnny is even madder than before.
Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."
Teacher: "That's right Nancy , you may also leave."
Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.
When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"
The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"
Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"
Two rules to success in life
1. Don't tell people everything you know.
Over confident CEO
A new CEO takes over at a struggling company and decides to get rid of all the slackers.
On a tour of the facilities, the CEO notices a guy leaning on a wall. He can't believe this guy would just stand around on the job.
The new CEO walks up to the guy leaning against the wall and asks, "What are you doing here?"
"I'm just waiting to get paid," responds the man.
Furious, the CEO asks "How much money do you make a week?"
A little surprised, the young fellow replies, "I make about $300 a week. Why?"
The CEO quickly gets out his checkbook, hands the guy a check made out to cash for $1,200 and says, "Here's four weeks' pay, now get out and don't come back."
The man puts the check in his pocket and promptly walks out.
Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO looks around the room and asks, "Does anyone want to tell me what just happened here?"
From across the room comes a voice, "Yeah, you just tipped the pizza delivery guy $1,200."
religious kids
Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee..
The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest ; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."
The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room everyone says 'Your Eminence'."
The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."
Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well……?" She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breasts, 24″ waist and 34″ hips.
When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God."
The Winking Sales Man
A man with a winking problem applies for a position as a traveling salesman and goes in for an interview.
"Looking at your résumé, I can see that you're more than qualified," says the interviewer. "Unfortunately, we can't have our sales reps constantly winking at customers, so we can't hire you."
"But wait," says the man. "If I take two aspirin, I stop winking."
"Then show me," replies the interviewer.
So the guy reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a pile of condoms in all different shapes, sizes, and colors before finally finding a packet of aspirin. He pops the pills and immediately stops winking.
"It's great you stopped winking," says the interviewer, "but we can't have our salesmen womanizing all over the country."
"What do you mean?" asks the man. "I'm happily married."
"How do you explain all the condoms?" asks the interviewer.
"Oh, that," sighs the man. "Have you ever walked into a pharmacy, winking, and asked for aspirin?"
She needs larger breasts
A husband, tired of his wife asking him how she looks, buys her a full length mirror. This does little to help, as now she just stands in front of the mirror, looking at herself, asking him how she looks.
One day, fresh out of the shower, she is yet again in front of the mirror, now complaining that her breasts are too small. The husband comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper, and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper, and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. "How long will this take?" she asks.
"They'll grow slightly larger every day over a period of years," he replies.
The wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts grow over the years?"
The husband shrugs. "Why not, it worked for your butt, didn't it?"
telepathic watch
A rather confident young man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive young woman.
He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"
"No," he replies, "I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was testing it."
Intrigued, the woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"
"It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me," he explains.
"What's it telling you now?"
"Well, it says that you're not wearing any panties…"
The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken then, because I am wearing panties!"
The man exclaims, "Damn—it must be broken again. It's always running an hour fast!"
Ever been picked up by the fuzz?
Two prostitutes are standing on a corner. One says to the other, "Ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
The other replies, "No, but I've been swung around by the tits."


text:
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
The Fantasyland Story presenting Briefly Great Moments with Commander Lincoln attraction during construction
This leaving presentation tells the story of the Civil History Lesson in all its historically feathered glory. Featured in the presentation is the rotting story set to music, "Two Uncles." The climax comes with a climbing rendition of the Mississippi Address by a good replica of President Lincoln.
Run from Zombie Mode
© copyright 2011–2019
A Pants Aflame production


text: Grandpa Holgate Posted February 13, 2013 I hope this doesnt get deleted as it is a view from a paying customer And before the fan boys get their tounges brown!! UTTER GASH I pay for a game as it is advertised as being online fantastic, I buy it only for this and what do you know IT CRASHES, Crash crash crash Money back? Surely this is complete false advertising? Offering something and not delivering it? 0 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites


text:
Jum Thanana Malayalam Group Song Lyrics lyrics
Browse for Jum Thanana Malayalam Group Song Lyrics song lyrics by entered search phrase. Choose one of the browsed Jum Thanana Malayalam Group Song Lyrics lyrics, get the lyrics and watch the video.
There are 60 lyrics related to Jum Thanana Malayalam Group Song Lyrics.
Related artists: Group 1 crew, Group home, Carman lyrics, Belibers song, Brenda song, Eurovision song contest, Milka love song, New song
eopdago gogaereul dollyeodo geu dwit moseupdo dugeungeoryeo Uimi eopdaedo aljanha geuge ni maeryeok ingeoya Neoneun mwonga neomu dallayo neoneun mwonga neomu teullyeoyo Daechung geolchyeo ibeodo nune ttuijanha *jeomjeom jeomjeomjeom naraga jeomjeomjeom neoege ga Alsu
I feel like I know you based upon my observation MAXI PRIEST It's been a while you've been rocking my world SHAGGY Me an my friends been having private conversations MAXI PRIEST We've been calling you the bashment girl SHAGGY Though you may
ai crezut ca e de ajuns Jumatate din amor s-a dus Si astazi inca te mai port in gand Pozele cu tine-mi rad Iar eu in suflet plang Mi-ai dat numai jumatate Dragostea nu e asa... Trebuie sa crezi cu toata inima ta Nu voi mai privi inapoi Doar eu am crez
off the stage! Move! They don't want to hear you! They don't want to hear you! What, is that what you think? Is that what you think? Oi blud, calm, calm, calm Lyrics for lyrics, calm Yeah, hear me on the radio, wah gwan? See me on the TV, hi mum Murk MCs whe
t have no penpal to write to Don't have no Pentel to write with Don't have no pencil to bite through GROUP LIFE Recording - Mono - 4 Track - 8 Track - 16 - 24 Tours - Clubs - Vans - Crew - Rig - Heap Big Productions Holidays - Blackpool - Antigua - Villas - Weeke
Crusaders Ravage The Earth At Night Their Swords And Shields Hang To Their Side For The Battle They Had Forsaken For The Glory They Had Fortaken The King Rides Ahead Of The Group Homeward Bound He Marches His Troops For Fair Land France Lies In
Chorus:] If I'm dreaming don't wake me up if it's a lie don't tell me the truth 'Cause what the truth will do, it's gonna hurt my heart Being in the darkness for so long now Mr. President, did I hear you well Last night on TV You said: The group areas act is going Aparth
you want a song So you want a song A song just for you There are many melodies to choose from but there's only one of you So I'm gonna fly in the sky so high in the wind And I'm gonna try really really try so hard not to give in And find the song of you So I'm gonna run and hi
ll burn a hole right through this town. All the animals will feel this in their cages it'll mix with minerals and backbones to go home and reflect how they tore this building down you ask for more. It'll last past a century of soil Icarus will see it on his w
your life feels like it don't make sense And you think to yourself, 'I'm a good person' So why do these things keep happening? Why you gotta deal with them? You may be knocked down now but don't forget what He said, He said I won't give you more, more then you can t
Q-Tip] Lyrics to go (lyrics to go) uhh Lyrics to go (lyrics to go) ahh yeah, c'mon Lyrics to go (lyrics to go) Lyrics to go (lyrics to go) yeah yeah Lyrics to go (lyrics to go) Goin on and on to the rhythmic variation Wakin in the morning I still represent the nation When
to Death Song : I'll die alone but I don't know where I don't know when Probably before the end of that song I was wrong about everything I failed all my magic tricks My dreams are ghost of dreams I can't see them anymore I'll miss you and maybe I'll miss me but
The Happy Song Lyrics printer friendly version Oh I could sing an unending song Oh I could sing an unending song Of how You saved me soul Well I could dance a thousand miles Because of Your great love My heart is bursting, Lord To tell of all You've done Of how you ch
Intro:] Hey singer, mi yuh a call songwriter, eh? War teacher gal fighter Gunshotn write off yuh gang like paper from di typewriter Yuh boss mek yuh feel hyper But this rifle this sniper mek hollow tip blow like ten pied piper Bout man a traitor, oonu is a faker, l
VARIOUS YOUNG STUDENTS) My Mummy says I'm a miracle! My Daddy says I'm his special little guy! I am a Princess And I am a Prince Mum says I'm an angel Mum says I'm an angel Mum says I'm an angel (OLDER STUDENTS) So you think you're able (A-ble) To survive this me
are sorry but we are not allowed to post The Christmas Song lyrics by Brian McKnight either for privacy issues or copyright protection
like to go down to the church and drink some holy water but I don't like it... the priest don't like it but me can't seem to help it sail away - oh - away - oh you live me life free like a birdie cause me like to sing me likes what me do and me can't see
'95 is yours 2000 is mine And we're walking through the ghetto and the feelin' is fine (x2) Lil Dap: Before I wake up I thank the Lord for the day God bless the dead yo we came a long way Brothers just don't know how shit gots to go Yo check it where you're f
flask I drink of sober tea While relay cameras monitor me And the buzz surrounds it does Buzz surrounds Buzz surrounds Closed eyed sky wide open Unlimited girl unlimited sigh Elsewhere Indefinitely Far away Magnifies and deepens Ready
a dirty money track Yeah Girls kick the flow! Listen to me All my girls get ready We'll make it easy When I catch you picking me You better get a chill Boy you wanna take on me Cuz I'm your killing pill Can't you see the way I move My dress my flashy skin L
of you are starting to complain. Whats wrong guys? you think the songs all sound the same? Of coarse they sound the same, because they all sound BRUTAL
s go Waaa-yeaah! How about this one? How about this one? Rubber baby buggy bumpers, yeaah Rubber baby buggy bumpers... Yeaaah! How about this one? How about this one? Rubber baby buggy bumpers, yeaah Rubber baby... Rubbe
wants him he's so popular I wish you were him you're the next best thing you're the shadow of what I know I never gonna get when you say love, I hardly know the difference it's close enough I can forget the distance hey identical twin I know you won't be the
me a deal and make it good for me I won't get full of myself, 'cause i can't afford to be This is small town music, this is big town music He's ahead of his time you know but, he can't use it If only he could prove it Tomorrow's just a song away, a song away,
musics about Letting out what You want to get out Just let it flow Speaking grip rip rock Deeper than hip hop The music is within Like the way that they grimlock Compassion is a lost road No one's traveling down All we care about is gathering crowds To the studio with cases
my time is up I know you're gonna burn me Your judgment's coiled just Like a snake around my neck Oh my time is up I know you're gonna hang me And the noose is pulled so tight that it's hard for me to breathe Sing me this song of death Sing me this song of death Si
bit, twice shy Just the average kind of guy Loved and lost felt the pain The need to start all over again Heart broken, on the mend The loss of that special friend The look and feel of despair War and love where it's all fair You just want a place to h
song of the south Sweet potato pie and I shut my mouth Gone, gone with the wind There ain't nobody looking back again Cotton on the roadside, cotton in the ditch We all picked the cotton but we never got rich Daddy was a veteran, a southern democrat They oughta get a rich m
I try to find Words that wish to rhyme I will never write this song for her tonight We have stood alone We have walked alone Won't you help write this song for her tonight Help me write this song Help me write this song Help me write her song
up from another day I'm feeling so insane 'Cause ever since I saw your face I got it tattooed on my brain Did you know that you came and you got me like this 'Cause I know you're the one I wanna be with You gotta know that I'd do anything To get you to
my way to past a man's hollow Even though it was too soon And all the kings men say there's no tomorrow so I follow the sorrow song of the moon Scriptures singin' man I can't seem to find my way back home It's been a hundred years I've no idea whic
lie awake with open eyes My love just died I'm cold inside Can't face the thought to be alone All by myself on my own Loves come and gone I look around and see The hearts that still are broken I can't believe all of our hearts remain unopened We can't go
clouds along the blue horizon The sun is setting and the wind is dying down Outward bound, there is music all around Can you hear it, it's the song of the sea Soundings taken at the edge of darkness The widest silences the heart can ever hear You can stee
has more spirit than a bottle of vodka Many tried but no-one could stop her Panda eyes there from the start Big boots but a bigger heart So this is a song for Cathy Cathy was a friend of ours This is a song for Cathy A tragic end she didn't deserve No, she didn't deserve
up from another day I'm feeling so insane 'Cause ever since I saw your face I got it tattooed on my brain Did you know that you came and you got me like this 'Cause I know you're the one I wanna be with You gotta know that I'd do anything To get you to notice me What do I
time was left behind I made my way to the basic man assembly Music filled the air and voices sing Snd then the song became alive Stick hit the skin - i hit the stick And we've all been keeping time And all the boys been playing the drums Let's make our way to
ll buy a pair of jeans A stylish means A groovy masterpiece I'll cover them with paper men And books on zen Records shot with darts Talk your way out of this one - blah, blah, blah... I wrote a song for you I wrote a song for you I'll sleep til
met you on the palisades The sun was spilling kerosene And I was feeling wide awake Girl, you can be so obscene And when you sang a lullaby A missionary called your name You disappeared and hopped a flight For the Serengeti plain Tell everyone
This house and all these rooms Last Christmas or last year Out back the Dogwood blooms DIANA Do I really live here? DAN The paint, the walls All this glass and wood You don't recall? DIANA How I wish I could DAN Our house on Walton Way The house with the red d
you can see me now. If you can hear me now. So long, I will see you again. I dont know how, and I dont know when. But Ive seen this phase before. (Ah) Who knows what we leave behind? What we had is surely hard to resign. You keep me, I be coming back for more. You and me go back
sung blue Everybody knows one Song sung blue Every garden grows one Me and you are subject to the blues now and then But when you take the blues and make a song You sing them out again Sing them out again Song sung blue Weeping like a willow Song sung blue Sleeping on my pi
without warning The black of the morning All shimmery jewels From the voice of a fool Echoes through the halls Of the building He built in her place He'll shake through the winter And dream of her mister The picture he drew her Resembled her sis
If you want to write a song about the moon Walk along the craters of the afternoon When the shadows are deep and the light is alien And gravity leaps like a knife off the pavement And you want to write a song about the moon You want to write a spiritual tune Then n
this for what it's worth This song, my smile Now take this for what it's worth This song, my smile Smile I write to you from hell my song, leaving the foot against the gas And the wall that must have said your name Weaken me, for nothing you can say can stop this n
up so no one sees too much Separate the justice from the judged Turn it on and turn it up So I can't hear a goddamn thing Turn it on and turn it up So no one feels a goddamn thing Stealing today Buried the shame We can only be untamed This is the song for your
.. This one is for the mothers Who've lost a child This one is for the gypsies Who left their hearts behind This is for the strangers Sleeping in my heart Take what they want And leave while it's still dark No one is glamourously lonely All by themselv
Back when I was a baby, a baby saying his prayers, prayers soft and lonely, lonely all these days, days that meld into nothing, and nothing left for a boy but to hide his dreams away, hide all his dreams away Daisies after daisies, a daisy for your flo
sung blue, everybody knows one Song sung blue, every garden grows one Me and you are subject to The blues now and then But when you take the blues And make a song You sing 'em out again You sing 'em out again Song sung blue, weeping like a willow Song
dududu I beg you raise your water to the feet tonight. So I can dip my toes, and remember what it's like. Just feeling free and having all the time I need, this is why I sing the song to the sea. Dududu- dududud Du du duuu. This is why I, this is why I sing a
sung blue everybody knows one Song sung blue every garden grows on Me and you are subject to the blues now and then But when you take the blues and make a song you sing 'em out again You sing 'em out again Song sung blue weeping like a willow Song sung blue sleeping
light of day is fading, you're asleep beside me I'd give my life if you would stay But this is where you leave me, closing the door behind you Upon the secret of your day Song of the night I'm facing a night of loneliness Song of the night I'm lost in the emptines
say you got the answer for me, and that I, I need to listen to you, 'cause you know exactly what I should be, well I don't think so. babapapadaa You really do't have a clue, So get lost. [Chorus:] Here is a song for everyone. I wanna let
me a song and I'll dance for you And I won't mind what you're playing We must get high for a song dance tonight It's morning now I want to show you how Got to keep on moving, running to the sounds Well, I might not want you on my troubled times Strange things passing far behi
remember every place and everytime That I have sung for family and friends And the words have their reason and their rhyme When all the voices there are joining in And I stood there in the cold and in the rain And thought of how the water turned to w
are one of god's mistakes. You crying, tragic waste of skin. I'm well aware of how it aches. And you still won't let me in. Now I'm breaking down your door, To try and save your swollen face. Though I don't like you anymore You lying, trying waste of space. My oh my
yeah This could been about a lot of things But it's not so don't stop and try to look for the message The world moves and it don't ask why Your kids will burn red hot like the fourth of July I could told about what's in-between of the head and the hand But you wouldn
was winter on the Mersey snow was falling on New York the boats were coming in from Ireland a nation drinking round the docks what do you do when the rain is falling what do you do when the rain is falling down young men were heading back to
the wheel of torture Spin the rack of pain Now many souls will suffer To satisfy your game The smell of death surrounds you How can you hide your shame Can we stop this nightmare Before it starts again How can you sleep at night Can you hear their voices in your head We wrot
ve got a face not spoiled by beauty I have some scars from where I've been You've got eyes that can see right through me You're not afraid of anything they've seen I was told that I would feel Nothing the first time I don't know how these cuts heal But in you, I'v
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Pandan waffles originate from Vietnam and are characterized by the use of pandan flavoring and coconut milk in the batter.[79] The pandan flavoring results in the batter's distinctive spring green color.[80] When cooked, the waffle browns and crisps on the outside and stays green and chewy on the inside. Unlike most waffles, pandan waffles are typically eaten plain. In Vietnam they are relatively cheap and so are popular among children.[81] They are a popular street food made in either cast iron molds heated with charcoal or in electric waffle irons.[82]
What we liked: This compact and lightweight model from Black+Decker is a great multitasker for any small kitchen. It makes thin waffles with shallow wells, crispy on the outside and slightly chewy on the inside. On average, it makes waffles in about eight minutes—longer than ideal, but still respectable compared with other affordable options. The large surface makes four square four-inch waffles at a time, but it still has a low profile, making it a good fit in tight spaces. The plates on this unit are reversible, revealing a flat griddle, which opens up into a large cooking surface for eggs and pancakes and can accommodate large sandwiches with its adjustable hinge. The plates are removable and dishwasher-safe.
This Oster model made the most substantial waffles among the waffle makers we tested. About 1¼ inches thick, they looked like the kind you might get at a hotel brunch, puffy and evenly browned all over. Unfortunately, they were a bit dry and cakey, and none of our tasters liked them very much. The two sides cook quickly and then the waffle steams from the middle, creating a pronounced pale crevice where the waffle can be broken apart easily (good for sandwiches?).
In the late 14th century, the first known waffle recipe was penned in an anonymous manuscript, Le Ménagier de Paris, written by a husband as a set of instructions to his young wife.[16] While it technically contains four recipes, all are a variation of the first: Beat some eggs in a bowl, season with salt and add wine. Toss in some flour, and mix. Then fill, little by little, two irons at a time with as much of the paste as a slice of cheese is large. Then close the iron and cook both sides. If the dough does not detach easily from the iron, coat it first with a piece of cloth that has been soaked in oil or grease.[17] The other three variations explain how cheese is to be placed in between two layers of batter, grated and mixed in to the batter, or left out, along with the eggs.[18] However, this was a waffle / gaufre in name only, as the recipe contained no leavening.
Imagine tasting fluffy, Belgian-style waffles for breakfast every morning. Then, imagine the satisfaction of being able to make a vanilla waffle one day and add nuts, fruit or even dessert toppings to your batter on the next. Now, envision this breakfast experience with no mess and effortless cleanup. You can stop dreaming and wake up, the Hamilton Beach® Flip Belgian Waffle Maker is in the kitchen and expecting you for breakfast.
What we liked: The All-Clad is well built and sturdy, and heats up quickly and evenly for perfectly crisp, light, and consistent waffles. The crunchy, golden waffles made with this model are tall and square, with deep nooks. The All-Clad makes two waffles at a time in under four minutes and reheats fast, requiring just two minutes between batches. It browns evenly along the surface and between the top and the bottom of the waffle, even without a flip mechanism. A drip tray is fitted to the back of the unit to contain spills for easy cleanup. This unit is also compact, as it's equipped with cord storage and locking handles.
If you have tried our hugely popular Keto Pancake Recipe before, this recipe is very similar. You could make this with 1 & 1/2 Cups of Almond Flour instead if you prefer, but we figured for this recipe we would feature Coconut Flour and also flavor these a little differently. This produces a thicker batter, which makes the waffles very fluffy and full too. If you follow the recipe as written you should get 3 Full-size Belgian Waffles out of it, depending of course on the size of your waffle maker at home.
That non-stick coating and oil combo not only results in pretty waffles on your plate, it also means cleanup is a snap because you won't have to scrub bits of stuck waffle out of the grids. Some electric waffle makers have removable plates that can be tossed in the sink or dishwasher. If you're dealing with an electric waffle maker that doesn't have removable grids, you can't dunk the whole thing for a good cleaning -- so a soft-bristle toothbrush or damp rag are your best cleaning options.
No, this waffle maker cannot compete with the All-Clad, but at about a quarter of the price, the Krups sure gives it a respectable run for its money. The build isn't as solid—there's some plastic, no 18/10 stainless here—but like the All-Clad, it is generously proportioned to yield four tall, deeply grooved Belgian-style waffles per batch and, with an adjustable dial for cook control and an audible chime that signals doneness, it doesn't skimp on extra features. It does best the All-Clad in one regard: its non-stick plates not only release cooked waffles easily, they pop out for easy cleaning and are dishwasher safe. That's a game changer right there.
FABULOUS! The coconut oil was a great addition. Only word of warning is remember to take the rest of the rest of the waffles out of the oven. [heated to 350, then off. I made a double batch. The 3 of us taste tested the first 2. Made the remainder, putting them in the oven till completed. I didn't remember there were more waffles left in the oven till doing the dishes. This for sure is replacing the recipe I used for 25 years.
The instructions say to warm up the waffle iron on heat setting 7, but there is no heat setting 7. The waffle iron has a knob on top numbered 1 through 6. I can't actually rotate the knob to numbers 5 and 6 though; the knob is physically stopped from rotating at 4. When I rotate the knob the other direction, I can rotate past 1 almost a full 360 degrees (stopping just before I reach 6 from the opposite side). The iron seems to heat up as soon as it's plugged in regardless of how the knob is rotated, so as far as I can tell there is no "off" setting even if I've rotated the knob to well below 1. Since I can't tell how the knob actually maps to heat settings (if the knob even does anything at all) I'm afraid to even try actually poring waffle batter onto the thing..
There are countless styles of waffles, including the light and crisp Italian gofri, the sugar-speckled Belgian liège, and the charming, heart-shaped Scandinavian vafler. For our testing we decided to limit ourselves to the two most common waffle styles in the United States, broadly divided into the "American" and "Belgian" categories. Although there are dozens of varieties of "Belgian" waffles alone, for marketing purposes, thicker waffles with deeper wells are considered Belgian, while shallow, thinner ones are categorized as American or "regular." Both American and Belgian waffles can be made in either a circle or a square shape, so it's up to you to decide which form is more waffle-y to you.
have been making the same quick waffle recipe that came with the vintantonio belgian waffle maker I bought over 25 years ago. The recipe is good but has a whole stick of butter in it and it means taking out the kitchenaid. I'm all for simple. Of course in my world, waffles still and will always needs butter ON it as well as pure maple syrup [I do take a small bottle of the stuff to restaurants when going out for breakfast.] Still, I'm so ready for something new. Scouring the internet, this one speaks to me. Having always used real butter, will use coconut oil. True to form, I'll 'experiment' on company this weekend. Thanks
Turn your favorite waffle recipe into a bowl in just minutes. Whether you fill your bowl up with fruit and yogurt or even ice-cream with whipped cream this Waffle Bowl Maker simplifies your life in the kitchen. It makes two bowls at a time so you can mix and match. From breakfast to dessert the non-stick coated plates makes baking waffle bowls easy and fun.
I really would like to give this place better reviews, but the service is SO BAD. I came twice, once during lunch and again during breakfast (but early, so it wasn't even crowded). Both times I sat outside, and both times the service was inexcusably bad. At breakfast, my husband never got a refill on his coffee. Both times I sat for so long that I wasn't sure if I was supposed to get up to place my order at the counter (I wasn't).
The Black+Decker Removable Plate Waffle Maker (WM700R) is a new model for 2016. You can take the plates out for washing, which is a huge plus, but unfortunately this machine fell short in several other ways during our testing. The indicator lights don't tell you when a waffle is done, and it has no browning control. Plus, our waffles came out bready rather than crisp, and after a few rounds of baking, the handle got uncomfortably hot.
The Oster Flip Nonstick Belgian Waffle Maker nearly made it to the winners' list. Its design is similar to that of the Hamilton Beach, featuring a drip tray for easy cleanup and a folding handle for compact storage. The waffles it produced were evenly browned, but, once again, they required too much time to cook, resulting in dense and soggy waffles.
Service: 5 stars. The host staff and waitstaff were VERY friendly and made it all work. On of our party couldn't decide what to order after everyone else did. Our server put the order in and my biggest pet peeve at a restaurant is someone's food finally coming out after everyone else is finish eating. But alas that did not happen. Our server made it happen and all of our food came out together, very quickly I might add.
If you prefer a thick Belgian waffle over the thin American-style ones produced by the Cuisinart WMR-CA, but don't have either the money or the space for our top pick from Krups, the compact Hamilton Beach Belgian Style Waffle Maker (26009) is your best bet. In make, it actually looks similar to our previous top pick, the discontinued Proctor Silex 26016A, offering the same handle and locking system, as well as the same slider for browning control.
"... No appetites are safe from the magnificent Southern Creole cuisine when visiting Wells restaurant, located uptown in the Big Apple. Famous for more than their chicken and waffles, Wells entertains customers with Caribbean flair and a frenzy of live music. Harlem hasn't been the same since Wells opened in May 1938. The owner, Elizabeth Wells, is determined to bring people a humble, homey atmosphere with exciting home-style cooking, but with a twist of island flavor and a lot of fun. Joseph T. Wells, the late husband of Wells, had a record of cooking techniques in the mix. Working as a waiter and manager of a restaurant in Florida, Joseph took his craft to New York during the late 1920s. It was inevitable for the young entrepreneur to start his business and, by the spring of 1938, the restaurant bearing his name opened its doors. Elizabeth Wells entered the picture later. They married in 1966, even though she had joined the establishment in 1963. The married couple produced a son named Tommy Wells. With an avalanche of victory for the restaurant, Wells bloomed as one of the greatest hot spots in Harlem, with a bevy of entertainers who dropped in...Wells has been spinning the wheels of the restaurant with tip-top soul food and no regrets..."


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Published at Saturday, 13 October 2018. Table Furniture. By Lucien Chevotet.
When we talk about table one thing that comes to our mind is the centre or coffee buffet. It is generally placed in the centre of the sitting arrangement of the living room. Great care should be taken in selecting the centre table as the glass top is more popular than the wooden top. It should have shelf just below the top for keeping the magazines or the newspapers. The purpose of keeping it in the centre is to keep the teapots, saucers, telephone or specs etc. They come in different shapes but the round or rectangular shapes are the evergreen and universal choice.
Even if you have more floor space, you don't want to fill it all up with just a few pieces of furniture. Therefore having smaller tables used as accents throughout the room you will be able to keep that nice large floor plan that you have and not make it seem smaller than it is.
Decoration has a new meaning when used in context to furniture. Sometimes an addition of new furniture in the already decorated interiors give a new and changed look to the interiors. Furniture plays a very important role in designing the interiors of a home, office, school or a hotel. When we talk of tables there is not just one design available. They come in various sizes and used for many purposes. Let us examine the kinds and uses of different types of tables.
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text:
- HelperChoice
- Domestic helpers
- Domestic helper Jobs in Hong Kong
Looking after for elderly - HelperChoice
L J., Employer looking for a domestic helper in Hong Kong
Updated on: 28/01/2019
Contact L
Looking after for elderly
We are a family of 4 (including 2 adult and 2 elderly.) We live in Lok Fu. The main duties include 1 elderly caring, cooking (Chinese), routine household duties (e.g. cleaning, laundry). We will not consider anyone who is dishonest and who is taking out loans.
We treat our helper with respect and are looking for a long-term relationship. Starting in March 2019.
Location: Lok Fu
Family Members:
- 2 adults aged around 35
- 2 elderly aged around 65 - 75 (one of which suffer mild strokes recently)
Main duties:
- Take care 1 elderly which suffer mild strokes recently
- Cooking (Chinese)
-Routine household duties (e.g. cleaning, laundry)
Looking for the following:
-Caring, honest and reliable
-Clean and hygiene
- Experience with taking care elderly is preferable
- Past employer references is a must
- Non-smoking
- Able to work independently with limited instruction
- Can communicate with Cantonese
We can ONLY consider FINISHED contract. And we MUST be able to speak to your current or one of your past employers for direct reference to consider.
Those who have no reference need not apply.
Start date01/03/2019
Monthly salary4600 HKD
Housing:Live in
Arrangement:Private room
Day off on:Sunday
Flat size:400 square feet
Expected duties
Approximate location.


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By Jett Alcock at September 09 2018 09:46:56
So here's a mind-blowingly simple technique to get your ex back: make it look as if you don't care anymore! You see, if you appear too desperate to get your ex back, you put them in the power position. You put them on a pedestal so high and mighty that no one else can touch it. This gives them a tremendous amount of power over you. It gives them a tremendous feeling of overblown self importance. Dale Carnegie once wrote that the most fundamental desire of humans is the desire to feel imported. It is what separates us from the animals. But by making another person feel too important, you can turn them into a tyrant. You feed their ego so much that it becomes overblown. It swells up like a giant hot air balloon!
That is, they are increasingly becoming part of the basic circuitry of computers or are easily attached adjuncts, as well as standing alone in special devices such as office payroll machines. Many different applications algorithms are now available, and highly advanced systems such as artificial intelligence algorithms may become common in the future. Artificial Intelligence (AI), a term that in its broadest sense would indicate the ability of an artifact to perform the same kinds of functions that characterize human thought.
The possibility of developing some such artifact has intrigued human beings since ancient times. With the growth of modern science, the search for AI has taken two major directions: psychological and physiological research into the nature of human thought, and the technological development of increasingly sophisticated computing systems. In the latter sense, the term AI has been applied to computer systems and programs capable of performing tasks more complex than straightforward programming, although still far from the realm of actual thought. The most important fields of research in this area are information processing, pattern recognition, game-playing computers, and applied fields such as medical diagnosis.
Multiple inputs to the process exist : Some of them would be competition, lifecycle stage of the market, brand image, budget, etc... ; Complex decisions are made : There are many possible ways to achieve the process objectives (reach planned sales, leverage brand image, etc...) ; Each decision implies different levels of risk and potential benefits : It is the responsibility of the worker to choose the best one (low price strategy, aggressive advertising campaign, etc...) ; There are three main characteristics that make knowledge processes different from highly structured processes: Focus is on communication instead of automation.
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The Gas Pipe
Listed in:(512) 472-4774
701 E 5th St
Austin, TX 78701
- Arts and Entertainment in Austin
- Smoking in Austin
701 E 5th St
Austin, TX 78701
general information
Current categorization of The Gas Pipe is under Arts and Entertainment , Smoking with the location in the city of Austin, TX . The Gas Pipe's business owner has an option to edit The Gas Pipe business listing info to promote and describe goods and service to E 5th St Austin consumers.
The Gas Pipe has been reviewed 0 times. All Austin-people are welcome to review and share their positive and negative experience with The Gas Pipe in Austin, TX which promotes following services: Austin Arts and Entertainment , Austin Smoking
The Gas Pipe was rated as Good. A local Austin Forum is currently looked at by 8 internet users. Specifically, The Gas Pipe accepted 21 comments in a previous month! Become closer with the Austin people.
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Illness: If a child is sent home with a fever, that child may not return to school until he/she has been fever free without medication for 24 hours.
Safety is a great concern at Nashold. In the event of an accident, the school nurse or member of the faculty will administer first aid. If it is determined that EMS personnel is needed immediately the school will request an ambulance at their discretion. A parent or emergency contact will be notified immediately.
Verace is among more than 3,500 winners of National Merit Scholarships financed by U.S. colleges and universities.
Rockford Public Schools have established an exclusion date as the first day of school in order to meet the requirements for health examinations and immunizations.
There are limited openings and waitlist spots for the Creative and Performing Arts program.
Rockford School Board member Jaime Escobedo submitted his resignation from the board effective Wednesday, May 29.
501 7th St., Rockford, IL 61104
M-F 8 a.m. - 4:30 p.m.
Rockford Public Schools ©Copyright 2019. All Rights Reserved.


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Just add and cup oil to sny cake mix and you have cookie dough!
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How to improve reading speed 1000 Life Hacks
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When trying to look for percentages, drop the digit of the number and multiple by the digit of the % - math life hack


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It's been a while since Veena Malik hogged the media limelight. She's back, as everybody associated with the world of showbiz now knows, and will be hosting a reality TV talent show in which contestants will be judged on their acting, dancing and singing skills.
Perhaps the more interesting thing is the line-up of judges. They are: Javed Sheikh, Kubra Khan and Hamza Ali Abbasi. Hmmm … looking at the adjudicators and their body of work, we think Veena M could also have been one of them.


text:
Agape: In Search of Universal Love
from the novel, The Lodging for the Rose
Rolf. A. F. Witzsche
Story 2a - In the Brilliance of a Night
"Certainly, they didn't aim to protect the woman," I replied. "They wanted to kill her. Nor would her husband and family have benefited by her death, as they would have suffered a great loss. Nor would society have benefited from it," I said to
Steve. "Society doesn't benefit from murdering one another. I suppose, only the scribes and the Pharisees stood to benefit by it."
|| - page index - || - chapter index - || - download - || - Exit - ||
(c) Copyright 1998 -
Rolf Witzsche
Published by Cygni Communications Ltd. North Vancouver, Canada


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Travel agents earned a national median wage of 36,460 in 2016. This company will also pay for your background check. Yes, Its possible for this you've to intimate as in advance before starting of the next Job work. Their website does not mention a charge if a check is conducted, but feel free to correct me if there is one. Sitel Work at Home Read Sitel Review They hire work from home call center agents. There are no fees associated with applying. The traffic is Direct and 100 Adsense safe. Transcom Read Transcom Review This company hires work at home call center agents. HSN Read HSN Review Home Shopping Network. Freelance Writer, more than ever, writers are needed to formulate news articles, create content, and come top 5 work from home jobs in india up with the creative ideas that fill the pages of nearly every site on the Internet. We want to first Thank you for coming to this site.
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TLR 22 4.0 and 5.0 both ARTR
Tech Elite
Thread Starter
TLR 22 4.0 and 5.0 both ARTR
2 TLR 22s up for sale. Both are setup for carpet with gear diffs but including ball diffs too.
First up is a heavily upgraded TLR 22 4.0. Has a Hobbywing just stock esc, Spektrum s6240 servo, Trinity 24k 13.5, and lipo factory lipo (slight puff). Has titanium turnbuckles all around, front and rear aluminum camber mount, all 3 brass chassis weights, and aluminum servo mounts. Comes with a body. Set of carpet tires, and a bag of spares. Gear diff installed but also includes a ball diff. (Receiver not included ). $300 plus shipping.
Next is a 22 5.0 also set up for carpet. Has an Orion r10.1 esc, Spektrum 6240rx (can swap servo if you dont have a compatible Spektrum transmitter), trinity monster max 8.5, and trinity white carbon lipo. This also has lots of upgrades. Carbon towers, front and rear sway bars, brass chassis weight, aluminum steering rack, and rear aluminum camber mount. Gear diff installed but a ball diff is also included. Comes with a new clear body, set of carpet tires (not pictured, and a bag of spares. $450 plus shipping
No trades please
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~ Lake on the Trail OR topo map, 1:24000 scale, 7.5 X 7.5 Minute, Current, 2014
Lake on the Trail, Oregon, USGS topographic map dated 2014.
Includes geographic coordinates (latitude and longitude). This topographic map is suitable for hiking, camping, and exploring, or framing it as a wall map.
Printed on-demand using high resolution imagery, on heavy weight and acid free paper, or alternatively on a variety of synthetic materials.
Topos available on paper, Waterproof, Poly, or Tyvek. Usually shipping rolled, unless combined with other folded maps in one order.
- Product Number: USGS-7260972
- Free digital map download (high-resolution, GeoPDF): Lake on the Trail, Oregon (file size: 28 MB)
- Map Size: please refer to the dimensions of the GeoPDF map above
- Weight (paper map): ca. 55 grams
- Map Type: POD USGS Topographic Map
- Map Series: US Topo
- Map Verison: Current
- Cell ID: 24596
- Datum: North American Datum of 1983
- Map Projection: Transverse Mercator
- Map Cell Name: Lake on the Trail
- Grid size: 7.5 X 7.5 Minute
- Date on map: 2014
- Map Scale: 1:24000
- Geographical region: Oregon, United States
Neighboring Maps:
All neighboring USGS topo maps are available for sale online at a variety of scales.
Spatial coverage:
Topo map Lake on the Trail, Oregon, covers the geographical area associated the following places:
- Wilson Creek - Black Canyon
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- Northern map edge Latitude: 43.375
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Related Maps
~ Eckley NE CO topo map, 1:24000 scale, 7.5 X 7.5 Minute, Current, 2016
~ Woodland MI topo map, 1:24000 scale, 7.5 X 7.5 Minute, Current, 2016
~ Athens WV topo map, 1:24000 scale, 7.5 X 7.5 Minute, Current, 2016
~ New Brunswick NJ topo map, 1:24000 scale, 7.5 X 7.5 Minute, Current, 2016


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When the value can not be attained using this method, or is turned down by Customs, among the list of other strategies is to be used, in descending purchase:
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Meals products and solutions; health and wonder solutions; ceramics; sanitary ware; switches and plugs; design resources; batteries; and paper.
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100 Beeswax Ear Candles Nz Percent Uk
|Include In Article
100 Percent Beeswax Candles
|Published Date
|Wednesday , January 02nd , 2019 - 08:57:48 AM
|Uploaded By
|Azurine Meyer
Candle Stick. Wednesday , January 02nd , 2019 - 08:57:48 AM.
Quote from 100 Percent Beeswax Candles :
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Besides being a terrific alternative for home decor, chandeliers may also be a superb focus for those visitors. Three dimensional chandeliers are a favorite pick for party decorations.
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