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BA district eyes bond for buildings
Published 8:00 pm, Wednesday, July 28, 2004
At a working school board meeting Tuesday, board members and administration reviewed a to-do list of items that have been identified as necessities for the elementary, intermediate, junior high, high school, and the administration building. Chip Hendrick of R.C. Hendrick & Son, Inc., who also attended the meeting, previously had gone through each building and determined what was needed. For each building, sitework, architectural, mechanical, electrical, and technology needs were listed and provided for board members and staff. The suggested projects added up to the following estimated costs: $233,765 for the administration building; $1.9 million for the elementary building; $2.4 million for the junior high; $1.09 million for the intermediate school; and $1.5 million for the high school. The junior high needs the most work.
The buildings need work, Superintendent Jim Wencel said, because they're aging. He said rather than wait until the buildings are in really rough shape, he'd like the district to be proactive and begin the process of doing the upgrades and improvements soon.
Another item discussed was an auditorium at the high school. The proposed auditorium would have 450 seats and be 12,500 square feet, similar to the size of the Unionville-Sebewaing Area School District auditorium recently built. The estimated cost would be $3.4 million. Wencel said he's heard comments from community members that the school district should have an auditorium for various school groups. Currently, the high school has a stage in the cafetorium.
"The auditorium would be nice to have, but it's not a dire need," Wencel said. "The rest (of the list) are needs."
In the past, bond requests for an auditorium have been defeated at the polls. Wencel said in 1992, an auditorium was included in the package with the high school and the district was asking for almost $10 million for both, with the auditorium taking up about $500,000 of the total. That measure was defeated. In 1993, the district went for the bond again, but separated the auditorium and the high school on the ballot Ñ $9.38 million for the high school and various renovations and $915,000 for the auditorium. The high school bond issue passed and the auditorium issue was defeated. In 2001, the district went for another bond for the auditorium, and this proposed auditorium was somewhat larger than the auditorium proposed in previous years. The district requested $3.5 million for the auditorium, and it was defeated.
The last bond that successfully passed was the $9.38 million bond passed in 1993. Originally, 4.82 mills were levied on that bond. Currently, 3.83 mills are being levied. The amount has decreased because the taxable value has increased.
To pay for the proposed renovations and auditorium, Wencel said very little would come from the fund balance. He said this is because the state is not increasing the per-pupil allowance as it has in previous years, and it looks like the state won't be increasing that allowance for another several years. In addition, expenses keep increasing for the district, and student enrollment numbers aren't where they used to be years ago. Because of these factors, the fund balance has decreased from $3.45 million in 2002-03 to $3.35 million for 2003-04. The proposed 2004-05 budget includes a fund balance of $2.54 million.
Wencel said while the district has been fiscally responsible and has held back on major purchases and renovations, the district can't afford to wait much longer to make the needed renovations.
As for grants, Wencel said the district is "pursuing every grant we can in the area of technology."
Wencel suggested going for a bond, which would have to be approved by the school district voters. He said the ballot could include two bond issues - one for the renovations and one for the auditorium. However, he said the auditorium may not be pursued at this time because it's more of a want than a need.
While the amount of the bond request is not certain at this time, Wencel said the goal would be to bring in about $6 million for renovations. If the auditorium bond would be on the ballot, the requested amount would be $3.4 million. The bond may be added onto the high school bond already in place and refinanced, or it could be a separate bond. The bond request, if approved, could take the current 3.83 millage back up to the 4.82 mills levied previously, or perhaps a little bit more.
An election to request the bond could be conducted in either February or August 2005, Wencel said. This would coincide with the new school election laws.
Wencel said the taxable value of all taxable property in the district, determined by the county, has increased by 10 percent, or $18 million, from the previous year. Wencel said he did not anticipate such an increase; if he had, he would've suggested taking the bond issue to the voters sooner.
The next step, Wencel said, is to contact architect firms. Future working board meetings will be conducted and community members will be encouraged to attend and provide input on what they believe is important for the district. Wencel said a survey likely will be conducted to gauge the amount of tax support the voters are willing to give the district. Tours of the schools could be conducted to show people what renovations need to be done, he said.
"(In order for this bond to pass), we need to explain to the voters why we need the things we need (and) to show that we'd spend the money wisely," Wencel said. "We need to make it affordable for them."


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ECOLE and the McGill Office of Sustainability Present: Designing Sustainability in Innovation!
McGill Reporter | October 25, 2016
by: Toby Davine
Are you passionate about sustainability? Are you interested in how your university is currently addressing sustainability and climate change?/sustainabilityCategory: Sustainability
Thinking of a way to make McGill a better place?
Join us on the last Friday of each month for Sustainability Fridays: an event for individuals in the McGill community to gather, unwind, and discuss sustainability at McGill.
Want to learn more about sustainable construction and development practices?/sustainabilityCategory: Sustainability

subset: commoncrawl


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Clifford 24 Sep 1901 - 09 May 1966
Lucy 09 Sep 1905 - 23 Oct 1983
Clifford's parents were Henry and Lillie Tyler Crews
Contributed on 11/9/08 by denise.bratcher63
Email This Contributor
Record #: 97557
On this site you can upload gravestone photos, locate ancestors and perform genealogy research. If you have a relative buried in Arkansas, we encourage you to upload a digital image using our Submit a Photo page. Contributing to this genealogy archive helps family historians and genealogy researchers locate their relatives and complete their family tree.
Submitted: 11/9/08 • Approved: 11/9/08 • Last Updated: 8/13/12 • R97557-G92382-S3


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Jermaine Dupree once described Jagged Edge as 'if DMX was singing to a girl.' Well, unbeknownst to him, X sang to girls all the time. Well, not as much as he shouted and barked at them, but the comparison wasn't lost on real G's who looked to the Atlanta quartet to voice their heart's flutterings and frustrations. The last we heard from the four, they were putting new music together sans former collaborator Dupree, and were far from finished leaving their mark. Now we have music to prove it. "Full Time Lover" could be the group shaking the rust off, but "Moments In Love" is that southern boy charm shot into outer-space by way of the Art Of Noise's Pure Moods stalwart of the same name. Not sure about the Trina inclusion (old friends maybe?), but we'll take a Gucci Mane feature over Lil Bow Wow any day.
Download: Jagged Edge, "Full Time Lover"
Download: Jagged Edge f. Trina & Gucci Mane, "Moments in Love"


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Steve Coogan jokes about Cobain
- Bang Showbiz
- 13 February 2009
Steve Coogan has caused outrage by poking fun at Kurt Cobain's suicide when quizzed on his relationship with the Nirvana singer's widow Courtney Love
Steve Coogan has caused outrage by poking fun at the late Kurt Cobain.
The British comic star appeared to reference the former Nirvana frontman - who shot himself in 1994 - when asked about his previous relationship with Kurt's widow Courtney Love.
When 'The Late Late Show' host Craig Ferguson mentioned the Hole singer, Steve put two fingers in his mouth and shouted: "If I had a gun now, I would just put it in my mouth."
The talk show host then asked his guest - who dated Courtney for a few weeks in 2005 - about the rumours the singer is now dating 'The Wrestler' actor Mickey Rourke.
Steve replied: "You're serious? I'm getting the next flight out of here tonight."
After they split, Courtney and Steve engaged in a bitter war of words when he denied getting her pregnant.
Although the pair are yet to resolve their differences, Steve may be unable to avoid his ex-lover as she recently revealed she is planning to move to the UK.
Courtney, 44, said: "Buckinghamshire is where I want to go. I read Country Life magazine every week. I'm fed up with Los Angeles. It's full of crazy people.
"People criticise Britain but it's still a cleaner, safer place to live than Hollywood."


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Editor's Note – Awareness of autism's behaviors comforting
By Robyn email@example.com
It has been nearly eight years since the autism earthquake rocked our world.Our youngest son, Avery, had just celebrated his fourth birthday. He was a beautiful, fun-loving child, but everyone who met him knew he was a little different.
More: continued here


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by HELEN GEIB
Gamer is a better movie than the recent Death Race, but not so much better that the comparison does not come readily to mind. And that's not a good thing.
The film is set in a dystopian, not too far in the future America and revolves around a bloodsport called "Slayers." Death row inmates are given guns with live ammunition, set down in a mock urban-wasteland controlled environment, and told to shoot their way to the designated safe point if they want to live. Survive 30 trips and you win a get out of jail free card. The "star" of the game is Kable (Gerard Butler): ex-soldier, a variant on the wrongfully convicted innocent man, devoted husband and father, targeted for elimination by the powers that be, and determined to escape.
The clever conceit of Gamer is that "Slayers" is a combat video game made real. The game's players on the outside control the every movement of the marionette-killers on the inside. It's survival of the fittest, but the people being judged are not the ones who pay the price of failure (or of a success built on mass murder). Meanwhile the show is broadcast live for the pleasure of the teeming masses. While "Slayers" provides the violence, "Society" provides the sex. "Society" is the ugly-future version of Second Life, in which players turn their fellow-human-being avatars into sideshow freaks and whores. Kable's wife Angie (Amber Valletta) is one of its mannequin-victims.
The actors have little to work with, although Butler nevertheless brings his characteristic intensity to the hero's part. The one-dimensional characters are either overly familiar genre types or gaming-culture caricatures. The former includes Kable and his wife, the crusading members of resistance movement Humanz, and the film's villain Castle (Michael C. Hall), the evil genius inventor of the implant technology and corporate titan behind the commercial exploitation of the games. The latter includes Kable and Angie's operators.
Despite being only about 90 minutes, Gamer feels really underwritten, and the weak characterization is especially problematic. The story creates some potentially interesting character dynamics; for example, the relationship between Kable and his teenage operator that fluctuates repeatedly from antagonistic to cooperative. Like other character-based aspects of the film, this relationship languishes undeveloped, its dramatic and comic potential largely unexploited.
Gamer scavenges characters, themes, and plot points from a number of other films, among other popular culture sources. Many of those characters, themes, and plot points are good movie material, but this particular movie doesn't do enough with any of them. The script tosses around a lot of sound bytes about free will, the dark side of technology and underbelly of capitalistic society, exploitation of the powerless, and the like while the camera lingers on bloodied corpses and the naked flesh of degraded women. I could overlook the superficiality, but not the clunky exposition or the fact that the pseudo-intellectuality gets in the way of what works about the movie: the action and the dark comedy. The best parts of Gamer are the pulse-pounding action sequences in and out of the game environments and the unoriginal, but still corrosive satire of contemporary media and consumer culture.
The film was written and directed by Brian Taylor and Mark Neveldine (or as they credit themselves, directed by Taylor/Neveldine and written by Taylor & Neveldine), the duo responsible for the improbably entertaining Crank. That film had manic energy and a simple, unpretentious clothesline plot. This film needed more of the first quality. It might well have been more successful if it had also mirrored the second by adopting a more straightforward surviving-the-game-then-taking-out-the-bad-guy plot. Gamer has some real entertainment value, but it doesn't know well enough to stick to what it does best.
2 stars


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The Looming Tower
(Literary Masterpieces, Volume 4)
Lawrence Wright's The Looming Tower is a masterful account of the events that culminated in al-Qaeda's terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. To relate the story as fully as possible, the author, in addition to using available published sources, interviewed over five hundred people. Wright readily admits that The Looming Tower is not the final accounting. At the time of writing, Osama bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahiri, al-Qaeda's leaders, were in hiding, and the principal governments involved, notably Saudi Arabia and the United States, had information that has not been made available to Wright or any other investigator of the events of 9/11.
The title The Looming Tower comes from the Qurՙn. After the terrorist attack, in a tape belonging to a member of an al-Qaeda cell, bin Laden urged the future highjackers to embrace martyrdom and recited a passage from the Qurՙn's fourth sura: "Wherever you are, death will find you,/ even in the looming tower." In 1996 Osama bin Laden, a Saudi Arabian, openly declared war on the United States. Until then American authorities had largely ignored him, and there was only one FBI agent assigned to the bin Laden threat prior to that year. Hardly anyone in the American government took him seriously.
Wright begins his narrative with Salyyid Qutb, an Egyptian educator who visited the United States in 1948. He became convinced that there was a clash of civilizations between Islam and materialistic cultures, both capitalist and communist. Even contemporary Islam was straying, and Qutb envisioned a restoration of a purer Islam, the Islam of the Prophet Muhammed, who died in 632 c.e. Wright refers to this attitude as the "paradise lost" syndrome. Convicted of involvement in plots against the secular Egyptian government of Gamal Abdul Nasser, Qutb was executed in 1966, but he was an inspiration for later al-Qaeda terrorists, notably Ayman al-Zawahiri, a middle-class Egyptian doctor. In the aftermath of the assassination of Egypt's Anwar Sadat in 1981, al-Zawahiri and others were imprisoned and tortured.
After the Soviets invaded Afghanistan in 1979, Wright reports, many Muslims believed that fighting the Soviets was a religious jihad sanctioned by the Qurՙn. Osama bin Laden, one of fifty-four siblings, was the son of a wealthy contractor for the ruling family of Saudi Arabia. While in college he was influenced by the writings of Sayyid Qutb. Bin Laden was an early supporter of the jihad against the Soviets, raising funds even from the Saudi royal family. Ironically, given what was to transpire, the Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan administrations contributed weapons to the fight against the Soviets, a classic example of unintended consequences inasmuch as many of those armed Muslims would become al-Qaeda adherents. In 1986 bin Laden and his family moved to Pakistan, where he became head of a small Arab brigade. Zawahiri also relocated to Pakistan, resuming an earlier relationship with bin Laden. They complemented each other perfectly. Bin Laden had the money and the idealism, Zawahiri had the experience and was a brilliant propagandist. The result was a commitment to global jihad, not just against the Soviets. The goal was to restore the unity of Islam under religious leadership from Spain across Asia to the Philippines. Al-Qaeda was founded in 1988, but bin Laden and Zawahiri had not yet focused on the United States as the principal target.
Wright goes on to discuss the problematic relationship bin Laden had with the Saudi royal family. Although of the puritanical Wahhabi Islam sect, the Saudi royals were widely criticized for their spendthrift habits and playboy activities, and bin Laden became a rallying point against the regime's materialism. Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein's invasion of Kuwait in 1990 created other complications. The royal family was divided on allowing Saudi Arabia to be used by the United States as a staging area in the Gulf War, while bin Laden adamantly opposed any American presence. After radical Muslims came to power in the Sudan, bin Laden moved to Khartoum in 1992. By then America had become the primary enemy, the personification of Christendom and the eternal enemy of Islam. Wright argues that bin Laden and al-Qaeda had little in the way of a political program other than a purified Islam to be achieved through jihad. Bin Laden, believing that America was a toothless tiger, found an example in Somalia, where in the aftermath of the downing of two United States helicopters, President Bill Clinton withdrew Americans from that country.
Because of bin Laden's support of jihad, his Saudi...
(The entire section is 1910 words.)


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pet birthday party
Pet Birthday: Here's Something To Take The Cake!
We like to celebrate our birthdays, and pet birthdays are a special occasion too. Have you wanted to have a pet birthday party, but are at a loss on what to do about a cake? I've found something that just might fit the bill! Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. We receive a small commission […]Continue Reading
June 9, 2017 No comments


text: Todd, Let me follow this up real quick with something Jason pointed out to a lot of us. No one is really commenting on the overall concept of the new toolchain builds much except to criticize (where I'm just as bad). The concept behind all of this (the cross tools, the internally self managing build process, etc) is very cool. I love the ability to cross build everything from one place with easy support. I think folks are just getting frustrated when the collatoral damage is leaking hard around the edges in places. (I know that's my take on things). But, also take it with a grain of salt when someone commits stuff that fixes the immediate "it doesn't build for me" rather than worrying about the long term asthetics in some areas. Anyways, great stuff here (it sure made upgrading my macpcc from 1.5.2 to -current a snap in the end). James >>: I can agree this should be better laid out long term, but opening everyone >>: who builds trees right now up to these pitfalls rather than doing it after >>: those Makefiles are fixed makes no sense. >> >>I can't guarantee Right Now that it all works; it worked on one arch but >>broke on another. However, we need to move further forward, and I am about >>to check that there is no similar breakage in distrib on other ports. >> >>In short, "this will be fixed in distrib/, not src/Makefile", and yes, I'm >>fixing the durned things. I already did for sparc, which was reported; it >>was at that point that I noted a need to check the other ports for same. >> > >So all the other ports have been checked/fixed? The reason I removed distrib >was on macppc...It was trying to make includes in here which makes zero sense >overall. > >That's the point. As it currently stands it breaks ports from building (or even >getting started if it breaks in includes). Until those have all been checked >it should be removed/null'd out from descending. > >James >


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It started with half-eaten dinners left cold, sitting at the table, waiting for the work crisis to pass. It never did.
Movies partially watched together, while a pressing work need called.
Dueling mortgages with a pressure to sell our former house while waiting to sell our condo.
A pregnancy that made me so ill that I could no longer go into work, for fear that I would vomit all over myself while driving.
A baby so needy that I didn't sleep for nearly a year, during which point, I had a minor nervous breakdown.
An unexpected string of miscarriages that left me in a puddle of hormone soup.
A precarious pregnancy that seemed doomed from the get-go, hallmarked by severe, crippling prepartum depression.
A baby born with a severe neural tube defect requiring neurosurgery within a few days of her entry into the world.
A debilitating case of PTSD coupled with chronic, daily migraines.
Work that can never be enough, never is enough, requiring total dedication to that, and that alone.
Years spent overcoming my past only to have it wallop me upside my face.
Realizing that what had once been a marriage, something so strong that I'd never doubted it, had turned into a yawning chasm between two very different people.
Figuring out where to go from here. Unsure if that chasm can ever be crossed.
196 Responses to Fly So High You Feel No Pain
sending lots of love your way friend.
Such honesty!! as always, I'm here for you sister.
Your raw pain is so evident. I wish I could hug you and take away this hurt. It's startling to remember that a person who grabs life by the balls and laughs the whole time hurts like the rest of us. You are an inspiration with all the wonderful work, love, and laughter you bring. You have so many hugs from me.
Writing about it all so no one has to feel like they are the only one.
Fucking heroic.
Oh, boy…can I ever relate! It is never easy…it is never simple. Sometimes you have to slam the breaks on life…run away together and get back to basics…I am sending prayers your way!
Well written. Best wishes to you, whichever way it goes.
Write it out. We can work on this together….all of us. People can overcome almost everything but a marriage that doesn't work. Slap it down and rise above.
The speed bumps, massive road blocks and detours we take in this life are actually the life itself. Often we hear, " OMG I couldn't do that/survive that". Those of us faced with no other option living in it, did not pick it or want it, we were never offered another option, a door number 2. We battle on, with humor as our defense, laying brick after brick around ourselves with each one liner, while those on the outside never realize we are just barricading ourselves in with those bricks because the world, the life is such a journey that we can not escape un-damaged. There are no words in the English language strong enough to convey the sense of importance or the level of empathy, so I simply leave you with the only ones I have, " I am so sorry, please know you are loved."
Your comment was as poignant as the article! Incredibly well said, and incredibly true.
when people say to me "I don't know how you do it" I always think "what choice do I have? I can crawl up in a ball and shut out the world, or i can keep on keeping on"…I guess that is our door number 2!
You have responded so perfectly, I am just going to say, I am sorry you are going through all this. And yes, know that you are loved.
I don't think I could sigh deep enough to illustrate my understanding.
That was such a raw honest post, and all I could think to myself is why is life so hard for so many of us? Why is life so bitterly unfair?
Currently I'm am too deep in my own head to see the light to give you any hopeful words of encouragement. Instead I just give you camaraderie in the land of awful. Maybe someone else can throw us a rope down?
Got any room on that rope for me?
Auntie B, hang on to it with us, maybe we can wiggle our ways up together. 🙂 Hugs, strength, light, hope, and "balls"… all headed your way.
Big hugs. We're all here for you <3
I'm made a lot like you.
You reach out and give of yourself through your pain because you understand other people's pain so well. Thank you for being so transparent about where you've been and where you are.
I'm sorry you're hurting. I'm sorry you aren't sure what to do and I know the insecurity is frightening.
It's such an honor to be part of the Band with you.
Sending endurance and peace and clarity and a big, long, embracing hug. Love you.
Offering you many hugs and a long rope to swing to the other side. I hope you can find a way over.
Oh Jesus. I SO get this. I'm crying. Hoping for you and the Daver, and me and my husband that we can come out of it together. And stronger.
Kristina, hugs to you! So many of us have been there, in similar situations. You'll get to the other side, I promise. There's just no way to know what it will look like from here. Stay strong!
I love you. I'm here for you. If you need me this weekend, you call, okay? Going to send my cell phone number just in case.
I hope for only the best outcome for you and your family. Please know that you have lots of love and support from at least one person you met once at a loud BlogHer party.
Life has a way of whacking us upside the head when we least expect it. It adds up and it's draining. The good thing is that even in the midst of darkness, you can always find a light somewhere. You have been that light for so many others. I can only hope that The Band can be at least one light source for you.
*tear* Hugs to you. It's a horrible feeling. I still remember. I hope that the both of you can cross that chasm and find your way back to each other. If not, you will find another, better path in time, though you may stumble on the way..
This is such a beautiful post, so honest and raw and real. It really sucks donkey balls that it's about something so painful. My heart aches for you AB. I wish you healing and clarity. Hugs.
Screw the work shit.
Sending love your way for everything else that you need, everything else that's important, everything else you deserve.
Sending you loads of love and hugs, Bex; no matter what happens, we're here for you.
I'm sorry hon. I'm here for whatever you need.
Ugh. There just aren't words that can possibly convey how I feel for you and how much I understand. Wishing you peace.
Oh, Aunt Becky.
Sending you love. And courage. And strength.
And chocolate, if it could fly through this computer.
You help so many – I hope you know how very many of us are out here rooting for you!
Such a powerful post. I wish I had powerful words to make things better. I don't. I am here though pulling for you every step of the way. Hugs and then more hugs.
Sending you love. This is beautifully written, and oh so sad.
I'm sorry you're hurting, especially after you've done so much for others. Whatever happens, I know you will be ok – you're Aunt Becky. She's strong as hell. We're all here for you as you've been for us. Much love…
Sounds a lot like some things that I'm too afraid to say….
If I still lived in Illinois, I would totally bring you vicodin chip cookies….. And a big hug.
LOL! Vicodin Chip Cookies.. that is awesome.
i love you. i'm here for you. i really look forward to hugging you on thursday. keep breathing, mama.
I am reminded of a scene in Rocky 6, where Sly tells his son "…it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward." Seems to me like you're tougher than most, because you keep takin' the hits and movin' forward. We don't need more sports "stars" as role models. We need more people like you as role models, Aunt Becky. People who take the hits that life dishes out and keep on going. Keep on doing. Giving back and finding ways to help others.
I can honestly say that if my children grow up to be like you, I'd be one of the proudest people in the world.
–Uncle Grayhawk (who is gonna find a way to play journey songs before your panels at Intervention)
Oh baby doll. I am so sorry you are hurting right now. Wish I could just wrap my arms around you and let you cry into my shoulder. Remember we are here. You have a whole spreadsheet of people to reach out to and you know we will pick up the phone. I love you so much.
I'm right there with you. It has been a hell of a last month.. again I will say.. LETS HANG OUT!!!! Come over. Now! *hugs*
A group of people lifting you up and making sure you see the sun. ZAP!
Sending you lots of love. I hoping you find a way to cross that chasm. If not we're all here for you. Text me if you ever need to talk.
Much love to you Aunt Becky. Praying for a clear direction for your family to move in.
Oh, Becky. My heart hurts for you. Big hugs.
Big big hugs! We're here for you!
Hugs lady. Lots of hugs.
As much love and hugs as I can send. You have done so much for others, let us hold you up for a while.
Hugs, hugs, and more hugs. I can relate to so much of this…the miscarriages, the marriage issues and more. My heart hurts for you. Keeping you all in my thoughts.
Oh Becky, I'm so sorry that you're going through so much right now. This is incredibly hard to read, so honest and scared and I just hope that you'll find a way across and come out stronger for it. Many hugs, friend.
Hugs and nothing but love for you and the family.
Becky, I am sending you many, many, hugs. It's so hard to know what is the right thing to do in these situations. I am positive you will make the right one for you and your family.
Thank you for being so open and honest. I agree with everyone else when they say it's hard to think of those that are always laughing as hurting.
I'm hoping that with all the comfort you provide for others (including me) that someone can do the same for you now.
i love you aunt motherfuckin' becky. you've helped me through SO MUCH, and i want to be here for you <3 <3 <3.
I'm sending love your way, and prayers, and strength, and wisdom (although I probably don't have much of that, but you are welcome to all of it) and love. You will make it through this.
If you need to talk, rant, cry – you call me anytime.
Love you. that.is.all.
I am so so sorry! Sending you huge hugs. Just keep breathing and know that we are here for you!!
Sending love and hugs your way. 🙁
Woof. If I could hand deliver you a glittery pony wrapped in bacon of happiness right now, I totally would. I wouldn't even still a bite first. Probably.
I'm sorry you're hurting.
I have no idea what to say. I'm here.
For all the times your posts or those of the Band (that we wouldn't have without you), have pulled me up from the bottom, here's hoping that these comments will help you. You are strong, fabulous and much loved by us on the internets. <3
Tons of hugs to you.
Wow… WOW… this really hit home for me. I hate that you're going through it too. This isn't the kind of hell where knowing someone else is living through it helps.
F*ck it. Let's go do shots.
I'm in.
Oh AB
My heart goes out to you, and I wish I REALLY wish I had a fucking magical wand to make life a little easier.
Just so you know – I think you're an amazing person, and I will be here for anything you need me. If I have to go on a roadtrip with my car full of uncrustables to prove it to you – well, that's what I'll fucking do.
Try to keep your chin up if you can, don't worry if you can't, and let me know if you need a man hug, a vat of uncrustables – or anything else.
Much love, and all that other touchy feely stuff. xoxo
Sending you lots of love and e-hugs, friend
Such a profound post. Thank you for sharing your life. As always, you are an amazingly strong person who most of us strive to be like. Hoping this is just another obstacle you will conquer, coming out the other side with even more superhuman strength than you had before with a family that is in the situation that is best for them.
…lean on the band. It's your turn now. They are there for you. <3
Oh, I am the same boat, maybe we can paddle together somewhere and get some drinks, kick some ass and try not to weep ourselves dry.
It is heart wrenching, the fucked-up-ness of marriages and relationships that don't divide and conquer, but just divide.
The last few years (for me and hubby) have been so damn hard and I don't see a clear light in sight yet – but I HOPE.
So if there is anything I could give you, it would be HOPE.
Oh, love, I wish I could take this pain away. You and the Daver will find a way to shrink that chasm between you; the first step has been taken by acknowledging the chasm is there. Sending much love and strength your way, dear lady.
Oh honey, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
Completely different causes, same totally unexpected result. Life is always a big freaking surprise. Love you, chick.
I love you. I'm so sorry for all the shit that's been piled on you. Know that you are loved and you are not alone. I'm sending light and love.
My number is in The Bible, but I'll email you to it too. Please call if you want to yell, scream, vent, laugh, etc.
I get it, get it, get it.
I felt swallowed by setbacks and injuries and body blows and silence and hormones and sleep deprivation for years. Felt the same chasm you do. But we're closing it. I hope that you can too if that's what you're yearning for.
Much love and strength to you.
i would say "i'm so sorry"…and that "i wish i could make it all better for you"….But everyone has already said that. And i would say…"that's life"…"somedays chicken, somedays feathers"……But that's just fuckin insensitive when you are hurting.
You are an amazing, strong person. You have had more than your share of hard times……..and you have come through it. THAT is what counts. It has made you the incredible, sensitive person/wife/mother/writer that you are today. You are my hero.
I'm sorry, Aunt Becky. Your Pranksters are pulling for you.
*interwebs hug*
I've been where you are. It sucks. You WILL get through it and be stronger than you ever thought you could be. You have the amazing support of so many friends- be grateful that you don't have to slog through this alone, like so many of us. Write HARD! Hugs.
Having tackled one of those chasms myself, I can say it's not so easy but it can be done. I am pulling for you, and hoping that everything works out the way you want it to. Much love to you, my friend.
Thank you for the post. I read your blog every day but haven't commented because I'm just not much of a commenter.
This, however, hits so close to home I just couldn't stay silent. My partner and I are working on it and it's difficult. Our relationship has been reduced to that of friendly roommates. That being said, I still couldn't imagine life without her (except when I'm really fed up). So, we keep trying in our inept, humans with hurt feelings way, to make things better.
Sometimes I try to imagine how my parents would have handled a situation like this. The answer, generally, is more fart jokes.
Hugs and glitter. This one is for you:
If chasms can be crossed you are the sort of person able to do so. Just seeing that list reminds me just how much you guys have been though these past few years. Most people would have crumbled in the face of such a list long ago. all best wishes for you both and also courage for the days ahead. xx
I'm sorry, hon. Listen: You are amazing. You inspire me every day with your tenacity, love, and refusal to give up. So, DON'T GIVE UP! Right now this sucks, and it's gonna suck for maybe a long time, but we Believe in you, and I have no doubt you can make it through this too and there are awesome things on the horizon for you. ~hugs~
Dearest Aunt Becky,
I'm so sorry for your pain. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers and sending mental hugs.
Wow. Been there. Never would have had the clit to write about it though. I think it's the natural ebb and flow of relationships. Sometimes you can bridge the gap, if both of you want it enough, and fate works in your favor. No advice, since what works for one, doesn't necessarily work for all. Just know that your inter-web nieces love them some Aunt Becky, and we're all pulling for you. (((HUGS))) and ass smacks to go around.
I'm right there with you Aunt Becky. The way my husband and I got here are completely different, but yet we're figuring out where to go from here as well.
Thank you for being so honest and putting words to something I'm similarly in the midst of.
Well. Shit.
As all have said before me, you have love and support as you figure all this out.
Marriage is hard. No one really explains that too well.
And You've been through a lot.
Good luck.
Oh, AB, I wish I could wrap you up in a big bacon wrapped cupcake hug. I'm here. I'm just a phone call or text away.
Sending promises on top of promises that we will be here for you now the way you have always been here for us before. Lean on the Pranksters and the Band and let us know if we can help at all, we owe it to you for sure.
If you need to bitch and get a drink I'm in Palatine. I read every day and can only imagine the sting.
P.S. I'm not a creepy stalker btw, I just know you are *awesomesauce* and you've helped me through a lot although I've been a lurker.
Sending many warm thoughts your way!
(Hugs) You know the best part about adopting the internet is that you now have a bazillion relatives that are here for you. Love you.
Oh Aunt Becky I so feel you on the TKO.I've been there. You know you'll make it through it at some point but you're just so exasperated at the moment. I'm praying for you and for your marriage and for everything else involved. Lots of love from here in WA
Thinking of you, Becky. Holding you close.
Ugh! Hang in there!!!
The only thing I can think of is:
Go give Amelia a hug.
I don't know what to say–it's painful to read your post and you are living it. Thinking of you, and hoping everything turns out OK.
We're here, in your corner of the ring, with a water bottle full of vodka and a fluffy pink towel and whatever else boxers have, to help you get ready for the next (much better) round.
Keep on keeping on – all of us whose lives have been touched by you have your back.
Aunt Becky, I have no words that can heal the hurt. I only have big squishee virtual bewbie hugs. I love you!
Love you my friend
I wish I had words to make this better. More than that I wish I could give you a big fat hug right now. I know what it's like to stare at the chasm and across to someone I wish I could reach. We're all here for you. Feel free to yell, scream, cry, question, after all hon… this is your place!
While our chasm was not so large, our problems not so dramatic or live threatening, hubby and I have been though a LOT in th past 8 years. Recently, we tOok a trip ( with a few other couples) but NO KIDS. It was amazing to be husband and wife with no dishes, no timeouts, no bed time ( but lots of sexy time). I HIGHLY recommend it, it you can swing it. Love, marie
You can clearly do whatever you set your mind to….I guess it's the deciding what to set your mind to part that's the devil. Wishes for peace and happiness.
It's a chasm…and it's deep and it's dark. But we hope that you can build a bridge, with the love of your children and your pranksters to find your way back to each other. It's so so hard. Much love you, both.
Sending you love and hugs and strength. I hope you find the light to reveal your path and the courage to continue to follow it to reach your happiness. we love you.
Oh, Aunt Becky. I'm sorry you're feeling like this. I've joked around that I'm like one of those clown balloon dolls that pop back up everytime it gets knocked down. And, whether for better or worse, I have friends who have been through their own obstacle courses. I know you'll do what's best and what's right for you and your family. It will be ok. Breathe. We are here for you, just like you've been here for us. — There aren't enough parentheses to make all the hugs I'm sending your way. <3
I know I'm one of hundreds and will probably get lost in the shuffle, but I wanted to say that in the least trite and overused way that I can, that I really and truly feel that you can and will overcome this. I know it may not seem possible,, because you've had a lot of hardships, but this may be the most difficult thing you'll ever do. When you're fighting your own head, you can medicate and therapy it into submission. When you're fighting physical illness, you can medicate it and pray but then just trust in God or fate. But when you're fighting someone you love, a whole other person that you can no longer predict their reactions because of a growing distance between you, you can't medicate the situation. You can go to therapy, but you can't trust or predict their reactions.
In addition to the absolute scads of support you see here, know that we also believe in you. Not just in your ability to weather a storm, but to stop the storm in it's tracks. And while we are a lively and fun bunch, take a vacation from us if you need to. We'll all be here when you get back. Trust your partners and take some time to heal your life and your marriage, no one will blame you or abandon you for that.
Beautifully said Vanessa! ^^^ Such wisdom and support we share here. Thank you, Becky!
Its so hard to know the right words. Relationships are so goddamn hard – sometimes worth it, sometimes not – but hard.
Thinking of you.
Oh Becky, the day I had to admit to myself and face up to the true state of what my marriage had become was one of the most painful days of my life. Different circumstances, but the result is the same. Look for a little Clarity over at Band Back Together, my friend, and know that you aren't alone.
I wish you luck and hope that whatever path you take leads you to find happiness in the end.
The Band is here. Loving you from Arkansas.
Wish I lived closer.
Thinking of you and your family.
Another lurker sending lots of good vibes to you AB.
I love you Becky. (((((hugs)))))
Aunt Becky, I love you! I am so sorry for your hurt, and wish I had something more profound than sorrow to share. But you're not alone. Ever.
You have been through so much, and the Daver has been through so much… it makes sense, sadly, that you'd come through it being different people. The biggest challenge is to stop looking to what you remember it being, and learning what it is in the present and what it will be in the future. Sometimes rediscovering your relationship is realizing that you can't rediscover it… you just have to start over. And that sucks.
Clearly, I don't know details, so my thoughts may be bullshit, but what ISN'T bullshit is that you're stronger than anything.
I truly believe that God never gives us more than we can handle… we just have to choose to handle it, as you always have. And choose to accept and lean on the love of those around you.
Be well, Aunt Becky. We love you!
Oh, Becky, I am so sorry. Though we got to the same place in different ways, my husband and I are in the same place right now and it is paralyzing. We are all here for you and hugging you and know that you are not alone. We understand. Let the Band help YOU now.
Thinking of you….sending love.
I wish I could hug you, pour you a drink, unwrap an uncrustable and let you tell me all about it. I really do make the best margaritas, if you're ever near Seattle the offer stands.
Dear Aunt Becky,
I just don't know what to say. But please know I'm sending lots of love and massive hugs all the way from Australia.
Jo xx
I'm usually a lurker, but I just wanted to let you know that I will be praying for you and the Daver. I really really hope you guys can work through this. *hugs*
This post brought me out of lurking. All my good thoughts are pointed in your direction right now. *hugs*
LOVEBOMBS millions of them!!!!
We talked yesterday woman. So you know I love you. Just hit me up if you need ANYTHING.
My husband and I separated last summer for about three months before I was ready to actually talk to him again. Nothing was really wrong, but, well, everything kind of was. We started testing the waters again, then he moved back in to our house about two months later.
It's a daily struggle sometimes, but, we're working on it. We both want to work on it. We're both committed to seeing it through. Lots of things helped us – just trying to enjoy each other. Counseling. Doing enjoyable things together. And…wow… this is going to sound cheesy…but… seriously? These cd's by Mort Fertel – the Marriage Fitness program. Totally different than anything else I'd ever tried.
Be strong sweetness. No matter what happens, you are going to be ok. You will. Promise.
Oh, AB. I'm in tears. I don't know what else to add that people up above haven't already said, except I am thinking of you and The Daver. Hugs.
🙁 Sending you warm thoughts and virtual hugs…
Everyone up there ^ has already said all the right things. Just when I had a good idea on what to say, someone else said it. It was a little like being at a really crowded support group. My first marriage ended because of a lot of the same things – work being all-important and all-consuming, feeling like a single parent who lives with an annoying roommate who never washes the dishes, etc. Even without the PPD and PTSD, it was more than I could take. I knew in the first year that it was doomed, but I stayed. And I stayed. And then, to shake things up, I stayed some more… Then, one day when we were 7 years in, I left. We still co-parent our son together, and there are still days I would rather set the fucker on fire than look at him, but I survived. And my life is so SO much better without him in it. Even now, obscenely happily remarried and having just given birth to a new baby, I still wonder what it would have been like if I had just put my foot down and told him what was wrong. I wonder what would have happened if I'd stayed, worked harder, made HIM work harder – not at his job, but at his home.
If repair is what you wish, I wish you the best. It can be done. The chasm can be closed, as you've seen from the comments. And if flying free is what you wish, know that you're strong enough for that too.
Very well put and well thought out. As Manda says, it can be done if you both wish it. Regardless of your choice, I hope for happiness for all of you. As a poster mentioned above, we'll all be waiting for you if a break is needed. And it goes without saying, we're all here for you if you need us. Much love.
My heart hurts for you, you who have done so much for so many other people. If there's anything I can do, any way I can help, please don't hesitate to ask.
So sorry you are in pain.
You know I love ya more than my luggage. ~~Clairee Belcher, Steel Magnolias
Becky, babe, you have been through a lot. A sh**load of a lot. More of a LOT than most of us will ever experience. You have a habit of trying to tough everything out on your own.
Get some marriage help. Tell the Daver what you need and listen to what he needs.
Get help. Remember how much better things got when you got the right meds for the Migraines. And the help you got for PPD. You need help now, so your whole life does not blow up. A fucked up marriage can be patched up, repaired, even healed. With work, with time, and with help. I think you are one funny and crazy ass writer babe but for now you need to take care of yourself. Get the help you need. Because you already have our love.
Sending much love. I've been there, it's not easy, but whatever path you choose, it will be the right one for you.
Oh, Becky! Reading this on my iPod while getting the kid to sleep. Love -you so much. Come visit us. Seriously, we have room. Huge hug from me and my girl gives the best kisses ever. Come to NY to collect, we'll take good care of you. Mwah.
It's amazing how many of us understand, how many of us have been there, how many of us are currently there…
I'm so sorry. For you and for all of us in marriages we don't quite understand, marriages we are not sure we want anymore…
And life brings you to another crossroad. Which way?
The "right now" answer is you don't have to decide today. Breathe. I will walk this journey with you if you choose to include me. A year ago next month, I faced similar decisions. Faced with my own "which way?", I had to step out of my own head. Hardest thing I've done yet in this life.
Breathe Becky. Keep writing. Hug your babies.
oh damn, this is heartbreaking.
i wish i had some good advice, but my relationships have never faded away, only blown up in spectacular fashion.
is there any one thing that y'all could do together that might help to bridge that gap? i hope you can hold it together, and find your closeness again.
I have nothing useful to add. Just *hugs*.
I want you to re-read all those comments up there, and know I'm loving you as hard as I can love another person right now. If I thought I could figure it out, and that it would help, I'd invent a hot dog Uncrustable just for you.
Huge hugs, Aunt Becky . . . I don't have anything to add . . . just, well, life sucks sometimes . . . but there's an army of pranksters who are ALWAYS here for you.
Love you.
You need me, you phone me, right?
Would now be a bad time to say "SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!"?
((hug)) It seems to be about that time in a lot of marriages… Life's such a bitch.
I'm going to come back and read all the comments because I think there is probably advice in there that I & my relationship could use, but before I can do that I have to get my butt in the kitchen & cook dinner. Until then I send you my love. I hope it helps you that we are all here.
Oh AB….you awaken my deepest empathies. Everyone before me already said everything I would say to you.
I only know you through your words but there is something incredibly resilient about you. I'm sorry for your pain. I wish better for you. You deserve to be happy.
First time reader must comment: Know you are held to the Universal Healing Power. Know that many others love and support you. Know I too am sending strength. I subscribed.
Hey Aunt Becky. Nothing I can say except I've been there, smoked myself down to 105 pounds, thought I was starving myself to death, cried and gave up drinking because I scared myself. The kids survived. I survived. He survived. Although for a long time none of us thought we would. Therapy helped. Trust your gut. Hang in there or don't. I love you either way.
Oh sweetie. So, so sorry. Sending you heaps of love and peace. Keeping you in my thoughts.
Oh Aunt Becky.
Thank you for your honesty. I wish I could say something that would give you half the support you've (knowingly or not) given to me.
Many hugs & loads of love,
Hi Auntie Bex. I'm so sorry this is where you are. I am glad you're at least able to write it out so you can receive all the love and support pouring your way. Add a coupon for a bottomless basket of heart-hugs to your pile of support. You're amazing.
I am so sorry for this hard time you have been dealt!!! Just know that your Band of Merry Pranksters are always here for you!!!
I *just* started reading your posts and can see that you have a lot of good support from your pranksters. I too wanted you to know though that, three years ago, I was where you are. Just realizing that the chasm exists, it's so raw and painful, just as you wrote. Working to bridge it is, well, a lot of work and exhausting and exasperating at times. But I am also telling you that if both of you want your marriage back, it can be done. You CAN do it, together. We used the book Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage by Gottman, Gottman and DeClaire as a starting point. Really, we are now better, stronger, smarter, more forgiving and loving than ever. We work on it all the time, but it's much much easier now. Thinking of you —
Oh wow. I am so sorry that you are having to go through such a difficult time. I don't want to say the cliche "I know how you feel" – because I don't…or "I can't even imagine" – because that would belittle your struggle. So I can only say that I will pray for you and hope that things change for the better. xoxo
dearest Auntie,
I'm so hoping that everything works out in a way that leaves you happy.
I came here earlier and I didn't know what to say and I'm I'm still not sure I do. Everyone is different. Everyone deals with things differently and everyone comes out of the shit that's flung at them in different ways. I have been through a lot of the same things or comparable that you have with my husband. However, we are sure of one thing, we never want to not be in this life together. It took a while but I think I finally figured out that sometimes are just not going to be magical, perfect family times. Sometimes moms need a nap and sometimes Dads do, too. We have to give each other a break AND we have to make time for each other. You spend a lot of time doing so much for others AB, this may be a good time to some time for yourself & your hubs and try to reconnect. Let go and let others handle whatever is going on outside of your marriage and just go remember what you both thought was so amazing about the other in the first place. Then do something with the kids as a family. Unplugged. Go somewhere you've been wanting to go that's fun, that you've never been before or you've been wanting to back to for a long time, leave all technology at home (except a phone for real emergencies) and just ENJOY. Marriages go through stages. The Honeymoon stage isn't always on top of the list but there are other stages that can be just as important and just as meaningful and sometimes not so meaningful when we're just busy with kids pounding through day to day stuff…but hey, boring is better than dramatic. Anyway, all the stages are important and they don't always mean a marriage is over. Yours sounds like it's worth working on. So go put yourself in Work Time Out and tell him to do the same, unplug from the world for one weekend and concentrate on the Fam.
Love and hugs to you! You are one strong woman and will get through this and come out the other end in one piece!
Oh sweet AB! Another lurker sending you lots of virtual love and support! Wishing you and the Daver everything you need to get through this, past this and beyond this! You have overcome so much and inspired so many people I hope you can soon add this to the "shit I got through" pile and I'm praying that at some point the shit stops coming! Wishing you a lifetime supply of Uncrustables and happiness. <3
Aunt Becky- I read your post yesterday and felt bad. I woke up this morning still feeling sad for you. No one ever tells you that marriage is a fuckton of work. Screw work. It'll still be there. Go take care of your relationship.At the end of the day it's what really matters. The other pranksters and I will wait.
I will never understand why some of us have more struggles than others. My last few years have been pretty damn close to yours. Money and work issues, miscarriages, my failing mental health, an nt defect that didn't end well, more miscarriages, and dealing with autism; all left us both spinning looking for a place to land. Sometimes we would look around and realize that we landed REALLY fucking far apart. Other times, I WANTED to be far from him, he couldn't possibly understand how hard all this was for ME. But the thing was even if he didn't understand, it was just as hard for him, in different ways. We just have to keep crawling and clawing back to each other. Right now, we are that soft place to land for each other and I hope and pray we will still be tomorrow. I can't pretend to know how far apart you two are feeling, how much damage there is, or even if there is hope between you. But, I will tell you that if there is, keep going, you can build that bridge. I love you Becky and I am here if you ever need to talk.
wish I could take the punches for you, even one tough cookie needs a stand in once in a while. thanks for the honesty, as always.
Me too! ^^^
Girl, lookit all that love! This would be one big-ass group hug right here. Here's hoping you and The Daver find what it takes to be on the same page again. Thinking of you and sending love your way….
Honey, I understand. Our lives parallel each other in so many ways, and I am facing the same kind of chasm. Love and light to you. Hang in there.
Love ya girl. I'll be thinking of you all.
oh AB. i am so sorry. sending tons of love and hugs and sparkly bits of junk your way. give it a minute though, cause it is coming from Texas. and that is pretty far. hence the reason i could not send cookies.
I have no words, at least none that are more eloquent than those that have come before me. I can only echo them. {{{hugs}}}
Hugs and glitter. Purple glitter pouring from a rainbow unicorn pinata's butt.
Happy thoughts. For you. Maybe help? Good luck.
I have nothing else to add but I'm so sorry. The Band loves you and wants to help in any way we can.
Aunt Becky,
Can't even begin to tell you how hard that was to read. And to have been there and know that heart-heavy feeling. To know that the writing of it was a million times harder than my reading it.
But just a few words of hope: I've peered into that chasm. Known its hollow depths were hungering for me. And made it across. It was a long process…about 2 years of highs and lows. But if both people are willing, in some cases, it can be done.
But in this case, whether it can or can't, we Pranksters are here for you. That's what Pranksters are for.
Hugs to you. (Oh, and my stressed food of choice? Yoplait Whips. When stress has me so nauseous that I can't keep anything down, for some reason those work. Just in case you need to know.)
This may sound weird but reading about your pain is refreshing in that you usually come across as strong, and sarcastic, and invulnerable.
I am so sorry life has decided to not reward you with the piece of mind you deserve. You help so many others, you should expect so many to help you when your need it.
Thanks for letting me read human Aunt Becky. I want you to know that I read and admire you on a daily basis. I hope you find the strength to persevere and be the borderline superheor so many of us view you as.
No advice. Just wanted to let you know I heard you.
(((Hug))) Much love and support
You KNOW that I know from whence you speak… so you call or text or email me any time you need to vent or just have a laugh with a pal. I'll tell you about my Uncle Jack.
Aunt Becky,
I don't have the answers, and I can't make it better. All I can tell you is how much it means to me and a bajillion other pranksters that you put things like this out there. You say what a lot of us feel but are afraid to share. And because of that? You rock my world. Sending you hugs. And know that even if it seems like it? You are not alone. You're just brave enough to step out HERE, where it feels lonely.
Sending love.
Thank you. Your bravery inspires.
Sending many hugs and much love.
I'm sorry. 🙁
So much love for you both….
I'm so sorry (((hugs)))
Dear Becky, I don't think I've ever commented, though I read MWV every day. I just wanted to echo the sentiment that you are not alone, though that chasm can feel like it swallows you whole. My only advice is love yourself and your kids during this time. Hang tough, you're a warrior princess even if you don't feel like it every day. I will also say a prayer for you and the Daver. Love from a lurker…
sending you love and good energy, Aunt Becky.
AB, thinking of you. Sure wish I had something great to say that would make you feel better. Just know that people care. xo
What she said!
Hugs and Love to you!
I'm thinking of you. I hope that everything works out in the best way possible.
Being sad is bullshit go make time and get back to basics HUGS to you and the Daver
Noooo…. I hope good things for you, that you find your way through to on top. Love to you – and the children and the Daver.
I hope that like all things this chasm is temporary. It sounds like you have something great with the Daver, something worth fighting for. Drifting apart because of work and the craziness of life is so common. Can you two escape for an hour (or a week) together? Sending you lots of love and wishing you better times soon!
I know this feeling. Love to you & hope for a solution.
I am so sorry. I hope you and Daver are able to breach the chasm. Whatever happens, I hope it works out for the best. My thoughts are with you.
Much love to you and Dave. The bumps are big and the road is rocky, but so worth it. Marriage is just plain hard work. There have been many a day where I had my shit packed – mentally. I had the budget lined out and a house in the neighborhood ready to rent. If you still love him and he still loves you, do the work. It's worth it.
My prayers are with you. It's a hard journey — but, you're not alone. {{{HUGS}}}
Like so many, I understand where you are at. Thinking of you and hope that however things work out, it is for the best for everyone.
there's always a way to build a bridge if you dont mind searching for the right materials
I'm so sorry to hear this. I remember the feelings all too well as I watched my own marriage fail and I wouldn't wish them on anyone else. Hopefully you can find a way to bridge the gap. It might take some work but it may be the best work you have ever done. I'm just an email or Facebook message away if you need someone to vent to. {{Hugs}}
Beautiful, sad and raw all at the same time.
I know… I know..
In the trenches with you..
I wish I had something wise and wonderful to say, but all I can think of is: you are they eye of the MOTHERFUCKING TIGER!!! We love you and you will kick ass at whatever you do. As a previous post put it, LOVE BOMBS to you <3 <3 <3


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Watch Shane Battier's Hilarious "Battioke" Love Boat Parody CommercialJanuary 18, 2013
Lots of professional athletes have their own charities, each for various causes. In the case of Miami Heat three-point specialist Shane Battier, he has the Take Charge Foundation, whose focus is getting underprivileged teens into college.
Battier does something a bit different to raise money for his charity. It's called "Battioke," which I believe is Japanese for "watch Battier and his Miami teammates sing the hits."
While the idea of Battier and his teammates singing badly is funny in itself, even more hilarious is the way he advertises the latest Battioke event. Instead of just having any old commercial, the former Duke Blue Devil has gone the extra mile in channeling the cheesiest TV show ever, The Love Boat.
It's made even funnier because of Battier's reputation as something of a silent assassin. He shows up to work and does his job with a stony face, and that's it.
Well, this commercial pretty much proves that he is the opposite of a scary shooter.
Kudos to Battier's teammates for getting involved and fully embracing the cheesiness of the show they're parodying. From Mike Miller's goofy smile to LeBron James doing his best Rick James impression, it's clear that everyone is having fun with it. As a viewer, I actually want to fly down to Miami and attend this event.
After watching this commercial, one can't help but think of what would happen if other teams did this. What if the Oklahoma City Thunder spoofed Bonanza and had "KD-Oke"? And what if the Los Angeles Clippers did a similar event, but with a song parody called "We Built Lob City"?
Anyway, I'm getting overly excited. The fact is that karaoke is fun, and Battier is catering to fans of both the activity and basketball. The point of singing karaoke is to have fun and be a complete and utter dork, and Battier just wants people to do that with him in supporting his foundation.
That said, I can't wait for the next commercial. Might I suggest that he spoof Miami Vice, complete with custom lyrics?


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Liam Hemsworth: Man of the Week
You'd recognise her face (legs, hair, etc) anywhere, but how much do you really know about Kate Moss? On her 41st birthday, ELLE recounts 41 incredible Kate style moments - with 41 pretty awesome Kate facts into the bargain. Viva la Moss!
Download the digital edition of ELLEMore
Kate has admitted that she was convinced to accept her husband Jamie Hince's proposal of marriage while watching Big Fat Gypsy Weddings.
Kate and Jamie arrive for the Maison Margiela Couture Spring 2015 show in London.
Hubby Jamie Hince reportedly bought Kate an apartment in Paris for her 40th birthday.
At a Versace party for Kate's 25th birthday.
New Year, New Wardrobe


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I'm Trying to Date StrangersVisitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
i find that the last few girls i've tried to date, i have come across this same type of obstacle. these are girls whom i would get their phone numbers and when i would try calling them, sometimes their like never avaliable. it's understandable if they are busy, however if i do leave a message to call me back, they never do. for example this one girl i'm trying to check, i call her up to ask her to the movies. she said she would call me closer to the day of the date to let me know if she would come, but she never called. i called her the day before, just to touch base and for her to call me back but she never did, and as such we never ended up going.
what should i do to avoid these types of things and what can you suggest i can do to and places i can go to meet women to date who would show some more interest so that things can go more smoothly? if you need more info for better clairification, let me know.thank you.
RomanceClass.com Advice
Do you even know these women you're asking out? It sounds like they are avoiding you and that you're not friends with them in the first place! A date should be about finally having private time with someone that you know in public. A date should be a person that you are friends with that you now want to move on to the next level.
These women sound like they're afraid to tell you that they're not interested and they're playing the hiding games! This isn't the way that a friend of yours would act. If a woman isn't even comfortable talking to you on the phone, how could she be comfortable being along with you for many hours?
You need to take a step back here. If you're interested in a woman, don't just leap into taking her out all alone. That's very threatening for any human being. Instead, talk to her. Spend time with her. Build up the friendship. Learn her interests! Find out what sorts of movies she enjoys.
Then when a movie that SHE wants to see comes along, offer to go along with her to it. Don't even plan dinner! A movie is very non-threatening, especially if you guys already have built up the talking relationship. After the movie if things are good, she'll want to get dinner or a drink or something! But by taking it in stages, you make it non-threatening, you make it safe. And the more comfortable she is, the more likely she is to enjoy herself and to want to do it again.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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Am 12.10.2010 um 09:23 schrieb Alex Danilo: > Hi Niko & Shane, > > Now I see the difference, child relationships. > > Anyway see inline: > > --Original Message--: >> Hi Shane, >> >> I think you are misunderstanding something: >> >>> <path d="M-25,-12.5 L25,-12.5 L 0,-87.5 z" fill="yellow" >>> stroke="red" stroke-width="7.06" id="MyTriangle" > >>> </path> >>> <animateMotion dur="6s" repeatCount="indefinite" rotate="auto" > >>> <mpath xlink:href="#path1"/> >>> </animateMotion> >> >> This example is not correct, how shall the user agent know to which >> element the animation should be applied? >> It works as expected if you'd assign xlink:href="#MyTriangle" to your >> <animateMotion> element. > > The animateMotion should be applied to the parent element which in > that case is the <svg>. Since that's a container element all the > content should have the animateMotion applied. So the example is OK. Hehe, now that was stupid, I should have had my coffee before mailing :-) But I'm still questioning wheter it's valid as SVGSVGElement is not SVGTransformable, but only SVGLocatable. So shall it be possible to apply transforms to SVG using SMIL animations, but not through <svg transform=".." Cheers, NikoReceived on Tuesday, 12 October 2010 07:25:54 UTC
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.3.1 : Wednesday, 8 March 2017 09:47:22 UTC


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Sarah Ferguson owed money to an accountancy firm, a solicitor and a family-run photographic printing company, court papers show.
The 49-year-old, who recently starred in a television documentary exploring the problems of life on council housing estates, is understood to have settled the outstanding bills.
After her divorce from Prince Andrew in 1996, the Duchess is thought to have owed as much as £4.2 million to Coutts, the bank used by the royal family. She paid those debts by establishing a successful career making public appearances in the United States where she earned £2m a year as the public spokesman for Weight Watchers.
A report in The Sun claims the Duchess owed £17,672 to Hertfordshire business and accountancy firm MJ Brooks before it took her to London County Court.
It also reported that a firm of solicitors took her to Northampton County Court over a £1,750 bill while photographic firm Shades, of Woking, Surrey, went to Guildford County Court to claim £2,117 owed for prints.
None of the firms named in the report would make any comment about the cases or confirm any of the details.
A spokesman for the Duchess said the cases were "a private matter".


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