system
Given the following post, respond as if you're commenting on Reddit:
human
CMV: People should stop saying, “You’re a racist.” And start saying, “That hurts me as an [insert race] because...”

This would apply to sexism, antisemitism, homophobia, etc. as well.

When you say, “You are...”, you immediately put the other person or group on the defensive. They feel attacked. You’ve blamed them and labeled them a “bad person”. You've made assumptions about who they are based on a single or handful of interactions. They’re not likely to be receptive to your plight.

When you say, “I didn’t like that because...” or even, “that felt [something]-ist”, you take responsibility for your feelings. You are no longer blaming him for your problems, but explaining to him how his behavior impacts you. It’s no longer his fault as a terrible person that you feel bad, but it’s a combination of your history and his behavior.

Regardless of how the other person responds, if you can keep your shit together while explaining your position respectfully (even repeatedly), you can help the other person understand without alienating or creating more unnecessary conflict.

These are basic assertive communication and conflict resolution skills. It can start a conversation, rather than alienate and cause division. It connects rather than divides. 

It may be difficult to change my view on this and justify the kind of bullying we see in response to bullying, but there may be some ideas out there.

NOTE: This doesn’t apply to physically violent situations, which may require a different approach. Primarily, I’m referring to social media and in personal confrontations.
gpt
First, you need not have been personally offended to call out bigotry and prejudice.

Second, labeling a person as a racist is occasionally an accurate description. However, when a person is perhaps unintentionally or unwittingly prejudiced or discriminatory, it would more accurate to describe them as *being* racist.

To describe someone as *a* racist means that 'racist' is one of their defining characteristics.

To describe someone as *being* racist is describe another's actions or intent, not their person.

And that's a lot more effective than "That hurts me because..."