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Part one of an ongoing discussion
We asked our members and affiliates to tell us how they perceive the state of diversity and inclusion — the lay of the land, so to speak — in the field of biochemistry and molecular biology. Here, we've printed what they had to say. In future issues, we will dive deeper into the discussion of what can be done in the short term and in the long term. We welcome your contributions. Email us.
I believe that inclusion of people from different racial and ethnic backgrounds in research greatly enriches both our science output and cultural awareness. For example, research on diseases relies on the diversity of patients and samples, and a diverse research team can facilitate the recruitment of diverse study participants. It is also evident that working in a multicultural environment does change our views and perceptions of other people whom we unconsciously think are different from us. Although diversity is mostly associated with race and ethnicity, a homogenous group can still be diverse in areas less often considered — like professional training, country of origin and life experiences. I think we need to start looking at diversity beyond what is visible. But this does not come to replace what diversity was initially intended: to bring members of underrepresented populations, women and other groups into science settings and participation. This diversity would not only broaden research questions and opportunities but also improve our cultural understanding for one another.
Joshua Muia is an instructor of medicine at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis.
The diversity efforts are inconsistent and only as good as those constantly reminded that they need to be inclusive in their work, committees and output. The featured speaker list for (the ASBMB annual meeting) this year is an example of a lack of diversity. Few women, fewer minorities. We all need to be reminded to be cognizant of the issue. I teach courses that include diversity in health care from a science and research perspective, and I also teach gender in science and engineering. Many ASBMB members are not trained in these areas and don't always understand how the workplace and education have changed and need to continue to change to attract and retain a diverse set of scientists.
Marilee Benore is a professor of biology and biochemistry at the University of Michigan–Dearborn.
The National Science Foundation's Women, Minorities and Persons with Disabilities in Science and Engineering report, which is released every other year, has shown a trending increase in the number of awarded STEM doctorates in the United States over the past decade. The good news is that there has been a corresponding increase in doctoral degrees awarded to African-American and Hispanic scientists. Unfortunately, over the past decade, the proportion of doctorates awarded to disabled scientists has decreased.
This is surprising because we'd think that the protections secured by the landmark Americans with Disabilities Act, passed in 1990, would have had a more positive effect after two decades. The ADA has been fairly successful with improving access to education. What the ADA hasn't been able to secure are the other ingredients essential for success: removing biases, prejudices, and discrimination; social capital in the form of professional networking; and aspirational capital in the form of successful role models.
ASBMB Today asked me if the field of biochemistry and molecular biology embraces or discourages diverse voices and experiences. I had difficulty answering this question, because the scientists who work in these fields display a spectrum of attitudes and behavior. I have been fortunate to meet and work with remarkable scientists who embrace diverse voices; I have also unfortunately met some who actively discourage these voices; but most scientists I've worked with are unaware of the challenges facing disabled scientists.
ASBMB Today also asked: Are women and minorities given a seat at most tables? I interpreted this question to mean: "Are disabled scientists proportionately represented in positions of power within the field of biochemistry and molecular biology?" Clearly, the answer is no. Fourteen percent of the population between the age of 21 and 65 is disabled; however, if you examined the composition of the biochemistry and molecular biology faculty at any university, any conference committee, or any editorial board, you will most likely not ascertain a 14 percent representation of disabled scientists.
Finally, ASBMB Today asked how having people of color, women, LBGT and differently-abled individuals at the bench or in the classroom enriches scientific perspectives. Scientists are human too, and we seek out and direct research according to our passions. By having a workforce with diverse backgrounds and perspectives, we accordingly increase the diversity of our lines of scientific research. My own research, for example, focuses on the commonest form of genetic deafness from a genomic and population genetics perspective. Previous researchers who studied this form of genetic deafness have focused on it from a diagnostic and clinical perspective. As a deaf person, I carry a natural interest in deafness that goes beyond medicalization. I believe that there are secrets in our genome about human history and disease that can be unlocked by studying genetic deafness.
Derek C. Braun is director of the biology program and the molecular genetics laboratory and a professor at Gallaudet University.
It's 2016, and the Matilda effect is alive and well.
Named after 19th century American women's activist Matilda Gage and first noted by science historian Margaret Rossiter in 1993, the term describes the systematic undervaluation of research done by women in favor of men. As documented by the RAISE project, the world's largest awardees database, men are significantly overrepresented in both award nominations and success, whereas women are underrepresented. A mere 2.5 percent of all STEM Nobel Prize winners and 2.1 percent of the prestigious mathematics Fields Medal recipients are women. Only this week, we learned that 95 percent of 2016 national awards of the American Chemical Society were awarded to men even though women made up 17 percent of the nominee pool and constitute 29 percent of the 158,000-strong membership.
Why is this a problem? Awards and prizes are widely accepted markers of professional achievement that influence salary, promotion and tenure decisions to shape and advance careers. Studies show that the gender disparity in awards is recurrent and unrelated to "pipeline" issues. Women are less likely than men of equal ability to self-promote and seek nominations because of persistent cultural beliefs in the capabilities of men and women. The prize criteria evoke strong stereotypes associated with men, calling for "leaders" and "risk-takers." Unconscious gender bias is propagated through recommendation letters, which use more standout adjectives and fewer grindstone words in describing male applicants compared with female. Most importantly, the gender composition of the awards committee has crucial effects on outcome, with success rates for women strongly tied to the number of women involved in selection.
With this background, how does the ASBMB fare? Not badly! In the past four years (2013 – 2016), 32 percent (17 out of 53) of national awards have gone to women. However, there are notable problems: Four awards have included zero women (education, Merck, Vallee, and Stadtman awards), and four have included only one (DeLano, Kirschstein, Tabor and Wang awards). A smaller number of awards are well represented by women: two of four (ASBMB Young Investigator and Shaw awards), three of four (Rose and Avanti awards) and four of four (Cohn award). We can do better. For detailed analysis of the Matilda effect and concrete guidelines on how professional societies such as the ASBMB can promote diversity and ensure gender equity, see our latest blog post on STEMWomen.net.
Rajini Rao is a professor of physiology at the Johns Hopkins University, has chaired the Committee on Professional Opportunities for Women at the Biophysical Society and is co-founder of STEMWomen.net, a blog site dedicated to promoting the careers of women in science.
Are women and minorities given a seat at most tables? The Minority Graduate Student Network was first created as a support network for minorities in graduate programs throughout New York City. Since its inception it has grown to provide professional development, career opportunities and leadership training as well. Feedback from members indicate that leadership positions within academics and industry often lack underrepresented minority representation or do not address many of the circumstances that concern minority students in the sciences. MGSN now has a reach of more than 400 local students. As the number of students voicing similar concerns within MGSN grows, it must be considered that more minority advocates in leadership positions are needed.
Rodrigo Valles Jr. is the associate program director at Hunter College, City University of New York, Center for Translational and Basic Research. He wrote on behalf of the Advisory Board of the Minority Graduate Student Network.
I've seen more appreciation for challenges that face women, LGBTQ and minority scientists in the past two years than I have seen in the prior two decades. While these groups are now being included to some degree, where I see the biggest changes are that we are doing far better at calling out harassment and bias. Even with that, I think we have yet to hear the real angst of the LGBTQ community, because it is still unsafe for many scientists to come out, as many states still don't have nondiscrimination protection and you can be fired for being gay.
While these conversations of inclusion are coming to the forefront, I worry that the problems of unconscious or conscious racial or gender bias have become more covert. I see a lot more "punching down" — where there is a real push to stabilize funding for near-retirement principal investigators or even well-established groups. It's pretty obvious that the groups that are going to be most impacted by senior PIs getting more earmarked money will be the most vulnerable junior and midtier investigators who are far more diverse. That tension hasn't been well addressed, and I don't see that the National Institutes of Health can have it both ways.
I hate that so many universities and societies seem to be reinventing the wheel for themselves and hoping that simply getting a diverse faculty on campus will solve their problems. There seems to be genuine shock that a female, LGBTQ or underrepresented minority wouldn't simply be grateful for a job. I'm always surprised when people are unaware that these folks are going to be game changers. And that's a great thing. Everyone in my lab is either a woman or from a racially underrepresented group — or both — and I couldn't wish for a better group of people. They are smart as all get-out, will ask and then answer the best questions, read everything and are crazy enthusiastic about getting work done. I love that they know there is no one else who will be effecting change and that they need to do it. You can't teach this. It comes knowing they have great obstacles and hopefully powerful cheerleaders making opportunities for them.
BethAnn McLaughlin is an assistant professor of neurology and pharmacology at Vanderbilt University and TheEdgeforScholars.Org's director of awesome.
Although gains have been made in encouraging diversity from the ground up, our efforts must be expanded from the top down. For the fields of biochemistry and molecular biology to flourish, diversity must not be just a noble goal — it must be a priority. Research fellowships targeted specifically to underrepresented minorities, along with scholarship and internship programs seeking to improve access for underrepresented minority students to universities and industry, are only the beginning. These efforts must be paired with the support and guidance of faculty and administrators. Achieving buy-in from faculty already overburdened with tenure and promotion requirements is realistically achievable only if the pursuit and maintenance of diversity in science is stated as a priority on the department, college and university levels. This becomes possible once outreach, science communication and mentoring efforts, particularly those targeted to underrepresented minorities, become required, rewarded and valued. High-quality efforts toward enhancing diversity need to become a prominent feature of our academic system, not just something that is occasionally recognized in a department newsletter or a tweet.
Rick Page is an assistant professor in the chemistry and biochemistry department at Miami University.
The thing about diversity is that there is no single definition about what makes someone diverse — we all take different paths and contribute valuable life skills and perspectives based on our journey. What we have in common is that we all deserve to be successful and the opportunity to make an impact. Never make an assumption that someone doesn't need help, even if they seem to be thriving. We all need support, but that will take different forms for different people. Some of us internalize stress or never ask for help because we don't want to feel singled out from the rest of the group. The most important question to ask of others, especially those you mentor, is "How can I help you be successful?" Then truly listen and connect us to the resources we need to ensure success, whatever that may be.
Donna Kridelbaugh is a writer, editor and career matchmaker at Science Mentor Consulting.
Although I am not a member of an underrepresented group, I do teach at a historically black college or university. Based on my experiences in the classroom and laboratory over the past 30 or so years, I can say without a doubt that diversity is critical for promoting creativity and finding solutions to problems. Science itself is a creative process. Solutions to scientific problems do not arise out of thin air but instead arise from scientists as creative agents who bring their whole personalities and all of their talents and life experiences to bear on the problem at hand. Clearly, the greater the diversity of the workforce, the greater the likelihood that creative solutions will be found. Some citizens in high places do not recognize this fact, but this could be because they are not familiar with how science works.
As proof that diversity promotes creativity, I give you the example of the great biologist Ernest Everett Just, who lived and worked in the first half of the 20th century. He proposed a theory of how cytoplasmic factors and chromosomes in the nucleus of the cell interact during embryonic development. Just's theory (of "genetic restriction") opposed the gene theory of Thomas Hunt Morgan, who later won a Nobel Prize. Recently the case has been made that Just's epigenetic theory of nuclear–cytoplasmic interaction, which has been shown to have considerable merit, bears close similarity to sociological ideas involving intercultural dialogue that were prevalent in the African-American intellectual community at the time. Because E.E. Just was immersed in this community and deeply familiar with black intellectual thought, he was perfectly positioned to put forth the unique ideas that he did. Thus, he embodies the notion that unique perspectives can spawn unique scientific contributions. Of course, what is true about ethnicity is true about any kind of characteristic or set of experiences. Diversity of all types promotes creativity and scientific problem solving.
W. Malcolm Byrnes is an associate professor of biochemistry and molecular biology at Howard University College of Medicine.
Diversity is recognizing that while we are all the same, we are also all unique and bring our unique differences to bear on what science we work on, why we work on what we work on and how we approach what we work on.
Avery August is a professor of immunology and chair of Cornell University's microbiology and immunology department in the College of Veterinary Medicine.
As the community has reacted to sexual harassment in many different forms, we are reminded of a bigger problem in all STEM fields. Gender equity is an ongoing problem especially at higher ranking positions. This results in inexcusable behavior that occurs far too often. Whether it is microaggressions or sexual harassment or a host of other offenses, it is essential to urge all individuals to carefully consider their words and actions toward others. To build a more inclusive community, we must recognize our own unconscious biases or inappropriate behaviors, take responsibility for our actions and consequently change our attitude toward others. For those who cannot treat others with the respect everyone so rightly deserves, consequences should be administered to remedy the problem.
Also, there is a distinct difference between diversity and inclusion that should be recognized in order to create an equitable landscape in any STEM field. Merriam–Webster refers to diversity as "the quality or state of having many different forms, types, ideas, etc." and "the state of having people who are different races or who have different cultures in a group or organization." Inclusion refers to "the act of including: the state of being included." You can have diverse organizations or fields, but it can be meaningless if not all individuals feel included. We need to work not only to increase diversity in STEM fields but also inclusivity, as we are unlikely to increase the first without the second.
Shaila Kotadia is the education, outreach and diversity manager for Synberc at the University of California, Berkeley.
The status of diversity and discrimination is country and time-dependent. When I immigrated to Canada 30 years ago, the professional standards related to discrimination by gender, religion, color, sexual preferences, etc. were somewhat relaxed. I have seen the progressive change of these standards from the state of "some tolerance" to a state of "zero tolerance." My current institution is very vigilant regarding issues of equality, discrimination and harassment in the workplace and is continuously educating the staff on what is acceptable and what is not. There are serious consequences for offenders, and there are professionals who listen to and handle complaints. Bottom line: There is no more a gray zone for discriminatory or abusive behavior in the workplace, and workers are encouraged to report offenders, who may get punished severely for inappropriate actions (even if such actions are purportedly intended as "jokes").
My interaction with international colleagues has confirmed repeatedly that professional standards related to diversity, discrimination and harassment are very different in other countries. I have witnessed clear cases of sexual harassment in the workplace (verbal, touching, joking, etc.) that seem to pass unnoticed by the victims. Clearly, the lack of strong directives on what is permitted and what is not permitted in the workplace encourages abusers to continue their customary behavior and discourages the abused from reporting them.
In my estimation, eventually, in most countries, institutions will adopt the principles of zero tolerance, educate all employees on what constitutes discrimination and abuse, and will open specialized offices that will deal with education, counseling and punishment of offenders. When these policies are in place, I predict that all forms of discrimination and abuse in the workplace will be highly diminished.
Eleftherios Diamandis is head of the clinical biochemistry division at Mount Sinai Hospital in Toronto, Canada, and division head of clinical biochemistry at the University of Toronto.
Imagination is often essential to making a transformative breakthrough. Scientists routinely imagine how molecules move and fit together, anthropomorphize proteins and cells, and try to draw useful analogies between familiar everyday phenomena and molecular events that can be detected only indirectly. These mental exercises can be strongly influenced by each scientist's personal perspective. Brainstorming to crack a previously intractable problem is obviously less effective if every person's vision is similar. Similarly experienced individuals may rapidly reach consensus, but they may miss the chance for a creative leap forward. The comfort of that quick consensus may be one driver of the implicit bias that suppresses diversity in the field. Nevertheless — in addition to the clear demands of fairness and the personal benefits of working with a varied group of colleagues — research by diverse teams is both more rewarding and more original.
Despite broad and explicit institutional commitments to inclusion and official invitations to women and members of underrepresented groups to join scientific leadership, representation is still low. The persistent barriers to parity may be founded on outdated or biased evaluation strategies and unconscious discrimination by benevolent but still unenlightened leaders. Moreover, dissenting hypotheses may not be welcome even when well supported by data — particularly if out-of-the box ideas are put forth by those who don't outwardly conform to the accepted scientist phenotype. We have hope in sustained efforts to research and address the structural obstacles to equality and, importantly, efforts to effectively educate those already in power about how to be welcoming, open-minded and inclusive.
Jean Cook is an associate professor of biochemistry and biophysics and associate dean for graduate education at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
As scientists, we should be driven by data. I think perhaps the most powerful argument for the importance of diversity is the established scientific fact that groups of diverse problem solvers actually can outperform groups of high-ability problem solvers. See Lu Hong and Scott E. Page's paper in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. That study settled the question of the tangible benefit of diversity for me. But of course, whenever policies that affect people are concerned, there is also the question of simple human decency. I find it reassuring and heartwarming that diversity is beneficial to our practical outcomes as well as to our sense of humanity.
Gregory A. Petsko is a former ASBMB president. He is the Arthur J. Mahon professor of neurology and neuroscience and the director of the Helen and Robert Appel Alzheimer's Disease Research Institute at Weill Cornell Medical College.
My experience as a member of ASBMB for most of my career and an especially strong advocate for inclusion for minorities and women for just as long of a time, is that BMB (i.e., the ASBMB) is just like all of the other sciences and societies (the Endocrine Society, the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology, the American Society for Cell Biology, etc.) in that they love to talk the talk about diversity and inclusion, but all you have to do is look at the numbers (memberships, officers, administrators, sessions/themes at conferences, etc.) to see that no one is really walking the walk. Am I cynical? Just honest, frustrated and angry that science and, actually academia in general, is discriminatory, elitist and totally not about embracing what benefits inclusion can offer. The problem? White privilege has long ruled the academy, and society for that matter. And as someone who has fought intensely against that for many years, I don't see it changing anytime soon. This is especially disappointing when, as scientists, we see the paucity of diversity everywhere but are really not committed to try and fix it. Hell, even the National Institutes of Health, which talks a lot about diversity and has actually numerous programs designed to achieve it, only has 2 percent black principal investigators! What does that say?
Thomas Landefeld is a professor of biology at California State University, Dominguez Hills, and author of "Mentoring and Diversity: Tips for Students and Professionals for Developing and Maintaining a Diverse Scientific Community."
Practical implications for improving diversity in STEM education and training
Recent national conversations about the benefits of diversity in university science classrooms are stimulated in part by a case before the Supreme Court of the United States that has reignited a firestorm of interest in how diversity is engaged, or not, in many areas of science, technology, engineering and mathematics. In the backdrop of these intense and needed discussions, there is a growing recognition in biochemistry and many other areas of STEM that an increased ability to identify and integrate evidence-based practices for recruiting, training and retaining a diverse pool of individuals and for improving mentoring for broadening participation is needed (see here, here, here and here). The specific roles and responsibilities that STEM professors and administrators, particularly those receiving federal funding, should have in securing future access and success for individuals from diverse backgrounds to participate in STEM also are being debated. Related to this, a need to document the outcomes of broader impacts and outreach, particularly those efforts supported with public funding, is a growing concern for many. There have been calls for public funding agencies, which provide substantial financial research support to a large number of institutions that continue to struggle with recruiting and retaining student body populations and faculty compositions that reflect national demographics, to serve as catalysts in driving needed changes through supporting evaluation of progress and evidence of advancement and dissemination in the areas of broader impact, in addition to more widely accepted metrics for primary research efforts, for funded endeavors and continued eligibility for funding (see here, here, here and here). These concerns represent an opportunity for the development of progressive and potentially transformative initiatives that center the work of broader impacts and attempts to promote diversity in STEM in the effective engagement of evidence-based mentoring and outreach practices. One potential avenue for promoting such change is through research partnerships or "communities of practice" that include STEM primary investigators and higher education researchers in the social sciences, education and organizational development who are studying factors contributing to STEM success. There is great potential for such efforts to play a critical role in accelerating progress in improving diversity in STEM recruitment, retention, education and training to sustain our nation's STEM educational enterprise.
Beronda L. Montgomery is a professor of biochemistry and molecular biology at Michigan State University.
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WASHINGTON (Pajhwok): The UN secretary-general on Sunday congratulated Afghans for the successful conduct of elections, noting the polls marked an important step forward in first democratic transition of power in the country.
His spokesperson quoted Ban Ki-moon as saying: "The millions of women and men who cast their ballots are a testament to the courage and the commitment of Afghans to exercise their rights and shape their future."
While welcoming the momentous achievement, he said the Afghans braved threats and intimidation to exercise their right to vote, and in doing so, they had sent a powerful message that the perpetrators of violence could not win.
Ban noted the strong participation of women as elections workers, observers, candidates and, above all, as voters – another step forward for Afghan women in taking their rightful place in society and having a say in their country's future on an equal basis with Afghan men.
The secretary-general commended security forces for their professionalism and dedication that enabled citizens to vote in the face of serious security threats. He also congratulated Afghanistan's independent electoral institutions.
He encourages all Afghans to continue supporting the electoral institutions as they discharged their critical responsibilities fairly, transparently and in the interest of the Afghan people.


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I'm changing my computer.
I currently have Microsoft Office 2010 Professional (which I got from the academic promotion 'Ultimate Steal') and Windows 7 64-bit (which I got from MSDNAA) installed.
I have the serial codes for each, and can probably obtain an ISO file for Windows.
However, how do you actually de-register Office and Windows so you can re-enter the serial number on a new machine?
Also I don't have a CD or .exe file for Office 2010, where can I download it? (I can no longer download the file from where I bought it because it is too long after I purchased it)


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This is very unlike me to post something for the world to see but I am compelled to share the secret I stumbled upon. Yes this is a review for Isabelle Fox. Now, if you are a discerning gentleman, looking for the best of the best companionship that money can buy, well read on.
She is a true companion for the heart and the soul, if you know what I mean. There is a fascinating reason she charges a bit more than the average market because her companionship is unmatched. Her profile pictures are great but she is way better and hotter in person. She is very understanding and accommodating to your needs, even sometimes without being explicit. She is matured beyond her age, which enables her to connect intellectually regardless of your interests. This is a unique skill she possesses, which makes spending time with her as genuine as it gets. Her adventurous nature entices you to go beyond your boundaries which ultimately results in an out of body experience, that people rarely get experience in their life.
To put all these into perspective, imagine your girlfriend when you just started dating and she is wild yet you feel so connected that the physical intimacy is at its peak. Well she is exactly that girlfriend but only she is that wild and connected every time. I will end my review of this addictive woman by a quote, "be kind and respectful and she will reciprocate with ten folds if not more". Are you up for the challenge!!!
Sometimes you just happen to eye a girl who leaves a lasting memory in your head… That's Isabelle.
First Contact: Belle advised that she would be free at noon for 1.5hrs and I just couldn't resist. Work went outta the window and the cab flew to her cozy apartment. I was greeted by the most beautiful Isabelle at the door… waiting for me with her candle lit condo and her see through dress.
Playtime: We spent some time talking about this n that and went into the bedroom…and then she started to undress me. While she was at it I was enjoying her bottoms through the mirror and rubbed between her thighs with my legs. We spent the next 15 to 20 mins eating each other in various positions. She is absolutely effing amazing with her mouth on the dick. Her eyes would constantly be affixed at me and me enjoying the sight of her gulping my moist rod in her mouth. She took her time to play with my balls and gave me an amazing teabagging session. I am a big fan of mouth fuck so I would constantly change positions to fill her mouth and get back to her pussy wet and oozing.
Plough: We started with a slow she on top and went rhythmic for a while and changed between missionary, doggy, sideways and crossed legs.. she was genuinely involved in making sure that I was enjoying every thrust that I had filling her tight pussy. We had two sessions with one me cumming inside her (protected) and then a royal CIM which she happily swallowed…seriously that makes me feel amazing when a lady drinks up the jizz.. and that's exactly why I will be meeting Belle again.
Post Worship: We had a slow shower together enjoying the hot water and talking about the session with her cleaning me in and out.
Farewell: It took me a good 5 mins to come to terms with leaving her. She is just adorable and knows exactly what to do to make you happy.
Tips: Book early and let her know exactly what you want. She is excellent at keeping you informed with her plan and how she wants to see you. I enjoyed almost half a day messaging her until I got to meet and that kinda helped both of us to make sure we made the best of the time. Book longer sessions for a relaxed well deserved Worship of this magnificent girl.
Belle… I will see you again!
Toni B, September 2016
How do you write an accurate review that captures the true essence of an experience that makes you feel that you are the luckiest person on earth. Contact… You are always nervous when meeting someone for the first time, with Isabelle this is quickly forgotten. You get this feeling even before you meet her by the way she communicates with you whilst organising a date. I had a few questions and specific requests for our date that Isabelle was happy to discuss over email. When you first meet Isabelle she is quickly able to put you at ease by her engaging conversation and signs of intimacy that you would generally expect from a girlfriend. The look… Although Isabelle's profile pictures look great, they are nothing compared to opening your door and seeing an absolutely stunning young lady with a beautiful smile standing in front of you. Experience… This is something that I cannot really describe in words. Yes, I can tell you what we did but that will not accurately describe the feeling of absolute ecstasy you feel. I have been lucky enough to meet up with Isabelle multiple times over the last few months…. I am eagerly awaiting our next adventure….
Her smile says it all … Isabelle is a pure delight to be with. When she showed up in the lobby of my hotel, I was able at last to see that the rest of her face is every bit as pretty as the smile you see in her profile. And her personality is to match – warm, friendly, and down to earth. I could scarcely wait to get her back to my room and undressed!
Once we were in private, Isabelle disappeared into the bathroom for a few moments, then emerged in a skimpy outfit that had her glorious breasts practically popping out to greet me. From head to foot, she's even better in real life than her photos. Pretty soon I'd undone her top and was dividing my time between her bust and the lovely lips that had first attracted me to her profile. Then she insisted on using them and her never-resting tongue to engage in some exquisite natural oral – if you can't imagine those lips wrapped around you, try it for real and you'll *feel* what I mean by "exquisite".
Needless to say, Isabelle is just as much a sex dynamo as what she looks, with a trim, taut body just made for the bedroom. She was full of energy and real enthusiasm as we moved from one position to another – especially after some DATY warmed her up with an initial shuddering orgasm. And she didn't ease off one bit until I'd reached completion in one of our more gymnastic positions.
I didn't have a chance to explore all Isabelle's GFE offerings, let alone PSE. But I'll be back to experience all those delights next time I'm in Melbourne. What an amazing girl!
Rob, October 2016
I had been admiring Isabelle Fox's escort profiles and social media profiles for sometime now, she just looked so perfect that I wanted to devour her. Her prices are on the high end, which would rule out many punters but believe me she's high end for a reason.
I went with Isabelle's 'The Devil' package, which is the type of PSE I'm after and I made a request that she wear a short red dress with matching red high heels.
I had been fantasizing about the upcoming devilish session for over a week and I just couldn't wait to meet this beautiful young brunette. On first impressions upon meeting Isabelle I was blown away because she was just as I had fantasied about. Beautiful young soft skin, gorgeous light blue eyes, delicious full lips, perfect pearl white teeth, perfect enhanced breasts, long toned legs and an amazing arse to sink my mouth and tongue into.
Isabelle looked immaculate and ever so gorgeous in her red body hugging dress with matching red high heals. When I first met her I went from flaccid to rock hard, totally rock hard in a matter of seconds. I gave her my gift and then had my hands all over her, she smelt like heaven, her perfume was heavenly. I pushed her up against the side of the lounge suite, lifted up her dress and noticed she had no panties, which was a big turn on. Isabelle has an amazing arse, just right for her athletic build and with her up against the side of the lounge suite I decided there was no better time than to tongue such an amazing behind. Rimming Isabelle was bliss, she tasted divine and I loved running my hands all over her arse and up and down her legs. Isabelle was moaning heavily, she loved it, it was such a turn on for both of us.
We then walked to the bed room and Isabelle proceeded to give me an amazing BBBJ in-front of the mirrors, it was an amazing site to see this gorgeous fit young lady devour my cock, I loved it when she looked at me with those innocent looking blue eyes, yum. Her BBBJ technique was excellent and had me on edge a few times and Isabelle had a Listerine strip in her mouth which made the BBBJ even more intense.
I then had Isabelle lay on the bed and went down on her. Isabelle has a beautiful shaved/waxed pussy and I must have spent at least 10 minutes down there as Isabelle was enjoying it. I then turned her around and tongued her arse again, I just couldn't help myself, I love rimming and she has an amazing inviting behind. I tongue fucked her arse for a while which Isabelle enjoyed and believe me if she had anal as an option I would've taken it up, no matter how much more as her arse is amazing and I'd love to blow my load in it.
After devouring Isabelle's arse for sometime I asked Isabelle if she could rim my arse as I knew it was part of her PSE package, but I imagine that would come with conditions, I mean you need to be inviting down there. Anyway without hesitation she turned me around and started to gently rim me, I then pulled apart my butt cheeks and she started to tongue my arse a lot more vigorously, it felt fantastic and it was amazing to watch her do this to me in the mirror, it's something I will always remember with excitement.
So after lots and lots of exciting foreplay on goes the condom and Isabelle hops on top and what an amazing site, my hands were all over her, her body is amazing, especially her soft skin, it was such a turn on and I almost blew my load on several occasions, but I had to hold on. We fucked in several more positions before we tried doggy and what a site it was looking down at her delicious arse. I had Isabelle up against the side of the bed so I was standing whilst fucking and it was amazing to view this in the mirror. I started talking dirty to her whilst pounding her, telling her how I loved licking her arse and how much she excites me, this really turned her on and her pussy contracted and she came. I though it was now my turn to cum, I told Isabelle to get on the ground, I took the condom off and started to rub my cock and blew a massive load in her mouth, my cock must have contracted 9 times during the orgasm, it was probably the most intensive I've had. Isabelle now though had a load of cum in her mouth, so I told her to swap it into mine and we shared the load together.
Isabelle Fox is a great young lady and I would love to see her again, she's a lot of fun and to me a perfect 10. Please keep in mind like with all ladies YMMV and it takes two to tango…
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Credito P-3026 Polorised Purple-Silver
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Eh, just another writer who's failing at writing something inspirational. I don't know what motivates me but I have to be patient. I have to tell myself that someday, my patience will pay off and my dreams will come true.
For now, let's just sit back and try our best.


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Although each individual island differs from the next, they are all linked together by the ma'ohi culture, which is a source of inspiration, of perception and different life experiences. Experiencing this culture gives visitors a real opportunity to step into a completely different world.
Welcome to these islands which are as precious and fragile as they are sparsely distributed within the vastness of the South Pacific. Welcome to the invisible continent that is the Polynesian triangle.
Ia ora na, Maeva e Manava.
The Yellow Flag Guide you see here is the web version constantly up to date of the Stopover Handbook.
The Stopover Handbook in French Polynesia booklet brings together practical information and useful addresses for your stopovers in the islands that you will visit. You can download it.


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The San Jose Giants are the current Class A affiliate of the San Francisco Giants. They both feature similar logo with a S interlocking with a J. This New Era Fitted Cap is black based and features a green underbrim. The logo itself is a highlighter orange.
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Photo Display from Old FrameNovember 14th, 2013 in member junk
My 1 Year Anniversary is this weekend! My husband and I decided that instead of buying gifts for each other, we're going to make them. I've had this old brown frame for a while because the glass cracked.
I spray-painted it a matte black, and then I strung wire across the backside of the frame, and secured it with tacks, wrapping the wire around the tacks a few times and making sure the tacks are firmly in place.
Then I just went to Michael's (had a 50% off coupon) and bought some of those tiny little clothespins- mine are silver glitter ones.
Then I just went through a drawer with a bunch of old pictures in it and clipped them along the wire.
So easy, and he loved the present. I especially like the way the photobooth strip photos looks when displayed this way. :)
posted in: member junk
Comments (2)
Lani Posted: 1:50 pm on November 14th
Take care,
Sue Posted: 7:05 am on November 14th


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Comms Agencies Ketchum And Hausmann Group Sign Agreement
Communications agency Ketchum has signed an exclusive agreement with Aussie independent PR agency The Hausmann Group.
The partnership will provide The Hausmann Group resources to further grow the business and provide its clients with global solutions and a greater diversity of offerings. The affiliation also will be a major asset for Ketchum clients that plan to expand their business to Australia or wish to strengthen their presence in the market, which is the world's 12th-largest economy.
The Hausmann Group, which was founded in 1990, is led by CEO Judi Hausmann and managing director Katrina Brangwin, who has been with the company since its inception.
"The Hausmann Group's leadership, core values and its dedication to delivering extraordinary work make it evident why they're such a perfect fit for Ketchum. I have no doubt that this partnership will be a long and fruitful one," said Jon Higgins, Ketchum senior partner and CEO, International. "As one of the world's largest economies and with a population of nearly 24 million people, Australia is a vital market for Ketchum clients and prospects, many of which have business operations in the country," Higgins added.
The Sydney-based consultancy encompasses Hausmann Communications, which specializes in public relations and experiential marketing campaigns that target consumers, and Health Haus, a specialist healthcare PR agency. Hausmann Communications is jointly managed by general managers Linda Reid and Jon Manning, while Health Haus is headed by general manager Ian Harris.
The Hausmann Group offers local-market expertise and experience in delivering creative and integrated 360-degree campaigns across PR, events, digital, experiential and social for some of the world's leading brands as well as a range and depth of knowledge across healthcare, fast-moving consumer goods, entertainment and fashion, lifestyle, technology and business.
"Our partnership with Ketchum comes at an auspicious time, as The Hausmann Group celebrates 25 successful years in business this year. We are enormously proud of all that we have achieved in this time and believe that the affiliation with Ketchum will allow us to offer our clients and staff even stronger services and opportunities in an ever-evolving market," said Judi Hausmann. "We will remain a nimble, independent operator but with the backing of Ketchum's deep capabilities, creative talent and resources and impressive global client network. Our staff will be able to benefit not only from our own rigorous training programs but also from Ketchum's industry-leading professional development program. We see this partnership as a win for everyone."


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Back Taxes: Unfiled Withholding Tax
Regulation 105: Withholding Tax for Non-Residents
In today's global economy, earning income in a country in which you are not a resident is commonplace. However, many countries have specialized tax rules in place that withhold part of this income. These rules are referred to as "withholding taxes"; one of Canada's withholding taxes is found in Regulation 105 of the Income Tax Act.
What is Regulation 105?
Regulation 105 of the Canadian Income Tax Act imposes a 15% withholding tax on fees, commissions or other amounts earned from services rendered in Canada by non-resident individuals and corporations. This Regulation does not apply to the sale of goods; just to the payment of services. The rationale behind Regulation 105 is to ensure that the non-resident service-provider pays any Canadian income tax duly owing.
Regulation 105 is set out as follows:
"Every person paying to a non-resident person a fee, commission or other amount in respect of services rendered in Canada, of any nature whatever, shall deduct or withhold 15 per cent of such payment."
The types of activities typically caught by Regulation 105 include work site supervision, consulting, lecturing, equipment servicing, and participation in an entertainment or sports event.
How does Regulation 105 work?
Regulation 105 puts the majority of the withholding and remitting obligations on the payor for the services rendered in Canada. The payor is required to withhold 15% of the payments made. If the required amount is not withheld, the company must pay (on behalf of the non-resident) the payment amount plus interest and applicable penalties. Additionally, the payor is required to remit all Regulation 105 withholdings to the Receiver General by the 15th of the month following the month in which the payment was made. Payors are required to file a special form in order to report all amounts paid to non-residents. This form is due by the last day of February of the year following the year in which payments were made
If the withholding requirements of Regulation 105 are not met, the employer is responsible for any monies not collected and it becomes a back tax issue for the employer. Tax Doctors Canada has highly qualified accountants in the area of international tax and non-resident tax services. Failure to comply with with your non-resident employee tax obligations can be very costly.Tax Doctors Canada can efficiently and cost effectively ensure that you comply with all your obligations under Regulation 105 in order to avoid any possible back tax complications
Do not hesitate any longer, call toll free at 1 855 TAX DOCS (855 829 3627) or use our convenient contact web form on this page for a free no obligation consultation regarding all your back tax filing needs. The professional accountants at Tax Doctors Canada can negotiate a settlement for you with the tax department and possibly save you interest, penalties and prosecution. There are Tax Doctors Canada locations in Mississauga, Toronto and Markham to serve you.
More Back Tax Related Information:Unpaid Taxes and Back Taxes
Request a Free Consultation Now!
Contact us using the web form below or call toll free at 1 855 TAX DOCS (855 829 3627) for a a free initial no obligation phone consultation. We have convenient locations in Mississauga, Toronto and Markham to serve you.


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> Antique Asian Wine Table
Antique Asian Furniture: Wine Table from Shanxi Province, China
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Item #
Approximate Age:
circa 1800
Shanxi Province, China
Northern Elm (Yumu)
Width: 41.5" (105.5cm)
Depth: 26.75" (68cm)
Height: 33.75" (85.5cm)
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41.5"(105.5cm) wide x 26.75"(68cm) deep x 33.75"(85.5cm) high
Please telephone us at 504-894-8540, or email us at
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Antique Chinese Wine Table
Antique Asian Table (Antique Chinese Wine Table). A Chinese antique table; often referred to as a wine table, as wine was served from it. Also referred to as a sword-leg table as the legs resemble an elaborate sword handle at the bottom of the leg.
The recessed legs are inserted into the shoulder joint whose tenons are exposed in the top frame. Two extenders are positioned between the legs on each side.
Originally, this wine table was covered with a thick lacquer, but the vicissitudes of 200 hundred years have worn away the lacquer exposing its beautiful brown patina.
The beading on the simple lobed apron and apron head spandrels extends down the legs terminating in the cloud patterned feet which rest on a small pad. The apron and foot style can be found in Song Dynasty period (960-1279) paintings.
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41.5"(105.5cm) wide x 26.75"(68cm) deep x 33.75"(85.5cm) high
circa 1800
Northern Elm (Yumu)
Shanxi Province, China
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|The Matador Mural at Beso
|Espana Blanco ( White Wine Sangria ) - Tasty and Refreshing drink. Perfect for Manila's Tropical weather.
|Jamon Chicken Manchego Croquette. I love this.
|Stuffed Peppers - I didn't like this as much as the other dishes.
|Lamb Shank - The queens liked the dish but thought that the cumin in the rice thew off the flavor a bit.
|Crispy Pork Belly - you can't go wrong with Pork Belly. I like it but I wish that it has a little bit more flavor.
|Pudding. I was a bit disappointed with the dessert. It tastes great but I wish that the texture was a little bit more pudding than chiffon.
Beso is a good restaurant. It' s been years since a new Tapas restaurant opened in Manila. I think I'll come back for more Tapas and Sangria.


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The Best of BEB in 2017: The 10 Most Popular Recipes
The 10 MOST POPULAR recipes of 2017 is here! Check out the list – did your favorite recipe make it??
As 2017 winds to a close, it's time for the annual roundup of the most popular recipes that were posted during the year. It wouldn't be an end-of-year celebration without it! I always look forward to putting this list together and uncovering which of the recipes were among the reader favorites for the year. So much fun! Enjoy the little trip down foodie memory lane; perhaps you'll even uncover a recipe you missed or forgot about it!
[View roundups from previous years here: 2016 / 2015 / 2014 / 2013 / 2012 / 2011 / 2010 / 2009 / 2008 / 2007]
10. Grandma's Banana Bread
9. Homemade Taco Seasoning Mix
8. Scalloped Potatoes
7. Traditional Southern Banana Pudding
6. Guinness, Whiskey & Irish Cream Cupcakes
5. Dirt Dessert
4. Homemade Rum Cake
3. No Bake Oreo Layer Dessert
2. Classic Beef Chili
And now, the most popular recipe posted on Brown Eyed Baker during 2017…
:: drum roll ::
1. Buffalo Chicken Dip
Stay tuned… tomorrow I'll be sharing a list of my favorite recipes from 2017 that didn't make the list above!
[UPDATE: See my Top 20 list HERE]
What was YOUR favorite recipe on Brown Eyed Baker during 2017?


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My life. The good, bad and ugly. The happy and sad. Joy and sorrow. I am me and that's all that matters.
Friday, December 17, 2010
At least I can sometimes make it here for fill ins!
So, here's this week's fill in from Wifey!
1. What is the best gift you have ever received or given?
My husband LOVED the laptop I bought him for the last underway. It was his "new baby" gift since he bought me one with my daughter, I figured why not buy him one for his son. He got to see pictures and everything that I got to send him a couple times during mail drops. It was the only way to see his son for the first 8 weeks of his life. I think that got him through those 8 weeks, and of course seeing me and his little girl helped the 4 weeks previous to that too!
2. Do you celebrate holidays differently when your loved one is deployed/gone or do you keep tradition?
I now try to keep things as normal as possible since having my kids. Whether hubby is home or not, we go to church, we open presents, we have dinner either here or at a friend's house (usually family also, just adopted!) I've found great comfort in my church family since coming here. I don't know what I would do without them. My military family is becoming more and more amazing too. It's just a blessing to have so many people that WANT to be a part of my family's life. I don't know what I would do without them!
3. If you celebrate Christmas, do you put an angel, star or something else on the top of your tree?
I FINALLY found an angel I liked at Bronners this past Easter, so this year is our first year with a true angel on top. A few years previous my mom lent me a crafty angel she received as a gift from this amazing woman in our lives. It made me think of her and made me feel like she was really the angel sitting on my tree watching down from heaven. I miss you Mrs. Kosa!
4. What are your three favorite websites?
facebook.com, navyfcu.org, and blogger.com. Those are the main websites I go to. I know, it's lame but I don't really have time for much else.
5. On your man do you prefer… boxers, briefs or boxer briefs? Or commando?
Well...because the only thing I've ever seen my husband in is boxers, I would say boxers. I think I would like boxer briefs better though since I think boxers and briefs both look weird and yuck, but combined they cover enough for my liking.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Friday Fill In!
On to the fill in!!! Don't know that anyone will be really interested but that's okay :)
1. What do you see your life like in 10 years?
In 10 years, my 4th child should be around 6 years old. Wookie will be out of the Navy and working somewhere here in Washington. My parents will be out here (I hope). We'll have a dog and hopefully still our cat. I'll be able to read and blog a lot more. I might be able to have a part time job too if I want and find something I like. I'll have smaller boobs and hopefully have a better body by then too!
2. What do you like most about your job?
I love that I'm the one raising my kids, not some daycare or nanny or something. I love seeing the changes every day and seeing the love in their eyes and smiles. It's so wonderful. Nothing will ever top this!
3. What are three things you do every day, no matter what day it is?
Use the bathroom, Hug my kids, Think about Wookie (if he's home, I kiss him, if he's out to sea, I "talk" to him before bed in my head)
4. What would you do with an extra five hours in the day today?
Sleep, be online, read, take a couple hot showers...I don't know really.
5. What is your favorite Christmas (or whichever holiday you celebrate) cookie recipe (please share!)?
My favorite is an Anise Seed cookie. It's amazing! It's a secret family recipe though so I can't post it. They are the only Christmas cookie I've ever had though! The reason it's a secret family recipe is because my Mimi was given the wrong recipe and it was supposed to take horrible (my Pipi's sisters didn't like her so they changed things in their mom's recipe). Turns out, the recipe was BETTER than the original! I'm making them for the first time this year by myself!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
This is in case I don't have time tomorrow
1. Were you named after anyone?
Technically no, but I do know that my dad's old girlfriend was named Stephanie and they called her Stevie, and also I have a great aunt named Eileen and my mom and dad had a friend Eileen.
2. What color, if any, are your toenails usually painted?
I usually don't have painted nails
3. How do you flush a public toilet? Hands? Feet? Something else?
Hands or feet...depends on my mood and what I have with me
4. When you were a little kid, which TV character did you have a crush on?
Randy Taylor *swoon*
5. Let's say you had to lose one of your five senses (sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell). Which one would you choose? Why?
Smell or Taste because I don't think I could deal with not seeing, hearing, or feeling things, especially the wonderfulness that is my kids!
Friday, October 29, 2010
Videos of my adorable kids!
The first video is going to be of Caralyn. She will be 2 next month and she now does backflips off the couch :) She's adorable!
The second video I want you to check out is of Alaric. He makes the same face that Caralyn did when I sang to her. Now, Ric loves me singing but when I do some things in a certain tone he HATES it and does the face! I just think it's too cute!
This will be my last post for now I guess :) My hubby just got home from work and it's time to start working on my house and stuff. Laundry will be finished this weekend, Cara's room will be started and I will be cleaning like a madwoman! I hate how dirty my house has gotten since having Alaric. It's so not cool!
I hope you enjoy the videos! There are more on my YouTube :) Just search for shortcake5284 if you want to see more!
MilSpouse Friday Fill-In
PoeKitten at Many Waters has introduced me to MilSpouse Friday Fill-Ins! I think this is really great. You can find out more about this from Wifey at Wife of a Sailor. I hope you enjoy!
This week's questions are:
1. What's the nicest thing a stranger has ever done for you?
The nicest thing a stranger has done for me is thank me for supporting my husband. I thought it was just part of the job as a wife for me to support him in all he does. I don't honestly think I've done anything special. Yes, I spend half the year as a single mother that is married, but isn't that what I signed up for when I said "I Do"? It brought tears to my eyes when he explained that it takes a special kind of woman to stay faithful during those times and a strong woman to actually be married to a military man, that he's seen so many men lose their wives because they couldn't handle the lifestyle. I wish that man could see me now with two beautiful children that I'm teaching to support Papa no matter how hard it is and no matter how long he's gone.
2. If you are having a hard time going to sleep, what do you do to help yourself?
I usually get online or start reading or doing crosswords or something. Reading always makes me tired. My eyes can't handle the stress of small print so it's my main go-to.
3. Name something that makes you wish you were a kid again.
All the toys and outfits that I buy for my kiddos. They make me miss the old days of no responsibilities and super cute clothes and fun toys.
4. What is something you never believed until you experienced it?
I never thought it was possible for older people to be so immature and naive and full of drama. I always thought that ended after high school. Boy was I wrong!
5. What can't you say "no" to?
Buying my kids cute clothes and toys...especially when they are so cute about asking for something!
I won an award!
That's right! My friend Poekitten has awarded me with my first award for my blog. I never thought my own personal blog would ever do anything like this, but I guess I was wrong! Thank you Poekitten! I appreciate it! Check out her blog! She has some really awesome stuff in it! Her crafts, cooking stuff, milspouse fill-ins, and so much more! She's a great gal and I learn so much from her daily!
On to the rules for accepting this award...
1. Accept the award. Post it on your blog with the name of the person who has granted the award and his or her blog link.
2. Pay it forward to 5 other bloggers that you have newly discovered.
3. Contact those blog owners and let them know they've been chosen.
The 5 people I'm passing it on to...
1. My cousin Angie at I Organize You
2. Heather at Our Road To A Family Of Six
3. Kira at Stephanie's Journey
4. Nicole at Thoughts of a Mother
5. Joycers at Smudgeville
Angie and Heather have two blogs that I know of, both are wonderful, but these are the ones I read regularly. Angie's second is a new one and is just starting. Heather's second is a contest/giveaway/product evaluation type blog. It's a fun one for sure! Kira also has a second blog, which is a personal blog. The one that I have awarded is her mom's journey through chemo. It's touching and very heartfelt to see how they have gone through it all. Nicole is very thoughtful and is an amazing woman. I am proud to call her a friend, even if we had a rough start and don't really communicate much in the real world even to this day. Joycers blog is full of her wonderful creations. I love them so much! My son looked so cute in his vest she made for him and my daughter still wears her hat around the house all year long. She doesn't keep it on much but we have to know where it is in case she wants to put it on for a few moments. I think everyone should check them all out!
And thank you again, Poekitten!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
*Said in a Jeff Foxworthy voice*
Today I was driving to Target and looked in my rear view mirror like you're supposed to every 8 seconds and there it was...Josh's blue Kia Rio...military stickers and all...only it wasn't Josh's car...obviously...I started crying.
I didn't cry because I was sad, but because soon it very possibly COULD be him! I'm so excited about the fact that he'll be coming home soon. I can't wait to be pierside and see him come off the boat to meet his son for the first time. Hell, even writing that I'm tearing up. I'm so excited for it! I can't believe it's almost here...almost time!
I'm still sad that Josh will have missed 8 weeks of his son's life...correction, the FIRST 8 weeks of his life, but I knew before I married him it could happen. It's not so much that I needed the help or anything, but so much has happened to him in 8 weeks...so much has changed. I wish he could've at least seen and hugged him within the first 2 weeks. Had they not been extended in the beginning (they went out 2-3 weeks early) he would've been here for the birth of his son. He would've left like the day after, but he would've been here in the very least.
Speaking of his son, he's ready to eat again. Then hopefully he'll go to bed for the night. He's been staying up really late the past couple nights. Could be the cold, could be the fact that the Similac he's had has been recalled because of possible insect parts and larvae in it. Ugh...that's a whole other blog and rant though!
Good night y'all!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Come Home Soon
This underway has gone by fairly fast since Alaric's birth. It has only slowed down the last few days. I have been keeping myself busy as much as humanly possible. I go for walks at the mall at least every other day, I take drives and have started exploring the town I moved to a year ago, I go to Friday morning coffee with the BAMA ladies, Wednesday morning Play Group have started back up, Church on Sundays or Mondays depending on how late Cara has slept in until...the list goes on. Caralyn and Alaric keep me plenty busy too!
Caralyn is doing so well with Alaric. I'm so proud of her! She is very helpful, a mini mommy. She carries around her baby doll a lot now too. If mommy has brother, she has baby. She also LOVES holding Alaric! She does really well for not even being 2! She helps pick out his clothes too. We've started working on ABC's, 123's and colors. She's doing pretty good but she isn't saying anything by herself yet. She doesn't really want to so I'm not rushing her. She'll do it in her own time. She loves reading though! She has me reading to her almost all day every day...anytime I'm sitting she's bringing me books. I LOVE it! I catch her sitting on her little couch reading to herself a lot now too. It's so cute!
Alaric...well, he's growing so much so fast. I can't believe he's already 6 weeks old. He's holding his head up most of the time already and has been since he was just hours old. I can't wait for daddy to meet him! I'm so anxious and excited for it to happen! I can't wait to see Josh's reaction to the realization that he actually has a son now. It's going to be priceless. Josh will be happy that he's in his own bed fort he most part already too. The only time he's in bed with me is when he's up for too many hours and I'm exhausted and need sleep. He falls asleep easier in bed with me and Cara usually.
As for me...I'm great. I'm still going strong on the homefront for Josh and the kids. I'm loving being a mom to two kids. I'm ready to do it again and have a third. I can't wait until I can start bugging Josh to have another baby. I know I have to wait until at least August though. Josh wants to wait 2-3 years though. We'll see where the compromise leads us...and what God's plans really are.
I have to end this here for now. My netbook is about to die on me since I've been on it much of the night. I also have to get ready to leave anyway since I'm meeting someone to drop off a step stool for their toddler (I have 3...I don't need 3...) I'll hopefully be writing a little more often now that Alaric is napping well in his crib and Caralyn lets me get on the computer a little more often now for the most part.
Later all!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Happy Birthday!
28 years ago my wonderful mother in law brought into this world the love of my life. I will be forever grateful for her going through that pregnancy and raising him by herself for the first couple of years of his life.
I am grateful for his adopted dad for being there for him and helping to raise him even though he wasn't biologically his.
I am grateful for his biological dad being there for us the last few years.
I am grateful for his step dad for helping us when we need it, even when he can't really afford to help us. I'm sure knowing we will pay him back as fast as humanly possible helps with that effort.
I am grateful for his step mom for being so wonderful to us and being impartial and supportive of everything and also for making me feel comfortable in her home when I felt shunned by almost the whole family.
I am grateful for his Grandma and Papa for taking him in during high school and helping to raise such a wonderful man.
I am grateful for his Grandpa Dorcey for always being there for us, even me, whenever we need him, even if it's just to talk or complain.
I am grateful for his Grandma J, Grandpa Tucker, Grandma Lenore and Grandma Tucker. I don't know them well, but they have certainly welcomed me into the family with no hesitation or questions asked.
Joshua Michael Luplow, you have given me two wonderful kids (so far) of my own, loved me for who I am even with my faults and quirks, stood up for me in rough times, stood by me through hard decisions and hard times, I will never be able to express how much I truly love you and appreciate you and what you do for me.
I hope you have a wonderful birthday under the water. I can not wait for your safe return so we can celebrate this wonderful day together. I love you and miss you very much! Caralyn misses you more than anything in this world. And I'm sure Alaric can't wait to meet his daddy!
Love you and miss you,
Yours always and forevermore,
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Not to complain or anything...
I want to take a long relaxing shower and actually have time to shave! I want to be able to clean my room without Caralyn following behind me and destroying it again as soon as I finish. Same thing for the dining and living rooms. I want to cook without hearing Caralyn scream bloody murder for not being able to be in the kitchen with me. I want to be online for more than just a few moments at a time to email Josh a good long email letting him know how everything really is around here and how much I miss and love him. I want to lay on the couch and maybe take a nap and relieve some of this pain I'm in from Alaric being in a weird position. I would like to go to the hospital to be checked out to make sure the pain is normal and maybe get on some new meds so I can be out of pain for the majority of the day since Tylenol isn't doing anything for me.
These things won't happen anytime soon and I know it, but it would be nice. Josh did so much for me while he was home the last few months that I feel so overwhelmed with exhaustion. Just taking a shower alone would be nice. I can deal with the rest really (other than the hospital stuff since I can't deal with Cara while being monitored). The only bad part of Josh being so helpful is that he worried so much about how I would do alone that he put me into pre-term labor for a couple weeks before he left. I have only had a little labor since he left which is nice...but now I don't know if because of the pre-term labor I'm not feeling the contractions as hard as I should. I have to wait for my water to break again.
Anyway, just a little complaint blog even though I hate complaining when Josh is gone. It's not that I can't handle him being away, it's just the end of pregnancy hormones getting to me really. I'm always frustrated at the end...it's just how I am I guess. Worse this time because of how he is positioned and because I have a toddler already to drive me nuts. LoL!
Have a wonderful day everyone!
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Horton-Schroeder Wedding
I can not believe that a year ago I was talking about the wedding and looking forward to spending their wedding evening with my wonderful husband and daughter. Things surely change in a year. Tonight I will be spending time with my daughter and enjoying their wedding immensely but I will have to send pictures to my husband so he can live it through me. This is day 5 of an up to 15 week underway. He had to leave 3 weeks early. I'm not complaining but it definitely sucks. Josh and I haven't been to a wedding together since our own almost 5 years ago. He loves this part of my family like crazy too so he's rather sad. I think he's mainly sad that he doesn't get to pick on my cousin Meghan relentlessly. He misses being able to be himself around someone other than me. Meghan is the perfect target and she fires them back which he loves even more! They can play off each other for hours, and of course big brother Tim loves it too.
I don't know what I'm more excited for...seeing Jess get married to Chris or seeing the whole family at once. I haven't been up to Sequim since Thanksgiving so I haven't seen Jess, Chris, Jenn, Aunt Lynn, Uncle Guy, Uncle Chuck, Aunt Boots, Aunt Laura and Uncle Bill in a LONG time. It's been even longer for Aunt Margie, Tim and Meghan...and I'm FINALLY meeting Uncle Terry for the first time (they live in Colorado). And yet longer for Aunt Sue, Uncle Len, Andrew and Adam, though I've seen Andrew once more than the rest of them since he came out when Cara was younger (they live in Illinois). I don't know if there are more people for me to meet or not. I think my cousins Doug and Heather may be coming out with their parents, if they are, I haven't seen them since the summer after 3rd grade. CRAZY!
After today, my little boy can come anytime he wants and I'll be happy. I just do NOT want to miss this wedding and family time. Cara and I have mostly matching dresses to wear. Hers is a block print while mine isn't. Hers has a Navy Blue in it and mine doesn't, but we will look good together for sure. Right now she's sleeping so peaceful that I have to continuously look behind me to see her precious face. I can not wait to meet her brother and have two babies to do this to. Only a month and 2 days until I'm due...how that adds up to 4 weeks and 6 days technically I do not know, but that's what it is. I turned 35 weeks yesterday.
I was having pre-term labor every day for at least 6 hours for a month before Josh left, but now that he's gone and the stress level is lower, I haven't been in labor at all. 4 days of no labor...it's amazing! I haven't rested this well in a long time. I hope the stress of getting to Tacoma and everything doesn't put me over the edge for labor today. I refuse to go to the hospital unless my water breaks right now though. I won't even time my contractions unless it gets too horribly bad. Luckily I will have family around if something does happen today! Cara will be in wonderful hands.
Anyway, need to go email Josh and get directions to the wedding location...a rooftop in Tacoma at 5PM...it's going to be amazing! This family does nothing half assed! That's for sure!
Friday, June 11, 2010
My cousin's wife hits it on the nose again...
This was my cousin Eric's wife Stacy's status update on facebook today. I love how she hits what I'm feeling on the head so many times. This is a big reason why I love her. Not only did she marry one of my favorite cousins, she is so much like me in the way we feel about many subjects.
Two family members have me feeling this way, four if you count their spouses also. Not everything has been directed at me and my little family, but my in-laws are my family also, and a lot has been directed at them. It hurts me how little these people care about their family members. Family is the most important thing in life...if you can't count on them and get over petty things with them, you have nothing.
Call your family, whether you're in good with them or are having problems with them, and tell them you love them no matter what happens. Start getting over stupid and petty things and move on with life.
I hate that my son will not know 5 people in his family...4 aunts/uncles and 1 cousin (so far). It's sad. I hate that my daughter has met 3 of the aunts/uncles but will never truly know them. I hate that I will never be able to meet one of the uncles and my nephew. I hate that Josh will never meet his brother in law, nephew and sister in law...and also will probably never be "allowed" to talk to his brother again. It's sad especially for him because he has had nothing to do with any of the bullshit that happened (and that I apologized for yet am still being treated like shit for). He's being punished for being married to me. That is shallow in my eyes. I can't even mention his brother's name without tears almost welling up in his eyes. He misses his brother so much but knows there's nothing more he can do. He's tried so very hard to be in contact with him and his brother just doesn't want anything to do with him because I'm his wife. It's sad...very very sad.
Anyway...That's really all I have time for. I need to go lay down with my beautiful daughter and hope to God these contractions stop soon. I'm sick of Braxton-Hicks Contractions...but alas I have 9 more weeks of them to go through.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
I have no clue what the extent of damage is. I have no clue who those 5 fatalities are...any friends? Family? I hope not.
I don't even know how many places were really hit during the storms yesterday...I have to call my parents soon. I have to call my in-laws to make sure they're okay. I know cell reception is down to almost nothing in a lot of areas of Monroe County. I've heard the hardest hit area was Dundee, but that doesn't mean some other places were hit.
I wonder how my Aunt in Milan is doing...she has MS so she wouldn't really be able to get to her basement. I'll have to call her too. So many people I need to call to make sure they're okay. My ex boyfriend's parents still live in Dundee near the worst damage...need to get ahold of him to make sure they're okay.
I hate tornadoes. I know it's a part of life and earth and stuff...but still...they suck. I almost died in one when I was little. I know some people wish I had, but I know plenty of others that are thankful I am still alive, including my family. I am terrified of tornadoes for that reason though...and now bad ones have destroyed a lot of lives of people I used to live near...it sucks.
If you haven't lately, call your family and friends and tell them you love them. If you're on the outs, let this natural disaster that could've harmed them be your way back on the in...you never know, you could regret not being there if something happened.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Good times
Josh's first mother's day was a good one. He actually spoiled the crap out of me. I didn't have to change a single diaper yesterday...which is awesome. I haven't had that since before Caralyn was born! He and Cara both got me Mother's Day cards too! They were so cute! I loved them! Cara's had Elmo on it and actually talked. She just makes my day...most days anyway.
I also got one of the most kick ass Mother's Day presents anyone could ask for! I got my very own paintball gun! Josh got one too...and we have everything else we need for them. We went and bought paint balls yesterday too so I can practice shooting whenever I want. YAY!
The week before was my birthday also. I can't believe I'm 26 years old now. Only 2 years ago did I have my first child and now I'm having my second. I have 4 years to have at least one more child...and I would love to have 2 or 3 more. I would love to be done (or at least have a child) during my 30th year.
OMG for my birthday...Josh took me to see Alice In Wonderland, sans Caralyn. We went to church, got breakfast/lunch, chilled at home, took Caralyn to Joyce's house, went to the movie, then got Caralyn and came home. We were going to go to dinner too, but I just wasn't hungry after the movie. I stuffed myself with popcorn...mmm....popcorn. Anwyay....Caralyn picked out a wireless mouse for me. I guess it was so cute because when Josh told her they were getting mommy a birthday present, she ran to the mouse and wouldn't leave until Josh took it. I needed a new one, and I'd been looking at them a lot...so I guess she just knew. Josh on the other hand....he bought me a netbook. He's also going to get my car detailed so I don't have to do it myself.
Now...I know I don't have many readers, and I don't keep this thing for people to read, it's all for me...but I have a feeling for some reason that if I want to talk about anything dealing with family issues and real feelings I need to get out, I'm going to have to make a new one or just write on paper (which I would rather not do). All I ask is that if you do read me, please just leave a comment of any kind. Don't care if it's relevant to my post or not. I know a certain member of my family reads but doesn't comment because they want to use my blog as ammo for why my family is so horrible and why they shouldn't be family with me and my family...then they use it against my husband, who has nothing to do with this journal or the problems they have with my family...it just irritates the hell out of me that someone can be so petty and that I have to keep everything out of my own personal journal just in case they read it (which...since they used my last blog against my husband just hours after I posted it...I know they are probably stalking it).
Anyway, that's it for now. Just remember, please leave some sort of comment if you're reading me. And if you're my stalker, be an adult and stop using crap against an innocent for your own personal benefit. You don't even know my husband, so what's your beef with him? You can tell me your beef with me all you want also, it's what an adult would do.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Michigan Trip so far
I was still very uncomfortable around Josh's Grandma and it felt like she was trying the least she could to be civil to me, but it's better than it has been in the past. I had a couple "hi"s and "bye"s from her and not much inbetween. I think the most was her offering me sauerkraut when I asked Josh for a couple bites of his at dinner Friday night. We got "I love you"s from her too, but I know they were mainly at Josh and that's okay. At least she was civil and didn't completely ignore the fact that I was there.
The only thing that irked the daylights out of me is what she said to Josh after church. She told him to keep in touch with his siblings, as if he hasn't been trying since he got back from underway! He just told her that he could only keep in touch as much as they let him. I'm glad he stood up for himself that way, even if it was just a little something. He has been trying and it's not our fault that Caleb and Holly won't return phone calls, Instant Messages or emails. I mean, before my "enough is enough" blog, I thought Caleb, Holly and I were fine…I don't know what the heck I did to ruin that, but nothing is ever their fault so I'm sure I did something without knowing it. Maybe it's because I still talk to "THAT" side of the family…or because I didn't take their side of things…who knows. I did nothing wrong, so I will not apologize again…it is their turn. And as for how they're treating Josh…there is no reason for it. Josh has had nothing to do with the whole situation…the only connection? He's my husband. It just makes me so mad that they're this immature. My child seems to grasp maturity and the difference between right and wrong better than them and she's not even 17 months old yet.
On the good side of things…Friday we got to Frankenmuth and saw Josh's Grandpa Dorcey. We always love seeing him. He's a hoot and a half! After that stop we went to see Jeff and Jeanine and to put our things up. Seth was there and we met his girlfriend Brooke. She was really nice from what I could tell. Around 6PM Grandma and Papa Luplow were there and we decided on food. We went to the Bavarian Inn and it was WONERFUL! I was craving roast beef (ewww!) so I got that. It was pretty good. I was surprised.
Saturday we went around downtown Frankenmuth. We went to the Bavarian Inn and Lodge and let Cara play in the play area for awhile. She seemed to enjoy that immensely. We ate at the Ratskeller for lunch. I had a WONERFUL burger and fries. I couldn't believe how good it tasted. I haven't had a good burger like that in a long time. We walked downtown and I got to buy my fudge, which I was sooooo happy about! I even got to get my mom some Sugar Free fudge, which doesn't taste like fudge, but it's good anyway! She got SF Chocolate and I got Mint Chip, German Chocolate, Chocolate Peanut Butter and Rocky Road. The 4 non SF varieties were to share between me, Josh, my dad and Kacee…also my Aunt Patty if she really wanted some. Cara's been enjoying a little bit of it too.
Sunday we got up for 8AM service at St. Paul's (I believe) in Saginaw for Grandma's birthday. It was a very enjoyable service. When Cara needed changed Josh took her so I could pay attention to service (he's a wonderful husband like that…he's amazing and way too good to me!). He kept her downstairs after that to play because I guess she turned into an imp after getting changed. She was a tired little imp after service and was being buttheadish but still so cute! After service we went back to Jeff and Jeanine's and changed, ate breakfast and hung around until about 12:30PM. We then headed to Bronner's since we couldn't get ahold of Grandpa Dorcey. I picked out my new Christmas Tree topper and bought it then left. We got to look around the place a little too. I forgot how huge that place was! We picked up McDonald's then headed back to my mom and dad's house.
While we were eating breakfast and a little while afterwards we talked about the sermon and the Caleb stuff. Josh had talked to Jeff about my previous blog before I had gotten down to the kitchen (I packed up while Cara slept on the couch downstairs). I don't know the conversation, but I hope Jeff understands things a little better. Only God knows for sure. After breakfast while we were sitting around the table Josh told Jeff about Anna getting in contact with him and meeting Brad, Shell, Anna, Samantha and the rest of that part of our family. It's a huge relief to me that Josh finally told him. I've been urging him to do it for awhile, but I understand why Josh was nervous to do so. Jeff took it well and seemed happy that we found another extension of our family. Our family is huge and I love it so much. I feel so blessed to have the family I have, that I have married into and that I am making with Josh. It's one of God's amazing gifts that just fill me with awe and wonder.
On the Monroe side of things, life's been great here. We've been staying with my parents. We get to see Penny, Mark and Alea as much as possible. We've seen some wonderful friends. I do hate that some people haven't gotten in touch with us, but I understand that life happens and I can't see everyone. I would need a year here to do that…and I'm not willing to live here for another year. LoL!
We have taken Cara to Munson Park a couple times. The first time Seth and Alea came out with Chulo and Chloe. The second we saw an old friend and his daughter, which was really nice. I wish I were able to be closer to him like I used to be, but it's impossible. We have gone to dinner at Mongolian BBQ (my favorite!) and Cracker Barrel. We had Easter lunch at a Mexican place with Penny, Mark and Seth which was great. We've gone to the mall to walk around a couple times. I've gotten to go out with my mom to shop for new clothes for Cara and Alaric along with going to lunch at Olga's with her just like old times. We went to Livonia and ate at Steak 'N Shake with Bryan, then Josh went back to Detroit later that evening to see him again hosting Karaoke. My Aunt JoAnne came to my parents house to visit…I got to go to my friend Sarah's ultrasound with her and her mom…it's just been a great visit.
We only have a couple more plans. We are having dinner with our dear friends tonight. Bryan and his girlfriend are supposed to come down on Friday sometime to see us and then Josh and I will be going to karaoke for a little while with Cassie and Jeff. I'm so excited and can't wait!
The only things I do have to do before we leave are go to see my Pipi and try to get ahold of my Aunt Pat and Uncle Keith so we can go say hi to them. I have to eat at least one Vince's Chili Dog and eat some Fried Cauliflower from Blue Streak…after that, I'll be satisfied, though I would LOVE to eat at Mongolian BBQ again before we leave…there is nowhere in Washington that compares to that place. Not even close!
I shall wrap up for now. I may write again about the rest of the trip after I get home. I don't know. It's taken me two tries to actually finish this…and the second I've been tired and it looks like it isn't as well put together as the first time…I could be wrong, but I just am not happy with it, but oh well! 'Tis life!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
This pregnancy has been a blessing in pretty much every way possible. With Cara I was on bed rest and pelvic rest and so tired all the time and just had a hard time. I didn't honestly know how I was going to get through this pregnancy with a toddler on my hands. I have been surprised that I have energy, I can move around and do anything I want, I'm fairly comfortable and I haven't been put on any kind of "rest". It's wonderful and has made me want to do it again someday...just not this fast again! LoL!
I do still get tired, especially if I force myself to sleep more than 4 hours at a time (which is always) but it's not like I get to have set naps every day with Caralyn. She goes to sleep when she wants to. Lately she will actually take naps...one starting between 10 and 12 and another starting between 3 and 5. I hate when she takes late naps, but it happens.
On another note, I have my last OB appt before going to MI today. I'll be 21 weeks tomorrow and we leave Friday night and arrive Saturday early morning. We are in MI until April 17. I'm excited about most of the trip...the part where we'll be in Monroe/LaSalle. I'm anxious and worried about going to Saginaw for a weekend. There's still some bad blood between Josh's dad and myself and Josh's Grandma and myself. This will be the first time Josh is face to face with ANY of his family since the Caleb stuff started happening. I'm honestly worried.
We have decided that if I am treated poorly or just completely ignored or "cold shouldered" that Josh will say something. If he doesn't, I don't know that I'll hold in the inner bitch in me...pregnancy hormones makes it hard for me to hold my tongue when I know I'm being treated poorly. I act before I think and it's bad. I'm not usually like that...I usually can hold it in long enough to get away from everyone and everything and just rant to Josh or online about it...not during pregnancy though...sometimes I make it, but with how long this has been going on (over a year) I don't think it'll happen...
On top of that, we have decided if I am treated that way, we will not be a part of that life. They will have to deal with the loss of their grandchildren/great grandchildren on their own. It is not right for me to be treated that way, especially in front of my children. When Cara was younger and not as much of a sponge it didn't bother me as much, but she is learning like crazy and mocks people. I will not allow her to be taught by them that it's okay to treat mommy, or anyone else for that matter, that way. I will not stand for it. They need to grow up and act like adults instead of middle school children. They need to realize that my family comes first and so do my values and morals. Josh agreed to this, which honestly doesn't surprise me...it was me that forced him back into their lives so it's okay that I'm backing out. Makes sense right?
I hate the thought of losing more family. It royally sucks, but what else can I do? Family is so important to me...his grandma has never liked me because I didn't force Josh away from Penny, no matter how much I hated her myself at that point. Josh's dad didn't like me at first because I wasn't intimidated by him. He warmed up to me as time went on, and I believe with all my heart and soul, pushes from his wife. Papa...well I've always loved him and he's always been the laid back neutral party in everything. He's always been super nice and supportive of me and Josh.
I'm just lucky I will never lose my side of the family, Penny, Mark, Alea and Seth. And if Seth decides to treat his mother like Caleb, he has already been warned of the wrath and beating he will receive from me. This has torn him up completely so I don't honestly think he will ever do something like this to his mom. 2/4 kids forever is better than 1 or none though, right? It's wrong that ANY of her kids have treated her poorly but I know it's a part of life. It sucks.
So I went on a bit of a rant, and I probably will again and again with this subject because it just bugs the crap out of me, but for now I shall end.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Enough Is Enough
I recently decided to let my brother in law and his wife go. He has treated me like crap since he met her approximately 2 years ago. She started treating me like crap the second she met me in person. They both treated me worse when I stuck up for my family and for what was really right.
That isn't what gets me to the point of giving up and letting go though. I can be treated like crap for a very long time without giving up. When they start treating my daughter like crap is where I draw the line. Cara's first 15 months of life has been mostly without these two. I went back to MI so she could meet him and start having him in her life. It ended at that trip. He saw her again on his wedding day and didn't even want to see her, he didn't want to see me either, and that was where it started tearing me up trying to hold onto this relationship because they were family.
Just a couple days ago my hormones got the best of me when he posted about how much he loves his niece, who is his wife's adopted niece, and realized he had deleted every picture of his blood niece that he had of her online. He cut his own blood out of his life when she did nothing to deserve it except have me as her mother. I thought all of our problems had been pretty much solved when I apologized, listened to her side of the story then let her know my feelings and my side of the story. I was wrong.
So last night I cut them out of my life. I can not take it any longer. I can not put my daughter and this new baby through this. It's just not good for them.
Speaking of my daughter, she just woke up from her nap. Later!
Monday, February 22, 2010
So overwhelmed
Josh came home a few days after my mom left. The days inbetween were killer, but I got through them. It was nice to have a few days alone with Caralyn, but it was so hard at the same time. I have energy back but I get so exhausted so easily still.
We went to the zoo on Thursday this past week. I loved it. The zoo wasn't that great, but it worked to get Cara and myself into the fresh air and walking around. The next day we went to the aquarium. It sucked, but was enjoyable at the same time for me. Saturday Josh was sick with food poisoning. I took Caralyn out to go grocery shopping and stuff. When I got toward the end, I started getting a really hard pressure in my stomach...like a boulder sitting down there. A little while later I started getting super sharp pains, like swords stabbing into my stomach and side. I took a shower to calm it down, but I started getting nauseaus so I went to the hospital in case I was going into pre-term labor again (it felt like that when I did at 29 weeks with Cara). The Dr barely gave me a second glance or listen (the corpsman and nurses were more concerned about me than the Dr. That's bad!) before telling me it was just Braxton Hicks contractions and Ligament Pain and it would just go away on its own. He didn't even hook me up to a machine to see if I was having contractions and to see if it was better or worse as time went on! I dealt with the same pressure all day yesterday (Sunday) and today it's finally easing up a little. I want to hurt that Dr. I shouldn't have had that problem for over 24 hours. The Dr. said he didn't want to see me back unless I started bleeding on top of the pain and pressure. So he wanted me to be losing my baby pretty much. Gah! He was an asshole.
So today I'm sitting at home. Cara's playing with some of her toys right now. She's not happy that I'm online, but she's living. She knows it won't last forever and that when I get off, I'll be cuddling with her and spending my time with her. Anyway...I have a few other things to do really fast before I get off here and be with her. Later y'all! I'll try to write a little more often.