“I’ve noticed something since I’ve been working from home,” a friend told me. “At the end of a day of Zoom calls, I avoid my family. It’s tempting to distract myself with email instead of engaging with the people I care about the most.”

I get it. One of the unexpected losses for so many people was that transition time provided by a commute. But we all know that letting that change of pattern turn into a habit of disengagement with others isn’t really the answer.

This is where the Goldilocks Principle comes in again. Disengagement is a pattern of deficiency, of doing too little of a good thing. Goldilocks tells us to correct it by using a practice of engagement. In my friend’s case, he created a habit of taking his dog for a walk at the end of the day as an active signal that it was time to transition from work to engagement with his family.

That’s what pros do. They recognize when their unhelpful pattern comes from holding back on something good, and they counteract it by leaning in. They use the Goldilocks Principle to restore a balance to their lives. By making intelligent adjustments, they get themselves back on track.

If you’re holding back, build a practice to lean in.

Be bright

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