Never Be Yourself (2020)

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If you are young enough to remember being in school and some teacher or speaker telling you that you can be whatever you want to be when you grow up then you are probably of the age where you now realize what load shit that was. They were really really really really wrong.

I don’t know about other people, but it’s good not to lie to young people. Why don’t we just tell them the truth? You know…… that in our capitalist society the chances of you being comfortable and happy are very unlikely.

“Hey little Jimmy, just letting you know, You will probably end up in a job completely unrelated to what you studied for a university. You’ll have a crippling debt for the student loan. You’ll take a low paying shit ball job in some sales company bullshitting other poor bastards like yourself into more scams and schemes like solar power or magnetic bracelets or heart monitors or insurance. You’ll say that it’s just a stepping stone to some other better job, but years go by and nothing happens. Eventually, you will accept you are pretty fucking worthless and justify your existence by starting a family with some average looking but really controlling wife. You’ll hope it will resolve that disappointing career and you’ll buy and house and accumulate even more debt that you’ll never repay. Eventually, the chances are, your marriage will fail and your children will hate you forever. Shall we go on…..? Okay, it looks like someone is a bit of cry baby, Geeeezzzz…Just trying to help.

Weird isn’t it? You know what. I really should have listened to my teachers though. I mean I know they were trying to be positive because they have to be. They were like, Ohhhh yeah, your great with your hands, you’d be a great plumber.

But you know, I kind of had a feeling I might transition in the future and so I thought, I should probably become something a bit more gender-friendly. So I became a teacher. But the problem is that I did not have a mindset that considered one minor detail. That all parents and members of the educational community are anti LGBTIQ2A. All of them. ALLLLLLLL, no exceptions! To this day!

Now I get that some pretend they are progressive and cool and whatever they think is jazzy and hip for their friends or colleagues or they can add their resume or get money to siphon of funds from to add the Christmas party slush fund for better booze or some bullshit fucking rally they went on so they had some excuse to dress up like a unicorn with rainbow crap everywhere. The truth is its a show. It’s a lie to their children and they lie to their children’s teachers and at the end of the day, it’s just a bunch glitter that stuck in the carpet of mums Mazda SUV.

That last bit was basically just ranty pile of shit but it gives this slag of writing context. What I am really trying to say is, despite all the criminal record checks, all the child protection modules, all the safety, all the non-swearing, all the passive discipline, all the parenting that was meant to have been done at home, LGBTIQ2A teachers are still seen as; vagrants, pedophiles, molesters, idiots, in the wrong, a bad influence purely because they exist at all. I should know. I was one once. Is it still too late to be a plumber?

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