Not To Be Trusted With Knives

The Internet’s leading authority on radicalized geese


10 Things I Learned On My Trip to Kelowna

  1. Constable Neil Bruce is the only school in North America named after a police officer
  2. A late model Toyota Corolla can comfortably reach speeds of up to 160 km/hr
  3. In order to make an true ice wine, the vineyard must have 3 consecutive days of -8 degrees before you pick the grapes
  4. A woopknacker is a loud, obnoxious person
  5. Drivers on Highway 97 feel no need whatsoever to turn their lights on during either a blizzard or extremely dense fog
  6. It costs $10 to drive a car on the Coquihalla Highway
  7. If you leave your hand brake on while you a driving, the people in your car will think you are an airhead for some reason
  8. Same goes for forgetting that you need to fill the car with gas, or never being able to remember which way you should turn on any given street, regardless of how many times you’ve driven there.
  9. IHOP has the world’s most disgusting hashbrowns, which complement their atrocious coffee
  10. There is a by-law in Kelowna stating that every store in the downtown core must have at least one likeness of Ogopogo on the premises at all times.

4 Responses to 10 Things I Learned On My Trip to Kelowna

  1. Jorge says:

    I’m scratching Kelowna off my places to visit list.

  2. Dave says:

    I have my doubts about number two. I’m guessing that the dash was vibrating something fierce. could be wrong, though.

  3. Beth says:

    Dave, nope, it was a totally smooth drive.

    And Jorge, why wouldn’t you want to visit Kelowna? Do you have something against wine, erratic weather or imaginary lake monsters?

  4. Stacia says:

    Could I get a lake monster in WI? I think being eaten by one would be WAY more fun than finishing my pre-lims.

Leave a Reply

