system
Given the following post, respond as if you're commenting on Reddit:
human
[General man-eating beasties] How many calories is an average adult male? A particularly fit adventurer (say a barbarian or the like)? A sacrificial virgin? Assume they get eaten whole, bones and all, with only moderate blood loss.
gpt
Popular Science covered it in this month's issue (oddly enough); a standard human is around 80,000 calories if you count ALL consumable tissues.

I didn't think I'd be putting that knowledge to use today.