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Reported Speech: Varieties, a Critique, and a New Name
- Abstract
- Introduction
- Language Teaching – Drill and Bore
- Curiosities of Direct Speech
- Humorous Reported Speech: Tom Swiftisms
- Sentence Types in Reported Speech
- A Critique of the Terminology of Our Topic
- Subjective Reported Speech
- Conclusions
- Works Consulted
Reported, or indirect speech is taught with as few words or structures as "said", "told someone", "asked someone/if" and perhaps a couple more of imperative forms. Our most exhaustive source listed around three score of such verbs. This presentation started with an analysis of four hundred verbs, related to one another by definition; and classified them not only according to structure, but into thesaurus-type categories. The idea of which verbs deal with speech is not uniform, which is one of the facts brought out both through the lists and a critique of the standard terms used for this topic. An all-encompassing new terminology is proposed.
This page does not teach reported speech per se, but does look at some of the ways that it is presented, and analyzes these. Furthermore, the very terminology "reported speech" is examined from what I hope is a completely new point of view. We reflect on the levels of precision provided through the reporting term, and the accuracy of the very idea of "reported" or "indirect speech". Finally, we propose that it should be called something else, in that it unconsciously follows the German principle of considering any statement attributed to someone else, as having been of dubious truth.
Students reading this are advised to be aware of what is demanded by their teachers, or on the tests that they would take. Variety may be the spice of life, but is not always well-countenanced, especially in badly-designed multiple-choice tests, especially if these latter are corrected by a software program.
A few days ago, I posted an article considering reported speech as it relates to conditional sentences. While thinking about the topic, other ideas came to me. A list was made up of as many reporting verbs as possible before exhaustion set in.
The reader is asked to accept the following on faith, as it cannot be demonstrated: A list of 356 verbs, previously classified into thesaurus-type entries, was put into a spread-sheet; suggestions from a text, which were added in red, brought this number to 409. After ordering the list alphabetically, and eliminating redundancies, ony 345 terms were listed, including 17 new ones. The Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary was used to help bring the number back up to just over 400, skewing the results towards the letter "A". These were entered in blue. They were then reclassified (not yet shown here) as appropiate for direct, irdirect, or both types of discourse; as suitable for affirmative, interrogative, imperative, or exclamatory utterances; by verb families, and by families of similar meanings.
Language Teaching: Drill and Bore
Students, you`ve been drilled, you've been bored. So you end up saying, "You said me …", because you've heard Lionel Richie's song, without knowing the underlying meaning: "Say 'You', say 'me'".
You tell me that "Say me" exists, when I say it doesn't. Ah, but how sweet is the drill afforded by the repetitious pop song! You weren't bored then, but neither did you learn correct grammar!
Teachers, are you not bored with the constant exercise of reported speech (if that is what the course requires) of: "[S]he said (that) …"? (e.g. in O`Neill, Kingsbury, et. al, 1978, 142; Thomson and Martinet, 1980, 258-62 [most of their examples are with "said"]).
Perhaps we move along a bit, and also construct reported speech along the lines of: "[S]he told someone (that) …".
If the course allows creativity, we might actually construct sentences of an entirely different nature:
Student: "I heard `say me` on the radio."
A more original form of the reported speech: The student protested that [s]he had heard 'say me" on the radio.
If, as based on personal experience, we can take this to be a dialogue between student and instructor, the teacher may very well take the former's comment to be a protest, a complaint, a suggestion of pedagogical error:
Jean suggested that the teacher was mistaken, because [s]he had heard "say me" in a song.
Some teachers would encourage their students to take the type of creative liberty with reported speech found in the example above. The student, in that case, should be very happy, but then there exists the pitfall that the construction chosen may not have been as easy as the standard one with "said". As a consequence, errors may arise.
While not wanting to suppress creativity, we prefer not to go too far. In most cases, it would not be necessary to adjust oneself to the following parameters, but there are cases when reported speech should be of such a nature, that were it necessary to reconstruct the original words used, they would manifest themselves with 100 % accuracy.
Various reporting verbs were tested in this light. Only the neutral "say", in our opinion, works satisfactorily from every point of view, while other words which maintain the correct idea either are restricted in their placement in a sentence, or may incorrectly judge the speaker's attitude or frame of mind.
This writer's focus on correctly transmitting the idea might have been the result of a parlour past-time, perhaps known as the telephone game, in which a good number of players are required. It definitely came from something a teacher of ours tried in primary school. Unfortunately, she partially invalidated the outcome by telling us what would happen, thus allowing any mischievous pupils to deliberately jeopardize the results.
It was something like this: The teacher whispered something to the student in the front of the first row to her left. Each pupil whispered the statement to the one behind him, or, once the end of the row had received the message, it was passed on to the person to the left. Forty whisperings later (2 grades in one classroom), the final person would communicate the message [s]he received – most unlike the original – to the entire class. Here we see how reported speech can imitate rumour, when it goes around enough times, especially with a reporting structure which does not allow for an exact reconstruction of the original statement.
Going back to the present, our chain of thought then continued with standard transformations of "reported" speech:
Reporter: The president of the country has cancelled all appointments today, as it is expected that new leadership will be sworn in within 24 hours.
It was reported that the president had cancelled all appointments that day, as it was expected that new leadership would be sworn in within 24 hours of that breaking news item.
In the preceding, some creativity was employed to prevent the use of "reported" and "of that (news) report".
Our private joke is that reported speech is apt for the news reporter. By the way, how many textbooks have teachers seen which expect students to engage in a rôle play as one of these characters? Do the majority of the students agree, or do some, as maybe the teacher, find this to be a rather artificial exercise?
From our reporter, we move on to something more dynamic. Unfortunately, the results are rather clumsy.
Drill sergeant: "When I say 'jump', ask me, 'How high?'"
The drill sergeant barked at the recruits that they should ask him how high they should jump when he gave the command.
The preceding requires some major rewording, as it deals with both an order and an embedded question, while the original idea that the sergeant would be "barking" required a rather clumsy construction. Our sentence would be better with a verbatim reporting verb, and woe betide if the person quoted were to take exception to that choice of wording:
The drill sergeant barked, "When I say 'jump', ask me, 'How high?' "
Unfortunately, many of the metaphorical words which suggest themselves present exactly the same problem.
Curiosities of Direct Speech
Before proceeding, it may well be worth observing that direct speech has its own peculiarities. We are so used to:
A sentence such as:
Impossible: Zarathustra spoke, "Nietzche will report my words";
while this is permitted:
Let us look at another example, clumsier, but not impossible:
The agent was reproached with the words, "You are part of a team."
The agent was reproached with the reminder that [s]he was part of a team.
Although the Oxford Learner's Dictionary may not classify words such as "reproach" as valid for direct speech, this paper will consider that they are.
"Intend" is one such example, one of the 17 additions to this essayist's original list, is an example which does not permit easy manipulation. We hardly believe that it should be understood, in the context of the other 16 words submitted, that the original quoted statement to have been something like one of the following:
Extensions of the problem of clumsy sentences have suggested themselves to this writer with words such as "growl", "grunt", "purr", "bleat", "mew", "squeak", "squeal", "snort", "trumpet", "blare", etc. It is seen that these words, which come from animals or instruments, are applied metaphorically to humans. No difficulty, of course, exists, when these are used in direct speech. Most of the verbs listed further below suffer from the same defect.
We must also warn the reader that the Cobuild text gives a broader view of what the Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary (1995) defines as speech verbs, admittedly limited to those usable in direct quotations. In this article, we follow the ideas of the former text.
Humorous Reported Speech – Tom Swiftisms
Something akin to "Tom Swiftisms" suggest themselves, in the following, provided as a lighter interlude to our main ideas:
The commander (commandingly) commanded … ,
The director (directly) directed … ,
The instructor (instructively) instructed …. ,
The soothsayer (soothingly) said … ,
This last sentence, according to the Wikipedia article "Tom Swifties" derives from the author of the series of books on the eponymous hero feeling it necessary to add to the word "said". That said, let this writer clarify:
- He read most of the series in the 6th or 7th grade;
- His first-year university English professor professed a disdain for the construction;
- No Swiftism (the professor's word) is remembered, but the one's found on the web were probably worse than the original creations – hence, we suggest a couple:
"You wouldn't dare try to shoot me in cold blood," the mobster said icily.
"I should advise you to rigously apply Fowler's rules from his Modern English Usage," the schoolmaster/schoolmistress said bookishly.
"I bleat, you bleat, we all bleat for awful eats," chanted the child sheepishly in a bad imitation of the coldly cried words, "I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice-cream."
Sentence Types and Reported Speech
The paragraph just previous to the section of Swiftisms serves as a lead-in to this section, in that it is the beginning of what could be a very large list of reporting verbs. Many of these will not lend themselves to accuracy in recreating the original words of a speaker, but are useful for fictional narrative and poetry.
We remember that there are four kinds of sentences: declarative (affirmative or negative), interrogative, imperative, and exclamatory. The first of these is most associated with the word "said", the second with "asked if/whether", the third with "requested", "demanded", and others, and the last with "exclaimed". This list is not exhaustive, and we can subdivide the categories:
Under the declarative type, we might put as possible reporting verbs all those animal and mechanical sounds mentioned two paragraphs above. We can add formal words used in the courtroom, by the police, by academics, by institutions, etc.: declare, plead, state, aver, ascertain, promise, vow, etc.
We can talk about repetition: repeat, parrot, echo, … There may be a similar element in: insist, harp, nag …. Perhaps, closely related: recite, tell (as to "tell one's beads"). Pray", in the non-pleading sense is a category apart.
Musical styles: sing, chant, intone, hum
Loud styles (also valid for categories below): shout, bruit, cry, yell, scream; and the opposite: whisper, murmur
Style of complaint: Murmur, grumble, groan, complain, talk back, answer back
Say for the first time to a third party (good and bad senses): reveal, make known, announce, divulge, report, snitch, squeal, tattle
Imprudent speech: Idle: gossip, rumour
Imprudent speech: Vulgarity: swear, curse
Imprudent speech: Violation of religion: Swear, curse, blaspheme
Speech with anger: (in addition to terms for loudness and vulgarity) spit, huff, and expectorate.
Others: interrupt, cut in, put in one's 2 cents worth, interject, blurt, etc.
Opposite of interrogative: answer, reply, respond.
Implied reported speech: think, consider, deem
We'll stop there, and go on to the interrogative forms, which are more limited:
Ask, question, query, inquire, enquire, demand (in interrogative sense). "Wonder", for rhetorical questions.
The most common imperative forms:
Order, command, instruct, brief, tell (someone to do something)
An interesting category is that of the exclamatory sentences, where the reporting verb is often closely associated with a word or phrase.
Pain: Ouch! – cry out
Disgust: (expletives) – swear, curse
Profanity: (expletives) – blaspheme, curse, swear
True or mock compliment: Nice try! – compliment; say ironically or sarcastically
Disappointment: Oh, no!: cry (use with "disheartened")
Some of the single words, such as "Oh!", might have various functions.
The above is to show that simple texts do not go into the full range of possibilities of what is available. Neither, of course, have we.
A Critique of the Terminology of Our Topic
A citation from another work, incorporated into an essay is the equivalent of direct speech. Should such a quote in any form be given indirectly, it could use almost any of the non-animal, non-instrumental, or non-speech-defect verbs given in this article. This is something that none of this writer's books have dealt with. To be all-inclusive then, the term could more appropriately be, "reported citation". Especially apt for the journalistic profession, nonetheless, even this falls short of what we think it should be called. Would that the people in that line of work followed our ideas of allowing the original words to be reconstructed, and that the spreading of the news not end up in some kind of garbled rewording as in our anecdote about the teacher who whispered some text into a pupil's ear.
When "Speech", "Say" and "Read" Merge
Further introductory remarks for our criticims are that the three words of this subsection are not limited to vocalized words, but can be extended even beyond that which is written. Taking them one-by-one:
Speech is found in "figures of speech", which may be written. Of course, everything that we are now capable of putting down into readable words is derived from spoken elements, about 1000 terms in our European languages. We can prepare the text of a speech, give the actual discourse, and then, in whole or in part, put it again into reported speech – or plagiarize it. The derived verbal form can be used figuratively, as in "The geological record speaks volumes to us about changes in the earth's crust."
In the example of the last sentence, we could have used "say". It is, in essence, about information imparted in some form. More commonly, especially to a person with reading difficulties, we might answer a question as to what a sign says.
Both of the preceding examples can have "read" as a verb substituted for the previously suggested one. We read the geological record, or a sign reads, "No loitering".
In order to avoid the creation of further subsections, we include here other concepts. Consider the needle on a phonograph which "reads" the squiggles of a record, and actually renders them into sound – spoken or sung if applicable. Remember the magnetic heads of a tape recorder, in the floppy or hard-drive of a computer. Optical drives read laser-generated pits in CD or DVD-ROMs.
In older technologies, or perhaps those sometimes used in emergecies, a telegraph operator can tell us what a message in Morse code says. Navegotors, especially in the navy, may have to understand what message is being said by flashing lights, or flag signalling. Hence, anything which can be interpreted into some form of information, whether frivolous or serious, is being said to us, perhaps after being read to us.
Should it be asked, "What does Bach's Brandenburg Conciertos say to us about his music?", we are more than likely not asking someone to look at the musical scores, but to listen to how they sound, and give intelligent comment.
Based on the preceding, reporting forms, whether for direct or indirect communication of information, need not, as in most reference works, refer to spoken words only.
But for the moment, assuming the traditional interpretation, we look unkindly upon the term "indirect speech", because it it is redolent of someone too cowardly to "come right out and say it", or that something is being implied, as in a veiled threat:
Commoner: "I was indirectly threatened by the official who suggested that I not do it."
Note that in the preceding, we both quote exact words, and use "indirect speech".
We remain with a Latin term, oratio obliqua, but both "indirect" and "oblique" can suggest deceit.
As was the title of some famous books, with 3 different Russian authors using the same title, Nikolai Chernyshevsky, Leo Tolstoy, and Vladimir Lenin we ask ourselves What is to be done? What name can we propose?
My suggestion is "subjunctive citation".
We give two reasons for this. The first one looks at reality, and at how reporting it can distort the truth.
The German words "indirekte Rede" translate as "indirect speech", but the treatment in that language requires something which is almost in disuse in modern English: the subjunctive.
The theory is that the person who narrates what was originally said by another, takes no responsibility for the accuracy of the statement.
Here is an example that must resonate with many persons:
This sentence has the beauty of being almost faithfully translated (using the German text): The president said that one should read his lips, that there would be no new taxes.
So, the first part, the person who quotes does not take any part in claiming the truth of the original sentence – hence, only the person originally speaking can be held to his or her word.
Moreover – and this is why reporters should be more intelligent in their write-ups or broadcasts – as long as the speaker did not use the dipthong "O" sound as in the American Midwest, lip-reading for "no" and "new" are identical. While such a deceit may not have been practiced in the situation from which we are borrowing, the statement might just have been, "New, new taxes!" The message of the lips then, could truthfully prevail over that of the remaining speech organs.
The reader may also note that in "Read my lips", we are asked to determine what the lips say, without listening to the actual words. It is thus possible to tie in the argument from the section on the merging of the words "speech", "say", and "read", in the context of whether what we read truly concords with what was spoken. This is often the excercise of attorneys, who try to advise clients that the apparent wording of a law in one's favour might just work the other way around.
The second reason for our proposed name is this: should we now use the word "suggest" instead of the tedious "said", we do get a subjunctive form in English:
The president suggested that his lips be read, that there would be ( = were to be) no new taxes.
Let us look at another example from German, easily recognizable in English.
Der Student sagt, "Ich komme am Montag".
Reported: Der Student sagte, dass er am Montag käme.
English: The student suggested that would be coming on Monday.
The problem with the word "suggest", and its corresponding use of the subjunctive, is that it cannot easily be applied to oneself.
Professor zum Student: "Schreib deutlich!"
Reported: Der Professor verlangte, dass der Student deutlich schreibe.
English: The professor demanded that the student write clearly. (Br. Eng.: "should write").
While the use of words such as "suggest", "hint", "intimate", etc. would seem to be unlikely substitutes for "said", we justify ourselves after considering interrogative sentences.
The subjunctive form can be clearly seen in the interrogative of both of the languages under discussion:
Lady to Gentlemen: "Haben Sie Feuer?" [Do you have a light?]
Reported Speech: Die Frau fragte den Herrn, ob er Feuer hätte.
English: The lady asked the gentleman if he had a light.
One might object, that the "had" is simply the restating of the present in the past, according to the rules of reported speech. Let us offer our take on this:
- There is an implied 2nd conditional, hence, subjunctive involved.
The lady, by her question, implied that if the gentleman had a light, she would be happy to have her cigarette lit by him.
As a form of reported speech, the above is surely quite wordy, and pure English generally goes for keeping things short.
- The Anglo-Saxon word "say" was "secgan" in Old English, a cognate of the German "sagen". We offer the opinion, that while a substantial number of reporting words are followed by the subjunctive form in English, "say" has lost it, in a process of simplification. This does not mean that the implication of the subjunctive mood needs to be dismissed. We retain that in our offering, "subjunctive citation", and warn that this is not to be viewed as "subjective speech", which is what happens when one of the more creative reporting words is used.
Subjective Reported Speech
At this point, we should, in line with the above, call it "Subjective Subjunctive Citation", but this is a terrible mouthful. Granted, it is an option, but the very word "subjective" may reflect upon the validity of the term "reported speech", as much as it does upon any non-objective citation.
We do emphasize the "subjective" part here.
When we gave the example of the sergeant barking, we may have been most correct, according to the standard manner of such an NCO giving orders, but the word does have a subjective element, which might arouse the wrath of the person quoted, were [s]he to be apprized of the situation. And perhaps, could it not have been more of a growl, a grunt, a boom, or simply a command or an order? Redundancy here is to emphasize the different words which can be used.
On this basis, we recommend the use of such subjective terms in fictitious reporting, or in poetry. Many learners of a second language are interested in a practical vocabulary and grammar. While the life of an EFL or ESL teacher could be quickened by not having to teach the same platitudes over and over, especially where American English is being taught, and while H. W. Fowler considers a certain style of wordiness to be "elegant variation", in science and mathematics, elegance is expressed in short, precise formulae. Some would say the same for the use of language – here Fowler refers, for example, to "Love of the Long Word".
It may be noted that, in conformity with our extended definition of reported speech, an expert in Morse code, upon hearing the delivery of some missive, might report, in "subjective citation", "The telegraph clacked out the message that the stagecoach would be travelling through the area with five distinguished visitors and a strongbox full of gold coins." However, in this sentence, the verb "clacked" does not have the subjectivity that is found as when we say that the sergeant barked.
Our text, the reader may have noticed, does not quite follow Fowler-type rules. However, we have waxed more philosophical than empirical, and as this is no academic journal, we permit ourselves certain liberties.
Very few reporting verbs allow for a precise reconstruction of a quoted sentence. Even the number of reporting verbs for a citation is limited, although more possibilities exist when using adverbs or adverbial constructions. Sentences were then tested in indirect speech, where the principal idea was posited, that the terminology in use is imprecise in communicating the function it supposes. If direct, it goes beyond the spoken word, but encompasses anything written, or even sign language. If not quoted, it should be considered subjunctive, as the person rewording the text is neither able to vouch for the truth of the original statement, nor would [s]he be willing to be quoted as having said so.
That said, is "subjunctive citation" or something similar ever to be adopted?
November 6, 11 & 16, 2017.
© 2017, Paul Karl Moeller
Subject to improvements.
In addition to sources listed in our article "Reported Speech and Conditional Sentences" , this article references, or used:
Hornby, A.S., Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary, 5th ed., 1995.
Hornby, A.S., Gatenby, E.V., et. al. The Advanced Learner's Dictionary of Current English, 2nd Ed., Oxford, 1963.
Robert O'Neill, Roy Kingsbury, Tony Yeadon, Edwin T. Cornelius, Jr., American Kernel Intermediate, Longmans, 1978.


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text:
Sorry guys, someone who was a hugely important part of my life before my brain flipped and I became a hermit lost her dad last night. So instead of worrying about the blog today I am standing by Skype and facebook in case she needs to talk. I can't go there because even if it was just her I would have to heavily medicate myself which would not be much help and her whole family is there making me visiting impossible. She understands and so does her family but I feel like a completely horrible person about it anyway.
Broyhill in the shortest trial ever was convicted on all counts. He got life +19 to 25. I'd like to point out that that is how you expediently run a trial and other than the one little fuckup by totally a Judge calling the defense attorney Mr. Argument during closing it was a very tight trial. Boring as fuck but tight.
Hernandez is ongoing and what a shit show that is. Might break in on that one if nothing else is jumping.
Anyway, I'm around but I have to be available for my friend. So for anyone who hasn't seen this Just skip ahead to 44:32 for the pertinent parts.
Hope everyone is well and I do apologize my plans for today's blog will have to wait till tomorrow.
EDIT: This is getting stupid now. I went to see what Sandra webber had written on her blog and she said someone who I did not believe to be Juans tie was Juans tie and the girl was being harassed so I told her I thought she was wrong. So now apparently I'm not Sandra but we are best friends. FUUUUUCK.


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Dog walkers set for £100 fines!
There is a new fine in place which means that dog walkers can now be fined £100 simply for leaving the house without a 'poop bag'.
The fine will be doled out under a 'Public Space Protection Order' and can be issued even if your dog hasn't fouled.
Anyone who fails to pay the fine within seven days could face a further fine of £1,000 and even prosecution! Special enforcement officers will now be asking dog owners to show how they can clean up after their pet (with bags).
The measure has been introduced by Daventry Council in Northamptonshire and is believed to be the first time pre-emptive measures against irresponsible dog owners have been taken. It will come into force on December 1 this year.
If successful the measure could be adopted by other councils and rolled out across the country.
CLICK HERE to read more over on The Metro.


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Police are looking for the driver who hit and killed a woman walking in San Francisco's Visitacion Valley Thursday morning, a police spokesman said.
The fatal collision was reported at 11:16 a.m. at Bayshore Boulevard and Visitacion Avenue, police spokesman Officer Albie Esparza said.
The pedestrian, a woman identified Friday as 82-year-old Oi Yeung, had been walking east on Visitacion Avenue and crossing Bayshore Boulevard in a crosswalk with a green light, Esparza said.
Police had initially believed Yeung was in her 60s.
Yeung was struck when an SUV that had been heading east on Visitacion Avenue made a left turn onto Bayshore.
The driver continued north on Bayshore before turning left onto Leland Avenue, a block away, Esparza said.
Witnesses told police it looked like the driver was turning around to head back to the scene, but instead he drove away, south on Bayshore Boulevard, according to Esparza.
The suspect is described as having short curly hair and light brown skin and is either black with light skin or Hispanic, Esparza said.
He was driving a white Dodge Durango SUV with a black ski rack on top, according to Esparza.
Yeung was pronounced dead at the scene, Esparza said.
As of 2:50 p.m., San Francisco Municipal Railway buses and light-rail vehicles were affected by ongoing police activity, according to Muni spokesman Paul Rose.
T-Third Street inbound light-rail vehicles are switching back at Armstrong Avenue and the 8X-Bayshore Express and 9-San Bruno bus lines are rerouting around the area.


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Urban Beach are excited to announce our official partnership with the Ohana Girls Surfing & Fitness Tour this summer!
Kicking off the adventure at Perranporth Surf School, Cornwall on the 14th and 15th of June, the event will be run by pro surfer and Urban Beach brand ambassador Tehillah 'Tee' McGuinness!
Having Growing up in South Africa Tee is now based in Fuerteventura, where she runs Ohana Fitness & Surf. Away from her business, Tee divides her time charging waves professionally, being a personal trainer and modelling!
Just some of the things you can expect from Ohana Girls Surfing & Fitness are Surf lessons, fitness, stretching and a cream tea! So whether you're looking to learn how to ride waves for the first time or a seasoned water woman looking to improve your surfing this summer, you can look forward to a truly awesome weekend!
You'll even receive an 'Ohana Girl' goodie bag from the event, featuring some awesome free Urban Beach gear!
To reserve a space on Tee's action packed surf weekend is just £80; spaces are limited so book now to bag your place! (See poster below)


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In order to carry out its duties as a school and business, St Joseph's Catholic Primary School needs to collect and process information about the people with whom it works. This includes staff, including present employees, prospective new employees and past employees; pupils, governors,volunteers and others. Any information, howsoever recorded or stored, which can be used to identify a living individual is known as Personal Information. Personal information can be as little as a name and address or as complex as their entire school file. It can be factual information
about an individual or opinions about them. It could also include information which is deemed 'sensitive' and needs to be processed with additional care and attention. The school is required by law to ensure any personal information collected is properly managed. The school will act in accordance with the General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) and the expected provisions of the Data Protection Act 2018 (DPA 2018) as set out in the Data Protection Bill.
Privacy Policy
It is St Joseph's Catholic Primary School's policy to respect your privacy regarding any information we may collect while operating our website. This Privacy Policy applies to https://www.stjosephs.camden.sch.uk (hereinafter, "us", "we", or "St Joseph's Catholic Primary School"). We respect your privacy and are committed to protecting personally identifiable information you may provide us through the Website. We have adopted this privacy policy ("Privacy Policy") to explain what information may be collected on our Website, how we use this information, and under what circumstances we may disclose the information to third parties. This Privacy Policy applies only to information we collect through the Website and does not apply to our collection of information from other sources.
This Privacy Policy sets forth the general rules and policies governing your use of our Website.
– Website Visitors
Like most website operators, St Joseph's Catholic Primary School collects non-personally-identifying information of the sort that web browsers and servers typically make available, such as the browser type, language preference, referring site, and the date and time of each visitor request. St Joseph's Catholic Primary School's purpose in collecting non-personally identifying information is to better understand how St Joseph's Catholic Primary School's visitors use its website. From time to time, St Joseph's Catholic Primary School may release non-personally-identifying information in the aggregate, e.g., by publishing a report on trends in the usage of its website.
St Joseph's Catholic Primary School may also collects potentially personally-identifying information like Internet Protocol (IP) addresses for logged in users only on https://www.stjosephs.camden.sch.uk. St Joseph's Catholic Primary School only discloses logged in user IP addresses under the same circumstances that it uses and discloses personally-identifying information as described below.
– Security
The security of your Personal Information is important to us, but remember that no method of transmission over the Internet, or method of electronic storage is 100% secure. While we strive to use commercially acceptable means to protect your Personal Information, we cannot guarantee its absolute security.
– Links To External Sites
Our website may contain links to external sites that are not operated by us. If you click on a third party link, you will be directed to that third party's site. We strongly advise you to review the Privacy Policy and terms and conditions of every site you visit.
We have no control over, and assume no responsibility for the content, privacy policies or practices of any third party sites, or services.
– Aggregated Statistics
St Joseph's Catholic Primary School may collect statistics about the behaviour of visitors to its website. St Joseph's Catholic Primary School may display this information publicly or provide it to others. However, St Joseph's Catholic Primary School does not disclose your personally-identifying information.
– Cookies
To enrich and perfect your online experience, St Joseph's Catholic Primary School uses "Cookies" to display content and store these preferences on your computer.
A cookie is a string of information that a website stores on a visitor's computer, and that the visitor's browser provides to the website each time the visitor returns. St Joseph's Catholic Primary School uses cookies to help identify visitors usage of our website. Visitors who do not wish to have cookies placed on their computers should set their browsers to refuse cookies before using https://www.stjosephs.camden.sch.uk's website, with the drawback that certain features of our website may not function properly without the aid of cookies.
By continuing to navigate our website without changing your cookie settings, you hereby acknowledge and agree to St Joseph's Catholic Primary School's use of cookies.
– Privacy Policy Changes
Although most changes are likely to be minor, St Joseph's Catholic Primary School may change its Privacy Policy from time to time, and in our sole discretion. We encourages visitors to frequently check this page for any changes to its Privacy Policy. Your continued use of this site after any change in this Privacy Policy will constitute your acceptance of such change.
– Contact Information
If you have any questions about this Privacy Policy, please contact us.


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Sehwag is part of the big league
Careless, reckless, overly impatient... Virender Sehwag has copped all these adjectives of criticism. Today, he plays his 100th Test match and it's a heavyweight of an occasion
Careless, reckless, overly impatient... Virender Sehwag has copped all these adjectives of criticism. Today, he plays his 100th Test match and it's a heavyweight of an occasion. In a way, he has silenced his critics by joining great Indian batsmen like Sunil Gavaskar, Sachin Tendulkar, Dilip Vengsarkar, Rahul Dravid, VVS Laxman and Sourav Ganguly in the 100-plus Tests club.
Sehwag started his Test career with a century at Bloemfontein on the South Africa tour of 2001-02, but he truly emerged as a devastating batsman when asked by skipper Sourav Ganguly and coach John Wright to open the innings on the 2002 tour of England. He nearly got a hundred in his first Test as opener and his dismissal in the second innings of that Test caused a journalist in England to term it as a potential match-losing shot. India did lose the Test.
He was smarter than the cynics gave him credit for though and went on to get a hundred in the next Test at Trent Bridge. Even though he indulges in rash play at times, it is wrong to believe that he doesn't give much thought to his cricket.
Sehwag wouldn't be Sehwag if not for his aggressive ways and though he has been frustrating at times — like his king pair in Edgbaston last year, he must be given credit for his 8,000 plus runs for India.
Captains the world over pay him the biggest compliment each time they delay their declaration in order to make India's fourth innings targets near-impossible to get because the batting order has a certain Virender Sehwag.
You can never bet on what Sehwag will do to the bowlers. He can be brilliant or benevolent in his 100th Test at the Wankhede Stadium, but he must be accepted as one of the many great batsmen produced by this country. At tea-time, the Indian team can drink to that!
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Sometimes, life just doesn't make sense, offering those wtf moments in my day where I am confounded to no end. Why do we drive on a parkway but park on a driveway? What would happen if Pinocchio said "my nose will now grow"?
Beats me.
Maybe such anomalies aren't really thought-provoking as much as frustrating logical parodoxes and aren't worth our precious time being mulled over. But trying to think certain things through occasionally throws life into a new perspective. I mean, what if you really are just a reflection of the man in the puddle?
I was planning on this post being a crazy inception-like discussion of mind-bending conundrums but soon realized that not only would it be inefficient and inconclusive (much like me waving my arms wildly and spouting utter nonsense), but it would be more interesting to talk about something more concrete. So, I felt that since I mentioned Calvin from "Calvin and Hobbes" by Bill Watterson in my previous post, I'd talk a little bit more about that.
How does stuff not making !@#$ing sense relate to "Calvin and Hobbes"? Good question. For those of you who are not entirely familiar with one the most beloved comic strips of the 20th Century (I'd be shocked if you weren't), "Calvin and Hobbes" is a strip that follows the richly imagine adventures of Calvin and his trusty tiger, Hobbes. Bill Watterson obviously had something more in mind when he gave his two lead characters the names of great, but edgy, philosphers. Watterson's Calvin, a fractious young boy, was named after the stern philosopher John Calvin (though this version of Calvin was free-spirited, crazily imaginative and, for all his rebelliousness, a generous soul) and Calvin's best friend tiger, named after Thomas Hobbes, was tall, civilized, endlessly friendly, rich in companionable qualities and eternally bonded to his best friend (quite the contrast to our "life is solitary, nasty, brutish and short" Thomas Hobbes).
Since 1985, "Calvin and Hobbes" had graced daily newspaper for ten years before Watterson decided to put his pen down. The voluntary ending of successful comic strips is something new, according to Watterson. More typically, a strip ceases production only when it's such an anachronistic, formulaic, and irrelevant shadow of itself that readers abandon it (and thus, the death of the strip).
"Calvin and Hobbes" stopped appearing in the daily comics in 1995, a decision that Watterson admirably made for fear of having the strip coast into halfhearted repition, as so many long-running strips do. Watterson said:
I was ready to pursue different artistic challenges, work at a less frantic pace with fewer business conflicts, and not incidentally start restoring some balance to my life. "Calvin and Hobbes" was in over two thousand papers and I felt confident that I'd done the best comic strip I could do. It seemed a gesture of respect and gratitude twoard my characters to leave them at top form. I like to think that, now that I'm not recording everything they do, Calvin and Hobbes are out there having an even better time.
I found this excerpt in the Introduction of Watterson's "The Complete Calvin and Hobbes", a collection I proudly keep on my bookshelf (totals to ~1500 pages worth of Calvin and Hobbes) and was deeply affected by Watterson's commitment and fondness for his characters. For those of you interested in anything art-related or are a fan of Watterson's strip, I highly recommend at least taking a peek at the introduction if you get the chance.
Reflecting upon his work in the introduction he wrote to "The Complete Calvin and Hobbes", Watterson observed that his two protagonists revealed different facets of his own personality. Calvin generally voices what Watterson considered his immature side, often echoing the sentiments Watterson saw prevalent in modern America. ("The consumer is always right"; "There has to be a way to cram more violence into ninety minutes"; "Hold on, I need to inflate my basketball shoes.") By contrast, Hobbes offers a voice of ironic maturity — though he is himself far from immune to silliness.
Watterson is actually described as notoriously reclusive in real life, so it's fascinating to through his introduction and comic, the author reveal a personable person not normally shown. Within these pages, he discusses the story of an ornery artist's battle to explore his craft within the claustrophobic confines of a few inches of newsprint space. Watterson fights the strictures of brutal daily deadlines, skirmishes with editors to win more space for his often graceful Sunday pages, slugs it out with his syndicate to keep his creation from being reduced to a stuffed doll. The later strips begin to dwell obsessively on the horrors of our dumbed-down commodity culture, and there's something poignant about the artist's hopeless struggle to work within the confines of mass culture while simultaneously critiquing it. This book collection is truly a testament to Watterson's dedication and to the medium's ability to keep reinventing itself against all odds.
I may have gotten slightly sidetracked from this post's topic, but people still remember "Calvin and Hobbes" because it was never worse than good, and was often simply brilliant. It parodied the issues of the day, the materialism, the greed-is-good cynicism, the pointlessness of television, the rampaging egos, the growing crassness of public intercourse, the bad behavior, our infinitesimal place in the universe. This is where "Calvin and Hobbes" comes in the picture.
The constant sarcasm, imaginative discussions and out-of-this-world analogies on all of life's idiosyncrasies from the perspective of a child truly made this strip unique and resonate among its readers. Watterson was never afraid to question certain things both in his own life and in Calvin's world. A generation earlier, "Peanuts" reshaped the comics world by imagining children with interior psychological lives in a neighborhood devoid of adults, while "Garfield" by Jim Davis observed the solitary life of Jon Arbuckle (as well as the cat Garfield), single and in the middle of a mid-life crisis.
I've been a fan of "Calvin and Hobbes" ever since I was a little kid. Even now, I chuckle inwardly as I flip through the many pages that reveal Watterson's subtle youth and genius. In his very last strip on December 31st, 1995, Calvin sleds off the page with Hobbes exclaiming, "It's a magical world, Hobbes Ol' Buddy…Let's go exploring!" and despite all crazy things that real life throws at us, the only way to understand the confusing parts is to live life some more.


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Interview with Charlotte Colgate
SomoS interviewed Charlotte Colgate, curator of the recent exhibition, AND SURRENDER, about her artistic practice and experiences working on this exhibition.
SomoS: How would you describe your artistic practice in relation to AND SURRENDER, and how did this group of artists come together for the exhibition?
Charlotte Colgate: Well, I curated the show, but it started off with a piece that I started filming about 2 years ago, actually. It's based on ASMR (Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response), which is an online phenomenon. They have quite long videos, and it is always about sound or about tactile things and how people get these shivers in response to certain stimuli. So I started filming this piece, a tryptic, based on three different props that are quite common in ASMR videos – the cone, the rope, and a piece of plastic. And then I moved to Hong Kong for a year, so I planned to show it, but I went away, and when I came back I decided to show it finally. I also decided to be in total control and to use ASMR as an inspiration. So then I reached out to artists who had a similar slant to their works and that I thought I could work well with.
S: It also seems to me that there is a strong emphasis on the senses, and how art can titillate these different senses. What is exactly that interests you in this connection of art and bodily sense?
CC: I think it is how everything together can be pretty overwhelming. For example, if you go to see an amazing gig, the music, the lights, the closeness of the people, the temperature of the room, and everything all together, can emulate strong feelings. This can happen with artworks as well. It does not need to be a static thing that you are looking at. It can be more dynamic, or it can be an experience.
S: In relation to that, what was your goal with And Surrender, if you had any?
CC: Hm, it is a good question. The goal probably is just to have a different gallery experience. Because it was also important to have this show in a gallery space, and not in a basement or outside, or anything like that. So the environment is very controlled, and also it is very different from coming to a general show or opening. With this one they might have to stay a little bit longer and give a little bit of input as well.
S: It is interesting that you say that, because based on the opening of the show, it indeed seems that the exhibition challenges or re-configures the traditional idea of the gallery setting, experience, and the role of the spectator. So how does And Surrender re-configures these traditional positions exactly?
CC: I think they maybe have to engage a little bit more and concentrate. And even if in that moment they think 'Oh, I really don't want to do this' or 'I'm really not into this', then that's also positive in my eyes, because it's having a definite response to the works. So instead of being very passive and just always letting things wash you by, I'd rather kind of make them react in one way or another.
S: So could we maybe say that this is not only an immersive art project, but also a relational one?
CC: Yeah, definitely.
S: Did And Surrender meet your expectations, overall?
CC: Yes, I think it possibly exceeded them. I thought more people would have less of a dramatic reaction, I was quite shocked that they had very strong feelings about the pieces. Even though that's what I was pushing for, I did not exactly expect it to happen to this extent.
S: You emphasize the feelings of the spectator. For me it seems like that these feelings root in the body. In this way, the body of the spectator shifts into the focus of the show. Thus, where does exactly the boundary of artwork and the spectator's body lie in the context of And Surrender?
CC: I think I'm always for to push that boundary a little bit. It is also up to the spectator how much they allow to the boundary to be crossed. For example, with the Georgie Harrison piece, where you can look down into this box in quite a compromising position and then somebody maybe will interact with you, is possibly a bit unexpected, but in case of the other interactions we asked the participants 'do you mind if we do this?', so people were more invited into this game and they were able to decide if they would like to play along or not.
S: Pushing the boundaries in this sense is then another goal of the exhibition?
CC: Yes, certainly.
S: How do you see the future of immersive art?
CC: In general, I think with people like Marina Abramović and performance artists who are coming out with bigger and bigger pieces that people can get involved in, and even in Berlin there are a lot of performance pieces and this whole thing seems to be quite common now, so I think it will keep growing bigger and better.
S: What is next on your agenda?
CC: We would like to do another show in the next couple of months, that would be more focused on sound and performance. And then there is also an immersive artist from London that I am planning to work with in October, but I can't really say more about that at this point.
S: Yet, what can we expect? A bit more of synesthesia?
CC: A lot of music, performance, and interaction with the audience. And yes, lot of synesthesia, and actually it will cover every sense of the human body.


text: Teeth Whitening Everyone dreams of having whiter teeth. At Marple Dental Practice we can make this dream a reality. Teeth Whitening is a simple procedure that gently improves the existing colour of the teeth, to give a brighter, whiter smile. The procedure is painless, quick, does no damage to the teeth and provides outstanding results which can last for years and years. The procedure is so good, the staff at Marple Dental Practice have it done themselves. But this procedure is not suitable for everyone, so if you would like to know if you can have a brighter whiter smile, why not call us to organise an assessment today? Book an Appointment


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No matter if you're crafting a dresser for yourself, your children, or a paying customer, the last thing you want to do is use plans that were put together by someone who didn't know what he or she was doing. For this reason, it is absolutely essential that you only buy plans that were drafted by professionals. Preferably, this won't be limited only to good drafting skills, but will extend to full-on professional woodworking experience. Don't get your plans from someone who could not or would not use them himself or herself. I'm sure I don't have to tell you why this is so important.
Some Woodworker Plans Even Come With Video
7. Giving in to "Last Minute Beauty Panic"
Here's the BIG problem: Most plans and woodworking magazines will result in more pain than anything else. Why? Their diagrams are confusing, unclear, or even wrong and they often skip important parts. No wonder woodworking seemed so hard! Once in a while I come across a free plan that actually is everything a woodworking plan should be, but they are few and far between. And even if you do find one, it may not be the exact plan that is right for you. It's really important to have many good plans to choose from.
First off, you need to decide exactly how big do you want our dresser to be. This factor hinges on a lot of things. For example you would need to think about your budget as well as the things you will be placing inside the dresser. Additionally, you need to consider the space inside the bedroom as well if it can accommodate the size you have in mind.
Best Regards
Woodworking Plans – Do They Really Make A Difference?
Some people might decide to buy a loft bed from a furniture store, but others might want to get more creative and build their own. Some of the simplest loft bed plans are designed so the frame of the bed rests on top of two dressers or a dresser and a desk.


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African medal performance at the 2016 Olympics
The 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, finished a week ago. Traditionally, African nations gather most of their medals in athletics, particularly middle- and long distance running, led by Kenyans and Ethiopians. Only a small fraction of medals come from other sports. South Africa, for example, produces good swimmers and rowers, while Egypt has been good in weightlifting. Olympic football gold has been won by an African country twice.
African countries got a total of 45 medals at the 2016 Olympics, 10 of them golden. If Africa was a country, it would have been placed 7th on the medal table, just above France.


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Orange & Clove Mini 100% Essential Oil Candle
A true aromatherapy candle with just the simplest ingredients to fill your space. All botanical. No synthetic fragrances. Lots of care.
This Orange & Clove candle is inspired by an after-dinner kitchen classic... simmering orange peels & cloves. We'd like think that this candle is a lovely nod to that combination done in a really light, refreshing way.
Therapeutic benefits
Sweet orange - Mood lifting, reduces cortisol (anxiety), insect repellent
Clove - Contains flavanoids which help with reducing headaches, alleviates mental exhaustion & fatigue
We especially like this Orange & Clove candle in the kitchen, bathroom or living area.
Size: 2 fl oz.
Burn time: 10-15 hours
Source: Made in Seattle, WA
Ingredients: US grown soy wax, 100% therapeutic grade essential oils & a cotton paper wick.
Finish: Reuse or recycle candle tin


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Very best quality canvas shotgun slip with a full-length zip opening. You will not find a better product, made in Britain from the very best materials, top quality Bridle Leather shoulder sling and carrying handles, hand-sewn blocked muzzle cap with a fully padded fleece lining are standard features.
Your Initials available on request.
* Hand Made in Britain
* Best quality materials used throughout


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Many people are searching for ways to live in a more Eco-friendly manner, and in many cases, living more Eco-friendly coincides with having a sustainable kitchen. Four aspects homeowners can implement in order to receive the greatest benefits monetarily and environmentally are as follows.
Use natural cleaners
One way to create a more Eco-friendly lifestyle and a sustainable kitchen is making cleaners using natural ingredients. From cleaning the floor to the countertops and appliances, there are many demands for cleaning products in the kitchen. Thankfully, various recipes online offer options when it comes to homemade cleaners. Most of these recipes use natural ingredients such as baking soda and vinegar to create effective cleaners, which are devoid of harmful chemicals. In addition to being better for the environment, homemade cleaners are also much cheaper, meaning homeowners will save a great deal of money when they make their own cleaning products.
Grow your own produce
Anyone who is a vegetarian or a vegan likely understands the expense involved in acquiring produce that has not been treated with chemicals or engineered in some way. For individuals who desire fresh produce without spending a fortune, creating a garden is an excellent idea. Container gardening is a great way to implement this tip as it presents a way for individuals who have little garden space to grow produce. This type of gardening is accomplished by using containers and planting the vegetables or herbs in various containers. Moreover, there are types of container gardens that are designed for outdoor and indoor use. In addition, gardening is a great activity for kids.
Try composting on for size
To grow healthy produce, proper fertilization is necessary. The great news is that most individuals can make their own compost saving money and eliminating their home's waste at the same time. Composting units are available to purchase at most hardware stores. Individuals can use composting containers to dispose of left-over food and bits of leaves and other debris. Eventually, the mixture becomes fertile compost perfect for fertilizing a garden. Therefore, kitchen waste can fuel the creation of new produce that will in turn feed a family. Creating compost and gardening are great family activities and great ways to ensure a sustainable kitchen.
Stop using plastic or foil wrap
The final way individuals can create a more sustainable kitchen is forgoing the use of plastic or foil wrap for food storage or cooking. There are alternatives to foil and plastic when it comes to food storage. For example, reusable silicone lids eliminate the need for aluminum foil or plastic storage in regards to food storage. One size stretches to fit multiple containers. An alternative to foil as a means of keeping food warm is a thermal food cover. These covers perform the same task as foil but can be washed and reused repeatedly.
Creating a sustainable kitchen is an ideal way to establish a more Eco-conscious home. Individuals can implement the tips above to accomplish this task.
Views: 313
Awesome ideas!! Another way to go green in your kitchen is to not use paper towels. We use alot of re-usable towels plus I have made our own washcloths and general cleaning cloths (getting rid of dishwashing sponges too!) from old shirts, pants, socks and sheets. I just throw them in the wash when I do a load, they don't take up much space in your washer either :)
and if you don't want to make you own reusuable "paper towels" you can purchase them.
Hi Alexander. I really enjoyed all of the tips you've listed to be more Eco-friendly but I have a question. I use foil when roasting in the oven so that the braising liquid doesn't evaporate. Lids don't seem stop this by themselves. Any suggestions instead of the foil to accomplish the same result?
Thank you both for the comments. @Appleblossom79, thanks for that tip, my wife and I will definitely consider giving reusable paper towels a go :) @Karin Bosela. My wife and I (mainly my wife, her cooking skills are far superior to my own) have wrestled with this as well. The only solution we have come up with is trying recycled aluminum foil. I know Reynolds has some on the market, not sure about other brands though.
in reference to the comment about the aluminum foil, there is something you can do to reuse it ( you can also recycle it in some places) If you take a piece of foil that has been used and wash it you can ball it up and use it like a dryer sheet ( i would recommend at least 3 foil balls), it works wonders for static electricity. I have stopped using softener and dryer sheets because they contribute to antibiotic resistent bacteria and I have extremely sensitive skin and the balls of foil have really helped with the static in the laundry for me.
Thanks Alexander - I do use recycled foil but I guess I was hoping for a replacement. I wash and reuse it when every possible and will have to look for an upcycle project for it.
Appleblossom - Will have to try the foil in the dryer although I never use dryer sheets but like the idea of removing the static cling.
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- Toby Sinclair
Agile Testing and BDD Exchange Conference Review
On Thursday 6th and Friday 7th November 2014 i attended the "Agile Testing and BDD Exchange" run by Skills Matter in London.
Here are my 5 highlights:
1. Capturing Requirements or Solving problems – @JeffPatton (Key Note)
The conference got off to a great start! Jeff introduced us to a new model for approaching problems and "changing the world" because as he puts it, thats our job as software professionals to change the world with the software we build.
Jeff talked a lot about "Design Thinking" which was a new concept to me:
"Design thinking can be described as a discipline that uses the designer's sensibility and methods to match people's needs with what is technologically feasible and what a viable business strategy can convert into customer value and market opportunity."
A key part of Design Thinking is Empathy with users and Jeff challenged us to "Go to where the people work. Get out of the building, way out of the building!" As a tester this really resonated for me as often i don't spend enough working with my teams user base to understand their problems and what value they want from our products(Quality). Understanding more clearly our users can help inform and guide our testing. This is something i'll be taking back to my team for sure.
2. Improving the Value of BDD – @DavidEvans66
David talked us through some great experiences he's had with applying BDD. What i really liked in this talk was the concept of "Yak Shaving"
"Yak shaving is what you are doing when you're doing some stupid, fiddly little task that bears no obvious relationship to what you're supposed to be working on, but yet a chain of twelve causal relations links what you're doing to the original meta-task."
He related this back to BDD and how often a lot of the time in BDD all we are doing is Yak shaving. I've seen this in many BDD Scenarios where it's impossible to see the intent of the scenario as it's blurred with useless information. It's also prevalent when people apply the techniques of BDD blindly even to things that fall into the simple domain such as user login.
3. Delivery Mapping – @tastapod and @PapaChrisMatts
With "the band back together" as they phrased it, Dan North and Chris Matts presented their ideas around Delivery Mapping, something they've just started to share amongst the community. They talked through a model that brings together Impact Mapping, Skills Mapping and Delivery Mapping.
What really stood out for me was the Skills mapping ideas. Dan and Chris talked through how to use a skills matrix to understand Organisation and Individual needs. The model maps what the needs are of the business are, what skills are currently available and what skills are needed. The ideal is the centre of the model, the gold point. The place you probably don't want to be is where there is a business need that cannot be met but current skills or desired skills of the workforce. If you ever have the opportunity of meeting Dan North, you can ask him about "The Tiger in the tree"
Another great learning was the concept of "Skills Liquidity"
4. Q & A – Dan North and Lee Nicholls
This was a nice change. Instead of a presentation Dan North did a Q&A with Lee Nicholls, who has managed the Agile Transformation at a "Large American Bank". This was really interesting for me because i work at "A larger American Bank" so the context of the discussions were directly relatable. Lee's usage of measurement during their teams Agile Transformation was awesome in particular how they had used lead Time and Cycle Time. He also talked about "Marginal Gains" something which Dave Brailsford introduced to the UK Cycling Team. Using the measurements Lee's teams can work on frequent marginal gains to improve and track their progress. Some of the concepts raised in "Beyond Budgeting" were also discussed. In particular making information transparent and Lee referenced an example from the book where a company needed to make reductions to their expenses cost. Instead of reducing hotel, mileage, travel allowance etc. they introduced a policy that all staff had to put their expense claims on a big visible board in the office. Everyone soon took ownership of keeping their expenses down for the success of the whole team.
5. Experiments with Flow – @13enWilliams, @Jon_Whitaker and @TommRoden
In this highly interactive session we ran through a game to demonstrate Kanban concepts of Flow, Cycle Time and experiments. Ben, Jon and Tom introduced us to the importance of Limiting Work in Progress and the effect that too much work or too little can have on our cycle times. We broke into groups of 10 and were tasked with the following exercise:
After each iteration we had a quick retrospective as a team and reviewed our Cumulative Flow diagram and cycle time measurements. We were then encouraged to try some small experiments to see their effect. We tried a few different experiments such as changing the shape of the group, moving responsibilities amongst the team and using a pull based system instead of push. It was amazing the effect some simple changes could have and seeing the results in black and white really helped to review the impact of the experiments. I will definitely be looking to run this game back with my team.
Agile Testing and BDD Exchange is really a conference for the Whole team. There were many times during the conference i thought, "Our product Owner could find this useful, our developer, our testers, our BA…." I've taken away so many learnings that i can share with the whole team. I'm excited to return to the office Monday with all these ideas!
Thanks to everyone who helped make the conference a success!


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Loft La Maison du Pressoir, Loire
2 room vacation rental in Loire (2 to 6 persons)
Beautiful 65 m² gite built near the Castle of Candes. In this property at the heart of the village, an enchanting setting awaits you for a dream holiday... 100 m away, on this vast property, you will share 2 swimming-pools and a sauna with 4 gîtes of a property situated 100 m away (can be rented together).
On the ground floor :
- living / dining room
- fireplace
- 2 sofa beds
- open kitchen fulli equipped
- bathroow, toilet
1st floor :
- room 1: 2 joinable beds 90 bed 180
- room 2 : 2 joinable beds 70 bed 140
- toilet
WIFI available. Electric heating. Lovely private mature garden with a BBQ and a water point. Parking. On demand: personalized, optional services at extra charge (breakfast, laundry, etc.). Included in price: heating, electricity, water, sheets, towels, tea towels and final cleaning. Price of week-end depends on period


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|Up a level
Busch, Julia and Bardaji, Raul and Ceccaroni, Luigi and Friedrichs, Anna and Piera, Jaume and Simon, Carine and Thijsse, Peter and Wernand, Marcel and van der Woerd, Hendrik and Zielinski, Oliver (2016) Citizen bio-optical observations from coast- and ocean and their compatibility with ocean colour satellite measurements. Remote sensing, 8 (11). p. 879. ISSN 2072-4292


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What I like about country music
Written on Tuesday, December 12, 2006 by Jessica
Country music is one of my favorite music genres. Here's why:
1. It has songs with titles like "I'm Goin' Thru the Big D and Don't Mean Dallas," "That Was Twenty Years and Two Husbands Ago," and "You're the Reason Our Kids Are Ugly."
2. It has groups with names like "The Tractors."
3. It has songs with lyrics like:
Well, I was drunk the day my mom got outta prison.What's not to love? If you enjoyed this post Subscribe to our feed
And I went to pick her up in the rain.
But before I could get to the station in my pickup truck
She got runned over by a damned old train.


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Journal No. 14 - About F-ing time!
Viewed: 901
I'll set the scene of my current position at home. I'm in a towel on the bouncy chair in the corner of our room. Once again I feel confined to these 4 walls because the whole of "Team Uncomfortable" a.k.a. Vino, Vino's ex wife whatever her name is, and Vino's Relic-Mother, are wafting about somewhere outside our room.
Luckily I have 1 bottle of water and so can survive for several weeks under these harsh conditions.
Its 9:39pm and I've just been talking to Viney online while he is in Australia again! Funny because he was there for a year before when I was in England, and I didn't talk to him once then!
Skeen and Barakus also called me earlier today from Spain (to great expense on Skeens mobile), and they were both drunk but it has been a really good day for catching up with friends!
So the last time we wrote was my birthday tales. Its very difficult to remember what we have done nowadays, as things become more normal for us the longer we are out here, and then perhaps a little more forgetable? Thankfully my ever growning OCD type tendancies have caused me to write on our calender whenever we have done something significant! These past few weeks it has become glaringly obvious that as I am ageing, I am also becoming much less care-free and spontaneous, and far more nervous and worrysome(?). Anyway, I plan to do something spectacularly outrageous which will get me back to where I once was. I actually got a but scared and sweaty palmed (thanks mum) on the monorail thing the other day. How silly.
Back to the calendar.
So you know we walked the boxer called Lacey, and incidentally we have't walked her in about 10 days which I found very weird, then it turned out that her owner Ryan had rung Annes phone, not got through, and then didn't bother to ring my phone, thus resulting in no further walkies. Disappointing.
It didn't matter though, as we soon got an email from a lady called Cassandra, who requested that we walk her 3 legged dog "Mila" the next day. She apologised for the short notice, but we didn't care. We met Cassandra and dog that night, got a key to their marina-side apartment, and it was left to me to walk Mila the next evening because Anne would be at work. So I walked her the next day, and she is fantastic and so loveable its ridiculous. She got attention from pretty much everyone we encountered and I picked up poo for the first time. (In a bag of course). She has by far taken Lacey's mantle as "cutest dog ever". I'm serious. After our long walk including treats from an old lady, water from a young lady, grass from a bit of grass, and strokes from too many to mention, I eventually got her home where she drank a big bowl of water then came and plonked herself inbetween my legs as I was sat on the floor and looked up at me for some attention. I honestly could have stayed with her for ages, but thought it might look weird if I was still there when Cassandra came home! |Cassandra is some kind of nurse, and is very nice by the way. Also I know I haven't said what type of dog Mila is, and thats because I don't know, but pictures and info will follow next time we see her.
Cassandras mum has been in town for the past week, but we are supposed to be looking after Mila for the weekend I think perhaps the last weekend in July, which we are really looking forward too!
That was a massive paragraph just about a dog!
Just briefly, we had another call from a guy who wanted his 2 dogs walking, but that fell through as his girlfriend got some "proffesionals" in without his knowledge. What a cow.
So I think it was Monday that I decided I wanted us to move out. Annes has been sort of half checking the housing adds on the internet, but I was in denile that we would stay here, regardless of the annoyances and Team Uncomfortable just because it is so cheap. Either way, something happened in my brain on Monday while Anne was at the Tea House, and I went out to the SWAP office, saw a couple of ads, got the numbers, and called them straight away. Rarely have I been so proactive, especially when on my own!
I spoke to a man who sounded exactly like Vino, so promptly made my excuses and hung up. Then through a few confused voicemails, I spoke to Georgia who was renting a room in her apartment in Kitsilano which is 30 blocks closer to downtown and to Annes Brock House work. She offered a showing for us the next night, so I filled Anne in when she got home, and we agreed to go.
So we met her and her over-protective dog "Basil" and briefly, her flat-mate Dan. She was really nice, and the apartment was really great and in such a nice location. Close to pretty much everything that we need.
If you search for #102, 1988 Maple Street, Kitsilano, Vancouver, you can probably find a picture of the building, and perhaps the inside if you are lucky. Anyway, it turned out that she wasn't origianally going to rent out to a couple, but she'd decided that she didn't really need the big room with double bed (cos she's single), and so basically we're kicking her out of her own room! Its en-suite and has a little patio at its front. There will also be a Spanish girl moving in with us who we are assured is very nice also.
So it didn't take long to agree that we wanted to move in! We do so on August 1st, which is not soon enough if you ask me! We had to sort out an agreed deposit and we are going to sign the paperwork on the 17th this month. So that was all great, except we now had to tell Vino about all this. When we first moved in, he said about him needing 60 days notice! Which I just ignored as being ridiculous, plus I never thought we would move so soon anyway! To cut a long story short (this Journal is already far too long), I eventually told him. Neither Anne nor I wanted this job as he is so difficult to talk to/deal with. Well I think I delt with him pretty alright. Anne was listening through our bedroom door, and cringing as she listened to the awkward conversation. He's so full of it. He talked about being a really fit man, gesturing at his son as being un-fit, and talked some more utter nonsense. I said how I realised we were giving him short notice (less than 1 month), but that there was not much we could do about it, and that we would make an extra effort to find replacement renters for our room so he wasn't left in the lurch! He rents out to so many people, and SWAPers are always needing cheap rooms ro rent, so this should not be a problem. He is a dick though. Suggesting he would hold on to our "damage deposit" if we left without replacement renters because he has to look after himself. Its utter bollox, as he must be making so much money from all of us that are renting here, and then making out that the damage deposit was also a "security" deposit. |Fortunately I have a signed piece of paper by him with the words "damage deposit" on it. I beleive this will hold up in court, and if not, I will prize the money out of his grubby little mitts.
While all this fun stuff was going on, I had 2 walk-in interviews. One with Yuk Yuks comedy club for a bar-back position, and the other for a Bus boy (table cleaner/setter) at the Old Spaghetti Factory in Gastown.
The Yuk Yuks interview brief but good, except there were about 20 people waiting for their turn, and a lot of them were tits. Especially the self-named "Squeezy". We would have not got on.
The OSF interview went really well, and ended with Rob (one of the managers) saying that I would be near the top of the list, which is always good to here! I didn't build my hopes too high after the last time, but secretly built my hopes really high! He said I would hear on Thurday if succesfull.
Thursday came...Thursday evening came. Not wanting to wait anymore, I called them up, and spoke to someone useless and didn't get anywhere. I called again yesterday to try and talk to rob again, but he wasn't there. Then I learned that someone I met on Grouse mountain had already been told that they had got a job there, so I pretty much assumed that I had not. But I rang once more, and finally got hold of Rob who said he would talk to Andre the other manager. Andre was put on the phone and told me to come in Saturday (today) to have an interview with him. I said to Anne that he obviously didn't trust Robs opinion of me and so needed to see for himself! So I went in today and there were 4 other people there (who'd already got the job) who were for orientation. Andre turned up. He looked at me and said that I was supposed to have an interview with him, but that Rob liked me, so I had the Job! Thank god for that, but its not flipping easy!
I'm really lucky that I persisted with the phone calls when I did otherwise who knows what would've happened.
So we were oriented in this big restaurant that I'm sure I will tell you about another time, and then we left. I spoke to Andre on my way out and tried to explain that in my other life, I have an acting career and that he would need to accomodate this if I was ever to become famous. I'm not sure if he understood me, but we will see when I receive my first shifts early next week!
My word thats enought for now. My bum is completely numb from the bouncy chair which is the main thing I will miss when we leave here. Its 11:09pm now. Anne won't be home till 2am. I ate some curly fries earlier which has got me through till now, but now I'm thinking about what I can make with our very understocked fridge. I hope this Journal hasn't been too self-indulgent. I'll make sure Anne writes the next one to relieve my guilt.
Until next time, byeeee!
Other things we did included: going to Ceilies dubious Irish pub last Wednesday night with our kiwi and oz friends. Just for our free drink mind you, and also KFC on tuesday because it is "Toonie Tuesday" which means you get 2 chicken bits and chips for under $3 which is good, but Toonie means 2 dollars and so means Canadians are stupid.
Oh and Anne managed to get 3 tall bendy mirrors and a nice throw rug for $6 at a yard sale accross the street, and then when I came back from the city later that day, there was a TV on the street corner, waiting to be taken for free! So naturally, I took it.
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Vancouver, Canada


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Article content
Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce, the nation's fifth-largest lender, paid chief executive officer Gerald McCaughey $9.24-million in compensation last year, down 7.6% from 2011.
McCaughey received a salary of $1.5-million, a $2.94-million cash bonus and $4.8-million in shares, stock options and long-term incentives, Toronto-based CIBC said today in a filing. That compared with $10-million in compensation in 2011. The amounts exclude pension costs.
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CIBC chief McCaughey's compensation cut more than 7% amid record profit Back to video
Under McCaughey, the bank posted record profit of $3.3-billion for the year ended Oct. 31, a 14% increase from the prior year, according to financial statements. CIBC is the fifth of the country's six biggest banks to report 2012 compensation for its top executives.
CIBC also awarded Richard Nesbitt, group head of wholesale, international, and technology and operations $7.14-million, down 7.5% from 2011. David Williamson, group head of retail and business banking, was awarded $3.95-million, up from $3.45-million in 2011.


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HRS Bibliography
The Persistence of Depressive Symptoms in Older Workers Who Experience Involuntary Job Loss: Results from the Health and Retirement Study. Journals of Gerontology, Series B: Psychological and Social Sciences. 2006;61(4):S221-8.
Involuntary Job Loss as a Risk Factor for Subsequent Myocardial Infarction and Stroke: Findings from the Health and Retirement Survey. American Journal of Industrial Medicine. 2004;45:408-416..


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Fournier gangrene
Also found in: Dictionary, Thesaurus, Encyclopedia, Wikipedia.
Four·ni·er dis·ease(foor-nē-ā'),
infective gangrene involving the scrotum.
Synonym(s): Fournier gangrene, syphiloma of Fournier
Fournier gangrene, Fournier disease (fŏr-nē′ā)
[Jean Alfred Fournier, French dermatologist, 1832–1915]
Necrotizing fasciitis of the genitalia that may spread to the thighs or abdomen. This aggressive and life-threatening form of cellulitis typically occurs in patients who have had local trauma to the perineum and patients with diabetes mellitus.
Multiple aerobic and anaerobic bacteria cause the infection.
Treatment consists of broad-spectrum antibiotics and wide surgical débridement.
Fournier,Jean Alfred, French syphilographer, 1832-1914.
Fournier disease - infective gangrene involving the scrotum. Synonym(s): Fournier gangrene; syphiloma of Fournier
Fournier gangrene - Synonym(s): Fournier disease
syphiloma of Fournier - Synonym(s): Fournier disease


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This library builds and parses messages in the Compact Message Format (CMF).
CMF is a binary format that has the speed and compact size of a binary format combined with the provably correct markup and type-safety of formats like XML and JSON.
A CMF message is a flat list of tokens. Each token is comprised of 3 elements: a tag name, a type, and a value. Tag names are written to the message as numbers, so an external schema dictionary is typically used to map the tag numbers to names.
Each CMF token is completely self-contained. Even a reader that doesn't know the schema of the message it is parsing can still extract all tokens from the message. This makes the format exceptionally useful for extensibility because a reader can just skip over unknown tokens.
This library is distributed as a gem named cmf at RubyGems.org. To install it, run:
gem install cmf
First, require the gem:
require 'cmf'
Next, we'll build and parse a simple message with two tokens. The message will contain the string
"Proxima Centauri", associated with the tag
0, and the floating point number
4.2421 associated with the tag
= CMF.build({0 => "Proxima Centauri", 1 => 4.2421})
# => "\x02\x10Proxima Centauri\x0EGr\xF9\x0F\xE9\xF7\[email protected]"
# => {0=>"Proxima Centauri", 1=>4.2421}
Rather than using the tags
0, and
1, we can define a schema dictionary which maps human-readable names to tag numbers.
dictionary = {star: 0, distance: 1}
= CMF.build({star: "Proxima Centauri", distance: 4.2421}, dictionary)
# => "\x02\x10Proxima Centauri\x0EGr\xF9\x0F\xE9\xF7\[email protected]"
CMF.parse(, dictionary)
# => {:star=>"Proxima Centauri", :distance=>4.2421}
For more flexibility in parsing and building messages, you can use the
CMF::Builder and
CMF::Parser classes.
builder = CMF::Builder.new(dictionary)
builder.add(:star, "Proxima Centauri")
builder.add(:distance, 4.2421)
= builder.to_octet
parser = CMF::Parser.new(dictionary)
parser. =
parser.next_pair # => [:star, "Proxima Centauri"]
parser.next_pair # => [:distance, 4.2421]
parser.next_pair # => nil
parser. = ##
parser.each do |tag, value| # star: Proxima Centauri
puts "#{tag}: #{value}" # distance: 4.2421
end ##
Supported platforms
Ruby 2.1 and above, including jruby.
For complete documentation, see the CMF page on RubyDoc.info.


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The cottages range in size from 1 to 4 bedrooms and can accommodate groups of 32 people in total and in 2 of the cottages we welcome pets by prior arrangement.
We are situated 2 miles from the Beautiful, Historic Village of Abbots Bromley (famous for the annual horndance in September), around 10 miles from Stafford with Cannock Chase, Uttoxeter, Lichfield, Burton Upon Trent and the Peak District all within easy reach along with numerous tourist attractions.
The cottages all have oak beams, wooden floors, en suite bathrooms, fully fitted kitchens, flat screen TV's with freeview, full gas central heating and free Wi-Fi. There is ample parking in the courtyard by the cottages. We are also an ideal location for wedding receptions.
The UK's No.1 Forest Adventure at Cannock...The classic and original Go Ape experience. Fly down zip-wires, leap off the Tarzan Swing and tackle crossings whilst enjoying some of Britain's most breathtaking scenery. Get off-road and explore the great outdoors on the latest all-terrain segways. From two legs to two wheels - for the ultimate forest experience on a rugged all-terrain Segway. It's a totally unique way to tackle the trails in the forest.Everyone has the Go Ape spirit just waiting to be unleashed!
Ingestre Orangery was built c1770 and stands in the grounds of Ingestre Hall. In 1960 Ingestre Hall estate was purchased from the Earl of Shrewsbury and used as a residential arts by West Bromwich Council, now known as Sandwell Council. The Orangery has been unused for many years and needs to be restored. The Friends of Ingestre Orangery aim to restore the Orangery in the grounds of Ingestre Hall to its former glory and a sustainable use by the community.


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Dear 2397
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This email is send to :.[hidden email] If you don't want to recieve emails from Coremax, please reply this email with unsuscribe. Thanks.


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Category Archives: Artsy/Crafty
Tissue Box Craft: Gift Garden
Ansley and I are entering a great contest…The 2nd Annual Tissue Box Challenge hosted by J Daniel 4's mom. The idea is to recycle a used tissue box into a child craft. Ansley had the greatest time making a Gift Garden out of her box. Your child can enjoy making one too!


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Tuesday, 24 June 2014
Hooked me into reading: Star Trek 10 by James Blish #bookaday
I could have gone for the Peter and Jane books, or the works of Enid Blyton, particularly The Enchanted Wood, The Magic Faraway Tree and The Wishing Chair. Or the Target Doctor Who books. They all played a huge part in giving me a love of reading and teaching me how to do it.
But I decided instead to highlight Star Trek 10 by James Blish, a true watershed book: the first book I got out from the big library!
When I was little, the children's library was a separate building with a separate entrance. It backed on to the grown-up library and behind the scenes I doubt there was much of a distinction. But going into the big library was a big deal for a kid.
I had learned how to use the library's microfiche catalogue to see which Doctor Who books it was worth searching for. From that I discovered that a copy of Star Trek 10 was in the grown-up library next door.
I asked a librarian, and was told I was indeed allowed to get books out from the big library. Imagine my excitement! So I went next door, found the book on the sf shelf, and took it to the counter - which I could barely reach.
The book scared the heck out of me and gave me nightmares for years. It contained "The Empath", in which I think Bones get stuffed into a giant test tube. And then (spoiler) the Empath takes all his appalling wounds onto herself, which was heartbreaking.
But I had crossed the threshold into reading grown-up books. I was a reader for life!
The Blish adaptations are still my favourite version of Star Trek. And I still find them frightening.
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