system
Given the following post, respond as if you're commenting on Reddit:
human
CMV: Polygamy is just an excuse for cheating, and indicates a lack of emotional connection.

Title just about sums it up, the whole concept doesn't make sense to me. Maybe some polyamorous people can change my mind.

In a romantic relationship, I honestly can't imagine declaring myself "polyamorous" as an excuse to sleep with other women but retain the emotional support of an SO. It just sounds like some next level manipulation, like having your cake and eating it too. It's an opportunity to prey on someone with low self esteem, who doesn't want the relationship to end so will agree to anything. My honest opinion if that if one even considers that option, then the relationship is already failing and its better in the long run for both parties to opt out or at least have a long heartfelt discussion. If my SO proposed something like that, I'd take it as a huge red flag and seriously reconsider the relationship. 

It just doesn't make sense in my head for someone to "love" more than one person romantically at a time. It goes against my base understanding of love, and seems like an excuse to cheat with permission.

To me, it says that you don't love that person enough to commit 100%, so you end up half assing it.

Edit: To clarify, Im talking about polyamorous relationships, I didn't realize polygamy specifically referenced marriage.

Edit: one more edit, I'm not talking about a sexual needs fufullment type scenario, I'm specifically referenceing loving more than one person romantically at a time.
gpt
From your post and replies to other people, it seems like the root of your argument is that you don’t feel like *you* could love more than one person romantically at one time. And you require your partner to also only romantically love you. And that’s your right, on both accounts!

But something can be okay even if it’s not right for you. 

If you’re heterosexual, you probably can’t imagine being attracted to people of the same sex as you. It might go against your base understanding of love, as you’ve experienced it, in the sense that you’ve only personally known love to be “towards someone of the opposite sex”.

Meanwhile your gay friend can’t imagine being attracted towards people who aren’t the same sex as him. The idea of having a relationship with a woman feels inherently wrong to him! He simply doesn’t experience love and attraction in quite the same way that you do.

If we agree that we might all experience romantic love and sexual attraction differently, it doesn’t make a certain kind of love any more valid than another. You might be only able to love women. Someone else might be only able to love men. You might be only able to love one person at a time. Someone else might be able to love multiple people. 

Different people experience love in different sort of ways. It’s something incredibly personal and it’s hard, if not impossible, to make someone fully understand a type of love that they don’t feel. (Could you explain loving women in such a way that your gay friend would completely “get it”? Could he convince you to love men, if you don’t?) Even if we can’t completely love people in a certain way, we can respect people who do and trust them when they tell us that’s how they experience love.

**Some people are genuinely capable of loving multiple people at once.** Some people aren’t. We’re probably never going to completely understand each other but that necessarily doesn’t mean anyone’s wrong.