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Hi! Today I'll let you know about a Hackerspace that I have founded together with my friends João Duarte, Goncalo Pereira, Fábio Martins and Hugo Santos in September of 2011 inside the University of the Algarve. The electronics engineering department had been providing a room for students to do their projects for a few years but it had never got much use.
It all started with the Electronics Club some years ago which was founded by my friend Zé Luis (currently doing some cool stuff at his company, Metalideia) and some of his friends. After some years it changed name twice and became NEEST, then NOISE, but unfortunately only the names were changing and not much was being done, except keeping it "alive", which was also important. Otherwise the room would have been lost. We had been talking about how the space wasn't being properly used for a while and then we finally decided to go ahead and turn it into a real Hackerspace, eLab. As far as we know it's the first Hackerspace hosted inside a university in Portugal, having great benefits like free space, free internet and free electricity. Also, sometimes we get to borrow some tools from the electronics engineering department which is always handy.
We began by meeting once every week to clean everything, scavenge components from all the electronic devices that had been gathered throughout the years, put some shelves on the walls, organize all the components and tools and take out the trash.
|(Click the photo for better resolution in Picasa Photostream)
Then we had to make the Hackerspace rules, so that everyone can use the space in harmony.
Basically now we have an approximately 4mx4m room with 6 individual workbenches and a larger workbench for the mechanical hard work (drilling, cutting, hammering, smashing :P). We also have a computer and basic tools such as pliers, side cutters, screwdrivers, saws, glue guns, craft knifes, soldering irons, etc. We still do not have many tools but have been adding more tools as we get funds to buy them.
|(Click the photo for better resolution in Picasa Photostream)
After that, we finally had everything ready to begin developing other projects and activities to persuade other students and people from outside the university to join the Hackerspace to come learn with us, teach us stuff we don't know and have fun building some really cool projects.
Since then we have been developing several projects, such as the eLab led illuminated logo, GSM entry control system, a plasma speaker, a Tesla coil, mobile robots, an electric vehicle, an automatic PCB agitator, a PIC development board, etc. and organizing several workshops: Transforming a ATX Power Supply into a Lab Power Supply, PCB manufacturing and, in a couple of days, Arduino Instrumentation for Beginners.
We hope to keep growing in the number of members, workshops, workshop attendees, tools, projects and make it a reference Hackerspaces in Portugal.
|(Click the photo for better resolution in Picasa Photostream)
Sure, we are still at the very beginnings and we still don't have CNC machines, laser cutters and 3D printers but we'll reach that in time ;) Probably we won't be able to buy them... so we'll have to buy them ourselves.
Here are some more pics of the hard work that has been done to get everything ready to work :) :
Get the flash player here: http://www.adobe.com/flashplayer
Hope to have inspired you to get together with your friends and create a Hackerspace in your city, university, school, etc. :)
If you wish and know how to read portuguese (or use Google Translator) visit eLab's blog at: http://ualgelab.wordpress.com/
Take care!
Did you find this post helpful? Do you wish to contribute to other projects regarding computer science, electronics, robotics or mechatronics that will be posted in this blog? If you wish to do so, you can donate via paypal using the button below. Thanks! :)


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In the early modern period, Italian Jewry comprised of three major groups: the Italianate, the Ashkenazic, and the Sephardic Jews. These Jews lived in several major cities, including Rome, Venice, Padua, Mantua, Florence, and somewhat later in Livorno (Leghorn). The Italianate community dated its origins as far back as during the Roman Empire. In the late fourteenth and in the fifteenth centuries, many Jews, along with Christian artisans and merchants, migrated to the Italian peninsula from German lands, encouraged by Italian dukes and Renaissance popes, and motivated by hopes for more prosperous lives. After the Expulsion of the Jews from Spain in 1492, many Sephardic Jews began to move to Italian cities, whether from the Ottoman Empire or directly from the Iberian Peninsula (see above). In the seventeenth century, another wave of Ashkenazic migrants arrived from eastern Europe following the Chmielnicki massacres of 1648-9.
Jewish life in early modern Italy can be roughly divided into two periods. In the first period, the Renaissance, Jews were encouraged to settle in Italian cities (including towns in the Papal States, like Ancona) because they were able to offer valuable financial services. These affluent Jewish bankers also became patrons of the arts and sciences. The second period, roughly that of the Counter-Reformation, brought a new phenomenon, the Jewish ghetto, as well as other restrictive measures, including book censorship.
The term "ghetto" is often misunderstood and deserves brief comment. It comes from the name of the island Ghetto Nuovo, on which the first enclosed Jewish quarter in Venice was established in 1516. This original "ghetto" was created as a measure to allow Ashkenazi moneylenders to live in the city. Later, in 1541, as Sephardic Jewish merchants from the Ottoman Empire became an increasingly active presence in the city, the Venetian government granted these "Levantine" Jews their own segregated area of the city, the adjoining Ghetto Vecchio, which was connected to the Ghetto Nuovo by a wooden footbridge over a canal. There is no consensus on the meaning of the word, but some scholars argue that it derives from an old Italian word for "foundry," because a foundry had existed in the Ghetto Nuovo.
It was only in the decades after Pope Paul IV issued the 1555 papal bull Cum Nimis Absurdum that the establishment of Jewish ghettos became accepted policy throughout Italy. (It was not until the 1590s that the term "ghetto" was adopted by contemporaries to refer to the many enclosed Jewish quarters that by then had been established.) The creation of an enclosed Jewish quarter where all Jews were required to live sometimes actually led to the creation of a formal Jewish community. This was the case for the Jews of Tuscany, who were forced to move to a newly created Jewish quarter in Florence in 1571. Until that time, Jews in Tuscany had not been viewed by Tuscan authorities (or by themselves) as a collective "Jewish community." These Jews, numbering 712 persons altogether according to a census taken prior to the establishment of the ghetto, had lived scattered in 21 Tuscan towns. They had been regarded by town and Tuscan officials as individuals or individual families, rather than a Jewish community.
While the ghetto in Rome was created shortly after the issuance of Cum Nimis Absurdum, the ghettoization of Italian Jewry was a rather lengthy process. Some were only created in the seventeenth century: Verona in 1600, Mirandola in 1602, Padua in 1603, Mantua in 1612, Rovigo in 1613, Ferrara in 1624. The last ghetto was established in Corregio in 1779. Sometimes difficulties in establishing the ghetto arose because Christians did not want to give up their properties and transfer them to Jews, as happened in Regio Emilia where the process of establishing a ghetto started in 1611 but was not completed till 1670.
Despite the hardships that ghettoization brought to the Jewish community, such as being forced to rent apartments from Christian landlords at high prices, overcrowding, and the imposition of a nightly curfew, Jewish scholarship and culture flourished. Naturally, ghettoization did not inhibit creativity in the traditional Jewish areas of halakhah and kabbalah. Although physically separated from Christians in their dwellings, Jews did not in fact live in cultural isolation from their Italian Christian neighbors. Evidence from Christian courts further suggests that Jews and Christians studied together and socialized in pasticerias and grecolaias (pastry shops and wine shops often run by Greeks), eating and drinking together. An early sixteenth-century translation into Italian of a Yiddish manual for Jewish women on women's commandments indicates that Jewish women read Ariosto's Orlando Furioso and Boccaccio's Decameron, among other works. Theater, music, literature, and the sciences were cultivated by Jews in Hebrew, Ladino, and Italian (see the relevant sections below), leaving a treasure trove of evidence indicating a high level of Jewish acculturation and extensive Jewish-Christian interaction, at least at the elite level. Leone Modena, a seventeenth-century rabbi and intellectual, tells us in his memoirs of Christian dignitaries visiting synagogues to listen to sermons delivered by Jewish rabbis, including those of Modena himself. Modena, for his part, wrote poetry and panegyrics in Italian for his Christian patrons.
Primary Sources:
Samuel Aboab, Sefer Zikhronot,
Bernard Cooperman, University of Maryland, USA
Taverns and Public Drinking in Florence
Stefanie Siegmund, University of Michigan, USA
The City as a Place of Regulation, Border and Exclusion: Case of Livorno
Bernard Cooperman, University of Maryland, USA
Family Ties & Political Structure in Pisa and Livorno
Bernard Cooperman, University of Maryland, USA
Juveniles in Early Modern Jewish-Italian communities: Between Family Control and Kabbalistic Piety
Roni Weinstein, University of Pisa, Italy
The Documentation of Accidental Defloration among the Jews of Early Modern Italy
David Malkiel, Bar-Ilan University, Israel
A Challenge to Sexual and Marital Propriety and Communal Reaction
Kenneth Stow, Haifa University, Israel
Roth, C. "The Memoirs of a Siennese Jew (1625-1633)." Hebrew Union College annual V (1928): 353-402
"Leone Da Modena, the Virtuoso of Letter-Writing." In Letters of Jews through the Ages : From Biblical Times to the Middle of the Eighteenth Century, edited by Franz Kobler, 401-427. New York, N.Y.: East and West Library, 1978.
"Sumptuary and Other Police Laws: Forli, Italy, May 18, 1418." In The Jew in the Medieval World : A Source Book, 315-1791, edited by Jacob Rader Saperstein Marc Marcus, 220. Cincinnati: Hebrew Union College Press, 1999.
"Takkanot of Italy." In Jewish Self-Government in the Middle Ages, edited by Louis Finkelstein, 288-295, 297, 299-300, 304-306, 308-309, 312-314, 315. Westport: Conn., Greenwood Press, 1972.
Boccato, Carla. "The Testament of Jacob Cohen Ascanasi: The Family and Commerical Enterprise in the Venetian Ghetto at the End of the Sixteenth Century." Mediterranean Historical Review 8, no. 1 (1993): 120-124.
Secondary Sources:
Adelman, Howard Tzvi. "Law and Love: The Jewish Family in Early Modern Italy." Continuity and Change 16, no. 2 (2001): 283-303.
Beecher, Donald. "Leone De' Sommi and Jewish Theatre in Renaissance Mantua." Renaissance and Reformation 17, no. 2 (1993): 5-19.
Bonfil, Robert. "Change in the Cultural Patterns of a Jewish Society in Crisis: Italian Jewry at the Close of the Sixteenth Century." Jewish History 3, no. 2 (1988): 11-30.
Carpi, Daniel. "The Activity of The "Italian Congregation" Of Venice on Behalf of the Jewish Communities of Eretz Israel During the Years 1576-1733." Henoch 21, no. 3 (1999): 331-360.
Cooperman, Bernard Dov. "Ethnicity and Institution Building among Jews in Early Modern Rome." AJS Review 30, no. 1 (2006): 119-145.
Feci, Simona. "The Death of a Miller: A Trial "Contra Hebreos" In Baroque Rome." Jewish History 7, no. 2 (1993): 9-27.
Horowitz, Elliot. "Families and Their Fortunes: The Jews of Early Modern Italy." In Cultures of the Jews, edited by David Biale, 573-636: Schocken, 2002.
Malkiel, David. "The Ghetto Republic," in Davis and Ravid, The Jews of Early Modern Venice, 117-142, 273-276.
Ravid, Benjamin. "From Geographical Realia to Historical Symbol: The Odyssey of the Word "Ghetto"." In Essential Papers on Jewish Culture in Renaissance and Baroque Italy, edited by David B. Ruderman. New York: New York University Press, 1992.
—. "The Prohibition against Jewish Printing and Publishing in Venice and the Difficulties of Leone Modena." In Studies in Medieval Jewish History and Literature, edited by Isadore Twersky. Cambridge: Harvard University Press, 1979.
Ruderman, David B. "At the Intersection of Cultures: The Historical Legacy of Italian Jewry." In Gardens and Ghettos: The Art of Jewish Life in Italy, edited by Vivian Mann, 1-23. Berkeley and Los Angeles: University of California Press, 1989.
Ruderman, David B. and Giuseppe Veltri. "The Cultural Significance of the Ghetto in Jewish History." In From Ghetto to Emancipation: Historical and Contemporary Reconsiderations of the Jewish Community, edited by Myers David N. and William V. Rowe. Scranton, PA: University of Scranton Press, 1997.
Ruderman, David B. "Contemporary Science and Jewish Law in the Eyes of Isaac Lampronti of Ferrara and Some of His Contemporaries." In The Frank Talmage Memorial Volume, edited by Barry Walfish, 211-224. Haifa: Haifa University Press, 1992.
Tirosh-Samuelson, Hava. "Jewish Culture in Renaissance Italy: A Methodological Survey." Italia 9, no. 1-2 (1990): 63-96.
Images from JTS:
Bible. Prophets
Book of Jonah transliterated into Judeo-Italian (Tuscan dialect)
Italy, [16–]
Fol. 362r
Edict Ordering the Confiscation and Burning of the Talmud
Venice, 1553
Mahzor (Roman rite)
Soncino/Casal Maggiore: Benei Soncino, 1485/6
Vol. 2, fol. 117v-118r
Italy, 1496
Birkat ha-Mazon
Venice, 1603
Title page
Elegy by David Finzi in honor of Moses Zacuto
Mantua, 1697
Elegy by Shimon Hizkiyahu Lustro for Simon Hezekiah Lustro
Padua, 1699
Elegy, Moise Levi Muia and Leon Levi Muia (?)
Venice, 1706
Title page
Ma'aseh Tuviah
Venice: Bragadini, 1707
Fol. 106r
Elegy, Shimshon ben Yaakov Hacohen Modon for Yehudah Briel
Venice, 1722
Title page
Medaber Yehudah
Leone Modena
Venice, 1602
Title page

subset: commoncrawl


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A business lesson—and especially a life lesson—that I picked up from my rock & roll days is to maintain some skepticism towards leadership and authority. Especially when that authority appears to be unquestioned.
Bob Dylan said not to follow leaders. John Lennon said not to follow Dylan. Green Day's Billie Joe Armstrong said we're not meant to follow anybody and that we should even "revolt against the honor to obey." Strong stuff. It's too bad this sentiment has been endlessly trivialized on bumper stickers and lapel pins, because deference to hierarchy, obeisance to authority, uncritical acceptance of orthodoxy (economic, scientific, religious, etc.), and lack of critical thinking in general are among the most dangerous habits on ample display these days.
The business world is hardly exempt from this. If you work for a company you may be led to believe in the infallibility of your company's leaders—or in the unexamined goodness of your company's business model, practices, culture, etc. (If you're self-employed, you can substitute industry or field for company.) If you worked for a large investment bank in the middle of the last decade you probably believed in the bounteous benefits of financial "innovations" like unregulated credit default swaps, collateralized debt obligations, and other derivatives.
Imagine the economic misery the world would have been spared since 2008 if even a handful of business leaders had challenged the accepted wisdom of Wall Street and had spoken out—loudly—against the reckless practices that were continually defended by financial authorities and experts.
Of course it's difficult to maintain objectivity when you're surrounded by people in your community who share the same assumptions—which hardens into orthodoxy. Not just in financial services. When I consulted in the energy industry everyone seemed to assume that all environmentalists were ill-informed wackaloons, whose warnings could be ignored (including those concerning oil spills). And all environmentalists seemed to assume that all energy companies were run by avaricious, rapacious cartoon characters, who should never be trusted.
The lesson? Question assumptions. And take everything with a grain of sea salt. Including this blog.
Sometimes bumper stickers give good advice.
(To be continued in the month—and years—ahead.)


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Lead your armies to claim the throne in Stormfall: Age of War™! Only the brave will survive in this medieval online strategy game by Plarium!
This offer has a daily cap of - 100 leads/day per affiliate
|Promotion Not Allowed: No incent traffic, No virtual currency, No Google Content/Display Network, No Social (Facebook, local social networks, etc.), No mobile traffic
|Incentivizable: Offer IS NOT Incentivizable
Conversion Process: SOI
User Needs to Register


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Emily Pohl-Weary (Iron-on Constellations), Paul Hong (Your Love is Murder or The Case of the Mangled Pie) and Sandra Kasturi (The Animal Bridegroom) will all be appearing as part of Toronto Public Library's series Foresight: Speculative Fiction in Canada.
Tuesday, April 29, 7 p.m.
HOWTO write and publish genre fiction
A panel discussion with local authors Jim Munroe, Emily Pohl-Weary, Kristyn Dunnion and Paul Hong
Location: Eatonville Library, 430 Burnhamthorpe Rd.
Thursday, May 8, 5 p.m.
Learn about making a graphic novel with Emily Pohl-Weary and Willow Dawson, creators of Violet Miranda: Girl Pirate
Location: Centennial Library, 578 Finch Ave. W.
Monday, May 26, 7 p.m.
Noted feminists, poets and SF authors Candas Jane Dorsey, Paula Johanson, Sandra Kasturi and Phyllis Gotlieb read from and discuss their poetry. Q&A; and book-signing to follow.
Location: Oakwood Village Library, 341 Oakwood Ave.


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Thursday, March 18, 2004, Statesboro, Georgia — A couple who got into a dispute over a theological point after watching "The Passion of the Christ" were arrested after the argument turned violent.I'll say. They were well on their way to re-inventing the Arian Heresy. Next on Crossfire: The Filioque Clause!
The two left the movie theater debating whether God the Father in the Holy Trinity was human or symbolic, and the argument heated up when they got home, Melissa Davidson said."It was the dumbest thing we've ever done," she said.
Davidson, 34, and her husband, Sean Davidson, 33, were charged with simple battery on March 11 after the two called police on each other. They were released on $1,000 bail.Maybe they did, maybe they didn't. They're hardly the first people to wander into that tar pit. The night before the final balloting at the Council of Nicea, Saint Nicholas of Myra punched out Arius in a bar fight arising from a very similar argument.
According to a police report, Melissa Davidson suffered injuries on her arm and face, while her husband had a scissors stab wound on his hand and his shirt was ripped off. He also allegedly punched a hole in a wall."Really, it was kind of a pitiful thing, to go to a movie like that and fight about it. I think they missed the point," said Gene McDaniel, chief sheriff's deputy.
So just remember, kids: when you hear someone talking about "traditional Christianity," this is what they mean.
Arius was punched out by SANTA CLAUS??
That's rather shocking . . .
one should always fear
theological discourse
based on pop culture
inevitably leading
to the famed fifteen minutes
A scholastic looks at the Filioque clause:
I say he was just faking it, and I'll fight anyone who says different!
Maybe the MPAA should rate this thing NC-17 for explicit religion. What if that had been a couple of teenagers arguing over a doctrinal point that got their blood up? Won't someone please think of the children?
Okay, now I have to go re-read Agent of Byzantium just to get to the scene where Basil is caught out because he rejects the Filioque!
It's times like these that I wish I had a copy of Credo to bring to a con and play with all y'all.
I have Credo, the historically accurate game about early Church councils.
Actually, I've always wondered who their target market was for that game, apart from me -- and goodness knows, people do not normally bring out products aimed exclusively at the J-O segment of the population.
I haven't seen the Gibson film, but what I heard about it made it sound deeply Manichean.
However, I'm nopt surprised that it's provoked homousion disputes.
I thought of another all-new heresy myself the other day, but I'll save it for the next time I want to put one into a fantasy novel.
What a shame visual art cannot make a more lasting impression on the 'dominance of the left hemisphere'. I agree with Leonard Shlain - this is the dark side of literacy. Bible thumping leads to people thumping.
I've always been intrigued by Credo, but never run into a copy. Is it actually a good game, or one of those games carried by your appreciation of the joke?
Credo is a brilliant game, but it helps to play with someone who has played it before, because the rules don't explain how it works very well.
Actually, I can summarize what the rules leave out.
The game proceeds with people picking up cards in turn, and every so often this is punctuated with a church council when everyone goes mad and starts yelling and playing cards at each other and persecuting and making deals. It's a bit like Illuminati. No, strike that, it isn't.
We play it every Christmas, and I could bring it to a con if people wanted to play.
(Only US con currently planned for this year: Minicon.)
Ah, those were the days! Anyone remember when Avalon Hill (best known for their wargames) brought out Year of Our Lord (race madly around the Church Calendar) and Journeys of St. Paul (first one to Rome gets beheaded and wins!)?
I have discovered a truly remarkable heresy which this margin is too small to contain.
Not that I don't like a good theological argument, but after several decades as an Anglican then Roman Catholic (with Orthodox friends), mention of the filioque makes me want to wander back over to the discussion on booze over on Patrick's side. At least until I'm properly premedicated, er, prepared.
The Smoking Gun as pictures and such. I's trying to figure out what they remind me of . . .
I've always been intrigued by Credo, but never run into a copy. Is it actually a good game, or one of those games carried by your appreciation of the joke?
I haven't played it myself (I did own a copy at one time, but sold it), but general consensus seems to be that the theme is most of the game. It gets fairly mediocre ratings on BoardgameGeek (and even some of the higher ratings are really for the theme, if you read the comments). Mike Siggins (game reviewer extraordinaire) had this to say in his Sumo's Karaoke Club review:
I would summarise Credo as a classic experience game. It is fun to read the amazing (yet apparently entirely accurate) cards, exile the Bishop of Nicopolis to Upper Egypt and to mutilate the odd prelate. It isn't much fun to see an all-but-game winning flock numbered in the millions disappear and be able to do nothing to stop it. Oddly, this frustration seems to apply even if you don't much mind about winning, simply because a small flock and voting capacity reduce your involvement and enjoyment of the game. You often just sit there and say, 'Fine by me', because there is nothing you can influence anyway. Whatever, the interaction is there because you do of course try to do the same to some other sucker by proselytizing him and it always helps to be the Emperor (on an 'It's good to be the King' basis). The end result is that you go with the flow, griping as required by events, and savour the game as a sort of Bible Belt theme park ride.
And of course it's not easy to find a copy nowadays, as Chaosium's print run was small. The French edition is easier to find (well, if you're in France, anyway) and has much better components, but does have rather a lot of French text in it that you'd need to be able to read.
I thought of another all-new heresy myself the other day,[....]
For what it's worth, that reminds me perfectly of why I miss RASFF so much. Maybe after November I'll be able to get back to it.
I have discovered a truly remarkable heresy which this margin is too small to contain.
Jim, you owe my employer a new keyboard....
Ah, those were the days! Anyone remember when Avalon Hill (best known for their wargames) brought out Year of Our Lord (race madly around the Church Calendar) and Journeys of St. Paul (first one to Rome gets beheaded and wins!)?
Yup. Or rather, I don't actually remember that (before I was born), but I've seen them.
There are a fair number of religious games out these days. Cactus Game Design has done a number of them, including a Biblical collectible card game, the boardgame Redemption: City of Bondage (not nearly as interesting as it sounds, I'm afraid), and Settlers of Canaan, which is a (licensed) Biblical version of the very popular Settlers of Catan.
And then there's the Mormon game company, Inspiration Games. It's the religious label of Uberplay Games, which does "German-style" and German board and card games. Inspiration has so far released Settlers of Zarahemla (Settlers of Catan again, this time using a Mormon background) and Ark of the Covenant (a Biblical version of the game Carcassonne).
Credo is a brilliant game, but it helps to play with someone who has played it before, because the rules don't explain how it works very well.
Ah - so it's exactly like religion, then?
Makes the classic mother's statement that what you kids are fighting over doesn't make one iota of difference meaningful instead of cliched though.
For some reason the post title reminded me of this (which I hope hasn't been mentioned already).
"Only US con planned for this year -- Minicon."
Sounds like a date to me. You want to warn Pamela, or should I?
Jim, I also recall (having a long history with AH) when they released the "Witchcraft" and "Black Magic" DIY kits. (You could even buy replacement chalk and candles from the parts catalog.) I guess they wanted to hedge their bets.
And suddenly I kinda sorta vaguely wanna design a second-stage version of Credo ("Credo: New Celestial Order?" "Grand Design III: Cities of Vice and Virtue?" "Celebrity Pro Wrestling with Angels?") but I should probably find something else to do.
I read your double dactyls page a while back and have been attempting them on my blog. I think this deserves one:
Scissorthorn Scissorthorns
Melissa Davidson
Saw Mel Gibson's movie
Started a fight
With her husband over
And ended up in jail
To Christs Delight?
Finity trinity
Mel Gibson, movie star
Rakes in the bucks with a
Film about Christ;
Fights soon ensue over
Missing the point of what
He sacrificed.
The best game of Credo I ever played was with a bunch of theology grads I went to school with. Egads, the wonderful heresies we developed. Brings back the old days.
Next pre- or post-con y'all have time to spend up here at chez Hanger-Phillips, the Credo is on me (local friend from same student days has a copy, but I wouldn't ask him to lend it without him being present -- wouldn't be fair; besides, as has been said, it's hard to find now). I think with some suitable libations, we could come up with some pretty good pseudotheology.
Hmm... personally, I'm just a little disappointed that "The Passion of the Christ" doesn't include the bit where Christ lets his disciples and the assembled multitudes know that, 'Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power.' But maybe that was only (in the words of the Australian prime minister) a "non-core" promise. I'm sure that Christ was perfectly accurate with everything else he had to say.
John C. Bunnell, there was a tune going through my head as soon as I read your poem, and with a moment or two of thought I pinned it down as "The Housewive's Lament", which your words fit to perfectly... And the chorus almost works untouched,
"O life is a toil,
And love is a trouble,
Beauty will fade
And riches will flee,
Wages will dwindle
And prices will double
And nothing is as I
Would wish it to be."
Which, Madeleine, means all double dactyls should fit to it (JohnB's was much better than Michael's IMO, not requiring forced scansion).
Higgledy piggledy
Good Old Saint Nicholas
Came down the chimney
That cold Christmas night.
Inside, the children quite
Set up the Yule log
And asked for a light.
(in collaboration over 30 years ago with James Langdell)
Mm. Was anyone besides me distracted by the optical illusion on the St. Nicholas link? Took me several minutes to be able to turn my eyes away from it to read the text. And I'm a compulsive reader.
As for the Credo game -- goodness, that sounds like a panel to me...! Jo, Teresa, and Mike? You'd pack the room.
I'll second the consensus on CREDO. The gameplay is lacking, but the game is remarkably fun to read and fiddle with. Plus, the historical pamphlet it comes with is as concise and well-written a history of the early Church as you'll likely ever see.
The basic gameplay is centered around negotiating the Nicean Creed. Player introduce various articles and then vote, backstab, and connive to get them integrated into the final draft. What makes it brilliant is that the game contains ALL of the possible interpretations of the faith that existed at that time - you can get a dualistic creed ("I believe in two gods..."), a gnostic creed, arian, monophysique, or even a pagan creed ("I believe in one God, Jesus Christ, CHOSEN AVATAR OF THE UNCONQUERED SUN"). Most likely you'll end up with an incoherent collection of contradictory articles making up the final creed - like others have said, it's historically accurate!
All of this takes place against a backdrop of historical events and manuevering. Declare heresies, browbeat other bishops into joining your faction, discover the true cross, lobby to incorporate apocryphal works into the New Testament (think how much cooler the Bible would be if it had The Miracles Of The Infant Jesus or The Secret Testimony of Mary Magdalene) - it's all there. There are some pretty sly jokes in the card mix, too - many of the different Creed articles are phrased nearly identically, and I think the true cross can be discovered more than once.
The game really shines in its concept - the notion that the bedrock principles of modern christianity were derived by no-holds-barred political manuevering and blind chance, best represented by Illuminati or Junta style gameplay can be a real shock to the system of someone who isn't familiar with how contentious the early church was. The historical accuracy makes the game's point hard to dismiss. Plus, the notion of rewriting the Nicene Creed as an explicitly pagan (or zoroastrian, or neo-platonic) document is just too much fun, despite the so-so gameplay.
John B wrote:
"I'm just a little disappointed that "The Passion of the Christ" doesn't include the bit where Christ lets his disciples and the assembled multitudes know that, 'Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power.'"
I always took that to mean that Jesus was aware of the presence of functional immortals in the world, and recognized a few of them in the crowd. Possibly vampires.
Heck, what if he just saw the wandering Jew?
By the way, I'm a little surprised that no one has questioned my characterization of the incident with Nicholas and Arius as a "bar fight." The answer is that they were holding these meetings in taverns.
Credo sounds like a wonderful game, as though someone had anticipated the eventual existence of rasff; and it makes me even sorrier that I'm not going to Minicon this year. We could have a memorable amount of fun.
Everyone knows this is the actual period and process that gave rise to the very first flame wars, right?
Jo, if I'd run across this game when it first came out, I too would have wondered what their target market was, aside from me. But why not? Isn't our culture full of things which, as far as you and I are concerned, might as well have resident interstellar aliens as their target market?
I suspect the real impetus behind that game was the same one that currently drives the production of arcane "What kind of ________ are you?" tests: someone knows enough about the subject to devise it, and is sufficiently enthusiastic about it to want to do so.
Nancy, you're on, whenever that it may.
CREDO sounds fun, and I could probably round up at least three other players who don't belong to religious orders. Of course, that does not rule out my giving it to a Jesuit friend as a Christmas gift (insert cruel laughter).
On the subject of the movie, I saw it, liked it, and was able to describe a part of it to a curious friend as "Satan? Yes, imagine an Evil Xaan from Farscape, only not blue . . ."
Here in small town Worcester, everyone is talking about it. I couldn't get past government building security guards the other day without one of them noticing that my wallet (had to empty my pockets) had a small picture of Jesus laughing on it. ("Who's that?" "Jesus." "Laughing?" "He wasn't crucified the whole time, you know." "Oh, right. Did you see the movie?")
So would a "Left Behind" film in any way be considered the sequal?
Cat D: A "Left Behind" movie actually exists. And it has a sequel: Left Behind 2: Tribulation Force. I am not (as they say) Making This Up.
Somewhere back up in the Comments, somebody mentioned "City of Bondage" with a brief dismissal. It probably *is* that dull, but my husband the ultra-experienced (know-it-all?) history gamer tells me the theme is "Biblical heroes battle monsters." Sounds almost as good as a wrestling-with-angels smackdown. (This thread is great!)
Carlos - DC's Last Supper is genius, but I just can't figure this out: who are the characters standing in for John and Simon?
That is indeed the theme insofar as I can tell. When I said it wasn't as interesting as it sounds I wasn't referring to the gameplay, but to, er, the other possible theme for a game called City of Bondage.
As for Credo, it was published by a small game company (The Chaosium) in small numbers, so they didn't really need much of a target market (they also did a really cheap production job, so it couldn't have cost them much). There are enough gaming geeks around who would find the idea to be cool to support that. Heck, I bought a copy.
Anyone inspired by this thread to get the game will unfortunately have a difficult time of it (unless, as noted, they can read French). There is one guy on BoardgameGeek who has a copy for trade, which I'd have to say is the best bet at the moment.
Jo: If you play Credo at Minicon, I want in! I have a set I could bring, too.
Jason: I don't know enough about the composition of Da Vinci's Last Supper to know who John and Simon are. I'll just list all the characters in that image, left to right: The Martian Manhunter, Catwoman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Lex Luthor, Lightray (one of Jack Kirby's "New Gods"), Superman, Batman, Bizarro, Flash, Hawkgirl, Green Lantern, and I'm not sure about the last but am guessing Speedy (who hasn't appeared in Justice League but has in Teen Titans).
I leave it to those more knowledgeable than me to explain the various correspondences between Apostles and super-characters. I wonder in particular about Catwoman and Bizarro.
I just noticed the Kryptonite knife in Lex's hand (I assume he's in the role of Judas Iscariot); rather cool.
Well, from my memory of my one art history class and the best I've been able to find online, the order in the Last Supper, from left to right, is Bartholomew, James, Andrew, Judas, Peter, John, Christ, Thomas, James, Philip, Matthew, Thaddeus and Simon.
This would put Speedy (possible the new Green arrow, now that I think about it) in the role of Simon, Batman in the role of Thomas (appropriate, to certain readings of Batman), Lightray in the role of John, Luthor in the role of Peter (very interesting) and Aquaman, oddly enough, in the role of Judas.
My guess, really, is that the artist just wanted to do the picture and put Superman in as Christ. The rest he probably just wanted to match poses with and didn't give a lot of thought to the iconography.
Well, back to listening to Jesus Christ Superstar for me...
I'd be willing to bet money that the artist was misinformed about who was who and switched Peter with Judas -- Luthor with a Kryptonite knife just has to be Judas, while Aquaman makes sense for Peter the former fisherman.
Rea: I was wondering that too--if Nicholas of Myra was the same Nicholas. (There are way too many Saints with the same names, but that's what happens when you insist on a particular naming convention for your kiddies.)
I read this aloud to Lee (my bf) and he giggled, of course. He keeps making references to the Passionfruit of Christ, which make me wish I was better at Flash, since there are so many places I could go with that.
Faren: at least "City of Bondage" is a dull board game where "Biblical heroes battle monsters." For Christmas last year one of my friends got me the mind-blisteringly awful computer game "The War in Heaven," which is billed as "A Christian Action Game."
It's a bad adaptation of Quake: you get to pick whether you're an angel defending Heaven or a demon bent on conquering it and play as that character.
I've never played the game through to the ending. The novelty of playing a demon wears off after a while (it's obvious that there's a real Deus ex Machina ending) or a headache (Hell's color scheme is red and neon green). The angels are too wimpy to use effectively--a sling with a rock is their default weapon. (Heaven's decor, also, leaves something to be desired. I didn't expect knockoff Italianate fountains or reliefs of Babylonian oxen on the walls).
I did find it amusing, however, that the game comes with cheat codes. This leads to all sorts of interesting ethical dilemmas: do you use the code to get the holy sword and beat Satan's minions, or will cheating doom your soul to perdition?
Made a wonderful gag gift, though.
Credo looks interesting. Perhaps I'll pick it up.
Odd. I was quite sure that I'd seen, just in passing, just a couple of weeks back, a box of Christian 'Monopoly' in a shop somewhere in Sydney. I'd connected it with recent "Passion" marketing. A very quick search hasn't turned one up of the sort I saw at, e.g. http://monopoly.foronlinegames.com
This did turn up elsewhere: Bibleopoly "The object of this game, also played on a "monopoly-style" game board is to build a church. The first player to build a church on any city space is the winner..."
There are a number of "Board Games with a Religious Theme" listed here,
Part 1: Looking for strategy games which incorporate religion
Part 2: More games with a religious theme
but I don't think these are like the one I saw either - tho' they don't have pictures.
The lists do include games mentioned earlier by commenters. They ask for extra info: "If you can add any games to the list -- or provide more information about the games already included -- please post a note in the About Board Games Forum.", maybe some of you could add to it.
We're having an unusually heated & hotly-contested local government election for Sydney City Council. This discussion has me thinking of modifying a current board game with appropriate names, places and themes. Snakes & Ladders comes to mind, along with Monopoly, or p'raps something along the lines of Credo (Credo di Dio Crudel!).
CHANCE: Take a ride on the Monorail. Pay the Bank $2 and lose one turn.
Mr. Goldfarb -
As applicable as Aquaman may be to the role of Peter, the apostle Peter in Da Vinci's painting actually does carry a knife (remember Peter cutting off the Roman soldier's ear?) Thus, Lex is more than likely cast in the role of Peter, though how much thought the artist put into that decision is up for debate.
- Kevin
...who's sat through one too many Sunday School lessons...
Heck, what if he just saw the wandering Jew?
At the very least there was Ahasuerus, the Wandering Jew. Also, Malchus, the Roman guy whose ear Peter cut off, also immortal. Plus, there're all the timetravelers from Up the Line. This leaves out the three Nephilim, and any number of other immortals who would have probably shown up.
If this were a perfect one-to-one match with Earth-Prime's Last Supper, Bizarro would be the James on the far left, James the Younger, since the Golden Legend records he looked enough like Christ to be mistaken for him. But Bizarro is sitting in James the Elder's place, and James the Younger's place is *empty*, perhaps just vacated by Wonder Woman (who appears to be on her way to stop Luthor).
Therefore, one has to conclude the seating arrangement must have been different on Earth-LS.
Same thing for Luthor with a Kryptonite knife. Why would that be an attribute of *Peter's*? Probably Aquaman had to rest his prosthetic.
Incidentally, the canonical match of apostles' names to figures in the Last Supper wasn't determined until the early nineteenth century, when captions on a mid-16th century copy were discovered. Before that, people were matching the apostles up by age and by guesswork. Two hundred years of retcons.
Rao be with you all,
Speaking of heated religious debates in the early Christian years, there is something of that feel to the current US arguing about "under God" in the Pledge. (Just no punching out -- so far.)
See the NY Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2004/03/22/national/22SCOT.html?hp
What bothers me about this story is the fighting, and the fact I can see it happening on my campus. Actually, I wouldn't be surprised to hear of something similar in class today, there was a campus-sponsored trip to the movie this weekend.
*grin* I know I've had words over doctrinal issues here. It's fun debating with others who have a clue. We just don't come to blows.
"Everyone knows this is the actual period and process that gave rise to the very first flame wars, right?"
I hate to argue a point, any point, with the hostess with the mostest cool weblog, but this was not the period of the first flame wars [unless you count the literal flambeeing of dissidents]. I won't claim the ancient Greeks invented flame wars, but they certainly indulged in them. One of the more notorious must be Diogenes' dismissal of Plato's definition of a man [an erect, featherless biped] by depositing a plucked chicken labeled "Plato's man" in a highly public place. Plato seems to have attracted this kind of thing; his fellow disciple of Socrates, Xenophon, complained in his own philosophical works that Plato misquoted, misrepresented, and misstated the Master's teachings for his own ends. Further trawls through the history of ancient philosophy would no doubt produce more, although I don't think Seneca's piece on the deificaiton of the Emperor Claudius would count, as Claudius was in no condition to riposte by then.
However, since the early church fathers were able to swing the fate of empire, or at least start a pretty good riot over their doctrinal points, I'd have to admit that their flame wars were a lot more deadly. Plato may have thought about killing Diogenes, but the rest of Athens was too busy snickering for him to assemble a decent mob.
fidelio: flamage is heat in place of light. Diogenes was not flaming Plato but pointing out a gaping hole in the argument; it would have been a flame if Plato had asked why Diogenes was putting his mother on display in the nude, and the start of a flame war if Diogenes had then asked why Plato couldn't recognize his own father....
CHip, that settles the chicken, especially since Plato then emended his definition, but please check out what Xenophon had to say about Plato--I don't believe that generated much light, although it was quite heated, at least on Xenophon's side (we have no record, as far as I know, on Plato's reaction).
Diogenes was not flaming Plato but pointing out a gaping hole in the argument; it would have been a flame if Plato had asked why Diogenes was putting his mother on display in the nude, and the start of a flame war if Diogenes had then asked why Plato couldn't recognize his own father....
My cats just gave me worried looks because of extreme giggling. Nice one.
Where can I get a copy of Credo? It sounds like the perfect birthday present for my girlfriend, the theologian.
As has been mentioned, _Credo_ was printed only once, in a small run, a long time ago. It's hard to find now. (Most of the people who have it aren't selling, either.) You might try advertising on rec.games.board.marketplace.
OK, here's the definitive list of Places to Get Credo:
New French copies [of Credo] are available ... The cards are nicer than those in the English edition, but of course they're in French, and this is an extremely text-heavy game, so unless you read French quite well you're out of luck.
Running the cards' text through an automated online translator would add a whole new dimention to the game! (er. A dimention is a demented dimension, by the way.) In fact, a whole new sub-game of demention (which isn't saying to twice) could be developed by trying to say which differing translations from different translators came from the same 'ur-text'.
Then you set them to music.
Haven't yet worked out a knitting-related link, tho' I feel that something could be developed along the lines of Madam Defarge's coded knitting. Or again, maybe make a warm drink now & bed. Just back from a final performance of a funny (yet oddly disturbing) production of "The Merry Widow", am perhaps a bit 'overexcited'.
At least it stops me from trying to work out an epilogue to John Adam's "The Death of Klinghofer" the film of which was shown here in the annual January Sydney Festival. Abu Abbas, who planned the Achille Lauro hijacking, was captured almost a year ago in Baghdad and died in custody earlier this month. I keep mentally connecting elderly men in wheelchairs dying violently. Probably better to think on the ferry trip home on a moonless night under the stars.
Actually, Lex Luthor is perfect as 'Judas' from the gnostic point of view (haven't you read the DaVinci Code?)and even the protestant point of view, among others. Peter is the arch-hero of the institutional church, the politicized church, the purveyors of the Nicene Creed, which essentially 'offed' the message of Christ: the kingdom of God is within you. Trust me, I've thought a lot about this in the years since graduating with a master's degree in theology from the Graduate Theological School in Berkeley in 1985. Lots of time to think it all over...
....and to read Peter Brown, who gives us the real skinny on early Xtn history, the 'world of late antiquity', augustine, and other artifacts and relics of European cultural history.
And speaking of bar fights, Jerome was another scrapper, although most of his pugilisms were confined to written letters. His long-time companion, Paula, (ever heard of her? she was the better hebrew and greek scholar, and made it possible for jerome to translate the vulgate) restrained him from the worst excesses of his temper.


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Nathan Adamson owns and operates a small recording facility and label: FourReelz Records, and Ferralog Studios in Deep Ellum. What caught our attention was the spotlight feature he does for new artists: "Catch & Release", where they record a band in one day, on all-analog gear, then have a release show the very next night. The studio also has a live stage and bar, for the love of Pete.
See also: -"Local Music 'Mericans" Archives - Midlake Invite Us Into Their Denton Studio
Adamson is also a local musician. A multi-instrumentalist, at that. Among the bands he's been seen with are THe BAcksliders. And yes, this is a column about the behind-the-scenes non-performers. But, more often than not we seem to find a musician embedded in the supportive person in the music community we profile....a musician who is so into contributing to the overall community that they've actually put the instruments to the side for a spell to focus on supporting others.
I asked you recently to rave about a new local act that you love. You made me laugh when you told me how they came about.
The Venetian Sailors! Fronted by Robbie Saunders with Aaron Kenneth on guitar and vocals, Shane Keil on upright bass and Nigel Newton on Vibes, keys and percussion. They formed when the owner of the B4 antique store, Sam Thompson, needed a band to play his store's grand opening.
And when I asked about your influences in your youth, you made me laugh again! Not mockingly, but just in a "you never know" kind of way.
Barry Manilow's 1977 LIVE album? It's pretty much what I've based my entire life on.
The first record I fell in love with as a child was a collection of Scott Joplin rags played by Joshua Rifkin.
How did you come up with Catch & Release? It's very thoughtful and innovative. Recording and releasing on one day is also terribly risky, but that makes it exciting and probably very motivating to the artists. Give us a little background on it.
It's something I've wanted to do for a while, but when Leslie Sakal, who works at our studio as an engineer, wanted some of her friends from Santa Fe University to stop in Dallas and play a show, I suggested that they record on Monday and release the album the next day. The Band was Treemotel and the record, called Girls, was named one of the top albums of the year in a Santa Fe music blog. The other three artists that have made C&R records are The Marfalites, Jaisun Williams' Complex Simplicity and the Venetian Sailors. I'm currently finishing a C&R for three singer-songwriters named Billy Bones, Hank Van Hawkins, and Zach Fox. Their five song E.P. is being released at Ferralog on January 31.
Are you getting hit with a lot of submissions for Four Reels? What are you looking for from musicians?
We haven't done a lot of promotion yet. It's pretty much word-of-mouth at this point and of course the Catch and Release shows help to get the name out as well. I'm really only interested in artists who are making art to survive. If you have a cushy day job you are never going to be able to dedicate the amount of time needed to make great music. There are exceptions to this of course, but in my experience the worst thing a musician can do is to get a GOOD job. I have several artists in mind but I can say that the Venetian Sailors will be the first band on our Label. FOURREELZRECORDS works like a co-op, which means that the artists will be owners of the label.
What about school experiences? Any music memories there?
I've always considered traditional schooling as a massive, deliberate waste of time. I did play in the jazz band in junior high and high school but there really wasn't much playing happening because there were three drummers and we had to take turns. It was, nevertheless, the only reason I went to school at all.
I understand you're a big fan of Cricket Taylor's band, The Electromagnetics. I reviewed their new LP last year, I think?
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It was a few years ago, but one of the nicest suprises I've experienced in DFW was seeing the Electromagnetics play before one of my bands, The Backsliders, at City Tavern. Their drummer, Gerard Bendiks, is one of the most interesting musicians I've ever seen. I had the opportunity to record him at my temporary studio in Garland as well as the new Ferralog Studio in Deep Ellum.
When I asked you what you'd do if you were made Mayor of the music scene, your answer reminded me of what Frank Zappa might do in the same scenario.
Hmmmmm. Musicians are a true subculture. We live a bubble where almost everyone is participating voluntarily and that is a beautiful thing. After turning the Union Bank building into a Casino, I would abolish the Mayor's office.


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One week after protesting St. Petersburg's anti-gay laws at her concert and 24 hours after being sued for doing exactly that (apparently defending gay rights has a $10 million price tag), Madonna is lashing out against the Russian government for its decision to sentence punk protesters Pussy Riot to two years in prison.
In the first line of her blunt appraisal of the sentencing, Madonna highlights the ridiculousness of their punishment, pointing out they will be behind bars "for two years for a 40 second performance extolling their political opinions." Despite being an entirely factual statement, it effectively points out the absurdity of what happened to these three women: They slammed their president for 40 seconds, and now they'll spend approximately 438 hours in jail for every second of that performance. Insane? Well, yeah.
"Even if one disagrees with the location or how they chose to express themselves, the sentence is too harsh and in fact is inhumane," Madonna said. "I call on all those who love freedom to condemn this unjust punishment. I urge artists around the world to speak up in protest against this travesty. They've spent enough time in jail. I call on ALL of Russia to let Pussy Riot go free."
Boom! Russian justice system just got served by Madonna. Although to be honest, there's no way "ALL of Russia" is going to join her in demanding these women have their just freedom. After all, this is a country where nine people are suing her for urging audience members to treat gay folk with "respect, tolerance and love." It's a good bet that segment of the population isn't terribly broken up about the fate of a band called Pussy Riot.


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As summer winds down, we begin to see an uptick in patients with influenza, a virus that infects the respiratory system, often causing a sudden onset of fever, cough, sore throat, and body aches. Fall is the best time of year to get vaccinated against the virus, which typically peaks during the winter months. Although the flu virus infects millions of Americans each year, resulting in nearly 200,000 hospitalizations and thousands of deaths, less than half of adults get a flu shot. Perhaps busy schedules and forgetfulness are partly to blame. But there is also a lot of misinformation circulating about the flu vaccine, leading some people to opt out of a valuable form of preventive care. As an infectious diseases specialist, I'll help you separate flu facts from fiction.
Q: What is the best way to protect yourself from the flu?
The flu vaccine is the most effective way to protect yourself from getting the flu, and it's recommended for anyone six months of age or older. Even if you are healthy and rarely get sick, getting the flu shot can protect others around you who may be at greater risk of becoming very sick from the flu, such as those with chronic illnesses, cancer, weakened immune systems and infants.
Q: If I get a flu shot, can I still get the flu?
Yes. It can take up to two weeks for the vaccine to build up your body's immunity to the virus, so getting a flu shot early in the fall—when the virus is not circulating at peak levels—gives you the best protection against the flu.
Each year, the vaccine is developed to protect against specific strains of influenza. If a different strain begins to circulate, the vaccine may not be as effective. Still, a flu shot can help reduce the severity of flu symptoms if you contract the virus.
Q: Can the flu vaccine cause you to get the flu?
No. The flu vaccine contains a killed virus, so it cannot give you the flu.
Q: Is there anyone who should not get a flu shot?
If you have severe allergies, especially to the ingredients in the flu shot, or a history of Guillain Barre Syndrome, talk to your doctor before getting vaccinated. There may be other options for vaccination.
With any vaccine, there can be side effects, such as soreness at the injection site or a mild skin reaction.
Q: If I get the flu virus, what should I do?
If you are experiencing severe symptoms, make an appointment to see your doctor. We often prescribe antiviral medications, which can shorten the duration of your symptoms. It's most effective when started within 48 hours of symptom onset.
Stay at home for at least 24 hours after your fever subsides. While you're at home, isolate yourself from others and wash your hands often to avoid spreading the virus. It's possible to transmit the flu virus for up to eight days, starting from the day before you actually experience symptoms.
Q: Where can I find more information about flu prevention?
Just log on to kp.org and type "flu" in the search bar.
Scott Cutro, MD
Chief, Infectious Diseases
Dr. Scott Cutro practices at the Kaiser Permanente Cumberland Medical Center in Atlanta. He is dual board certified in internal medicine and infectious diseases. He completed internal medicine residency at Emory University and an infectious diseases fellowship at New York University. To learn more about his approach to care, visit kp.org.
Sponsored by: Scott Cutro, MD, Chief, Infectious Diseases | Kaiser Permanente of Georgia | www.kp.org


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Monthly Archives: July 2016
Poems from My Day (7-23-16)
i'm having trouble getting past the it's okay to make mistakes phase of writing
It's an old wound,
Annoyingly, still hurting.
But, she knows the name of his roommate,
And what classes he's taking,
What food they serve at his dorm,
What he's doing with his money.
She's planning to pack a first-aid box for him.
They've ordered his laptop.
He'll pay them back.
She's rearranging her schedule around for his move-in date.
To my heart, the mundane details she knows,
Are quiet proof that she loves him more.
Her time, the thing I always wanted from her,
She gives so freely to the last of her kids.
Sure, there are other people out there being lonely too,
But you can't have a cup of tea with them
And take apart your day,
Piece by piece and song by song.
If you don't say what you're thinking,
Are you still being yourself?
If you stop yourself enough times, do you keep thinking it,
Or have you changed your ways for good?
If I never say the snarky thing I'm thinking,
Do I become the quiet thing I've always tried to be?
I remember in college a boy with Justin Bieber hair,
Telling me to stop saying sorry,
I could only say sorry in response.
Really I wanted to say,
I can say whatever the hell I want, to whomever I choose.
But I didn't have the balls.
Doughy. I feel like a whale.
Like they only look at me because I'm new in such a small town.
And female.
But on the other hand, none of the women here have that beauty complex you see
In the lower 48,
The constant, I'm not thin enough talk, just doesn't happen up here.
Useless. I'm useless.
These hands do nothing.
This brain, such an expensive brain, sits there on idle.
This body has started decaying,
And I can't bring myself to care.
Poems from My Day (7-21)
more to come
They wouldn't cross me, and they're true.
I'm not friends with the wishy-washy people.
I'm friends with the weirdos.
And I don't think you understand exactly what that means.
I'm the most traditionally stable of the bunch. We get stared at when we go out.
I won't make the easy friend.
Not anymore,
My people contemplate suicide on a daily basis, and wax rhapsodic about why they stay alive.
They get tattoos of little hearts that say – "always keep fighting,"
They tell me they stay alive because they don't want their families sad.
I've set up google alerts for their names, deceased.
My red-haired Paul Bunyan, I've been watching his twin sister's facebook, waiting.
I'm friends with the people who will tell me how they're really feeling, because they're braver than I am.
Who tell me about their visits to the restaurant brothels of Thailand, who tell me more and more outrageous things, poke me with a stick, see how long it takes me to freak.
But they never judge me. They'll tell me I'm stupid, that I'm not living up to what I could be, that I should try relaxing.
Thinking about it, the thing they have in common is that they've never given me that – you're crazy look, the one that says – I don't understand you, you're weird to me.
Okay Jade,
I figured it out,
You asked about my favorite book, and said I was just like your teacher because I fell in love with things. Now I remember being that age, and not loving anything, and being worried I'd never have hopes or dreams. But I do now.
It's a book written by the same woman who wrote 101 Dalmatians
About these two sisters before the second war in England.
It was the first time I remember reading something I had experienced. It was so wonderful to see, to read, someone else explain exactly why I felt the way I felt.
She couldn't bring herself to love the man her sister had her hands on before her.
And these were the silly problems, the problems you got to think about before all the men started dying again.
I couldn't bring myself to love the man who loved my sister. I had that problem. Just like her.
I remember being just like her.
Just like someone for the first time.
I think I have a dreams now,
I want my cabin in the middle of nowhere that's within driving distance of a coke slushie machine, it'll have a wrap-around porch and a rocking chair, and those thick, tapestry like throw blankets. And tea. Lots of tea.
And warm lights, none of these white, fluorescent things.
And I'll do hospice work, and maybe take in foster kids. And I'll have books piled everywhere. I'll be able to make mistakes there. That's what will be great.
I think that's true. I think people you can make mistakes in front of, are the best creative partners.
Who you know won't mock you.
Or who will go along with you on your journeys. Those are the best.
Together, we do good stuff.
I cried when I got the check my father sent me,
And cried harder when the post office lost the next one.
I get frustrated that I can't qualify for benefits because I have savings.
Then I give up. And say I'll just live in debt. It's easier.
I want to say to her, no,
I won't be jerked around.
You want to be my friend, then be my friend,
Don't waver in the wind like a pussy.
I'm tired of this.
I'll give you allowances, here and there, and wiggle room for not knowing me, and feeling uncomfortable, but I have to be around people who are stronger than me, because I need the strength they give.
So, either be here when I need you or get out of my way.
I do so many things poorly, and nothing well.
But if I spent all my time, and had one great accomplishment,
Someone would still do it better.
They gave me a cedar rose and now my jacket smells like campfire smoke and cedar.
My house smells like campfire smoke and cedar.
He used to smell like gasoline.
My couch used to smell like vinegar and yellow Clorox wipes.
If my cold weren't here I'd smell charred chorizo.
My mother called on my birthday.
She did the thing I love, but have always been to scared to tell her I love,
In case she'll stop.
She tells me stories about when I was a baby.
And it was just me and her.
About when I was born,
And how pretty I was, and how loved.
Every year it makes me cry, because I like to think of my mother as a person who only causes harm,
But she loves us so much. And sometimes she lets it show through.
And it makes me miss my mom.
Little Purple Flowers
Editor's Note: I'm offering these cute little flowers as an apology for a lack of posting new material in keeping with my schedule. I'll be double posting this Monday to Wednesday. So if you get emails when I publish, expect more than usual this week from me.