text:
|Course code
|Implementing Citrix NetScaler 11 for App and Desktop Solutions (CCA-N) Exam voucher included
|on your request
|on your request
|Contact Us
Implementing Citrix NetScaler 11 for App and Desktop Solutions (CCA-N) Exam voucher included
Implementing Citrix NetScaler 11 for App and Desktop Solutions (CCA-N) Exam voucher included
The objective of Implementing Citrix NetScaler 10.5 for App and Desktop Solutions is to provide the foundational concepts and skills necessary to implement, configure, secure, and monitor a Citrix NetScaler system with NetScaler Gateway in a desktop virtualization environment such as one containing Citrix XenDesktop 7.x or Citrix XenApp, while providing secure application and data access to users. This course is designed specifically for learners who have limited or no previous NetScaler experience. In order to successfully complete this course, learners will have access to hands-on exercises within a virtual lab environment. An optional module on NetScaler SDX appliances is included with reinforcement simulation exercises. This course is based on the Citrix NetScaler 10.5 product, but the skills and fundamental concepts learned are common to earlier product versions.
Skills and Key Topics
Upon successful completion of this course, learners are able to:
- Identify the capabilities and functionality of the NetScaler
- Explain basic NetScaler network architecture
- Obtain, install, and manage NetScaler licenses
- Identify the capabilities and functionality of NetScaler Gateway
- Explain how SSL is used to secure the NetScaler
- Configure authentication for users on the NetScaler Gateway
- Implement authorization to determine to which resources users have access
- Configure the NetScaler for high availability
- Integrate NetScaler Gateway with Storefront or Web Interface to provide remote access for Web, SaaS and mobile apps.
- Implement load balancing and GSLB on the NetScaler system
- Customize the NetScaler system for traffic flow and content-specific requirements
- Configure endpoint analysis to determine the level of access for specific devices
- Enable access to applications and data for user connections
- Demonstrate monitoring and reporting through native NetScaler logging tools
- Configure NetScaler Insight Center to monitor a desktop virtualization environment
- Employ recommended tools and techniques to troubleshoot common NetScaler network and connectivity issues
- Identify the unique capabilities and functionality of the NetScaler SDX platform.
- Identify the networking characteristics of the NetScaler SDX platform.
- Explain the process of provisioning and administration of NetScaler VPX instances on a NetScaler SDX appliance.
Getting Started
- Introduction to Citrix NetScaler
- NetScaler Functionality
- NetScaler Overview
- Product Features
- Hardware Platforms
- Hardware Components
- nCore Configuration Architecture
- Deployment Scenarios
- NetScaler Gateway Overview
- NetScaler Gateway Platforms
- Initial NetScaler Access
- NetScaler Licenses
- NetScaler Gateway Licensing
- To Install the NetScaler Gateway License
- NetScaler Gateway Pre-Installation Checklist
- Replacing Securing Gateway
- Configuring NetScaler Gateway for First-time Use
- Settings Configuration
- End-User Access with the FQDN
- Configuration Testing
- Name Service Providers Configuration
- Performing an Upgrade
- Save the Configuration
Basic Networking
- OSI Networking Model
- NetScaler Architecture Overview
- NetScaler-owned IP addresses
- Network Topology
- NetScaler Gateway Deployment
- NetScaler Network Interfaces
- Virtual Local Area Networks (VLANs)
- IP Address Routing
- Mac-based Forwarding Mode
- Determining the Source IP Address
- Link Aggregation
High Availability
- High Availability Functionality
- High Availability Node Configuration
- Propagation and Synchronization
- High Availability Management
- Upgrading a High Availability Pair
- High Availability Issues
- High Availability Pair in Different Subnets
- Adding a Remote Node
- To Add a Remote Node for Independent Network Computing Mode
Basic Load Balancing
- Load Balancing Basics
- Entity Management
- Server Creation
- Service Monitoring
- Services Configuration Overview
- Virtual Server Creation
- Binding Services or Service Groups to a Virtual Server
- Traffic Types
- Default Monitors
- Built-In Monitors
- Monitor Parameters
- Creating Monitors
- HTTP Monitoring
- Extended Application Verification (EAV) Monitoring
- Extended Content Verification (ECV) Monitoring
- HTTP-ECV and TCP-ECV Monitoring Process
- Reverse Condition Monitoring
- Setting Monitor Thresholds
- Custom Monitors
- XenDesktop Delivery Controller Monitoring
- StoreFront Store Monitoring
- TFTP Server Monitoring
- Load Balancing Methods
- Service Weights
- Persistence and Persistence Connections
- Load Balancing Configuration Protection
- Load Balancing Wizards
- Disabling Services
- Graceful Shutdown of Services
- Removing Services
- Configuration Verification
- The Load Balancing Visualizer
Securing NetScaler
- SSL Session Process
- Features and Benefits
- Offload Performance
- Digital Certificates
- SSL Administration
- SSL Offload Overview
- Deployment Scenarios
- Citrix Recommendations for SSL
- SSL Renegotiation Attack
- SSL Troubleshooting
- SSL Offload Troubleshooting
AppExpert Classic Policy Engine
- Policies Overview
- Policies and Profile Configuration
- Policies Creation
- Traffic Policies
Authentication and Authorization
- System and AAA User Groups
- Local Accounts
- External Authentication
- External Authentication for System Users
- NTLMV2 Authentication
- Configuration of Command Policies for Delegating Administrators
- Custom Command Policy Configuration for Delegated Adminstrators
- Authentication Configuration
- Authentication Types Supported on NetScaler
- Default Global Authentication Types Configuration
- Local Users Configuration
- Authentication Policies
- LDAP Authentication Policies
- RADIUS Authentication Policies
- Client Certificate Authentication Configuration
- Smart Card Authentication Configuration
- To Disable Authentication
- Authentication, Authorization, and Auditing (AAA) Issues
Access Policies
- Endpoint Analysis
- Endpoint Policies
- Pre-Authentication Policies
- Pre-Authentication Policies and Profiles
- Security Pre-Authentication Expressions Configuration of End-User Devices
- Operating System Policies Configuration
- Antivirus, Firewall, Internet Security, or Anti-Spam Expressions Configuration
- To Configure a Client Service Scan
- Security Checks Configuration
- To Configure Process Policies
- File Scan Policies Configuration
- To Configure a Session or Pre-Authentication Policy to Check for a File on the End User Device
- Registry Policies Configuration
- To Configure a Registry Policy
- To Create a Sample Pre-Authentication Scan
- Custom Expressions Configuration
- To Bind Pre-Authentication Policies
- Post-Authentication Policies
- End-User Logon Options Evaluation
- Quarantine Groups
- Endpoint Analysis Troubleshooting
End User Access and Experience
- Connection Methods
- Secure Tunnel Establishment
- Network Firewalls and Proxies
- Secure Tunnel Termination
- NetScaler Gateway Plug-in Support
- Software Firewalls
- NetScaler Gateway Plug-In Integration with Citrix Receiver
- Citrix Receiver Home Page
- NetScaler Gateway Plug-In Selection for End-Users
- NetScaler Gateway Plug-In Deployment, Upgrading, and Removal from Active Directory
- Client Ports
- NetScaler Gateway Plug-in Connection Configuration
- End User Connections Proxy Support Enablement
- Session Policies
- Credential Passing
- Configuring the Default Home Page for SSL VPN and Clientless VPN Connections
- Timeout Settings
- Split Tunneling
- Timeout Settings Configuration
- Client Cleanup
- Single Sign-on Configuration
- Client Interception
- To Configure Name Service Resolution
- Access Interface Configuration
- Clientless Access
- Domain Access Configuration for End Users
- SharePoint Site
- Clientless Access Settings Using Web Interface
- Client Choices Page Configuration
- Access Scenario Fallback Configuration
- NetScaler Gateway Advanced Concepts
Integrating NetScaler Gateway with XenApp and XenDesktop
- NetScaler Gateway Prerequisites
- Firewall Rules
- StoreFront Services Deployment
- Beacons
- Enabling Access Method Fallback with Policies
- SSL Certificate Trust
- Session Policies
- Session Profile Creation
- Custom Clientless Access Policies Configuration for StoreFront Services
- XenApp and XenDesktop Addition to a Single Site
- XenMobile Platform Overview
AppExpert Default Policy Engine
- Understanding Policies
- Understanding Packet-Processing Flow
- Policy Process Evaluation Flow
- Identifying Default Policy Expressions
- Actions
- Configuring Policies and Actions
- Understanding Bind Points
- Understanding Policy Labels
- Pattern Sets
- Typecasting
- Responder, Rewrite, and URL Transformation
- Responder Policies
- Responder Actions
- Respond With
- Responder HTML Page Imports
- Rewrite Policies
- Configure a Rewrite Action
- Binding Policies
Global Server Load Balancing
- GSLB Deployment Methods
- GSLB Concepts
- GSLB Entities
- GSLB DNS Methods
- Metric Exchange Protocol
- Implementing GSLB
- Viewing and Configuring GSLB with the Visualizer
- Configuration Site-to-Site Communication
- RPC Node Password
- Encryption of Site Metrics Exchange
- Source IP Address for an RPC Node
- GSLB Site Communication Example
- Customizing the GSLB Configuration
- Changing the GSLB Method
- GSLB Persistence
- Using Dynamic Weights for Services
- Monitoring GSLB Services
- Binding Monitors to a GSLB Service
- Monitoring GSLB Sites
- Protecting the GSLB Setup Against Failure
- Responding with an Empty Address Record When in the DOWN State
- Backup IP Address Configuration for a GSLB Domain
- Implementing GSLB Failover for Disaster Recovery
Monitoring and Management
- Monitoring Needs
- Monitoring Methods
- AppFlow on the NetScaler System
- HDX Insight
- NetScaler Log Management
- Troubleshooting Resources
- Troubleshooting Tools
- Display NetScaler System Information
- Labs-only module covering 4 Troubleshooting Scenarios
Appendix A: NetScaler SDX Addendum
- Introduction to the NetScaler SDX Appliance
- Product Benefits
- Hardware Platforms
- Deployment Scenarios
- Licensing
- Base Architecture
- IO Virtualization
- VLAN Filtering
- Restricting VLANs to Specific Virtual Interfaces
- NetScaler SDX High Availability
- Service VM Overview
- Device Management
- Instance Management
- Provisioning a NetScaler VPX Instance on an SDX Appliance
- NetScaler SDX Service VM Internals
- Simple Consolidation
- Data Plane Isolation with Shared Interfaces
- Simple Consolidation with Delegated Administration
- Consolidation Across Security Zones
- SNMP Trap Destinations
- Adding an SNMP Manager Community
- Configuring the NetScaler for SNMPv3 Queries
- SNMP Views
- SNMP Users
- SNMP Alarms
- System Health Monitoring
- Third-Party Virtual Machines
- Managing the NetScaler SDX Appliance
Before taking this course, Citrix recommends that learners have the following:
- Familiarity with application delivery and cloud networking
- Experience with Citrix desktop virtualization technologies, such as XenDesktop and XenApp
- Familiarity with Microsoft Windows Server 2008 R2
- Familiarity with Microsoft Windows Server 2012
- Experience with Microsoft SQL Server or enterprise database servers
- Experience with Active Directory and Group Policy
- Basic understanding of Microsoft Remote Desktop Services
- Basic understanding of Windows Server networking concepts, such as DNS, IIS®, and load balancing
- Exposure to basic system administration concepts, including logging, software upgrade procedures, and high availability operations
- Familiarity with server monitoring tools
- Basic understanding of VPN concepts, including SSL encryption and certificates
This course is recommended for learners who are:
- New to the NetScaler platform
- Interested in integrating NetScaler Gateway with Citrix XenDesktop or Citrix XenApp


text:
Adventure at the Bottom of the World, Adventure at the Top of the World (PAWS IV)
Two books in one, this unique volume tells the stories of two mountain climbers. One is 89-year-old Norman Vaughan and the other is Merrick Johnston, the youngest person to scale Denali. Ages 10 and up.
Please visit Help Page for Questions
regarding ISBN / ISBN-10 / ISBN10, ISBN-13 / ISBN13, EAN / EAN-13, and Amazon
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Copyright © 2003-2014 AllDiscountBooks.net All rights reserved.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
i just looked at how i am related to Cleopatra, it says she is my 65th great grandmother, is this that accurate or?
No, there are probably several wrongdoings and I wouldn't put much trust in it. But then again, I haven't looked at your tree.
you will be descended from most people living that long ago, but the exact relationship path will have errors


text:
I argued in Receiver protection limits that there are better ways to manage poor receivers causing cross-channel interference problems than specifying receiver standards. Here are two analogies to sharpen one's intuition for the most appropriate way to handle such situations.
Cities increase the salinity of rivers running through them, affecting downstream agriculture. However, the choices that farmers make determine the degree of harm; some crops are much more salt-tolerant than others. In order to ensure that farms bear their part of the burden, regulators have a choice: they can either regulate which crops may be grown downstream, or they can specify a ceiling on the salinity of the water leaving the city limits, leaving it up to farmers to decide whether to plant salt-tolerant crops, perform desalination, or move their business elsewhere. Limits on salinity protection are a less interventionist solution, and don't require regulators to have a deep understanding of the interaction between salinity, crops and local geography.
Sound pollution is another analogy to radio operation. Let's imagine that the state has an interest in the noise levels inside houses near a freeway. It can either provide detailed regulations prescribing building set-backs and comprehensive specifications on how houses should be sound-proofed, or it could ensure that the noise level at the freeway-residential boundary won't exceed a certain limit, leaving it up to home-owners to decide where and how to build. Again, noise ceilings are a simple and generic regulatory approach that does not limit the freedom of citizens to live as they choose, and that does not require the regulator to keep pace with ever-evolving technologies to sound-proof buildings.


text:
Who to start, who to bench. Grab that WW guy? Low priced rookie or high priced stud?
2 posts • Page 1 of 1
Who would you recommend keeping in a 12 team, h2h points league: CC Sabathia or Yu Darvish. Both players would take up the same draft slot so that is not in consideration. In our scoring last year, Yu finished 10 points ahead of CC but scoring this year will punish bad starts more. Opinions?
Re: Keepers
I am buying into Darvish this year. He had a pretty solid year last year with huge K numbers. I expect him to take another step forward by bringing his BB% down a little which should help minimize his bad starts. As for CC I think we might be seeing the beginning of the end for him. He might give solid numbers when he is healthy but health will be the problem.
2 posts • Page 1 of 1
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text:
NBA Basketball - Preview
The fans at Chesapeake Energy Arena will be treated to a game between the Memphis Grizzlies and the Oklahoma City Thunder when they take their seats on Monday.
The Grizzlies were a 99-90 winner in their most recent outing at home against the Bucks. They failed to cover the 12.5-point spread as favorites, while the total score (189) made winners of OVER bettors.
Oklahoma City lost its last outing, a 96-81 result against the Wizards on February 1. The Thunder failed to cover in that game as a 5-point favorite, while the 177 combined points took the game UNDER the total.
Team record: 26-20 SU, 21-24-1 ATS
Current streak: won 6 straight games.
is 5-0 SU in its last 5 games
is 5-0 SU in its last 5 games on the road
The total has gone UNDER in 5 of last 5 games on the road
The total has gone UNDER in 9 of last 10 games
When playing on Monday are 7-3
Before playing Dallas are 7-3
After playing Milwaukee are 8-2
After a win are 9-1
Oklahoma City:
Team record: 38-11 SU, 29-20 ATS
is 5-0 SU in its last 5 games at home
is 10-1 SU in its last 11 games
The total has gone OVER in 13 of last 17 games when playing at home against Memphis
The total has gone UNDER in 7 of last 10 games at home
When playing on Monday are 7-3
Before playing Minnesota are 7-3
After playing Washington are 4-6
After a loss are 7-3
Next up:
Memphis home to Dallas, Wednesday, February 5
Oklahoma City home to Minnesota, Wednesday, February 5


text:
Novato, CA > All Time > green tea ice creamTop Dishes >
Best green tea ice cream dishes in Novato, CA 1 mi
Search within distance
Recent locations
Couldn't find any 'green tea ice cream' dishes in 'Novato, CA'.
Try searching even surrounding areas of Novato, CA for 'green tea ice cream' dishes.
Try a related search:
Here are some other ideas:
More to explore
Pan or zoom map to change search area.
Wider area: 1 mile
Latest Reviews
"I always get the Royal which has all the meats and its the best I ever had..." — smarshall
"This was amazing!..." — lavender917
"I love this dessert...I always order this when I am at the restaurant...." — jbuo492
Other ideas


text:
Your babies schedule.
I though it would be nice to begin posting our babies schedules once we start to develop one. My daughter is 7 weeks today and I will begin a fairly "strict" schedule beginning...
Started by Callie on 12/15/2009 in October 2009 Mommies
Last update on 02/16/2010 by Vanessa


text:
The 2016 Infiniti Q70L Available near Mercer Island is a long-wheelbase version of Infiniti's bestselling mid-size luxury vehicle. With nearly 6 inches of extra leg room and all the best trappings that Infiniti has to offer, the Q70L's mix of technology, style, and driver-convenient features make it a great pick.
The 2016 Infiniti Q70L Base Model Specs
The 2016 Infiniti Q70L Available near Mercer Island is available with a choice of powertrains, each available as either Rear-wheel or all-wheel drive. The base model is equipped with a 330-horsepower 3.7-liter V6 engine and 7-speed automatic transmission. Base features include dual zone automatic temperature control, a rear view monitor, a 7-inch color info display, SiriusXM satellite radio, leather upholstery, and heated front and rear seats. The driver's seat is 10-way power-adjustable for added comfort. The 3.7 also features SiriusXM Satellite Radio. Infiniti's safety features are advanced, with the Predictive Forward Collision Warning system not only monitoring the speed and proximity of the car in front of it, but of the car in front of that one, as well. The result is a vehicle that is much safer. In addition, the Advanced All Wheel Drive system equipped on AWD Infiniti models closely monitors wheel spin and vehicle speed, and can shift up to 50% of available power to the front wheels, resulting in a car that's much more confident on the road.
Upper Trim Specs for the 2016 Infiniti Q70L Near Mercer Island
The 5.6 and 5.6 AWD trim of the 2016 Infiniti Q70L Available near Mercer Island comes with a more powerful engine: a 5.6-liter V8 with 416 horsepower, for stronger acceleration and a more exciting driving dynamic. Certain other components are upgraded, as well: the 5.6 features an Around View Monitor with Moving Object Detection to help drivers back out of even the trickiest parking places, as well as a front and rear sonar system. The Infiniti Connection telematics system helps keeps you updated during your trip and across devices, and the Infiniti Navigation System can help plan your journey. The Q70L 5.6 also gets climate-controlled front seats for better comfort, and an upgraded Bose 10-speaker premium audio system.
Visit Infiniti of Bellevue located at 11815 N.E. 8th Street in Bellevue, WA 98005, in order to test drive the 2016 Infiniti Q70L Available near Mercer Island. To schedule a test drive you can also give us a call at 888-379-4186. With its added interior space and its excellent technology packages, the Q70L may be a great choice for a luxury sedan.


text:
Note: user account creation on this site has been disabled.
When I was looking for documentation or tutorials on how to create a RESTful WCF service that returns JSON-formatted data, I found lots of partial information and code examples, none of which completely worked. So when I finally figured out how to create it, I decided to write this article for those who may be in the same predicament as me.
This walk-through uses .NET 4.0, and Visual Studio 2010.
Recently I've been taking a closer look at LINQ, or Language-Integrated Query -- a set of C# and Visual Basic features that let you write SQL-like queries against data structures such as arrays or hashtables. I like how it lets you replace loops with just a line or two of code. I will illustrate it here with two simple exercises.
On March 19, 2008 Richard Dawkins, the famous evolutionary biologist and popularizer of science, gave a public lecture at the University of Texas in Austin; it was preceded by a reception hosted by the Center of Inquiry Austin. Though I didn't have a chance to exchange more than a few sentences with Dawkins at the reception, I formed some kind of impression of him as a person. For example, he speaks in perfect phrases and is hip on technology. (Though I bet he would never use the word "hip". :-)) His lecture topics I found familiar, even though I haven't read his books where he expounds on them. I guess I've absorbed his ideas by osmosis. The questions the audience asked revolved around whether atheists should adopt an in-your-face or a conciliatory tone with general public; some of the questions were more unusual. (Would you ask a well-known skeptic to support his reasoning with astrology? :-)) Then someone asked what Dawkins thinks of transhumanist visions. Finally, a concept he wanted us to take away from this lecture, if it was the only thing we would take away: why evolution is NOT equal to random chance.
I was baffled to discover that it's actually not at all easy to reverse the rows of a spreadsheet in Excel. Extensive Googling lead me to some advanced commands where you really had to Know What You're Doing. Since I don't usually Know What I'm Doing in Excel, I wrote a Powershell script to do the same thing. Actually, this script takes any file, reverses it, and writes it to a different file.
Recently I gave a lightning talk, Introduction to Powershell, at All Girl Hack Night, an Austin gathering of women developers. Here are my slides for it. It introduces some nifty features of Powershell by examining a simple use case.
Passing arguments to a Powershell script caused me to pull my hair out... umm, scratch my head, lately. As with most technical problems, it appeared chaotic and intractable at first, and drew me into a black hole of spiraling confusion, where bugs mask other bugs; however, once I found a solution and tried to explain it to myself step-by-step, everything appeared orderly, even trivial. So now I don't even know why I'm writing this down. Actually, I do. It's so as not to go into the same black hole when I have to figure it again months or years from now.
Powershell is powerful. But if you forget that it's a scripting language, and approach it as a programming language, you (like me) may be thrown off, time and time again, by its certain... literalness.
I have a script that reads Powershell variable / value pairs from a file we shall call foo.conf . In other words, foo.conf looks like this:
$var1 = "bla1"
$var2 = "bla2"
$var3 = "bla3"
After reading the contents of this file, it needs to execute those variable assignments. It does it all in this line:
What armchair "scientists" get out of reading popular science magazines or websites? Mostly they get excited about "out there" speculation that gets batted on wired.com or io9.com. Holographic universe. Preferred direction in the universe.
What a real astrophysicist's answer to "what do you think about this?" is: nothing.
There were presentations on everything Drupal-related, from module development to theming, to security, usability, or building large, yet scalable enterprise websites with Drupal. Each of the two days opened with a keynote speech that drew an audience over 300 people into the room. Organizer Todd Nienkirk greeted us with the news that the number of attendees made Drupal Camp Austin the second largest Drupal Camp ever; an hour later, a few last-minute registrations pushed us up to #1.
10 people were at the discussion. Some have heard more about the concept of the Singularity, others less. Moderator Mike Ignatowski described two common Singularity scenarios. They are:
-- "hard takeoff": a computer develops human-level AI, and then within a few hours doubles, quadruples it, etc., and very soon becomes intelligent beyond our comprehension and takes over the world;
-- "soft takeoff" -- technological advance is gradual enough so any given human does not lose comprehension of what's happening; however, in a few hundreds of years the society and technology nonetheless changes so much that it's incomprehensible to a modern-day human.
We examined some of those scenarios and objections to them.


text: What would be the best way to go about reloading functions from an official addon to contain some modifications? For example, I've made some changes to to import_x3d.py to add some object properties for downstream scripting. While I don't have a problem with modifying that file directly on my system, I would like to be able to give my addon to someone else without them having to go through the trouble of finding the system files to make those changes. Not sure of a straightforward way to do local reloading of the addon but pointing to a different version of the modified file. Thoughts?


text:
Table of Contents
Cell Phone Booth
Howdy from the Cell phone Booth. (Cell phone Required)
The Cell phone booth is actually about 10 miles south of the airport. It is a metal chair held down by rocks. It is 1.5 miles from my residence. I ride my bike, run or ski there almost everyday to make phone calls. Whooter(Computer Ed)12-22-2005
This is where I am…Computer Ed 01/16/2006
Hello Computer Ed!
Can you mark the cell phone booth on the map? And, how do you keep the booth warm in the winter? — eteam 2006/01/16 16:30
Gotcha! Cell phone booth location is now shown…
This is how I look after a midnight ride to the Cell phone Booth. As you can see you do not keep the cell phone booth warm. Ya keep yourself warm…:) Computer Ed 01/17/2006
Hello Computer Ed, we just got a call from Tower Control, that you will board a plane and turn into a departing passenger. What's your destination? And what about your jobs at the airport? Who will lead passengers to the cell phone booth and who is going to take care of all thatcomputer stuff? — eteam 2006/01/31 20:18
I will only be 3 hrs away via internal combustion vehicle…45 min. as the crow fies..:) Grantsville, Utah. Thanks to our wonderful technology today, I will only need to maintain most equipment once a month. I can monitor and control all systems from anywhere…I will also maintain the cell phone booth once a month as well.(I will make sure the wind or cows don't knock the metal chair over.)..Ha ha ha..At this time I have not departed or even packed my luggage…I am neither here nor there at this time…Computer Ed - Feb. 11, 2006 - 5:31pm
It's only 45 min. as the crow flies to Grantsville Utah, but a crow can't even fligh high enough to make it over Pilot Peak, which seems to sit between Montello and Grantsville like a road block. So, let's say: bad weather, weak signals, shaky powerlines and an emergency situation at the IAM tech department. The problem can't wait 3 hours to get fixed in person. What are our options?
I have chosen a alternative solution. I have created a robot. It looks alot like me. It has my voice. It is programmed with my technical knowledge and can perform any technical task. I can even operate it remote control. It has a camera so I view things from it's point of view. It only needs a place to plug in it so it can maintain its charge when not needed…Computer Ed…April, 12, 2006 10:30pm
One Way to get to the Cell Phone Booth
The Lazy way to the cell phone booth. Security Dog to guide the way. 100 miles per gallon!
IAM wind helmet and jacket fully functional. It brought a big smile to the HMB Pilots face!
What is a HMB Pilot? Never heard of one before. Is it the term used for a special Cellphone booth driver? Hajoe 04.21.06
HMB stands for Honda Mini Bike. Anyone can be a HMB pilot..even children as small as 5. Taking flight however does take a little practice! :)
HMB Pilot in Flight!!! Warning: Flight is for Master HMB Pilots Only!
I love you Mom! I have to go. I see incoming flights! Have a great day! Talk to ya again soon! Yes, mother I will clean behind my ears and always wear clean underware….bye bye luv you too..
Cell Phone Booth Upgrade
On May 22, 2006 I made a small upgrade to the cell phone booth. The upgrade provides shade and shelter from the rain. It also makes the Cell Phone Booth much easier to find. The Cell phone booth is becoming popular with ATV riders and cowboys with Cell phones. I tested it today very nice. Junior and Sweety really enjoyed it after chasing squirrels all the way there! Computer Ed - May 23, 2006 - 9:07 pm
June 6, 2006
Camp Out at the Cell Phone Booth
Junior, Sweety and I will be camping out at the cell phone booth this evening. Camp out will start around 6:30 PM IAM time. Anyone who would like to join in is Welcome! There are even a couple of extra tents at The Horshoeflats Old Motel if anyone would like to use them. If not Junior, Sweety, the coyotes, antelope, squirrels, rabbits owls and I will enjoy the desert solitude together.
For those of you who have my Cell Phone Number. Give me a call or send a text to me after 6:30 pm Pacific time!
Talk at ya there Later!
Computer Ed
urban cellphone booth
Just found this version of a cellphone booth. Obviously a way more claustrophobic version than the plain air version.
— hajoe 2006/06/13 11:50
original can be found here
Traveling to the Cell Phone Booth I AM. I AM sure it needs some maintanence I AM. Photos and Video of the Journey will be coming soon! Computer Ed, Sweety, Junior and P.M.C.S system too!! Live from the Cell Phone Booth. See keep an I on this page.. Very soon it will change..


text:
Author has written 2 stories for Inuyasha.
What's up guys! Here's the Facts.
Name: Jessica (Joanna, Jo)
Age: 14
Gender: Female (thankfully)
Personality: Raw,Loner,Wild,Protective,Oversensative,Loveable,Open, and Artistic
Hobbies: Drawing,Playing Videogames,Painting,Writing,Watching TV,Listening to Music, Playing Guitarand making my plans for the future
Fav. Tv shows: Anything Anime, X Play, Kept, Realworld, RoadRules, Inferno, Boy Meets World+ more butI won't bore you with all of them.
Fav.Foods: Tacos, and Cheesecake
Fav. Music: Slipknot,Breaking Benjamen,System of a Down,Linkin Park,Britney Spears,Ciara,J.Lo,Beyonce,Pussycat Dolls,Usher,50Cent, and More!
Pairings: Sesshomaru/Kagome,Kouga/Ayame,Miroku/Sango,Anakin/Padme,Kai/Rei,Spike/Faye,Hiei/Botan Etc.
Fav. Characters: Envy,Lust,Ed,Kikyo,Kanna,Sesshomaru,Kouga,Aisha,Suzuka,Gene,B.T.,Crim,Sukasa,Sora,
Listen I could keep Going and Going but I'm going to stop myself.
Stories I've Wrote: None so far
JUST SO YOU KNOW I tend to get off the subject and totally forget what I'm talking about.
Bye Bye People That's All I Gotta Say!
Or is it?


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ROCKY HILL, Conn. (WTNH)– Three students and a school staff member was taken to the hospital after a school bus crash on I-91 in Rocky Hill, Wednesday.
East Haven Superintendent says 6th graders from Joseph Melillo Middle school were heading to the CT Science Center in Hartford on a class field trip when the accident happened.
The superintendent said the students were traveling on three busses when she's been told that a tractor trailor struck a car and then the car hit the bus.
Three students have been taken to Connectict Children's Medical Center and one staff member was taken to Hartford Hospital. Their injuries are reportedly non-significant.
The two busses that were not impacted continued on to the Science Center. The involved bus has taken the students on it back to the school. Parents of all involved have been notified and the trip for the students on the bus will be rescheduled.
One of the four lanes on I-91 northbound was shut down around the accident just before exit 23. The accident scene has been cleared.
The accident is under investigation.


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Cat Mate Water Fountain is an innovative drinker for cats and small dogs. The fountain's unique design will maximise the appeal of drinking, incorporating a circulation feature to prevent water becoming stagnant and stale, as well as multi-height drinking levels to appeal to cats of all ages. The fountain is made from easy clean, dishwasher safe bowls and comprises a noiseless operation system and in-built carbon filter to purify water continually, keeping it fresh, cool and filtered.
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Boss Cool After Halsey Horror Show-Not So The Fans
Take a look at any of the Nottingham Forest fan sites today and they are for once unanimous on one thing....their condemnation of the match officials, in the 4-1 defeat at Leeds. The message boards can be a messy place after any defeat, where feelings and emotions can often get out of hand, but the anger and frustration following the game at Elland Road on Saturday, seems to have hit new highs (or lows depending on your views).
Forest fans have been hammering away at their keyboards since the moment Simon 'Larry' Grayson dived into referee Mark Halsey's pocket to issue the red card to Cohen and they haven't stopped since. Chris Cohen's red card, for what Halsey perceived as a dangerous tackle, was greeted with disbelief by most people who saw the game and virtually everyone who watched the TV replays umpteen times, from every conceivable angle and in slow mo and in HD (such is the way of the modern world).
Despite the outrage being vented by supporters, manager Billy Davies was perhaps being a little more restrained. He refused to be drawn on his opinion of the Halsey horror show and in particular, the incident that saw Chris Cohen sent off.
Davies told the official site that he was proud of the lads and the performance they gave. 'It is a pity the game didn't stay 11 versus 11 because we totally dominated the first half, we created chances and severely restricted theirs and we didn't get what we deserved from the game. I am very proud of the players, they showed they are a side not lacking in confidence, they were very positive and energetic.'


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Cyber-psychologist Berni Goode talking about Flow on Charlie Brooker's How Videogames Changed the World.
Flow is extremely important. So, so important.
It's what keeps some people sane. It's what drives the world's most skilled and accomplished athletes, the most intense gamers, the hardcore hobbyists, even many of the most talented artists, musicians and actors – flow is what you get when unstoppable drive meets an unflinching will and unlimited dedication.
Flow is being utterly, truly "in the zone". And it's one of the most amazing feelings there is.
This is why finding a sport, or a hobby, or a martial art, or a handicraft, or a new video game, or any skill-based activity that uses focus and requires practice and repetition is so beneficial for things like depression and anxiety and overall mental/physical well-being.


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Coalition guns for Labor on Iraq, tax
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In the shadow of polls signalling fading support for the Federal Government, the Prime Minister, John Howard, and his frontbench are now moving aggressively to expose what they believe are soft spots in Labor Party policies on the crucial issues of the budget and Iraq.
Mr Howard yesterday seized on the fatal bomb blast near Australia's mission in Baghdad to attack the "ludicrous, insane" pledge by the Opposition Leader, Mark Latham, to withdraw Australia's troops from Iraq.
And in question time yesterday, the Treasurer, Peter Costello, scorned the "magic pudding" budgetary policies of Labor's pledge to collect less tax, spend more and produce bigger surpluses.
Mr Costello, referring to a column by the Herald's economics editor, Ross Gittins, said that if Labor was serious about spending more it would abandon the second tranche of tax cuts for higher income earners taking effect in 2005-06.
"The Labor Party, if elected, is entitled to take back those tax cuts . . . You did it in 1993 and you can do it again," he said.
Mr Costello was joined by the Education Minister, Brendan Nelson, who dismissed Labor's education spending as "a con", claiming a $377 million shortfall in its higher education funding plan, a claim dismissed by Labor which said its package was worth $2.43 billion compared to the Government's $1.7 billion.
The Health Minister, Tony Abbott, also attacked Labor's health policy as a "great . . . rip-off" and said the Coalition was spending more on health.
Mr Abbott said that Labor's policy would mean higher health costs. Labor's promise to scrap the safety net introduced in the new Medicare measures would cut $324 million out of government spending and would hit the sickest people in the community.
On the Iraq blast, the Foreign Minister, Alexander Downer, produced a letter written yesterday by his top official, Ashton Calvert, stating that in the current circumstances the protection provided to the mission by Australian soldiers was an "essential" safety measure.
The car bomb, triggered 100 metres from the Australian Representative Office on Tuesday, killed a boy and injured four others but caused no Australian casualties.
The 86-strong Australian Defence Force contingent's main role is to protect the nine Australian officials based at the office. "If the ADF security contingent were withdrawn, there would be no available alternative arrangement that could provide the same level of security," Dr Calvert told Mr Downer in his letter.
The minister produced the letter after Labor's foreign affairs spokesman, Kevin Rudd, said a Labor government would seek appropriate security advice about protecting Australian officials in Baghdad.
Mr Downer told Parliament it would be "risible" and "an extraordinary piece of hypocrisy" to think a Labor government, having withdrawn troops, would ask the Americans for protection.
Mr Howard also jumped on the bombing as demonstrating the need for protection and highlighting the "ludicrous, insane idea" of pulling troops out.
But Mr Rudd accused Mr Howard of "hyperventilating" in a domestic political attack when the incident required sober discussion.
Mr Rudd said it was surprising that Mr Downer had dragged his departmental secretary into what was a political debate.
But Dr Calvert in his letter had referred to "current circumstances" and any decision by Labor in government would be based on the security position at that time, Mr Rudd said.


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I'll make a rare exception to our no-vintage-accident-photos rule today with this Los Angeles Examiner photo of the traffic backup caused by what appears to be a single-car accident on the median of the Hollwyood Freeway at Alvarado Street (from the Rosemont Avenue overpass) on February 9, 1960. It seems like the backup isn't so much the result of rubberneckers as it is the police officers holding up traffic so the emergency responders can get to the scene. What do you see here?
The Ubiquitous 57 Chevy, you can even recognize it when it is upside down. I like the row with a 59 Olds up front, followed by a Jaguar, 55/56 Packard, Bathtub Nash, probably a Cadillac, followed by 59 Chevy and then a 59 Ford.
Near the tractor-trailer's rear, I can see a Jaguar MkII. Can't tell if the light colored small car in the far left lane is a Fiat or early Datsun.
Madoc is close. The small light colored car, 2 cars ahead of the semi truck is a Fiat 1100.
There´s another one on the left of the second fire truck.
Seems as if the ambulance (Chevy?) nearest the camera is getting a jump from one of the wreckers (also a Chevy?).
The Ambulance with the hood up looks kind of Fordy to me.
Definitely a Ford, 1955-60 vintage.
It's a `58 Panel Delivery.
Kind of a strange scene! Four tow trucks on hand, an ambulance apparently getting a jump start, not one but two Fiat 1100s (I'm guessing the Caddy behind the white one had preexisting body damage since the Fiat appears intact), and what I hope is not a body covered up in the median next to the overturned car. And if I'm sitting in the '59 Olds or the Jag Mk II behind it, for instance, I'm wondering why my side is being held up.
I count Five tow trucks… 2 are nose to nose just past the overturned car.
I cant tell what car that is on its roof; Im thinking the driver walked away from this one, although he didn't exactly make any friends that day. On the left, a `56 Eldorado Biarritz with a badly mangled front end; makes me shutter. Is that a Fiat 1100 in front of it? To the right of the semi in the foreground I spot a nice `57 Plymouth Suburban wagon in front of the black `57 Poncho & `59 Caddy Here again, I wish I could go back in time to that year to buy a new car. I'd get a 300F convertible.
It's also amazing to see the current-day GOOGLE view! Look how the vegetation filled in all the open spots of the original pic!
Not one but two Fiat 1100's, one in front of the Cadillac, and another dark colored one next to the Fire Truck. Also see a Dodge COE truck in front of a bullet nosed Studebaker.
A Fiat-eating, '56 Eldorado (large fins) at upper left?
And, an American LaFrance that might date to the mid-'30's.
Nope. Both fire trucks on the scene are "L" series Macks that could date from anytime between 1940 and 1953.
Being a vintage Volkswagen fan/owner/builder, I make it my personal mission to find every VW possible in these daily vintage photos. If anyone cares to review the older daily vintage photos, you'll begin to notice them and it becomes difficult to find one without a VW in it. I think this is as early as I've been able to spot a VW Beetle. (1960)
The car upside down, appears to be a late 50s Rambler, and at 500%, there are more damaged cars on the frontage ramp. The fire trucks are Mack A models, I believe. The Ford ambulance is getting a jump start (what luck) and not much has changed. When I was out there in spring, this was an everyday occurrence. The police cars look like Mercs ,as keeping with the Ford theme.
True, Howard. What looks like a '55 Chevy over there has a pronounced list to port, but both fire trucks are Mack "L" models.
Thanks Gene, I knew they were Macks, but the lettering escapes me, except for B models, my favorite Mack!
Howard, the police cars parked on the right shoulder are a `59 (front) and a `57. CHP used Mercury Monterey base model 2drs. in `57 and `58, but not the city fleets.
Between the 57 & 59 Ford Squads are 2 58 Chevrolets.
Lots of convertibles, none with the top down. Seems odd.
What is the guy in the suit doing standing on top of the overturned '57 Chevy?
Alas, 1960 and still no Squarebirds in sight. My 1960 came from LA, but wasn't built until June, otherwise it might have been in the shot.
One bullet-nose Stude to the left of the logging truck. I can't make out the model year. Al?
Salguod, There's a squarebird way in the back, two cars in front of the COE truck. Bert
You're right! Good catch, I missed it, even at full resolution.
I feel better now. 😀
It is a 1950, from the grilles. 1951 grilles were flush with the sheetmetal where 1950 grilles were recessed.
A couple of more interesting oddballs : the Jaguar sedan directly behind the crunched Cadillac and a '57 Dodge COE straight truck in the same neighborhood. And yeah, it might have had a Hemi.
Hi Gene, you seem to know your trucks, I love trucks, I know the truck pulling the doubles is a K-Whopper, the GMC could be a cab-forward, and next to it, a Ford F series, ( F-900?), but can't tell what is next to the KW, White or IH, and looks like a Mack or KW "bullnose" cabover way back. What do you think?
The police cars on the ramp are a '55/'56 Ford, two '58 Chevies and a '59 Ford.
you missed the `57 Ford Custom sedan nearest the camera.
Hey 68, I thought they might be '58 Chevies too, but at 500%, the taillight looks like part of the fin, like late 50s Mercs. Anybody?
ONE AT A TIME ,ONE AT A TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My last comment said Web page unavailable. Thanks everyone, by the time I post a comment, 5 more come in. I can imagine the chaos in the editorial dept. And BTW Daniel, and pardon my newness, but why don't you show vintage accident scenes?
I'm not a sadist, but do like NASCAR crashes, but not drag racing crashes.
The car in its roof is a 1957 Chevrolet 4 door sedan, appears to be a bel-air no less.
The person size blanket laying in the median in front of the car is not a good sign.
Looks like a man in a suit is wheeling a stretcher in front of the combination truck. Coroner or Undertaker?
The car in its roof is a 1957 Chevrolet 4 door sedan, appears to be a bel-air no less.
The person size blanket laying in the median in front of the car is not a good sign.
Looks like a man in a suit is wheeling a stretcher in front of the combination truck. Coroner or Undertaker?
The 1959 Ford Station Wagon in front of all the police cars has lettering on the tailgate. My guess is it is a Coroner wagon.
The reason for all the wreckers? It used to be the police would call for a wrecker over the radio, the first wrecker to respond would get the tow. So they probably all raced to the scene, and decided to hang out and watch.
The man on top of the 1957 Chevy is probably a detective, he is looking at evidence on the bottom side of the car.
With a roll over accident the driver was probably thrown out of the window and smashed by his or her own car.
Cord, you're most likely correct as to how the driver died. Back then, no seat belts, and at a 45-degree angle, you were tossed out the nearest door glass. If lucky you were thrown clear, but often you only got half-way out, and crushed as the car rolled. Not pretty by any means…
I think this shot was taken at the end of the clean up. You have numerous cars pulled over, minor damage, witnesses? Removing the rollover (and whatever the the aformentioned tarps were concealing) would be the last part. One simple rollover then and now wouldn't have scrambled that many vehicles.
Hi gary, I beg to differ, when I was there in spring, when this happens (every day, seriously), the tow truck(flatbed) drivers are out for blood. Must be first one on the scene gets the tow, or something, it was just mass confusion, matter of fact, you do better on surface streets than the freeway. Terrible place to drive!
Howard,point well taken. I have gone to L.A. on business numerous times over the years and still have no understanding of that culture. Here, if there is a fatality the coroner has to sign off on the directly involved vehicles before their moved. Non fatal "collatoral damage " is quickly moved out of the way. I saw the ambulance getting a jump as another little piece of evidence of how old this accident site was. Time to go watch another "Columbo".
The tow trucks are from Viertel's Automotive, which in 1960 was (and still is) the LAPD Official Police Garage (and now CHP tow) for that area. At that time, LAPD handled all freeways within LA City limits, CHP didnt take over until 1969 when the Central LA office (of CHiPs fame) opened.
Having worked at an OPG tow company at that time, I could say with certainty that those tow units were on scene right away, as it was common for tow trucks, (police and bandits alike) to monitor LAPD radio traffic, which at that time could be received at the top of the AM dial on any radio. Once a crash came out on the air, you would scramble any truck you could spare to get there before the bandit tows could sweet talk the owner into a deal. The tow trucks on the shoulder could be backup from a neighboring LAPD division tow, AAA tow, or perhaps even bandit tows or "Bird-Doggers" as we call them, hustling for a repair shop. Can't do that anymore as it is now a misdemeanor for wreckers to stop at the scene of an accident without being summoned.
One last point, in 1960 how long would it take to get a chopper with a camera crew in the air? Look at the shadow from the officer on the right, this shot was not taken from an overpass.
TV news crews in choppers in `60 were scarce I bet. That became more popular later in the decade. It would be one well-heeled TV station to have their own chopper back then. The U-2 spy plane pilot that was captured in 1960 ended up getting killed in a copter crash working for a TV station in CA. in 1977. Ironic..
Yes, that would be my namesake Gary Powers. In 1969 I had some friends in the Dells (wisconsin). One girl's father had a motel, amusement park and helecopter tours. In order to keep up his license he needed to log hours with a passenger. I was willing to oblige and got to know this Korean vet quite well.
Little "Mash" type Bells were pretty common.
u2,bono,the edge,larry mullen jr and adam clayton. U2 !
Hey, isn't that Broderick Crawford is the dark suit standing next to the wreck? And, I think that's Eric Estrada directing traffic just in front of the Jag !!!!!!
Good one! I always noted on easy it was for cars to just roll over on CHiPs. Of course, it was all rigged, but what a hoot – side swipe a 1969 Chrysler Newport with a 1970 Nova at 10 MPH and the Nova is rolling!
EE would have been about 10 or 11 at the time – so he could have been there.
LOL–Eric Estrada would've been about 4 when this shot was taken!
Mr Estrada was born March 16, 1949 in Harlem.
Hey Guys, Gimme a break…….I'm driving with a "Poetic License" on this one……. LOL
Let's see what we can deduce from the crime scene photo. The skid marks end abruptly right where the 2 cops are directing traffic. The cars on the off-ramp may well have been involved or witnessed. With that said, the way the 57 Chevy has ended up, it would have had to roll headfirst to land as it did if the impact was where the skid marks end, and the driver or passenger would probably have been ejected away from our view, so the tarp may not be covering a victim, unless that was a pedestrian that started the whole mess. I am wondering what the light streaks are from that are under the feet of the cop in the center?
I don't think this was a single car accident. There's a 55 Chevy on the far right between the two wreckers that is leaning to the left and appears to have the hood bunched up, looks more like one car crossed the median and they had a head on. Maybe the Caddy with the bashed up grill nudged the 57 Chevy into oncoming traffic…. hm…
Two Fiat 1100s! And two Beetles.
A 1950 bullet-nosed Studebaker and a 1955 Packard! I'm happy! 😀
Too bad for the owner/driver of the '57 Chevy. 🙁
Is the policeofficer on the right front , about to fall over ?
I'm guessing the no-go on accident photos, especially of a potential fatality, is out of respect to people who may be emotionally involved with the victims.
The '57 Pontiac (in the right foreground) could be a CHP runout. It's a dark color (black?), has two door handles (coupe?),
and appears to have dual spotlights. The Patrol purchased both Pontiac Chieftains and Dodge Coronets in 1957, and they most likely would have been retired by the time this picture was taken.


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ANCHORAGE - The high cost of heating oil prices has some homeowners in the Matanuska-Susitna Borough turning to coal.
Houston homeowner Roger Purcell used his family's state energy rebate money to buy a coal stove after a fill-up of his heating oil tanks took a big bite out of his bank account.
"We're hoping to cut our fuel cost this year in half of what we had last year," Purcell said. "For the price and the reduction of fuel, it made it very cost efficient - just in the first month in a half, the furnace will pay for itself."
Purcell had been skeptical about using coal.
"I remember as a kid we used to always have the old 55-gallon drum in my grandfather's shop out here when he was running the tractors," he said. "And he'd bring the big chunks of coal in, throw the wood, throw it in there. Of course it leaked and it smoked and it smelled, and so I was like, 'I don't want coal in my house, I don't want that dirty stuff around and the smell and having to shovel it out."'
A neighbor helped him change his mind.
"I was just joking around with him and I said, 'Well how much did you spend last year?' He said, 'I only went through about 500 gallons for the winter,' and that stopped me dead in my tracks," Purcell said.
Walt and Dody Clifford built their home last year and decided to install a coal stove because of the lack of wood in Houston.
"Coal will outlast wood probably 2-to-1, I would say," Walt Clifford said.
The Cliffords also have an oil furnace but use the coal stove as their primary heat source in a nearly 3,000-square-foot home. They use about five tons of coal and paid $200 a ton for their supply this year.
Coal is cheaper, but there's work involved.
Walt Clifford transfers coal from a nearby shed to the front porch and uses coffee cans to keep from touching it while feeding the stove.
The Cliffords were surprised to see what little mess it makes.
"You get a little dust from the ashes when you clean the ashes out," Walt Clifford said.
Rick Dilley, owner of Cozy Coal, said coal has a bad reputation.
"I tell 'em it's not like what you see in the old western movies," Dilley said.
Coal burns more efficiently than wood, Dilley said, and it's far cheaper than heating oil.
Dilley burned firewood until he learned about coal and it motivated him to get in to the business.
"I consider coal 80 percent easier than firewood," he said. "We know what the coal is going to be like, firewood you never know what you're going to get, really."
Dilley distributes Healy coal. It has been rated the cleanest coal in the nation, he said, because it has low sulfur, which can cause acid rain and other environmental problems.
"People have a misconception about coal," Dilley said. "Especially new clean-burning technology - (it's) not the fuel of the past, it's the fuel of the future."
Not everybody is happy to see expansion of coal use.
"It's important that they look at what the impacts of that decision might be to them and to other people around," said Mat-Su resident Tim Leach, organizer of the Alaska Coal Working Group.
Emissions from burning coal have nitrogen oxides, the culprit for smog, Leach said. Even before it's burned, he said, coal can cause health problems.
"Particulates even before burning coal - as you're handling it, as you're moving the coal from wherever you're extracting it to the location you're storing it on your property - is something there," Leach said.
Though coal from Healy has been rated the cleanest, Leach said, that does not mean it doesn't contain harmful particulate and emissions.
"But we still at this point have extraordinarily expensive energy costs," Leach said. "We need something that produces clean and reliable power, and coal isn't going to be that source whether it's at the residential level or at the utility level."
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According to some sources, the Samsung
SPH-D600 will actually be known as the Samsung Conquer 4G and if Sprint
sticks to their release schedule we should be seeing this device hit the
shelves on July 24th.
It will be running on a 1GHz Snapdragon processor, and Android's Gingerbread 2.3.3, and features WiMax connectivity and a physical QWERTY keyboard.
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Every now and again, when I duck into Mimi Maternity or Pea in a Pod I run into another pregnant lady (I know, who'd have thought it?). The sort of pregnant lady that makes me gnash my teeth and drool in her direction (she's probably all, who let Crazy McFat Pants out of her cage?).
Because while I've looked about 6 months pregnant since day 4 or 5, my rolls getting rolls on top of even more love handles, my cellulite now covering me in some sort of bizarre pregnancy suit, my bra stretching and groaning uncomfortably against my saggy boobs, she serenely pats her tiny belly as she confides in the salesclerk that she's due any day now.
I pray feverishly as I peer between the racks of clothing to find something that's decidedly more flattering to the figure (what figure? I look like an olive on toothpicks) than what I'm wearing, that she's about to divulge that this is her first baby or something, anything to make me feel better about myself and my ham-hock arms at 4 and a half months along, before she then mentions that this is her fifth baby.
She looks so put together, so firm and taut in her ass and thighs, obviously she hadn't gained a pound over the recommended whatever it is you're supposed to gain, while I? I look like I rolled out of bed, snapped on a bra, pulled my hair back and then went out in public. Which is precisely what I did.
And I am jealous. I'd love to be a svelte and sexy pregnant lady, gaining the tiniest amount of weight in my belly only rather than turning my ass into a shelf and my face into a moon pie. Ain't gonna happen in THIS lifetime, sister.
When I had my first baby, I got hungry. I put my eatin' pants on and I ate pretty much anything and everything I could get my grubby mitts on. I ate at least 2-3 times what I was supposed to eat, washing down every meal with a milkshake or three while I munched candy bars I hadn't eaten in years.
Sure, I knew I was gaining weight, so I eventually just asked the nurse not to tell me what the scale said when I stepped onto it. There was no law saying I had to KNOW how fat I'd gotten, right? Besides, I'd just breastfeed it off later, I told myself.
Ben, who unbeknown to me at the time was autistic, refused to get anywhere near my massive mammeries once I popped him out, and after a spell of pumping he became a formula baby.
Fast forward 5 years. I've taken off the weight, however painfully, and am now pregnant with Alex. I have made precisely one promise to myself: I wasn't going to become a fat ass when I got pregnant again.
Morning sickness, then hyperemesis struck, and even as I purged whatever molecules of food from my system, I watched horrified as the scale went up. Between 5-9 weeks, I gained 11 pounds. I ate nothing, threw up so hard that my nose was permanently bleeding and I gained weight.
Once I was able to hold down food again (around 18 weeks and 25 pounds heavier), I ate well. I ate so well that people couldn't believe how fat I was getting. Egg whites, tofu, veggies, fruits. Small portions eaten often. And yet I found myself on the delivery table having gained 56 pounds. A mere 10 pounds lighter than when I'd had Ben.
(as an aside, it hurt me to no end that only The Daver believed me that I wasn't secretly gorging upon hostess products and lard at night and while he was at work. Everyone else seemed to believe that I was lying for some reason, and was just ashamed of my weight gain. While I was TOTALLY ashamed, I'd never lie about something like that)
Oh well, I told myself, at least I'd breastfeed it off with this one. Alex was a champion nurser, nursed often and with gusto, and I knew I'd be back into my size 6's in no time.
Go ahead, laugh away. I won't blame you.
Turns out that no matter what LLL tells you, not EVERYONE loses weight while breastfeeding. Just wanted to be clear here, because I seriously wish like hell that anyone had told me this before I nearly killed myself trying to get this weight off.
So when I got pregnant with The Sausage, I made a vow to myself to eat what I want and enjoy it without feeling guilty about any weight gains I've had. My body does apparently like to pack on the pounds while pregnant, so why fight it? It's not worth it to beat myself up over every single pound.
And so far? I've not gained an insane amount of weight for someone almost 18 weeks pregnant. Which shocks the shitballs out of me. Who knew that I just needed to let go and eat pretty much any and everything that I can find? My week's menu reads just like the Very Hungry Caterpillar, and I'm loving every second of it.
Who the hell knew?
So dish. Tell me about YOUR pregnancy weight gain. Please tell me I'm not alone in reaching epic blimp-like proportions while pregnant. Or if I am, will you pass the ketchup and chocolate. Aunt Becky is ready for her 1st dinner.
53 Responses to Color Me Fatty McBoob
I gained only 23 pounds when I was pregnant, but I doubt I will get so lucky again!
Well, I never had a baby, but I can promise you that if I ever DO, I will gain lots of weight, just for you! Actually, judging by my mom and my sister, and then also by my body's natural talent for turning veggies and egg whites into body fat, I am sure to be a huge pregnant woman. If, that is, I am able ever to get pregnant in the first place. If not, I imagine I will be fat anyway, at some point, again, because right now I'm starving myself to fit into a size eight, and my body doesn't like it.
37 lbs with the first, and 50 with the second! I always wished for that look too, just a belly bump. Alas, that was not to be. Also, my head got really big (at least to me).
Lost the weight with the first one, but my youngest is now 6 and I'm still carrying the "baby" weight!
p.s. This is my first time ever to comment on a blog. I'm shy that way 😉
Since this is my first baby, I don't have any pregnancy-weight-gain horror stories to make you feel better. Nor have I gained a lot of weight yet. About 5 pounds and I'm 15 weeks. Sorry! But I will join you in the milkshake drinking and try to catch up. Yum………
During Bella's pregnancy? Fine. Perfect. Lost everything, lost final few AFTER ceasing bf'ing. (I think nature keeps a few extra ones on during bf'ing actually, in case you get stuck in the cave for a few days without a mammoth to eat. Just sayin'.)
Looked great. Felt great.
Maddy? Couldn't exercise. Felt like shit. gained weight looking at food. gained 10 more pounds than I did with Bella.
Am now, 18m later, 18 lbs overweight. And I look pregnant. It sucks. Hell, I'M jealous of those pregnant women you describe because they probably look better than ME. Yeesh.
Well, I lost 15 pounds. Finally gained back 5. Then pre-e struck.
Gained 30 pounds in 5 days. . . .
well– I gained 30 with my first and took off 20 of it — then gained 20 and took off ten… you do the math– Damn those doctor's for being right about keeping ten of each pregnancy! Damn Damn Damn
3 babies — all 15 months apart — delivered them all at a whopping 185 lbs — gained 55 with the first, 50 with the second, and 45 with the third — breastfeeding makes teenaged boys in taco bell who have to witness older siblings ripping the covert boob cover blanket away in order to speed trip to zoo lose weight — it does not help my fat ass dwindle in the least. My children are all teenagers now – I am still overweight and btw, I started my marriage at 110 lbs — I hope this man loves me as much more now as I've gained!
Oh, I got huge when I was pregnant. Especially with the third child who weighed in at over 10 pounds at birth. Yes. That was fun. But I always lost it all and am not a huge woman now.
Enjoy eating. Take lots of walks. Be happy.
This time I am living large, 40 pounds gained and holding. At least 15 of those pounds are in my face. ugh. I never lose any weight while breastfeeding. With my first and second, I continually gained until I weaned them. (LONG after)
Damn hormones.
This post spoke my language. I am a whopping 5 feet tall. I weighed about 100 pounds soaking wet before I was pregnant. Then I gained 45 pounds when I was pregnant with Bird. That's almost HALF my body weight for those of you who are as bad at math as I am. I considered maternity pants to be buffet pants. Damn, wish I still had some. Anyway, I quickly lost the weight thanks to long, long walks. Then 13 months later I was pregnant again with Deal. 45 pound weight gain again. I've since lost it, but the elephant skin on my stomach won't be seeing the light of day anymore. I also got permanent back fat. The good thing is my eyesight improved with each pregnancy so I don't wear glasses anymore. Silver lining, right? Yeah, I'd honestly rather have the glasses and no back fat.
40 here, and 35 of it is still hanging out on my right ass cheek… ok both cheeks, but that one looks bigger!!
And my retarded ass is trying to get Pregnant again!! Think I can break 250 with this one??? Geez, I freaking hope not, there isn't much self esttem left in me!!
Hang in there, maybe this being so different means that the Sausage isn't a sausage at all!!!!
50+lb (I stopped counting after tipping the scales at 205lb) w/ Woggie. This time, w/ Bug, 32lb. Had not even lost Bug's birth weight when I left the hospital. Now tell me how that happens?
I was a big gainer, too. # 1 – gained 65, # 2 – gained 60, #3 – gained 60. Managed to lose all the weight plus a few with #1 and #2, but it's been only 3 months since my last baby and I still have 20 lbs to go from that one. This last kiddo is the first I have been able to breastfeed and I haven't lost a bit of weight after the initial shedding of baby/water weight despite going to the gym 5 days a week. I tried cutting my calories to what the "experts" advise for breastfeeding for a week, but my breastmilk production went down and made a very unhappy baby. So I had to start eating more.
Guess I'll have to wait until breastfeeding is over until I seriously try to lose the last of the baby weight.
And I also have the "elephant skin" on my flabby belly. My stretch marks are horrendous. We went to the beach on Labor Day and I was so jealous of all the moms who had nice smooth bellies. Sigh.
I gained 54 pounds with my first. And lost it all. I gained 42 pounds with my second. And lost it all. I only gained 35 pounds with my third, which was my only girl, so I'm going with the other commentor who said this one might not be a sausage after all. And I lost all of the baby weight. However. It took me a looong time and there was no way in holy hell I could get that last 5 (OK 10) pounds off while nursing. NO WAY! I am currently hold on for dear life to my size 6 (OK 8) self. I'm absolutely horrible at self-restraint (hence the 3 children:)).
WTF? That's supposed to say size 8 not 8) I am so bad with computers…
I only gained 5lbs the first 4 months, but as soon as I discovered I was pregnant, I gained weight the next day. I seriously was wearing my regular clothes, then the next day after the doctors appt, I had to go get maternity stuff. It was the happiest day in my life, considering I used to cry when I would pass Motherhood Maternity stores. Then I gained about 30 more lbs. Luckily 8lbs 9ozs was my daughter!
Now my SIL was told by her Dr. that she must gain at least 18lbs-she gained 19-was back in pre-preg clothes in 3 weeks!
Mmm… Moon pie.
I totally hear you on the tiny pregnant ladies. It's just not right. I gained 70 (that's right SEVENTY) pounds with my son. I took a lot of walks during and ate whatever I wanted (why shouldn't I have two lunches? I want chinese and mexican food right now = completely logical) I am 5'11" and weighed 230 at the time of delivery! I breastfed and took a lot of long walks, but honestly the weight didn't come off til I went back to work 6 mos. later. It's been 4 years now and I weigh less than I did before the pregnancy. I guess every body is different.
Gained 50 lbs with my first despite eating well. Lost over 50 lbs in the two weeks after I gave birth (HUH?). Found out afterwards that my mom got so swollen during pregnancy that even her nose gained weight so I guess that part is hereditary for me.
After I lost all that weight, PPD struck (thank you Zoloft, for everything except the weight gain you caused), I had to go back to a busy job where I basically couldn't get up from my desk during the day for six months – I've probably gained 15 lbs. if not more – afraid to get on scale. Now I'm freaking because I look like CRAP (cellulite, love handles, disgusting, had to buy new FAT clothes) and am four weeks pregnant with #2.
Am I ready to gain all that weight again??? NOOOOO! But YESSSS on the baba. Excited about that. Very excited.
1st and only pregnancy. Age 38 at conception, 39 at birth (e.g. Advanced Maternal Age – oh, just suckit you arsehole doctors!). Was "overweight" when I got pregnant so was told to gain no more than 45 pounds. I gained 46.
I ate pretty much whatever I wanted, but really only *craved* three things (which I ate w/ utter abandonment); Fruit, Sushi and Mexican Food. The first two, not so bad. The last one, errrr… well, all I can tell you is that my now very healthy 26 month old LOVES fruit and Mexican Food. LOL.
Lost all 46 pounds within 6 months of baby being born. I didn't do anything special, just ate normal, walked when I could. Since I wasn't able to breastfeed (after a month of trying like hell), I can't attest to how well that works, or doesn't.
But here's the "messed up" thing. In the past year, I've gained all that 46 pounds back! I'm chasing after a toddler, but somehow I'm fat as a barn. The only thing I can attribute that to is that she is a picky eater & oftentimes doesn't eat all her dinner, and since I'm a 41 year old Mama that hates to see perfectly good food go to waste, I'm often eating HER dinner as well as mine.
All I can tell ya mama… is your body knows what you need. And for my friends who have more than one child, they all say each pregnancy was DIFFERENT, though in general they gained more w/ each pregnancy – or at least the weight seemed to come on sooner.
I'm SURE you're beautiful regardless. Even if you don't believe that. And besides, that skinny bitch at Baby Style w/ 5 children? She is a freak of nature and should be shot. Just kidding. Sort of.
Not catsup with chocolate, right?
I am lucky that my cravings are largely fruit, although there is an ice cream and peanut butter issue going on. But, this third pregnancy I feel like I have put on as much weight on my backside as I did on the front.
I worked out like a mofo during my first pregnancy. My husband would come home and find me hoisting myself and my big old pregnancy belly up and down while doing a step aerobics workout. Doing that kept my weight down, so I can't even recall what I gained during that effort. It also meant the baby pretty much flew right out of me without a lot of effort when he finally showed up 11 days late.
I was pretty proud of myself. I was reasonably fit and healthy after delivery. Then a few weeks later, post partem depression hit me hard. I would cry. Then eat. Then cry because I was eating. Over and over and over again. I gained a lot of weight, worked at getting it off half-heartedly, got pregnant again. Lost that baby. Ate some more. Cried some more. Ate and cried some more. Gained some more weight. Got pregnant. Gained. Gained. Gained. Got the doctor lecture. Would leave and cry and eat and cry and eat. When this son was born, I have no idea what I weighed, but it was ugly, I know that. I got diagosed with depression and hypothyroidism. Medicated. Tried to not eat nor cry. Some days worked better than others.
I'm probably still wearing some of the last pregnancy, several years later, but I am not the same as I was then. It does seem like getting it off and such is far, far harder than the work of actually growing a baby, though!
God, I so hear you on those little tiny pregnant chicks. They're the same ones that can afford Petunia Picklebottom diaper bags and McLaren strollers. They also probably have no drugs at birth and fart flowers. I gained 15 with T, and lost 25 after, because I was already overweight, and was scared into submission by the dr. I gained 13 with Alex, BUT had an 8 lb. cyst removed also, so I lost quite a bit. It's all back, with interest, though…and the big problem is that everything has just gone SOUTH. The saggage is horrific.
I gained 60 POUNDS with my first and barely anything with the others… Go figure. I'm adding you to my blogroll now, I thought I already did, but I guess I didn't
I gained 59 pounds when I was pregnant with Monkey and 56 when I was pregnant with Boo. I kept on 10 from each pregnancy (and even though I was technically underweight to begin with and I am at "just the right weight" now – it doesn't make me feel much better about it, BLAH). When I was pregnant with Monkey my doctor was a complete and total BITCH about my weight gain. She kept telling me to eat healthy and not so much and I was barely eating at all by the end because she was making me feel so horrible! I spent SO MANY nights in tears because she made me feel so bad. So when I was pregnant with Boo and she started in on the weight thing I got pissy and yelled at her and she never mentioned it again, haha. Most of that weight went to my ass – none to my boobage (much to Kent's disappointment) – and stayed there. My waist is about the same size but my ass is gigantimongous, haha. Oh well! The kids are worth it. Most of the time. 🙂
I walked everyday, to work, while pregnant w/ my oldest…I still gained 30 lbs, after I lost 6 for being so sick..
of course, I am erm; fluffy, to being with..so I was starting w/ extra padding..lol..
it *could* have been the BK whoppers I craved, and ATE every.damn.day during my last month of work.
and I mean every day. a few times, twice a day…
I'm not a delicate little flower to begin with..so being pregnant, well..it did not help..
eat, be merry, and worry about the weight later..
and learn some Italian evil eye gestures for the skinny little preggos 😉
#1 – I lost 10lbs in the first 20 weeks, then gained it and another 22llbs in the second 20 weeks – Went from 140lbs to 162lbs. Lost it all within 2 weeks of giving birth & then put 10lbs back on while breastfeeding for 4 months.
#2 – Pretty much the exact same pattern except I started at 150lbs & went to 172lbs. Lost it all plus 5lbs within 2 weeks of giving birth. Had gall bladder problems from all the sudden weight loss, had to have gall bladder out at 6 weeks postpartum. Gained back 15lbs while breastfeeding for a year. Apparently breastfeeding gives me the munchies.
#2 is 4.5 years old, I am hovering right around 150lbs. It's not the baby weight that is my problem. It's the breastfeeding weight.
Anytime someone says they will 'lose the weight while breastfeeding' I can't stop giggling to myself. 🙂
Hey Beck,
I gained 50-60 with Elbs despite working out. Then I lost it all but it took 16 months. With the twins i think I gained 50 or so pounds but there was only 6 pounds of baby in there between them. I still haven't lost it and they're 9 months. Can't say I ate well during either pregnancy and can't say I eat well now but I try. Who the hell cares anyway? I looked like a big hot mess pregnant and never had a beach ball belly just looked like a fat trucker lady.
I went from 125 to 175 with the chipmunk. I have skinny T-Rex arms and my belly stays all pert and tiny while my ass and thighs go FUCKING CRAZY as if I'm carrying extra babies in there and they're living on cellulite alone. It's great times.
Well, this is the part where I remind you I wasn't pregnant for long, so don't get mad. I gained about 15 pounds. But I also lost NO WEIGHT breast feeding. In fact, I gained weight. So that was awesome. NOT.
With my first 1st, 3rd & 4th pregnancies, I gained between 60 and 65 lbs, and I kept about 10 lbs from each of those (plus 10 lbs from my second pregnancy, which is the one I lost). With my 5th (and final) pregnancy, I was extremely sick the whole time, and I still gained 35 lbs, but I lost it all and then some because what the doctors assured me was just morning sickness, lasted for another 18 months after birth. Now, that I can eat again, I am happily putting weight back on, and for now, I don't care what the scale says.
With the first, I gained about 50 (thank you preeclampsia for all of your blessings, not the least of which is water weight out the ass) and a good portion was fat. Two weeks postpartum, I was still 20 lbs heavier. It took another 2 long years to lose another ten.
I got pregnant with Beans 10 lbs heavier (a size 8), and somehow managed to only gain 25 lbs. Since then, I've managed to knock off her weight gain plus the extra from the first and some change. Gearing up for numero tres, I suppose. Rollercoaster anyone?
I'm 5'2, so I look like I'm living large from about month two onward. I had people's eyes bulging when I was four months telling them I had another four or five to go.
I gained 65 lbs with the first kid . My B+ and 1/2 boobs ballooned up like the Hindenberg. I actually slammed the car door on them once…that was pretty.
The second one, I gained about 30 lbs. I had her at 41, so I didn't really give a shit at that point.
At my age, I never was a size 6 – so I never will be…so be it. I secretly (well, not so secretly) hate those preggos in bikinis and juicy couture sweats …
After 45- it's all downhill anyway.
I was so very large, especially with my first one, when I drank whole milk and adored looking the part.
And then near the end, my ankles, hands and face swelled up so much I gained 7 pounds in one week.
Edema sucks ass.
(I didn't do pregnancy well, so what do I know? Hope you are managing better than I did.)
Oh, dear – please don't throw a lard-log at me, but…I lost weight. Fifty pounds.
In part, it was the fact that I had to severely regulate what I ate or end up with a malformed kid – high blood sugars do terrible things to a foetus.
In part, it was the exploding appendix, which sent me to the ER after three days of intense…discomfort…for hours of testing that left the crew baffled and meant an exploratory laparosomethingoranother, which finally let them see the exploded appendix all over my innards and meant a week of recovery with…ugh…hospital food! Oh, and almost no pain meds because I didn't want my baby to be affected. Bastards didn't tell me the meds wouldn't hurt the kid.
I did balloon up at the end – the kid was over ten pounds and over twenty-one inches long (but not fat…he was actually skinny when he came out…eek!)(I didn't have a baby – I had a toddler!) and I had about twice the usual amniotic fun happening. Heh…I lost thirty pounds just having the wee lad!
No worries, though – I packed it all back on when post-partum force me (at gunpoint, I swear) to eat two or three Whitman's sampler boxes (the one pound ones) a week, along with chips, thousands of Rollos a day, and buttered butter for snacks between gorging.
I bet you're beautiful.
Shade and Sweetwater,
Well, hate me if you must, but I lost seven pounds in the first three months and only gained a total of 20 the whole time. I lost it in two weeks while breastfeeding. Sorry.
My only craving was watermelon, and that just makes you pee away the water weight. The doctors were flipping out, but I just couldn't eat much more than before I was pregnant. My stomach felt full all the time. It was full of baby. He came out at 7.11, 23″ long.
I didn't have one of those cute little bellies, though. Mine was kind of all around the sides and into my back. If it makes you feel better, I had to be put on bed rest and had a terrible delivery, and my kid screamed for four months straight.
I gained 50 lbs with my first son and 30 with my second.
I know that sounds like it's within a normal range, but my kids are ADOPTED. When you have a 13 month gestation period, things can get ugly. I've got stretch marks and long saggy boobs to prove it.
And no, I didn't nurse them.
I just realized that I should count myself lucky that my cootch didn't split wide open and require a sympathy episiotomy after the ordeal.
70+ and breastfeeding for 18 months didn't take of any weight.
ANYWAY, want to come down to Springfield on Sept 13th for a tourism day bought and paid for by the state? I gots connections, babe.
I am sick my ENTIRE pregnancies. I am sure if I wasn't, I would gain more wait – Look at me..hello, have we met? Even not gaining more than 30 lbs for each pregnancy, I still have all that weight and more to lose. I hate those skinny bitches. Every one of them. I have a cousin that leaves the hospital in her size 3 jeans. I hate her.
You enjoy every last chocolate morsel – eat even more for me. And when you are done, the Sausage is here safe and sound and we are both one of those skinny bitches, we are meeting in Vegas, baby!
With the first little crackbaby, I was pg EVERYWHERE. My hair was pregnant. My toenails. I gained 40 pounds in a very head-to-toe way. I was generally shocked and appalled because no one had ever told me that being pregnant would suck large quantities of ass, all while blowing those quantities right back at you. Or that kicking babies can HURT you!! Crazy little girl!! BUT… I was also riding around with my husband in his Freightliner for six months, sitting on my ample booty the whole time. Eating out all the time.
I, too, believed the "breastfeeding will help you lose the weight" lie. But Caitlin was not terribly interested in my boobs, as insignificant as they were, and whenever she latched on, it was a lot like someone was ramming a large knitting needle right through my nipple and out my back. So we both suffered with motivational issues regarding nursing. We gave up completely when she was six months old. She just said NO that day.
By the time she was 9 months old, I was very pleased with my body. Despite the stretchmarks – which were fairly mild – covering my ass and thighs, by tummy was untouched and looked quite adorable. Apparently, my husband agreed, because I got pregnant about a week later. Seemed like the thing to do at the time, you know?
But one of the other things I didn't put the effort into figuring out was that the reason my tummy held up so well was because of the rockstar, rockHARD abs I'd had pre-baby. My booty and thighs were always ample, but my tummy could've kicked your ass!! So that explains the lack of stretchmarks AND the sense that I was pg everywhere.. my tummy held it all in so it ooozed from all pores, I suppose. Getting pg again as a mother of a 9 month old did not give me time (nor had I had the inclination) to rebuild that belly. Which brings us to Jack…
…the first six weeks went quite well, then the hyper-emesis struck. I lost weight. Eating McDonald's cheeseburgers, Taco Bell Stuft Steak Burritos, and ramen noodles. They were the only things I could keep down for any amount of time. I felt horribly guilty about eating such crap, so I added vegetables to my ramen noodles, and spewed them all over that toilet. I could keep down some Ovaltine as well. Close as I could get to a damn prenatal anything. Then at 18ish wks, someone flipped a switch, and I could eat anything again. Yay! But I was skin and bones… still weighed plenty, but looked incredibly silly. Bony with this bizarre lump on my belly that was hanging down between my knees because my abs were trashed. I was due in July, and people were asking me "Any day now?" in early April. I looked like Jack had "dropped" from March on… I don't know how my back survived it!! It was like a broomstick swallowed a basketball, so not even a little bit sexy, just to clarify. My hubby would back me up on that! Still managed to gain an even 40 lbs though, between 18-40 wks! Jack was a championship milk monster, but I didn't lose anything fast. I agree that breastfeeding keeps a few pounds around. I lost a lot more weight when he weaned at 18 months. But the loss of the bf'ing hormones sent me into a tailspin emotionally and the depression brought me to the decision that DAMNIT, I was going to eat whatever the hell I wanted and my ass could just take it! BWaha! Boy did it ever. I gained a good 25 pounds over the next year, and got as big as I'd ever been. I'm just NOW, in the past month, (4 years later) down to my pre-Jack weight. And I'm still wanting and hoping for another round.
I think the skinny pg girls are either (bless your pointed little bellies) hyperthyroid OR informed about that whole "rebuild your belly between babies" thing. Or just way genetically blessed. I have two friends who both have six kids… one still looks like she looked when we met in high school. The other still looks like she did when we met 4 years ago – pregnant.
I'd like to add that while I never took drugs during delivery (I don't mean to brag, it's just that getting babies out of me is damn near the only thing I do BRILLIANTLY in this life!!) I for DAMN SURE do not fart flowers. All in attendance of my deliveries can assure you of this. 😀
Shhhh, dont tell any body *whispering* 72lbs with E. I did go back to a six though. Sadly Infertility has put just about as much on as a pregnancy and I have heard breast feeding is not an option. Oh well, I think I will have a butterfinger for breakfast.
Oh you are not alone Ms Fatty McBoob you! I averaged $75 lbs for #1-3. 50 lbs for #4. #5 was not too bad for me at 40 lbs and then ya la….#6 I hit the jackbpot and only gained 35 lbs….but that was because I had a tummy tuck after #4 and did not want to ruin it. So I had no choice but eat very very lightly or end up with a belly sag after we spent $6K on my nice new flat tummy.
Did I ever tell yu the best remedy for morning sickness for me was chips and dip! Yeah talk about ass, face, boob, leg and arm padding!
Don't beat yourself up…all the books saying 27 lbs is the normal are lying…LYING I am sure of it!
Enjoy your food. Nothing is better than food and sex during pregnancy. You know men have it good all the time right? Yeah food and sex are really good on the testosterone. It's like when your pregnant excpet no weight gain lol!
I'm 5'0″, so pretty much after 8 weeks I looked like I was ready to pop. I gained a whopping 80 pounds with Cheeks, and literally pissed 50 of it away within 24 hours after taking a diuretic because my body just wouldn't let the water go (thank you pre-eclampsia). The other 30 stayed on and then I added another 20 with Cenzo. The 20 have gone, but those frickin' 30 are still there. Heck, if I can get back into a size 8 before the kids graduate high school, I'll be happy.
So, eat and enjoy, my friend. It's all relative – if you're feeling healthy, not puking your brains out, and are happy, then relax. As for the skinny little pregos – it's the crack that keeps them skinny. 🙂
I gained about 40 lbs. I ate a bagel every morning around 4am, then breakfast at about 8 am, then lunch, then a milkshake or something on the way home from work, then dinner, then a snack at night. I'm surprised I didn't gain 100 lbs.
I also did not lose much weight breastfeeding, but as soon as I started to wean him (i.e. no more pumping) the weight started to fall off…possibly because I wasn't eating everything in sight (breastfeeding made me 3 times as hungry as I was when pregnant.)
I gained so much weight with my daughter. I was still 60 lbs over my pre pregnancy weight when I left the hospital. It was so depressing. I went back to school to finish my degree when she was 6 months old and decided to take a fitness class. I figured since it was being graded I would try harder. I lost all the weight plus more. I was in a size 2!
When I got pregnant with my second (one week after buying those size 2 jeans. I was pissed!) I didn't gain much weight. I lived on chocolate milk and zone bars. They were the only things that didn't make me sick. One week after giving birth I was in a size 4. But don't hate me too much, I am a good 25 lbs heavier now than I was when he was born. Maybe I'll take that fitness class again.
I can talk about weight gain, but sadly I have no bundle of joy to blame for it. I am just a fat-ass on my own.
Wow–this so strikes home! Gained 40ish with my first–breastfed him for 18 months and still couldn't lose the weight. Did WW and got down to my goal (still 20 pounds over my marriage weight), and promptly got pregnant. Only gained 24 pounds with that one (and the baby weighed almost 10!). Again, nursed for 22 months and GAINED weight. Um, yeah, what???? Then with my last one, still not anywhere near my goal weight when I got preggers, gained about 30 pounds and I swear, two years later, I still cannot lose the weight! (even after nursing that one for 16 months!)
I had to eat chocolate every day while I was pregnant. Every day, otherwise I would cry. And cry, and cry. So, here's to passing the chocolate and the ketchup!
With both of my J's, I gained about 50 lbs. I didn't lose it right away, but by about a year, I was back to normal weight with the first one. I think after the second one, I lost the weight faster and even ended up lighter than before I was pregnant. Not sure, since I never kept a scale in the house.
I was living the good life in a size 6. Alas, when Little J was about 5 years old, I had to take round after round of steroids for about 6 months and gained 30 lbs. Now I was a size 12/14! I kept that weight for a year or two, and then the divorce diet made me slim again. I'm now a size 10. The steroids completely changed the way my face and body looked, though. I know have back fat and a squishy belly and a permanent double chin. Wah. I've gained back about 10 lbs. or so since everything calmed down (relatively) with the divorce, but according to Honeywine, that's a good thing.
I'm 16 weeks pregnant and my sister said I don't look pregnant…I just look fat…
It's not so much the weight gain that killed me the 2nd time around (23lbs with first/ 40lbs with second). It's the weird jelly roll I now have between my pubic bone and belly button that concerns me. I'm afraid sit-ups will make it even more prominant. Gotta love the granny panties that offer some control.


text:
Steel is a historical fantasy about a girl who is thrown into the past and desperately wants to return to what she had not realized she had. It is an action-filled coming of age story set in beautiful Bahamas on the Diana, captained by Marjorie Cooper. It is a story about choices, and how those choices end up defining us. What Steel is NOT is a swashbuckling romance.
A large wave surged under them then, sending the boat rocking steeply. Jill, the world-class athlete who'd never yet lost her balance in a fencing bout, fell. Stumbling back, she hit the side of the boat and went over. Grabbing uselessly for the edge, she rolled into the ocean. ….
Waves pitched her, her sunglasses were torn away, the water was cold, shocking after the tropical air. She couldn't catch her breath – swallowed water instead. Flailing, she searched for up, groped for the surface – couldn't find it. Her lungs were tightening. It had been sunny a moment ago – where was the sun?
Someone grabbed her. Hands twisted into her clothing and pulled her into the air. She clutched at her rescuers, gasped for air, heaving deep breaths that tasted of brine, slimy and salty. But she was out of the water. She was safe. She wasn't going to die.
Many people talk about pirates as if they lived a romantic kind of life. I suppose many historical eras have people longing for them. But there was little romance going on in days that were usually all about survival. Marjorie Cooper is the Captain of the pirate ship Jill ends up on. Cooper and the rest of the crew quickly realize that Jill is completely at a loss about everything that has to do with a pirate's life. Suspicions about her being a spy for Edmund Blane (another pirate) are soon squashed by her ineptitude. Even fencing, a sport Jill thought she excelled at, was of a whole different caliber in the Bahamas in the late 1800's.
Jill could only shake her head – no, she'd never fought for blood. Not real blood. Only ranks, medals, and maybe a college scholarship. She bowed her head, embarrassed, when tears fell. She wiped them away quickly. Her still-wet hair stuck to her cheeks. Salt water crusted her clothing. However much she wanted to sit down, pass out – or drop the rapier, which she wouldn't have been able to raise again if Henry came at her in another attack – she remained standing before the captain, as straight as she could, which wasn't very at moment.
"What's your name, lass?"
"Jill. Jill Archer," she said, her voice scratching. She only just noticed that she was thirsty.
"And, Jill, how do you come to be adrift in the wide sea so far from home?"
The tears almost broke then, and she took a moment to answer. "I don't know."
Slowly, Jill learns what it means to be a pirate and also what it means to be an adult. Basically, that meant work. The kind that left her little time and energy to plan, to regret or to think about her family. Wood had to be kept free of mold, sails had to be mended, ropes had to be spliced, the ship had to be emptied and barnacles removed and repeat. Slaves were rescued, battles fought, magic rapier tips followed and lives were put on the line. All the time the Diana kept on chasing Blane and Jill became more and more part of most of the crew. But not all of it, the Diana's prisoner included.
On board, the pirates have a Doctor Emory. When Diana was landed to clean off barnacles, he tried to signal his friends in the hopes that they would see and come rescue him and kill the pirates. Having signed their articles, Jill does not feel the same.
Often, Jill finds herself thinking that she should tell her siblings Tom and Mandy about her experiences. She wonders if her family misses her. She regrets her moping, when, really, there was nothing to mope about. Slowly she goes from being an unaware, privileged, white, middle-class girl to learning some of life's more difficult lessons. One is that very little in life can be taken for granted. A difficult lesson to learn is that when you feel helpless it is easier to follow orders you do not understand rather than to disobey. What happens when a point that seems like one of no return appears? What then? Jill learns what obsession looks like and how it brings danger to others. She learns about the dire consequences some choices have and how some of those consequences reach far into the future to bring a 16-year old girl into the past to right them.
Definitely recommended.


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DO you have any special memories of the caves at the West Hill.
Smugglers Adventure visitors attraction is celebrating its 25th anniversary this year and wants to hear from those with special stories over the years.
The business is planning to put together a special exhibition charting its history and it wants local people to get in touch to add their own stories.
Staff are hoping the appeal will encourage people to contact them with photographs and other memorabilia which trace the attraction's recent past.
Smugglers manager Trevor White said: "For centuries these mysterious caves have had a fascinating part to play in the history of the area, playing host to everything from soldiers to smugglers.
"They have served as a home, a hospital, an air-raid shelter and a ballroom and been visited by an extraordinary cast of characters ranging from common criminals to royalty.
"We're hoping to add our own chapter to their extraordinary history and we need the public's help to make it happen."
The acres of caverns that conceal the thrilling history of smugglers, bootleggers and warring bloodthirsty gangs were turned into a visitor attraction in 1989.
If you have an interesting story about the caves email firstname.lastname@example.com. For more information about Smugglers visit www.smugglersadventure.co.uk


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Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Sox Cut Loose Andrew Bailey And Ryan Kalish
Ryan Kalish With A Young Fan (FN Photo)
As expected,
the Red Sox non-tendered reliever
Andrew Bailey
—meaning, as of today, he is a free agent who can sign with any team. Boston also non-tendered outfielder
Ryan Kalish
—who has suffered myriad injuries over the last three years. Kalish was once thought to be the 'heir apparent' in right field, but was hit with bad luck at almost every turn in his multiple rehabilitation stints. We wish them both well in 2014. Bailey would have likely made upwards of $4 million via arbitration, and the team just couldn't risk another lost year from the guy they swapped
Josh Reddick
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