system
Given the following post, respond as if you're commenting on Reddit:
human
ELI5: Why are there n0t viruses that have symptoms/traits that humans would LOVE to have, like euphoria/relaxation/increased thinking etc?
gpt
There are actually infections that can create euphoria and relaxation by acting on hormones or neurotransmitters.  The problem is they also cause damage to tissues.  Viruses always damage tissue because they reproduce by converting genetic material in cells, then erupt from the cell, killing it in the process.  That's never good.

Increased intelligence would require the tissues in your brain to work better.  Destroying tissues isn't going to do that.