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Night falls on Rhode Island (Redemption Island) and a supermodel makes his way through the jungle thick. It's Grant and he's a little flummoxed as to who voted him out of the game. Was it Rob or was it Phillip? Uh brainiac, it was BOTH! Grant also tells us he's A-Okay with it, but all evidence last night points to the contrary. Apparently, Grant and his mayonnaise hair hold 8 month long grudges which is kind of strange considering he's a yoga doing, peace loving Buddhist. Those Buddhists are such bitches when they're backstabbed. Anyhow, the Rhode Island inhabitants sleepily welcome this new member while one little fluffy girl, Mascaroni (Andrea), curses under her breath and watches all of her Rhode Island Duel dreams flitter away into the starlight. She's pissed off that Grant showed up because now she's got to go up against three burly men in order to stay in the game. One has been in combat, one has played for the NFL and the other is a flipping instrument of God. Can one tiny long-lashed farm girl defeat the likes of these three brutes? We'll have to wait and see. Until then, Mascaroni settles into her patch of her dirt outside the shelter and prepares for another long sleepless night with her turtle pillow. If only Mr. Turtle wasn't so gaseous.
Over at Murlonio the tribe struggles to come to terms with the fact that getting rid of Grant was a necessity. That elimination hurt far more than any of the others, but in the end Survivor is a game. So yeah, off with his head! Actually, it wasn't even really Grant's time. It was supposed to be Assley (Ashley) who went home. That useless reed of a woman Assley. For 30 some odd days she's said nothing, done nothing, meant nothing. She's a fart in the water. A lazy insignificant backdrop who has added zilch to this game in the way of strategy or drama. The problem is that now she's actually winning challenges. Now she comes to life. After a month of being a drab beige carpet, she's become a nuisance. Rob doesn't trust her, Phillip can't stand her and this bitch needs to go sooner rather than later. Anyone who treats Survivor like a trip to Canyon Ranch can rot in hell as far I'm concerned and get a really nasty foot fungus from dirty pedicure equipment. Since she treats everything like a vacay, she should suffer vacay maladies. Let's throw in some food poisoning while we're at it. Bad crab salad maybe. That's good for at least 2 days of nonstop vomiting.
So while Rob is busy planning intricately detailed ways to send Assley on her merry way, Pretty Pony (Matt) is out communing with God. Perched on a cliff overlooking the sea, the pony marvels at nature's glory. He's smitten with it's majesty. Hair blowing in the breeze, pectorals glistening, this wild and primal corner of the earth has been his home for the past 85 days. Bullshit. It's been his pulpit. The Pretty Pony has managed to convert everyone he comes into contact with into an annoying "I love God" person. Churches need to hire him to convert the godless. Send the Adonis into polytheistic tribal societies and after one week you'll have a whole new slew of god fearing Christians with weirdly mechanical smiles on their faces. Maybe it's Pretty Pony's passion that is so mesmerizing. Or, maybe it's his all over tan and perfectly rounded ass. *shrugs shoulders* I have no idea. All I know is that everything with the pony needs a prayer. Whether it's a bite of rice or tree mail or about the final duel, it all requires prayer. That sort of blind faith just seems so silly to me. Unless a ghost hunter can capture an EVP with God saying he's tuning into CBS every Wednesday night, I'm pretty sure He doesn't give a shit about a reality show. He's much too busy killing people with tsunamis and earthquakes and famine and disease to worry about whether or not the Pretty Pony makes it to the final Tribal Council.
Speaking of final duels, whoosh, splash, kerplop! Here we are at the last stupidly stupid dumbass moronic Rhode Island duel of the season. Deep in my loins I hoped it was the last anything having to do with Rhode Island, but then I saw that Survivor: South Pacific promo and all of my lady parts shriveled up into useless bits of nothing. I'm infertile now. Thank you Rhode Island. Thanks for nothing. Ok so for this duel Survivors will place their foot on one end of a balancing board. On the other end is a ceramic vase. When the vase falls, you're out of the game and headed to the Jury. The winner will go back to Murlonio and rejoin the game. Survivors ready, go.
The challenge begins and it's smooth sailing for the first 20 minutes. The sun beats down strong, the wind doesn't seem to be a problem and all of our little Survivor soldiers are doing very well. Mascaroni scratches her tummy in indifference while the Pretty Pony has a look on his face that says, "Don't let me down now God." Grant with his impossibly long limbs begins to waver, but recovers quickly while Mascaroni gives him the side eye. The unsteadiness seems to be contagious as both Pretty Pony and Cold War Mike have tiny hiccups of their own. 40 minutes passes and Grant leans over to stretch out his 3 foot long calf. With a leg that long, muscles are bound to tense up and get all crazy like. And get all crazy like they do cuz Grant's vase drops and he's outta the game! Later alligator. Go pout and hold some endless grudges now.
One hour passes and the sun is merciless on our 3 remaining contenders. It mocks them with it's heat. Mascaroni gently stretches her tiny leg and I shouted at the screen, "No! Didn't you see what happened to Grant?!" And then I chucked about 5 tubes of CoverGirl Thick Lash Mascara at the tv screen. She recovers from her stretch without incident, but down on the other end of the challenge God is about to play a very cruel joke. Rewatching this a second time, it's clear to me that only He is responsible for what happens next. Pretty Pony was still. He was focused. He didn't jostle and he didn't waver. But, out of nowhere, as if a bony finger emerged from the sky, his vase tipped over and then went plop. Pretty Pony's face shriveled in horror. In a matter of seconds everything he ever believed in disappeared in front of his eyes. He stroked his chin in confusion and wondered why God didn't play better. Pretty Pony truly believed that God had been playing for him all along. Looking at his devastation was like watching a child discover there is no Santa Claus. Pretty Pony wondered in that moment if maybe other things weren't true as well. Maybe Jonah didn't live for three days inside that whale. Maybe Moses didn't really part the Red Sea. Could it be that all he believed in were fairy tales? It's a heady thing when fantasy and childlike wonder leaves a person. It causes people to react in strange and horrifying ways - like, maybe, it'll make someone cut their hair so they look like they belong in a boy band rather than looking like they're part of a sexy motorcycle gang. You had no business cutting that hair Pretty Pony. No business! Damn you! So, yeah, he's outta the game.
It's now down to Cold War Mike in his drabby gray grays and Mascaroni. Mike wavers and recovers while Mascaroni grips her leg and tries to ignore the heat. Mike wipes the sweat from his brow and that's all she wrote... MASCARONI STAYS IN THE GAME!!! Good girl. Love her. How can you not love a fluffy farm girl with magically mystical lashes and a valley girl lilt? She's cuteness personified. Plus, she just humiliated three beefy bohunks. Awesome.
Mascaroni isn't all cuteness and light though. She's also an evil little liar who likes to mess with people's heads. *claps and giggles* She returns to Murlonio and it's a little awkward at first. These are the very people who blindsided her. Initially, she sits alone and watches the others from a distance, but the second Rob and Phil leave the Fembots unattended, Mascaroni makes her move. She approaches Tattalie (Natalie) and Assley with her trademark wide-eyed innocence, but quickly shifts gears and begins to unfurl tiny little daggers of evil. First, she tells the girls that all the boys on Rhode Island think the girls are all puppets. Then, she says that Rooster (Ralph) and Pretty Pony are planning to vote for Phillip. The Fembots interest is piqued and they wonder aloud how Mike will vote. Mascaroni tells them he's voting for Phillip too and then she skips off with a glint in her eye that shows she's very pleased with herself for planting the seeds that just might save her ass. Who knows if her efforts will pay off? At least she tried. At least she did something. At least she contributed and didn't loll around the shelter sniffing another girl's armpits while being about as interesting as a giant slug.
And now we arrive at the first Immunity Challenge of the night. All that matters is that Assley doesn't win. Rob wants her gone, Phillip wants her gone and, most importantly, I want her gone. She's a boil on the butt of humanity and I'm sick of looking at her long pointed face. For this challenge, Survivors must race across a balance beam collecting a series of bags containing numbered tiles. First person to place the tiles in order from 1-100 wins Immunity. Really? Really. Numbered tiles. We're letting a challenge that any 2nd grader can do determine our final four? Come on Survivor! What the hell is going on here? The challenges are weak, the casting sucks, the twists are lame. This is not the Survivor of yesteryear. This is TJMaxx Survivor. Marshalls Survivor. It's half off and slightly imperfect. It says Ralph Lauren, but the polo guy is missing a mallet and the horse is 3-legged. Survivors ready, go!
In the interest of saving time and because I abhored the way it ended, I'm going to cruise through this challenge. Rob race, race, raced. Mascaroni used her fairy wings to fly. Tattalie ran out into the ocean and drowned. Phillip pieced all the beams together to make a giant TeePee. And, that insufferable maggot Assley wins Immunity. Shit, fuck, doody.
Back at camp it's pretty clear that Mascaroni's time back in the game is limited. She's a hard worker, she's likable and she's good at challenges. As far as Rob is concerned, it's a no brainer. He tells the Fembots and Phillip to vote out Mascaroni and then he goes out fishing. Assley yanks Tattalie into the woods and demands to know that if she votes out Mascaroni tonight, Phillip will be the next one to go. Tattalie nods dumbly and replies, "I'm like, you know, feeling the same, you know, there's a possibility, and, like I don't know, you just never know, you know? Right." Why, thank you Tattalie. You've just managed to suck all the life out of life. We were all brain dead there for a second and, as a result, the world is just a little bit dumber now. Equations no longer work, great works of art toppled off their walls and somewhere a magnificent feat in engineering buckled and gave way. Even I tried to plug my hair dryer into the microwave this morning. I've forgotten how things worked. I left the house earlier today I can't for the life of me figure out why my blush brush won't lock my front door or why my car won't start simply by me sitting on it. Whether she's out in the woods or sitting on a panel on live television, Tattalie should never ever talk again, ever! We're all freaking idiots now because of her.
Phillip sees the Fembots talking in the woods so he radios to Langley, "The eagle has landed. 10-4 good buddy. Renegade is in transit. Confidence is high." And then he strapped on his vest of palm leaves and coconut skins before checking that his sqaudron of army ants was properly deployed. After some face time with a tree, he leaps over towards Rob and informs him that two girls were out in the woods talking. He doesn't know why they were talking or what they were talking about, but they were talking. He'll man the perimeter for the rest of the day and keep Rob abreast of any new developments. Rob thanks Phillip for his service to the country and then releases another feather in the air for him to go chase. It's been Rob all along releasing feathers. He's got a bag of them hidden behind the shelter.
This brings us to our first Tribal Council of the night. Rob begins by saying that paranoia is high and a lot of talking is going on. Phillip then somersaults dangerously close to the fire and reminds everyone that he's the Undercover Specialist. The Jury giggles in response while Rob chucks another feather behind his back and Phillip goes chasing after it. Assley says something about something, but I really have no idea what it was. Whenever she pops on screen I close my eyes, put my fingers in my ears and try to hold my breath long enough to lose consciousness. Mascaroni speaks next and she talks about how she tried to convince the Fembots to get rid of Rob. As we all now know, the girls already knew Rob had the Immunity Idol so Mascaroni's efforts were pretty much inconsequential. Rob plays his Idol and Mascaroni is the 16th person voted out of Survivor: Redemption Island. I enjoyed watching Mascaroni and she was a loyal fan of this here little blog. She's a good sport and I hope we get to see her again on another season with more worthy players. Maybe she'll be back for South Pacific. Fingers crossed.
The final four return to camp and Phillip is desperate for a group hug. The Fembots run to embrace Rob while Phillip approaches from the outside and dry humps them all. He grunts and burbles and annouces, "That was so special!" It was freaky and awkward and made no sense - kind of like this whole season which is why I used the phrase as my final title. Afterwards, Assley steals away to find a quiet corner so she can unleash her squirrely wrath on Mascaroni. It turns out that Assley is pissed that Mascaroni said she and Tattalie haven't made any big moves in the game and tried to throw them under the bus in front of the Jury. Assley, honey, denial ain't just a river in Egypt. You are a ridiculous waste of skin who has done nothing in this game but lie around, bitch and let a man you hardly know control your every move. Now shut up and go back to picking nits out of your sister wife's hair. Rob will call for you when your battery needs changing.
And here we are at our last Immunity Challenge of the season. Survivors must race through a giant maze collecting four bags of puzzle pieces. Once they have all four bags, they will race to the top of a platform to solve the word puzzle. The first person to spell the phrase ONLY YOU ARE SAFE, wins. Survivors ready, go!
Everyone bursts forth into the maze and scatters. Dead ends lie everywhere and the second Tattalie encounters one she keeps running into it repeatedly and spends the rest of the challenge hurling her body against a random wall. Rob spies a path to the first station and goes for it. Assley follows him because that what Assley does: she follows. Phillip somehow manages to find a station all on his own and all three get their first bag of puzzle pieces. The same exact scenario plays out while they go for their second bags. While heading towards the third bag, Rob tries to lose Assley (cuz she's fucking annoying), but she stays stuck on him like white on rice. Phillip gets lost in a dead end and tries to dig his way out.
Rob and Assley get their third bag of puzzle pieces and it's a sprint to the fourth. Rob reaches the last station first with Assley right behind him. Now it's a race back to Dimples. Rob gets up the ladder first and very calmly begins to work on his puzzle pieces. Assley joins him and the music begins thumping. The puzzle pieces are weird misshapen 3-D cubes that bend and fold into various positions. Rob jokes with Assley about helping each other out, but neither give up any info. Rob begins to make headway so Assley looks over at his table and tries to cheat. You know what Assley? Cheaters never prosper and ROB WINS IMMUNITY!!! His hat goes flying, he yawps loudly, he breaks down into tears and he knows, man does he know... he just won a million dollars. We all knew in that moment. Everyone everywhere knew. Well, everyone except Tattalie, who inexplicably started crying for no reason at all, and maybe Assley, who looked confused that she lost. Phillip's reaction was the weirdest though. He was truly happy for Rob which leads me to believe that he's not on Survivor to win at all. He's just there to hang out and if he can stop the bad guys and man the ports in the meantime, then great. Two birds, one stone.
Back at camp there is only one mission: get rid of Assley. It's a mission I love and admire. The only problem is Tattalie. Tattalie is always the problem. She's never the solution. She's a hiccup. A split end. A double negative. She's a pebble in your shoe. A black fly in your chardonnay. Rain on your wedding day. She's a freaking Alanis Morissette song. Exhausting and annoying. So, Rob's mission is to get Tattalie to agree to vote out Assley. He walks by her, turns the switch on his remote control to "Vote Assley" and it's done. That's it. Assley is voted out at the next Tribal Council. Easy peasy. The best part about it is that she actually felt safe. Ahahaha! Suck it loser. Assley is the 17th person voted out of Survivor: Redemption Island.
Back at camp, Phillip is wrapped in a blanket with a giant peacock feather sticking out of his forehead talking about how Jessum Harring came to him in a vision and told him to go back on his meds. You see, Toni Morrison (Phillip's sister) called Jessum, who's alive and well and living in Ft. Lauderdale, right after leaving Nicaragua and told him that Phillip was talking to dead people again. Jessum promptly flew to Nicaragua, walked right up to Phillip one night when he was out getting some water and said, "Don't worry. Everything will be ok. Burn your panties and keep the faith." Phillip thought it was an apparition and here we are now watching him dressed up as the blanket monster. The blanket monster is a little bit like the boogie man. He's scary to think about, but he's not the least bit dangerous.
In lieu of the godawful In Memorium burning of the torches we had the burning of the panties. Phillip obeyed Jessum Harring's orders and gave a moving speech about his manhood not being reflected by the color of his briefs. He held them up high for all to see. Flies buzzed around. I think I saw a crab holding it's nose crawl out as Phillip said, "With happiness and joy as I approach my destiny I bid you ado." Yes, he said "ado". And that play by Shakespeare is really called Much Adieu About Nothing. With a salute to the sky and a click of his heels, Phillip flung the offensive underwear into a nonburning fire where it sat limply among the ashes and devoured itself with its own fumes. Jessum Harring watched from the trees and mumbled to himself, "Like all good things, some things must come to an end." And then he called Bellevue and booked a bed in the maximum security ward for one Mr. Phillip Sheppard.
And that brings us to the final Tribal Council. We begin with opening remarks and Tattalie is up first. "Umm I made it 39 days you know and umm played the best game I could you know. Umm tee hee hee my strength is my social skill. I chose to align with Rob from the very beginning and the microchip in my hip doesn't really hurt anymore. Alliance, me, that's how, ummm, I made it this far. *pause* Loyal. *pause* Umm *pause* I don't know *pause* Umm I deserve to be here? I'm the youngest female. Winner. Survivor. Ever. Rob is king." And then her head exploded and we all cheered.
Next up is the Blanket Monster. "I deserve to be here. I didn't know the strategy I had put in place wouldn't work because of Boston Rob. My morse code machines shorted out. Goose had that accident and then all these feathers started flying. I changed my strategy because the Wombosi mission failed and Treadstone had to be shutdown. After communication with Langley, I identified the target and continued my mission. God bless America. I know pronounce you Jury and wife. Rob is king. Hit the decks!" And then he got up and started shooting everyone with his finger.
Rob went last and it was just what we expected. Thoughtful, organized, smart, he thanked everyone and point by point outlined his strategy and his strengths. He was coherent and easy to follow, inspirational and motivated, concise yet detailed. He gave homage to Survivor as a game and was sincere in mentioning his love for his family. It was the perfect speech. He had 10 years to get it right. How could it be anything but perfect?
Now it's time for the Jury to ask their questions. Mascaroni is up first and right out of the gate she cracks me up. "Phillip, you are weird." She asks Phillip who the real Phillip Sheppard is and he answered by telling her not to vote for him. Mascaroni then turns to Tattalie and tells her that her relationship with Rob was creepy. Tattalie replies, "I've never been camping" and that was the end of that.
Assley said blah blah blah and I said die die die. I'm done giving her blog space.
Grant goes next and he wants to know when Tattalie made her alliance with Rob. Exactly what time and where did it happen because his alliance with Rob was made on July 19th and 10:00 am in the morning down by the watering hole. Was her alliance before that or after that? If it was after then it doesn't count and Grant can be mad for the rest of his life. Boo hoo hoo. Blurgh. Namaste.
Rooster Ralph is up next and it went something like this: "Wayell, preshyate y'all makin' it thar ladees n gentle'un. Natlee, seem lahk yew kint narly do nuttin' witow Rahb. Lahk a keeyid! Yew nayver did tawk ta me in da gehm. Peeryod. Nayver did. Pheelp. Ya lit me dow'. I's hopin' hole cheekin on yer 'ed. Tell me why'nch ya git 'nymore faythers thin that? Dyew rilly lahk me?" Aww, I got sad in that moment because I realized that all Ralph ever wanted was to make friends. Living on the side of that mountain in Virginie makin' the 'shine under the cover of night doesn't afford him a lot of opportunities to meet new people. He's got Harlon, but that's about it. Well, now he's got Phile too. Two peas in a pod. Give me a call Rooster. I'll drank the 'shine wit ya.
Now we come to the Pretty Pony. The beautious luscious pony with his freshly washed flaxen locks framing his face. If only he was a mute. "Duplicitous, manipulating, deceiving, liar. Bad, bad, bad. Bible. God. Good, good , good. Amen."
Leatherface Julie is up next and she was a real treat wasn't she? Bitter much ya ole briefcase? She spent her time telling Tattalie she's humiliated her parents and should probably never go home because clearly they've disowned her by now. She tells Phillip to put his kid up for adoption because he's a horrible father and then she tells Rob his daughters are hopeless and will grow up to be awful people. Thanks for that you wrinkled up handbag. Please, because I'm so interested, tell me what you did that's of any value whatsoever in this game. Go polish your skin and buy yourself a new buckle or something. Install a giant zipper over those things you call teeth. My god, you're rude. I don't particularly care for Tattalie and Phillip either, but I'd never tell them how much they've humiliated their families. Who the hell are you to sit in judgment? You went on a tv show to pay your bills. How about getting a job instead you scuffed up old boot. Jesus Christ you're awful! Have you met Nanook yet? I have a feeling you two would get along famously.
Mike went next and he's found God yadda yadda yadda. SHUT. UP. My god, shut up! Can you tell my patience is wearing thin? You are ridiculous, Mike. Ridiculous! You should have been the star this season. You would have had America by the short and curlies had you only had a personality. Instead, you're the dork who gave the family visit to his enemies. Good luck getting laid now douchebag.
The Cuddler is up next and it looks like he's finally come to his senses. He's gracious and congratulatory to both Tattalie and Rob. He actually seemed like a nice guy with a decent personality. When he told Phillip he was sorry for him and what he's made of himself, I laughed. Outside of the game, Steve is probably a decent guy. Inside of the game, he's a wretched bag of bones who wouldn't know strategy if it sat on his face.
Finally, we have Lawyer Dave. Being that Lawyer Dave is Lawyer Dave he decided to give the closing arguments to the Jury. In the courtroom drama in his head, he was fighting for Rob to be proven innocent and awarded one million dollars in damages for having to put up with that crappy lot of contenders. He outlined how Rob controlled each and every one of their minds and for a second I worried that Dave might actually do more harm than good. I thought he might just piss these people off enough for them to vote the opposite way. I mean, let's face it. That's the type of crew we're dealing with here. They're a bitter lot who are all still shocked they're sitting on the side they're sitting on. It was a good speech and I appreciated Lawyer Dave mixing it up a little bit. He was an arrogant ass coming in and he was an arrogant ass going out, but you know what? He was interesting to watch. He's another one I wouldn't mind seeing back to play the game. Just, no more awkward proposals please. I beg you.
So, there you have it. Vote, vote, vote. ROB IS THE WINNER OF SURVIVOR: REDEMPTION ISLAND. It was a deserved win and he really did play one hell of a game so congratulations to him.
Survivor is a show I've always held in the highest esteem. It's that one show I compare all other shows to, but this season was downright embarrassing. It started off great, but went downhill fast. Hopefully, I've managed to entertain you a little bit here. If you've enjoyed what I've done this season, please click on my PayPal button and show a girl some love. You can find me this summer at the Bitchy Big Brother Blog covering BB13 daily. Barring any injuries where I lose function of my hands, I will be back blogging Survivor in the Fall. I mean, come on, how could I not? Thank you so much everyone for coming back here weekly and taking the time to comment. You guys rock. Comment it out bitches (again) and have a great day!


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A June 1 wedding is being planned by Amy Franek of Charlottesville, Va., and James Porter of Fenelton.
The bride-to-be is the daughter of James Franek of Butler and Marilyn Gust of Christiansburg, Va. Parents of the prospective bridegroom are Barry and Karen Porter of Fenelton.
The bride-elect is a 2004 graduate of Butler High School, a 2008 graduate of Saint Vincent College and a 2012 graduate of Duquesne Univeristy with her doctorate.
She is employed by Fluvanna County Public Schools in Palmyra, Va.
Her fianc� graduated in 2004 from Butler High School in 2008 from Saint Vincent College and in 2011 from Villanova University with his masters.
He is employed by Talisman Energy in Cranberry Township.

subset: commoncrawl


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Fleas are the bane of many a pet owner. Even people without animals in their homes can become infested with these agile, fast-multiplying parasites. The minute any warm-blooded creature -- including you -- leaves your house, he or she becomes fair game for fleas or flea eggs, which can be carried in on shoes or via a breeze through an open window. A single female may lay up to 500 eggs during her lifetime, with egg production stimulated by blood meals. That means each time a flea bites you or your cat, many more fleas are in your future.
Scientists, however, recently discovered that the deadliest flea weapon is probably tucked away right now in your closet. It's your vacuum cleaner.
But not just any vacuum cleaner is effective against fleas. There are certain vacuum size and weight requirements and particular places you need to target when cleaning. If you are concerned about fleas, as well as the potential health effects of pesticides, the following information may forever change the way you deal with pet parasites.
How Your Vacuum Kills Fleas
According to entomologist Glen Needham, PhD, of Ohio State University, not much research had been done on how vacuuming kills fleas. He and colleague W. Fred Hink, PhD, were curious what happens to fleas after they've been vacuumed up. Dr. Hink decided to raise fleas at various life stages before placing them on a carpet. He then cleaned the area with a vacuum that had a permanent cloth bag fitted with a disposable paper inner bag. Both scientists were surprised by what they saw when they placed the bag's contents under a microscope.
"There were all of these crispy little dead things that used to be live fleas," Dr. Needham says. "Ninety-six percent of all the adult fleas had died, while one hundred percent of the flea pupae and larvae had died."
Puzzled by the flea carnage, Dr. Hink conducted further experiments to determine what exactly killed these fleas. He ruled out the possibility that the paper bag wasn't somehow toxic or that the power of the moving air did in the fleas. "We instead believe that the vacuum machinery itself, particularly the brushes, bangs up the fleas to such a violent degree that they perish," Dr. Needham says.
He explains that all ticks, fleas, mites and many other parasites need water to survive. To preserve body moisture, fleas secrete a waxy substance that coats the outside of their bodies. Fleas often repair minor damage to the wax layer, but "the vacuum machinery must penetrate this protective layer to such a degree that wax coating is irreparable."
Not Just Any Vacuum De-Fleas
While the scientists didn't test multiple vacuum brands, they theorize that older vacuums, with inner brushes and bags, work better at killing fleas than most of the "sexy" newer vacuums with less inner moving parts. Many of the newer vortex suction vacuums, for example, probably lack the punishing parts that cause fleas to kick the bucket.
If you have an older vacuum that still works, you may consider pulling it out for your flea-targeted cleanups. For the study, the scientists used a Royal Deluxe upright all-metal vacuum, Model M1010. Any vacuum that's a similar size and shape will do the trick. If you don't already have one, you can find them at your local appliance store or used models at, yes, your local flea market.
Best Ways to Foil Fleas
The scientists suggest these measures for keeping your home flea free:
The Future of Home Flea Control
At present, Dr. Needham is investigating a new technology that will allow people to have their high tech, sexy vacuums and still be able to kill fleas, as well as destroy fungi, bacteria and germs. Such systems use ultraviolet radiation to zap the pests dead. "It may revolutionize cleaning," he says, "and the federal government is also interested, since similar devices may be used in the event of a bioterrorist attack." He adds that both upright and hand-held UV-based vacuums should be on the market in the not-too-distant future.
*DISCLAIMER*: The information contained in or provided through this site section is intended for general consumer understanding and education only and is not intended to be and is not a substitute for professional advice. Use of this site section and any information contained on or provided through this site section is at your own risk and any information contained on or provided through this site section is provided on an "as is" basis without any representations or warranties.


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As we come down to the end of the school year and another group of seniors move on to college, I am left with a bit of sadness. While I strive to keep a "professional distance" from the athletes I cover, I always find myself getting to know the student athletes and their parents. I recall the fond memories I have of capturing a special moment for them with a camera or having the honor of describing their athletic exploits in print.
Word is that Ali Cunningham will be joining the Cross Country team at West Virginia Wesleyan. What an absolute steal for that program. I believe Ali will be the first female United States President. You heard it here first folks…
Recently, Jacob Haynes signed with the Alderson Broaddus golf program. Haynes starred in basketball, tennis and golf at Ripley. I will miss capturing photos of Haynes' 3-point bombs on the basketball court. He was always a pleasant interview.
Greg Medina has signed with the Alderson Broaddus wrestling program. The start-up program is in its first year and is coached by former Viking 3-time State Champion Mitch Smith, the brother of current Viking Coach Matt Smith. Greg is a very nice young man and a smooth practical joker (I still owe him one).
Daryl Hicks is still undecided, but with interest from next level coaches in both wrestling and football, Hicks has a plethora of options. Daryl is a quality person, his father Dwayne must be very proud of the young man his son has become.
Nate Starkey will be wrestling at Wheeling Jesuit University this fall. Starkey became one of my favorite young athletes over the last two years. I will miss watching him attack from his patented "cat-like stance" on the mats. The Wheeling West Virginia based school will kick off its first season on the mats in 2013. First year coach Sean Doyle had wonderful things to say about Starkey in a phone conversation earlier this week.
"Nate has tremendous physical gifts. I think that what makes him truly special is his upbringing that helps to define his character and his drive to succeed. He is an exceptional student and all of these things make him desirable as a student-athlete at Wheeling Jesuit University."
I will write more about other Ripley athletes going to the next level in a future column…
While I don't get a chance to cover Ravenswood High sports very often, I did enjoy writing about first year baseball skipper Wes Swain's baseball team. With 12 wins so far this season, you can't help but marvel at the improvement over the two win season from a year ago. Swain is always finding ways to promote his kids much like Ripley baseball coach Shane Casto. I appreciate and respect that in both young coaches.
My beloved Sherman Tide rolls into Ravenswood on Saturday for a double-header with the Red Devil baseball team. I look forward to covering Jeremiah Pettry's team as his father Aaron coached me from 1987-89. The son took over the program from the father, which is a nice story in itself. Jeremiah was an enthusiastic bat-boy in my playing days. He was also a stand-out Tide slugger from 1998-'01. His brother Matthew serves as an assistant coach. The years have simply escaped me…
John Hunter is the Tide's shining star on a team forced to play a lot of freshman and sophomores. The junior infielder/pitcher has been putting up video game numbers (.540 BA) for the Tide and garnering tremendous attention.
"I have been following Hunter this season and from what I have been told by other coaches, he is the real deal," said Red Devil coach Wes Swain.
The Ripley softball team is racing into sectionals with only a double header on Saturday versus Parkersburg South left on their schedule. A recent upset of No. 2 hurricane has given the Lady Vikings a real boost. Chelsey Hager has stepped up in a huge way for Coach Ken Swisher. The junior has been nearly unhittable in recent games.
The 22nd Ripley football coach will be introduced on May 2. Sources tell me that there were only five applicants for the position before the deadline of last Tuesday. True or not, it appears that there wasn't as much interest in the position that many felt there would be. We all know that at least three of those that applied were current assistant coaches.
It makes one ponder why there is so little interest in a job that boasts a fine facility, supportive community and a principal (Will Hosaflook) who is a first class administrator and has spent time as an assistant football coach which allows him to understand the needs of the program and its on field leader. Until we meet again….
COLUMN: Phil for the Game
As we come down to the end of the school year and another group of seniors move on to college, I am left with a bit of sadness. While I strive to keep a "professional distance" from the athletes I cover, I always find myself getting to know the student athletes and their parents. I recall the fond memories I have of capturing a special moment for them with a camera or having the honor of describing their athletic exploits in print.


text:
Best definition
Lord Pristic
The realest neimon on the west side of Compton. Capped like 30 motherfuckers in one night and didn't even give a fuck. Probably fucked your bitch in the ass so hard that she went home and had to shit the nut out. Really does fuck the baddest west side hoes and smokes an ounce a week.
Wow Lord Pristic fucked my bitch. #ThankYouLordPristic


text:
The Commission on Science and Technology for Development (CSTD) is a subsidiary body of the Economic and Social Council (ECOSOC).
The Commission provides the General Assembly and ECOSOC with high-level advice on relevant science and technology issues.
UNCTAD is responsible for the substantive servicing of the Commission.
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text:
Dear Reader: Do you think you are related to the individuals listed in this post? Please drop me a note! I love hearing from cousins and others researching my family!
For those who followed my series on Arlington Abbey Mausoleum (see Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3), you may remember that when I read up on the mausoleum and its unfortunate history of vandalism and looting, I learned that the remains of several of my ancestors were missing. Shortly thereafter, my half-brother remembered an old copy of our father's will in which he stated that he'd bought a a burial spot for relatives bearing his last name at another cemetery.
A phone call to Parklawn Memorial Park in Rockville, Md., confirmed that my paternal grandfather and his parents are indeed buried there, and I found out the exact location of where their remains can be found today. Saturday, I was in the area and paid a visit to the cemetery. When I arrived at the building described to me by the cemetery staff, my eyes lit upon my surname almost immediately.
Bingo. But, I must say, the genealogist in me was a bit disappointed. The name "Corley" is all that's engraved into the marble face of their vault. I had hoped to see all three of their names listed. I harbored a twinge of jealousy after seeing the other vaults with more detailed information listed.
Because this genealogist is a bit unsatisfied, I do plan to call back the staff at the cemetery and see if I can get a copy of the burial record. After all this searching, I want more tangible proof that all of them really are in there.
Still, I was glad to get the chance to visit the cemetery and I'm also so thankful that this mystery is solved. Others whose ancestors were buried at Arlington Abbey are not so lucky. The remains found scattered there (or that are missing altogether) may never be sorted out.


text:
Holiday Inn Lincoln Heights hotels are provided below. Search for cheap and discount Holiday Inn hotel rooms in Lincoln Heights, OH for your group or personal travels. We list the best Holiday Inn Lincoln Heights hotels so you can review the Lincoln Heights Holiday Inn hotel list below to find the perfect place.
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text:
As promised, here are the two new books I'm giving away:
Here is some info about them:
The Tale of Christmas
"The Tale of Christmas" keepsake book is back by popular demand! This adorable keepsake book tells the story of Christmas with a craft for each page. Each craft is easy to complete and uses materials that you probably already have.
What a great opportunity to make a memory with your kids as you explain to them the true meaning of Christmas!
Pages include:
Baby Jesus
Wise Men
As always, this keepsake book is a great one for parents to keep and show their kids when they get older.
Holiday Fun!
Do you love holiday craft but hate all the bits of paper and mess? My "Holiday Fun" keepsake book is the perfect solution. This book includes an original poem with a craft for each line. This book includes 11 of my all-time FAVORITE holiday crafts in one place! Kept together in a book to look at for year to come!
Craft include:
Christmas tree with lights
Christmas Cookies
Candy Cane
What a great gift for parents! Each craft is simple to complete and uses materials that you probably already have. I hope you enjoy the holiday season and making a memory with your kids!
Here's the good news! I am giving away these two books to 3 people!!
All you have to do is leave me a comment below and you'll be entered :-)
You have until Midnight tonight (EST) to enter.
If you can't wait, They are available in my TPT and
Teacher Notebook store for $3.50 each or you can purchase my "Holiday Bundle" that includes both books for $6.00.
Thanks for entering and good luck!


text:
Pantone Plastic Large Chip 16-1546 Tcx
Large-size 3in x 1-7/8in polypropylene chip standards are now available to match your favorite Pantone PLUS Series and Pantone Fashion + Home Color. Some colors may need to be special ordered.
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Please Note: All prices shown on this web site are for orders placed online only.
Pricing for phone, fax, email and in-store purchases may vary.


text:
Talk:Main Page/Archive 2
From MeritBadgeDotOrg
Every Merit Badge Pamphlet Has Been Revised
Just as an FYI, EVERY BSA Merit Badge pamphlet was just been reissued effective 1 September 2008 in full color, many with revised requirements. I tried to update the Radio MB requirements here but they're locked, so please copy the newly revised requirements from my site http://k2gw.tripod.com/radiomeritbadge/ and update the page and worksheet here. Thanks GCW50 18:30, September 9, 2008 (EDT)
Customized Sidebar (navigation pane on the left)
- Moved to: MediaWiki talk:Sidebar
Image resolution
I would like to figure out what is wrong with the image resolution. Here are two screenshot snippets of what certain images used to look like (on the left) and taken on the current install of meritbadge.org (on the right).
Any ideas? Scouterdennis 07:36, May 1, 2008 (EDT)
- I think the not so clear part was originaly .gif wich doen't allow for semi-transparent... so it can look choppy... the images I have uploaded are strictly png files...there fore they support alpha transparency...making it posible for fethering of edges. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Theundesided (talk • contribs) . (Please, sign and date your posts on talk pages.)
- It seems that this issue is still alive. See screenshots here: http://browsershots.org/http://meritbadge.org/wiki/index.php/MeritBadgeDotOrg:Copyright_policy Scouterdennis 16:28, December 3, 2008 (EST)


text:
The group will perform in Wichita Friday at 7 p.m. at the INTRUST Bank Arena in Downtown Wichita.
Multi-Grammy Award-winner Bill Gaither will host a spectacular evening of music, laughter and encouragement featuring the world-class talent of the Gaither Vocal Band.
The group will perform in Wichita Friday at 7 p.m. at the INTRUST Bank Arena in Downtown Wichita.
The Gaither Vocal Band - Mark Lowry, Michael English, David Phelps, Wes Hampton and Bill Gaither - will sing gospel classics, as well as new favorites.
The concert begins at 7 p.m., but the doors to the arena open at 5:30 p.m.
Tickets are still available for $27.50 and $36.50. Seniors (people over age 60) may purchase tickets for $24.50.
Phelps said he enjoys coming to Wichita to perform.
"I've performed in Wichita several times," Phelps said. "There is always such a warm reception there. I grew up in a small town in Texas (Tomball) and it is always amazing to me when people in a city like Wichita cheer us on."
He said he never tires of the experience of performing live.
"I always have to remind myself what an amazing opportunity it is to do what I love," he said. "It is truly a gift."


text: Course DetailThis service is currently unavailable. Please try again later.Show DetailThere was a problem processing the query string for this service. The following issues exist:Parameter 'courseID' is not a valid value (Event log entry: February 22, 2019 01:03:08.389 PM)Missing value for parameter: programID Academic Calendar Catalog and Class Schedules Online Learning Bookstore Register For Classes Request Information


text:
Useful Resources
The International Student useful resources page will assist you in locating helpful websites around the web for international and study abroad students. If you think your website is related to international education, please add our link to your website using the following code:
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- International Student Health Insurance - from InternationalStudentInsurance.com
- Universal Currency Converter - convert any current instantly online
- International Student Loans - financial aid for international and study abroad students
- Time and Date World Clock - find out what the time is anywhere in the world


text:
R.M. Ritchie, Jr., Agricultural Extension Agent photographs 1950 - 1965
Please note that some historical materials may contain offensive content.
Item information
- Title:
- R.M. Ritchie, Jr., Agricultural Extension Agent photographs 1950 - 1965
- Topics:
Community and Extension
- Subjects:
Agriculture -- Information services
- Original Format:
Color slide
- Item identifier:
- ua100_014-005-bx0025-022-067
- Digital Project:
Cultivating a Revolution
Source information
- Repository:
- Special Collections Research Center at NCSU Libraries
- Collection:
- North Carolina State University College of Agriculture and Life Sciences, Department of Biological and Agricultural Engineering Records, 1928-2008 (UA100.014) held by Special Collections Research Center at NCSU Libraries
- Note field:
- Not all materials from the physical collection may have been scanned. Images may have been enhanced for web access.
- Rights:
- For questions regarding copyright or permissions, please refer to our Reproduction, Use, Citation, and Copyright page (http://d.lib.ncsu.edu/collections/about).
- Funding:
- Digitization of this resource was partially supported with federal Library Services and Technology Act (LSTA) funds made possible through a grant from the Institute of Museum and Library Services, and administered by the State Library of North Carolina, a division of the Department of Cultural Resources.


text:
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Comic 928: Mimic Humor
Nothing really to say about this one. Randy apparently recently read about the mimic octopus and decided that it made a pretty good punchline for a comic, I guess? Or maybe the punchline is the bit where he is like "TWO mimic octopuses. DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING, DID YOU?"
Alt text sounds mostly like GOOMH-bait. But I'm okay with this one, since he mostly is just using it as a "speaking of the plural form of octopus" aside. I just wish he'd pick something and stick to it.
929, though. Oh man.
88 comments:
- AnonymousJuly 24, 2011 at 9:49 PM
RE 929: What is this shit?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 24, 2011 at 9:58 PM
You just didn't get the octopus joke. It's a math joke- with two variables and a constant you can determine the variables so if you have two mimic octopuses you can discern the octopus. It's funny if you like equations, which most xkcd readers do.ReplyDelete
I concede that 929 is not very good. Whatever happened to the classhole's fiendishness? Puncturing a ball is a child's trick.
- AnonymousJuly 24, 2011 at 10:16 PM
9:58 is completely delusional and sucks at basic algebraReplyDelete
desperation and delusion often look the sameReplyDelete
- John MagnumJuly 24, 2011 at 10:28 PM
i might have been intrigued by the universal adoption conversation if i cared about google plus. or, for that matter, about facebook.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 24, 2011 at 10:29 PM
929 roughly follows the format of character-based humor, but it falls a bit flat given that xkcd does not have charactersReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 24, 2011 at 10:31 PM
Although actually I wonder if he was going for something along the lines of pointing out that playing basketball requires "universal adoption" of the rules (or at least the basic premise) of basketball? Meh.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 24, 2011 at 11:24 PM
I am best in my class at both math and science, 10:16, I think I know xkcd very well. You're just one of those who want to complain about anything even when you find out you're wrong.ReplyDelete
Remember it's better to listen than make insults. People who go through life being so jealous of those who know better can never learn better themself.
Why oh why did I tell Ann Apolis to write for XKCD SUCKS this week? Now I can't make a post without stealing her thunder. =/ReplyDelete
Key points concerning 929:
1) Why does the guy want everyone to join Google+? I was under the impression that a large part of the appeal was that everyone and their mother WASN'T on Google+...
2) I don't understand the logic in panel 2. The reason the guy's social life doesn't happen on AOL is that it's NOT A SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE. If "everyone" stays on Facebook, then yes, your social life DOES have to happen there. (Also, it's worth noting that we've apparently precluded "being social" and "having a life" as necessary components of a social life.)
3) WHY IS MR. HAT THERE? Those last two panels could be the ending to literally any setup.
"So, did you hear about that new Linux distro? I'm thinking about switching." "Yeah, well, -" THUNK
"What's the deal with airplane food, right guys? It's like -" THUNK
"Because of a family illness, instead of regular comics, this week I'll -" THUNK
Actually, that last one might be good.
The point is that Randall has not told a joke. The punchline is completely and totally disconnected from the setup, and therefore neither is contributes to the strip. As a result, 929 is garbage.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:26 AM
10:31 sounds right, but it's hard to believe that Randall would make anyone think and connect ideas, not generally the forte of asspies, to get why the punchline makes sense.ReplyDelete
guys guys you're thinking about 929 ALL WRONGReplyDelete
look, aplarsen has it covered
sheesh it's so OBVIOUS (and so hilarious but that's so trivially true i don't feel the need to point it out)
"I am best in my class at both math and science, 10:16, I think I know xkcd very well. You're just one of those who want to complain about anything even when you find out you're wrong."ReplyDelete
ehh, 4/10.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:16 AM
It's not Randy per se who made me move out of the mathematics field, but the sort of people who are enabled by him.ReplyDelete
Randall scares away people who like science/math by sparking people who substitute cult of personality for acutal science/math.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:18 AM
929 is one of the worst I've seen in a while. It contains zero humour.ReplyDelete
The joke in 929 is that people shouldn't be wasting their time playing basketball (a negro activity), instead they should be finding the cure for breast cancer.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 3:59 AM
Cancer is easy to deal with: screen regularly and remove cancerous tissue. The problem is that there's way more profit in waiting until every illness has progressed enough that the patient is subjected to a long treatment process - this even applies under nationalised healthcare systems where employees, contractors and management still demand clients.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 4:21 AM
But 3:59, how will Randy love her if they hack off her milk tanks? It's not as simple as the perfect world you paint.ReplyDelete
The reality is, if she lost both of her ample bapples to cancer, Randy would leave her cold and alone on the streets of Gotham.
The rumors would spread, and the taint of his love would leave her unwanted.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 4:28 AM
Your concern is honourable, 4:21, but it is quite possible that Megan has not been touched by Randy except through the pulling of hair and suckling of teat. Since the cancer will result in all stained parts falling off, she becomes pure again.ReplyDelete
This may have been her intention.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 4:36 AM
4:28, you have blown my mind.ReplyDelete
I had never even considered that she did not like Randy's loving touch.
It all seems so /OBVIOUS/ now.
He comes home from a stressful day of drawing sticks, maybe he has had a few too many to drink.
He holds her arms, trying to force her hands from defending her ample bosom.
"It's got long sleeves" he says to himself "The bruises will hardly show". In his drunken rage he forces her to the ground, bestial; he pinches and rubs his icy hands over her nipples. As if by magic they begin to perk, her shrill voice screams "No, Rand, No! For God's sake NO!" but by this point he is more animal than man. His tightly pursed lips latch on to her nipple, and Megan's anger is released as pressured milk streams.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 6:10 AM
As a native Southeast Asian, I wholly endorse this clade of mimics.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 6:36 AM
Anders Behring Breivik sure is easy on the eyes, innit?ReplyDelete
It is probably fortuitous that Americans always score lower in maths and science testing versus the 'Arian' Norskis. Otherwise the American Mass Murderers would be as methodical and efficient as those Fjord Feckers appear to be.
catching a ball is a rather trivial actReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 7:36 AM
To catch a baseball, the player should position the glove according to the flight of the ball. If the ball is below the waist, the fingers and the palm of the glove hand should be pointed down with the mitt fully open. If the ball is chest high, the fingers and the palm of the glove should be pointing out, with the thumbs pointing to the sky. If the ball is above the chest, the fingers point toward the sky.In all catching attempts, a player should :ReplyDelete
1. Keep eyes on the ball
2. Have both hands ready, with arms relaxed and extended towards the ball
3. Bend the elbows to absorb the force of the throw
4. Watch the ball into the glove and squeeze it.
5. After the catch, the player should immediately grip the ball with the throwing hand in the correct overhand throwing technique.
Trivial? My tight arse!
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 7:47 AM
Do XKCD characters always pull crossbows out of their asses? And, what the fuck; is black hat examining a pile of shit? What is meant by "it was hard enough getting them on Facebook"? As if these characters (or the author) had anything to do with widespread use?ReplyDelete
Maybe I'm a bit naive about this whole social networking thing (because I have never used a social network), but is online interaction now considered "social" (panel 2). Or am I mistaken?
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 8:01 AM
Anonymous @ 7:47 said:ReplyDelete
"....Maybe I'm a bit naive about this whole social networking thing (because I have never used a social network)...."
Perhaps if you 'used' more personal hygiene products and abstained from the improper use of brackets when writing social networks would more readily embrace your inclusion?
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 8:21 AM
Dear Aquarians,ReplyDelete
You are turning into a Grammar Nazi who has appalling grammar. Please go back to your old ways. I feel you are not even trying any more.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 8:41 AM
Dearest Anon,ReplyDelete
What are/were my old ways?
I 'try' only for those who remunerate me - at my Pay Site for instance. You cunts get my 'Beta' versions.
Did I use the word 'Beta' correctly there?
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 8:47 AM
No, Aquarians, using more personal hygiene products does not mask the underlying problem of not washing correctly.ReplyDelete
Now we know why you have no friends.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 9:04 AM
I must admit I do exude a redolent olfactory assault on the unwary but, my lack of friends is incumbent mostly upon my personality and lolling tongue.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 9:40 AM
There's also my alphabet's worth of Hep infections to consider as well.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 10:17 AM
don't forget your numerous physical disfigurements! they make you look repulsive!ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 10:21 AM
ALTF, would you please take the comma in 9:04 and put it in 8:01. You write like scholarship candidate at prep school destined only for a minor exhibition.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 10:27 AM
You forgot the question mark, 10:21. Unforgivable!ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 10:40 AM
I pixelate like a person who is learning English as her fourth language. My mother tongue does not use punctuation - as you would define it - and my second and third languages, though Romance, have different punctuation rules.ReplyDelete
I will translocate the comma, as per your request, if you insert the necessary indefinite article in 10:21.
Scholarship candidate?
You silver-tongued bounder!
Anonymous 10:27,
A question mark is not needed. 10:21 is making a declarative statement - I think.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 10:55 AM
Actually 10:21, the definite article would suffice as well.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:13 AM
Now your quip is relevant 10:27.ReplyDelete
Can you please forgive though?
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:15 AM
Which of your Romance languages are you claiming to have confused English with? I'd hazard a guess that Spanish is one you're up on but that wouldn't explain your error. Neither would French. And Latin, of course, would just laugh. Perhaps Portuguese has some oddities...? (It's easy for a Hispanophone to read but sounds worse than Catalan!)ReplyDelete
captcha: mongshid. And so ALTF was cast out from the Mongshid tribe, forced onto a canoe and floated into the Pacific. Bumping into the Andes several weeks later, she subsisted on potatoes and bad grammar until a Canadian diplomat selected her for his harem.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:23 AM
ALTF here to fuck everything up again it seems.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:43 AM
929 : Social networks, my mom, AOL sucks, old social networks, black hat guy is mean and nasty.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:45 AM
The word 'canoe' is of Arawak/Carib origin via Spanish and French - we've no canoes in the Motherland! I escaped on a traditional Myanmar teak boat down the Ayeyarwaddy river to the Andaman Sea; Straight of Malacca; Java, Banda and Arfura Seas until traversing the Torres Straight and reaching the Pacific.ReplyDelete
I earned a few bob fellating Brit expats in Phi Phi and Singapore on the way.
I do like a bit of Pomme de Terre though.
BP a Canadian Diplomat?
Anonymous @ 11:23,
As per your request!
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:46 AM
Does anyone actually use Facebook for anything serious? I always assumed that it was just a way of dicking around under random personas, like this blog or pretty much anywhere on the general Internet.ReplyDelete
This said, how the hell does Facebook make money? Put another way, who is stupid enough to buy marketing data from people who are behaving as above?
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:51 AM
If I didn't think you were trolling I'd say you were a complete fucking idiot. And there's a part of me that is terrified that you're serious. There's no reason to interpret this comic as a math joke; just because you can find a way two things are ever so slightly connected doesn't mean that the connection was an intentional decision of the author.
Also, you're just wrong. If the mimic octopi (suck it Randall!) are meant to be "variables", whether you have one or two or a million is irrelevant without additional information. On their own, 'X' and 'X+N' are equally meaningless.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:54 AM
With which of my Romance languages am I confusing English? (Notice I do not end my sentences with prepositions like some people do!)ReplyDelete
I am learning English which is Germanic - there is no confusion with French or Spanish.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 11:57 AM
No canoes in Burma? What are you smoking?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:01 PM
Anonymous @ 11:46 said:ReplyDelete
"...This said, how the hell does Facebook make money?...."
No understanding of commerce, eh?
When the Facebook IPO manifests, in early 2012 I reckon, many new multi-billionaires will be created - instantly!
@ Anonymous 11:57,
They are not called canoes you ignaorant cunt!
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:02 PM
I'm smoking salmon!ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:03 PM
ALTF, you said: "I pixelate like a person who is learning English as her fourth language. My mother tongue does not use punctuation - as you would define it - and my second and third languages, though Romance, have different punctuation rules."ReplyDelete
If this were one of those inane aptitude tests, the multiple choice answer to the question, "Why did ALTF comment that her second and third languages have different punctuation rules?" would be something like, "As a poor excuse for getting English punctuation wrong."
While I'm here, the linguist's counterargument to, "Don't end English sentences with prepositions!" is, of course, to point out that English is Germanic. Bravo.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:11 PM
They are canoes thus properly called canoes. You're not about to go all French and claim that it's not champagne unless it was made in Champagne, are you? Fairly sure the Arawak haven't made that claim.ReplyDelete
As to the IPO creating new multi-billionaires... what? The paper valuation of the major owners is already in the billions, figures which will remain as meaningful after the IPO pump.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:25 PM
Niggers will be niggers, July 25, 2011 12:11 PM.ReplyDelete
There is nothing you can do about it.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:36 PM
@ Anonymous 12:03 said:ReplyDelete
"...."As a poor excuse for getting English punctuation wrong."...."
It wasn't that poor. I thought it contained a certain pseudo-intellectual sleight-of-hand or legerdemain if you will sufficient to keep the natives in awe.
"...to point out that English is Germanic. Bravo....."
You picked up on that! Good for you.
And as I am female, I should think one would say 'Brava'.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:42 PM
@ Anonymous 12:11,ReplyDelete
About the canoes
Sometimes a canoe is just a canoe.
".....You're not about to go all French and claim that it's not champagne unless it was made in Champagne, are you?...."
Would you like me to? I've a cute French Maid's outfit ideal for just such occasions.
Frilly knickers and everything!
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:44 PM
I prefer plain and subtle, but thanks for offering.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:46 PM
@12:36 Nope. "Bravo" is qualifying the act, not the person.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:50 PM
Plain and subtle?ReplyDelete
Do you ask them to take a very, very cold shower first and then request that they repose on the bed and remain very, very still until you're finished?
That's gotta be dead boring.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:55 PM
Nah, RealDoll[tm]s are a pain to clean. The ladies at the local library, on the other hand...ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 12:58 PM
So the act of stating English is Germanic, which allows for terminal preposition placement, and then chastising folks for placing these horrid prepositions in the terminal position when writing in English and then not recognising the contradiction inherrent in holding these two mutually exclusive beliefs at the same time is Bravo?ReplyDelete
And I am not Brava?
Fie I say!
A most heinous disapprobation!
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:06 PM
The intentionality (in the Husserlian sense) of the juxtaposition was bravo.ReplyDelete
My next sentence was going to involve the phrase "ridden like a small Italian car" - in undeference to Randall I'll just put tasteless filler around it.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:11 PM
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:13 PM
And one big fucking Oooops!
Read "@ Anonymous 12:55" above.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:17 PM
A north minnesotan diplomat. If such a thing exists.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:21 PM
But it is an anagram of "refence nude", about the only time you should put something on, and very hard not to type as "reference nude", undoubtedly the thought of Caine's character in Educating Rita at the fresh start of each new year to keep him attentive for at least the first few weeks. Fucking brilliant film, that. Not to be confused with Rita, Sue and Bob Too which should be searched for using Youtube to give the completion "film car scene", referring to the clumsy underage sex scene and reminding us what a sordid place the Internet really is (and how good Google is at indexing it).ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:22 PM
Had a problem there.ReplyDelete
I made a few buboes.
Shit Minnesota Slim is back.
I liked Caine in "The Man Who Would Be King".ReplyDelete
Educating Rita is good too! Great similarity with Fucking Aquarians and me.
When I met her 6 years ago, she could barely articulate crude grunts and "Me want Snoo snoo" was the extent of her verbiage in English.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:42 PM
No one ever heard me utter the phrase, "Him do good snoo snoo" in reference to you did they?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:43 PM
Not another anaesthesiologist, I hope? You'd think they'd need to read some English as part of their training...ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:49 PM
@ Anonympous 1:21 PMReplyDelete
"....reminding us what a sordid place the Internet really is...."
As sordid places go, it's one of the best though.
I am not a gas-passer my friend. The only English I really need to know is "You pay. Now!"
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 1:54 PM
At prep school I had a crush on an Indian girl. She ended up training as a gas passer.ReplyDelete
At sixth form I had a crush on a German girl. She ended up training as a gas passer. (Now off on a voluntary mission which let her see the first sunrise on South Sudan - enough Internet detective work'll allow you to work out who she is and who I am.)
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:04 PM
"....At sixth form I had a crush on a German girl. She ended up being a gas passer...."ReplyDelete
Was it Zyklon B? You know, her being German and all.
Tell her to avoid the cunts at MSF in future volunteer missions. Going rogue she'll be far more useful to the locals.
I know of what I speak.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:14 PM
She was quite friendly with the daughters of Abraham our school was (for reorganisational reasons - I guess they're not all accountants?) Gift-ed with at the time.ReplyDelete
Perhaps she was fitting in the experimentation before a discovered indiscretion would affect her career prospects.
MSF likes to draw its own F.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:26 PM
"MSF likes to draw its own F"ReplyDelete
BP's accountant is a Scot - go figure? I do not need one - yet.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:44 PM
I think I would spend a little longer on Skye were it not full of bored drunks and City refugees. Quite different from First World Britain.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 2:50 PM
"....Perhaps she was fitting in the experimentation before a discovered indiscretion would affect her career prospects...."ReplyDelete
Funny guy!
Though I reckon she'd have an easy time of it in Nordic countries - especially if her indiscretions are discovered.
First World Britain?
Are you having a laugh?
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 3:02 PM
Are you having a laugh?ReplyDelete
In British English, the most clearly phrased statement is the least sincere.
- AnonymousJuly 25, 2011 at 3:02 PM
Well the guest posts ruined the blog and now ALTF has ruined the comment threads, I guess I'll just go back to seething about xkcd on my own now.ReplyDelete
Anon302, who are you kidding? This blog was ruined the moment it was conceived.ReplyDelete
Anon 3:02, if you're looking for an alternative, there's always the XKCD SUCKS blog (run by yours truly).ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 26, 2011 at 12:50 AM
"Anon 3:02, if you're looking for an alternative, there's always the XKCD SUCKS blog (run by yours truly)."ReplyDelete
It's true! That blog is like this one, only without the sense of irony, the humor, the understanding, or Rob's 'like I give a fuck' attitude. Also, the posts there are twice as long as the ones here, which means they are twice as good.
12:50 and OP = samefagsReplyDelete
12:50 and Rob = samefagsReplyDelete
that's what i just said dude stop cribbing my styleReplyDelete
Oh, THAT kind of OP.ReplyDelete
I guess I'm used to forums where everything is this "comments," so the OP is just the first "commenter."
That'll teach me.
maybe if you were less fatReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 26, 2011 at 1:17 AM
Gamer's neckbeard has reached a higher, more psychedelic plane, resdistributing his weight.ReplyDelete
Yeah, Rob, get it right. YOU'RE that fat one; I'M the one with the neckbeard.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 26, 2011 at 2:52 AM
neck beard avec liceReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 26, 2011 at 11:54 AM
you don't get it. the joke is not "oh, didn't see that one coming, did you?" More specifically, it's funny because all the other pictures were obviously something else, but then labeled as "mimic octopuses" since they take the shape of anything. Then, in the last one, you see what is obviously an octopus, and is it an octupus? Nope. It's /two/ mimic octopuses/pode/piReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 26, 2011 at 1:35 PM
@11:54: Search "US AIR FORCE AIRCRAFT IDENTIFICATION CHART" about, oh, a decade or so ago. That is the joke.ReplyDelete


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A house that requires the entire interior to be rebuilt.
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A piece of property that is owned by one person but provides housing for up to four households.
Two-step mortgage
An adjustable mortgage with two interest rates, one for the first five or seven years of the loan, and the other for the remainder of the loan term.


text:
Foresight Archives
Foresight Update 38
A publication of the Foresight Institute
Foresight Update 38
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text:
Monday, June 7, 2010
Get Out of My Head: A Guest Post
:carefully places soapbox, performs a few vocal exercises:
Welcome. We all hate xkcd the comic for obvious reasons: it's poorly drawn, badly written, and more often than not forgets to include a joke (sorry Randall, but referencing Firefly != punchline). And lordy do we love (hate) our cuddlefish- those few brave souls who leave the warm, comforting realm of the xkcd forums to try to defend the motherland from her invader. All glory to Comrade Munroe! But one section of the xkcd "phenomenon" (I just threw up a little in my mouth when I typed that) that we so loathe- which I feel lies under-addressed- is the fanboys themselves. The fanboys, and their many infuriating habits. My humble rant, which I submit to you, deals in this topic. It deals with what is to me the most utterly irritating, most emblematic symptom of xkcdfandom: the declaration of GOOMH.
GOOMH, or Get Out Of My Head, is about the closest an xkcdfanboy can get to literally kissing Randall's ass without... well, literally kissing his ass. Why? Get Out Of My Head is what you say when somebody expresses a perspective, observation, or conclusion about a person or situation that, until then, you had previously thought was only yours. It's actually (when applied properly) quite a high compliment to somebody who has an audience with which he communicates, because it accurately reflects the strength with which the author can effectively identify with his audience (and vice versa).
The problem is, of course, that the xkcdfanboys DON'T apply it properly. At least, not anymore. Maybe waaaay back when, in the days when the "My Hobby" comics were grounded in reality, and weren't just shoddily constructed deposits of mental diarrhea (for an example of that, see this comic). But now the fanboys, in their rush to suck Randall's ego's dick, have taken it too far, and stripped the declaration of all of its meaning. Nowadays, the most accurate definition of "GOOMH" as used by the typical xkcd forumite is something like this:
- If given comic X touches upon, references, or pokes fun at, no matter how tangentially, something you enjoy/were thinking about within the past month/raped you as a child, Randall is in your head and you must order him to leave it.
And so we get the childish tripe that so often peppers the landscape of the xkcd forums, of people seeing Randall envision Hell as a tetris game with a curved bottom, remembering that they played tetris on their DS two days previously, and chiming in to say "GOOMH randall lololol".
But it's not just a matter of stroking Randall's epeen, that motivates the forumites to wrongly invoke this phrase so often. No, GOOMH is a beautiful thing- it's a gift that gives to everyone! Not only does a True Believer make Randall feel good by thinking "Hey, I have a great connection with my audience, I'm hot shit" when they whisper GOOMH into his ear, they also get to enjoy a shiver of pleasure themselves-- feeling they've ascended to a hive-mind. To use an incredibly nerdy parallel that most people may not get (because it's brought up in the novels, and AFAIK most Magic players don't read the novels), it's like the members of the Izzet guild's devotion to Niv-Mizzet. To be able to proudly proclaim "GOOMH, Randall!" is to them the equivalent of being touched by the Firemind. It's an almost orgasmic joy, that they now have a special connection to the godlike Randall that you lowly peons don't (and FUCK YOU for it!). It's become a cult, whose initiation ritual is both a supplication to the Overlord and a personal stroke job as well. Except, again, they don't reserve it for the times when it might matter. Take, for example, this comic. It might be proper to declare "GOOMH" if the reader in question had attended a cemetery that very day and seen something similar unfold. But instead you get forumites so eager for that Near-God Experience they declare GOOMH just because they've seen people use bluetooth headsets in public before.
Why, though, does this piss me off so much more than all the other shit we put up with? Why is it more irritating to me than the near-constant vandalism of wikipedia, the failed attempts at memes (I'll tell you where you can stick your stupid fucking HI JOEE and HI GLASNTs, you little snotbags), the frankly disturbing fascination with self-diagnoses of asperger's and autism, or the ever-present suckiness of the comic itself? I'll tell you why. It fucking pisses me off because it makes ALL OF THOSE PROBLEMS WORSE. It entrenches Randall even more in his misguided conclusions that he's still making a quality comic, it makes the fandom amongst forumites much more extreme by creating and perpetuating a cult status, and ensures that no matter how terrible the comics he makes, Randall can always count on one or two of his yes-men hopping on to his forums ready to pamper him by convincing him it's the greatest thing since Richard Stallman (ourfatherwhoartinheavenhallowedbehisname).
In short, I really truly honestly believe that the root, or one of the chief roots, of most of the aspects of xkcd that this community (and sane people everywhere) absolutely despise, is in the sheer unenlightened misapplied kissassery of "GOOMH".
Needless to say, Ves is wrong on one count: the closest you can get to literally kissing a person's ass without literally kissing that person's ass is to kiss that person's pants.
IN OTHER NEWS it is very old news by now but earlier today the Perry Bible Fellowship updated again! For the first time in a long time. Here's the new comic. Note also that the previous comic - the "we demand that you be funny, all the time, no matter what" comic - is missing.
all the excitement aside, I think the new one is pretty lame - you completely cannot tell what is happening in the last panel. Also, "orbit" is a terrible euphemism for sex - seriously, it means to go around something for a while without touching it. the end.
44 comments:
- AnonymousJune 7, 2010 at 8:29 PM
Regarding the PBF comic- The last panel shows two astronauts planting the American flag on the moon. Presumably the moon has caught Earth's disease- either humanity in general, or Americans in particular. Either way, I think it's pretty funny.ReplyDelete
- jogiffJune 7, 2010 at 9:02 PM
It took me a while to get the most recent PBF because I thought the astronauts were tiny arms and the flag was a rose. I thought it was kind of funny to show the moon with tiny, tiny arms reaching out for a hug from Earth, but not funny enough to use as the first new PBF in a year (I think it was a year). Then I looked closer and realized that it astronauts. That was pretty funny, I thought.ReplyDelete
Also, I doubt that the disease was Americans or even humanity in particular, it was probably life in general.
- AnonymousJune 7, 2010 at 10:09 PM
I got that the joke was that humanity is a disease. Too bad The Matrix beat PBF to that one by 11 years.ReplyDelete
"(Z->)90° - (E-N²W)90°t=1"ReplyDelete
It's not a euphemism, Carl. It's more like... a metaphor, I guess. Either way, it's meant that orbiting is a planet's way of having sex.ReplyDelete
The joke is good, but poorly executed. Mostly because those astronauts do NOT look like astronauts until you look at it reeeeally closely.
Also, lawl at the first poster's blatant racism!
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 3:36 AM
Anyone mind explaining/linking to what "hi joee" and "hi glasnt" mean? I never visit the xkcd forums.ReplyDelete
when joe or glanst on the xkcd forums appear the next pos is inevitably "HI JOEEE" or the alternate.ReplyDelete
It annoys me because it's sort of like a dilute version of GOOMH, and elevates two posters above the rest.
Also- I never thought of the 'jeepers' pbf like that. CARL, Y U SO INSITEFUL
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 4:23 AM
Unrelated, but I've been thinking lately - like some others who frequent this blog, I quite like Dinosaur Comics. I find that most people I know in real life don't seem to get it at all, and I'm generally at a loss to explain what's so funny about it. Since it's so easy for us to rip apart pretty much every lousy xkcd that comes our way, why doesn't somebody apply the same critical analysis to a favoured Dinosaur Comic to justify the love?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 4:29 AM
Well said Ves, my thoughts exactly.ReplyDelete
I mean, GOOMHV!
Seriously though why is xkcdsucks covered in pencils and spanners?
I got the latest PBF straight away. Maybe everyone is using really tiny screens? Or I have stronger lenses in my glasses than I thought ...ReplyDelete
Either way, even though "humanity as a virus" has been done to death, "humanity as an STD" cracked me up :)
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 6:48 AM
Carl, no matter what you say, you must remember this: not everyone loves you, and you must die.ReplyDelete
- AlsworthJune 8, 2010 at 6:53 AM
But... Carl is already dead...ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 7:32 AM
I really had to get a closer look to get the last panel(those astronauts are really tiny), but I do like it.ReplyDelete
Awesome words, Ves. Awesome words...
- locke9000June 8, 2010 at 11:12 AM
Nicely put. The 'My Hobby' comics used to be mildly entertaining, as they were often suggestions of things you could actually do to fuck with various types of assholes and pharisees, or what Maddox on his blog often referred to as the "pseudo-intellectuals." (One memorable xkcd example is to properly employ the verbal sense of effect to trip up amateur grammar nazis.) Seeing as by now, a large part of Munroe's fan-base probably consists largely in pseudo-intellectuals, he is softening the edge of his humor, and so it seems like nowadays the only group he goes after is the MSM. But we have The Daily Show for that.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 11:31 AM
The new PBF comic is merely ok. It's like a PBF version of the joke about babies being the worst STD you can get. Not a strong one to put up after a year of non-comics. Maybe he just needs to get back into the groove.ReplyDelete
The art in the last panel hurt it a bit, too. Would have been nice to have the astronauts be a bit larger/more recognizable.
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 11:36 AM
XKCD fans who say GOOMH should be called goomhbas.ReplyDelete
- scottmctonyJune 8, 2010 at 11:39 AM
I read the PBF at school and didn't get it at first. If I'd been at home I suspect it would have been incredibly easy though. Carl how shitty is your monitor?ReplyDelete
captcha - drquity. i don't know what to say
A good example of what was a true GOOMH was Comic 245. In fact, it's probably the best example. Also note the low low number. XKCD had some pretty good moments back then. Why was this one a true GOOMH though? The comic was about a person who was walking strangely on floor tiles according to his own set of rules he made up in his head. When confronted on his strange walking, he claims he's not walking funny, and presumably the pair move on without saying anything more about this. The reason why this is the best example of GOOMH is that the experience of walking strangely, and then denying it for fear of embarrassment, is one that MUST be had alone! If you were truly afraid of embarrassment, you wouldn't speak about this to anyone else (or possibly you'd just forget about the event) making you feel like you might be the only one. When Randal then writes 245 you are shocked to discover you are not the only one who does this. That's a real GOOMH moment.ReplyDelete
I also think that it's a good example of what made XKCD so popular. Back in the day, Randal really did just write about things that happened in his life. I don't find it hard to believe that 245 was a true event. It was one of those little tidbits of life that you don't share with everyone, so when someone else writes about it, you feel a connection. Now, rather than writing comics about little life events that he has actually had, he writes about little life events that he IMAGINES happening, or that he IMAGINES would be funny. Probably because no one has enough of those cute little moments to write 3 comics a week on.
Captcha: Nomin - That Burger was nomin!
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 12:53 PM
GET OUT OF MY HEAD Gurewitch!ReplyDelete
Rinnon: Yeah, that's GOOMH. A cute little "Hey that thing I did that I thought was so idiosyncratic, turns out it's a common thing!"ReplyDelete
Now the word's been bastardised into...well, what Ves said.
New PBF? I laughed. I thought it was going to be a straightforward obvious joke when I first glanced at the three panels so the fact that I had to give it a think made me laugh. (Maybe because I didn't try to figure out "what is that depicted on the moon?" but "what could it in theory be?", so the way I approached it required class PBF figuring-it-out, but I can get if you just tried to identify the image it'd be not so funny :\).
Where's the parrot diarrhea comment? That moved me in so many ways..ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 5:29 PM
the PBF comic would work a lot better if the original orientation/scale of the moon and earth were preserved... also if they were more clearly the moon/earth and not just generic planets.ReplyDelete
lol @ somebody posting as niv-mizzetReplyDelete
PBF comic: IMHO, it was kind of lame. "Ha ha, celestial bodies are sentient and they think of humans as undesirable residents" has been done so many times [insert your own clever analogy/metaphor here]
also I for one would also like to see the parakeet diarrhea rant posted, if just for the inevitably entertaining title such a post would bear.ReplyDelete
I really should give credit on the Catchphrase comic to the people on reddit (where I went to figure out what the joke was on the new one).ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 6:51 PM
@Ves Frankly, with XKCD always talking about the Geek and other comics always talking about people, I think that any comic that just leaves humans beside and makes jokes about the billions of other things in this world, it will better. I think that is one of the major successes of Dinosaur Comics. People are tired of peopleReplyDelete
one reason I like dinosaur comics is that ryan north always comes up with clever ways to have natural sounding conversations and scenes within the incredibly difficult confines of the same six panels every day. The fact that it is the same six panels makes it much, much harder to write, and, when done well, much more enjoyable to read.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 7:40 PM
On the subject of the fanboys, this article from the Onion reminded me severely of xkcd's fandom.ReplyDelete
I liked the latest PBF. His ability to draw means he can make a wordless final panel instead of having to rely on stilted dialog to set up a punchline, like in XKCD. It was better than the "catchphrase" comic, at least.ReplyDelete
I also immediately saw that the guy was an astronaut. Maybe you guys need your eyes checked.
The only complaint I have is that the moon has orbited earth since before humans existed (and in fact it has been speculated that life itself would not exist without the formation of tidal pools). But then again, planets can't talk, so I guess it's a bit silly to nitpick.
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 9:00 PM
Rinnon, nice catch! You're being awesome, as usual! =DReplyDelete
I'll take from where you left and make a silly connection here: you know how Randall is writing about moments he imagines he had, and that he imagines would be funny? Well, Randall is living life like if it was Family Guy. You just have to add a panel saying "This is more [adjective] than that time when [absurd situation that might or might not relate to whatever happened right then]" before any strip. I know someone did it for that Inspector Gadget comic.
Mole out. I forgot to say it last time, so I'll say it again.
Mole out.
Ves, you're such an idiot, there are hardly words to describe you. However, I will make an attempt: baby-anal-fucker. Can you identify one single post where this is said??ReplyDelete
- AlsworthJune 8, 2010 at 9:46 PM
Found one: http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=60242#p2143625ReplyDelete
Oh, hey, look, found another in a different thread: http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=59967#p2132584
You are either a horrible troll, or you just have no idea what you are talking about.
- AnonymousJune 8, 2010 at 10:21 PM
What with a new blog post up, I'm not sure if anyone will see this, but it seems like you're judging the entire fora based off of the Individual Comics Threads forum. People on the rest of the fora kinda...don't like those people. Joee and glansts aren't really elevated either.ReplyDelete
Yeah, that seems pretty common for webcomic forums.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 9, 2010 at 6:00 AM
Anonymous I think you mean "the rest fororum". "fora" isn't genitive, please get your endings right.ReplyDelete
You know you've made it on the internets when you get your own fantrolls. I'm just so lucky that mine is as awesome as you, Petroc. You're the best a guy could hope for, you know that?ReplyDelete
You're stunningly articulate- even when you can't come up with anything to dispute my statement, the creativity and eloquence with which you state your displeasure of me is simply breathtaking. I'm so much of an idiot that I'm a baby-anal-fucker? My god man, that's prose that would make Chaucer jealous!
Aside from your linguistic prowess, you are amazingly intelligent. Only a true idiot-- or, as you so artfully might say, a baby-anal-fucker-- would challenge someone to make them look like a complete dumbass with the employment of a single link! Fortunately, you're far too smart an individual to fall into that trap, which means I'm forced to dissect a competently made argument instead of just throwing links at you
Thanks for the laughs, man.
@anon 10:21: I think it's pretty well understood this (and most of the issues people take with xkcdites in general) is aimed specifically at the individual comics thread posters. I mean, if people were going around blabbering "GOOMH Randall" anywhere else, that'd be really disturbing.
New PBF, yessssssssReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 9, 2010 at 8:31 AM
What is this parakeet dihorreah rant? I MUST SEE IT?ReplyDelete
Capcha- Judish. I'd make an anti-semitic joke, but it'd be offensive to the judish
- AnonymousJune 9, 2010 at 10:08 AM
Anonymous (who made the "the rest fororum" joke above), thank you deeply. I sincerely wish the internet had more people like you.ReplyDelete
In other news, people who use the word "fora" can go impale themselves on a palm tree.
- AnonymousJune 9, 2010 at 3:09 PM
PARRAKET DIOHROEAAH RANT!!!ReplyDelete
Is it too much to ask for?
- AnonymousJune 9, 2010 at 4:42 PM
- AnonymousJune 10, 2010 at 11:53 AM
GOOMH petroc i was anally fucking a baby just last nightReplyDelete
- AnonymousSeptember 9, 2010 at 5:57 PM
it is a race and we're winningReplyDelete