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Amal al-Mugdad was always devout, but as the Syrian conflict engulfed her hometown of Dera'a, her prayers grew increasingly desperate. Rising daily before dawn, the slight young woman unrolled her prayer mat, her ears strained for the sound of bullets. On her knees in the dark, she begged for peace in her country and mercy for her people. By daylight, though, there were few signs that Allah had heard her plea. Regime aircraft rattled against the sky. Neighborhood streets grew inscrutable, blocked by shifting checkpoints and sprawling rubble.
Fear whittled Amal's world. By 2012, her universe encompassed only three points: her sons, Khalid and Ma'an, then ages two years and six months, respectively; and her 24-year-old husband, Mahmood. It was her husband — the man she married at 19, whom she privately called Hamoodi — that worried her the most. This was a conflict with a particular appetite for young, able-bodied men, targeting them with checkpoints and home raids. By 2015, an estimated 65,000 people were "disappeared" by the regime, forced to enlist in President Bashar al-Assad's army or vanished into the underworld of government prisons. Others were felled by snipers, for reasons never given.
Amal's nightmare arrived on a sunny winter's day. It was December 19, 2012. Mahmood stepped out to call Amal's cousin to lunch. A soldier shot him through the heart. "I had my boys in my arms," Amal recalled, five years later. "I don't remember what I did with them." She went on: "Then I was in the street. I saw his body. He looked like he was sleeping. I couldn't stop screaming." She lunged at the soldier, her brother holding her back. "I cried, Why, why him?" There was no reply.
They buried Mahmoud immediately. Amal was taken, in shock, to a nearby uncle. A few weeks later, her relatives persuaded her to flee, rousing Amal with the one message that could still reach her: It would be safer for her boys, outside Syria. On foot, she followed the stream of refugees south, toward the porous Jordanian border. Ma'an, drenched in winter rain, developed a wrenching cough. "He kept crying and I was crying too, calling out, 'My God, my God.' I didn't know what to do," Amal told me. As the sounds of war grew distant, Amal was stirred by a new fear: how would she, a woman, shoulder the burden of her fledgling family alone?
A dozen miles outside the Jordanian capital of Amman, over 300 Syrians, mostly women and children, work to construct meaning from the fragments of exile. They occupy "Karama," an isolated strip of apartment buildings atop a rocky hill, run by a local charity to shelter some of the area's most destitute refugees. Men under 40 are rare; like Amal, most of the women of Karama were widowed or separated from their husbands by the war, and now find themselves at the head of sprawling, often desperate, families. Bereft of their traditional guardians and providers, these women have been forced to reimagine their lives outside the traditional economic and social expectations of gender.
The upending of these norms can create huge anxieties for women, compounding their existing trauma and entrenching them in poverty. For many, survival becomes contingent on their ability to take on new, traditionally male roles, said Bothaina Qamar, who until this month worked as a livelihoods specialist at U.N. Women in Jordan. "Back in Syria, only 14 percent of women were engaged in the labor market," Qamar said, "especially among rural communities, the men dominate the society outside the home."
As of 2016, roughly 40 percent of Syrian refugee households in Jordan were headed by women, most of them responsible for numerous children and one or more elderly relatives. Even so, many these now-single women have been reluctant or unable to find formal employment. "Some are raised to believe it is dishonorable or dangerous for women to work outside the home," said Qamar, "and many are accustomed only to agricultural and domestic work." Of the more than 58,000 work permits that have been given to Syrians as of last month, 4 percent have been to women.
Many women feel uncomfortable being outside the home without a male relative and feel ill-equipped to make financial decisions. Although Amal attended university before the war, she would never before have considered traveling without her husband, father, or brother. "Before the azma"— crisis — "I never left my neighborhood without Hamoodi or a man from my family," she told me.
Lucy Cracknell, protection adviser for the International Medical Corps in Jordan, said these single women often have real reason to worry about safety as refugees in Jordan. Both women and children in female-headed households face greater risk of sexual harm and gender-based violence, a fact that often drives women to self-isolate. This compounds poverty, creating severe economic straits that can lead to "negative coping mechanisms," Cracknell said, including "child marriage or child labor for their children, sex work, other risky behaviors."
For all the stigma and fear some Syrian women feel about working, most of them are in urgent need of an income. As of 2016, four out of five Syrian households in Jordan live below the poverty line, and among female-headed households, the situation is more grim. As of 2016, at least 10 percent of these families faced immediate eviction from their homes, and one-third were in debt to their landlords. According to another recent study by the U.N. High Commissioner for Refugees, 63 percent of Syrian refugees in Jordan were "vulnerable to food insecurity," and 22 percent were "food insecure" with female-headed households suffering some of the greatest deprivation.
Amal, following the example of fellow refugees, registered with the UNHCR, according to her papers, and numerous charities upon arriving in Jordan. She received a modest food voucher for 30 Jordanian dinars (roughly $50) per month. For a time, Amal found shelter in the Jordanian city of Salt with in-laws, where she lived in a fugue state and subsisted on U.N. aid. Later, when her relatives left Jordan, Amal faced the dreaded prospect of transferring to one of Jordan's overcrowded refugee camps. "I had no hope," Amal recalled.
In early 2015, however, Amal's fate took a rare, fortunate turn. Her application for housing assistance won her a spot at Karama, which had recently been expanded by the projects' sponsor, the Islamic Charity Center Society. The young mother moved in April, bringing 11 relatives with her, including her ailing mother and several nieces and nephews. An ICCS bus drove them out of Amman, past a run-down military airport, and up a rocky hill to a row of solitary, sand-colored apartment buildings. This, they told Amal, was her new home.
In her new apartment, Amal, Ma'an, and Khalid took one of the three small bedrooms. After unpacking her family's one suitcase, Amal sank to the floor. "Everything looked black, dark. There was no future," she recalls, "My soul was tired. My soul was sick." For the next several months, she would remain inside the crowded apartment where she seldom spoke and shed her tears in secret.
Amal's sons grew fitful, clinging to her at times, lashing out at others. Three-year-old Khalid was frequently awakened by nightmares of approaching planes and soldiers. "The boys would ask, 'Where's Baba? Where's Baba?' For a long time, they thought he was still in Syria. They didn't understand what death is." But, she added, "They know now."
Yousra Mofalani also struggled in the early days of her displacement. She and her sister, Somia, fled Syria for Jordan in 2012, leaving behind 10 siblings and their father's grave in the yard of their childhood home. On a winter's day in 2017, Yousra, who is 43 years old, and I strolled up Karama's single, dusty lane. Recalling the first leg of their journey, Yousra's brown eyes deepened with tears, her thick brows arching to constrain her emotion. "That was the house my father built with his hands, where we all grew up. It was harder to leave that house than to leave the country itself," she said, "Without our ahl" — one's people or family — "we feel lost."
The women spent their first months as refugees in Mafraq, where they rented a poorly maintained apartment from a Jordanian landlord at exorbitant prices. Winning a spot at Karama was a huge financial relief, but the location — far from central Amman — left them feeling more isolated than ever. "There was no one around," Somia said, "At night, it was totally dark — and so quiet." Most of their fellow residents were widows, too, many strapped with young children and ailing elderly relatives. An air of despair prevailed. "It was like life stood still. Everyone was in shock, many people were injured or had halat nafsiya" — a phrase that loosely translates to psychological problems. "We were all in shock. And for the women, they were afraid to go to town or even leave their house."
During the war, Yousra had braved the occupied streets of her city, Dera'a, during curfews to gather food for her extended family; rebuilding her life as a refugee would require a new kind of courage. "I told myself, remember how much strength you have, that God has given you," she said. "And that's what we forget — we women — how much strength we have in ourselves." As she roused herself from her depression, Yousra began searching for ways to channel this strength into agency.
A few months after her arrival at Karama, Yousra approached the ICCS administrator of the housing project, Ibrahim Salah al-Rawajeh, who goes by the honorific Abu Omar, with several requests. "I told him the women here need things to do and so do the children," she told me. "We need activities, we need to keep learning, so we can feel that our lives are not over." Abu Omar was struck by the small, vigorous woman. "She's a natural leader," he said, sitting in his cramped office at Karama. In his many years of humanitarian work, Abu Omar has become accustomed to seeing dejection and apathy. "I never thought we'd meet a woman like Yousra here. These are some of the most unfortunate refugees, and when they came, most of them looked like they had given up hope. But she had a vision." And, says Abu Omar, her vision aligned well with the goal of the ICCS: "We named this place Karama" — which means "dignity" — "for a reason: we wanted to help Syrians feel human again, by giving them control over their lives again."
Yousra's first requests were simple. She wanted permission to use the ICCS office space for community gatherings "so the women could meet and strengthen one another." She also asked Abu Omar for educational programs, pointing out that most of the Syrian children had fallen years behind their Jordanian peers in school. Together, they found qualified Syrian teachers among the Karama residents and arranged to offer remedial math, Arabic, and English classes to Karama's 90-plus school-age children. Abu Omar also gave Yousra free reign over the ICCS multipurpose room, which Yousra hoped would serve as a gathering place for the neighbors.
Coaxing the bereaved women out of their apartments would prove the largest hurdle. Even Yousra's own sister had lost heart, spending entire days lying flat on her mat, fixated on memories of her late father and lost home. Like many of her neighbors, Somia was terrified to go outside. Each morning, she implored Yousra not to leave the house. Yousra, on the other hand, had already moved on to her next campaign: lobbying Abu Omar to set up regular transportation to and from the Jordanian neighborhood where Karama's children attended school. With time, Yousra began to embark on quests of her own, taking a series of shared taxis and public buses to travel to Amman proper in search of the Islamic books she liked to study. These errands gave her a sense of power. "Even in Syria I never took the bus!" she recalled. She continued, "Every morning I'd tell Somia, 'Come on sister! You've got to get up and live your life. Just get out of bed. Do you think Allah let you survive the war for nothing? There is still so much left we can do.'"
This was Yousra's message to Amal, too, when she came knocking on her door. Yousra was struck by the young woman's pale, wilted features. "She wasn't eating," Yousra recalled. "She could barely speak." Still, Amal valiantly followed custom, inviting Yousra in, guiding her to the deflating cushions that served as the family's furniture. Over tea, Yousra gently prodded Amal with questions about her hometown, smiling when she discovered they'd both come from Dera'a. Yousra told her that many of the Karama residents came from Dera'a and urged her to join them in one of the social gatherings she and Somia organized in the multipurpose room down the road. Amal thanked her quietly and murmured the customary response, "Inshallah" — God willing. She found her visitor kind but was glad to see her go. Weeks went by. Amal stayed inside.
By the end of her first year in Karama, Yousra had knocked on each of the 55 apartment doors in the housing project. Slowly, over shared meals and endless cups of tea, she had learned the stories of her compatriots. Her bedazzled Samsung phone became the local switchboard, lighting up with everything from news of an ailing neighbor — she'd be at their bedside within hours — to speculation over the latest developments in Syria. With the support of Abu Omar, Yousra and Somia hosted several town hall meetings, polling the women on their needs and urging them to recognize the importance of organizing. "We lost our families in Syria, and so many of us are women with no men, but we can strengthen each other," Yousra explained, now sitting next to a smiling Somia in their clean, spare apartment. The smells of cooking rice and boiled chicken legs wafted from the tiny kitchen, where Isra', their sister-in-law, stooped over a double-burner. Her two young daughters quietly scribbled in a notebook nearby. "When we come together," Yousra went on, "then we can see what needs there are and we can take care of them ourselves."
Bothaina Qamar, the now-former U.N. Women official in Jordan, says this kind of community organizing is key. "Humanitarian interventions are no longer what these communities need. It's time to shift to development." And getting Syrians to participate in making decisions for themselves is crucial, she adds. "When they feel they can make a difference in their lives, and they develop a sense of self-pride."
Syrians across Jordan are finding a growing need to claim this kind of agency. With the Jordanian government beset by debt, many Syrians around the country are deprived of basic services, like sanitation, public transportation, and education. As many enter their fifth or sixth year as refugees, some Syrians, particularly in the Zaatari refugee camp, have begun forming neighborhood committees to represent their needs to local government and NGOs. Yet, so far, women are seldom included in these spaces. Women-only circles, like the one Yousra formed in Karama, are crucial entry points for women to gain a sense of confidence. "When they feel safe, they speak up," said Qamar, "and when they speak with each other, they start to recognize they have many of the same problems."
At Karama, one issue became apparent at the first meeting: There were gaggles of young children skirting between the gathered women, many of them fretful, clinging to their mothers or sucking on their thumbs with an unnatural urgency. "We realized we needed to do something for the very young children," said Yousra. "They had so much nervous energy, and because their mothers stayed inside, the children were stuck there, too. We told Abu Omar we wanted to open a preschool." After some persuasion, he granted the women permission to convert an unused garage into a classroom.
The preschool opened in 2015 with roughly two-dozen students. At first, said Somia, most of the time was spent managing the symptoms of trauma. "Children would cry, or hide in the corners, or sometimes fight," she said. "When we'd draw pictures, the drawings were always tanks, planes, blood, martyrs." The school quickly morphed into a site of psycho-social triage. The ICCS brought in social workers to instruct the teachers in the basics of counseling and art therapy. In the last year and a half, said Somia, most of the children have shown remarkable improvement. "They're changing," she said. "They've started drawing things like animals, trees, and planes — not warplanes, but planes for traveling." After hours, Somia uses the preschool's space to teach classes on self-esteem and emotional health to teenage girls.
The services for mothers have grown, too. Yousra is insistent that the women in her community continue to develop their skills and self-reliance. In 2016, the ICCS made it possible for women to apply for small loans to support at-home enterprises. One of the first recipients was Maysa Nessar, who received several grants and loans from the ICCS and affiliates, as well as relatives, totaling about 800 Jordanian dinars. She used the money to begin an at-home operation making traditional yogurt and cheese for sale in local markets. Recounting her experience to me roughly five months into the venture, the 36-year old mother of four beamed. "I've never done anything like this before," she said. "In Syria, I was just a housewife. Now I have my own business!"
Maysa considers herself blessed as one of the few women in Karama whose husband, Ahmed, is neither dead nor disappeared. However, Ahmed is paraplegic and unable to find traditional work, leaving Maysa to take the lead on many aspects of the business. "He's my partner. I never dreamed I'd say that — my husband and I are business partners," Maysa said with a laugh. She makes most of her money selling to Jordanian grocers. For her fellow Syrians, she said, she lowers the price. "Because, you, our people are in a hard situation," she explained. She has plans to expand and has apprenticed herself to a male neighbor who makes and sells pickled vegetables. "It's a lot of work, of course," she said, as she cradles her 5-year-old son. "But when you work hard, and then you see that you accomplished something — you feel like a human being."
It would be Amal's love of prayer that finally drew her out of her self-imposed exile. After their first meeting, Yousra persisted in her efforts to coax the younger woman out of her apartment, inviting her to lunches, seminars, and neighborhood meetings. Undeterred by her consistent rejections, Yousra dropped by one day to tell Amal of a new Quran class she'd organized for the women of Karama. Amal was intrigued by the prospect of learning tajweed, the art of Quranic recitation. Since childhood, Amal had practiced reading and memorizing the Quran with her uncle, and the holy book was her one remaining source of solace. "Something happens to my heart when I hear the Quran," she told me. "It makes my heart quiet down. It feels like peace." When the class met the following Friday, Amal was there, her small body fitting perfectly in the school desks Yousra borrowed from the ICCS classroom. Amid her 20 classmates, Amal's timid presence was easy to overlook.
The course was taught by Amal's neighbor, a widow who lost three sons to the Syrian war. Halfway through the class, she called on Amal to recite a portion of the Surah of Maryam. Amal's lilting, articulate voice brought a hush to the classroom. "Mashallah, she has a real gift for the tajweed," Yousra told me. A few weeks later, the teacher and Yousra asked Amal to become an instructor for a Quran class of her own, teaching younger girls. Amal agreed. Soon, she was at the ICCS center multiple times a week, teaching as well as studying, staying long after class to discuss favorite ayat, or verses, and offer girls extra pointers on their diction. Not long after, she began bringing Ma'an and Khalid to the preschool. At first, the boys clung anxiously to her knees, so Amal stayed through class to reassure them. Before long, she was helping manage other children, too. Somia saw an opportunity. "She has a gift with children," she said. Somia soon recruited Amal to join the team of single women — today eight in all — who run the school.
Now, during daylight hours, Amal is rarely at home. Her days swing by quickly, mornings and early afternoons filled with teaching duties. After work, she frequently joins her neighbors for tea, bringing her boys along to play with their own newfound friends. Often, the trio will stay for dinner, Amal joining her hosts in cramped kitchens to help create elaborate Syrian dishes. She's a faithful attendee of ICCS-sponsored classes, including a module on single parenting, and another on "life skills development." Along with Yousra and Somia, she's working toward a teacher certification, administered via Skype and annual visits by a British educational specialist. "When we finish, I'll have a diploma — a real diploma, with my name. This is an amazing thing for me," Amal said, her voice reverent. "Not just any girl in Syria could get a diploma. I can't believe that this is what Allah has brought me, even when I thought my life had ended." At this, she allowed herself a rare, private smile.
Even so, for Amal all roads still lead back to her country. "One day, inshallah, we will return to Syria," she said. "But we can't go with empty hands, weak and broken down. Syria has been destroyed, broken down to zero, less than zero. We must work on ourselves, make ourselves stronger, to rebuild our country. This is what Yousra has been teaching me."
There are still nights, she admitted, when she is shrouded again by grief, but when the morning comes, she finds courage in her sons. "Who knows why this war came to us. But I know one thing, the children did nothing wrong. So, I cannot give up. I want to finish my teaching course and then, when peace comes, go back to Syria and start a school. I want to help the children of this war get back what was stolen from them. I want them to have a future in Syria."
The United States evacuated in Syria commanders of the IG
Syria and Israel were interested in the Russian "Terminator"
From the area of Deir ez-Zor in August the Americans took out by helicopters of its air force on North SAR more than 20 fighters from Europe and close to them the terrorists. According to military-diplomatic source, this is not the first such case
More than 20 commanders of the banned terrorist group "Islamic state" (IG) was evacuated from the area of Deir ez-Zor the us military. On Thursday, September 7, reports RIA "Novosti" , citing a military-diplomatic source.
Photo: Instagram
According to him, the Pentagon intends "in other areas" use combat experience of those of ISIS.
"In particular, August 26, from the area near the village of Trap located to the North-West of the city of Deir ez-Zor, a helicopter of the U.S. air force at night was taken two field commanders of ISIS "of European origin" with family members", – told the Agency interlocutor.
In addition, on August 28 at the North of Syria, was evacuated for about 20 warlords and their entourage from the area of Alba-Watching to the South-East of Deir ez-Zor.
"It should be noted that thanks to the Americans who lost their commanders, the militants in most cases stop organized actions and abandon their positions, joining other squads or fleeing alone. All of this even more contributes to the success of the offensive the Syrian government troops in the East of Syria," – said the source.
According to him, captured after the defeat of ISIS in Deir-ez-Zor terrorists tell on interrogations that US intelligence agencies often provide support to field commanders. And the "deep involvement" in this process of the Americans, supposedly fighting against ISIL in Syria, as was during the previous administration, and after the election of Donald trump.
Also the interlocutor of the Agency says that last August the evacuation of the militants was not the first: back in may in the province of Deir ez-Zor exported commanders and mercenaries from Europe, and in June-July in the area of Raqqa.
In turn, the international coalition led by Washington, this information is called "about".
Recall, Deir ez-Zor military airport, located 2 km away, was completely surrounded by ISIS for more than 3 years. Garrison army SAR bravely all this time kept the defense, occasionally counterattacking insurgents. Food and ammunition to military and civilians threw exclusively from aircraft.
This week with the support of FSI Russian soldiers of the Syrian army broke through the encirclement from the South-West of Deir ez-Zor and joined with the defenders of the city near the barracks of the 137th mechanized brigade.
As reported today, the Deputy commander of group of forces for reconciliation in Syria, Sergei, Kurylenko, the Russian side sends at the long-suffering city another our convoy.
"It is planned to deliver food, bottled drinking water, medical supplies, mobile generators and basic necessities," said the General.
Massive White Helmets Photo Cache Proves Hollywood Gave Oscar to Terrorist Group https://clarityofsignal.com/2017/02/27/massive-white-helmets-photo-cache-proves-hollywood-gave-oscar-to-terrorist-group/
Well now you no why not wanted here sad story bull say this then you cutt off my head rape my little girls cause I'm not Islam or Muslim feel sorry no way
Thank you for this moving article.
@below: Note that the article reports on the fate and resilience of refugees instead of geopolitics.
The two subjects cannot be disconnected. There are geopolitical reasons that they are are refugees – and reasons beyond those stated in the article, which are limited to: "65,000 people disappeared by the regime, forced to enlist in Assad's army, or vanished into the underworld of government prisons"? End of story???
How about assault by ISIS forces which were supplied, indirectly or not, by CIA training camps in Jordan? Or Al Qaeda forces, supplied directly via similar CIA training bases in Turkey?
To reiterate, the geopolitics doesn't take place on some imaginary chessboard – the blood, slaughter and fleeing refugees are what the 'geopolitics' is all about. And a one-sided discussion of what led to that slaughter, that's certainly not 'independent unbiased journalism.'
Apart for my comments below this is good reporting that we seldom hear about.
It also illustrates that people are resourful. They don't need Save the Children or Care psychologists flown from London or New York to whitesplain how to live their lives. They don't need hipster film crews filming them being saved by western funded outfits, slick films later shown at fundraising galas attended by those that profited from the bombs dropped on them in the first place, for them to tearfully write checks.
I am very glad this woman escaped the violence of Obama's regime change war. I am ashamed the US funded both ISIS and Al Nusra:
Obama was so stupid he armed rebels in Syria that began to fight each other:
Good hopeful reporting.
A few questions/points:
1-Much poorer Jordan was 1000000x better than rich Saudi next door. Saudi in 2016 had 29!!!! UNHCR registered displaced persons from Syria. Yet a month ago the Saudi royal family spent $100 million (all public funds) on one single vacation in Morocco!
2-But because Jordan is not a signatory country of the UN refugee convention/protocol, what this story does not convey, is that Syrian displaced people in Jordan have few rights and are often treated like prisoners. They can not leave refugee camps, even children for medical emergencies. Borders were closed even to children in dire emergencies. Saudi did little to help, with its border closure (although they did send medical teams into Jordan more recently).
3-The other issue never reported is how people were treated by the so called "opposition" for example during the seige of Aleppo (mostly Al Nusra). Not only were injured used as negotiation chips to get medical supplies, sexual assault was rampant, including against underaged males, something that was never picked up by the media (this was buried in an UN report).
4-Will the children in the article be allowed to learn freely or will they be indoctrinated with Saudi Wahhabism/Salafism or Qatar Muslim Brotherhood propaganda?
…clarification: by "learn freely" I don't mean either stuff forced down children's throats by do good NGOs, crap that goes against traditional regional values. These NGOs are often just PR arms of owners/institutional investors in IT and arm industries that profited from this crisis.
From reading this article one wouldn't even know that ISIS and Al Qaeda were active in Syria or were the main cause so many people fled the region. Nor that they were financed heavily by Saudi Arabia and the United States. Nor that Jordon hosted a major CIA training base that trained the fighters that were fed into Syria in the so-called "civil war", supplied with money and weapons, all in a cynical attempt to destabilize the region and overthrow the government – not because of humanitarian abuses by the regime, but because Assad had turned down membership in the Israeli-Saudi group in favor of the much better economic deals that Iran was offering.
If you want to see how the U.S. media had a very positive view of Assad in 2008-2009, just watch this PBS Frontline special from 2008:
Syria and the U.S. do have some shared interests — among them is the fight against terrorism. Just after I left Syria, Damascus was wracked by a massive car bombing, the largest in decades, killing 17 people. The Assad regime blamed Islamic terrorists for the bombing. Attacks like this one point to tensions within Syria as it stands at a political crossroads and decides whether to stick with its long-standing alliances with Iran and militant groups such as Hezbollah or move toward closer ties with the West.
Well, Assad didn't cut those ties with Iran – which was offering deals on pipelines, airports, electricity, railroads – all good deals for the Syrian people, but also the reason regime change operations were intiatied by Washington, Israel, Saudi Arabia, Jordan, and friends. No, it wasn't a 'civil war' by any rational definition of the term.
Watch the 2008 PBS show, on how Assad was a great reformer bringing democratic reforms to Syria, for a lesson in how corporate media propaganda stories change with the whims of geopolitical agendas:
Perhaps their view of him changed when he started gassing his own people.
And speaking of Iran, why haven't they taken in any of the refugees from this war that they have a very active role in?
Iran has close to 1 million displaced persons from Afghanistan registered at the UNHCR, close to 30k from Iraq. You are correct there are no displaced persons from Syria in the UN database.
Some possible reasons:
Many refugees from Syria are Sunni, fleeing Syrian government control, so I don't think they would chose Iran as a destination. Those that are Shia or Alawite mostly remained in Syria.
The story about Assad gassing his own people is BS.
Firstly there were multiple attacks, not just the one Hersh claims didnt happen. Secondly your link to Hersh getting an award proves nothing.
Massive White Helmets Photo Cache Proves Hollywood Gave Oscar to Terrorist Group https://clarityofsignal.com/2017/02/27/massive-white-helmets-photo-cache-proves-hollywood-gave-oscar-to-terrorist-group/
This is great work that the ICCS and Karama and the Jordanian government are doing. Trump and the Republicans love to talk about building a wall, but this is the only wall that can really hold. The U.S. should be giving generously to offset these costs and help this project to succeed as best it possibly can, integrating these people to build a strong and stable economy for its Jordanian allies, helping what Trump says is ten times as many people as can be helped with the same amount of money in the U.S., and avoiding distracting cultural conflicts.


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subset: commoncrawl


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M. Scott Carter reports on politics, legislation and other issues from the State Capitol.
Close to 8,000 school teachers, parents and students from across the state came to the State Capitol Monday to urge the Oklahoma Legislature to increase education funding. The rally, the second in two years, lasted about two hours and featured speech from key lawmakers and state Superintendent of Public Instruction Joy Hofmeister. Lawmakers, facing a $611.3 million budget hole, have until the end of May to finalize the fiscal year 2016 budget.


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Alaskans got a good idea, Monday, January 28, of how Gov. Mike Dunleavy will budget for next year based on cuts he proposed to education for the fiscal year that started July 1, 2018.
A supplemental adjusts the budget the legislature passed in the previous session.
Typically, supplemental budgets increase spending at a time when most people are focused on the upcoming year's budget. These backdoor spending increases draw the ire of fiscal hawks.
Dunleavy's supplemental, SB 39, is an exception, cutting unrestricted general fund (UGF) operating expenditures by $10.6 million in FY 2019.
"I took office with a promise to reduce State spending, put public safety first, and renew trust in government," Dunleavy wrote in a bill transmittal letter. "To that end, I am presenting a supplemental budget for the consideration of the Legislature that returns… $5,817,200 to the General Fund."
To be clear, SB 39 does not just return $5.8 million to the general fund on balance; it cuts beyond that.
The line item that is drawing the most attention is a cut of $20 million to the Department of Education and Early Development (DEED).
"I think this is the one that has caused the most concern," Sen. Donny Olson (D-Golovin) said of the cut in a Senate Finance Committee hearing Tuesday.
As part of a compromise last year, and to prevent teachers from receiving pink slips, then-Rep. Paul Seaton (R-Homer) proposed passing the education budget separately in HB 287.
The version of HB 287 that was eventually signed into law increased FY 2019 K-12 education funding by $23 million in state funds to counteract several years of flat funding. It passed the Senate 15-4. The House concurred in a 31-9 vote.
"Last year, the Senate and House put aside partisanship and crafted an education budget that responded to public demand for increased education resources," Senate Minority Leader Tom Begich (D-Anchorage) explained in a press release. "Local schools and communities have been hit hard with the high cost of energy and the lack of inflation-proofing of our funding formula. The actions of the Governor send our education system backward, something our schools can't afford."
The supplemental also cuts $1.2 million UGF from State library operations for broadband access grants and $2 million from school bond debt reimbursement.
SB 39 uses the education cuts to offset $15 million UGF for FY 2018 Medicaid claims knowingly underfunded by the legislature.
While Dunleavy focused heavily on public safety last week during his State of the State address, John Aronno noted that the only time Dunleavy mentioned education was in reference to his own career.
"Governor Dunleavy campaigned as the education Governor, among other things. This tells me he doesn't take his own words seriously. This is not how you build public trust," Begich said in his statement.
HB 287 also forward-funded education in FY 2020 with $30 million in grants.
When Sen. Lyman Hoffman (D-Bethel) asked Office of Management and Budget (OMB) Director Donna Arduin if the Dunleavy administration intends to leave that $30 million alone, she responded tellingly, "We will be addressing that on February 13 with the rest of our Fiscal Year '20 recommendations."
Arduin: We Didn't Contact School Districts About Cuts
In addition to SB 39, Dunleavy introduced a "disaster supplemental" (SB 38) that will use $37 million UGF in FY 2019 to bring in $102 million in federal matching funds. Most of that will be spent for road repair related to the November 30 earthquake.
No Senate Finance members took issue with the disaster supplemental during Tuesday's hearing.
However, multiple senators expressed frustration with the $20 million cut to education.
Olson noted that Arduin is quoted in a press release saying the supplemental budget was crafted by "working collaboratively with Departments."
"As of this morning," Olson said, "the school districts in my area have not been contacted at all."
"No, my office has not contacted the school districts," Arduin confirmed.
Rather, OMB asked State departments for any unexpended FY 2019 funds so they can be used for earthquake relief. DEED offered the $20 million, which has not been dispersed, Arduin said.
OMB Budget Director Lacey Sanders explained that it is standard practice for DEED to hold additional funding until late January or early February until an accurate head count is made. That head count contributes to how funds are divided among districts.
Both Arduin and Sanders argued that the K-12 education formula was fully funded in last year's operating budget and that the additional funding in HB 287 was simply one-time money outside the formula.
"With all due respect, in my opinion, I think you're talking to the wrong people first. You should be talking to the school districts first to see where that money is going to be obligated," Sen. Click Bishop (R-Fairbanks) told Arduin. "Talk to them first and then talk to your agencies. Those schools, I'm sure if you would talk to them, they would have the money prioritized."
Kenai Peninsula Borough School District (KPBSD) Assistant Superintendent Dave Jones confirmed Bishop's suspicions in a letter to Senate Finance members Peter Micciche (R-Soldotna) and Gary Stevens (R-Kodiak).
Jones wrote that KPBSD budgeted for and spent $1.4 million of the $20 million scheduled for cuts in SB 39. That money restored funding for 11.5 teaching positions and three days of work for support personnel previously cut from their own budget.
"We have been employing and paying those folks since the start of the school year in August!" Jones exclaimed. "KPBSD is currently running a deficit General Fund budget that requires us to spend approximately $675,000 in fund balance. We cannot afford to be forced to spend an additional $1.4 million dollars in fund balance."
Micciche wondered if the cut caught school districts by surprise.
"It is my contention that school districts and other entities seeking money or expecting money from the State should not be anticipating spending money that has not been allocated to them," responded Arduin.
Stevens was chairing the Senate Education Committee Tuesday and couldn't attend the Senate Finance hearing, but he opened his own hearing with a message.
"Before we start, I just want to thank all of you in the audience and who are listening who are in education and in K-12 and dedicated to helping your students," Stevens said. "I know you're going through a lot of turmoil right now with this $20 million cut you may be facing, but I appreciate through all of that that you are dedicated to helping your students and seeing that they get a proper education."
Sen. Bill Wielechowski (D-Anchorage) drew a comparison to the $100 million the State paid in FY 2019 for oil and gas tax credits, asking Arduin if she considered cutting those before cutting education.
Arduin replied that the tax credits have already been paid.
Hoffman noted that the education money in HB 287 is "the law of the land." He compared the promised funding to Dunleavy's commitment to paying out full Permanent Fund dividends because that is also the law.
"Appropriations are the law of the land until we request to change them," countered Arduin. "If you pass this bill, you will have changed the law."
She told the committee that Dunleavy will wait to see what actions legislators take on the bills and ultimately could keep the $20 million for education.
However, Article II, Section 15 of the Alaska Constitution gives Dunleavy line-item veto authority. The legislature could restore the funding, pass the bill, and still watch Dunleavy veto the $20 million.
Sen. Hoffman: Cut to VPSOs "Creating Two Different Classes of People in Alaska"
Arduin and Sanders did not know which districts might be affected by the $2 million reduction in school bond debt reimbursement or whether cutting $1.2 million from broadband access grants might cost federal matching funds.
They similarly didn't know why funding for fire suppression chemical mitigation, a $9.4 million line item, needs to be in the supplemental budget or how many airports that used the chemicals might need to be cleaned.
In his transmittal letter, Dunleavy writes that SB 39 returns $5.8 million to the general fund. $5 million of that total comes via a reappropriation from the Alaska Liquified Natural Gas Project Fund. The remaining $800,000 comes from Department of Military and Veterans' Affairs capital projects.
Sanders told Hoffman that if SB 39 did not reappropriate the $5 million from the gasline, the money would simply remain in the fund.
This means the $10.6 million in cuts advertised by OMB is technically accurate, but could be considered inflated by the $5 million. The OMB representatives testified that the Alaska Gasline Development Corporation (AGDC) does not intend to spend that money this year.
"If money that's not being used is pulled from various different agencies, there could be potential ramifications of behavior by particular agencies to spend the money to the degree that it's allowable," worried Sen. Natasha von Imhof (R-Anchorage).
Arduin reiterated that departments are offering this money because they will not be using it.
In addition to education, SB 39 cuts $3 million from the Village Public Safety Officer (VPSO) program, applying those funds to a $3.5 million increase for Alaska State Troopers. Unlike the gasline funds, VPSO funds would lapse at the end of the fiscal year if unspent.
Arduin told committee members that all FY 2019 unspent funds scheduled to lapse were reappropriated in SB 39, per the various departments.
"So your testimony is that this is the only item in the entire budget that is going to lapse?" Wielechowski asked, referring to the VPSOs.
Arduin equivocated, saying that that is the best information OMB currently has, but they may update it later in the year.
Sanders said shifting VPSO funding to the Troopers was in response to conversations last session about the Troopers' difficulty in recruitment and retention.
"Supplemental budgets are meant to take care of unforeseen expenses (earthquake repairs) not take away funds mid fiscal year. Taking money from schools and VPSO mid spending year is poor policy," freshman Rep. Sara Hannan (D-Juneau) tweeted.
Also responding to the VPSO cut, Sen. Scott Kawasaki (D-Fairbanks) asked in a tweet, "Why is a life of a rural Alaskan not worth as much as any other?"
Hoffman expounded on that thought Tuesday, saying VPSOs have the same difficulty recruiting and retaining people because salaries are too low. Like the Troopers, their concerns should be addressed by looking at the source of the problem.
"It's not that I don't believe that people that are providing the services in a far flung village that may be at least one day away, or maybe three to four days away because of weather, are being disenfranchised from services because those positions aren't filled; the problem is that the recruitment of these positions needs to be upscaled," Hoffman argued.
Cutting the VPSO program is "creating two different classes of people in Alaska that need the protection that is due them," Hoffman told Arduin and Sanders.
"If you were living in that community for a year, and we had someone going out and shooting up the place and you did not have an officer to go to talk to, I think you would feel as unsafe as they do," he continued.
"Taking the money at this time is short-sighted and does not do justice to the services that are required for the people in the far flung corners of Alaska," Hoffman concluded. "I know for a fact that I will not support reducing the program. I will support working with the people of Alaska so that all people of Alaska feel safe."
Olson referenced the killing of ten-year-old Ashley Johnson-Barr in Kotzebue last year, trying to reconcile Dunleavy's claims that public safety is his top priority while he also cuts VPSOs.
Ashley's father, Sootty Barr, was an invited guest during Dunleavy's State of the State address. Dunleavy later appointed him to the Executive Clemency Advisory Committee.
Bishop said that returning to a defined benefit retirement plan, like a pension, would make Trooper and VPSO recruitment and retention problems go away.
"If we need it, we should fund it," Sen. Mike Shower (R-Wasilla) declared. But Shower asked OMB to provide data showing a pension would make the difference before taking that kind of action.
Senate Finance held SB 38 and SB 39. Senate Finance Co-chair Bert Stedman (R-Sitka) said the committee is unlikely to move the bills in the next couple weeks.
Near the end of the hearing, von Imhof wondered how legislators will agree to $1.6 billion in expected cuts when $25 million produced such a "spirited discussion."
This article brought to you by Randy Watson and Sexual Chocolate performing "The Greatest Love of All."


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|main menu | standard categories | authors | new stories | search | links | settings | author tools
|My First Easy-Bake Oven (standard:other, 758 words)
|Author: MaryG
|Added: Jun 25 2002
|Views/Reads: 2270/1
|Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
|This is a story I wrote about my soul sisters. It is a true story and still, when I read it, I smile.
Do you remember candy necklaces and wax lips? How about those paper tubes filled with flavored sugar? Here's one everyone remembers...the Easy-Bake Oven. Bet you got one for Christmas. You did? I never did. Well, that's only half-true. One day, while at work, my very dear, close friends Dialary, Cynthia, Claudia and I were reminiscing about the old days. During breaktime, the four of us were talking about the simple things in life. Each of us added something to the conversation and laughing as we recalled those days. We spoke of Christmas time and the gifts we received. Then Cynthia mentions the Easy-Bake Oven. "You got an Easy-Bake Oven for Christmas?" I said to Cynthia with astonishment, pretending to act sad like a disappointed child. I looked at each of them as they all delighted in letting me know; of course they got an Easy-Bake Oven for Christmas. Didn't you get one? "No," I said sadly, still playing the part of a hurt child. Half smiling, I watched their felicity, for now they had something to tease me with. I knew they would and I knew it would not end here. For several months, it became the joke between the four of us. When we all gathered together for a break, someone from the group would bring up the Easy-Bake Oven. We knew someone would, it was just a matter of time. Cynthia would first tease, then Claudia would brag about the toy oven and we would all laugh together. If anyone joined the conversation, someone from the group would find a way to ask that person if they ever had an Easy-Bake Oven. I watched their smiles as they waited for the answer. Of course, it was always yes. I would then show my melancholy face and everyone would burst into laughter. We never grew tired with the running joke. Soon Christmas was upon us and we all seem to forget about our little joke as we prepared for the holiday. The four of us exchanged gifts and felt the warm, wonderful friendship we had formed. We worked together as nurses, sharing our joy and sadness with each other. We knew our friendship was something special and the splendor of the holiday seems to enhance the warm, loving feeling. We all planned to meet at the Christmas party someone was throwing at work. When we all arrived, Cynthia asked Claudia and Dialary if it was time. I did not know what they meant by that, but Dialary grabbed my hand and we all headed outside to Cynthia's car. She opened the door, made me close my eyes and placed a large present in my arms. I opened my eyes, then the package and in my arms I held an Easy-Bake Oven! My eyes filled with tears as I looked at the box. "I'm 44 years old and I finally got an Easy-Bake Oven," I said. We all laughed and hugged each other. Reflecting on that time, I realized that love between friends is forever true. Their spirit and soul is forever present and will remain there. Even though it was a joke and we had so much fun with it, I can not help but wonder if they truly thought I was sad about the Oven. I did not want to ruin the fun we had with it so I did not ask. I did not know how to thank my friends in the special way they made me feel. A thank you card did not seem to be enough to say how I felt. So instead, I thought of the only way I could tell them thank you. I wrote a poem for them. Christmas time, a joyous time Opening presents to find what's mine I ripped the packages and what do I see Fussy slippers and a flannel gown for me Dolls and a tea set, clothes and jewels There must be a mistake, Santa could not be that cruel I hold back a tear There's always next year As I watch my friends all in good cheer They stirred and mixed as they licked their chins All so happy with they're lucky grins We ate the cakes and muffins made with fun I prayed it break and then I'd run But each year the same ole thing Doesn't Santa know what to bring? Time has past and I am 44 But there is one thing I know for shor'. My sister- friends showed their lovin' When they bought me my first Easy-Bake oven. MaryG Tweet
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At La Pourvoirie du Lac Berval, fishing continues until early November … fishing is very good and the scenery is beautiful. If you never tried the fall fishing it's time to book, you will not be disappointed! For the regular one, be sure to reserve your spot!
Monthly Archives: November 2015
Book your winter stay before December 1st 2016 in one of our beautiful log cabins and your heated hut will be free for the duration of your stay. *** Normally $ 30 / day *** Available only with lodging package


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View All
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7/B Anand Industrial Estate, Near ITS College, Mohan Nagar, , Uttar Pradesh 201007
Pain in different joints and parts of the body Lack of concentration Anaemia Pain in Testicles Weakness, Dullness and Fatigue Indigestion and constipation Poor quality of slee It is a common condition found in men of young age however today's lifestyle and modern changes of distractions has made it common in older age men also. As it is a common problem there is no need to worry until and unless it starts happening very frequently or more than 4-5 times in a month. If the number arises it is recommended to consult a doctor to pursue proper medication and treatment as having frequent night emission can bring various health problems.
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Features Treatment is ayurvedic No side effects Person of all ages can take this Timely results Finding white discharge with sticky consistency in your undergarments after waking up from sleep surely signifies occurrence of nightfall. Pain in different joints of your body, anemia, lack of concentration, weakness, fatigue, stress, dullness, poor quality of sleep, indigestion and constipation are other symptoms denoting that you are suffering from nightfall.
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There are various misconceptions about nightfall which may mislead a huge percentage of men, so let's have a better understanding of what Nightfall actually is all about? As men reach out to attain their age of puberty after childhood their body also tends to go through various hormonal changes and nightfall is one of them. Also known as wet dreams or nocturnal emission it is a natural process of alleviating sexual arousal from the body itself through involuntary ejaculation of semen during sleep at night. It is a very common sexual disorder and most of the men think of experiencing wet dreams may cause sexual disorders which is considerable if you start getting nightfall 3-4 times in a month as it brings sexual weakness and impotence.
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Loss of Libido is a common problem found in men which refers to diminished sexual desire towards your partner leading to decreased sexual activity. However men are known to be very sexually active still one out of every five men of age 45 and above suffers from low sexual desire at some phase of life for different reasons. It is a matter of concern if no arousal for sexual encounters occurs for several days, weeks or even months. Having no sexual desire at all may give rise to various relationship issues, depression, lack of confidence, stress and anger which ultimately crashes your marital life.
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In the course of sexual activity, satisfaction is requisite with both the partners. However, in the dysfunction know as Premature Ejaculation, there happens to an uncontrolled ejaculation either before or just after sexual penetration. The result is unsatisfactory sex for both the partners. It is an immensely common form of male sexual dysfunction. It is most of the instances observed that with age this is a common occurrence. And, then there are also medications whose side effect result in this.
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ED can be defined as a physical condition when a male is unable to establish erection in reproductive organ or if the erection occurs it doesn't stays longer enough to complete the sexual activity and till the partner achieves satisfying orgasm. Erectile dysfunction is very common in men crossing the age of 40 years as about one in five men is suffering from disorder. However nowadays younger men are also seen consulting doctors for the treatment.
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Stranger Things co-creator Ross Duffer has admitted that the character of Eleven was originally meant to die and not return at the end of season 1.
The hit Netflix show recently aired its second season on the streaming service, with Millie Bobby Brown's fan favourite character Eleven returning early on despite appearing to have been killed off at the end of the first season.
During a recent Q&A at Chapman University in California, Duffer reportedly said: "Maybe I shouldn't say this because I like to pretend that it was all planned out, but [the show] was originally pitched as a limited series. So it was like, Eleven was gonna sacrifice herself and save the world and then that was gonna be it."
Duffer went on to reveal that they had made vague plans for a second season before even shooting the first but that Eleven wasn't part of them. "[Netflix] were like, 'Well, we like this but how could it keep going?' And you're just sort of riffing in the moment and we were like, 'Well Will's back from this other dimension and he's not doing well,' and they were like, 'Great!'"
Speaking about a third season of the show, Duffer promised more air time for Lucas' sister Erica. "'We got to use more Erica' – that was one of the first things we said in the writers' room," he said.
Meanwhile, Millie Bobby Brown has revealed that she nearly gave up acting altogether before landing a part in the Netflix show.
Following minor roles in NCIS, Modern Family and Grey's Anatomy, Brown lost out on a part in X-Men spin-off film Logan. It led her to reconsider her fledgling career until Stranger Things came along.
"I felt at one point I couldn't do it [any more], but then I got [Stranger Things] and everything changed," she said, adding that acting is now "like breathing to me."


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Altogether seven petroleum organisations – BPCL, GAIL, HPCL, IOCL, NRL, ONGC and host OIL are participating in the meet.
Several top ranking national players like India No. 1 Ramkumar Ramanathan, Rohan Bopanna, Saketh Myneni, Vishnu Vardhan, Rushmi Chakravarthi, Prerna Bhambri, Ankita Raina, among others are taking part in the championship. The tournament features nine categories.
OIL is hosting this tournament with the All Assam Tennis Association providing the technical support.
Inaugurating the championship, Bora said that it will be a tough contest as all the leading players of the nation are taking part in it. He praised all the players and officials as despite working hard for their respective companies they are maintaining their game and providing service to the nation and their companies as well.
PSPB joint secretary thanked all the participating teams and hoped for a good show during this five-day high voltage tennis tournament.
Organising chairman Mishra welcomed the gathering while HC Bora offered the vote of thanks.
Today's results: (Veterans) Asim Kumar Baruah (OIL) bt Ratul Borah (HPCL) 6-1, 7-5; Hakim Ali (OIL) bt Y Ramesh Babu (HPCL) 6-2, 6-0; Jayanta Dutta (NRL) bt S Venkatesh (IOCL) 6-0, 6-2; Pratul Kumar Saikia (NRL) bt S Rajora (IOCL) 6-3, 6-4; Santosh Kumar (ONGC) bt SN Sharma (GAIL) 6-0, 6-1; Rakesh Sharma (GAIL) bt Bor Pujari (ONGC) 6-2, 7-6(5). (Men's) Vijay Sundar (GAIL) bt Raj Kumar (HPCL) 6-0, 6-2; Saketh Myneni (GAIL) bt Anup Toppo (HPCL) 6-0, 6-1; Anshuman Dutta (OIL) bt Jhitanta Rabha (NRL) 6-0, 6-0; CS Mohanty (OIL) bt Subul Haloi (NRL) 6-0, 6-0; Dhruv Sunish (IOCL) bt Dhruba Jyoti Hazarika (OIL) 6-0, 6-0; Sumit Nagal (IOCL) bt Lukrak Niling (OIL) 6-0, 6-0. (Women's) Sneha Reddy (GAIL) bt Nidhi Chilumula (IOCL) 6-4, 6-2; Riya Bhatia (IOCL) bt Prerna Bhambri (GAIL) 6-2, 6-0. (Women's doubles) Riya Bhatia (IOCL)/Prarthana Thombare (IOCL) bt Sneha Reddy (GAIL)/Prerna Bhambri (GAIL) 6-6 (Conceded). (Men's doubles) Bor Pujari/Bangari HM (ONGC) bt Rakesh Sharma/Anand Makwana (GAIL) 6-2, 6-2.


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Ford Notes and Quotes
Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series (MENCS)
Can-Am 500 Advance (ISM Raceway, Avondale, AZ.)
Friday, November 9, 2018
Joey Logano and Austin Cindric both participated in an event last night at the Penske Museum in which MoneyLion was introduced as a sponsor for the 2019 season. Both drivers answered questions from the media about the new deal and other issues concerning their respective Playoff chances this weekend at ISM Raceway.
JOEY LOGANO, No. 22 Shell/Pennzoil Ford Fusion – YOU'RE STILL THE ONLY ONE LOCKED IN TO HOMESTEAD. "Yeah, I guess it's the same as last week going into that race. Obviously, things happen in our sport. Everyone pushes hard and it's nothing new. It's been here forever. We like making a big deal out of it, a big stink out of it, but honestly it's part of our sport but there are a lot more items on our cars than there is in football. As competitors we push to that edge and sometimes we go a little over the edge and sometimes it's all about the way you interpret the rulebook could be the difference. I think NASCAR does a good job enforcing that rulebook and probably better lately more than it has been in a long time, so they should be proud of that. They have to make these things. I don't think anyone wants to make these calls in our sport at all, but I think you have to to keep everything in control. It doesn't' change anything for us. We're still focused hard at Miami. We're gonna have a little fun out here in Phoenix and try to grab a win here, but still for us we're focused in on grabbing that championship when we get to Miami."
DO YOU EXPECT TO SEE ANY HICCUPS FROM THE 4 TEAM CONSIDERING THEY DON'T HAVE THEIR REGULAR CREW CHIEF AND CAR CHIEF THIS WEEK OR NEXT WEEK? "There can be. I think, honestly, it's a pretty strong race team. They've been one of the fastest cars, if not the fastest car, all year long. I think if thsre's gonna be a hiccup it's not gonna be on Kevin's part. I think Kevin is the type of driver that rises to the occasion. We've seen that happen a lot of times, but I think there can be a hiccup in communication. You guys know how it is when you know somebody for a very long time you can almost look at them and know what they're thinking or hear in their tone maybe during the race and that's not really gonna be there. Obviously, they'll be in communication with Rodney, but it's not gonna be very quick by the time it goes one way or the other and you know the way things get lost in translation sometimes on the phone compared to being face-to-face. You're gonna have those situations, and it's for the next two races. I'd say it's a big hit for them, but I'd also feel like that car is going to make it through as fast as they are and going to their best race track."
WHEN YOU HEAR NASCAR SAY IT WAS BLACK AND WHITE, IT WAS A CLEAR-CUT VIOLATION WHAT GOES THROUGH YOUR MIND? "I don't know what it was, I just know it was a spoiler infraction. I don't know anything more than that. They were pushing pretty hard obviously."
IT WAS MOUNTED 3/8 OF AN INCH TO THE RIGHT. "So that's public knowledge. I didn't know all that, but now you know the specifics. OK, I don't know what you want me to tell you. It's not my race team. It's not my race car. I don't' know what you want me to tell you guys. I'm still gonna drive my race car this weekend whether every race car gets dq'd or not. It doesn't make a difference to me."
BUT DO YOU GO BACK AND WONDER IF THEY'VE BEEN DOING IT ALL YEAR? "No. I mean, I don't know. They could have been doing it all year or that could have been the first time. I don't know. Does it change my race car any? No, so it doesn't affect me. I don't worry about it that much. I heard about it. I think we were all in shock. I was in shock. I was like, 'Wow, that's huge.' And I'm sure everyone here thought the same thing, but does it really affect my life? Nope, so I just move on."
A LOT OF PEOPLE SAY THIS PENALTY SURPASSES YOUR PENALTY FROM RICHMOND AND OPENS THE DOOR FOR BEING THE BIGGEST PENALTY IN NASCAR HISTORY. WOULD YOU AGREE? "It's pretty big. It could be. It depends on how the last two races go, right? You could call it the biggest one ever if the don't make it to Miami, I guess, and you could probably say that. If they are still able to make it to Miami, then it probably wasn't a huge deal, but I'm sure they're a lot less comfortable going into this race than after last week's race."
DO YOU THINK NASCAR NEEDS TO JUST SET BLACK AND WHITE RULES AS OPPOSED TO LEAVING ROOM FOR INTERPRETATION? "There are a lot of black and white rules I think the sport does a good job enforcing. Can we be better? Yeah, we can be better at everything we do. I can be a better driver, too. I think that's just the way people are. We're constantly trying to find ways to be better. How can you be a better reporter? How can you be a better driver or better marketing person. Whatever it is, you're trying to be better at it, so can we do better as a sport? Of course. Are we doing bad? No, I don't think so. There's got to be a little bit of room within the rules to have some racing though. I think there are some things that need to be black and white and there are some things that we need to race within the tolerances and as long as those tolerances are black and white, then we can play within those and build cars faster than others. I don't think a Roger Penske or a Rick Hendrick or a Joe Gibbs or any of those guys want all the cars to be the same speed. I think that just kind of takes it out of all the race teams' hands. That's the competitive advantage we work for all week long. If we all drove the same race car, we'd just show up on Sunday and race and not practice our cars and not do anything, but I think part of our sport is that we have some tolerances and we need to keep that, but we also need to enforce like we've been doing the things that can't be messed with."
WITH ALL THE TALK ABOUT THE BIG THREE THIS YEAR WE'RE ONE WEEK AWAY FROM THE BIG FINALE AND YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE LOCKED IN. "If I would have told you that 15 weeks ago would you have believed me? I wouldn't either. (laughing) BUT YOU ALSO BY A SIGNIFICANT MARGIN HAVE SCORED MORE POINTS IN THE FIRST EIGHT RACES THAN ANYONE ELSE. "I did not know that." IS THERE ANY REASON WHY PEOPLE SHOULDN'T CONSIDER YOU AS MUCH A CONTENDER AS ANYONE ELSE WHO ENDS UP IN IT? "Honestly, it's funny I was talking with Todd on the way out here and I told him I said, 'When the Playoffs started I kind of felt like we were an underdog of making it and honestly the last six or seven weeks we've led a lot more laps, we've won a lot of stages, won a race, was fast at Kansas, was fast at Texas, you know what, I think we're the favorite now to win now.' And I think it's so crazy to think that it can change that quick, but we are the one team that has been able to say we're locked in the last couple of weeks. I can promise you, I haven't watched no Phoenix tape when I flew out here. I was focused on one race."
THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE'VE SEEN THE MUSTANG FOR NEXT YEAR WRAPPED UP IN TEAM COLORS. WHAT DO YOU THINK? "I think it's super-cool. The body lines are cool. It makes sense to race the Mustang. To me, I want to race a sports car and that's what it is. I'm excited about that. Obviously, the couple or races that MoneyLion is gonna be on it is gonna be really exciting for us. Like I said when I was up there, to have a financial tech company that hasn't been in our sport before that's super-exciting. That, to me, is a huge story for you guys and for all of us in the sport to break out into something new like this. Penske does a great job of working all those B2B deals, but also finding some great marketing tools for them to really get a return on their investment, so I'm excited about that. I'm excited to be part of it and definitely a great group. I will say that when I talked to them the first couple of times they were very green to our sport, didn't know much about it, but I think we've turned them into diehard race fans already with some great perks like I spoke about – the five percent cash back on a lot of the purchases at the race track and NASCAR.com. I think a lot of that are creative ways to market and also help our race fans out that really make our sport go round in the first place."
WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED AS A PERSON FROM HOMESTEAD IN 2016 TO NOT BEING IN IT IN 2017? "I'm always gonna enjoy the opportunity. That's the kind of person I am. I love life. Every morning I wake up and think this is a little ridiculous. There's no way I get to drive a race car for a living and I'm racing for a championship. Does it make it hard last year when we didn't make it? Yeah. Was it harder to put a smile on my face? Yeah, I had to convince myself to smile sometimes because there were times I was very frustrated as I think anyone would be, but I also still get to drive a race car that weekend and that's still pretty kick ass, so I think, to me, I remind myself of that every day. My family helps me a lot with all that and, obviously, what have I learned? Don't take anything for granted that you're gonna make the Playoffs next year after you finish second the season before. You think that's kind of a given and it's not, so I think I got some really good check-ups on that and some great lessons on approaches to the weekend and mentally being tough. There have been a lot of things I might have been able to learn and I'm looking forward to the lessons ahead because there are gonna be plenty of them. I know over the last 10 years of my career from where I was when I started to where I am now I'm proud of that. It's something that I think is great, but I also don't hang my hat on that either because I'm not where I want to be yet."
DO YOU NOTICE MORE FAN SUPPORT? THEY SEEM TO APPRECIATE THE FACT YOU'RE GOING TO GO OUT THERE AND GIVE IT YOUR ALL EVERY RACE AND NOT BACK DOWN. "Our sport was built on tough racing and, like I said, I'm gonna race hard. I'm a racer. That's what I am. I can be a hard racer and smile when I get out of the car. There's nothing wrong with that. It might look maybe not as real or authentic as a lot of people think, but that's really who I am. I can flip a switch and put a helmet on and go racing and then by happy about life afterwards and I'm out there to win. That's who I am. I've got one gear when I get in a race car and it's not letting people go a lot of times, it's to go win the race. To be a good race car driver a lot of times you have to be selfish, you've got to think about what's best for your race team and I think that's kind of the approach I've taken over the years and I will say that once I started racing that way I've won a lot more races – not a championship yet, but we've been close a couple of times and hopefully this is the time."
YOUR TEAM WAS PROBABLY NEVER BETTER THAN THE YEAR KENSETH DUMPED YOU. "I would agree with that." BETWEEN THE YEAR YOU AND CARL GOT TOGETHER AT HOMESTEAD, WHAT DO YOU TAKE AWAY FROM THOSE SITUATIONS TO HOMESTEAD NEXT WEEKEND WITH EVERYTHING ON THE LINE? "It's just experience. I think this is normal for everyone, but when you go into a situation you've never been through before you can't help but be nervous because you don't know what's coming. Like even media day. You go up there and you're kind of getting thrown to the wolves. It's like, 'What am I gonna say?' And there's just so much drama and questions coming at you and you don't know how to handle that and you get to the race track and all that goes through your mind is, 'I've got a chance to win a championship. I can win a NASCAR championship' and you can get lost in those thoughts too easily sometimes. I think after going through that once, twice and now even for a third time you still have that thought go through your mind that you have another great shot at becoming a NASCAR champion, which has been a lifelong goal since I was a kid, but I guess I find myself a little more relaxed knowing that I've been here before, I've done it before, I know how to handle the situations, I know how to race at the race track, I know my team has done it before. It's not like it's a new race team that hasn't been in this situation before. Almost our whole race team has been in all three of them, a majority of us has been, so I think that gives me a lot of confidence and it should give my race team a lot of confidence too that we've been here before. We know what to do, we know how to fight for it, so we've been really close. We've been closer every time we've done it, so hopefully one more time."
HOW FAR HAVE YOU COME FROM THAT MOMENT AT POCONO WHEN YOU SAID DELANA WEARS THE FIRESUIT IN THE FAMILY TO WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW? "You know how you say there are no regrets? I regret saying that (laughing)." WHY DO YOU REGRET IT? "Because you're not supposed to take things personal like that. You make it personal like that and that's just wrong, but, hey, you laugh about it but you also get embarrassed by it. When you're 19 years old, and I'm pretty sure when you were all 19 years old you said something stupid it's just that mine was on national television and quite the quote. Anyways, I've learned a lot from that moment until now, but, like I said, I'm still 28 years old and I don't think there is any 28 year old that knows everything at that point. I'm still young and got a lot ahead of me and a lot of mistakes I'm going to make and I look forward to those mistakes. I'm gonna learn a lot from them when they come."
WHY DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE BEEN PICKED ON BY OTHER DRIVERS? WHY DO THEY THINK THEY EXPECT YOU TO ROLL OVER OR GET OUT OF THE WAY OR THAT THEY CAN SHOVE YOU AROUND? WHY DO YOU THINK THAT IS? "I don't know if that's the case. I don't know. I think for whatever reason a lot of the situations I've been in have been pretty popular with higher profile drivers and things like that that make it look bigger, but I don't really think I've been in more run-ins than most drivers. When you think about, we're racing against the same drivers every week. You're bound to run into each other and make somebody mad. It happens every race to somebody. Somebody is mad at somebody all the time it just doesn't go out in public. Mine, really every one of them has, so learn how to handle them better I guess."
ARE YOU TOUGHER? "It makes you pretty tough. It makes you tough as nails."
WHAT WAS YOUR MOST CHALLENGING? SOMETHING WITH SMOKE? SOMETHING WITH HARVICK, KENSETH? "That was probably the toughest one, obviously. But I will say that I've learned how to handle situations like that and a lot of times, like I said, you've got to go through things to learn things sometimes and you just have to learn things the hard way. It's not the fun way to learn things the hard way, but you do and not only does that help you on the race track, but for the rest of my life I'll be able to take those lessons with me. Even though it's on a race track and you may think it doesn't correlate to anything else it really does. There's a lot of transfer."
THE YEAR YOU HAD THE INCIDENT WITH KENSETH DO YOU THINK THAT WAS YOUR BEST SHOT TO WIN THE TITLE? "It's hard to say, we didn't get there. We won a lot of races that year and it looked like we were gonna win Martinsville that year, which would have put us in a great spot for Miami. Could we have won it that year? Yeah, I'd like to think we could have, but you don't know unless you're there, but I'd like to think my shot this year is as good as it's ever been."
BUT YOU DON'T LOOK BACK ON THAT YEAR AS ONE THAT WAS LOST? "Yeah, it was lost. Of course it's lost. We didn't win."
ARE THEY ALL THAT WAY THOUGH? "Yeah. If you don't win, you lose. What do they say if you're not first, you're last? Isn't that what they say? I think you can be second, but I'd rather not be."
YOU'VE BEEN IN THIS SPORT 10 YEARS NOW WITHOUT A CHAMPIONSHIP, SO HOW DO YOU LOOK AT THAT? IS IT DISAPPOINTMENT OR JUST SUCH AN ARDUOUS JOURNEY? "The goal is to win championships, no doubt. The goal is there. Am I bummed that I haven't got one yet? Yeah, I am, but we've been really close and I'm proud of that. There's a lot of these races you look at and you can look at the amount of points you've scored in the Playoffs, we've done a great job of raising our game when it comes to Playoff time and we've done that every year and that's something I'm probably most proud of and the way the championship is now, obviously, it takes a lot to get there and it takes a lot to get to Miami, but anything can happen in one race whereas before you could set yourself up like you said I had 40 points more than the next person. Well, man, if you've got a 40-point cushion going into the last two races you're feeling pretty good about that and now, yeah, it gets you there, but now I'm at zero with the other three and it comes down to one race, which is great. I'm not saying anything bad about our Playoff system. I love it. I think it's super-cool and it's fun to be a part of. It's fun to watch. Last year it was fun to watch even though we weren't a part of it, but I don't know if it makes it more challenging or not, but it comes down to one race which just makes it different. Like I said, we've been close and had some big moves and had that situation with Carl and if things change a couple inches a different way and we win the championship or that caution doesn't come out when we had that restart after that, maybe we could have passed the 48 and we would have won that race. We'll never know, but it all comes down to situations in that final race, which is crazy."
SO HOW DO YOU NOT DRIVE YOURSELF CRAZY? "Because you can't, you just can't. It's easy to overthink things and have it on your mind. Even coming out here we watched the 2016 race. I don't know why, but I did. Todd and I were watching it together and every time I watch that race I get so mad I slam my laptop closed. It's like, you're that close and I don't want to watch that again, but there are lessons to be learned in there. You think about it. That moment will forever be burned into my mind of how close we were to winning a championship that day, but we've got another opportunity to right that, so here we go."
WHAT WAS THE LESSON LEARNED? "I think we did a good job the way we played the race and the way I played the race in not moving up I think it kind of cost us a little bit, put us in a different situation. The last restart I just did what I had to do and Carl did what he had to do, so there was really nothing back there, but just watching the restarts and watching the little things that could be better at, but I thought we did a really good job that weekend in all honesty. I thought we kind of approached it good. We had decent speed. We didn't qualify well, but we ran up front and led laps, so I think we did a lot of good thing, but there are obviously things we can do better."
WHAT DID YOU LEARN FROM 2014 to 2016 AND HOW TO TREAT THAT WEEKEND? "Just enjoy it, relax and have fun. Honestly, I think you're more relaxed, you've been through it before. You know what's coming at you and the more you can just tell yourself it's another race because it really is just another race. There's a lot more on the line, but it's just another race. You've still got to go out there and win either way, so nothing really changes. Is your season on the line in one race? Yeah, it sure is, but it is every race a lot of times, especially with this Playoff system."
HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE THE ONLY ONE LOCKED IN NOW? "It caught me by surprise, for sure. I said 15 weeks ago I said we were an underdog and I would be surprised if we made it to the final four and now I feel like we are the favorites to win this thing. It's crazy how things change."
DOES THE CHAOS WITH THE REST OF IT HELP YOU GUYS? "Yes, it does because we're focused in on one race for the last two weeks and other teams really have to focus in on getting there first. Instead of working on just one car, they had to work on three cars to get in and then another one on top of that for Miami. It's not that we're not working on our car for this week. We still want to run well, but that extra time in going to the wind tunnel and doing all that stuff to make sure the Miami car is the best we can possibly make it that's a huge advantage to winning Martinsville."
AUSTIN CINDRIC, No. 22 Discount Tire Ford Mustang – HAS IT BEEN EASY TO FORGET ABOUT THE LAST TWO RACES AFTER EVERYTHING YOU'VE GONE THROUGH THIS SEASON? "I still can't get over the entire race from Texas. That whole weekend was absolutely insane and to say that we had a sniff at win at the end there would have been awesome, but, like I said you've got to have a short memory and obviously Kansas pretty much ruined any hopes I had at pointing my way into owners or drivers points, which really stings, but I've got an awesome opportunity this weekend to go out and try to win a race – a must-win situation. Obviously, I'm not the only one in a must-win situation, so I'm fighting for a lot and we'll do the best we can."
HOW TOUGH WAS TEXAS WITH THE GROOVE ON THE TRACK? "It wasn't easy and I feel like there was more attrition last weekend than you would think for a repaved track that would have aged. You see every year we go to Kentucky and it's better. It's tough to put my finger on it. Obviously, I'm not a tire expert but a lot of guys talk about the tire because that's the only factor that changed since the spring race and I felt like the spring race was more raceable than when I raced there in the trucks. I personally like Texas because it's a mile-and-a-half track where you actually have to use the brakes. You have to drive it. There's a lot of factors that you can do as a driver to help yourself into turn one and anywhere you can use the brake pedal I feel like is somewhere you can make a difference as a driver, but, like I said it's really tough when you're all fighting for one groove. You're put in a lot of compromised situations and it's unfortunate that those can sometimes affect championship pictures."
WHAT ABOUT THIS RIDE FOR NEXT YEAR AND HAVING MONEYLION ON THE CAR? "For me it's a huge opportunity. Without MoneyLion this wouldn't be possible. As a young driver these are the opportunities you live for, you work for and you hope come around. This is a huge step in my career to be able to repeat and do a second season in XFINITY and be able to have the continuity of having one team around you the entire year. I'm excited for the opportunity because I think we can be a really serious contender. Obviously, there are a lot of great things to come along with the MoneyLion partnership, not only for everyone at Penske and everyone at the race team, but all the race fans. You talk about five percent cash back on tickets, five percent cash back at the track, they're giving away 1500 tickets throughout the year to their members, so there's a lot of fun things to go along with this, not only for us but for the race fans."
TWO YEARS AGO YOU CAME INTO FULL-TIME RACING EXPERIENCE, BUT DIDN'T HAVE A LOT OF STOCK CAR EXPERIENCE. WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED IN THAT TIME? "It's funny. I got to do a Continental Tire race at Road Atlanta in between the Dover and Kansas round in the Playoffs, and it was the first time I'd been in a sports car since the Daytona Rolex 24 in January, and I couldn't believe how comfortable and aggressive I was in traffic and in racing conditions and I can only credit that to NASCAR racing because you don't get that kind of close racing anywhere else, you don't get that kind of restart aggression, you don't get any of that anywhere else. You're usually racing yourself, racing the race track and in NASCAR you're constantly around other people and I feel like there's a lot to be learned in that from a social aspect as well because you're racing against the same 39 other drivers give or take all year, so those guys have to know you, those guys have to trust you, those guys have to understand whatever it takes from you and those can put you in compromised positions sometimes and sometimes it can cut you some breaks, so I feel like those have been pretty big opportunities for me this year and last year to really be able to step up and understand what that takes from that aspect of racing."
STAGE RACING WILL BE IMPORTANT NEXT YEAR. "Stage racing will be important. Stage racing will not be very important for me this weekend as I try to win the race. I'm just pumped. It's huge to have an opportunity to go out and race for another championship as I'm sitting here trying to figure out how I'm gonna race for a championship in a week's time, so I'm excited and looking forward to what's next."
WRECKERS OR CHECKERS ON SATURDAY? "How about just checkers."
HOW WOULD YOU CLASSIFY THIS YEAR? "It's gone by fast. I want to win a race before the year is over. It's been a long time since I've gone a year without winning a race and we're all here to win races, so I've got two more chances to do that this year and two more really good chances I feel like. But, for me, this year has gone by fast. It feels like only a few weeks ago I was spinning out in front of the field at Daytona and then only a week ago I was flipping in front of the field at Daytona, so I look at improving my superspeedway results next year (laughing), but it's crazy to think, perspectively, how far I've come and as a driver how far I've come in such a short amount of time and that's a credit to everyone that's been around me at Team Penske and Roush Fenway. I've had a lot of good advice from a lot of really smart people that have been doing this for a while and it's about applying that and applying that in the right scenarios and forgetting the noise and just going out and executing races."
The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of SpeedwayMedia.com.


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This book is a result of many years' contemplation. After a decade or more, and after I had written most of the book, a friend interjected how similar it was to Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's talk on the four quadrants. She had come to the same conclusion—that everyone is made up of four different aspects: physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual. I was not aware she had said anything about this. It is comforting to know there is another giant I did not even know to climb.
Through this book, I intend to share concepts and ideas I have gleaned from my life so far. My sharing should be munched on like salty chips, making you thirsty for more. Keep in mind these are my perceptions and may be skewed by my life choices and experiences.
This book is not intended to be a textbook, and any resemblance to one is unintentional. Don't look for detailed references in what I am sharing. Please view this book as a conversation between me and you. I am simply sharing what I have discovered and learned along the road of life so far.


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Hire Me
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About Me
Hi! My name is Merloze Tilme founder and CEO of Rebel Roze Miami. My passion is writing and always finding ways to be creative with words. My desire is to help job seekers who do not have the time, experience, or expertise to create interview-worthy resumes in any industry.


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<<<Chapter 1: Zoe<<<
(Introducing Cubby…)
He went round and round – not because he was chasing his tail, but because there was no space for him to do anything else. He was at the bottom of a vertical shaft that was no more than two feet in diameter. Right in the middle of it was a puddle of dirty water. It had rained last night.
Cubby tried to figure out the place. The circular dirt wall went up and above his small frame, until it opened up to show a small circle of the gray sky.
When he had fallen, he had yelped. Not deliberately. A thirty-feet fall could make a grown-up yelp like a pup – and Cubby was indeed a pup.
Later, he had barked and even howled. Terriers weren't the best in the howling department, yet he had tried.
Nothing had worked.
They were gone. They had left him behind.
But Cubby couldn't fault them with it, could he?
He had jumped out of the trailer when they had stopped the car by the side of the road. Mom wanted to take a picture for her blog and dad had popped the hood to check the coolant in the engine. Cubby had jumped out of the trailer, so that he could stretch his limbs.
OK. He was lying.
In fact, he had stolen that stretching-the-limbs expression from a TV Grandma whose name he couldn't remember. Truth be told, he had spotted a squirrel and he wanted to chase it.
By the time he had turned back, the car was gone!
At first, he thought that chasing the car wouldn't be a big deal, but after running a couple of miles, he had realized that he was wrong. There was a huge difference between the power packed by a 75 HP engine and a 0.5 DP dog.
For the first time in his life, he felt miserable and hungry – but he was an optimistic and resourceful pup. He saw some rats and geckos and his vermin-hunting genes kicked in. An hour of hunting was followed by a sumptuous dinner. That had made him smug.
He could survive on his own, couldn't he?
He didn't need those humans, did he?
His thoughts had rudely interrupted by the ground beneath him that gave way and sent him tumbling into a dark hole in the ground.
Now, almost thirty feet below the surface, sitting tight against the dirt-wall, Cubby reflected upon the last two days.
In his litter, he was the last to be adopted. The emotional bond that he shared with his adoptive family was minimal. There was a strong chance that his absence would be discovered only after they reached the motel where they had booked themselves a room for the night. So, even if they did come looking for him, it won't be until tomorrow.
If they came looking for him?
It was a big "if" that appeared to be to a gigantic, impossible to solve "IF" to three-month old Lakeland terrier pup, who could do nothing but wait for fate to take its course.
Cubby coiled himself up, rested his chin upon his front paws, and sighed.
——— ¤¤¤ ———
Somewhere else in the woods, an eleven-year old boy opened an old leather-bound notebook that had once belonged to his father.
>>>Chapter 3: The Nameless Boy and the Cave that Wasn't (Part I)>>>