Break out the Jumpball, Starship Troopers is getting a reboot

Paul Verhoeven’s 1997 classic, Starship Troopers, is either a brilliant satire of a terrible movie or a brilliantly terrible movie, depending on whom you ask. And while fans seemingly would have already gotten their fill of giant bugs and Jumpball from two direct-to-DVD sequels, Sony, along with Fast/Furious producer Neil Moritz, have decided it’s high time for a reboot of the franchise (that’s industry talk for a remake of the original that ignores the stories of the sequels). In related news, Casper Van Dien’s offer to suck your dick for a corndog still stands. “Please,” he said, “I’m so hungry…”

Moritz has assigned the script to screenwriters Ashley Edward Miller and Zack Stentz, who, among other things, wrote Thor and X-Men: First Class, as well as many episodes of the TV shows Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles and Fringe. Of course, they also wrote Agent Cody Banks. [Vulture]

How dare you! Anyone with half a brain knows that Agent Cody Banks was actually a scathing critique of the proto-fascist tendencies of the cloak and dagger milieu, NOT TO MENTION a frolicsome send up of the post-corporate, Malcolm in the Middle middle class. In any case, I think the choice for a new Johnny Rico is obvious: Kellen Lutz. Kellen Lutz is the Casper Van Dien of the post-post-9/11 era.


Also: Is “Rico” the Latin version of “Chad?” Discuss.

When Gary Busey is your father, you’ve pretty much been preparing for this scene your entire life.

Neil Patrick Harris was in Starship Troopers, remember that?