Your Phrases Are Problematic








Whoops I rambled off there.






It’s a real journey. Ha ha.

Author: Cancer Curmudgeon


11 thoughts on “Your Phrases Are Problematic”

  1. Totally get this. You’ll notice I haven’t written much myself this past year. I’m so sick of the clichés. I’m so sick of talking about it. I think I’ve managed to avoid using both the words, “journey” and “narrative” on my blog. I recall referring to “it,” with tongue firmly in cheek, as The Adventure, or the Sleigh Ride. A lot of my references to it are an attempt not to use all expletives, to use words euphemistically and humorously, even though expletives are really mostly how I think of the damned pain in the ass that the whole cancer extravaganza has been. There ya go — mild expletives and a euphemism. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, I’m kind of sick of talking about it–in a way I’m far removed from the actual experience now (DX, treatment, etc). But I am still fascinated by the culture and how it is a microcosm of all culture. I have not written, as you know, because of my other activities. And I see so much of the same crap there as I saw in breast cancer culture. Sigh. Oh and BTW, I use experience I’ve noticed, for some time, to avoid journey or story or whatever. PITA is the best word for it though–just not the same ring: “I’m sharing my PITA with the world on my blog”. I’m tired, I’m punchy, can you tell?
      Anyway, thanks for chiming–tired of it all though we both may be! xoxo


  2. I reflected on something similar with the word “survivor”, which I have come to use not because I like it, but rather because it is the word that people understand – and it has become the word that is used by the medical profession to describe the time after treatment (i.e. survivorship).

    I confess, I like journey – but that is because I have taken many journeys in my life, so my cancer journey (sorry) is just another lens that I use to see and write about my life experiences …

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah survivor is a VERY fraught term here in CancerLand. I, too, use it only because it is a term understood by all. I’ve used former cancer patient, tho that isn’t quite accurate–I still see the onco once a year.
      Very true, cancer is just another lens, another contributing experience to how we view things in our lives. I get frustrated when people say patients should just “get over it”. What are we really, if not the sum of our experiences? Everything does (and should) affect our view.
      Thanks for chiming in!


  3. I too am sensitive to language, but I also think we need to respect the language that works for each of us. While I hate the term fighter, I also recognize that seeing themselves as a fighter helps some cancer patients cope with the experience. Similarly, when I started my blog almost a decade ago, I chose to use the word journey in its title because the metaphor of a journey resonated with me deeply. I felt I was very much in unchartered terrain as I tried to find a new direction for my life. Words like “direction” and “crossroads” all correspond to the journey metaphor for me and it helped me visualize the “road” ahead of me.

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    1. I DID think of you when I heard this podcast (a month ago, argh!) and the way they were deriding journey. I remember not liking it, feeling very strongly about it, early in my blogging days, and watching you discuss in comments section how you were OK with the journey. These days, with time and my current political activities creating a huge distance from cancer “experience” for me, I am rather detached about so many issues in CancerLand that once roused anger or passion in me. I kind of…don’t care–if that makes sense. This post is more of a rumination on how it all plays out, rather than advocating for anyone to use one term or another. Perhaps I am not making that clear these days.
      You are absolutely correct–I can loathe that society forces the label or warrior on me, can even try hard to explain why this should not be automatic–but I can’t fuss about those who willing embrace the term. I’ve seen much intolerance on ALL sides in CancerLand, over every little thing, and I’m done with it.
      As for keep journey out of narrative graphic–it is meant only to point the finger at the overuse of each phrase. To point out that to many, both words no longer mean…anything. I can decry the use of journey, but I use narrative, so what does that make me? Just as BORING.
      I can love these end of year “words we are sick of” podcasts, but here is the problem: if we keep making these year end lists, we will soon run out of words for everything.


  4. I hate the word survivor because we will never know we’ve survived cancer until we’ve died of something else. Sometimes I call it my cancer altered life path. Cancer induced life trajectory. Here I am 9 years this month of dx. Stage 3c, Her2+, ER+ entered clinical trial, 6 months neoadjuvent chemo, experimental drug with standard cocktail, mastectomy , radiation , reaction to herceptin ( flatlined!) , lost implant due to necrotic radiated tissue, tram flap surgery to get a breast after all. Developed lymphedema , hospiaized twice in 2013 for cellulitis, ongoing PT for lymphedema , while in hospital got C-Diff. Finally retired after that. Too early to receive full teacher pension. Oh, and got lichen schlerosis on labia due to Estrogen sucking tamoxifen . Every single day is maintenance of the after or maybe ongoing , it’s ravages have never stopped. So my life is and will always be forever altered . Never over and in past tense. Oh and squamous cell cancer on radiated chest area to boot. Nope, not trying to “one up” but for God’s sake never really got a before and after treatment perspective because of the lifestyle/maintenance of the long term no cure conditions I’m living with forevermore. *sigh*


    1. Boom! Exactly, until we die of something else, survivor isn’t really applicable is it? Not to be all doom and gloom…
      A friend hated the phrase “new normal”. Altered life path is perfect!


  5. Hi CC,
    I came back to reread this one. Words have clout, that’s for sure. Some of the clout is good and some not so much. So many cancer words drive me crazy. As you know. Not a fan of journey, survivor and so many others. In fact, I don’t even like saying words like, chemotherapy, mastectomy, lumpectomy or whatever cancer words you might pick. So maybe it’s not the words at all, but the stupid cancer I hate so much. I use that phrase, dominant narrative, all the time. And I use survivor, too, because people know what I’m talking about then. Or do they? Not if they lump us all together in that dominant narrative group…Didn’t realize you had a degree in Eng Lit. Or maybe I just forgot. Yeah, that’s probably it. Anyway, thought-provoking post about words. Thank you.


    1. Thank YOU! LOL my degree is more a reflection of my analytical abilities I think–all my profs would write “very perceptive” on my papers. Kinda wish I’d gone a different path embracing my analytical side, but, too late for that now.
      I’m starting to think all the words will get tiresome, simply from using any of them so much. I used to say “cancer experience”, but I got sick of myself with that one. Critics would tell me to stop talking so much about cancer then, if I get tired of the words used around it–but, that won’t happen–ha ha!
      I guess maybe the challenge is to keep it interesting to ourselves as well, and in doing so, we will keep our message fresh, a new spin on the same narrative if you will. This is probably good–so we aren’t just spouting off the same old tired thing–which in my view is a big part of the eternal pink crap. Komen and all the others are in a rut. Even the ones supposedly “shaking things up” can get in a rut with the “shake up” ways (I’m thinking the topless photos for instance, which I’ve done–ages ago–which is the point).
      Gotta keep moving, I’m just not always sure how.


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