text:
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Comics 1034-1036, and Special April Fool's Comic!
1034. Randall has observed that various internet communities have different demographics.
1035. In which an analogy is turned on its head to allegedly hilarious effect!
1036. Randall's closet luddite shines through.
1037? I think Randall is trying to say something philosophical here, but the only thing I care about is the comic about Wellesley students ends up portraying them as a mostly-male group, which seems like a pretty big oversight.
201 comments:
- AnonymousApril 1, 2012 at 9:40 PM
firstly, rob is fat.ReplyDelete
now the conversation can continue.Replies
Second post!Delete
Click here if you want to go to Hell.
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 1:17 PM
post below this if you are gayDelete
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 1:24 PM
posting to queue up behind 1:17Delete
captcha: allawa. "ALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAWALLAH!" said Mahmout as the Jew triggered the bomb he'd made him strap to his waist in return for the life of his family.
- AnonymousApril 1, 2012 at 10:05 PM
Look at the april fools one in a different browser, if you have multiple. There is a wealth of comics there for you to review, and some people won't know what you're talking about.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 1, 2012 at 10:06 PM
Rob is a pretty big oversight.ReplyDelete
No wait, I meant Rob is pretty big.Replies
You mean Rob is pretty.Delete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 10:45 AM
Pet, TY?
Mr T.
1037 is different for everyone depending on the data that's sent to the site (ip, referrer, etc.)ReplyDelete
It's a bunch of shitty comics in one.
Here is a big list.
- weaselsoupApril 1, 2012 at 11:30 PM
fancy that; i also spent the weekend despairing of all hope and staring blankly at the wall. but i do that every weekendReplyDeleteReplies
i think the correct phrasing there is 'goomh rob'Delete
- weaselsoupApril 2, 2012 at 3:02 AM
[suggestive comment]Delete
- weaselsoupApril 2, 2012 at 7:04 AM
that's less funny than xkcdDelete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 7:07 AM
George Carlin is less funny than xkcd?!Delete
- AndhairaApril 2, 2012 at 12:18 AM
One shitty comic or 50 even shittier comics, which is better and why? Discuss!!ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 1:37 AM
Like the plebeian I am, I'm using CLOSED SOURCE SOFTWARE to browse the internet, and so I'm not even going to bother viewing the slew of shitty comics that apparently exist beneath 1037.ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 9:35 AM
Call it proprietary software; FREEDOM MATTERS!Delete
GNU Forever!
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 9:43 AM
I'm fairly sure information whore Google, sponsor of Firefox and Chrome, are a greater threat to my freedom than 800lb Ballmer. Stallman is shortsighted.Delete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 1:47 AM
The great thing about the 1 April edition is that it proves Randall does have the time to draw about 50x the shit he normally draws - but he is just so lazy and intellectually fat. We contrast with the Carl/Rob capitalist owner/oppressed worker dual because while the same he doesn't sell t-shirts and xkcdsucks visitors use Adblock so can't make a business of it.ReplyDelete
- weaselsoupApril 2, 2012 at 2:51 AM
the idea of the april fools thing actually I thought was OK, even though all the comics are lame and some of them feature beret man, who i despise. however i read on the forum that it is actually the site admin guy that thought of the idea & did all the work. there's a thankless fucking task if ever there was one, being that guy. everything you do, all your hard work, turns into 'omg randall* is so clever i just wet myself over how clever he is'. munroe is clever in one way i spose, going on all the time about being a coder & what have you so everyone thinks it's him, when actually that other guy runs the whole thing.ReplyDelete
*ugh. stop calling him that. he's not your fucking friend, you idiots. he doesn't even arse himself to read the forums so your sycophancy is wasted
yes I am in a bad mood todayReplies
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 11:25 AM
Tsk, that's "fora", not "forums". http://xkcd.com/about/Delete
- weaselsoupApril 2, 2012 at 2:19 PM
ACTUALLY that page is inconsistent & has bothDelete
- SupervisorApril 4, 2012 at 6:01 PM
oh sure, now you say they can't call him randall, but you can call him randy all you want. no respectable reviews or even blogs that make "reviews" of movies, TV shows, books, games, art, or comics use first names to talk about the author, but the assholes on here treat the author like a fucking child.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 4, 2012 at 7:02 PM
i never call him randy. i call him mr munroe, or perhaps 'munroe'. because i agree with you. it's the thing that annoys me most about the forums tbh, this weird kind of personality cult that constantly talks about 'randall' and won't separate the artist from his work or even his website. this is (i guess) why people on here do the same; they take their cue from the fans.Delete
if you read the thread for the april fool one it stands out. 'every strip randall made'; 'randall got his history wrong' (guess it's a 'liberal art' & therefore unimportant); 'i hope he does this' etc. it's not everyone, but as you say, it's weird. when they say 'xkcd usually does this' or 'i enjoy the comic' you really notice how much more normal that sounds. i mean look. 'I just registered (but have been reading Randall's comics for years) so I could post a new one'. that's weird. you can't tell me that it wouldn't be more appropriate and normal to say ' just registered (but have been reading xkcd for years) so I could post a new one'.
in that way i sort of think it's legitimate for people here to copy this if they want. it's a comment on the weirdnesses of the fandom. maybe
maybe it's like this elsewhere. maybe qc fans bang on and on about 'jeph treats us to another absurd slice of genius'. i can't be arsed to go find out.
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 7:33 AM
I thought it was because "Randall" sounds like a surname. But then my English public school upbringing forces me to call everyone by their untitled surname as in, "Six of the best twice weekly for Munroe!"Delete
- Dicksmash McIroncockApril 5, 2012 at 7:38 AM
weaselsoup, you're further proof that this blog is incapable of attracting a female poster who isn't annoying.Delete
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 7:47 AM
Irreconcilable standards beget frustration begets verbosity.Delete
I don't understand how serving many comics is an April Fools joke.ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 4:33 AM
Also some people may be fooled into thinking that Umwelt means Intelligent Design is true because REALITY CHANGES ACCORDING TO YOUR PERCEPTION EVOLUTION IS ONLY A THEORY LOL when in fact that's not what Umwelt is saying at all.
I think the joke in the variable comics was supposed to be the confusion caused by everyone discussing "the latest XKCD" and getting into fights over what it was about and then being all like "let's go check it out" and it being different yet again... the joke was this chaos that he believed he was causing in his audience. So, randall is trolling... this time I feel like it was pretty well done and showed significant effort (on someone's part) and I'm all for Randall making the XKCD core audience feel like idiots so I think we can call it a rare win.ReplyDelete
I didn't think the comic was funny, but I still liked the concept. I think Randall can be pretty creative when he doesn't try to make jokes, and I thought it was a neat trick.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 12:52 PM
I didn't think any of the comics today were funny. but i loved the way that it changes depending on your browser, or your zoom, or what site you are coming from, it was very creative (i don't care who did it, Randall or the server admin, i still think its f'ing awesome). I think you have to admit, some of them were funny (the 4chan one, for example, made me giggle a bit). It was definitely something new, and fun for me, as i tryed to hunt down every single panel. I think these comics are less about the content, and more about discovering every hidden secret in the comics. sorta an easter egg huntReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 2:12 PM
In 1996 or so, I wrote my first cgi-bin script, and one of the first things I did was to change the response based on HTTP_REFERER and HTTP_USER_AGENT.Delete
Around five thousand two hundred days later, I can't fail to be unimpressed by a site which reacts to referer, browser type and window size.
I hope anyone who has read more than a chapter into any web design guide will feel similar.
I find it awesome how some people can press those keys on a piano keyboard and make sound come out. It's really fucking impressive.Delete
I find it awesome how some people can squeeze a nipple and make milk come out. It's really fucking impressive.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 4:19 AM
And there's the rub, Fernie: all Randall does is bash the keys. For this edition he's spent longer bashing them, and even discovered a pedal.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 12:22 PM
I can't not fail to never be impressed by a site that never fails to never be unimpressive.Delete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 2:15 PM
Hive full of dickwasps?ReplyDelete
...yeah alright, I chuckled.
Holy shit this is actually a lot of comics though, several dozen of the damn things. Has Randall just been stockpiling for April Fools for months now or what.Replies
- ShifraApril 2, 2012 at 3:19 PM
No, he just spent an hour instead of his usual 5 minutes.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 4, 2012 at 2:56 AM
just wanted to appreciate 'dickwasps'. very goodDelete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 3:19 PM
Given that most people view a comic once, on one browser, without zooming in and out, the whole point is lost on the casual viewer - contrast this with the best google doodles which practically beg to be played with and offer up their secrets.
Truly one for the back slapping forums, sadly.
I wont say the individual comics are bad, but that taken together this is not the smart winking joke about umwelt that it obviously thinks it is. It actually works better as a satire on religion - if you didn't get the comic you desire it's your fault for being in the wrong hemisphere/OS/browser/sect/not praying hard enough/processor architecture. The fact that the inner workings are hidden and obscure, that theories and explanations are debated by the faithful on the forums, only adds to the effect.
I think we all missed a chance to start making fake XKCD strips and posting on the forums "what do you mean none of you guys got these?" and then making them lose their shit trying to figure out how to get that one.ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 8:14 PM
... Raven puts us all to shame.Delete
Captcha: comicidal. Is that what Randall is?
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 9:00 PM
I had the same idea and actually thought of it on time to implement it, but at the time I really couldn't be fucked even trying to convince other people to do the work. Making a quick snarky comment at some dark corner of the internet is one thing, but doing extra stuff is something else, you know? Kind of a hassle, as I'm sure you can understand.Delete
- AnonymousApril 2, 2012 at 9:56 PM
All the comics suck, so really this is just shotgun 'humor' + javascript.ReplyDelete
The only clever bit on Randall's part is writing a bit of code --- or making his 'sysadmin' do it...
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 3:06 AM
I can't believe I clicked so many of those. It's probably because I'm in France and the France one was so dumb I had to figure out what was up (I'm also unemployed). I mean, the France one seems to have someone who's French in it but uses American slang? Has Randall ever met a foreigner? And are there Americans who know how to spell but not pronounce "touche"? Usually it's the other way around. Plus just saying "touche" like that isn't an expression in France and they don't get it (I've tried).ReplyDelete
The only one that was kind of funny was the boston one (0 if by land, 1 if by sea). An author with even an iota of self-editing would have just put that up and said "fuck it" to all the time put into the other comics.
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 3:34 AM
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 8:45 AM
Can I try?Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 8:48 AM
Nothing special.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 3, 2012 at 3:37 AM
i sort of like the lake diver serial killer one. it is silly enough to raise a smile if you don;t think about it for too long. although no reporter would choose 'lake diver killer' as a nickname for a serial killer because that is too literal and too cumbersome. it would be like the Bay Ripper or the Frogman Slayer or somethingReplyDelete
the one specially for me ie the uk one (which i didn't even bastard get, so all the scripts & that ain't that great) is meh. we know that it is a thing that we are far too influenced by the US. people have been saying that for quite some time now
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 4:45 AM
So am I the only one who noticed that randall spelled umlaut wrong?ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:22 PM
Yes. Yes you are.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:30 PM
What the eff are you talking about? Umwelt is a German word.Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 1:03 AM
11:30, do you mean umlaut? That's a German word but it's used in American too.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 7:07 AM
Umwelt comic doesn't really work. It's meant to be an illustration of the fact that we all live in different worlds because we all experience the world differently. Fair enough.ReplyDelete
But most of us inhabit a version of the world that is internally consistent and makes sense, unlike this comic, which on my browser has a title and alt-text that don't appear to relate to the image, and a person saying they found a snake and "forgot to stop". WTF? Who says that kind of thing in real life. Surely it would be more like: "I found a snake and it seems to be very long".
FFS Randall. April Fools' Day ain't an excuse for this nonsense. If you're gonna do something surreal, it could at least be surreal and clever, not just LOLRANDUMB.Replies
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 8:40 PM
That's not really what lolrandumb means.Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 6:06 AM
sez who?Delete
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 12:09 AM
The vast majority of people who use the term.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:12 AM
I can't say I blame Randall; April Fool's jokes are never funny, even when perpetrated by talented comedians.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 5:04 PM
I have fairly decent nails, but they tend to peel, split, bend, and break painfully on impact when neglected. If I get (or give myself) a manicure once a month or so, they grow like crazy and don't break like they did.ReplyDelete
I think it's really the buffing and filing that make the big difference. You can get a very cheap 3-sided buffer in the nail section of any drug store, plus get a good file and a strengthening clearcoat base (I like Sally Hanson teflon formula). Use a moisturizing nail polish remover, wash hands well, massage in oil or lotion, do your buffing and filing, and either wash hands again before clearcoat or let the oil/lotion stay on overnight if you can, then wash and paint the next day. You may want to go occasionally to a professional, because they do a very nice job of shaping the nail.
I have taken biotin in times of crisis. All I really noticed is that my nails broke less traumatically when they did break, but my hair certainly went nuts. It actually seems like dairy makes a difference for me, when I'm on a yogurt kick my nails seem stronger.Replies
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 7:50 PM
Jello (or any form of gelation) really works for me.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 10:51 PM
I'm 32 years of age and have recently started to bald. I wouldn't consider it a major problem, I mean I'm still youngish but old enough to have to expect my body to start doing some of this sort of stuff, except I've only gotten pussy a few times in my life. Twice with one girl and one time each with three others. Baldness is bound to severely impair my capacity to get the minimum amount of pussy that I'll be satisfied with having gotten in my lifetime, so I want to at least stave off the effects long enough to achieve my goals.Delete
Anyway. You say this biotin stuff had the side effect of making your hair go nuts. Do you think it will help with my problem? I'm not worried about my nails.
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:00 PM
If you want to get pussy, I'd suggest staying away from this site and getting a life. You can do it!Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:18 PM
Oh, I have plenty of nice strategies for getting pussy, don't you worry about that. I just don't want to rush and need to make sure my thinning crown doesn't make me start seeming like a loser.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:23 PM
Just don't tell them you read this site and you'll be fine.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 4, 2012 at 2:54 AM
sounds like your strategies aren't that nice? run us through some of them why don't youDelete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 1:34 PM
My strategy is to have a lot of money and to be vaguely handsome and in shape. It works with 90% of women. I haven't met a woman yet who wants a guy who is genuinely "nice", which explains something about the way the world is. Indeed, as I've aged and gone from well-educated freedom-loving hippie to arch-capitalist, the women have gone from disinterested to swooning.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 4, 2012 at 2:31 PM
all 4 of them? still, vaguely handsome is more than good enough for meDelete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 9:26 PM
It's all in attitude really. You have to be cool and not rush things, don't try to force it or she might get intimidated. Most women don't like feeling intimidated, but if everybody's happy you might get a chance. Don't worry, you'll work out your own style in time.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 5, 2012 at 1:50 AM
nah. i only ever fancy guys who are well out of my league. so when they act uninterested, i assume that's because they are uninterested.Delete
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 2:42 AM
Dude, you got issues. He didn't say anything about acting uninterested. If being forceful is the only interest you know you gotta sort yourself out before you run into trouble.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 5, 2012 at 2:46 AM
i am a girl. i get the sense that's less obvious than i thought it wasDelete
i'm talking from the point of view of the ladies this stuff is meant to attract
that said, obv i also have issues. just not the ones you think
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 3:43 AM
How should I know? Figured you for a fag.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 5, 2012 at 3:50 AM
yeah. i have to talk more about my titsDelete
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 7:22 AM
weaselsoup, you're kinda affirming 9:26BST. Women go for the stereotypical cool dude who acts to her as if he doesn't care, while he objectively tailors the way he behaves to getting that woman. This satisfies the base biological desire for women to go for the Best Man, who seemingly should be so teeming with women that he doesn't have to try very hard to get one.Delete
For example, you fancy Rob because Rob appears moderately literate yet completely passive toward others. Rob does not respond because he is fat and a faggot - but in the subconscious female brain that's translated as "in demand", making him seem all the hotter.
Of course, women have to be physically attractive and moderately smart too. The idea that smart guys go for bimbos is just a bit of misogyny by mediocre men and ugly women who can't face up to the fact that women can be both smart and pretty.
Incidentally, there are several Anon here.
- weaselsoupApril 5, 2012 at 7:50 AM
' while he objectively tailors the way he behaves to getting that woman. 'Delete
I wish. most of the time I think it's simpler than that - they act uninterested cos they are uninterested. 'he's just not that into you' speaks the truth. it's less about playing games than we like to think. we just tell ourselves this cos it's easier on our self-esteem to think 'oh it's just a strategy' than to accept that 'yeah, that guy simply doesn't fancy me however much i like him'.
here in the uk we are having a lot of fun at the minute with the whole samantha brick trolling 'controversy' which is all about accusing women of not liking attractive women because they are 'jealous'. which is nonsense, but we love discussing this kind of thing, and it distracts us from the real news, &c. anyway, as you say it's no secret that many guys prioritise appearance - so do lots of girls. but i think it's possible to wistfully envy the pretty ones whilst not being misogynistic at all.
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 8:29 AM
You misunderstand. The woman likes the stereotypical cool dude. It's very rare for a woman to go for anyone who actually chases desperately after her - though she will often lap up the attention.Delete
As to whether the guy is genuinely uninterested or just playing The Game, you have to compare and contrast his behaviour around others. The guy's friends probably have a good idea of whether the guy wants you or not. He may not even have noticed enough about you to judge either way- and perhaps you fear rejection so hang around in the background. Remember that to the man in demand there is no need to go after anyone: you have a selection of women who want you and just take them in turn as they ask for you. That forms part of The Game.
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 10:28 AM
Well, I have a foot fetish. So while you fags are arguing about how to get laid I'll be taking a stroll into town and celebrating how the spring weather brings ladies' feet into the open. And by celebrating I mean leering. With the aid of a cameraphone.Delete
Then I'll go home and masturbate furiously.
Total cost to my wallet: $0.
Total cost to my heart: $0.
Satisfaction of knowing I'm as free yesterday as I am today: priceless.
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 1:04 PM
I'm really shy so don't have anything to do with women I'm interested in because I'm deadly afraid of being rejected. Then I go home and talk to my friends about how I'm playing The Game.Delete
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 1:24 PM
I know women will reject me because of posts like weaselsoup's. All women only want guys "out of their league", and either:Delete
1. get chosen by one of those guys or
2. settle for someone else as their standards slowly drop.
Both are by chance. In the first case, the alphas have to choose at least some subset of available women. In the second case, well, it depends whether you're around at precisely the right time.
So it's not really worth chasing after any woman. You either become sufficiently amazing that you'll have an ever-changing but ever-present harem to select from, or you just wait a while until one comes along while she's having a standards shake-up.
tl;dr humans are all pretty much the same so anyone who is choosy is just deluding themselves out of unwarranted self-importance.
captcha: oketted. The documents were vetted and oketted.
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 2:01 PM
Anon, you're always out of SOMEBODY'S league. Your complaint implies that you refuse to consider anybody "below" your league for yourself, whatever that means when you're not talking about sets of people willing to consider you, which leaves you the author of your own misfortune.Delete
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 3:07 PM
No, no. The point is that, as weaselsoup shows, women initially look for people who they cannot have. If they knew they could have you, they would not want you. Unless, by small chance, they are picked out by one of these supermen - and there are so very few such men - they will only settle down once they've become disillusioned and given up. Who they then choose is fairly lolrandum.Delete
So it's certainly possible to run out and get a woman if you try hard enough, but only one of the latter sort. And they won't choose you because you are grrreat but because they feel they'll just have to settle for you.
- AnonymousApril 5, 2012 at 3:26 PM
This thread started out pretty good, but from 11:00 on it gets very bad. I wish I had been here to help guide things back at the start. With my help, it could have been great.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 9:03 PM
You waste your time on this sutes? Get a life, losers!!!!! Maybe you should kill yourself.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 9:07 PM
Is this site still going? What a f-ing loser you are!ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 12:14 AM
Is Anon 9:07, etc still going? What a f-ing loser you are!Delete
- Aquarians Love To F-April 4, 2012 at 5:09 AM
f-ing motherf-ers with their g-d- self-censorship.Delete
That's selfuckcensorship, in case you were wondering.
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 9:09 PM
Carl Wheeler is a loser!!ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 9:10 PM
I'm drunk, but tomorrow I'll be sober, and Carl Wheeler and the rest of you will still be losers!ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 10:30 PM
Yeah, but our livers will be pristine.Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 1:06 AM
You may be drunk, Sir, but I am a drunkard. And tomorrow I shall still be drunk, whereas you will have to face yourself sober.Delete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 9:42 PM
chris houlihan's roomReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:15 PM
Munro's worst comic is better than any of you losers could do!!ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 3, 2012 at 11:21 PM
SSHHH, don't tell them that, it might hurt there feelings.Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 12:13 AM
Jon Levi's worst post is better than anything you anon could do!!Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 12:40 AM
haha you obv. haven't encountered any of my many masterpieces. Lurk more, noob.Delete
My worst, eh?Delete
So. It has come to this.
Since when did 'personally I don't understand the appeal of the 'Maybe I'm the first person here to say it but I find 'Sustainable leopard cuddlefish (amirite)' really boring.' dot tumblr dot com' meme' become okay?
I don't think it's okay.
That is all.
But "Very soon, this blog is going to collapse into a rotting collection of 'chris houlihan's room,' 'parsimonious lens,' 'carnival night zone, act 2', 'ksufheriugi,' and 'Personally I don't understand the appeal of ...,' devoid of all other content. And we're all going to have 3:55 to thank for it.", devoid of narrative or context, is no more than shouting wordlessly into the void. It could just as easily be "chris houlihan's room", or "carnival night zone, act 2", or "parsimonious lens", or "ksufheriugi". DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKSDelete
I know this post won't stop people from posting "Very soon, this blog is going to collapse into a rotting collection of 'chris houlihan's room,' 'parsimonious lens,' 'carnival night zone YOU WILL DIE IN YOUR SLEEP TONIGHT
Sustainable, sustainable sustainable sustainable sustainable? Sustainable sustainable! Sustainable, sustainable sustainable sustainable sustainable. Sustainable, sustainable sustainable sustainable sustainable? Sustainable sustainable! Sustainable sustainable, sustainable sustainable sustainable. Sustainable, sustainable sustainable sustainable sustainable? leopard leopard! leopard leopard, leopard sustainable leopard leopard.
*sigh* lolrandumb
girlloo parsimonious lens katthatleopard
gcarnival night zone, act 2parsimonious lensirllookatthatleopard
girllookatthatlcarnival night zone, act 2eopard
*sigh*parsimonious lens
girll=lolrandumb=ookatthatleopardparsimonious lens=samefag
*sigh*parsimonious lenskatthatleopard
*sigh*carnival night zone, act 2
*sigh*carnival night zone, act 2
girllookatthatleopardparsimonious lens
Since when did "Plate 15: Female breast.
[[There is a drawing of a breast, with 'breast', 'areola', and 'nipple' labeled.]]
Plate 16: External female genitalia
[[There is a picture of external female genitalia. 'labia majora', 'labia minora', 'clitoris', 'urethral opening', and 'vagina' are labeled.]]
Voice #1: HEY!
Plate 17: External male genitaliaDelete
[[There is salt, ketchup, and mustard to one side.]]
Voice #2: SUSTAINABLE! Shit!
Voice #1: What the hell? You can't do that in here.
Voice #2: Megan, get off the table!
Voice #2: Grab the tripod!
Plate 18: Erect Penis
[[The picture appears to be at an angle.]]
Voice #1: We're calling the cops! LOLRANDUMB!
Voice #2: RUN!
Voice #1: TGI Friday's is a family establishment!" become okay?
I don't think it's okay.
If you post anonymously, the terrorists win.
My worst post had to be split up into four parts because Google kept deleting it. How... ORWELLIAN.
Jon Leopard's worst post part 1 was my favorite. After that they were just in it for the money.Delete
Don't be ridiculous. Part 3 is where he really gets into the flow of things. It's like Eliot met Joyce in a quirky Devonshire country pub, and then Jon turned up and pissed all over them.Delete
So hot.
that was beautiful. Jon you have the key to the blog now. my work here is doneDelete
Alright lets do this.Delete
JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNN mmmLEEEEVVVIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiii!!!
*logs in to xkcd forum*
At least I've got chicken.Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 2:56 AM
anon9:10, so you're telling us you're drunk on a Tuesday night in the middle of a workweek, and the fact that you're visiting this site tells us that you're probably drunk by yourself. And you're calling us losers?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 3:18 AM
This is my first comment ever on this site.ReplyDelete
Also, Rob is a grumpy loverly grump.
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 5:12 AM
Lots of butthurt cuddlefish here today, did we get linked on the forums or something?ReplyDeleteReplies
- weaselsoupApril 4, 2012 at 5:53 AM
oh yeah, here http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=47&t=31368&p=2948903&hilit=xkcdsucks#p2948903Delete
"Also, the "ugh my uterus" poll guy in General is clearly a migrant from xkcdsucks. They're currently embroiled in an attempt to claim that nobody ever says that, EVER (and if they do, it's still somehow not believable dialogue).
Guys, women never talk about their periods without lots of blushing and giggling and seven layers of euphemism and misdirection. SEND A MEMO."
This comment has been removed by the author.Delete
- That's what sheApril 4, 2012 at 10:39 AM
Uh, Rob, I respect your individuality and all that, but confessing to your love of elderly animal porn should probably be done anonymously. I suggest you delete that comment.Delete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 6:08 AM
I thought the fountain comic wasn't bad; like xkcd used to be in "the good old days".ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 7:48 AM
And the artwork is simply amazing. It's so beautiful the way the sky shades from deep blue to pale blue. The fountains are so lovingly rendered I swear I can almost feel the spray of water coming through my screen. The bold stroke of the water dripping off the feet in the last panel really speaks to me. I'm left feeling emotionally uplifted even while the character is literally being uplifted. Randall is an artistic genius.Delete
- weaselsoupApril 4, 2012 at 8:00 AM
wondering what will happen when the fountain switches off is also quite funDelete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 4:48 PM
I completely agree. And to anyone who claims that Randall's art is lazy: Imagine how long it must have taken to draw that sky. Every pixel is a slightly different color than the one before!
Sometimes it's the little details that take the most work.
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 6:53 AM
What the fucking hell is this new one supposed to be?ReplyDelete
And if jumped from the roof with an open umbrella I'd float to the ground gently. Implausible? Sorry I can't hear you from all the way down heeeeeeeeeeeeeee-ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 1:42 PM
This blog needs more posts like Sleaw's and less like Jon Levi's. I blame myself for creating half the memes he's using, though. So actually Jon Levi please continue.Delete
Also bla bla milk fountain.
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 8:15 PM
bullshit their my memes you filthy thiefDelete
- That's what sheApril 4, 2012 at 10:44 AM
Shit > 1038ReplyDelete
The only good thing i can say about 1038 is that, at least, it didn't try to be funny. Except the alt-text of course, but i've learned not to care about those a long time ago.ReplyDelete
- SupervisorApril 4, 2012 at 6:07 PM
I thought the Umwelt alt-text referred to how people from Cali/Boston perceive earthquakes/snow differently...ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 4, 2012 at 6:56 PM
chris houlihan's roomReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 2:04 AM
Wikipedia browse!ReplyDelete
Long word!
Educated female!
Female explaining matters!
Quirky take on computer science!
All the above notwithstanding, what really twists my nipples is - as usual - the fact that the humour isn't based on some clever observation or application of SCIENCE but formed by taking a few words from the Pander Theme and combining them into a randum punchline. Public key encryption is a secure alternative to a safeword in the same way that a padlock on a Fire Exit door is a good alternative to a push bar.Replies
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 2:24 AM
Oh, come off it. That's not a random punchline. It's a simple joke which logically proceeds from a standard format. Not all that bad for what it is really, though it's not clever or witty and is a little bit seedy.Delete
Unless you mean the alt-text, which isn't the punchline.
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 2:43 AM
The last paragraph expands on the penultimate paragraph, yes. You can tell because the first sentence only makes sense in that context and the second sentence is explicit about it.Delete
The alt text is typically and almost by definition an alt-ernate punchline.
But thanks for your analysis of my critique. It was really unhelpful.
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 5:00 AM
Since when was anything here supposed to be helpful?Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 5:43 AM
I wasn't expecting helpfulness. That's why I thanked him for living down to my expectations.Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 1:46 PM
Well maybe you should sound less sarcastic next time you 're genuinely thanking somebody. Sheesh.Delete
Okay, so today's comic was pretty bad again. Apparently, scientists suck at picking safewords because a) they're holed up in their labs for so long they forget normal human words and b) they're too stupid to realise the point is to have a short word. In other words, 'if we used elaborate scientific terms for everything, that would be inconvenient'. Yes, Randall, we know. That's why we don't. If you do this, shouldn't that be your problem instead of ours?ReplyDelete
Because I'm a huge idiot, I first thought this was just about using a long word instead of a short one, which could be applied in many other (more interesting?) situations, like an important special ops mission or in a safehouse during a raptor attack:
'Jesus, open the door, they're right behind!'
'Password, what's the password!'
'Oh, uh... ri- ribulosebi- ribulosebiphosphatecarboxylAAAAARGGGHGH!'
Then in my infinite wisdom I realised the word actually meant something and it added nothing because the joke was still the same: 'use a long word instead of a short one = inconvenient (and, most of the time, hilarious!)'.
Also, why is all the action happening offscreen? Why, instead of seeing the guys who are fighting/playing sports/whatever they're doing requiring a safeword, we literally get to look at two random bystanders who pick up a line of conversation from the scene the joke is about and make a stupid comment on it? They're not the joke - the guys offscreen are. This feels like an extremely lazy cop-out because if Randall had to draw two stick figures wrestling or whatever it would be impossible to tell they weren't just having nasty public sex. So instead we get this.
Someday I'll write a book where every scene just picks out a random person and follows him or her around, while everything interesting happens somewhere in the background, close enough for my character to occasionally look around and go 'huh' and wonder what that's all about, but never showing us what's really happening.
And it will be a work of ART.Replies
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 2:42 AM
"Also, why is all the action happening offscreen?"Delete
Seriously? Because that's how the joke is being set up: by having the reader wonder what the hell is going on. Some of you people really need to learn a thing or two about comedy before trying to criticise xkcd. You're bringing the tone down, and we've kept the tone simmering at a pretty low speed for quite some time.
Then again, considering that you act unaware that they're supposed to be partaking of S&M, maybe you're trying to trick fools like me into arguing with you? Am I your stooge?
Sorry dude, but this joke wasn't going to be funny no matter how it was set up. And it would have worked just as well (meaning not at all) by simply showing the situation - we would not figure out the word was a safeword until the other person responds by 'sorry' or letting go (until then, it seems random gibberish, just like this). As it is, the revelation 'oh, he wasn't just yelling a random word but using it as a safeword' is pretty damn weak already - somehow trying to make that more surprising by not showing us anything only makes the payoff even less rewarding.Delete
Also, who says it's S&M? The comic is ambiguous, and though your mind might stray into the gutter right away, safewords are also used in many types of sport to prevent injury. I went with that option because it seemed less, I don't know, retarded? Even though both activities seem to make no sense whatsoever since we're apparently in a... living room? Public library? I have no clue where we are (hint: the art is meaningless), but I think that two people having hot bondage sex right over there is still a bit more disturbing than two people sparring. Honestly - even if you're right, that's really just going to make matters worse, isn't it?
Still, thanks for trying to tell me this joke is still somehow funny, even if it's lame as hell. I'll be sure to ask next time before deciding whether to laugh or not.
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 4:25 AM
I disagree that the concept of a 'safe word' applies across all fields equally, mostly because the reasoning is totally different.Delete
The reason you have a particular (often unique) safeword for S&M is because most S&M is a form of role play and screaming out 'stop' / calling out for help etc. may well be part of the performance. A unique, unusual safeword (one that would not generally come up in said situation) is thus necessary to break the role play bubble if things end up going too far.
These same considerations generally doesn't apply to sports, unless we're talking about some sort of LARP fencing where people may not want to break character or something. Hence you wouldn't expect to see people coming up with unusual safewords before, say, a bout of boxing. There would be standardised safe words that everyone in the sport knows and is ready for. This fact very much matters to the joke, as the principle concept would have no reason to apply to anything much other than S&M.
I like your post because it's nice and reasonable, but I can't entirely agree - here, let me be a bastard and quote wikipedia:Delete
'In professional competition, saying "stop" or "help" does not indicate surrender and the opponent may continue combat.'
It's okay for me to reference Wikipedia because I know that's what Randall does, and it's his usage we're talking about. Anyway, that's where I got the idea from that it might as well apply to sports, though I'm starting to fear it may indeed be an S&M joke - at any rate, I think it's ambiguous enough that you can envision either option if you really want to.
I just envisioned how this comic would have worked much better. One picture, two figures engaged in S&M, one of them clearly choking to death and going 'Ribulose... kggh... biphosphate... gggghhh... carbo... carboxylase... oxy... gggghhhh...' and then a single caption below, 'Chemists use the worst safewords'.Delete
Same crappy joke, but better executed. Of course it would still be better to have a different joke altogether, but that would be cheating.
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 5:22 AM
Sleaw, I wasn't trying to convince you that the comic is funny. That's subjective and nobody cares whether you find it so or not. I don't necessarily have a high opinion of the humour myself. I was just pointing out that you don't know what you're talking about.Delete
Fair enough - most of the time I don't.Delete
- That's what sheApril 6, 2012 at 6:18 AM
This is xkcd we're talking about. They're having bondage sex. This is not up for debate.Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 8:20 AM
Exactly. How many times has Randall even acknowledged the existence of sports? The only thing I can think of that comes close is 757 where he talks about vuvuzelas in the alt-text (after the World Cup brought them into American consciousness). On the other hand, xkcd is chock full of creepily inappropriate sex. This is sex, not sports.Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 9:16 AM
It's great that there's a site like this where the trolls can all talk to each other. Isn't the internet grand?Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 4:07 PM
You don't need the internet for that. What's wrong with good old fashioned political involvement?Delete
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 1:35 PM
Also if you Google "safe word" it's a very long time before you come across anything about sports. Maybe that's just Google's insidious personalised searches at work, though.Delete
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 2:23 PM
Your search - "safe word" - did not match any documents.Delete
Serves me right for turning SafeSearch off.
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 2:52 AM
@2:42BST: We get it, it's Easter Weekend and you're lonely and angry, but no need to get your panties in a bunch and nip at the heels of people here. Go to a porn site, have a good tommy tank, then come back feeling less apopleptic. Express your remaining frustration with a good anti-Randall rant.ReplyDeleteReplies
I was under the impression it was a Sherman rather than a tommy.Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 1:49 PM
What does that even mean? The only thing that comes to mind is Sherman tanks and tommy guns but that makes no sense! Is this some of that incomprehensible authentic rhyming slang, you zany authentic Londoner?Delete
Ann is as cockney as a sloane ranger can be.Delete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 4:55 AM
It should be biologists, not chemists.ReplyDelete
Happy Choccy Choc Fat Fat Weekend!Replies
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 8:24 AM
It could be biochemists, but yeah, that's not really the same thing as chemists. There are plenty of non-biochemicals with long names he could have chosen instead (and that don't have handy three syllable nicknames) if he wanted it to be about chemists. I guess all those "less pure" fields are the same in Randall's mind.Delete
- Dicksmash McIroncockApril 6, 2012 at 8:43 AM
Does anyone use Sothink SWF Quicker 5.4? Their program kind of sucks so it's not worth buying, but I would like to finish my project, so I need a registration code. Google's not much help.ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 9:19 AM
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 4:20 PM
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 1:51 PM
Hey, looks like the timestamps have gone back to universally sticking to just the one zone. That's pretty great, I was a bit worried there for a while.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 6, 2012 at 3:11 PM
The Wellesley students are all radical feminists who shave their heads half-way through the comic.ReplyDeleteReplies
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 3:37 AM
Come now, you know you would. If only because it's so wrong.Delete
Randy won. He finally succeded in making his comics so awful that saying anything bad about them would just be stating the obvious.ReplyDelete
I want for proof that even this blog is unable to hate him so much as just pity him. And i'm not talking about Rob, we all know he is in fact Randy, i mean the comments. Even the chris houlihan's room, leopard, and girlookatthatbodydottumblrdotcom have lost their strength. The angry rants do not get as much attention as they once did either.
Though we should never stop fighting the good fight. Sinning by silence and all that (heya to all of you Castle lovers out there).
We should never stop pointing out how douchy and how much of a hack Randy truly is, that he only has 3 "jokes" (randwiki, randumb, and randscienceshit), and how much his fucking fanboys should all suffer eternal hell for sucking up to him and inflating his oversized ego even further.
So come on people, let's bring on the hate, the ranting, and all other things justly diserved by Randy, who shall from now on be known as Biggest Douche Alive, or King of the Hacks.Replies
You have fought gallantly. Worthy of recognition in the history archives of the Jedi Order. Now it is finished.Delete
Randall once shot a man in Reno, because he canceled Firefly.Delete
And then he wrote a comic about it.
What a douche.
On a more serious note, xkcd is dangerously overrated as a webcomic. It steals attention away from the good comics. It sucks. But does that make Randall Munroe a douche?
Call me contrary, but I don't really think it's Randall's fault. He started off doing something that he's good at (doodling in his notebook), and had no idea it would get so successful. He accidentally created the most overrated webcomic of all time, and achieved fame beyond his dreams. He created a monster, and cannot stop feeding it. But in the end he's just like Frankenstein; the accidental creator of a monster, not the monster himself.
We shouldn't hate a man for his actions. We should hate his actions - hate on the comic as much as we like. But not the man himself. Except for the lulz.
- weaselsoupApril 7, 2012 at 1:32 PM
I love Castle. it's so romantic!Delete
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 1:33 PM
Read Frankenstein again. He may not physically be a monster, but he's no angel. To some extent, his creation's behaviour stems from his own treatment of his creation, who in some respect proves, perhaps, a reflection of the creator's flaws.Delete
We know Randall's a douche because of all those comics he writes about how great it is to be a douche, both drawing these ideas from a douchey mind and encouraging his slavish audience to typify this douchiness. What type of a person thinks it's great to say something annoying and always say "girllookatthatbody" whenever the other person sighs? Not the type of person whose primary function isn't cleaning out vaginas, that's for sure.
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 2:45 PM
> We shouldn't hate a man for his actions. We should hate his actionsDelete
A thousand times no!
The same sort of logic leads to hating the sky for being blue. Civilisations have fallen because they stopped hating people and started hating things. That's where we find ourselves right now: every human must be accepted, no matter how villainous and harmful, because "it's in his nature". Ballocks!
We can properly hate only the man himself, and we hate him because of his choices. We hate him because he has the opportunity to do something better but he chooses not to. We swell up a storm of annoyance and seethe with outrage that such a man should share the world. Our displeasure and distemper are not only justified but necessary.
For when we meet a man like Randall, the antithesis of all that may be pleasant about a human, we can taste only bile and offer only acrimony. Workers of equity, unite!
To play devils advocate here, I'd say that Randall's intentions are good. No really, they are. The comics you refer to are the ones where he's just joking around about being a douche. But when he has something to say, it comes from the bottom of the heart. I'd cite the Choices series as a prime example. His message is a simple one, to get out there and enjoy life.Delete
And yes, sometimes that message is watered down with a sense of superiority, or white-knighting, or shit like this. But that's because of the format Randall has locked himself into, where he has to say something three times a week, whether he feels inspired or not.
The monster is controlling the creator, not the other way round.
Anon 2:45, if you must hate another human, then you must question his or her motives, why he or she did what they did. You'll find most people have their reasons, no matter how bizarre they are. And sometimes it's harder to understand them when people hide their true motives, because they're scared.Delete
Then ask yourself if you are better than that person, and don't lie to yourself. You have your own faults, as do I. If you can admit your own faults and tell yourself that you are better than that person, and if you know that their motives mean nothing to you, then hate away.
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 3:30 PM
> if you must hate another human, then you must question his or her motivesDelete
Hitler's vision was of perfectly formed humans working together in a perfectly moulded world. That's nice except for everything which has to be done to achieve it. As for motives, I say fuck 'em. Anyone can lie to everyone including themselves about their motives. Ask instead: what's the man actually choosing to do?
> ask yourself if you are better than that person
This is the cuddlefish argument: "you can't criticise xkcd unless you could draw a better comic".
> If you can admit your own faults
There is only one proper way to admit a fault: to try to fix it.
Thanks for your response though. Anything to distract me from a law essay.
What I'm trying to say is: 'Hate on someone if they're evil. Otherwise hate on their actions.' The problem is that there is no definition of absolute evil. Until we can find one, I propose an intermediate solution: if TVTropes would call them a Complete Monster then it's okay to hate on them.Delete
- AnonymousApril 7, 2012 at 5:17 PM
There's a big difference between criticising and hating.Delete
Sometimes faults are not worth the time and effort to fix, especially when you could doing something worthwhile. Sometimes you have to accept that you can't reverse sweep, and just work on your doosra instead.
Motives are useful when trying to determine what someone will do next, and whether they will do it again. You do not need to rely on what someone says are their motives either.
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 1:34 AM
> There's a big difference between criticising and hating.Delete
Yes. We criticise the act and hate the human who had the choice not to act that way.
> Sometimes faults are not worth the time and effort to fix
I can list a million things which I don't do precisely as I would like, from poaching an egg to flapping my arms to fly, but which would take too much effort to change. Where do I draw the line and stop regarding all these things as faults? Better to think of my condition as human and limit the "fault" label to those things I should get to changing for the better.
> Motives are useful when trying to determine what someone will do next
Yes, "motive" as a term to describe behaviour prediction is fine - but note that this is different from "motive" as a term to describe why a person thinks or claims he does what he does. The first is as studying a computer program; the latter is philosophistry and has no place in deciding whether to hate someone.
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 7:08 AM
1) I should elucidate - I meant "you can't criticise xkcd unless you could draw a better comic" is different from "you can't hate Randy unless you refrain from engaging in activities that are comparable", which is the point Jon is making, I think.Delete
2) My cricket example was meant to make clear a particular dilemma - one where there are two (or more) clear faults, but working on one to the exclusion of the other is far more beneficial. Panesar could work on his reverse sweep all he wants, but he is going to stay bottom of the batting order. If he could get his doosra working properly (or if he learned to bloody catch), however, he would be a more effective cricketer. Our time is limited, and we sometimes have to live with a fault that we are simply not good enough to fix.
3) Prediction is relevant to hating. Do you hate someone for a one-off aberration as much as you hate someone who shows a compulsion and desire to commit the act again?
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 7:39 AM
1) They're both ad hominem. X's status does not determine whether X should hate or criticise Y - Y's status does.Delete
2) The fault is the process of not doing what you can do. If you have two things A and B which you might be able to improve, but you cannot improve both, then there is only fault if you fix neither. Once you have identified A as more important and start fixing it, there is no fault in B - it just is. A fault is subjective to the individual's capabilities. While this may take some time to grasp, it is the only way not to end up concluding that every way in which you are not omnipotent is a fault.
3) No. You hate him while he repeatedly commits the act and until he starts acting differently. "Compulsion and desire" are wishy washy and can barely be measured, let alone used as yardsticks for hatred.
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 8:49 AM
lol ethicsDelete
moooooooooooooooooooooooooooom theyre talking social sciiiiiiiiiiiences
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 1:52 PM
1) The point was that if you hate Randy, and you engage in comparable activities, you should also hate yourself. If you don't, then you should readjusting something, possibly your hatred of Randy.Delete
2) A fault is a fault whether you can do something about it or not. It may not help your self-esteem, but that is the way it is. Panesar is a terrible batsmen and fielder, and that is a factor when selection comes around. If he can't improve a great deal in these, then it is a worse fault.
3) I've been inspired to change my mind on this. You can't decide to truly hate someone, it is a reaction that bypasses any conscious thought. I don't hate Randy, but I fucking despise some of his fans. Especially that radtea fucker in the forums...
I'm just posting to see if the ReCaptcha works. Don't mind me.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 1:40 AM
chris houlihan's roomReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 8, 2012 at 1:20 PM
randall munroe's comicReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 9, 2012 at 4:33 AM
Maybe it's because I'm fascinated by abyssal depths but I like this new chart. Also the "THE ABYSS (it's rude to stare)" thing was pretty funny.ReplyDelete
New comic looks nice! He put effort into it, which is good. There's some small jokes, but they're not the focus of the comic. I think you guys like to mention a certain illustrated picto-blog from time to time (read: in every comment ever)? This might be another example of something that would fit in there.ReplyDelete
Well, 1040 wasn't too bad, not really funny, but fun to read anyway. Though using black writing on light-to-deep brown background may not have been the best idea.ReplyDelete
I didn't really get the point of Marianas trench and Mauna Key things though, what are we supposed to see ?
- AnonymousApril 9, 2012 at 8:17 AM
Good, another poster.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 9, 2012 at 8:21 AM
My gf studies geology and I'm sure I recall a diagram just like this in one of her textbooks.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 9, 2012 at 8:26 AM
Where's the hate?ReplyDelete
- That's what sheApril 9, 2012 at 11:03 AM
Another fucking graph comic that takes all day to read. Well, I'm not gonna read it, so there.ReplyDelete
RANDALL MUNROE HAS OUTDONE HIMSELF AGAIN. BOW DOWN FOOLISH MORTALS BEFORE THE POWER OF VISUAL PRESENTATIONS OF DATA.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousApril 9, 2012 at 2:09 PM
hey everyone look at this massive toolReplyDelete


text:
Today at the Television Critics Association Press Tour, PBS president Paula Kerger announced that the first-ever autobiographical documentary of physicist Stephen Hawking, called A BRIEF HISTORY OF MINE (w.t.), is slated to air in 2013. The program gives viewers rare insight into Hawking's life, past and present, aided by a stellar cast of A-list contributors and Hawking fans, including astronaut Edwin Eugene "Buzz" Aldrin, Jr., actors Jim Carrey and Benedict Cumberbatch, mathematical physicist Sir Roger Penrose and entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson.
Full article:
http://www.pbs.org/about/news/archive/2 ... g-release/

subset: commoncrawl


text:
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Enter your email address to download the FREE 70 page PDF. You'll also receive our landscaping newsletter filled with helpful landscaping tips and design ideas.
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© 2019 Landscaping Ideas Online


text:
Two things in life are certain: rebirth and taxes.
That, at least, is according to the Dalai Lama, who spoke at a conservative think tank in Washington, D.C., on Thursday about the spirituality of capitalism.
The American Enterprise Institute hosted the Tibetan spiritual leader, who melded the ideas of free will and free enterprises in a wide-ranging, three-hour long live streamed and live blogged event.
"The very purpose is to derive to seek enlightenment. Happy community, happy family, happy nation. Then happy world. We are far from the world. Where do we start? From the government? No. From the UN? No. From individuals," AEI.org's managing editor Sharon Kehnemui quoted him as saying.
The Dalai Lama drew on Buddhist text to emphasize personal responsibility, a key sticking point for free-market economists: "Buddha emphasized you can not rely on prayer. You must rely on your actions. Buddha cannot give you what you want, you are your own master."
He also called for "a century of peace" and a focus on connecting east and west to build economic, political and spiritual stability.
The American Enterprise Institute seems to be living by those words. AEI's president and vice president traveled to Tibet to meet with the Dalai Lama last year.
Perhaps they are hoping the Dalai Lama can lend some wisdom for libertarians whose idea of a free enterprise system is "under immense strain," according to the AEI.
"We must stop considering free enterprise purely in terms of economic gain and wealth creation and begin considering it in terms of human fulfillment," the institute wrote on its website.
After speaking in Washington, the Dalai Lama will travel across the country to somewhere decidedly less conservative: San Francisco.


text:
Boerum Hill is a relatively small neighborhood, flanked by Schermerhorn Street to the north, Fourth Avenue to the east, Court Street to its west, and Degraw Street to the south. The size of the neighborhood allows residents and visitors a comforting feeling of familiarity. New projects and...
Explore Boerum Hill
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text:
"Hail East and West, for whom both we fight and from both we are fought!"
— St. Gregory the Theologian
In 2011, I published "Orthodoxy and the Roman Papacy: Ut Unum Sint and the Prospects of East-West Unity" (University of Notre Dame Press, $38). There I tackled what serious observers describe as the one final substantial hurdle to unity between the Orthodox and Catholic Church: the role of the pope. The picture on the front cover features a beaming Pope Benedict XVI and beaming Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew, arms united upward as though in victory salute at the latter's church in Constantinople during a visit in 2006.
Now, this month, the imagery will soon be of Pope Francis and Bartholomew making their way to the Holy Land for another encounter. Though they have already met — Bartholomew made history by being the first patriarch from Constantinople to attend a papal inauguration last year — the encounter this year is a celebration of the 50th anniversary of Pope Paul VI and Patriarch Athenagoras meeting in Jerusalem in 1964. That gathering was the beginning of what has often been called the "dialogue of love" between the Eastern and Western churches after more than 900 years of estrangement.
After 50 years of this dialogue, where are we? How has the relationship changed over time, and what roles have the last several popes played in bringing Catholics and Orthodox closer? And what remains for us to finally achieve unity?
If you pick up many standard textbook histories of East-West relations and subsequent division, you normally get confronted very quickly with the year 1054, which is very often described as the Great Schism between East and West. But history is messy. It is not as if everything was wonderful until one day in July 1054 when catastrophe struck and Cardinal Humbert and Patriarch Cerularius decided to tear the Church apart. Indeed, things already began to fall apart after the Council of Chalcedon in 451 when, in a Christological dispute that today seems largely due to linguistic misunderstanding, the Churches of Armenia, Syria and Egypt parted company from the rest of the Church and remain divided from us still today, though the reasons for that remain hard to fathom after decades of dialogue and signed agreements.
Both before and after Chalcedon, Christians in the first millennium were conflicted and divided with some regularity — an important fact to underscore against those who romanticize the "first millennium" as a golden age of harmony. Many of these divisions, especially between the fourth and eighth centuries, were over questions of Christology (and intrinsically related questions such as Mariology and iconology). But as time went on, divisions erupted for other, much more mundane reasons. The deeper we get into the first millennium, the more we find Christians growing apart in ways that differing language, geography and culture exacerbated.
With the collapse of the Roman Empire in the West by the late fifth century, we see even greater linguistic division and cultural isolation both within the Western Church and vis-a-vis the East. With the rise of Islam in the East in the early seventh century, we see similar challenges facing the Christian East; and soon these external pressures and internal challenges affect both East and West to such an extent as to leave little opportunity to talk to or learn from each other, which was itself made more difficult by the loss of Greek as a common language in the West and the loss of Latin speakers in the East. In sum, all these pressures take their toll on the Church, and she rather staggers toward the end of the first millennium with relations between East and West having been rather severely strained and not infrequently broken for a time (as in, e.g., the Photian schism of 863-67), patched up for a time, broken again and patched up again.
Thus when we get to the events of 1054, nobody then or for centuries after conceived of them as being completely, permanently and universally "church-dividing." They seemed, rather, simply to be yet another case of a temporary squabble and a temporary break in communion soon to be patched up once more. Neither side saw 1054 as the creation of a "Roman Catholic West" and an "Eastern Orthodox East," which is how it is sometimes portrayed. Neither side thought that their excommunication of the other was anything other than very localized and short-term. Indeed, there is well-known evidence that Catholics and Orthodox (as we would say today) continued to commemorate each other liturgically and to give and receive the Eucharist down through the 11th-14th centuries and in some places (the Greek Islands, and later the Soviet Union — for different reasons — and Syria even today) for many centuries after that.
What is generally thought to have sealed the split — and certainly poisoned relations for centuries afterward — was the sack of Constantinople in 1204 during the Fourth Crusade. The short version is that many Latin Christians behaved in a beastly fashion in the churches of Constantinople in 1204, scandalizing Eastern Christians for centuries after. Pope St. John Paul II apologized for these actions in Athens in 2001. (Orthodox outrage over this event overlooks the fact that the Latin Catholics in Constantinople had been brutally massacred in a pogrom in the city by the Orthodox in 1182, a fact long known to historians but never officially acknowledged by any Orthodox sources. Thus do we see the messiness of history and realize that we all have much to confess.)
After the Fourth Crusade, and with the empire in the East on the verge of final collapse at the hands of Islam in the early 15th century, East and West met in Italy — first in Ferrara and later Florence at the last council of union ever to meet. Issues were discussed, terms agreed upon, and everyone went home thinking the divisions in the Church had been patched up. But the bishops no sooner got home than the people, particularly in the East, revolted, refusing to accept the union of East and West, and the whole thing collapsed. After this, the Catholic Church changed tactics, and instead of working for comprehensive unity with all of Orthodoxy, began, after the 1590s, to enter into unions with individual Orthodox churches in places such as what we today call Ukraine and Romania. These proved controversial at the time and have remained so today, with Eastern Catholics often viewed suspiciously by both Catholics (as being insufficiently Roman) and Orthodox (as being insufficiently Orthodox and, indeed, traitors to Orthodoxy).
I mention all this history because I have become utterly convinced — the more so with each passing year — of the wisdom of the late Pope John Paul II who, almost from the first moments of his pontificate in 1978, began to use an inspired phrase: the "healing of memories." For many of us today, we do not know the history of Christian division in objective detail, but we have grown up with "memories" of a division that shape our identity today, often unconsciously and unwittingly. This is what I call identity by negation: He is Roman Catholic, which means he is not Orthodox; she is Greek Orthodox, which means she is not Southern Baptist. In other words, I am what you are not, and if we are honest, most of us rather prefer it this way. Only if you become what I am will the problem of Christian division be solved. This is what is called the "ecumenism of return."
That model was gradually abandoned by the Catholic Church starting at Vatican II, and it was definitively repudiated by Pope Benedict XVI in August 2005. At the end of Vatican II, Pope Paul VI and Ecumenical Patriarch Athenagoras solemnly and jointly lifted the excommunications pronounced in 1054 and sought to "remove both from memory and from the midst of the Church." They recognized in December 1965 that the way forward was not by return to a mythical past, or to a "mother church" from which contumacious children had strayed. Over the last half-century we have come to see that the way to solve Christian division does not consist in all Presbyterians becoming Greek Orthodox, or all Russian Orthodox becoming Roman Catholics. It requires all of us to convert ever more deeply to Christ and to find our unity in him who is our way, truth and life.
Until and unless we can let go of such divided identities in some form and recognize that we are all Christians, we will not make much progress toward unity. The challenge today is not only to heal memories of our past — which requires mutual confession of fault and mutual forgiveness — but also to begin building a new identity of a united future. That is a far taller order than many realize, and it must begin with a basic question: Do we desire unity? Do we want it? Do we see it as a priority? And are we willing to fight our own selfishness and sinfulness to achieve it?
Pope John Paul II clearly wanted unity and was clearly willing to fight for it. He published an unprecedented agreement in 1994 with the head of the Assyrian Church of the East over Christological disputes going back to Chalcedon in the fourth century. And in 2001, with that same church, he found a way for Chaldean Catholics (primarily in Iraq, many of them killed or driven out since the 2003 war) to share the Eucharist with the Assyrians through a recognition of the latter's eucharistic liturgy in an unprecedentedly generous understanding of some complicated issues. But without doubt the pope's 1995 encyclical Ut Unum Sint ("That They May be One") remains the most revolutionary such document of the 20th century, challenging all Christians, but especially Catholics, to find fresh ways of thinking and acting that would allow for Christian unity.
His yearning for unity and willingness to spare no effort in seeking it out was palpable, but nearly 20 years later we still have not lived up to the challenges he laid out for us, as Pope Francis explicitly recognized in Evangelii Gaudium ("The Joy of the Gospel") when he flatly said of John Paul's request "we have made little progress in this regard" (No. 32).
John Paul's desire for unity was thwarted by events: The mid-1990s were not kind to Orthodox-Catholic relations when the Soviet Union collapsed and the previously suppressed Eastern Catholic Churches emerged from the underground. Eastern Catholic Churches in Ukraine and Romania had been forcibly incorporated into their Orthodox counterparts by the communists after the Second World War. When they emerged with the collapse of communism, some Orthodox were both furious and embarrassed that their record of collusion and suppression was not only unsuccessful but was now coming to light alongside these previously underground and illegal Catholic churches.
Some Orthodox, chiefly the Russians, demanded that Rome herself now suppress these newly emergent churches, and when Rome declined this fatuous offer, many Orthodox in turn petulantly insisted on a halt to ecumenical dialogue. It continued on, albeit amidst much tension, and in 1993 in Balamand, Lebanon, both sides agreed that the method of signing unions with individual Orthodox churches must never again happen, and instead only corporate reunion, between all of Catholicism and all of Orthodoxy, would be the acceptable way forward.
But by Pope John Paul's death in 2005, any remaining unpleasantness from the 1990s had begun to wane, and Orthodox-Catholic relations began to warm again. In 2007, the official international Orthodox-Catholic dialogue produced a landmark statement, the so-called Ravenna document, which discussed the papacy, and ecclesial structures generally, in a new and frank way. Those discussions are continuing today, although as recently as December 2013, fresh tensions over this document emerged internally in Orthodoxy, with the Russian Church diverging from all the other Orthodox churches on the question of primacy.
Progress continued under Pope Benedict XVI, who had, in various comments over the years (most notably a famous lecture in Graz in 1976) made what seemed extraordinarily generous comments about the East and about Catholic rapprochement with her. But then early in his pontificate, he made a decision that caused little short of panic among some Orthodox when he deleted the title "Patriarch of the West" from the Annuario Pontificio — the annual directory of the Holy See. This was badly handled and poorly explained and needlessly inflamed Orthodox anxiety.
I argued, based on things Benedict had written in the 1990s and as late as 2002, that this was in fact a very good sign: He was taking the first steps, I thought hopefully, toward the creation of robust regional patriarchates in the Latin Church, and the first step was clarifying what is in fact a very vague title (what does "of the West" mean today?). But the decision languished after it was announced in March 2006 and was never followed up with what I assumed to be a timetable for further action. A lot of Orthodox feared this was some kind of retrenchment or renewed Roman centralization, and though those fears proved to be unfounded, so too did the hopes of those of us expecting ecclesiastical re-organization.
Be that as it may, Benedict did journey to Constantinople in 2006 for a very successful visit with the Ecumenical Patriarch. In addition, the 2007 decision of Benedict, in Summorum Pontificum regarding the extraordinary form of the Roman Rite (sometimes inaccurately called the "Latin Mass" or "Tridentine Rite"), was welcomed by some Orthodox, especially the Russians, as an encouraging sign that Rome was again serious about liturgical beauty and reverence and about recovering a vital part of her tradition.
The biggest change Benedict wrought to our understanding of the papacy came through resigning the office. This gesture was a wonderful and welcome "demythologizing" of the "personality cult" surrounding the modern papacy. Even before John Paul II died, Benedict — even before he became pope — had made clear his distinct unease with how much focus was fixed on the pope and how unhealthy this could be for the Church — a concern Orthodoxy has shared for centuries.
That resignation paved the way, of course, for the election of Pope Francis, and I was struck by this: In his first few words from the loggia in Rome that evening, he invoked some of the oldest words ever used to describe his new office. The Church of Rome, he said, is the one "which presides in charity over all the Churches," a phrase of Ignatius of Antioch, who died a martyr somewhere around the turn of the second century. Ignatius, of course, had a vastly different understanding of Roman primacy than many hold today. What view does Francis himself hold? In some ways, the signs indicate a very restrained understanding of the papacy; but other signs suggest (with considerable irony) he is not at all averse to using the power of his office to force through possible changes such as a considerable devolution of powers to bishops around the world. We need to wait a bit to get a fuller understanding, and to wait, moreover, the report from his council of eight cardinals on structural changes in the Church.
Where are we today, and were might we be going? As pope and patriarch gather in Jerusalem to look back on 50 years — and look forward to the next 50 — what items remain to be resolved? Clearly, the papacy continues to be discussed, and indeed for some time now has been the dominant issue on the agenda of the official international Orthodox-Catholic dialogue. How can the pope be a minister of unity for the whole Church without micromanaging the Orthodox churches? That, in a nutshell, is the challenge, and it's a considerable, but by no means insurmountable, challenge.
What other issues remain? The answer depends on whom you ask. For most Catholics, unity could happen tomorrow if the question of the papacy were sorted out — there really are almost no other objections or issues. I mean no triumphalism or sanctimony whatsoever when I say that many, likely most, Catholics would welcome unity immediately and, to the extent they cared about it at all, would be happy to have the issue settled.
But Orthodoxy is not nearly so settled on the question. Some would warmly welcome unity, but others have been vocal for some time in expressing hostility to unity with Catholics in the most virulent terms and denouncing their own bishops for any dialogue with Catholics. In witness of this very mixed situation, consider two recent events in the news: In Worcester, Massachusetts, on Easter Monday this year, the local Roman Catholic bishop was invited by the local Greek Orthodox bishop to the latter's cathedral for a celebration of Easter, which was the same this year on both Eastern and Western calendars. Bishop Robert McManus was warmly welcomed by Metropolitan Methodios of Boston. The two have cooperated in the past on joint Catholic-Orthodox events and pilgrimages and have very cordial relations.
But only days earlier, during Holy Week, two other Greek Orthodox bishops, this time in Greece itself, wrote an 89-page harangue to "His Excellency, Francis, Head of State of the Vatican City," thus refusing even such basic courtesies as using the proper titles for addressees of one's correspondence — they refused to call Francis "pope" or even "bishop." But that was a mere trifle compared to the contents of this comically absurd letter, a real omnium gatherum of fantasies, conspiracies, and other rubbish about Masons, Catholics as "heretics," and popes as demonic. Then, in a final flourish, the bishops proffered a vile anti-Semitic screed that accused the Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI of cozying up to the "satanic" Jews. It is, of course, impossible to take this pompous and puerile document seriously, though it is a salutary reminder once again of the importance of the healing of memories, and of the necessity of moving gradually toward unity lest we re-enact the fiasco of Florence's failure.
It's obvious that some Orthodox are not willing to move quickly — if at all — toward unity with Catholics, and many Orthodox would first require some reassurances, if not bold action, on several issues, beginning perhaps with the filioque, the clause in the Nicene Creed that proclaims the Holy Spirit "proceeds from the Father and the Son." Orthodox and Catholic scholars for 20 years now have discussed this issue and agreed that it is not church-dividing, but some Orthodox still feel that the Church in the West lacked the authority to unilaterally alter a creed that was decided upon by the consensus of an ecumenical council, and that the Western Church needs to return to using the creed as it was originally written without the Latin interpolation. Thus, Christians would all together once more process our faith in "the Holy Spirit, who proceeds from the Father."
Other areas touch on Church discipline and governance. Those teaching Catholic theology in the name of the Church would need to do so in a demonstrably faithful ("orthodox") way. Those celebrating the Church's liturgy would need to do so in a way that avoids much of the silliness, the slovenliness and the banality that still afflict Masses today. The Orthodox would want to know that their own system of electing and disciplining bishops would remain free of Roman curial interference. And they would want it clearly understood that their own tradition (which is also the tradition of Eastern Catholics and those Anglican and Lutheran clergy who are now Catholic priests) of ordaining married men to the priesthood would remain untouched, and nobody would be forced to adopt celibacy.
Another area, which few of us have begun seriously to grapple with, touches both doctrine and discipline: marriage. Here, if anywhere, is where ecumenism becomes real for many people living in mixed or irregular marriages. This discussion about marriage discipline has only recently begun among Catholics, as we have seen this year, but it may yet present issues of considerable magnitude and messiness. In brief, how are we to reconcile what seem to be somewhat differing disciplines in the Catholic and Orthodox Church for Christians who divorce civilly and want to be married (again) sacramentally? Would everyone have to get a declaration of nullity? Would those divorced and remarried remain ineligible for the Eucharist or, after a period of suitable penance, would they be welcomed again at the Lord's table? Would we require consistent practice retroactively, or only going forward together as Orthodox and Catholics in one Church? Nobody has the answers here because nobody's been asking the questions until very recently.
As we look back over 50 years, we have much cause for rejoicing and gratitude at the progress that has been made. But there is much work ahead. In the coming weeks, months and years, Catholics must continue, as Pope John Paul II said in Orientale Lumen, to grow in love, knowledge and esteem for their Eastern Christian brethren. Spend time learning about the East, valuing her unique heritage and patrimony, and coming to see that our differences are not contradictory, but complementary. Would it not be grand if, by 2054 — 1,000 years after the Church was torn apart — we could have the pope and patriarchs and heads of all the Orthodox Churches gather once more to celebrate the Eucharist together and to proclaim, at long last, the healing of a grievous wound to the Body of Christ?
Adam A.J. DeVille is a professor in the Department of Theology and Philosophy at the University of Saint Francis (Indiana).
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The HyperMac Nano by HyperShop is an external battery for iPhone and iPod with a built in charging cable. It's highly portable, looks and feels great, and is made of 1800mAh lithium ion which provides up 1.5 times full recharge of the iPhone.
To learn more and get details about the give-away, follow us after the break!
The design of the HyperMac Nano is very slick and reminds me a cigarette lighter. With dimensions of only 3.4" x 1.5" x 0.55", the battery will fit easily into your jeans or jacket pocket for easy portability. The rounded edges of the aluminum casing also feels nicely in your hands. The HyperMac comes in 9 stylish colors; yes, the same 9 colors available for the iPod nano.
What makes the HyperMac Nano unique to other external batteries is the built in charging cable. Underneath the cap you will find both male and female 30-pin sockets plugged into each other. The cap also conveniently snaps magnetically to the bottom of the battery so you don't lose it when the battery is in use.
To charge the HyperMac Nano, just plug your iPhone cable into the female socket; and to charge your iPhone, plug the male socket into your iPhone. When the HyperMac Nano is plugged into a power source, a blue light will indicate that it is charging and a green light will mean the charge is complete.
When on the go, I found the HyperMac Nano more convenient than an extended battery because it did not increase the length of my iPhone. I could easily fit them together in my jacket pocket without fear of them falling out because the short cable is long enough to rest the battery behind my iPhone and so nothing sticks out of my pocket.
In conclusion, I found the HyperMac Nano to be a great and stylish way to give my iPhone some extra juice.
Now for the give-away! Just leave a comment below and let us know why HyperMac Nano will be a great addition to you life. We'll pick one of you randomly and send you a silver HyperMac Nano. (The You need a valid email address and a US shipping address to enter. The contest starts now and ends Sunday, March 14, 2010.
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Now that all of the new legislators have been sworn in, and we have celebrated the inauguration of our statewide elected officials, the 97th General Assembly is fully under way. Now we can get down to the business of serving our constituents.
During the first weeks of legislative session, most of the work is done in the various committees. Bills are discussed, and testimony is heard from state departments and policy specialists about the nature of the legislation and how it will affect the state. Committee hearings are also open to the public, and can be a great way to get involved and learn about the lawmaking process.
This session, I am proud to be the Chairman of the Veterans' Affairs and Health Committee, as well as a member of the Agriculture, Food Production and Outdoor Resources Committee, the Appropriations Committee, the Joint Committee on Life Sciences, and the Education Committee.
Next week, the Appropriations Committee will begin work on the state budget, which is one of the most important, as well as one of the most difficult tasks facing the legislature every year. Deciding how to spend your tax dollars is a huge responsibility, and I look forward to meeting with this and all my assigned committees over the coming months.
My goal as a state legislator has always been to help make Missouri a better place to live, work, and raise a family.
Always feel free to contact me throughout the year with any comments, questions, or issues by calling my office at (573) 751-5713 or by visiting my website at www.senate.mo.gov/brown.
Thank you for reading this and for your participation in state government.


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Microsoft has posted the change log for the Windows Phone 7.10.8858.136, otherwise known as the Windows Phone 7.8 update.
While the hardware of our old Windows Phone 7.5 devices couldn't support a full-blown update to Windows Phone 8, the 7.8 update offers us a few performance tweaks but mostly cosmetic changes. And that's not necessarily a bad thing.
The change log is as follows.
- Start Screen: Provides resizable Live Tiles (small, medium, large) to provide for more customization options for your Start Screen.
- Accent Colors: Increases the number of available accent or theme colors to twenty.
- Lock Screen: Improves the lock screen performance with accidental wipe protection and rotating wallpapers provided through the Bing image of the day.
- Marketplace and Xbox: Expands Windows Phone Marketplace and Xbox support to new countries and regions.
- Fonts: Enhances the Chinese font and improves the appearance of Arabic and other languages.
Microsoft also notes that the 7.8 update includes many "other improvements" to Windows Phone in the change log.
The Windows Phone 7.8 update continues to roll out but may not be available yet in all markets or for all phones. You can always try to force the update, install the .cab files manually or even try a home grown updater tool to see if you can update your Windows Phone 7.5 device sooner than later.
Source: Windows Phone