system
Given the following post, respond as if you're commenting on Reddit:
human
CMV: Nonbinary people are not trans (a trans pov)

I'm a trans woman who transitioned from male to female 13 years ago socially and 8 years ago medically (my family prohibited it, so i had to wait). Ive had "the surgery". I pass as a natal female (regardless of makeup/clothes/hair/etc.) 100% of the time (to where i live my life stealth). And genuinely this is because i want to blend in so have done everything humanely possible to do so.

Transition was an incredibly hard thing to go through and there were lots of challenges in school, home/family, street harassment, etc.

I 100% dont relate to nonbinary people, who for the most part seem to:

* Be uniformly aligned in politics (almost like its a political ideology)
* want attention / to not blend in. They take pride in being non binary and being "trans"
* Rarely if ever undergo medical transition (and the ones who do medically transition usually switch to being mtf/ftm after)
* Far more likely to play the victim / call people out on "transphobia" when its really just someone asking an honest question
* Far far more likely to have some serious deviation in sexual proclivities from societal norms (e.g. polyamory, bdsm, furries, etc. - again not that any of that is strictly bad)
* Usually advocate for demedicalizing transition (which is taking away the whole reason why insurance companies and plans are starting to cover trans related surgeries and hormones)
* Rarely if ever actually experience gender dysphoria (and if they do then usually they end up with mtf/ftm as their label eventually).
* Have no care for nuance in debate over issues related to identity
* Hold radically conflicting ideas/identities (e.g. not identifying as a woman and then claiming the lesbian label)
* Forcing people to use pronouns and often neopronouns (even going so far as to try to criminalize misgendering)

When i started transitioning nonbinary wasn't really a thing. And actual trans people made up the figureheads of our communities activism. In the last 4-6 years (but especially the last 3), nonbinary people have hijacked the movement and advocated for policies that actively hurt real trans people.

The core trans experience (imo) is wanting to blend in - regardless if you are a trans man or a trans woman. Its why while i dont get the desire that trans men have to appear as men, i understand the underlying motivation (i.e. dysphoria) and can relate in that way.

Whereas, nonbinary people seem to have nothing in common with me or the other trans people irl that i know. And worse they seem to be intent on hurting the most vulnerable people in our communities by advocating for policies that directly harm us.

Im not going so far as to say that nonbinary people are just making up new genders, because i don't think that's my place to argue that. But certainly they should be their own community separate from the trans one. And definitely a different label.

**Tldr: dyeing your hair, changing your name, and waving a trans flag does not make you trans. It makes you an asshole trying to misappropriate an identity and harming other people in the community.**

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Ive been told that im an asshole by the "trans" community for stating and believing the above. (Many others in our community have too - this has led to a mostly internal debate between 'truscum vs tucute' ideology). Im curious to get an outsiders looking in perspective. And im also hoping to get some nonbinary people in here to actually argue their points and not hide behind overly zealous censors/moderation.

I want to be wrong, help me see that im wrong please?
gpt
I think it’s more so that Gen-Z just has a different experience of being trans. 

For a long time, for Gen-X and older millenial trans people the ultimate goal was to be stealth, to blend in perfectly amongst cis people and to not have anybody know that you are trans.

Gen-Zon the other hand, due to growing up in a time when trans acceptance is a much more visible issue than ever before, are more interested in gaining acceptance for who they are, they want to be able to be out as a trans person, to not have to pass perfectly in order to avoid persecution. Additionally, Gen-Z have also been much more interested in challenging gender norms and perceptions of gender than Gen-X or millenials. 

I don’t think that someone else’s experience of gender and transness being different than yours is any reason for it not to be valid.