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Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Comic 591: Cornucopia of Hatred
For one thing, there was the actual seriously funny idea of what would happen if Twilight people attempted to penetrate the dense jungles of 4chan. Of course, the hilarious things that would happen are exactly the opposite of what Randy draws, and that just makes it funnier. Rather than take over and ruin the fun of the usual /b/tards, they would be utterly shocked and horrified within seconds and run screaming to their parents and cry for a while, and what isn't funny about Twilight people doing that? Nothing. Nothing is unfunny about that. So the double level of humor is that Randall got it totally wrong as well.
Then there is the crazy idea that Ms. Meyer a) monitors twilight fan pages, b) takes offense at anything bad that happens on any one of them, c) can trace the website where such bad things were planned, d) cares enough that she will mix her characters in with the 4chan people, and e) doesn't care enough to know that 4chan people would love nothing more than such publicity. GOOD JOB MAKING REALISTIC CHARACTERS, RANDY! this is why people want to punch you in the face.
Next in our cavalcade of joyous things is the fact that that isn't what 4chan even looks like, fucker! You have it set up like some type of message board where everyone has an avatar or something, and all the posts are super short and are all aligned together. Whereas in fact it is way messier than that.
Also, dude, and this is serious: enough with the 4chan. We get it, you like the site, awesome, spiffy, that takes real skill, etc, it makes you cool, etc, none of us are capable of such things. Also it is always hilarious so that is nice. Stop it though. We get it, we swear we won't forget, can you stop now? Awesome.
Hell, we didn't even get to see their trolling! That might have been fun but we just skip from "let's do this in the future" to "it has been done, please stop it" without seeing the actual event itself! lame.
But I'm not done! Let's talk about art. As a crappy artist, I try not to mention this too much, but come on: I've mentioned before that faces can be a good thing and today's comic is further proof of that. Why can't 4chan man have a face? Why leave out his eyes and nose and mouth and ears but include the zits? Why include zits where his eyes should be? This is like when you drew creepy wrinkly morgan freeman or horrible snake monster attacking that girl's head. I understand that lazy drawing is kind of your thing but seriously, do you not see the problems it can create?
OK OK OK I swear I'm almost done! I will get this blog post up before midnight!
Lastly, general unprofessionalism. Take a look at the comic you put on your site, Randy. Look at line two of panel one ["I'm in..."]. Look at how you made a mistake somewhere, and instead of starting again (it was still at the beginning!) or using, I don't know, the fucking eraser tool on photoshop, you just were like, "WHATEVER, DUDE, AHM MAKING MAH OWN DAMN COMIC" and just crossed it out. WHAT? you can't just do that! Ok maybe sometimes you can but come on! We're supposed to be reading text on a computer screen! I understand the strikethrough concept but that's not what you have there! You have scribbles! what the fuck??
And you spelled "Stephenie Meyer" wrong! Granted, I misspelled "Twilight" when I looked it up on wikipedia just now but I'm just some nobody on the internet. You are a professional comic! This is what you do. Can you really not be bothered with these things? Was there really not enough time between last Friday and last Monday to start this comic again, without mistakes? Is this really how you present yourself? I know this is coming from a guy who left out the end of a sentence in his last post but again: I am not a professional!
Now granted he did fix it -after like 2 days- with the usual "no acknowledgement anywhere that i fucked up, giant d-bag that I am" but as you can see, I have reconstructed the original, crappy version of the comic above. Sorry it's not bigger but hey, fuck you. It's big enough.
So with a thousand different reasons to LOVE today's comic, I know - i just know - I will be disappointed by tomorrows.
What did you love most about this one?
update: oh my god. i know i predicted that 592 would disappoint me but oh. my. GOD.
107 comments:
The new 'E' in Stephenie looks suspiciously identical to the last 'E' in Stephenie. Just saying.ReplyDelete
Keep on doin' what you do, Carl.
- AnonymousJune 2, 2009 at 9:05 PM
As much as this one is "bad", today's sets the bar at a new high for suckitude. In fact, this one might be considered "humorous", or even "funny" by sheer comparison.ReplyDelete
Could this be Randall's plan? To make XKCD funny when compared to XKCD?
- AnonymousJune 2, 2009 at 9:11 PM
The 4chan kid doesn't have a face because he's Anonymous. That's just about the only thing Randall got right in this comic.ReplyDelete
Today's comic is about Randall himself, which makes it just super fucking creepy.
Maybe Randall is secretly Amish, and that's why he doesn't draw faces.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 2, 2009 at 10:04 PM
He's _really like that_. He walked up and introduced himself to me and asked what I did, but when I said "Technical writer" he was like "Oh, I thought you were a graphic designer or something." Then later he said "Hey, I want to go home and play smash brothers, but yesterday there was this girl and she has my sketchbook." I said "Um."ReplyDelete
He said "Yeah, I showed her my sketchbook and then we left and went off into a fountain and played in the water and I'd really like to see her again because she's beautiful but I also want to play video games, could you send me a message on IRC if she shows up?"
And I was like "sure" and in my head I said "Oh my God, he's actually like that."
Apparently he got swept up into the MIT-poly community because all the undergrad girls think he's hot and he has like three girlfriends now and there is drama? I stopped paying attention.
I liked this one personally, it actually had a unique idea AFAIK, and a good one.ReplyDelete
They are the same E. You can see them blown up here: http://img79.imageshack.us/img79/72/71732244.jpgReplyDelete
Though how you noticed that is beyond me.
I mean, if Randall weren't a big awkward nerd, wouldn't he just be pandering?ReplyDelete
I think Randall's trying to butter up Meyer by portraying her as a stick figure: http://www4.pictures.gi.zimbo.com/Breaking+Dawn+Concert+Series+Stephenie+Meyer+Z_Ut_MQzivvl.jpgReplyDelete
Not saying she's morbidly obese or anything, but perhaps Randall could've used thicker lines to draw her?
*this ends the objectifying patriarchy portion of the comments*
Also, nobody on 4chan would show such self-awareness except in one of Randall's fantasies.
i actually kinda smiled at this comic.ReplyDelete
today's, however, is extraordinarily horrendous.
sorry, use that
Anon: you are an MIT person? Would you like to (a) help gather intelligence on Randy (b) go to a party? email meReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 2, 2009 at 11:00 PM
What's wrong with 592? It has a awkward and artificial sexual dialogue, geeky relationships, people out of their field's depth, and a big old chart! What's not to like?ReplyDelete
Also, please stop using the word drama for that. Drama refers specifically to the performance of a certain type of fiction. Histrionics sounds better and has pathological undertones, which is sort of appropriate.
- AnonymousJune 2, 2009 at 11:01 PM
Hey, new one just popped. It makes this one look half decent.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 2, 2009 at 11:13 PM
The new one ("Drama") comes across like Randall trying really, really hard to be Ryan North.ReplyDelete
592 is one of the most frustrating comics i have ever seen.ReplyDelete
Carl would you really "much that person in the face"? I really don't know what that would entail PROOFREAD YOUR GODDAMN POSTS CARL OR I SWEAR I AM LEAVINGReplyDelete
omfg thomas i feel like i should be insulted but i'm totally not actually i can't stop laughing
captcha: anorn. Anornymous!
"GOOD JOB MAKING REALISTIC CHARACTERS, RANDY!"ReplyDelete
COMON'! This is sooooo lame...
I don't think you are funny, most of time boring, so I don't answer...
but this punch line is so bad. Really? You REALLY want comic drawers to make realistic characters? COME OOOOON!
(I'm Batman)
are you a joke?ReplyDelete
Oh, thank goodness. If you weren't Batman, I might have been inclined to object. Carry on, Mr. Wayne.ReplyDelete
WAY TO BLOW BATMAN'S COVER AS BRUCE WAYNE, PATReplyDelete
you are now public enemy #1
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 12:58 AM
It sounds like Randall had a "Hey, I handed you a contract before we did it. It says under section III, paragraph B that if we fuck without a condom, you keep the baby and I'm not held liable for STDs, superseding any possible oral contracts at any future point in time" moment in a relationship and he's frustratedly blogging it out in comic form. He puts words in the woman's mouth so that the other two aren't going "let's change sex so I can get into ladies' pants easier". It's really creepy.ReplyDelete
Well, I think you got it all wrong, this time. If enough Twilighters will go to 4chan, exactly the things he drew would happen.ReplyDelete
And about the "crazy idea about S. Meyer monitoring fan sites and stuff": Comics don't have to be realistic. They are often funny because they twist reality or show us what can happen (but won't).
Seems to me as if you have kind of a idée fixe to find everything he draws bad...
I don't know. I think the Twilight fantards would puzzle even /b/ for a while. Then they'd get mocked off the boards and linked endlessly to goatse and shock sites. It's certainly not the full depiction, though.ReplyDelete
- Cuddlefish PrimeJune 3, 2009 at 1:39 AM
I couldn't even pretend to like anything about 592 if I tried, and I'm definitely on the more lenient side of the spectrum of xkcdsucks regulars.ReplyDelete
I looked at 591's thread on their forum, and someone pointed out that the pimplespots are in what is known as an "EURion constellation", which is used on banknotes to detect them in images.ReplyDelete
It adds nothing to the comic of any value. I really don't know why he'd reference such an obscure bit of technology - he's certainly never done anyth...
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 2:44 AM
I always assumed that Randall was a massive fan of 4chan (due to his incessant use of their memes) but after this comic I have to assume he has never been to 4chan and instead is exposed to the themes from a third party source before regurgitating them, which is so unbelievably sad and pathetic I don't even want to contemplate it.ReplyDelete
I still don't understand why you feel you have to police the internet, because that is what you have been doing for a while now. You feel that because you have a different opinion than most people you have to force them to see it your way. Also, Why would an author not look at their own fan pages? Yes they would take offense to things 4chan posted on their site, as that would expose the youngest of their readers to all of the things that make the *chans wonderful. The reason the 4chan images looked small was most likely because if he set the board up like it looks like, you be able to see 2 messages, at most.ReplyDelete
I think that you just enjoy nitpicking Randall's comic because of one of three reasons.
1- You attempted at a webcomic/blog/something similar, and failed.
2- You do not get a lot of attention in your normal life.
3- You feel that if anyone thinks something or someone thinks something different than you do, you think they are wrong, as you obviously are infallible.
Oh, and yes I expect this post to be deleted
It won't be. You just look like a moron.ReplyDelete
Now loads of people are going to go "aha, you have used criticisms that people have used before. YOU LOSE ALEX" and then they're not going to tell you why you lose. Nobody here gets any attention in their normal life, that's why they're on the internet. Ebert doesn't make films, apparently, and 3... everyone thinks that, apart from me (I know it).
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 5:08 AM
"I still don't understand why you feel you have to police the internet, because that is what you have been doing for a while now."ReplyDelete
Criticising != Policing
XKCD != The internet
"Why would an author not look at their own fan pages?"
Because they're busy doing other things, like writing and wallowing in their money.
"The reason the 4chan images looked small was most likely because if he set the board up like it looks like, you be able to see 2 messages, at most."
No, he just drew it completely wrong. He made it look like twitter or something.
I'm actually wondering if Stephenie Meyer monitoring fan sites is really an unrealistic scenario. Wasn't it Anne Rice who RESPONDED to negative criticism in Amazon reviews (and in a particularly whiny and pathetic way)? People in the forum also pointed out that Meyer reads (and possibly even writes) Twilight fanfiction. And even if that's not the case, I don't see the point in complaining about lack of realism -- OR to the lack of faces. Come on, XKCD characters DON'T HAVE faces. Deal with it (the pimples following the banknote pattern seems really like masturbatory display of knowledge to get all the fans raving and drooling without reason. Erk).ReplyDelete
Now, I still hated this comic. Twilight fans taking over 4chan would neither be funny nor good. If 4chan is the pinnacle of stupidity in the Internet, Twilight is the pinnacle of stupidity in Literature -- and replacing an evil with another evil is just bad. Come on, should we really root for Stephenie Meyer? Look, Meyer should be just banished from writing. I've got friends who write out of true pleasure and love for language, but they have no chance to get a publishing deal -- not because oh the world is cruel either way, but because hacks like Meyer turned the business into a neverending cycle. Twilight FEEDS teenage egocentrism and prepotence, and then CASHES IN on it, cyclically. That is NOT the kind of role model I'd like to see taking over 4chan, Randall, sorry. Your wish-fulfilment fanfiction comic this time was just atrocious -- maybe you should take this stuff into fanfiction.net, or something: THAT is where the "turning my personal fantasy into my personal reality" domain thrives.
So I guess I'm in the minority who thinks today's comic was actually much, much better.
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 5:23 AM
Here's the deal Carl/Rob/WhomeverReadsThis:ReplyDelete
I've been agreeing more and more with you recently. 590? Trash. 589 I thought was okay, but agreed with many of your criticisms of it, and that's been the general trend of my thoughts on the majority of your posts. However it seems to me now that, while yes, the comics have been far suckier as of late, you've been far less willing to say "Hey, this one's not too bad," or "This one is good for these reasons despite any problems caused by problems (a), (b), and (c)."
You cannot simultaneously complain that the comics are too realistic (like a Randy blog) and too unrealistic (like they should be in many ways) (or like the results in this one) at the same time. Pick one, preferably the one complaining that it is too realistic, cause that's just boring as fuck.
And last, but not least, I'd like to agree that what the hell is up with him not erasing anything? Show some professionalism, seriously.
~ Remus
P.S. 592 is like eating a live electric eels. It's a shock and different, but still tastes horrible.
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 5:24 AM
Eel. Singular. Damn.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 6:02 AM
@ remusReplyDelete
I take issue with your realism comparison. They're not really incompatible qualities. I see your point though, something doesn't have to be realistic to be funny- the audience just has to buy it. And I, like Carl I guess, didn't buy it (maybe because it wasn't funny?)
Unrelated note, when I read today's comic I actually thought for a second he was parodying himself. Then when that passed, I thought he took a dump in my brain. I think the second one is more likely
By the way, people have noted that the word that was scribbled out was "LOL". I wonder why, really: the xkcd forums have a (pretty stupid) "taboo" with the word "LOL", replacing it with an idiotic phrase, but that doesn't mean that "LOL" isn't used all over the Internet and should be forbidden from appearing in an xkcd depiction of the Internet. I didn't get it, really -- one could guess that the scribbling-over was a sort of in joke, but if he corrected it, then that's not the case.ReplyDelete
I'm starting to agree that Randall really, really, really needs beta reading.
The new one ("Drama") comes across like Randall trying really, really hard to be Ryan North.ReplyDelete
Jesus Christ, yes. This is really pretty accurate.
Anyway, uh, re: the whole realism debate: YES there can be some humor in taking normal things and twisting them. NO, Randall isn't doing this, he's constructing new scenarios out of almost entirely whole cloth. There is no connection between 591 and reality other than "4chan hates Twilight."
Besides, there are times in humor and writing in general when realism is important, and times when it isn't. Generally, it's safe to take some leeway in the setting, but your characters and people had damn well better act like real people.
Of course, with topical humor, there's less leeway you can take with the setting as well, since that's what informs the entire joke. Sure, you could argue that exaggeration makes topical humor funnier, but is he actually exaggerating anything here? Not only are none of these persons extreme, they're not actually based on how they seem to actually behave. It's not an exaggeration, just a sad warping.
I think a useful example might be 473, in which Randall was so far removed from reality (people still care about Pluto?) that it just falls flat. Although that is a legitimate exaggeration of how people felt, except for the fact that it was only legitimate two years ago and now it's just a callback to ancient humor. It's like if today I went and wrote a comic about 400 or some nonsense.
TO SUM UP: Realism may not be the end-all-be-all of humor, but there is a healthy amount of reality awareness necessary to inform a strip.
Realistic != believable
If a character behaves in a way different from the way the reader believes that character would behave (usually based on their knowledge of the character, people like the character, and their personal expereinces with other characters/people), then the author has failed to create a believable character. It doesn't matter if that character exists in an entirely realistic universe or in a magical land of dinosaur unicorns (dinocorns?) controlled by shamanistic, one-eyed cavemen who fight against an evil overlord whose actually a sentient waffle iron from the year 3012 - they will still be a poorly-written, unbelievable, shitty character.
592 is kind of funny, in that it's amusing to think that Randall actually thinks this is good/funny.ReplyDelete
I'm lost to describe why it's bad really, though (chart aside). The whole thing makes sense and everything, but it's just so lame and unfunny. Like a newspaper comic.
xkcd is becoming the Garfield of the Internet.
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 8:11 AM
I doubt anyone will ever be able to usurp that title from Sinfest.ReplyDelete
xkcd is more like the newspaper version of Spider-Man of the Internet.
This comic is just the old routine about parents ruining things their kids like, by taking an interest in those things themselves.ReplyDelete
Granted, it is a large enough twist on that trope to not be inherently horrible. But Randall, naturally, fails to build anything new onto it. It is -just- a change of scenario, and that makes it suck.
In addition, the implication that Meyer and her fans don't deserve the criticism they get, well... that's just silly. She and Twilight are everything that's wrong with America.
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 9:24 AM
/b/ is dying exactly because people like angsty Twilight fans post their stupid threads.ReplyDelete
I do not agree with you on this regard. /b/-tards hate that and this is a realistic scenario. No one is shocked by /b/'s images anymore. Forget about it.
You should read about The Cancer that is killing /b/ on encyclopedia dramatica. I haven't checked it out but it's probably full of useful information regarding the death of /b/.
- EndlessJune 3, 2009 at 10:19 AM
This was actually my favorite xkcd is a while and I have some real problems with your criticisms.ReplyDelete
You need realism and realistic characters to create drama, not humor. In fact, archetypes can be MORE conducive to a humorous strip because they're more easily relatable.
That you take issue with the concept of Meyer monitoring flame comments reveals why xkcd could never satisfy you even if it made the funniest joke it the world. The suspension of disbelief it takes to ignore the improbability of Meyer's response is minor. The fact that you are unwilling to commit yourself to that minor suspension tells me that you're reading the comic with the intent to deconstruct it.
No joke is ever funny after it's been analyzed. You have to read it to enjoy it before you read it to take it apart, otherwise you'll miss whatever humor is there to be found.
It's like E.B. White said "Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it." Deconstruction kills the joke and since you're doing it while reading you'll always kill whatever joke exists.
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 10:25 AM
And yet, good humor tends to not need to be explained or deconstructed to begin with, because it is inherently funny. xkcd is not.ReplyDelete
- Anon EmusJune 3, 2009 at 10:35 AM
John: No, that would be PvP.ReplyDelete
"She and Twilight are everything that's wrong... IN AMERICA!"ReplyDelete
Just thought I should do that.
"The fact that you are unwilling to commit yourself to that minor suspension tells me that you're reading the comic with the intent to deconstruct it."
Well, actually, I think xkcd strips are generally excellent because they stand up well against criticism and analysis. I don't remember having to suspend my disbelief too much for xkcd -- they pretty much resonated right away. This is getting rare, though.
Yes, that's a minor suspension of disbelief. Believing that a successful author would right 4chan into a book to get revenge, however, is not. That's a pretty major usspension of disbelief. Not to mention that since Meyer is a real person and not a random character, and nothing she's ever done suggests that she cares or even knows of 4chan's existence, further adding to the lack of believablility. Poorly-written dialog also makes her seem less like a real person. Oh, and the fact that we also have to suspend our disbelief that Twilight fans would not be ignored on /b/. And the fact that Anonymous would not totally harass the hell out of anyone trying to counter-troll, if they didn't just ignore them all together.
You see the problem here? If Meyer monitoring comments was the only concession the reader needed to make to find the comic funny, it might have worked. However, it is compounded with more terrible choices that only compound the unbelievability of the strip. Lacking realism is not the problem - lacking verisimilitude is.
On a different note, few people being interested in something doesn't mean it's not a worthwhile endeavor. Few people were interested in the Internet in it's early days (I'm talking CERN, here), and now it's made instantly sharing information (and idiocy) with people on the other side of the world possible for millions.
I like the frog analogy, though. Like the frog, xkcd is lifeless before we begin dissecting it.
Gah! "Write", not "right"!ReplyDelete
I pray to the language gods for mercy.
- Language GodJune 3, 2009 at 12:20 PM
You are denied mercy, my son.ReplyDelete
@poore: I'm not sure why it seems so outrageous that She'd read comments at some point. Most authors like feedback, after all. After you reach a certain threshold, you shouldn't pay attention to every little critique, but it's always tempting to know what people are thinking, or interact with fans, or whatever. But then, IANAFA (I am not a famous author).ReplyDelete
Now, writing 4chan into the book is completely unrealistic, but it's the heart of the joke. If it helps, you can think of it as an attack on Meyer's literary integrity.
I'll also concede I don't know 4chan, but most Internet communities are fragile in the face of incoming waves of stupidity. From what I hear, though, 4chan would be better at it than most, thanks to its own indigenous brands of stupid. But either way, stupid loses, at least.
Pat: WHAT literary integrity?ReplyDelete
Yeah, like that.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 1:46 PM
Just discovered this site for the first time and all I can say is...Wow. And I thought I was a jaded misanthrope. You sir need a new sense of humor, I think yours is broken.ReplyDelete
[i]WAY TO BLOW BATMAN'S COVER AS BRUCE WAYNE, PATReplyDelete
you are now public enemy #1[/i]
That could have been any Mr. Wayne, Amanda. If he didn't blow it, you just did. GOOD JOB.
In unrelated news, HOLY SHIT BATMAN IS BRUCE WAYNE?!?!?!?!?!?!? NO WAI.
Goddammit okay fine Pat you are public enemy #2 I guess.ReplyDelete
APUWDYWIIYHTWWTMIPITTRTPOWIITFP (Also Pat uhhh why did you write "IANAFA" if you had to write what that meant in parentheses, I think that ruins the point of writing IANAFA in the first place.)
I am realizing I have too much time on my hands now that summer has started.
captcha: coconu. to go with the live eels that randy feeds you
Also, 592 is attempting to get a cheap laugh, which even that it is failing at. I hope, for my faith in humanity, that Randall is cooking up something that will make me laugh until I literally choke from not being able to inhale from the hilarity of said joke. Sadly, I do not believe that this will be the case.ReplyDelete
OMGSSFYDISHTWATGWTMMSAWSPSDTBSTACAOHSDYKHFHTSAIH (OMG summer started for you??? DAMMIT. I still have to wait another two goddamn weeks. This makes me sad. Also, we should probably stop doing this before someone throws a coconut at our heads. Seriously, do you know how fucking hard those shells are? It HURTS)
592 has a couple pros for me: It's a desperate attempt to be Dinosaur Comics, which is a noble endeavor for any webcomics artist; and the graph actually furthers the exposition and is not completely irrelevant and is a nice alternative to just saying "immediately after this shit went down, EVERYTHING WENT CRAZY."ReplyDelete
However, note how MUCH drama was caused by one dude's attempt to come up with a few rules for sex. Apparently, like, ten times as much as existed before. That's a lot of drama, Randall. I highly doubt that your little new rules for sex are going to suddenly become the most-discussed event on the planet by an order of magnitude. Seriously: Retarded. Unless you meant the drama experienced by the character?
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 2:46 PM
It's not realistic, but xkcd isn't supposed to be realistic: the situations are very rarely plausible. That's okay in comics. I actually considered this the first decently funny one in a very long time.ReplyDelete
I'm trying to parse what 592 is trying to say.ReplyDelete
"Sex has complicated rules which lead to drama." All right, fair enough--this sounds like Randy saying "I just want to have a lot of sex with people without it meaning anything."
But after this point he loses me. Is he then saying that "but those rules are necessary to social dynamics, and actually help reduce drama?" Or that "the rules suck but it is BETTER THAN THE ALTERNATIVE?" Or is he being aware of the fact that, like with any social construct, it relies on most people accepting it, and that if you remove the rules that people are relying upon, you are more likely to create drama, because the rule is being distributed unequally?
Is he discovering that sex communes suck? WHAT IS HIS DEAL.
I think he's saying that because other people are so closed-minded and prudish, they were like "OH GOD WHAT IS THIS MADNESS SOMEONE IS SUGGESTING WE GO FOR FREE LOVE THIS IS CHAOS" and the entire world became Warhammer 40,000 in terms of death and chaos because the idea that maybe we shouldn't be so uptight about who we bone is completely new and hasn't been around and in popular opinion for at least forty years.ReplyDelete
- CuddlerJune 3, 2009 at 3:14 PM
Huh; I agree that Randall is trying to be too much like Ryan North in 592, but I actually like the comic better than most of the recent ones *because* of that - namely, that he actually did a decent job of copying Qwantz's style.ReplyDelete
That still doesn't excuse him pretty much blatantly ripping it off though.
What I got from 592 was "a simple ruleset is unable to define the complexities of human existence", as reinforced by the alt-text (the comparison to the stock market) and the last panel.ReplyDelete
Unfortunately, this cannot be twisted to imply that Randall Munroe is a paedophile, and therefore as a theory it is doomed to be ignored.
That would work except that "drama" graph panel really bugs me if that's the interpretation. If it were just an issue of "Wow, my model failed. I guess things are more complicated than I thought" it wouldn't have turned the world into a maelstrom of cancer and madness.ReplyDelete
xkcd 592 was one that was actually HORRIBLY HORRIBLY RUINED by the presence of a chart. All in all, I think this one had the potential to have actually been an enjoyable comic (which might just be because of how shitty other ones were).ReplyDelete
Perhaps it's just because I can relate to this one. I have a fair share of friends who could be generally described as "socially awkward" and as such I often hear the complaint of "X social convention is so illogical and I don't get why everyone does it". As such, the idea of changing X social convention and spinning the world into disproportional chaos is actually quite an interesting idea to base a comic off of... but only if it's done correctly.
Unfortunately, this comic does it horribly horribly wrong. Let's say, for instance, that instead of there being that stupid chart as the third panel, which has the same comedic and dramatic value of a fourth character walking into the room and saying "things are worse than you originally attempted." There was, instead, a landscape of complete carnage, people looting stores and buildings burning to the ground, the streets littered with thousands who had died needlessly in an utter and total collapse of civilization. The last panel can stay.
Is it an entirely original comic? No. Is it all that funny? Well, it would make me crack a smile if I didn't just write it. Is it a whole lot better than A STUPID FUCKING CHART? Yes.
No, I agree with your theory.
Unfortunately, a theory is not a joke, and as theories go, one that is merely a blatant statement of one of the most well-known elements of the human experience ain't all that funny.
I didn't say it was funny. I just said it couldn't be used to imply Randy had an unhealthy fixation with underage girls. Most things which are the latter aren't the former.ReplyDelete
(Incidentally, do you folks share our meaning of the word "randy" as "horny"? O travellers from an arcane land)
I use it, yeah.ReplyDelete
Good. Now I can cast aspersions along the lines of "randy is called randy for a good reason, if you know what i mean"ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 4:30 PM
I thought this comic was horrendous. The Twilight frenzy was over several months ago. This almost reminds me a lot of the South Park a little while back where Twilight fans were ruining the Goth image. Maybe it's because he picks the easiest topics possible, but I feel like I can think of an equivalent joke someone else has made for a lot of the recent xkcd comics.ReplyDelete
I also think it's funny when people come here to complain about you complaining about another thing.
- RehoboamJune 3, 2009 at 4:59 PM
I sometimes just call him Randull.ReplyDelete
"I also think it's funny when people come here to complain about you complaining about another thing."ReplyDelete
It's not funny. A complaint about a comic and a complaint about a complaint are both the same in that they lack any practical purpose. Likely that just as you take a demeaning attitude towards people who complaint about your opinions, Randall himself doesn't give a shit about you -- so we're all losers.
The Internet is sort of boring when you look at it without cynicism.
- AnonymousJune 3, 2009 at 8:05 PM
I'm not sure why Randall caring or not matters. I mean, if I liked him it might matter, but why should I care whether someone I don't respect is listening to me or not? XKCD sucks is not for Randall, it's for people who don't like XKCD to enjoy each others' jokes at its expense.ReplyDelete
Kurt IIRCYALFSIWAYASIHSIGTASSCAWGOAAMBEEWASLAMBYGSTIRNTBJA (if I remember correctly you are like fourteen so I will assume you are still in high school. I go to a semester-system college, and we get out about a month before everyone else. We also start like a month before you guys, so there is really nothing to be jealous about).ReplyDelete
okay now everything that is in all caps looks like a bizzare shortening of a phrase.
Randy Randull? Hee.
To the anon who wrote that I write this blog because I failed at my own webcomic, don't get any attention in real life, or because I know I am right and everyone else is wrong, it is most assuredly the last of those. I have never attemped my own webcomic.ReplyDelete
And really, if you think I'm going to delete your comment, you really are new here. I love comments that call me stupid - look at the tagline to this blog. I only delete comments if they are from someone pretending to be me. Or also those people that have been posting porn links recently, not sure what's up with that. (I blame Rob though - don't trust that guy).
it was me I admit itReplyDelete
Rob is a nefarious trickster.ReplyDelete
I was once called a mountebank without a trace of irony.ReplyDelete
he thought he was being insulting
who has been posting porn links, i have not seen that at allReplyDelete
(is it weird that i am curious about this)
captcha: ststpap. what is this
Well, regardless of how this argument goes, IAGIHKOAHOUAFRS (I am glad I have kicked off a trend of using acronyms for random statements)ReplyDelete
... My original "IANAFA" was based off the Slashdot standard "IANAL" (I am not a lawyer). If you aren't familiar with Slashdot, I recommend avoiding it. It's a haven of nihilists and contrarians.
See also: the Internet.ReplyDelete
- RehoboamJune 4, 2009 at 5:30 AM
"If you aren't familiar with Slashdot, I recommend avoiding it. It's a haven of nihilists and contrarians."ReplyDelete
Reasons I have been moderated to -1 (Troll) on Slashdot:
I expressed distate at EVE/Band of Brothers versus Goon Squad making the news.
I pointed out that first-person shooters on consoles are subject to low frames-per-second, making it less than ideal.
I said that certain Open Source Software is pretty crappy and that I'd rather buy propriety software with a guarantee that it works.
Amongst others.
- RehoboamJune 4, 2009 at 5:31 AM
And the funny thing is that on that first one (about EVE) I had actually been moderated to +5 for humour, originally.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 4, 2009 at 5:36 AM
Slashdot is great if you like sucking dick every day.ReplyDelete
- formatJune 4, 2009 at 12:34 PM
592 and the pep rally one (588) cemented the thought that I had that Randall is really 'that guy' that I really hated in high school. By extension xkcd has become a comic made especially for 'that guy'ReplyDelete
You probably know the 'guy' that I mean, the one who is so socially inept and can't handle normal situations so he thinks 'this social norm is awkward for me to follow so let's change it'.
588 was so far removed from reality that it really read as a sort of like it was pandering to the socially inept nerds that have become XKCD's fanbase. I really dislike those people.
- formatJune 4, 2009 at 12:35 PM
oh and 'seinfeld did it'.ReplyDelete
and way better and in a realistic way.
Not to mention that 'that guy' makes the rest of us nerds look bad. And reinforces negative nerd stereotypes. And creates a nerd clique that tries to make the undesireable aspects of the nerd stereotype 'cool'; a lot of other social groups (furries, I'm looking at you) do this, too, and it's the main reason why these people are treated with such disdain.
Pfft, no one is offended by 4chan anymore. A surge of Twilight fangirls would have the same effect that the surge of Gaians, Habbos, and LJers had.ReplyDelete
IANAS (I Am Not A Sociologist) but surely enthusing over one's own behaviour is something that all social groups do? It's the sort of inbuilt cliquishness... hell, I'll just quote some Roger Waters. Don't like it, screw you.ReplyDelete
With, without.
And who'll deny it's what the fighting's all about?
So there, orthodoxy.
it's not even the social ineptitude that makes us hate 'that guy," it's that person's... what do you call it? Where they assume they are socially inept because they are just better than everyone else? I guess that is as good a label as any... Anyway that is what makes us hate them and that is exactly what xkcd has been emulating, in comic form, for the past 100+ comics: "I am socially inept but SO AWESOME"ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 4, 2009 at 10:24 PM
Carl, I've read alot of the posts on this site, and I have a few questions. Do you hate geeks? Because I see so much disdain in your posts against "nerdy" things. Because thats the exact demographic this comic is made for. I realized that within the first 15. Some of your criticism is fair, but alot of it seems like you make it harsh for the simple ability TO make it harsh. I've read every single XKCD, and have been following it for a little over a year now, and 80% of them make me smile and laugh, 10% i go "meh" and move on with my day, and the remaining 10% i laugh so hard im crying and linking it to everyone I can. I just want to know why you are so overly critical of the comic, when it simply plays to the demographic it is written to. Sure its overrated, but so is anything popular on the internet. Does Randall Munroe make you so angry becaue people like it even when you don't find it funny? Thanks for reading this.ReplyDelete
- Summer Glau ;)
aHa. a hahahaha. Ha.ReplyDelete
Except you're doing it wrong.
Man I didn't know Summer Glau was a half-witted interweb fanboy.ReplyDelete
- John S.June 4, 2009 at 11:57 PM
We see what you did there, Anonymous 10:24 PM.ReplyDelete
Also, nerdy things aren't axiomatically funny. Mere references aren't funny. xkcd isn't funny.
wait am I supposed to answer it or does "summer glau" mean it was a joke? uhhhhh I don't know.ReplyDelete
I am very much a nerd myself, which is why I first liked xkcd. I am sorry to hear that you like it. Reading every single xkcd is not an accomplishment. When I first found xkcd I read them all in a day and then learned about alt texts and read them all again the next day.
@Amanda: Arrogance?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 5, 2009 at 12:28 AM
But the ZOMGreference logic says family guy's funny, and we know that's not true.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 5, 2009 at 8:12 AM
I put the summer glau reference in because since I know you've read them, you'd at least get the joke.ReplyDelete
@Rob: Don't call me half witted. You don't know me. Were on the internet, so thats statement is more true than ever. I do like XKCD, so when I see someone dedicate an entire website to dislike of it, I have some questions, which Carl was at least honorable to respond to.
@John S: I never said they were. But this is the first time I've ever seen a website dedicated to bringing down a comic (and making lists of the types of comic) for doing what that comic says its going to be about.
@Carl: Thank you for the response. The Summer Glau ending was just the best note I could feel to end on. I never was attempting to invoke accomplishment, simply that I wasn't coming out of no where with my statements. I don't, however, want to hear your "sorry to hear [I] like it", like I'm some lesser being for doing so.
But you clearly are a lesser being. For example, are you called Carl? Doesn't look like it. Are you too good for that? Do the names Carl Washington and Carl Lincoln mean nothing to you? Do you sneer at Jesus Carl Christ? Are you clever than Albert Carlstein and Isaacarl Newton? Did Magna Carlta die in vain?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 5, 2009 at 8:26 AM
Oh my gosh, your right, my name isn't Carl! What am I going to do now!? I gotta go find a place to get my name changed right away!!ReplyDelete
On a serious note, your comment made me laugh, and attacks on me don't usually do that.
True story: when I first played Pokemon Blue all those years ago, I named all of the creatures I caught "Carl". Then, one day, I went to the name changer in Lavender Town, because one of my friends wanted it to be called "Carla" instead. You know what happened? He wouldn't let me. The guy just went "He's called Carl. There's no way you can improve on that." But in the end he relented.ReplyDelete
Now it's called Carly McCarlson. Yeah, you're thinking "that's too many characters".
Not with the power of Carl.
Peace out, folks,
Ann Carl Apolis, M.D.
"@Rob: Don't call me half witted. You don't know me. Were on the internet, so thats statement is more true than ever. I do like XKCD, so when I see someone dedicate an entire website to dislike of it, I have some questions, which Carl was at least honorable to respond to."ReplyDelete
Oops too late CAN'T TAKE IT BACK. By the way, it's "We're." "WE'RE on the internet." And "that" doesn't have an s at the end. I'd go back to your original post but that'd require more effort than I'm willing to expend on you.
Accusation stands.
lol Ann Apolis. Anyway I was thinking that, but it's also got an air of like patronization. Like "aww look at da widdle gurl tryna be nerdy" maybe. Maybe not that extreme, but BLAH.ReplyDelete
This was hands down hillarious, but then again probably because I've spent a fair amoubnt of time on 4chan.ReplyDelete
Damn...one shot(with the exceptions of hat and the like) comics and their utter lack of continuity and character realism. One of these days Randy...on of these daysReplyDelete
- MichaelJune 29, 2009 at 8:45 PM
"this is why people want to punch you in the face."ReplyDelete
I know you're all into ad hominem attacks, at least against Randall Munroe, on this blog, but seriously - physical violence? That's a step too far.
i would like to state for the record that I do not condone any physical attack on Randall Munroe. The fact that his comics make some people want to punch him does not mean that they should, at least as far as this blog is concerned.ReplyDelete
saying mean things about him is ok though.
- AnonymousAugust 30, 2009 at 9:03 AM
um, stephenie actually does monitor her fansites.ReplyDelete
it's part of what's pathetic about her.


text:
My boyfriend and I broke up last month. I thought I'd be OK by now, but I'm totally miserable. What can I do to feel better?
– Stacey*
Recovering from a break-up isn't easy. To help you deal with your grief, combat sadness, and boost self-esteem, try:
Sometimes, though, even when people are really trying to feel better, they may need some extra help recovering from a break-up. Talking to a counselor or other mental health professional can help them sort through their feelings and begin to feel better.
*Names have been changed to protect user privacy.
Reviewed by: D'Arcy Lyness, PhD
Date Reviewed: 14-05-2013

subset: commoncrawl


text:
For those who "Love that Chicken from Popeye's," a brand new, updated version will soon be opening.
Construction has started next to Popeye's for their new building which will replace the one that is there now. Assistant Manager Marquica Chambers said the reason for the rebuild is that Popeye's is re-imaging all of its stores. She said the new store will have several updates including a spice rack, self-serve drink stand, two bathrooms with two stalls, pictures on the walls and new lighting.
"It will be more of a sit down and eat type restaurant environment," Chambers said. "I know everyone will love it."
"It's going to be like ones you see in Baton Rouge and New Orleans," General Manager Evelyne Dukes said. "We're looking forward to it bringing us new customers and a new atmosphere."
The contractor handling the project is experienced in this type of construction. General Contractor Darrell Griffin said he is one of two approved contractors for Popeye's. His company has built about 600 Popeye's, and done a lot of the re-imaging. He said he has been building restaurants for 55 years and in 30 states.
Once the new building is finished, they will tear down the old Popeye's building and that space will be used for a parking lot. They are scheduled to finish construction around late July and their projected date for the new building opening is the second week of August.


text:
Groton hiking trails lawsuit appears to be heading to trial
Groton - A long-pending lawsuit against the town over the hiking trails appearing on private property seems to be inching closer to trial.
The focus of the suit is a series of trails on private property off Route 117 that property owners claim were cleared by the town sometime around 2005, and link to trails used for walking and mountain biking on the 240-acre, town-owned Copp family property.
While the town admits there was no clear boundary line separating private from town property in the area in question, Groton denies it had anything to do with clearing the trails or creating maps indicating there were trails on private land. The town points to evidence that a network of trails has existed in the area since the late 1970s and outside groups created the maps.
Michael Haines, who purchased his North Road property in 2001 and is a plaintiff in the case, said it was 2006 when he noticed missing swaths of mountain laurel and small trees, painted trail markers and wooden trail signs pointing to the cave and natural arch on his property. The trail markers extend onto the Copp property, he said.
"Who created the Copp property trails? Was it marauding band of trail builders?" Haines asked. "This was a concerted effort and quite a large operation. The trail on my property goes through wetlands in the middle of my property in a big oval, cutting down trees and vegetation.
"The town's position is, somebody anonymous did it. They take no responsibility for it," Haines said. "The funny part about it is a large portion of it is on the Copp property. They haven't done anything about it. Why hasn't the town investigated this?"
Haines, along with North Road homeowners Edward Conroy and Bouthanom Senphansiry, filed suit against the town in 2009 claiming it was the town's Parks and Recreation Department that got carried away.
They claim $250,000 in damages.
Attorney James Tallberg, who is representing the town, said he could not discuss details of the case while the suit is pending.
"The town vigorously denies these groundless claims, and we look forward to our day in court," he said.
To back his allegations against the town, Haines hired a land surveyor to confirm the trail was on private property. He also hired KB Analytical, which performed an analysis on the paint on trees and confirmed a match to the paint on town property.
Conroy said his wife purchased the property in 2006 and has been frustrated by the lack of action by the town to address his concerns.
"My first concern was liability. There's a 40-foot sheer drop off back there," Conroy said. "We were hoping it wouldn't go this far. They just don't want to own up to it."
Conroy said the town offered $10,000 to each property owner in a pre-trial mediation session to settle the case, but the property owners did not accept the offer. Conroy said they each have spent more than that fighting the case.
The property owners are now without a lawyer. Attorney Renee Houle recently dropped out of the case. Conroy said she was uncomfortable taking the case forward without an eyewitness.
A representative from the town's Parks and Recreation Department could not be reached for comment Thursday. The next court date is a pretrial conference scheduled for April 26.
Fitch's Amara Robinson: from broken back to all-state cheerleader
2Wives, No Anchor owner faces federal narcotics, money laundering charges
Environmentalists, regulators push for Green New Deal for Connecticut


text:
Published On : Jan 2019
Category : Retail
No. of Pages : 113 pages
The retail industry is one of the most dynamically transforming and aggressively expanding industries across the globe. While it is influenced by a number of socio-economic factors at play across different regional markets, some of the key forces that drives it remain the growth in population, financial conditions of the population the industry targets, and the spending power and habits of the consumer. An increased shift of the global population from the conventional brick-and-mortar retail outlets to e-retail websites is one of the most important and influential trends in the retail industry in the present scenario. A vast rise in the number of consumers using smartphones and other digital mediums to access internet and its ever-expanding network, are expected to continue to drive the expanse of the e-retail sector in the next few years, bringing in massive transformations in the way the retail sector operates.
The report puts special emphasis on the most important details of the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market, filtered out with the help of industry-best analytical methods. A detailed and professional overview of the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market has been compiled by industry experts and presented in the most concise manner to present only the details that matter the most. The report analyzes the industrial chain supporting the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market in detail, and includes accurate information about the aspects such as production capacity, efficiency in the utilization of the available production capacity, manufacturing chain, demand and supply dynamics, and industry policies affecting the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market.
The report examines in detail the impact of the key drivers and restraints and the major trends that govern consumer choices of the past and the future on market's overall development over the report's forecast period. The research publication also examines the costing of key products available in the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market with respect to the profit gained by producers, as well as the regulations affecting it. The cost-profit relation is analyzed in greater depth by regional-level segmentation, leading to data that explains the condition of the market in a specific geographical area. This data can be used by the reader for making focused market policies. The relation between key applications of the market and the industry chain is also analyzed with respect to each regional market, to provide a proper understanding of way the market functions.
The study also presents detailed insights into the competitive landscape of the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market and the geographical distribution of the Global hammocks market insights forecast to 2025 market. Business profiles of some of the key players in the market are profiled, including a detailed SWOT analysis that presents an overview of the potential growth trajectory of the market leaders in future years. The study also presents detailed data about the business operations and financial structures of key vendors of the market, presenting an overview of the competitive landscape and aiding in formulating efficient market strategies.
Send an Enquiry


text:
Next Tuesday and Wednesday
The League of Women Voters of the Kewanee Area will host candidate forums on Tuesday, April 2 and Wednesday, April 3 at Kewanee City Hall at 7 p.m.
For the forum on April 2, candidates have been invited for the Kewanee City Council and Black Hawk College Board of Trustees (six-year term and unexpired two-year term).
The April 3 forum will be for candidates for Kewanee Park District commissioner and Kewanee Township supervisor, clerk, road commissioner, assessor and trustees.
For the non-competitive races of Black Hawk College Board of Trustees (unexpired two-year term) and Kewanee Township assessor, the candidates will give only a statement.
On behalf of all Henry County superintendents, Kewanee School Supt. Dr. Chris Sullens and Wethersfield School Supt. Shane Kazubowski will speak April 2 on the school sales tax referendum.
For the rest of the races, the forum will follow a strict format. The candidates will make opening statements. Then the audience members may ask questions, followed by candidates' closing statements.
Usually, the candidates stay afterwards to mingle with the audience and refreshments will be provided.
The forums will be televised live on Comcast Cable TV channel 13.
A list of candidates in all races and referenda in Henry County can be found at www.henrycty.com.
The League of Women Voters is a nonpartisan organization whose main purpose is to help the public become better informed.


text:
Bombardier Transportation Wins UK Rolling Stock Contract
July 31, 2013 Berlin Transportation, Press Release
- UK train operator Southern Railway orders 116 cars with an option for a further 140
Rail technology leader Bombardier Transportation has won a contract for new rolling stock from Southern Railway, which provides services in London and the south east of England. A Spares Supply Agreement has also been signed which will allow Bombardier to support the new trains when they enter service. The contracts have a total value of approximately £180 million GBP (206 million euro, $274 million US).
The new cars will be designed and manufactured at Bombardier's Derby facility. The vehicles will initially be used on the Thameslink route and in the longer term will be cascaded onto other routes. The rolling stock contract includes an option for 140 additional vehicles which, if exercised, would bring the total number of vehicles ordered to 256 and the total value of the order to approximately £385 million GBP (441 million euro, $585 million US).
Bombardier will supply Southern with the latest version of the BOMBARDIER ELECTROSTAR family of electrical multiple units, capable of 110 mph operation. The ELECTROSTAR has a well proven track record for reliability and environmental performance and is in daily passenger service with other UK train operators, including c2c, Southeastern, London Overground, and Stansted Express. The Gautrain railway in Johannesburg, South Africa, also operates ELECTROSTAR trains.
Over 800 Bombardier trains serve London every day, supported by 700 employees on
12 sites. This is the latest in a series of contract wins and successful projects for the company in London. On the Underground, Bombardier delivered the Victoria Line upgrade project on time and under budget, and is in the process of delivering upgraded trains for the sub-surface lines. Bombardier has also delivered all the new rolling stock for the London Overground service, and provides a maintenance service for those trains at Transport for London's New Cross Gate depot. During the London 2012 Olympics, Bombardier maintenance teams and support functions worked around the clock to deliver increased reliability and ensure that Bombardier trains on nine key routes serving London were able to meet the unprecedented demand from the record number of passengers travelling on the network.
About Bombardier Transportation
Bombardier Transportation, a global leader in rail technology, offers the broadest portfolio in the rail industry and delivers innovative products and services that set new standards in sustainable mobility. BOMBARDIER ECO4 technologies – built on the four cornerstones of energy, efficiency, economy and ecology – conserve energy, protect the environment and help to improve total train performance for operators and passengers. With over 3,200 people employed at eight Bombardier sites and 31 customer locations across the UK, Bombardier has delivered, or has on order, more than 60 per cent of the UK's existing fleet and currently maintains around 40 per cent of the UK's rolling stock. Bombardier has over 50 years' experience in providing the latest signalling technology to the UK rail network.
Bombardier Transportation is headquartered in Berlin, Germany, and has a very diverse customer base with products or services in more than 60 countries. It has an installed base of over 100,000 vehicles worldwide.
About Bombardier
Bombardier is the world's only manufacturer of both planes and trains. Looking far ahead while delivering today, Bombardier is evolving mobility worldwide by answering the call for more efficient, sustainable and enjoyable transportation everywhere. Our vehicles, services and, most of all, our employees are what make us a global leader in transportation.
Bombardier is headquartered in Montréal, Canada. Our shares are traded on the Toronto Stock Exchange (BBD) and we are listed on the Dow Jones Sustainability World and North America Indexes. In the fiscal year ended December 31, 2012, we posted revenues of $16.8 billion. News and information are available at bombardier.com or follow us on Twitter @Bombardier.
Notes to Editors
For news releases, related material and photos, visit our media centre at
Follow Bombardier Transportation on Twitter @BombardierRail.
BOMBARDIER, ELECTROSTAR and ECO4 are trademarks of Bombardier Inc. or its subsidiaries.
For Information
Australia and New Zealand: +61 3 9794 2223
John Ince
Canada: +1 450 441 3007
Marc Laforge
China: +86 10 8517 2268
Flora Long
Germany, Austria, Switzerland, Central and Eastern Europe: +49 30 98607 1134
Immo von Fallois
France, Benelux and North Africa: +33 6 07 78 95 38
Anne Froger
India and Japan: +91 7 838 660 093
Harsh Mehta
Mexico: +52 55 5093 7714
Paulina Ortega
Nordic and Baltic Countries: +46 10 852 5213
Pär Isaksson
South East Asia: +65 6478 6235
Evon Lam
Southern Africa, Turkey and Israel: +49 30 98607 1147
Sandy Roth
Southern Europe and South America: +35 1 919 693 728
Luis Ramos
UK and Middle East: +44 7785 450 065
Stephen Bethel
Maryanne Roberts


text:
4:00 am
Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood "Daniel Plays Ball/O Builds A Tower" Daniel Plays Ball - Daniel, Miss Elaina and Prince Wednesday are at the park with Prince Tuesday. They decide to play a game with a ball. Daniel struggles to catch the ball and gets very frustrated. D
4:30 am
Martha Speaks "Therapy Dog/Martha's Duck Trouble" Therapy Dog - Martha becomes a hospital therapy dog, spreading cheer among the patients. Martha's Duck Trouble - Ralph, the wounded duck from the lake, has settled in at Martha's house to convalesce.G
5:00 am
NOVA "Mind of a Rampage Killer" NOVA correspondent Miles O'Brien investigates new theories about why some people become destructive rampage killers. O'Brien also explores what science can reveal about a brain at risk for violence and whether there is a way to recognize dangerous minds in time to stop violence.G
6:00 am
Rick Steves' Europe "European Travel Skills, Part 2" Rick's travel tips includes planning an itinerary, hurdling the language barrier, traveling by car or train and avoiding scams. Part 2 of 3G
6:30 am
Rudy Maxa's World "Tahiti & Bora Bora" For sheer tropical splendor, the islands of Tahiti and Bora Bora stand alone. Hyper blue lagoons, white-sand beaches, fish of every shape, size and color, as well as a generous and welcoming people make these islands favorite destinations for travelers from around the world. Lush aerial photography is a highlight of this episode. D
7:00 am
The Desert Speaks "Medieval Drought in the Southwest" Between roughly 900 and 1260 AD there was a massive drought that severely impacted the plants, animals and people of the Southwest. Now referred to as the Medieval Drought, the best records of this phenomenon can be found within the trees that lived through this difficult time period. Host David Yetman hikes with Tom Swetnam from the University of Arizona's Laboratory of Tree-Ring Research through the White Mountains of California and Sequoia National Park to observe how scientists use tree rings to gather evidence of climate conditions from thousands of years ago. D
7:30 am
Chef John Besh's New Orleans Quail Gumbo and Dewberry Streusel Pie. D
8:00 am
Lidia's Italy In America "USA: Shrimp, Shrimp, and More Shrimp" Lidia takes viewers on a journey to Italy to learn about pepperoncino, a quintessential ingredient in any Fra Diavolo dish. Tanya shows viewers that Italian Americans are internationally recognized for their great cuisine, which can be found everywhere from Sonoma, California to St. Louis, Missouri to Boston's North End. D
8:30 am
GardenSMART To dazzle passersby in early spring, you need to think about planting bulbs in the fall. Daffodils, tulips, and many other unusual bulbs are easy to grow but need advance planting. Be sure to tune in to GardenSMART for expert bulb growing tips. D
9:00 am
Christina "Skip The Junk Food....Feel The Joy" They call it junk food because it's just that.junk. Completely unfit for human consumption, most of what we eat is robbing us of our health. D
9:30 am
Cook's Country from America's Test Kitchen "Dinner at the Diner" Test cook Bridget Lancaster updates a classic recipe for Patty Melts. Then, tasting expert Jack Bishop challenges host Christopher Kimball to a tasting of mac and cheese. Next, equipment expert Adam Ried reveals his top picks for commuter mugs. D
10:00 am
Austin City Limits "Esperanza Spalding" The jazz/soul singer/bassist performs selections from her album Radio Music Society.G
11:00 am
Sesame Street "Sesame Street Y A Quest Y Not" How to be a Knight for a Day. Hooray! Telly, Abby and Elmo look to the book to tell them how to become knights. First, they have to wear a suit of shining armor. D
12:00 pm
Dinosaur Train "Elmer Elasmosaurus/Dinosaur Block Party" Elmer Elasmosaurus - The Pteranodon family travels on the Dinosaur Train with the Aquacar to an underwater train station to transport Elmer Elasmosaurus back to his home in the ocean. At first Buddy is not enthusiastic about travelling underwater, but quickly becomes a convert when he sees the spectacular sights under the sea. Dinosaur Block Party - The Pteranodon family hosts a block party to introduce their new neighbors, the Lambeosaurus family, to all the other neighborhood creatures. D
12:30 pm
Super Why! "Monty's Adventures In Music Town" And a 1, and a 2 and a 1, 2, 3! The kids are playing in the school band, but Red doesn't know what instrument to play! The super readers soar into the book Monty's Adventures in Music Town and meet a loveable monster named Monty who has the very same problem. Will the super readers be able to help Monty pick an instrument before the big show, or will their efforts fall flat? Educational Objectives: To learn some basic music concepts. Young viewers will catch the alphabet, rhyme with OW words, find out what the word "woodwind" means, and use the power to read to change the story. D
1:00 pm
Cat in the Hat Knows A Lot About That! "Show Me The Honey/Migration Vacation" Show Me the Honey - Sally and Nick have run out of honey! Luckily the Cat knows just where to go to get more. They visit Queen Priscilla Buzzoo who invites them to join in the bee dance to learn how to make honey. Migration Vacation - The purple martin swallow that lives in Sally's backyard has gone missing! The Cat, with the help of a variety of forest creatures, help Nick and Sally track down the bird, and learn how and why birds migrate. D
1:30 pm
Wild Kratts "Snow Runners" On their way to return some Hispid hares to Asia, the Wild Kratts accidentally lose them in a wintery North American forest. Martin and Chris must use the amazing winter adaptations and strategies of the Snowshoe hare and lynx to locate the hares before it's too late. D
2:00 pm
Dialogue for Kids "Nutrition" Nutrition is the science of food and how it impacts your body. Joan Cartan-Hansen and her guest scientists Ruth Schneider, Associate Professor Of Nutrition, Idaho State University, and Colleen Fillmore, Director, Child Nutrition Program, Idaho State Department Of Education, answer students' questions about nutrition.G
2:30 pm
Rick Steves' Europe "Basque Country" Rick visits the proud and resilient Basque people's homeland, which is split between France and Spain. From his base in San Sebastian, Rick tours the ancient Basque capital of Gernika, the dazzling Guggenheim Modern in Bilbao, and then crosses into France for more Basque Country charms. From tapa bars to lightning-fast jai alai games, he shares the experiences of Basque culture.G
3:00 pm
Antiques Roadshow "Myrtle Beach, Hour One" Host Mark L. Walberg and appraiser Eric Silver visit Brookgreen Gardens to discuss early 20th-century female sculptors. Appraiser Debra Force discovers a Joseph Henry Sharp oil painting valued at $400,000, leaving the guest feeling as sunny as Myrtle Beach itself. Part 1 of 3G
4:00 pm
PBS NewsHour NULL
5:00 pm
Globe Trekker "Panama & Colombia" Megan explores two countries that are refreshingly untouched by mass tourism.G
6:00 pm
Outdoor Idaho "Boat Builders" Idaho's boat builders draw on old craft techniques as well as new technology to rebuild wooden boats or design new ones. Whether working on a 1939 speedster or creating new drift boats, they turn out stylish products for Idaho's waters.G
6:30 pm
Dialogue "Miss Representation" Filmmaker Jennifer Seibel Newsom talks with host Marcia Franklin about making the documentary, Miss Representation, which explores how inaccurate portrayals of women by the media are connected to the under-representation of women in positions of power and influence.G
7:00 pm
Idaho Reports 2013 Host Greg Hahn, with a panel of news professionals, plus political analysts, examines the week's events at the Idaho Legislature.G
8:00 pm
Pacific Heartbeat "Under A Jarvis Moon" Under a Jarvis Moon is the story of 130 young men from Hawai'i who, from the late 1930s through the early years of World War II, were part of a clandestine mission by the U.S. federal government to occupy desert islands in the middle of the Pacific. The first wave of these colonists were Hawaiian high school students, chosen because government officials assumed Pacific Islanders could best survive the harsh conditions present on the tiny, isolated islands. D
9:00 pm
Globe Trekker "Panama & Colombia" Megan explores two countries that are refreshingly untouched by mass tourism.G
10:00 pm
Outdoor Idaho "Boat Builders" Idaho's boat builders draw on old craft techniques as well as new technology to rebuild wooden boats or design new ones. Whether working on a 1939 speedster or creating new drift boats, they turn out stylish products for Idaho's waters.G
10:30 pm
Dialogue "Miss Representation" Filmmaker Jennifer Seibel Newsom talks with host Marcia Franklin about making the documentary, Miss Representation, which explores how inaccurate portrayals of women by the media are connected to the under-representation of women in positions of power and influence.G
11:00 pm
Idaho Reports 2013 Host Greg Hahn, with a panel of news professionals, plus political analysts, examines the week's events at the Idaho Legislature.G


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The act of designing and building a house is much like writing and staging a play, says a man who knows the connection between wood and words.
Donnie Laflamme, actor, director, teacher, co-ordinator of Algonquin College's Theatre Arts Program and part-time renovator, is adding a new skill set to his repertoire: building an ultra-modern home on Gladstone Avenue in his childhood neighbourhood of Hintonburg.
The dramatic Laflamme is becoming a developer, set to start a corrugated metal and stained cedar home on what has to be one of the city's smallest stages: a wee lot that is only 20 feet across and 50 feet deep.
The proposed three-storey will sit on the side yard where Laflamme is finishing off renovations to his very traditional home at 1129 Gladstone Ave.
Right now his large white truck is parked in that side yard, leaving barely enough room to squeeze a second car alongside.
A high wooden fence provides privacy to the back half of the grassed lot, with a lawn mower sitting behind his home.
"There won't be much need for the mower," says Laflamme, who explains the machine actually bounces between neighbours when needed, a sharing program that helps explain why he relishes living in a community where worn homes sit next to pristine brick ones and carefully groomed gardens.
It's difficult to imagine a house on his tiny site.
"Building a house is like putting on a play. The street is a stage and the house is a performance, a story," says Laflamme, who wrote the Mechanicsville Monologues, a series of rowdy tales of life in the working-class community that has been staged between pints of beer and laughter in the Carleton Tavern. "The house is going to be a little jewel. It will be a well-fitted leather jacket. Maybe a little gritty," says Laflamme, 46.
He got the development bug after renovating his Gladstone home and a home on Sherbrooke Avenue K— blame a meeting of the Hintonburg Community Association in January where he listened to architects Jim Colizza and Anthony Bruni talk about urban homes on small lots.
Colizza and Bruni (colizzabruni.com) are experts at developing small lots, recently winning provincial honours from the Ontario Association of Architects for a Hintonburg home.
"Jim Colizza took a look at my land and within two minutes said he could design a house," says Laflamme, who got the backing of the Hintonburg planning committee and then the approval of City Hall.
The modest house on a tiny lot will add a modern element to the changing neighbourhood.
The Colizza-Bruni design features a module containing the kitchen on the second floor and a bathroom on the third floor that will be cantilevered out over the side, sheltering the front door and providing a parking spot.
However, Laflamme, who plans to sell his white house next door and live in the new house while searching for other development opportunities in Hintonburg, won't be parking his truck at the new home. It's too big. He will stash it nearby.
The trick to success when building on a small lot is how to handle the car, says Colizza, noting a lot of people were not happy when a developer in Old Ottawa South wanted to add a row of townhomes, but a row of garages faced the street. Every single home in Ottawa needs parking for one car, says the architect.
Colizza compromised, providing an outdoor parking spot for a medium-sized car under the cantilevered feature. "Once you handle parking, then you move onto a relationship between house and the street," says Colizza, who integrated glass facing the street and a second-level deck.
Inside, he kept the design simple and open for the 1,100-square-foot home, which will have a bedroom on the main, street level and a second bedroom and bathroom on the third level.
"There won't be any walls on the main level. It will be very clean and simple. It will be very livable," says Colizza. The home also includes a front porch and a dining and living room on the second floor.
The house is in direct contrast to Laflamme's white frame house next door. Built in the late 1800s, it belonged to a shoemaker who worked by a big front window looking out over the busy street. Yet the energy smart design of the infill project mimics features of a nearby modern row of townhomes that are coated in silver corrugated metal.
"There is so much diversity in this neighbourhood. This house is going to fit in," says Laflamme, who grew up a few blocks away and comes from three generations of builders. "When you build a house, it will be here long after we are gone. So, you have to do it well. It should reach out to the street."
He plans to use basic materials, including finished plywood floors and maple countertops in the kitchen, and to hire friends and colleagues from Hintonburg when construction starts this month. "I want to keep the house as local as possible. I don't like big houses. Small is best. The tiny house movement is really ramping up."


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I am from Extremeskins.com. I see through various threads that you guys don't have too high of an opinion of that place. I can tell you that its a great site with dedicated and passionate membership and I love it there.
But, we absolutely love our football talk, and that's what I came here to do.
Much like you guys, I can't wait for the match up on Sunday. I like to call it the Main Event of Wildcard Weekend.
All season long, I've enjoyed the moments I've gotten to watch your Seahawks. I love your attacking defense. Mebane and Red Bryant are dangerous up front. They're tough to run on. Wagner is for sure a candidate for defensive rookie of the year, if not the defensive rookie of the year. Mentioning your corners isn't worth it, those two can play with the best of them, which is probably why you guys enjoy the 1 high man concept that you employ so often. With Browner and Sherman on the outside you can essentially shut down the field from hash to sideline. Despite the praise I've given elsewhere, I'm probably most impressed with your safeties. Chancellor is a hard hitting, fly around kind of defender. Earl Thomas is a ballhawk of a free safety.
From what I've seen, your weakness on defense is 3rd down efficiency. Your pass rush isn't great on third downs, which is why I believe a big key to this game is 3rd down. The Redskins MUST win the matchup on first down, which I believe is gaining four or more yards. Third and medium is decent territory for the Redskins offense to convert, as the playaction will come into play, an area of defense that Seattle is ranked 24th league wide against. The zone read action that we run, that I'm sure you're all quite familiar with, has to be respected, as it does with your opponents. In 3rd and long situations, Seattle's coverage unit will be tough to crack. We have to stay in manageable situations on third down. Due to your aggressive defense, it'll be tough for them to stay home on meaningful third down situations, which will open up the hook zones a bit to allow Griffin some throwing room. If your safeties begin to cheat up, the 'Skins will start taking more shots deep. It's one of those situations that I really like as its an aggressive, attacking style of offense, but it also scares me with Earl Thomas patrolling back there.
I'm interested to see how Seattle matches up against various formations. From our "Uzi" set, which is the fullhouse backfield out of Pistol, to formations which align Garcon in the slot. I have to wonder if they'll move Browner or Sherman on Garcon on the inside. Stopping Alfred Morris will be a key component to Seattle's success, because if he gets going the read option/read option pass is going to be a tough play to stop.
There is an intriguing matchup on the other side of the ball as well. Our defensive leader, and best defensive player was named NFC Defensive Player of the Month. Your quarterback was named NFC Rookie of the Month. That'll be a fun one to watch.
I think in general, your receivers match up favorably with our DBs, especially our safeties. DeAngelo Hall and Josh Wilson can be very, very good on the outside, or they can be very, very bad. Golden Tate always seems to get YAC. Madieu Williams at free safety concerns me the most. He's very prone in coverage. Both of our safeties come up and play the alley quite well versus run, but Williams also has a knack for missing tackles and allowing runners to spring free. That's where Marshawn Lynch is most dangerous. He's a guy that you absolutely have to tackle or he'll tear you to shreds. And much like with Washington's offense and Morris, if Lynch gets going opposing defenses are in a world of hurt. And also similar to Washington's offense, once your running game gets going, so does your play action game.
The key to both teams is stopping the running game and forcing teams to be one dimensional.
As a 'Skins fan, I truly believe Griffin deserves to be the offensive rookie of the year, but I have no qualms with Russell Wilson receiving that honor. He's been a very, very good player and he reminds me a lot of Fran Tarkenton (or, rather, what I've seen of Tarkenton on film). The key is blitzing him and forcing him off his spot and THEN containing him. Easier said than done. I almost feel that the 'Skins D will be safer forcing him from his spot and then once he moves not over committing to chasing him, or he'll pull the shoulder switch evasion technique I've seen him use many times. We have to make him make quick decisions.
From a fan of the game, this is an intriguing match up. Both attacking defenses (yours is better, in my opinion), both "new age" offenses. Both teams are built completely on their running game. It will be the most exciting game of the year, or it should be anyways.
We all know who I'm rooting for, but I think all of us have two things in common:
1) Hope for no injuries
2) That whichever QB, Russell or Griffin wins Rookie of the Year, at least it's not Andrew Luck, who doesn't stack up to either one of our quarterbacks.


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Not long ago, Pad & Quill announced the latest addition to their exquisite line of iPad cases, the Aria. If you're familiar with Pad & Quill, you already know that these are some of the finest cases you can find for your iPad, and the Aria is no exception. Made with robust stitching from Full Grain American leather and hand finished wood, the Aria provides multiple self propping angles for viewing and a magnetic on/off feature when the case closes. You simply can't beat Pad & Quill when it comes to quality, and these are cases that would please even the most discriminating iPad owners.
We are happy to team up once again with Pad & Quill to offer our readers a chance at winning one of these amazing cases! To enter, head over to the links below and check out the Aria line, then come back here and let us know which color combination is your favorite, and which iPad you have. We will choose two lucky winners and announce it here on the blogs, so be sure to check back next week to see if you're a winner. And if you don't want to wait around to see if you've won, you can use coupon code MOR88 right now to save 15% off any case at Pad & Quill. The coupon is only good for a limited time, so be sure to use it soon if you're interested. Good luck everyone!
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5:30 am
Hey Kids, Let's Cook "Taco Salad" Who doesn't love tacos? A healthy Mexican meal that includes the meat, lettuce, cheese, and salsa all stuffed together in a crunchy shell. And today we're going to show you a little twist to that recipe, it's taco salad. D
6:00 am
Sara's Weeknight Meals "Appetizers for Dinner" It's Super Bowl time, and for the big game try appetizers - simple foods you can eat with your hands. Sara's got Chorizo Chicken Wings with a secret ingredient - guys will love 'em! Asian-Style Pork Sliders combine juicy pork with the cool crunch of fresh veggies. Beer Batter Shrimp is super crispy yet light and marries well with a zesty Asian dipping sauce. D
6:30 am
Art of Food with Wendy Brodie "Abalone" Brodie and her guest chefs illustrate how to open, t tenderize and saut these sea mollusks. D
7:00 am
Grand View "Great Basin National Park" NULL
7:30 am
New Fly Fisher "Hawke River Atlantics" NULL
8:00 am
Ask This Old House "Using Ladders Safely/Replacing A Shower Valve" General contractor Tom Silva and host Kevin O'Connor demonstrate how to use all types of ladders safely. Then plumbing and heating expert Richard Trethewey replaces a three-handle shower valve with a single-handle anti-scald valve. D
8:30 am
Rough Cut - Woodworking with Tommy Mac "Trestle Table" This week on Rough Cut, host Tommy MacDonald tackles a Trestle Table, perfect for any kitchen.G
9:00 am
P. Allen Smith's Garden Home "Texture, Pattern and Rhythm" Smith demonstrates the three design elements throughout his garden. He also offers tips on taking care of espalier fruit trees.G
9:30 am
Katie Brown Workshop "Welcome" Katie and the Workshop crew put a creative spin on the traditional welcoming party for new neighbors with a mailbox vase and personalized steamer trays. Learn how to make tasty chicken kebabs and a tiramisu bowl. D
10:00 am
Travelscope "St. Vincent & the Grenadines - Close to Home, but a World Away" Thirty-two beautiful islands, off the beaten track, yet in your backyard, is what Joseph discovers on his St. Vincent & the Grenadines adventure. These stunning Caribbean isles offer a wide range of water activities from snorkeling and diving to swimming and sailing. D
10:30 am
Barbecue University with Steven Raichlen "Florida" There is a Caribbean flavor to jalapeno jerk baby back ribs, grilled bananas with spiced butter and rum, and salmon kebabs skewered on sugarcane with sour orange mojo.G
11:00 am
Primal Grill with Steven Raichlen "Barbecue's Birthplace" In 1516, a Spanish explorer encountered a band of Taino Indians roasting game and seafood on a wooden frame over a smoky fire. They called the cooking device a barbacoa-the origin of modern barbecue. This show takes us to the birthplace of barbecue-the Caribbean-where you'll learn to make Jamaican jerk chicken, buccaneer baby back ribs with pineapple barbecue sauce, and a Raichlen classic: shrimp grilled on sugarcane. D
11:30 am
Burt Wolf: Travels & Traditions "U.S. Virgin Islands" Columbus visited these islands during his second voyage and thought they were so beautiful that he named them after the 11,000 virgins of Saint Ursula. Burt tours the three major islands of St. Thomas, St. D
12:00 pm
Assessment In Math and Science: What's The Point? "What'd I Get?" Well-designed performance tasks give teachers the information necessary to evaluate the depth of students' understanding but how can teachers determine nquality work? This workshop demonstrates how teachers can construct assessment tools for benchmarks of student understanding. The role of students in the construction of scoring tools and the process of assessment will be a primary focus. D
1:30 pm
Rediscovering Biology: Molecular to Global Perspectives "Session 2. Proteins and Proteomics" Researchers know it is the proteins made by a cell that determine what that cell does. This session explores the varying complements of proteins and their effects, structures, and interactions within the mechanism of cell function, and introduces the larger picture of proteomics and systems biology. D
2:00 pm
Whole Child, The: A Caregiver's Guide to the First Five Years "I'm Glad I'm Me" Recognizing children's accomplishments and offering opportunities for individual choice. D
2:30 pm
Whole Child, The: A Caregiver's Guide to the First Five Years "Listening to Families" Ways to help families deal with everyday problems and life crises. D
3:00 pm
Social Studies In Action: A Methodology Workshop, K-5 "Workshop 1. Teaching Social Studies" Why do we teach social studies? This session focuses on the relevance of teaching social studies and discusses strategies for helping students gain a deeper understanding of social studies content. The onscreen teachers review standards and themes developed by the National Council for the Social Studies (NCSS) and view video clips from the Social Studies in Action video library to identify examples of powerful teaching and learning. D
4:00 pm
Looking at Learning....Again Part 2 "Behind The Design" With Philip Sadler, Ed.D. Young children are natural designers and builders, but if their interest is not fostered, it may wane as they move through the grades. D
5:00 pm
Hands On Crafts for Kids "Right In Your Own Backyard" Today's theme is crafting right in your own back yard. Seed packet flowers are first and you can even plant them. Then, it's a clay nest and eggs. D
5:30 pm
Hey Kids, Let's Cook "Taco Salad" Who doesn't love tacos? A healthy Mexican meal that includes the meat, lettuce, cheese, and salsa all stuffed together in a crunchy shell. And today we're going to show you a little twist to that recipe, it's taco salad. D
6:00 pm
Jacques Pepin: More Fast Food My Way "Game Day Pressure" Jacques makes crunchy kale and shows how to make chile without fuss in a pressure cooker. Dessert is pearsbonne femme, easy and decadent.G
6:30 pm
America's Test Kitchen from Cook's Illustrated "Backyard Chicken Dinner" Test cook Julia Collin Davison uncovers the secrets to Grill-Smoked Chicken and serves it with Salt-Baked Potatoes. And finally, equipment expert Adam Ried reveals his pick for the perfect cooler in the Equipment Corner. D
7:00 pm
Kimchi Chronicles "The Noodle and Dumpling Chronicles" Like an Italian with a bowl of spaghetti or tortellini, nothing satisfies a Korean more than eating a bowl of noodles or dumplings. In Korea, slurping is not only permitted, it is considered a compliment to the cook. This episode features a restaurant in Seoul known for its nenngymyun, an unusual dish of elastic buckwheat noodles served with ice-cold beef broth. D
7:30 pm
Christina "Cook Your Way to Health" Is it possible? Can we cook to create joy? Well, if junk food makes us feel bloated and lethargic, depressed and fat, it only makes sense that healthy natural food would make us feel happy, contented and vital. And just thinking about hot fudge sundaes should take the sting out of healthy eating. D
8:00 pm
Heart of Perfect Health with Brenda Watson Internationally renowned digestive care expert Brenda Watson returns to Public Television in with her new program The Heart of Perfect Health. In this program, Brenda shares compelling evidence of the connection between digestive health and heart health, and includes easy, simple ways to protect and strengthen the heart by balancing the gut and achieving healthy digestion. Throughout her career in health care, Brenda has been a passionate advocate and educator regarding the connection between a healthy digestive system and total body health. D
9:30 pm
Jacques Pepin: More Fast Food My Way "Game Day Pressure" Jacques makes crunchy kale and shows how to make chile without fuss in a pressure cooker. Dessert is pearsbonne femme, easy and decadent.G
10:00 pm
America's Test Kitchen from Cook's Illustrated "Backyard Chicken Dinner" Test cook Julia Collin Davison uncovers the secrets to Grill-Smoked Chicken and serves it with Salt-Baked Potatoes. And finally, equipment expert Adam Ried reveals his pick for the perfect cooler in the Equipment Corner. D
10:30 pm
Mexico -- One Plate at a Time with Rick Bayless "Sustainable Aquaculture in the Rich Waters of Ensenada" Two of Ensenada's best seafood chefs, Benito Molina and Alain Genchi, join Rick for a lesson in mollusk farming. Juan Carlos Lapuente of Acuacultura Integral de Baja California takes the trio to the rich coastal waters to see oyster and mussel farming. Along the way, we learn that the quality of these waters is what makes the seafood from this area so outstanding. D
11:00 pm
Caprial and John's Kitchen: Cooking for Family and Friends "Clams" The Pences show how to find and prepare the best clams as they fix clams steamed with brown butter and pasta with spicy red clam sauce.G
11:30 pm
Rick Steves' Europe "Venice and Its Lagoon" Rick samples sumptuous art treasures, and explores back-street wonders. He cruises its lagoon, stopping in fiery Murano for glass, pastel Burano for lace, and murky Torcello for a sense of where Venice was born. Part 2 of 2G


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The holidays are in the rear view mirror now and it's time to settle into some cozy winter nesting. And, of course, there that's annual New Year's resolution to eat healthier. So take some time to decompress from the hectic pace of last month and get re-energized in the kitchen – and see if you've got what it takes to be a 'Top Chef." It's not that hard to create some great comforting foods to warm the heart and soul, and get everyone on track with that New Year's resolution. Home cooking with real ingredients is inherently healthier – and can be surprisingly easy. With a few simple changes, you can make a big difference in the healthfulness of everyday meals.
"By adding herbs and spices, it's easy to make healthy foods more flavorful. And it's a smart way to freshen up your family's standby recipes while gradually reducing reliance on sugar, sodium or fat," said Chef Mark Garcia, of the McCormick Kitchens.
For freshened-up family favorites, try making these simple, healthful changes that are simply delicious:
• Replace the heavy breading on chicken tenders with a flour mixture spiced with paprika, black pepper and oregano. Bake it in the oven to reduce fat and calories.
• For a healthier take on beef stew, use low sodium broth and serve over whole grain pasta or brown rice instead of mashed
• For a delicious twist on traditional chili, try using boneless, skinless chicken breasts with black beans and corn. Pump up the authentic Southwest flavor with cumin, garlic powder and red pepper.
Try adding some new recipes to your kitchen repertoire.
Hearty Beef Stew with Roasted Vegetables
Roasting the vegetables before adding them to the stew brings out delicious caramelized flavors.


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Joshua Laney reviews the
2016 GMC Sierra 1500
he purchased from
Mountain View Ford Lincoln
in Chattanooga TN
Joshua Laney reviews a
2016 GMC Sierra 1500
Mountain View Ford Lincoln
in Chattanooga TN
"Good job. "
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Our Team of Auto Financing Specialists Serving Lookout Mountain, Collegedale and Ringgold is Committed to Helping You Make it Happen. Whether you've settled on a new Focus, Fusion, Escape, Explorer, F150 or used car from Mtn. View Ford Lincoln, the chances are you need a car loan or Ford lease. Perhaps you don't know which option would best suit your lifestyle and/or budget. Well, Mtn. View Ford Lincoln of Chattanooga is here to offer you counsel. Already know which suits you better (loan or lease)?
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Mountain View Ford Lincoln is proud to be the only Ford Lincoln dealer in Chattanooga! We have a Ford vehicle for every driver no matter what your needs are! We have a great selection of the Ford F-150, Fusion, Escape and more! Our commitment to you is to provide you with a great car-buying experience from beginning to end! So no matter if you're from Chattanooga, Knoxville, Huntsville, Nashville, Hixson or other area, we promise to deliver you excellent customer service- we were voted Best of the Best Chattanooga, after all.
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Satisfy Your Ford Urge by Visiting Mtn. View Ford Lincoln, Proudly Serving Drivers from Chattanooga, Lookout Mountain, Collegedale and Ringgold.
We are a Ford and Lincoln dealership located in Chattanooga, TN, and we take pride in serving the surrounding area. We offer a large inventory of new and used Ford vehicles, such as the Ford Focus, Fusion, Escape and F-150. We also offer a selection of certified pre-owned vehicles, as well as used vehicles of other makes and models.
At Mountain View Ford, we want to provide for all of your automotive needs in one convenient location. Our new and used sales departments can help you find the right vehicle for the right price, and our finance department is ready to help you work out the details. Our parts and service departments are available to take care of all of your vehicle's maintenance and repair needs as well. We are completely committed to customer service and satisfaction, and we will strive to make your experience with Mountain View Ford enjoyable and convenient throughout the life of your vehicle. Please call us at 423-763-0316 for your no-obligation Internet price quote or for any additional information.
Here at Mtn. View Ford Lincoln we're serving drivers in Lookout Mountain, Collegedale and Ringgold with all of their automotive needs. Whether a new or used car is in order or a little maintenance is required, visit us at 301 E. 20th St. Chattanooga, Tennessee and we'd be happy to help you, too.
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Our skilled and detail-oriented team loves serving your automotive needs. That means when you visit our Chattanooga, Tennessee showroom, you can count on a positive auto service experience, which includes only genuine Ford parts. Whether you're interested in a simple oil change or tire rotation or you've come across a problem that needs to be repaired, our team will work to get you back on the road with a focus on safety, quality and efficiency - because we know nothing is more important to you. If you're interested in seeing what we can do for your Focus, Fusion, Escape, Explorer or F-150, be sure to fill out our online appointment form today. We'll quickly confirm your appointment's details, such as time, date and the specific work that needs to be completed. With Mtn. View Ford Lincoln by your side, you can count on a worry-free driving experience.
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