text:
Chapter One: 1:00 am
You have 1 new friend request.
I stare at the thick blue bar on the top of my phone screen.
Fuck friends. Fuck phones. Fuck everybody.
I slide my fingers over the phones oily surface and stare at the poor bastard who would dare be my friend.
Jimmy that guy who I met at the Gym. We have three mutual friends. I accept his friend request, aware that despite doing so I will probably never speak to him again.
I stare at the news feed, see a friend complaining about her city commute and her desire to strangle this Chinese dude blasting Chinese music on the train beside her. My friend in France showcases a lovely picture of herself in a black floral dress with white fluffy wings. Facebook suggests that I should get into adorable decorative baskets, and the side bar keeps showing me sites for singles.
And I stare, I stare until my eyes water, until my pulse begins to quicken dangerously because the physical exertion of holding myself in this transfixed sedentary position, is threatening to bring on a family history of asthma attacks, high blood pressure, hernias, strokes, and untested mental instability.
Hi, my name is Dan.
You might think that most 21-year old girls are having the time of their life, but you're wrong. I watched my 21st year slide to the half mark before I finished my first glass of Moscato. And there ain't nothing funny 'bout 22.
I scroll through my news feed. Rosie and Lana updated their profile pictures. They embody beauty before picturesque landscapes, their faces smiling and the sun just low enough to dazzle. Their expressions are easy. They appear effortless, naturally gorgeous like male peacocks in the wild. I don't know why I torture myself this way. I shouldn't measure my attractiveness by profile picture likes. This is why I don't go on facebook.
I log out and lie on my bed.
Did I mention I'm a waitress? And that my bed's a mattress on the floor? That my mattress is fortified by a discarded book and clothes enclosure, or that I would rather die than take any man into this 8 by 10 cry for help?
I touch my phone again. It's past one and I have work at 11:30 tomorrow. My deep philosophical thoughts are interrupted by the sound of some idiot drag racing. The tires squeal like slaughtered pigs as he forces his hoopty to withstand his best attempt at drifting. I would give a special fuck you to this ghetto Fast and Furious bitch, but at least he's trying to accomplish something.
I sigh and stare into the black desires of my soul.
Did I mention I'm a writer?
Chapter Two: 12:45 pm
"Hi, I'm Danielle and I'll be taking care of you today. Would you like a sample of our newest white wine? It's light and crisp, one of our best signatures."
A smile stains my grimace. As I bounce around smiling I start to imagine that I run on batteries. I'm at the mercy of Duracell and sooner or later I'm going to need to plug in.
I scratch down their drink order and run towards the back. Two people want tap water.
"Water with lemon," they chirp, as though lemon has the power to mask the taste of abject poverty.
"Coming right up!"
All hail the tangy taste of denial.
I see Jacob standing by the bar, arranging his drinks for what must be at least an eight person table. I try not to stare as I make my own drinks, hoping he won't do that thing where he abruptly invades my personal—
"Sorry sweetheart."
My body freezes when his chest hits my back as he reaches for a fistful of straws.
"No problem," I say calmly.
He's already on his way. Seconds, I couldn't breathe for seconds. My wrist has been killing me from the writing, the typing, the tray carrying. The fear of losing my livelihood to arthritis or tendonitis lay in the back of my mind, right beside thoughts that Jacob would be a nice outlet.
I watch these shows sometimes that show you how to flirt. I don't think I could keep a straight face when all I can think about is that I was thinking about him, specifically last night. I want him for no apparent reason. I don't know if he's in school, or how old he is, or what he wants out of life. I just know he's one hell of a server, and he calls me sweetheart.
As the night gets hectic I see him again around the bend, and he looks at my face.
"Breathe," he chuckles and I force a smile to reassure him that I'm breathing. My eyes are trained on his every detail. I'll forget his faults, his tired eyes and slightly crooked nose. I'll color him rose, make him the prince of this fairytale I've been thinking of where this ghost waitress falls for this server, and tries to kill him out of love. How's that for romantic?
Hey babe, I'm a writer. Wanna die?
The night ends in a whirlwind of crumpled singles and I don't bother counting my tips. I postpone it as long as possible. I wave goodbye to everyone, wonder if he has a girlfriend, and hop into my car. The SRS light has been on for 6 months and the paint on the back fender has been scratched off. It's a 1997 Honda Accord passed down to me from dear old Dad. We both know I need a new one, but I'm in no hurry and that scares him. I'll drive it until she breaks down. Judy, (my car) has refused to start on me several times already, mostly when I'm backing out. I never panic, just turn the ignition off and slide the stick thing into park. I restart the car and back out a little more before she stops. Turn off, park. Turn on, put it in drive and it surges forward fine. I kind of admire Judy for resisting me when I try to force her backward. I wish I had her courage, that'd I'd rather die than go back.
When I get home I get naked at the door and head to the kitchen. Food in the microwave, I stand in my mismatched underthings and count my money.
5…10…20…52…no. Start again. Now 5…10…
I made 82 dollars. I try not to cry as I shove it into the jar and grab my nuked leftovers from work.
I need to make 1800 dollars in four weeks. I'm going to Japan if I have to swim.
Chapter Three: 8:00 pm
I don't like talents. Talent, the singular is something I always wanted.
I'd like to be good at one thing. If I was good at just one thing I would have devoted all of my time towards it. If I was just into music I'd be that 13 year-old in Julliard, getting shown up by some 5 year-old Asian kid. If I was a writing girl I'd probably have a book out.
I'm an arts girl. I live and breathe the arts. So I wrote, acted, painted, drew, played instruments, played sports, did Honors classes, and said I'd be a lawyer. My parents liked the idea. They liked it better than my plan to become a violinist. Law was supposed to be a backup plan. I can't remember how it made its way to the forefront. Was it Leslie, the first chair who I knew I'd never beat? Who had at least 10 years on me, despite us both being 14? Was it my parents in my ear? Orchestra room politics that wouldn't give me the second chair when I deserved it? Jennifer, who said she'd rather die than give up her chair, leading to numerous fantasies of pushing her off a cliff?
Maybe I just didn't want it anymore. Turns out I didn't want law either. My father pretended to be okay with it for a day before he exploded. Our family exploded. I'm rather certain that all of us still have shrapnel somewhere in our bodies, and we don't have the resources or the time to deal with it like Tony Stark.
Still, deciding to be an English major wasn't easy. My mother's a teacher and I've taught all my life via association. I have no desire to teach children. The humanities are a humble disease. My little sister is all about science and math.
"We need more bread for table 30!"
I run to the intercom, salad tongs in my hand.
"Mas pan por favor!"
The Spanish woman frying up rice looks at me with irritation. She can't say she didn't understand me now.
I'm a good student. In college I excel in everything. After I dropped the screw law bomb, my parents moved me back to a local college. It was a state school, one that was supposedly hard to get in to, not that I'd ever know. I was a black girl with a 4.0 GPA. They wouldn't have wanted me more if I was half Chippewa. In one year I was in the Honors Program, studied a semester in a graduate program with 6 other misfits, won a scholarship, and was accepted into a student exchange program. It was two weeks in Fukuoka, Japan. My dream was to go to Tokyo. Fukuoka is closer to Seoul, Korea than Tokyo, but they offered to pay for my accommodations, most of my meals, and entertain me. Choosy beggars starve.
"Mas pan rapidamente!"
The plane ticket was a point of contention. I had just gotten this job and my folks didn't have squat to give me. They had already shelled out study abroad money for me in high school, back when I was their golden girl, back when I was going to give my uncle free-reign to commit crime.
Now, no matter my successes, I couldn't help but feel like a failure. Like I would never be worth anything until I finished college, got a job and supported myself. Maybe I am a loser. There are 18-year olds who live alone.
I grab a bread basket and dump it on my tray beside a cheese grater and purple dishes.
But those little independent fuckers will plateau without an education. One day I'm going to be an (insert).
I drop down the bread and smile, asking if they need anything else and pray that they don't. They stare at me like I've just asked for their hand in marriage.
Oh I can't do this shit for the rest of my life. I'm not prepared to fail. Worst comes to worst I'm prepared to strip.
"Could we get a refill?"
I'll call myself Tasty Delicious.
"Sure! I'll be right back."
I start to panic just thinking about what table 12, 15, and 19 need and Jacob appears out of nowhere.
"What do you need?"
"A refill of coke and sprite, and bread for 15."
"Cool. Make me a salad and I'll drop it off for you."
Salad, sandwich, anything for you baby.
I run into the kitchen. I bet he has a girlfriend. I bet they're long-term. I bet he's just being nice to me.
"Here's your salad."
"Thank you." He grabs his tray and runs off.
At the end of the night I have 71 dollars in tips. I'm starting to think I can't do this, but I have to prove that I can do this one thing on my own. I have to earn my father's love, or I need to escape from it. The burden of his caring, the responsibility of his hopes, blackened with the burden of years of self-doubt and wisdom are too heavy and cruel for my tiny 21-year old heart. I'm going gray. Mother stands idly by, mutely distraught as I am schooled by his Vulcanesque logic. I refuse them both. She can be a bleeding heart, but I am a rising sun.
Chapter Four: Saturday
I knew my first Saturday night had taken more than it had given, as I sat in the McDonalds drive thru scratching my ankle with a credit card. My wrist, which had been making crunchy noises for two hours, suddenly stopped hurting, and I did things with a mechanical efficiency befitting any colorful 80's automaton, with a grin. Clocking in, I caught Jacob looking at me and was too dumbfounded to smile as he ran through to the other side. So he was on shift. It felt like I hadn't seen him in an eternity. Five shifts is an eternity. I had the pleasure of being in the back when he started to lose his temper with the kitchen staff, their gazes vacant as he asked for his chicken alfredo. A cook had just explained to me into complete Spanish that I should keep the bread tin down below when we were out of bread. Part of me wondered if she knew I understood her, or if she was past the point of caring. My clunky high school Spanish did wonders for me now, despite how mediocre it made me feel in the presence of their dissonant runs, dribbling from their mouths like rare exotic spittle.
Keisha was nice to me today. She allowed me to crack and joke and found out I'm actually funny. Still, I don't know why she thought it was hilarious that I defended picking up the cheese for the grater in front of a manager.
"You touched it with your hands."
I imagine I sounded quite wounded. "I wash my hands frequently."
It probably had high wavering notes like, "But sir…I would like some more." Or "We always give to the children sir…"
And I do wash my hand frequently. The only other person who I've seen washing their hands as much as me is Jacob. That's another reason why he's the only guy in this restaurant that I want touching me.
I had my grin firmly attached as the district manager buzzed in and out without so much as acknowledging my existence. I took it as a compliment. I'm pretty sure he only said hi to people fucking up.
"Hey Liz, can you do me a favor? Make me three minestrone soups and bring it to table nine? Thanks a bunch."
You never waited for a response. No one said no. We needed one another to say yes. A no could start a nasty chain of revenge driven events. She wasn't "making" the soup so much as scooping it into a bowl but you get the idea. As I rolled up bread and ran past, Jacob shouted to me.
"Slow down."
Fuck you.
The stress of the night was starting to get to me, and I started to despise the fact that he was here. How dare he tell me to slow down? Why the fuck would I slow down? So I could be even more behind? So my ten dollar tip could gradually decline until I was left with a crumbled up note that said "IOU" and was signed "nothing?"
I fumed underneath my sparky veneer as other servers openly bitched to me.
"I'm not actually happy," I admitted. "I staple the corners of my mouth up before every shift."
"But I saw you laughing."
"I laugh when I'm nervous. I can feel myself cracking on the inside."
I laughed and they laughed as I ran away to table 9.
I wonder if they knew I was serious.
"Here you are. Would you like any refills? More bread?"
The shake their heads, mouths full of soup. All according to plan.
"Okay great. Lemme know if you need anything."
As I run back I try to catch a glimpse of Jacob, whom I now hate and see he's as stressed as I am. I start to see an invisible vein pulsing on his beautiful forehead. I'm too busy to do anything about it, not that I could. Some of the rage leaves me. Maybe he was just trying to help. As the night winds down I see him again, this time by the bar. He's talking to Hannah, a bartender who seems drunk even when she's sober. I like her because she kept me company and made me an iced coffee when I got stuck working the bar on a Thursday at lunch. She's blonde and possibly pretty. You can never tell in these unisex clothes they stuff us in. I bet management planned that.
He leans in to talk to her and I start to wonder if they're together because he's smiling and he's doing that high arm thing that guys do when they're being suave. I can't see her react and I run off with napkins before I can.
I am jealous.
Maybe he's just a big flirt, maybe there can be nothing between us. Between us? Girl are you insane? You of all people should know you don't date your coworkers. How many pieces have you picked up of your scatterbrained friends? When they had to change living arrangements because they shacked up with their roommate? When they quit jobs because rumors got around? You need this job and he's a better server than you. If they have to choose, you don't have a snowball's chance in hell.
God I hate you Jacob.
I booked my flight today, using my mother's credit card. I have a piggy bank that my parents bought me when I was 6 that I'm stuffing with money to pay her back. When I was 11 one of my family members emptied it out. My parents and I had saved over 200 dollars in it. They think it was a kid because they left me with some of the singles and all the coins.
Change, I had a pig full of change.
Now he was bursting with dollar bills.
"With all these singles I'm starting to wonder if I'm a waitress or a stripper," I mumbled under my breath.
I stare at the dessert in my hand and realize it needs a doily. Where the hell…
Looking around for help I see…Jacob.
F, my life.
He whips around, light brown hair hitting the arch of his neck.
"Where do we keep the doilies?"
"Over there babe."
A little version of me does a weird shivery dance.
"Sweet, thanks."
"Also, I think you're dropping your dessert."
He runs off and I look to it. He must have not seen the fact that I kept it in the case. Foolish boy, Dan is a girl who can hold it down.
I sigh. Oh Jacob, why do I need you?
The night winds down and I begin to feel aches in my feet which concerns me. These are the most comfortable shoes I've ever owned. I look forward to counting my tips at home, expecting to be 100 dollars closer to earning my Fukuoka trip.
Keisha sidles beside me sighing. "I am so fucking done with this job," she grumbles. "I just want to go home."
I concur.
"Girl I feel you."
Part of me is putting on some extra black because Keisha has an urban accent. Then again, with my multicultural background, and the way that fatigue brings it out, God knows what I sound like. My dad is Guyanese, my mother is a Long Islander who was partially raised in the South, I live on the nicest street of what was once a ghetto, and I'm an educated college student.
I sound like a drive-by.
Hannah sidles up, taking an out of bar stroll. She gives us a lopsided grin and glides off.
"A lot of people who do this job drink," Keisha says, tossing a menu to my left.
"Yeah, I can see why."
Keisha finishes her last table and I'm running on adrenaline and the little chocolates we're supposed to give to the guests. I hear Hannah telling some kind of story that induces giggling and I want to throw her over the bar. She catches eyes with me.
"Love you Dani."
You cannot fathom the amount of fucks I don't give.
"Aw, love you too!"
Sigh…girls are terrible creatures.
Soon I'm at home, freshly showered and praying I don't have an early shift. I check.
I have an early shift. Well, money is money.
I count my tips once. Then I count them again. Then I check my purse, my book, my apron.
Not a stray dollar, not a hidden twenty or a crumpled five anywhere. I made 96 dollars. All the hype about the miracles of Saturdays and I make the same as any Sunday or Friday night. I could make the same on a Wednesday lunch if I bend over and walk slow enough for those male bonding lunch dates. There's something about food and testosterone that makes men want to out tip each other.
"Give her a 10."
"No twenty. I'll give you a ten."
"No, no I got it."
Some people are easy to push, but times are hard. I don't even know why I dare to complain. My entire life is in need of repair and I decide the best thing to do is run off to a country where I half speak the language. A semester of intense Japanese was forgotten the first week I got to sleep past 12pm. I'll need to remember it.
I remember stupid things, like watching Jacob cashing out, standing impatiently behind Liz, an inch from intimacy with yet another woman. I remember the stupid freckles on his face, how unique he is for what he is, how I've never seen anything like him. I pretend I'm too coarse to be smitten. We're always running past each other so we never talk. One day I'll massage his shoulders. I don't know if I'd ever be that bold, but I massaged some of the coworkers who were bitching and they liked it.
I stare at the stack of singles. Never have I felt such resentment towards George Washington.
No matter how hard I pushed them, people don't tip like they used to.
Chapter five: 3 weeks
Somewhere down the line this story stopped being fiction. Though the names were changed and the situations satirized, they became fact, and the more real they become, the more I feel like a character in a story. Jacob was like a monster. It didn't take much for him to surface, swimming in the corners of my mind like a Jaw reject, or the Predator. No, not like, he was the predator monster. Same built arms, same dreads, and though much shorter, he had the same animal magnetism.
I couldn't take it anymore. I confronted Eloise and prayed he had a girlfriend.
Dragging her in the farther corner possible, I ignored the chatters of Spanish and suspicious looks as I word vomited.
"Listen, I'm only telling you this because I trust you. I mean, I'm asking you. I-I um…does Jacob have a girlfriend?"
I had pulled her to the corner like I was admitting that I was pregnant with her baby, and I watched her give birth to a sigh of palpable relief.
"Oh is that it? No, I don't think he does."
"He's a really nice guy. You'll see how he does everyone's side work."
"Uh huh."
"I think you should go talk to him. I mean, if you want."
I thank her and walk back into the fray. I see him bent over a stupid computer, and I wonder why the hell I find this stupid boy so attractive. He's just a stupid boy. There are tons of stars more attractive. And he smokes and I deplore that. He looks up at me and smiles.
Ah. That's why.
"So…you working a lot next week?" I ask casually. It's a Sunday.
"You'll be seeing a lot of me for the next three weeks," he hums. "Then never again."
"What? Why?"
"I'm going back to Florida."
I'm stunned. I'm emotionally ravaged. I'm quit before I began, stopped before I'm started, stabbed before I breathe my first breath. Before I could even think to get ahead. In the seconds in between our dialogue I think of how I had planned to court him. How I'd find him on facebook platonically and become friends. I'd get his number and we'd become closer friends, and I'd lie in wait to make my attraction known. Then we'd go on a date, and then three, and then we'd be hand in hand watching some TV show on a shitty couch in the dark because we were past the point of impressing one another. We'd be together. And I'd lie on his shoulder and fall asleep. My foolproof one year plan has been flashcooked to three weeks. I started having Eric (the last day of the semester confessor) flashbacks and my basest instincts set in.
"So you're from Florida huh?"
"Yeah. I was just here during break."
"Well, now that you've said that…"
I snatch a coupon beside him and scribble down my number. I pass it to him with military snap.
"Here. We should hang out before you go."
I avoided his eyes and most of his face in general so I don't know how he took the news, but he said, "Yeah, totally. Sounds good."
"Okay. Cool. Bye."
I run away before I can…I don't know. Before anything can.
I see him out of the corner of my eye and pointedly ignore him, pretending to be deeply involved in closing my drawer.
Bitch I already said goodbye to you. Be gone.
I leave, celebrating my boldness in the car. Stare at my phone. No messages. It's 4:00pm. He just started work. This is okay. I take a deep breath. I made good money today. I have hope.
That night he doesn't text me, or call me, or send up a smoke signal or a flare.
I made good money today.
The next day I have work and I pray he's not in.
He's not. I wonder if he can sense that my desire for him wavers like a yoyo. What am I afraid of?
I don't know. Then I do.
I am afraid of the three days that pass without a word.
Chapter six: Wednesday, Dinner Shift
I'm wearing glasses. Jacob has never seen me in glasses but today I woke up, said screw you world, and put them on. I balance it out with a perfect complexion, half mine, half a bottles'. The Wednesday lunch shift is busier than I expect, and I'm a lot calmer. I read a book called "He's Just Not That into you." I've consulted friends male and female. The guy tells me not to worry, but what does he know? His girlfriend tricked him into a relationship and I have not the experience nor tolerance for the hunt. I've come to terms. Jacob does not like me that much, if at all. Or he would have communicated in some insignificant way. Not a long winding convo, not a memoir written based on meeting me. Just a "Hi, its Jacob," to store the bastard into my phone. I hate technology sometimes.
But it's alright. I am fortunate to have lots of eye candy at my job, and I will flirt with the jail bait busser Bobby, knowing that I would never in a million years go for a younger guy. I've been down that messy, messy path.
"When do you work?"
"Eh, I don't have anything til Sunday," I sigh. "I'll have to sabotage some other servers. Just start coughing in their direction."
I demonstrate. "Oh sorry, how are you feeling? Need to call in sick?"
He laughs, amused by my silliness. I like him, he's easy to be around and nice to look at. And to me, he's as viable as option as a Mickey Mouse lamp. Gotta love Bobby.
Keenan and I swap stories about getting hit on by old people. I got the "Did it hurt" today from a man with his wife. He seemed irritated I didn't let him finish his joke and explained to me how it was supposed to work.
"I'm supposed to say, "Did it hurt?" Then you're supposed to say, "What hurt?" and I'm supposed to say, "When you fell from heaven."
I smile and fake a laugh, looking at the wife who seems devoid of a reaction, like after 30 plus years of marriage, his antics just bounce off her like bullets on Superman's chest.
"Well thank you for the compliment sir."
He frowns, obviously not receiving the reaction he had hoped. My tip reflects his disappointment.
"Five lousy dollars." I'd hope that the old bat trips on his cane, but at his age it might mean wishing for him to die. I can't muster up that much anger and I just shake my head.
"Oh well, could be wor—"
I see him out of the corner of my eye. He's here. Jacob is here.
I don't know how in my rational mind I somehow believed I could avoid him for his remaining three weeks, but I thought I could. I didn't look in his direction, too busy to do so anyway. I looked like a girl on a mission. Besides, I was so over him.
Twenty minutes later I saw him in the kitchen and about faced. My tables desperately needed napkins. After doling out napkins and drinks, I peered and saw him exiting. Perfect.
I ran inside the kitchen to get what I needed.
I'm back out in a flash. Just one more table and I'm done with my shift. I can sneak out before he even sees me. Concentrated, I run back into the Jacobless kitchen and prepare a bread basket. When I am done I turn and he's right fucking there, and from the looks of it, waiting for me.
"Hey Danielle!"
"Hey!" I parrot with frightened enthusiasm. If I was a cat I'd be on the ceiling.
Suddenly I'm enveloped in a hug I know nothing to do with. It is not quick, it is long, borderline intimate. It lingers. Then it is done. His mouth moves and I respond but I don't know to what he's saying. Words, faintly sure of that. I smile and walk out with my bread, inches from throwing myself to the floor.
What…was that?
With the bread secure I run to the backroom and push my head against a crate.
Why is God punishing me? Or is he rewarding me? Am I being a yoyo? Does he sense that and it confuses him? Makes him pull away? Makes him want to reassure me with long lingering hugs?
Then why didn't he call?
My eyes narrow. What if the hug is some kind of power play made to assuage his guilt, to smooth down any wrinkled feathers, to put me right where he wants me. What if he's a player? I try to imagine Jacob playing me and I can't see it.
He's such a player.
Renewed with positive "I can do bad all by myself" energy, I run back with cone cups that I called triangle cups and watched as a group of girl coworkers looked at me like I was a baby chick.
"…Triangle cups?" My eyes widen.
"Oh, she means cone cups!"
Oh says the chorus. They give me super detailed instructions and I try not to be offended. I might be two years younger than you silly girls.
As I load the cups Jacob stops by the door.
"Need any help?"
"No, I got it."
Independent woman.
As I slide them in he puts his hand underneath and I stare at it as he pushes up the cones.
"The first time I put them in, they slid right out the bottom and went everywhere."
I laugh. "Thanks."
He walks on and I wish I knew what to say.
Oh…I can't stay mad at you Jacob. Why didn't you call?
"Did you ever think that maybe he's just busy?"
The Independent woman sits on my left. "Too busy to talk to you?"
Ouch. That sucks.
I pull Eloise to the side. "He probably doesn't even get that you like him. He probably thinks hang out like a friend. Boys can be dull like that. I mean I have his number for work and he never answers."
"You have his number?"
"For work purposes."
Maybe I sounded territorial. Eloise has a boyfriend and she's moving in a month. I'm going to miss her too.
I sigh. "This is hopeless."
"No it's not. Talk to him."
I don't know when she became my mentor.
My head is itchy. I walk back into the kitchen and he's talking to this older woman who won't stop talking. I give up and walk outside to drink from the lemonade tap that hisses at me like a dragon.
When I reenter he suddenly asks, "Where are you from Dani? Originally."
I reply. "Here."
"Born and raised?"
"Oh. That sucks."
I raise an eyebrow. "Why? The city's right around the corner and I have plenty of family there."
Who cut people for talking smack about New York.
He tells me some reason I can't recall and I watch him drop a basket of bread. He scoops it up quickly as he rambles. Somehow that endears him to me. He says something about New York being more diverse, but I'm too involved wondering if I made him drop that bread.
Hm. Fulfilling any naughty librarian fantasies?
When I speak again I not only stutter, I unconsciously divulge that I…may have been gathering Intel.
On him.
"You're from T-tampa right? That's like…um, the New York of Florida right?"
He gives me a funny look. "Yeah, but Miami is more like the New York of Florida."
I'm about to say that I thought Miami was in California but I stop myself at the last minute. I'm supposed to be the smart one.
That pow wow ends awkwardly. I sigh, my mind racing. I close out, my tables gone and say into the air.
"Okay, I'm leaving."
He doesn't respond and I don't want to declare it again like I needed to be wished off like a pretentious princess.
"Kay…bye," I say in a soft voice. Someone hears me and says goodbye. I run away again. I think I clocked out…no, I did.
I clock out, and I walk into my car, ever so confused.
Maybe it does suck to live in New York. It's not the nicest place in the world. Would I move for him? Though my dream is to live in the city? Do black people even live in Tampa?
I rub my head, let my hair down, listen to The Postal Code start in the middle of "Natural Anthem."
It's not like I love him or anything.
My eyes widen. Could I?
Not a snowball's chance in hell, says practical Dan. It's been like three weeks.
What about love at first sight? Says impractical Dan. Weirder shit has happened.
Isn't it supposed to be mutual? I ask impractical Dan.
She shrugs her shoulders. "Want to grab a pint?"
"Since when are you British?"
I'm snapped back to reality by my mother arguing over using her towel. She's been in a terrible mood all evening. I wonder if they realize that all the things I borrow, all the things I do that annoy them, one day they're going to stop.
I'll be moving out soon enough.
Maybe, to Tampa.
I friend him on facebook. I don't know what it means. I had to do something. If he doesn't friend me, then that's that.
I wonder if I could make him love me. If I want him to love me. I wonder if I'm difficult to love.
I wonder if I'm in love.
I check to see if he's accepted it. Not yet. But Jenny gives up her lunch for tomorrow, and I suddenly have a shift.
I hope he's not there.
I look back. She says Britt already took it.
Chapter 7: An hour later
He accepted my friend request.
I felt myself cackling on the inside.
Oh foolish foolish Jacob, you know not what you do…
After doing extensive research through his about page, his timeline, photos, friends, and relatives I came to one definite conclusion.
Jacob is a moron. I saw girls flirting with him openly and he had absolutely no reaction.
"Is it hot in here?" said girl 1 when he had a picture of his plain ridiculous abs.
Genius responds: "I was sparring for an hour. It got hot!"
She then explains she meant attractive, and he's like "Ohh…"
So I guess giving him my number meant nothing. I'm not a forward person so I don't know what to do now.
I guess I could say:
Hey, let's go to this place.
I walk into my room and sigh. Hm…that's not an awful idea. Not an awful idea at all.
Chapter 8: A text with Lynn
Danielle: "He hugged me today and he was so warm….and he has tattoos…i don't stand a snowball's chance.
And he rides motorcycles and smokes. I went to Christian school. All that repression manifested into a person."
Lynn: "Omg and his name is Jacob.
I'm so sorry."
Danielle: So am I.
Chapter 9: Skipped stories
I didn't think I had the courage to write more. My feelings grew inside me like a maelstrom, and I did everything to keep the storm from swallowing him, to keep him safe from me and I let it ravage me, desecrate me, destroy me, out of love. Because that's what it is at its core. But this is not a fairytale and I am not a Princess. And Jacob, bless him, is not a Prince.
It makes me laugh. Did you know you would have to tell me to breathe in your presence? Like, did you know you would take my breath away?
I am a fool. I still want to kiss you, despite the fact that in four days I might never see you again. I still want you. I have this nagging feeling that you want me too, but you've pulled away because you're doing what's best for the long term. That's a rosy outlook I like best. Delusions or not, you're going back to Florida.
As I sit beside Eloise as she does my nails with her homemade gel manicure set, I can smell our hair smoky from the fire I made to roast us smores. She tells me what she thinks.
"He's either subconsciously backing away, or doing it purposefully. He's acting distant to protect himself because he likes you too."
Is it wrong I am both appalled and warmed by this?
"Well then…that's a thing."
"Yeah! I mean…he's a nice guy, but there will be others you know. Better guys. You're attractive and smart and funny. You'll find someone. Honestly, you could do better."
I stare at her and ponder how I'll be losing her too in her move to Texas, but I'm not sad. I think she's the type of person to stay in touch, and I treasure this moment with her. As my hands glide over the surface of the table I wonder how Jacob and I could have coexisted without touching each other.
I wonder what would have happened if I had arrived at this restaurant 4 months ago.
I wonder, and the wonder turns to waste. Wasted effort, wasted time, garbage. And I kiss him, in my mind, and the outcome is no different. And I close my eyes and use my telepathy to beam images of kissing me into his head, and know he's hard-headed.
I look at my clock. 11:16 PM. I have things to do tomorrow.
In some ways, Jacob was a good thing. He ruined me for guys below his caliber. He showed me how important reliability is to me. He showed me how warm a hug can be.
And he broke my heart, but broke it gently, and told me if he could make it, so could I.
Is that what he meant when he told me that?
"If I can make it, so you can you. You're smart. You'll be fine."
He smiles at me, the sun in his brown hair. I can barely look at him.
"You're welcome."
Our conversation has nothing to do with love. And I wonder what it takes to break Jacob Ronson's heart.
Chapter 10: Fukuoka
The tarmac is paved with dashed worries. That's why the plane can fly. People are lightest when they leave home.
I just made that up. Sounds romantic right? I can't feel my dreams coming true until I'm in the plane. Until I'm in the airport and I'm trying to get my baggage claim from a woman who knows I'm speaking English, but can't help me. Am I wearing sunglasses? Am I in that stylish outfit I planned those days ago? No. Just a pair of jeans, a band tee-shirt and a denim blouse. A school hoodie on my waist, and my prescription glasses.
I decided to not write about my time in Fukuoka. That would take away from the beauty of this once in a lifetime experience. Ten years from now I don't want to remember my first trip to Japan as a trip I used to get over a love I lost that blazed out of control. I don't want to nurture old flames. I don't want to view this as a new beginning. I am not the phoenix this day. I will not start over because it's easier to die and wipe the slate clean, than bear the burden of flightless wings. It's okay. I will learn to fly again on that tarmac of dashed worries.
I hope I raise the money. My parents lent it and I'm working myself to the bone to pay it back. My computer dies and I lose 175. Their birthdays come four days apart and that's 50 each. Payless has a shoe sale and that's 30. Mother's Day and Father's Day and I am curse the month of June. But my fingers tremble as I stare at the clothes in piles that I have yet to pack, and I know the moment comes soon and I stifle the desire to buy more jewelry.
When I close my eyes I can smell the sea breeze from a different land. My feet feast on foam, and the umi laps at my feet. Watashi no namae wa Danielle desu. But, you already knew that.
There's laughter in the distance, so close but far away. I am lonely, but I am more whole than I have ever been. No, not lonely. Just whole, whole and free.
There's no romance in reality. Often, I feel like I've been writing out my story with a red pen because it feels all wrong, but that's just the devil talking. I open my eyes, my lashes fighting against the lies that I wasn't good enough or pretty enough for him or that there was something I could have done or I'll never get over him. I open my heart and I know what it took to get me here. And I don't owe any of that to Jacob.
I feel the triumph of doing this impossible task on my own, and I feel humbled by love given even when there was nothing to receive. The sun doesn't set quite yet, it lies upon the water like it's waiting for me to say goodbye. And in Fukuoka I am nothing but a brilliant soul, baptized by a city of brilliant souls. I don't say fuck my life, and I don't look away. I stare.
I can't help but stare.


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You heard it here first. We're moving back to New Jersey. Beth's getting a new job, but since there hasn't been a bona fide offer, I won't say anything just yet. I'm keeping my job with Google, I'll just change where I do what I do. Also, we're keeping the dog.
If Beth's job is settled as we expect, she will leave Los Angeles a couple of weeks before me. I will drive with the dog across the country. Whereas last time I drove cross-country over twelve days, this time I don't plan to stop for a couple of days in each city, since I'm currently employed and also because Maggie is not much of a sightseer.
We're still working out dates, but rest assured, by Halloween, we'll be gone.

subset: commoncrawl


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11 May 2016. Kigali, Rwanda. A new initiative was launched amidst efforts to address challenges of post harvest losses for potatoes and other perishables currently accounting for 40 percent on the continent.
The initiative, one million tons of cold storage will see African farmers reduce on wasted resources while increasing returns on investment as result of proper storage facilities for the perishables.
"The initiative will allow farmers to decide on when they need to put their produce on the market and have a greater negotiating power for greater incomes," said Dr Agnes Kalibata, President of Alliance for Green Revolution in Africa (AGRA).
The launch happened on the sidelines of the World economic Forum on Africa –WEF Africa 2016 going on from May 11-13 in Kigali which has brought together over 1,200 business, political, policy making and other leaders to discuss current economic and social issues, problems, ideas and possible solutions.
The initiative which is expected Public Private Partnership between AGRA and UPL from India and governments of three countries is expected to mobilize U$ 2 Billion in the next decade to create integrated value chains and set up one million tons of cold storage facilities across Sub-Saharan Africa.
Currently, work for the construction of three cold storage projects in progress in Rwanda, Kenya and Uganda and is expected to be fully operational by 2017.
L'Agra lance un projet de 2 milliards de $ pour améliorer les chaînes du froid en Afrique
Source: PAEPARD FEED


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FYF Fest Lineup :: September 1st & 2nd
Organizers of the Fuck Yeah Festival and Goldenvoice announced today the official lineup for the 2012 FYF Fest, which will take place in Los Angeles State Historic Park on September 1st and 2nd.
Some of the acts scheduled to appear include FIDLAR, Warpaint, Father John Misty, The Growlers, Cloud Nothings, White Fence, The Allah-Las, Wild Noting, Health, King Khan & The Shrines, Dinosaur Jr, Black Mountain, The Soft Pack, Atlas Sound, and many others.
Weekend passes start at $77 and will go on sale Friday via Ticketfly. The festival is all-ages and will run from noon until midnight daily.
Jenny Lee Lindberg of Warpaint – FYF Fest 2010
Black Mountain – Druganaut
Cloud Nothings – Didn't You
Father John Misty – Writing a Novel
The Soft Pack – Bright Side
King Khan & The Shrines – Bite My Tongue
Warpaint – Billie Holiday
White Fence – Makers
Wild Nothing – Nowhere


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NOTICE: Many events listed here have been canceled or postponed due to the Covid-19 emergency. It is best to call ahead or check with organizer's websites to verify the status of any local event.
|Other Tour Dates (1)
|Sep 25
|Duke Tumatoe & The Power Trio
|Downstairs at Joy Manor Westland, Michigan
You may know him from his regular gig on the nationally syndicated "Bob and Tom" radio program. You may remember him as the leader of the All-Star Frogs (1970-1983) and the Power Trio (1983-present), doing humorous and raunchy blues originals such as "Tie You Up!" and "More Love, More Money". You also may remember the Tumatoe tours of local clubs and endless spins of his songs on college radio in the '70s and '80s. You may not know that he recorded for Warner Brothers Records (I Like My Job, produced by John Fogerty of Creedence Clearwater Revival fame), was a member of REO Speedwagon and he grew up on the South Side of Chicago, a blues-loving youth who hung with the legends...
..Now he's still at it, playing over 200 shows and covering over 60,000 miles annually. And he's reunited with his old pals at Blind Pig Records, celebrating the release of "You've Got the Problem! As always, the Power Trio's instrumental prowess is the perfect backdrop for Duke's outrageous humor. The title track tells the story of a poor, misunderstood fellow's struggles with his partner ("I don't drink too much, baby - You don't drink enough!"). From there, Duke delivers nonstop musical mayhem that truly evokes the excitement of his legendary live performances. Highlights include the title track, the whimsical "My Baby Is a Nudist", the unhappy tale of a man whos attached to a Real Mean Woman, which also features some blistering slide guitar and the hangover-inspired "Moanin' After Blues" (includes actual moaning). ..
..After Duke left REO Speedwagon in 1969, he formed Duke Tumatoe & the All-Star Frogs. For the next 13 years, they toured relentlessly playing throughout the Midwest on countless college campuses and bars. Because of this grueling tour schedule, the band managed to release only three albums, Red Pepper Hot (1976), Naughty Child (1980) and Back to Chicago (1982). In 1983, Tumatoe decided to slow down the pace and break up the Frogs. He immediately rebounded with the creation of the Power Trio and recorded Duke's Up (1984). Over the next several years, Tumatoe released four discs on his own Sweetfinger Music label, Dr. Duke (1992), Wild Animals (1994), Greatest Hits Plus (1996), and the all-instrumental Picks & Sticks (1997). Throughout his illustrious career, Tumatoe opened for several legendary figures in blues and rock including Muddy Waters, Buddy Guy, B.B. King, George Thorogood, Fabulous Thunderbirds, Doobie Brothers and John Fogerty. Fogerty was so taken with Tumatoe's performance, he produced the critically acclaimed 1988 live album I Like My Job on Warner Bros. In 1999, Tumatoe signed with J-Bird Records where he released A Ejukatid Man that same year. In 2001, Tumatoe had tongue firmly in cheek with the releases Pompous & Overrated and the raunchy seasonal disc It's Christmas (Let's Have Sex)...
..Tumatoe promises "A good time, a little mischief, and a lot of great music." And yet Dukes fans know he's not all about the joke. "There's a great deal of musical ability in the band," Tumatoe said. They focus on the music, "just as much as on the twists in the lyrical content." Tumatoe learned drums at 10, moved to guitar as a teen, and became active playing in the Chicago area in the '60s. He grew up on the South Side, in the exact time and space of the golden era of electric blues. He knew, and played with the greats, and now can't believe that he took that for granted as a kid. "Those guys were kinda like available, just as a natural course of daily activity. ... You never thought it was such an earth-shaking experience to have grown up in the crux of all that but it really, really was." Tumatoe knew all the "old guys," he said, ran into them every day. "Played with a lot of them," Tumatoe said. "Muddy (Waters), Willie Dixon, Bo Diddley, Buddy Guy and J.B. Hutto to name a few. Having grown up in that city, you just experienced that stuff."..
..Duke's fans consider him one of music's best-kept secrets and they selfishly admit they want to keep it that way. They know his show will be one of those sweaty, anything can happen things and they look forward to the freely dispensed and practical advice from the Doctor ("When you're in a basement you should drink whiskey"). And when the show's over, the next best thing is a dose of You've Got the Problem!..
..(Includes adapted material by Mark Wedel, The Kalamazoo Gazette; Jamie Cook, State News MS&U; and Al Campbell, All Music Guide)..
..GHS Strings..
All video content is provided by Youtube, and any questions, comments, or concerns regarding such content should be directed to Youtube


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Coastal Carolina University graduates Class of 2012
U.S. Rep James E. Clyburn gave the commencement address and received the honorary degree, Doctor of Public Service.
�I ran for elective office three times and lost,� Clyburn said in his address. �People tried to tell me three strikes and you�re out, but life isn�t played by baseball rules. When you leave this campus, you may not always succeed on the first try. But I hope, as residents of South Carolina, that you will adopt our state�s motto �While I breathe, I hope,� and never give up.�
Graduating students were recognized for outstanding academic achievement and community service.
Kimberly Ann Shaw of Green Sea received the President's Award for Academic Achievement, the University's highest academic honor. She earned a bachelor's degree in accounting with a 4.0 grade point average.
Sarah C. Sexton of Waynesboro, Va., received the 2012 Faculty Distinguished Student Excellence Award, an annual award honoring a student who has achieved both a high academic average and a record of campus/community involvement. Sexton, a double major in marine science and mathematics, was a member of the honors program and served as a tutor, lab assistant and research assistant.
Two retiring Coastal Carolina University professors were recognized for their service: Stephen J. Sheel, distinguished professor emeritus of computer science, and Susan J. Slavik, emeritus professor of art.


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Beautiful Kitchen Accessories Ideas
Kitchen accessories – The kitchen accessories are much more important in decor than you can imagine. These help us to keep it tidy, to optimize our hours in the kitchen, to distribute small elements of this space, etc. Therefore it is important to have look at the most useful kitchen accessories and make a review of those that can not miss in our home. One of the most practical, popular and economical kitchen accessories is glass jars. They serve to organize them food and help us decorate with them.
All have at home different types of pasta, sugar, salt, flour, breadcrumbs, etc. All of these items can save in this type of glass jars and make them part of the decor or simply organize cabinet's kitchen perfectly thanks to them. Shelves and hooks are great accessories to decorate the walls of the kitchen while you gain in practicality. In them you can place for example bottles which we spoke earlier, spice jars, cups your most beautiful kitchen accessories, etc.
12 Photos Gallery of: Beautiful Kitchen Accessories Ideas
Besides these elements are decorating the kitchen accessories with a culinary flair, we have them handy for future use, thereby optimizing the time. Just do not overdo placing decorative shelves and hooks because too many do not decorate, but would overwhelmed and the smaller kitchen.Tags :beautiful kitchen accessories, u shape commercial bar


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Title says it all RW/RD/G/LD/LW looking for a club. Msg me on here, psn or on skype (hockeyman_16king)
Thank you for using the VGHL Forums
For NEW PLAYERS interested in joining the VGHL, please make sure that your FORUM NAME matches your PSN name then go to PLAYER REGISTRATION thread and follow the instructions there to join.
Please login to access our forum


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Give Therapy a listen - it's a new offering from Doughboyz Cashout. It was dropped on Sunday, November 13th, 2011. Doughboyz Cashout's musical situation is improving with every new release, and Therapy will most definitely help the cause. It's a fine addition to the growing body of work Doughboyz Cashout has been developing since stepping foot in the game. We're looking forward to what Doughboyz Cashout has in store.
Check out Doughboyz Cashout on Mob Life (Remix), featuring Young Jeezy. Check out Doughboyz Cashout's profile page for the most recent info, news, songs, and mixtapes.
Can you dig it?


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Reactive Attachment Disorder in Children
When children are unable to form normal attachments to parents or guardians, they develop Reactive Attachment Disorder. If your child fails to form an attachment, it is a symptom that cannot be ignored. Such a problem needs serious consideration, and it needs to be resolved during early childhood, or else it could lead to conflicts later in life. This disorder can severely affect how the child deals with other people when he grows up.
It is important to understand that normal parenting and parenting a child with Reactive Attachment Disorder are very different. When this disorder is not properly managed, it can impair the growth of the child as well as his ability to express himself emotionally and to form relationships. Children with RAD typically have very low level of emotional intelligence (EQ).
Understanding children with RAD or Reactive Attachment Disorder, helps us learn more about the human brain. It is known for a fact that 80% of the development of the brain occurs in the first three years of life.… Read the rest


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Enhance Your Professional Skills
Our interactive, engaging, and up-to-date courses for professionals ensure healthcare professionals have the skills needed to provide great patient care. All of our courses offer Continuing Education Hours and some offer BRN, BBS, and CME hours. Choose from instructor-led or self-paced courses. Nurses, social workers, chaplains and other healthcare professionals can get the discipline specific skills they need in palliative care through a wide range of courses.
Click HERE to Learn More About How to Enhance Your Professional Skills
Plan, Build, and Grow Your Palliative Program
For patients and your organization to get the full benefits of palliative care, EVERYONE needs to understand what it is, how and when to refer, and how to integrate its fundamentals into the practice. Check out the "What Every…" series for a top to bottom overview of generalist (primary) palliative care. Additionally, check out our new Building a Community-Based Palliative Care Program series. This is a ten-step approach to either launch or refresh your palliative care program.
Click HERE to Learn More About how to Plan, Build, and Grow Your Program
Discover Helpful Community Resources
Here you'll find online courses for patients and family members as well as community events. Find a CSU Campus Partner near you to see what's going on locally. Learn more about palliative care and how to ask for it at your healthcare provider. Palliative care helps to reduce the stress often associated with long-term or serious illness. Find local and national resources for patients and caregivers.
Click HERE to Learn More About What's Happening in Your Community


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{Sun} SweetsCardsClub ScrapCuttlebugDesign TeamDie CutGlitter Brush PenHeat EmbossingOrchardRubber StampingVintage Botany
{Sun} Sweets: Vintage Botany Card
Happy Sunday, Kraftie Friends!
I have a card to share today...
I die cut a red panel using a Sizzix die and stamped "text" (Club Scrap Orchard Art Nouveau unmounted stamps) in black.
I stamped flowers (Club Scrap Vintage Botany Jumbo unmounted stamps) on black cardstock and heat embossed it in white. I die cut the panel using ODBD Stitched Rectangles die.
I colored the flowers and leaves with Glitter Brush Pens (Spectrum Noir) and added some red enamel dots.
3 comments
So striking and beautiful, Lilian!! Love it! Thanks so much for playing Simon Says Stamp Wednesday "Stamp It" Challenge! Beautiful colors and design. Well done!ReplyDelete
Lovely project and very elegant. Pretty image and color palette. Thank you for stamping with Simon Says Stamp Monday Challenge!ReplyDelete
Love the white flowers on black! So happy you joined us at CTD!ReplyDelete


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What About Iraq? NYT Pollsters Skip Long-Standing Question
The story accompanying Thursday's release of the latest New York Times/CBS News poll was buried on page 14, perhaps becausethere's no real news:Obama led McCain by 3, 45%-42%, just within the margin of error, which is in line with other recent polling showing a tightening race.
More revealing was the poll's treatment of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan: It contained not a single question about Iraq (the war was cited briefly, when respondents were asked to list favored priorities for their preferred candidate).
Instead, the Times asks about Afghanistan, where things are becoming more unstable.
Question 72: What is your impression of how the war in Afghanistan is going for the United States right now - very well, somewhat well, somewhat badly, or very badly?
The Times last asked that question in March 2003 - over five years ago, just as the war in Iraq was beginning. Now that Afghanistan is becoming more unstable, the question reappears. Again, there were no direct questions about Iraq this time.
In contrast, the Times' last poll, released July 16, asked three direct questions about Iraq:
Question 43: If John McCain were elected President, do you think he would generally continue George W. Bush's policies in Iraq, or not?
Question 73: Looking back, do you think the United States did the right thing in taking military action against Iraq, or should the U.S. have stayed out?
Question 74: How would you say things are going for the U.S. in its efforts to bring stability and order to Iraq? Would you say things are going very well, somewhat well, somewhat badly, or very badly?
The responses to Question 74 showed that by July 16,the gap between those who think the Iraq war is going very badly or somewhat badly (51%) and those who think its going very well or somewhat well (45%) had shrunk to six percentage points. That was the smallest gap since December 2005 (18 polls ago), which was two months before the terrorist explosion at a shrine in Samarra touched off Sunni-Shiite killings. By contrast, a May 2007 poll showed a gap of 53 percentage points. To summarize:Just asthe Iraq questionhas lostits political potency, the Times switches its polling to Afghanistan. Is it because Afghanistan is now a more reliable source for bad news?


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Friendly Flowers Stamp Set
Price: $24.00
Product ID : 2846
Friendly Flowers Tip Sheet :
1. There are 4 large flower images that coordinate with the Friendly Flower die.
2. The smaller images and leaves coordinate with the Friendly Flower Extras dies.
3. You can mix and match many of the images in this set. The dotted petals image and
the lines image can be used together or on top of the large solid flower or the large
coordinating flower for additional color layering.
4. For more fun color layering, stamp the smallest leaves on top of the large solid leaves.
5. For an interesting twist, stamp the large flower with the circle center, and then die cut
the scalloped circle center from the flower. Stamp the circle center image on a layer
behind the large die-cut flower, popping the flower up with foam adhesive. Reverse this
look by die cutting the scalloped circle center and popping it up on the flower with foam
6. Several of the smaller flowers and decorative images can be stamped in the center of
the large solid flower to create a variety of flowers!
7. Using the coordinating dies add smaller die-cut flowers on top of larger ones.
8. The "Thanks" sentiment can be used alone or paired with the "for everything"
9. Use the flowers, with or without the stem, depending on the look you want to achieve.
10. The dotted circle image can serve as a flower itself. Just add leaves!
You are going to love stamping with these "friendly flowers"! Make them modern and stylish or flirty and fun or you can even put a shabby spin on them depending on the colors you choose! Designed to coordinate with the previously released Friendly Flower die, these flowers are packed with style and detail that you are sure to love!
*This stamp set does not include a CD case.
This set comes divided between two 4x6 acetate sheets. The large flower images measure approximately 1 7/8" all the way around. The smallest flower measures 7/8" all the way around. The "Just because" sentiment measures 1 3/4" x 1".
Coordinating Products
Index Label - Friendly Flowers
Price: $1.00
Papertrey Ink - Friendly Flower Extras Die
Price: $6.00
Related Products
Ombre Sentiments: Christmas Stamp Set
Price: $15.00
Lucky Scratch: Baby Mini Stamp Set
Price: $5.00
Enchanted Forest Stamp Set
Price: $15.00


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Tuesday, May 27, 2014
KARA Project Episode 1 with subtitles
Labels: KARA, Kara Project, TV Show, Youtube
Wa$$up - "FIRE" (BRAZIL 2014) making
Labels: International, MV, WA$$UP
KARA Project Start! Do you want to participate?
New and some how "polemic" KARA Project has started this May 27th. The girls faced their first challenge, trying to win a spot in one of the most popular K-Pop girl groups; KARA.
There is a judge system, but also its a fan voting sistem.
Aside the judges vote, fans can give a vote via SNS or LINE app.
30% of the total score its made by judges votes, 40% by Pre-vote and Live-vote and the other 30% its made by LINE votes, this is called GLOBAL vote.
So if you have a LINE account you can give a vote for your favorite Baby KARA member.
You can download the apps from www.dspkara.com
Labels: Internet, KARA, Kara Project, TV Show
After School Image Madness: Japanese Goods
Labels: AFTERSCHOOL, goods
AOA Image Madness: Idol Futsal Championship 2014
Hello Venus Image Madness: Idol Futsal Championship 2014
Labels: Hello Venus, photos
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)


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One morning a couple of weeks ago, I went for a walk in the well-to-do neighborhood in Austin where I was staying with friends. Yard men, pool cleaners, construction hands, and their pickup trucks were everywhere. The workers were almost all Hispanics of dubious legal status. The Anglos I saw were walkers like me. Or bike riders.
Before setting off, I had read a David Brooks' column on selfishness and altruism (New York Times, June 2, 2017). It was remarkably simple-minded, and seemed even more so, coming as it did from a University of Chicago graduate who reads instead of sleeping. He made the case that the antidote to President Trump's pernicious self-absorption is for all of us to commit more acts of kindness. It seemed like a reach.
His words were going around in my mind as I moved along at a medium mosey, dodging the pickups and wondering if I would see an ICE raid on these hard-working brown men I was among.
About a mile out, I began to have a twinge in my low back and hip. That was not unusual. I've been living with back trouble for decades. I manage it. Most of the time moderate exercise has an immediate palliative effect. Not this time.
Rather than taking a chance on the pain becoming serious, I turned around and started back to my digs. Normally, I would not have been so prudent, but I was in town to attend the high school graduation of a granddaughter that evening. And I had a full schedule of visits with family and friends over the next few days. It wouldn't do to be immobilized by back spasms.
Suddenly, the pain became severe. Within a few minutes my stride was reduced to about six inches, and I was stopping often to lean over, hands on knees, hoping for relief, and trying to make a plan for how to get back home.
I sat down on the curb once, but the pain of standing up again was too much to bear. Better just to keep inching forward.
In a well-motivated but mistaken decision, I had purposely left my phone behind. A phone has no place on a quiet morning walk. But as I struggled to move along a few inches at a time, I surely did wish I had it with me. Ann was back in Saranac Lake, but my sons live in Austin, so I could have called one of them. It would have been an interesting conversation. "Hey, it's Dad. Can you take a minute and come pick me up? I'm standing in the gutter on Scenic Drive, and I can't move."
A pruning crew was working in some Live Oak trees across the way. I thought about calling out to them. But I'm a man, and men don't like to admit to needing help, especially not from strangers. It would be an admission of weakness. Anyway, I guessed they might call EMS, and that would be a big inconvenience. I had things to do that couldn't be done in an ER. Besides that, back spasms almost always go away after a while, no treatment required beyond rest and a few pills.
Several walkers passed by. They greeted me cheerfully, and if they noticed something amiss, it didn't affect their responses. A bike rider sang out, "Good morning." Even in my messed-up state, it occurred to me that if she was so visually impaired that she couldn't see how much trouble I was in, she shouldn't be out riding a bicycle. (I didn't think for a minute that she was just hard-hearted, but she may have been.)
Unexpected thoughts like those that accompany a high fever put in an appearance.
A hot-weather marathon. An out-and-back course. At the thirteen-mile turnaround, I was too dehydrated to continue. I started walking, thinking that I'd catch a ride back to the start. There were worse things than being a "Did Not Finish." Death by overheating, for one
.Once in a while an aid worker on a bicycle would appear, and we would have a brief but somewhat disappointing colloquy.
"How you doing?"
"Terrible. I need a ride." I seemed to be speaking a language unknown to anyone but me. The race was in Canada. Maybe they spoke only Canadian. They knew a little English, though. They'd respond, "Hang in there," and then they'd pedal away.The first one gave me a sip of water, but ones who showed up later had run out.
Back to Austin. After a bit, I could hardly move, and I concentrated on not crying out. I was going to have to do something.
I thought about the stinking, hungry, hopeless homeless people I had looked away from and passed by over the years.
A truck pulling a trailer full of lawnmowers stopped a little way up the block. The driver seemed to be looking at me. Could it be?
He got out and walked toward me.
"Are you all right?" He didn't wait for an answer. "Do you want me to take you home?"
He carefully muscled me into his truck.
"Where to?"
I think I could have said just about anywhere, and he would have taken me there; he seemed that kind. On the way, he talked. It was like a hit of Demerol. Let me know in so many words that though back pain can seem like the end of the world, it isn't. His grandmother in Mexico treats her bad back by rubbing on an ointment she makes out of marijuana and alcohol.
When we got to my friends' house, I offered my profuse thanks and got out. He drove away without my learning anything about him except his name – Nathario – and that he worked in yards all around the neighborhood. A couple of days later, when I was up to driving, I went around looking for him, but without success.
"Amigo, por favor, yo busco por un hombre llame Nathario." Maybe my pitiable Gringo Spanish was the reason I got nothing but shrugs. On the other hand, given how much talk was in the air about the wall and deportation, I shouldn't have been surprised at their responses. Another possibility. A bilingual friend had never heard of the name "Nathario;" had I lived a moment of magic realism? My Samaritan was Latino.
It's tempting to generalize from this incident. Poor Hispanics are more empathetic than well-off Anglos. People who scratch out a living doing manual labor are kinder than people near the top of the heap. Of course not. It was just that this one man who happened to be a Hispanic mower of lawns responded to my need, and some other people who happened to be Anglos and who hire people like Nathario to mow their lawns did not respond. Surely the capacity for kindness and for selfishness is pretty evenly distributed among ethnic groups and economic classes.
Bit by bit, my day improved; the pain abated enough so that I was able to get around if I moved slowly and carefully. Some of that was due to a fast-acting drug. Much of it came from the loving care of my host and old friend Carolyn, an offering she has made repeatedly over many years. Short of calling 911 (not appropriate) or putting me in touch with her neurosurgeon (overkill at that moment), she couldn't do much beyond letting me know that my pain mattered to her and asking if I needed medicine or a heating pad. That was a lot.
By loading up on pain medication and leaning on a cane Carolyn loaned me, I was able to go to the graduation ceremony. My son stopped by for me, and I hobbled down the driveway to his car. I imagined him thinking, "It's happened. It was always something that was in the future. But no longer. I have become father to my father." I suppose his thoughts were not that full blown, but he probably felt something of the sort.
When the last strains of "Pomp and Circumstance" had died away, and thousands of family members (there were over four hundred graduates) gathered at a favorite spot to take photos, I received still another gift of unwarranted kindness.
I've never lived closer than a couple of thousand miles of my grandchildren. We see each other once or twice a year for a day or two. I hardly know fifteen-year-Jesse. He's a little shy, and I don't recall any conversations of substance with him. But when I was shuffling my feet trying to push through the crowd and keep up with the family, he who talks little, said, "Grandfather, put your hand on my shoulder. I'll get you through this." I've seen blind people in the Middle East being led by children in that way.
By chance, I ended the evening having supper with my first wife, Judy. It's been many years since we were tormented by the awfulness of our marriage dissolution, but still, there has always been – on my part at least – some discomfort in being together. Not that evening, though. We chatted and laughed and celebrated in an easy way having retained affection and respect for each other.
The next morning, the pain in my back was gone. Backs are that way. Sudden onset and sometimes sudden departure of pain that only hours before had been debilitating. It seems like a matter of luck. But in this instance, more than luck was involved. I'm sure of it. I have no idea what caused the pain to start, but I do know what pushed it away. It was the caring responses of Nathario, Carolyn, Jesse, and Judy.
David Brooks may be right. Acts of kindness are so powerful they may even be the antidote to a President whose destructive narcissism threatens us all.
Soon after returning to Saranac Lake, I drove to the annual meeting of the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, held this year in Manchester, New Hampshire. There I was to receive an award for Ruminations of a Geezerblockhead.
It was not to be; that most unreliable of human organs acted out again. I was unable to move when the time came to take my bow. (Ann had to come from Saranac Lake and drive me home.) I didn't have my photo taken with Maureen Dowd, who was getting a lifetime achievement award. And I wasn't standing by the podium when the following was proclaimed aloud to the assembled multitude:
Paul Willcott understands the beautiful specificity of things – his cat, his wood stove, his copy of the Times Literary Supplement, the articles in which are not always so beautifully specific. He writes about how a door may frame what lies beyond and how the clutter of our workspaces frames our lives as if autobiography is always captured in our peripheral vision. He writes about past battles with noisy radiators and current battles with noisy squirrels and noisy ghosts, though if ghosts they are, they are the ghosts of the nuns who once occupied the "erstwhile monastery" in which he lives, and their noise "angelic." One thing a writer can do is create a life into which the reader can slip for just a while and think it would be pleasant to stay. That's what Willcott does.
To paraphrase Mae West, my writing has been rejected (over and over starting in the sixties), and now it has been praised. Being praised is better.


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Corn Potato String Band
Thursday, September 20, 2018 Concert 7:30 pm at Fort Hunter
About This Event:
The Corn Potato String Band has earned high praise in traditional American music, keeping old time fiddle and banjo music from a one-way trip to the dustbins of history.
The Corn Potato String Band has earned high praise in traditional American music, keeping old time fiddle and banjo music from a one-way trip to the dustbins of history. They have delighted audiences with their driving fiddle tunes and harmonious singing across the US, Canada, Europe, Mexico, and India. They are all multi-instrumentalists dedicated to continuing the music and dance traditions of the Central and Southern US. In addition to being champion fiddlers they play banjo, guitar, bass and mandolin and deftly handle many different antiquated styles including ballads, hoedowns, country rags and Southern gospel, specializing in twin fiddling and double banjo tunes.
Aaron Jonah Lewis is a multi-instrumentalist, performer and educator. He has won awards at the Clifftop Appalachian String Band Festival, including First Place Neotraditional Band in 2008, and at the Galax Old Fiddlers Convention, including First Place Bluegrass Fiddle in 2007, and he has performed at major festivals from the US to the UK and from Italy to Finland.
Lindsay McCaw has been playing American old time music for over 15 years. She performs music and calls dances around the country. McCaw plays fiddle, banjo, guitar, accordion and piano. She has won several musical distinctions such as two-time winner of the Minneapolis Jug Band Contest and four-time Grand Prize winner of the Sheffield Field Days Fiddle contest.
Ben Belcher is an accomplished banjo player and a talented artist. He has distinguished himself with such awards as the Independent Music World Series, which he won with The Hot Seats in Nashville, TN, in 2006; First Place Neotraditional Band at the Appalachian String Band Festival in 2008; and a Herald Angel award at the 2009 Edinburgh Fringe. Belcher has toured extensively in the US and in Europe and the UK since 2001.


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You might have met her in the eye-opening documentary about plus-size fashion and blogging, Plus Size Wars, but today blogger Bethany Rutter is reminding us why she belongs in the spotlight with her latest beach selfie. It's the perfect reminder that you need to do you — and love your body the way it is — now that we're officially at the beginning of "bathing suit season."
The photo of Rutter on the beach is almost deceptively simple: Another welcome addition to the pictures of women in fatkinis that are my lifeblood in these summer months. While showing off your plus-size body in public is still always brave on some level, upon closer look, Rutter's selfie is extra subversive.
The image, posted to her Instagram account, not only shows off her exquisite beach body. The photo also prominently features many things that break the "fashion rules." The writer's many tattoos, visible body hair, and her strapless bikini, just to name a few. And the caption? A simple statement that says everything: "I love myself." Not despite anything, not because of anything, no modifiers, no explanations. Just pure self love. It's something that was hard-won, which makes Rutter's show of confidence and acceptance even more impactful. "Even when I was less fat, and would shave my body hair, and fake tan myself before going to the beach, and didn't have tattoos, I never felt this comfortable," Rutter tells Bustle.
While those of us who dwell in the fat positive places of the Internet may be used to seeing and praising all types of bodies on the regular, there still exists still a very obvious mainstream beauty ideal — and an idea of what makes a "good fatty." While there are certain celebrities or bloggers who are more in the public eye, whom have been deemed "acceptable" by at least some folks, they are only a fraction of the tiniest percentage of all the different ways there are to have a plus size, non-normative body.
Whether it's being covered in tattoos, being unapologetically fat (uh, that cute "live fat, die yum" tattoo), being a femme with body hair, or wearing whatever bathing suit you want on your plus size body, the reception is hardly the same to Melissa McCarthy's red carpet appearances.
Rutter says that wearing a bikini in public is a test of how her self image has changed over time. "It's where I'm able to put all the self-love I've learned through its paces, and I'm grateful that every single time, it comes out stronger than ever. I spent too many years worrying and denying myself these experiences, and now it's time to just go for it." May we all be able to say the same, at some point, about our summers.
Images: Arched Eyebrow; archedeyebrow/Instagram


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December 1st is right around the corner, and it has finally hit me…I'M GOING TO NEW YORK!
I've been planning this trip for months; but truthfully, I've been planning this trip in my head for years. My fascination with this city sprouted from movies and TV shows, but the show that truly made me daydream about NY was, of course, Gossip Girl. Because if Blair Waldorf and Chuck Bass can find love in New York, then so can I…
KIDDING. Not the purpose of this trip at all. I mainly just want to see all the famous landmarks, buildings, parks, museums, and just overall streets that I've been googling since I was a little girl. There's just a certain magic about New York and it's one of the cities that I KNOW won't disappoint.
I've taken it super chill with the planning of this trip. I know areas I want to see, landmarks I want to visit, attractions I want to attend, and food I want to eat. But as far as an itinerary goes—I'm taking it easy this trip.
Although there is a lot I want to see, I am mostly excited to just explore the city day by day and figure it out as we go.
My biggest issue right now? How am I supposed to fit all my winter coats in a suitcase?!
If you were wondering, the pink off the shoulder top that I'm wearing is by Tobi, my distressed jeans are from Citizens of Humanity, coat from Aritzia, and boots are from Public Desire!
Hope you guys enjoyed this post! And hopefully by next week, this street corner will be replaced, and my background image will be the Flatiron building rather than our Gastown replica.
Until next time,


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Add the History Object To Your Page Layout (video 2:23)
Before you can view your Sent Email history within your lead and contact records, you will first have to adjust your page layout to make those objects visible. In this video we will walk you through adding the following objects:
- VR Email History Lead
- VR Email History Contact
Other Salesforce Reporting video tutorials:
Related Tutorials
- Oops! Something Went Wrong in My Email! (Webinar)
- How Your Email is Impacted by SPAM Laws (Webinar)
- 30-Minute Email Recipes (Webinar)
- Get the Inside Scoop on Google Analytics (Webinar)
- Give Your Marketing Collateral a Spring Refresh (webinar)
- Email Delivery 101 – How to Get Your Emails Delivered (webinar)
- Define Your WoW! Factor – Create an Unforgettable Brand (webinar)
- 10 Tips to Grow Your Email Lists (webinar)
- Make 2014 Your Most Organized Year Yet (webinar)
- Uninstall VerticalResponse for Salesforce


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The Lite Sprites come from Lite-Topia, an enchanted world full of different lights and colors. There are a range of toy characters for children to collect. Prisma herself is leader of all the Sprites, and this set comes with her figurine in her own little pod as well as the Lite Wand that your child will need if they're going to interact with other characters from the series.
The main selling point of the Lite Sprites range is the way in which the Lite Wand can recognize colors from the world around us, when your child points it at a certain objects. The light at the end of the wand will light up. When they point the wand at Prisma, she'll change to match that color. When kids find a color they like, they can point it at other Lite Sprites from the range and change their color too.
Features Of The Prisma And Lite Wand
* Includes Lite Wand and Prisma character,
* Prisma comes with 10 favorite colors,
* Prisma comes with her own Forest Pod,
* Learn different color games,
* Cast color spells,
* The Lite Wand can capture colors of objects around the home,
* Use the Lite Wand to send this color to Prisma,
* Makes magical sounds and colorful lights,
* Interacts with Lite Sprites playsets,
* Uses 4x AAA batteries (not included).
If you've got a little girl, then you may already know that this is a "must have" item for the holiday season. What this means is there are many little girls who all want the same gift, so you'll need to buy it early to make sure you can find it in stock! As for which girls it will appeal to, the manufacturer recommends it for ages 4 and up.
Although 10 colors come with the Lite Wand on a separate color wheel, it's designed for kids to find new ones by exploring the objects around them and absorbing the colors. In this sense the set encourages kids to become more observant of their surroundings, and more creative as they search for a color that they've never used before. The wand will store colors if your child wants to bring them with them somewhere else.
Check Pricing and Availability
The fact that you can "absorb" colors with the wand and change the color of the Lite Sprite is fun, but it's a novelty that could quickly wear off. Thankfully it's not the only thing that kids can do with the Lite Sprite. There are a few different games on the Lite Wand – such needing to find the color that it shows you before the time runs out – or you can use the characters as a nightlight (Prisma stays lit up for around 12 minutes).


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Apperian to Host Webinar with 451 Research on Impact of GDPR on Enterprise Mobility Management Practices
BOSTON – September 21, 2017 – Apperian, an Arxan company and provider of mobile application management (MAM®) and security solutions, today announced a webinar, titled "How GDPR Impacts Your Enterprise Mobility Management Practices" taking place Thursday, 28 September 2017 at 3:00PM BST. The European Union's General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR), going into effect on 25 May 2018, expands the meaning of personal data, mandates when such data can be collected and enforces full transparency and consent from the user. Organizations of all types processing data from EU residents must evaluate – and likely make changes – to their Enterprise Mobility Management (EMM) practices in order to adhere to the new law or face severe penalties. Chris Marsh, Research Director, Workforce Productivity and Compliance at 451 Research will lead a discussion with Magnus Mjøsund, Product Manager at Apperian, on how infrastructure and operations professionals responsible for mobile and endpoint strategy can make sure their organization is compliant from day one. This interactive webinar invites attendees to submit their own questions for discussion throughout the live presentation.
Webinar Details At-A-Glance:
- Presentation: "How GDPR Impacts Your Enterprise Mobility Management Practices"
- Description: When GDPR goes into effect in May 2018, organizations of all types processing data from EU residents must evaluate their EMM practices and adhere to the new law or face severe penalties. This webinar will review the most important sections of GDPR related to enterprise mobility from an administrative and end user perspective, as well as the implications for BYOD programs. EMM should be leveraged to meet GDPR requirements, and viewers will learn how a mobile application management solution like Apperian supports privacy and mitigates risk by managing corporate data while leaving personal data untouched.
- When: Thursday, 28 September 2017 at 3:00PM BST
- Where: https://www.apperian.com/resources/upcoming-webinar-gdpr-impacts-enterprise-mobility-management-practices/
- Who: Chris Marsh, Research Director, Workforce Productivity and Compliance at 451 Research and Magnus Mjøsund, Product Manager at Apperian
About Apperian Apperian provides the leading enterprise-class mobile application management (MAM®) and security platform for the delivery of critical apps to 100% of users across an organization. Apperian provides fine-grained security and dynamic policy controls at the individual app-level for deployments where mobile device management approaches are not possible or desired, such as BYOD, contract workers and other unmanaged devices. Apperian's easy to use interface offers a private, branded consumer-like enterprise app store that greatly increases mobile app adoption and a comprehensive app management back-end for administrators to easily protect and manage their business apps and data. The company has helped IT and line of business professionals secure and deliver more than 2.5 million enterprise apps to organizations such as ACE Hardware, Amtrak, Land O'Lakes, Nationwide, PostNL and the U.S. Department of Homeland Security. Apperian, an Arxan company, is located in Boston with teams throughout the U.S., Europe, and Asia. Arxan is the trusted provider of application self-protection and management solutions. Watch a 5 minute Apperian platform demo video here to learn more and follow the company on Twitter at @Apperian and LinkedIn at Apperian. ## Media Contact: Jim Dvorak Kulesa Faul for Apperian (415) 735-1622 email@example.com


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Product Description
BraunAbility Conversion Info
Infloor Ramp
The lightweight aluminum ramp extends and retracts smoothly to allow easy access to the interior for wheelchairs and scooters. With a smooth transition plate and easy ramp angle, entry and exit are a breeze. A durable, nonskid, powder-coated finish ensures superior traction, and the slotted surface helps prevent your chair from tracking in debris.
Keyless Remote
Your mobility systems are integrated into the vehicle's keyless remote for convenience at the push of a button.
Removable Seating
For those who wish to ride up front or even drive from their wheelchair, BraunAbility makes it easy: simply unlock the seat base and roll the entire seat out. The seat can be reinstalled into the vehicle just as easily when needed.
Auto Kneel
To make boarding even easier, BraunAbility wheelchair vans feature an integrated "kneeling" system. An actuator lowers the rear suspension while the door opens, which reduces the slope of the auto ramp.
Quiet Drive®
Quiet Drive® is a groundbreaking noise reduction technology offered exclusively on BraunAbility wheelchair vans. Quiet Drive® reduces noise for a more enjoyable driving experience by using advanced acoustic techniques to identify and then block noise from entering the vehicle cabin, resulting in up to 25% overall reduction in wheelchair van noise.
Wheelchair Tie Downs
Each wheelchair van includes a standard floor-track and belt system that secures the wheelchair for transit. An optional retractable belt system is a versatile and convenient option. Independent users can even elect to have an automatic tie-down installed. Due to the wide variety of wheelchairs and tie-down systems available, we recommend that you check with your local dealer to determine which system will work best for you and your wheelchair van.
Vehicle Info
Mechanical & Powertrain
- Engine: 3.6L V6 24V VVT (FFV)
- 16 Axle Ratio
- Touring Suspension
- GVWR: 6,050 lbs
- 50 State Emissions
- Transmission w/Driver Selectable Mode, AUTOSTICK Sequential Shift Control and Oil Cooler
- Front-Wheel Drive
- Engine Oil Cooler
- 730CCA Maintenance-Free Battery w/Run Down Protection
- 160 Amp Alternator
- Towing Equipment -inc: Trailer Sway Control
- Gas-Pressurized Shock Absorbers
- Front Anti-Roll Bar
- Hydraulic Power-Assist Steering
- 20 Gal. Fuel Tank
- Single Stainless Steel Exhaust
- Strut Front Suspension w/Coil Springs
- Torsion Beam Rear Suspension w/Coil Springs
- 4-Wheel Disc Brakes w/4-Wheel ABS, Front Vented Discs, Brake Assist and Hill Hold Control
- Side Impact Beams
- Dual Stage Driver And Passenger Seat-Mounted Side Airbags
- Dual Stage Driver And Passenger Front Airbags
- Curtain 1st, 2nd And 3rd Row Airbags
- Airbag Occupancy Sensor
- Driver Knee Airbag
- Rear Child Safety Locks
- Outboard Front Lap And Shoulder Safety Belts -inc: Height Adjusters and Pretensioners
- 2nd Row Stow 'N Go Bucket Seats
- 4-Way Passenger Seat -inc: Manual Recline and Fore/Aft Movement
- Driver And Front Passenger Armrests and Rear Seat Mounted Armrest
- Manual Tilt/Telescoping Steering Column
- Leather Wrapped Steering Wheel
- Front Cupholder
- Rear Cupholder
- Valet Function
- Remote Releases -Inc: Power Cargo Access
- Cruise Control w/Steering Wheel Controls
- HVAC -inc: Underseat Ducts and Headliner/Pillar Ducts
- Locking Glove Box
- Driver Foot Rest
- Full Cloth Headliner
- Vinyl Door Trim Insert
- Leather Gear Shifter Material
- Interior Trim -inc: Chrome Interior Accents
- Day-Night Auto-Dimming Rearview Mirror
- Full Floor Console w/Covered Storage, Full Overhead Console w/Storage, Conversation Mirror and 3 12V DC Power Outlets
- Fade-To-Off Interior Lighting
- Front Map Lights
- Carpet Floor Trim
- Trunk/Hatch Auto-Latch
- Cargo Features -inc: Spare Tire Mobility Kit
- Cargo Space Lights
- FOB Controls -inc: Cargo Access and Remote Engine Start
- 5″ Touchscreen Display
- ParkView Rear Back-Up Camera
- Covered Dashboard Storage, Interior Concealed Storage, Driver And Passenger Door Bins
- Delayed Accessory Power
- Outside Temp Gauge
- Analog Display
- Manual Anti-Whiplash w/Tilt Front Head Restraints and Fixed Rear Head Restraints
- 2 Seatback Storage Pockets
- Perimeter Alarm
- Sentry Key Engine Immobilizer
- 3 12V DC Power Outlets
- Air Filtration
- Tires: 225/65R17 BSW Touring
- Wheels w/Silver Accents
- Spare Tire Mobility Kit
- Clearcoat Paint
- Body-Colored Front Bumper
- Body-Colored Rear Step Bumper
- Body-Colored Bodyside Moldings and Chrome Bodyside Insert
- Body-Colored Door Handles
- Black Front Windshield Trim
- Body-Colored Power Heated Side Mirrors w/Manual Folding
- Fixed Rear Window w/Fixed Interval Wiper, Heated Wiper Park and Defroster
- Deep Tinted Glass
- Variable Intermittent Wipers
- Galvanized Steel/Aluminum Panels
- Lip Spoiler
- Chrome Grille
- Power Sliding Rear Doors
- Power Liftgate Rear Cargo Access
- Fully Automatic Aero-Composite Halogen Daytime Running Headlamps w/Delay-Off
- Front Fog Lamps
- Perimeter/Approach Lights
- LED Brakelights


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The purpose of this fellowship will be to support the awardee's attendance at the IADR Academy and IADR General Session & Exhibition, and then to have a research experience in a renowned research laboratory immediately before or after the IADR General Session.
The purposes of the visit are to:
Network with colleagues in in the area of the candidate´s own research.
Develop an understanding of contemporary research environments.
Learn new and innovative research techniques that can advance the science undertaken by Fellow on their return to their home.
Develop shared research protocols and possible funding applications.
The purpose of this fellowship will be to support the awardee's attendance at the IADR Academy and IADR General Session & Exhibition, and then to have a research experience in a renowned research laboratory immediately before or after the IADR General Session.
The purposes of the visit are to:
The candidate:
Each fellowship is $5,000 USD for travel and accommodation for visiting a research laboratory proximate to the meeting for a period of up to three weeks immediately before or after the IADR General Session. Registration for the IADR Academy and IADR General Session is included for the successful applicant.
The 2019 IADR STAR Network Academy Fellowship labs will take place in the Washington D.C. area and are to be determined.
Sponsoring Laboratories as of July 18, 2019:
Howard University, Washington, D.C.
1. Sponsoring Lab: Molecular Biology research
Mentor: Dr. Xinbin Gu
Description: Dr. Xinbin Gu has primarily focused her research in cancer biology, cancer chemoprevention and cancer treatment for head and neck squamous cell carcinoma (HNSCC) and other types of cancers. Her group has reported that vitamin E succinate (alpha-TOS) is able to effectively inhibit HNSCC growth and viability in in vitro and in animal model systems (Clin Cancer Res 2008;15:1840-8). Dr. Gu's group has discovered a natural compound, Salvianolic Acid B (Sal-B), that suppresses cancer growth through selectively inhibiting cyclooxygenase-2 (COX-2) expression to modulate the cell cycle and apoptosis (Int J Cancer 2009:124:2200-9; Cancer Prevention Res 2010;3:787-96; Oncotarget 2018, PMID: 30555632). Overexpression of COX-2 in the oral mucosa increases the risk of HNSCC. Understanding that selective COX-2 inhibitors can be used as chemo-preventative agents to reduce the risk of cancer. Currently, her group is working on understanding Sal-B's pharmacokinetics and is developing a delivery system for future clinical trials.
Dr. Gu's group has also identified a set of cancer-associated miRNAs and characterized their functions and specific targets using various molecular techniques. Some miRNAs have shown promise in developing novel diagnostic markers and targeted therapies for head and neck cancer (Cancer Prevention Res 2011;4:1073-1083; Oncotarget 2017, PMID: 28212569). In recent years, Dr. Gu's group has been working on a NIDCR funded project to develop the next generation of immunotherapy for cancer. Some of their ongoing developments include a humanized EGFR and EGFRvlll-bispecific immunotoxin for head and neck cancer therapy. In addition, Dr. Gu's group has been working on a NDAF funded project to identify noninvasive salivary biomarkers for early diagnosis of diabetes and gum disease. They have found that the levels of salivary mucin proteins, such as mucin 7 and 5, are correlated with A1C levels. Their next step involves comparing and verifying the results within various populations.
2. Sponsoring Lab: Dental Material Research
Mentor: Dr. Tongxin Wang
Description: Dr. Tongxin Wang is a professor, who is jointly appointed with the College of Dentistry and Center for Nanomaterials in College of Engineering. Dr. Wang obtained his Ph.D. from the Institute of Chemistry at the Chinese Academy of Sciences (ICCAS) in 2003. Before he joined Howard University in 2007, Dr. Wang worked at the Max Planck Institute of Colloids and Interfaces in Germany in 2003 and at the University of Pennsylvania in 2005 as a postdoctoral fellow. The unique feature of Wang's lab is to combine polymers, nanomaterials, biomimetic / bio-inspired materials, and composites in order to develop novel biomaterials for bone and tooth application. Dr. Wang's research has been supported by NIH R01, R56, RCMI/RTRN, the Department of Defense, and the Colgate Palmolive Company. His current research projects include:
Application requires the following:
Recipients of the IADR STAR Network Academy Fellowship will be required to submit a brief report on their experiences to IADR at the conclusion of the fellowship which may be published as part of the IADR Global Research Update, and will be reported to the IADR Board and Council on an annual basis.
View Past Recipients of the IADR STAR Network Academy Fellowship


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We shipped Pagan from DFW Dallas / Fort Worth DFW International Airport to DUB Dublin Airport in Ireland. Pagan flew on United Airlines with a comfort stop in EWR Newark New Jersey.
The following two tabs change content below.
David Landers DVM
Veterinarian at AirVets Pet Relocation
Dr. David Landers is a 2003 graduate of Texas A&M University College of Veterinary Medicine. He started AirVets Pet Relocation and focuses on international pet shipping, health certificates, and export/import documents.
Latest posts by David Landers DVM (see all)
- Atlas flew to Oslo - September 7, 2017
- Raga went to Guam - August 2, 2017
- Hart flew with us to Germany - December 7, 2016


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Frozen Troll
|This article is in need of content, please consider adding to it.
Frozen Troll is one kind of trolls, only found in Namtar's Lair or some class challenges. Instead fast regen, it has 50% of both resistances. As a result, it is identical to Meat Man in terms of damage and health; but it heals twice as fast, so regen-fighting it is very hard. Additionally, magic resist 50% makes APHEELSIK less efficient. Combined with the dungeon's high difficulty modifier, standard characters will not be able to kill higher level frozen trolls.
Though the monster is very hard to fight, if you have BYSSEPS, or knockback plus Stone Form it is possible to erode its resists and finally beat him. Because frozen trolls appear in Namtar's Lair and Binlor Ironshield is a perfect god to worship in the dungeon, it is an effective way to kill this monster. There are plenty of walls to make a knockback chain. Moreover, Binlor gives Magic resist which makes the fight even easier.


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Advanced Themeing
Note: the presenter is ill and this session is cancelled.
This session will cover how to unlock the power of Drupals theme system utilizing theme overrides, hooks, and the Theme Registry.
We'll discuss briefly some of the changes from Drupal 6 to 7, the different things you can accomplish through the theme layer, and look at some examples of code to show some of the advanced features available in the theme system (both inside themes and modules).
A knowledge of PHP is expected as this session doesn't dive into the front end and GUI aspect of theming, but is rather code heavy.
- Login to post comments


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An earworm, sometimes known as a brainworm, sticky music, or stuck song syndrome, is a catchy piece of music that continually repeats through a person's mind after it is no longer playing. (Wikipedia)
I am sure that we have all experienced the above phenomenon at one time or another. There are times when I have an earworm singing and I don't even know how it got into my head in the first place! Sometimes when I wake up in the morning, I already have one singing away! (The early bird gets the worm??)
Aside from the annoying songs and commercial jingle earworms, I can also suffer from negative thought earworms. Joyce Meyers would call it "stinkin' thinkin"! Fear and anxiety earworms are my most common ones followed by insecurity and poor-self-image earworms.
These earworms chant a changing chorus of "you're sick again", "you're still in pain", "you're too tired", "you don't have enough money to pay the bills", "your loved ones are in trouble – again", "you're overweight", "you're not doing enough for God", "you're not believing enough" etc., etc., etc.!
Blessedly, there is treatment for those negative earworms! I simply apply a good dosing of the truth of God's Word. By filling my head, and my heart with what God has to say about any of those situations, I can drown out those negative earworms. I choose to change the channel and tune into the good things that God has to say about me and think upon all the good things that He has given me.
Php 4:8 Finally, my brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honest, whatever things are right, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there is any virtue and if there is any praise, think on these things.
Php 4:7 And the peace of God which passes all understanding shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
See – no more negative earworms!
The Song That Never Ends
This is the song that never end
Yes, it goes on and on my friend
Some people started singing it not knowing what it was
And they'll continue singing it forever just because
This is the song that never ends…
(Norman Martin)
(Earworm image from Room217.ca)