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Is someone piggybacking off of my research, or am I the issue? Dealing with "unchosen" co-authors

Hello everyone,

I need an honest opinion from someone far removed from this context.

My colleague, another PhD student, has had trouble with each of his papers as he apparently got into things he didn't know how to do. These are his words. Yesterday he told me he is just a social learner, therefore he gets into things he doesn't know how to do and that's how he learns, and then the problem is he needs lots of help and people's time, as he makes mistakes (this is verbatim what he told me). Complains that people would help without expecting anything in return in his culture, and that this country is individualistic.

To me it seems like everyone is helping him, the department gave him a statistician to work with, my supervisor does help him most of his time... so I do believe he lacks some self-awareness, and tends to blame other people.
My supervisor spends most of his time revising what he does, helping him write as his English is quite basic, etc. This PhD student has been in the project for 3 years.

After just getting started when I joined the research project a year ago, I quickly had a folder on my desktop called "Helping + Name". He needed a lot of help, writing, with reviews of papers... I was glad to. But slowly, I have come to the realization that this person doesn't have a limit, so to speak. And I would like to be less and less involved as time goes by. He has made promises in the past that looked like he was giving me an opportunity, and then he leaves it all to me. 

Now, I do have trouble saying no. I can be slow, sometimes it takes me an extra day or extra hours to deliver which can be unreliable to my supervisor. I am not faultless or perfect. Everyday I try to be better, that I can say.

Yesterday, again, after one year, my colleague remembers about this paper when my supervisor comes to celebrate I am going to a conference. He says can I tag along? My supervisor god bless his heart says yes...

At the end of the work day, he suddenly comes again, asks how he can really help for this paper. I tell him a bit about my reservations (that months ago I discussed with my supervisor if we should remove him as a coauthor, there's no time to put him up to speed), but he really seems apologetic and I believe him somewhat when he says it is time for him to help, and please, to tell him to help with anything. I tell him well, let's give it a thought, maybe I could do with some help to check validity (with me having to put him up to speed first but anyhow).

The next day? My colleague suddenly calls during one of my lectures and startles me with something about a presentation tomorrow, and informs me that he wants to use this paper as one of his core papers for reporting. He tells me he needs to present it tomorrow because his model for his paper is not working. 

I am uncomfortable. It is like I have been set up as he knew this presentation with the funding org. was happening way before. I say oh.. well I can send my slides, maybe you can put something vague together as findings are not definitive yet and you don't know much about this? Just speak about your project more and about this briefly?

The reason I am not rejecting this outright is because of my supervisor, and his good relationship with this person. I am also in good terms outside of work with him, he is alright... 

But that's not where it ends. After some time today, he tells me maybe I can be the one presenting. On whose time!Surely not mine, I don't have it! This was also after work hours, presentation happening tomorrow.

Let me stress, he has done nothing. Literally 0. When I've discussed with him my ideas about structure, findings, topic... he listened and then brings up totally unrelated ideas that he thinks could be fashionable to include.

There's 2 months before I need to submit. He doesn't know qualitative analysis, he doesn't know how to use the software, his English is not great, his knowledge on the topic is only what he's heard from me... 

Now, my supervisor likes him. From the outside he has worked with other people, no problem. Well, sometimes there's been conflicts but nothing crazy. Am I the problem? 

I was forced to have him as a coauthor as this was a decision supervisors made almost before I joined - the premise was, his literature review identified my topic in relation to something else (2 lines) therefore could speed up the process giving me grounds for my paper (which it didn't but that's beside the point, I guess they thought it was a good idea and reported that to the funding body).

Removing him from the paper causes some extra reporting and when I raised it months ago my supervisor mentioned that it's such a hassle... He wouldn't like it. I also don't want to ruin the ambiance at work as I know this guy takes things personal from how he speaks of others.

But the truth is - I am afraid helping him is going to be simply a lot of time. I am also afraid to appear needlessly disagreeable....  Maybe the best decision career-wise might be to swallow it up and keep going, try for this not to slow me down.

I had not had a panic attack in 3 years, today I had one. I also don't know if my emotions are just getting the best of me. I don't have anyone I can go to at university without revealing his identity and don't want to badmouth in the university or anything... I don't think he is a bad person, but he can be reckless and just somehow takes people for granted? I don't know how to explain this, but chances are you've met someone like this.

If you've made it here... From the bottom of my heart, thanks.
gpt
He can be you co-author, as it seems that your supervisor really wants this, but you don't have to help him. No last minute slides (that's absurd BTW), no teaching him, no presenting for him, just nothing. This would actually be the best help you can give him. It sounds like no one has made him figure stuff out for himself.