text:
Hi Jeffrey
My soon-to-be husband (second marriages for us both) and I were in the Niagara Region this past fall daydreaming about one day owning a country place to escape the city.
The next thing I knew, Doug and I were in a realtor's office looking at properties. Quick to follow was our December close on a century-old house. We're not kids and in fact both of our families are grown and out of our respective houses. He has a house, I have a house and now we have our house. All of this is to say we don't want our weekend place (that will eventually transition into our retirement home) to look fuddy-duddy and country. We love that we have purchased an historical home but want the interior to be fresh and vibrant. Any ideas?
Thank you,
Hi Barb,
When I do an impulse weekend purchase it's on a much less expensive item than a house (think jeans, maybe a pair of shoes). Considering you were in Niagara, I assume there was wine involved?
I'm showing you a photo of a room designed by Boston interior designer Jill Goldberg (hudsoninteriordesigns.com). Jill opened her home-furnishings boutique, Hudson, in 2006 and from that came her full-service residential design firm in 2010.
Where I grew up in Nova Scotia, we would have referred to the room pictured as the "back room." It was much more relaxed than the "front room," in which no one ever sat. That lesson aside, this room has the design essence I want you to incorporate in your home in order to achieve a fresh, vibrant look. In the words of Hudson Interiors: "traditional, country and vintage meets modern."
I love this living room because there is no mistaking it's in an historical home, yet it looks classically current. Grass cloth wall covering has made a comeback in the last couple of years, and used above the chair rail (which we typically consider traditional), provides this room a vintage component. I also think of a fabric-draped accent table covered in photos as a traditional decor standard, but when the table is covered in burlap and has a mercury glass lamp on it, it takes on an entirely different feel.
The chrome coffee table and goat-hide-covered stools sitting on top of a bound sisal rug add to the modern feel of the room. And although the fireplace is large, its mantel is slim, which adds character without taking up a lot of space.
So that we don't forget we're in the country, Ms. Goldberg has thrown in a couple of vintage red stools and an old oil painting that looks as if she found them on a weekend of antiquing. And take notice of the shell candle sconces. All of these details add to the overall success of this room. I bet if you searched Doug's house and yours, you'd have a treasure trove of things to take to the country. Though remember it's not a dumping ground for the things neither of you want in your city homes.
The sofa (you can see more of it on the Hudson website) and tub chairs aren't fussy furniture pieces and the upholstery keeps them looking current and not fuddy-duddy. The sofa is slip-covered in a solid oatmeal colour and the two chairs in a beautiful graphic fretwork pattern. Ms. Goldberg chose a different fretwork pattern for the roman blinds, and by keeping all the fabrics transitional/modern, she has avoided the country feel you also wish to sidestep. If you repurpose furniture from your present homes, be sure to recover them in fabrics that don't look old-fashioned - and don't forget a pop of colour!
I think if you take this photo as inspiration for your new home, it will serve you well. Keep 75% of each room's contents looking transitional and the other 25% with antique or traditional elements and you'll find your rooms have the desired freshness without completely turning your back on the historical past of your new purchase.
Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming nuptials.
Send your design question to email@example.com


text:
Well, with no meth and the cars own fuel system (with High Pressure Fuel Pump tweaks courtesy of Vargas Turbo Tech) responsible for all the fueling 673 wheel horsepower was achieved in STD correction on a Dynojet. That is a record for horsepower on the platform without methanol injection and was done with a blend of MS109 fuel and 93 octane.
Meth injection was then added and the figures rose to 693 wheel horsepower. If more time was available for the parties involved including Josh at Cobb as well as Jake and Dzeeno at ProTuning Freaks the 700 wheel barrier likely would have been crossed. This will happen sooner rather than later now but this is still a major milestone and a new era the N54 is entering. The motor is finally starting to mature and although it is not on a comparable power level yet with the top BMW aftermarket options this is a huge step step forward for a platform that spent considerable time in limbo due to fueling and tuning issues.
It must be satisfying for all involved especially Vargas Turbo who was doubted by many early on due to being a fresh entrant on the N54 tuning scene with many fanboys blindly following another tuner providing a turbo upgrade. Vargas Turbo Tech, Cobb, and PTF have surprisingly quickly surpassed the results from a competing turbo kit that uses a single turbo setup and have done so without relying on meth injection band-aids. A true fueling upgrade is here as well as a turbo upgrade making some serious power and setting the standard.
Congratulations and much respect to all the parties involved, dyno graphs and videos are below.
693WHP 572WTQ Graph:
693 WHP 572WTQ Graph 0 Smoothing:
Back to back no meth / meth run
673WHP 564WTQ no meth / 680WHP 556WTQ
A few runs stacked to see how consistent the car is:
693WHP 572WTQ with speed to prove it was in 4th gear:
Octane Calculator pic:
693WHP 572WTQ Pull video:
Back to back no meth / meth run:

subset: commoncrawl


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Posted on December 14, 2011
9:30 am - 4 pm
General Reading Room (second floor)
Christina Bannon, Registrar of the Chicago Chapter of the DAR, will be on hand at the Newberry to provide lookups in the DAR's database and to offer advice on the application process. As a Genealogy Consultant with the DAR, Christina focuses on improving the quality of applications submitted and has recruited over 40 women into DAR membership this year.
Christina will be available in the second floor General Reading Room between 9:30 am and 4 pm. Appointments are not required. If you don't have a current Newberry reader's card, stop at the third floor to obtain one. Ask at the circulation or genealogy reference desks for Christina's location.


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Willard Water is a modified form of water produced from regular water to which the catalyst micelle has been added resulting in catalyst altered water. The altered molecular structure of Willard Water gives it the amazing increased ability to absorb more nutrients, eliminate toxins and wastes, scavenge free radicals and become a powerful antioxidant, reduce swelling, help eliminate skin and ear issues, raise the body's alkalinity and more!
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text:
Covered by Houston's local NBC affiliate KPRC, a UPS delivery man decided it would be a brilliant idea to steal an iPad Mini off the doorstep of a home in North Harris county. The Apple tablet had been delivered at the home of Al Alverson at 9:45 a.m. by a FedEx delivery man. Since Apple requires a signature on delivery, Alverson had left a pre-signed delivery form taped to the front of the house authorizing the driver to leave the package by the front door. Alverson had ordered the iPad Mini for his daughter as a Christmas present and wanted to make sure the tablet was delivered in time for the holiday.
Just before 2:00 p.m., an unnamed UPS delivery man arrived at Alverson's home to deliver a package. The security camera mounted above Alverson's front door captured video of the UPS delivery man taking a closer look at the FedEx package before ringing the doorbell and walking away.
After waiting a few minutes to see if anyone answered the door, the UPS delivery man returned and picked up the FedEx package. The UPS delivery man looked at the package for a moment pretending to check the label and walked back to his truck.
Alverson contacted UPS over the phone to complain about the theft, but felt like he was "getting the run around" by the people handling the claim according to an interview with KHOU News. After posting the video footage to YouTube and Vimeo on Wednesday night, Alverson was quickly visited by a local deputy as well as a UPS investigator on Thursday morning.
UPS officials easily tracked down the thief based off the delivery records and fired him immediately for stealing the tablet. According to UPS, the delivery man was hired as a seasonal employee to help with the increase in package volume during the holidays. A new iPad Mini was delivered to Alverson on late Thursday courtesy of UPS and he removed the video from both YouTube and Vimeo. However, several mirrors of the security footage have been posted online. According to KHOU News, the delivery man was arrested by the Harris County Sheriff's Office and charged with theft.


text:
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Comic 918: A Public Service Announcement
[Comic title: "Google+"; alt text: "On one hand, you'll never be able to convince your parents to switch. On the other hand, you'll never be able to convince your parents to switch!"]
Hey, did you hear that Google just launched a social networking thing? Randy did. Apparently he's excited!
86 comments:
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:14 PM
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:15 PM
And I too, xkcd sucks, hate it when people post things late and don't put effort in.ReplyDelete
Or as you would say:
'hate i do'
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:19 PM
yes orkut is awesomeReplyDelete
wait what
maybe when this is my job i will care if you think i need to try harderReplyDelete
What the fuck is wrong with xkcd 919.ReplyDelete
It's like randy had a seizure and just thought of every internetty-word he could think of.
Eh, it's better than a forced joke about lulzsec, but then again lulzsec is still somewhat topical. Maybe in a couple of weeks the great glorious mind of Randall Munroe will pinch out a steamer worthy of consideration on the subject.
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:31 PM
Hey Ves, what's up bro?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:37 PM
Hey, xkcd no longer links to the forums. What's the deal with that?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:44 PM
919: My suspicions confirmed? ALTF is Randall?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:45 PM
"I guess that's all I really wanted."ReplyDelete
What the hell is that supposed to mean?? The writing just gets worse and worse.
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 9:49 PM
9:37; Seeing as the comments are closed for Randy's recent blog-post, perhaps he's trying to prevent his fans from commenting on the fora too?ReplyDelete
That, or, he removed the "Forums" link so people would freak out and click on the Blog to see what's going on, and read about his life. But, I doubt it.
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 10:44 PM
Anonymous @ 9:45: That's a point that's been made elsewhere by non-comic commentators. Google+ is like Facebook without being Facebook, and that's an advantage. You can go onto Google+ and wipe your social networking slate clean without having to deal with friend requests from every single person you have ever met in life.ReplyDelete
You can argue that it's not really funny, but it's a coherent point that people have been making quite a bit over the last few days.
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 10:49 PM
I hadn't heard about Google- actually.ReplyDelete
But as soon as someone brought it up in my workplace's Yammer, 3 or so people immediately linked to xkcd :(
Also 919 is utterly awful.
- AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 11:24 PM
So, just to let you brohams know, only dudes have taints.ReplyDelete
On Facebook, most of my status updates are just me insulting my friendslist to see if anyone will defriend me. For some reason, no one ever does.ReplyDelete
They just hide you, Chaos. I know, because that's what I do with annoying facebook "friends".ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 12:19 AM
Wow, this site's still around, how about that!ReplyDelete
It was good to be reminded that it stopped being good about a year or so into its existence. Oh well.
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 12:59 AM
shut up randallReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 12:59 AM
So, who wants to make fun of Randy's fiancee's (Ha! Like I believe that!) breast cancer?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 1:51 AM
wait, so this is like a website for people who aren't smart enough to get the comic to come together and make themselves feel better by childishly insulting it?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 1:51 AM
Well, that's what happens when you induce lactation by unnatural meansReplyDelete
It's like the forums never even existed. How... ORWELLIAN.ReplyDelete
- SerendipityJuly 1, 2011 at 3:06 AM
@1:51: Exactly right. There is no way that people could understand xkcd and just not find it funny.ReplyDelete
Let's take another example: Randall has a lactation fetish but his basement chattel has breast cancer. That is hilarious and the only reason you might not laugh is that you aren't smart enough to get the connection.
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 4:07 AM
I wish I had a basement chattel. Maybe I should write a nerd-pandering webcomic.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 6:14 AM
Does...does Randall object to the word "panties"? Does he think it's some sort of obnoxious neologism like all the other words in that sentence? Because if he does, it's not. And if he doesn't, why did he include it?ReplyDelete
- Megan's faulty nippleJuly 1, 2011 at 6:17 AM
@6:15: Randall objects to the word "panties" in the sentence, "This chemo makes me really tired so there's no way I'm letting you into my panties."ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 7:01 AM
@Anon 10:44: So Randall is not just making references to technology, he's making references to contemporary commentary that will be forgotten in a matter of weeks. That's what's so bad about #918 - the comic itself is incoherent. There's nothing in it to indicate what exactly Stickman "really wanted" nor how long he has done so. "Facebook but not Facebook" is too vague. More specific advantages, such as the one you and various writers have mentioned, are inapplicable as Stickman doesn't know about them yet. Hell, he's not even sure that whatever he's talking about IS what he wanted.ReplyDelete
It's times like this I just feel like sitting back and cracking a cold one and just letting the inevitable flamewar over Randall's fiancee begin.ReplyDelete
Also, in other news:
Randall Munroe is a Hack, exhibit #919:
- In panel 1, Megan's stick figure is sitting in a chair with no back. And yet in panels 2, 3, and 4, the back mysteriously appears. How... orwellian.
- what the fuck is Stickrandall doing in panel 4? Is he crossing his arms? Is he choking himself? It's times like these you can point to Randall's art being objectively terrible because it's failing in its fundamental task of showing us what the fuck is happening.
I actually liked the hand gesture in the last panel. I don't know what it is, exactly, but it shows just how enthusiastic the guy is.ReplyDelete
Nice catch with the chair, though. I ended up editing my review to include a mention of that (as if we really needed any more evidence that this is the second worst xkcd of all time).
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 8:37 AM
Randall's refusal to acknowledge mistakes and dislike of criticism reminds me of this guy who used to post on the forum I go to. He was a moderator (or maybe an admin) and the other admins liked to occasionally screw with the interface (but usually not in an obnoxious way). People would often joke about how the moderators got their positions pretty arbitrarily and didn't take their jobs seriously and he was always quick to point out that he did constructive stuff. When people would make self-deprecating jokes he would always make comments about how good he was at stuff. Not even fake boasting in a joking manner, just plainly stating stuff he was good at. Whenever anyone would make a joke about him (which wasn't often) he was always quick to point out that their joke wasn't accurate. Whenever someone made a comment implying that he did something wrong (which, again, wasn't often) he would try to change the subject to things he had done right. He never really blew up in anyone's face about it, but he was always just a little too quick to defend himself. It was a subtle thing but you got the feeling that he had deep-seated self-esteem issues.ReplyDelete
- Zeno of EleaJuly 1, 2011 at 8:44 AM
@8:37: It's hard to find anyone in the "somewhat but not really very smart" category who is not like that. As people get smarter there is this peak where they're clever enough to realising their shortcomings but not good enough to overcome them. After that, people become genuinely brilliant and let their work speak for itself.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 10:00 AM
"In #919 we see pathetic loser Randy trying to get to Megan's nipples again by whining a bunch of vaguely sexual nonsense at her, which predictably drives her crazy until she's screaming for it to stop. This has been happening in real life, and Randy still doesn't accept that it's a rejection."ReplyDelete
There, that's your xkcdsucks-style review for tomorrow. Pad it out with a few more expressions how xkcd is shit and it's hit a new low etc.
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 10:05 AM
I... I really don't get 919. Someone, please explain.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 10:07 AM
"I've also spent a lot of these eight months immersed in cancer science, and I want to be free to talk (and draw comics) about stuff I'm learning..."ReplyDelete
I really hope Randy is gonna start making cancer jokes. Can't go wrong with cancer jokes!
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 10:28 AM
Anon@6:14 & Anon@10:05ReplyDelete
It's a list of words that a large number of people purportedly find obnoxious. Many of them are neologisms, but not all of them are. Moist is infamous as a "gross" word (there's a possibly apocryphal story about a college student threatening a sexual harassment suit against her professor for saying moist in a non-sexual context because "moist is a demeaning word to women and he should have known that".
That said, WTF is going on with this comic??? Randall forgot the joke. I could see him going for GOOMH; this comic would be great forum bait for everybody to discuss the words that they find obnoxious. Excellent forum fooder, but wait, the forums are gone. Randall is just trolling.
- The angry Lord's messengerJuly 1, 2011 at 11:04 AM
There once was a comic, Munroe,ReplyDelete
Whose thoughts were of mammary flow.
As a heathen, God's answer
Was to give his girl cancer -
Now the milk ducts have nowhere to go.
TWAWN? You should edit your limerick so that it says TWATS.ReplyDelete
Wait a minute, if the forums are gone, does that mean we won?ReplyDelete
We can finally put all the confetti I bought to good use?
Oh, wait, xkcd itself still sucks. 1 down, 1 to go.
- RochambeauJuly 1, 2011 at 11:23 AM
What do you guys think of bugcomic.com?ReplyDelete
- A supplicant at the gates of HellJuly 1, 2011 at 11:28 AM
There once was a comic, Munroe,ReplyDelete
Whose thoughts were of titty cointreau.
As a heathen, God's answer?
'twas to give his girl cancer!
Salvage chemo(*) makes nipple flambeau.
(*) This sort of chemo is used after recurrence of a malignant tumour. It is Yahweh's way of saying, "I told you to stop using the milk pump the first time."
The forums still exist; it's just the link that's gone. In fact, this comic was likely inspired by a 31-page forum thread on the subject of "what words do you hate the most?" That's right, Randall researched the words his fans hate, and made a comic that did nothing but spam those words back to them.ReplyDelete
What a hack.
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 11:52 AM
11:28 fuck youReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 12:19 PM
I am 101% sure I'll get trolled for this, but despite this being the internets I think it's not ok to be talking such shit about Randy's fiance. If anything make fun of her for being with Randall, because that is certainly something she brought upon herself.ReplyDelete
- That's what sheJuly 1, 2011 at 12:25 PM
I've seen a handful of bug comics. They're usually not funny.ReplyDelete
@ 12:19, you seem to be unfamiliar with how trolling works. Obviously people making fun of her are doing so to troll, they don't actually believe it. You're just confirming the expectation that xkcd fans will take umbrage at such action, which is exactly what they were looking to achieve in the first place.ReplyDelete
TL;DR - you just guaranteed that cuddlefish will now do exactly what you hope to prevent! Great job bro.
"Are these forums being disowned by Randall? Are we that much of a disappointment?"ReplyDelete
"The sheeple can no longer provide adequate entertainment for him."
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 1:19 PM
919: it's 856. Again. Basically.ReplyDelete
- Nobody in particularJuly 1, 2011 at 1:32 PM
You guys wanna know why I hate XKCD? Why specifically?ReplyDelete
I had a friend once, who upon hearing me complain that XKCD wasn't actually that good a comic, told me straight up that I just didn't have the right background to understand it. This person was my FRIEND and he told me that it just was too stupid at math to get this stick figure comic.
That was a while back, and it was what caused me to look up this blog.
And now, with the advent of 919, I'm just going to feel permanently justified. God DAMMIT it's just a string of words. It's somehow WORSE than the one that's a picture of a vagina for no reason. The entire joke is "Words people find yucky are yucky".
He's a hack, he's an idiot, and he deserves to have blogs made about how much his comic sucks.
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 2:04 PM
I've been had!
-anon 12:19
- Rather obvious trollJuly 1, 2011 at 2:09 PM
@12:19 Like homosexuality, cancer is often brought about by lifestyle choices.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 2:36 PM
I hate xkcd because it was my second favorite webcomic once (after achewood) and now it really sucks.ReplyDelete
i'd just like for us to take a second to appreciate the hard working limerick anons of this blog. limerick anons, we salute you.ReplyDelete
- NikitaJuly 1, 2011 at 3:49 PM
Goodbye Janet DoeReplyDelete
Though I never knew you at all
You had the grace to wear your wig
While those around you scrawled
They scrawled into MSPaint
And they whispered into your brain
They set you on the milk pump
And they made you change your name
And it seems to me that you're Randall's wife
A mistake but not a sin
Having no real man to cling to
When the C set in
And I would have liked to have bought you
But I was just outbid
Your bosom burned out long before
Your potential to be milked for sympathy by a failing comic who desperately needs a new creative angle and to look like more than a big kid with no real responsibilities ever did
Stick figure female geek was tough
The toughest role you ever played
Randall created a superstar
And pain was the price you paid
Even when you died
Oh the trolls still hounded you
All the hate blogs had to say
Was that Megan was found lactating
[repeat chorus]
Goodbye Janet Doe
Though I never knew you at all
You had the grace to wear your wig
While those around you scrawled
From the young man browsing xkcdsucks
Who sees you as something more than sexual
More than just our Megan Munroe
[repeat chorus]
We've got a talented bunch here.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 8:11 PM
This review was the equivalent of http://xkcd.com/859/ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 8:14 PM
Pained and intense, manReplyDelete
They were inquiring
They were kurious oranj
They rode over peasants like you, they rode over peasants like you
And their horses loved them too, and their horses loved them too
They Were kurious oranj
They built the world as we know it, all the systems you traverse
Rode slipshod over all dumbshits
They were kurious oranj
They freed the Blacks too
They built church in one day, man,
They were kurious oranj
Their clothes were cool
Paved way for atom bomb--didn't know
They made the Jews go to school
They made Hitler laugh in pain
They sent missionary girls to Arab states, and the sun-baked men did drool
They were kurious oranj
They made Hitler laugh in pain
They turned Napoleon over and didn't know
They invented birth control
They were invulnerable to cool
They were kurious oranj
They were beyond Ooobenblief
They were primo efficient to a man
They were Stuyvestant smoking
They were the Reformation spring
And everybody in the world turned Reformation blue
They were invulnerable to cool
And everybody in the world
And they were inquiring
They were positively deranged and they were kurious oranj
They were kurious oranj
- AnonymousJuly 1, 2011 at 10:25 PM
I remember the year I went to camp, I heard about some lady named Selma and some blacks.ReplyDelete
- Anon4:56July 2, 2011 at 12:01 AM
Randy sighed again as he dispensed another pile of tissues. His work and routine were done. A few for the mess, a few for the tears and one or two in the vain hope that he'd finally made himself lactate and finally replaced his darling Megan with himself. He'd grown impatient. He had bed sores on his back, but hadn't actually been in bed for days, lying back in his recliner chair in lieu of a bed. Heh. After the comic he had a misconception to add to the Wikipedia article. Before closing his browser, he took another fond look at the window he had open. Megan's Google+ profile. Her parents will never know what he'd done. All those years that he'd been too afraid to approach her, opting instead to stare at her breasts with his x-ray vision. His beloved forumites were right; he was a superhero, and simply needed to discover his powers. It finally made sense, and the memories of him staring at Megan's cleavage and painfully imagining what was beneath were conveniently replaced. With the seamlessness of a typo or graphical continuity correction, on those occasions he, Lord Randall, deemed it worth his while attending to then refusing to acknowledge a mistake pointed out... he now only remembered the bare chest and his capabilities.ReplyDelete
Once he learned of her cancer, and after concluding that like all significant events in his life, he was the prime causal factor, he decided to put his science research skills to good use. The Wikipedia page was not promising, providing quite a bleak chance of survival over the next decade. He found no comfort in math, hadn't read anything about self-reference and so was not yet able to take refuge there. Romance, he finally determined, was where he would go. Surely Megan would ditch this disgusting 'Mike' guy, her fiancee according to the flawed, unscientific "mainstream" reality. She would come home to the home she never knew and quietly revise her definition of "happiness". Randall felt himself swell with pride, excitement and the smell of cheese as he recalled the time Mike oh so desperately needed help with his car and Randall, Lord of Science, found the correct Wikipedia article within the hour and saved the day with his solution.
He let a solution of his own linger as he revelled in his stench, so disgusting to the unenlightened - such a damned turn-on to Megan, and other brains. In his dreams, Godel was enamoured by the smell in spite of it being on the list of fetishes which, as a Math hipster, he was forced to forgo. A man after his own heart. The threeway between himself, Rob and Zombie Godel was only a matter of time. All he needed was "a comic that didn't suck" - slowly, but surely, he was developing and would someday please Rob, making his bosoms wobble in approval like the women of Jersey Shore, his creative flagship. His thoughts turned again to Mike and Megan.
Even if Megan were only willing to see the two of them have a Wikipedia fight (his duel of choice - both starting at a Random page and seeing who can first reach some prespecified page in the least number of "moves")... any day now he and Megan would be baring her festering, cancerous nipples at TGIF. Randall was eternally grateful to his forum for inspiring his conclusion of facts and analysis. He, Randall, had harnessed nature itself to fast-track his beloved's progress. According to his writings, proven in veracity by the confirmations of his loyal fans, the eventual acceptance of the "nice guy" and the shunning of the "assholes with real jobs that bathe" happens around middle age.
- Anon4:56July 2, 2011 at 12:02 AM
Cancer had brought them closer together far more quickly, and soon every fantasy he had chronicled in stick figure form would be lived out. After a few minutes of thought, he'd decided on his course of action. He would remove the link to the forum, rewarding all who bookmarked and alienating those not cool enough to do so. "I bookmark pages because sometimes it is not convenient to use the hyperlinks which exist on other pages GOOMHR". There was a thread on his forum listing the most annoying words people tend to say, and he had constructed a sentence comprised of these words. He'd even drawn Sandra - Megan's younger sister, still in high school but oh so precocious in her valiant rejection of mainstream culture - siding with the man every true nerd projects themselves onto. Hot. They'll love her when Megan is gone.ReplyDelete
Randall reflected on his reflections once more. As the sole person besides Ayn Rand who understood Atlas Shrugged in his class at school, he alone knew how much of a burden meta-cognition was. He needed to determine how those pseudoscientific psychologists managed to read his thoughts and discover that he even had meta-cognition - with this ability, his GOOMH powers could only grow, and he would sell enough posters to move up to supermarket brand macaroni and cheese. At any rate, this comic would be late because the combination of his stream of consciousness, Wikipedia and internet sites which haven't disabled right click to prevent plagarism seemed to have taken the long route to supporting his creative genius. High on the immediate agenda was figuring how the techniques that these psychologists employed. After opening Chrome and while waiting for his home page to load, he passed the time by cracking his knuckles and whispering to himself "You've done it again, Randy!" As he nursed his bruised nipple, he pondered once more on the need for a post-Megan contingency plan. He recalled reading something about men lactating in Prisoner of War camps, opened a new tab searching "wikipedia prisoner of war delicious milk", then switched back to the Psychology article. Nothing yet on the mind control they'd employed.
Randall smirked. He'd dealt with this problem before. He wasn't aware of a serialised homeopathy publication, needed a strawman and was too afraid to seek one out. Those magazines are typically outside, where people are. He had a legion of devoted fans, devoted to he has he were to Megan (and soon Sandra), who would alter Wikipedia - and thus reality itself - if he wrote the right thing in his comic. All he needed was the perfect wording, which usually came quite quickly and without any deliberate thought. As he had changed the nature of homeopathy, he would soon bring the mind-reading powers of the dastardly Psychologist within his reach. Through the mysterious header stating "In Popular Culture", he'd since found he could directly interface with the universe and change reality at a whim.
That was his contingency. To be more precise, it was one of many. By finally breaking his silence on Megan's cancer, he hoped to make her case notable enough that she'd be within the scope of his powers. Mindreading and internet duelling 'Mike' were two other paths. If all else failed, he would starve himself as he did during the Swine Flu epidemic until his already sub-optimal testosterone levels were brought to negligible levels by his liver metabolising it for sustenance. He had many plans, but only one thing was certain.
He. WOULD. Taste. Delicious. Milk.
It WORKS, bitches!
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 12:29 AM
Megan this, Megan that, ...ReplyDelete
Do guys realize that way back in #420, Megan up and married someone else? Can't ANYONE get over her???
- Elspeth and Angus, while watching those notes go floating across the waves,July 2, 2011 at 1:23 AM
@12:29: Randall can't - he's too arrogant; Rob can't - he's too fat; we can't - we're just mirrors.ReplyDelete
Although it's interesting to note that the "Megan"-to-non-"Megan" word ratio, or megignancy, of your post is over 1/7, making you more unable to get over her than anyone in this thread. Not even reading 12:02's fanfic in full and then searching for "Is lactation in men a myth?" would beat the megignancy of your post.
- The new abridged compendium of forced lactation methodsJuly 2, 2011 at 2:05 AM
A buxom defeatist called Tiffany,ReplyDelete
Had a once-in-a-lifetime epiphany:
If she plucked a string vest
Fitted close to her chest
She'd exude contrapunctal polyphony!
captcha: doweekee: get reverted; doweekee again: get reverted; doweekee again: 3RR; b&.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 3:29 AM
Male lactation is not a myth and is easily induced via a simple hormone cocktail. In this day and age there's no excuse for a father to not assist the mother in breastfeeding his child, frankly.ReplyDelete
- Muhammad ibn Abdullah, the final prophet of God,July 2, 2011 at 5:07 AM
Back when women were women and children weren't FBI chair-warmers, there was a quaint kids' cartoon called The Family Ness. While anyone growing up in Britain in the 1980s will recall it fondly, they may not all remember the extended version of the closing tune, also available on vinyl. Youtube provides this as video 27oxkSYFFbg - consider it a lament on the suffering of animals (inc. humans) trapped in (poss. metaphorical) zoos and celebration of the contrasting carefree life of the free Nessie.ReplyDelete
To resurrect this wonderful and underrated example of early '80s merchandising, I thought I might tweak the lyrics slightly in celebration of everyone's least favourite comic.
People trip and fall and hurt their balls
And tread in poo.
Walk into walls, poke fun at Gauls
And blame it on the Jew.
Men who stand on wooden legs
The chainsaw is unfurled
Yes, there's an awful lot of humour
In the world.
You can knock him,
You can mock him,
You can take out all the graphs.
But you'll never find that Randall makes you laugh.
You may see some genitalia,
Or a nerdy social gaffe.
But you'll never find that Randall makes you laugh.
While Groening writes,
McFarlane bites,
Scott Adams sells a few.
Trey Parker drinks and Matt Stone blinks -
2.3 million view.
Satirists look you in the eye
And see you as a stew.
At feeding time they'd make
A hearty meal of you.
You can knock him,
You can mock him,
You can take out all the graphs.
But you'll never find that Randall makes you laugh.
You may dress up as a furry,
Try to mount a crippled calf.
But you'll never find that Randall makes you laugh.
And office-things
Stay out of view.
Rich financiers don't bat an eye
'cos they're not laughing too.
Tramps in the street
Can't make ends meet
Their dreams will not come true.
'cos there's not a lot to laugh at
Made by you.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 7:50 AM
The Final Prophet Of god said:ReplyDelete
".....While anyone growing up in Britain in the 1980s will recall it fondly,....."
Rather presumptuous of you. I'm still waiting for Cunty Ness to make an appearence.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 8:46 AM
altf: there's been a lot of creativity in this thread. None of it involved using the word "cunt". You might want to think about that next time you post.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 8:52 AM
It is quite interesting what passes for 'creativity' 'round here.ReplyDelete
I used the word 'Cunty', not 'cunt'
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 9:06 AM
Besides, 'Cunty Ness' is rather clever, though probably not very creative.ReplyDelete
- Cunty NessJuly 2, 2011 at 9:29 AM
That is a pretty good description of me.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 9:52 AM
It is indeed!ReplyDelete
- DanielleJuly 2, 2011 at 10:03 AM
If all the world's wonders were pearls, you know what you'd be, ALTF?ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 10:06 AM
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 10:27 AM
USA 3 - 0 ColombiaReplyDelete
At 70 minutes
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 10:45 AM
re: 919 no, ALTF's name happens to be Megan. Also, she's got long straight black hair and is really fond of people who studied physics and do webcomics. If anyone on Randall's forums is his true friend they ought to help him out by pointing that out.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 10:53 AM
What about true friends on the forums who are female? Do they have to abide?ReplyDelete
My name is actually unpronounceable in English. And people who studied physics and/or compose webcomics are cunts!
USA 3 - 0 Colombia
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 10:56 AM
Also, Megan's "noes" are really "yeses" crying to get out past social convention. Randall's whole life is like a big Victorian novel.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 11:08 AM
His whole life, to date, reads more like a 20th Century stream of consciousness narrative mode novel rather than a Victorian work.ReplyDelete
The scariest part about the story from Anon 12:01 and 12:02?ReplyDelete
It's basically canon.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 1:49 PM
Dear new abridged compendium of forced lactation methods @ 2:05 AM:ReplyDelete
Far be it for me to correct an unlettered moron's spelling, but 'contrapuntal' is the real word.
And your metrical cadence is fucked too!
You have a 10:11:6:6:11 syllabic cadence. The first line needs one more syllable!
I suggest:
"A buxomy defeatist called Tiffany"
Then again, what the fuck do I know.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 2:09 PM
look out for my spermReplyDelete
- That guy who you shall remember as having corrected youJuly 2, 2011 at 2:16 PM
@1:49: Die Kunst der Fuge well highlights the etymology and I'm not about to drop letters like some American Neanderthal. But what does Bach know?ReplyDelete
As for your ability to count syllables (well done!), please consider "Had" and "She'd" starting the second and fifth lines respectively as anacruses.
Now, tell us, what the fuck do you know? Amuse us with something creative and give us the opportunity to change our opinions of you.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 2:52 PM
A true poet will not strictly cleave to a consistent syllable count if deviating from it improves the rhythm. Not all languages even think in terms of syllables. 2:05 is a genius who clearly knows exactly what he's doing.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 3:21 PM
There once was a comic, Munroe,ReplyDelete
Whose thoughts were of mammary flow.
Being Heathen, God's answer
Was to give his girl cancer -
Now the milk ducts have nowhere to go.
Re: 918 — It's been a LONG time since I agreed with an XKCD comic. A Facebook that's not actually Facebook FTW.ReplyDelete
Re: 919 — What? What? Ewww… what?!?!?
Captcha: alitte — a very small latté.
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 5:56 PM
The problem with 918 is that it's just repeating what everyone already thought about Google+.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 2, 2011 at 11:13 PM
that's not the problem with it, its precisely what's good about itReplyDelete
- AnonymousJuly 3, 2011 at 9:41 PM
This comic was pretty ok, if insubstantial. Succinct, topical and sparing with the dialogue.ReplyDelete
I guess that's why nobody really cares or wants to talk about it.


text:
0 Members and 1 Lonely Barbarian are spying on this topic.
I'm currently playing in a game in which the GM has a nation with an undead economy. Many of our party are from a stereotypically "good" empire; many of our party are religious in some way (clerics, monks, etc.) who believe undead are anathema. However, an interesting twist is that we have recently been involved with an npc who has defected from the evil country (but still nevertheless has much sympathy for it: the defection was more for political reasons): this npc is proving extremely annoying by constantly talking about how much better off the peasants in the evil country are, how their wages and standard of living are higher; she points to beggars and says how they don't have nearly so many in the evil country etc. The trouble is that all this is true, due to the evil country's massive undead economy. We are being put in the position of having to defend our country's and religion's position to undead (which is especially difficulty as the good country has it's share of opulent palaces, cathedrals, etc.)
Yes, being rich can earn you eternity. Undead can be repaired and "healed" with spells, but some really "break down". Thanks for the term, by the way, it even more implies the robot terminology.
The converse is also possible. A society that outlaws slavery, but allows for necromantic labour, may find an unscrupulous individual or seven that would try and pass slaves off as zombies. It may be much easier & cheaper to bring in living slaves, even with cosmetics to add a "dead" look & possibly an odour of decay (but this may not be needed if the slaves are treated deplorably), than to bear the cost of reanimation. Slavers are also cheaper than necromancers, and easier to get rid of, should you no longer desire their services. Assuming that a living person--however poorly treated--will be more intelligent alive than dead, these imitation zombies can be given tasks that would be impossible for a zombie; assembly-line work comes to mind. If zombie labour is allowed, a slavemaster can abuse his or her slaves beyond even the vile extent of the US south, the Romans, or the Etruscans. After all, they're just "zombies..."
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text:
Saturday, March 7, 2009
This is similar to but distinct from the Frequently Annoying Questions. okay go
52 comments:
Okay how complete does this profile have to be because this is basically all I will give you now:ReplyDelete
Grammatically Assholey Cuddlefish: HAW HAW I KNOW GRAMMAR you cannot spell and therefore you stoopid.
short is fine at first, we can clearly flesh them out as we go.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousMarch 8, 2009 at 7:58 AM
Oh, the irony.
The Free Time Lord: This highly busy, meticulously scheduled Cuddlefish has so much of a life, it's ridiculous. His life is so rich and vibrant that he's made it his sworn duty to bring others to the same enlightened state of Having-A-Lifedom. So he spends every millisecond of his vanishingly short free time scolding bloggers about how they must have to write such long posts.ReplyDelete
the ones who think they are the first to say "hey here's an idea: if you don't like xkcd, just don't read it"ReplyDelete
the ones who say "i just started reading this blog but it is dumb: you force yourself to say something bad about every comic, no matter what, you obsess about one webcomic and don't talk about any others, and you don't seem to have ever considered the idea that you may be wrong." And other similarly untrue statements, because they just got here (often from a link on the xkcd forums) and have only read the top one or two posts.
ugh ugh ughReplyDelete
"how they must have no life to write such long posts about a stick figure webcomic."
the grammar cuddlefish are gonna get meeeeeeeee
- CuddlyfishMarch 8, 2009 at 2:34 PM
The "Randall's not trying to be funny" cuddlefish.ReplyDelete
The ones that post every god-damned time Randall makes an observational joke that falls through. They like to imagine that we are idiots that don't understand Randall's genius. They often come bearing sarcasm to show their disdain for our philistine opinions. Pompous fucks.
Assholey Cuddlefish: Yes good job. That was kind of the point?ReplyDelete
Cuddlyfish: YES add to that the ones that are like OMG U JUST DONT GET IT OK
CAPTCHA: efacess. Kind of sounds like e-feces. Which is xkcd.
Why bother? He's not gonna be back.ReplyDelete
The cuddlefish who signs his name as "cuddlefish" or some variant but then contributes meaningfully to the discussion, NOT LIKE A REAL CUDDLEFISH AT ALLReplyDelete
- GreaterStevenMarch 8, 2009 at 9:39 PM
I'm all for a frequently posed arguments page, because that would actually work towards the cause of getting people to realize that Randall is losing it.ReplyDelete
But this will piss people off. Admittedly fun to do, but I think it hurts the overall purpose of the blog, no?
- AnonymousMarch 8, 2009 at 11:54 PM
And once again, the Sqhugglefish are forgotten :(ReplyDelete
Why do you hate squiddyhuggles so? :(
"The soul of wit" cuddlefish: why do you write such a long blog post when simply saying "the joke sucked" would've been enough.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousMarch 9, 2009 at 1:42 AM
Whether or not I agree with what your saying, up until now I've thought you blog worked as a decent criticism site (mostly). I don't see the point in this latest expansion to the site.ReplyDelete
Is it simply that when someone challenges you you can put them in an archetype and use a simple "You're one of these people so the argument is irrelevant," which would be a shame because, Carl, when people disagree with you you are normally very good at arguing back, so I actually think this section would be a real detriment to the blog because it really would make it come accross as a lot more insular that there are so many different stereotypes you have to make sure you don't fall into before you post, lest you get ridiculed.
For inspiration, Carl, you should look at John Solomon's 'Stupid Complaints Bingo' at the link below:ReplyDelete
I'm not suggesting you copy this exactly; Solomon's schtick is very over-the-top abuse, and that's not what you do. But some of them are pretty funny.
david, we ridicule these people anyway. this is just a shortcutReplyDelete
I can see what you are saying, but I suspect the hope is that, from it, there maybe be a greater ratio of blog comments from cuddlefish who have something novel or constructive to bring to the conversation.
captcha: "culpasp", a fictitious affliction to rival ryoma in all its disgusting forms.
On an unrelated note, the new Dinosaur Comics just beat the pants off of xkcd for clever meme integration into a comic. The strip itself is also hilarious.ReplyDelete
I believe the point is that a huge amount of criticism of this blog comes from people who mesh perfectly into the above profiles, and this is a convenient way of merely pointing out that they are neither witty nor original, and their ability to be critical while anonymous isn't going to make Carl take down his site in tears.
Here's all the profiles I could think of (some were already mentioned)
Busyfish - Has never had a moment of free time in their entire life or is just a slow typist and overestimates the amount of time it takes to make a blog post.
Elitefish - This cuddlefish is better than you and will not hesitate to let you know that the reason you do not appreciate this comic is because you just don't get it. The most popular webcomic on the entire internet is a niche comic, and the Elitefish is totally indie enough to get it.
Grammarfish - Points out minor grammatical errors and what were obviously typos to prove that he's actually much smarter than you.
Moralfish - Moralfish are appalled that you would waste time ranting about XKCD when there are so many more important things going on the the world that you can blog about. This can also be considered a subset of the Busyfish
Geniusfish - This fish didn't actually read anything on this site other than the most recent blog post (which he followed from the XKCD forums, where all geniuses live), but the doesn't need to, he's a genius. He'll merely point out that if you hate XKCD so much, you should stop visiting it.
Empathyfish - The Empathyfish is a kind and caring creature who realizes that Carl has made a mistake with this blog. Since the Empathyfish is such a good, caring friend... he does not hesitate to point out that xkcd sucks is really pathetic or that an xkcd sucks sucks blog should be made as a counterweight.
Expertfish: The Expertfish believes that criticism is a realm that only dare be explored by those who have had direct experience in the field they are criticizing, or what they might call "experts." Since Carl does not have a popular webcomic, he is obviously not qualified to critique xkcd, and according to Expertfish, this blog is worthless until he does.ReplyDelete
lol poore how did I know you would say that oneReplyDelete
Which brings to mind that there is apparently a new cuddlefish that really hates when people say they "know" things. I dunno what to call this creature.
Ah. A subset of the Elitefish.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousMarch 9, 2009 at 12:21 PM
Can I clarify something? Is everybody who posts without a blogspot account considered a Cuddlefish until you discover they have something useful or interesting to contribute?ReplyDelete
If this is the case, should it not be the other way round? Shouldn't it be more along the lines of "innocent until proven guilty"?
Just my thoughts
David (not the same as above)
Cuddlefish is a more useful and fun noun than 'anonymous poster.'ReplyDelete
here ya goReplyDelete
Arguefish: The Arguefish will oppose your view no matter what you say. They point out that you are clearly wrong about the topic, and will write an extremely long, "well-thought out" and "witty" rebuttal about what you screwed up, all in about two minutes and usually ending in GTFO, STFU, LOL, ect. They usually spell simple words such as "the" and "what" wrong, but this can't be taken into consideration seeing as how they're smart enough to solve your problems and you aren't. Arguefish are a subset of the Elitefish, and can be dangerous when provoked, however often times cuttlefish such as the Grammarfish and Busyfish will team up against it.
Spamfish: A common yet less understood variety of cuddlefish, the Spamfish remains a scientific mystery. Some believe that the fish is actually made of real spam. Their comment will probably look something like "lol yea well ur a fag LOLOLOL u dun no wats funy ROFLCOPTER SOI SOI SOI!!!!!". All we know as a fact is that a post from one will never be on topic.
Mathematifish: The Mathematifish is a rare one indeed, as most cuddlefish are not smart enough to figure out math past grade 7, and those that are usually have an attention span of around 1-5 seconds. These cuddlefish could have been of some significant use to society, had they not been forced into the internet. Usually addicts of webcomics such as XKCD, they will use their superior math logic to "prove once and for all that the comic was funny". Just because it's "more complicated than it looks" means that anyone who doesn't get it "is stupid, ignorant and dumb". Considered by many to be yet another subset of the Elitefish, but the issue is still under debate.
False Cuddlefish: The person who signs their name as "Cuddlefish", but is NOT AT ALL A CUDDLEFISH. Wonder why they would want to insult themselves...?
WARNING: NOT a real cuddlefish. Take a deep breath and exhale, the world isn't ending because a cuddlefish said something useful.
- the_cuddlefishMarch 9, 2009 at 1:19 PM
SPAM is a trademark of the Hormel Foods Corp and hence should always be capitalised.ReplyDelete
...Man, I have nothing to contribute, and yet I found myself wanting to type something. So you get this. I suppose you might have meant that Spamfish are made of unsolicited electronic mail, but hey. Then I wouldn't have got to type anything.
Agreeablefish: Occasionally a Cuddlefish will post words of praise and encouragement from atop their lengthy fins, and we will all be confused because we expected abuse from Anonymous.ReplyDelete
Something many of these cuddlefish share in common: they come to this fishtank of a blog and preach of the ocean, when their words are just more bubbles from the plastic treasure chest.ReplyDelete
Though I have to give a shout-out to the cuddlefish who are insightful or raise legitimate points. Not all species of cuddlefish are poisonous!
omigod you guys I should not be reading this in class because I can't stop laughing. Good work to everyone!ReplyDelete
Anon, since you do not wish to be called a Cuddlefish, I will just tell you that I like to call just about every Anon a Cuddlefish for the same reasons as Rob does. Also it is more fun to say Cuddlefish-related words like "tentacles" and ummm. Well I guess that is it.
You know, I think we should first give a definition for Cuddlefish in GENERAL, and then go into the details.ReplyDelete
- CuddlyfishMarch 9, 2009 at 7:06 PM
Cuttlefish: Likes to eat small shrimp and fish. Likes to hang out on the ocean floor and blend in. Is SUPER pissed off that you keep misusing his name. Man, he's so pissed right now, that if I drew him he would have two VERY slanty eyebrows.ReplyDelete
Bweeheehee. Cuddlyfish you are by far my favorite Cuddlefish I have ever met.ReplyDelete
Kurt I think the problem with that is we have different definitions of the term... the only consistent part of the definition is that the poster is anonymous. Level of stupidity is subject to personal tastes.
Memefish: The Memefish is actually a possible subset of all other Cuddlefish, consisting of Cuddlefish who feel compelled to seed their posts with memes to seem more "Internet cool" (read: uncool) or "Internet smart" (read: not smart) than they really are.ReplyDelete
E.g., Memefish is a pretty cool guy - eh posts anonymously and doesn't afraid of anything.
- AnonymousMarch 10, 2009 at 12:42 AM
"Which brings to mind that there is apparently a new cuddlefish that really hates when people say they "know" things. I dunno what to call this creature."ReplyDelete
Any irritated philosopher cuddlefish will do.
- CuddlyfishMarch 10, 2009 at 1:05 PM
Randallfish: I know it's you, Randall! Go away! (Based on my assumption that every anonymous poster is actually a sad, insecure Randall, who, through tear filled eyes, is reading everything we say about him and just can't believe that so many people on the internet dislike him.)ReplyDelete
(Ok, I think I'm done now.)
Late-to-the-party-Fish: The one who, a few months after we are done commenting on a new comic, pipes in with "guyz ur wrong on this 1" and nothing else.ReplyDelete
Who is a good irritated philosopher?ReplyDelete
Randallfish is a good one.
Sarcasmfish (though normally three consonants wouldn't be put together like that): A cuddlefish who will take your comment, repeat it back to you, and add some "witty" remark at the end telling you one thing, but really meaning ANOTHER thing! It's so zany, unique and creative! Just like that last sentence!! OH WHAT FUN!!!ReplyDelete
There are plenty of candidates for irritated-philosopher-fish, but my vote would have to go for Aquinasfish.ReplyDelete
Because face it, if old Tom Aquinas was looking down 'pon the Earth, he'd be pretty pissed that no-one gives a shit about his theories anymore.
A general note: Although cuddlefish normally hunt alone, when two team up the result is devastating. Certain combinations of cuddlefish can be worse than others (such as the Elitefish and the Geniusfish). The resulting one-sided feeding frenzy between the two may never end, slowing down the site with considerable amounts of spam. However some combinations have been deemed impossible, such as the Arguefish and the Agreeablefish, which would create a space-time paradox that would indirectly lead to the end of the universe.ReplyDelete
- AnonymousMarch 10, 2009 at 7:42 PM
"Randallfish: I know it's you, Randall! Go away! (Based on my assumption that every anonymous poster is actually a sad, insecure Randall, who, through tear filled eyes, is reading everything we say about him and just can't believe that so many people on the internet dislike him.)"ReplyDelete
Honestly I don't think he gives a shit about you guys to even bother visiting your site. Otherwise how did he do so many wikis in a row?
In any case it's a bit egotistical to think that he even visits let alone cries at opinions...
Densefish: the Cuddlefish over whose head sarcasm and exaggeration fly.ReplyDelete
So... Amanda is a densefish, without being a cuddlefish?ReplyDelete
Maybe she is a cuddlefish in disguise! That would explain why she seems to hurt her own cause so purposefully! o_o
Name have we not already established that I am torn between my Cuddly children and the xkcdsucks bears?ReplyDelete
That being said, I have no idea what you are saying at all, Sarcasmfish. I was not aware I had a cause and perhaps that is how I am haplessly hurting it?
Also do we have two different Kurts or are you one and the same and just sometimes forget to log in?
CAPTCHA: iguenes! Do you think there is an iguanafish? One that kind of blends into... wait... that would be some octopus-esque thing, I guess.
- AnonymousMarch 11, 2009 at 8:08 AM
Noob question: Why "cuddlefish"?ReplyDelete
That really doesn't deserve an answer. Just go read more of the blog.ReplyDelete
Curious Cuddlefish: Check back around Christmas time, in the comments thread around the post 'My Little Cuttle-Muffin.'ReplyDelete
Apathetic Cuddlefish: The three wiki comics in a row was almost certainly Randall trying to fuck with us; we have very credible reason (email from Randall, apparently) to believe he is aware of and disapproves of the blog, and if Randall is anything like me (hint: he is like a less talented, less emotionally well-developed, more elitist, less artistic version of me) he probably wanders by occasionally just to see what we're doing and then gets all indignant that we're so dumb and mean.
No, same Kurt. I just made a profile recently.ReplyDelete
Trollfish: Go ahead. Feed it. See if you make it out of this thread alive.
Overreactorfish: This cuddlefish will take anything you say, and blow it WAY out of proportion. They usually use extremely unrealistic analogy.
Pfeffer's Flamboyant Cuttlefish - the only one that isn't tasty to eat. Mwhahaha - fear my real cuddlefish... Maybe?ReplyDelete


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2:00 am
Scientific American Frontiers "Body Building" Alan Alda meets scientists who are working to grow new liver, heart muscle, cartilage and retina tissue, and to bring mobility to people paralyzed by spinal-cord injuries.G
3:00 am
NASA Sci Files "The Case of the Powerful Pulleys" One of the tree house detectives has had an accident and cannot get into the tree house. Using Problem-Based Learning, the rest of the gang investigates the world of simple machines and physical science and "pulls" together to get everyone into the tree house.G
4:00 am
Mechanical Universe And Beyond, The "Newton's Laws" Newton lays down the laws of force, mass, and acceleration. D
4:30 am
Power of Place: Geography for the 21st Century "Challenges in the Hinterlands" Andalucia: Developments in the Hinterlands - Spanish Andalucia struggles to move beyond tourism and agriculture to integrate with the Europe's heartland. Iceland: Edge of the Habitable World - At the borders of the habitableworld, Iceland must balance sustainable fish harvests with social costs. D
5:00 am
NHK Newsline NULL
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Connect with English "Differences/A Visit to the Doctor" In the first segment, Rebecca's starts to apply to music schools. In the second segment, Rebecca's father has a worrisome checkup from his doctor.G
6:00 am
6:30 am
Clifford The Big Red Dog "Embarrassing Moments/Lucky Charm" Clifford's Big Idea: Be Kind When Vaz rips his pants during a soccer game, everyone helps him feel better by telling their own tales of embarrassing moments. However, Jetta insists these things never happen to her. LUCKY CHARM - Clifford's Big Idea: Believe in Yourself After losing her lucky stone, Emily Elizabeth loses her confidence. D
7:00 am
Arthur "The Making of Arthur/Dancing Fools" The Making of Arthur - Matt Damon guest-stars in animated form as the host of a new series, "Postcards from You." When the Oscar # winning star puts out a call for homemade videos for his TV show, he sets off a frantic rush among Arthur and his gang to film their lives. Could the experiences of kids in Elwood City really interest a television audience? They'll have to wait and see if Matt Damon thinks so. D
7:30 am
Martha Speaks "Martha Smells/Martha Hears" Martha Smells - Martha is secretly trapped inside Pablum and Weaselgraft's hideout. Martha Hears - For the same story from a different sensory perspective, Martha once again finds herself trapped in Weaselgraft and Pablum's lair, but this time she leads Helen and TD to their hideout by describing what she hears.G
8:00 am
Curious George "Ice Station Monkey/The Perfect Carrot" George tries to find Chinstrap penguins in the Antarctic and must stay in a cave during a blizzard.G
8:30 am
Cat in the Hat Knows A Lot About That! "Hooray for Hair/Ice Is Nice" Hooray for Hair - Sally and Nick are getting their hair cut today; maybe they should try new hairstyles! A trip to meet three of Cat's friends (and some styling help from the Wig-o-lator) will help them decide! Should they have Yak hair? No, too hot! How about hair like a fur seal? Not quite, too short. A porcupine? No way! How will they ever get a hug from their moms with hair that spiky? They decide that the hair they have is what's perfect for them! Ice is Nice - Nick and Sally want some nice cold lemonade, but there's no more ice cubes in Sally's fridge! A trip to Freeze-your-knees Snowland will fix that! They meet Cat's friend Polly the polar bear who introduces Sally and Nick to all the different kinds of ice that make up her home. After trying many types of ice, they find the kind that will be perfect for their lemonade!. D
9:00 am
Super Why! "The Three Little Pigs: The Return of the Wolf" Pig and his brothers are trying to make a picnic table for their yard, but it all goes terribly wrong! So Super Why and his friends visit the tale of The Three Little Pigs, hoping to find out a little bit about building from the young Poppa Pig. Will they learn how to construct something sturdy, or will the Big Bad Wolf huff, puff and ruin their plans? Educational Objectives: To learn the importance of following instructions. Kids will sing the alphabet, rhyme with ICKS words, and use the power to read to change the story. D
9:30 am
Dinosaur Train "An Armored Tail Tale/Pterasaur Flying Club" An Armored Tail Tale - The Pteranodons tag along as Hank Ankylosaurus visits the Big Pond to scout a Dinoball talent named Eugene Euoplocephalus. Eugene is a smaller version of Hank, an armored dinosaur with a giant tail-club. Hank and Eugene really hit it off, and after they all play Dinoball, Hank recruits Eugene to play on his team! Pterosaur Flying Club - Tiny and Shiny practice their swoop-de-loops and other flying moves in anticipation of their play-date with fellow Pterosaurs Petey Peteinosaurus and Quincy Quetzalcoatlus. D
10:00 am
Sesame Street "Don't Wake The Baby" Leela hums as she rocks her sleeping baby niece, Nila, in a bassinet in the arbor. Telly and Elmo come bounding in loudly trying to offer their help, but Leela insists that she doesn't need any assistance. She's hoping Nila will stay asleep as long as there aren't any loud noises on Sesame Street. D
11:00 am
Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood "Daniel's Sleepover/Backyard Camping" Daniel's Sleepover - Daniel and his parents go to Prince Wednesday's castle for a family sleepover. When Daniel and Prince Wednesday go through their bedtime routines together, Daniel realizes how different it is sleeping at Prince Wednesday's castle. As bedtime nears, Daniel and Prince Wednesday notice some things that are just a little bit scary. D
11:30 am
Sid The Science Kid "My Shrinking Shoes" When Sid's shoes don't fit, he declares that his shoes must be shrinking. Sid and his friends discover that it's hard to see things growing, because growing happens slowly over time. It turns out Sid's shoes weren't shrinking -- he was growing!. D
12:00 pm
WordWorld "Robots to the Rescue!/Radio Read-A-Thon" Robots to the Rescue! - When Frog discovers that you can make a word "more than one" by adding the letter S to the end of it, he becomes a mad scientist of sorts, making more and more of everything! Frog learns that while having a lot of stuff might seem like a good idea, too much of anything soon leads to chaos. Frog fortunately has a robot who likes to clean up! Build a Word: ROBOTS. Radio Read-a-thon - Duck asks Frog to read his favorite book on Ant's radio station because he can't read it himself. D
12:30 pm
Caillou "Caillou The Snowman" Snowflakes - Caillou eagerly awaits the first snowfall of winter, and imagines himself building the biggest snowman in the world. When the snowflakes finally start to fall he rushes outside to play. He and Sarah take a close look at some snowflakes, and then go inside to make their own snowflakes out of paper. D
1:00 pm
Barney & Friends "Rabbits/Listen" Rabbits - BJ is pretending to be a great detective. But all great detectives need a mystery to solve! One quickly comes his way when an animal nibbles on one of Baby Bop's healthy snacks. BJ, Barney, and Baby Bop uncover several clues along the way and soon realize the animal is someone's pet rabbit. D
1:30 pm
Thomas & Friends "Winter Delights" Merry Misty Island - It's the Winter Holidays on the Island of Sodor. Dash, Bash and Ferdinand decide to throw a party. This is their first party and they're not really sure what to do and they won't ask Thomas to help them. D
2:00 pm
Curious George "Ice Station Monkey/The Perfect Carrot" George tries to find Chinstrap penguins in the Antarctic and must stay in a cave during a blizzard.G
2:30 pm
Martha Speaks "Martha Smells/Martha Hears" Martha Smells - Martha is secretly trapped inside Pablum and Weaselgraft's hideout. Martha Hears - For the same story from a different sensory perspective, Martha once again finds herself trapped in Weaselgraft and Pablum's lair, but this time she leads Helen and TD to their hideout by describing what she hears.G
3:00 pm
The Electric Company "Wordball Games" Right before the yearly Wordball Games, the neighborhood Olympics, Hector sprains his ankle. With Hector unable to compete, The Electric Company does not have enough players to participate against the four Pranksters! But when Manny also gets hurt, the numbers are even once again. Now the question is, can Marcus handle Hector's event the Word Obstacle course?. D
3:30 pm
WordGirl "Becky and the Bard/Monkey Robot Showdown" Becky and the Bard - Violet and Becky compete for the coveted role of Juliet to play opposite the dreamy Hunter Throbheart in Romeo & Juliet. Violet is cast as Juliet while Becky is the understudy. When the Energy Monster captures Violet, Becky must chose between the role of a lifetime and saving her friend. D
4:00 pm
Wild Kratts "Raptor Roundup" Martin and Chris challenge themselves to ID as many hawks, eagles, owls, falcons and vultures as they can. But the evil endangered species chef, Gaston Gourmand has his own plan for the raptors and has been capturing them all in his quest to find the tastiest bird wing. Will the Wild Kratts team succeed in rescuing the raptors before they become Gourmand's next gourmet delicacy? They'll have to use everything they know about classification and birds of prey - to round up the raptors and return them to where they belong - living free and in the wild!. D
4:30 pm
Cyberchase "The Grapes of Plath" A terrible cyberglitch afflicts the young prince of the Crab Kingdom and the CyberSquad must cure him and stop Hacker before all is lost. D
5:00 pm
Fetch! With Ruff Ruffman "Wolfing Down Some Barbeque" Ruff has a family reunion barbeque, and invites some distant relatives-wolves! He sends Emmie and Rubye to Yellowstone National Park to learn all about wolves, and sends Jay and Marc to South Carolina to make some authentic southern barbeque. D
5:30 pm
5:56 pm
NewsHour Promo NULL
6:00 pm
PBS NewsHour President Barack Obama delivers the State of the Union speech to a joint session of Congress in the House chamber, presenting his plan and solutions for issues facing the nation. The Republican response to the address follows.G
7:00 pm
PBS NewsHour President Barack Obama delivers the State of the Union speech to a joint session of Congress in the House chamber, presenting his plan and solutions for issues facing the nation. The Republican response to the address follows.G
9:00 pm
Frontline "Cliffhanger" This February, as the nation faces yet another round of fiscal crises, FRONTLINE investigates the inside history of how Washington has failed to solve the country's problems of debt and deficit. Drawing on interviews with key players in Congress and the White House, FRONTLINE goes behind the scenes to show how a clash of politics and personalities has taken the nation's economy to the edge of the "fiscal cliff," and now to a second round of standoffs over the debt ceiling and sequestration. The film explores the deep ideological divide inside the Republican Party and the struggle between House Majority Leader Eric Cantor and House Speaker John Boehner as they take on President Obama and the Democrats. D
10:00 pm
John D. Rockefeller: American Experience John D. Rockefeller Jr. dedicates his life to recasting the family image, which for decades is associated with his father's feared monopoly, Standard Oil, and predatory business practices. As the elder Rockefeller's only son, he dedicates his life to recasting the family image, giving away hundreds of millions of dollars and insisting his six children behave impeccably. He leaves an invaluable inheritance: a name that stood for "the well-being of mankind."G


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New Car Lemon Law
If your new car, truck (weighing less than 1 1/2 tons), motorcycle, ATV or RV has turned sour and left a bad taste in your mouth, getting rid of your motor vehicle may be easier than you think.
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The Ohio Lemon Law covers all new or used consumer motor vehicles that are still within one year of the original sale date and have less than 18,000 miles on the odometer. Price does not matter, and the vehicle can be purchased or leased.
What does matter is that you have experienced problems covered by the manufacturer's warranty and you have given the manufacturer and/or the dealer a reasonable opportunity to fix the problems. It is important for you to be aware of the new car Lemon Law in Ohio and for you to understand your rights under the law and how it can help you get rid of your lemon.
Even though today's vehicles may be more reliable, they are also more complex, so the risk of some kind of expensive failure of a system or component, is greater than ever before. Don't delay, call our experienced lemon law team today at 1-888-331-6422.
Can You Answer Yes to Any of These Questions? If So, You've Got a Lemon!
Within the first 18,000 miles or the first year after delivery, was your motor vehicle in the shop three times for the same defect and it didn't get fixed? Then your vehicle is probably a lemon.
Within the first 18,000 miles or the first year after delivery, was your motor vehicle in the shop for 30 days or more? Then your vehicle is probably a lemon.
Within the first 18,000 miles or the first year after delivery, did you complain about eight or more different problems that impair the use, value or safety of the motor vehicle? Then your vehicle is probably a lemon.
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You can attempt to "do it yourself" but watch out for the ways the manufacturer will try to take advantage of you. See Victoria's Story. They may not offer you a full reimbursement or they may try to assess a usage fee even though the law does not allow it. Or, they may try to have the dealer handle the deal and in that scenario, the dealer doesn't follow the lemon law at all but rather treats your lemon like a trade-in and then writes up a new "good deal" which may not be so good after all – especially if you are only focused on the monthly payment rather than the total cost of the vehicle. If you allow this to happen, your down payment and/or payments on the lemon may be "lost" in the transaction on the new vehicle.
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Find Out About Your Car
- Cadillac Lemon Law
- Chevy Lemon Law
- Chrysler Lemon Law
- Dodge Lemon Law
- Ford Lemon Law
- Honda Lemon Law
- Hyundai Lemon Law
- Jeep Lemon Law
- Kia Lemon Law
- Lexus Lemon Law
- Nissan Lemon Law
Looking for recalls on your vehicle? Check it out here
- Recalled Cars List
- Recalled RVs List
- Recalled Motorcycles List
- Recalled ATVs List
- Recalled Trucks List
Looking for the latest on car dealer scams, ripoffs, and tricks to steal your money? Check it out here


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ROUZERVILLE — The eighth annual Santa's Breakfast hosted by the Rouzerville Lions Club will be held from 8 to 11 a.m. Saturday, Dec. 1, at the Rouzerville Ruritan Club.
The breakfast, which includes pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausage, orange juice, hot chocolate and coffee, costs $5 for adults and $3 for children.
Complimentary pictures with Santa on his sleigh will be taken during the breakfast.
Train rides on the Red Run Express at Rouzerville's Red Run Park will be available to the youngsters from 1 to 3 p.m. that day.
All ticket holders during the breakfast will be given a free skate pass for Cosmic Skate to be used on from 1 to 4 p.m. Dec. 1 only.


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Coast Guard welcomes a rock star
New London - Coast Guard Academy athletic director Tim Fitzpatrick was at last summer's National Association of Collegiate Directors of Athletics convention in Dallas, when he found himself on a panel with former Tennessee athletic director Joan Cronan.
A rock star of sorts.
"I had met Joan a number of times. I was wowed with having the opportunity to work with her for a two-day period," Fitzpatrick said. "She's an icon in our business. She's always been a hero of mine."
Of course, Fitzpatrick recruited Cronan for Coast Guard's second annual Women's Leadhership Symposium held Tuesday on campus. And Cronan, now Tennessee's women's athletic director emeritus/consultant and advisor to the chancellor, accepted.
Cronan, 68, the longtime face of women's athletics at Tennessee, was named interim athletic director for both the men's and women's programs in 2011, bridging the gap between outgoing AD Mike Hamilton and current director Dave Hart. During that time she hired baseball coach Dave Serrano and helped oversee the merge of the university's then-separate men's and women's athletics programs.
On Tuesday, Cronan, a Louisiana State graduate who bills herself as " Cajun, with orange blood," found herself in rival territory: Connecticut.
Cronan led off the conference, imparting some of her core values and the "passion and pride" which make Tennessee the athletic powerhouse that it is. She called former women's basketball coach Pat Summitt "one of the best leaders athletics has ever had," and sprinkled stories from Summitt's Hall of Fame coaching tenure in with tales of her own successes and mistakes.
Cronan was joined by Horizon League associate commissioner Alfreeda Goff, in her second year on the panel; Lori Ebihara, senior associate athletic director at Maryland; China Jude, vice president of athletics at Queens College; Laurie Priest, athletic director at Mount Holyoke; and Charlie Robert, athletic director at Nichols College.
Attending were women from the Coast Guard and Connecticut College athletic communities, as well as colleges from around New England.
"It's a lot of initiative the Coast Guard has taken," Cronan said. "I'm very impressed with Tim and his ability. I couldn't help but be excited."
Cronan spoke of the three C's that are necessary for success: competition, confidence and communication. She spoke of watching former Lady Vols women's basketball player Dena Head, who, having missed crucial free throws in the past, sank two with seven seconds in regulation to help win the 1991 national championship.
She said she's added a fourth C since seeing Summitt battle early-onset dementia: courage.
"She is fighting it straight up," said Cronan, who at first told Summitt that she didn't have to fight the battle publicly if she chose to keep it private. "She looked me straight in the eye and said, 'We do.'"
Cronan said she has the initials "BELLS" written into her iPhone, something she tries to abide by every day. Read the bible, exercise, learn, write a handwritten letter or note to someone and try to do a special project, such as vacuum, she added with a laugh.
Overall, Cronan said she is grateful Tennessee had a women's athletic department all those years, so that the women's program had a chance to build.
"I loved every bit of it. I love every day I go to work," Cronan said. "� Tennessee said 'yes' to women's sports before it was cool and that has continued. Pride and passion. That's what you see when you walk into Thompson-Boling Arena."
"It's awesome," said first-year Coast Guard women's basketball coach Alex Ivansheck of the second-year conference. "I haven't been to anything like it. Hopefully it will continue. I like it that (Fitzpatrick) thinks outside the box."
Watch Live: New London vs. Bacon Acadmey in ECC girls' basketball final
Fitch's Amara Robinson: from broken back to all-state cheerleader
College trustee quits over Nazi uniform yearbook photo from 1980


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Allison WalkerAlumni, Class of 2011
Allison is trained in both classical ballet and information science. Her many interests include architecture, interaction design, information architecture, movement, body awareness, dance, video, cognition, music, sound, physical computing, HCI, and performance...among other things. She also enjoys watching movies, cooking, going to museums and the zoo, thinking about the way the mind and body work, and talking to herself while taking long walks in the woods. Feel free to say hello.
|Country of Origin:
|Current residence:
|New York City,