Part 5: Gnomes, Weed and Rock'n'Roll

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Gnomes, Weed and Rock'n'Roll

Off drove the cart, full with the still living sheep,
"Remember friends, please don't sell them all too cheap."
The admiral stopped waving and turned to have a chat.
"Did you find anything? Or did you just chew the fat?"

Lioniel, stood with a flourish from sitting at his leisure.
"A gold beetle we found. Dakota, has the treasure!"
Dakota withdrew the gold beetle from his dusty clothes
"Take that thing to town! The Association always knows!"

The Admiral leaves to give the horses a early morning feeding,
Nigel insisted on a ritual of elaborate holy preening.
He explains the detailed ritual to the smelly ranger, Wen.
Who says "Oooof. Sounds a treat. I better give it a go then!"

"One: assess the environment" an enthusiatic Nigel yells.
"Two: Kit off. Three: Get wet". Wen the ranger still smells.
"If there are soaps or lubricants use them" he then excitedly reports.
"Improvise when you must" he gestures strangely at his shorts.

Wenhelda disrobes which sends valiant Nigel quickly running,
While Lioniel perches on a rock nearby slowly strumming.
Mara asks Lioniel why he only sings The Bugs.
"Its what the people want to hear..." he says as he shrugs.

The Admiral returns followed by two horses and a wagon.
The party heads into town looking forward to a flagon.
Mara spots a gnome and asks him for some mushroom stew.
The food is delicious and she barely even stops to chew.

At The Stag and Tackle warm lights greet the party.
They get paid three hundred gold making them very hearty!
The sad inn keep tells Wen he can't go to the celebration
Mara shuts him down implying there's no time for fornication!

Lioniel strides off into the crowd listening hard for a performer
A dancer or a singer? Hopefully not the former.
He spots Lola Ramsay playing The Bugs on her lute
"I challenge you to a duel!" shouts Lioniel waving his flute.

Lioniel performs "Hard Mage Night" to liven up the crowd
The audience cheers in happiness and are very loud
Lola steps up to start her song but her voice suddenly breaks
She does not know Nigel caused her to make these mistakes

Lola leaves as Lioniel shouts "The only loser today was the crowd"
Nigel is overcome with guilt. "I will not do it again!" he vowed.
Mara runs after Lola, worried about her feeling bad
She finds her in the Greenroom and sees her looking sad

"Magic was involved Lola! You cannot blame yourself!"
"I know you fool. That bard will pay! He's sneaky like an elf!"
Mara is angered at this rage toward a friend who is so cool.
"The reckoning will be yours if you even go near that fool!"

Lioniel finishes another song and returns to Wen in the throng
"Lets go and get some weed and smoke it in a bong!"
The two of them meet a dabbing dwarf, the most mellow ever seen.
They end up buying some "Fairy's delight" all dank and sticky green.
"Here take this as well. Orcsbane. Free for this diehard!"
Wen is handed some more gear and passes it onto the bard.

Mara walks into the Stag and Tackle feeling quite upset.
"Gimme something really strong" she says wiping away the sweat.
She sits down next to Sir Nigel who has a black band around his head.
"I have made a vow. I am now in penance." His face is turning red.

Dakota and the Admiral arrive excited and ready to have a drink.
Dakota sits down next to Mara "One elvish ale I think".
Mara banters with the elf. His haughtiness is annoying.
Dakota banters right back. A debate he's surely enjoying.

"Mara come and join us. To The Desert of Desolation we go!"
Mara replies "For pay I'll come. Only if you can get the others, though."
Nigel says "I shall rise above and pledge my soul to be the best I can.
And smite evil and make the dead return, from the world of man."

Nigel then heroically draws his sword and raises it into the air.
He then tumbles backwards clumsily landing on his Derrière.
"And rise like a Pheonix" says Mara as she bends and helps him up.
"Up stairs you go now" she gestures and puts down his empty cup.

Giant pipe in hand, Wen walks in followed by Lioniel with a puff.
"Going to bed already young lad?" calls the singer "Well enough!".
Dakota asks the bard to travel East and he says "Sure, why not."
He turns to Wenhelda and asks her too. She promptly says "Crackpot!"

Wenhelda then explains that her clever mother has gone missing,
Unless The Association can help her then this offer she was dismissing.
Daktoa looks at the book Wen has and says "This is one of ours!
We can totally help you out with this. It's written in the stars!"

Mara looks at him with a sour face. She squirms a bit then sighs.
Dakota turns to Sara and opens his mouth but she immediately replies.


And so our party head to bed, to get ready to depart.
As they go up the stairs a sleeping Nigel drops a huge fart...