system
Given the following post, respond as if you're commenting on Reddit:
human
[MCU] Who do I call about aliens and Avengers wrecking my car and disintegrating my roommate?

I was supposed to move in with a roommate in Manhattan, but there was some fight with "heroes" and now my car, which was parked in front of the building with all my stuff inside, was destroyed by some guy that looked like Voldemort.

Then, I'm on the phone forever with my car insurance company and the line went dead, and suddenly my roommate turned into dust and disappeared. This is a big problem as the lease was in his name and my vacuum cleaner was in my car when it got wrecked. Plus, my landlord didn't disappear and I can't afford the rent on my own.

Since Avengers were involved I tried calling SHIELD, but I got some recorded message about "hailing hydra," which sounds like really bad weather, so they're no help. Because Iron Man was there I tried to get through to the Stark company but they said they spent all their money in Slovenia or somewhere. Does anyone know who I can call about this?
gpt
Damage control inc will happily rebuild all that was broken by superhero or otherwise supernatural damages. 
Please have an inspector verify that your damages were caused by one of the causes as described by our coverage. All repairs will be funded by a special “super hero rebuilding” fund.

Have a nice day.


(And read their comic it’s worth it)