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The hundreds of apple varieties that have been found in recent years are stunning in their diversity and the window they open into the tastes and habits of the past.
By KIRK JOHNSON, The New York Times
STEPTOE, Whitman County — David Benscoter honed his craft as an investigator for the FBI and the U.S. Treasury, cornering corrupt politicians and tax evaders. The lost apple trees that he hunts down now are really not so different. People and things, he said, tend to hide in plain sight if you know how and where to look.
"It's like a crime scene," Benscoter, 62, said as he hiked down a slope toward a long-abandoned apple orchard planted in the late 1800s. "You have to establish that the trees existed and hope that there's a paper trail to follow."
About two-thirds of the $4 billion apple industry is now concentrated in Washington state — and 15 varieties, led by the Red Delicious, account for about 90 percent of the market. But the past looked, and tasted, much different: An estimated 17,000 varieties were grown in North America over the centuries, and about 13,000 are lost.
From New England through the Midwest and the South to Colorado and Washington, where small family farms were long anchored by an orchard, most apple trees died along with the farms around them as industrial-scale agriculture conquered American life a century ago.
But some trees persisted. They faded into woods, or were absorbed by parks or other public lands. And the hundreds of varieties that have been found in recent years are stunning in their diversity and the window they open into the tastes and habits of the past.
Mother apples, for example, were good for making dessert. If you wanted less juice, you went for a Limber Twig. Aesthetic perfection and pretty names were once unimportant. The Rambo apple was described in one old guidebook as "speckled, with large rough dots."
Apples are where food meets history, hunters say, and a community has risen up around the pursuit of them. Benscoter fell into it after retirement here in Eastern Washington when a friend with a disability asked him to pick apples from an old orchard behind her house, and no one could identify what they were. John Bunker, an apple hunter in Maine, became entranced by the old trees he found growing in the woods. Lee Calhoun, a retired Army lieutenant colonel, started hunting in North Carolina and began to see old apples as a remnant of faded Southern life.
Now, some old varieties have become available again, through small specialty nurseries like the co-op that Bunker helped start in Maine and through university agricultural programs. Commercial growers, however, said old apples had faded for a reason and were probably not coming back.
"They're hard to grow," said Mac Riggan, the director of marketing at Chelan Fresh, which has 26,000 acres of fruit trees, mostly apples, in central Washington. Old varieties, Riggan said, either bruise easily, do not store well or do not produce enough apples per tree. And economic pressure is relentless. "Land costs money," he said.
Benscoter said that because of his investigative background, and because apple growing had come much later to this corner of the West, his methods were different from those of hunters in older parts of the nation.
Often, he said, library archives or county records show what was grown and available, which helps him identify old trees. A woman recently sent him a catalog from 1912 she had found in her attic. It listed more than 140 apple varieties then available in Washington. Documents from county fairs — what apples were offered for judging — have provided more evidence.
Most apple varieties, produced by chance intermingling of pollen from neighboring trees on family farms, cannot be definitively identified by DNA, so the history is important. Plant scientists said old varieties might have something to teach as well about evolution or climate, in looking at the qualities that kept a particular tree going despite the odds.
"That's my scientific curiosity: How did this plant do it? How did it survive when others died?" said Amit Dhingra, an associate professor of horticulture at Washington State University who works with Benscoter and the Whitman County Historical Society on the Lost and Heritage Apples of the Palouse project
The bittersweet element in apple-tree hunting is that failure often plays a big role.
Consider, for example, the story of Robert Burns. He was a young farmer who came to southeast Washington State in 1888, according to county records.
Burns was in his early 20s, and he first tried wheat, but the torrential rains of 1893 destroyed the crops. He then turned his hand to growing fruit but, in his inexperience, planted mostly apple varieties that ripen in summer and fall. It turned out to be a disastrous choice.
By the mid-1890s, the railroads were changing everything, and winter apples had seized the market because they could better withstand shipment to markets back East. The dream of a Burns orchard stumbled and fell, and by 1899 he was bankrupt.
But he planted at least one Dickinson apple tree that survived, and a Nero tree, too — both believed lost until Benscoter rediscovered them.
Debbie Druffel and her husband, Roy, wheat farmers in nearby Pullman, are now growing tiny grafted shoots of Dickinson and Nero in their garage. They became fascinated by apples when they found an abandoned orchard bordering one of their fields, and they now hope to grow an entire orchard of the lost and found behind the house.
"If Dave keeps finding stuff, we'll keep planting it," Debbie Druffel said.
But on bigger farms, new varieties, not old ones, have the money and momentum, like the Cosmic Crisp, developed here in Washington and recently planted on a commercial scale.
On a recent morning at Steptoe Butte State Park, where Benscoter has focused his work, he hiked toward an Arkansas Beauty apple tree, perhaps the only one on the planet now bearing fruit.
The tree was about 12 feet tall and twisted with age. Benscoter hoisted up the chain saw he had carried out from his truck and pruned off some small branches, which will stimulate the tree to grow new shoots that can be grafted next year onto other trees. And so another relic from America's past will live on.
Originally published June 1, 2017 at 6:01 am, updated June 2, 2017 at 12:30 am


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For his feature debut, L.A.-born Hungary resident Nimród Antal made Kontroll, a farcical look at the Budapest subway system, about the crazy ticket agents who earn their living there and the hostile citizens they deal with on a daily basis. At the center of it all is Bulcsú (Sándor Csányi), a quiet fellow who leads his ragtag crew that includes the Professor (more
72 out of 100 Metascore®
Generally favorable reviews
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Disclosure: I was provided Erbaviva Lip & Chest Balm, Nighty Night Essence and Sniffles Chest Balm to facilitate this review. All opinions are 100% my own.
If you're a regular visitor to this blog, you may have noticed that there are several topics that I
don't shut up about am very passionate about. Natural skincare, organic ingredients, aromatherapy and healthy food are just a few of my obsessions, and when I find a product or brand that is obsession-worthy, I feel that it is only right to share my discovery with my fellow mamas (and if I can add a giveaway, all the better).
So here we go: Erbaviva.
Erbaviva is an absolutely gorgeous line of completely natural organic skincare products for mothers and babies. Created using only the highest quality natural and organic ingredients and free of pesticides and other toxins, Erbaviva is the perfect collection of products for women seeking safe, pure and luxurious skincare. And believe me, it is truly luxurious.
When it comes to Baby's delicate, fragile, and sensitive skin, the products we use should be equally sweet and gentle. Erbaviva's moisturizing emollients and base oils keep Baby's skin nourished and extra soft, while the soothing essential oils and extracts provide calming, therapeutic effects.
My children and I tried the Sniffles Baby Chest Balm, Nighty Night essence, and the Baby Lip & Cheek Balm. Each product was rich and extra-emollient, but also super absorbent. The calming essential oils add another dimension of soothing relaxation.
Erbaviva's Sniffles Baby Chest Balm is bursting with soothing organic goodness and healing benefits. When my son developed a cold during the season change, the balm provided much needed natural relief for his cough and stuffy nose, and soothed his fussiness with its calming lavender, chamomile and calendula fragrance. Even if your baby doesn't have a cold, the balm really works wonders at calming a cranky kiddo. The balm rubs on smoothly, absorbs quickly, and doesn't leave oil or residue on clothing. It's definitely one of my favorite new additions to my Mommy Bag of Tricks.
The Nighty Night essence transforms bath time into a relaxing experience for both Mom and Baby. A few drops of this fragrant blend of lavender, chamomile and sandalwood, and Baby is ready for a restful night of sleep. My kids now request their Nighty Night essence at every bath!
While the Lip & Cheek Balm is meant to sooth Baby's dry skin and chapped lips, it's quickly become my go-to for instantly smooth, soft lips and nourished moisturized skin. I use it on my children to prevent dry skin from changing weather, to protect against windburn during walks on windy days, and to keep their sweet little lips soft and nourished, but I also use it for me! It's fantastic for dry hands, rough skin and chapped lips, and kept me soft and smooth during the dry winter months. I adore its amazing rosemary and calendula scent, and its natural emollients and skin protectants. Let's just say it lives in my purse more than it lives in the diaper bag.
Erbaviva's fabulous line of baby products is so naturally effective and soothing, and so deliciously rich and fragrant, that I can't imagine using anything else to calm my babies (or myself) at bath and bed time! Visit Erbaviva online and on Facebook and Twitter for more information about these absolutely gorgeous products.
AND….be sure to enter our Erbaviva giveaway! We'll be giving TWO lucky Philly Burb Moms each their own Nighty Night essence and Lip & Cheek Balm! Good luck!


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CPM Managed IT Services
CPM Networks Managed IT Services are Project based and On-Going support. CPM Network's begins with an initial consultation & comprehensive analysis of your current technology. You will receive proactive maintenance of your infrastructure, 24×7 monitoring of your network's vitals. All provided to your business through remote support or onsite IT support as needed.
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You are here
Arboretums and public gardens
Find free things to do including museums, gardens, zoos and historic sites in Chicago, Springfield and other locations around Illinois.
Follow your nose to one of these noteworthy Midwest gardens for dazzling rose displays and heaps of planting inspiration.
Cure cabin fever with a visit to some of our favorite gardens and arboretums. Bundle up to stroll under snow-covered branches and follow animal trails—or escape to the tropics for an afternoon in one...
Things to do in Madison include Dane County Farmers' Market, Wisconsin's state capitol, Frank Lloyd Wright homes and Olbrich Botanical Gardens.
Unspoiled countryside and plenty of outdoor fun await in this rugged state. Highlights include Theodore Roosevelt National Park, the International Peace Garden and the Maah Daah Hey Trail as well as...
From the travel experts at Midwest Living, here is a list of Chicago's best attractions, including museums, gardens, sports and music.
Parks, museums and other attractions (many free!) draw visitors to Saint Louis. Explore Forest Park, including the Saint Louis Zoo and Missouri History Museum; the Gateway Arch; Citygarden; the...
The Minneapolis-Saint Paul metro area strikes a great balance between city-cool and eco-friendly, and between history and hip. Discover the Twin Cities through attractions like the Science Museum of...
Want to squeeze one more Chicago sight into your day? These spots promise memorable visits in just 60 quick minutes.
Whether you're looking for a scenic place to walk or for gardening education, these public gardens throughout the Midwest will inspire you.


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This low-budget freak show/cult classic/cultural institution concerns the misadventures of Brad Majors (Barry Bostwick) and Janet Weiss (Susan Sarandon) inside a strange mansion that they come across on a rainy night. After the wholesome pair profess their love through an opening song, their car breaks down in the woods, and they seek refuge in a towering castle nearby. Greeting them at the door is a ghoulish butler named Riff Raff (Richard O'Brien), who introduces them to a bacchanalian collection of...more
55 out of 100 Metascore®
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They Found Him Dead by Georgette Heyer
Oh, Georgette Heyer, who are these people you create who joke around when they are repeatedly having attempts made on their lives?
There is a fair amount of acrimony in the air at Silas Kane's 60th birthday party. His business partners are begging him to assent to some sort of Australian 'scheme,' the details of which are never fully laid out, but they aren't really important anyway. Then there's Rosemary Kane, who is possibly the most ridiculous woman in the history of literature – and what's more, she knows it! Rosemary completely owns up to her selfishness and mercenary nature and doesn't bother to hide the fact that she's seriously considering leaving her well-off but not rich husband Clement for her handsome boy toy because she simply can't be happy without a load of money. When Silas is found dead the next morning, the original conclusion is that his fall from the cliff was simply an accident, but when his heirs start dying, it becomes increasingly apparent that something more is going on, and that perhaps Silas's death was no accident.
This is my second foray into Georgette Heyer's mysteries. This one was a bit slower start – "Death in the Stocks" started with a dead body, so when "They Found Him Dead" started with Silas's birthday party I found the first 20 pages or so slow going. I actually picked this book up once and put it back down, to pick it up again a few weeks later. Perhaps I just wasn't in the right mood for it, though, because the second time I picked it up I fairly flew through it. Heyer's characters are delightfully ridiculous, and most of them are completely insipid, but in a good way. I did appreciate that "They Found Him Dead" had characters that were actually sympathetic, as opposed to "Death in the Stocks." However, I did again figure out whodunnit about half way through the book, and this time I even knew why the entire time, as opposed to last time when I was surprised by motive, but not culprit. Surprisingly, figuring out the ending really didn't mitigate my enjoyment of the book.
All in all, I think Heyer mysteries and quite delightful, and I wouldn't mind stocking up on them for fun, escapist reads.
Buy this book from:
A local independent bookstore via Indiebound.*


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Jan. 18, 2012
Cheap plastic could be used to detect nukes
Detection of nuclear material just got a little easier. Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory has announced a new material for sniffing out nuclear bombs, and it amounts to a cheap piece of plastic. It could be the future of nuclear detectors. It can tell the difference between neutron radiation and gamma radiation. That's important to people in charge of protecting ports of entry and borders. Neutrons indicate plutonium or uranium, material that can be used to make a bomb.
Improved polypropylene/clay nanocomposites
SPE Plastics Research Online
Polypropylene/montmorillonite nanocomposites are popular with researchers and industry due to their high aspect ratio and nanoscale filler distribution, which improves the composite properties at low content compared to conventional microfillers (<5wt percent="" rather="" than="">30wt percent). However, to disperse well, the naturally hydrophilic MMT has to be organically modified with quaternary alkyl ammonium ions (such as an octadecylamine group). 5wt>
Kenaf-fiber-reinforced copolyester biocomposites
SPE Plastics Research Online
Biodegradable polyesters are one family of polymers that have been considered as replacements for conventional plastic resins. Aliphatic polyesters, such as the naturally occurring polyhydroxyalkanoate family of materials and the synthetic polycaprolactone, have been investigated as possible alternatives to traditional plastics. However, their material properties seriously affect the versatility of these materials.
Compuplast provides polymer processing simulation software and services.
We specialize in Extrusion, Injection Molding, Thermoforming, Blow Molding and educational seminars on polymer processing. Stop Guessing,..Start Simulating
Chemical Foaming Agents for Molding & Extrusion
Bergen International offers a comprehensive line of Chemical Foaming Agents specifically formulated for various low density Molding and Extrusion applications and a variety of resins. NPE Booth #29027
EU Voluntary Agreement on energy in sight for Europe's plastics processors
Packaging Europe
Rapid progress is being registered in developing a voluntary agreement on energy efficiency between the Brussels-based European Plastics Convertors Association and Europe's leading national plastics processing organizations. This is the fruit of EuPlastVoltage – a European Commission funded project with the aim of developing a long-term drive to reduce energy consumption in one of Europe's most significant industries with a combined turnover of some 300 billion Euros.
Report: Global bioplastics market to hit new heights by 2018
Canadian Plastics
Led by growing demand in Asia-Pacific and South America, the worldwide bioplastics market will reach revenues of more than $2.8 billion in 2018, with annual growth rates of 17.8 percent, according to a new report from market research firm Ceresana Research.
China toy factories face troubles
Plastics News
Hong Kong's plastic toy factories face tough conditions, squeezed between weak markets overseas and rapidly rising wages and costs in their mainland China factories. In interviews at the recent Hong Kong Toy Fair, the world's second-largest toy exhibition after the Nuremburg International Toy Fair in Germany, local plastics executives and industry leaders struck tones somewhere between caution and pessimism.
Read why SIGMASOFT is different!
Axion: Plastics recycling will be key 2012 focus
Packaging News
With U.K. plastic bottle recycling rates nudging 50 percent for drink and dairy bottles, Freegard predicts that further investment in technology and equipment to extract a wider range of materials from mixed plastic collections offers major potential for improvement. The Manchester-based resource recovery firm builds and designs process plants for companies in the recycling sector.
Borealis promotes clarified PP as a replacement for PC
Plastics Today
Borealis has launched a more transparent extrusion blowmolding grade of polypropylene (PP) specifically designed for cosmetics and baby bottles, with an eye on capturing market share forsaken by polycarbonate (PC), which continues to deal with concerns around bisphenol A (BPA). The company said its Borclear RC737MO offers a "leap forward" in aesthetics by influencing the gloss, haze and clarity of bottles.
How plastic trees could help pull carbon dioxide out of the air
KQED News
A cheap plastic that removes carbon dioxide from the atmosphere? "Yes," says a team of chemists at the University of Southern California's Loker Hydrocarbon Research Institute, led by Nobel Prize winner George Olah. Science Now reports on their work with an inexpensive polymer called polyethylenimine or PEI.
INCOE® OPTI-FLO® Hot Runner Systems
hot runner manifold design features BTI's patented MeltFlipper® melt rotation technology and are exclusive to INCOE®. The technology provides homogeneous melt distribution and balanced filling to all cavities while avoiding invasive and restrictive mixers. For information on all INCOE® technology, visit
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Specialized polymer materials, services and solutions
What if you could rely on a single materials supplier to meet your global needs and help you grow, no matter where you are in the world? You can – when you work with PolyOne. Our solutions help to improve your profitability. For the biggest questions facing your business, visit
Perspectives on plastics in solar cells
Phoenix Green Business Examiner
Plastic materials are being evaluated by several leading research institutions for broadened commercial solar cell applications due to their advantages of significant cost-savings and flexibility. Concentrated photovoltaic solar cells use materials such as glass and plastic to concentrate solar radiation onto small, high-efficiency photovoltaic cells.
New 'smart' polymer opens door for medical use of low-power near-infrared light
Researchers at the University of California-San Diego have conducted initial testing of a new "smart" plastic material which may bring about new uses in medicine for near-infrared light. According to early experiments, the plastic material will break down into non-toxic particles in response to lower-power NIR light. This may lead to improved treatment of, for example, tumors, or improvements in the release of tracing compounds and imaging agents for improved medical diagnostics applications.
TRIA America LLC offers Custom Grinding Solutions
We specialize in the design and manufacturing of rotary knife granulators and grinding systems for post-production waste and recycling. For a custom solution tailored to your needs, call us at 1.877.505.TRIA.
Introducing the Datacolor 45G
The Datacolor 45G Portable 45/0 Spectrophotometer. Take the guesswork out of Appearance Quality Control with the industry's best repeatability and inter-instrument agreement.
Plastics firm leader pushes through crises
The Press
How many pause to ponder the seals in their fridge or appreciate the craftmanship of their garden hose? If plastic extrusion is not a glamorous industry, then Tom Thomson is happy for it to stay that way. Thomson is the managing director of New Zealand's Elastomer Products, the biggest plastic and rubber extrusion company in Australasia, which exports to manufacturers in Australia, southeast Asia and the United States.
Archer Daniels ends joint venture with Metabolix
The Associated Press via Bloomberg Businessweek
Archer Daniels Midland Co. said it is ending a biodegradable plastics joint venture with Metabolix Inc. because of the venture's cost, and uncertainty about its returns. The companies said the joint venture, which is called Telles, will be dissolved on Feb. 8. Telles makes plastics from corn sugar that biodegrade in natural soil and water and in home or industrial composting systems.
Diversified plastics sold to employees
Product Design and Development
James Dow, founder, president and CEO of Diversified Plastics, Inc., has announced the sale of his company to his employees through an employee stock ownership plan (ESOP). The employees took ownership on Nov. 1, but Dow will remain as president. "The changeover has been smooth," said Annette Lund, vice president.
European polyethylene prices advance amid feedstock push
European polyethylene contract and spot prices advanced this week, supported by bullish ethylene. Ethylene spot price have surged this week following historic low cracker margins touched last week. Ethylene spot prices crossed the $1,276/mt FD NWE mark this week, for the first time since mid-September.
GP:50 is proud to announce the completion of the next generation in pressure measurement. Using true thermal compensation, GP:50 Model 400 is now the most advanced, accurate and dependable pressure transmitter available on the market today.
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Pipe firms suspected of price fixing in Hungary
European Plastics News
Three plastic pipe system manufacturers, two of them leading European players, are suspected of being part of a price fixing cartel operating in Hungary. The activities of Pipelife Hungaria and Wavin Hungary, along with those of the national pipe fittings producer BTH Fitting, recently acquired by Belgium's Tessenderlo group, are being investigated by Hungary's Competition Authority GVH.
Westlake offers to purchase Georgia Gulf for $1.03 billion
Bloomberg Businessweek
Westlake Chemical Corp., the U.S. plastics maker controlled by the Chao family, made a $1.03 billion unsolicited offer for Georgia Gulf Corp. to expand into vinyl construction products such as siding and window frames. The $30-a-share bid isn't subject to any financing condition, Houston-based Westlake said in a statement.
Engineered Thermoplastic Composites
is a "complete" product portfolio of thermoplastic composite materials, where the customers' requirements define the pellet composition. For thermoplastic polymers and continuous reinforcing fibers, Complēt offers the total LFT portfolio.
New Chemistry for a Mature Industry
Cray Valley Hydrocarbon Specialty Chemicals is a Global manufacturer of specialty low molecular weight functional additives based on a variety of unique chemistries.
Oil prices rise as market tracks Nigeria, Iran
AFP via Google News
Oil prices rose this week as the market reacted to potential supply disruptions in Nigeria and Iran, while keeping a watch over fresh eurozone strains after last week's ratings downgrades, analysts said. New York's main contract, West Texas Intermediate crude for delivery in February, gained 65 cents to $99.35 a barrel.
Chemical engineers boost petrochemical output from biomass by 40 percent
Chemical engineers at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, using a catalytic fast pyrolysis process that transforms renewable non-food biomass into petrochemicals, have developed a new catalyst that boosts the yield for five key "building blocks of the chemical industry" by 40 percent compared to previous methods.
The Best Thermoset Molder in the World
Westmoreland Plastics Company has been in the forefront of Custom Molding for over five decades. This experience has given us the ability to anticipate the needs of our customers, provide the services and components they require, as well as enjoy the overall success of building long-term relationships.
Precision Parts in Liquid Silicone
Silcotech's precision liquid silicone molding, utilizes lean Six Sigma GMP and Risk Assessment. Silcotech provides complete manufacturing solutions for simple to most complex geometries. Capabilities and value added services: 2 component, micro and clean room molding, in-house tool design, complete automation, product design, engineering and prototyping.
Facilities: North-America and India
Gravimetric Blender Innovation at NPE
Process Control will be showcasing advancements in their line of gravimetric continuous and batch blenders during NPE in April [Booth #2051]. The showcase will include the redesigned Guardian® Series 2 line of batch blenders, a new brushless drive package for continuous, and color touchscreens which will be standard on all blenders.
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The development of resource potential and the rational development of subsoil resources, with strict observance of environmental safety standards and the widespread introduction of modern technologies is one of the key priorities of the Company.
In accordance with the Rosneft-2022 Strategy approved by the Company's Board of Directors, the key objectives of the Company's exploration program are defined: ensuring 100% replenishment of liquid hydrocarbon reserves and increasing the success of exploration drilling to 95% by 2022 through the development of technologies and innovative solutions.
The Company has developed and is implementing a set of research and development and experimental works, as well as measures to create its own geophysical service. Field seismic modeling methods were introduced to provide optimal monitoring systems for projects in the Samara region and Sakhalin. Work is in progress for Eastern Siberia.
A unique system of seismic data recording is in development, which has no analogues in the world. In Russia, for the first time in the industry, 3D winter testing of this system was carried out in Western Siberia, at the Ai-Yaunsky line pipe. The surveying was carried out in parallel with production works according to the standard method. Processing of the received data is fully completed. The results surpassed the expectations: geological informativeness and productivity were significantly increased, and the possibility of carrying out work in exclusive areas was proved.
To increase the success of exploration drilling, step-by-step implementation of advanced technologies for processing and interpreting seismic data continued. In particular, innovative approaches to account for inhomogeneities of the upper part of the column are used to minimize the forecast error for structures. At the design stage, finite-difference modeling of the wave field is carried out to select the optimal parameters of the seismic survey.
By the end of 2018, 142 exploration wells were tested on land in Russia, with a high success rate of 84%. Approximately 5,000 linear kilometers of 2D seismic work and 10,000 square kilometers of 3D seismic work were completed.
As a result of successful exploration, 23 fields and 230 new deposits were discovered with total reserves of 250 million tons of oil equivalent.
Replenishment of oil and gas condensate production from exploration activities amounted to 146%.
Western Siberia
The reserves addition in Western Siberia amounted to 222.8 million tons of oil and condensate and 107.7 billion cubic meters of gas. 52 exploration wells were completed and tested with a success rate of 87%. 3,600 sq. km of 3D seismic survey was completed. Two new fields and 76 new deposits with total reserves of B1C1 + B2C2 of 193.2 million tons of oil equivalent were discovered.
In 2018, the Irtyshskoye field was discovered at the new Erginskoye oil and gas cluster in West Siberia, which was formed in 2017, based on the results of re-testing of prospecting and appraisal well No.16 of Novoendyrskaya, from which oil inflow with a flow rate of 26.9 m3/day was obtained after hydraulic fracturing, with oil and liquefied gas reserves of 22.5 million tons of oil equivalent (initial recoverable reserves C1+C2).
LLC RN-Uvatneftegas is consistently implementing its strategy for the development of the Uvat project, including the annual growth in the rates of recoverable reserves. As the results of the work carried out in 2018 show, geologists still explore significantly more oil reserves than they extract from the subsoil. Thus, according to the results of LLC RN-Uvatneftegaz operations in 2018, the growth of B1C1 reserves (25.2 mln tons) exceeded the production volume (10.6 mln tons) by 238%.
The main achievement of the exploration program of LLC RN-Uvatnefetegas is the discovery of two new fields in the Khanty-Mansiysk Autonomous Okrug at the Yuganskoye-11 line pipe and the Yuganskoye-12 line pipe based on the results of drilling of the first exploration wells.
The Company continues to actively develop its gas business. In 2018, the Company's gas assets underwent geological exploration work in the amount of 280 square kilometers of 3D seismic surveying and 2 wells were tested. The increase in the Company's gas reserves in Western Siberia amounted to 107.7 billion m3 in 2018.
Work continues on the study of the unconventional gas-saturated collector of the Berezovskaya Formation in Western Siberia. In 2018, based on the results of testing of wells in the interval of the Berezovskaya Formation at the Kharamurskoye field, new gas deposits were discovered in the VB1 and NB1 formations. The increment of recoverable gas reserves of B1+B2 category within the Kharampursky line pipe amounted to 79.9 billion m3 of gas.
The Company works at the Russko-Rechenskiy license area located in the Tazovsky district of the Yamalo-Nenets autonomous district, on the border with Krasnoyarsk region. According to the results of exploration work in 2018, a record flow rate of 903 m3/day with dissolved gas was obtained during the testing of the Russko-Rechenskaya well.
In 2018, Rospan International completed the interpretation of the Minkhovsky line pipe 3D seismic survey, confirmed the prospects of the field, and specified the locations of exploration and prospecting wells as part of the continued exploration of the Gydan Peninsula.
Eastern Siberia and the Far East
The total increase in reserves in Eastern Siberia and the Far East amounted to 39.4 million tons of oil and condensate and 34,4 billion cubic meters of gas.
11 exploration wells were completed and tested with a success rate of 73%. 4,800 linear km of 2D seismic survey and 1,700 square kilometers of 3D seismic survey were carried out. Two new deposits with reserves of B1C1+B2C2 of 1.1 million TOE were discovered.
The technological development of the Company in terms of improving the efficiency of geological exploration work concerns not only field seismic surveys, but also methods of their interpretation. As a result of a comprehensive analysis of geological and geophysical materials, a methodology was developed to forecast the areas of development of improved reservoirs in the formations, timed to the protrusions of the foundation and rift structures in the Osinsky formation. Application of modern high-tech approaches to the interpretation of geological and geophysical data (seismic inversion, calculation of seismic attributes, comprehensive analysis of results) and improvement of the geological concept has led to a great success in geological exploration.
Central Russia, Timan-Pechora and the South of Russia
In 2018, the total incremental reserves in the Volga-Ural region, Timan-Pechora and in the south of Russia amounted to 67.9 million tons of oil and condensate and 7.9 billion cubic meters of gas. 79 wells were completed with a success rate of 84%. A significant volume of 3D Common Depth Point Method seismic work was performed: 4,600 square kilometers and 68 linear kilometers of 2D. The Company discovered 21 fields and 152 new deposits with total reserves of B1C1+B2C2 of all discoveries of 55.4 million tons of oil equivalent.
In the south of the Russian Federation, the Company continues to perform systematic geological surveying to replenish the region's resource base. In 2018, 68 linear kilometers of 2D seismic work was carried out, and 1 well was tested in the Russian oldest oil and gas producing region in the Republic of Dagestan. In order to search for prospective sites in the conditions of complex geology, deep depths, high density of infrastructure and agriculture, modern technologies of 2D seismic exploration and processing of field materials were applied. Based on the results of the work, the most promising structure was determined at the Zapadno-Izberbashsky license area, where drilling of the well was recommended.
The result of drilling Zapadno-Izberbashskaya well No.1 confirmed the possibilities of new discoveries in old oil and gas producing regions. Currently, the Company continues its exploration work in the Republic of Dagestan within the Karlanyurtovsky, Karatubinsky, Karabudakhentsky and Dimitrovskiy license areas; analysis of the undistributed fund of subsurface resources for the purpose of further licensing is underway.


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Cut a bamboo mat into a smaller sized piece to produce bamboo rugs out of it. These rugs is often produced in distinct shapes like circles and semicircles; they look actually nice. Put them outside your key door or outdoors your washrooms.
Table Mats
You can use bamboo to produce table mats. With just a single massive mat of bamboo, you may approximately make eight table mats. Also, in case you are excellent at painting you can add some theme to it, employing colors. Bamboo table mats look classic!
You are able to make tea and coffee coasters having a bamboo mat. It is possible to make a lot of them with just one particular mat. Also use colors to make them desirable and appealing. You make a style on them or simply give them a border.
Bamboo Finished Pillow Covers
On a pillow cover it is possible to stitch a square patch either on the entire front or maybe a big part on the center on the pillow cover. You can use these pillow covers inside your lower sitting areas or for an outside seating arrangement. You may match it with a bamboo mat as a flooring.
Bamboo Screens
You could use a bamboo mat to produce a screen. You are going to need to have about 3-4 mats according to the location you wish to cover. They look seriously nice as a partition in your drawing area and even surrounding your lawn or in your pool region.
You'll be able to make cool bamboo-bags just like paper bags, utilizing bamboo mats. They look cool and are sturdy also. Carry them with you to markets or you could even use it as present bags.
Roofing/ Thatches
When you have seating area within your garden/ lawn you are able to give it a roof utilizing bamboo mats. You could possibly also use bamboo sticks as a scaffolding in case you don't possess a base ready.
Plant Decoration
You'll be able to use bamboo mats for plant decoration. You can retain your pots on bamboo pot-mats. Wood plus the gardening area's mixture looks pretty appealing. Also to add the wooden really feel you can make an artificial bird nest and hang it inside your garden or above your pots.
You may make a lantern having a bamboo mat. This is once again for any balcony or even a garden/terrace; an region exactly where it is typically dark. Make use of the lantern by placing a candle or fit within a yellow bulb and get pleasure from the meshed impact. It appears absolutely pleasant!
You may make baskets out of a bamboo mat and use it to retailer fruits and vegetables.
Bamboo curtains! I'm confident we all have seen them. They are able to be applied as a contrast at your office and at house. Add some funky danglers created of crystals or beads and hang them in your curtains to add glamor to it.
It is possible to use bamboo mats to produce a fence about your garden. Take assist of the family, use a Sunday and get the fencing done. You might colour it for those who want.
Bamboo Trail
I've seen bamboo trails made use of in forest tracks and in slippery places. You can use bamboo flooring on stairways and as a trailing inside your garden.
Automobile Seat
Applying bamboo mats on your seat covers can also be a cool thought. You can use it within a comparable way, as talked about in the case of pillow covers.
You'll be able to make earrings, neck-pieces and bracelets out of a bamboo mat. You can't use them day-to-day however they is usually fantastic for any Hawaiian theme or even a tribal theme party.
Wall Hangings
This can be based on me a place exactly where, a bamboo mat is usually used extensively. Colour it, give it a theme or perhaps use it as a photo frame and hang it within your bedroom and drawing room walls.
You are able to use bamboo mats to produce modest or massive photo-frames. Preserve them on your study table or present it to your mates, adding a picture in the each of you. It'll be particular for the reason that you made it your self.
Aren't there far more creative utilizes of bamboo mats than what you had thought? Try them, add your creativity and ability to it and you may use it to decorate your house, cars, gardens, and so forth. Good luck!
Inventive Makes use of of a Bamboo Mat
Cut a bamboo mat into a smaller sized piece to produce bamboo rugs out of it. These rugs is often produced in distinct shapes like circles and semicircles; they look actually nice. Put them outside your key door or outdoors your washrooms.


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by Joan
Guns N' Roses Slash Costume
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Jacob Miller
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|Costumes for Boys
This homemade costume for boys entered our 2013 Halloween Costume Contest.
A word from Amber, the 'Guns N' Roses Slash' costume creator:
Jacob is 4 years old and wanted to be Slash (from guns n roses) this year for Halloween. His dad is a huge guns n roses fan and put a lot of time and thought into making Jacob's costume GREAT!
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Last May Prince Albert II of Monaco won the bid on the first limited edition print of Karen Bystedt's "The Lost Warhols" (www.KarenBystedt.com) collection at the Amber Lounge Grand Prix Charity Fashion Event. The winning bid came in at 32,000 Euros (over $40,000 USD). Bystedt's photographs, taken at "The Factory" in New York when she was 19 years old, are some of the most unique images ever captured of the famous pop artist.
In 1982, Bystedt was a film and photography student at NYU. After seeing pop art icon Andy Warholin a Barney's ad, she envisioned him as the ultimate male model and decided she wanted to photograph him. On a whim, Bystedt called Andy Warhol's office, known as "The Factory", and to her surprise, Andy himself picked up the phone. She told him about a book she was working on featuring the top male models in America, which she subsequently published, called "Not Just Another Pretty Face" (Plume/1983). After hearing about some of the famous male models she had in her roster, Andy was flattered and agreed to be pose for her. Andy's secret desire was to be a model. Bystedt captured Warhol as he had never been seen before, posing for the camera and becoming the subject rather than the creator. Along with her photo session, she sat down with Andy for a candid interview where they discussed everything from fashion and politics, to Andy's personal hopes, dreams, and icons. Commenting on the state of the world, Warhol told Bystedt, "In this country right now, since there's no war on, everybody's a beauty. It's really scary. They're here because they are not in the army."
Bystedt kept her Andy Warhol photographs hidden from the world until now. Their sensational debut and the acquisition of one of the first of her rare prints by The Prince of Monaco has set the stage for collectors and fans of Andy Warhol all over the world. Bystedt is offering 44″ x 44″ limited edition prints and 24″ x 24″ box sets of "The Lost Warhols" that include ten unique prints as well as a proof sheet and quote sheets from her interview with Andy.
Visit www.KarenBystedt.com to view "The Lost Warhols" Collection.
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About Karen Bystedt:
Karen Bystedt is a photographer and author based in Los Angeles. What sets Bystedt apart from other celebrity photographers is her unique ability to see stars before they have risen, roles before they have been played, and to support those manifesting their dreams. In 1993, Bystedt published "Before They Were Famous", a collection of intimate photographs and candid interviews with actors such as Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp, Sandra Bullock, Robert Downey Jr., Courtney Cox, Lawrence Fishburne, Laura Dern, Patrick Dempsey and many more. She continues to work in print, editorial and advertising in Los Angeles.
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I'm so grateful to Karen Bystedt for givin' permission to publish her two images. The framed image is the one bought by Prince Albert at the Amber Lounge event. Thank you so much Karen! R.A.


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We welcome Dr. Haideh Moghissi to IUP on March 3 and 4!
Her colloquium topic will be "Closed Passages: Muslim Women, Islamism, Feminism."
Haideh Moghissi, is a professor of sociology, cross-appointed in the School of Social Sciences, in the Atkinson Faculty of Liberal and Professional Studies, York's School of Women's Studies and the Faculty of Graduate Studies.
She is also a member of the executive committee of the Centre for Refugee Studies.
Dr. Moghissi was a founder of the Iranian National Union of Women and member of its first executive and editorial boards, before leaving Iran in 1984.
Her publications include articles in refereed journals and chapters in edited volumes and following books: Three-volume Women and Islam: Critical Concepts in Sociology (ed.) London: Routledge (2005); Feminism and Islamic Fundamentalism: The Limits of Postmodern Analysis, London: Oxford University Press 2000 (Zed Press, 1999, winner of Choice Outstanding Academic Book Award); and Populism and Feminism in Iran: Women's Struggle in a Male-Defined Revolutionary Movement, London: Macmillan Press; New York: St.Martin's Press (1994). She has served as coordinator of Certificate for Anti-Racist Research and Practice (CARRP) and chair of the Executive Committee of Centre for Feminist Research at York University. She has served as a commentator on Iran and women in the Middle East on BBC World Service, CBC, Radio France, and Voice of America, and on the Editorial/Advisory Boards of Journal of Comparative Public Policy, the Rutledge Women and Politics Series, Resources for Feminist Research , and Women in Struggle and Equality (Tehran). As head of Old Manuscripts Division, National Archives of Iran, she was responsible for the evaluation and classification of historical documents.
Haideh Moghissi was a founder of the Iranian National Union of Women and a member of its first executive and editorial boards before leaving Iran in 1984. She teaches sociology and women's studies at York University in Toronto. Her Feminism and Islamic Fundamentalism: The Limits of Postmodern Analysis (London: Zed Books, 1999) was awarded the Year 2000 Choice Outstanding Academic Books Award in Sociology.


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AUD/JPY Trading on August 16, 2013: 3/3 ITM
I decided to conclude my week with some more AUD/JPY trading on Markets World.
The only price level I had immediately in play was the daily pivot level (purple line) at 89.258. If you've read my blog for some amount of time, you'll see that daily pivot point trades are a set-up that I like to take frequently, especially when the market moves to that level for the first time in the trading day.
The market made its first move down to the 89.258 pivot point on the 1:20 (AM EST) candlestick, fell through by a couple pips, before coming back up and closing above the level. This, in a price-action sense, is a sign of rejection for me and helps to validate the area as a level worth trading. In this case, the pivot had successfully held as support, so I took a call option on the re-touch of 89.258 on the 1:25 candle. Being I was trading with Markets World for today's trades, expiries are 5-10 minutes in length, which led to this trade closing on the following candle.
This turned out to be a good trade and won by over six pips. The one thing I like about the AUD/JPY is that it's almost always moving at a pretty steady clip. Obviously it gets a pretty good boost during the Asian and Australian market hours – the two market economies relevant to the currencies in the pair – and then once the European and U.S. trading world comes into play, it continues on at a strong pace.
The market for the rest of the day was interesting. There really wasn't so much a trend to speak of, and various support and resistance levels formed, but their robustness wasn't as good as I would have preferred. If I was being super, super picky I probably wouldn't have traded anymore that day. But I was able to find set-ups that I felt would be worth taking and had a good probability of working out. The goal, of course, is never to find perfect set-ups, but rather set-ups that have a high probability of working out in favor.
I did not want to trade the 89.397 resistance level (although I had the chance) due to the false breaks that had occurred on the price level's formation. As you may have heard me say before, false breaks always serve as a warning that price may be likely to breach a support or resistance level in the future.
But I did feel confident in trading the 89.337 support level six pips below it. The market had a slight bias for sustaining an uptrend for over the past hour and the two re-touches of 89.337 had held well on the 3:15 and 3:25 candles. So I decided to take a call option on the re-touch of 89.337 on the 3:30 candle. This trade went against me right off the bat but eventually settled in between the recent six-pip trading range (89.337-89.397) for a four-pip winner.
Two further price levels I decided to mark off going forward were at 89.423 and 89.457, which served as resistance. I did not consider any price levels as support for potential call option set-ups between 89.337 and the daily pivot at 89.258. If the market ever happens to form support or resistance a few pips away from a daily pivot point or an important Fibonacci retracement level (i.e., drawn from price moves on the higher time compressions), it's usually only a temporary bounce before it will actually hit the level.
I also did not take anymore pivot trades for the day. I was mainly wary of the breach of the pivot that had occurred earlier in the morning and felt that it could possibly happen again and maybe even sustain a downtrend. But the market eventually decided to stay above the pivot level.
I did have 89.423 considered for put options, but nothing cleanly set-up there, so I began targeting up at 89.457 instead, which was around the day's current high. Sure enough, I was able to find one final trade for the day at the 89.457 level. Price touched it on the 7:15 candle and rejected it. It skipped a touch on the following candle, but I was able to get into the put option on the 7:25 candle and was able to get a winner of just over two pips.
That was it for the day. I spent just Thursday and Friday trading standard binaries from the five-minute chart, but was able to finish a solid 6/7 ITM over those two days on a completely different pair (AUD/JPY).
Next week, I'll likely go back to my USD/CHF trading on Trade Rush, but I'd also like to include another day of trading 60-second options. I've also thought about doing some gold futures binary trading, as well. I did some metals trading in the past because the payouts were very good at Markets World, and it still seems to hold true even under the variable payout structure they presently employ. Plus, I do enjoy mixing things up a bit on occasion. However, for traders just starting out, I do recommend sticking with trading the same asset every day to really learn its general behavior. There is something to be said for having that sense of stability in your trading regimen and trading the same asset can be a very important part of that.


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In loving Memory of my Treasured Friend
In loving and most treasured memory of the most loyal Friend and Companion I have ever know. I love and miss you so very much. Please forgive me. You will never be out of my heart.
January 30th, 2007 – February 27th, 2011
My dog and best canine friend died February 27th, 2011. I just found out today. He was under the care of someone I loved and trusted. They didn't know how to tell me, so for nearly 3 months he's been gone without my knowing. I assumed he was safe.
Its my fault he died. He was run over and left to die alone. I'm told he didn't suffer. I know he was happy where he was at. I got to see him just a few days before. He didn't know me at first but before I left he had his head in my lap as I petted him. He remembered me.
I wonder if he remembered how happy I was when he was given to me as a present by my then Girlfriend. He was just a little ball of fluffy snow back then. I wonder if he remembered how I saved his life by plucking over 80 ticks off his little body when I got him home. His breeders had not taken care of him.
I wonder if he remembered running around and playing. I wonder if he remembers trying to rape the male cats every chance he got. I wonder if he remembers jumping into bed with me while I held him close when my marriage ended and couldn't stand to be alone. He laid there, loyal, loving and faithful as always.
But what I wonder most is if he remembered me abandoning him. I wonder what his days were like when I was forced to leave for Washington because I had no choice and left him behind. I wonder if he remembered my betrayal.
What he didn't know is how many times I tried to get money up to fly him to Washington. What he didn't know is how many nights I cried over missing him. What he never knew was how badly I needed him. I wonder if he needed me as much as I needed him.
Now, knowing he's been gone for so long I wonder if he saw me cry for him today. I wonder if he heard my wails as tears fell like cold, hard rain in the dark of fall. I wonder if he finally saw that I had never wanted to leave him. I loved him…love him.
I held his collar for so long and so tight I hurt my hand. I wonder if he is watching me as some say the spirits of dogs will do for their Masters\Mistress's.
I doubt it. Why would he? He didn't know why I had to leave, he only knew I left. I failed him. God forgive me. Though I know he lived his life free, running with the wind and sleeping under the stars, having plenty of food and water, I still would have liked to watch him sleep one last time.
He is the second dog I have betrayed. The first I allowed my mother to put to sleep when my dad died because we had no place for him. He was my dog and then Dad took him to MN so he would have company. They loved each other and I saw him often when I visited. I should have done something, said something more, cried out for mercy and begged for his 13 year old life to be spared. Mom believed this was better for him. I had no control. No Rights. I watched him go to sleep and I wonder to this day if his last thoughts on this earth were "Why?" or "What did I do wrong?"
Muru was buried by a neighbor whom he hung out with a lot down around Lawrenceburg. I was not asked if I wanted to bury. I was not allowed to pay final respects. I know this will haunt me for years to come. I never got closure.
Though Muru is gone I know he was happy and loved. I'm so sorry I failed again. 4 years is not enough life. Muru, I love you so much. Thank you for all you did for me; for the laughs and joy and the shoulder when I had none. Surely if not all dogs go to heaven, this one will. Goodbye Muru. I'm so so sorry.
Rest peacefully in open fields under cool, blue skies and piles of fresh snow to play in. Jesus, if dogs do go to heaven, please tell him he's a good boy for me and he took care of me well. He was your gift to me and you were right to take him back. I hope he's waiting for me when I pass on, right beside you, O' Lord.
Love forever and for always my little "small pile of fresh snow"
Livia Daniels


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Here are the steps to making the tuba. I start with the freezer paper patterns.
The fronts (right sides) of the prepared pieces...
I kept the freezer paper on some of the pieces until I was through glue basting (I had to wait until I peeled the paper off to glue baste the mouthpiece end of the tubing). I couldn't leave the paper on the pieces that were to the back...they would have been in the way of the gluing!
Because I want to be able to trim the background away behind the peacock later (to help with the hand-quilting later), I build the tail in sections. After glue basting the purple spots to the yellow pieces, I hand appliqued the purple spots. Then I put those units on the green feather units (not shown), and hand appliqued them in place. I basically construct the whole peacock off block before making the final placement. That way I only have to stitch around the outside of the bird once it is finally placed on the background, overlapping the tuba.
In stitches,
Teresa :o)


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We know you have a choice when selecting a vaccine group purchasing organization and we believe CPP is the right choice for all vaccine providers.


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Baby shower invitation ideas
The party starts with the baby shower invitation ideas.
A truly beautiful, magical day begins with a beautifully designed invitation. And this holiday begins long before the date specified in the invitation. You will enjoy the hassle of preparing for the celebration. The holidays are over, the guests go home, and only the original postcard will remind about the past holiday. The invitation will serve as a memory of this wonderful event.
The invitation for a child's birthday is a great idea.
Usually the preparation for the birthday is begun in advance. It depends on the complexity of celebration. Someone can spend a few days, and someone can spend some months. The birthday of a child will not be an exception of the general rule. Do not repeat the mistakes of others and start preparing for the holiday with the shopping list. Naturally, this is a necessary step, but it should be done much later.
First, choose some baby shower invitation ideas. Invitations will determine the format of the holiday, to set the tone. Take your time, it's a nice care. Starting the preparations for the celebration and thinking of baby invitations, you will plunge headlong into a children's holiday. Don't be lazy – Birthday is celebrated once a year. Do everything that will make the occasion memorable for your child for a long time.
Children are always very pleased with the invitations. You can develop the template invitation to the celebration yourself, you can spy on the Internet or turn into a specialized agency, where professional designers will do the layout of the cards, which will meet the concept of a children's party.
So there are some examples of baby shower invitation ideas for you to choose.
The birthday invitation in the summer should be an invitation designed in light summer style. It can be decorated with volumetric elements symbolizing summer. Colorful invitations should be bright and individually decorated, suitable for both boys and girls. It is perfectly good for a holiday that is held outdoors, in the woods, in the country in summer.
The invitation in the style of Madagascar. The style of this invitation is funny Zebra and penguins, the colorful cartoon king and the lion from Madagascar. The heroes of this cartoon delight the children.
Postcard with Smeshariki will gladden your children as well. This style of invitation is particularly helpful for boys. The style of the cards will set the tone and will help spend a wonderful holiday in a circle of best friends with Smeshariki.
The postcard with fun Mickey mouse will prepare your guests for an exciting immersion into the world of Disney. Select the appropriate text and make cards, and the good humor of the guests will be provided.
Another beautiful design of the modern birthday may become a theme of the Ice age. Funny animals of this cartoon will help children relax and have fun. Postcards of this theme are very bright and complement the day .
There are a great number of baby shower invitation ideas. Select, arrange the celebration and the reward for you will be the joy of your child.


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DOHA, Qatar — Along a skyline that feels as ambitious as it is ephemeral, there is a building named for its design — the Tornado. The renowned architect I. M. Pei built a museum here in a quest for the essence of Islamic architecture. Another tower, built by another famous architect, is sheathed in an exoskeleton and suggests a Saracen helmet.
"It's a mimic of a city that could have been built anywhere," an unimpressed Issa al-Mohannadi, an engineer who has been asked to create something different, declared as he gazed out his fourth-floor window. "What you're seeing shouldn't be our future."
Doha is many things: a former backwater on the Persian Gulf that at one time had a pearling boat for every 350 residents; the capital of a country with enough natural gas to make those same people the wealthiest in the world today; and the seat of an emir determined to put his country on the map with brash foreign policy and the power of Al Jazeera, the satellite television news channel. It is also a city in search of an identity that still feels as shapeless as the tracts of sand interspersed between domed skyscrapers and the most improbable geometry.
The debate, of course, is not new. All the emerald cities on the Persian Gulf have to varying degrees struggled with tradition and modernity, as oil and gas created what a Qatari official called "Earth on Mars." But nowhere else is the debate so pronounced, driven by so many billions of dollars, cluttered with so many visions and punctuated by so much criticism over what Doha, in some ways an accidental creation of a city, should look like.
Here is what it offers: a film festival, the World Cup in 2022, a new airport, a metro system and a Coffee Beanery with a menu in English, Arabic, Korean and Japanese. Here is what it lacks: an urban fabric, in a place where citizens are a tiny minority and legions of foreign workers toil in bleak conditions.
In the growing debate here, drawing in everyone from the emir's wife to Qatar's lone comedian, the question most often asked is whether a sense of the cosmopolitan can reflect the skyline and transcend the rootless globalism and commercialism that have so long stood as the Persian Gulf's grasp at modernity.
Dubai, shimmering like a mirage, never had the money. Saudi Arabia, with a conservatism born of a Bedouin sense of life's caprice, never had the ambition.
Doha now has both, and a determination to will a world capital into existence. "There is depth to the vision," said Salman Shaikh, director of the Brookings Doha Center.
Abdul Aziz al-Mahmoud is a rarity in Qatar — a novelist whose book has become a best seller, by standards here, since it was published last month. Set in the 19th century, the novel delves into the struggle between the British and littoral tribes that inhabited the Persian Gulf. Three years in the works, the book fills a gap, he said, in perceptions.
"The region didn't appear from nowhere because of oil," he said in an interview. "People lived here; they had their troubles and their happiness. We were not oil. Oil came to change our lives, but people were always here."
Testaments to that history feel like oases in a city of more than a million that numbered just 12,000 a century or so ago. Suq Waqif is one of them. Once a labyrinthine seaside market where Qataris traded fish and goats, the market was abandoned, then left to crumble. Five years ago it was rebuilt with a faithfulness to detail that recreated even its shoddiness. Exposed timber and reed roofs look worn and white-washed walls antique, even though they are not. Hawking everything from SpongeBob sandals to ceremonial Syrian swords, the shops are like the country: owned by Qataris and run by South Asians.
Mr. Mahmoud said he would take friends from abroad there to see a representation of the essence of a bygone culture, but he would not normally visit the suq.
"It's about a sense of belonging," Mr. Mahmoud said. "Qataris go there occasionally, but it's not where they go and socialize and interact, no."
Qataris number just 225,000 of a population of 1.8 million, and interaction between them and the rest feels as lifeless as the miles of plastic grass that line the boulevards in Education City. Mr. Mahmoud describes it as a "hidden enmity," where Qataris feel comfortable not at the Islamic Museum or Jean Nouvel's latest addition to the skyline, but rather in a majlis, one of the traditional segregated salons that stand as a fixture of social life.
"It's like fragmented, divided communities," he said. "They don't talk to each other. Somehow we have to design a melting pot to make them all feel at home."
Mohammed Kamal has wrestled with that question of a sophisticated city. Imbued with an earnestness that belies his self-declared standing as Qatar's lone comedian, he believes humor can create "openness and confidence" in culture. Confidence, he suggests, is the foundation of cosmopolitanism.
"I want our culture to be O.K. with laughing at ourselves," he said "It's better to laugh at ourselves then wait for someone from outside to make jokes and laugh about us."
His task is not easy. The police told him that religion, sex and politics were off limits. "What else is stand-up comedy?" he asked. A Qatari woman threatened to hurl her shoe at him when he imagined a pampered Qatari woman working as a flight attendant. Sometimes his bite goes too far, as when he scolded Qatari men for threatening to revoke the visas of expatriates any time an argument erupted. But he managed to stage a comedy show in February, and it drew 1,200 people — Qataris in front, expatriates in back.
Not even Dubai, a city built on success in marketing an image, feels as self-conscious as Doha. Banners read "Rediscover the essence of our community" near a cultural village named Katara, with sparsely peopled offices for the Qatar Fine Arts Society, Qatar Photographic Society, Qatar Music Academy and Doha Film Institute. Buses bear ads that read "From Qatar to a Greener World" — this in a city built on exploiting one of the world's largest gas fields. Museums compete with any in the world, and Education City has attracted branches of six American universities.
"I think they are hoping that with time, all this will be a big component of the Qataris' or the nationals' lives," said Seif Salmawy, managing director of Bloomsbury in Qatar, which is seeking to make the country a publishing force in English and Arabic in the Middle East. "As it stands, I think it has little to do with their actual lives."
His colleague Andy Smart added, "You need a city center for an urban life."


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We're at the time of year that final-year students have now essentially finished and submitted their applications and are waiting for, or receiving offers; but even so they ought to have something to bear in mind going forward – though the careers programme's attention will shortly shift to younger students. So if you're in year 11 or 12, looking forward from GCSE or A-level, this is mostly for you, although 13s will find it useful too.
People underestimate how common dropping out of degree courses is (about one-fifth, by some measures) – usually in the first year. The result is a year of lost time, a feeling of despondency at your mistake and at the fact you now have no careers advice and support to draw on – and a massive load of extra unnecessary debt. This is why careers advisors try so hard to get people to think early, compare in depth, visit universities and apply broadly – you can't get this decision wrong. Still, if you do choose a degree you hate, here's some thoughts. If you're in year 11 or 12, start planning ahead to avoid being in that situation.
And you need a degree. 41% of the UK workforce now have one, a huge leap from 26% in 2000. That increasing competition probably explains the upward pressure on university offers at all levels, the most prominent and high-profile of which is that Oxbridge now looks like A*A*A will become the normal minimum; but the same ever-higher-bar will apply to each tier below in turn, with everyone shifting up one. There are AAB minimum entry demands as far down as 40th on some league tables for 2015.
It's not just grades; cost too might be more of a criterion than you think. Those nine-thousand fees per annum (more likely twelve to twenty if you don't get UK home status, which is becoming more likely) need to be added to high rent costs, living costs and horrific RPI + 2% interest lifelong, so a four-year degree and Masters (very common now) might leave you over a hundred thousand pounds in debt in practice. So the different cost of living of different universities might make a surprising difference in your calculations.
Alternatively, you might just want to be where it's at right now, regardless of cost. After all, if the UK is going to charge you international fees, why give it preference over any other country's universities? I'd strongly encourage students to be more global and make applications across multiple countries: here's a list of the best ten student cities in the world. Of course, British students might have to overcome their traditional xenophobic antipathy towards languages – do the reasons to value languages from this survey chime with your assessments of the interests and value of languages? An example of a private company supporting international applications is http://www.astarfuture.co.uk (though we're not endorsing that, just advising you shop around these kind of companies.)
One traditional and in-demand subject which is actually not very international is law, due to the distinct differences in legal procedure in different jurisdictions; but even here technological advancement is sharply changing the nature of employment for graduates – so be mindful and think ahead. One important development in recent years is MOOCs (for all subjects) and students ought to be taking these now of their own volition before applying to university and referencing them on their personal statements.
Technology's not always good, of course, despite our tendency to glamorise the new, and strong applicants to good universities must realise that some old-fashioned skills (written practice, detailed notes, systematic wider reading, silent study) are irreplaceable to at least some degree by trendier modern methods that use quizes, group work, IT-for-everything and discovery learning; there's been a bit of a backlash here. Read carefully and be discerning (don't take a strong position either way or jump to conclusions) but it's worth reading this critical study by top education researchers the Sutton Trust; also, take care of this self-promoting author, but some of these points are valid. Perhaps this continued core of traditionalist practices reflects the news that private school students do better than equivalent-scoring state schools students. The Telegraph's conclusions are heavy-handed and political but it's an interesting read; I would argue that this is caused by the opportunities for leadership, broader curriculum, and context that enhances these students' readiness for university as well as more traditional methods of teaching perhaps common in those contexts.
Finally, locally – good luck to our year 8s, going on work shadowing the week after next – what a great way to prepare for a future jobs market! And if you're in year 11 or 12 and really aren't sure about universities at all, contact our partner school JBS to request attending their careers fair on Sunday 14th December (you'll need to get permission to miss lessons that day, of course.)


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Our bylaws are available here. Click or tap here to join our email list and receive important announcements about programs and activities.
The CSU Social Science Research and Instructional Center
The California State University Social Science Research and Instructional Center (SSRIC) provides:
- Support for CSU student, faculty, and staff users of subscription data bases from the Inter-university Consortium for Political and Social Research (ICPSR), the Field Poll, and the Roper Center, as well as of unrestricted data bases.
- Workshops on use of these data, as well as on SPSS, SDA, GIS, and other topics as needed. Provided at no cost to CSU campuses. Other institutions: please contact us for more information.
- The annual SSRIC Social Science Student Symposium (S4). Open to undergraduate and graduate students at CSU and to students at California community colleges.
- Research and training opportunities through CALSPEAKS and the ICPSR Summer Training Program.
- Value-added teaching resources, including modules and exercises, and online textbooks. Most of these materials are freely available.
Overseeing the Center is the Social Science Research and Instructional Council (also called the SSRIC). Founded in 1972, the Council is the oldest of the affinity groups (formerly known as "discipline councils") in the California State University system. With representatives from each of the CSU campuses, the Council is dedicated to assisting students and faculty in their learning, teaching, and research by:
- providing a forum for sharing information about social science data and computer products;
- initiating and conducting training programs;
- recommending computerized social science projects in the CSU curriculum;
- encouraging the collection and distribution of social science data and computer-related instructional and research materials; and
- advising CSU administrators on policies related to providing quantitative social science data for research and instruction.
Last updated: July 10, 2017.


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Places to Visit near Devon Cliffs
Exmouth - The Perfect Family Holiday Resort
See some of the local area on this video.
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In line with current government guidelines and restrictions, parks are separately announcing their closure plans, and when they hope to re-open. Please click the relevant tab below to see how a particular park closure affects your up-coming booking.
Devon Cliffs is closed up to and including Saturday 4th July 2020.
Brean Sands Holiday Resort Unity is closed up to and including Friday 3rd July 2020.
Ladram Bay is closed up to and including Sunday 5th July 2020.
Dawlish Sands is closed up to and including Friday 3rd July 2020.
Golden Sands is closed up to and including Friday 3rd July 2020.
We understand how disappointing and worrying this must be, but please be assured that you will not lose that all important family holiday through this uncertain time.
Therefore, we will be offering the following options for affected bookings.
Our team have been working hard to reschedule affected holidays and wish to thank everyone for their support and patience during these difficult times.
To enable us to streamline the rescheduling process we are channelling ALL enquiries and communications through email until further notice.
General enquiries: email@example.com
We do ask for your patience in expected responses, as our team count has been reduced due to furlough leave, self-isolation and home working environments.
For bookings affected by the closure dates we want to give you total flexibility. If you are able to choose new dates at this time, please click the button below to request arranging your new holiday dates.
Understanding that it may be difficult to confirm future dates at this time, a credit of the total amount paid will be available to use on any future holiday booked with Newmans Holiday Homes up until the end of the 2021 holiday season
If you currently have an Easy Payment Plan with us, these payments will commence again with from 1st July 2020.
For all other arrivals final balances will be taken 8 weeks prior to your holiday arrival date as per our terms and conditions.
However, we do understand that peoples circumstances may have changed. If you do have any problems, or wish to discuss your individual plans, please do not hesitate to email us at email@example.com
We know this this is a very difficult time for everyone. We are doing all we can to adapt to these rapidly changing and challenging times and we are very grateful for your patience and understanding. Please continue to observe the guidelines set out by the Government in remaining safe and well. We very much look forward to seeing you when the parks are open and fully operational.
For the latest government information please check the following websites:
or, for the latest NHS information and guidelines, check this NHS page:
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Jean-Sébastien has spent years at both legendary Parisian restaurant Lasserre and the (Paris/London) Ritz and He has now been working at L'atelier des Chefs for 4 years. He's keen to share his passion for food with all would-be-cooks, not just fancy diners His cooking style is either traditional and original.Book a cooking class
Tell us a little about your experience as a chef
What attracted you to teaching?
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The largest earthquake to ever hit Japan. Tsunami waves of up to 10 metres sweep away homes and vehicles. Shaking in Tokyo, major fire in Chiba and explosion at Fukushima nuclear power plant, radiation leaked from a damaged reactor after an explosion blew the roof off. 210,000 people living near the nuclear reactors were evacuated
At least 15,703 people killed, 4,647 missing, 5,314 injured
Damage Estimates
14 trillion yen ($NZ233billion) ~ estimated cost of the earthquake and tsunami by Credit Suisse
111,944 ~ homes destroyed (Japan Fire Dept updated 04.08.2011)
139,870 ~ homes partially destroyed (JFD)
2 mllion ~ homes without power
1.4 million ~ homes with no running water
4 metres ~ distance Honshu (and perhaps the whole of Japan) moved east
20 metres ~ the distance the Pacific Plate moved west
16.5cm ~ the distance the earth moved off its axis, due to a redistribution of its mass
1.8 millionths of a second ~ cut off a day due to the earth spinning faster as a result of the planets redistribution of mass
JMA Observations Issued at 08:02JST 13 Mar 2011,
Max. Height: Soma, 7.3m or more; Oarai, 4.2m; Kamaishi, 4.1m or more; Miyako, 4.0m or more; Erimo-cho Shoya, 3.5m; Ishinomaki-shi Ayukawa, 3.3m or more; Ofunato, 3.2m or more; Mutsu-shi Sekinehama, 2.9m; Tokachi-ko , 2.8m or more; Nemuro-shi Hanasaki, 2.8m; Hachinohe, 2.7m or more; Urakawa, 2.7m; Hamanaka-cho Kiritappu-ko and Susaki-ko, 2.6m; Tomakomai-higashiko , 2.5m or more; Choshi, and Hakodate, 2.4m; Kushiro and Tomakomai-nishiko , 2.1m; Chichijima Futami, Oshima Mori-ko, Shiraoi-ko and Toba, 1.8m; Owase, 1.7m; Miyazaki-ko, Tahara-shi Akabane, Tateyama-shi Mera, Yokohama and Yokosuka, 1.6m;Tanegashima Kumano, 1.5m; Achijojima Yaene, Kushimoto-cho Fukuro-ko, Numazu-shi Uchiura and Omaezaki, 1.4m; Nachi-katsuura-cho Uragami, Tokyo Harumi, and Tosa-shimizu, 1.3m; Amami-shi Kominato and Hachijojima Kaminato, 1.2m; Gobo-shi Haraido, Nichinan-shi Aburatsu, and Shibushi-ko and Tokushima Yuki, 1.1m; Muroran-ko, Nagoya and Shirahama-cho Katata, 1.0m
Seismic Intensity (Regions)
JMA 7 (MM10 -12) Miyagi-ken Hokubu
JMA 6+ (MM10) Miyagi-ken Nambu, Miyagi-ken Chubu, Fukushima-ken Nakadori, Fukushima-ken Hamadori, Ibaraki-ken Hokubu, Ibaraki-ken Nambu, Tochigi-ken Hokubu, Tochigi-ken Nambu
JMA 6- (MM 9) Iwate-ken Engan-nambu, Iwate-ken Nairiku-hokubu, Iwate-ken Nairiku-nambu, Fukushima-ken Aizu, Gumma-ken Nambu, Saitama-ken Nambu Chiba-ken Hokuseibu
JMA 5+ (MM8) Aomori-ken Sampachi-Kamikita, Iwate-ken Engan-hokubu, Akita-ken Engan-nambu, Akita-ken Nairiku-nambu, Yamagata-ken Murayama, Yamagata-ken Okitama, Gumma-ken Hokubu, Saitama-ken Hokubu, Chiba-ken Hokutobu, Chiba-ken Nambu, Tokyo-to Nijusan-ku, Niijima-Kozushima, Kanagawa-ken Tobu, Yamanashi-ken Tobu-Fujigoko, Yamanashi-ken Chuseibu
JMA 5- (MM7) Akita-ken Engan-hokubu, Yamagata-ken Shonai, Yamagata-ken Mogami, Saitama-ken Chichibu, Tokyo-to Tama-tobu, Kanagawa-ken Seibu, Niigata-ken Chuetsu, Nagano-ken Chubu , hizuoka-ken Tobu,
JMA 4 (MM6) Ishikari-chiho Hokubu, Ishikari-chiho Nambu, Oshima-chiho Tobu, Oshima-chiho Seibu, Hiyama-chiho, Sorachi-chiho Nambu, Kamikawa-chiho Nambu, Iburi-chiho Chutobu, Hidaka-chiho Chubu, Hidaka-chiho Tobu, Tokachi-chiho Hokubu, Tokachi-chiho Chubu, Tokachi-chiho Nambu, Kushiro-chiho Chunambu, Aomori-ken Tsugaru-hokubu, Aomori-ken Tsugaru-nambu, Aomori-ken Shimokita, Akita-ken Nairiku-hokubu, Tokyo-to Tama-seibu, Kozushima, Niigata-ken Joetsu, Niigata-ken Kaetsu, Niigata-ken Sado, Nagano-ken Hokubu, Nagano-ken Nambu, Gifu-ken Mino-Chuseibu, Shizuoka-ken Izu, Shizuoka-ken Chubu, Aichi-ken Seibu
The map below shows the aftershocks recorded by NIEC/JMA from the main event at 11/03/2011 14:46:18 JST (11/03/2011 05:46:18 UTC) to the last of the day at 11/03/2011 23:57:43 JST (11/03/2011 14:57:43 UTC) a short period of 9 hours, 11 minutes
event list
mag1= 149
mag2= 138
mag3= 58
mag4= 87
mag5= 104
mag6= 29
mag7= 3
mag8= 0
mag9= 1
total= 569 events
total energy released= 485,791,877.490 TTNT of which 476,879,138.377 TTNT was the main magnitude 9.0ML quake.
Global Displacement Wavefields Graph
Understanding Global Displacement Wavefields Graphs
click on image for full size version, opens in new tab/window


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The Foundation's fundraising activities are governed by a Board of Trustees, which is made up of Old Salopians, parents, staff and Governors of the School. They meet at least twice a year.
James and his wife Bianca have two young children and live between London and West Sussex. His interests include, in addition to significant charitable involvement, a variety of sports, country pursuits and sailing (including serving as Commodore of the Old Salopian Yacht Club). He is a Vice Patron and Trustee of the Royal Navy & Royal Marines Charity, a Member of the INSEAD UK Council and a Governor of Shrewsbury School.
James holds an MBA from INSEAD in France and a BSc. (Hons.) in Systems Management (Operations Research) from City, University of London.
Jonathan Arthur (O 1970-75)
Jonathan has worked in a varied number of roles in the City over the last 22 years and within the Finance Industry for over 30. Currently he is a Director of Charles Stanley's Investment Management business.
Jonathan has been involved with the Old Salopian world for many years both as a keen OS footballer in his youth and more recently spent seven years as the Treasurer of the Salopian Club.
He is married with three daughters and still has a house on the Wirral where he spends many weekends and most holidays.
James Cross (O 1975-80)
James is a barrister at 4 Pump Court in London. He specialises in commercial disputes concerned with construction and engineering, professional negligence, property damage, insurance and product liability. He has been a QC since 2006 and has been in independent practice for over 30 years. He has been the 'Treasurer' of Chambers since 2007.
At Shrewsbury in the 'Anderson years', James was Head of School, Choregus and a 2nd VIII oarsman. He edited The Broadsheet and acted in house and school plays. He won a choral scholarship to Magdalen College Oxford, where - in addition to singing - he read law and was Captain of Boats. He combined his early years at the Bar with teaching law at Oxford.
James continues to sing regularly - with the Vasari Singers (since 1990) and at Gray's Inn, where he is also a Bencher. He has done two stints on the Old Salopian Committee, was Chairman of the Vasari Singers (1998-2002) and has been a Trustee of the Foundation since 2011.
James lives in London and is married with two sons, Robert and Hugh. Robert was also at Shrewsbury (S 2008-13).
James Dickson (M 1997-2002)
James started his professional career in the property industry in 2002 as a temporary retail agent at the London and Liverpool offices of Mason Owen Partners, a property practice specialising in agency and investment. After gaining his Masters degree, James joined Knight Frank LLP in 2007 and worked in commercial portfolio valuations and corporate real estate management. James subsequently joined Apache Capital Partners as an Assistant Fund Manager.
Andrew Haining (O 1972-1977)
Andrew has worked in the private equity and banking sectors for most his life. He now lives in Guernsey and is chairman of Aurigny, the state owned Channel Island airline, Praxis IFM, a publicly listed international trust, fiduciary and fund administration business and Heartstone Inns, a privately owned managed pub business in the south west. He sits on a number of other boards.
Andrew was in Oldham's from 1972 to 1977. He was captain of Fives and represented the School at various sports as well as contributing to many theatre productions. He went to Cambridge and graduated with an MA in Economics before pursuing his career in the city.
Andrew has been connected with the School for many years and was a Governor from 2000 to 2013, a Foundation Trustee from 1995 to 2004 and Chairman of the Foundation from 2006 to 2012.
Tim Haynes (R 1968-73)
Tim was Headmaster of Tonbridge School from 2005 to 2018 and Headmaster of Monmouth School for ten years before that, having previously been Surmaster (Deputy Head) of St Paul's School in London.
He is Chairman of the Shrewsbury School Board of Governors and is also a governor of several other independent and maintained schools.
Michael Kerr (M 1966-70)
Michael helped establish Shrewsbury School Foundation Inc. in the USA in 1993 and is the US Chairman of the Foundation. He is the Chief Executive Officer of New England Hydropower Company LLC which he founded in 2010 as the first company in the US to install the Archimedes Screw Turbine on small-scale hydropower projects. After leaving Shrewsbury, Michael was a VSO teacher in Belize, then returning to London to work for Shell, where he completed a business degree and accounting qualification (CIMA). He has over 30 years of senior management experience in industrial, commercial, energy and information technology companies gained across North and South America and Europe.
After Shell, he joined United Technologies Corporation in Belgium and was then transferred to the US, where he rose through increasingly senior financial positions in environmental testing and commercial industrial manufacturing businesses. In the early 1990s, Michael entered the IT sector and has co-founded and run as either CFO or COO four venture-backed start-ups in the technology sector in Boston and New York. In between ventures Michael also spent eight years working at Wang and Getronics, where he was President of two major divisions.
Registered Charity No. 528415


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In turn, low sunspot activity may have triggered that volcanism …
and here we go again.
"Little Ice Age began with a bang," headlines this article in Science News. "Frozen moss suggests climate cooling kicked off fast, possibly with help from volcanoes."
"The Little Ice Age, a centuries-long spell of cold summers in Europe and elsewhere, began suddenly late in the 13th century," writes journalist Devin Powell.
"A string of volcanic explosions may have set off this change in climate by belching particles that reflected sunlight and allowed Arctic sea ice to reach epic proportions."
"This cooling wasn't gradual; it was an abrupt shift," says Gifford Miller, a paleoclimatologist and geologist at the University of Colorado Boulder.
Miller's team traveled to Canada's Baffin Island where they carbon dated moss long entombed in the ice. They found "two sudden advances of the snow line that killed off the vegetation: a sudden cold spell between 1275 to 1300, followed by intensifying cold between 1430 and 1455."
Enter the volcanoes
"The second half of the 13th century had the most volcanism of any period of the past 1,500 years," says Alan Robock, an atmospheric scientist at Rutgers University.
Polar ice samples have revealed a series of eruptions, says Robock: an especially big explosion somewhere in the world in 1258, and three smaller ones in 1268, 1275 and 1284.
Bingo! Look at those dates! I've been yelling for years that a sudden increase in volcanism could drive us into an ice age almost overnight.
Now here's the proof.
Enter the sunspots
More ominously, and something that Miller and his colleagues may not have noticed, is that both periods of cooling occurred in sync with low sunspot activity.
Those two periods of low sunspot activity are known respectively as the Wolf Minimum and the Sporer Minimum.
When you get to this link, click on the graph again to make it even bigger: http://www.vukcevic.co.uk/GrandMinima.gif
Can it be that low sunspot activity triggers volcanic activity on earth? I think it does.
With sunspot activity now at a 100-year low – and forecast to go even lower – can there be any question as to where our climate is headed?
Start stockpiling that food!
See entire article:
Thanks to Steve Foster for this link


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I started this blog in the summer of 2011. I was motivated to change my lifestyle, or so I thought. Turns out I was looking for a change, yes, but focusing my efforts and attention on weight loss and body image. At the time, I was extremely unfulfilled in my relationship, stagnant career-wise, avoidant of acknowledging deeper issues affecting my self-esteem, well-being, self-awareness, and overall satisfaction in life. I hadn't wholeheartedly admitted to myself that I was depressed... So, for the sake of getting something done, I turned my dissatisfaction into action, and I started with my physical health.
A few months later, my relationship ended, but my weight loss continued and my self-esteem improved. Before taking the time to focus on the bigger task of finding myself, I jumped into a new relationship. I was flying high for awhile. A lot of self-awareness happened in those early months. I changed careers, shattered some long-held assumptions and beliefs, and opened my eyes to a lot of things I had been trying (subconsciously) not to notice about myself. This was progress, I thought.
During that time, I used this blog to document my journey from 181 pounds down to 140 lbs. I catalogued dozens of good and bad days, trying desperately to find meaning, happiness, and balance along the way. The weight stayed off, the new job brought me more fulfillment, but the depression persisted. In 2013, I fantasized about and came closer than ever before to ending my own life.
For more than a year, I kept my head above water, but my relationship and friendships suffered, my self-esteem dragged, and my mental health became my top priority. In January of 2014, I hired a life coach. We assessed my core values, which I found hugely helpful in itself as an exercise, but honestly, the work I needed to do could not be done because of one difficult truth: I didn't love myself. I didn't understand why, and I sure as hell didn't know how.
In October of 2014, I reached out to a psychiatrist to help asses the dynamics of my depression. I began talk therapy once a week, and began to think more critically about my reactive behavior. This is also when I began to study the concept of mindfulness. I attempted to make meditation a more consistent part of my routine. I reassessed my values. I made a commitment to doing the work of steady and consistent self-reflection. I looked at things in great detail for months, until the bigger picture started to reveal itself. The issues underlying my self-hate started to be exposed under the bright light of objective awareness.
Then, in February 2015, another breakup. My partner moved out, and I was swallowed by self-pity and shame. I started taking anti-depressant medication to ease the immediate and unbearable pain. I needed to continue functioning at work. I had little energy or motivation to be social or enjoy any other aspect of life. The medication was a difficult adjustment. It was physically uncomfortable adapting to the chemicals, but it provided enough separation from the narrowness of hope-deprivation and apathy that I was able to begin seeing opportunities for my future and began believing that I would eventually heal.
Several months later, I made a fresh start. I practiced more openness, listened more to my intuition, and started to find my voice. I also prioritized some healthier habits, such as staying socially connected, being mindful of my physical health, expressing instead of holding back my thoughts and emotions, letting creativity happen, and making kindness a part of my routine. This became my checklist, my value system, my guide for daily living.
C - Connection
H - Health
E - Expression
C - Creativity
K - Kindness
I deemed this my grounding resource. I tracked my adherence to it somewhat religiously. I found it to be helpful in making me feel a sense of peace. I felt more confident and self-assured that I was taking the right steps, consistently and courageously, toward a more authentic me.
A shitstorm of events have happened since making this checklist one year ago. I have struggled internally with some of the most shameful, confusing, and intense truths about myself. I have made life-altering decisions, confronted deeply-rooted beliefs, let go of hugely self-damaging habits, and taken enormous leaps of faith. My partner and I reconciled and are now living together. We're both experiencing more openness, more vulnerability, better communication, and more frequent compromise than before, and we are much better at acknowledging the awkwardness and disappointment that we were too proud to admit before. Our relationship isn't perfect, but at least now it includes two people that know themselves a little better and can stand up for themselves when necessary. I don't fear becoming lost in the relationship because I know my checklist will always be there to make sure I'm listening to my own voice and standing on my own principles.
Today, I am more accepting of my body and size even though I have put on some of the weight I initially lost. I have more patience with myself. I am more honest about my flaws, and although I haven't given up all of my unhealthy habits, I'm much better at noticing the motivations and needs behind them than I was before. I'm comfortable being alone or with others. I'm learning how to comfort myself without medication or distraction or appeasement from others. I am learning how to fully look at the present moment instead of running away, either toward the future in anticipation or back to the past with nostalgia or regret. This is still a difficult thing to do, and I am grateful for the opportunities to improve at it. I also embrace the fact that right now, I'm not great at it. I'm here. Alive. Evolving. I love being in the midst of this transformation. It is in this imperfect and messy place that I feel the most sense of belonging as well as the most free.