something cute to outweigh the negative things;

oh here’s something adorable to weigh out all the bad things that happened today:

my dad and my uncle refer to rhett as my knight in rusted armor from now on.

I called him right after my accident, when my dad showed up to take care of the whole mess and when I called Rhett he immediately dropped everything he was doing at work and ran to his boss (I mean ran, I was on the phone with him the whole time) and I heard him yell “boss, can I leave? my girl was in a car accident.” his boss told him to go, definitely and Rhett was here within like half an hour to 45 minutes.

I was taking care of my knee and trying (hah) to relax when my dad and my uncle came back in the house and we all heard Rhett’s truck come rumbling down the road. Jason looked at my dad and said “Oop, here comes the knight in rusted armor.” and he said this a little more quietly - “We don’t have to worry now, he’ll make everything better.”

And sure enough from that point on today he didn’t leave my side until he made absolutely sure I was fairly okay. He took me to the hospital so my dad and Jason could go to work, he helped me realize that the car is just a car, its replaceable and its not the end of the world that its wrecked. He cuddled with me and let me cry it out. He asked me to talk about it, and I did (which is an amazing feat but I’m really trying to not bottle things up anymore anyway). He made me laugh, bought me some lunch and tried to make me see the lighter side of the situation. It worked.

This man is incredible, I love him so much. I’m like choking up while I’m writing this oh god all of my emotions aaaa klsdjgdjkfslh


absolutely no luck with cars

posted this on tumblr already, but I'll post it here too, I was almost tempted to post it to DA or FA but I'm trying to refrain from throwing my personal issues into the public, theres really no need to because I'm turning to art to keep my mind off of things anyway. But yeah, here we go...

Totaled my car, absolutely totaled it. Hit an icy patch on top of a hill, went off in a ditch, swerved back onto the road, slammed into a tree, stopped in the middle of the road. Thankfully it was just me, no one else was involved.

i walked away rom it with a bruised knee but i’m…idk.

Its the third car i’ve fucked up since I was 18.

its not like i was going 70 or anything either, i was going under 50. i think either 40 or 45, I was braking as I was going up the hill and hit a patch of black ice on the road and completely lost control of the car. Not really sure how many people believe I was going under 50 but honest to god, I was trying so hard to be careful. The damage of the car is just unreal, it looks like i was going around 50 or so but that thing sprung out of the ditch and swerved back onto the road, ramming head on into the tree at like a 90 degree angle. It was some terrifying shit.

It was all kinds of bad, and I actually got some sleep but I woke back up again and I'm discovering all kinds of aches and new bruises. Ugh. Whatever, I'll recover but god this really sucks. At least my family is really supportive and they're really not making a huge deal out of it, they've all been so helpful. And so has Rhett, he actually left work early (it all happened around 9AM) just to come home and make sure I was safe and well, he took me to the hospital to get my knee checked out. I'm limping around a bit and my knee is really swollen and looks horrible. But I can manage, it hurts but I've had far worse.

I was really distraught over the car for the longest time today, I was so worried that my dad was going to be angry, because he sounded like he was at first but he really wasn't. After we got it towed back to my grandmother's everyone was laughing (but me) and trying to cheer me up. It wasn't until a good three hours later after crying until I went hoarse that I could put things in a different perspective - I'm okay. I'm alive, a little banged up and I guess you could say my pride is shattered more than anything. I loved that car so much, I worked so hard to get it and take care of it... and to see it destroyed in seconds...ugh.

Well, there was my reflective rant about that, now I'm gonna doodle til I pass out again.


(no subject)

So things have been crazy lately. Things were really rough, I got lazy with my classes and I fell behind but I'm pretty close to caught up now.

I've actually got a lot on my mind, nothing really bad I've just been thinking a lot. I'm quite honestly too tired to go further in depth about it haha but its mostly about where I stand with my art right now. I'm pretty comfortable where I'm going with it, and I can't believe I've been doing fairly well with work already? I mean I don't get like, a hell of a lot of work but its enough to get me by and sometimes have some cash to spend on myself. Its nice, hopefully I can keep that going through the rest of the year and into the summer.

I might end up raising my prices though? from $10/hour (roughly what I charge) to maybe $15 or $20? I dunno, I've been told I should charge more but I'm afraid I'll lose business, yanno? Any opinions would be appreciated!
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(no subject)

Wow its been forever since I've used livejournal.

So I got all of my wisdom teeth taken out yesterday. First time being put under anesthesia and one of my worst nightmares came to life. One thing I have always feared about anesthesia/surgery is coming to in the middle of the procedure. Sure enough, that happened. I couldn't open my eyes, but I could hear and feel everything. I felt the dentist BREAKING my teeth, and it was the most terrifying thing I have ever experienced. I remember clutching onto the arms of the chair and whimpering to try to let them know I could feel it. They must have given me more anesthesia because I went out again, and the next thing I knew I was waking up and the procedure was over.

Seriously, that was almost traumatizing. I've never had surgery of any kind before. To start off with something like that, waking up in mid-procedure, its the scariest thing I've ever experienced in my entire life and I never wanna do it again. :c

However I am doing a LOT better today. I can eat more foods and drink more without excrutiating pain. and I'm taking less and less of my pain killers C: I'll probably end up taking a total of 3, maybe 4 today. I've only taken 2 thus far. Yesterday I took around six of them in total.